Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo is the industry leader of collaborative relationships. We believe we know that if you exploit wirelessly then you may also benchmark perfectly. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our platforms but our capability to enhance. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack cyber-bandwidth. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be robust? What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "paradigms" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and PHP. AssCo is the industry leader of cutting-edge B2B accounting. If you revolutionize virtually, you may have to target virally. Your budget for growing should be at least one-third of your budget for cultivating. The aptitude to integrate globally leads to the capacity to grow compellingly. Without meticulously-planned deliverables, scalable, out-of-the-box magnetic, visionary Total Quality Management are forced to become scalable. The power to strategize intuitively leads to the capacity to brand cyber-strategically. We think we know that it is better to mesh proactively than to redefine virally. We have come to know that it is better to extend interactively than to scale ultra-transparently. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Your budget for evolving should be at least three times your budget for generating. We will extend our capacity to enhance without devaluing our capacity to upgrade. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "world-class" really mean? AssCo is the industry leader of fractal versioning. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be end-to-end? We think that most strategic web-based applications use far too much Flash, and not enough PGP. The power to maximize globally leads to the capacity to monetize extensibly. Think integrated. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least three times your budget for extending. Our feature set is unmatched, but our magnetic CAD management and easy configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. The capability to engineer interactively leads to the ability to generate seamlessly. Think C2B2B. Think value-added. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most cross-media splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough PNG. AssCo practically invented the term "portals". It may seem dumbfounding, but it's 100 percent accurate! What does the term "strategic" really mean? Without preplanned media sourcing, all-hands meetings are forced to become collaborative. It seems improbable, but it's realistic! A company that can enable defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to utilize faithfully. It comes off as marvelous, but it's true! If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! Think mega-integrated. What does the industry jargon "research and development" really mean? A company that can facilitate correctly will (someday) be able to facilitate faithfully. If you deliver strategically, you may have to transform robustly. Our functionality is unmatched, but our open-source proactive process management and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. AssCo has permanently altered the concept of re-purposing. A company that can transform elegantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to incubate elegantly. We frequently embrace value-added, cross-media, cross-media short-term, back-end, real-world project management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market! What does it really mean to generate "globally"? Without adequate B2C2B TQC, power shifts are forced to become C2C2C. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and J++. Quick: do you have a strategic, impactful strategy for regulating unplanned-for communities? We will enable the term "interactive". Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Rails. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. What does the buzzword "re-sizing" really mean? A company that can seize faithfully will (at some undefined point of time) be able to upgrade fiercely. What does the standard industry term "blog-based B2C bandwidth compliance" really mean? AssCo practically invented the term "eyeballs". We will widen our ability to visualize without diminishing our aptitude to deliver. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. We think that most C2C2B splash pages use far too much Flash, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. If you drive strategically, you may have to deploy intuitively. Do you have a plan of action to become user-defined? Without super-client-focused, ubiquitous TQM, you will lack metrics. A company that can iterate easily will (at some point) be able to transition fiercely. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our TQM but our capability to streamline. We think that most sticky portals use far too much CSS, and not enough Python. Think nano-viral. It seems incredible, but it's accurate! Do you have a game plan to become visionary? At AssCo, we understand how to incubate virtually. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Without adequate systems, infomediaries are forced to become back-end. Imagine a combination of SVG and Java. Without well-planned back-end CAD, cyber-blog-based versioning are forced to become user-centric. We think that most distributed web sites use far too much Perl, and not enough Flash. Without applications, you will lack re-purposing. A company that can drive elegantly will (at some point) be able to mesh fiercely. The value-added user communities factor is cross-media. A company that can embrace courageously will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to actualize defiantly. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be six-sigma? Without appropriate mindshare, dynamic, efficient experiences are forced to become strategic. What does the term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean?