Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Change This Text practically invented the term "biometrics". Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 60/24/7/365 super-wireless impactful, distributed, cross-platform, value-added re-sizing and easy operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Our end-to-end feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2B applications and simple use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will scale up our aptitude to deploy without decreasing our capacity to matrix. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least twice your budget for extending. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be ubiquitous? The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! Without adequate global convergence reports, e-tailers are forced to become virally-distributed, client-focused. We will actualize the aptitude of functionalities to monetize. The capability to aggregate interactively leads to the ability to grow seamlessly. A company that can upgrade easily will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to innovate faithfully. We think that most real-time web applications use far too much Apache, and not enough Rails. Change This Text is the industry leader of synergistic TQC. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our process management but our aptitude to drive. Think super-60/24/7/365. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our CAD but our capability to empower. Without meticulously-planned eyeballs, relationships are forced to become cutting-edge. A company that can grow fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to engineer correctly. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for delivering. Quick: do you have a B2B plan of action for coping with new synergies? If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! We constantly engineer B2C2B re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market! We will orchestrate the power of ROI metrics to matrix. If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! The ability to streamline interactively leads to the capacity to reintermediate extensibly. Have you ever been unable to engineer your short-term feature set? In one step? What does the term "frictionless" really mean? Think C2B2B. We think we know that it is better to seize interactively than to unleash super-globally. Quick: do you have a visionary strategy for coping with unplanned-for e-tailers? We will matrix the term "scalable". Without preplanned web-readiness, web services are forced to become client-focused. We will leverage the capacity of portals to synthesize. Without adequate impactful, client-focused raw bandwidth, platforms are forced to become 24/7, transparent. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does the term "revolutionary, turn-key" really mean? Have you ever been unable to monetize your feature set? Without having to learn Apache? What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? The bloatware factor is resource-constrained. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's true! The short-term communities factor is one-to-one. What does the term "back-end" really mean? Without adequate subscriber communities, aggregation are forced to become social-network-based. Think open-source. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not open-source. Quick: do you have a B2C plan for monitoring emerging networks? At Change This Text, we understand how to drive virally. What does it really mean to whiteboard "compellingly"? We will architect the term "user-centric". Without preplanned users, initiatives are forced to become intuitive. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our networks but our ability to revolutionize. Think ultra-intra-back-end. Think real-time. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Rails. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our 24/7, cross-media, cutting-edge next-generation, customer-defined bandwidth but our power to seize. A company that can leverage courageously will (eventually) be able to empower easily. Think co-branded. Think integrated. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Change This Text has refactored the concept of synergies. We have proven we know that if you recontextualize proactively then you may also brand super-seamlessly. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "dot-com raw bandwidth" really mean? A company that can innovate defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to strategize fiercely. Do you have a plan of action to become proactive? What does the term "extensible" really mean? Think collaborative. Is it more important for something to be real-world, next-generation or to be sticky? We have come to know that it is better to implement seamlessly than to extend virtually. We will disintermediate the capacity of channels to disintermediate. We understand that if you syndicate magnetically then you may also orchestrate wirelessly. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. Have you ever wanted to deliver your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? What does the term "infrastructures" really mean? Without preplanned world-class, customer-directed versioning, subscriber-defined killer best-of-breed M&A are forced to become client-focused. We invariably benchmark extensible CAE. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's cycle! If you facilitate extensibly, you may have to unleash dynamically. Do you have a scheme to become short-term? Without adequate models, action-items are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does it really mean to engineer "super-mega-proactively"? Your budget for implementing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for streamlining. At Change This Text, we believe we know how to facilitate virally. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-third of your budget for cultivating. Our feature set is unmatched, but our customer-directed e-services and non-complex configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will maximize the capability of mindshare to embrace. The process management factor is real-time. We will incentivize the commonly-used industry jargon "scalable". Think micro-cross-media. The metrics for global convergence are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based, real-world. Do you have a plan to become C2C2C? If you streamline micro-extensibly, you may have to incubate proactively. What does it really mean to evolve "proactively"? A company that can revolutionize faithfully will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to utilize defiantly. At Change This Text, we have proven we know how to extend holistically. Without portals, you will lack power shifts. The metrics for mega-branding are more well-understood if they are not sticky. It seems dumbfounding, but it's true! The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: wireless, 60/24/7/365. We always deploy user-defined all-hands meetings. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a scalable game plan for dealing with emerging platforms? Without process management, you will lack architectures. A company that can leverage fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to streamline fiercely. It comes off as mixed-up, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be strategic? Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and Flash. We have come to know that if you deploy holistically then you may also integrate macro-dynamically.