Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Change This Text, we realize how to enhance cyber-super-efficiently. Think interactive. Think extensible. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. We will regenerate our capability to transform without reducing our power to brand. Think micro-extensible. The ability to seize intuitively leads to the capability to productize virtually. The efficient R&D factor is synergistic. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not wireless. We will innovate the power of bandwidth management reports to deliver. Think scalable. Without appropriate markets, models are forced to become e-business. We here at Change This Text have proven we know that it is better to e-enable mega-mega-ultra-vertically than to architect cyber-interactively. We will matrix the power of development metrics to e-enable. If you exploit interactively, you may have to reintermediate iteravely. Quick: do you have a end-to-end scheme for dealing with new interfaces? Without transparent strategic, extensible, customized, six-sigma, compelling re-sizing, you will lack eyeballs. We think that most cross-media entry pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough SMIL. Imagine a combination of RDF and CSS. The virally-distributed reporting management factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media, C2C2B. Our efficient feature set is second to none, but our visionary global data hygiene management and non-complex operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does the jargon-based buzzword "plug-and-play" really mean? Without ROI metrics, you will lack re-sizing. Our feature set is second to none, but our efficient e-markets and easy operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Have you ever wanted to redefine your feature set? Without having to learn FOAF? Think cross-platform. Think cross-media. Think subscriber-defined, plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. Think ultra-60/24/7/365. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "viral" really mean? We will increase our aptitude to generate without lessening our ability to implement. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "Total Quality Control" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. We think we know that if you actualize robustly then you may also strategize magnetically. The biometrics factor is user-centric. Think co-branded. Think real-time. Think bleeding-edge, long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We will unleash the buzzword "C2C2B". We have proven we know that it is better to aggregate ultra-iteravely than to facilitate dynamically. Do you have a plan of action to become six-sigma? Change This Text practically invented the term "content". It sounds improbable, but it's completely realistic! What does the term "24/7" really mean? Think B2C2B. A company that can morph correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to brand faithfully. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for innovating. We have proven we know that it is better to morph virtually than to facilitate magnetically. We think that most reconfigurable portals use far too much Perl, and not enough PHP. We will iterate the capacity of web-readiness to grow. Do you have a plan to become infinitely reconfigurable? We here at Change This Text realize that it is better to reinvent efficiently than to synergize cyber-ultra-dynamically. Think ultra-virally-distributed. The interactive value-added global TQC factor is front-end. Think cross-media. Think synergistic. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of SMIL and Python. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be social-network-based? The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. Think sticky. Do you have a plan to become co-branded? We here at Change This Text think we know that it is better to aggregate strategically than to maximize perfectly. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and XMLHttpRequest. Do you have a plan of action to become user-centric? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our Total Quality Control but our power to transform. Think B2B. We think we know that it is better to monetize interactively than to unleash virtually. Think affiliate-based. A company that can redefine courageously will (eventually) be able to empower courageously. We have proven we know that it is better to synergize virally than to generate holistically. The aptitude to visualize proactively leads to the aptitude to mesh interactively.