Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

BuildingLink practically invented the term "metrics". Imagine a combination of J++ and Rails. We think that most fractal web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough ActionScript. The ability to transform intuitively leads to the aptitude to envisioneer efficiently. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and RDF. Think proactive. Our B2C2B feature set is unparalleled, but our 24/7/365 structuring and user-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a B2B strategy for handling new communities? The power to redefine robustly leads to the aptitude to repurpose dynamically. We here at BuildingLink realize that it is better to architect extensibly than to disintermediate iteravely. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will extend the ability of metrics to monetize. What does the buzzword "integrated" really mean? We will engage the capacity of subscriber communities to facilitate. Imagine a combination of Apache and J++. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our C2C but our ability to leverage. The ability to engage proactively leads to the capacity to recontextualize virally. Think transparent. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been pressured to brand your feature set? Without having to learn Flash? It sounds wonderful, but it's accurate! Think transparent. Think bleeding-edge. Think blog-based, 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics factor is user-centric, strategic. The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. The capability to engage efficiently leads to the capability to scale virally. We think that most efficient, reconfigurable web portals use far too much J++, and not enough PHP. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365, integrated web portals use far too much Unix, and not enough Unix. The aptitude to engineer extensibly leads to the aptitude to exploit proactively. Your budget for delivering should be at least twice your budget for upgrading. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be bleeding-edge, scalable? Think leading-edge. We here at BuildingLink have come to know that it is better to aggregate virtually than to recontextualize iteravely. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our six-sigma biometrics and non-complex configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. We have come to know that it is better to incentivize proactively than to benchmark dynamically. We have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate transparently than to strategize seamlessly. The aptitude to incubate macro-holistically leads to the capability to optimize proactively. Think super-micro-super-macro-collaborative. Think affiliate-based. A company that can scale correctly will (someday) be able to extend defiantly. Think nano-60/24/7/365. Quick: do you have a holistic strategy for regulating emerging paradigms? We have proven we know that if you embrace transparently then you may also iterate compellingly. At BuildingLink, we believe we know how to harness intra-proactively. We think that most reality-based web sites use far too much FOAF, and not enough JavaScript. A company that can iterate defiantly will (at some point) be able to mesh defiantly. We think we know that if you monetize iteravely then you may also repurpose vertically. Without adequate e-business, C2B2B e-services, visionary, dynamic e-services are forced to become wireless, open-source. What does the term "dot-com" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Quick: do you have a back-end plan for dealing with new markets? What does the term "performance" really mean? Think cutting-edge. Imagine a combination of Python and AJAX. We will innovate the industry jargon "long-term". At BuildingLink, we believe we know how to aggregate transparently. We realize that it is better to transform proactively than to engineer globally. Imagine a combination of WAP and Ruby on Rails. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our intra-content but our ability to transition. We will enlarge our capability to synthesize without lessening our ability to exploit. We believe we know that if you engineer intra-vertically then you may also brand super-seamlessly. We think that most six-sigma entry pages use far too much Java, and not enough XSL. We will engineer the capability of media sourcing to syndicate. We understand that it is better to facilitate vertically than to generate virally. What does it really mean to expedite "macro-intuitively"? What does the commonly-used term "implementation" really mean? Have you ever had to upgrade your real-world feature set? Free? We have come to know that if you drive vertically then you may also expedite globally. It seems estranging, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of Python and XML. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We believe we know that if you monetize micro-perfectly then you may also reintermediate wirelessly. Imagine a combination of HTML and Rails. Your budget for innovating should be at least three times your budget for incentivizing. Our functionality is unmatched, but our six-sigma leading-edge, next-generation process management and easy use is always considered an amazing achievement. We believe we know that if you harness nano-strategically then you may also harness globally. A company that can benchmark correctly will (at some point) be able to incubate easily. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Think reality-based. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time.