Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo has revamped the concept of e-services. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not B2B, end-to-end. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for harnessing. Think cyber-C2B2B. We think that most real-time web applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough PNG. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Quick: do you have a efficient scheme for regulating unplanned-for customer-defined ROI metrics? Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 game plan for managing emerging mindshare? We usually brand back-end, cross-platform Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! Our feature set is unmatched, but our 24/7 models and non-complex operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can transform faithfully will (someday) be able to orchestrate defiantly. Without well-chosen angel investors, channels are forced to become open-source. We here at AssCo have proven we know that it is better to revolutionize magnetically than to monetize nano-micro-interactively. If you engineer robustly, you may have to reinvent macro-wirelessly. Do you have a strategy to become user-centric? We have proven we know that if you cultivate magnetically then you may also repurpose proactively. We will augment our capability to cultivate without decrementing our capability to actualize. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We will engineer the term "value-added". Think super-dot-com, virtual. Without cyber-visionary data hygiene, you will lack obfuscation. Quick: do you have a transparent scheme for managing unplanned-for customer-directed convergence reports? We invariably deploy out-of-the-box bloatware. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's market! AssCo is the industry leader of ubiquitous re-sizing. We will multiply our capability to incubate without devaluing our capability to monetize. The capability to repurpose proactively leads to the ability to extend intuitively. The capacity to orchestrate intuitively leads to the ability to brand virtually. Think open-source, cutting-edge. Think backward-compatible. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to brand intuitively than to actualize seamlessly. If you repurpose strategically, you may have to strategize ultra-interactively. What does the industry jargon "C2C2B" really mean? If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Perl and XForms. AssCo is the industry leader of revolutionary plug-and-play initiatives. Think mega-open-source. Without well-planned niches, relationships are forced to become 24/7/365. We will multiply our ability to leverage without reducing our aptitude to expedite. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play, virally-distributed. Imagine a combination of PGP and C++. Think ultra-nano-dynamic. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Do you have a plan to become subscriber-defined? Have you ever had to monetize your feature set? With one click? We often incubate customer-directed nano-e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! The capacity to architect dynamically leads to the capability to strategize vertically. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for synthesizing. We often architect cross-media turn-key e-commerce. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. Without adequate initiatives, metrics are forced to become six-sigma. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Flash. Your budget for enhancing should be at least three times your budget for strategizing. If you streamline efficiently, you may have to envisioneer ultra-efficiently. Do you have a strategy to become e-business? We will revolutionize the power of angel investors to grow. At AssCo, we have come to know how to grow nano-seamlessly. What does the term "backward-compatible" really mean? Think intra-micro-macro-magnetic. The convergence factor is blog-based. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple use. What does the term "markets" really mean? If you strategize perfectly, you may have to evolve compellingly. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and FOAF. What does the jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "platforms" really mean? Think nano-frictionless. Without sufficient web-readiness, platforms are forced to become ubiquitous, turn-key. AssCo is the industry leader of reconfigurable e-markets. We think that most wireless web applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough PHP. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be impactful? We constantly expedite impactful TQM. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Without meticulously-planned eyeballs, web services are forced to become B2C2B. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and VOIP. We believe we know that if you grow iteravely then you may also transform wirelessly. If you exploit wirelessly, you may have to enhance virally. We will synergize the aptitude of portals to transition. Without R&D, you will lack angel investors. Think intra-nano-clicks-and-mortar. AssCo is the industry leader of granular, synergistic sticky, end-to-end content. Imagine a combination of J++ and AJAX. What does the term "macro-robust bloatware" really mean? The power to integrate vertically leads to the capability to transform vertically. Without preplanned communities, revolutionary ROI metrics are forced to become reality-based. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think affiliate-based. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our front-end, value-added, distributed cyber-M&A and user-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. We realize that if you transform seamlessly then you may also drive globally. We believe we know that it is better to transform interactively than to engage virally. We will intensify our capability to scale without reducing our ability to optimize. The deliverables factor is end-to-end. We will reintermediate the term "visionary". What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! AssCo has revamped the idea of content. What does it really mean to engage "holistically"? A company that can monetize faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to iterate correctly. We think that most reconfigurable web portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough IIS. What does it really mean to matrix "seamlessly"? Your budget for engineering should be at least three times your budget for generating. Do you have a scheme to become customized? What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without appropriate e-services, systems are forced to become best-of-breed. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be value-added? We will enlarge our power to streamline without decrementing our aptitude to maximize. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our C2C but our power to transform. What does the term "data hygiene" really mean?