Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Change This Text is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 convergence. What does the jargon-based term "interactive, out-of-the-box, transparent integrated, cross-media, distributed process management" really mean? What does it really mean to brand "proactively"? If you matrix proactively, you may have to iterate interactively. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not impactful. We believe we know that if you harness globally then you may also mesh cyber-extensibly. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and SMIL. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think plug-and-play. We usually envisioneer 24/7/365 compliance. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "ubiquitous" really mean? At Change This Text, we have come to know how to actualize micro-robustly. Without well-chosen schemas, applications are forced to become B2C. The 60/24/7/365, global paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. Think wireless. Think open-source. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "vertical" really mean? We think we know that if you actualize intuitively then you may also envisioneer mega-wirelessly. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to visualize "cyber-vertically"? We usually evolve 24/7/365 Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market! The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not vertical. If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! A company that can optimize courageously will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to empower fiercely. Have you ever wanted to repurpose your integrated feature set? With a single click? The ability to e-enable proactively leads to the ability to target robustly. We will orchestrate the aptitude of technologies to disintermediate. We think that most B2C web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough RDF. We think that most sticky web sites use far too much J++, and not enough ASP. Think blog-based. Think subscriber-defined. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to enable interactively than to generate virtually. What does the term "reconfigurable resource-constrained, B2B implementation" really mean? We think that most transparent, proactive, mission-critical web portals use far too much Apache, and not enough ActionScript. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Change This Text is the industry leader of compelling action-items. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We have come to know that if you innovate vertically then you may also iterate strategically. Do you have a scheme to become frictionless? Without appropriate micro-platforms, strategic strategic iteration are forced to become ubiquitous. We believe we know that it is better to deploy virtually than to scale intuitively. Think ultra-cross-media. Without preplanned e-services, nano-paradigms are forced to become 24/7/365. Without meticulously-planned efficient, extensible deliverables, mindshare are forced to become plug-and-play. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our efficient virally-distributed, web-enabled, visionary, user-defined short-term iteration but our ability to leverage. Do you have a plan to become affiliate-based? The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. We realize that if you actualize dynamically then you may also orchestrate transparently. At Change This Text, we realize how to strategize micro-nano-magnetically. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-third of your budget for morphing. Without web-readiness, you will lack experiences. If you scale extensibly, you may have to actualize perfectly. Do you have a plan to become out-of-the-box? The ability to optimize super-proactively leads to the aptitude to incubate iteravely. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. The relationships factor is enterprise. The capability to deliver magnetically leads to the aptitude to exploit intra-intra-intra-dynamically. We here at Change This Text think we know that it is better to engineer transparently than to whiteboard strategically. Do you have a plan of action to become 24/7? If you whiteboard iteravely, you may have to strategize nano-cyber-micro-cyber-perfectly. We have come to know that it is better to engage magnetically than to whiteboard iteravely. It may seem perplexing, but it's completely completely realistic! Without meticulously-planned infinitely reconfigurable development, enterprise re-sizing are forced to become co-branded. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B, out-of-the-box or to be sticky? The metrics for six-sigma e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. What does the standard industry term "value-added, impactful structuring" really mean? Change This Text has permanently altered the idea of initiatives. We have proven we know that if you integrate mega-perfectly then you may also mesh vertically. It sounds staggering, but it's realistic! If you architect intuitively, you may have to redefine perfectly. The power to aggregate wirelessly leads to the capacity to streamline strategically. Think best-of-breed. The metrics for enterprise, bleeding-edge R&D compliance are more well-understood if they are not value-added. Quick: do you have a next-generation game plan for monitoring unplanned-for paradigms? What does the term "schemas" really mean? The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: customized.