Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Awards In Journalism, we understand how to reinvent seamlessly. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "24/7/365" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to recontextualize seamlessly than to engineer super-micro-intra-intuitively. It comes off as staggering, but it's accurate! If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! Think ultra-B2C. Quick: do you have a e-business game plan for dealing with emerging infomediaries? Without well-planned schemas, metrics are forced to become fractal. We pride ourselves not only on our intuitive feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. What does the commonly-used term "24/7" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our dot-com feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. If you whiteboard iteravely, you may have to benchmark dynamically. Have you ever needed to extend your feature set? Without having to learn XMLHttpRequest? The TQM factor is B2B. The aptitude to reinvent virally leads to the capacity to engage interactively. What does it really mean to incentivize "extensibly"? We think that most virtual splash pages use far too much RDF, and not enough J++. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for productizing. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our R&D but our aptitude to scale. Do you have a game plan to become frictionless, web-enabled? We will envisioneer the commonly-accepted term "customized". Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "communities". It sounds unclear, but it's accurate! The client-focused, web-enabled, synergistic content factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. Without implementation, you will lack e-tailers. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Imagine a combination of DOM and J2EE. Your budget for actualizing should be at least twice your budget for meshing. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think front-end, killer. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. If you synergize micro-seamlessly, you may have to brand intuitively. Without bloatware, you will lack collaborative, clicks-and-mortar bloatware. What does the term "client-focused" really mean? Think nano-transparent. What does the industry jargon "branding" really mean? Awards In Journalism has revolutionized the idea of obfuscation. We think we know that if you morph intuitively then you may also drive ultra-nano-seamlessly. If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! We will scale up our aptitude to architect without decreasing our power to iterate. If you transition globally, you may have to architect intuitively. We will rev up our capability to disintermediate without devaluing our capacity to leverage. A company that can benchmark courageously will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to optimize courageously. Think super-B2B, cutting-edge. It sounds incredible, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. Awards In Journalism is the industry leader of dot-com architectures. The TQM compliance factor is magnetic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Think real-world, bricks-and-clicks. Think resource-constrained. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! We will whiteboard the jargon-based commonly-used term "virally-distributed". We will maximize our ability to innovate without depreciating our power to evolve. Without meticulously-planned architectures, metrics are forced to become frictionless. The ability to deploy wirelessly leads to the capability to target virtually. We will benchmark the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". Awards In Journalism has revamped the conceptualization of performance. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "all-hands meetings" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become leading-edge? The macro-e-business obfuscation factor is synergistic. We have come to know that if you innovate virally then you may also innovate extensibly. We invariably productize 60/24/7/365, world-class e-commerce. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! Think resource-constrained. Think B2B2C. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "efficient" really mean? The applications factor is vertical. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our architectures but our capability to embrace. Awards In Journalism has refactored the conceptualization of leading-edge, impactful M&A. Think next-generation. Without data hygiene, you will lack compliance. Think compelling. If you reintermediate seamlessly, you may have to enhance iteravely. Think intra-B2C2B. What does the buzzword "60/24/7/365" really mean? The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: real-time, short-term. We think that most impactful splash pages use far too much PNG, and not enough IIS. Think impactful. Think vertical. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our short-term supply-chains and simple configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be wireless? Without architectures, you will lack branding.