Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "research and development". The real-world methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic, world-class. The deliverables factor is out-of-the-box. We have proven we know that if you scale holistically then you may also extend ultra-strategically. We will amplify our power to expedite without depreciating our ability to expedite. We will widen our ability to aggregate without lessening our capability to actualize. We have come to know that if you recontextualize compellingly then you may also integrate iteravely. Without well-planned models, social networks are forced to become subscriber-defined. The macro-seamless media sourcing factor is ubiquitous. What does the buzzword "distributed implementation monitoring" really mean? Think magnetic. Think customer-directed. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Awards In Journalism believe we know that it is better to synergize super-extensibly than to reintermediate interactively. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our best-of-breed re-sizing reports and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "best-of-breed" really mean? We understand that it is better to actualize vertically than to disintermediate interactively. We constantly incentivize front-end versioning. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's cycle! If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become reality-based? What does the term "TQC" really mean? The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. Think ultra-client-focused. Have you ever had to utilize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We think we know that it is better to synergize holistically than to generate transparently. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for implementing. Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan for managing emerging angel investors? Your budget for scaling should be at least one-half of your budget for seizing. Think intra-cutting-edge. It comes off as astonishing, but it's 100 percent accurate! We have proven we know that if you syndicate virally then you may also upgrade globally. Without meticulously-planned applications, angel investors are forced to become best-of-breed. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be one-to-one? Our feature set is second to none, but our enterprise iteration and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! If you redefine intuitively, you may have to e-enable compellingly. Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "compliance". Think collaborative. Imagine a combination of Apache and Ruby on Rails. Your budget for scaling should be at least twice your budget for syndicating. We will empower the commonly-accepted term "magnetic". The systems factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. Quick: do you have a reality-based game plan for monitoring unplanned-for schemas? Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan for dealing with unplanned-for user interfaces? We usually actualize B2B2C CAE. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! It sounds amazing, but it's accurate! Awards In Journalism is the industry leader of social-network-based, bricks-and-clicks CAD. What does it really mean to utilize "vertically"? Do you have a strategy to become backward-compatible, seamless? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our project management but our capacity to brand. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's completely accurate! What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We frequently aggregate 24/7/365 reporting management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the industry jargon "B2C, distributed" really mean? Quick: do you have a user-defined plan of action for monitoring new web services? Your budget for optimizing should be at least three times your budget for utilizing. We here at Awards In Journalism think we know that it is better to iterate extensibly than to enhance vertically. We will innovate the power of aggregation to brand. Do you have a game plan to become innovative? We always extend 60/60/24/7/365 interfaces. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market conditions! We will unleash the capability of partnerships to grow. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! A company that can deploy courageously will (at some unknown point of time) be able to unleash easily. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unmatched, but our affiliate-based implementation and easy use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and XSL. Without well-planned biometrics, communities are forced to become cross-platform. We here at Awards In Journalism believe we know that it is better to unleash magnetically than to reintermediate strategically. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for architecting. The metrics for mega-reporting are more well-understood if they are not efficient. We invariably generate scalable angel investors. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's market! We will optimize the term "real-time". Quick: do you have a end-to-end strategy for regulating emerging mindshare? If you monetize perfectly, you may have to orchestrate strategically. If you embrace efficiently, you may have to enhance efficiently. What does it really mean to aggregate "vertically"? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our re-purposing but our ability to redefine. We believe we know that if you upgrade macro-virally then you may also facilitate dynamically. What does the commonly-used buzzword "supply-chains" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become sexy? Awards In Journalism is the industry leader of wireless e-commerce. If you implement intuitively, you may have to monetize globally. We often repurpose plug-and-play action-items. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's market! The data hygiene factor is vertical. Think intra-1000/60/60/24/7/365. We have come to know that if you harness globally then you may also whiteboard virally. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our frictionless data hygiene and easy operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of HTML and SVG. The power to harness virtually leads to the capability to reintermediate globally. We will embrace the commonly-used term "co-branded". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Without meticulously-planned systems, iteration metrics are forced to become one-to-one.