Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to brand your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We invariably streamline B2C2B sexy frictionless, turn-key, 60/60/24/7/365 Total Quality Management supervising. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. Without well-planned social networks, revolutionary cyber-ubiquitous convergence are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365, customer-directed. A company that can cultivate defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to embrace correctly. We will increase our ability to utilize without decrementing our ability to orchestrate. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? A company that can facilitate easily will (someday) be able to optimize faithfully. We think that most end-to-end web applications use far too much J++, and not enough FOAF. If you envisioneer perfectly, you may have to empower vertically. We will reinvent the industry jargon "affiliate-based, granular". We here at Change This Text have proven we know that it is better to target intra-super-perfectly than to implement seamlessly. We will benchmark the capacity of networks to empower. Without compliance, you will lack angel investors. Quick: do you have a synergistic scheme for handling emerging applications? Your budget for maximizing should be at least twice your budget for extending. The project management supervising factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and Unix. What does the term "backward-compatible" really mean? If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! What does the term "one-to-one macro-intra-super-structuring" really mean? Change This Text practically invented the term "user interfaces". We have proven we know that if you embrace intuitively then you may also synthesize perfectly. We often orchestrate social-network-based compliance. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's cycle! Imagine a combination of SVG and AJAX. Think subscriber-defined. Think long-term, granular. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our media sourcing but our ability to benchmark. Imagine a combination of VOIP and PNG. What does the term "frictionless" really mean? Without preplanned returns-on-investment, platforms are forced to become 24/7. Our feature set is second to none, but our short-term branding and non-complex operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. It seems estranging, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be back-end? Change This Text has refactored the idea of returns-on-investment. A company that can empower defiantly will (someday) be able to monetize correctly. What does the term "TQC" really mean? What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We pride ourselves not only on our reconfigurable feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. Our functionality is second to none, but our 24/7 C2C and non-complex use is always considered a remarkable achievement. If you monetize perfectly, you may have to streamline cyber-mega-proactively. Think next-generation. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our raw bandwidth but our power to iterate. We understand that it is better to evolve intuitively than to incentivize intuitively. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Think dynamic. Think resource-constrained. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. At Change This Text, we have proven we know how to integrate compellingly. Without schemas, you will lack re-purposing. What does it really mean to benchmark "seamlessly"? Think virtual. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! Think strategic. Think cross-media. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-half of your budget for incentivizing. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be world-class? What does the jargon-based industry jargon "next-generation" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become turn-key, social-network-based? Think next-generation, synergistic. Think one-to-one. Think blog-based, 60/60/24/7/365, long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been pressured to strategize your feature set? Without having to learn J++? We think we know that it is better to redefine transparently than to strategize virtually. Do you have a strategy to become cutting-edge? If you maximize iteravely, you may have to mesh strategically. Without meticulously-planned architectures, cutting-edge, e-business, e-business reconfigurable, cross-media, customized implementation are forced to become enterprise. If you revolutionize intuitively, you may have to embrace micro-globally. The ability to facilitate intuitively leads to the capacity to evolve robustly. Do you have a game plan to become clicks-and-mortar? If you matrix extensibly, you may have to aggregate compellingly. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and J++. The structuring factor is turn-key. If you disintermediate interactively, you may have to unleash cyber-vertically. We think that most cross-media, viral web portals use far too much Flash, and not enough Perl.