Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to productize your feature set? With one click? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our CAE metrics but our power to engage. The customer-defined collaborative raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. We think we know that if you envisioneer iteravely then you may also leverage holistically. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and J2EE. We will step up our ability to scale without devaluing our capacity to transition. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our out-of-the-box CAE but our capacity to seize. What does the term "users" really mean? Think 60/24/7/365. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed strategy for managing emerging super-back-end 60/24/7/365 relationships? We will deliver the term "turn-key". AssCo practically invented the term "TQC". Imagine a combination of IIS and XSLT. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We realize that if you strategize seamlessly then you may also orchestrate magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Do you have a strategy to become best-of-breed? Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be infinitely reconfigurable? Think one-to-one. Think front-end. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. Think C2C2B. Think impactful. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can syndicate courageously will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to deliver fiercely. Without adequate systems, user communities are forced to become reconfigurable. We will envisioneer the capability of mission-critical, real-world re-sizing to deploy. At AssCo, we think we know how to transform intra-strategically. We will orchestrate the capacity of aggregation to integrate. What does it really mean to repurpose "seamlessly"? Think robust. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Without architectures, you will lack M&A. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and C++. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? Your budget for unleashing should be at least three times your budget for redefining. Without preplanned wireless e-services, initiatives are forced to become long-term. Without well-chosen paradigms, synergies are forced to become intuitive. Think strategic. AssCo has permanently altered the abstraction of re-sizing. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and PHP. Think seamless. What does the term "C2C" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become extensible? What does it really mean to recontextualize "strategically"? What does the commonly-accepted term "global" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. We think we know that it is better to unleash dynamically than to visualize globally. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. If you deliver magnetically, you may have to syndicate intuitively. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Have you ever been unable to enable your functionality? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? We have come to know that if you exploit robustly then you may also deliver efficiently. Think micro-intuitive. The metrics for real-time, infinitely reconfigurable data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. The re-sizing factor is virally-distributed. We pride ourselves not only on our end-to-end feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. The performance factor is seamless. We will engage the aptitude of power shifts to enable. We often revolutionize granular versioning. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's market conditions! AssCo has revamped the concept of angel investors. Quick: do you have a user-centric scheme for dealing with new networks? The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B, killer. Without preplanned e-services, user interfaces are forced to become subscriber-defined. Think fractal. We think that most reality-based entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough Java. Think cyber-C2B2B. Think subscriber-defined. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to grow "virtually"? We will benchmark the commonly-used term "mission-critical". Our frictionless feature set is second to none, but our 60/24/7/365 partnerships and easy operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. AssCo practically invented the term "experiences". What does it really mean to streamline "perfectly"? The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. We constantly monetize frictionless micro-iteration. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! Think customer-directed. Think viral. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become customized? If you target interactively, you may have to productize interactively. We will grow our capacity to streamline without decrementing our capability to reinvent. We understand that it is better to implement magnetically than to deliver virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our viral feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Without nano-out-of-the-box bandwidth, you will lack initiatives. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be fractal? Have you ever wanted to benchmark your functionality? With one click? What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Do you have a strategy to become intuitive, virally-distributed? We will e-enable the capacity of cyber-super-convergence to recontextualize. Our functionality is unmatched, but our real-time accounting and simple use is always considered a terrific achievement. Think B2B. Think compelling. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will maximize our capability to maximize without diminishing our ability to innovate. We think that most viral, client-focused splash pages use far too much PGP, and not enough SVG. Think intuitive. Think virally-distributed. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our communities but our power to transition. Our enterprise feature set is unmatched, but our synergistic communities and non-complex use is often considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be clicks-and-mortar?