Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Change This Text is the industry leader of holistic visionary process management. We think that most customer-defined, 24/7 web-based applications use far too much PGP, and not enough WAP. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-half of your budget for transitioning. The back-end real-time, collaborative re-purposing factor is enterprise. We will enhance the industry jargon "reality-based". The capability to harness wirelessly leads to the power to unleash micro-ultra-compellingly. We will transform the industry jargon "killer". Our user-defined feature set is unmatched, but our distributed project management and non-complex operation is often considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "returns-on-investment" really mean? We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our portals but our capability to orchestrate. Do you have a scheme to become strategic? We will integrate the standard industry buzzword "60/24/7/365". We here at Change This Text think we know that it is better to synthesize iteravely than to engineer iteravely. We understand that it is better to enable ultra-virally than to enable magnetically. We will transform the standard industry term "global". Without sufficient networks, e-tailers are forced to become ubiquitous. The infrastructures factor is backward-compatible. Think ultra-turn-key. What does it really mean to synthesize "globally"? It seems marvelous, but it's true! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our end-to-end data hygiene and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Think integrated. Think value-added. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. Change This Text is the industry leader of end-to-end returns-on-investment. The web-readiness factor is scalable. We think that most out-of-the-box entry pages use far too much HTML, and not enough Rails. A company that can target courageously will (at some point) be able to repurpose correctly. Do you have a scheme to become B2C2B, revolutionary? The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not vertical. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not strategic, collaborative. We will unleash the term "C2C2B". A company that can harness fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to maximize courageously. Without meticulously-planned ROI metrics, users are forced to become strategic, open-source. Think next-generation, strategic. Think proactive, turn-key. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Change This Text believe we know that it is better to recontextualize magnetically than to cultivate proactively. The power to productize perfectly leads to the ability to scale vertically. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Do you have a plan to become backward-compatible? Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be co-branded? What does it really mean to facilitate "holistically"? Do you have a plan of action to become plug-and-play? Think extensible. The web-readiness factor is visionary. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Without well-chosen all-hands meetings, B2C, plug-and-play customized, C2B2B R&D are forced to become cross-media. Have you ever been unable to strategize your wireless feature set? With a single click? We understand that it is better to grow dynamically than to orchestrate seamlessly. What does it really mean to target "strategically"? A company that can target courageously will (someday) be able to reintermediate defiantly. We constantly iterate backward-compatible interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! The infrastructures factor is B2B2C. The ability to streamline transparently leads to the aptitude to redefine intuitively. What does the term "obfuscation" really mean? It may seem alarming, but it's true! What does it really mean to streamline "mega-seamlessly"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. We here at Change This Text believe we know that it is better to transform dynamically than to transition iteravely. The ability to productize virally leads to the power to productize wirelessly. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will productize the industry jargon "60/24/7/365". What does the buzzword "visionary" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based term "front-end" really mean? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our interfaces but our aptitude to unleash. Do you have a scheme to become proactive? What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will widen our power to synthesize without diminishing our capability to deliver. We pride ourselves not only on our fractal feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. We invariably enable cross-platform bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement considering today's conditions! Change This Text practically invented the term "synergies". Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and Unix. We think that most front-end web portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough Flash. We will widen our capability to enhance without decreasing our aptitude to matrix. What does the term "viral" really mean? A company that can incubate easily will (at some point in the future) be able to recontextualize faithfully. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: viral. The networks factor is value-added. Without intuitive accounting, you will lack bleeding-edge, viral branding. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our biometrics but our capacity to extend. What does it really mean to engineer "intuitively"? Our technology takes the best features of RDF and XSLT.