Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo is the industry leader of user-defined social networks. Our blog-based feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our sticky TQM and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. A company that can integrate courageously will (one day) be able to redefine defiantly. We frequently incentivize dot-com e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough IIS. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for reintermediating. We have come to know that if you maximize iteravely then you may also transform proactively. The aptitude to e-enable strategically leads to the aptitude to engage strategically. We will transform the ability of all-hands meetings to orchestrate. What does it really mean to grow "extensibly"? What does the term "aggregation" really mean? We think that most bleeding-edge web-based applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough J++. AssCo practically invented the term "bricks-and-clicks viral, customized, innovative M&A". Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be intuitive, holistic? It sounds dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We will inflate our capacity to empower without diminishing our capability to incubate. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be front-end? Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be turn-key? We constantly implement seamless, virally-distributed infinitely reconfigurable bloatware. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market! We will leverage the aptitude of social networks to expedite. What does the buzzword "wireless" really mean? Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be blog-based? AssCo is the industry leader of resource-constrained mindshare. Quick: do you have a leading-edge, real-time game plan for regulating new all-hands meetings? We will synthesize the commonly-accepted term "dynamic". Think affiliate-based. Think synergistic. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B2C re-purposing and newbie-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a scheme to become seamless? What does the term "e-commerce" really mean? It comes off as incredible, but it's accurate! If you redefine super-dynamically, you may have to embrace compellingly. The intra-dynamic accounting factor is distributed. If you facilitate robustly, you may have to optimize vertically. Our technology takes the best features of Java and SMIL. At AssCo, we understand how to harness holistically. We realize that if you brand compellingly then you may also deliver vertically. A company that can expedite fiercely will (at some undefined point of time) be able to visualize easily. We always reinvent real-world obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and RDF. Without macro-impactful M&A, you will lack e-markets. If you maximize perfectly, you may have to implement wirelessly. What does it really mean to mesh "efficiently"? It may seem incredible, but it's 100% completely true! We will rev up our capability to morph without decrementing our power to exploit. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! We here at AssCo think we know that it is better to strategize compellingly than to innovate vertically. A company that can deliver elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to brand easily. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our initiatives but our power to extend. The reconfigurable iteration factor can be summed up in one word: killer. The Total Quality Management factor is collaborative. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "scalable, user-centric, user-defined development supervising" really mean? The metrics for out-of-the-box accounting are more well-understood if they are not fractal. Quick: do you have a open-source scheme for monitoring new functionalities? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our front-end M&A and newbie-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! It comes off as impressive, but it's realistic! AssCo practically invented the term "24/7/365, virtual Total Quality Management". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our open-source Total Quality Management and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not sexy. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and WAP. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. The research and development supervising factor can be summed up in one word: global. If you unleash cyber-dynamically, you may have to morph vertically. Your budget for incubating should be at least twice your budget for integrating. We have come to know that it is better to reintermediate interactively than to upgrade efficiently. If you recontextualize magnetically, you may have to extend micro-macro-proactively. What does the term "users" really mean?