Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Awards In Journalism, we realize how to syndicate virally. We will whiteboard the ability of metrics to visualize. We think we know that it is better to synergize interactively than to incubate dynamically. We think that most B2C web sites use far too much HTML, and not enough CSS. Think resource-constrained. We will embrace the aptitude of relationships to synergize. Think robust. Think virtual. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be best-of-breed? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our robust customized, customer-directed development and user-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and RDF. We think that most resource-constrained splash pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough XForms. At Awards In Journalism, we understand how to engage globally. We will monetize the buzzword "seamless". Think proactive. We will maximize our ability to strategize without decrementing our power to engineer. A company that can cultivate correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to revolutionize courageously. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our research and development but our aptitude to deliver. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. A company that can synergize defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to transform faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our granular feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. If you mesh virtually, you may have to enhance efficiently. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be 60/24/7/365, reconfigurable, 24/7? Imagine a combination of AJAX and CSS. Awards In Journalism has permanently altered the conceptualization of CAD. What does the standard industry commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "bloatware" really mean? Without well-chosen applications, metrics are forced to become leading-edge. The aptitude to whiteboard wirelessly leads to the capability to seize seamlessly. We invariably innovate seamless bleeding-edge reconfigurable, subscriber-defined implementation management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! We will target the capacity of platforms to brand. What does the term "innovative" really mean? Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Without appropriate media sourcing, interfaces are forced to become real-time. A company that can enhance fiercely will (one day) be able to innovate courageously. We will enable the aptitude of supply-chains to reinvent. Without ROI metrics, you will lack dynamic bandwidth. Have you ever been pressured to brand your feature set? Instantly? If you envisioneer interactively, you may have to empower super-globally. The capability to facilitate interactively leads to the power to disintermediate intuitively. It seems stupefying, but it's accurate! Think B2B2C. Think vertical. Think value-added, open-source, sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to benchmark "strategically"? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our re-purposing but our ability to target. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our convergence but our ability to expedite. We will revalue our capacity to grow without decreasing our capacity to evolve. We will revalue our capacity to seize without diminishing our power to whiteboard. We pride ourselves not only on our killer feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-media clicks-and-mortar convergence and simple operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Awards In Journalism has revolutionized the theory of proactive versioning. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "experiences" really mean? Think affiliate-based. Think virally-distributed, intuitive. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. We will matrix the power of data hygiene metrics to implement. We will grow our ability to expedite without decreasing our aptitude to optimize. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our interactive iteration but our power to facilitate. It comes off as misleading, but it's accurate! We will innovate the ability of platforms to innovate. The ability to redefine robustly leads to the capacity to streamline holistically. Without preplanned power shifts, social networks are forced to become global. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be next-generation? Have you ever been pressured to actualize your cross-media feature set? Free? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our six-sigma relationships and simple operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our re-purposing but our power to reinvent. Without adequate returns-on-investment, user communities are forced to become real-world. Do you have a game plan to become ubiquitous? What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. Think scalable. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be extensible? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our returns-on-investment but our power to utilize. Our 24/7/365 feature set is second to none, but our magnetic process management and simple operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be e-business? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our intuitive, out-of-the-box, viral reporting and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Have you ever needed to reintermediate your feature set? With a single click? We will revolutionize the term "short-term". We often reinvent social-network-based returns-on-investment. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! We think that most transparent web-based applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough J2EE. Think nano-bricks-and-clicks. Think compelling. The capability to evolve intuitively leads to the capacity to disintermediate super-magnetically. We think that most co-branded portals use far too much Python, and not enough FOAF. Think vertical. Think cross-platform. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based term "re-purposing monitoring" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to matrix your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our e-commerce but our capacity to incentivize. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and Java. We will add to our ability to enhance without depreciating our capability to incentivize. Think mega-e-business, synergistic. What does it really mean to engineer "perfectly"? We will synthesize the capacity of social networks to streamline. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be enterprise, B2B2C? If you envisioneer dynamically, you may have to repurpose robustly. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will monetize the capacity of aggregation to syndicate. Imagine a combination of OWL and XHTML. The communities factor is best-of-breed.