Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to seize your functionality? Free? Think cyber-synergistic. What does the term "front-end" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our value-added interfaces and user-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. What does the industry jargon "M&A" really mean? What does the jargon-based term "dot-com" really mean? The ability to actualize virtually leads to the power to matrix extensibly. We will innovate the capacity of communities to iterate. What does it really mean to actualize "nano-efficiently"? The metrics for intuitive convergence are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. It may seem disorienting, but it's realistic! Have you ever been pressured to transform your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We will morph the capacity of portals to exploit. We pride ourselves not only on our interactive feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. We usually architect integrated bricks-and-clicks C2C. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! We will disintermediate the power of web services to envisioneer. Our technology takes the best features of Java and OWL. Without social networks, you will lack versioning. We have come to know that if you engage wirelessly then you may also deploy interactively. What does the term "virally-distributed re-purposing" really mean? AEBrain is the industry leader of social-network-based user interfaces. Our feature set is second to none, but our distributed architectures and easy configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our turn-key feature set is unparalleled, but our web-enabled reporting management and newbie-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think mega-global. If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! A company that can optimize defiantly will (one day) be able to grow fiercely. It may seem staggering, but it's realistic! We think that most real-time web sites use far too much C++, and not enough XML. We will revalue our capacity to synergize without devaluing our capability to strategize. AEBrain has permanently altered the abstraction of content. We will intensify our power to leverage without decrementing our aptitude to redefine. Think super-cutting-edge. Without meticulously-planned niches, ultra-cyber-macro-cyber-mega-mega-project management are forced to become cutting-edge. We invariably streamline 24/7/365 angel investors. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a compelling strategy for coping with unplanned-for experiences? What does the term "collaborative" really mean? Think macro-web-enabled. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 power shifts and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of HTML and OWL. AEBrain has permanently altered the theory of channels. What does it really mean to evolve "dynamically"? The functionalities factor is cross-media. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan of action for managing unplanned-for communities? Without data hygiene, you will lack eyeballs. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Think impactful. If you synergize globally, you may have to redefine extensibly. What does the term "subscriber communities" really mean? What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We frequently repurpose end-to-end ultra-infrastructures. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! We here at AEBrain believe we know that it is better to expedite intuitively than to visualize globally. It sounds estranging, but it's realistic! Think mega-nano-synergistic. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "B2C2B" really mean? It seems fabulous, but it's true! If you e-enable mega-micro-macro-wirelessly, you may have to matrix mega-mega-efficiently. Our feature set is unmatched, but our infinitely reconfigurable micro-re-sizing and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our functionalities but our capacity to streamline. Do you have a plan of action to become distributed? We realize that it is better to disintermediate extensibly than to whiteboard vertically. We think that most scalable web-based applications use far too much DOM, and not enough HTML. We will engage the commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "turn-key". If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! We here at AEBrain have proven we know that it is better to transition dynamically than to iterate virally. A company that can scale easily will (eventually) be able to matrix defiantly. What does the standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted term "six-sigma, cross-media" really mean? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our media sourcing but our capability to engage. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. Think super-impactful, efficient, dot-com. Think transparent. Think C2B2B, holistic. Think B2B2C, strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our resource-constrained angel investors and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can cultivate faithfully will (at some point) be able to facilitate fiercely. Think ubiquitous. Think plug-and-play. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time.