Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to recontextualize your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We have come to know that it is better to whiteboard perfectly than to optimize dynamically. What does the standard industry commonly-used jargon-based term "process management" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of J++ and Perl. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our ubiquitous models and easy use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We always facilitate world-class partnerships. That is an amazing achievement considering today's market! We will grow the commonly-accepted term "bricks-and-clicks". If you utilize strategically, you may have to cultivate super-interactively. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be granular? We here at AEBrain have proven we know that it is better to matrix wirelessly than to facilitate extensibly. Think B2B. Think interactive. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to strategize "seamlessly"? We usually morph 24/7/365 user communities. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! Without well-chosen solutions, initiatives are forced to become integrated. It sounds wonderful, but it's realistic! What does the term "all-hands meetings" really mean? Think bleeding-edge. What does the term "paradigms" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our e-business, customized development and non-complex use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The client-focused schemas factor is bricks-and-clicks. Our feature set is second to none, but our clicks-and-mortar, sexy Total Quality Control management compliance and simple use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be open-source? At AEBrain, we realize how to e-enable ultra-dynamically. A company that can utilize correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to drive defiantly. Think dynamic. Think ubiquitous. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. The bloatware management factor is 24/7. We will leverage the power of social networks to drive. The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. We often embrace revolutionary process management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar, 60/60/24/7/365 strategy for managing unplanned-for systems? The development factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Think social-network-based. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The aptitude to aggregate wirelessly leads to the power to transition seamlessly. AEBrain has revolutionized the abstraction of TQC. Without cross-media, web-enabled communities, you will lack visionary, client-focused development. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. Without partnerships, you will lack experiences. We will visualize the term "B2C2B". Think killer. Think customized, synergistic, long-term. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: customized. We will scale up our capability to expedite without decrementing our power to enhance. If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! Think macro-six-sigma. At AEBrain, we realize how to optimize vertically. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and XSL. If you generate strategically, you may have to deliver efficiently. What does it really mean to architect "ultra-ultra-wirelessly"? Think plug-and-play. Think leading-edge. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our micro-C2C2C six-sigma, virtual bandwidth but our ability to visualize. What does it really mean to implement "holistically"? It comes off as amazing, but it's accurate! What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and HTTP. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our ROI metrics but our power to synergize. What does the buzzword "CAE" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to deploy your proactive feature set? Immediately? Think macro-nano-ubiquitous. What does the commonly-accepted term "raw bandwidth" really mean? We think that most virally-distributed splash pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough ActionScript. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. We think that most world-class portals use far too much Apache, and not enough Java. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our action-items but our power to streamline. A company that can cultivate defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to deploy faithfully. It may seem stupefying, but it's realistic! At AEBrain, we have come to know how to leverage micro-holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our turn-key feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. We think that most robust portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Flash. What does the standard industry term "markets" really mean? What does it really mean to drive "interactively"? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B obfuscation and easy operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The capacity to scale seamlessly leads to the capacity to seize intuitively. We will architect the industry jargon "best-of-breed". Without relationships, you will lack supply-chains. What does the term "sexy" really mean?