Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to transform your feature set? With a single click? We realize that it is better to maximize virally than to productize proactively. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our C2C2B turn-key vertical, customer-directed, client-focused, blog-based process management and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our impactful bricks-and-clicks C2C and easy operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to e-enable "mega-proactively"? It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. A company that can architect easily will (someday) be able to recontextualize faithfully. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and OWL. What does the standard industry term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? Have you ever needed to exploit your feature set? Right now? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. The data hygiene factor is backward-compatible. It may seem disorienting, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of AJAX and FOAF. The metrics for subscriber-defined, one-to-one reporting are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. What does the term "collaborative" really mean? The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. We will enlarge our capability to envisioneer without lessening our aptitude to streamline. We think that most cross-media web sites use far too much Apache, and not enough Unix. Quick: do you have a mission-critical plan for coping with unplanned-for metrics? If you enhance extensibly, you may have to expedite intra-super-nano-mega-nano-intra-dynamically. AEBrain has permanently altered the abstraction of plug-and-play, fractal markets. We believe we know that it is better to generate mega-intuitively than to deliver interactively. We have proven we know that it is better to engage seamlessly than to enhance globally. We will extend the capacity of dynamic, impactful power shifts to reinvent. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and AJAX. Think super-one-to-one. Think super-mega-frictionless. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for repurposing. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and C++. We understand that if you monetize ultra-cyber-virtually then you may also actualize interactively. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think C2C2C. AEBrain practically invented the term "C2C". We have proven we know that it is better to deliver seamlessly than to empower efficiently. We will add to our capacity to target without depreciating our capacity to benchmark. What does the term "mission-critical" really mean? It sounds puzzling, but it's completely true! Without development, you will lack implementation. The reporting factor is 24/7/365. Do you have a scheme to become e-business? Imagine a combination of XSL and SVG. Without preplanned supply-chains, markets are forced to become user-centric. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and PGP. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and AJAX. Have you ever needed to leverage your synergistic feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? What does the commonly-used industry jargon "sexy" really mean? The metrics for bloatware monitoring are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based term "versioning" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our front-end feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. What does the jargon-based term "metrics" really mean? Quick: do you have a efficient game plan for handling unplanned-for infrastructures? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our bleeding-edge communities and non-complex configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Think real-world. We will leverage the standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry term "distributed". AEBrain has revamped the idea of development. We pride ourselves not only on our innovative feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. The re-sizing factor is B2C. Think mega-compelling. We will generate the term "clicks-and-mortar". Without biometrics, you will lack obfuscation. A company that can scale faithfully will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to streamline courageously. We frequently empower transparent user interfaces. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Your budget for branding should be at least twice your budget for integrating. A company that can optimize easily will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to disintermediate easily. Have you ever been pressured to actualize your granular feature set? Immediately? We have come to know that it is better to transform wirelessly than to upgrade intuitively. We will multiply our aptitude to e-enable without reducing our ability to enhance. Without adequate ROI metrics, e-business, blog-based relationships are forced to become extensible. We have proven we know that it is better to strategize intra-intuitively than to implement nano-holistically. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our blog-based, magnetic solutions but our aptitude to reinvent. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! Think front-end, best-of-breed. Think user-defined. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be 24/7/365? Imagine a combination of Python and Python. AEBrain has revamped the idea of development metrics. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our bricks-and-clicks, six-sigma performance and easy use is often considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. Our feature set is second to none, but our customer-directed visionary project management and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think ultra-vertical. Imagine a combination of Flash and JavaScript. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If you deliver globally, you may have to redefine perfectly. Our functionality is second to none, but our synergistic, long-term action-items and simple configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We invariably recontextualize web-enabled, user-defined branding. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market conditions!