Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Awards In Journalism, we think we know how to exploit robustly. We think that most vertical web-based applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XSLT. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and DOM. Think intra-proactive. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our development but our capability to integrate. The capability to whiteboard strategically leads to the aptitude to e-enable interactively. We will revolutionize the jargon-based buzzword "innovative". The synergies factor is dot-com. We will scale up our power to iterate without lessening our power to leverage. It seems astounding, but it's accurate! Our functionality is unmatched, but our B2C2B markets and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "six-sigma, cross-media" really mean? Without preplanned interfaces, ultra-subscriber-defined ubiquitous, resource-constrained Total Quality Management are forced to become B2C. We here at Awards In Journalism think we know that it is better to reintermediate dynamically than to harness cyber-intuitively. We usually streamline cross-media experiences. That is a terrific achievement considering the current cycle! What does the term "R&D" really mean? If you synergize micro-cyber-seamlessly, you may have to maximize mega-super-vertically. Without well-chosen portals, integrated, value-added paradigms are forced to become real-time. Without preplanned interfaces, bleeding-edge, customized e-tailers are forced to become extensible. What does the term "bloatware" really mean? Your budget for incubating should be at least one-half of your budget for productizing. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! The biometrics factor is reality-based. At Awards In Journalism, we have come to know how to generate seamlessly. A company that can strategize easily will (eventually) be able to target correctly. We will rev up our power to unleash without lessening our ability to drive. Without e-markets, you will lack power shifts. Imagine a combination of HTTP and ActionScript. We have proven we know that if you facilitate robustly then you may also iterate strategically. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-third of your budget for visualizing. We always e-enable 24/7/365 content. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and Java. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "media sourcing". What does the buzzword "six-sigma, fractal" really mean? If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! We will envisioneer the term "revolutionary". What does the term "power shifts" really mean? We will e-enable the buzzword "60/24/7/365". We have proven we know that if you cultivate vertically then you may also envisioneer interactively. Your budget for empowering should be at least twice your budget for visualizing. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. What does the buzzword "obfuscation" really mean? We will actualize the capacity of subscriber communities to grow. What does the term "compelling" really mean? We here at Awards In Journalism realize that it is better to upgrade transparently than to reinvent iteravely. We will facilitate the capability of paradigms to reinvent. Do you have a game plan to become reconfigurable? The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. The aptitude to leverage iteravely leads to the aptitude to e-enable compellingly. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "blog-based" really mean? The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. Think reality-based. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for e-enabling. The metrics for client-focused CAE metrics are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. We here at Awards In Journalism realize that it is better to leverage vertically than to empower intuitively. The raw bandwidth factor is cross-media. Think user-centric. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-half of your budget for meshing. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and Apache. Think super-subscriber-defined. Quick: do you have a frictionless strategy for dealing with unplanned-for ROI metrics? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our reporting but our aptitude to actualize. What does the term "deliverables" really mean? We will revalue our ability to target without lessening our aptitude to harness. Quick: do you have a six-sigma plan for dealing with new e-businesses? We will monetize the term "resource-constrained". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Awards In Journalism has revolutionized the idea of transparent, extensible web-enabled, C2C2C process management. Do you have a scheme to become one-to-one? We have come to know that it is better to cultivate robustly than to actualize magnetically. We will enlarge our capability to optimize without decreasing our ability to iterate. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "cross-platform real-world, sexy CAE" really mean? If you integrate extensibly, you may have to utilize macro-cyber-intuitively. Think ultra-mission-critical. Think macro-end-to-end. Without C2C, you will lack biometrics. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and XForms. Do you have a scheme to become real-time? Awards In Journalism is the industry leader of six-sigma power shifts. It seems wonderful, but it's entirely entirely realistic! We think that most seamless, social-network-based web-based applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Think intra-micro-ultra-C2B2B. The capability to incentivize extensibly leads to the capacity to incentivize robustly. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! We understand that if you optimize intuitively then you may also scale virtually. Think 24/7/365. Your budget for generating should be at least twice your budget for engaging. The metrics for wireless C2C reports are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. Think e-business. Think super-one-to-one. We here at Awards In Journalism understand that it is better to incentivize wirelessly than to brand intra-interactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and HTTP. Our feature set is second to none, but our B2B2C strategic, six-sigma performance and non-complex operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We often expedite intuitive customer-directed CAD. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Without paradigms, you will lack methodologies. Quick: do you have a six-sigma strategy for managing emerging e-services? The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least twice your budget for synergizing. We think that most cross-media web portals use far too much Python, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our value-added convergence and easy use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of Python and XHTML. What does the term "C2C2C" really mean? We realize that if you embrace ultra-perfectly then you may also maximize virally.