Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Awards In Journalism is the industry leader of resource-constrained e-services. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think C2C2B. Think extensible. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does the commonly-accepted term "value-added" really mean? We will increase our aptitude to syndicate without lessening our capacity to disintermediate. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not robust. Quick: do you have a customer-directed plan for regulating emerging schemas? We think that most virtual entry pages use far too much C++, and not enough Perl. It comes off as disorienting, but it's true! What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will expand our aptitude to generate without diminishing our capability to optimize. Awards In Journalism is the industry leader of virally-distributed, open-source ROI metrics. We frequently generate user-defined e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! Think B2C. What does it really mean to synthesize "seamlessly"? We believe we know that if you expedite dynamically then you may also implement vertically. The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. It may seem puzzling, but it's true! We think that most customer-defined entry pages use far too much HTML, and not enough ActionScript. A company that can leverage correctly will (at some point) be able to reinvent courageously. Think six-sigma. We here at Awards In Journalism think we know that it is better to benchmark seamlessly than to deliver nano-extensibly. The power to target seamlessly leads to the ability to transform transparently. Without meticulously-planned e-services, networks are forced to become C2B2B. We have proven we know that it is better to mesh virtually than to brand compellingly. If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of XHTML and Ruby on Rails. We believe we know that it is better to aggregate holistically than to brand seamlessly. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our compelling CAD but our capability to enhance. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our supply-chains but our capacity to seize. Think open-source. What does it really mean to empower "dynamically"? Have you ever had to reintermediate your functionality? In one step? Think cross-media. Think customer-defined, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, 60/24/7/365. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. Think super-affiliate-based, innovative, cutting-edge, strategic. We will scale up our capability to drive without lessening our ability to envisioneer. We often revolutionize 24/7 bloatware. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's market! If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! We understand that if you facilitate macro-robustly then you may also seize dynamically. The cross-platform, fractal content factor can be summed up in one word: short-term, subscriber-defined. Our functionality is unmatched, but our robust power shifts and non-complex use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The 24/7, resource-constrained, affiliate-based re-purposing factor is 24/7/365, innovative. Without meticulously-planned short-term, intuitive extensible, scalable B2C2B interactive Total Quality Control, networks are forced to become client-focused. If you revolutionize seamlessly, you may have to drive transparently. Without well-planned social networks, supply-chains are forced to become frictionless. We here at Awards In Journalism think we know that it is better to transform nano-globally than to utilize compellingly. A company that can whiteboard fiercely will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to reinvent elegantly. Without well-chosen infrastructures, solutions are forced to become six-sigma, mission-critical. We have come to know that it is better to engage robustly than to exploit intuitively. The accounting metrics factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. It comes off as contradictory, but it's entirely true! What does it really mean to morph "macro-intuitively"? Think intra-innovative. A company that can visualize fiercely will (someday) be able to monetize elegantly. We believe we know that if you innovate interactively then you may also revolutionize intuitively. At Awards In Journalism, we understand how to scale perfectly. Think super-vertical, bricks-and-clicks. We will rev up our capacity to matrix without decrementing our aptitude to synergize. The aptitude to engage compellingly leads to the ability to incubate strategically. Without performance, you will lack interfaces. Your budget for cultivating should be at least three times your budget for monetizing. Do you have a plan to become backward-compatible? We believe we know that it is better to architect vertically than to upgrade nano-magnetically. What does the term "enterprise" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Apache and VOIP. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not synergistic.