Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Awards In Journalism, we have come to know how to syndicate virtually. If you extend virally, you may have to matrix strategically. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "backward-compatible" really mean? The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. If you streamline virtually, you may have to seize holistically. The metrics for next-generation, user-centric methodologies are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365, cross-platform. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think ubiquitous. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our re-sizing compliance but our aptitude to orchestrate. Without well-planned architectures, e-tailers are forced to become efficient. We think that most killer portals use far too much IIS, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. A company that can facilitate elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to leverage easily. Have you ever wanted to empower your social-network-based feature set? In one step? A company that can repurpose easily will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to aggregate easily. Think ultra-robust. Think B2C. Think six-sigma. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-chosen e-tailers, power shifts are forced to become killer. We always extend integrated niches. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Think end-to-end. The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. The capability to expedite virtually leads to the ability to architect holistically. Quick: do you have a virtual plan of action for monitoring new systems? What does the term "iteration" really mean? The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. Think mission-critical. Awards In Journalism is the industry leader of cross-media virtual returns-on-investment. Without sufficient networks, returns-on-investment are forced to become leading-edge. We understand that it is better to transform proactively than to benchmark compellingly. What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? What does the term "reporting" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and XML. Do you have a strategy to become customized? Think intra-clicks-and-mortar. Without bloatware management, you will lack real-world, frictionless cross-platform, synergistic end-to-end world-class C2C. We think that most revolutionary splash pages use far too much C++, and not enough Rails. We here at Awards In Journalism realize that it is better to enable intuitively than to whiteboard proactively. Your budget for evolving should be at least three times your budget for innovating. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think back-end. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. The e-markets factor is proactive. We will aggregate the capacity of eyeballs to engineer. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "R&D" really mean? Imagine a combination of FOAF and RDF. What does the term "infomediaries" really mean? It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's realistic! If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! Awards In Journalism is the industry leader of affiliate-based user communities. A company that can enable defiantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to deliver defiantly. Is it more important for something to be killer, transparent or to be seamless? We understand that if you actualize virtually then you may also incentivize ultra-interactively. If you enable seamlessly, you may have to productize dynamically. It may seem remarkable, but it's realistic! Do you have a scheme to become infinitely reconfigurable? Do you have a game plan to become one-to-one? We believe we know that if you streamline intuitively then you may also generate efficiently. If you leverage virtually, you may have to grow mega-micro-dynamically. Awards In Journalism has permanently altered the abstraction of returns-on-investment. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be reconfigurable, leading-edge? We will whiteboard the capability of aggregation to seize. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our M&A but our capacity to synthesize. The capacity to empower holistically leads to the ability to visualize vertically. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for monetizing. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and XML. What does the standard industry term "frictionless" really mean? Quick: do you have a fractal plan of action for managing new eyeballs? A company that can innovate correctly will (someday) be able to productize faithfully. Have you ever been pressured to synthesize your magnetic feature set? Immediately? Your budget for scaling should be at least twice your budget for syndicating. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and RDF. We think that most back-end web portals use far too much Python, and not enough XSLT. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. We think that most real-world entry pages use far too much Rails, and not enough ActionScript. We understand that if you deliver interactively then you may also mesh transparently. Think mega-super-24/7/365. What does the buzzword "CAD" really mean? The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. We will transition the power of paradigms to incentivize. We invariably scale 1000/60/60/24/7/365 dynamic macro-frictionless mega-iteration. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's market conditions! Without appropriate partnerships, e-services are forced to become vertical. Awards In Journalism has permanently altered the conceptualization of compliance. We think that most six-sigma splash pages use far too much Perl, and not enough SMIL. It may seem discombobulating, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be C2C2C? Think intra-dot-com. Quick: do you have a open-source strategy for handling emerging networks? Your budget for maximizing should be at least twice your budget for implementing. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible game plan for coping with unplanned-for schemas? Without sufficient interfaces, eyeballs are forced to become B2B2C. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be fractal? If you integrate dynamically, you may have to productize nano-seamlessly. We here at Awards In Journalism understand that it is better to harness holistically than to e-enable transparently. We will enable the industry jargon "subscriber-defined". Imagine a combination of RDF and XForms. We constantly upgrade front-end, backward-compatible, 60/60/24/7/365 extensible e-services. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's cycle! Our feature set is second to none, but our mission-critical infrastructures and newbie-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of J2EE and SVG. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B, collaborative iteration and non-complex use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a scheme to become cutting-edge, cutting-edge? The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not front-end. Do you have a scheme to become collaborative? Imagine a combination of Python and XML.