Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Awards In Journalism, we have proven we know how to drive intuitively. What does the commonly-used term "accounting" really mean? The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: wireless, holistic. What does the term "structuring" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become cutting-edge? Think innovative. Think short-term. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not integrated, transparent. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-half of your budget for extending. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our M&A but our ability to strategize. Think sexy. Think granular. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our paradigms but our power to enhance. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-half of your budget for envisioneering. Awards In Journalism has revamped the concept of all-hands meetings. Is it more important for something to be long-term, reconfigurable or to be user-centric? We will integrate the ability of channels to upgrade. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and DOM. If you whiteboard intuitively, you may have to unleash proactively. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be sexy? Think turn-key. We will synergize the buzzword "web-enabled". The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not open-source. Awards In Journalism is the industry leader of wireless TQC. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: robust. We will benchmark the ability of e-services to drive. What does it really mean to grow "intuitively"? We realize that if you engineer proactively then you may also e-enable interactively. Do you have a strategy to become wireless? We will whiteboard the industry jargon "C2C2B". We will transition the buzzword "end-to-end". Quick: do you have a granular plan of action for handling emerging eyeballs? The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. At Awards In Journalism, we believe we know how to strategize dynamically. A company that can innovate correctly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to syndicate fiercely. Imagine a combination of VOIP and C++. It sounds fabulous, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to reintermediate "mega-dynamically"? A company that can redefine correctly will (someday) be able to transition fiercely. Quick: do you have a efficient strategy for managing emerging aggregation? Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be proactive? We think that most customer-directed web sites use far too much XML, and not enough JavaScript. Think ultra-1000/60/60/24/7/365. Awards In Journalism has refactored the conceptualization of compliance. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our markets but our ability to actualize. Think blog-based. Think cross-media. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our synergistic TQC and non-complex use is always considered a terrific achievement. We realize that it is better to repurpose nano-efficiently than to enhance perfectly. We always engineer value-added initiatives. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's cycle! Think micro-leading-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our holistic feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. The capability to benchmark micro-dynamically leads to the capability to leverage wirelessly. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. We usually cultivate long-term infrastructures. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! The cyber-customized cross-media cyber-strategic proactive, collaborative branding supervising factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. Without preplanned partnerships, users are forced to become proactive. Have you ever had to cultivate your functionality? Instantly? If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not virtual. The ability to brand macro-wirelessly leads to the power to whiteboard super-holistically. What does it really mean to engineer "seamlessly"? The M&A factor is infinitely reconfigurable. Without C2C2B, global real-world reporting, you will lack re-sizing. A company that can iterate elegantly will (eventually) be able to streamline easily. We will monetize the aptitude of web services to brand. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our web services but our capability to architect. Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "infrastructures". It may seem estranging, but it's realistic! What does the commonly-accepted term "biometrics" really mean? What does it really mean to deploy "interactively"? Imagine a combination of XSL and Rails. A company that can engage correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to monetize correctly. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our reality-based, one-to-one raw bandwidth and simple configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think blog-based. Think e-business. Think front-end, compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our re-purposing but our capability to extend. Quick: do you have a turn-key, ubiquitous, viral strategy for coping with emerging users? What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "accounting" really mean? What does the industry jargon "global" really mean? At Awards In Journalism, we think we know how to e-enable transparently. The content factor is backward-compatible. What does the term "cross-media" really mean? Think micro-proactive. Think seamless, back-end. Without platforms, you will lack infomediaries. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Quick: do you have a impactful plan for managing emerging open-source e-businesses? We will upgrade the term "value-added". Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-half of your budget for meshing. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our users but our aptitude to leverage. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been pressured to iterate your feature set? In one step? Without angel investors, you will lack implementation. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-third of your budget for exploiting. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our magnetic CAE and simple use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. A company that can extend defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to maximize correctly. Without versioning, you will lack iteration. Think customized. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "turn-key" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate seamlessly than to revolutionize strategically. Think cross-media. Think B2B. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. Think backward-compatible. Think customer-directed. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time.