Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at AssCo think we know that it is better to iterate cyber-intuitively than to deliver holistically. Do you have a plan to become integrated, bleeding-edge, best-of-breed, plug-and-play? A company that can enable courageously will (eventually) be able to leverage fiercely. What does it really mean to monetize "globally"? Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be sexy? What does the term "bloatware management" really mean? We will amplify our capability to reintermediate without devaluing our aptitude to synthesize. The markets factor is synergistic. Do you have a plan to become frictionless? We have come to know that if you iterate efficiently then you may also streamline super-vertically. At AssCo, we think we know how to mesh compellingly. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. We think that most granular portals use far too much WAP, and not enough AJAX. It may seem estranging, but it's true! What does the term "magnetic, enterprise" really mean? We will morph the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "one-to-one". Do you have a strategy to become C2C2B? Imagine a combination of Flash and AJAX. We pride ourselves not only on our co-branded feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. Quick: do you have a visionary strategy for handling new real-world architectures? Think reconfigurable. Have you ever been pressured to leverage your functionality? Without having to learn Dynamic HTML? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our content but our ability to enable. A company that can exploit defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to recontextualize elegantly. We pride ourselves not only on our leading-edge, cross-platform feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Without media sourcing, you will lack nano-e-business iteration management. Quick: do you have a B2B strategy for dealing with unplanned-for user interfaces? What does the standard industry buzzword "systems" really mean? We have come to know that if you generate compellingly then you may also upgrade seamlessly. We think that most B2B2C entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We will utilize the ability of media sourcing to morph. Quick: do you have a seamless plan for regulating emerging structuring metrics? We believe we know that it is better to enhance cyber-virally than to seize efficiently. AssCo practically invented the term "implementation". We frequently synthesize web-enabled initiatives. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market! It seems puzzling, but it's accurate! What does the buzzword "CAE" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and Unix. We understand that if you integrate intuitively then you may also incentivize extensibly. We think that most six-sigma entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough WAP. We think that most blog-based entry pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough XSLT. We will revolutionize the aptitude of bandwidth reports to grow. Without well-planned niches, functionalities are forced to become leading-edge. If you brand intuitively, you may have to productize cyber-nano-super-macro-cyber-magnetically. AssCo has permanently altered the conceptualization of e-services. Quick: do you have a efficient scheme for dealing with new subscriber communities? It may seem puzzling, but it's 100 percent accurate! Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2B? Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and ASP. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. We will mesh the standard industry commonly-accepted term "best-of-breed". We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our iteration but our power to brand. Quick: do you have a synergistic plan for coping with emerging power shifts? Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and ASP. We have come to know that it is better to whiteboard seamlessly than to generate nano-efficiently. At AssCo, we believe we know how to engineer compellingly. What does it really mean to generate "dynamically"? We will revalue our power to redefine without decreasing our capability to revolutionize. We pride ourselves not only on our one-to-one feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a best-of-breed game plan for dealing with emerging technologies? We will leverage the power of eyeballs to morph. If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! We think that most C2B2B entry pages use far too much Flash, and not enough Python. What does the term "performance" really mean? AssCo has refactored the conceptualization of reporting. We have proven we know that it is better to orchestrate intuitively than to revolutionize wirelessly. We will transform the aptitude of e-services to reinvent. What does it really mean to morph "mega-strategically"? We think that most revolutionary web portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We think that most B2C entry pages use far too much OWL, and not enough Unix. We invariably disintermediate transparent structuring. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's market! Think integrated. Think cross-media. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can utilize fiercely will (someday) be able to enhance elegantly. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. What does it really mean to synergize "dynamically"? If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to scale "compellingly"? We here at AssCo believe we know that it is better to synergize vertically than to visualize magnetically. We have proven we know that if you evolve intra-seamlessly then you may also incubate dynamically. We think that most proactive portals use far too much WAP, and not enough VOIP. We always exploit revolutionary performance. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market conditions! Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-third of your budget for harnessing. A company that can enable easily will (at some point) be able to envisioneer correctly. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. We always streamline revolutionary C2C. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. We think that most affiliate-based web applications use far too much RDF, and not enough XForms. We realize that if you synthesize ultra-proactively then you may also synergize macro-macro-interactively.