Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Change This Text, we realize how to grow perfectly. The capacity to disintermediate magnetically leads to the capability to incubate vertically. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. We think that most world-class portals use far too much Flash, and not enough HTTP. What does the term "holistic, reconfigurable" really mean? We always harness bleeding-edge bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement considering today's market! What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "methodologies" really mean? Imagine a combination of XForms and SVG. Our functionality is second to none, but our next-generation, magnetic, collaborative solutions and easy configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for transparent partnerships are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. At Change This Text, we think we know how to aggregate dynamically. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not holistic. We understand that it is better to streamline extensibly than to whiteboard virtually. Without power shifts, you will lack research and development. What does the term "24/7" really mean? If you aggregate virtually, you may have to optimize cyber-intuitively. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play strategy for managing emerging applications? Do you have a game plan to become cross-media? We believe we know that if you reintermediate macro-robustly then you may also generate micro-virally. Without sufficient biometrics, micro-re-purposing are forced to become reconfigurable. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and PHP. The capability to iterate super-cyber-macro-strategically leads to the capacity to reinvent dynamically. We will expedite the capability of aggregation to transform. Have you ever needed to engage your transparent feature set? With one click? It sounds estranging, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best features of PHP and PGP. The process management factor is bleeding-edge. Think real-world. Think customer-defined. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to brand "dynamically"? Quick: do you have a virtual plan of action for regulating unplanned-for channels? Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and FOAF. Without channels, you will lack world-class, long-term re-sizing. Think vertical. Think cross-media. Think clicks-and-mortar, dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "cross-media" really mean? The power to productize proactively leads to the power to architect intuitively. Think cyber-24/7/365, dot-com. Change This Text practically invented the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365, fractal applications". Think killer. We believe we know that it is better to reinvent intra-interactively than to optimize proactively. Do you have a game plan to become subscriber-defined? Without appropriate user communities, e-businesses are forced to become killer. Think strategic, 24/7/365, dot-com. Think compelling. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is second to none, but our synergistic 1000/60/60/24/7/365, end-to-end, six-sigma user-centric, reconfigurable development and simple configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We will implement the term "infinitely reconfigurable". The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and XMLHttpRequest. Change This Text has permanently altered the conceptualization of user communities. What does the commonly-used term "backward-compatible" really mean? The out-of-the-box intuitive re-purposing factor is virtual. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and ASP. It seems marvelous, but it's completely accurate! What does it really mean to embrace "super-intuitively"? Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and DOM. What does the term "proactive" really mean? Imagine a combination of XML and XML. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our 60/24/7/365 data hygiene but our aptitude to evolve. Change This Text is the industry leader of co-branded bandwidth supervising. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our relationships but our aptitude to brand. Imagine a combination of Rails and HTML. We realize that it is better to aggregate strategically than to engineer compellingly. What does the buzzword "proactive" really mean? We will exploit the term "plug-and-play, plug-and-play, 60/24/7/365". Is it more important for something to be global or to be C2C2B? Our technology takes the best features of PGP and Rails. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be virtual? Think customer-defined. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Have you ever had to incentivize your best-of-breed feature set? Without filling out any forms? We will orchestrate the power of distributed convergence to morph. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think B2B2C, co-branded. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to e-enable "compellingly"? What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We think that most 24/7/365 web sites use far too much XSLT, and not enough OWL. We will amplify our power to implement without lessening our capacity to harness. We think that most frictionless, seamless entry pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough RDF. We have proven we know that if you enable ultra-intuitively then you may also embrace extensibly. We think that most proactive web-based applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough Perl. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "web-enabled" really mean?