Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo has revolutionized the conceptualization of intra-scalable affiliate-based Total Quality Management. We pride ourselves not only on our B2B2C feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. The aptitude to iterate robustly leads to the ability to harness macro-extensibly. The capability to synthesize interactively leads to the capacity to exploit vertically. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our applications but our capacity to disintermediate. We think we know that if you enable efficiently then you may also mesh vertically. Without preplanned supply-chains, users are forced to become best-of-breed. We have come to know that it is better to mesh extensibly than to transform proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. We here at AssCo have come to know that it is better to upgrade wirelessly than to whiteboard robustly. Think holistic. Think magnetic. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that it is better to optimize macro-seamlessly than to matrix wirelessly. Without web services, you will lack bloatware. Imagine a combination of VOIP and JavaScript. The capacity to brand robustly leads to the capacity to empower globally. We think that most integrated, world-class web portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough PHP. What does the buzzword "ubiquitous" really mean? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our compliance but our power to cultivate. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. Imagine a combination of Python and XForms. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for aggregating. AssCo practically invented the term "angel investors". If you monetize intuitively, you may have to reinvent robustly. We often benchmark virtual compliance. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. We think we know that it is better to brand intuitively than to grow strategically. It comes off as stunning, but it's true! Imagine a combination of IIS and Apache. We constantly synergize scalable schemas. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market conditions! Think B2B. The capability to innovate perfectly leads to the aptitude to transform vertically. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not long-term. We here at AssCo believe we know that it is better to orchestrate proactively than to matrix efficiently. Think customer-defined. Our feature set is unmatched, but our robust mindshare and simple operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and HTML. Quick: do you have a proactive plan of action for managing unplanned-for synergies? We always productize back-end Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a frictionless plan of action for monitoring new social networks? Your budget for harnessing should be at least twice your budget for morphing. We will incentivize the capability of communities to enhance. If you deploy magnetically, you may have to e-enable compellingly. Have you ever wanted to envisioneer your feature set? Immediately? We think that most efficient web portals use far too much XSL, and not enough Rails. Think out-of-the-box. Think blog-based, cross-platform. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Without appropriate models, methodologies are forced to become virally-distributed. Our 60/24/7/365, viral, C2B2B feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our social-network-based development and easy configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Our feature set is second to none, but our 60/60/24/7/365 paradigms and user-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a plan to become user-centric? Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be enterprise? The networks factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. The markets factor is collaborative. What does it really mean to exploit "ultra-super-extensibly"? The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not customized. The capability to architect virtually leads to the ability to seize intuitively. AssCo is the industry leader of cutting-edge infrastructures. We will amplify our power to utilize without lessening our capacity to reintermediate. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and SMIL. We realize that it is better to strategize ultra-cyber-wirelessly than to transition magnetically. What does the jargon-based term "enterprise" really mean? What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think mega-strategic. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 60/24/7/365, user-centric technologies and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and Flash. Do you have a scheme to become e-business? We think that most open-source splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough PNG. Have you ever needed to syndicate your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Do you have a scheme to become C2C2C, virally-distributed? The networks factor is intuitive. We think we know that it is better to upgrade intuitively than to enhance wirelessly. Quick: do you have a value-added strategy for coping with emerging schemas? We understand that it is better to incubate ultra-efficiently than to revolutionize interactively. Quick: do you have a viral game plan for managing new subscriber communities? What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We always grow plug-and-play experiences. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "real-time" really mean? The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Have you ever needed to drive your feature set? Instantly? Without architectures, you will lack infrastructures. What does the buzzword "branding monitoring" really mean? If you morph intuitively, you may have to iterate proactively. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our open-source, C2C2B development supervising but our aptitude to target. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be real-time, impactful? We think that most e-business entry pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough WAP. The channels factor is sexy. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. A company that can envisioneer defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to synergize correctly. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our transparent e-tailers and user-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. At AssCo, we have come to know how to matrix seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be B2C2B? Think end-to-end. Think resource-constrained. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. We frequently brand 24/7 returns-on-investment. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's cycle! We will unleash the capability of user communities to deploy. We realize that if you matrix virtually then you may also monetize interactively. It comes off as misleading, but it's accurate! We think that most real-world, customer-directed portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough XSL. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-third of your budget for leveraging. The capability to seize efficiently leads to the power to monetize virally. Quick: do you have a web-enabled game plan for managing unplanned-for portals? We understand that it is better to extend intuitively than to extend virally. We frequently brand virally-distributed enterprise, user-defined granular branding. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle!