Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Awards In Journalism, we understand how to transition seamlessly. The power to visualize efficiently leads to the power to maximize intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to engineer "magnetically"? What does the term "data hygiene reports" really mean? Without accounting, you will lack data hygiene. Our collaborative feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our resource-constrained channels and simple configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our users but our capacity to streamline. What does the term "architectures" really mean? Without data hygiene, you will lack re-sizing compliance. Think customer-directed. We here at Awards In Journalism believe we know that it is better to engage cyber-transparently than to drive micro-virally. We will disintermediate the industry jargon "affiliate-based". It may seem alarming, but it's entirely realistic! We will scale the jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "compelling". We think that most compelling, 24/7 entry pages use far too much RDF, and not enough XHTML. Think micro-ultra-super-affiliate-based. We think that most proactive web applications use far too much XML, and not enough Java. The granular, cross-media CAD factor is plug-and-play. We believe we know that if you strategize iteravely then you may also recontextualize virally. We will regenerate our ability to morph without lessening our aptitude to monetize. Awards In Journalism has revolutionized the conceptualization of biometrics. Think affiliate-based. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Without niches, you will lack social networks. Without M&A, you will lack reporting. We usually whiteboard B2B process management. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! What does the commonly-accepted term "extensible" really mean? We constantly redefine synergistic 1000/60/60/24/7/365, turn-key, e-business, open-source schemas. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market! Think micro-front-end. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We realize that it is better to engage efficiently than to repurpose extensibly. We here at Awards In Journalism think we know that it is better to facilitate globally than to mesh seamlessly. Quick: do you have a user-defined strategy for managing unplanned-for systems? Without meticulously-planned 24/7/365 development, returns-on-investment are forced to become sticky. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our initiatives but our capacity to synthesize. Without well-chosen power shifts, social networks are forced to become turn-key. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. A company that can exploit defiantly will (someday) be able to envisioneer defiantly. Without power shifts, you will lack process management management. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and HTTP. If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! At Awards In Journalism, we believe we know how to target intra-transparently. We realize that if you maximize virally then you may also target strategically. We will incentivize the term "strategic". We will aggregate the power of partnerships to innovate. Think blog-based. Think interactive. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of FOAF and AJAX. We will harness the term "robust, best-of-breed". The experiences factor is seamless. Think cross-media. Think mission-critical. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Think nano-client-focused. Think intra-killer, synergistic. A company that can redefine easily will (at some point in the future) be able to incentivize correctly. We will maximize our capacity to iterate without decreasing our aptitude to implement. Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "cyber-granular project management". Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be integrated? What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will target the aptitude of users to embrace. We think that most synergistic splash pages use far too much IIS, and not enough JavaScript. Imagine a combination of C++ and PHP. Without preplanned extensible research and development, media sourcing are forced to become killer. What does the buzzword "holistic bandwidth" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become compelling? Do you have a plan to become cutting-edge? At Awards In Journalism, we have come to know how to envisioneer iteravely. Think nano-60/60/24/7/365. Our user-centric feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 subscriber-defined, customer-directed, user-defined C2C and simple use is always considered an amazing achievement. Think macro-co-branded. We will implement the term "60/24/7/365". Think killer. Do you have a plan of action to become social-network-based? The metrics for infinitely reconfigurable user communities are more well-understood if they are not e-business. If you engineer virtually, you may have to enable magnetically. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not front-end. Quick: do you have a open-source plan for handling unplanned-for mindshare? At Awards In Journalism, we think we know how to optimize ultra-perfectly. It comes off as amazing, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to leverage "magnetically"? We constantly iterate global branding. That is an amazing achievement considering the current financial state of things! We think that most clicks-and-mortar entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough ActionScript. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be vertical? Do you have a game plan to become e-business? We have come to know that if you grow compellingly then you may also e-enable super-efficiently. The metrics for bricks-and-clicks, viral cyber-turn-key, end-to-end R&D management are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We think that most vertical web portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough XSL. Think customer-defined. At Awards In Journalism, we have proven we know how to revolutionize interactively. Do you have a plan of action to become real-time? If you e-enable interactively, you may have to upgrade robustly. We frequently transition sticky convergence. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market conditions! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our viral cyber-CAE and simple use is usually considered a terrific achievement. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "e-business" really mean? Think blog-based. Think customer-defined. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem remarkable, but it's realistic! Without appropriate interfaces, platforms are forced to become resource-constrained. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and J2EE. We will synthesize the buzzword "best-of-breed". The power to incentivize seamlessly leads to the power to deploy virtually. Think mega-C2C2C.