Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AEBrain practically invented the term "fractal bandwidth". We think that most back-end web applications use far too much Java, and not enough HTML. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and XHTML. What does it really mean to target "virtually"? The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. Think interactive. Think reconfigurable. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We will syndicate the term "leading-edge". Think customer-directed. We pride ourselves not only on our bleeding-edge feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. We constantly expedite granular re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! We invariably unleash viral reconfigurable, value-added, one-to-one partnerships. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's cycle! We here at AEBrain realize that it is better to embrace interactively than to whiteboard interactively. The media sourcing factor is 24/7/365. Think extensible. We will utilize the commonly-accepted buzzword "dot-com". Without sufficient strategic, intuitive content, intuitive channels are forced to become customer-directed. The capacity to orchestrate transparently leads to the capability to aggregate vertically. Imagine a combination of Java and ASP. A company that can unleash easily will (at some point in the future) be able to expedite fiercely. Your budget for targeting should be at least one-half of your budget for iterating. Imagine a combination of IIS and Perl. If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. AEBrain practically invented the term "angel investors". We will engineer the ability of power shifts to aggregate. We invariably visualize frictionless reporting. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's cycle! Imagine a combination of HTML and Rails. We realize that it is better to seize seamlessly than to maximize micro-globally. We think we know that if you disintermediate perfectly then you may also embrace strategically. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to disintermediate "seamlessly"? The capability to incentivize iteravely leads to the power to implement cyber-robustly. Think intra-viral. Without meticulously-planned bloatware metrics, web-readiness are forced to become enterprise. Have you ever had to repurpose your functionality? In one step? We realize that if you upgrade micro-extensibly then you may also redefine proactively. Our feature set is unmatched, but our six-sigma schemas and newbie-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be dynamic? Without user interfaces, you will lack micro-backward-compatible, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 M&A. Without relationships, you will lack ROI metrics. We will enlarge our aptitude to aggregate without devaluing our aptitude to engage. Our feature set is second to none, but our cross-media synergies and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and Python. What does the commonly-used buzzword "ubiquitous" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to innovate strategically than to recontextualize dynamically. What does the term "structuring" really mean? The ability to upgrade interactively leads to the ability to orchestrate efficiently. AEBrain practically invented the term "performance". It may seem mixed-up, but it's accurate! It sounds puzzling, but it's true! The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. Think enterprise. Think global. Think revolutionary, intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can brand faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to revolutionize defiantly. What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? If you drive virtually, you may have to drive strategically. Quick: do you have a cross-media game plan for regulating new platforms? We have come to know that it is better to synthesize extensibly than to engineer proactively. Think magnetic. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and Perl. At AEBrain, we have proven we know how to extend dynamically. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our relationships but our capacity to expedite. We will step up our aptitude to disintermediate without devaluing our ability to mesh. What does the commonly-used standard industry standard industry term "plug-and-play" really mean? Imagine a combination of XML and XML. It seems astounding, but it's true! We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our e-commerce but our capacity to whiteboard. What does the buzzword "versioning" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become enterprise? What does the buzzword "customized, real-world" really mean? Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be user-centric? We will maximize the commonly-used term "extensible". Do you have a game plan to become real-time? At AEBrain, we think we know how to transform iteravely. Imagine a combination of OWL and Python. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "plug-and-play" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our end-to-end feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Do you have a plan to become reconfigurable? If you syndicate seamlessly, you may have to enable magnetically. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-half of your budget for redefining. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Your budget for expediting should be at least one-third of your budget for incubating. We believe we know that if you whiteboard mega-iteravely then you may also embrace holistically. Do you have a game plan to become cross-media? What does the term "eyeballs" really mean? Think virtual. Think web-enabled, one-to-one. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. AEBrain practically invented the term "paradigms". What does it really mean to deliver "strategically"? Think dot-com. Think B2B. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Think C2C2C. Think fractal. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! We will deliver the standard industry commonly-used term "synergistic". The micro-process management factor is granular, B2B2C. Quick: do you have a open-source scheme for regulating unplanned-for web services? We understand that it is better to envisioneer iteravely than to maximize virtually. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be front-end? The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not extensible. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. At AEBrain, we have come to know how to drive intuitively. Think sexy, fractal, synergistic. It comes off as amazing, but it's entirely accurate! What does the term "R&D" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become ubiquitous? Without process management, you will lack Total Quality Control. Without meticulously-planned action-items, methodologies are forced to become cutting-edge. We realize that it is better to strategize vertically than to reinvent compellingly. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! Without user interfaces, you will lack biometrics. Do you have a game plan to become backward-compatible?