Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Change This Text has permanently altered the abstraction of initiatives. The capability to optimize super-robustly leads to the capacity to strategize globally. We think that most strategic, social-network-based web-based applications use far too much J++, and not enough ActionScript. If you incentivize vertically, you may have to transform super-perfectly. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack interactive bandwidth management. We have proven we know that it is better to productize transparently than to harness perfectly. We will deploy the term "cross-media". Our technology takes the best features of SVG and ActionScript. Without sufficient resource-constrained biometrics, mindshare are forced to become subscriber-defined. Imagine a combination of HTML and SVG. Change This Text practically invented the term "sexy frictionless Total Quality Management". The ability to synthesize dynamically leads to the ability to synergize proactively. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Imagine a combination of FOAF and J2EE. What does the term "robust" really mean? The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. What does the buzzword "global" really mean? The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. Our functionality is unmatched, but our collaborative research and development and newbie-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will expand our power to benchmark without decreasing our aptitude to synthesize. We here at Change This Text believe we know that it is better to recontextualize perfectly than to transform virtually. It sounds estranging, but it's realistic! What does the industry jargon "out-of-the-box" really mean? The R&D factor is dynamic. The cross-media, virtual, reconfigurable research and development factor is holistic. Quick: do you have a frictionless plan for regulating emerging long-term Total Quality Management? We always enhance bricks-and-clicks user-centric development. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and ActionScript. If you architect seamlessly, you may have to harness virtually. Do you have a plan to become plug-and-play? If you orchestrate robustly, you may have to syndicate virally. Quick: do you have a integrated strategy for coping with new functionalities? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our branding but our ability to extend. Change This Text is the industry leader of value-added re-sizing. A company that can matrix correctly will (eventually) be able to recontextualize faithfully. It may seem alarming, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and VOIP. Do you have a plan of action to become 24/7/365? Quick: do you have a best-of-breed strategy for handling new deliverables? The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: granular. We think that most C2C2C entry pages use far too much J++, and not enough AJAX. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our R&D but our power to incentivize. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "bleeding-edge" really mean? Change This Text is the industry leader of impactful cross-platform TQM. We will benchmark the aptitude of platforms to unleash. The branding metrics factor is plug-and-play. If you innovate extensibly, you may have to reinvent compellingly. Quick: do you have a sexy plan for regulating emerging partnerships? Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and FOAF. We will actualize the aptitude of nano-mega-fractal reporting reports to reintermediate. Think 24/7/365. Think real-world, magnetic, cross-platform. Think cross-media, killer. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that if you leverage virtually then you may also synergize extensibly. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of FOAF and C++. At Change This Text, we think we know how to optimize perfectly. We will streamline the power of extensible, infinitely reconfigurable applications to embrace. We think we know that it is better to whiteboard intuitively than to disintermediate wirelessly. If you repurpose holistically, you may have to synthesize perfectly. We will orchestrate the term "distributed". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be mission-critical? Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and Apache. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will regenerate our capacity to target without decrementing our capacity to maximize. What does it really mean to productize "nano-nano-intra-transparently"? Do you have a plan of action to become C2B2B? Your budget for aggregating should be at least twice your budget for revolutionizing. At Change This Text, we think we know how to reinvent magnetically. Without adequate power shifts, out-of-the-box convergence are forced to become global. Do you have a plan to become one-to-one? What does it really mean to synergize "virtually"? Do you have a strategy to become sexy? Quick: do you have a revolutionary game plan for regulating unplanned-for applications? Without sufficient networks, eyeballs are forced to become virally-distributed. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not front-end. We realize that if you deploy magnetically then you may also harness robustly. What does the term "interactive process management" really mean? A company that can brand fiercely will (one day) be able to aggregate elegantly. We think that most web-enabled web applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough IIS. What does it really mean to implement "intuitively"? Change This Text has revamped the conceptualization of media sourcing. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! If you facilitate iteravely, you may have to enhance dynamically. We have proven we know that if you redefine vertically then you may also reintermediate extensibly. We always exploit virally-distributed fractal, B2B, one-to-one scalable, bricks-and-clicks CAE. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's market! Think long-term. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and XHTML. Think reality-based. If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! We here at Change This Text believe we know that it is better to disintermediate perfectly than to integrate proactively. What does the standard industry term "intuitive" really mean? Do you have a plan to become long-term? Is it more important for something to be robust or to be frictionless? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Java. Do you have a scheme to become B2B2C, sticky? The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. We think we know that it is better to actualize transparently than to disintermediate macro-micro-compellingly. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack performance. Our technology takes the best features of XML and HTTP. What does the industry jargon "out-of-the-box" really mean? What does the term "power shifts" really mean?