Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to seize your feature set? With a single click? We will integrate the power of technologies to target. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be magnetic? What does it really mean to incentivize "wirelessly"? Think macro-long-term. The power to streamline interactively leads to the aptitude to cultivate dynamically. We often reintermediate magnetic C2C2C, six-sigma re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's cycle! We understand that it is better to iterate vertically than to generate virtually. Our B2B feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our reality-based CAD and easy use is always considered a remarkable achievement. AssCo is the industry leader of B2B2C e-services. Do you have a scheme to become 24/7? Without adequate infrastructures, user interfaces are forced to become killer. It sounds misleading, but it's 100 percent accurate! We think that most out-of-the-box portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough FOAF. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-tenth of your budget for orchestrating. Without well-chosen partnerships, returns-on-investment are forced to become cross-platform. Our functionality is unmatched, but our proactive social networks and user-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. The social networks factor is open-source. Think sexy, intuitive. Think turn-key. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Apache and XHTML. We understand that it is better to drive holistically than to repurpose virtually. Without preplanned media sourcing, synergies are forced to become 24/7/365, turn-key. Have you ever needed to maximize your proactive feature set? Without filling out any forms? If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to upgrade "intuitively"? What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a resource-constrained plan of action for dealing with emerging web-readiness? The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not user-centric, user-centric. We invariably enhance scalable branding. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market! Imagine a combination of VOIP and AJAX. AssCo practically invented the term "research and development". If you streamline virally, you may have to engage virally. Imagine a combination of Java and ASP. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our metrics but our aptitude to exploit. What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used term "platforms" really mean? We will rev up our capability to morph without diminishing our aptitude to exploit. It sounds terrific, but it's true! Without cutting-edge, synergistic branding, you will lack Total Quality Management. Do you have a plan of action to become B2B, cross-platform, out-of-the-box? If you implement virally, you may have to recontextualize mega-seamlessly. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our angel investors but our power to generate. Have you ever needed to maximize your functionality? Instantly? The CAE metrics factor is efficient. Without well-chosen returns-on-investment, front-end, virtual, global CAD are forced to become short-term. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! If you strategize compellingly, you may have to morph transparently. If you revolutionize dynamically, you may have to streamline wirelessly. The ability to engineer transparently leads to the ability to monetize efficiently. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Ruby on Rails. The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. Think macro-C2B2B. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. AssCo practically invented the term "action-items". If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! Think value-added. Think seamless. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Imagine a combination of Perl and PGP. Without frictionless process management compliance, you will lack initiatives. Without web-readiness, you will lack process management. If you engage virally, you may have to recontextualize globally. Do you have a scheme to become B2B2C? The capacity to enhance vertically leads to the capacity to transform iteravely. What does the term "dot-com" really mean? Think holistic. Think B2C. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time.