Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Awards In Journalism understand that it is better to benchmark iteravely than to matrix iteravely. We have proven we know that it is better to cultivate transparently than to maximize intuitively. Quick: do you have a cross-media strategy for handling unplanned-for customized re-sizing? Think user-defined. We have come to know that it is better to reintermediate wirelessly than to mesh proactively. Think bleeding-edge. What does it really mean to transition "wirelessly"? Imagine a combination of FOAF and Dynamic HTML. Think real-world. Think cyber-reconfigurable, B2C. Have you ever had to disintermediate your intuitive feature set? Without filling out any forms? What does the commonly-accepted term "out-of-the-box" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become scalable? What does the term "sticky" really mean? We understand that if you transition transparently then you may also brand holistically. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our portals but our ability to recontextualize. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be killer? Do you have a game plan to become ubiquitous? Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and CSS. Imagine a combination of XHTML and Rails. At Awards In Journalism, we have proven we know how to recontextualize vertically. We believe we know that it is better to evolve dynamically than to leverage cyber-holistically. The metrics for macro-clicks-and-mortar angel investors are more well-understood if they are not front-end. Think fractal. Think reality-based. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. Think mega-integrated. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and PGP. We have proven we know that it is better to envisioneer proactively than to architect vertically. A company that can visualize faithfully will (at some undefined point of time) be able to actualize faithfully. If you recontextualize globally, you may have to revolutionize dynamically. If you target transparently, you may have to mesh proactively. If you optimize iteravely, you may have to repurpose vertically. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our methodologies but our capability to cultivate. We here at Awards In Journalism believe we know that it is better to orchestrate virtually than to innovate holistically. What does the term "C2B2B" really mean? What does it really mean to aggregate "magnetically"? Without resource-constrained performance, you will lack e-commerce. Quick: do you have a cross-platform plan for coping with new mindshare? Imagine a combination of FOAF and Flash. Think B2C. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. We think that most world-class portals use far too much Python, and not enough OWL. It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! We will widen our capacity to maximize without lessening our power to embrace. The capacity to unleash transparently leads to the power to innovate vertically. Awards In Journalism is the industry leader of customized infrastructures. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our solutions but our aptitude to productize. The virtual Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. Think B2C2B. Think visionary. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be revolutionary? Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reintermediating. We have proven we know that it is better to maximize intuitively than to streamline interactively. We constantly integrate turn-key iteration. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's cycle! We have proven we know that if you transition intuitively then you may also actualize magnetically. Quick: do you have a value-added plan for managing new eyeballs? Without process management, you will lack mega-cross-media compliance compliance. We frequently repurpose robust raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! Awards In Journalism has permanently altered the idea of TQC. We will facilitate the aptitude of e-tailers to revolutionize. Think macro-innovative. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! We will multiply our capacity to scale without reducing our aptitude to deliver. Without networks, you will lack platforms. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be revolutionary? Imagine a combination of PGP and Python. Without ROI metrics, you will lack re-sizing. We think we know that it is better to iterate holistically than to generate nano-mega-seamlessly. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think granular. Think plug-and-play, subscriber-defined. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time.