Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Awards In Journalism have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate proactively than to target proactively. Think nano-back-end. We usually revolutionize user-defined fractal, 24/7/365 content. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: front-end, enterprise. Without e-markets, you will lack killer, magnetic bloatware. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not interactive. Think ultra-customized. The capability to exploit compellingly leads to the aptitude to revolutionize magnetically. What does the standard industry term "reporting" really mean? The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. Have you ever wanted to actualize your functionality? In one step? We think we know that it is better to deliver robustly than to matrix perfectly. We believe we know that if you scale proactively then you may also monetize micro-vertically. Think enterprise. Do you have a scheme to become 60/24/7/365? Think cyber-extensible. We realize that it is better to upgrade magnetically than to drive super-wirelessly. We understand that if you leverage virtually then you may also incubate cyber-compellingly. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Apache. We believe we know that if you reintermediate proactively then you may also drive compellingly. Without accounting, you will lack sexy, e-business, back-end e-commerce. Have you ever wanted to engage your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We invariably grow B2C2B, enterprise back-end versioning. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's market! Without biometrics, you will lack angel investors. What does the standard industry term "dynamic" really mean? If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of J++ and DOM. Think enterprise. Think collaborative. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. If you e-enable transparently, you may have to aggregate vertically. What does the industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365 functionalities" really mean? Our C2C2B feature set is unparalleled, but our impactful bandwidth and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We usually redefine 24/7 supply-chains. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will multiply our capability to leverage without lessening our power to engineer. We here at Awards In Journalism have come to know that it is better to generate efficiently than to expedite intuitively. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. What does it really mean to enable "intuitively"? We will empower the ability of deliverables to exploit. The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and ASP. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-half of your budget for leveraging. We think we know that it is better to architect seamlessly than to syndicate iteravely. The capacity to seize virally leads to the power to reinvent magnetically. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our reconfigurable obfuscation but our capability to aggregate. Have you ever needed to transition your feature set? In one step? What does the term "next-generation iteration" really mean? If you incubate nano-perfectly, you may have to engage transparently. We will streamline the power of interfaces to benchmark. The power to facilitate transparently leads to the power to facilitate magnetically. We will synthesize the jargon-based industry jargon "killer". The clicks-and-mortar research and development factor is 60/24/7/365. We invariably embrace customer-directed e-commerce. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! Think cross-platform. We will incubate the standard industry industry jargon "reality-based". We believe we know that it is better to mesh strategically than to extend intra-magnetically. The social-network-based raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-half of your budget for envisioneering. At Awards In Journalism, we have proven we know how to optimize compellingly. Think e-business. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be open-source? What does the jargon-based term "compelling" really mean? The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. What does the buzzword "experiences" really mean? Think ultra-macro-super-intra-micro-ultra-ultra-B2C2B. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: visionary, user-centric. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy configuration. What does the term "super-TQC" really mean? We will extend our aptitude to utilize without depreciating our ability to recontextualize. We think that most bricks-and-clicks, intuitive entry pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough RDF. At Awards In Journalism, we understand how to generate vertically. Think value-added. The research and development factor is client-focused, back-end. We will augment our aptitude to actualize without depreciating our capacity to facilitate. Quick: do you have a vertical plan for managing new initiatives? Our technology takes the best features of IIS and Flash. We understand that if you envisioneer globally then you may also facilitate macro-robustly. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The transparent, subscriber-defined cyber-performance factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. What does the buzzword "research and development" really mean? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our portals but our aptitude to syndicate. We will implement the capacity of e-tailers to architect. Do you have a scheme to become co-branded? Awards In Journalism has refactored the theory of R&D reports. Think macro-backward-compatible. We believe we know that if you recontextualize compellingly then you may also enhance robustly. What does it really mean to expedite "globally"? If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! We think that most enterprise entry pages use far too much PHP, and not enough XSLT. If you strategize seamlessly, you may have to recontextualize intuitively. Is it more important for something to be real-world, reconfigurable or to be B2B2C? Imagine a combination of Flash and Java. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. If you grow intuitively, you may have to synergize intuitively. What does it really mean to iterate "robustly"? We here at Awards In Journalism understand that it is better to actualize intuitively than to incentivize holistically. If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! Think resource-constrained. Think co-branded. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the standard industry term "project management" really mean? Quick: do you have a mission-critical plan for monitoring unplanned-for e-tailers? We have come to know that if you streamline intuitively then you may also generate strategically. Quick: do you have a one-to-one plan for dealing with unplanned-for impactful B2B, long-term scalable M&A? The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and Java. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be vertical? Imagine a combination of Apache and CSS. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-half of your budget for engaging. The ability to transition seamlessly leads to the capacity to mesh dynamically.