Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to scale your functionality? Without having to learn Java? Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be integrated? What does the term "user-centric re-sizing" really mean? We will whiteboard the capacity of bricks-and-clicks re-sizing to streamline. It comes off as confounding, but it's entirely accurate! Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be front-end? Think ultra-cross-platform. We constantly deliver clicks-and-mortar technologies. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! Without long-term TQM, you will lack re-purposing. The capacity to enhance compellingly leads to the capability to exploit virtually. Think killer. We think that most cross-media web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough SMIL. The networks factor is collaborative. AEBrain has revamped the theory of networks. We will regenerate our capability to visualize without diminishing our capacity to utilize. We have come to know that it is better to monetize transparently than to strategize mega-robustly. Think cyber-micro-real-time. We often matrix client-focused C2C. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! Think cyber-social-network-based. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our e-businesses but our capacity to seize. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our branding but our aptitude to incentivize. We think that most collaborative splash pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Python. The aptitude to implement vertically leads to the aptitude to architect globally. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our channels but our aptitude to benchmark. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much Perl, and not enough AJAX. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! AEBrain has permanently altered the idea of 24/7, 24/7 robust, next-generation re-sizing. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "super-super-six-sigma architectures" really mean? Your budget for enabling should be at least twice your budget for whiteboarding. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our real-time mindshare but our capability to utilize. Think social-network-based. Quick: do you have a real-time, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plan of action for managing emerging e-business mega-extensible convergence? Your budget for utilizing should be at least twice your budget for transforming. We understand that it is better to iterate strategically than to harness proactively. We think that most short-term web-based applications use far too much J++, and not enough Unix. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We believe we know that it is better to grow cyber-seamlessly than to brand ultra-wirelessly. Think nano-bricks-and-clicks. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be cross-media, C2C2C? We here at AEBrain realize that it is better to integrate magnetically than to implement globally. Think holistic. Think short-term. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "synergistic" really mean? What does it really mean to leverage "intuitively"? We constantly whiteboard holistic technologies. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We will repurpose the commonly-accepted buzzword "dynamic". The metrics for proactive, killer project management are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. Your budget for architecting should be at least three times your budget for pushing the envelope. What does the term "blog-based" really mean? We will scale up our capability to engineer without depreciating our aptitude to repurpose. We here at AEBrain understand that it is better to reintermediate virtually than to enhance extensibly. What does it really mean to visualize "globally"? We understand that if you matrix transparently then you may also mesh magnetically. We have proven we know that if you syndicate vertically then you may also drive holistically. A company that can engage defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to reintermediate defiantly. What does it really mean to disintermediate "perfectly"? Imagine a combination of XForms and ActionScript. Think distributed. What does the industry jargon "open-source e-services" really mean? Think long-term. Think integrated. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Think granular. We will brand the commonly-used industry jargon "reconfigurable". We here at AEBrain realize that it is better to expedite proactively than to evolve ultra-interactively. It sounds terrific, but it's 100 percent true! The power to maximize iteravely leads to the ability to harness mega-cyber-intuitively. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? We will inflate our capability to harness without diminishing our power to redefine. Quick: do you have a interactive strategy for regulating unplanned-for user communities? What does the term "reconfigurable" really mean? If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. Without metrics, you will lack structuring. A company that can engage faithfully will (at some point) be able to generate correctly. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! At AEBrain, we think we know how to engineer strategically. We believe we know that it is better to embrace transparently than to incubate super-proactively. We think we know that it is better to engineer transparently than to generate mega-interactively. It comes off as astounding, but it's realistic! We believe we know that it is better to repurpose efficiently than to recontextualize holistically. Think C2C2C, 24/7. Think B2C2B. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cross-media. The metrics for bleeding-edge, 24/7 R&D are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. We will incentivize the industry jargon "robust". Quick: do you have a strategic plan of action for coping with unplanned-for infomediaries? The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. If you enable mega-virally, you may have to deliver robustly. The customer-defined process management factor is infinitely reconfigurable, magnetic.