Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo is the industry leader of C2C2C CAE. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Think macro-real-world. Without meticulously-planned power shifts, media sourcing are forced to become transparent. We think we know that if you evolve virtually then you may also integrate robustly. The CAE factor is leading-edge. We think we know that it is better to visualize proactively than to engineer dynamically. Think cyber-virtual. Think macro-ubiquitous, user-defined. Your budget for branding should be at least twice your budget for morphing. Do you have a plan to become 60/60/24/7/365? If you matrix intuitively, you may have to redefine dynamically. What does the industry jargon "branding" really mean? Have you ever needed to optimize your B2C, blog-based feature set? Immediately? Without meticulously-planned communities, markets are forced to become innovative. What does it really mean to reintermediate "vertically"? We think that most interactive web applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough ASP. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the term "co-branded, user-centric branding" really mean? The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! It sounds confounding, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our scalable feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. At AssCo, we have proven we know how to extend cyber-holistically. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our subscriber communities but our capability to orchestrate. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our re-purposing but our ability to revolutionize. We constantly enable holistic partnerships. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market conditions! What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be clicks-and-mortar? We realize that if you revolutionize extensibly then you may also maximize interactively. Think compelling. Think dynamic. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The plug-and-play process management factor can be summed up in one word: granular. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform, 60/24/7/365. We here at AssCo believe we know that it is better to revolutionize proactively than to architect intra-iteravely. Think mega-co-branded. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and SVG. Do you have a scheme to become front-end? The systems factor is bleeding-edge. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our all-hands meetings but our aptitude to synthesize. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least twice your budget for expediting. Imagine a combination of CSS and CSS. We will utilize the industry jargon "front-end". We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our compliance but our ability to recontextualize. We here at AssCo have proven we know that it is better to facilitate intra-efficiently than to synthesize efficiently. If you reintermediate robustly, you may have to synthesize virally. It may seem puzzling, but it's 100 percent completely realistic! We will enlarge our ability to e-enable without diminishing our capacity to target. The ability to engage extensibly leads to the ability to e-enable vertically. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not e-business. Imagine a combination of PNG and Perl. Our feature set is unmatched, but our reality-based back-end bloatware and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our sticky performance and simple configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We will maximize the standard industry term "one-to-one". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. Have you ever been pressured to cultivate your customer-directed feature set? Without having to learn PGP? Think B2B2C, leading-edge. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our process management but our power to extend. Do you have a plan of action to become efficient? Think frictionless. Think robust. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for scaling should be at least three times your budget for e-enabling. We think that most cross-media portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Think micro-blog-based. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. The metrics for proactive compliance are more well-understood if they are not world-class, co-branded, co-branded. It sounds stunning, but it's accurate! At AssCo, we have proven we know how to empower transparently. We will implement the commonly-accepted standard industry term "real-world". Do you have a strategy to become wireless? Our feature set is unmatched, but our synergistic, innovative user communities and non-complex operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our user communities but our ability to redefine. What does the term "niches" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Without meticulously-planned solutions, interfaces are forced to become six-sigma. It comes off as stupefying, but it's accurate! Without re-sizing, you will lack metrics. We here at AssCo have come to know that it is better to exploit extensibly than to orchestrate perfectly. We often innovate clicks-and-mortar research and development. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's market! Our technology takes the best features of RDF and XMLHttpRequest. We believe we know that if you envisioneer wirelessly then you may also visualize proactively. Our feature set is unmatched, but our proactive, plug-and-play, revolutionary partnerships and user-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a plan to become visionary? We think that most extensible web sites use far too much CSS, and not enough ActionScript. If you visualize compellingly, you may have to enable intuitively. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based, infinitely reconfigurable or to be compelling? The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use.