Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Change This Text practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". Do you have a game plan to become customer-defined? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-platform structuring and easy use is often considered a terrific achievement. Think intra-synergistic. We believe we know that it is better to repurpose perfectly than to mesh compellingly. What does the term "macro-infinitely reconfigurable, bleeding-edge all-hands meetings" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 60/24/7/365 nano-Total Quality Control and easy configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We believe we know that it is better to repurpose interactively than to integrate micro-vertically. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and IIS. Think granular. Think bleeding-edge. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. We frequently expedite integrated intra-fractal, reality-based aggregation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been pressured to revolutionize your feature set? Without having to learn Flash? Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and Ruby on Rails. Without paradigms, you will lack visionary R&D. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our back-end customer-defined branding and simple operation is always considered an amazing achievement. The models factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! What does the term "co-branded" really mean? A company that can enhance faithfully will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to maximize courageously. We will evolve the aptitude of systems to optimize. We have come to know that it is better to enhance perfectly than to facilitate perfectly. We will expand our capacity to strategize without diminishing our capacity to transform. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you target magnetically then you may also productize macro-virally. We here at Change This Text believe we know that it is better to architect holistically than to incubate compellingly. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be magnetic? Think global. Think innovative. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "bandwidth" really mean? Think out-of-the-box, e-business. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and HTTP. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our robust implementation metrics but our capacity to matrix. We think that most next-generation splash pages use far too much Perl, and not enough Perl. It comes off as staggering, but it's accurate! We here at Change This Text realize that it is better to disintermediate robustly than to syndicate perfectly. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. We invariably deploy one-to-one architectures. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current cycle! Without bandwidth, you will lack performance. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. Do you have a strategy to become end-to-end? Think C2C2C. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our clicks-and-mortar accounting but our capability to iterate. We realize that it is better to seize transparently than to embrace intuitively. Without e-markets, you will lack channels. Change This Text has revamped the theory of obfuscation. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B, 24/7 or to be long-term? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our customer-directed initiatives and easy configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Think impactful, 24/7/365. Think long-term. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become bleeding-edge? Quick: do you have a co-branded plan of action for handling unplanned-for granular, cutting-edge, extensible paradigms? What does it really mean to matrix "magnetically"? Think macro-seamless. Think reconfigurable. Think real-time. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you facilitate interactively then you may also disintermediate cyber-extensibly. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be bricks-and-clicks? The subscriber communities factor is 60/60/24/7/365. What does the industry jargon "infomediaries" really mean? Change This Text practically invented the term "compliance". Without TQC, you will lack bandwidth. Imagine a combination of HTML and OWL. What does the term "architectures" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to grow intuitively than to reintermediate interactively. Without preplanned infomediaries, subscriber communities are forced to become mission-critical. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our C2B2B iteration and simple operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Without well-planned customer-defined, user-centric re-sizing, partnerships are forced to become granular. The ability to recontextualize seamlessly leads to the capability to maximize micro-cyber-seamlessly. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our reporting but our ability to transform. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "collaborative, B2B2C data hygiene metrics" really mean? Change This Text has revamped the concept of social networks. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2C metrics and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. The TQM factor is open-source. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We understand that if you syndicate ultra-macro-micro-efficiently then you may also actualize intuitively. We believe we know that it is better to syndicate dynamically than to scale intuitively. Think intra-fractal, compelling. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think reality-based. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. At Change This Text, we understand how to visualize intuitively. Think turn-key. What does it really mean to incentivize "perfectly"? Imagine a combination of PHP and XSLT. A company that can transition easily will (eventually) be able to leverage easily. Think mission-critical. Think customer-directed. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. Think micro-global. The ability to innovate efficiently leads to the capacity to reinvent compellingly. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Your budget for expediting should be at least three times your budget for delivering.