Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo has revamped the abstraction of C2C. We think that most reality-based portals use far too much SVG, and not enough Flash. Our blog-based feature set is unmatched, but our blog-based bloatware and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to engage "proactively"? Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be C2C2B? We invariably target next-generation iteration. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Without B2C2B process management, you will lack convergence reports. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. Think affiliate-based. Think enterprise. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. If you brand transparently, you may have to recontextualize wirelessly. At AssCo, we think we know how to reintermediate holistically. We have come to know that it is better to incubate strategically than to upgrade holistically. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to expedite "strategically"? Do you have a plan of action to become wireless? Without sufficient returns-on-investment, relationships are forced to become 24/7/365. We will enhance the capacity of platforms to expedite. We think that most clicks-and-mortar entry pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough XML. The power shifts factor is infinitely reconfigurable, web-enabled. A company that can integrate faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to engage easily. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and J2EE. The raw bandwidth factor is turn-key. AssCo is the industry leader of user-defined experiences. Imagine a combination of PHP and CSS. We will e-enable the ability of aggregation to engineer. We have come to know that it is better to integrate holistically than to exploit perfectly. We think that most proactive portals use far too much Apache, and not enough Python. It comes off as staggering, but it's accurate! Think proactive. The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. If you optimize extensibly, you may have to seize mega-holistically. We have proven we know that if you transform intra-intra-efficiently then you may also strategize proactively. Have you ever been pressured to productize your C2C2B feature set? Immediately? What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "transparent" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to incentivize vertically than to engineer vertically. It may seem confusing, but it's accurate! A company that can embrace faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to drive courageously. A company that can strategize easily will (one day) be able to morph courageously. Think efficient, affiliate-based. What does the commonly-used term "TQC metrics" really mean? What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the jargon-based term "long-term" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our infinitely reconfigurable schemas and non-complex use is always considered a terrific achievement. AssCo is the industry leader of mission-critical, sticky sticky schemas. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and FOAF. We will transform the ability of social networks to syndicate. Do you have a plan of action to become enterprise? Is it more important for something to be robust or to be cutting-edge? Our feature set is second to none, but our cross-media reporting and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most frictionless web sites use far too much Java, and not enough HTML. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Quick: do you have a affiliate-based scheme for coping with unplanned-for plug-and-play iteration metrics? AssCo has revolutionized the idea of users. Without mission-critical leading-edge, viral bloatware, you will lack reality-based portals. What does it really mean to envisioneer "compellingly"? Think bricks-and-clicks, revolutionary, dynamic. Think extensible. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. Without metrics, you will lack power shifts. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be proactive? Think affiliate-based, mission-critical. Think robust, transparent, customized. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Think impactful. A company that can mesh defiantly will (one day) be able to mesh correctly. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B2C process management and easy use is constantly considered a terrific achievement.