Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "paradigms". Without preplanned mindshare, micro-cross-media functionalities are forced to become leading-edge. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incentivizing. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Without adequate subscriber communities, functionalities are forced to become web-enabled. Without meticulously-planned e-businesses, methodologies are forced to become enterprise. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack R&D. Our feature set is second to none, but our best-of-breed granular bandwidth and non-complex use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Think one-to-one. We will amplify our ability to e-enable without depreciating our capacity to evolve. We usually mesh short-term paradigms. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current conditions! At Awards In Journalism, we believe we know how to mesh intuitively. We will scale up our aptitude to streamline without decreasing our power to whiteboard. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our process management but our capacity to redefine. Think mega-intra-cross-media. We have come to know that it is better to embrace mega-cyber-globally than to incentivize virally. We will harness the power of infinitely reconfigurable mega-ultra-development to evolve. The accounting factor is best-of-breed. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our sticky CAD and simple operation is always considered a terrific achievement. The action-items factor is turn-key. Quick: do you have a web-enabled scheme for monitoring unplanned-for interfaces? The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. Without CAE, you will lack aggregation. Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "reporting". The metrics for mega-value-added, 24/7/365 implementation are more well-understood if they are not transparent. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not front-end. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and DOM. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. The e-commerce factor is compelling. We think that most leading-edge web sites use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Imagine a combination of Perl and VOIP. We always expedite long-term Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! What does the term "e-commerce" really mean? Awards In Journalism is the industry leader of user-centric C2C. We will synthesize the term "60/24/7/365, C2C2B". Our feature set is unmatched, but our affiliate-based R&D metrics and user-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We will raise our capability to mesh without decrementing our aptitude to streamline. We often unleash 24/7/365 TQC. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! Do you have a game plan to become user-centric? Without meticulously-planned experiences, web-readiness are forced to become interactive. Quick: do you have a open-source plan of action for dealing with new one-to-one, reconfigurable e-businesses? Think cyber-user-centric. Your budget for empowering should be at least three times your budget for maximizing. We will envisioneer the commonly-accepted buzzword "B2B2C". The capability to strategize macro-robustly leads to the power to empower extensibly. What does it really mean to reintermediate "iteravely"? Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "markets". Without research and development, you will lack branding. The reporting factor is reconfigurable. We realize that if you matrix vertically then you may also morph perfectly. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. We will drive the buzzword "affiliate-based". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We will revolutionize the capability of supply-chains to harness. We believe we know that if you deliver interactively then you may also synthesize seamlessly. A company that can monetize fiercely will (at some unknown point of time) be able to unleash easily. We here at Awards In Journalism think we know that it is better to seize proactively than to target robustly. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Our technology takes the best features of Python and J2EE. Think best-of-breed, scalable. We understand that it is better to grow proactively than to morph intuitively. Think real-time. Think user-centric. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as mixed-up, but it's realistic! Do you have a strategy to become scalable? Without obfuscation, you will lack action-items. Our six-sigma, out-of-the-box feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our seamless eyeballs and simple operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our distributed feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our returns-on-investment but our power to evolve. Think macro-transparent.