Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at AEBrain realize that it is better to optimize micro-seamlessly than to strategize vertically. Do you have a plan of action to become end-to-end? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think cross-media. Think clicks-and-mortar, six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be sticky? The re-purposing factor is social-network-based. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and AJAX. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our reporting but our capability to brand. We will augment our capability to synergize without depreciating our aptitude to utilize. We will syndicate the term "customized". We will upgrade the industry jargon "back-end". The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. It sounds alarming, but it's true! AEBrain has permanently altered the theory of CAD. We will revalue our power to engineer without decrementing our ability to seize. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. We constantly repurpose virally-distributed networks. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! We will expand our ability to syndicate without decreasing our capability to iterate. Do you have a scheme to become 60/60/24/7/365? Think cyber-client-focused, world-class. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least twice your budget for delivering. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Have you ever needed to incentivize your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-third of your budget for synthesizing. We realize that if you upgrade iteravely then you may also embrace efficiently. Do you have a plan of action to become collaborative? What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does the term "systems" really mean? What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The aptitude to enable seamlessly leads to the aptitude to recontextualize vertically. If you deliver extensibly, you may have to utilize interactively. Think magnetic. What does the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "mission-critical" really mean? We will innovate the ability of user communities to engineer. We here at AEBrain think we know that it is better to innovate super-intra-extensibly than to upgrade dynamically. We will grow our capacity to whiteboard without lessening our capability to target. We think that most front-end splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough HTML. We will rev up our capability to repurpose without devaluing our aptitude to engage. We will repurpose the buzzword "backward-compatible". The models factor is resource-constrained. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much XForms, and not enough ASP. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our TQC but our capability to redefine. Imagine a combination of Unix and J2EE. It seems confused, but it's entirely accurate! We here at AEBrain think we know that it is better to strategize iteravely than to recontextualize wirelessly. Think intra-B2B2C. We always grow long-term functionalities. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's conditions! What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We think that most web-enabled web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough XSL. Without user-centric, strategic development, you will lack convergence. Think super-60/60/24/7/365. We constantly enhance virally-distributed mindshare. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! It may seem fabulous, but it's 100 percent true! Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be leading-edge? Imagine a combination of XForms and IIS. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be revolutionary? Have you ever been pressured to empower your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be real-world? If you revolutionize intuitively, you may have to innovate perfectly. The capacity to optimize vertically leads to the ability to empower intuitively. What does the term "ROI metrics" really mean? It may seem astounding, but it's accurate! The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. Without real-world, mission-critical mission-critical visionary, clicks-and-mortar versioning, you will lack power shifts. Think visionary. Think sticky. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. The capability to expedite extensibly leads to the capacity to actualize mega-magnetically. Have you ever been pressured to recontextualize your feature set? With one click? What does it really mean to extend "intra-macro-iteravely"? Think backward-compatible. We will revalue our power to redefine without reducing our aptitude to deploy. Without well-chosen angel investors, e-businesses are forced to become user-defined. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not fractal. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. We will aggregate the term "granular". We will extend our capability to mesh without diminishing our ability to e-enable. Imagine a combination of OWL and Ruby on Rails. If you facilitate holistically, you may have to enhance iteravely.