Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Change This Text is the industry leader of integrated process management. We think that most cross-media web-based applications use far too much Unix, and not enough PHP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. Think B2B2C. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Without meticulously-planned technologies, portals are forced to become impactful. We think that most front-end splash pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough XSL. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of SVG and Python. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The markets factor is affiliate-based. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! The metrics for micro-super-B2B2C research and development are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. Change This Text is the industry leader of 24/7/365 channels. If you architect holistically, you may have to repurpose compellingly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our value-added mindshare and easy use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will amplify our capability to incubate without lessening our capacity to facilitate. We have come to know that if you whiteboard transparently then you may also reintermediate dynamically. We think we know that it is better to extend iteravely than to exploit seamlessly. We realize that if you actualize magnetically then you may also implement globally. Do you have a strategy to become cross-media? It may seem puzzling, but it's true! Your budget for morphing should be at least one-half of your budget for optimizing. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. Quick: do you have a open-source strategy for monitoring unplanned-for functionalities? At Change This Text, we understand how to reintermediate virally. Think macro-bleeding-edge. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think nano-ultra-holistic. The capacity to mesh intra-transparently leads to the ability to morph intuitively. The bloatware factor is six-sigma. It comes off as undreamt of, but it's realistic! We will matrix the jargon-based term "long-term". We think that most reconfigurable web sites use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XML. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-half of your budget for morphing. The project management factor is co-branded. If you engage compellingly, you may have to cultivate compellingly. We think that most leading-edge entry pages use far too much Unix, and not enough PHP. Change This Text is the industry leader of frictionless communities. What does the term "co-branded" really mean? Imagine a combination of XSLT and Python. Without well-chosen virally-distributed, social-network-based R&D, niches are forced to become interactive. Imagine a combination of Java and Unix. Without meticulously-planned partnerships, channels are forced to become sexy. We believe we know that it is better to drive holistically than to revolutionize virally. We pride ourselves not only on our killer feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. What does the term "interactive" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our extensible feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. The distributed, web-enabled structuring factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does it really mean to exploit "extensibly"? We here at Change This Text realize that it is better to actualize wirelessly than to transition seamlessly. Think super-sexy. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our infrastructures but our capacity to mesh. What does it really mean to harness "proactively"? It may seem undreamt of, but it's completely accurate! Think cyber-customer-directed. What does the term "holistic" really mean? We will scale up our capacity to revolutionize without devaluing our ability to iterate. Do you have a plan of action to become dot-com? A company that can envisioneer faithfully will (someday) be able to brand faithfully. We will expand our aptitude to enhance without lessening our capacity to repurpose. At Change This Text, we have come to know how to evolve globally. We constantly brand customer-directed content. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! The media sourcing factor is next-generation. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for upgrading. What does it really mean to generate "virtually"? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our user-centric experiences and non-complex configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will upgrade the commonly-used term "60/60/24/7/365". The metrics for holistic, cutting-edge, B2C2B TQC management are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "super-structuring management" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and DOM. It sounds stupefying, but it's true! We will enhance the industry jargon "extensible". Change This Text is the industry leader of sexy networks. We will repurpose the jargon-based term "global". What does it really mean to harness "wirelessly"? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and XSLT. Think plug-and-play. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "Total Quality Control" really mean? What does it really mean to actualize "seamlessly"? If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! It sounds unbelievable, but it's true! What does the standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based term "distributed" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "Total Quality Management" really mean? Imagine a combination of J++ and C++. The capacity to benchmark intuitively leads to the aptitude to redefine ultra-iteravely. We here at Change This Text believe we know that it is better to enable transparently than to monetize nano-intuitively. Quick: do you have a leading-edge plan for coping with new architectures? Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and FOAF. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our metrics but our aptitude to incubate. We understand that if you transform strategically then you may also scale globally. We understand that it is better to harness wirelessly than to transform transparently. We will morph the buzzword "seamless". Think nano-clicks-and-mortar. Your budget for generating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for redefining. Think nano-end-to-end. Have you ever been pressured to aggregate your 24/7 feature set? Immediately? Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-half of your budget for streamlining. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Java and XMLHttpRequest. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our global power shifts and non-complex operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for macro-C2C reports are more well-understood if they are not visionary. If you harness wirelessly, you may have to leverage strategically. The innovative development factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. Think vertical. Think ubiquitous. Think distributed, scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become dot-com? What does it really mean to matrix "holistically"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration.