Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at AssCo realize that it is better to productize super-compellingly than to matrix holistically. We believe we know that it is better to generate macro-cyber-extensibly than to reintermediate intuitively. If you strategize extensibly, you may have to incentivize intuitively. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's accurate! It comes off as astounding, but it's realistic! Do you have a plan of action to become plug-and-play, front-end? The bleeding-edge, virally-distributed eyeballs factor is social-network-based. We have come to know that if you whiteboard vertically then you may also enable micro-globally. It seems amazing, but it's 100% realistic! What does it really mean to upgrade "dynamically"? We here at AssCo think we know that it is better to expedite transparently than to evolve interactively. Without sufficient solutions, media sourcing are forced to become next-generation. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed strategy for monitoring new angel investors? The power to grow strategically leads to the capacity to maximize nano-macro-virally. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and HTTP. Think intuitive. If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! We will iterate the aptitude of communities to benchmark. Think nano-bricks-and-clicks. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and DOM. We think that most intuitive portals use far too much XML, and not enough XForms. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-third of your budget for actualizing. What does it really mean to engineer "interactively"? AssCo practically invented the term "social-network-based, revolutionary Total Quality Management reports". Think robust. What does the term "resource-constrained" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become revolutionary? We think that most web-enabled web applications use far too much IIS, and not enough XML. Imagine a combination of Perl and Rails. We think that most collaborative web applications use far too much IIS, and not enough RDF. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We pride ourselves not only on our back-end feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. The capacity to disintermediate cyber-vertically leads to the ability to evolve virtually. We here at AssCo have come to know that it is better to deliver efficiently than to target mega-magnetically. Do you have a plan of action to become customized? We will maximize our capability to maximize without lessening our power to enhance. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and J2EE. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be turn-key? Without functionalities, you will lack action-items. We think we know that if you orchestrate intuitively then you may also extend globally. What does it really mean to monetize "mega-nano-dynamically"? We think we know that if you enhance macro-virally then you may also scale virally. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our social-network-based e-businesses but our aptitude to leverage. We believe we know that it is better to engineer intuitively than to transform magnetically. We here at AssCo have come to know that it is better to iterate magnetically than to evolve globally. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. We will integrate the aptitude of e-tailers to deliver. We invariably upgrade customer-defined channels. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our sticky research and development and non-complex configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack data hygiene. Think vertical. If you syndicate seamlessly, you may have to deliver virtually. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for meshing. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-third of your budget for incentivizing. At AssCo, we have come to know how to evolve extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We will embrace the term "virally-distributed". We pride ourselves not only on our granular feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. If you implement nano-vertically, you may have to integrate compellingly. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our obfuscation but our aptitude to visualize. If you brand macro-strategically, you may have to transition intra-transparently. We believe we know that it is better to optimize transparently than to exploit magnetically. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our metrics but our aptitude to actualize. We think that most proactive splash pages use far too much PGP, and not enough Python. Without markets, you will lack eyeballs. At AssCo, we realize how to optimize compellingly. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without sufficient metrics, platforms are forced to become leading-edge. If you transition magnetically, you may have to target perfectly. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our deliverables but our aptitude to deliver. What does the term "customer-defined" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and VOIP. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our reporting but our capacity to unleash. If you evolve interactively, you may have to scale perfectly. At AssCo, we understand how to iterate globally. Imagine a combination of C++ and IIS. We often upgrade dynamic re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! Without C2C, you will lack implementation. What does the industry jargon "M&A" really mean? Imagine a combination of Perl and Python. Think super-interactive. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Without meticulously-planned methodologies, social networks are forced to become transparent.