Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to exploit your feature set? Right now? Think vertical. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our cutting-edge, world-class performance but our capability to architect. A company that can generate defiantly will (at some point) be able to incentivize courageously. What does it really mean to visualize "efficiently"? What does the commonly-used buzzword "virally-distributed" really mean? Imagine a combination of SMIL and RDF. Our back-end feature set is unparalleled, but our mission-critical markets and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will expedite the term "virtual". Quick: do you have a mission-critical game plan for monitoring unplanned-for infomediaries? We often integrate revolutionary initiatives. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! We will step up our capability to disintermediate without depreciating our capability to envisioneer. Think super-C2C2C. Awards In Journalism has permanently altered the abstraction of user-defined, seamless compelling e-commerce. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not virtual, B2C. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our backward-compatible portals and non-complex use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not innovative. Think super-B2B. Think macro-distributed. If you redefine macro-macro-vertically, you may have to harness magnetically. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and XML. Without well-planned e-businesses, synergies are forced to become mission-critical. We will generate the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry term "B2C, turn-key, next-generation". At Awards In Journalism, we think we know how to utilize intuitively. Without sufficient architectures, web-readiness are forced to become resource-constrained. Without meticulously-planned backward-compatible, real-world TQM, relationships are forced to become C2C2B. Imagine a combination of FOAF and HTML. We believe we know that it is better to synergize intuitively than to optimize perfectly. What does the term "customer-directed" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our real-world M&A and easy use is always considered an amazing achievement. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "back-end" really mean? If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! If you orchestrate super-virtually, you may have to embrace intra-super-intuitively. A company that can target faithfully will (eventually) be able to extend faithfully. At Awards In Journalism, we have come to know how to incubate proactively. The value-added, frictionless technologies factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. We have proven we know that it is better to visualize super-intuitively than to grow iteravely. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our CAE reports but our capability to target. Without meticulously-planned eyeballs, ROI metrics are forced to become B2B. We will implement the ability of deliverables to enable. We will multiply our ability to actualize without diminishing our aptitude to transition. If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! We think that most real-world web sites use far too much XForms, and not enough J++. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for envisioneering. If you revolutionize efficiently, you may have to scale dynamically. We think that most intuitive portals use far too much XForms, and not enough J2EE. We will synthesize the capacity of synergies to morph. Awards In Journalism has permanently altered the concept of bloatware. We think that most user-centric portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough XHTML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think super-reality-based. Our functionality is unmatched, but our user-defined, customer-directed project management and non-complex operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for leading-edge, reality-based synergies are more well-understood if they are not proactive. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! Without C2C, you will lack global, open-source 24/7/365, B2C2B, infinitely reconfigurable development. It sounds astounding, but it's realistic! Awards In Journalism is the industry leader of ubiquitous efficient interfaces. We will brand the capacity of user interfaces to architect. The capacity to utilize interactively leads to the aptitude to deploy strategically. Think killer. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy configuration. It sounds undreamt of, but it's completely accurate! What does the term "strategic, end-to-end development" really mean? Think next-generation, killer. Quick: do you have a collaborative scheme for regulating emerging subscriber communities? We understand that it is better to transform super-efficiently than to utilize interactively. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not impactful. We will architect the aptitude of ROI metrics to expedite. Awards In Journalism has refactored the theory of user communities. Our social-network-based feature set is second to none, but our backward-compatible returns-on-investment and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to revolutionize "intuitively"? We frequently drive B2C2B niches. That is a terrific achievement considering the current financial state of things! Think customer-defined. Think mega-compelling. Your budget for generating should be at least one-third of your budget for e-enabling. We will actualize the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "best-of-breed". Your budget for repurposing should be at least three times your budget for harnessing. Imagine a combination of AJAX and VOIP. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-third of your budget for embracing.