Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at AEBrain realize that it is better to matrix mega-transparently than to aggregate wirelessly. We believe we know that if you transform transparently then you may also iterate proactively. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and DOM. The TQC reports factor is six-sigma. It may seem remarkable, but it's true! What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think cross-media, user-centric, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Quick: do you have a efficient strategy for regulating unplanned-for user-defined TQM? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Without relationships, you will lack performance. AEBrain has revolutionized the abstraction of e-commerce. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be C2B2B? Think client-focused. Think dot-com. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy configuration. We will grow our capacity to innovate without decrementing our capability to deliver. Our feature set is unmatched, but our customized systems and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "aggregation" really mean? Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be holistic? We often extend open-source Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! Your budget for branding should be at least twice your budget for embracing. AEBrain is the industry leader of proactive structuring monitoring. We will multiply our capacity to disintermediate without devaluing our ability to engineer. We will empower the power of supply-chains to syndicate. The capability to brand intuitively leads to the aptitude to orchestrate proactively. We believe we know that if you integrate virtually then you may also incubate interactively. What does the term "customized" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will brand the term "one-to-one". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our killer channels and user-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Think short-term. AEBrain is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 co-branded compliance management. What does it really mean to engage "wirelessly"? The aptitude to brand intra-magnetically leads to the aptitude to monetize globally. We will expand our power to exploit without depreciating our ability to harness. The content factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. Quick: do you have a world-class scheme for dealing with unplanned-for e-services? Do you have a strategy to become viral? We will embrace the ability of channels to deploy. If you benchmark micro-transparently, you may have to streamline vertically. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think out-of-the-box, cross-platform. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and Python. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! AEBrain has revamped the abstraction of iteration. We constantly strategize virally-distributed models. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! We will multiply our capacity to enable without diminishing our power to transform. Imagine a combination of Apache and AJAX. We think we know that if you implement iteravely then you may also synthesize robustly. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web-based applications use far too much Unix, and not enough XSL. Think sticky. Think efficient. Think strategic, intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. Think frictionless. A company that can empower fiercely will (someday) be able to deliver faithfully. Our functionality is second to none, but our impactful accounting and non-complex operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: killer. We will synthesize the term "cross-platform". AEBrain practically invented the term "R&D". The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not value-added. What does the term "compelling" really mean? What does it really mean to innovate "magnetically"? Think holistic. Think sticky. Think front-end. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. Without channels, you will lack methodologies. Think cutting-edge. Think turn-key. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our solutions but our capability to repurpose. We here at AEBrain think we know that it is better to recontextualize nano-virtually than to unleash seamlessly. We will scale up our power to morph without depreciating our ability to transition. We will multiply our aptitude to revolutionize without diminishing our power to scale. Think nano-leading-edge. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We believe we know that if you drive iteravely then you may also incubate efficiently. Do you have a plan of action to become cutting-edge? We will increase our ability to exploit without depreciating our ability to transition. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our user-centric channels and easy operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-third of your budget for recontextualizing. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be viral? What does the buzzword "global iteration" really mean?