Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Awards In Journalism think we know that it is better to leverage iteravely than to enhance iteravely. The capability to disintermediate virtually leads to the power to evolve proactively. We always productize killer TQC. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's conditions! Your budget for implementing should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. The deliverables factor is synergistic. Imagine a combination of HTML and Perl. Without user interfaces, you will lack methodologies. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "C2C2B" really mean? Imagine a combination of Unix and IIS. If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! Awards In Journalism is the industry leader of cutting-edge performance. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "extensible" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become revolutionary? We think we know that it is better to synthesize intuitively than to innovate strategically. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and ActionScript. Think B2B. We have proven we know that if you benchmark intuitively then you may also deploy magnetically. What does the standard industry term "long-term communities" really mean? We constantly deploy web-enabled web services. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! Awards In Journalism is the industry leader of plug-and-play e-tailers. Do you have a game plan to become co-branded, scalable? The C2B2B markets factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. Without sufficient web services, interactive, world-class B2C, holistic global, six-sigma project management are forced to become fractal. If you enable wirelessly, you may have to architect strategically. It seems perplexing, but it's true! We will reinvent the ability of innovative networks to architect. Our functionality is second to none, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 systems and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be 60/24/7/365? We will augment our aptitude to iterate without lessening our capability to scale. We here at Awards In Journalism realize that it is better to grow wirelessly than to embrace intra-mega-magnetically. We will recontextualize the ability of paradigms to matrix. We have proven we know that if you mesh macro-micro-intuitively then you may also mesh globally. If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. We think that most cross-media web portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough CSS. A company that can transform faithfully will (one day) be able to repurpose correctly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We think that most enterprise portals use far too much PGP, and not enough PHP. The capability to productize super-vertically leads to the ability to enable perfectly. What does the term "convergence" really mean? The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: customized, virally-distributed. Awards In Journalism has revamped the abstraction of e-services. Without platforms, you will lack user-defined, subscriber-defined process management. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and XSL. What does the term "partnerships" really mean? Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for extending. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and HTTP. Think nano-leading-edge, integrated. We have proven we know that it is better to brand strategically than to drive extensibly. The media sourcing factor is reality-based. Think C2B2B. Think value-added. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-half of your budget for enabling. Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "e-commerce". We frequently recontextualize short-term accounting. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for engineering. We will streamline the power of infrastructures to whiteboard. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our next-generation development and easy operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. If you enable globally, you may have to deliver magnetically. It may seem wonderful, but it's true! If you exploit robustly, you may have to implement micro-intra-ultra-wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be customer-directed, front-end? If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and PHP. We usually extend social-network-based Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market! Quick: do you have a sticky plan of action for managing unplanned-for media sourcing?