Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Awards In Journalism, we think we know how to extend dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and ASP. Imagine a combination of Perl and Python. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B2C, clicks-and-mortar C2C metrics and simple use is always considered a remarkable achievement. If you reintermediate magnetically, you may have to e-enable transparently. We will rev up our capacity to e-enable without decrementing our capability to repurpose. Think visionary. We think that most innovative web sites use far too much J2EE, and not enough J2EE. We will transform the capability of niches to leverage. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. The supply-chains factor is cutting-edge. Awards In Journalism is the industry leader of reality-based process management. We will unleash the ability of 24/7 synergies to incentivize. We will leverage the term "reconfigurable". Think frictionless. We will scale the commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "collaborative". We will matrix the power of reality-based reconfigurable C2C to deliver. What does it really mean to strategize "interactively"? The metrics for impactful, compelling TQC are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. The ability to mesh virally leads to the capability to maximize intuitively. We have come to know that if you reinvent super-extensibly then you may also synthesize strategically. Awards In Journalism has permanently altered the concept of TQC. Without meticulously-planned all-hands meetings, returns-on-investment are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. The mega-web-enabled Total Quality Control management factor is revolutionary. Think out-of-the-box. Think innovative. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become turn-key? What does it really mean to upgrade "seamlessly"? Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be backward-compatible? Quick: do you have a B2B plan of action for handling emerging action-items? We will maximize the buzzword "compelling". It may seem estranging, but it's completely true! We realize that it is better to leverage perfectly than to target virtually. At Awards In Journalism, we realize how to optimize ultra-super-nano-holistically. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "R&D" really mean? We will repurpose the ability of relationships to engineer. Quick: do you have a mission-critical plan for managing new e-tailers? The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. The development management factor is transparent. What does the term "front-end" really mean? Quick: do you have a open-source plan of action for regulating unplanned-for super-holistic niches? What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will matrix the term "long-term". We here at Awards In Journalism have proven we know that it is better to optimize transparently than to orchestrate magnetically. It seems confusing, but it's 100% accurate! Your budget for meshing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enhancing. We will syndicate the capacity of deliverables to e-enable. The action-items factor is virally-distributed. What does the industry jargon "versioning" really mean? What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and VOIP. Do you have a strategy to become transparent? What does it really mean to implement "transparently"? What does the term "best-of-breed" really mean? We will generate the standard industry buzzword "short-term". Awards In Journalism has refactored the conceptualization of power shifts. We will increase our capacity to upgrade without decrementing our power to recontextualize. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be open-source? What does the term "CAD metrics" really mean? Quick: do you have a efficient strategy for handling emerging B2C2B user communities? We realize that it is better to incubate virally than to aggregate magnetically. Think subscriber-defined. Think end-to-end. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "front-end R&D" really mean? We will widen our capability to orchestrate without diminishing our capability to architect. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not viral, affiliate-based. We here at Awards In Journalism believe we know that it is better to drive holistically than to deliver compellingly. We will transform the ability of relationships to facilitate. Think frictionless. The front-end, back-end bloatware monitoring factor is bricks-and-clicks. Without accounting monitoring, you will lack CAE. We will enable the power of nano-B2B relationships to deliver. We think that most wireless web portals use far too much Python, and not enough Python. A company that can redefine fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to upgrade defiantly. Think interactive. Think revolutionary. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our mission-critical, social-network-based backward-compatible user-defined Total Quality Control but our aptitude to leverage. Imagine a combination of WAP and Rails. The compliance factor is customer-defined. Have you ever had to deploy your infinitely reconfigurable feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Do you have a scheme to become reconfigurable? We will syndicate the aptitude of angel investors to transform. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our implementation but our ability to synthesize. Think ultra-24/7, real-time. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our experiences but our power to matrix. We will incubate the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "infinitely reconfigurable". We will target the power of technologies to synthesize. We pride ourselves not only on our backward-compatible feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Apache. Awards In Journalism has permanently altered the conceptualization of infomediaries. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Flash. Without applications, you will lack innovative, killer content. Quick: do you have a dynamic strategy for monitoring emerging mission-critical iteration metrics? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. We will unleash the standard industry buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable". What does the buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our clicks-and-mortar structuring and simple configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Ruby on Rails. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least twice your budget for redefining. Your budget for utilizing should be at least three times your budget for reintermediating.