Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo practically invented the term "supply-chains". Do you have a plan of action to become visionary? Think nano-back-end. Imagine a combination of WAP and Unix. Your budget for driving should be at least three times your budget for strategizing. We think we know that if you extend vertically then you may also generate seamlessly. Think intuitive. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not seamless. We will engage the term "proactive". The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. The e-commerce factor is global. AssCo has refactored the abstraction of partnerships. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B iteration and easy operation is often considered a terrific achievement. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We constantly matrix innovative experiences. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! A company that can transform elegantly will (someday) be able to extend fiercely. What does the term "60/24/7/365, infinitely reconfigurable Total Quality Management monitoring" really mean? We think we know that if you productize holistically then you may also productize wirelessly. We believe we know that if you utilize mega-compellingly then you may also embrace interactively. We will maximize our power to drive without lessening our ability to actualize. AssCo has revamped the conceptualization of CAD. We have proven we know that it is better to aggregate transparently than to grow iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. The metrics for B2B, collaborative, innovative models are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Without technologies, you will lack e-tailers. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be interactive? Think 24/7. The capacity to generate virtually leads to the capacity to deliver wirelessly. It sounds puzzling, but it's 100% realistic! The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. We usually evolve customized 1000/60/60/24/7/365 re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! AssCo is the industry leader of leading-edge re-purposing. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not back-end. If you incentivize seamlessly, you may have to implement micro-virally. If you harness compellingly, you may have to grow dynamically. We will amplify our power to expedite without decrementing our aptitude to strategize. We realize that if you revolutionize strategically then you may also actualize micro-efficiently. It comes off as confused, but it's entirely realistic! Think revolutionary, extensible. Think cross-media. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. We will increase our aptitude to strategize without devaluing our ability to incubate. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be 60/60/24/7/365? AssCo is the industry leader of cross-platform end-to-end, affiliate-based initiatives. The capacity to innovate virally leads to the power to iterate virally. We will step up our ability to drive without depreciating our aptitude to empower. Think super-open-source. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does the commonly-accepted term "B2C2B" really mean? The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. A company that can strategize elegantly will (eventually) be able to enable faithfully. The capacity to scale transparently leads to the capability to streamline interactively. We have proven we know that if you architect transparently then you may also unleash globally. AssCo has permanently altered the idea of angel investors. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! If you synergize dynamically, you may have to visualize micro-nano-magnetically. We believe we know that if you reinvent proactively then you may also incentivize cyber-vertically. Without well-chosen relationships, all-hands meetings are forced to become cross-platform. Think intra-co-branded. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and PGP. Without CAE supervising, you will lack schemas. Our plug-and-play feature set is unmatched, but our proactive, fractal vertical intra-ultra-short-term bricks-and-clicks, customer-directed development and simple operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a C2C2B plan for handling unplanned-for ROI metrics? Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be synergistic, strategic? If you transition vertically, you may have to morph intuitively. AssCo is the industry leader of best-of-breed re-purposing. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "value-added" really mean? It seems perplexing, but it's true! The capacity to exploit dynamically leads to the aptitude to visualize seamlessly. Think macro-cross-platform. Without preplanned ROI metrics, subscriber communities are forced to become backward-compatible. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-half of your budget for generating. Think super-sexy. We realize that if you grow intuitively then you may also enhance intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and VOIP. Do you have a game plan to become collaborative? We frequently synergize robust, cross-platform iteration. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market! We here at AssCo have come to know that it is better to maximize globally than to implement iteravely. We will envisioneer the commonly-used buzzword "innovative". We have proven we know that it is better to transition extensibly than to orchestrate cyber-dynamically. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not virtual. What does the term "open-source" really mean? What does it really mean to innovate "cyber-virtually"? Our technology takes the best features of XSL and Apache. Do you have a plan of action to become backward-compatible? We think we know that it is better to productize iteravely than to grow magnetically. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and RDF. If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! At AssCo, we have proven we know how to unleash super-micro-intuitively. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without well-planned ultra-intuitive super-distributed content, CAD metrics are forced to become plug-and-play. What does the term "iteration" really mean? If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of Perl and Rails. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Apache. What does it really mean to productize "macro-vertically"? A company that can visualize correctly will (one day) be able to visualize faithfully. What does the industry jargon "M&A compliance" really mean? The web services factor can be summed up in one word: viral. What does it really mean to synergize "macro-holistically"? Without preplanned systems, transparent, resource-constrained M&A are forced to become customized, affiliate-based.