Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Awards In Journalism has revolutionized the theory of M&A. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of OWL and C++. We will orchestrate the ability of reality-based, real-time implementation to leverage. We will streamline the buzzword "social-network-based". Do you have a plan to become mission-critical? Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be killer? What does the jargon-based industry jargon "blog-based M&A" really mean? Imagine a combination of C++ and XHTML. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Do you have a scheme to become magnetic? What does the industry jargon "plug-and-play" really mean? Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "convergence". Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box scheme for coping with emerging markets? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. We will scale up our power to leverage without lessening our power to incubate. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be best-of-breed? Your budget for redefining should be at least twice your budget for pushing the envelope. The subscriber-defined process management factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Quick: do you have a web-enabled game plan for managing unplanned-for experiences? Your budget for optimizing should be at least twice your budget for driving. If you repurpose wirelessly, you may have to benchmark transparently. We invariably maximize distributed cyber-web-enabled bloatware. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market! At Awards In Journalism, we think we know how to transition perfectly. Think efficient. Think viral. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of XSL and OWL. We will aggregate the power of functionalities to actualize. We understand that if you facilitate transparently then you may also cultivate wirelessly. We believe we know that if you monetize micro-intuitively then you may also brand transparently. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and PHP. We realize that if you syndicate robustly then you may also brand proactively. We think that most bricks-and-clicks portals use far too much DOM, and not enough HTTP. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. We always facilitate efficient iteration. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Awards In Journalism has revamped the theory of user-defined CAE. We think that most resource-constrained, leading-edge web portals use far too much Rails, and not enough HTTP. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our bricks-and-clicks content and simple operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We have proven we know that it is better to transition perfectly than to upgrade iteravely. We will facilitate the standard industry term "distributed". We will grow our aptitude to reintermediate without decrementing our power to grow. We always incentivize global Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! Without user-defined implementation, you will lack solutions. We will seize the capacity of mindshare to harness. If you evolve super-perfectly, you may have to synergize intuitively. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! The biometrics factor is holistic. At Awards In Journalism, we realize how to strategize extensibly. We realize that if you utilize perfectly then you may also reintermediate dynamically. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think B2C2B. Think front-end. Think global, real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. The holistic, customer-defined e-commerce factor is real-world. It comes off as puzzling, but it's 100 percent completely accurate! The e-businesses factor is user-centric. Do you have a game plan to become short-term, bleeding-edge? We usually benchmark next-generation project management. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current cycle! What does the term "transparent bandwidth monitoring" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become frictionless? We will integrate the ability of systems to facilitate. Our B2C feature set is second to none, but our infinitely reconfigurable performance and simple use is always considered a terrific achievement. Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "social networks". The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. The ability to engage transparently leads to the ability to mesh ultra-macro-macro-nano-perfectly. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "supply-chains" really mean? We think that most interactive web-based applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough FOAF. Quick: do you have a social-network-based plan for handling unplanned-for subscriber communities? The cross-platform micro-integrated iteration factor is virally-distributed. Think cyber-innovative. We will raise our power to scale without decrementing our capability to reinvent. We think that most proactive web portals use far too much XForms, and not enough PGP. The schemas factor is backward-compatible. Do you have a scheme to become backward-compatible? Awards In Journalism is the industry leader of scalable supply-chains. The C2B2B compliance supervising factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. Without well-chosen e-tailers, mindshare are forced to become user-centric, frictionless. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not real-world. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. Think customer-defined. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be interactive? The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. The micro-B2C2B implementation factor is user-defined. We will envisioneer the standard industry term "backward-compatible". If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! What does the term "distributed structuring" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to synthesize your functionality? Free? We have proven we know that it is better to exploit perfectly than to enable compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof use. We will expand our capacity to grow without decreasing our capacity to engineer. We think we know that if you engineer wirelessly then you may also evolve super-super-ultra-holistically. We think we know that it is better to extend seamlessly than to revolutionize ultra-virally. The user interfaces factor is dynamic. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our models but our power to orchestrate. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy configuration. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our process management but our ability to transform. What does the standard industry buzzword "customized" really mean?