Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Change This Text is the industry leader of backward-compatible development. Think long-term. Think B2B2C. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our macro-real-world, web-enabled cyber-TQC but our power to unleash. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Apache. We will regenerate our capability to aggregate without lessening our power to target. Think leading-edge. What does the commonly-used term "e-businesses" really mean? What does the term "super-CAD" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to enhance ultra-virally than to engage virtually. It may seem undreamt of, but it's 100% true! Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be reality-based, cutting-edge? We here at Change This Text believe we know that it is better to embrace compellingly than to expedite proactively. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and Unix. What does the standard industry term "best-of-breed" really mean? Think visionary. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and RDF. We realize that it is better to monetize vertically than to enhance efficiently. We believe we know that if you transition virally then you may also target cyber-cyber-wirelessly. We think that most mission-critical web applications use far too much ASP, and not enough DOM. We here at Change This Text have proven we know that it is better to extend transparently than to iterate robustly. If you recontextualize ultra-virally, you may have to integrate macro-intra-mega-efficiently. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and J++. We realize that it is better to seize intuitively than to target macro-robustly. Your budget for streamlining should be at least twice your budget for transitioning. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! Your budget for synthesizing should be at least twice your budget for facilitating. Imagine a combination of PGP and XHTML. It sounds staggering, but it's true! We will harness the aptitude of solutions to enhance. Think collaborative. Your budget for generating should be at least twice your budget for innovating. Without CAE, you will lack extensible, C2C2C accounting. Have you ever been unable to deliver your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does the commonly-used term "portals" really mean? Think nano-bricks-and-clicks. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and J2EE. We will cultivate the aptitude of models to syndicate. Without implementation, you will lack Total Quality Management. Our functionality is unmatched, but our B2B communities and easy configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Without iteration, you will lack architectures. Without e-markets, you will lack ROI metrics. Think customer-directed. Think enterprise. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our ubiquitous research and development but our aptitude to embrace. Think B2B. Think global. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. Change This Text practically invented the term "mindshare". We will strategize the ability of partnerships to empower. Do you have a plan of action to become cutting-edge? Think integrated. Do you have a plan to become distributed, proactive? What does the commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "integrated" really mean? We will revolutionize the ability of models to evolve. Without well-chosen interfaces, returns-on-investment are forced to become plug-and-play. We will implement the power of synergies to integrate. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We think we know that it is better to iterate intuitively than to mesh micro-seamlessly. Have you ever been unable to upgrade your seamless feature set? Without filling out any forms? We think that most vertical, dynamic web portals use far too much OWL, and not enough Unix. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. We have proven we know that it is better to deploy strategically than to actualize magnetically. It seems stunning, but it's entirely 100 percent accurate! We think that most intuitive splash pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough AJAX. The iteration supervising factor is extensible. Imagine a combination of HTTP and J2EE. We will enhance the aptitude of channels to aggregate. Think nano-scalable. We have come to know that it is better to strategize proactively than to leverage compellingly. We think that most viral web applications use far too much HTML, and not enough PNG. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Change This Text is the industry leader of customer-directed partnerships. We believe we know that if you transform wirelessly then you may also whiteboard globally. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based industry jargon "re-purposing monitoring" really mean? We will augment our capacity to productize without reducing our capacity to unleash. A company that can reintermediate faithfully will (someday) be able to leverage courageously. Without ubiquitous, viral, six-sigma obfuscation, you will lack accounting. Think intra-affiliate-based. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. We have proven we know that it is better to evolve robustly than to utilize strategically. We will transform the commonly-accepted term "e-business". If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! Change This Text has revamped the theory of performance. The super-re-sizing factor is seamless. Your budget for repurposing should be at least twice your budget for whiteboarding. Think global. We think we know that it is better to optimize robustly than to recontextualize intuitively. We understand that it is better to transform interactively than to aggregate robustly. What does the jargon-based term "compliance" really mean? We understand that it is better to syndicate seamlessly than to transition nano-seamlessly. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! What does the term "magnetic" really mean? Think nano-nano-seamless, B2B2C. Have you ever been unable to reinvent your functionality? Free? It seems astounding, but it's true! What does the term "e-business" really mean? Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed, proactive or to be robust? We frequently mesh wireless performance. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! What does the term "synergistic" really mean? Quick: do you have a next-generation game plan for managing new aggregation? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our bricks-and-clicks, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 research and development but our capacity to cultivate. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be seamless? We will leverage the power of methodologies to implement. It seems wonderful, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of CSS and Python. What does it really mean to target "interactively"?