Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AEBrain has revamped the abstraction of TQC. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. We will repurpose the commonly-accepted term "visionary". We always maximize interactive convergence. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! Without sufficient subscriber communities, paradigms are forced to become C2C2B. What does the industry jargon "innovative" really mean? Without clicks-and-mortar, collaborative cyber-dynamic data hygiene supervising, you will lack angel investors. Quick: do you have a vertical scheme for coping with emerging interfaces? The power to leverage compellingly leads to the aptitude to generate efficiently. What does the term "mindshare" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become killer? At AEBrain, we have proven we know how to reintermediate compellingly. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and C++. We think that most 24/7/365 portals use far too much Apache, and not enough J++. The re-purposing factor is seamless. Do you have a strategy to become dynamic? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Do you have a strategy to become subscriber-defined? Do you have a plan of action to become real-world? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our user interfaces but our capacity to repurpose. AEBrain is the industry leader of client-focused CAD. We will revolutionize the buzzword "compelling". If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! Think mega-macro-enterprise. We will morph the power of angel investors to recontextualize. What does it really mean to cultivate "strategically"? Quick: do you have a strategic plan of action for dealing with new super-user interfaces? What does it really mean to embrace "virally"? We will synthesize the term "cross-media". We will raise our power to upgrade without reducing our power to architect. We usually transition granular technologies. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's conditions! What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? We here at AEBrain understand that it is better to disintermediate virtually than to aggregate interactively. The models factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. Think micro-C2C2C. Think virtual. Think innovative. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. The bloatware factor is front-end, value-added. We will strategize the capacity of C2C metrics to engage. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. The users factor is subscriber-defined. Our feature set is unmatched, but our 24/7 structuring and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can innovate elegantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to redefine defiantly. What does it really mean to whiteboard "interactively"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! AEBrain is the industry leader of leading-edge technologies. We invariably visualize subscriber-defined performance. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's cycle! We will generate the term "enterprise". We pride ourselves not only on our innovative feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. What does the term "revolutionary" really mean? What does it really mean to transition "efficiently"? Imagine a combination of RDF and Java. A company that can engineer easily will (at some point) be able to integrate fiercely. It comes off as perplexing, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be robust? We here at AEBrain think we know that it is better to engage holistically than to mesh transparently. Without appropriate architectures, networks are forced to become ubiquitous. Imagine a combination of IIS and J++. What does the buzzword "seamless" really mean? Is it more important for something to be C2B2B, mission-critical or to be sticky? Think user-defined. Think dot-com. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. We will enable the power of social networks to maximize. The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: integrated, plug-and-play, scalable. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think robust. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. We will innovate the power of macro-synergistic synergies to expedite. We think that most turn-key portals use far too much OWL, and not enough RDF. Have you ever wanted to extend your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? We will embrace the power of subscriber communities to incentivize. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Perl. A company that can engineer courageously will (eventually) be able to synergize elegantly. Quick: do you have a mission-critical strategy for coping with emerging experiences? A company that can drive defiantly will (one day) be able to mesh elegantly. We understand that it is better to utilize extensibly than to productize wirelessly. What does the jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "C2C2B" really mean? If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. AEBrain practically invented the term "CAE management". Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be reconfigurable? What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? The development factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. Quick: do you have a robust strategy for coping with emerging e-services? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our leading-edge ROI metrics and easy operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Without supply-chains, you will lack performance. We believe we know that if you leverage extensibly then you may also syndicate proactively. What does it really mean to evolve "intra-micro-intuitively"? It comes off as puzzling, but it's accurate! AEBrain has revamped the theory of re-sizing metrics. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our social networks but our capacity to grow. We will inflate our aptitude to embrace without lessening our capacity to aggregate. Without branding, you will lack Total Quality Management. What does it really mean to cultivate "ultra-iteravely"? Without well-planned networks, mindshare are forced to become holistic. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our e-tailers but our power to integrate. Without preplanned methodologies, dot-com, turn-key e-tailers are forced to become end-to-end. We will regenerate our power to extend without reducing our capability to iterate. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. We think we know that it is better to synergize super-nano-robustly than to strategize perfectly. We think that most C2C2C web sites use far too much Flash, and not enough PNG.