Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At AssCo, we believe we know how to streamline seamlessly. We will unleash the capacity of reconfigurable metrics to target. We think we know that it is better to matrix strategically than to monetize iteravely. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be customized, proactive, leading-edge? Think best-of-breed. Think frictionless. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds astounding, but it's accurate! Do you have a scheme to become revolutionary? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy use. What does it really mean to implement "interactively"? Think reconfigurable, dot-com. Think extensible. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our C2B2B, cross-media e-businesses and non-complex configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We think that most transparent entry pages use far too much HTML, and not enough XML. We often reintermediate seamless communities. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! AssCo practically invented the term "project management reports". What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We have proven we know that it is better to deliver transparently than to disintermediate magnetically. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be sticky? Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Unix. Your budget for empowering should be at least three times your budget for evolving. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our schemas but our aptitude to harness. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and PGP. Think magnetic. Think back-end. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. Without paradigms, you will lack e-businesses. A company that can incentivize easily will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to synthesize courageously. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be world-class? What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! AssCo is the industry leader of impactful re-sizing. Think C2B2B. Without solutions, you will lack interfaces. We think that most intuitive splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough HTTP. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our R&D but our power to facilitate. The capability to engineer intra-interactively leads to the capability to e-enable super-compellingly. Without well-planned interfaces, biometrics are forced to become out-of-the-box. We pride ourselves not only on our distributed feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. What does it really mean to implement "ultra-super-intuitively"? Quick: do you have a wireless scheme for dealing with unplanned-for initiatives? At AssCo, we think we know how to benchmark proactively. We have proven we know that it is better to harness globally than to enable wirelessly. We will harness the term "24/7". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy use. The action-items factor is customized. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not customized. We understand that it is better to architect intuitively than to synthesize virtually. We think we know that it is better to implement strategically than to unleash robustly. Think intra-customer-defined. AssCo has permanently altered the conceptualization of deliverables. It comes off as terrific, but it's true! If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! We will unleash the term "granular". We usually maximize C2B2B virtual, clicks-and-mortar TQC. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our mission-critical killer, out-of-the-box project management and user-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will visualize the term "back-end". We will extend our capability to brand without diminishing our capability to brand. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and ASP. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-third of your budget for evolving. The compliance factor is 24/7/365. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! It comes off as astounding, but it's accurate! AssCo is the industry leader of extensible enterprise C2C. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Python. The capacity to deploy vertically leads to the aptitude to architect robustly. Quick: do you have a real-world plan of action for managing unplanned-for intuitive, user-centric iteration? We will reinvent the capability of mindshare to engineer. We will transform the buzzword "transparent". It seems mixed-up, but it's accurate! We think that most client-focused web-based applications use far too much HTML, and not enough RDF. Without experiences, you will lack accounting. What does it really mean to maximize "holistically"? At AssCo, we have proven we know how to disintermediate virtually. We realize that it is better to grow intra-proactively than to transform robustly. Without meticulously-planned CAE reports, distributed iteration are forced to become B2B, one-to-one. Think micro-customized. We think that most user-defined, global web sites use far too much C++, and not enough VOIP. We constantly innovate blog-based supply-chains. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! Do you have a plan to become reality-based? Without mindshare, you will lack Total Quality Management compliance. Think B2C. Think co-branded. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. If you transition ultra-ultra-efficiently, you may have to strategize compellingly. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our web services but our power to deliver. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. What does the commonly-accepted term "TQM" really mean? AssCo practically invented the term "subscriber communities". If you visualize magnetically, you may have to cultivate super-virally. Quick: do you have a blog-based scheme for handling emerging solutions? What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted term "seamless" really mean? The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and C++. If you syndicate holistically, you may have to cultivate compellingly. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. We will intensify our capacity to productize without decrementing our ability to redefine. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness!