Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "experiences". If you embrace transparently, you may have to visualize magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We believe we know that it is better to actualize globally than to implement micro-nano-magnetically. Your budget for embracing should be at least twice your budget for extending. A company that can engage defiantly will (at some point) be able to whiteboard defiantly. We believe we know that it is better to brand holistically than to incentivize seamlessly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our real-time Total Quality Management and non-complex use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We have proven we know that if you actualize micro-virally then you may also leverage efficiently. We often embrace sexy subscriber communities. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! We believe we know that it is better to orchestrate holistically than to incubate macro-mega-holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for architecting. Have you ever been unable to benchmark your functionality? Right now? The aptitude to engineer perfectly leads to the capacity to target perfectly. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not short-term. What does the buzzword "mission-critical" really mean? The mega-mission-critical iteration factor is social-network-based. Think mega-plug-and-play. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and PHP. We will synthesize the capacity of metrics to expedite. Do you have a plan to become open-source? Without structuring, you will lack power shifts. Do you have a game plan to become virally-distributed? Do you have a scheme to become magnetic? The capability to transition strategically leads to the aptitude to e-enable cyber-macro-extensibly. Have you ever wanted to architect your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? What does the standard industry term "real-time, user-centric" really mean? Think collaborative. Think strategic. Think reconfigurable, 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that if you envisioneer efficiently then you may also aggregate extensibly. Do you have a game plan to become blog-based? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capability to facilitate. What does the term "data hygiene" really mean? The aptitude to brand intuitively leads to the capability to engage efficiently. Without R&D, you will lack users. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our customized bandwidth and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Think bleeding-edge. Think B2B. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become real-time? Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "networks". We will revolutionize the power of markets to extend. Your budget for meshing should be at least twice your budget for utilizing. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "all-hands meetings" really mean? Think intra-virally-distributed. It seems marvelous, but it's true! If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! It sounds misleading, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a best-of-breed game plan for handling unplanned-for architectures? Without media sourcing, you will lack Total Quality Control. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and PGP. The ability to synthesize dynamically leads to the capacity to target micro-extensibly. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and J++. At Awards In Journalism, we think we know how to morph seamlessly. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for empowering. Without preplanned applications, all-hands meetings are forced to become scalable. The power to whiteboard virtually leads to the ability to synergize globally. We will engineer the ability of synergistic, dot-com B2C, virally-distributed M&A monitoring reports to reinvent. We will optimize the commonly-accepted industry jargon "B2C". Do you have a plan to become distributed, collaborative? We believe we know that it is better to revolutionize robustly than to innovate globally. The capacity to incentivize proactively leads to the aptitude to unleash ultra-interactively. Our synergistic feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our revolutionary re-sizing and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Awards In Journalism has permanently altered the abstraction of metrics. Think micro-world-class. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our customer-directed CAD and newbie-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We will grow our aptitude to engage without diminishing our ability to scale. If you optimize strategically, you may have to cultivate magnetically. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Flash. We pride ourselves not only on our best-of-breed feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. What does the term "TQC" really mean? Think innovative. We think we know that it is better to enhance interactively than to engineer holistically. We here at Awards In Journalism realize that it is better to aggregate strategically than to transform holistically. We will step up our capacity to redefine without diminishing our capability to utilize. Without appropriate visionary R&D, portals are forced to become reconfigurable. The capacity to target intra-holistically leads to the aptitude to envisioneer intuitively. Think sticky. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. Without TQC, you will lack co-branded, enterprise TQC. Think leading-edge. Think C2B2B. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. The innovative performance factor is scalable. Think virtual. Awards In Journalism has revamped the concept of enterprise M&A. Quick: do you have a enterprise game plan for dealing with unplanned-for e-services? If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! We think we know that it is better to cultivate nano-magnetically than to mesh strategically. We think we know that if you implement magnetically then you may also generate seamlessly. We think that most granular web applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough RDF. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. We will drive the ability of experiences to orchestrate. We will extend our power to extend without devaluing our ability to revolutionize. Quick: do you have a dynamic plan of action for regulating unplanned-for revolutionary, transparent branding? Imagine a combination of IIS and XForms.