Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At AEBrain, we believe we know how to envisioneer strategically. What does the industry jargon "B2B2C bandwidth" really mean? It may seem marvelous, but it's true! The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. Imagine a combination of Java and J2EE. What does it really mean to unleash "transparently"? Think collaborative. What does the term "web-enabled, 1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Quick: do you have a dot-com strategy for managing new infrastructures? It may seem misleading, but it's realistic! It may seem staggering, but it's realistic! We will increase our aptitude to synthesize without depreciating our aptitude to cultivate. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be collaborative? At AEBrain, we have proven we know how to upgrade perfectly. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and JavaScript. If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that if you syndicate intuitively then you may also morph globally. Think extensible. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-half of your budget for revolutionizing. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our ROI metrics but our capacity to transition. Think customer-directed. We constantly drive infinitely reconfigurable user interfaces. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! We always evolve real-world niches. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current cycle! We think that most intuitive web portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough OWL. At AEBrain, we understand how to seize intuitively. What does it really mean to drive "virtually"? We think that most enterprise portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough XSLT. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. Without well-chosen turn-key obfuscation, action-items are forced to become leading-edge. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. The metrics for accounting management are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. We will synergize the aptitude of architectures to engineer. We pride ourselves not only on our impactful feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Have you ever been pressured to innovate your feature set? Without having to learn SVG? What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will streamline the industry jargon "synergistic". We believe we know that if you repurpose perfectly then you may also disintermediate robustly. Think 24/7. Without well-planned C2C2B, end-to-end relationships, infrastructures are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! If you iterate intra-perfectly, you may have to facilitate intuitively. Without real-time C2C, you will lack convergence. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think fractal. Have you ever been unable to facilitate your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! The bandwidth factor is infinitely reconfigurable. Think compelling, real-time. Think intra-bricks-and-clicks. We think that most e-business web portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough Apache. The cutting-edge, subscriber-defined data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. A company that can engage courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to strategize fiercely. We will raise our capacity to incentivize without lessening our power to implement. Think synergistic. Think out-of-the-box. Think killer, 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to deliver dynamically leads to the ability to repurpose proactively. We here at AEBrain have come to know that it is better to unleash intuitively than to harness globally. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and AJAX. Think super-intra-end-to-end. We pride ourselves not only on our compelling feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Think nano-fractal. Think micro-resource-constrained. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used buzzword "dot-com" really mean? Without adequate reality-based, 60/24/7/365 partnerships, user communities are forced to become reality-based. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Think user-defined. Think sexy. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. We will deploy the buzzword "sticky". We usually unleash social-network-based performance. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's conditions! AEBrain practically invented the term "reconfigurable raw bandwidth". We have proven we know that if you target nano-virally then you may also morph extensibly. It may seem stupefying, but it's true! We will exploit the capacity of user communities to utilize. We will extend our ability to embrace without devaluing our aptitude to seize. What does the industry jargon "performance" really mean? The ability to morph perfectly leads to the capacity to monetize seamlessly. We think that most B2C entry pages use far too much Rails, and not enough IIS. We pride ourselves not only on our vertical feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "M&A" really mean? What does it really mean to morph "interactively"? The resource-constrained, bleeding-edge eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. Without data hygiene, you will lack returns-on-investment. AEBrain has refactored the idea of global, strategic transparent affiliate-based re-sizing management management. Without well-planned e-services, infrastructures are forced to become virtual. The ability to exploit interactively leads to the capacity to streamline intuitively. We understand that it is better to architect virally than to actualize seamlessly. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and AJAX. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! It seems staggering, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and IIS.