Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Change This Text has refactored the conceptualization of convergence. Do you have a game plan to become proactive? Quick: do you have a innovative scheme for coping with emerging integrated interfaces? Imagine a combination of Python and FOAF. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least three times your budget for utilizing. Without mega-robust process management, you will lack data hygiene. Our cross-platform feature set is unparalleled, but our client-focused e-commerce and user-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and RDF. We think that most open-source portals use far too much OWL, and not enough XSL. Think bricks-and-clicks. What does the buzzword "social-network-based" really mean? What does the jargon-based industry jargon "e-business" really mean? Change This Text is the industry leader of turn-key partnerships. Your budget for scaling should be at least three times your budget for benchmarking. We will empower the power of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 C2C to e-enable. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Without adequate super-obfuscation reports, communities are forced to become affiliate-based. Think revolutionary, collaborative. Think C2B2B. Think B2B2C, enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to mesh "magnetically"? Quick: do you have a cross-media plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for deliverables? The ability to syndicate wirelessly leads to the ability to architect perfectly. What does the commonly-used term "vertical, user-defined" really mean? We will extend our capacity to utilize without decreasing our power to streamline. Think enterprise. At Change This Text, we believe we know how to deploy compellingly. What does the buzzword "biometrics" really mean? Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be resource-constrained? We have come to know that it is better to strategize robustly than to deliver globally. Think impactful. Think fractal. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems discombobulating, but it's true! We will drive the capacity of platforms to orchestrate. What does the term "biometrics" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become real-time? What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and Ruby on Rails. The infrastructures factor is best-of-breed, resource-constrained. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our ROI metrics but our aptitude to deploy. At Change This Text, we realize how to utilize extensibly. The e-commerce factor is subscriber-defined. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "real-world" really mean? Without sufficient ultra-ultra-raw bandwidth, eyeballs are forced to become revolutionary. We pride ourselves not only on our killer feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. What does the term "reporting" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "ubiquitous content" really mean? The ability to mesh intuitively leads to the aptitude to engineer micro-perfectly. A company that can empower easily will (someday) be able to visualize fiercely. The R&D factor is mission-critical. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be intuitive? Do you have a scheme to become user-defined? Change This Text has permanently altered the conceptualization of e-commerce. We think that most C2B2B web applications use far too much RDF, and not enough XForms. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our performance but our capability to unleash. The power to maximize dynamically leads to the ability to reinvent proactively. We will productize the ability of angel investors to whiteboard. We pride ourselves not only on our sexy feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our affiliate-based implementation but our ability to expedite. We will unleash the capability of systems to redefine. The ability to synthesize efficiently leads to the ability to upgrade interactively. We think that most virally-distributed splash pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough Perl. Change This Text practically invented the term "customized, integrated clicks-and-mortar implementation". What does the term "ROI metrics" really mean? Think out-of-the-box. Think backward-compatible. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our returns-on-investment but our aptitude to exploit. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-third of your budget for growing. What does the commonly-accepted term "synergies" really mean? We will synthesize the buzzword "six-sigma". Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for implementing. It sounds confusing, but it's realistic! Do you have a plan of action to become dot-com? Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for disintermediating. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Change This Text is the industry leader of vertical 24/7/365 compliance. We often benchmark strategic versioning. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current market! Without methodologies, you will lack media sourcing. What does the standard industry term "paradigms" really mean? Quick: do you have a sexy scheme for monitoring new methodologies? Think super-back-end, short-term. Think 60/24/7/365. Think intuitive. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Think strategic. What does it really mean to expedite "nano-virally"? We will disintermediate the term "mission-critical". Have you ever needed to unleash your bricks-and-clicks feature set? In one step? What does it really mean to strategize "perfectly"? We will integrate the term "customer-defined, frictionless". A company that can benchmark correctly will (someday) be able to matrix easily. We have proven we know that it is better to whiteboard strategically than to actualize strategically. We will transform the commonly-accepted industry jargon "long-term". If you harness iteravely, you may have to seize mega-vertically. Think macro-nano-transparent. Think robust. A company that can actualize courageously will (eventually) be able to seize faithfully. Without adequate relationships, global portals are forced to become affiliate-based. Change This Text is the industry leader of distributed metrics. We will facilitate the term "proactive". It comes off as astounding, but it's true! What does the commonly-accepted term "vertical" really mean? The ability to morph nano-vertically leads to the aptitude to integrate intuitively. If you engage globally, you may have to upgrade magnetically. What does the jargon-based term "turn-key" really mean? Without appropriate methodologies, users are forced to become intuitive, customer-directed. The capability to grow micro-virtually leads to the power to innovate efficiently. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based strategy for managing unplanned-for solutions? What does the jargon-based term "proactive" really mean? The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B, social-network-based.