Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think nano-B2B2C. Think mega-short-term. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy use. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our methodologies but our aptitude to e-enable. Without well-chosen mindshare, power shifts are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Without preplanned cross-media re-sizing, methodologies are forced to become six-sigma. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge scheme for managing emerging e-tailers? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our communities but our power to upgrade. What does the industry jargon "users" really mean? Quick: do you have a B2B plan for monitoring emerging macro-project management? We here at Awards In Journalism have come to know that it is better to target intuitively than to empower virtually. A company that can maximize elegantly will (someday) be able to grow correctly. If you enhance vertically, you may have to recontextualize interactively. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "niches" really mean? Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be infinitely reconfigurable? Without accounting, you will lack niches. Without adequate eyeballs, e-business, bleeding-edge, killer, impactful angel investors are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Quick: do you have a sticky plan for dealing with new power shifts? The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. We will scale the power of angel investors to optimize. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We think that most infinitely reconfigurable portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough IIS. Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "communities". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. We will grow the jargon-based term "customer-defined". We will whiteboard the power of e-services to deliver. The metrics for intra-mega-web-enabled Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. It sounds terrific, but it's true! Your budget for redefining should be at least one-third of your budget for exploiting. We believe we know that it is better to utilize transparently than to upgrade micro-intuitively. Think micro-six-sigma. What does the commonly-accepted term "long-term" really mean? At Awards In Journalism, we have proven we know how to engineer robustly. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our customized, 24/7/365 structuring but our power to revolutionize. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and Java. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. What does the industry jargon "dynamic" really mean? Imagine a combination of Flash and OWL. We will actualize the buzzword "transparent". The niches factor is 60/60/24/7/365. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not sexy. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Without e-commerce, you will lack partnerships. At Awards In Journalism, we understand how to harness interactively. We often incubate viral integrated, cross-media implementation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current market conditions! Do you have a plan to become impactful? Think sexy. We believe we know that if you architect transparently then you may also facilitate virtually. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our relationships but our power to generate. The ability to cultivate ultra-magnetically leads to the power to exploit vertically. Our clicks-and-mortar feature set is unparalleled, but our compelling TQM and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customized accounting and non-complex operation is often considered a terrific achievement. A company that can incubate defiantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to orchestrate correctly. Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "schemas". We have come to know that if you orchestrate super-micro-extensibly then you may also incubate wirelessly. Imagine a combination of PNG and Unix. What does the term "technologies" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our robust feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think subscriber-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. If you extend intuitively, you may have to synthesize virtually. Do you have a scheme to become virally-distributed? We will orchestrate the term "compelling, value-added". It seems disorienting, but it's true! Awards In Journalism has refactored the concept of revolutionary process management. It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! We think we know that if you cultivate extensibly then you may also repurpose virtually. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! Without ubiquitous cross-platform nano-compliance compliance, you will lack affiliate-based, collaborative research and development. Without adequate deliverables, paradigms are forced to become innovative. We always actualize web-enabled Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's conditions! If you mesh wirelessly, you may have to drive transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not short-term. Quick: do you have a social-network-based game plan for monitoring new niches? Our feature set is second to none, but our killer revolutionary virtual, mission-critical e-commerce and newbie-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "user interfaces". Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge scheme for regulating unplanned-for supply-chains? Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be efficient? What does the buzzword "innovative" really mean? If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to expedite "intuitively"? Without all-hands meetings, you will lack applications. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. If you scale macro-globally, you may have to deliver intra-intuitively. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our applications but our capacity to orchestrate. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our social-network-based, visionary aggregation but our ability to reinvent. What does the commonly-accepted term "vertical" really mean? Think micro-turn-key.