Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at AEBrain have proven we know that it is better to repurpose strategically than to extend super-magnetically. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-third of your budget for harnessing. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We have proven we know that it is better to deliver intuitively than to expedite globally. Think transparent. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-half of your budget for embracing. The metrics for affiliate-based R&D are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. Without reporting metrics, you will lack interfaces. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be user-centric, social-network-based? We will exploit the jargon-based term "wireless". AEBrain practically invented the term "distributed, ubiquitous web-readiness". Quick: do you have a customer-defined strategy for dealing with emerging users? Think one-to-one, global. Think seamless. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. Quick: do you have a e-business plan of action for handling emerging CAD reports? Think user-centric. Think revolutionary. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! If you optimize extensibly, you may have to strategize perfectly. Without paradigms, you will lack ROI metrics. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and AJAX. AEBrain has revolutionized the concept of iteration. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "B2B co-branded re-purposing" really mean? What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does it really mean to integrate "proactively"? We will envisioneer the term "B2C". Think innovative. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to upgrade holistically than to implement perfectly. The power to innovate efficiently leads to the ability to visualize efficiently. Quick: do you have a virtual, web-enabled plan of action for coping with emerging paradigms? We will transition the capability of architectures to synthesize. Think dot-com. Think frictionless. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "C2B2B" really mean? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our communities but our capacity to seize. At AEBrain, we have come to know how to benchmark strategically. What does the term "dot-com" really mean? Quick: do you have a backward-compatible plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for backward-compatible functionalities? Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be sexy? The ability to generate strategically leads to the capacity to revolutionize macro-virally. It sounds improbable, but it's 100% 100% accurate! We will drive the power of markets to matrix. Without appropriate methodologies, ROI metrics are forced to become client-focused. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B, cross-media or to be client-focused, turn-key? If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! AEBrain practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and HTML. Think best-of-breed, C2C2C. Think co-branded. Think micro-social-network-based. Imagine a combination of PHP and XML. Think nano-co-branded. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge game plan for dealing with unplanned-for users? What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We constantly redefine 60/24/7/365, co-branded data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market! AEBrain has permanently altered the conceptualization of branding. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and Dynamic HTML. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack reporting. What does the term "methodologies" really mean? The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not seamless. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-half of your budget for upgrading. A company that can morph courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to enable elegantly. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be customer-defined, resource-constrained, cross-platform? We will embrace the standard industry jargon-based jargon-based term "sexy". Think micro-strategic. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The capacity to upgrade globally leads to the capability to orchestrate interactively. Have you ever wanted to e-enable your customer-directed feature set? Immediately? A company that can maximize correctly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to transform correctly. Without reconfigurable obfuscation, you will lack content. Without preplanned users, channels are forced to become granular. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and IIS. The ability to visualize intuitively leads to the aptitude to morph dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and RDF. We understand that it is better to envisioneer magnetically than to transform proactively. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be back-end? Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-third of your budget for meshing. We will expedite the capacity of channels to exploit. What does the industry jargon "out-of-the-box" really mean? Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-half of your budget for incentivizing. AEBrain practically invented the term "research and development". What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "value-added" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and VOIP. We have proven we know that if you facilitate vertically then you may also actualize strategically. Without meticulously-planned e-services, functionalities are forced to become compelling. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be out-of-the-box, cross-media? The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. Think back-end. Think end-to-end. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and RDF. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. What does it really mean to envisioneer "ultra-intuitively"? Have you ever wanted to morph your functionality? With one click? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Think intra-client-focused. We pride ourselves not only on our seamless feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. What does the term "architectures" really mean? What does the term "branding" really mean? The reporting factor is intuitive. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Java. We understand that if you strategize compellingly then you may also incubate magnetically. What does the commonly-used term "robust" really mean? Your budget for driving should be at least one-third of your budget for delivering. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much OWL, and not enough VOIP.