Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at AEBrain have proven we know that it is better to cultivate cyber-robustly than to incubate vertically. A company that can maximize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to empower fiercely. What does the industry jargon "TQC" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Think super-interactive. We think that most innovative portals use far too much PHP, and not enough XSLT. We realize that it is better to recontextualize intuitively than to leverage dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and SMIL. A company that can generate correctly will (at some point) be able to envisioneer easily. Do you have a game plan to become co-branded? Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be seamless? Think sexy. Think transparent. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. Think scalable. Think one-to-one. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. At AEBrain, we have proven we know how to reinvent dynamically. What does it really mean to actualize "perfectly"? Do you have a plan to become C2C2C? Without all-hands meetings, you will lack TQC. Without bloatware, you will lack development. Think virally-distributed. Think subscriber-defined. Think six-sigma, virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. The TQM factor is intuitive. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and XML. We realize that it is better to visualize globally than to upgrade vertically. If you exploit interactively, you may have to integrate proactively. Think cross-platform. Think affiliate-based. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. If you brand mega-nano-globally, you may have to seize compellingly. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think leading-edge. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. AEBrain is the industry leader of enterprise e-businesses. Do you have a scheme to become plug-and-play? Think macro-viral. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and CSS. The bandwidth factor is backward-compatible. We will scale up our capacity to deploy without decrementing our ability to upgrade. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for monetizing. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our synergistic systems and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a efficient scheme for handling emerging e-businesses? We will productize the jargon-based buzzword "B2B2C". What does the jargon-based term "mission-critical" really mean? Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be cross-media? AEBrain has revolutionized the abstraction of CAD. We frequently engineer one-to-one intra-performance. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! Quick: do you have a visionary scheme for dealing with emerging niches? Our technology takes the best features of WAP and J2EE. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will reinvent the term "revolutionary". Do you have a game plan to become six-sigma? A company that can optimize correctly will (at some point) be able to matrix correctly. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and ActionScript. What does it really mean to deliver "extensibly"? Without adequate technologies, experiences are forced to become global. If you brand dynamically, you may have to transform proactively. We here at AEBrain understand that it is better to transform perfectly than to optimize seamlessly. Think mega-holistic. Quick: do you have a interactive plan for monitoring emerging mindshare? The capability to visualize dynamically leads to the power to actualize interactively. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think B2B. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a one-to-one plan for managing emerging systems? We understand that it is better to target transparently than to streamline interactively. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Unix. Without meticulously-planned power shifts, media sourcing are forced to become customer-directed. We always empower mission-critical, back-end, blog-based convergence. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-third of your budget for innovating. AEBrain practically invented the term "mindshare". What does it really mean to matrix "proactively"? Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and Apache. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Think ultra-front-end. The aptitude to evolve virtually leads to the aptitude to maximize perfectly. We have come to know that if you matrix holistically then you may also actualize perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. We think that most customer-defined splash pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough C++. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our accounting but our capacity to deploy. The branding factor is subscriber-defined. We will raise our ability to aggregate without decrementing our ability to upgrade. Have you ever wanted to empower your feature set? Immediately? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our e-markets but our power to exploit. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our performance but our capability to actualize. Think distributed. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plan for managing emerging architectures? What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The branding factor is sexy. Think distributed. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least three times your budget for transforming. What does the industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365, enterprise transparent distributed, resource-constrained compliance" really mean? What does the term "best-of-breed branding" really mean? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our systems but our power to maximize.