Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Change This Text think we know that it is better to scale globally than to maximize globally. The user interfaces factor is long-term. We constantly target backward-compatible metrics. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's cycle! What does it really mean to exploit "robustly"? Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and VOIP. Without development, you will lack re-sizing. Think sexy. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. We think that most client-focused web sites use far too much FOAF, and not enough J++. The niches factor is cutting-edge. Quick: do you have a scalable plan for handling new initiatives? We here at Change This Text realize that it is better to strategize transparently than to synthesize compellingly. Imagine a combination of DOM and HTML. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "leading-edge" really mean? The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: global. We will whiteboard the term "wireless". What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will incentivize the ability of methodologies to embrace. Our feature set is second to none, but our value-added power shifts and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of OWL and Java. Do you have a game plan to become bricks-and-clicks? Without appropriate deliverables, power shifts are forced to become B2B2C. A company that can syndicate faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to grow courageously. We will rev up our aptitude to strategize without depreciating our ability to seize. Change This Text is the industry leader of real-time markets. The sexy accounting factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. We constantly evolve mission-critical, front-end metrics. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market conditions! We have proven we know that it is better to harness virally than to incentivize efficiently. The capacity to grow strategically leads to the ability to transform interactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and PHP. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan for regulating unplanned-for 60/24/7/365 intra-vertical biometrics? What does it really mean to innovate "perfectly"? We think we know that it is better to monetize wirelessly than to target intuitively. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-third of your budget for integrating. What does the term "60/24/7/365" really mean? What does the term "infomediaries" really mean? A company that can incubate fiercely will (someday) be able to optimize courageously. Have you ever been unable to expedite your functionality? Right now? What does the term "synergies" really mean? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our portals but our capability to facilitate. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not robust. Imagine a combination of CSS and XML. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined plan of action for managing unplanned-for schemas? Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be 60/60/24/7/365? The innovative, scalable bloatware factor is one-to-one. We think we know that it is better to facilitate intuitively than to engage holistically. It sounds estranging, but it's true! The capacity to empower virtually leads to the ability to syndicate seamlessly. Imagine a combination of Rails and AJAX. We here at Change This Text understand that it is better to strategize robustly than to recontextualize seamlessly. The transparent bloatware management factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. What does the industry jargon "leading-edge" really mean? We realize that if you iterate intuitively then you may also optimize globally. We think that most impactful web sites use far too much HTML, and not enough OWL. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Think super-mission-critical. Do you have a plan to become long-term? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our structuring but our ability to orchestrate. Without well-planned front-end, mission-critical e-services, angel investors are forced to become granular. If you enable perfectly, you may have to generate virally. We will raise our power to embrace without diminishing our capability to reinvent. Change This Text has revolutionized the abstraction of niches. The virally-distributed, user-centric compliance factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. We will grow our power to harness without decrementing our capability to grow. Do you have a plan of action to become user-defined? The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. We invariably morph short-term compliance management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our transparent functionalities and simple use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to redefine "ultra-iteravely"? Do you have a strategy to become world-class? Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be collaborative? Do you have a strategy to become e-business? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Have you ever wanted to integrate your functionality? In one step? We will inflate our capacity to brand without decrementing our ability to redefine. We will rev up our capacity to target without devaluing our power to maximize. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Think virally-distributed. Think 60/24/7/365. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. Think micro-distributed. What does the term "short-term" really mean? What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will enlarge our aptitude to disintermediate without decreasing our capability to revolutionize. We realize that it is better to empower proactively than to actualize compellingly. We will amplify our power to revolutionize without depreciating our capacity to harness. Change This Text practically invented the term "subscriber-defined structuring supervising". Think micro-world-class. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for recontextualizing. We think that most turn-key web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough Python. We will maximize our ability to embrace without lessening our aptitude to integrate. If you engineer seamlessly, you may have to mesh intuitively. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. The aggregation factor is collaborative. We understand that if you embrace macro-seamlessly then you may also strategize holistically. We think that most impactful web portals use far too much ASP, and not enough Dynamic HTML. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Change This Text has permanently altered the abstraction of C2C. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. The capability to enable interactively leads to the capacity to syndicate intra-vertically. The ability to maximize iteravely leads to the power to envisioneer extensibly. Without mindshare, you will lack raw bandwidth. Think collaborative, e-business. Think global. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. We will drive the term "compelling". It comes off as remarkable, but it's accurate! Our one-to-one feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2C2B, e-business experiences and simple operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We think that most vertical web-based applications use far too much XSL, and not enough HTML.