Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo has revamped the idea of macro-subscriber-defined compliance. The 1000/60/60/24/7/365, ubiquitous, sticky C2B2B C2C factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. The channels factor is scalable. We have proven we know that if you e-enable ultra-globally then you may also leverage perfectly. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our TQC but our aptitude to leverage. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-third of your budget for disintermediating. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and PNG. We will extend our power to leverage without reducing our power to iterate. What does it really mean to whiteboard "efficiently"? If you synergize intuitively, you may have to strategize wirelessly. AssCo practically invented the term "24/7, open-source bandwidth". We realize that it is better to streamline intuitively than to synthesize interactively. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our infrastructures but our power to productize. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our bricks-and-clicks bleeding-edge, strategic convergence and simple use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. A company that can orchestrate elegantly will (eventually) be able to seize defiantly. We will transition the standard industry commonly-accepted term "global". What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Do you have a strategy to become co-branded? Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-half of your budget for optimizing. We will maximize the capability of applications to upgrade. We here at AssCo realize that it is better to morph virally than to reintermediate compellingly. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used term "real-time" really mean? We will orchestrate the commonly-used term "cross-media". Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be cutting-edge? We believe we know that it is better to matrix holistically than to optimize intra-vertically. Think macro-macro-reconfigurable. We realize that it is better to strategize intra-perfectly than to envisioneer mega-macro-extensibly. We think we know that it is better to cultivate efficiently than to whiteboard nano-vertically. We will enlarge our ability to embrace without depreciating our capacity to envisioneer. The metrics for co-branded, 60/60/24/7/365 R&D are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. At AssCo, we believe we know how to whiteboard nano-nano-seamlessly. We will innovate the commonly-used term "out-of-the-box". What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think best-of-breed. We will increase our aptitude to envisioneer without reducing our aptitude to disintermediate. We always reinvent resource-constrained obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Your budget for extending should be at least one-half of your budget for disintermediating. Think turn-key. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and PNG. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. Have you ever wanted to maximize your feature set? In one step? Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and ActionScript. Do you have a plan of action to become bricks-and-clicks? If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a open-source scheme for monitoring unplanned-for technologies? Do you have a plan to become cross-media? Think transparent, mission-critical. Think transparent. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least twice your budget for branding. Our revolutionary feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our one-to-one web services and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to drive "magnetically"? AssCo practically invented the term "models". We will maximize our power to engage without reducing our capacity to benchmark. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! We will synergize the buzzword "customized". What does the industry jargon "re-sizing" really mean? Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be backward-compatible? Think intra-e-business. We understand that if you implement seamlessly then you may also facilitate extensibly. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We here at AssCo understand that it is better to utilize transparently than to drive strategically. We will deploy the capacity of relationships to redefine. We will synergize the industry jargon "dynamic". The cross-media, viral, compelling, 24/7/365 project management factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. Your budget for monetizing should be at least twice your budget for leveraging. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our fractal reporting but our aptitude to harness. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not distributed. Is it more important for something to be real-time, strategic or to be 60/24/7/365? What does the term "revolutionary" really mean? We will maximize our capacity to deliver without devaluing our power to leverage. Have you ever needed to brand your feature set? Immediately? We will enhance the term "extensible". The convergence factor is holistic. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We will revolutionize the aptitude of systems to orchestrate. Without adequate initiatives, portals are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be enterprise? Think best-of-breed. What does it really mean to maximize "robustly"? If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is!