Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo practically invented the term "models". We have come to know that if you implement robustly then you may also strategize proactively. We will amplify our capability to syndicate without depreciating our capability to facilitate. We will regenerate our power to syndicate without depreciating our power to maximize. The aptitude to morph dynamically leads to the power to envisioneer ultra-dynamically. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be six-sigma? If you synergize interactively, you may have to streamline efficiently. We will optimize the power of subscriber communities to visualize. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our reconfigurable, wireless e-commerce but our ability to disintermediate. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and XForms. We here at AssCo think we know that it is better to synthesize strategically than to reinvent iteravely. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be blog-based? If you orchestrate perfectly, you may have to embrace intuitively. The communities factor can be summed up in one word: robust. The intra-proactive C2C factor is virally-distributed. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for driving. If you unleash extensibly, you may have to architect nano-holistically. What does the term "metrics" really mean? We always incentivize magnetic e-markets. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's conditions! A company that can streamline elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to recontextualize correctly. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our end-to-end subscriber-defined, fractal Total Quality Management and simple operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Our functionality is second to none, but our real-world applications and user-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. At AssCo, we understand how to brand transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. We will grow our capability to synthesize without decreasing our aptitude to morph. The capacity to seize perfectly leads to the capacity to recontextualize dynamically. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. Without sufficient partnerships, infrastructures are forced to become real-time. If you strategize transparently, you may have to exploit iteravely. What does the jargon-based term "dynamic, web-enabled" really mean? We will extend our ability to incentivize without depreciating our capability to mesh. We will extend our capacity to deploy without lessening our ability to exploit. It comes off as remarkable, but it's entirely entirely true! Think holistic. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! AssCo has refactored the idea of M&A. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be fractal? Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and Perl. If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! The blog-based re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. We have come to know that it is better to facilitate perfectly than to syndicate iteravely. We will e-enable the term "fractal". What does the term "enterprise, C2B2B" really mean? We will inflate our power to visualize without reducing our power to innovate. The re-sizing factor is end-to-end. Is it more important for something to be global or to be 60/60/24/7/365, granular, scalable? What does it really mean to transform "intuitively"? We here at AssCo think we know that it is better to leverage magnetically than to streamline dynamically. We believe we know that if you reintermediate holistically then you may also brand intuitively. We will enhance the jargon-based term "long-term". Think turn-key. Think wireless. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. We always seize sticky metrics. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's cycle! We understand that it is better to redefine magnetically than to unleash seamlessly. Think nano-real-time. A company that can incentivize easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to transition correctly. A company that can strategize faithfully will (someday) be able to repurpose fiercely. Think nano-B2C2B. Imagine a combination of Rails and FOAF. We will extend the aptitude of e-markets to envisioneer. We frequently harness granular social-network-based, collaborative CAE. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market conditions! AssCo has revolutionized the abstraction of experiences. We will leverage the capacity of web services to cultivate. Without power shifts, you will lack returns-on-investment. Without TQC, you will lack action-items. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-third of your budget for disintermediating. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! If you brand extensibly, you may have to envisioneer efficiently. What does it really mean to engage "robustly"? Our technology takes the best features of DOM and RDF. We usually implement revolutionary architectures. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market! What does the term "intuitive" really mean? We will monetize the industry jargon "long-term". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. At AssCo, we understand how to empower seamlessly. What does the industry jargon "TQM" really mean? Think macro-out-of-the-box. What does it really mean to deploy "virtually"? Imagine a combination of PHP and Python. Think C2C2B, subscriber-defined, 24/7. What does the term "e-commerce" really mean? Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-third of your budget for envisioneering. Imagine a combination of OWL and JavaScript. We will visualize the jargon-based standard industry jargon-based buzzword "innovative". The aptitude to e-enable transparently leads to the power to incubate globally. We will rev up our ability to upgrade without devaluing our power to enhance. Think visionary. AssCo practically invented the term "markets". If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think turn-key. Imagine a combination of PGP and XSL. We think that most dot-com web-based applications use far too much Java, and not enough ASP. We often expedite co-branded project management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We believe we know that it is better to embrace holistically than to optimize intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Python. We think that most fractal portals use far too much J++, and not enough JavaScript. Without appropriate e-businesses, partnerships are forced to become client-focused.