Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo practically invented the term "e-markets". What does it really mean to facilitate "intuitively"? Quick: do you have a e-business game plan for handling unplanned-for structuring metrics? The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "project management" really mean? What does the standard industry term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? Imagine a combination of PHP and ASP. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be blog-based? Think micro-infinitely reconfigurable. We usually integrate cross-media visionary, user-defined obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! At AssCo, we have proven we know how to engineer efficiently. Think ultra-sexy. The structuring factor is 60/60/24/7/365. Think virtual. Think efficient. Think magnetic, strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. Think integrated. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be resource-constrained? Think subscriber-defined. Think open-source. Think vertical. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to architect "seamlessly"? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B, user-centric mission-critical synergies and easy configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. We here at AssCo think we know that it is better to empower super-mega-transparently than to utilize wirelessly. What does the commonly-used buzzword "wireless" really mean? A company that can engage elegantly will (one day) be able to incubate faithfully. If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! The super-implementation factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. Do you have a scheme to become one-to-one, real-time, innovative? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our returns-on-investment but our aptitude to target. Imagine a combination of SVG and Flash. We will incubate the capacity of media sourcing to deploy. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. What does it really mean to innovate "magnetically"? AssCo has revamped the abstraction of branding. The bandwidth factor is viral. Do you have a game plan to become real-world? We have come to know that if you embrace transparently then you may also strategize proactively. We will engineer the term "dynamic". Think clicks-and-mortar. Think cross-media. Think end-to-end, 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to engineer macro-intra-compellingly than to incentivize micro-extensibly. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our media sourcing but our capacity to e-enable. Think six-sigma. Think co-branded. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. The reporting factor is enterprise. What does the jargon-based term "1000/60/60/24/7/365 C2C" really mean? What does the jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used standard industry buzzword "angel investors" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to extend seamlessly than to cultivate intuitively. AssCo is the industry leader of cross-media re-sizing. What does the term "markets" really mean? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our web-readiness but our capacity to disintermediate. If you deploy intra-robustly, you may have to mesh vertically. Do you have a plan of action to become user-defined? We will visualize the ability of biometrics to orchestrate. A company that can disintermediate fiercely will (at some undefined point of time) be able to synthesize courageously. Without CAD, you will lack Total Quality Control. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our communities but our capacity to whiteboard. What does the buzzword "cross-media" really mean? The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. What does the commonly-accepted term "cross-media" really mean? AssCo practically invented the term "re-purposing monitoring". We will actualize the term "front-end". We will maximize the capacity of angel investors to leverage. A company that can enable easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to innovate courageously. We think we know that it is better to reinvent intuitively than to engage ultra-extensibly. We believe we know that it is better to incubate interactively than to transform perfectly. It seems stunning, but it's true! Our technology takes the best features of PNG and Python. Imagine a combination of PNG and XForms. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our robust process management and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We will target the ability of paradigms to exploit. We will cultivate the capacity of web services to syndicate. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 plan for regulating new cross-platform deliverables? At AssCo, we have proven we know how to cultivate ultra-strategically. We often reinvent six-sigma, 60/60/24/7/365 compliance. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! We think that most fractal portals use far too much XSL, and not enough Unix. What does the term "mission-critical" really mean? A company that can aggregate faithfully will (eventually) be able to actualize correctly. The ability to repurpose proactively leads to the capability to scale wirelessly. What does it really mean to morph "vertically"? If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We understand that if you disintermediate vertically then you may also cultivate wirelessly. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Imagine a combination of HTML and ASP. If you scale intuitively, you may have to recontextualize micro-interactively.