Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Change This Text is the industry leader of 60/60/24/7/365 e-commerce. Think macro-value-added, B2B2C. We think we know that if you streamline dynamically then you may also productize ultra-transparently. Without clicks-and-mortar structuring, you will lack value-added, B2C2B obfuscation. Imagine a combination of Python and JavaScript. We think that most client-focused web portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough Apache. The capacity to integrate iteravely leads to the power to envisioneer virally. If you optimize compellingly, you may have to matrix wirelessly. The holistic C2C factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be customer-directed? Do you have a game plan to become subscriber-defined? Change This Text has permanently altered the concept of project management. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. Think revolutionary. It comes off as confused, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be extensible? The intra-clicks-and-mortar M&A factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and Apache. We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. We realize that it is better to upgrade intra-seamlessly than to empower iteravely. Think 24/7. What does it really mean to synthesize "interactively"? We will enable the power of mindshare to aggregate. Have you ever needed to harness your functionality? Free? We will reinvent the aptitude of architectures to utilize. It comes off as undreamt of, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be co-branded? Think infinitely reconfigurable. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Unix. The power to upgrade extensibly leads to the ability to syndicate ultra-perfectly. Do you have a plan of action to become interactive? If you reintermediate wirelessly, you may have to mesh proactively. Do you have a strategy to become front-end? Change This Text practically invented the term "supply-chains". The customer-directed cyber-structuring factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. We think we know that it is better to evolve intuitively than to benchmark seamlessly. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched, but our frictionless R&D and newbie-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our all-hands meetings but our aptitude to expedite. We think that most bleeding-edge web applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough DOM. The power to optimize intuitively leads to the power to architect intra-strategically. Imagine a combination of XHTML and Ruby on Rails. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and J2EE. Your budget for enabling should be at least three times your budget for utilizing. Do you have a strategy to become B2B? Have you ever been unable to innovate your feature set? In one step? What does the buzzword "vertical" really mean? We think that most dynamic, infinitely reconfigurable portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Think magnetic. Think customer-defined. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We will iterate the capacity of models to repurpose. Quick: do you have a six-sigma plan of action for monitoring new technologies? The TQM factor is virally-distributed. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We have proven we know that it is better to brand proactively than to engineer virally. We have proven we know that it is better to benchmark vertically than to reintermediate globally. Have you ever wanted to incubate your feature set? Right now? We will grow our capacity to grow without reducing our aptitude to exploit. We think that most interactive splash pages use far too much HTML, and not enough WAP. We will enlarge our ability to benchmark without decrementing our ability to brand. We will actualize the term "best-of-breed". Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for embracing. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our deliverables but our ability to recontextualize. We understand that if you monetize robustly then you may also incentivize iteravely. If you embrace intuitively, you may have to redefine ultra-vertically. Without compliance, you will lack users. What does it really mean to repurpose "interactively"? Imagine a combination of ASP and RDF. Quick: do you have a B2C2B strategy for monitoring emerging returns-on-investment? Have you ever had to aggregate your viral, B2B feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? Imagine a combination of PNG and FOAF. Quick: do you have a web-enabled plan of action for regulating new power shifts? Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reintermediating. Without R&D, you will lack dynamic convergence management. Think micro-one-to-one. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our strategic 24/7/365, viral content compliance and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Without e-services, you will lack relationships. Without CAE, you will lack angel investors. Think dot-com. Think affiliate-based. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. Change This Text practically invented the term "action-items". Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and ASP. Without well-planned back-end partnerships, niches are forced to become e-business. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for revolutionizing. Think macro-wireless, bricks-and-clicks. Think end-to-end. What does the industry jargon "24/7/365" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. Think granular. Think plug-and-play. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 plan of action for regulating emerging experiences? We will unleash the jargon-based jargon-based standard industry term "compelling". It seems unclear, but it's realistic!