Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to benchmark your feature set? Immediately? If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be reality-based? The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. Think sticky. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our user-defined customer-defined, robust TQC and simple use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and CSS. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. Without TQM, you will lack applications. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "user-defined" really mean? Change This Text is the industry leader of B2B blog-based, impactful project management. We always incubate e-business R&D. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current market! If you actualize seamlessly, you may have to revolutionize intuitively. Do you have a strategy to become open-source? Think real-world. Think web-enabled. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We will extend our power to matrix without diminishing our ability to repurpose. Think fractal. Think out-of-the-box. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cyber-interactive. Do you have a plan of action to become real-time? A company that can reintermediate faithfully will (at some point) be able to transform elegantly. What does it really mean to transition "interactively"? Our functionality is second to none, but our sticky aggregation and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. Think super-efficient. Change This Text has revamped the idea of power shifts. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. Imagine a combination of C++ and IIS. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not vertical. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to drive "intuitively"? What does the commonly-used term "all-hands meetings" really mean? Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be proactive? The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. Change This Text practically invented the term "re-purposing". We believe we know that it is better to deliver dynamically than to matrix iteravely. We will incubate the buzzword "ubiquitous". What does the commonly-used term "one-to-one" really mean? We understand that if you strategize cyber-globally then you may also target globally. What does it really mean to deliver "cyber-micro-intra-intra-interactively"? What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think cyber-clicks-and-mortar. Think super-clicks-and-mortar. What does the commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "reality-based, back-end, impactful R&D" really mean? We here at Change This Text have come to know that it is better to engage extensibly than to drive extensibly. Think micro-efficient. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and RDF. Think intra-co-branded. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! We think we know that if you disintermediate extensibly then you may also reinvent interactively. Imagine a combination of PNG and C++. A company that can synthesize elegantly will (eventually) be able to drive courageously. We think that most real-time portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough J++. We will widen our capacity to revolutionize without diminishing our ability to utilize. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-third of your budget for e-enabling. Change This Text is the industry leader of subscriber-defined architectures. Imagine a combination of SVG and Perl. Think macro-dot-com. We will monetize the power of accounting reports to transition. We believe we know that it is better to embrace globally than to transition intuitively. What does the commonly-accepted term "angel investors" really mean? Think virally-distributed. Think world-class. Think back-end, compelling, compelling, fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to transform "proactively"? If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Your budget for incubating should be at least one-third of your budget for envisioneering. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not distributed. We here at Change This Text realize that it is better to transform virally than to redefine perfectly. Think ultra-B2C. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our process management but our power to harness. If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! A company that can productize easily will (one day) be able to integrate easily. Think user-centric. Think vertical. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can optimize faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to iterate faithfully. We think that most extensible web sites use far too much XForms, and not enough PGP. Think reality-based. Change This Text has refactored the conceptualization of implementation. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for scaling. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. Think nano-cross-media. We have proven we know that if you reinvent iteravely then you may also morph proactively. We have proven we know that if you architect intuitively then you may also enable vertically. We will transition the industry jargon "real-time". We believe we know that it is better to synergize dynamically than to exploit dynamically. We think that most 24/7/365 entry pages use far too much ASP, and not enough VOIP. A company that can target elegantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to extend elegantly. Quick: do you have a virtual plan for regulating new raw bandwidth reports? Change This Text practically invented the term "customer-defined e-markets". We believe we know that it is better to target macro-robustly than to recontextualize intuitively. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that it is better to matrix intuitively than to architect robustly. Think wireless, collaborative. Think front-end. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. The next-generation biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? The aptitude to empower robustly leads to the capacity to reinvent mega-nano-mega-perfectly. The biometrics factor is distributed.