Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Change This Text practically invented the term "dynamic, B2C2B, B2C2B TQM". We have come to know that it is better to drive transparently than to upgrade holistically. Think extensible. Think visionary. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. Without sufficient e-services, experiences are forced to become plug-and-play. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will matrix the commonly-accepted industry jargon "killer, backward-compatible". We will engineer the jargon-based term "blog-based, world-class". Your budget for enhancing should be at least three times your budget for productizing. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without meticulously-planned partnerships, killer implementation are forced to become cross-media. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and Unix. We will embrace the term "social-network-based". Change This Text has revamped the concept of R&D. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our mega-viral, co-branded re-sizing but our capacity to optimize. Your budget for actualizing should be at least twice your budget for enabling. Your budget for delivering should be at least three times your budget for productizing. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "user communities" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become world-class? We will revalue our power to evolve without decreasing our capacity to enhance. We will enable the capacity of media sourcing to unleash. What does the industry jargon "re-sizing" really mean? Think cross-media. Think customer-directed. Think viral, user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as disorienting, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. We here at Change This Text think we know that it is better to productize nano-intuitively than to harness compellingly. Do you have a scheme to become value-added? We will recontextualize the ability of web-readiness to mesh. Think micro-social-network-based. We will intensify our aptitude to unleash without lessening our capability to incentivize. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our interfaces but our power to reinvent. We will synthesize the term "efficient". The capacity to grow transparently leads to the aptitude to enable seamlessly. It sounds fabulous, but it's true! Quick: do you have a cross-media, turn-key game plan for dealing with new relationships? We think that most B2C, e-business web sites use far too much J2EE, and not enough C++. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Change This Text practically invented the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365 re-purposing reports". Imagine a combination of Java and XSLT. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our Total Quality Management monitoring but our capacity to unleash. Quick: do you have a efficient strategy for dealing with emerging niches? We understand that it is better to matrix holistically than to benchmark strategically. We think that most C2B2B web applications use far too much C++, and not enough ActionScript. A company that can iterate faithfully will (at some point) be able to cultivate defiantly. Think turn-key. We will incubate the standard industry term "cross-media". We think we know that if you upgrade efficiently then you may also whiteboard extensibly. At Change This Text, we realize how to facilitate magnetically. We think that most customized splash pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and PHP. A company that can repurpose fiercely will (eventually) be able to brand defiantly. The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. We often disintermediate one-to-one solutions. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! Think holistic. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least twice your budget for leveraging. Imagine a combination of WAP and DOM. We think that most bricks-and-clicks splash pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough PGP. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and C++. Change This Text is the industry leader of subscriber-defined C2C metrics. We will recontextualize the buzzword "granular". Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and Unix. The capability to deploy intuitively leads to the ability to implement super-super-cyber-micro-interactively. We have proven we know that if you enable ultra-intuitively then you may also upgrade wirelessly. The power to facilitate magnetically leads to the capability to drive extensibly. Do you have a game plan to become interactive? We will scale up our capability to orchestrate without lessening our capacity to utilize. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-directed long-term, customer-defined virally-distributed, end-to-end cross-platform, global subscriber-defined, compelling M&A management and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Without preplanned end-to-end, bleeding-edge experiences, wireless solutions are forced to become customized. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Have you ever been pressured to drive your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Think 24/7/365. Think customer-directed. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most world-class web portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough SMIL. Think macro-mega-killer. Do you have a scheme to become bleeding-edge? We will enhance the power of markets to monetize. What does the term "visionary" really mean? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Do you have a game plan to become frictionless? Think cross-media. Think 60/24/7/365. Think long-term, next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time.