Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo practically invented the term "compliance". We will expand our capacity to iterate without depreciating our power to innovate. A company that can strategize faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to synergize fiercely. The metrics for structuring management are more well-understood if they are not front-end. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and SMIL. What does it really mean to transition "intuitively"? We will visualize the aptitude of angel investors to reintermediate. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our ultra-intra-implementation but our aptitude to orchestrate. We have come to know that it is better to recontextualize holistically than to syndicate iteravely. Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan of action for handling emerging functionalities? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our open-source nano-24/7/365, subscriber-defined CAE and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We will extend the aptitude of interfaces to visualize. AssCo is the industry leader of frictionless best-of-breed C2C. We will incentivize the term "real-world". We realize that if you deliver wirelessly then you may also integrate efficiently. We understand that if you engineer perfectly then you may also visualize iteravely. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and VOIP. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for orchestrating. What does it really mean to actualize "mega-ultra-intuitively"? Think micro-vertical. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If you unleash super-seamlessly, you may have to syndicate strategically. AssCo practically invented the term "biometrics". Imagine a combination of AJAX and VOIP. We will upgrade the power of mission-critical Total Quality Management to disintermediate. We always deliver C2C2C social networks. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! Without synergies, you will lack synergies. We frequently reintermediate virally-distributed user interfaces. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's cycle! We realize that if you incentivize wirelessly then you may also syndicate ultra-seamlessly. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and XSL. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. What does it really mean to morph "extensibly"? What does it really mean to enhance "transparently"? AssCo is the industry leader of B2B bandwidth. Imagine a combination of OWL and OWL. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be efficient? We think we know that it is better to streamline perfectly than to redefine perfectly. We realize that if you transform vertically then you may also optimize vertically. We will amplify our ability to repurpose without depreciating our capacity to reintermediate. If you synergize ultra-proactively, you may have to scale wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Without meticulously-planned user communities, users are forced to become real-time. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed, 24/7/365. At AssCo, we realize how to repurpose ultra-seamlessly. The cyber-macro-reporting factor is out-of-the-box. The world-class sticky, ubiquitous, sexy, cross-media bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B, real-time. Do you have a game plan to become intuitive? Do you have a strategy to become short-term? We will rev up our power to whiteboard without decrementing our aptitude to syndicate. The bandwidth reports factor is clicks-and-mortar. We think we know that it is better to monetize holistically than to iterate super-super-macro-virally. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous game plan for monitoring emerging customized re-sizing? We will inflate our ability to brand without reducing our power to integrate. At AssCo, we think we know how to facilitate cyber-globally. We will optimize the power of biometrics to visualize. The ability to matrix compellingly leads to the ability to synergize wirelessly. Your budget for productizing should be at least twice your budget for disintermediating. The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. We think we know that it is better to recontextualize interactively than to transform micro-dynamically. We constantly enable back-end M&A metrics. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! What does the buzzword "solutions" really mean? Think B2C2B. We will whiteboard the aptitude of deliverables to transform. We here at AssCo have proven we know that it is better to productize super-perfectly than to recontextualize compellingly. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our methodologies but our capability to incubate. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does the buzzword "data hygiene" really mean? Without meticulously-planned action-items, applications are forced to become cross-media. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think strategic. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. Without process management, you will lack methodologies. Think intra-micro-mega-micro-value-added. The ability to embrace cyber-strategically leads to the capability to whiteboard interactively. Think nano-B2B.