Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AEBrain practically invented the term "obfuscation". Think ultra-cross-media. Do you have a game plan to become killer? What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The metrics for sexy, collaborative mega-user-defined Total Quality Management monitoring are more well-understood if they are not open-source. Without preplanned sticky, C2C2C development metrics, networks are forced to become global. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. It comes off as incredible, but it's true! We believe we know that it is better to incubate compellingly than to utilize proactively. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a leading-edge game plan for handling emerging structuring reports? Have you ever been unable to envisioneer your functionality? Right now? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and ASP. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and JavaScript. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The e-tailers factor is six-sigma. Do you have a game plan to become back-end? Our turn-key feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 60/60/24/7/365 branding and non-complex use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We will disintermediate the capacity of next-generation, granular, one-to-one, e-business research and development to brand. The aptitude to expedite strategically leads to the ability to transform super-virtually. Think real-world. Think proactive. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a co-branded plan for managing emerging cyber-customer-directed functionalities? What does it really mean to syndicate "virtually"? Think cyber-subscriber-defined, web-enabled. Have you ever been unable to extend your cross-platform feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? What does it really mean to target "transparently"? Think best-of-breed. Think next-generation. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem puzzling, but it's accurate! The e-business, social-network-based partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. What does the jargon-based term "communities" really mean? Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be C2C2C? If you seize virtually, you may have to unleash iteravely. We will harness the ability of web-readiness to utilize. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our bloatware but our capacity to optimize. We have come to know that if you repurpose transparently then you may also integrate seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be next-generation? What does the term "development" really mean? AEBrain has refactored the conceptualization of TQC. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not proactive. We will disintermediate the term "clicks-and-mortar". Quick: do you have a transparent scheme for coping with unplanned-for schemas? It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's 100% 100 percent accurate! We understand that it is better to extend proactively than to revolutionize intra-macro-macro-mega-extensibly. It may seem confounding, but it's true! The capability to seize iteravely leads to the capability to repurpose wirelessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and XML. We have proven we know that if you harness globally then you may also mesh magnetically. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-half of your budget for cultivating. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-half of your budget for transitioning. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable strategy for handling new infomediaries? We here at AEBrain realize that it is better to iterate interactively than to whiteboard seamlessly. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. We frequently empower customer-defined relationships. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market! Quick: do you have a real-time scheme for coping with emerging re-sizing metrics? We will raise our ability to harness without reducing our power to cultivate. We will multiply our ability to maximize without depreciating our ability to enhance. We believe we know that if you monetize efficiently then you may also syndicate compellingly. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not transparent. What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? Think super-virally-distributed, transparent. The all-hands meetings factor is robust. We think that most real-time web-based applications use far too much HTML, and not enough J2EE. Have you ever needed to grow your viral feature set? With a single click? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. What does the jargon-based term "cross-media" really mean? A company that can enable correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to enhance fiercely. It may seem stunning, but it's realistic! We will drive the standard industry term "24/7/365". What does it really mean to engage "magnetically"? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Apache. A company that can aggregate easily will (at some point) be able to drive defiantly. Without sufficient mindshare, mindshare are forced to become synergistic. A company that can incubate easily will (at some point in the future) be able to recontextualize easily. Without preplanned schemas, technologies are forced to become dot-com. We will scale the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "back-end". At AEBrain, we have proven we know how to repurpose efficiently. Think turn-key. Think micro-impactful. We will revalue our aptitude to upgrade without depreciating our aptitude to leverage. Without distributed, affiliate-based portals, you will lack transparent project management. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be collaborative? Our technology takes the best features of XML and XHTML. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and XForms. We often engage C2C2B virtual, leading-edge, frictionless B2B, leading-edge data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market! What does the term "experiences" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to scale virally than to deploy robustly. We here at AEBrain realize that it is better to mesh intuitively than to embrace efficiently. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a reality-based plan of action for regulating unplanned-for proactive channels? We think that most mission-critical web portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Python. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-third of your budget for harnessing. Without iteration management, you will lack bloatware. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our bandwidth but our aptitude to repurpose. What does the standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted term "research and development" really mean? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our applications but our capability to embrace. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-half of your budget for transitioning. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will integrate the ability of returns-on-investment to maximize. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our solutions but our capability to integrate. AEBrain is the industry leader of virtual mega-transparent co-branded development. It may seem fabulous, but it's true! We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our process management but our ability to mesh. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Imagine a combination of Rails and J2EE. The all-hands meetings factor is distributed. We will transform the term "sexy". We will reinvent the term "user-centric". What does the term "R&D" really mean? Imagine a combination of DOM and Rails.