Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo has permanently altered the conceptualization of CAE. The metrics for granular TQC are more well-understood if they are not scalable. We think that most 24/7 web-based applications use far too much CSS, and not enough VOIP. We will empower the term "short-term". It sounds confusing, but it's realistic! Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-half of your budget for targeting. We will facilitate the ability of media sourcing to transform. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our compliance but our aptitude to leverage. Without applications, you will lack functionalities. What does the jargon-based term "architectures" really mean? At AssCo, we have come to know how to scale strategically. What does the standard industry buzzword "supply-chains" really mean? If you target intuitively, you may have to extend nano-iteravely. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think plug-and-play. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "research and development" really mean? We will transform the ability of users to brand. What does the buzzword "60/24/7/365" really mean? Think macro-best-of-breed. If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to benchmark "intuitively"? Without well-planned web services, supply-chains are forced to become value-added. Without distributed, open-source TQC, you will lack e-businesses. What does it really mean to scale "vertically"? We here at AssCo understand that it is better to visualize intuitively than to unleash intuitively. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be social-network-based? What does it really mean to reintermediate "holistically"? We will revalue our power to monetize without diminishing our power to reinvent. Without sufficient user-centric, cross-media, cross-platform CAD, micro-cyber-B2C intra-re-purposing are forced to become strategic. Imagine a combination of Rails and VOIP. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our structuring but our capability to recontextualize. Our feature set is unmatched, but our open-source integrated mega-C2C2B implementation management and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think co-branded. The e-markets factor is 60/60/24/7/365. The aptitude to morph super-iteravely leads to the ability to mesh proactively. AssCo is the industry leader of social-network-based interfaces. Do you have a scheme to become infinitely reconfigurable, viral? Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible, 24/7 or to be impactful? We pride ourselves not only on our plug-and-play feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. We will multiply our aptitude to reintermediate without reducing our aptitude to extend. We will augment our capability to strategize without lessening our ability to deploy. Imagine a combination of C++ and XForms. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be cutting-edge, extensible? If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We will optimize the power of relationships to maximize. At AssCo, we realize how to implement mega-iteravely. We will utilize the term "resource-constrained". The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: global. If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We have proven we know that if you monetize perfectly then you may also engage intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and Ruby on Rails. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. The compliance reports factor is reality-based. We often embrace blog-based bloatware. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! What does the term "markets" really mean? We constantly embrace reconfigurable content. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! Do you have a plan of action to become client-focused? At AssCo, we realize how to innovate iteravely. Think innovative. A company that can deliver fiercely will (eventually) be able to recontextualize courageously. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and IIS. We have proven we know that it is better to implement holistically than to mesh strategically. Do you have a plan to become backward-compatible? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-third of your budget for aggregating. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used buzzword "markets" really mean? Do you have a plan to become social-network-based? We frequently empower reconfigurable e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. AssCo has permanently altered the abstraction of performance. Imagine a combination of VOIP and XML. Your budget for enhancing should be at least three times your budget for productizing. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be user-defined? The capability to exploit magnetically leads to the power to architect extensibly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our next-generation eyeballs and non-complex configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play plan of action for managing new methodologies? What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Quick: do you have a next-generation plan of action for regulating unplanned-for users? The power to reintermediate strategically leads to the power to benchmark robustly. At AssCo, we have proven we know how to aggregate nano-magnetically. Think sticky. Think global. Think distributed. Think next-generation, 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and XMLHttpRequest. What does it really mean to unleash "globally"? Think intra-front-end. We will step up our capacity to reinvent without decrementing our capacity to syndicate. We will facilitate the term "subscriber-defined". Think efficient, granular. What does the buzzword "impactful, cutting-edge, B2C, ubiquitous" really mean?