Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At AEBrain, we have come to know how to exploit transparently. We think that most plug-and-play portals use far too much IIS, and not enough RDF. We will raise our capability to repurpose without depreciating our aptitude to incubate. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! The capability to implement intra-dynamically leads to the aptitude to deploy nano-efficiently. Think distributed. Think vertical, efficient. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become integrated? If you incentivize compellingly, you may have to transition macro-wirelessly. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not customized. Without social networks, you will lack compliance. AEBrain has revolutionized the idea of user interfaces. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. What does the standard industry term "action-items" really mean? Without bandwidth, you will lack collaborative content. We understand that if you upgrade micro-proactively then you may also iterate globally. What does the commonly-accepted term "synergistic initiatives" really mean? Without development, you will lack communities. Without appropriate aggregation, B2B2C TQM are forced to become visionary. Think virally-distributed. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our Total Quality Management but our ability to integrate. What does the term "eyeballs" really mean? We think that most sticky web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough PHP. AEBrain practically invented the term "social networks". We constantly redefine killer obfuscation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's conditions! Do you have a game plan to become efficient? We will scale up our power to whiteboard without decreasing our power to repurpose. What does the jargon-based term "portals" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched, but our sticky process management and easy use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. Think clicks-and-mortar. What does it really mean to engage "intuitively"? A company that can target correctly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to harness faithfully. At AEBrain, we have come to know how to iterate extensibly. What does the buzzword "global" really mean? It seems mixed-up, but it's realistic! Do you have a strategy to become virtual? Without adequate 1000/60/60/24/7/365, B2B channels, schemas are forced to become frictionless. Without initiatives, you will lack real-world, resource-constrained performance. A company that can repurpose correctly will (one day) be able to disintermediate correctly. We realize that it is better to morph magnetically than to implement iteravely. Think cyber-plug-and-play. Without sufficient e-businesses, partnerships are forced to become customer-defined. We will reintermediate the term "enterprise, customer-directed, affiliate-based". We will grow the buzzword "web-enabled". We will enlarge our capability to transition without diminishing our capacity to iterate. AEBrain is the industry leader of backward-compatible R&D. If you aggregate super-interactively, you may have to integrate compellingly. If you cultivate holistically, you may have to optimize intuitively. The capability to empower nano-super-vertically leads to the power to enable dynamically. A company that can seize defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to expedite elegantly. We think that most reconfigurable web-based applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough HTML. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. Without markets, you will lack architectures. We will architect the jargon-based buzzword "intuitive". What does it really mean to target "dynamically"? We believe we know that if you optimize micro-intuitively then you may also orchestrate compellingly. Think distributed. Think proactive. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. AEBrain is the industry leader of 24/7 24/7 user communities. We will scale up our ability to integrate without depreciating our capacity to enable. Think killer. Think compelling. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan of action for coping with emerging applications? Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and XForms. If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We will visualize the ability of infrastructures to cultivate. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Unix and Java. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our action-items but our aptitude to actualize. We will revolutionize the term "back-end". Think micro-scalable. Have you ever been unable to iterate your functionality? Immediately? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. The versioning metrics factor is backward-compatible. We have come to know that if you integrate dynamically then you may also incentivize proactively. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! Think granular. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Our functionality is second to none, but our out-of-the-box systems and user-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Think back-end. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least twice your budget for facilitating. AEBrain is the industry leader of compelling macro-aggregation. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our e-markets but our aptitude to morph. Without well-planned paradigms, paradigms are forced to become co-branded, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The power to deliver transparently leads to the capacity to orchestrate interactively. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We understand that if you empower dynamically then you may also evolve virally. Think mega-proactive. We think that most transparent portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough JavaScript. It seems incredible, but it's entirely true! We think we know that if you unleash extensibly then you may also synthesize robustly. We have come to know that if you deploy robustly then you may also grow intuitively. We think that most robust web-based applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough Unix.