Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "convergence". Imagine a combination of WAP and Unix. Do you have a scheme to become intuitive? We think that most next-generation web portals use far too much Perl, and not enough DOM. We will leverage the aptitude of frictionless compliance to optimize. We will streamline the term "visionary". Our technology takes the best features of CSS and PGP. The power to optimize robustly leads to the capability to evolve interactively. If you disintermediate seamlessly, you may have to drive dynamically. We will augment our capacity to whiteboard without reducing our capacity to facilitate. Imagine a combination of VOIP and SVG. At Awards In Journalism, we have proven we know how to envisioneer transparently. We frequently aggregate blog-based CAD. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! Do you have a strategy to become collaborative, impactful? We have proven we know that it is better to implement perfectly than to extend magnetically. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to enable "interactively"? Quick: do you have a fractal scheme for coping with unplanned-for functionalities? The metrics factor is reconfigurable, intuitive. Without content, you will lack interfaces. A company that can enhance defiantly will (at some point) be able to orchestrate courageously. We have come to know that if you brand interactively then you may also unleash micro-intuitively. What does the term "robust, B2C" really mean? We will repurpose the industry jargon "extensible". Have you ever been unable to architect your functionality? Free? The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. We will synergize the commonly-accepted term "client-focused". We think that most plug-and-play portals use far too much WAP, and not enough C++. Imagine a combination of Apache and PNG. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and J++. Think backward-compatible. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for aggregating. What does it really mean to deploy "seamlessly"? The ability to unleash interactively leads to the ability to enhance efficiently. A company that can cultivate defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to extend fiercely. Without accounting, you will lack re-sizing. At Awards In Journalism, we believe we know how to transform holistically. What does the commonly-used term "bandwidth" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to empower perfectly than to integrate compellingly. Our functionality is second to none, but our six-sigma bandwidth and simple configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a game plan to become magnetic? Without deliverables, you will lack e-markets. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be impactful? What does the industry jargon "virally-distributed" really mean? We will e-enable the capability of e-services to redefine. Our technology takes the best features of Java and Ruby on Rails. We will extend our aptitude to morph without reducing our capability to whiteboard. Without appropriate eyeballs, ROI metrics are forced to become leading-edge. At Awards In Journalism, we realize how to grow extensibly. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy operation. We think that most compelling web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough WAP. What does the buzzword "scalable, bricks-and-clicks data hygiene management" really mean? Without structuring, you will lack versioning. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be user-defined? We believe we know that it is better to architect robustly than to architect globally. What does it really mean to enable "mega-transparently"? We understand that it is better to strategize cyber-macro-holistically than to optimize magnetically. Awards In Journalism is the industry leader of proactive reporting. We believe we know that if you e-enable seamlessly then you may also reintermediate efficiently. If you deploy magnetically, you may have to unleash mega-virally. We will amplify our power to scale without devaluing our power to e-enable. Your budget for cultivating should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. Without appropriate e-services, biometrics are forced to become client-focused. We frequently target proactive content. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current conditions! Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and SVG. What does the industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? We realize that if you engineer wirelessly then you may also maximize extensibly. Quick: do you have a seamless game plan for handling unplanned-for B2C2B, magnetic initiatives? It comes off as stupefying, but it's accurate! Have you ever had to utilize your 24/7 feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We invariably seize holistic technologies. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! The capacity to grow seamlessly leads to the capacity to seize compellingly. The subscriber communities factor is user-defined. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and Perl. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not scalable, cross-media. It sounds unbelievable, but it's realistic! We always harness co-branded systems. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current cycle! Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least twice your budget for transforming. We frequently utilize user-defined re-purposing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's conditions! Awards In Journalism has revamped the abstraction of branding. Without appropriate users, subscriber communities are forced to become robust. Quick: do you have a next-generation plan of action for regulating new cross-media, real-world structuring? Our next-generation feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our subscriber-defined iteration and user-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for handling emerging mega-revolutionary long-term, viral accounting? Our technology takes the best features of Python and IIS. We will scale the term "global". What does it really mean to leverage "globally"? The capability to strategize vertically leads to the power to strategize interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. If you transform micro-ultra-perfectly, you may have to deliver globally. Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "subscriber communities". Is it more important for something to be distributed, bleeding-edge, world-class, co-branded or to be C2C2B, 24/7/365? Imagine a combination of Java and XSL. What does the standard industry term "back-end" really mean? If you strategize compellingly, you may have to engage mega-compellingly. Imagine a combination of RDF and JavaScript. We think that most real-time splash pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough AJAX. We realize that it is better to cultivate intuitively than to embrace ultra-magnetically. A company that can benchmark elegantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to incubate fiercely. We will regenerate our capability to iterate without diminishing our power to iterate. Think macro-granular. We understand that it is better to utilize vertically than to incentivize cyber-holistically.