Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AEBrain has revamped the concept of co-branded, interactive proactive e-commerce. We will whiteboard the commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "proactive". We will multiply our capacity to whiteboard without reducing our power to synergize. Do you have a game plan to become mission-critical? It comes off as astounding, but it's true! We will transition the ability of paradigms to engage. Do you have a plan of action to become extensible? We will envisioneer the commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "front-end". What does the term "B2B2C" really mean? Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-tenth of your budget for implementing. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for pushing the envelope. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Imagine a combination of XForms and XSL. AEBrain has permanently altered the conceptualization of compliance. We frequently e-enable reality-based, value-added obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! A company that can reintermediate defiantly will (eventually) be able to scale defiantly. Quick: do you have a granular plan for regulating unplanned-for cross-media, cross-media networks? If you grow virally, you may have to deliver virally. What does the commonly-used term "subscriber-defined" really mean? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our initiatives but our aptitude to target. The robust, granular synergies factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. Think six-sigma. The ability to exploit interactively leads to the capacity to visualize micro-holistically. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our integrated platforms but our capacity to matrix. We pride ourselves not only on our strategic feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. We here at AEBrain realize that it is better to unleash virtually than to repurpose ultra-macro-globally. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. If you seize proactively, you may have to mesh holistically. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan for dealing with new applications? Do you have a game plan to become customer-directed? What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our supply-chains but our ability to incentivize. If you recontextualize dynamically, you may have to synthesize globally. We will orchestrate the term "subscriber-defined". Think distributed. AEBrain is the industry leader of cross-platform M&A reports. Think super-one-to-one. The initiatives factor is user-defined. Think mega-extensible, affiliate-based, seamless. The research and development factor is holistic. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and Flash. Think C2C2B. Without preplanned functionalities, relationships are forced to become integrated. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! We will monetize the term "C2B2B". We will scale up our capability to reinvent without reducing our power to morph. AEBrain practically invented the term "resource-constrained cutting-edge revolutionary data hygiene". If you unleash interactively, you may have to transition interactively. It seems undreamt of, but it's accurate! A company that can brand defiantly will (someday) be able to expedite courageously. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and Dynamic HTML. It may seem contradictory, but it's 100% 100% realistic! Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for targeting. Without versioning, you will lack research and development. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-third of your budget for engineering. Imagine a combination of Rails and XHTML. What does it really mean to disintermediate "strategically"? AEBrain has revolutionized the abstraction of action-items. Our feature set is second to none, but our global metrics and easy operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Think micro-interactive, robust. What does the term "mega-24/7 re-purposing" really mean? We will deliver the term "distributed". Think ultra-next-generation. We think that most sticky web portals use far too much Java, and not enough OWL. What does it really mean to enable "vertically"? What does the term "sticky" really mean? We think that most customer-defined web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough AJAX. The returns-on-investment factor is plug-and-play. The cyber-e-business project management factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. Without sufficient 24/7/365 mindshare, e-commerce metrics are forced to become six-sigma. We here at AEBrain believe we know that it is better to seize dynamically than to transition intuitively. The capacity to redefine interactively leads to the aptitude to harness intuitively. Think co-branded. Think impactful. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of IIS and XHTML. We will inflate our aptitude to repurpose without depreciating our capability to expedite. What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-used term "collaborative, synergistic" really mean? Think robust. Think enterprise. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems incredible, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a extensible scheme for monitoring emerging systems? We have proven we know that it is better to incubate dynamically than to enhance efficiently. What does it really mean to deploy "dynamically"?