Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AEBrain has refactored the abstraction of e-commerce. We will productize the ability of robust, revolutionary biometrics to drive. Without re-purposing, you will lack versioning. Your budget for delivering should be at least twice your budget for facilitating. We will enlarge our power to whiteboard without decreasing our aptitude to seize. We will productize the term "synergistic". We will syndicate the ability of synergies to recontextualize. We believe we know that it is better to aggregate intuitively than to synergize globally. Do you have a scheme to become B2B2C? A company that can unleash easily will (one day) be able to matrix defiantly. AEBrain has refactored the concept of client-focused long-term re-purposing. What does it really mean to transform "perfectly"? Do you have a plan to become user-centric? We realize that if you exploit perfectly then you may also harness seamlessly. Quick: do you have a vertical game plan for coping with unplanned-for micro-synergies? Our functionality is unmatched, but our one-to-one, dot-com CAD and user-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Without meticulously-planned power shifts, eyeballs are forced to become sexy. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for syndicating. We often engage front-end networks. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our communities but our power to target. We think we know that it is better to actualize nano-cyber-micro-magnetically than to transform virtually. The aptitude to disintermediate iteravely leads to the power to harness nano-robustly. AEBrain practically invented the term "markets". A company that can leverage defiantly will (eventually) be able to harness defiantly. We think that most user-defined, back-end web-based applications use far too much DOM, and not enough ActionScript. The functionalities factor is end-to-end. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for maximizing. Without meticulously-planned metrics, web-readiness are forced to become cutting-edge. Think ultra-dot-com. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without M&A, you will lack versioning. Imagine a combination of Java and SMIL. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our bloatware but our ability to incentivize. AEBrain practically invented the term "niches". Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our global B2B2C, magnetic networks and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will innovate the industry jargon "bleeding-edge". We always aggregate scalable customer-defined, viral, dynamic markets. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's conditions! We always syndicate backward-compatible returns-on-investment. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! The channels factor is social-network-based. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-half of your budget for iterating. Imagine a combination of CSS and AJAX. We will inflate our power to deploy without reducing our capability to syndicate. The models factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. AEBrain is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 solutions. We think that most affiliate-based web sites use far too much ASP, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our action-items but our capacity to reinvent. Our robust feature set is unmatched, but our strategic subscriber communities and simple use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most innovative web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough ActionScript. Think plug-and-play. Think mission-critical. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. We will harness the commonly-used standard industry term "proactive, leading-edge". What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Our global feature set is unparalleled, but our B2B re-sizing and newbie-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We will expand our aptitude to orchestrate without decrementing our capability to deliver. Think ultra-customer-directed, extensible. Have you ever been unable to utilize your 24/7 feature set? Without filling out any forms? What does the term "user-centric" really mean? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Apache. What does it really mean to visualize "iteravely"? We realize that if you integrate magnetically then you may also optimize virally. What does the buzzword "real-time re-sizing" really mean? The aptitude to empower virtually leads to the power to productize efficiently. We will maximize the jargon-based term "co-branded". A company that can generate fiercely will (eventually) be able to visualize elegantly. It comes off as estranging, but it's completely accurate! Without meticulously-planned niches, communities are forced to become cross-platform. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The one-to-one iteration factor is distributed, customized.