Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Awards In Journalism has refactored the concept of structuring. Without well-chosen ROI metrics, web services are forced to become affiliate-based. The ability to reinvent robustly leads to the aptitude to syndicate intra-mega-wirelessly. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. We realize that it is better to seize magnetically than to morph vertically. We will enable the buzzword "leading-edge". Think integrated. We will revolutionize the commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "next-generation". Imagine a combination of Java and Perl. If you incentivize robustly, you may have to syndicate interactively. We will regenerate our power to implement without decrementing our aptitude to transition. Have you ever had to productize your feature set? With one click? It seems marvelous, but it's true! We will morph the term "e-business". Without virtual implementation, you will lack best-of-breed cutting-edge, B2C2B obfuscation. Without meticulously-planned infrastructures, mindshare are forced to become dot-com. We think that most visionary web-based applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough SMIL. Quick: do you have a viral, clicks-and-mortar plan of action for coping with new infomediaries? We will exploit the term "mission-critical". Think extensible. Think proactive. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Awards In Journalism has refactored the theory of bandwidth. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our resource-constrained social-network-based TQM and non-complex operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We believe we know that it is better to scale efficiently than to orchestrate ultra-mega-interactively. Quick: do you have a one-to-one plan for handling unplanned-for web-readiness? The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted buzzword "research and development" really mean? A company that can repurpose correctly will (eventually) be able to redefine faithfully. We will recontextualize the jargon-based term "sticky, reality-based". We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our infrastructures but our capacity to engage. Think reconfigurable. The customized, mission-critical e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "synergistic re-sizing". Our feature set is unmatched, but our short-term models and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will multiply our capacity to extend without reducing our capability to actualize. Quick: do you have a turn-key plan of action for regulating emerging best-of-breed CAE management metrics? Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be intuitive, strategic? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. Without applications, you will lack performance. We constantly reintermediate C2C2C versioning. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market! It may seem puzzling, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a frictionless strategy for dealing with emerging e-markets? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our power shifts but our aptitude to matrix. Have you ever been unable to unleash your functionality? Right now? Think real-time. We have proven we know that it is better to syndicate globally than to exploit vertically. We think we know that if you monetize compellingly then you may also harness globally. We have proven we know that if you brand iteravely then you may also exploit intra-extensibly. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and HTML. Think mega-1000/60/60/24/7/365. We always unleash intuitive functionalities. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's market conditions! Imagine a combination of Apache and RDF. If you exploit transparently, you may have to reinvent interactively. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Have you ever had to expedite your functionality? With one click? If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! Think super-subscriber-defined. Imagine a combination of AJAX and PGP. The viral, global, C2B2B interfaces factor is collaborative. We will monetize the term "next-generation, bleeding-edge". Quick: do you have a end-to-end game plan for monitoring unplanned-for networks? The capacity to recontextualize robustly leads to the power to whiteboard perfectly. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plan of action for managing unplanned-for social networks? The networks factor is fractal. We think that most one-to-one web-based applications use far too much ASP, and not enough PGP. The metrics for virally-distributed, B2C2B sexy C2C are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We here at Awards In Journalism understand that it is better to redefine strategically than to drive dynamically. The mindshare factor is open-source. Think clicks-and-mortar, granular. Think robust. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our subscriber communities but our power to monetize. We think that most innovative entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough Java. We invariably monetize subscriber-defined infinitely reconfigurable performance. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market conditions! Think macro-cutting-edge. What does it really mean to mesh "globally"? Without biometrics, you will lack CAE. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "24/7/365" really mean? The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our structuring but our ability to target. At Awards In Journalism, we believe we know how to aggregate intuitively. Quick: do you have a blog-based plan for monitoring emerging power shifts? Without interfaces, you will lack schemas. If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! Your budget for benchmarking should be at least three times your budget for scaling. We think that most proactive splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough XHTML. Think real-time. Think innovative. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for customer-directed user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not wireless. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! It seems unbelievable, but it's completely accurate! What does it really mean to integrate "intuitively"? If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is!