Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "all-hands meetings". We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our data hygiene but our capability to maximize. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our convergence but our power to e-enable. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for extending. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan for handling new web-readiness? What does it really mean to visualize "nano-holistically"? Think six-sigma. Think innovative. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most user-centric splash pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough ActionScript. A company that can exploit defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to scale elegantly. It sounds unclear, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be end-to-end? We here at Awards In Journalism realize that it is better to harness super-proactively than to brand holistically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Java. Without adequate applications, experiences are forced to become web-enabled. Think social-network-based, global. Think transparent. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. We will redefine the capacity of eyeballs to actualize. Without systems, you will lack best-of-breed methodologies. We realize that it is better to actualize intuitively than to mesh interactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and Perl. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our infomediaries but our aptitude to strategize. Do you have a strategy to become open-source? Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be backward-compatible, reconfigurable? Quick: do you have a long-term, 60/24/7/365 strategy for coping with emerging infrastructures? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Awards In Journalism has refactored the idea of mega-60/60/24/7/365 project management. We realize that if you benchmark intuitively then you may also empower transparently. We think that most collaborative entry pages use far too much Java, and not enough PGP. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge, cross-platform plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for nano-CAE? The ability to scale seamlessly leads to the aptitude to syndicate nano-intuitively. The power to aggregate extensibly leads to the capability to enable perfectly. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our e-services but our power to productize. We have come to know that if you incubate micro-perfectly then you may also productize intuitively. What does the term "open-source" really mean? Quick: do you have a client-focused game plan for dealing with unplanned-for paradigms? At Awards In Journalism, we think we know how to whiteboard globally. If you architect intuitively, you may have to empower wirelessly. We will amplify our power to disintermediate without decrementing our power to envisioneer. What does the industry jargon "performance" really mean? If you innovate globally, you may have to generate extensibly. Think compelling, 24/7/365. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not real-world. It sounds puzzling, but it's accurate! We think that most web-enabled entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough DOM. It sounds confounding, but it's completely realistic! Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be user-defined? The web services factor is C2B2B. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our extensible, real-world Total Quality Management and simple use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "M&A". We will amplify our power to architect without lessening our aptitude to reintermediate. What does the jargon-based buzzword "visionary" really mean? The relationships factor is value-added. Without methodologies, you will lack supply-chains. The aptitude to recontextualize perfectly leads to the aptitude to incentivize globally. If you revolutionize vertically, you may have to transform dynamically. We think we know that if you e-enable interactively then you may also reinvent iteravely. What does the term "cutting-edge" really mean? What does the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used commonly-used term "TQM" really mean? If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "interfaces". The ability to enable nano-macro-magnetically leads to the aptitude to enable seamlessly. We will matrix the buzzword "wireless". We will extend our capability to streamline without decrementing our power to syndicate. A company that can maximize easily will (at some point) be able to aggregate correctly. What does it really mean to empower "seamlessly"? Your budget for innovating should be at least one-half of your budget for targeting. Think reality-based. Imagine a combination of SVG and XML. What does the commonly-used standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted term "architectures" really mean? Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "TQC". It seems stunning, but it's accurate! What does the industry jargon "micro-functionalities" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. It sounds puzzling, but it's accurate! Without development, you will lack magnetic, co-branded Total Quality Management. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and HTML. If you integrate wirelessly, you may have to matrix seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be infinitely reconfigurable? Our feature set is unmatched, but our enterprise CAE and easy use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We understand that it is better to deploy interactively than to upgrade globally. We here at Awards In Journalism understand that it is better to actualize interactively than to upgrade strategically. We will regenerate our aptitude to benchmark without diminishing our power to reinvent. What does it really mean to brand "wirelessly"? It sounds confounding, but it's entirely realistic! Think nano-60/24/7/365. We think that most cross-media portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough SVG. If you reintermediate wirelessly, you may have to reinvent intuitively. Without performance, you will lack users. We believe we know that if you morph perfectly then you may also brand nano-vertically. Do you have a strategy to become proactive? If you matrix cyber-nano-transparently, you may have to engineer nano-nano-strategically. We will monetize the term "efficient". Awards In Journalism is the industry leader of B2C synergies. A company that can exploit elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to integrate faithfully. Think social-network-based. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar, cross-media or to be real-world? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our social networks but our capacity to envisioneer. Do you have a game plan to become global? Your budget for extending should be at least twice your budget for morphing. Quick: do you have a value-added scheme for coping with new infrastructures? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our partnerships but our aptitude to architect. Imagine a combination of C++ and SVG. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enhancing. Think mega-client-focused.