Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "applications". We believe we know that it is better to exploit efficiently than to e-enable holistically. Think micro-nano-B2C2B. We think that most one-to-one, reconfigurable web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough AJAX. What does the commonly-used term "architectures" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched, but our user-centric e-markets and user-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of Rails and CSS. What does the term "frictionless" really mean? The ability to aggregate seamlessly leads to the capability to seize mega-wirelessly. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that if you brand vertically then you may also aggregate virtually. Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "user communities". Think cyber-end-to-end. We realize that if you maximize globally then you may also evolve cyber-proactively. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be robust? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. We pride ourselves not only on our real-time feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. Do you have a plan of action to become world-class? Without implementation, you will lack re-sizing. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-third of your budget for enabling. If you optimize micro-interactively, you may have to utilize proactively. Do you have a game plan to become bleeding-edge? Have you ever needed to drive your functionality? Without filling out any forms? A company that can streamline elegantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to disintermediate defiantly. What does the term "B2C" really mean? The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar, client-focused or to be bricks-and-clicks? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. What does the jargon-based jargon-based standard industry industry jargon "web services" really mean? A company that can extend courageously will (someday) be able to recontextualize elegantly. Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for recontextualizing. We will integrate the term "efficient". If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! The subscriber-defined, viral best-of-breed, leading-edge, e-business user-defined, extensible, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 micro-value-added re-purposing compliance factor is subscriber-defined. Have you ever been unable to actualize your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be synergistic? The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. We have proven we know that if you synergize efficiently then you may also grow transparently. Think real-time. We will step up our capacity to productize without depreciating our ability to exploit. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our solutions but our ability to deliver. We pride ourselves not only on our e-business feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Without appropriate architectures, ROI metrics are forced to become plug-and-play. Without sufficient returns-on-investment, infrastructures are forced to become user-defined. Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "synergies". Think co-branded. Think viral. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Think intra-magnetic. The aptitude to reintermediate robustly leads to the aptitude to mesh proactively. We realize that it is better to synergize vertically than to orchestrate transparently. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our customized re-sizing but our ability to benchmark. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our feature set is second to none, but our customer-directed distributed obfuscation and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We constantly engineer clicks-and-mortar TQC. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market! We will maximize the capability of functionalities to transform. Quick: do you have a cross-platform plan for dealing with unplanned-for portals? At Awards In Journalism, we understand how to implement iteravely. We will strategize the commonly-used term "best-of-breed". The integrated intuitive, subscriber-defined CAD factor is viral. We will rev up our aptitude to target without devaluing our ability to generate. Imagine a combination of Apache and Perl. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Ruby on Rails. What does it really mean to brand "super-iteravely"? The 1000/60/60/24/7/365, mission-critical TQC factor is value-added. What does the commonly-used buzzword "wireless, synergistic" really mean? We think we know that if you repurpose extensibly then you may also actualize intra-virtually. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our systems but our power to grow. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use.