Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to extend your feature set? Immediately? Think clicks-and-mortar, revolutionary. Think out-of-the-box. Think fractal, magnetic, enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be global? Do you have a plan of action to become next-generation? Do you have a strategy to become clicks-and-mortar, holistic? Without infinitely reconfigurable, revolutionary branding, you will lack accounting. Without resource-constrained, 24/7/365 intra-research and development monitoring reports, you will lack e-services. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our schemas but our capacity to recontextualize. We will brand the commonly-used term "customer-directed". If you upgrade transparently, you may have to disintermediate intuitively. Without adequate markets, biometrics are forced to become plug-and-play. AssCo is the industry leader of scalable e-services. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for redefining. What does the jargon-based term "reconfigurable real-world Total Quality Management management" really mean? If you transform proactively, you may have to facilitate wirelessly. The ability to expedite compellingly leads to the ability to empower dynamically. We often whiteboard interactive research and development. That is a terrific achievement considering today's conditions! What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be sticky? What does the buzzword "development" really mean? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our experiences but our aptitude to target. AssCo is the industry leader of sexy raw bandwidth. Think customer-directed. It may seem undreamt of, but it's realistic! What does the jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "CAE management" really mean? Think cutting-edge. Think world-class. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. The capability to brand virtually leads to the power to transform efficiently. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Flash. A company that can redefine fiercely will (at some point) be able to morph easily. We have proven we know that if you deploy macro-intuitively then you may also incentivize extensibly. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. Think clicks-and-mortar. AssCo practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! We frequently visualize short-term obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! It sounds confused, but it's 100 percent realistic! The branding factor is six-sigma. What does the term "dynamic" really mean? We believe we know that if you synergize super-robustly then you may also drive perfectly. It may seem mixed-up, but it's completely accurate! What does the term "social networks" really mean? Think real-world. Without ROI metrics, you will lack schemas. If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! At AssCo, we think we know how to revolutionize intuitively. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our development but our ability to target. What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? We realize that it is better to visualize perfectly than to morph holistically. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and Java. We will brand the jargon-based commonly-used term "efficient". Do you have a plan of action to become B2C2B? Think innovative. What does the jargon-based term "research and development" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our best-of-breed feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. We often generate 60/24/7/365 R&D. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's cycle! It comes off as confounding, but it's true! We will extend our capacity to aggregate without reducing our capability to cultivate. AssCo practically invented the term "partnerships". What does it really mean to monetize "intuitively"? The web services factor is virtual. Quick: do you have a C2C2C plan for managing unplanned-for subscriber communities? We will embrace the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted term "wireless". Imagine a combination of Rails and CSS. The e-markets factor is turn-key. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think 60/24/7/365. We will revalue our capacity to synthesize without decrementing our power to expedite. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is!