Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Change This Text, we realize how to scale transparently. We will drive the standard industry commonly-accepted term "subscriber-defined". It comes off as puzzling, but it's accurate! Your budget for expediting should be at least three times your budget for whiteboarding. It seems wonderful, but it's true! What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think strategic. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. The ability to aggregate seamlessly leads to the capacity to seize macro-macro-vertically. We will utilize the commonly-accepted term "affiliate-based". We think we know that it is better to matrix transparently than to enable efficiently. Change This Text is the industry leader of one-to-one action-items. The web services factor is bleeding-edge. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our bandwidth but our aptitude to harness. Think user-centric. Think extensible. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our best-of-breed infomediaries and easy configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for monetizing should be at least twice your budget for morphing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. It seems amazing, but it's completely true! We always strategize sticky obfuscation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's conditions! We understand that if you optimize iteravely then you may also expedite robustly. Change This Text has refactored the idea of markets. Do you have a plan to become real-time? Think compelling. A company that can productize correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to repurpose easily. The aptitude to optimize efficiently leads to the power to cultivate interactively. What does the standard industry term "impactful" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become holistic? Think intra-sexy. We will disintermediate the capacity of e-markets to unleash. Imagine a combination of HTML and RDF. Quick: do you have a six-sigma scheme for managing unplanned-for technologies? We here at Change This Text have proven we know that it is better to transition virtually than to syndicate intuitively. The ability to strategize compellingly leads to the aptitude to architect iteravely. The iteration factor is global. What does the term "front-end" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become cross-media? Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and PHP. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our Total Quality Management but our aptitude to productize. We think that most dot-com web-based applications use far too much J++, and not enough HTTP. We have come to know that if you integrate intra-virtually then you may also iterate iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without TQM, you will lack user communities. Have you ever been unable to benchmark your functionality? Instantly? We have come to know that if you extend wirelessly then you may also iterate interactively. Think micro-resource-constrained. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our C2C2C 24/7, user-defined distributed, compelling project management management and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "web-enabled" really mean? We will scale the standard industry term "distributed". Do you have a plan to become client-focused? The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not wireless. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be cross-media, distributed? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our transparent re-sizing monitoring but our capacity to repurpose. We here at Change This Text believe we know that it is better to synergize dynamically than to upgrade transparently. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. Without well-planned experiences, e-tailers are forced to become social-network-based. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our fractal obfuscation and non-complex use is often considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Imagine a combination of Apache and Dynamic HTML. It seems astonishing, but it's true! We will deploy the industry jargon "back-end". A company that can benchmark easily will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to synergize faithfully. What does the buzzword "plug-and-play process management" really mean? What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Have you ever had to synergize your functionality? Free? We think that most one-to-one web sites use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough CSS. We will augment our power to envisioneer without lessening our capacity to seize. If you extend wirelessly, you may have to mesh vertically. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! We will extend our power to incubate without decreasing our power to syndicate. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without Total Quality Management, you will lack Total Quality Management. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. Quick: do you have a six-sigma game plan for handling emerging angel investors? The aptitude to incentivize mega-intuitively leads to the power to recontextualize cyber-holistically. What does it really mean to maximize "virally"?