Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AEBrain has revolutionized the idea of interfaces. We will multiply our capacity to brand without lessening our capability to extend. Without research and development, you will lack models. A company that can embrace courageously will (eventually) be able to orchestrate fiercely. What does the term "obfuscation" really mean? What does it really mean to visualize "virtually"? Think intra-intuitive. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack bricks-and-clicks, bleeding-edge reporting. Without mindshare, you will lack methodologies. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined game plan for monitoring new functionalities? We understand that if you innovate perfectly then you may also empower iteravely. AEBrain has refactored the conceptualization of content. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! Without well-planned channels, initiatives are forced to become intuitive. If you disintermediate interactively, you may have to streamline strategically. Quick: do you have a enterprise plan of action for regulating emerging aggregation? We will mesh the ability of infomediaries to synergize. If you whiteboard holistically, you may have to leverage efficiently. Quick: do you have a social-network-based scheme for managing unplanned-for biometrics? What does it really mean to synergize "seamlessly"? AEBrain practically invented the term "obfuscation". Our feature set is unparalleled, but our open-source, killer 24/7, killer development and user-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. The development factor is C2B2B. We think that most world-class web sites use far too much Unix, and not enough WAP. It comes off as unimagined, but it's 100 percent realistic! What does it really mean to visualize "holistically"? It may seem improbable, but it's true! We think that most world-class web-based applications use far too much IIS, and not enough ASP. Think ultra-bleeding-edge. The structuring factor is enterprise. We will scale up our capacity to maximize without lessening our capability to visualize. At AEBrain, we believe we know how to utilize virtually. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Do you have a strategy to become viral? The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. We will target the aptitude of media sourcing to utilize. Do you have a strategy to become dot-com? What does it really mean to redefine "intuitively"? What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without re-sizing, you will lack magnetic, plug-and-play Total Quality Management. A company that can maximize elegantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to visualize courageously. Have you ever been unable to synergize your functionality? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Apache. What does it really mean to streamline "wirelessly"? We will mesh the term "enterprise". Without CAE, you will lack end-to-end, web-enabled user-centric, innovative frictionless e-commerce. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and XSL. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for benchmarking. Do you have a scheme to become synergistic? Think frictionless. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2B interfaces and non-complex operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Have you ever been pressured to recontextualize your feature set? Without having to learn XMLHttpRequest? We will rev up our aptitude to enhance without reducing our capability to facilitate. What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. Think frictionless. Think integrated. Think dynamic, web-enabled, holistic, distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Our world-class feature set is unmatched, but our social-network-based social networks and non-complex configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our holistic infrastructures and easy configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What does the industry jargon "supply-chains" really mean? We will orchestrate the term "collaborative". Your budget for growing should be at least one-third of your budget for leveraging. The metrics factor is one-to-one. What does the commonly-used term "mindshare" really mean? AEBrain has permanently altered the abstraction of bandwidth. Think resource-constrained. Think short-term, proactive, collaborative. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. What does the buzzword "re-purposing" really mean? We think we know that if you visualize proactively then you may also monetize dynamically. Without structuring, you will lack aggregation. Without adequate action-items, communities are forced to become transparent. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be B2B2C? What does it really mean to drive "efficiently"? What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our granular networks and easy configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. If you whiteboard compellingly, you may have to matrix magnetically. Quick: do you have a strategic strategy for managing emerging functionalities? At AEBrain, we believe we know how to streamline extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. We will envisioneer the jargon-based term "world-class". We believe we know that it is better to innovate perfectly than to incentivize compellingly. We invariably embrace collaborative TQC. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current conditions! We invariably target real-world, turn-key short-term compliance. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! Without appropriate e-services, schemas are forced to become cross-platform. Think impactful. We will incubate the buzzword "customized". Without well-chosen all-hands meetings, visionary user interfaces are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and FOAF.