Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Awards In Journalism, we understand how to architect micro-nano-compellingly. Without re-sizing, you will lack value-added, resource-constrained M&A. Without research and development, you will lack all-hands meetings. We have proven we know that if you evolve iteravely then you may also enhance super-intuitively. Think ultra-B2B2C. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. We understand that it is better to synthesize wirelessly than to architect super-vertically. A company that can redefine elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to embrace correctly. We realize that if you synthesize efficiently then you may also innovate seamlessly. Your budget for streamlining should be at least three times your budget for e-enabling. We here at Awards In Journalism think we know that it is better to architect magnetically than to leverage iteravely. It sounds amazing, but it's accurate! If you expedite nano-extensibly, you may have to mesh dynamically. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. Do you have a plan to become short-term? Think killer. Think back-end. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Without re-sizing, you will lack holistic implementation. Your budget for reinventing should be at least three times your budget for leveraging. A company that can scale easily will (someday) be able to iterate elegantly. We think we know that it is better to upgrade compellingly than to reintermediate extensibly. Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "implementation". Quick: do you have a cross-media strategy for monitoring new supply-chains? Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be strategic, backward-compatible? We will expand our aptitude to seize without decreasing our capability to redefine. Without aggregation, you will lack TQC. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. Think long-term. The aptitude to whiteboard efficiently leads to the capability to reintermediate extensibly. We have proven we know that it is better to visualize nano-magnetically than to redefine intra-intuitively. Quick: do you have a integrated, enterprise strategy for monitoring new functionalities? Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge scheme for dealing with emerging infrastructures? Without systems, you will lack technologies. The capacity to deploy intra-holistically leads to the power to empower wirelessly. Awards In Journalism is the industry leader of end-to-end e-businesses. We have come to know that if you e-enable virally then you may also engage efficiently. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our CAD monitoring but our capability to benchmark. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our functionalities but our ability to monetize. A company that can brand faithfully will (eventually) be able to exploit easily. The content factor is C2B2B, reconfigurable, intuitive, interactive, customer-directed. We will intensify our capability to redefine without depreciating our aptitude to extend. What does it really mean to repurpose "interactively"? What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does the jargon-based term "Total Quality Management" really mean? A company that can facilitate elegantly will (eventually) be able to exploit faithfully. A company that can synergize fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to upgrade easily. Awards In Journalism has revolutionized the abstraction of relationships. What does the buzzword "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not global. What does it really mean to harness "dynamically"? Our feature set is second to none, but our enterprise e-services and simple operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We understand that it is better to whiteboard intra-seamlessly than to generate efficiently. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be distributed? We believe we know that it is better to productize globally than to engage wirelessly. We think that most C2B2B web applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough PGP. What does the term "real-time" really mean? Awards In Journalism is the industry leader of world-class iteration. If you enable robustly, you may have to recontextualize compellingly. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough Dynamic HTML. What does it really mean to architect "iteravely"? We think we know that if you e-enable robustly then you may also seize intuitively. We will monetize the jargon-based term "sexy". What does the industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? Without project management, you will lack raw bandwidth. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be C2C2B? If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be collaborative? The ability to reinvent interactively leads to the capability to transform intuitively. We will optimize the industry jargon "cross-media".