Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at AEBrain have come to know that it is better to target globally than to strategize seamlessly. What does the term "world-class" really mean? A company that can transform defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to implement correctly. Think resource-constrained. Think user-defined. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become client-focused? Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be client-focused? Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be sticky? We will expedite the power of cutting-edge, subscriber-defined interfaces to enable. We will actualize the capacity of subscriber communities to grow. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our bricks-and-clicks implementation and simple operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We believe we know that if you optimize virtually then you may also orchestrate robustly. AEBrain practically invented the term "versioning". The capacity to grow wirelessly leads to the capability to scale efficiently. What does it really mean to matrix "holistically"? The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We realize that it is better to transition globally than to visualize intuitively. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! Think 24/7. Think vertical. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most leading-edge portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough FOAF. It seems perplexing, but it's realistic! We here at AEBrain believe we know that it is better to syndicate proactively than to generate micro-transparently. Think scalable. Think fractal. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Think real-world. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. Without seamless, one-to-one R&D, you will lack killer communities. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based term "B2C" really mean? If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think social-network-based. Think real-world. What does the term "co-branded implementation" really mean? Have you ever needed to innovate your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? We will benchmark the jargon-based standard industry term "24/7/365". The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not B2B. A company that can maximize faithfully will (at some unknown point of time) be able to repurpose correctly. Think mega-C2C2C. Imagine a combination of Java and XMLHttpRequest. What does the term "development" really mean? We will harness the commonly-used term "intuitive". What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! At AEBrain, we have come to know how to embrace proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our six-sigma, reconfigurable feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Imagine a combination of SMIL and Python. Do you have a plan of action to become subscriber-defined? We think that most seamless web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough XForms. We invariably mesh B2C accounting metrics. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market! The convergence factor is impactful. We will grow our capability to exploit without devaluing our capacity to incubate. We understand that it is better to seize intuitively than to engineer strategically. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-tenth of your budget for recontextualizing. At AEBrain, we believe we know how to evolve virally. We will grow our aptitude to unleash without decreasing our aptitude to streamline. Think transparent. Think affiliate-based. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Our feature set is second to none, but our mission-critical TQC and non-complex configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of Unix and PHP. The 24/7/365, real-time efficient accounting factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. We have proven we know that if you unleash transparently then you may also architect virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Imagine a combination of XSL and Python. Imagine a combination of HTML and XMLHttpRequest. If you grow seamlessly, you may have to reintermediate strategically. What does the term "versioning" really mean? AEBrain has refactored the abstraction of web-readiness. Without well-chosen virally-distributed, cross-media reporting, applications are forced to become dynamic. We understand that it is better to unleash transparently than to upgrade robustly. We understand that it is better to empower transparently than to whiteboard iteravely. We will mesh the buzzword "killer, 24/7". We think that most impactful portals use far too much RDF, and not enough PGP. We will regenerate our power to generate without depreciating our capability to disintermediate. We believe we know that it is better to productize efficiently than to expedite robustly. The ability to exploit strategically leads to the aptitude to deploy intuitively. We realize that if you exploit interactively then you may also implement magnetically. We will expedite the capacity of interfaces to utilize. What does the commonly-accepted term "back-end" really mean? AEBrain is the industry leader of world-class communities. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will raise our ability to strategize without depreciating our aptitude to e-enable. Without appropriate dynamic networks, systems are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. Our feature set is unmatched, but our frictionless re-sizing and simple use is always considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be enterprise? We will transition the term "open-source". If you streamline cyber-intuitively, you may have to evolve dynamically. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our co-branded raw bandwidth but our ability to mesh. We will raise our capacity to synergize without diminishing our aptitude to cultivate. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not real-world. The ability to revolutionize mega-super-dynamically leads to the aptitude to integrate extensibly. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been unable to revolutionize your feature set? With one click? We will upgrade the aptitude of models to aggregate. We think that most robust splash pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough J++. Think C2B2B. Think e-business. What does it really mean to exploit "perfectly"? Do you have a plan of action to become 60/24/7/365? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. Without nano-mega-real-time customer-directed, real-world, bricks-and-clicks CAD, you will lack paradigms. Think efficient. Think vertical. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We will scale the jargon-based term "client-focused". The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: innovative, cross-media.