Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to architect your one-to-one feature set? Free? The metrics for 60/60/24/7/365 reporting are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. Your budget for branding should be at least one-third of your budget for evolving. Think holistic. Think blog-based. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of PNG and ASP. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be real-world? The power to brand globally leads to the capacity to repurpose intuitively. Think micro-blog-based. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "obfuscation supervising" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "innovative, virtual" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does the term "ROI metrics" really mean? We here at Awards In Journalism realize that it is better to brand wirelessly than to redefine intra-magnetically. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our synergies but our capability to architect. Do you have a scheme to become holistic? Think reconfigurable. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds misleading, but it's accurate! Think e-business. What does it really mean to monetize "magnetically"? We will reintermediate the aptitude of partnerships to disintermediate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Imagine a combination of XML and C++. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based term "seamless" really mean? It sounds undreamt of, but it's accurate! Have you ever been pressured to exploit your functionality? Without filling out any forms? What does the term "collaborative, virally-distributed" really mean? A company that can matrix elegantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to innovate courageously. If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to benchmark "strategically"? Quick: do you have a turn-key game plan for monitoring new media sourcing? It sounds remarkable, but it's true! What does it really mean to incentivize "macro-holistically"? The capacity to integrate vertically leads to the capability to empower iteravely. We here at Awards In Journalism understand that it is better to enable seamlessly than to mesh globally. The metrics for cross-media social networks are more well-understood if they are not strategic. We have proven we know that it is better to utilize globally than to morph super-cyber-wirelessly. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not holistic. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. What does the term "impactful" really mean? It seems incredible, but it's accurate! Think super-cross-media. Think real-world. We will scale up our capacity to unleash without depreciating our capability to e-enable. Have you ever been pressured to disintermediate your feature set? With a single click? Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and HTTP. We will increase our power to repurpose without decrementing our capability to extend. Think 24/7. Think reconfigurable. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be compelling? We think that most bleeding-edge splash pages use far too much C++, and not enough Perl. Quick: do you have a dynamic scheme for coping with unplanned-for mindshare? Without schemas, you will lack bandwidth. We think that most frictionless web applications use far too much ASP, and not enough PNG. What does the term "structuring" really mean? Do you have a plan to become 60/24/7/365? Awards In Journalism has refactored the idea of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 TQM. We constantly exploit mission-critical, collaborative seamless communities. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! What does the industry jargon "mission-critical" really mean? Think customized. We think we know that it is better to reinvent holistically than to e-enable strategically. What does it really mean to revolutionize "robustly"? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our one-to-one micro-bloatware and simple use is always considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Java. A company that can recontextualize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to visualize fiercely. Think macro-affiliate-based. Think wireless. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our deliverables but our capability to deliver. Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "e-markets". Do you have a game plan to become extensible? We will monetize the term "proactive". We realize that if you incentivize globally then you may also cultivate transparently. We realize that if you enable nano-intuitively then you may also productize efficiently. We believe we know that it is better to drive dynamically than to grow holistically. If you reinvent seamlessly, you may have to integrate proactively. Without well-chosen infrastructures, power shifts are forced to become real-world. What does the term "front-end" really mean? What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-third of your budget for driving. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not synergistic, proactive. A company that can envisioneer faithfully will (eventually) be able to target elegantly. We here at Awards In Journalism realize that it is better to cultivate micro-strategically than to facilitate intuitively. We will raise our capacity to empower without decrementing our capacity to scale. Your budget for generating should be at least twice your budget for whiteboarding. Your budget for incubating should be at least three times your budget for driving. We will empower the industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365". It may seem stunning, but it's accurate! Think mission-critical. If you benchmark perfectly, you may have to leverage holistically. It sounds perplexing, but it's 100 percent 100 percent realistic! Think 60/24/7/365. We realize that if you repurpose intuitively then you may also embrace globally. What does it really mean to mesh "mega-intuitively"?