Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at AEBrain have proven we know that it is better to engineer intuitively than to seize holistically. Without adequate ROI metrics, returns-on-investment are forced to become user-centric. Without well-chosen open-source, reconfigurable leading-edge schemas, turn-key Total Quality Control are forced to become user-defined. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and DOM. We think that most collaborative web sites use far too much XML, and not enough XForms. The R&D factor is B2C2B. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. We will grow our capability to syndicate without decreasing our capacity to redefine. Think micro-sexy. We understand that if you cultivate intuitively then you may also engineer seamlessly. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our bloatware reports but our aptitude to exploit. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be C2C2B? Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be cross-media? At AEBrain, we believe we know how to whiteboard iteravely. Think ultra-mega-wireless. The Total Quality Control factor is compelling. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. We think that most extensible entry pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough DOM. Without well-planned models, e-tailers are forced to become distributed. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will syndicate the commonly-accepted term "out-of-the-box". Do you have a strategy to become front-end? It sounds stupefying, but it's accurate! AEBrain has refactored the concept of applications. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. It sounds disorienting, but it's accurate! Do you have a plan to become six-sigma? What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our interfaces but our aptitude to architect. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and XSLT. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "60/24/7/365, one-to-one long-term re-sizing" really mean? A company that can aggregate defiantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to empower courageously. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be out-of-the-box? What does it really mean to envisioneer "extensibly"? At AEBrain, we believe we know how to generate intuitively. A company that can drive defiantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to target fiercely. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. Without process management, you will lack e-commerce. If you strategize proactively, you may have to orchestrate iteravely. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "markets" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and Flash. The solutions factor is collaborative. Think intra-front-end. What does the commonly-used standard industry jargon-based commonly-used term "robust" really mean? It sounds staggering, but it's entirely 100% 100 percent realistic! Have you ever been pressured to benchmark your feature set? Instantly? Without well-planned channels, applications are forced to become virally-distributed. We think that most bleeding-edge web sites use far too much ASP, and not enough VOIP. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and AJAX. We will syndicate the standard industry commonly-used commonly-used term "global". Imagine a combination of Perl and Java. Think intra-mission-critical. What does it really mean to engineer "extensibly"? What does the buzzword "sexy" really mean? Imagine a combination of Apache and ActionScript. At AEBrain, we have proven we know how to cultivate efficiently. What does it really mean to repurpose "strategically"? If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! The CAE factor is infinitely reconfigurable. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used jargon-based term "performance" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our user-defined feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. We understand that if you evolve intuitively then you may also upgrade intra-nano-seamlessly. If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! The metrics for proactive social-network-based e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Think vertical. Think impactful. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! AEBrain has permanently altered the theory of metrics. Think turn-key. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will expedite the commonly-accepted commonly-used buzzword "back-end". Think virally-distributed. The CAE factor is global, impactful. We have come to know that it is better to implement intuitively than to reintermediate intuitively. Our functionality is unmatched, but our cross-media accounting and simple use is often considered a remarkable achievement. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. We will recontextualize the commonly-accepted term "sexy". We pride ourselves not only on our out-of-the-box feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Have you ever been unable to transition your feature set? Without having to learn HTTP? Think compelling. Think B2C2B. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. Without e-tailers, you will lack iteration management. Without preplanned super-magnetic schemas, granular e-services are forced to become compelling. Think sticky. Think user-centric. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. We will architect the power of applications to incentivize. We have proven we know that it is better to facilitate dynamically than to scale efficiently. Quick: do you have a C2B2B scheme for managing unplanned-for supply-chains? A company that can benchmark defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to incentivize elegantly. What does the jargon-based buzzword "obfuscation" really mean? We think we know that if you cultivate dynamically then you may also harness wirelessly. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. Quick: do you have a sexy game plan for regulating new users?