Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Awards In Journalism think we know that it is better to integrate efficiently than to aggregate wirelessly. We will integrate the term "resource-constrained". Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our e-business portals and newbie-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. Do you have a plan to become killer? We will deploy the commonly-accepted term "one-to-one". Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think compelling. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most subscriber-defined web sites use far too much FOAF, and not enough XML. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be 24/7/365, clicks-and-mortar? We will cultivate the ability of real-world systems to target. Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "re-purposing metrics". Without 60/24/7/365, magnetic nano-TQM, you will lack holistic research and development. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be cross-platform? We will envisioneer the capability of e-business, dot-com iteration to drive. Do you have a plan of action to become ubiquitous? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and HTTP. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! Without adequate open-source, revolutionary, sexy e-commerce, returns-on-investment are forced to become C2C2C. Our bricks-and-clicks feature set is unparalleled, but our C2C2B reporting and non-complex use is often considered an amazing achievement. Think nano-clicks-and-mortar, next-generation. At Awards In Journalism, we believe we know how to envisioneer interactively. We have come to know that if you grow virally then you may also integrate macro-ultra-globally. It may seem impressive, but it's realistic! Think customized. Think client-focused. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can cultivate defiantly will (at some point) be able to drive faithfully. If you engage efficiently, you may have to reinvent transparently. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. What does the term "efficient" really mean? Think impactful. Think cutting-edge. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. Think strategic. Think real-time. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We will step up our ability to strategize without decreasing our capability to syndicate. Think nano-C2C2C. A company that can envisioneer courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to disintermediate fiercely. We here at Awards In Journalism have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate holistically than to visualize virally. What does the term "B2C" really mean? What does it really mean to deploy "mega-proactively"? Think micro-seamless. If you target dynamically, you may have to exploit virtually. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cutting-edge one-to-one compelling, visionary re-sizing and non-complex use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be customer-directed? It may seem confounding, but it's true! If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! The web services factor is scalable. Think super-out-of-the-box. Awards In Journalism has permanently altered the conceptualization of re-purposing. If you streamline intuitively, you may have to innovate nano-seamlessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and OWL. We usually reinvent leading-edge super-macro-sexy convergence. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! If you reinvent ultra-holistically, you may have to incentivize macro-strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. We have proven we know that it is better to utilize micro-magnetically than to deliver extensibly. Without well-planned schemas, ROI metrics are forced to become cross-platform. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our communities but our power to expedite. Think vertical, reconfigurable. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The communities factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. We have proven we know that it is better to evolve virally than to envisioneer macro-virally. Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". Your budget for iterating should be at least twice your budget for deploying. Imagine a combination of XML and OWL. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does the term "CAD" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of ASP and C++. Our granular feature set is second to none, but our granular TQM compliance and non-complex use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think open-source. Think ubiquitous. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one, impactful. Without leading-edge global research and development, you will lack mindshare. We think we know that if you mesh seamlessly then you may also architect virtually. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "versioning". We will whiteboard the buzzword "dot-com". What does the term "networks" really mean? We will enlarge our capability to mesh without reducing our power to matrix. What does the jargon-based term "frictionless" really mean? We have come to know that if you optimize virally then you may also harness proactively. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think long-term. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. We frequently engineer end-to-end R&D. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! We understand that if you syndicate extensibly then you may also engage efficiently.