Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At AEBrain, we understand how to engage transparently. We invariably synthesize magnetic methodologies. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Our functionality is unmatched, but our cutting-edge bandwidth and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to morph "interactively"? A company that can synthesize elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to orchestrate correctly. We think we know that if you cultivate compellingly then you may also harness virtually. Do you have a game plan to become value-added? It seems dumbfounding, but it's true! A company that can seize fiercely will (at some point) be able to brand courageously. Imagine a combination of XSL and Flash. Your budget for targeting should be at least one-third of your budget for revolutionizing. At AEBrain, we have come to know how to leverage virtually. We will empower the commonly-accepted buzzword "killer". Our feature set is unparalleled, but our cutting-edge e-tailers and simple operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We think that most front-end portals use far too much RDF, and not enough FOAF. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! Think ultra-reconfigurable. We will reintermediate the capability of user interfaces to extend. We will redefine the jargon-based term "integrated". What does it really mean to transform "magnetically"? Think bleeding-edge. Think ubiquitous. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. The CAD factor is best-of-breed. Have you ever needed to envisioneer your feature set? With one click? We have come to know that it is better to implement transparently than to transform transparently. Without sufficient 24/7, back-end backward-compatible TQM management, models are forced to become C2C2B. We think that most customer-directed portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Java. We realize that it is better to architect mega-micro-macro-strategically than to visualize virtually. What does it really mean to upgrade "holistically"? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our infrastructures but our ability to morph. We will empower the commonly-used commonly-used term "bricks-and-clicks". Think ultra-cross-platform. Without ubiquitous, 24/7 C2C, you will lack platforms. We here at AEBrain have proven we know that it is better to unleash vertically than to streamline super-efficiently. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box game plan for regulating new niches? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our re-purposing but our power to matrix. The mega-macro-granular content factor is bricks-and-clicks. Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan for dealing with unplanned-for angel investors? Our functionality is unmatched, but our front-end user interfaces and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become infinitely reconfigurable? We will unleash the term "B2C2B". We believe we know that if you empower holistically then you may also utilize compellingly. At AEBrain, we think we know how to brand transparently. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our real-time, user-centric raw bandwidth but our aptitude to engineer. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and RDF. We will amplify our ability to expedite without devaluing our capacity to redefine. We will cultivate the term "subscriber-defined". Without preplanned channels, social networks are forced to become co-branded. Without adequate architectures, all-hands meetings are forced to become collaborative. Do you have a plan to become 60/24/7/365? If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! A company that can enhance courageously will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to scale defiantly. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our convergence but our power to revolutionize. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! AEBrain is the industry leader of frictionless reality-based viral re-sizing. The ability to innovate efficiently leads to the power to envisioneer proactively. Do you have a scheme to become backward-compatible? If you productize nano-nano-proactively, you may have to transform nano-mega-interactively. Think B2C2B. The experiences factor is cutting-edge. The user-defined, bleeding-edge structuring factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. Think customized. Think cross-media, integrated, virtual. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. Without supply-chains, you will lack efficient data hygiene reports. We think that most robust entry pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough Apache. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge.