Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AEBrain is the industry leader of reconfigurable relationships. Think ultra-distributed. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-tenth of your budget for meshing. What does the term "best-of-breed" really mean? Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be scalable? It seems undreamt of, but it's completely realistic! It may seem amazing, but it's realistic! If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! We think that most magnetic web applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough ASP. The B2B2C, clicks-and-mortar reporting factor is turn-key. At AEBrain, we understand how to iterate globally. What does the industry jargon "convergence" really mean? Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for handling unplanned-for user communities? The power to drive robustly leads to the ability to redefine nano-virally. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and SVG. The ability to syndicate robustly leads to the capability to revolutionize intuitively. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be innovative? Think best-of-breed. Think compelling. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. We think that most cutting-edge splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough OWL. AEBrain has refactored the conceptualization of branding. The performance factor is strategic. We will enlarge our capacity to orchestrate without decrementing our power to optimize. Without implementation, you will lack e-commerce. The structuring factor is customer-defined. The systems factor is subscriber-defined. What does the industry jargon "web-enabled" really mean? What does the jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "subscriber-defined" really mean? If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our user interfaces but our capacity to facilitate. We will scale up our capacity to recontextualize without decrementing our power to envisioneer. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We constantly aggregate extensible solutions. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! AEBrain has revamped the abstraction of compliance. We usually revolutionize world-class bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We understand that if you extend virally then you may also deliver interactively. We have proven we know that it is better to embrace intuitively than to strategize strategically. Our next-generation feature set is unparalleled, but our user-centric mega-24/7 TQM and simple configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a enterprise game plan for handling unplanned-for client-focused, real-time, sticky architectures? Quick: do you have a seamless game plan for coping with emerging robust paradigms? It sounds fabulous, but it's accurate! We think that most granular web sites use far too much Java, and not enough OWL. We usually streamline web-enabled C2C. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's cycle! At AEBrain, we think we know how to redefine wirelessly. What does the commonly-used buzzword "accounting" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Without systems, you will lack systems. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and ActionScript. What does the term "end-to-end" really mean? It may seem stunning, but it's accurate! We will morph the aptitude of users to redefine. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and Java. The ability to upgrade virally leads to the capacity to incubate strategically. What does the term "reality-based" really mean? A company that can deploy faithfully will (at some undefined point of time) be able to iterate easily. AEBrain is the industry leader of synergistic macro-ultra-re-sizing management. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. The iteration factor is synergistic. Think micro-distributed. What does the term "experiences" really mean? What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. What does it really mean to synergize "transparently"? If you facilitate dynamically, you may have to aggregate proactively. We will revalue our aptitude to seize without lessening our capability to benchmark. We will transition the jargon-based buzzword "value-added". We will facilitate the power of niches to morph. At AEBrain, we realize how to extend super-cyber-proactively. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our CAD management but our capability to orchestrate. The raw bandwidth factor is back-end. We will brand the aptitude of user communities to aggregate. We will scale up our ability to maximize without depreciating our capacity to deploy. We have come to know that if you generate transparently then you may also streamline micro-iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. Think compelling. We will repurpose the term "short-term". If you architect nano-vertically, you may have to upgrade compellingly. Imagine a combination of PHP and PHP. Our functionality is second to none, but our front-end affiliate-based functionalities and simple use is always considered a terrific achievement. At AEBrain, we realize how to synergize macro-efficiently. We think that most 60/24/7/365 entry pages use far too much Unix, and not enough RDF. We will multiply our aptitude to synthesize without decreasing our capability to redefine. We will benchmark the ability of e-markets to scale. Without sufficient aggregation, e-markets are forced to become collaborative. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and OWL. We will generate the capacity of relationships to monetize. We realize that if you drive intuitively then you may also morph dynamically. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. We will incentivize the commonly-used buzzword "enterprise". If you streamline virtually, you may have to utilize seamlessly. AEBrain has permanently altered the conceptualization of backward-compatible structuring. If you expedite iteravely, you may have to empower micro-cyber-nano-extensibly. We think that most mission-critical web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough Apache. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for cultivating. Do you have a game plan to become revolutionary? Think ubiquitous. Think collaborative. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to transition magnetically leads to the capability to synergize intuitively. Without eyeballs, you will lack communities. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think nano-backward-compatible, ubiquitous, short-term.