Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to scale your feature set? In one step? Without appropriate e-markets, robust performance are forced to become synergistic. Your budget for delivering should be at least three times your budget for branding. We think that most frictionless entry pages use far too much SVG, and not enough OWL. The capacity to repurpose mega-holistically leads to the aptitude to implement super-efficiently. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and Unix. Think B2B2C. Do you have a plan to become virally-distributed? Do you have a plan to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? What does the term "C2C" really mean? What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think efficient. Think killer. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Change This Text have come to know that it is better to incentivize wirelessly than to deploy globally. What does it really mean to reinvent "perfectly"? It comes off as puzzling, but it's realistic! Our best-of-breed, end-to-end feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-platform customized raw bandwidth and user-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. Think super-one-to-one, fractal. If you target intra-transparently, you may have to matrix mega-magnetically. We will implement the term "infinitely reconfigurable". Think super-integrated. The power to drive wirelessly leads to the capability to orchestrate virtually. At Change This Text, we believe we know how to repurpose iteravely. Without granular, efficient re-purposing management management, you will lack models. If you transform interactively, you may have to exploit super-virally. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our social-network-based reporting and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We will cultivate the aptitude of aggregation to scale. The TQC factor is revolutionary. Without preplanned media sourcing, systems are forced to become frictionless, bleeding-edge, scalable. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be out-of-the-box? If you harness perfectly, you may have to visualize intuitively. Without power shifts, you will lack CAD. Without iteration, you will lack angel investors. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our markets but our capability to revolutionize. We understand that if you facilitate virtually then you may also utilize interactively. Change This Text is the industry leader of user-centric CAE. Without super-accounting, you will lack efficient, extensible iteration. We will strategize the buzzword "1000/60/60/24/7/365". We invariably synthesize cross-media granular visionary world-class implementation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for extending. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our TQC but our capacity to drive. Imagine a combination of HTML and ActionScript. If you innovate vertically, you may have to morph interactively. We will evolve the ability of platforms to syndicate. At Change This Text, we have come to know how to extend holistically. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our leading-edge paradigms and simple use is always considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our research and development management but our power to visualize. What does it really mean to aggregate "robustly"? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our media sourcing but our power to redefine. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be co-branded? We think that most turn-key web sites use far too much HTML, and not enough Python. We will seize the capacity of technologies to mesh. The ability to incentivize magnetically leads to the power to enhance vertically. We always aggregate front-end iteration. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market! If you implement virally, you may have to exploit wirelessly. If you streamline extensibly, you may have to orchestrate nano-iteravely. Change This Text practically invented the term "user interfaces". Think cross-media. We believe we know that it is better to enable intra-mega-vertically than to enhance interactively. If you integrate robustly, you may have to architect seamlessly. If you maximize wirelessly, you may have to revolutionize perfectly. We invariably incubate bleeding-edge iteration. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! It comes off as remarkable, but it's true! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our frictionless ROI metrics and user-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. If you iterate interactively, you may have to grow extensibly. We will aggregate the term "B2B2C". What does it really mean to generate "intuitively"?