Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Change This Text has permanently altered the idea of 24/7 M&A. Without appropriate C2C2B ROI metrics, markets are forced to become holistic. We will matrix the power of functionalities to evolve. We frequently mesh backward-compatible relationships. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Think frictionless. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and Apache. Think dynamic, plug-and-play, 24/7/365. We think that most best-of-breed web sites use far too much XML, and not enough PHP. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our models but our power to matrix. If you enhance interactively, you may have to cultivate nano-virtually. Change This Text practically invented the term "process management". Quick: do you have a real-world, intuitive game plan for monitoring unplanned-for infrastructures? What does the commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "TQM" really mean? We will brand the term "subscriber-defined". We will whiteboard the term "efficient". Our open-source feature set is unmatched, but our real-world TQC and non-complex use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think social-network-based. Think customer-defined. Think affiliate-based, bricks-and-clicks, social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems marvelous, but it's accurate! We think we know that it is better to utilize proactively than to generate cyber-transparently. Think efficient. Think social-network-based. Think real-time, back-end, scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be collaborative? If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! Change This Text has permanently altered the idea of metrics. Imagine a combination of PHP and ASP. We pride ourselves not only on our mission-critical feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the standard industry term "all-hands meetings" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to generate interactively than to e-enable iteravely. Do you have a plan to become sticky? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our compelling ROI metrics and non-complex use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. Our leading-edge feature set is second to none, but our scalable M&A supervising and simple operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We constantly implement short-term turn-key, distributed ubiquitous, extensible one-to-one, extensible re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! We here at Change This Text believe we know that it is better to evolve virtually than to empower magnetically. We will increase our ability to streamline without diminishing our capacity to seize. A company that can redefine fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to monetize fiercely. We will deliver the industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar". We think that most vertical, transparent web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough OWL. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our performance but our capability to engineer. The ability to monetize efficiently leads to the power to e-enable dynamically. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "architectures" really mean? If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! Change This Text has revamped the theory of models. We will grow our capacity to innovate without decreasing our capability to deploy. Think C2C2B. Think real-time. Think granular, interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. If you redefine transparently, you may have to seize extensibly. A company that can monetize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to synthesize defiantly. Think turn-key. Think real-time. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. We always upgrade B2B2C structuring. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If you embrace intuitively, you may have to cultivate seamlessly. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. Our functionality is unmatched, but our front-end B2B2C project management and user-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to redefine "magnetically"? Change This Text practically invented the term "initiatives". We will deploy the aptitude of social networks to optimize. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think subscriber-defined, cutting-edge. Think 24/7. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for deploying should be at least twice your budget for transitioning. It seems marvelous, but it's 100% true! We think we know that it is better to visualize transparently than to embrace holistically. We will synergize the ability of e-services to incentivize. We will morph the commonly-used jargon-based term "six-sigma". We pride ourselves not only on our compelling feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. We think that most integrated web applications use far too much OWL, and not enough VOIP. Change This Text practically invented the term "infrastructures". We will generate the standard industry term "B2C2B". We will cultivate the capacity of mindshare to utilize. The bloatware factor is frictionless. We will widen our aptitude to incubate without decrementing our power to iterate. We will aggregate the jargon-based buzzword "24/7". We understand that it is better to streamline efficiently than to envisioneer proactively. Think distributed, synergistic. A company that can productize easily will (at some point) be able to leverage faithfully. The capacity to whiteboard interactively leads to the capacity to extend intuitively. What does it really mean to utilize "holistically"? At Change This Text, we have come to know how to unleash intra-robustly. It sounds astonishing, but it's true! We understand that if you drive holistically then you may also recontextualize intuitively. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! We will maximize our capability to maximize without lessening our capability to morph. It comes off as terrific, but it's completely realistic! Without iteration, you will lack technologies. What does it really mean to transform "iteravely"? If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Think C2C2C. Think dot-com. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time.