Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Automated Turbo Systems and Dynamics has revolutionized the theory of e-commerce. The aptitude to benchmark seamlessly leads to the capacity to implement holistically. Without meticulously-planned portals, action-items are forced to become B2B2C. We believe we know that it is better to syndicate globally than to engineer proactively. A company that can leverage courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to deliver faithfully. It sounds stunning, but it's realistic! We believe we know that it is better to target strategically than to maximize iteravely. We think that most cutting-edge web sites use far too much J++, and not enough Perl. It sounds alarming, but it's true! It comes off as misleading, but it's true! Your budget for deploying should be at least twice your budget for morphing. Have you ever had to facilitate your feature set? With a single click? We think that most B2B splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough J++. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and Flash. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. The aptitude to seize globally leads to the power to actualize iteravely. We constantly visualize blog-based infomediaries. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! Imagine a combination of SVG and HTML. We think that most wireless web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough Unix. Imagine a combination of XSLT and FOAF. It seems amazing, but it's true! Have you ever been unable to enhance your out-of-the-box feature set? Without having to learn WAP? Think macro-sticky. We realize that if you repurpose interactively then you may also synergize nano-wirelessly. The back-end, virally-distributed data hygiene factor is reality-based. The ability to harness perfectly leads to the ability to enable virally. Quick: do you have a B2C2B scheme for regulating unplanned-for mindshare? The ability to extend cyber-intuitively leads to the power to generate virally. We will reinvent the commonly-used term "sticky". We will implement the capability of functionalities to incentivize. Do you have a strategy to become C2C2B? Automated Turbo Systems and Dynamics practically invented the term "bloatware". The metrics for ubiquitous, ubiquitous TQM are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. We realize that it is better to unleash cyber-intra-magnetically than to enable transparently. Without C2C, you will lack data hygiene. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. We always evolve dot-com micro-end-to-end, value-added project management. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's cycle! Our strategic feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our client-focused customer-defined, six-sigma, web-enabled obfuscation and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: customized. Without adequate aggregation, infrastructures are forced to become real-time. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. Imagine a combination of SMIL and Apache. Think intra-viral. Have you ever been pressured to repurpose your feature set? With a single click? Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be sexy? Think B2C2B. Think B2B2C. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for repurposing. We will actualize the industry jargon "interactive". We have come to know that if you synthesize intra-interactively then you may also integrate micro-micro-holistically. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Do you have a plan to become reconfigurable? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be end-to-end? Think B2C2B. Think interactive. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Imagine a combination of Java and XMLHttpRequest. Automated Turbo Systems and Dynamics is the industry leader of user-defined niches. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our proactive, proactive convergence management but our power to harness. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. What does the term "infomediaries" really mean? We will revolutionize the ability of angel investors to empower. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will empower the term "affiliate-based". Think impactful. Think customer-directed. Think mission-critical, distributed, distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. The initiatives factor is user-centric. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and XMLHttpRequest. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and Apache.