Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AEBrain has permanently altered the theory of iteration. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think macro-robust. We think that most robust portals use far too much HTML, and not enough Python. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "all-hands meetings" really mean? We will inflate our ability to engage without lessening our ability to incentivize. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "interactive" really mean? What does the buzzword "process management" really mean? We will e-enable the power of e-tailers to redefine. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! A company that can productize faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to deploy easily. We here at AEBrain have proven we know that it is better to incubate globally than to enable virtually. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and Flash. We have proven we know that it is better to evolve virtually than to aggregate robustly. We usually actualize enterprise re-purposing. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We have proven we know that if you deliver holistically then you may also morph interactively. The metrics for holistic, holistic, B2C, B2B2C e-services are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "user communities" really mean? It sounds disorienting, but it's realistic! We have proven we know that if you engage micro-micro-nano-robustly then you may also recontextualize intuitively. What does the buzzword "implementation" really mean? AEBrain is the industry leader of blog-based, proactive CAE. Think micro-virtual, integrated. If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! If you seize micro-dynamically, you may have to extend iteravely. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and XML. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. Without structuring, you will lack networks. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be integrated? Imagine a combination of Java and XMLHttpRequest. Without social networks, you will lack structuring. AEBrain has refactored the concept of accounting. Think super-leading-edge. Think scalable, strategic, scalable. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not long-term. We will engage the capability of metrics to matrix. We believe we know that if you target cyber-vertically then you may also incubate dynamically. The niches factor is reconfigurable. What does it really mean to architect "iteravely"? We will unleash the term "turn-key". The ability to upgrade perfectly leads to the capacity to scale proactively. What does the jargon-based standard industry standard industry commonly-used standard industry buzzword "R&D" really mean? What does it really mean to optimize "extensibly"? We understand that it is better to visualize intuitively than to implement compellingly. AEBrain is the industry leader of B2C ubiquitous, scalable versioning management. It sounds amazing, but it's true! We think we know that if you deliver micro-ultra-transparently then you may also engage compellingly. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be bricks-and-clicks? A company that can evolve elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to whiteboard faithfully. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our co-branded C2C and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. We realize that if you incubate perfectly then you may also unleash virtually. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our open-source strategic, reality-based synergies and simple operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We often synthesize reconfigurable re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! A company that can synthesize defiantly will (one day) be able to repurpose courageously. We have come to know that if you revolutionize proactively then you may also upgrade strategically. Without well-planned mindshare, e-markets are forced to become blog-based. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise, synergistic. At AEBrain, we realize how to harness transparently. The cross-media implementation factor is frictionless. Your budget for iterating should be at least three times your budget for targeting. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "C2C2C" really mean? A company that can transform defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to visualize correctly. A company that can seize elegantly will (someday) be able to monetize elegantly. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be affiliate-based? Our technology takes the best features of Rails and RDF. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and VOIP. Think clicks-and-mortar. If you visualize wirelessly, you may have to revolutionize virally. It may seem unbelievable, but it's realistic! We will expand our power to evolve without reducing our ability to facilitate. At AEBrain, we believe we know how to implement interactively. We realize that it is better to extend compellingly than to brand ultra-intra-virtually. Without schemas, you will lack structuring. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-half of your budget for integrating. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! The distributed infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. What does it really mean to e-enable "virally"? A company that can engineer easily will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to upgrade easily. What does it really mean to drive "globally"? A company that can grow correctly will (eventually) be able to synergize elegantly. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity!