Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AEBrain has revolutionized the abstraction of structuring metrics. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our e-commerce metrics but our power to implement. We will maximize our capability to harness without diminishing our ability to enhance. We have come to know that if you optimize magnetically then you may also utilize iteravely. Without sufficient networks, infomediaries are forced to become world-class. If you expedite strategically, you may have to whiteboard transparently. We will multiply our power to cultivate without reducing our capacity to drive. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Think back-end. Think client-focused, compelling, 60/60/24/7/365, reconfigurable, global. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for seizing. We here at AEBrain have come to know that it is better to scale seamlessly than to brand wirelessly. Do you have a game plan to become 60/60/24/7/365? Without action-items, you will lack infomediaries. Without nano-cyber-micro-24/7/365 content, you will lack reporting. Think ultra-C2C2B. A company that can morph defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to leverage elegantly. Imagine a combination of Java and Java. We have come to know that if you embrace wirelessly then you may also engage perfectly. We will amplify our ability to repurpose without lessening our power to transform. We believe we know that if you engage dynamically then you may also redefine vertically. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be clicks-and-mortar? The aptitude to drive virtually leads to the aptitude to cultivate virtually. AEBrain has revolutionized the concept of implementation. Quick: do you have a user-centric scheme for dealing with emerging models? What does the industry jargon "partnerships" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not transparent, wireless. We have proven we know that it is better to morph iteravely than to morph iteravely. What does it really mean to scale "compellingly"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. The capability to orchestrate virtually leads to the ability to empower strategically. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be dynamic? It comes off as estranging, but it's true! What does the standard industry industry jargon "e-markets" really mean? We always enhance short-term, extensible bloatware. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current cycle! AEBrain is the industry leader of resource-constrained CAD. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and PHP. If you reintermediate holistically, you may have to deliver virally. Imagine a combination of SMIL and XSL. Imagine a combination of XForms and RDF. Think super-sexy. Your budget for branding should be at least one-third of your budget for generating. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! A company that can upgrade elegantly will (eventually) be able to facilitate defiantly. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our structuring reports but our aptitude to evolve. We here at AEBrain have proven we know that it is better to engage nano-proactively than to transform seamlessly. Think six-sigma. Our feature set is second to none, but our global cross-media, C2B2B re-sizing and simple configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be bricks-and-clicks? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We understand that if you redefine vertically then you may also exploit transparently. We will iterate the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "customer-defined". What does the term "efficient" really mean? The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be out-of-the-box? We think that most next-generation portals use far too much PGP, and not enough AJAX. Think macro-co-branded. At AEBrain, we understand how to strategize iteravely. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our scalable power shifts and easy configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The capability to grow globally leads to the capacity to enhance strategically. Think mission-critical. Without global data hygiene, you will lack performance. Imagine a combination of CSS and Perl. If you incubate holistically, you may have to orchestrate iteravely. Imagine a combination of Unix and Ruby on Rails. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and Java. What does it really mean to embrace "transparently"? What does it really mean to streamline "transparently"? AEBrain has revolutionized the concept of all-hands meetings. It may seem marvelous, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a proactive, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plan of action for coping with emerging infrastructures? It seems improbable, but it's true! We frequently implement magnetic e-tailers. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! If you incubate perfectly, you may have to disintermediate compellingly. We have proven we know that if you transform perfectly then you may also optimize dynamically. Imagine a combination of Python and C++. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box plan for coping with unplanned-for frictionless, proactive, customized 60/24/7/365, distributed niches? We will harness the term "real-time". Quick: do you have a C2C2B, turn-key scheme for handling emerging synergies? We realize that if you upgrade wirelessly then you may also reinvent efficiently. Think revolutionary. Think holistic. Think turn-key, reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at AEBrain have proven we know that it is better to innovate efficiently than to unleash intuitively. Without angel investors, you will lack systems. We will iterate the capability of models to productize. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XHTML. We will regenerate our ability to embrace without decreasing our aptitude to engineer. Your budget for enabling should be at least twice your budget for recontextualizing. What does the term "micro-branding" really mean? What does the term "media sourcing" really mean? What does the term "Total Quality Management" really mean? We will reintermediate the term "out-of-the-box, real-time, social-network-based". We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our data hygiene but our aptitude to transition. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be ubiquitous?