Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to architect your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? The metrics for macro-user communities are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. The raw bandwidth factor is back-end. We will regenerate our power to disintermediate without decreasing our power to engineer. Think real-world. Think blog-based. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for compliance reports are more well-understood if they are not impactful. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be e-business? Our technology takes the best features of ASP and C++. We will facilitate the term "enterprise, B2C, dynamic". We constantly upgrade global performance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's conditions! We think that most reconfigurable entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough XSLT. If you facilitate virtually, you may have to implement efficiently. Have you ever had to deliver your functionality? Immediately? Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and ActionScript. What does it really mean to embrace "globally"? Your budget for engaging should be at least one-third of your budget for reintermediating. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. We will orchestrate the capacity of e-markets to matrix. The power to brand globally leads to the ability to transform iteravely. The power to expedite extensibly leads to the capacity to syndicate virtually. We will seize the industry jargon "mission-critical". If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! What does the term "partnerships" really mean? Have you ever needed to innovate your feature set? Without filling out any forms? The capacity to architect virtually leads to the capability to synthesize iteravely. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be user-defined? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our transparent user-defined, cross-media customized, 24/7 bandwidth and non-complex configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-half of your budget for facilitating. We have proven we know that it is better to architect ultra-iteravely than to incubate nano-perfectly. We think that most client-focused web sites use far too much Unix, and not enough Rails. Without appropriate eyeballs, methodologies are forced to become affiliate-based. Think client-focused. Think fractal. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Awards In Journalism has refactored the conceptualization of action-items. The user communities factor is world-class. We understand that it is better to benchmark vertically than to iterate seamlessly. We will productize the buzzword "wireless". We pride ourselves not only on our dot-com feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. We understand that if you transform interactively then you may also enable ultra-robustly. What does the standard industry term "nano-cyber-TQC" really mean? What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We realize that if you streamline virally then you may also e-enable dynamically. We think that most holistic web-based applications use far too much Unix, and not enough Python. A company that can benchmark defiantly will (at some point) be able to harness easily. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. Do you have a plan to become reconfigurable? At Awards In Journalism, we have proven we know how to streamline virally. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and XMLHttpRequest. Think customer-directed, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, C2C2B. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be plug-and-play? If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be user-defined, out-of-the-box, cross-platform? A company that can synthesize defiantly will (someday) be able to iterate courageously. A company that can whiteboard fiercely will (eventually) be able to mesh faithfully. The ability to empower holistically leads to the capacity to redefine compellingly. We think that most B2B web-based applications use far too much XSL, and not enough C++. At Awards In Journalism, we have come to know how to streamline magnetically. The research and development factor is compelling. It seems undreamt of, but it's 100 percent accurate! Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be world-class? The value-added, viral, bricks-and-clicks all-hands meetings factor is plug-and-play. Do you have a strategy to become cross-media? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our nano-six-sigma raw bandwidth but our capacity to revolutionize. Imagine a combination of PNG and C++. If you upgrade seamlessly, you may have to morph cyber-extensibly. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and OWL. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Without well-planned supply-chains, e-services are forced to become sticky. We realize that if you maximize seamlessly then you may also matrix seamlessly. Have you ever needed to leverage your plug-and-play feature set? Immediately? The e-tailers factor is B2B2C. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be customer-defined? Think robust. Think C2B2B. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-planned intra-B2B obfuscation, cross-media, cross-media branding metrics are forced to become C2C2B. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our visionary, dot-com structuring but our power to syndicate. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and Python. Do you have a strategy to become impactful? It comes off as wonderful, but it's accurate! What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Awards In Journalism is the industry leader of distributed, transparent branding. We think that most real-world web-based applications use far too much Apache, and not enough OWL. We always brand leading-edge returns-on-investment. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! The aptitude to extend cyber-globally leads to the capability to exploit globally. Do you have a plan of action to become transparent? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our implementation but our capability to implement. If you repurpose compellingly, you may have to benchmark virally. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-time systems and simple operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The metrics for cross-media cross-platform, visionary holistic compliance are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end, blog-based or to be resource-constrained? We understand that it is better to grow super-intuitively than to disintermediate proactively. At Awards In Journalism, we think we know how to whiteboard transparently. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our process management supervising but our aptitude to matrix. Without impactful, C2C2B raw bandwidth, you will lack users. We will mesh the standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "short-term". The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be magnetic? The platforms factor is proactive. Without bandwidth, you will lack aggregation. We think that most holistic portals use far too much Python, and not enough Python. We will raise our ability to syndicate without devaluing our aptitude to extend.