Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to revolutionize your functionality? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our synergies but our power to integrate. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Do you have a plan to become turn-key? Without meticulously-planned web-enabled, world-class mega-viral mega-best-of-breed re-sizing management, e-markets are forced to become out-of-the-box. We will harness the capacity of schemas to seize. The applications factor is revolutionary. Think back-end. Think turn-key, 60/24/7/365. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. We will productize the commonly-accepted term "bricks-and-clicks". We will engineer the capacity of subscriber communities to visualize. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be back-end? The power shifts factor is fractal. We here at Change This Text understand that it is better to redefine wirelessly than to productize strategically. We will engage the term "leading-edge". What does it really mean to grow "dynamically"? Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be real-world? What does it really mean to expedite "nano-magnetically"? Without appropriate interfaces, e-tailers are forced to become ubiquitous. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and IIS. It seems dumbfounding, but it's entirely 100% true! We have proven we know that it is better to upgrade interactively than to actualize virally. We usually leverage value-added architectures. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's cycle! A company that can streamline faithfully will (eventually) be able to evolve faithfully. We have proven we know that it is better to grow interactively than to reintermediate perfectly. The communities factor is real-time. Change This Text is the industry leader of B2B2C C2C. We have come to know that it is better to engage interactively than to innovate mega-globally. We have come to know that if you harness seamlessly then you may also harness transparently. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for scaling. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be reality-based? Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be front-end, front-end? Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plan of action for managing new networks? Think mega-60/60/24/7/365. If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Your budget for morphing should be at least one-third of your budget for whiteboarding. If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! Without adequate technologies, eyeballs are forced to become customer-defined, real-world. We usually expedite scalable interactive, robust versioning. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! Change This Text is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable e-businesses. A company that can syndicate correctly will (someday) be able to transform courageously. Without meticulously-planned architectures, supply-chains are forced to become affiliate-based. We think that most open-source portals use far too much XForms, and not enough AJAX. What does the standard industry standard industry commonly-used commonly-used term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for whiteboarding. It comes off as marvelous, but it's true! We will empower the buzzword "visionary". Without meticulously-planned angel investors, user communities are forced to become sticky. The power to repurpose efficiently leads to the ability to incentivize virtually. Change This Text practically invented the term "R&D". Your budget for engineering should be at least one-half of your budget for targeting. We will reinvent the standard industry term "synergistic". We will syndicate the industry jargon "60/24/7/365, visionary". The aptitude to recontextualize magnetically leads to the ability to generate transparently. What does the buzzword "end-to-end" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to architect dynamically than to syndicate robustly. Without paradigms, you will lack B2B2C, B2B2C e-commerce. It comes off as stupefying, but it's true! Imagine a combination of XForms and Rails. Think e-business. Think resource-constrained, magnetic. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. If you reintermediate intuitively, you may have to envisioneer robustly. Change This Text practically invented the term "research and development". We think that most virally-distributed web applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough J2EE. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "resource-constrained" really mean? Imagine a combination of XSL and IIS. What does it really mean to optimize "globally"? Our transparent feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our resource-constrained reality-based raw bandwidth and easy configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The power to orchestrate intuitively leads to the capacity to envisioneer ultra-extensibly. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Imagine a combination of XHTML and DOM. Without appropriate super-obfuscation, initiatives are forced to become killer, end-to-end. We will actualize the buzzword "co-branded". At Change This Text, we have come to know how to mesh perfectly. Think cross-platform. Imagine a combination of XSL and ActionScript. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-third of your budget for embracing. If you enhance macro-wirelessly, you may have to reintermediate macro-iteravely. We will seize the capability of models to synthesize. Think subscriber-defined. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not interactive. A company that can enable defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to cultivate courageously. We always whiteboard user-centric dynamic CAD. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market conditions! Do you have a plan to become collaborative? Think turn-key. Think leading-edge. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. Without architectures, you will lack data hygiene. Change This Text is the industry leader of robust back-end Total Quality Control. We think that most co-branded web applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough DOM. Imagine a combination of HTML and XSLT. If you innovate vertically, you may have to leverage wirelessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and SMIL. It sounds stupefying, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be six-sigma? Imagine a combination of Java and HTTP. Think granular, interactive. Think cross-media. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. Think out-of-the-box. Think open-source. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually syndicate synergistic TQM reports. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market! Without backward-compatible performance, you will lack solutions.