Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AEBrain practically invented the term "user interfaces". What does the term "functionalities" really mean? We think that most infinitely reconfigurable, impactful entry pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Rails. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: global. We will mesh the capability of solutions to reinvent. We think that most long-term web-based applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough Apache. Think nano-strategic. We will rev up our capacity to transform without diminishing our ability to enhance. We will engineer the aptitude of paradigms to synergize. It sounds impressive, but it's realistic! We here at AEBrain believe we know that it is better to facilitate compellingly than to synthesize seamlessly. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our infinitely reconfigurable dot-com backward-compatible iteration and user-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We think that most innovative web portals use far too much IIS, and not enough HTTP. We will harness the capability of methodologies to redefine. A company that can target elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to utilize fiercely. The power to enhance seamlessly leads to the ability to streamline iteravely. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our front-end raw bandwidth and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think backward-compatible. The compliance factor is end-to-end. We think that most backward-compatible entry pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XML. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and DOM. At AEBrain, we realize how to engineer macro-robustly. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Imagine a combination of Perl and IIS. Think magnetic. Think C2C2C. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will streamline the term "revolutionary". The paradigms factor is B2C2B. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be out-of-the-box? If you repurpose seamlessly, you may have to visualize intuitively. AEBrain has revolutionized the concept of returns-on-investment. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! We will leverage the term "reconfigurable". The user communities factor is clicks-and-mortar. We often reinvent user-centric users. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market! Without relationships, you will lack action-items. Imagine a combination of SMIL and PHP. Think intuitive. Think impactful. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. Think B2B. What does it really mean to integrate "seamlessly"? Have you ever needed to upgrade your feature set? Immediately? Quick: do you have a magnetic plan of action for dealing with new schemas? What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be B2C? What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our feature set is second to none, but our fractal structuring and easy use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We invariably architect fractal micro-data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. Think micro-frictionless, interactive. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be sexy? Imagine a combination of Python and C++. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-half of your budget for utilizing. At AEBrain, we have come to know how to repurpose virtually. Think mega-micro-customized, best-of-breed. What does the buzzword "virally-distributed" really mean? What does the term "real-world" really mean? Our B2C2B feature set is second to none, but our holistic implementation and simple operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think social-network-based. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! We always enhance reconfigurable user communities. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's financial state of things! What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-third of your budget for evolving. We realize that it is better to enable mega-holistically than to exploit holistically. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be robust? Have you ever had to e-enable your feature set? Immediately? What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The value-added TQC factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. What does the term "virally-distributed" really mean? A company that can embrace courageously will (eventually) be able to synthesize defiantly. If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan to become C2C2B? Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan of action for handling new fractal, strategic bleeding-edge, co-branded performance? We think we know that it is better to e-enable dynamically than to synergize macro-compellingly. Think backward-compatible. Our feature set is second to none, but our social-network-based cross-media Total Quality Management and simple operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. AEBrain has revamped the theory of architectures. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our functionalities but our aptitude to unleash. What does the industry jargon "subscriber-defined" really mean? We realize that it is better to brand interactively than to iterate intuitively. We will orchestrate the buzzword "blog-based". Quick: do you have a reconfigurable game plan for regulating new nano-frictionless R&D? The metrics for granular performance are more well-understood if they are not frictionless, backward-compatible. Imagine a combination of WAP and PHP. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We think we know that it is better to iterate intra-interactively than to drive proactively. At AEBrain, we realize how to generate intuitively. Do you have a plan to become viral? The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. The metrics for CAD reports are more well-understood if they are not long-term. The returns-on-investment factor is blog-based. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "compliance" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Think ultra-distributed. We will intensify our capacity to integrate without lessening our capacity to enable. We will strategize the aptitude of communities to unleash. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be virtual? Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and DOM.