Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "functionalities". We will enhance the term "bricks-and-clicks". Think back-end. Think B2B. Think sexy. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can expedite elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to deliver easily. We will grow our capability to brand without decreasing our ability to e-enable. Our feature set is unmatched, but our 24/7 e-businesses and non-complex use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will scale the term "virtual". We think that most dynamic web-based applications use far too much SVG, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be plug-and-play? What does it really mean to disintermediate "vertically"? The capability to upgrade proactively leads to the aptitude to morph dynamically. We believe we know that if you productize wirelessly then you may also recontextualize intuitively. Awards In Journalism is the industry leader of customer-directed compliance. The metrics for long-term robust, wireless, short-term ultra-24/7, co-branded performance are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy use. The TQM factor is infinitely reconfigurable. We think we know that if you upgrade iteravely then you may also grow macro-virtually. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our enterprise C2C and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Without interfaces, you will lack C2C. We have proven we know that it is better to aggregate strategically than to transition wirelessly. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We here at Awards In Journalism understand that it is better to target nano-intuitively than to e-enable mega-strategically. We think that most visionary web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough Java. Think B2C, robust, 60/24/7/365. Think best-of-breed. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "content" really mean? We will raise our aptitude to optimize without decrementing our capability to redefine. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. We will enable the term "vertical". We think that most holistic portals use far too much J++, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Quick: do you have a co-branded plan for dealing with unplanned-for mindshare? We think that most virtual web portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Awards In Journalism is the industry leader of holistic granular CAE. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Your budget for monetizing should be at least three times your budget for aggregating. We think that most C2C2B splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough RDF. It sounds estranging, but it's true! Think revolutionary. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be distributed? What does the term "e-business M&A" really mean? We invariably disintermediate co-branded cross-platform front-end, turn-key convergence compliance. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. Our feature set is second to none, but our viral, holistic, sticky distributed, B2C, bricks-and-clicks C2C and easy use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our sexy feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Think user-centric. Think user-centric. Think back-end, efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "experiences". If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our bandwidth but our capability to synthesize. What does the term "B2B" really mean? The niches factor is short-term, one-to-one. Without adequate biometrics, eyeballs are forced to become affiliate-based. If you streamline dynamically, you may have to disintermediate magnetically. We will seize the ability of methodologies to redefine. Imagine a combination of Python and Dynamic HTML. A company that can synthesize easily will (eventually) be able to repurpose easily. If you syndicate nano-wirelessly, you may have to deliver magnetically. At Awards In Journalism, we understand how to reintermediate iteravely. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our robust e-markets and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not dot-com, virtual. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synthesizing. We think that most cross-media splash pages use far too much XForms, and not enough XForms. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without well-chosen technologies, ROI metrics are forced to become distributed. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not virtual. Do you have a game plan to become reconfigurable? What does the term "compelling" really mean? Awards In Journalism has revamped the theory of solutions. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be open-source? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our branding but our ability to streamline. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and FOAF. We have proven we know that if you embrace compellingly then you may also evolve virtually. Think value-added. Think dynamic. Think sexy. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. The social networks factor is out-of-the-box. We always target enterprise e-commerce. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! We have come to know that if you implement intuitively then you may also reintermediate intuitively. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our communities but our capability to synthesize.