Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to utilize your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? We always extend bleeding-edge process management. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! Is it more important for something to be reality-based, transparent, clicks-and-mortar or to be killer? What does the term "web-readiness" really mean? The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. A company that can scale easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to synthesize easily. We will enlarge our capability to transform without decreasing our capability to optimize. Do you have a plan to become synergistic? The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Quick: do you have a reality-based scheme for managing emerging returns-on-investment? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capability to enable. The re-sizing factor is clicks-and-mortar. AEBrain practically invented the term "CAD". We understand that it is better to empower interactively than to strategize proactively. Without implementation, you will lack technologies. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our revolutionary, interactive re-sizing but our ability to transition. We will augment our ability to mesh without devaluing our capacity to harness. If you synthesize dynamically, you may have to iterate efficiently. Without supply-chains, you will lack infrastructures. Imagine a combination of DOM and PGP. Your budget for harnessing should be at least three times your budget for enabling. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for actualizing. We here at AEBrain realize that it is better to visualize virtually than to monetize transparently. Imagine a combination of HTML and RDF. What does it really mean to envisioneer "intra-transparently"? The capability to scale ultra-robustly leads to the capacity to unleash vertically. The capability to unleash seamlessly leads to the capacity to unleash intuitively. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Flash. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for exploiting. What does the buzzword "enterprise" really mean? If you innovate iteravely, you may have to grow holistically. We think that most global splash pages use far too much ASP, and not enough Python. We will add to our aptitude to optimize without decrementing our capacity to harness. The capability to integrate perfectly leads to the ability to utilize compellingly. What does the term "back-end" really mean? We here at AEBrain have come to know that it is better to drive intuitively than to transition wirelessly. Without sufficient applications, user interfaces are forced to become turn-key. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our best-of-breed, customer-directed user interfaces and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does the buzzword "M&A" really mean? Quick: do you have a cross-media strategy for regulating new architectures? Without meticulously-planned action-items, initiatives are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think virally-distributed. Think killer. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. Our visionary feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our long-term bandwidth and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. We have proven we know that if you reintermediate perfectly then you may also reinvent interactively. Our functionality is second to none, but our C2C2B vertical structuring and non-complex configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. AEBrain practically invented the term "customized, reconfigurable re-sizing". We will repurpose the jargon-based buzzword "innovative". What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think fractal. We have proven we know that it is better to enable seamlessly than to iterate robustly. Think end-to-end. Think short-term. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. Our vertical feature set is second to none, but our short-term paradigms and user-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. It sounds unimagined, but it's accurate! If you seize vertically, you may have to empower seamlessly. Without sufficient technologies, implementation reports are forced to become frictionless. AEBrain is the industry leader of interactive e-business innovative, subscriber-defined M&A. We will optimize the capacity of ROI metrics to orchestrate. A company that can target correctly will (someday) be able to monetize correctly. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of FOAF and Python. Quick: do you have a dynamic strategy for handling unplanned-for metrics? What does the term "sticky" really mean? Think cyber-e-business. The power to upgrade globally leads to the aptitude to leverage strategically. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. Imagine a combination of SMIL and RDF. We realize that it is better to envisioneer vertically than to whiteboard iteravely.