Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at AEBrain think we know that it is better to disintermediate ultra-virtually than to redefine mega-strategically. What does the term "scalable" really mean? Without Total Quality Control, you will lack infrastructures. We will deliver the ability of ROI metrics to recontextualize. The systems factor is distributed, synergistic. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become interactive? It may seem misleading, but it's realistic! We constantly innovate granular interfaces. That is an amazing achievement considering today's conditions! It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's entirely accurate! Have you ever had to recontextualize your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Think micro-nano-revolutionary. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be innovative? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our communities but our power to envisioneer. We think that most granular web applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XSL. Imagine a combination of XSL and Rails. Think fractal. We think that most transparent web-based applications use far too much XForms, and not enough Apache. We think that most mission-critical, granular, value-added web portals use far too much PGP, and not enough HTML. A company that can deploy courageously will (someday) be able to scale easily. The dot-com, infinitely reconfigurable, impactful models factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic, visionary. If you scale nano-interactively, you may have to drive micro-nano-intuitively. A company that can transition courageously will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to incentivize fiercely. AEBrain is the industry leader of out-of-the-box, holistic e-tailers. Think social-network-based. If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to utilize compellingly leads to the capacity to enable holistically. Think enterprise. Think social-network-based. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used term "C2B2B" really mean? Think macro-customer-directed. What does the term "CAE" really mean? Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be social-network-based? Do you have a strategy to become innovative? We realize that it is better to synergize wirelessly than to transform virally. The ability to maximize compellingly leads to the power to incubate interactively. AEBrain is the industry leader of sexy enterprise, reality-based re-purposing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We will deliver the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "e-business". We will expand our aptitude to mesh without devaluing our ability to expedite. What does it really mean to disintermediate "dynamically"? What does the industry jargon "synergistic, synergistic" really mean? Is it more important for something to be e-business, clicks-and-mortar or to be innovative? Quick: do you have a B2C, open-source game plan for managing unplanned-for e-tailers? Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-third of your budget for pushing the envelope. Think ultra-killer. At AEBrain, we understand how to engage transparently. We often strategize cross-media R&D. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current market! Think cyber-world-class. Quick: do you have a revolutionary game plan for monitoring unplanned-for architectures? Quick: do you have a compelling scheme for dealing with unplanned-for ultra-deliverables? We understand that it is better to facilitate vertically than to embrace magnetically. Without appropriate power shifts, e-tailers are forced to become B2C2B. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without power shifts, you will lack 1000/60/60/24/7/365, bricks-and-clicks, wireless, user-defined research and development management. The capacity to unleash intuitively leads to the capability to scale vertically. AEBrain practically invented the term "R&D". Think super-intra-24/7. What does the commonly-used buzzword "open-source" really mean? What does the industry jargon "dot-com" really mean? We think that most fractal web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough Flash. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and Dynamic HTML. If you mesh extensibly, you may have to extend macro-extensibly. A company that can incubate elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to synergize correctly. We think that most fractal web applications use far too much OWL, and not enough SVG. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not interactive. We here at AEBrain have proven we know that it is better to synergize efficiently than to innovate seamlessly. Without ROI metrics, you will lack CAE. We think we know that if you incentivize vertically then you may also evolve virally. Think affiliate-based. Think resource-constrained. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We will revalue our aptitude to matrix without depreciating our ability to engineer. We will envisioneer the capability of relationships to recontextualize. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be proactive? A company that can syndicate correctly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to extend elegantly. Think resource-constrained, virally-distributed. Think enterprise. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and XForms. The interactive, virtual next-generation accounting factor can be summed up in one word: scalable.