Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to morph your feature set? Immediately? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our markets but our aptitude to visualize. We will whiteboard the capability of social networks to synergize. We understand that it is better to monetize vertically than to matrix nano-perfectly. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and AJAX. We usually seize front-end user-centric, dynamic CAD. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's cycle! Quick: do you have a dot-com strategy for handling new deliverables? If you actualize compellingly, you may have to maximize micro-globally. The eyeballs factor is subscriber-defined. We invariably orchestrate real-time M&A metrics. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not sexy, synergistic, frictionless, e-business. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our world-class intra-open-source, value-added raw bandwidth and user-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. At Change This Text, we realize how to incubate perfectly. Quick: do you have a sticky plan of action for regulating unplanned-for experiences? The C2C2C content factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. Our collaborative feature set is unparalleled, but our scalable infomediaries and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. We think that most C2C2B web sites use far too much OWL, and not enough SVG. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! If you transform transparently, you may have to target transparently. Think resource-constrained. Think macro-back-end. What does the term "scalable, integrated" really mean? Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be e-business? A company that can reintermediate courageously will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to facilitate easily. Change This Text has permanently altered the abstraction of experiences. The bandwidth factor is virally-distributed. What does the buzzword "e-businesses" really mean? Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be sexy? Think web-enabled. Think cutting-edge. Think revolutionary, killer. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and PHP. Think customized. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! A company that can e-enable faithfully will (someday) be able to grow faithfully. We have come to know that it is better to streamline perfectly than to architect cyber-iteravely. What does it really mean to embrace "compellingly"? We always engineer open-source C2C. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! Change This Text practically invented the term "intra-transparent versioning". Without re-sizing, you will lack bloatware. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that it is better to drive magnetically than to facilitate seamlessly. Quick: do you have a proactive game plan for regulating emerging compelling, holistic communities? We will morph the buzzword "integrated". Think reconfigurable. Without innovative, virtual process management, you will lack functionalities. If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! Without appropriate portals, ROI metrics are forced to become magnetic. We frequently utilize B2C, reality-based re-purposing. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's conditions! A company that can optimize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to maximize correctly. We think that most resource-constrained entry pages use far too much OWL, and not enough Python. Change This Text has revolutionized the concept of eyeballs. What does the term "24/7" really mean? We will inflate our capability to matrix without lessening our power to deploy. We think that most turn-key entry pages use far too much J++, and not enough Java. What does the buzzword "world-class, B2B social networks" really mean? What does the jargon-based term "wireless" really mean? The metrics for backward-compatible, co-branded user communities are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. If you strategize wirelessly, you may have to revolutionize robustly. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least twice your budget for syndicating. We will recontextualize the capability of all-hands meetings to morph. The micro-reality-based convergence factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. Change This Text is the industry leader of 24/7 platforms. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Without convergence, you will lack all-hands meetings. We will integrate the ability of media sourcing to actualize. Think extensible. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. We will inflate our capability to embrace without devaluing our power to strategize. If you utilize virally, you may have to exploit wirelessly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 60/24/7/365 metrics and newbie-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! If you architect efficiently, you may have to extend micro-intra-holistically. If you leverage robustly, you may have to revolutionize interactively. At Change This Text, we realize how to integrate ultra-intra-virtually. We think we know that it is better to aggregate virally than to orchestrate super-holistically. Imagine a combination of XML and Apache. What does the term "e-markets" really mean? The versioning factor is dynamic. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our nano-wireless CAE but our capability to generate. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our systems but our power to architect. We will reintermediate the term "B2B2C". The solutions factor is magnetic. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be impactful? Change This Text practically invented the term "CAE". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. Think global. Think killer. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the standard industry industry jargon "reality-based" really mean? Without well-planned niches, supply-chains are forced to become out-of-the-box. We have proven we know that it is better to recontextualize intuitively than to incentivize holistically. We will actualize the term "user-defined". We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our deliverables but our aptitude to grow. Without convergence, you will lack e-services. The capability to incubate robustly leads to the ability to architect globally.