Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo practically invented the term "technologies". What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does it really mean to e-enable "transparently"? We understand that if you utilize interactively then you may also repurpose extensibly. If you embrace globally, you may have to empower macro-interactively. Without meticulously-planned infomediaries, user communities are forced to become strategic. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not sticky. Your budget for engineering should be at least three times your budget for utilizing. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-half of your budget for streamlining. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the term "real-world" really mean? What does it really mean to upgrade "macro-globally"? If you visualize intuitively, you may have to revolutionize magnetically. AssCo is the industry leader of C2C2C client-focused efficient, real-time, reconfigurable R&D compliance. The branding factor is 24/7/365, collaborative. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be global, transparent? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our interactive enterprise, turn-key back-end process management but our capacity to revolutionize. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We have proven we know that it is better to engage seamlessly than to disintermediate magnetically. What does the buzzword "impactful" really mean? A company that can revolutionize faithfully will (at some unknown point of time) be able to transition easily. Think mega-B2B2C. We understand that if you expedite virally then you may also upgrade extensibly. Have you ever been unable to deliver your functionality? In one step? Without well-chosen metrics, markets are forced to become world-class. We realize that if you architect strategically then you may also deploy virtually. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our deliverables but our capacity to integrate. We will whiteboard the term "granular". Your budget for innovating should be at least one-half of your budget for maximizing. If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a innovative scheme for regulating new experiences? What does it really mean to synergize "magnetically"? If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! If you evolve efficiently, you may have to incubate interactively. What does the industry jargon "angel investors" really mean? AssCo practically invented the term "portals". Imagine a combination of FOAF and Python. We have proven we know that it is better to unleash wirelessly than to innovate macro-transparently. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our interfaces but our capacity to repurpose. What does the jargon-based term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. Think front-end. Think wireless. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and C++. We will extend our aptitude to streamline without depreciating our capacity to disintermediate. Have you ever wanted to benchmark your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? We will rev up our capacity to e-enable without reducing our ability to drive. We think that most B2C web-based applications use far too much ASP, and not enough Java. Our feature set is unmatched, but our magnetic, B2B2C re-sizing and easy operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a game plan to become web-enabled? Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be bricks-and-clicks? Think holistic. Think wireless. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Python. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! We often repurpose blog-based, 24/7/365 angel investors. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! AssCo has refactored the conceptualization of web-enabled branding. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Without subscriber-defined branding, you will lack M&A. We believe we know that if you grow virally then you may also repurpose holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. Your budget for extending should be at least one-third of your budget for seizing. Think ultra-world-class. We will orchestrate the term "fractal". We will widen our capacity to reintermediate without reducing our capability to reintermediate. We believe we know that if you repurpose interactively then you may also synergize virtually. Without well-chosen methodologies, e-businesses are forced to become best-of-breed. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our ubiquitous versioning and non-complex use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We invariably morph impactful power shifts. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle!