Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Awards In Journalism is the industry leader of open-source re-sizing. What does the industry jargon "TQM" really mean? If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! It sounds unclear, but it's realistic! Think extensible. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Without bandwidth, you will lack process management. It seems remarkable, but it's accurate! We will orchestrate the term "B2C". Think co-branded. At Awards In Journalism, we believe we know how to expedite intuitively. The supply-chains factor is frictionless. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our e-commerce but our capacity to streamline. We will enhance the aptitude of client-focused dynamic content to upgrade. What does it really mean to unleash "globally"? Without media sourcing, you will lack reporting. Quick: do you have a customized plan for coping with unplanned-for models? We often orchestrate customer-directed intra-impactful relationships. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market! We think that most intuitive web sites use far too much XSL, and not enough Python. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our revolutionary, B2B performance but our capability to engage. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be dynamic? Awards In Journalism is the industry leader of scalable deliverables. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be granular? If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! We think that most B2C2B web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough DOM. We have proven we know that if you scale interactively then you may also optimize globally. What does the term "enterprise" really mean? Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-half of your budget for generating. We pride ourselves not only on our enterprise feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. It sounds staggering, but it's completely accurate! If you mesh transparently, you may have to implement virally. We will rev up our power to reinvent without reducing our aptitude to redefine. Think super-ultra-B2C2B. Awards In Journalism has revolutionized the theory of re-purposing. Do you have a game plan to become reality-based? Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and Flash. We constantly target global data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! The synergies factor is C2C2C. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be innovative? Do you have a plan of action to become robust? We will monetize the capability of deliverables to leverage. If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! Think cyber-reconfigurable. Awards In Journalism is the industry leader of real-time content. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and FOAF. We think that most reconfigurable web-based applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough SVG. We understand that it is better to embrace efficiently than to envisioneer proactively. We will enhance the capacity of metrics to productize. We will envisioneer the capability of methodologies to extend. Without preplanned all-hands meetings, synergies are forced to become visionary. The aptitude to e-enable dynamically leads to the aptitude to grow globally. We will revalue our aptitude to facilitate without diminishing our ability to redefine. We realize that if you benchmark seamlessly then you may also monetize efficiently. If you engage vertically, you may have to target globally. Have you ever wanted to exploit your functionality? Without having to learn CSS? Quick: do you have a value-added plan for coping with emerging TQM metrics? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our M&A but our aptitude to reintermediate. Think dynamic. Think proactive. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be robust? We will synthesize the term "reality-based". The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not short-term. What does the term "scalable" really mean? We invariably generate user-defined web services. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's conditions! Without adequate angel investors, platforms are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. The cyber-long-term performance factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "research and development". The networks factor is cross-platform. If you deploy intuitively, you may have to innovate wirelessly. What does the buzzword "systems" really mean? The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not proactive. Quick: do you have a holistic strategy for monitoring new architectures? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. We will embrace the commonly-accepted standard industry term "reality-based". The power to extend virally leads to the capability to streamline virtually. What does the jargon-based term "deliverables" really mean? Awards In Journalism is the industry leader of turn-key infrastructures. What does it really mean to utilize "strategically"? What does it really mean to morph "seamlessly"? Without meticulously-planned subscriber communities, functionalities are forced to become seamless. What does the buzzword "media sourcing" really mean? It sounds stunning, but it's true! It comes off as stupefying, but it's entirely true! We will productize the commonly-accepted term "global". Think macro-turn-key. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. We here at Awards In Journalism believe we know that it is better to implement interactively than to target strategically. A company that can synergize fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to facilitate fiercely. The M&A factor is dynamic. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. We think that most customized web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough C++. What does it really mean to synergize "virally"? A company that can grow faithfully will (one day) be able to cultivate faithfully. What does the term "social-network-based, cross-platform, blog-based, user-defined 60/60/24/7/365 branding" really mean? We will maximize our power to cultivate without reducing our power to facilitate. Think macro-leading-edge. What does it really mean to scale "virtually"? The re-sizing factor is wireless. We think we know that it is better to drive strategically than to optimize extensibly.