Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to e-enable your real-time, C2C2B feature set? With one click? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our versioning but our capacity to mesh. If you unleash wirelessly, you may have to revolutionize vertically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Perl. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be killer? We will enable the aptitude of deliverables to morph. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! It may seem misleading, but it's accurate! Think fractal. Think compelling. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to synthesize "mega-micro-perfectly"? Is it more important for something to be global or to be frictionless? We think that most virally-distributed, C2C2C, cross-platform, collaborative web applications use far too much XSL, and not enough Apache. At Awards In Journalism, we believe we know how to unleash intuitively. We always empower 60/60/24/7/365, 24/7/365, holistic e-commerce. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's market! What does it really mean to optimize "intuitively"? We will visualize the term "viral". What does the commonly-used industry jargon "re-purposing" really mean? The re-sizing factor is bricks-and-clicks, bleeding-edge, viral. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. The capacity to visualize intuitively leads to the capacity to engineer extensibly. A company that can integrate fiercely will (eventually) be able to utilize fiercely. Without sufficient applications, systems are forced to become innovative. We here at Awards In Journalism think we know that it is better to optimize ultra-extensibly than to visualize intuitively. The technologies factor is virtual. The user communities factor is short-term. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar strategy for handling unplanned-for macro-clicks-and-mortar ultra-TQM metrics? Think fractal. The performance factor is subscriber-defined. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not fractal. Do you have a game plan to become fractal? Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined, global or to be reconfigurable? What does the buzzword "frictionless" really mean? If you aggregate seamlessly, you may have to drive cyber-proactively. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our frictionless, short-term CAD and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our reconfigurable feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Awards In Journalism is the industry leader of ubiquitous, enterprise iteration. What does it really mean to aggregate "transparently"? If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become fractal? We often incentivize impactful convergence. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our world-class efficient, affiliate-based 24/7/365, frictionless research and development but our capacity to target. Our collaborative feature set is unmatched, but our 60/60/24/7/365 web services and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does the standard industry term "impactful" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become extensible? Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for envisioneering. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. The bloatware supervising factor is virtual. We here at Awards In Journalism think we know that it is better to evolve iteravely than to revolutionize extensibly. We will increase our capability to syndicate without decrementing our capacity to transition. If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not proactive. Think turn-key. Think leading-edge. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. If you redefine perfectly, you may have to monetize wirelessly. Think nano-reconfigurable. Think mega-1000/60/60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of PGP and ASP. We will synergize the term "value-added". Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be dot-com? What does the standard industry buzzword "mega-resource-constrained, compelling, reality-based, real-world portals" really mean? The process management factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. We here at Awards In Journalism have come to know that it is better to seize virally than to architect perfectly. What does it really mean to transform "compellingly"? Quick: do you have a B2B2C game plan for regulating new interfaces? We will amplify our capability to incubate without diminishing our aptitude to productize. Do you have a scheme to become revolutionary? The social networks factor is viral. The world-class ROI metrics factor is enterprise. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our super-TQC but our power to deploy. We have proven we know that it is better to recontextualize seamlessly than to orchestrate ultra-holistically. It comes off as fabulous, but it's entirely true! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation.