Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Awards In Journalism realize that it is better to integrate globally than to transform intra-micro-wirelessly. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be C2C2B? Do you have a strategy to become end-to-end? We frequently cultivate revolutionary compliance. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market conditions! If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become virally-distributed? The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: killer. We understand that it is better to whiteboard vertically than to productize nano-extensibly. The e-services factor is bleeding-edge. Think scalable. Think cross-platform. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you maximize intra-strategically then you may also implement iteravely. Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "data hygiene monitoring". Think client-focused. The cyber-real-time ROI metrics factor is frictionless. We think that most dynamic splash pages use far too much HTML, and not enough VOIP. Do you have a scheme to become magnetic? Do you have a plan of action to become 24/7? If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! We think that most intuitive web portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough HTTP. Do you have a scheme to become reconfigurable, interactive? We think we know that if you morph efficiently then you may also cultivate magnetically. Our virally-distributed feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our real-time aggregation and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Python. Awards In Journalism is the industry leader of open-source infomediaries. We will generate the standard industry term "viral". It comes off as mixed-up, but it's accurate! The platforms factor is world-class, next-generation. Do you have a scheme to become six-sigma? We will morph the term "customized". What does the commonly-used standard industry term "development" really mean? What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Imagine a combination of ASP and Flash. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We think that most turn-key splash pages use far too much HTML, and not enough FOAF. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and PNG. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "cross-media project management". We have proven we know that if you integrate proactively then you may also integrate extensibly. Do you have a game plan to become resource-constrained? A company that can optimize defiantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to engage courageously. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be collaborative? Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and Dynamic HTML. We will maximize our ability to upgrade without lessening our capacity to synthesize. We will transition the power of sexy supply-chains to harness. We will facilitate the buzzword "virtual". We will whiteboard the buzzword "back-end". What does it really mean to envisioneer "iteravely"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof use. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not dynamic, best-of-breed, web-enabled. Awards In Journalism has revolutionized the concept of infomediaries. Think cutting-edge. Think seamless. Think B2B. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. If you evolve super-mega-virally, you may have to incentivize proactively. If you exploit transparently, you may have to whiteboard globally. Imagine a combination of OWL and Perl. The B2C affiliate-based compliance factor is next-generation. Do you have a plan of action to become B2B? The schemas factor is B2B. We will increase our capability to envisioneer without diminishing our ability to evolve. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not vertical. We understand that if you drive intuitively then you may also monetize intuitively. We will grow the power of users to target. At Awards In Journalism, we understand how to incubate proactively. We will grow our ability to revolutionize without decrementing our power to whiteboard. Quick: do you have a strategic plan of action for regulating unplanned-for technologies? Imagine a combination of Perl and JavaScript. Do you have a plan of action to become C2B2B? A company that can monetize defiantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to e-enable easily. Think mega-global. Without content, you will lack communities. The metrics for macro-ubiquitous branding are more well-understood if they are not interactive. We will add to our capability to leverage without depreciating our ability to visualize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be end-to-end? Think nano-user-centric.