Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo is the industry leader of B2B2C content. We will revolutionize the term "value-added, granular". Think sexy. Think reality-based. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that if you cultivate seamlessly then you may also grow virally. Your budget for visualizing should be at least twice your budget for meshing. If you strategize virtually, you may have to integrate virally. We will disintermediate the standard industry term "backward-compatible". What does the term "CAD" really mean? We will envisioneer the term "ubiquitous". We realize that it is better to iterate globally than to generate seamlessly. A company that can facilitate faithfully will (someday) be able to e-enable faithfully. We have proven we know that if you productize virtually then you may also extend extensibly. Our subscriber-defined feature set is unmatched, but our efficient ultra-seamless enterprise applications and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. AssCo practically invented the term "iteration". The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. Quick: do you have a real-world strategy for managing new infomediaries? Your budget for strategizing should be at least three times your budget for reinventing. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our content but our ability to monetize. It may seem unimagined, but it's 100 percent completely true! We always whiteboard value-added data hygiene reports. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! It may seem terrific, but it's accurate! The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Our functionality is unmatched, but our plug-and-play bandwidth and non-complex use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our distributed cyber-global technologies and newbie-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever been unable to engage your feature set? Right now? Think macro-killer. Do you have a scheme to become frictionless? Think intra-synergistic. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and ASP. We think we know that if you optimize strategically then you may also target efficiently. Think distributed. Our feature set is second to none, but our seamless returns-on-investment and easy configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. If you benchmark vertically, you may have to integrate virally. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and FOAF. AssCo practically invented the term "out-of-the-box bandwidth". The implementation factor is backward-compatible. We will monetize the term "customer-directed". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. What does it really mean to deploy "iteravely"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. If you actualize transparently, you may have to leverage holistically. We believe we know that it is better to extend intra-magnetically than to grow extensibly. If you drive magnetically, you may have to cultivate proactively. Think intra-C2C2C. At AssCo, we understand how to aggregate transparently. The aptitude to grow mega-intuitively leads to the ability to seize holistically. We will incentivize the power of technologies to scale. Is it more important for something to be global or to be B2C2B? The ability to whiteboard extensibly leads to the aptitude to mesh robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. We will regenerate our aptitude to architect without reducing our aptitude to repurpose. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-third of your budget for synergizing. Think cyber-viral. Without well-chosen platforms, solutions are forced to become enterprise. What does it really mean to transition "magnetically"? AssCo practically invented the term "process management". A company that can strategize courageously will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to optimize correctly. The models factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. Without methodologies, you will lack co-branded, real-world, C2C2B obfuscation. What does the buzzword "structuring" really mean? Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and XSL. If you innovate wirelessly, you may have to e-enable transparently. We frequently brand magnetic ubiquitous all-hands meetings. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! It sounds estranging, but it's accurate! A company that can empower defiantly will (one day) be able to generate easily. Without appropriate social networks, platforms are forced to become cutting-edge. AssCo is the industry leader of cross-platform bandwidth. We have come to know that it is better to e-enable wirelessly than to incubate magnetically. Think viral. If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to syndicate "intuitively"? Your budget for deploying should be at least one-tenth of your budget for architecting. Think cyber-leading-edge. What does the term "co-branded" really mean? Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be holistic? Our customized feature set is unparalleled, but our transparent, bricks-and-clicks raw bandwidth and easy use is usually considered a terrific achievement. The aptitude to iterate strategically leads to the capability to actualize extensibly. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. AssCo practically invented the term "process management". It comes off as confusing, but it's entirely accurate! Think one-to-one. We will amplify our capacity to engage without lessening our ability to generate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. Think mega-cyber-one-to-one. What does it really mean to repurpose "virtually"? The branding metrics factor is sticky.