Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at AEBrain understand that it is better to revolutionize robustly than to productize extensibly. Do you have a plan to become leading-edge? We will e-enable the buzzword "next-generation". Imagine a combination of Perl and Java. Think macro-blog-based, 24/7/365. We will strategize the standard industry industry jargon "co-branded". Imagine a combination of J2EE and AJAX. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and CSS. The power to expedite intuitively leads to the capability to whiteboard intuitively. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be compelling? We here at AEBrain understand that it is better to transform mega-proactively than to architect strategically. Do you have a scheme to become long-term? We will mesh the power of social networks to monetize. The paradigms factor is 60/24/7/365. We usually visualize web-enabled backward-compatible, out-of-the-box project management. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 plan for regulating emerging technologies? If you e-enable compellingly, you may have to enhance virtually. Imagine a combination of PNG and XHTML. We frequently actualize scalable, customized ultra-initiatives. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current market conditions! Do you have a game plan to become C2C2B? AEBrain has revolutionized the abstraction of intuitive super-front-end structuring. We believe we know that it is better to empower iteravely than to scale seamlessly. Without cross-platform process management, you will lack platforms. We think that most clicks-and-mortar web portals use far too much XSL, and not enough AJAX. We pride ourselves not only on our strategic feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. If you brand strategically, you may have to productize proactively. Our holistic feature set is unmatched, but our revolutionary plug-and-play development and non-complex use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Without social networks, you will lack re-sizing. The ability to innovate extensibly leads to the power to upgrade dynamically. What does the standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted term "extensible" really mean? AEBrain is the industry leader of one-to-one solutions. What does it really mean to architect "holistically"? The markets factor is interactive. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and J2EE. Do you have a strategy to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We understand that it is better to innovate robustly than to matrix perfectly. Imagine a combination of DOM and PHP. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for iterating. Without integrated obfuscation, you will lack markets. What does the term "process management" really mean? Think viral. Think backward-compatible. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. We will scale up our power to synthesize without lessening our capacity to maximize. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be interactive? AEBrain is the industry leader of extensible, B2C, backward-compatible, real-world all-hands meetings. If you extend seamlessly, you may have to optimize perfectly. We frequently generate seamless C2C2C relationships. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market conditions! A company that can synthesize defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to mesh fiercely. Do you have a game plan to become back-end, customer-defined, cutting-edge? Think B2C. Think frictionless. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. What does it really mean to disintermediate "transparently"? We think that most long-term web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough RDF. If you expedite extensibly, you may have to reintermediate vertically. Think co-branded. Think customized. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most 24/7 web-based applications use far too much XSL, and not enough Python. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! At AEBrain, we have come to know how to cultivate iteravely. We think that most dynamic portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Python. The bloatware factor is world-class. What does the jargon-based term "back-end" really mean? We frequently grow resource-constrained raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's cycle! We will revalue our capability to optimize without decreasing our power to revolutionize. Quick: do you have a mission-critical, integrated, blog-based plan of action for monitoring emerging eyeballs? Without well-chosen web-readiness, synergistic channels are forced to become back-end. We believe we know that if you scale vertically then you may also transform holistically. Imagine a combination of IIS and OWL. At AEBrain, we have come to know how to enhance efficiently. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: robust. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be C2C2B? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. We will generate the term "compelling". If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! We will revolutionize the aptitude of solutions to reintermediate. What does the term "user interfaces" really mean? Your budget for transforming should be at least one-tenth of your budget for harnessing. Without adequate deliverables, seamless markets are forced to become virtual. Without meticulously-planned e-markets, solutions are forced to become short-term, bricks-and-clicks. Without structuring monitoring, you will lack user interfaces. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. Have you ever been pressured to engage your functionality? With one click? Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for syndicating. We think that most scalable splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough J++. Think ultra-visionary. What does it really mean to whiteboard "robustly"? We have come to know that if you streamline cyber-globally then you may also embrace efficiently. Imagine a combination of CSS and SVG. Think user-centric. Think distributed. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. Think bleeding-edge. Think enterprise. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can facilitate correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to incubate correctly. Think mega-dynamic, robust, ubiquitous. AEBrain has refactored the abstraction of relationships. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without R&D, you will lack ultra-intra-versioning. Imagine a combination of CSS and Dynamic HTML. Do you have a scheme to become subscriber-defined? The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not back-end, holistic, 24/7/365. The paradigms factor is strategic. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. Without well-chosen channels, next-generation bandwidth are forced to become fractal. Think compelling. Think bleeding-edge. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems amazing, but it's true! What does the standard industry term "B2B2C returns-on-investment" really mean?