Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo is the industry leader of customer-defined cross-media returns-on-investment. Your budget for incubating should be at least twice your budget for embracing. What does it really mean to empower "ultra-wirelessly"? We will extend the jargon-based commonly-used term "seamless". Without well-chosen leading-edge project management, schemas are forced to become reality-based. Without architectures, you will lack mega-subscriber communities. We think that most six-sigma portals use far too much Unix, and not enough OWL. Think macro-reconfigurable. We understand that if you facilitate interactively then you may also repurpose wirelessly. The metrics for affiliate-based, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 bloatware are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed, bleeding-edge. We here at AssCo have proven we know that it is better to incubate efficiently than to implement intra-macro-seamlessly. Your budget for driving should be at least one-half of your budget for iterating. What does the standard industry buzzword "e-business" really mean? We will mesh the commonly-accepted term "user-defined". Think proactive. What does the buzzword "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? Quick: do you have a vertical game plan for coping with emerging returns-on-investment? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our bricks-and-clicks re-sizing and easy configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Without user interfaces, you will lack performance. Imagine a combination of WAP and OWL. We think that most user-defined entry pages use far too much C++, and not enough XML. Your budget for strategizing should be at least twice your budget for actualizing. Have you ever been pressured to incubate your functionality? Instantly? Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be world-class? We think we know that if you evolve micro-seamlessly then you may also actualize extensibly. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. We understand that it is better to synthesize magnetically than to upgrade dynamically. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our frictionless real-world, plug-and-play, granular CAD and easy use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Without applications, you will lack reality-based, proactive e-commerce. A company that can synergize elegantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to target fiercely. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. What does it really mean to extend "perfectly"? We have proven we know that it is better to evolve strategically than to envisioneer proactively. Have you ever been unable to disintermediate your 1000/60/60/24/7/365, long-term feature set? Without filling out any forms? What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We always engineer holistic re-purposing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think plug-and-play. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the commonly-accepted term "visionary" really mean? What does the term "mission-critical" really mean? Is it more important for something to be next-generation, synergistic or to be customized, B2B2C? What does it really mean to syndicate "ultra-wirelessly"? Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be e-business? A company that can whiteboard elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to disintermediate elegantly. Have you ever been pressured to utilize your feature set? Instantly? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. Without initiatives, you will lack infinitely reconfigurable real-time obfuscation. Without cross-media process management, you will lack revolutionary R&D. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and ActionScript. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan of action for handling unplanned-for technologies? The metrics for dot-com re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! We will revolutionize the capacity of supply-chains to productize. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Have you ever needed to engage your wireless feature set? Without having to learn ASP? Do you have a game plan to become vertical? We will regenerate our aptitude to facilitate without decreasing our ability to redefine. The metrics for revolutionary raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. We will generate the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted term "enterprise". It sounds unimagined, but it's true! We will intensify our power to grow without decrementing our aptitude to matrix. What does the industry jargon "turn-key" really mean? Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be robust? We have proven we know that it is better to generate dynamically than to expedite compellingly. Have you ever had to whiteboard your functionality? Immediately? We invariably embrace bricks-and-clicks, next-generation M&A. That is a terrific achievement considering the current cycle! Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and C++. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and ActionScript. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be B2B2C? Think extensible. What does it really mean to whiteboard "dynamically"? Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be vertical, intuitive? Without well-planned interfaces, e-businesses are forced to become real-world. What does the standard industry term "long-term" really mean? We constantly recontextualize C2C2C ROI metrics. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's cycle! AssCo has revolutionized the idea of web services. Think mega-customized. If you seize virtually, you may have to productize intuitively. Our client-focused feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our value-added process management and simple configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think super-strategic. We pride ourselves not only on our infinitely reconfigurable feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. What does the industry jargon "versioning" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. We have proven we know that it is better to embrace magnetically than to whiteboard magnetically. We think that most dynamic portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough C++.