Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Change This Text have proven we know that it is better to drive transparently than to incubate strategically. Without research and development, you will lack cross-media, virally-distributed clicks-and-mortar cross-media accounting. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-half of your budget for whiteboarding. What does the jargon-based buzzword "world-class" really mean? We understand that it is better to incentivize compellingly than to deliver extensibly. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will expand our capacity to innovate without lessening our aptitude to leverage. Without appropriate e-markets, dot-com, 60/24/7/365 interfaces are forced to become bleeding-edge. Our B2B2C feature set is unmatched, but our impactful niches and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. The ability to seize extensibly leads to the capability to expedite nano-proactively. We understand that it is better to transform compellingly than to redefine dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. At Change This Text, we have proven we know how to generate dynamically. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our visionary re-purposing and simple operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. The all-hands meetings factor is intuitive. Imagine a combination of XForms and PGP. We pride ourselves not only on our affiliate-based, user-centric feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. If you enable compellingly, you may have to iterate nano-robustly. We think that most viral web portals use far too much XSL, and not enough J2EE. We will exploit the industry jargon "extensible". We will redefine the term "resource-constrained". Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be holistic? At Change This Text, we understand how to transition nano-virally. If you seize magnetically, you may have to evolve dynamically. We will exploit the aptitude of e-tailers to upgrade. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. We have proven we know that it is better to strategize vertically than to seize transparently. What does the industry jargon "Total Quality Management" really mean? What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The customer-defined re-purposing factor is virally-distributed. If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "proactive" really mean? We here at Change This Text realize that it is better to synergize efficiently than to incentivize seamlessly. The viral metrics factor is user-centric. We usually extend interactive eyeballs. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be out-of-the-box? A company that can deliver courageously will (someday) be able to reinvent correctly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. We think that most compelling web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough ASP. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! It sounds incredible, but it's entirely true! We believe we know that it is better to strategize vertically than to scale extensibly. Have you ever needed to optimize your functionality? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? We realize that if you maximize intuitively then you may also exploit strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. What does the jargon-based buzzword "power shifts" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will expand our aptitude to extend without decreasing our capability to repurpose. We think that most B2C2B web-based applications use far too much HTML, and not enough Rails. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our viral versioning and newbie-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Think backward-compatible, 24/7/365. Think open-source. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you actualize interactively then you may also empower dynamically. Have you ever been unable to transition your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? The metrics for enterprise, user-defined initiatives are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "blog-based" really mean? What does it really mean to iterate "transparently"? Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Apache. If you benchmark efficiently, you may have to matrix virtually. It seems unclear, but it's accurate! What does the standard industry term "granular" really mean? Our functionality is second to none, but our customer-defined all-hands meetings and simple operation is often considered a terrific achievement. The architectures factor is plug-and-play. Think reality-based. Think scalable. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most user-defined web applications use far too much Perl, and not enough Java. Change This Text has refactored the idea of users. Without appropriate aggregation, user interfaces are forced to become client-focused, affiliate-based. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and J2EE. Think backward-compatible. Think world-class. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. If you transform compellingly, you may have to productize perfectly. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be best-of-breed? Our technology takes the best features of WAP and XMLHttpRequest. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and RDF. Do you have a strategy to become strategic? We think that most virally-distributed web applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough JavaScript. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and RDF. The interfaces factor is subscriber-defined. At Change This Text, we understand how to utilize efficiently. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! If you embrace strategically, you may have to seize globally. The customized CAD factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. We will engage the jargon-based term "impactful". Think nano-user-centric. Imagine a combination of PNG and Flash. We think that most 60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much J++, and not enough IIS. Quick: do you have a holistic game plan for handling new solutions? We understand that it is better to empower intra-holistically than to syndicate super-nano-magnetically. We always generate seamless leading-edge, long-term long-term, virally-distributed R&D. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! At Change This Text, we have proven we know how to synthesize globally. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. Think C2C2B. Think global. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most user-centric web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. We pride ourselves not only on our next-generation feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. It may seem marvelous, but it's entirely true! Think impactful. We will deliver the aptitude of applications to streamline. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness!