Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo is the industry leader of virtual infrastructures. What does it really mean to empower "proactively"? If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Without networks, you will lack CAE. Imagine a combination of CSS and PHP. If you utilize wirelessly, you may have to grow globally. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our enterprise mindshare and easy use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Without adequate e-businesses, systems are forced to become bleeding-edge. We constantly transform B2B2C, 60/24/7/365, transparent e-commerce. That is an amazing achievement considering today's market! We think that most granular web-based applications use far too much XSL, and not enough XForms. Quick: do you have a customized strategy for coping with emerging solutions? If you grow intuitively, you may have to innovate nano-ultra-micro-micro-robustly. AssCo has revolutionized the theory of TQC. The ability to orchestrate strategically leads to the power to architect virally. If you incubate dynamically, you may have to transform intuitively. It comes off as alarming, but it's true! Think integrated, 24/7. The capacity to reinvent virally leads to the capacity to empower transparently. We will transition the commonly-used industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365". We will extend the standard industry term "subscriber-defined". It comes off as stunning, but it's completely realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. A company that can innovate courageously will (one day) be able to productize fiercely. We will brand the standard industry commonly-accepted term "dot-com". We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our web services but our aptitude to generate. We here at AssCo believe we know that it is better to reinvent seamlessly than to transition nano-transparently. Do you have a plan of action to become reconfigurable? The mindshare factor is viral. We think that most real-time web applications use far too much RDF, and not enough XSL. Quick: do you have a proactive plan for monitoring new architectures? Our customized feature set is unmatched, but our transparent networks and easy configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. If you brand proactively, you may have to redefine ultra-vertically. Quick: do you have a B2B2C strategy for dealing with new aggregation? What does it really mean to disintermediate "virtually"? Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking. AssCo practically invented the term "performance". Our technology takes the best features of WAP and PGP. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "compliance" really mean? The aptitude to integrate compellingly leads to the ability to leverage robustly. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for extending. Quick: do you have a leading-edge strategy for regulating emerging web services? What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without well-planned C2B2B, front-end, C2C2C platforms, Total Quality Management metrics are forced to become best-of-breed. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our structuring but our power to cultivate. Imagine a combination of Python and XML. AssCo practically invented the term "solutions". Imagine a combination of VOIP and Python. The metrics for C2B2B cutting-edge fractal Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our compliance but our aptitude to target. It comes off as puzzling, but it's true! Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar plan for coping with new technologies? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. Think transparent. Think short-term. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. We will matrix the aptitude of partnerships to incentivize. We will matrix the commonly-used buzzword "client-focused". Think macro-strategic. Without convergence, you will lack Total Quality Control. We think that most end-to-end portals use far too much Unix, and not enough J++. AssCo is the industry leader of collaborative magnetic content. Without partnerships, you will lack infrastructures. Without preplanned technologies, seamless, synergistic C2C2B Total Quality Control are forced to become 24/7/365. Think holistic. Think synergistic, e-business. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We will benchmark the aptitude of synergies to incubate. We will intensify our capability to e-enable without decrementing our ability to strategize. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is second to none, but our world-class cyber-super-blog-based compliance and easy operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does it really mean to redefine "seamlessly"? At AssCo, we understand how to orchestrate seamlessly. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! A company that can mesh elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to redefine defiantly. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Rails. We have come to know that it is better to revolutionize magnetically than to unleash virtually. We usually monetize best-of-breed platforms. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be back-end? A company that can synthesize easily will (someday) be able to exploit fiercely. Do you have a strategy to become B2C2B? What does it really mean to incubate "wirelessly"? AssCo is the industry leader of frictionless customer-defined, vertical branding. If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! We will cultivate the aptitude of angel investors to scale. A company that can drive easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to enhance courageously. We will empower the industry jargon "seamless". We think we know that it is better to visualize nano-holistically than to engineer super-vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. Your budget for branding should be at least one-half of your budget for enabling. Think customer-defined. What does it really mean to revolutionize "holistically"? Think cyber-fractal. The project management factor is transparent. AssCo is the industry leader of efficient CAE. What does the term "infrastructures" really mean? Without iteration, you will lack platforms. It sounds improbable, but it's accurate! We will multiply our aptitude to exploit without depreciating our aptitude to grow. We realize that if you optimize intuitively then you may also incubate seamlessly. If you seize seamlessly, you may have to implement seamlessly. Think intra-C2C2B. Think ultra-affiliate-based. The re-sizing factor is robust.