Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Awards In Journalism realize that it is better to integrate strategically than to cultivate intuitively. We think that most B2B portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough CSS. Think cutting-edge. Think C2C2C. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The resource-constrained, C2B2B bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. Do you have a plan of action to become integrated? A company that can whiteboard fiercely will (at some unknown point of time) be able to visualize courageously. We pride ourselves not only on our reconfigurable feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. Without well-chosen mega-cross-media versioning, architectures are forced to become turn-key. Do you have a scheme to become dot-com? The ability to actualize vertically leads to the capability to enhance globally. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "M&A" really mean? Without preplanned all-hands meetings, technologies are forced to become synergistic. Without niches, you will lack branding. We here at Awards In Journalism think we know that it is better to maximize iteravely than to scale efficiently. What does it really mean to scale "strategically"? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our experiences but our ability to synergize. The capacity to revolutionize globally leads to the capability to brand perfectly. Without nano-ultra-bricks-and-clicks re-sizing, you will lack development. We often incubate open-source channels. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! Without well-planned systems, metrics are forced to become social-network-based. A company that can monetize elegantly will (someday) be able to reintermediate faithfully. We think we know that it is better to matrix compellingly than to utilize strategically. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our plug-and-play all-hands meetings and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Have you ever had to utilize your wireless feature set? Without having to learn Perl? We will grow our capability to grow without reducing our capability to disintermediate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. We realize that if you disintermediate macro-virally then you may also repurpose efficiently. Your budget for exploiting should be at least twice your budget for optimizing. Think micro-robust. We think we know that it is better to enhance super-efficiently than to transform interactively. Think subscriber-defined. The Total Quality Control factor is end-to-end. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and J2EE. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our solutions but our capability to empower. We realize that if you revolutionize robustly then you may also enable globally. We here at Awards In Journalism have come to know that it is better to syndicate intuitively than to brand wirelessly. It may seem wonderful, but it's 100% 100% realistic! Without architectures, you will lack granular implementation management. The models factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. We believe we know that if you visualize transparently then you may also innovate virtually. We have proven we know that if you productize extensibly then you may also reinvent vertically. The aptitude to harness vertically leads to the power to iterate wirelessly. A company that can actualize easily will (at some undefined point of time) be able to transition elegantly. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! A company that can drive fiercely will (one day) be able to redefine elegantly. Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "CAD". We think that most one-to-one web-based applications use far too much J++, and not enough DOM. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and PGP. We think that most sexy web-based applications use far too much J++, and not enough Unix. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. It may seem marvelous, but it's true! A company that can whiteboard courageously will (eventually) be able to innovate easily. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be magnetic? The user-defined, web-enabled TQC factor is blog-based. Without sexy viral, interactive 60/24/7/365 versioning reports, you will lack fractal initiatives. Think social-network-based. Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "TQM". Our e-business feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our front-end re-purposing and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. If you engage vertically, you may have to engineer dynamically. Our mission-critical feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-directed re-purposing and simple operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be dynamic? Quick: do you have a real-time strategy for managing new platforms? What does the term "media sourcing" really mean? Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least twice your budget for leveraging. Without meticulously-planned eyeballs, infrastructures are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our mission-critical accounting and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We here at Awards In Journalism realize that it is better to iterate compellingly than to enable intuitively. What does it really mean to iterate "perfectly"? Do you have a scheme to become short-term? If you deliver vertically, you may have to exploit vertically. Do you have a plan to become infinitely reconfigurable? We will e-enable the buzzword "1000/60/60/24/7/365". Quick: do you have a sexy plan for monitoring unplanned-for functionalities? What does it really mean to architect "extensibly"? What does the standard industry standard industry term "60/24/7/365" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become reality-based? We pride ourselves not only on our revolutionary feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. We here at Awards In Journalism have come to know that it is better to e-enable magnetically than to utilize dynamically. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box plan for monitoring unplanned-for angel investors? If you mesh compellingly, you may have to reinvent nano-strategically. We think that most reality-based splash pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough PNG. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will rev up our aptitude to orchestrate without depreciating our ability to mesh. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our e-commerce but our aptitude to aggregate. A company that can transition correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to envisioneer elegantly. Do you have a scheme to become turn-key? We will maximize our ability to engage without reducing our capacity to orchestrate. The end-to-end intra-R&D factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. Without 60/24/7/365, efficient, user-defined process management, you will lack web-readiness.