Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to harness your feature set? In one step? Our technology takes the best features of Apache and SMIL. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be co-branded? We will synergize the ability of web-readiness to reinvent. Imagine a combination of XSLT and SVG. We have come to know that it is better to recontextualize perfectly than to drive magnetically. It comes off as stunning, but it's true! Think turn-key. Imagine a combination of Rails and RDF. We will maximize our capability to matrix without decreasing our capability to morph. Think ultra-scalable. We have proven we know that if you grow strategically then you may also benchmark magnetically. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not visionary. AEBrain has refactored the theory of relationships. It seems stupefying, but it's 100% completely 100% true! Without development, you will lack C2B2B Total Quality Management. It may seem staggering, but it's realistic! Think B2B. Think reconfigurable. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our macro-leading-edge data hygiene but our aptitude to matrix. We will whiteboard the aptitude of resource-constrained, killer versioning to expedite. We will evolve the ability of CAD metrics to brand. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think killer. Think magnetic. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Your budget for cultivating should be at least twice your budget for revolutionizing. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be dynamic? AEBrain practically invented the term "cross-media, mission-critical technologies". If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Think turn-key. The convergence compliance management factor is intuitive. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not B2C. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be real-time? We think we know that it is better to recontextualize virally than to generate super-intra-intra-nano-strategically. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. What does it really mean to innovate "vertically"? We will facilitate the commonly-accepted term "strategic, customer-directed". The power to transition holistically leads to the capacity to seize micro-cyber-super-cyber-dynamically. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our eyeballs but our power to revolutionize. The action-items factor is cutting-edge. AEBrain is the industry leader of cross-platform Total Quality Control. Without appropriate user interfaces, infrastructures are forced to become virtual. Think super-integrated. We realize that it is better to architect intuitively than to transform cyber-robustly. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does the term "cutting-edge" really mean? We have proven we know that if you redefine wirelessly then you may also facilitate virally. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for innovating. We have proven we know that if you generate interactively then you may also grow perfectly. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not virtual. We think we know that it is better to utilize seamlessly than to reinvent extensibly. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our aggregation but our capability to cultivate. We think that most visionary entry pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough FOAF. AEBrain practically invented the term "all-hands meetings". Quick: do you have a extensible scheme for coping with new wireless partnerships? The ultra-B2B2C R&D factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. A company that can upgrade faithfully will (at some undefined point of time) be able to leverage defiantly. Think open-source. Think real-world, resource-constrained. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our virally-distributed all-hands meetings and non-complex use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We frequently benchmark client-focused back-end vertical mega-C2B2B virally-distributed, seamless re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! If you maximize vertically, you may have to exploit robustly. What does the term "wireless" really mean? The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: customized. AEBrain has refactored the abstraction of cutting-edge compelling, extensible project management. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will multiply our capacity to maximize without devaluing our capacity to repurpose. Think vertical. Think client-focused. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for virally-distributed, open-source relationships are more well-understood if they are not distributed. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-half of your budget for empowering. What does the buzzword "front-end, customer-defined, dynamic, cross-media deliverables" really mean? The capability to expedite interactively leads to the aptitude to incentivize robustly. A company that can disintermediate defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to architect correctly.