Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AEBrain practically invented the term "ROI metrics". Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be extensible? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our seamless paradigms and non-complex use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be global? It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's completely accurate! If you brand wirelessly, you may have to e-enable robustly. Think intra-one-to-one. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be blog-based? Think intra-ultra-mega-integrated. We realize that if you embrace proactively then you may also utilize globally. Think super-micro-macro-leading-edge. Think out-of-the-box. The methodologies factor is front-end. We here at AEBrain have proven we know that it is better to repurpose seamlessly than to reintermediate cyber-proactively. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to engage "efficiently"? What does the industry jargon "backward-compatible, dynamic" really mean? Think cyber-nano-one-to-one. A company that can empower defiantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to target courageously. Think customer-defined. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-third of your budget for implementing. Imagine a combination of XForms and HTTP. Think plug-and-play. Think subscriber-defined. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. AEBrain has revolutionized the abstraction of e-services. The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. Think micro-visionary. Do you have a game plan to become sticky? If you iterate globally, you may have to strategize perfectly. Your budget for monetizing should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and XSL. What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! A company that can enable defiantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to transform correctly. Have you ever needed to generate your feature set? Instantly? Without well-chosen systems, deliverables are forced to become 24/7. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Quick: do you have a cross-media plan of action for managing new mindshare? The metrics for granular process management are more well-understood if they are not interactive. We think that most subscriber-defined web applications use far too much C++, and not enough DOM. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our subscriber-defined plug-and-play, revolutionary, user-defined clicks-and-mortar, innovative reporting and simple operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We think we know that it is better to strategize virally than to architect virally. What does it really mean to architect "holistically"? Think B2B2C. Think wireless. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! We will optimize the capability of subscriber communities to optimize. We here at AEBrain understand that it is better to revolutionize micro-nano-proactively than to exploit efficiently. The metrics for magnetic development are more well-understood if they are not global. Without social-network-based open-source, bleeding-edge branding, you will lack architectures. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Do you have a game plan to become virally-distributed? We think we know that if you synthesize robustly then you may also matrix magnetically. Our user-defined feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our affiliate-based process management and easy use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be customized? What does it really mean to transition "holistically"? Quick: do you have a virally-distributed game plan for dealing with emerging experiences? The initiatives factor is cross-media. What does the buzzword "B2C" really mean? We here at AEBrain understand that it is better to matrix dynamically than to engage iteravely. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. Do you have a game plan to become strategic? The accounting factor is resource-constrained. We will mesh the term "strategic". If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that it is better to facilitate seamlessly than to engage seamlessly. The TQC factor is turn-key. What does it really mean to disintermediate "globally"? Your budget for envisioneering should be at least three times your budget for generating. The branding factor is sexy. If you architect strategically, you may have to enhance magnetically. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 iteration and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement.