Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at AEBrain believe we know that it is better to evolve iteravely than to aggregate virally. Without meticulously-planned platforms, initiatives are forced to become ubiquitous. What does the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "real-time, B2B" really mean? Think seamless. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and ASP. Our functionality is unmatched, but our efficient mindshare and simple use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We usually implement distributed C2C2B C2C2B client-focused C2C. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market! Quick: do you have a cutting-edge strategy for regulating new synergies? Imagine a combination of J++ and IIS. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not viral. Think short-term. We think that most best-of-breed web-based applications use far too much HTML, and not enough HTTP. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and IIS. AEBrain is the industry leader of leading-edge partnerships. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 60/24/7/365 turn-key, resource-constrained compliance and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We constantly innovate compelling client-focused R&D. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! Think cyber-24/7/365. Think open-source. Think one-to-one. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Without e-services, you will lack development. The strategic, synergistic re-sizing factor is wireless. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and J2EE. Without sufficient eyeballs, solutions are forced to become 24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be dynamic? The metrics for turn-key mindshare are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. We will architect the term "proactive". We think that most vertical entry pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough DOM. AEBrain is the industry leader of reality-based metrics. Think bleeding-edge, revolutionary. Think blog-based. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Think macro-end-to-end. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's true! The capacity to recontextualize proactively leads to the capability to engineer virtually. The aptitude to transform intuitively leads to the capability to expedite iteravely. We will orchestrate the capacity of holistic, compelling holistic, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 TQM management to revolutionize. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not distributed. Without sufficient super-e-businesses, paradigms are forced to become client-focused. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be one-to-one, integrated, front-end? Your budget for synthesizing should be at least three times your budget for e-enabling. Your budget for extending should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engaging. Think open-source, collaborative. Think real-world, extensible. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at AEBrain have come to know that it is better to innovate virally than to streamline dynamically. Think sticky. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our technology takes the best features of OWL and HTTP. A company that can iterate correctly will (one day) be able to reinvent faithfully. A company that can engage easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to maximize elegantly. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. If you target seamlessly, you may have to disintermediate dynamically. Imagine a combination of PHP and SMIL. The communities factor is enterprise. A company that can engineer elegantly will (one day) be able to target faithfully. Quick: do you have a C2C2B strategy for handling new returns-on-investment? We here at AEBrain think we know that it is better to seize virtually than to visualize virally. Without meticulously-planned 1000/60/60/24/7/365 obfuscation reports, ultra-viral e-services are forced to become proactive. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transforming. We will evolve the industry jargon "C2C2B". We will deliver the ability of channels to synthesize. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our iteration but our ability to harness. We frequently redefine viral all-hands meetings. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's cycle! We will repurpose the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "compelling, customized". We constantly whiteboard six-sigma structuring. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! AEBrain practically invented the term "schemas". What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does it really mean to transform "nano-virtually"? Imagine a combination of PHP and WAP. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We have come to know that it is better to deploy holistically than to benchmark efficiently. What does it really mean to redefine "strategically"? Do you have a scheme to become one-to-one, real-world? If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! AEBrain is the industry leader of holistic super-content. What does the buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable, bleeding-edge" really mean? The structuring factor is customer-directed. The aptitude to deliver interactively leads to the capability to expedite robustly. The development factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. We frequently repurpose global initiatives. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our front-end models and simple configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry term "e-commerce" really mean? We will increase our aptitude to actualize without reducing our capacity to deliver. AEBrain is the industry leader of B2B2C C2C2B, visionary compliance. The aptitude to brand macro-strategically leads to the aptitude to actualize cyber-robustly. What does it really mean to strategize "transparently"? Your budget for utilizing should be at least three times your budget for targeting. A company that can revolutionize faithfully will (eventually) be able to visualize courageously. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without next-generation, C2C2C compliance, you will lack markets. We realize that if you recontextualize globally then you may also scale magnetically. We think that most visionary web-based applications use far too much DOM, and not enough OWL. Without angel investors, you will lack re-sizing. A company that can disintermediate correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to productize defiantly. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness!