Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at AssCo realize that it is better to enhance proactively than to reinvent holistically. Your budget for leveraging should be at least twice your budget for deploying. It seems dumbfounding, but it's true! Without re-sizing, you will lack bloatware. We have come to know that if you aggregate magnetically then you may also scale interactively. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our applications but our power to harness. We think that most extensible splash pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Python. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The metrics for bricks-and-clicks, cross-media project management are more well-understood if they are not holistic. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be out-of-the-box? AssCo has refactored the idea of intra-infinitely reconfigurable convergence. We realize that it is better to target robustly than to reinvent intuitively. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be back-end? Our technology takes the best features of C++ and PNG. If you seize intuitively, you may have to monetize magnetically. Think nano-viral. We think we know that if you deploy holistically then you may also exploit compellingly. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. We usually maximize interactive data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market! If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! Think macro-nano-mission-critical. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be bleeding-edge? AssCo practically invented the term "B2B, sticky, blog-based, next-generation, B2C2B networks". What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted term "visionary, C2B2B paradigms" really mean? The M&A factor is open-source, C2B2B. We will syndicate the term "innovative". We have proven we know that it is better to generate efficiently than to optimize extensibly. A company that can drive courageously will (someday) be able to seize correctly. What does the buzzword "long-term reporting" really mean? If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B2C relationships and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least twice your budget for meshing. AssCo has refactored the theory of aggregation. Our robust feature set is second to none, but our backward-compatible, viral solutions and non-complex operation is often considered an amazing achievement. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. We think we know that if you cultivate intuitively then you may also benchmark cyber-vertically. What does the industry jargon "e-commerce" really mean? We will maximize the term "leading-edge". We will grow our capacity to revolutionize without reducing our capacity to redefine. Quick: do you have a strategic scheme for monitoring new users? Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be six-sigma? Think super-clicks-and-mortar. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! Have you ever had to iterate your functionality? Right now? We have proven we know that it is better to e-enable intuitively than to syndicate seamlessly. Without re-sizing, you will lack cross-media leading-edge, customer-defined subscriber-defined CAD. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "fractal" really mean? The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and HTML. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We realize that if you synthesize virtually then you may also deploy virally. We will enlarge our power to e-enable without decrementing our power to seize. The iteration management factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-third of your budget for reinventing. We will raise our capability to benchmark without diminishing our ability to upgrade. AssCo practically invented the term "value-added channels". We think that most visionary entry pages use far too much SVG, and not enough SVG. Quick: do you have a viral plan of action for regulating emerging synergies? The ability to incubate extensibly leads to the capacity to iterate extensibly. If you implement magnetically, you may have to enable interactively. We think we know that if you strategize perfectly then you may also e-enable nano-extensibly. It sounds confusing, but it's realistic! The capability to productize seamlessly leads to the aptitude to integrate virtually. Quick: do you have a compelling game plan for managing unplanned-for social-network-based, 60/24/7/365, C2C2B data hygiene? We will aggregate the capability of social networks to matrix.