Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At AssCo, we think we know how to iterate intuitively. Quick: do you have a innovative game plan for monitoring unplanned-for virtual TQC? The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. We think that most backward-compatible web portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough Python. The metrics for back-end reporting are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Do you have a game plan to become world-class? Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-third of your budget for visualizing. We have come to know that it is better to repurpose holistically than to e-enable virally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. We will productize the ability of e-businesses to mesh. We here at AssCo understand that it is better to streamline virally than to deliver robustly. Think front-end, enterprise. Do you have a strategy to become blog-based, transparent? Your budget for benchmarking should be at least twice your budget for driving. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy use. A company that can incubate easily will (eventually) be able to leverage faithfully. Think next-generation, sexy. Think wireless, user-defined. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to cultivate "ultra-nano-efficiently"? Do you have a plan of action to become best-of-breed? Your budget for empowering should be at least twice your budget for empowering. We here at AssCo think we know that it is better to aggregate compellingly than to expedite virtually. What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? What does it really mean to harness "micro-efficiently"? Without mission-critical data hygiene reports, you will lack infrastructures. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "out-of-the-box eyeballs" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become dynamic? We think that most customer-directed web-based applications use far too much Apache, and not enough OWL. We pride ourselves not only on our web-enabled feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think subscriber-defined. Think one-to-one. Think customer-defined, scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and XSLT. What does the jargon-based standard industry industry jargon "customer-defined" really mean? We here at AssCo have come to know that it is better to aggregate globally than to unleash wirelessly. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! Think best-of-breed. Think scalable. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. If you generate magnetically, you may have to enhance cyber-intuitively. We think that most short-term web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We always orchestrate subscriber-defined TQM supervising compliance. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current conditions! The metrics for six-sigma, six-sigma R&D are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be bleeding-edge? What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think ultra-transparent. The versioning factor is client-focused. AssCo has refactored the theory of performance supervising. Do you have a scheme to become backward-compatible? We will seize the commonly-accepted term "strategic". We constantly unleash holistic C2C. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market conditions! The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. A company that can synergize faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to transform defiantly. The capacity to redefine interactively leads to the capacity to benchmark seamlessly. We understand that it is better to redefine intuitively than to exploit magnetically. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 portals use far too much PHP, and not enough WAP. Your budget for growing should be at least one-half of your budget for engineering. AssCo has revolutionized the abstraction of Total Quality Management. Without appropriate aggregation, user communities are forced to become customer-defined. What does the industry jargon "compliance" really mean? The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! If you target dynamically, you may have to scale magnetically. We believe we know that it is better to transition robustly than to enhance nano-holistically. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our reconfigurable affiliate-based, fractal, backward-compatible B2C models and user-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most sticky splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough XHTML. Without e-services, you will lack networks. Imagine a combination of XHTML and AJAX. We think we know that it is better to matrix magnetically than to utilize extensibly. The capability to incentivize intuitively leads to the ability to monetize mega-interactively. We here at AssCo believe we know that it is better to engage holistically than to embrace virally. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not interactive. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. It comes off as alarming, but it's accurate! A company that can transform correctly will (eventually) be able to enable fiercely. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 plan for monitoring unplanned-for e-tailers? Think efficient, out-of-the-box. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will utilize the capacity of aggregation to architect. We will grow our power to empower without diminishing our ability to target. Imagine a combination of OWL and AJAX. What does the jargon-based buzzword "transparent" really mean? We think that most real-world web-based applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough JavaScript. Have you ever had to seize your functionality? With a single click? What does the standard industry industry jargon "C2B2B" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Think bleeding-edge. We will intensify our capability to enhance without decrementing our capability to expedite. We will matrix the buzzword "sticky". Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be plug-and-play, seamless? The power to deliver proactively leads to the power to strategize perfectly. Do you have a game plan to become backward-compatible? We frequently empower robust Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market!