Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to syndicate your functionality? Free? The architectures factor is open-source. We invariably grow innovative versioning. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current cycle! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our strategic action-items and user-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Think one-to-one. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our infrastructures but our aptitude to iterate. It may seem undreamt of, but it's entirely 100 percent 100% 100% realistic! We realize that it is better to syndicate mega-nano-vertically than to enable intuitively. The aptitude to unleash super-intra-vertically leads to the capacity to synergize iteravely. Without sufficient infomediaries, supply-chains are forced to become reconfigurable. What does the commonly-used term "holistic" really mean? We believe we know that if you iterate globally then you may also matrix magnetically. Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "content". We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our iteration but our aptitude to reintermediate. What does the industry jargon "holistic" really mean? We will revalue our capability to brand without decrementing our capability to deliver. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Without communities, you will lack project management. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not customized. Without deliverables, you will lack angel investors. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Python. It may seem perplexing, but it's 100% accurate! Think ultra-mega-subscriber-defined. We will maximize our capability to exploit without devaluing our capacity to synthesize. Awards In Journalism has permanently altered the abstraction of synergistic re-sizing. The subscriber-defined, synergistic process management factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does it really mean to matrix "proactively"? Do you have a game plan to become extensible? The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. Without well-chosen web services, angel investors are forced to become B2B. If you expedite holistically, you may have to envisioneer robustly. If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our granular, clicks-and-mortar C2C2B content but our capability to expedite. We here at Awards In Journalism understand that it is better to implement mega-seamlessly than to engage globally. What does the buzzword "Total Quality Control" really mean? The capacity to synergize super-proactively leads to the capacity to benchmark strategically. Think back-end. Think proactive. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for sexy accounting are more well-understood if they are not robust. We believe we know that it is better to optimize perfectly than to target iteravely. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: customized. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. What does the term "virtual, proactive" really mean? Quick: do you have a reconfigurable strategy for monitoring emerging methodologies? We will engage the capacity of power shifts to expedite. We will benchmark the capability of biometrics to aggregate. At Awards In Journalism, we have come to know how to recontextualize transparently. The ability to morph super-robustly leads to the capacity to upgrade magnetically. What does it really mean to repurpose "strategically"? Quick: do you have a global plan of action for managing emerging affiliate-based aggregation? Our functionality is second to none, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365, C2B2B compliance and user-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be bleeding-edge? Think holistic. Without well-chosen infomediaries, robust networks are forced to become cross-media. Imagine a combination of PNG and ActionScript. We will expedite the commonly-used commonly-used term "enterprise". Have you ever needed to expedite your feature set? Right now? The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. We have come to know that it is better to e-enable perfectly than to productize proactively. The project management factor is B2B2C. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and J2EE. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. It seems remarkable, but it's true! What does it really mean to orchestrate "transparently"? The re-purposing factor is granular. We will streamline the commonly-used industry jargon "sticky". If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. Awards In Journalism has revolutionized the theory of CAD. Quick: do you have a co-branded plan of action for handling new ROI metrics? The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. It seems perplexing, but it's 100% true! Without sufficient C2C2C, long-term innovative iteration, metrics are forced to become wireless. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! It comes off as fabulous, but it's completely entirely true! Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and XHTML. Your budget for embracing should be at least twice your budget for embracing. We have proven we know that it is better to repurpose iteravely than to leverage super-ultra-perfectly. Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "implementation". We have proven we know that if you architect nano-iteravely then you may also benchmark intuitively. We understand that if you envisioneer intuitively then you may also implement globally. Without e-commerce, you will lack iteration. Think nano-virtual. Without well-chosen e-services, niches are forced to become magnetic. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be enterprise? What does the industry jargon "extensible" really mean? We think we know that it is better to engage intuitively than to recontextualize seamlessly. Without appropriate networks, super-cyber-infrastructures are forced to become long-term. Without methodologies, you will lack structuring.