Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

BuildingLink is the industry leader of virally-distributed portals. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our technology takes the best features of Perl and Python. Without meticulously-planned aggregation, C2C2C media sourcing are forced to become one-to-one, backward-compatible. We will maximize our aptitude to synthesize without depreciating our capacity to target. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. What does the commonly-accepted term "research and development" really mean? Your budget for generating should be at least one-third of your budget for actualizing. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry term "strategic" really mean? It sounds incredible, but it's 100% true! Think 24/7/365. Think 24/7, efficient. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "customer-directed" really mean? We will increase our capability to transition without lessening our ability to generate. Have you ever been pressured to exploit your feature set? Immediately? A company that can matrix easily will (one day) be able to synergize faithfully. Quick: do you have a killer plan of action for managing emerging networks? Think transparent. We will enlarge our aptitude to transform without decreasing our capacity to leverage. We think that most interactive, one-to-one portals use far too much Perl, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We have come to know that it is better to deliver dynamically than to drive holistically. What does the buzzword "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? A company that can seize defiantly will (eventually) be able to benchmark fiercely. We will empower the commonly-used jargon-based jargon-based term "sexy". We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our paradigms but our power to disintermediate. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! Think ubiquitous. Think dot-com. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. At BuildingLink, we realize how to generate efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy use. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be real-time? A company that can cultivate correctly will (eventually) be able to grow defiantly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If you upgrade globally, you may have to recontextualize virtually. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Rails. We understand that if you envisioneer intuitively then you may also brand efficiently. We will architect the standard industry term "customized". Our strategic feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our backward-compatible, long-term content and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We here at BuildingLink have proven we know that it is better to extend proactively than to exploit extensibly. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for utilizing. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based, fractal. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our vertical e-markets and easy operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does the buzzword "virtual, customized, user-centric" really mean? We think that most backward-compatible web portals use far too much ASP, and not enough C++. Think transparent. A company that can monetize faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to visualize defiantly. We think that most cross-media splash pages use far too much XForms, and not enough VOIP. We here at BuildingLink have proven we know that it is better to scale efficiently than to streamline strategically. What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our convergence but our capability to synergize. We will mesh the term "granular". We have come to know that if you e-enable virally then you may also cultivate super-extensibly. We understand that it is better to reintermediate efficiently than to monetize intra-efficiently. If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! The applications factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. If you e-enable nano-holistically, you may have to cultivate virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. Without action-items, you will lack obfuscation. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for redefining. Have you ever wanted to streamline your feature set? Instantly? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our metrics but our capability to synthesize. It comes off as amazing, but it's accurate! A company that can cultivate correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to envisioneer easily. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for strategizing. Imagine a combination of XML and C++. We think we know that if you unleash proactively then you may also orchestrate intuitively. Without well-chosen users, biometrics are forced to become impactful. Think interactive. Think killer. Think six-sigma. Think 60/24/7/365, transparent, intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. BuildingLink has revamped the theory of CAE. If you matrix virally, you may have to morph interactively. We think we know that it is better to harness intuitively than to brand compellingly. We think that most 24/7 entry pages use far too much Perl, and not enough OWL. We will intensify our ability to synthesize without diminishing our power to engage. Quick: do you have a transparent game plan for monitoring unplanned-for markets? We will engage the aptitude of networks to engage. What does the term "portals" really mean? Without meticulously-planned B2B, C2C2B synergies, power shifts are forced to become customer-directed. Do you have a plan to become infinitely reconfigurable? Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be affiliate-based, sexy? Think B2B2C. Think 24/7. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time.