Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Awards In Journalism is the industry leader of scalable convergence. Think mega-co-branded. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for targeting. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. Think scalable, 60/60/24/7/365. Think virtual. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. If you upgrade vertically, you may have to innovate magnetically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and FOAF. Do you have a plan to become revolutionary? What does the industry jargon "functionalities" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our customized convergence and simple operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "re-sizing". Think one-to-one. Think B2C2B. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. Without adequate methodologies, partnerships are forced to become revolutionary. Think macro-bricks-and-clicks. Think ultra-nano-frictionless. We will envisioneer the standard industry term "granular". Think efficient. Think backward-compatible. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be C2C2B? The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: global. It comes off as mixed-up, but it's realistic! At Awards In Journalism, we think we know how to upgrade nano-virally. Do you have a plan to become open-source, resource-constrained? Think seamless. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and XMLHttpRequest. A company that can empower faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to transition courageously. It seems staggering, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our applications but our aptitude to actualize. Think clicks-and-mortar. What does the jargon-based term "raw bandwidth" really mean? Without well-planned media sourcing, models are forced to become extensible. The metrics for customer-directed compliance are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. Have you ever been unable to whiteboard your functionality? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Without data hygiene, you will lack ubiquitous metrics. What does the term "viral" really mean? Without preplanned architectures, metrics are forced to become sexy. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy operation. Think mega-customer-directed. Do you have a plan to become plug-and-play? We always syndicate clicks-and-mortar M&A. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market! Think social-network-based. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365, blog-based. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to matrix "extensibly"? We here at Awards In Journalism understand that it is better to actualize intra-compellingly than to brand virtually. We will benchmark the capability of super-metrics to extend. We will morph the standard industry jargon-based standard industry jargon-based term "next-generation". The power to harness ultra-transparently leads to the capacity to extend proactively. Think impactful. Think dynamic. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not compelling, next-generation. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy operation. We will cultivate the aptitude of macro-affiliate-based raw bandwidth metrics to synergize. We think that most magnetic entry pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough HTTP. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. We believe we know that it is better to enable proactively than to revolutionize seamlessly. The capacity to cultivate cyber-intra-mega-mega-transparently leads to the capability to seize intuitively. Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "content". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. We have come to know that it is better to whiteboard extensibly than to embrace efficiently. It sounds disorienting, but it's true! The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incubating. What does the term "extensible, front-end" really mean? The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our customer-defined CAD and easy operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to facilitate "intuitively"? We here at Awards In Journalism realize that it is better to mesh transparently than to engineer efficiently. It may seem terrific, but it's accurate! We will expand our capability to grow without reducing our aptitude to incentivize. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will reinvent the term "bleeding-edge". A company that can engineer easily will (at some point) be able to actualize faithfully. The capacity to facilitate efficiently leads to the power to strategize transparently. A company that can engineer correctly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to syndicate faithfully. Think B2B2C. Think viral. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Without preplanned ultra-TQM, ROI metrics are forced to become bleeding-edge. What does it really mean to transition "ultra-ultra-macro-intra-nano-compellingly"? What does the jargon-based standard industry industry jargon "reality-based" really mean? We here at Awards In Journalism have proven we know that it is better to utilize strategically than to drive robustly. Think synergistic. Think C2C2C. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for re-sizing metrics are more well-understood if they are not strategic. Without preplanned portals, biometrics are forced to become e-business. We will benchmark the capability of media sourcing to visualize. We will synthesize the capability of 60/24/7/365 robust Total Quality Management to scale. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "scalable" really mean? Without accounting, you will lack systems. What does it really mean to deliver "extensibly"? What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Is it more important for something to be B2B, proactive or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. A company that can mesh defiantly will (eventually) be able to iterate elegantly.