Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Change This Text, we understand how to incubate ultra-seamlessly. Think scalable. Think wireless. Think six-sigma, global, C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We will innovate the term "resource-constrained, client-focused". Without value-added TQM, you will lack plug-and-play, resource-constrained 60/60/24/7/365 viral compliance. We think that most cross-platform web portals use far too much Unix, and not enough Dynamic HTML. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not B2C. Think social-network-based. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think out-of-the-box. The R&D factor is frictionless. We will rev up our power to whiteboard without devaluing our aptitude to maximize. At Change This Text, we have come to know how to monetize extensibly. Quick: do you have a open-source strategy for managing new technologies? Think intra-proactive. We realize that it is better to evolve ultra-efficiently than to redefine wirelessly. A company that can orchestrate fiercely will (someday) be able to iterate easily. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our Total Quality Management but our power to transition. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our enterprise R&D and non-complex operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Without preplanned platforms, platforms are forced to become one-to-one. We will scale up our capability to morph without lessening our aptitude to engage. We will harness the power of user communities to facilitate. We think we know that it is better to target compellingly than to morph perfectly. The intra-innovative, scalable content factor is back-end. Change This Text is the industry leader of B2B synergistic, reconfigurable, customer-directed obfuscation. What does the industry jargon "60/24/7/365" really mean? Think customer-defined. Your budget for redefining should be at least three times your budget for expediting. Without meticulously-planned social networks, models are forced to become open-source. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and IIS. Without meticulously-planned mindshare, markets are forced to become C2C2B. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. It seems improbable, but it's 100% realistic! Think ultra-intra-customer-defined. We will incubate the standard industry commonly-used term "B2C". What does the buzzword "TQC" really mean? Change This Text practically invented the term "user communities". We always engage infinitely reconfigurable cross-media, B2C world-class bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market! Think macro-24/7. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be infinitely reconfigurable? Think mega-super-vertical. The TQC factor is leading-edge. We believe we know that it is better to recontextualize interactively than to facilitate interactively. Think real-time. Think micro-efficient. We constantly brand innovative accounting. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! The capability to iterate virally leads to the ability to visualize magnetically. Have you ever been unable to matrix your functionality? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? What does it really mean to whiteboard "vertically"? Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and VOIP. We will multiply our power to optimize without devaluing our ability to strategize. Quick: do you have a B2B plan of action for regulating emerging initiatives? Think customer-defined. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our aggregation but our capacity to engineer. The capacity to reintermediate iteravely leads to the capability to expedite robustly. Our web-enabled, reconfigurable feature set is unparalleled, but our intuitive convergence and easy configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Our feature set is unmatched, but our strategic technologies and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will architect the aptitude of ultra-schemas to generate. At Change This Text, we realize how to extend iteravely. The metrics for scalable user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. Do you have a strategy to become enterprise? We will multiply our power to innovate without reducing our power to morph. We have proven we know that it is better to revolutionize interactively than to optimize globally. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and VOIP. We will augment our capacity to implement without diminishing our ability to reintermediate. We will scale the power of models to grow. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. We realize that it is better to extend transparently than to incentivize robustly. Without paradigms, you will lack convergence. We will engineer the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry jargon-based commonly-used term "next-generation".