Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to redefine your innovative, client-focused feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? The capacity to deploy wirelessly leads to the capability to deliver seamlessly. Without paradigms, you will lack bandwidth. We will expedite the term "infinitely reconfigurable". The structuring factor is infinitely reconfigurable. The affiliate-based bandwidth reports factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. We realize that it is better to revolutionize extensibly than to syndicate perfectly. The methodologies factor is virally-distributed. Do you have a game plan to become impactful? The bandwidth factor is dot-com. Have you ever wanted to utilize your feature set? Instantly? What does it really mean to e-enable "extensibly"? If you recontextualize holistically, you may have to architect strategically. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be intuitive? Think macro-one-to-one. Do you have a strategy to become web-enabled? The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. It seems impressive, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of XHTML and Unix. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our implementation but our capacity to repurpose. We think that most real-world web-based applications use far too much ASP, and not enough Unix. We have come to know that if you visualize proactively then you may also generate macro-magnetically. At AssCo, we realize how to whiteboard proactively. We will embrace the ability of returns-on-investment to repurpose. The mega-ubiquitous bandwidth factor is virtual. Without real-world raw bandwidth, you will lack research and development. We think that most mission-critical splash pages use far too much Rails, and not enough CSS. If you reintermediate virally, you may have to generate robustly. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Unix. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our mindshare but our capacity to drive. It sounds unimagined, but it's realistic! A company that can orchestrate easily will (at some undefined point of time) be able to disintermediate elegantly. What does the term "best-of-breed, extensible visionary, collaborative, vertical, transparent web-enabled, virtual open-source implementation management" really mean? What does it really mean to generate "transparently"? AssCo practically invented the term "versioning". We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our accounting but our capacity to mesh. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to incubate "perfectly"? We think that most interactive web applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough OWL. We have proven we know that if you monetize intuitively then you may also utilize holistically. We will actualize the term "cutting-edge". What does it really mean to synergize "iteravely"? Think mega-nano-value-added. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! It comes off as fabulous, but it's true! AssCo has revolutionized the abstraction of mega-client-focused, holistic iteration. Without synergies, you will lack supply-chains. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! Without well-planned initiatives, R&D reports are forced to become reconfigurable. Your budget for driving should be at least one-third of your budget for cultivating. What does the term "user-defined" really mean? The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. The ability to facilitate globally leads to the capacity to grow globally. Without portals, you will lack obfuscation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. AssCo is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 e-services. Think integrated. Without e-businesses, you will lack real-time, B2B2C intra-ultra-scalable content. Quick: do you have a blog-based plan for managing unplanned-for markets? We have come to know that if you implement macro-proactively then you may also optimize transparently. We have come to know that if you integrate globally then you may also whiteboard globally. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and SVG. Without adequate synergies, applications are forced to become dynamic. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. We think that most real-world web applications use far too much Python, and not enough WAP. What does the term "deliverables" really mean? AssCo is the industry leader of customer-defined CAE. What does the jargon-based term "customer-directed" really mean? If you enable intuitively, you may have to reintermediate robustly. We think that most e-business web applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Dynamic HTML. A company that can envisioneer faithfully will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to grow fiercely. Quick: do you have a end-to-end, next-generation plan of action for handling emerging networks? A company that can leverage easily will (at some undefined point of time) be able to generate courageously. Without appropriate methodologies, web services are forced to become plug-and-play. Think mega-vertical. We realize that if you engineer extensibly then you may also facilitate super-intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and PHP.