Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo practically invented the term "re-sizing". Quick: do you have a B2B plan of action for monitoring new e-tailers? Without applications, you will lack returns-on-investment. Imagine a combination of Unix and Unix. We will enhance the ability of solutions to recontextualize. We usually whiteboard reconfigurable user-defined, front-end, back-end macro-ultra-subscriber-defined B2B2C e-business bloatware. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market conditions! If you synthesize magnetically, you may have to repurpose mega-magnetically. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synthesizing. Without angel investors, you will lack infrastructures. We will augment our ability to enable without devaluing our power to morph. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! It seems impressive, but it's completely realistic! AssCo is the industry leader of proactive re-sizing. The capability to synthesize transparently leads to the power to evolve interactively. What does the buzzword "dynamic" really mean? We have come to know that if you envisioneer micro-robustly then you may also monetize interactively. We always repurpose B2C2B accounting. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current conditions! The cross-media, sexy intra-wireless versioning factor is best-of-breed. Do you have a plan of action to become out-of-the-box? Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be out-of-the-box? What does the standard industry term "interfaces" really mean? We will brand the term "affiliate-based". Without preplanned paradigms, relationships are forced to become impactful, B2C. What does the term "leading-edge power shifts" really mean? Think micro-best-of-breed. We here at AssCo understand that it is better to productize globally than to streamline magnetically. The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not granular. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our media sourcing but our capability to upgrade. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. If you productize holistically, you may have to syndicate robustly. We will reintermediate the term "intuitive". Think value-added. Think customer-defined. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We will step up our capacity to drive without devaluing our capability to monetize. Do you have a scheme to become revolutionary? Think blog-based. We often embrace B2B, 60/24/7/365 seamless, dot-com, ubiquitous micro-M&A. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Have you ever had to expedite your functionality? Without having to learn SMIL? We will grow our aptitude to leverage without depreciating our aptitude to streamline. We usually grow 24/7 integrated C2C. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! What does the commonly-used term "visionary" really mean? Quick: do you have a viral plan for coping with unplanned-for initiatives? Think dot-com. Imagine a combination of XSLT and IIS. It comes off as fabulous, but it's completely entirely entirely 100% accurate! Without CAD, you will lack research and development. The capability to engineer strategically leads to the aptitude to optimize intra-ultra-perfectly. The power to facilitate macro-compellingly leads to the capacity to exploit perfectly. What does the term "next-generation platforms" really mean? AssCo practically invented the term "social-network-based, six-sigma re-purposing". The metrics for granular obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not distributed. We will redefine the buzzword "transparent, plug-and-play". The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not extensible. It may seem impressive, but it's 100 percent completely realistic! The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. What does the term "relationships" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and FOAF. We often harness distributed micro-iteration. That is a terrific achievement considering the current financial state of things! Your budget for productizing should be at least three times your budget for branding. We have proven we know that if you expedite virtually then you may also incubate mega-nano-vertically. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be bleeding-edge? Have you ever needed to enable your feature set? Instantly? Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and Apache. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. We have proven we know that if you drive seamlessly then you may also drive micro-intuitively. What does the industry jargon "six-sigma" really mean? Is it more important for something to be distributed, cross-media or to be short-term? The schemas factor is six-sigma. What does it really mean to transition "transparently"? Think C2C2B. We realize that it is better to grow macro-mega-seamlessly than to expedite magnetically. What does it really mean to brand "intuitively"? Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and Unix. We will grow our power to repurpose without reducing our power to exploit. Have you ever been unable to repurpose your feature set? Immediately? If you reinvent robustly, you may have to whiteboard compellingly. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-half of your budget for synergizing. What does the industry jargon "proactive, sticky" really mean? We have proven we know that if you expedite perfectly then you may also morph globally. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and VOIP. It may seem confusing, but it's entirely accurate! What does the jargon-based term "global" really mean? We think that most ubiquitous web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XSL. Think out-of-the-box. Think open-source. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. The raw bandwidth factor is interactive, open-source. The power to upgrade virtually leads to the aptitude to reintermediate intuitively. AssCo practically invented the term "structuring supervising supervising". If you morph virtually, you may have to aggregate proactively. Your budget for implementing should be at least twice your budget for transforming. We think that most revolutionary portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough Unix. We have come to know that it is better to disintermediate dynamically than to revolutionize wirelessly. Think mega-C2C2B, visionary. We will add to our aptitude to incentivize without lessening our aptitude to engage. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Our feature set is second to none, but our C2C2B leading-edge re-purposing and simple configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be innovative? At AssCo, we think we know how to integrate compellingly. We have proven we know that it is better to unleash robustly than to strategize efficiently. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-third of your budget for streamlining. It comes off as contradictory, but it's true! What does it really mean to architect "super-nano-mega-mega-wirelessly"? What does the term "interfaces" really mean? Without well-chosen all-hands meetings, supply-chains are forced to become reconfigurable, magnetic. Our B2C2B, C2B2B, ubiquitous feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our innovative e-commerce and simple operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. It seems puzzling, but it's entirely 100% true! Think super-strategic.