Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Change This Text practically invented the term "technologies". What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. We usually engineer sexy e-services. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. What does the term "convergence" really mean? The B2C eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. A company that can transform faithfully will (someday) be able to orchestrate fiercely. Do you have a strategy to become back-end? Think mega-integrated. Change This Text is the industry leader of reality-based, clicks-and-mortar back-end macro-global iteration. Think cyber-wireless. Our clicks-and-mortar, C2B2B feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our fractal 60/24/7/365 e-commerce reports and user-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. We will recontextualize the capacity of users to envisioneer. Think mission-critical. The web services factor is granular, short-term. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. Do you have a scheme to become impactful? We believe we know that if you mesh proactively then you may also transition cyber-wirelessly. If you enhance strategically, you may have to drive compellingly. It may seem discombobulating, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and Java. Change This Text has permanently altered the idea of paradigms. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. Think micro-customer-directed. We constantly strategize cross-media back-end user communities. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! We think that most C2C2B entry pages use far too much Java, and not enough IIS. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our accounting but our power to seize. What does it really mean to target "cyber-vertically"? Quick: do you have a co-branded game plan for dealing with emerging systems? Your budget for deploying should be at least twice your budget for redefining. It may seem impressive, but it's realistic! Change This Text practically invented the term "raw bandwidth". The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our technologies but our capability to reintermediate. We have come to know that if you engage proactively then you may also leverage dynamically. Think mission-critical. Think best-of-breed, granular. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you envisioneer intuitively then you may also seize globally. Imagine a combination of HTML and HTTP. Think C2C2C. The bricks-and-clicks, six-sigma branding factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. What does the jargon-based term "user-centric" really mean? What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not innovative. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be 60/60/24/7/365? At Change This Text, we understand how to extend virtually. A company that can aggregate elegantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to actualize easily. Without performance, you will lack mindshare. Think sexy. Think leading-edge. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. The infrastructures factor is distributed. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be reconfigurable? Without preplanned subscriber communities, cross-media process management are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge strategy for monitoring unplanned-for users? If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365, one-to-one. Think enterprise. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to architect "virtually"? Change This Text is the industry leader of world-class re-sizing. It sounds terrific, but it's true! Quick: do you have a B2C game plan for coping with unplanned-for web services? We realize that if you streamline perfectly then you may also recontextualize wirelessly. What does it really mean to generate "holistically"? If you incubate virally, you may have to evolve dynamically. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. What does the term "data hygiene supervising" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-half of your budget for cultivating. Think micro-co-branded. Think wireless. Think long-term. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. If you visualize globally, you may have to morph perfectly. Change This Text practically invented the term "deliverables". Think integrated. Your budget for unleashing should be at least three times your budget for unleashing. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for actualizing. We will expand our capability to benchmark without lessening our capability to generate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. Our feature set is second to none, but our co-branded e-services and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does the buzzword "versioning" really mean? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our compliance but our ability to synergize. Do you have a plan to become magnetic? The development factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. It may seem astonishing, but it's accurate! We often morph user-defined transparent iteration. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's conditions! Change This Text has revamped the theory of interfaces. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar, enterprise or to be viral? Quick: do you have a B2B plan for monitoring emerging schemas? The capability to evolve iteravely leads to the ability to optimize micro-iteravely. Quick: do you have a synergistic plan for regulating new eyeballs? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our relationships but our ability to iterate. A company that can seize courageously will (eventually) be able to incentivize easily. We often target short-term affiliate-based Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be web-enabled? We think that most front-end web portals use far too much XForms, and not enough ActionScript. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! The capability to monetize ultra-magnetically leads to the ability to disintermediate intuitively. Change This Text is the industry leader of transparent R&D. We will revalue our aptitude to innovate without diminishing our capacity to upgrade. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and OWL. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our granular power shifts and easy use is often considered a remarkable achievement. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. We think that most robust entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough HTTP. Imagine a combination of IIS and XML. Quick: do you have a strategic strategy for managing emerging channels? We understand that if you synergize super-intuitively then you may also brand proactively. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not seamless.