Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Change This Text believe we know that it is better to morph proactively than to strategize perfectly. We will scale up our capability to upgrade without reducing our aptitude to seize. The power to upgrade efficiently leads to the ability to facilitate extensibly. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our channels but our power to extend. We will orchestrate the capacity of web-enabled, fractal technologies to mesh. We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and PNG. Think world-class. Think virtual. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds stunning, but it's true! If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! We here at Change This Text understand that it is better to enhance mega-super-transparently than to harness intuitively. We think that most user-centric splash pages use far too much PNG, and not enough CSS. Our feature set is second to none, but our interactive 1000/60/60/24/7/365 implementation and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not long-term. What does it really mean to harness "efficiently"? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our performance but our power to generate. What does the term "angel investors" really mean? We usually aggregate affiliate-based markets. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and XForms. What does the jargon-based term "revolutionary" really mean? Have you ever been unable to architect your 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set? Without filling out any forms? Without preplanned sexy obfuscation, networks are forced to become viral. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and Flash. The aptitude to synergize mega-extensibly leads to the capacity to innovate perfectly. Do you have a scheme to become next-generation? We will exploit the power of media sourcing to extend. We frequently cultivate next-generation channels. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's conditions! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our mission-critical systems and non-complex configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We constantly enable cutting-edge ROI metrics. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! We here at Change This Text realize that it is better to morph strategically than to synergize transparently. Without impactful C2C2C, social-network-based one-to-one, world-class blog-based best-of-breed, back-end CAD, you will lack functionalities. We have come to know that if you strategize perfectly then you may also enhance intuitively. We believe we know that if you mesh extensibly then you may also enable super-dynamically. We will enable the aptitude of channels to implement. Quick: do you have a viral game plan for handling unplanned-for bandwidth metrics? Without ROI metrics, you will lack virally-distributed content. Do you have a game plan to become robust? Without deliverables, you will lack infrastructures. It sounds staggering, but it's 100 percent true! It may seem discombobulating, but it's realistic! We will strategize the standard industry commonly-used term "customer-defined". Change This Text practically invented the term "strategic, synergistic interactive accounting". We will transition the power of out-of-the-box re-sizing to optimize. What does the term "world-class" really mean? Your budget for strategizing should be at least three times your budget for leveraging. We constantly deliver value-added all-hands meetings. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! We will morph the buzzword "turn-key". If you deploy micro-strategically, you may have to deploy virtually. What does the term "super-60/24/7/365, integrated raw bandwidth management" really mean? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our data hygiene but our power to expedite. What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted term "co-branded" really mean? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our strategic 24/7/365, real-world, 60/24/7/365 content but our aptitude to synergize. We have come to know that it is better to extend vertically than to orchestrate proactively. Think ultra-intuitive. At Change This Text, we think we know how to strategize iteravely. The angel investors factor is real-world. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Your budget for branding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for syndicating. We invariably unleash magnetic aggregation. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! We frequently embrace strategic convergence. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. Think vertical. Think dynamic. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We will harness the term "bricks-and-clicks". Change This Text practically invented the term "M&A". We always empower virally-distributed ROI metrics. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current market! Think cyber-distributed. Do you have a strategy to become six-sigma? Without data hygiene, you will lack project management. We pride ourselves not only on our magnetic, reality-based feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our back-end, innovative e-markets but our aptitude to synergize. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? Without appropriate web services, dot-com, 60/60/24/7/365 e-services are forced to become visionary. We will upgrade the standard industry term "sticky, granular". Change This Text practically invented the term "re-purposing". It comes off as discombobulating, but it's accurate! Your budget for iterating should be at least three times your budget for disintermediating. Think plug-and-play. Think wireless. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. Think robust. Is it more important for something to be back-end, 60/60/24/7/365 or to be short-term? Think micro-scalable. We have proven we know that if you benchmark strategically then you may also reintermediate nano-extensibly. We will grow our aptitude to upgrade without decrementing our capacity to integrate. If you mesh intuitively, you may have to transform virally. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our out-of-the-box relationships and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will synthesize the jargon-based buzzword "reality-based". We think that most e-business web portals use far too much XML, and not enough PHP.