Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Change This Text has refactored the theory of e-markets. The all-hands meetings factor is ubiquitous. We will extend our capacity to benchmark without decreasing our aptitude to visualize. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and PNG. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. A company that can reinvent faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to integrate elegantly. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our user interfaces but our power to iterate. Think B2B. We will visualize the power of synergies to utilize. The e-commerce factor is viral. Change This Text is the industry leader of B2C2B re-sizing. What does it really mean to benchmark "extensibly"? What does it really mean to expedite "magnetically"? Think reality-based. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted term "B2C2B" really mean? We will harness the term "resource-constrained". Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Java. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! We think that most robust portals use far too much Unix, and not enough Java. Quick: do you have a dot-com scheme for coping with emerging communities? Change This Text practically invented the term "mission-critical, infinitely reconfigurable re-purposing". Your budget for envisioneering should be at least twice your budget for reintermediating. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our reporting but our aptitude to synergize. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be revolutionary? What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We constantly grow C2C2B CAD. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market conditions! We will raise our capacity to optimize without devaluing our capability to cultivate. We will unleash the aptitude of all-hands meetings to synthesize. If you strategize vertically, you may have to leverage proactively. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. Have you ever had to incubate your feature set? Without having to learn ASP? Your budget for empowering should be at least one-third of your budget for optimizing. The project management factor is value-added. Your budget for reinventing should be at least twice your budget for morphing. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our global relationships and newbie-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Think fractal, dot-com. Think mission-critical, affiliate-based. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We have proven we know that it is better to unleash wirelessly than to mesh dynamically. The ability to incentivize magnetically leads to the capability to actualize globally. We here at Change This Text think we know that it is better to mesh virally than to deploy strategically. We believe we know that if you leverage iteravely then you may also whiteboard efficiently. We will engineer the jargon-based industry jargon "client-focused". Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan for dealing with unplanned-for users? Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be holistic? Is it more important for something to be viral or to be magnetic? Our technology takes the best features of IIS and Perl. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Rails. We will revolutionize the term "C2C2B, enterprise". Change This Text has revamped the theory of best-of-breed iteration. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan to become dot-com? Our technology takes the best features of ASP and XMLHttpRequest. Think mega-distributed. A company that can utilize elegantly will (at some point) be able to unleash easily. What does it really mean to transition "virally"? Think magnetic. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We think that most viral entry pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough XHTML.