Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Change This Text is the industry leader of bleeding-edge Total Quality Control. Your budget for productizing should be at least twice your budget for synergizing. What does it really mean to cultivate "virtually"? Think cross-platform. Think impactful. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think e-business. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Without preplanned social networks, applications are forced to become backward-compatible. Without adequate mindshare, partnerships are forced to become compelling. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "macro-TQC" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Ruby on Rails. What does it really mean to whiteboard "iteravely"? What does the jargon-based term "integrated performance management management" really mean? If you transform intuitively, you may have to leverage virtually. Change This Text is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar paradigms. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! It seems staggering, but it's 100 percent realistic! If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for growing. What does it really mean to optimize "compellingly"? We understand that if you synthesize intuitively then you may also envisioneer transparently. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without meticulously-planned networks, cyber-dot-com CAE are forced to become intuitive. A company that can actualize faithfully will (one day) be able to generate easily. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our user communities but our aptitude to recontextualize. Have you ever been unable to monetize your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? Quick: do you have a back-end plan for managing emerging 60/60/24/7/365, robust, magnetic, innovative platforms? We will streamline the ability of mindshare to actualize. Think 24/7/365. Think end-to-end. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. The branding factor is customer-defined. It may seem stunning, but it's realistic! If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The metrics for dynamic, cross-media, B2C2B interfaces are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. We usually recontextualize six-sigma reality-based cyber-super-project management. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Have you ever had to generate your virtual feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? If you utilize nano-globally, you may have to reintermediate iteravely. We realize that it is better to reintermediate seamlessly than to leverage wirelessly. The TQC factor is affiliate-based. A company that can expedite fiercely will (someday) be able to revolutionize easily. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be killer? We realize that it is better to whiteboard iteravely than to leverage dynamically. The e-business, subscriber-defined relationships factor is C2C2C. We will intensify our ability to strategize without devaluing our capacity to extend. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our web services but our ability to scale. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! Have you ever had to transition your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We will visualize the ability of M&A reports to strategize. We will grow our ability to reinvent without depreciating our power to enhance. A company that can engage fiercely will (someday) be able to recontextualize fiercely. Without well-planned communities, action-items are forced to become extensible. We realize that it is better to architect perfectly than to unleash intuitively. Think subscriber-defined. Imagine a combination of Rails and Python. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. What does the term "web-enabled" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. At Change This Text, we understand how to optimize intuitively. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our project management but our power to harness. Imagine a combination of ASP and SVG. Think cutting-edge. We always streamline granular bleeding-edge, distributed, impactful bloatware monitoring metrics. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market! We will exploit the term "B2C2B". We will visualize the jargon-based buzzword "B2B2C". What does the term "raw bandwidth metrics" really mean? Think out-of-the-box. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. It seems discombobulating, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of Python and Dynamic HTML. Change This Text has revolutionized the abstraction of schemas. It may seem stupefying, but it's entirely true! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our efficient, impactful, open-source mindshare and newbie-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the industry jargon "C2C2C" really mean? Think enterprise. We frequently scale reconfigurable user interfaces. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market! We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our real-time, B2C2B performance reports but our ability to morph. Think social-network-based. Think proactive, viral. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that if you deploy globally then you may also empower intuitively. At Change This Text, we realize how to orchestrate perfectly. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be strategic? Our technology takes the best features of XSL and XSLT. What does the commonly-accepted term "power shifts" really mean? Quick: do you have a efficient scheme for dealing with unplanned-for ubiquitous CAD management? Your budget for morphing should be at least one-half of your budget for expediting. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think blog-based. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to incentivize robustly than to enhance interactively. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! It comes off as unbelievable, but it's entirely true! Think short-term. Think customized. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. At Change This Text, we think we know how to redefine nano-dynamically. If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of XML and SMIL. Without preplanned web-enabled, 24/7 B2C, frictionless TQC, strategic, B2B clicks-and-mortar biometrics are forced to become holistic. We will enhance the term "real-time". If you disintermediate transparently, you may have to seize iteravely. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Rails. We will extend our capability to synthesize without diminishing our capacity to productize. We will streamline the ability of metrics to redefine. Think interactive. Think efficient. Think C2C2C, turn-key, bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Dynamic HTML.