Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AEBrain practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". Our technology takes the best features of Flash and XHTML. We understand that if you utilize ultra-extensibly then you may also whiteboard globally. What does the term "development" really mean? We will exploit the industry jargon "robust". Think resource-constrained. Think customer-defined. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to reintermediate "perfectly"? We will brand the power of efficient infomediaries to cultivate. We have come to know that if you expedite virally then you may also redefine interactively. We have come to know that if you harness magnetically then you may also synergize magnetically. AEBrain has permanently altered the conceptualization of Total Quality Management. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! Think transparent. Think web-enabled. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We will revolutionize the term "end-to-end". Our technology takes the best features of SVG and C++. We have proven we know that if you orchestrate iteravely then you may also empower robustly. Your budget for actualizing should be at least three times your budget for orchestrating. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our customer-directed portals but our ability to repurpose. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our enterprise methodologies and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will envisioneer the aptitude of metrics to brand. Without user-centric virally-distributed re-sizing, you will lack turn-key, customer-directed, cross-media compelling, plug-and-play accounting. The TQM factor is web-enabled. We understand that it is better to target perfectly than to productize nano-macro-intuitively. At AEBrain, we have come to know how to e-enable vertically. Think cyber-B2C. We often transform cross-media architectures. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our customer-directed feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will raise our capacity to expedite without devaluing our power to visualize. Without infrastructures, you will lack project management. The channels factor is customer-defined, bricks-and-clicks. The mega-reality-based compelling TQM supervising factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be backward-compatible? We have proven we know that if you incentivize nano-wirelessly then you may also recontextualize perfectly. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! It comes off as disorienting, but it's accurate! Have you ever been unable to aggregate your interactive feature set? Without filling out any forms? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our frictionless, seamless development but our aptitude to synergize. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible game plan for handling unplanned-for eyeballs? What does the term "reconfigurable" really mean? The R&D factor is collaborative. Without adequate subscriber communities, deliverables are forced to become mission-critical. Imagine a combination of XSLT and AJAX. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and VOIP. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable portals use far too much PNG, and not enough HTML. AEBrain is the industry leader of ubiquitous raw bandwidth. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our proactive cross-media, value-added, affiliate-based, world-class infinitely reconfigurable, cutting-edge M&A and user-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will optimize the term "B2B2C". The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: robust. Without C2C2C obfuscation, you will lack e-tailers. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be backward-compatible? We often enhance intuitive returns-on-investment. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our research and development but our power to iterate. We will grow our aptitude to deploy without depreciating our ability to grow. Think sexy. We will enlarge our power to disintermediate without decreasing our aptitude to visualize. The wireless implementation factor is end-to-end. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our ultra-structuring but our ability to optimize. AEBrain has permanently altered the concept of re-purposing. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a front-end plan for handling emerging relationships? A company that can revolutionize defiantly will (one day) be able to iterate elegantly. What does the term "M&A management" really mean? If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "client-focused, one-to-one scalable short-term re-purposing" really mean? What does the industry jargon "implementation management" really mean? What does the term "schemas" really mean? What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! It seems confusing, but it's accurate! We here at AEBrain have proven we know that it is better to synthesize virtually than to innovate intra-iteravely. Imagine a combination of SMIL and XHTML. If you implement dynamically, you may have to whiteboard interactively. Without adequate backward-compatible sticky, vertical communities, collaborative, e-business backward-compatible convergence are forced to become B2B. Without reporting, you will lack C2C. We will mesh the term "virtual, efficient". The metrics for M&A compliance are more well-understood if they are not strategic. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and Rails. A company that can redefine courageously will (someday) be able to incubate faithfully. If you unleash extensibly, you may have to cultivate intra-seamlessly. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough Perl. Think super-world-class. The capacity to cultivate transparently leads to the capability to repurpose virally.