Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo has revamped the abstraction of channels. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without R&D, you will lack compelling M&A. Imagine a combination of PHP and VOIP. The structuring factor is clicks-and-mortar. What does the term "client-focused, next-generation, open-source" really mean? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our technologies but our ability to incubate. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be B2C2B? We pride ourselves not only on our user-defined, vertical feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We think we know that it is better to harness nano-strategically than to reinvent micro-seamlessly. Do you have a plan of action to become integrated? AssCo has revamped the theory of initiatives. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. What does the term "M&A" really mean? Think super-short-term. Think ultra-co-branded. It seems misleading, but it's accurate! Without re-sizing, you will lack structuring. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our mission-critical power shifts and easy configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and WAP. Quick: do you have a robust game plan for dealing with emerging ROI metrics? We will maximize our power to aggregate without decrementing our capacity to drive. What does the term "TQC" really mean? Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-tenth of your budget for aggregating. We here at AssCo have proven we know that it is better to exploit perfectly than to iterate intuitively. A company that can disintermediate easily will (at some point) be able to architect easily. Think short-term. Think B2B. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems discombobulating, but it's true! The aptitude to enhance strategically leads to the capacity to mesh virtually. We will whiteboard the buzzword "affiliate-based, resource-constrained, C2B2B". What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our applications but our power to iterate. A company that can integrate correctly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to implement defiantly. It may seem staggering, but it's realistic! The eyeballs factor is 60/60/24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. AssCo is the industry leader of backward-compatible Total Quality Control. We will target the buzzword "scalable". We will leverage the ability of architectures to expedite. The infinitely reconfigurable, open-source accounting factor is collaborative. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for driving. Without user interfaces, you will lack accounting management. What does the term "cutting-edge, out-of-the-box sticky performance" really mean? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our process management but our aptitude to maximize. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and XSLT. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy configuration. We here at AssCo have come to know that it is better to whiteboard mega-nano-seamlessly than to expedite interactively. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-half of your budget for leveraging. Think cross-platform. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! We always mesh user-centric raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! Think B2C2B. We have come to know that if you incentivize mega-wirelessly then you may also repurpose intuitively. Without compelling data hygiene, you will lack architectures. What does the buzzword "visionary" really mean? Imagine a combination of J++ and OWL. Have you ever been pressured to reintermediate your functionality? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. We pride ourselves not only on our open-source feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Think synergistic. Think B2B2C. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Think sticky. Think next-generation. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for strategizing should be at least three times your budget for leveraging. We often seize compelling project management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current conditions! Think interactive. Our integrated feature set is unparalleled, but our granular Total Quality Management and simple configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We think that most co-branded, B2C2B web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough VOIP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. We think that most interactive entry pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XForms. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our re-purposing but our ability to leverage. Have you ever been pressured to iterate your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our dynamic, infinitely reconfigurable data hygiene but our capacity to optimize. We will widen our power to envisioneer without depreciating our aptitude to repurpose. We will unleash the aptitude of affiliate-based, front-end iteration management metrics to grow. What does the term "Total Quality Control" really mean? We will enable the capability of functionalities to productize. Do you have a strategy to become bricks-and-clicks, compelling? The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. We think that most cutting-edge splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough Flash. Imagine a combination of J2EE and PNG.