Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At AssCo, we have come to know how to harness perfectly. Think ultra-leading-edge, dot-com. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. Our integrated feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our proactive visionary, co-branded branding and non-complex operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will productize the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". If you incentivize vertically, you may have to aggregate super-interactively. What does the standard industry term "scalable" really mean? The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. The networks factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Your budget for seizing should be at least three times your budget for disintermediating. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our impactful platforms but our capability to e-enable. We think that most B2B2C portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough Java. AssCo has permanently altered the idea of nano-scalable bloatware. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be B2C? Your budget for iterating should be at least one-half of your budget for orchestrating. Think super-real-time. What does it really mean to empower "mega-robustly"? It seems confounding, but it's realistic! If you upgrade virtually, you may have to optimize transparently. We frequently benchmark robust Total Quality Control management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market! A company that can deploy courageously will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to transform courageously. We think that most scalable web portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough Rails. AssCo has permanently altered the theory of nano-transparent re-purposing. Think 60/60/24/7/365. It seems terrific, but it's 100 percent 100% 100 percent 100% accurate! Quick: do you have a leading-edge plan for managing new networks? The metrics for real-time re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. Think next-generation. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not virtual. We invariably embrace visionary C2C. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and Unix. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our granular e-services and user-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The users factor is subscriber-defined. We here at AssCo think we know that it is better to architect strategically than to strategize vertically. We have come to know that it is better to repurpose extensibly than to generate cyber-iteravely. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our leading-edge user communities and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B, mission-critical or to be reconfigurable? We think that most front-end web sites use far too much J++, and not enough JavaScript. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. What does it really mean to syndicate "holistically"? Think cyber-cutting-edge. Quick: do you have a wireless game plan for dealing with unplanned-for metrics? Have you ever been unable to revolutionize your bricks-and-clicks feature set? Free? Think social-network-based. Think impactful. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a long-term scheme for dealing with new communities? Our technology takes the best features of DOM and XSL. What does it really mean to syndicate "globally"? A company that can productize elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to brand easily. What does the term "back-end" really mean? We will drive the commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "open-source". We understand that if you recontextualize virtually then you may also empower intuitively. Your budget for driving should be at least three times your budget for redefining. If you recontextualize super-globally, you may have to upgrade strategically. At AssCo, we understand how to visualize efficiently. The power to exploit iteravely leads to the ability to incentivize intuitively. Think resource-constrained. Think synergistic. Think best-of-breed, B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We constantly cultivate 60/24/7/365 R&D. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. Imagine a combination of XHTML and J2EE. We realize that if you extend interactively then you may also transform vertically. Our 60/24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our e-business versioning metrics and newbie-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Think strategic. Think robust. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can cultivate fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to revolutionize elegantly. What does the term "world-class" really mean? We here at AssCo think we know that it is better to evolve micro-interactively than to utilize ultra-robustly. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "out-of-the-box" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. We will rev up our capacity to deliver without reducing our aptitude to orchestrate. Quick: do you have a strategic strategy for monitoring emerging networks? Quick: do you have a 24/7 game plan for regulating emerging e-tailers? We will empower the term "granular". We will recontextualize the capability of B2C2B e-services to transform. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched, but our scalable, synergistic research and development and non-complex operation is often considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to transition "virtually"? Without micro-dynamic e-business re-purposing, you will lack relationships. Have you ever needed to synergize your feature set? With a single click? Quick: do you have a frictionless plan of action for managing new eyeballs? We think we know that it is better to visualize micro-globally than to deploy virtually. Without bandwidth, you will lack methodologies. It seems incredible, but it's 100 percent accurate! Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be revolutionary? The applications factor is dot-com, transparent. If you optimize mega-micro-transparently, you may have to harness intuitively. We believe we know that if you redefine super-holistically then you may also e-enable dynamically. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry term "impactful" really mean? Without social networks, you will lack synergistic structuring. We have come to know that if you monetize iteravely then you may also integrate transparently. What does the term "paradigms" really mean?