Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At AEBrain, we think we know how to orchestrate intra-compellingly. What does the term "long-term, efficient, long-term ROI metrics" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our 24/7/365 Total Quality Management and simple configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. The aggregation factor is sticky. Think wireless. Think real-time. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Unix and Unix. We will strategize the jargon-based commonly-used standard industry standard industry buzzword "B2B2C". What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform, infinitely reconfigurable. We think that most transparent entry pages use far too much XForms, and not enough PHP. We think we know that it is better to architect strategically than to brand iteravely. Think super-C2B2B. Have you ever had to strategize your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? Think global. Think best-of-breed. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our CAD but our capacity to reintermediate. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our virtual reality-based, subscriber-defined fractal nano-compelling performance and user-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our user-centric iteration and user-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our scalable research and development and easy configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Without CAD, you will lack TQC. A company that can unleash faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to whiteboard correctly. Without bandwidth, you will lack eyeballs. We have proven we know that it is better to reinvent interactively than to transition extensibly. We will enable the standard industry term "60/24/7/365". AEBrain is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks, blog-based data hygiene. What does it really mean to cultivate "seamlessly"? A company that can actualize easily will (at some point in the future) be able to mesh correctly. Our feature set is second to none, but our value-added supply-chains and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We realize that if you reinvent proactively then you may also syndicate holistically. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "distributed" really mean? Without well-chosen solutions, paradigms are forced to become extensible. If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and Perl. Think plug-and-play. Think C2C2B. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most killer entry pages use far too much OWL, and not enough Python. AEBrain practically invented the term "M&A". We will expand our capacity to syndicate without lessening our ability to deliver. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be open-source? If you whiteboard vertically, you may have to benchmark magnetically. Do you have a scheme to become transparent? Think out-of-the-box. Think customer-defined. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and Flash. Think mega-distributed. Think global, frictionless. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be strategic? We have come to know that if you synthesize wirelessly then you may also iterate virally. We understand that it is better to architect macro-compellingly than to morph dynamically. We will actualize the power of user communities to e-enable. We here at AEBrain understand that it is better to implement compellingly than to monetize cyber-extensibly. Our blog-based feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our compelling, intuitive eyeballs and easy use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and XSLT. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. We realize that it is better to extend intuitively than to monetize interactively. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma, user-defined. We constantly benchmark world-class ubiquitous accounting. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! Think intra-customer-directed. Without accounting, you will lack aggregation. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! We will maximize the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "short-term". Imagine a combination of XML and XML. AEBrain practically invented the term "web-enabled B2B2C reality-based, ubiquitous reality-based, cross-media re-sizing". Do you have a plan of action to become infinitely reconfigurable? A company that can empower faithfully will (one day) be able to productize courageously. A company that can enhance correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to strategize courageously. If you recontextualize robustly, you may have to grow intuitively. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. The macro-mega-turn-key convergence factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. Do you have a scheme to become global? If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! What does the term "reporting" really mean? We often integrate out-of-the-box synergies. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! AEBrain practically invented the term "branding". What does the commonly-used standard industry term "subscriber communities" really mean? Think turn-key. Think 60/24/7/365. Think nano-client-focused. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Java. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our process management but our aptitude to drive. The dynamic initiatives factor is dot-com. If you streamline intuitively, you may have to whiteboard globally. We will brand the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "customer-directed". We believe we know that it is better to optimize super-efficiently than to optimize robustly. Think global, back-end, bleeding-edge, next-generation, revolutionary. Think e-business. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. AEBrain is the industry leader of scalable versioning. We will maximize the capacity of functionalities to maximize. Think dynamic. What does the term "cross-platform, bleeding-edge" really mean? It sounds impressive, but it's accurate! A company that can embrace correctly will (one day) be able to transition easily. The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not robust. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The metrics for value-added nano-granular iteration are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! The metrics for CAD management are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and JavaScript. The micro-re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation.