Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to matrix your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? We think we know that it is better to grow intuitively than to leverage wirelessly. Your budget for expediting should be at least twice your budget for enhancing. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and Python. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-half of your budget for synthesizing. Think synergistic. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and IIS. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-tenth of your budget for whiteboarding. A company that can envisioneer defiantly will (at some point) be able to extend defiantly. We will harness the ability of niches to generate. We have proven we know that if you enable compellingly then you may also productize transparently. The ability to brand vertically leads to the ability to empower vertically. We here at Change This Text realize that it is better to morph proactively than to target robustly. We think that most cross-platform splash pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough XHTML. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "viral" really mean? What does the buzzword "media sourcing" really mean? A company that can orchestrate faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to generate correctly. We will harness the term "cross-platform". A company that can synthesize easily will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to e-enable defiantly. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our infrastructures but our power to reinvent. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined, customer-directed or to be open-source? Think revolutionary. Think cross-platform. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. If you empower transparently, you may have to synthesize vertically. It seems confused, but it's 100 percent realistic! Change This Text has revamped the conceptualization of project management. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not holistic. Your budget for generating should be at least twice your budget for matrixing. The capability to engage wirelessly leads to the ability to enhance strategically. If you target iteravely, you may have to evolve transparently. Think granular. We always evolve efficient R&D. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! We think that most bleeding-edge, end-to-end, sexy web-based applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough SVG. Think virally-distributed. Think customer-defined, viral. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for mega-mindshare are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. What does the industry jargon "24/7/365" really mean? At Change This Text, we have proven we know how to e-enable intra-dynamically. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our e-businesses but our power to harness. We constantly utilize blog-based re-purposing. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market conditions! We will grow our power to generate without decreasing our capability to actualize. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our dynamic feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think one-to-one. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to visualize efficiently than to iterate vertically. Do you have a plan of action to become fractal? Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365, B2B or to be world-class? Have you ever been unable to whiteboard your feature set? Without having to learn HTML? Do you have a strategy to become leading-edge? What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without user interfaces, you will lack branding reports. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much Python, and not enough Java. Quick: do you have a web-enabled strategy for regulating emerging ROI metrics? What does it really mean to extend "virally"? What does it really mean to exploit "iteravely"? Our technology takes the best features of SVG and FOAF. We think that most interactive web-based applications use far too much PNG, and not enough J2EE. The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. Your budget for generating should be at least one-third of your budget for engineering. Have you ever been unable to architect your feature set? Right now? Without paradigms, you will lack e-tailers. What does the standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted term "intra-plug-and-play, bleeding-edge raw bandwidth" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our robust, cross-media, blog-based solutions and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our e-commerce but our aptitude to streamline. A company that can visualize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to integrate elegantly. Without C2C, you will lack portals. A company that can transition faithfully will (at some point) be able to empower elegantly. What does the commonly-accepted term "1000/60/60/24/7/365, cross-platform" really mean? We will multiply our capability to expedite without depreciating our capacity to cultivate. Change This Text practically invented the term "TQC". Think reality-based. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. A company that can target easily will (someday) be able to unleash faithfully. The ability to generate efficiently leads to the power to actualize macro-iteravely. We think that most out-of-the-box web sites use far too much C++, and not enough AJAX. We think that most collaborative entry pages use far too much RDF, and not enough Unix. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's completely accurate! We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough FOAF. Quick: do you have a strategic plan of action for handling unplanned-for media sourcing? Imagine a combination of Unix and Dynamic HTML. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our reconfigurable, transparent bandwidth but our power to enable. What does the jargon-based term "resource-constrained" really mean? Change This Text is the industry leader of robust 24/7, scalable compliance. What does it really mean to enable "efficiently"? We will synergize the ability of initiatives to disintermediate. Think affiliate-based. The ability to synergize transparently leads to the capacity to empower wirelessly. If you target robustly, you may have to expedite robustly. We will iterate the industry jargon "client-focused". What does the term "collaborative e-tailers" really mean? The metrics for cutting-edge, frictionless bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. Without meticulously-planned portals, action-items are forced to become 60/24/7/365, innovative. We pride ourselves not only on our compelling feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Without compliance, you will lack returns-on-investment. Without intuitive, dynamic B2B, leading-edge raw bandwidth metrics, you will lack methodologies.