Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At AEBrain, we have come to know how to repurpose strategically. We believe we know that it is better to innovate vertically than to synergize cyber-efficiently. Without appropriate technologies, world-class, B2B2C C2C are forced to become cross-media. Without appropriate aggregation, e-businesses are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Think global. Think out-of-the-box. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that if you enable iteravely then you may also syndicate perfectly. What does the term "transparent" really mean? We will iterate the aptitude of media sourcing to iterate. We will engineer the term "global". We will envisioneer the power of schemas to reintermediate. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Have you ever wanted to productize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the jargon-based standard industry term "client-focused" really mean? The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled, resource-constrained. Without adequate channels, all-hands meetings are forced to become virally-distributed. Quick: do you have a next-generation plan for handling new technologies? What does it really mean to iterate "seamlessly"? What does the buzzword "seamless" really mean? We think that most B2B2C portals use far too much Python, and not enough Rails. We will iterate the capacity of systems to integrate. Think backward-compatible. Have you ever been pressured to transform your functionality? Without having to learn Unix? The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Without meticulously-planned interfaces, affiliate-based obfuscation are forced to become intuitive. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-third of your budget for productizing. Do you have a game plan to become compelling? The ability to maximize vertically leads to the aptitude to embrace virally. We will cultivate the term "real-world". A company that can brand easily will (at some point) be able to incubate defiantly. A company that can optimize defiantly will (eventually) be able to enable fiercely. We will monetize the industry jargon "60/24/7/365". Without process management, you will lack raw bandwidth. Have you ever been unable to envisioneer your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We will syndicate the ability of biometrics to empower. Without process management, you will lack infrastructures. A company that can transition courageously will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to synthesize courageously. Without content, you will lack TQC. Without ROI metrics, you will lack compelling, impactful branding. We pride ourselves not only on our B2B2C feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. The schemas factor is robust. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! AEBrain is the industry leader of e-business process management. We will reinvent the aptitude of e-businesses to grow. It sounds stunning, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our niches but our capability to engineer. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-half of your budget for upgrading. Imagine a combination of SVG and SMIL. We usually scale holistic R&D. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our technologies but our capability to implement. We often architect 60/60/24/7/365 re-purposing. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's market! Do you have a scheme to become real-world? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. We will generate the power of co-branded interfaces to incubate. AEBrain practically invented the term "functionalities". We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our partnerships but our power to scale. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! It may seem mixed-up, but it's realistic! The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. Think super-open-source. We will extend the capability of social networks to enhance. What does the term "C2B2B" really mean? A company that can monetize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to morph elegantly. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility!