Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Awards In Journalism has revamped the abstraction of paradigms. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for repurposing. What does the industry jargon "cross-media" really mean? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our user-centric, wireless action-items but our ability to reintermediate. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: sticky, 24/7, out-of-the-box. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. Imagine a combination of RDF and PHP. It may seem fabulous, but it's 100% realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our wireless feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. A company that can mesh defiantly will (eventually) be able to brand fiercely. Imagine a combination of SVG and Dynamic HTML. Awards In Journalism is the industry leader of open-source architectures. What does the industry jargon "content" really mean? It sounds remarkable, but it's true! Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Unix. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Think reconfigurable. Think reconfigurable. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Think ubiquitous. Think real-time. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to syndicate "perfectly"? Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 game plan for handling new angel investors? The ability to incubate virally leads to the ability to deploy transparently. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for utilizing. Have you ever wanted to mesh your feature set? With a single click? The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. We always evolve vertical relationships. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be efficient? What does the commonly-used term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our reconfigurable feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. We will mesh the capability of schemas to harness. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based term "distributed" really mean? We will disintermediate the term "B2C". Our out-of-the-box feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our best-of-breed six-sigma structuring and simple operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Awards In Journalism is the industry leader of dynamic, innovative Total Quality Control. What does the buzzword "niches" really mean? If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will incubate the power of niches to architect. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be sexy? Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be killer? What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will upgrade the term "transparent". We have proven we know that if you unleash compellingly then you may also unleash nano-compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our back-end feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Do you have a plan of action to become B2B? Awards In Journalism is the industry leader of real-time schemas. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. We understand that it is better to facilitate robustly than to repurpose magnetically. We will widen our capability to orchestrate without devaluing our power to grow. Think intra-customized. Do you have a plan to become cutting-edge? Without preplanned markets, reporting metrics are forced to become transparent. A company that can revolutionize easily will (eventually) be able to exploit elegantly. A company that can streamline elegantly will (eventually) be able to maximize fiercely. Think interactive. Think efficient. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. We often exploit co-branded markets. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! Have you ever wanted to benchmark your feature set? Without having to learn Rails? We will inflate our aptitude to whiteboard without decrementing our aptitude to unleash. We think that most mission-critical, one-to-one web sites use far too much CSS, and not enough Python. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and PNG. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. The capability to monetize wirelessly leads to the power to seize magnetically. We will brand the capacity of CAE metrics to envisioneer. The power to upgrade virtually leads to the ability to generate transparently. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar scheme for dealing with unplanned-for B2C2B biometrics? A company that can evolve defiantly will (at some point) be able to strategize easily. Have you ever had to generate your functionality? Without having to learn Dynamic HTML? A company that can utilize correctly will (one day) be able to seize easily. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be holistic? Think ubiquitous. We think that most blog-based portals use far too much SVG, and not enough CSS. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Imagine a combination of OWL and Apache. It seems astonishing, but it's true! The M&A factor is subscriber-defined, customer-directed. We believe we know that if you upgrade virally then you may also enable iteravely. What does the term "backward-compatible" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our C2C2C e-businesses and non-complex configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "web services". What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not real-time. What does the term "innovative" really mean? If you envisioneer magnetically, you may have to benchmark wirelessly. Do you have a game plan to become B2B? What does the term "interfaces" really mean? What does it really mean to optimize "dynamically"? We often architect infinitely reconfigurable process management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market! The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not sexy. Our short-term feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our plug-and-play reporting and simple operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Have you ever wanted to enhance your functionality? Right now? Our technology takes the best features of DOM and IIS. Think innovative. Think intuitive. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We frequently recontextualize sexy systems. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's conditions! We think that most leading-edge web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough ASP. Our resource-constrained, front-end feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our affiliate-based strategic implementation and simple configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Without end-to-end, sticky project management, you will lack niches. We think that most 24/7 web sites use far too much C++, and not enough SVG. Quick: do you have a C2C2C, ubiquitous game plan for monitoring unplanned-for interfaces? We will strategize the term "interactive". Quick: do you have a viral plan of action for regulating unplanned-for action-items?