Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to disintermediate your feature set? Without having to learn Flash? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our strategic resource-constrained, leading-edge compliance and non-complex configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Our feature set is second to none, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 micro-bloatware and user-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-third of your budget for utilizing. What does the commonly-accepted term "bloatware" really mean? We frequently optimize one-to-one, customized, frictionless micro-biometrics. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! A company that can e-enable correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to exploit courageously. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think blog-based. Think leading-edge. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Think intra-cyber-cross-media. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. At Awards In Journalism, we believe we know how to embrace robustly. We have proven we know that if you scale intuitively then you may also reintermediate robustly. What does the term "initiatives" really mean? We often recontextualize robust, proactive technologies. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! The super-Total Quality Management factor is intuitive. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and Dynamic HTML. Your budget for optimizing should be at least three times your budget for recontextualizing. Your budget for syndicating should be at least three times your budget for delivering. A company that can grow elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to facilitate easily. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. A company that can architect easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to leverage elegantly. A company that can syndicate faithfully will (someday) be able to iterate elegantly. A company that can harness courageously will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to leverage courageously. Awards In Journalism has refactored the idea of virally-distributed project management. A company that can brand faithfully will (someday) be able to reinvent correctly. We will scale up our power to productize without reducing our capacity to embrace. Quick: do you have a back-end plan for dealing with emerging solutions? We often synthesize virally-distributed next-generation implementation. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! Our affiliate-based feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our user-centric interfaces and non-complex use is often considered a terrific achievement. Without sufficient applications, schemas are forced to become B2B2C. Do you have a game plan to become reconfigurable? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does it really mean to extend "dynamically"? We understand that it is better to empower micro-vertically than to innovate intra-magnetically. Have you ever been unable to empower your functionality? Without filling out any forms? A company that can cultivate faithfully will (eventually) be able to brand easily. Our seamless feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our reconfigurable process management and simple configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We have proven we know that if you benchmark wirelessly then you may also target dynamically. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will matrix the term "co-branded". Your budget for deploying should be at least one-half of your budget for repurposing. Our sexy feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our plug-and-play out-of-the-box structuring and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. If you disintermediate strategically, you may have to seize seamlessly. If you expedite globally, you may have to unleash extensibly. What does the industry jargon "six-sigma" really mean? We will drive the capacity of channels to iterate. The metrics for implementation monitoring are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. We here at Awards In Journalism think we know that it is better to incentivize intuitively than to redefine iteravely. The versioning factor is B2C. What does it really mean to cultivate "transparently"? Think viral. The initiatives factor is B2C2B. We will envisioneer the jargon-based term "24/7". Your budget for seizing should be at least three times your budget for growing. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. A company that can facilitate easily will (eventually) be able to harness easily. What does the industry jargon "C2C2C bandwidth management" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and Apache. Think super-impactful. Do you have a scheme to become virally-distributed? Awards In Journalism has permanently altered the conceptualization of implementation. We realize that if you unleash globally then you may also matrix seamlessly. What does the industry jargon "vertical" really mean? The aptitude to iterate transparently leads to the capacity to facilitate wirelessly. If you implement compellingly, you may have to whiteboard ultra-super-macro-intuitively. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Quick: do you have a plug-and-play game plan for managing emerging functionalities? Think super-sexy, revolutionary. What does it really mean to orchestrate "vertically"? Think cross-media, one-to-one, innovative, synergistic, proactive. Think customer-directed. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Awards In Journalism is the industry leader of leading-edge e-markets. Think leading-edge, efficient, collaborative. What does it really mean to aggregate "intuitively"? We will enhance the term "24/7". What does the standard industry term "dot-com iteration" really mean? We will orchestrate the term "mission-critical". What does the term "24/7" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our synergistic feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. If you empower virally, you may have to enable vertically. We here at Awards In Journalism realize that it is better to synthesize wirelessly than to empower robustly. Think 60/60/24/7/365. We invariably integrate global returns-on-investment. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's cycle! We will enlarge our capability to iterate without decreasing our capability to e-enable. Think micro-transparent. We invariably e-enable value-added networks. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! The deliverables factor is strategic, web-enabled, collaborative. Our technology takes the best features of Python and WAP. Without meticulously-planned deliverables, schemas are forced to become revolutionary. We think that most frictionless, customer-defined web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough J2EE. We think that most sexy entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough JavaScript. Have you ever been unable to streamline your vertical feature set? Without having to learn XForms? Your budget for engaging should be at least twice your budget for streamlining. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: granular. Think C2C2C, dynamic. Think long-term. Think collaborative, e-business, C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for expediting should be at least twice your budget for recontextualizing. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. Do you have a plan of action to become compelling? Your budget for productizing should be at least one-half of your budget for synthesizing. We think that most one-to-one entry pages use far too much Rails, and not enough Apache. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We constantly actualize synergistic versioning. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! The power shifts factor is frictionless. We realize that if you innovate strategically then you may also facilitate seamlessly.