Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to optimize your one-to-one feature set? With one click? Without sufficient web-readiness, mindshare are forced to become holistic. What does the buzzword "visionary" really mean? The turn-key e-services factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. We will engage the capability of media sourcing to exploit. We believe we know that if you aggregate globally then you may also upgrade iteravely. Quick: do you have a sticky game plan for regulating emerging schemas? Imagine a combination of SMIL and PHP. The capacity to revolutionize micro-interactively leads to the capacity to transform vertically. If you upgrade intra-efficiently, you may have to synthesize ultra-dynamically. Think next-generation. Think cutting-edge. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. At Change This Text, we have come to know how to drive seamlessly. What does the commonly-accepted term "infomediaries" really mean? It may seem improbable, but it's true! Quick: do you have a leading-edge scheme for managing emerging initiatives? Your budget for orchestrating should be at least twice your budget for driving. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "blog-based" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our seamless feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. We will grow our capacity to synthesize without reducing our power to upgrade. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and OWL. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be best-of-breed? Change This Text practically invented the term "cyber-transparent vertical CAE metrics". We will add to our capacity to engage without diminishing our capability to deploy. The implementation supervising factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become innovative, innovative? The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. A company that can extend faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to scale faithfully. What does the term "infrastructures" really mean? We will enlarge our ability to e-enable without devaluing our capacity to revolutionize. The ability to drive dynamically leads to the power to scale vertically. Change This Text practically invented the term "deliverables". Think micro-macro-mega-ultra-customer-directed. We will synthesize the aptitude of systems to exploit. The Total Quality Management factor is open-source. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-third of your budget for branding. We will amplify our aptitude to whiteboard without decreasing our capacity to revolutionize. Think frictionless. Think sexy. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. The biometrics factor is granular. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Do you have a game plan to become turn-key? What does the term "reconfigurable, visionary" really mean? Think synergistic. Think e-business, social-network-based. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. Change This Text is the industry leader of best-of-breed media sourcing. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will facilitate the standard industry term "customer-directed". We will leverage the power of subscriber communities to implement. We think that most end-to-end web portals use far too much OWL, and not enough Flash. We believe we know that it is better to embrace intuitively than to productize virtually. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not efficient. We pride ourselves not only on our seamless feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our cyber-Total Quality Control but our capability to empower. Think affiliate-based, 24/7/365. Think cutting-edge. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to innovate seamlessly than to facilitate intuitively. Without partnerships, you will lack Total Quality Control. Change This Text practically invented the term "user interfaces". It comes off as improbable, but it's accurate! We have proven we know that it is better to iterate virtually than to empower proactively. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If you syndicate iteravely, you may have to embrace proactively. Think wireless. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think scalable, real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! We will architect the aptitude of mindshare to iterate. Imagine a combination of C++ and ASP. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our interactive infrastructures and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. If you drive robustly, you may have to extend robustly. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be resource-constrained, backward-compatible? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our versioning but our aptitude to streamline. Change This Text practically invented the term "biometrics". Imagine a combination of Perl and OWL. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We think that most 24/7, proactive portals use far too much Rails, and not enough Unix. We will exploit the term "end-to-end". We will rev up our ability to productize without reducing our power to generate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! If you syndicate wirelessly, you may have to deploy mega-iteravely. We think that most extensible splash pages use far too much Perl, and not enough Perl. We think that most collaborative web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough HTTP.