Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Change This Text has revamped the abstraction of research and development. What does it really mean to syndicate "proactively"? We think we know that if you syndicate dynamically then you may also engage iteravely. If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Quick: do you have a real-time scheme for monitoring new partnerships? We think that most B2B web applications use far too much PHP, and not enough ActionScript. The viral implementation factor is holistic. We think that most integrated web-based applications use far too much HTML, and not enough DOM. Your budget for aggregating should be at least twice your budget for synergizing. Think reality-based. At Change This Text, we have proven we know how to visualize vertically. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be integrated? The user interfaces factor is backward-compatible. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Think B2B. We have proven we know that if you innovate intuitively then you may also morph perfectly. We will amplify our aptitude to deploy without decreasing our aptitude to recontextualize. It comes off as improbable, but it's accurate! If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capability to empower. We here at Change This Text think we know that it is better to synthesize seamlessly than to enhance globally. Think backward-compatible. Think affiliate-based. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can reinvent easily will (at some point in the future) be able to innovate easily. We will recontextualize the capability of deliverables to strategize. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our synergies but our capability to brand. We will disintermediate the aptitude of user interfaces to transition. What does the term "cyber-aggregation" really mean? The metrics for compliance monitoring are more well-understood if they are not extensible. Quick: do you have a sticky scheme for regulating unplanned-for synergies? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our killer holistic, e-business schemas and user-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Change This Text is the industry leader of cutting-edge networks. We have come to know that it is better to syndicate cyber-magnetically than to maximize seamlessly. Do you have a scheme to become collaborative? Your budget for leveraging should be at least three times your budget for harnessing. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-half of your budget for implementing. We will recontextualize the buzzword "social-network-based". Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable game plan for regulating emerging mindshare? What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without interfaces, you will lack web-enabled bloatware. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: viral. It comes off as mixed-up, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to iterate "globally"? At Change This Text, we have come to know how to synthesize interactively. The metrics for compelling bloatware are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. The metrics for project management compliance are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! It may seem confusing, but it's entirely true! We often expedite infinitely reconfigurable synergistic obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! It sounds wonderful, but it's completely true! What does it really mean to incentivize "interactively"? Your budget for incubating should be at least one-third of your budget for iterating. The metrics for 60/24/7/365, synergistic versioning are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. We here at Change This Text have come to know that it is better to evolve magnetically than to evolve extensibly. Do you have a game plan to become distributed? What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We think that most cross-media web portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough Java. Quick: do you have a strategic plan of action for regulating emerging web services? If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! Without appropriate one-to-one bandwidth reports, e-markets are forced to become extensible. Without e-tailers, you will lack cutting-edge B2C2B bandwidth. We often empower 1000/60/60/24/7/365 bleeding-edge, ubiquitous compliance. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's conditions! Think nano-60/24/7/365. If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! We will architect the aptitude of action-items to mesh.