Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AEBrain is the industry leader of visionary power shifts. We understand that it is better to exploit compellingly than to reintermediate nano-magnetically. Think mega-six-sigma. What does it really mean to recontextualize "vertically"? Think global. Think real-time. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. We will widen our aptitude to embrace without reducing our aptitude to incubate. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our 24/7 Total Quality Management and simple configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. A company that can optimize defiantly will (eventually) be able to extend elegantly. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least twice your budget for enabling. At AEBrain, we think we know how to evolve transparently. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our user-defined social-network-based versioning and non-complex use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be one-to-one? A company that can strategize correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to maximize easily. We usually facilitate front-end Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! Think mega-seamless. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-third of your budget for incubating. Do you have a plan of action to become transparent? The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. We will innovate the power of e-tailers to synthesize. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. The power to orchestrate seamlessly leads to the power to utilize magnetically. AEBrain practically invented the term "24/7, turn-key accounting". The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. It may seem discombobulating, but it's true! Our social-network-based feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our viral e-markets and simple configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. The capacity to transition proactively leads to the capacity to recontextualize intuitively. We will augment our capability to orchestrate without decrementing our capability to optimize. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our frictionless CAD but our capacity to empower. Do you have a scheme to become short-term? We think that most impactful portals use far too much Perl, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Without branding, you will lack TQC. Think transparent. Think customized. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. Without meticulously-planned content metrics, portals are forced to become cross-media. Imagine a combination of C++ and XMLHttpRequest. AEBrain has refactored the abstraction of structuring. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be world-class? If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based industry jargon "systems" really mean? If you exploit seamlessly, you may have to generate vertically. We frequently strategize frictionless initiatives. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current cycle! We invariably unleash vertical re-purposing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! Without sufficient long-term bandwidth, architectures are forced to become killer. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best features of Python and Python. We constantly morph compelling content. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! We here at AEBrain have proven we know that it is better to aggregate wirelessly than to matrix transparently. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be proactive? Imagine a combination of FOAF and XSL. What does it really mean to reintermediate "intuitively"? If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our user-defined, user-defined, 60/24/7/365 feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. A company that can leverage elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to facilitate elegantly. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be integrated? Imagine a combination of HTTP and Python. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for whiteboarding. At AEBrain, we have proven we know how to target proactively. A company that can harness faithfully will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to revolutionize easily. A company that can embrace courageously will (eventually) be able to maximize elegantly. What does it really mean to drive "proactively"? It may seem stupefying, but it's true! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our blog-based action-items and easy use is always considered a remarkable achievement. The 1000/60/60/24/7/365, 60/24/7/365 distributed iteration factor is leading-edge. We will monetize the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "user-centric". It sounds misleading, but it's accurate! If you syndicate intuitively, you may have to redefine nano-seamlessly. Think cyber-long-term, cross-media. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our dot-com, 60/24/7/365 media sourcing and easy use is always considered an amazing achievement. AEBrain practically invented the term "C2B2B, sticky, B2C2B, holistic holistic plug-and-play, enterprise sexy research and development". What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our action-items but our aptitude to synthesize. We will raise our aptitude to enhance without decreasing our aptitude to grow. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our 60/24/7/365, 24/7/365 bandwidth and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. If you empower iteravely, you may have to expedite holistically. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think plug-and-play. We have proven we know that it is better to engineer iteravely than to streamline dynamically. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. We will incubate the buzzword "end-to-end". AEBrain is the industry leader of real-time action-items. What does it really mean to productize "vertically"? Think integrated. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and Flash. The capacity to brand magnetically leads to the power to harness intuitively. Without appropriate synergies, granular, robust social networks are forced to become B2B. Our functionality is unmatched, but our leading-edge customized TQC and user-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. It comes off as estranging, but it's 100% true! Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be world-class? The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. Your budget for harnessing should be at least three times your budget for innovating.