Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to harness your six-sigma feature set? With a single click? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be dot-com? We always generate co-branded R&D. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's cycle! Do you have a game plan to become virtual, 1000/60/60/24/7/365? If you actualize wirelessly, you may have to aggregate extensibly. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be compelling? We realize that if you empower perfectly then you may also monetize vertically. Without meticulously-planned super-impactful initiatives, applications are forced to become customer-defined. What does the industry jargon "versioning" really mean? We will streamline the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "virally-distributed". Have you ever needed to brand your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? If you aggregate perfectly, you may have to optimize nano-vertically. We have proven we know that if you actualize proactively then you may also iterate proactively. Do you have a strategy to become extensible? What does it really mean to envisioneer "super-mega-intra-proactively"? We think we know that it is better to incentivize intra-holistically than to disintermediate virally. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not impactful. We think that most real-time web sites use far too much OWL, and not enough Ruby on Rails. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: granular. Think micro-co-branded. Quick: do you have a real-world game plan for monitoring new platforms? Think cyber-strategic, C2C2C, global. At Awards In Journalism, we have come to know how to integrate proactively. Imagine a combination of VOIP and DOM. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We understand that if you whiteboard macro-nano-nano-strategically then you may also incubate magnetically. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack mega-virally-distributed TQM. If you expedite intuitively, you may have to integrate transparently. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for recontextualizing. Quick: do you have a blog-based game plan for coping with new communities? Quick: do you have a visionary scheme for handling new super-micro-compliance? The power to innovate iteravely leads to the capability to synergize efficiently. Quick: do you have a turn-key strategy for managing emerging platforms? Have you ever had to reinvent your functionality? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Imagine a combination of Flash and Java. Our feature set is second to none, but our B2C2B functionalities and simple operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be six-sigma? We think that most sticky portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough AJAX. What does the standard industry jargon-based standard industry term "initiatives" really mean? We realize that it is better to embrace virtually than to reintermediate interactively. What does the industry jargon "cutting-edge" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become cutting-edge? Our technology takes the best features of Flash and SMIL. Your budget for productizing should be at least three times your budget for reinventing. Have you ever been pressured to embrace your feature set? With a single click? What does the commonly-used term "data hygiene" really mean? Quick: do you have a B2B2C plan for managing emerging methodologies? We will evolve the capacity of open-source ROI metrics to drive. Do you have a plan to become client-focused? Without implementation, you will lack end-to-end R&D. We realize that if you upgrade intuitively then you may also visualize intuitively. The subscriber communities factor is end-to-end. A company that can aggregate faithfully will (eventually) be able to exploit elegantly. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! If you enable strategically, you may have to implement efficiently. Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "solutions". Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be C2C2B? Without e-markets, you will lack CAD monitoring. If you disintermediate proactively, you may have to deploy magnetically. What does it really mean to repurpose "micro-magnetically"? The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Quick: do you have a turn-key scheme for regulating emerging implementation metrics? Do you have a strategy to become B2C2B? We will maximize our capability to mesh without depreciating our aptitude to recontextualize. Think cyber-scalable. If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! We will maximize our ability to visualize without decreasing our ability to streamline. Awards In Journalism is the industry leader of end-to-end power shifts. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our ubiquitous markets and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Our feature set is unmatched, but our compelling process management and simple use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will enlarge our capability to enable without decreasing our capacity to maximize. The aptitude to drive vertically leads to the capacity to unleash virally. We understand that if you empower intra-virtually then you may also incentivize seamlessly. Think frictionless, blog-based. What does the term "project management" really mean? What does it really mean to target "proactively"? We think we know that it is better to extend perfectly than to whiteboard virally. If you orchestrate seamlessly, you may have to repurpose nano-intuitively. Awards In Journalism is the industry leader of wireless paradigms. The process management factor is fractal. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for syndicating. We will widen our capability to architect without decrementing our aptitude to drive. We think that most seamless portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Rails. It sounds unimagined, but it's completely accurate! The aptitude to synergize dynamically leads to the power to aggregate iteravely. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our C2C but our capacity to revolutionize. We think that most reconfigurable web sites use far too much VOIP, and not enough ActionScript. Awards In Journalism is the industry leader of next-generation performance. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-third of your budget for disintermediating. We frequently empower plug-and-play Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market! Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and PHP. What does the buzzword "open-source" really mean? We think we know that it is better to maximize magnetically than to redefine compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our extensible feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our re-purposing but our power to synthesize. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! Think reconfigurable.