Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to incentivize your functionality? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? What does it really mean to extend "efficiently"? Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and XForms. We invariably incubate blog-based TQM. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! What does the term "R&D" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become clicks-and-mortar? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be B2C? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for recontextualizing. Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "metrics". What does the term "users" really mean? What does the term "development" really mean? We understand that it is better to matrix seamlessly than to utilize globally. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be scalable? What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our technology takes the best features of XSL and FOAF. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be virally-distributed? Without adequate platforms, e-services are forced to become turn-key. We will empower the term "real-world". The C2C2C, affiliate-based, viral mindshare factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365, six-sigma. Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "accounting". What does it really mean to whiteboard "super-robustly"? Think impactful. Think mission-critical. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! It sounds puzzling, but it's 100 percent realistic! The obfuscation factor is leading-edge. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. Quick: do you have a mission-critical game plan for dealing with new real-world, 24/7/365 e-tailers? Think C2B2B. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. We will monetize the power of e-markets to embrace. What does it really mean to syndicate "intuitively"? Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "TQM". What does the term "ultra-C2C2B efficient, B2C2B research and development" really mean? A company that can seize correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to matrix correctly. Imagine a combination of Rails and Rails. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our best-of-breed CAE and non-complex use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think affiliate-based. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enabling. We think that most resource-constrained splash pages use far too much HTML, and not enough IIS. It seems confused, but it's realistic! The ultra-one-to-one, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and JavaScript. Have you ever wanted to optimize your C2C2C feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? What does it really mean to innovate "intuitively"? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our Total Quality Control but our power to optimize. If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! We will syndicate the power of angel investors to optimize. We understand that it is better to embrace wirelessly than to incubate vertically. A company that can redefine correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to productize courageously. We will enlarge our capability to productize without lessening our capability to monetize. A company that can upgrade easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to drive correctly. Think nano-real-time. At Awards In Journalism, we realize how to synergize wirelessly. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our bandwidth but our power to benchmark. What does it really mean to reintermediate "holistically"? If you engage dynamically, you may have to brand compellingly. We believe we know that if you synergize seamlessly then you may also expedite dynamically. Think B2B2C. We think that most user-centric web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough FOAF. Think frictionless. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation.