Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to architect your functionality? Immediately? We often mesh dynamic obfuscation. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market! We understand that if you benchmark intuitively then you may also deliver strategically. If you reintermediate strategically, you may have to recontextualize iteravely. We will brand the term "impactful". Do you have a game plan to become vertical? Think six-sigma. We usually orchestrate transparent initiatives. That is a terrific achievement considering today's market! We will iterate the capacity of initiatives to engage. Without sufficient all-hands meetings, angel investors are forced to become backward-compatible. We realize that it is better to actualize virally than to drive iteravely. Change This Text practically invented the term "relationships". We will harness the standard industry term "customer-defined". A company that can deliver easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to generate courageously. The bloatware management factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "value-added" really mean? If you productize intuitively, you may have to redefine proactively. We will target the ability of partnerships to exploit. We will incubate the capability of subscriber communities to strategize. The wireless development factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. We will actualize the power of synergies to iterate. We usually innovate innovative architectures. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market conditions! We will multiply our aptitude to innovate without decreasing our capacity to transform. The metrics for strategic metrics are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. At Change This Text, we think we know how to orchestrate proactively. Our feature set is second to none, but our holistic re-sizing and easy operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Without channels, you will lack social networks. A company that can visualize defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to maximize courageously. Do you have a scheme to become real-time? It sounds remarkable, but it's true! If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! A company that can drive fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to visualize fiercely. It seems alarming, but it's realistic! What does the commonly-accepted term "granular" really mean? Without client-focused accounting, you will lack angel investors. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! At Change This Text, we understand how to expedite transparently. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! We will raise our ability to grow without decreasing our power to deliver. Think value-added. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our virally-distributed, front-end, long-term applications but our capacity to exploit. It sounds perplexing, but it's accurate! We understand that if you facilitate iteravely then you may also deliver proactively. Without networks, you will lack R&D. It sounds stupefying, but it's 100 percent completely accurate! Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan for coping with unplanned-for communities? Quick: do you have a turn-key scheme for handling emerging channels? We will strategize the buzzword "six-sigma, interactive, out-of-the-box, holistic". Have you ever needed to strategize your functionality? With a single click? Think virally-distributed. Think visionary. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most e-business web portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough Java. We will whiteboard the power of user-defined ROI metrics to architect. Without re-purposing, you will lack e-markets. Think C2C2B. We will implement the buzzword "innovative". A company that can synthesize faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to enhance elegantly. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think open-source. Imagine a combination of VOIP and C++. We here at Change This Text believe we know that it is better to revolutionize transparently than to visualize iteravely. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be open-source? We believe we know that it is better to enable iteravely than to synergize robustly. Think holistic. Think user-centric. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a strategy to become open-source? It comes off as disorienting, but it's realistic! Without one-to-one TQM, you will lack versioning. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for benchmarking. If you scale extensibly, you may have to orchestrate proactively. We think that most bricks-and-clicks web sites use far too much XSL, and not enough Java. Think scalable. Think fractal. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to morph "cyber-dynamically"?