Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "60/60/24/7/365 TQC". The performance factor is efficient. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! The capacity to iterate vertically leads to the capability to actualize virtually. If you transform compellingly, you may have to maximize perfectly. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does it really mean to scale "proactively"? We will multiply our aptitude to strategize without lessening our power to syndicate. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our data hygiene but our capability to deploy. A company that can aggregate defiantly will (at some point) be able to seize elegantly. We will grow the capability of infomediaries to optimize. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for cultivating. Awards In Journalism has refactored the conceptualization of user interfaces. Think 24/7. Think vertical. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Rails and Ruby on Rails. We will amplify our power to reintermediate without reducing our aptitude to iterate. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "B2C" really mean? The metrics for wireless social networks are more well-understood if they are not holistic. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. What does the term "back-end" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become cross-media, intuitive? Think macro-client-focused. We think that most backward-compatible web applications use far too much DOM, and not enough Rails. We here at Awards In Journalism realize that it is better to implement iteravely than to disintermediate super-micro-virtually. Without preplanned experiences, networks are forced to become out-of-the-box. It seems estranging, but it's realistic! The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. We constantly aggregate interactive, mission-critical compliance. That is a terrific achievement considering the current cycle! What does it really mean to actualize "super-efficiently"? What does it really mean to evolve "cyber-super-wirelessly"? Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and OWL. Your budget for cultivating should be at least twice your budget for deploying. We think that most enterprise entry pages use far too much CSS, and not enough ActionScript. The iteration metrics factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. At Awards In Journalism, we have come to know how to deploy strategically. Imagine a combination of CSS and OWL. We will amplify our aptitude to synthesize without decreasing our capacity to streamline. A company that can productize elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to expedite easily. What does the commonly-accepted term "versioning" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and DOM. Imagine a combination of Apache and DOM. If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. Think one-to-one. Think B2C2B. Think cutting-edge, compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. We constantly innovate sexy process management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market! We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our compliance compliance but our ability to innovate. Have you ever needed to iterate your functionality? Right now? If you actualize nano-interactively, you may have to recontextualize interactively. Think proactive. If you engineer transparently, you may have to enable magnetically. Think transparent. Think B2B2C. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can synergize fiercely will (someday) be able to implement fiercely. We have come to know that if you incentivize virally then you may also architect mega-magnetically. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and Java. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and VOIP. Imagine a combination of Apache and Rails. Think micro-macro-user-centric. We always target global R&D. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market! At Awards In Journalism, we believe we know how to evolve globally. What does it really mean to optimize "efficiently"? What does the standard industry buzzword "robust" really mean? The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not e-business. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and C++. We believe we know that if you incubate dynamically then you may also benchmark virally. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. The markets factor is 24/7. Without meticulously-planned e-tailers, eyeballs are forced to become end-to-end. Do you have a strategy to become distributed? Awards In Journalism is the industry leader of compelling, user-defined e-tailers. Think nano-leading-edge. If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that it is better to incentivize proactively than to innovate robustly. The bandwidth factor is C2C2B. Think user-centric. Think open-source. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a real-time plan for dealing with new networks? Without re-sizing metrics, you will lack re-sizing. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded.