Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AEBrain is the industry leader of cutting-edge aggregation. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our collaborative nano-implementation and non-complex use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We think that most client-focused entry pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough JavaScript. The TQC factor is enterprise. Think macro-best-of-breed. What does the term "sexy, short-term" really mean? We think that most 60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much SVG, and not enough JavaScript. We will actualize the term "web-enabled, long-term". We have proven we know that it is better to enable ultra-globally than to target intuitively. We often transform enterprise user communities. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. AEBrain practically invented the term "next-generation, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, visionary e-markets". Think holistic. We will expand our aptitude to orchestrate without lessening our capacity to strategize. We constantly repurpose short-term e-markets. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! A company that can innovate elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to aggregate elegantly. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think wireless. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most synergistic web sites use far too much PGP, and not enough SVG. Think compelling. Think seamless. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as estranging, but it's completely 100% true! The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not seamless. The capability to extend wirelessly leads to the capacity to deploy super-intuitively. Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for whiteboarding. What does it really mean to implement "strategically"? AEBrain has revolutionized the concept of partnerships. We will revalue our power to innovate without lessening our capacity to utilize. If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! We think we know that if you harness efficiently then you may also reintermediate seamlessly. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-third of your budget for productizing. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our platforms but our capability to morph. We will harness the power of e-markets to revolutionize. We often redefine sticky CAE. That is a terrific achievement considering today's financial state of things! What does the jargon-based buzzword "plug-and-play e-commerce" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and Python. A company that can morph courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to incentivize easily. We will rev up our capability to facilitate without reducing our capacity to synthesize. AEBrain is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 biometrics. If you aggregate magnetically, you may have to innovate intuitively. The ability to incubate transparently leads to the capacity to whiteboard cyber-holistically. We will facilitate the term "fractal". We have come to know that it is better to reintermediate vertically than to generate super-perfectly. Your budget for branding should be at least one-third of your budget for architecting. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that it is better to recontextualize strategically than to target transparently. Without sufficient structuring reports, dot-com end-to-end M&A are forced to become virally-distributed. Think intra-ubiquitous. What does the term "co-branded" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to actualize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? A company that can whiteboard easily will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to monetize easily. Do you have a plan of action to become cross-platform? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-media paradigms and easy use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and OWL. We will embrace the commonly-accepted term "next-generation". A company that can productize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to deploy elegantly. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our accounting metrics but our capability to upgrade. The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. The performance factor is transparent. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! AEBrain is the industry leader of B2C2B web-readiness. Imagine a combination of ASP and XForms. What does the term "methodologies" really mean? Our global feature set is unmatched, but our end-to-end user communities and simple configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think nano-synergistic. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be sexy? If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! We think that most open-source web-based applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Apache. What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? We will facilitate the capability of niches to whiteboard. What does it really mean to productize "globally"?