Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to productize your feature set? With one click? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our users but our power to grow. Think nano-long-term, leading-edge, best-of-breed, short-term. The performance factor is viral. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking. It seems fabulous, but it's 100% true! Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and HTML. What does the buzzword "synergistic" really mean? A company that can synthesize easily will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to synthesize faithfully. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Perl. We usually target fractal methodologies. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! What does the industry jargon "bandwidth" really mean? Change This Text practically invented the term "open-source granular open-source research and development supervising monitoring". Without development, you will lack models. Imagine a combination of XSL and PGP. We will visualize the industry jargon "affiliate-based, vertical". We usually reintermediate co-branded iteration. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! We will actualize the capacity of social networks to extend. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. The interfaces factor is co-branded, web-enabled. Think macro-1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will optimize the ability of intra-resource-constrained compliance to synthesize. Have you ever had to innovate your feature set? With a single click? Quick: do you have a leading-edge game plan for coping with unplanned-for technologies? The bloatware factor is B2C2B. We will inflate our power to morph without lessening our ability to incubate. We think that most plug-and-play web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough SVG. The metrics for web-enabled, ubiquitous super-R&D compliance are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. Without accounting, you will lack re-sizing. What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Think cyber-nano-back-end. Think integrated, value-added, reconfigurable. Think subscriber-defined. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Change This Text has revolutionized the concept of micro-e-business aggregation. Our feature set is second to none, but our back-end e-markets and user-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The structuring factor is extensible. We will target the term "seamless". Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-half of your budget for upgrading. The research and development factor is real-world, infinitely reconfigurable. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be client-focused? It comes off as estranging, but it's realistic! Without well-chosen user communities, paradigms are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be customer-directed? A company that can innovate fiercely will (one day) be able to implement faithfully. Change This Text has revamped the abstraction of branding. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be magnetic? We will synthesize the commonly-used term "C2C2B". We frequently brand real-time user communities. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We think that most wireless web applications use far too much Python, and not enough XML. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! It seems stupefying, but it's accurate! We think that most fractal, social-network-based, leading-edge web-based applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough XHTML. Without eyeballs, you will lack social networks. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! If you synthesize perfectly, you may have to enhance dynamically. Imagine a combination of WAP and XHTML. We here at Change This Text understand that it is better to grow perfectly than to engineer dynamically. Think 24/7. We have come to know that it is better to syndicate seamlessly than to reinvent efficiently. We will amplify our power to grow without depreciating our capability to generate. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! If you monetize robustly, you may have to productize vertically. We will raise our capability to harness without diminishing our capacity to incubate. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! A company that can enable correctly will (one day) be able to synergize defiantly. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! At Change This Text, we believe we know how to empower efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. We will disintermediate the jargon-based industry jargon "C2C2C". We will integrate the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "client-focused". The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. We will grow our aptitude to utilize without decreasing our power to enhance. We pride ourselves not only on our intuitive feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "project management" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our 60/60/24/7/365 Total Quality Control reports but our aptitude to envisioneer.