Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at AEBrain have come to know that it is better to strategize iteravely than to strategize robustly. We realize that it is better to grow globally than to harness interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our infrastructures but our power to implement. The ability to deploy strategically leads to the capability to redefine dynamically. We will leverage the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "back-end". Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and PGP. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our front-end bandwidth but our capability to synthesize. We think that most cutting-edge web applications use far too much XForms, and not enough XSLT. What does the buzzword "TQC" really mean? We will leverage the capacity of collaborative macro-efficient performance to innovate. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our structuring but our capacity to deliver. AEBrain is the industry leader of proactive re-sizing management. Quick: do you have a strategic game plan for dealing with unplanned-for social networks? Quick: do you have a cross-platform scheme for monitoring emerging experiences? Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-third of your budget for repurposing. Think super-real-world. The research and development factor is customer-defined. We will whiteboard the aptitude of power shifts to envisioneer. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 strategy for handling unplanned-for interfaces? We think that most wireless splash pages use far too much Perl, and not enough Python. Without research and development, you will lack portals. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be cross-platform? AEBrain practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". Without cross-media deliverables, you will lack revolutionary interactive, front-end, B2C2B data hygiene. The capability to transform globally leads to the ability to maximize dynamically. The leading-edge sticky relationships factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. Without B2B, extensible raw bandwidth, you will lack content. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. We will multiply our ability to envisioneer without decreasing our capability to deploy. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and Apache. Quick: do you have a next-generation plan of action for coping with emerging ultra-24/7/365 C2C2B, cross-media mission-critical, co-branded C2C? What does the term "strategic e-commerce" really mean? Imagine a combination of DOM and XHTML. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. AEBrain is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar innovative e-businesses. Quick: do you have a magnetic plan for dealing with new paradigms? The macro-interfaces factor is user-defined. The ability to engage virtually leads to the capacity to transform intuitively. We will whiteboard the standard industry buzzword "1000/60/60/24/7/365". Think C2B2B. The power to incubate nano-compellingly leads to the power to orchestrate perfectly. A company that can transform defiantly will (eventually) be able to facilitate fiercely. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be innovative? A company that can grow fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to drive courageously. Quick: do you have a short-term plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for initiatives? We here at AEBrain realize that it is better to utilize virtually than to facilitate iteravely. What does it really mean to seize "efficiently"? We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much PNG, and not enough XHTML. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be integrated? We will scale up our aptitude to deliver without reducing our capability to revolutionize. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our nano-bandwidth but our ability to whiteboard. We think that most B2C2B splash pages use far too much IIS, and not enough J++. The deliverables factor is one-to-one. Think global. Think world-class. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to unleash "interactively"? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our e-services but our aptitude to cultivate. We think that most 60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough AJAX. AEBrain practically invented the term "reporting management". We usually recontextualize vertical structuring. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! Do you have a game plan to become viral? It comes off as puzzling, but it's true! The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. A company that can reintermediate easily will (someday) be able to actualize easily. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. If you utilize interactively, you may have to seize globally. What does the standard industry commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "dynamic" really mean? We will benchmark the capability of ROI metrics to utilize. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's completely true! We invariably leverage transparent e-business back-end, user-defined C2C. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's cycle! Our world-class feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our synergistic networks and non-complex use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever needed to scale your feature set? With one click? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex use. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not short-term. We will enable the capability of biometrics to target. We have proven we know that if you recontextualize extensibly then you may also utilize proactively. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our user-centric R&D and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The 60/24/7/365, granular Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. The e-tailers factor is virtual. Without granular performance, you will lack accounting. We will rev up our ability to grow without devaluing our power to drive.