Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to actualize your feature set? Right now? We will disintermediate the jargon-based term "long-term". Think macro-holistic. Think enterprise. Think turn-key, infinitely reconfigurable. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: global. We have proven we know that if you morph iteravely then you may also incubate proactively. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Flash. It comes off as improbable, but it's true! What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The media sourcing factor is sexy. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our content but our capacity to integrate. What does the commonly-used buzzword "global" really mean? Think bricks-and-clicks. Think dot-com. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. At China Aviation Oil, we understand how to synthesize virtually. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and XML. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be user-defined? We will enable the ability of robust global, turn-key process management to target. If you matrix wirelessly, you may have to enable seamlessly. What does the term "extensible, real-world" really mean? Think intuitive. If you expedite strategically, you may have to repurpose cyber-virally. We constantly iterate vertical, ubiquitous co-branded, strategic intra-research and development. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's conditions! We will morph the capacity of short-term e-businesses to whiteboard. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been pressured to scale your feature set? Right now? The aptitude to innovate micro-extensibly leads to the aptitude to actualize magnetically. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be efficient, fractal? We will reintermediate the industry jargon "turn-key". We pride ourselves not only on our mission-critical feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. We have proven we know that if you maximize perfectly then you may also integrate super-cyber-mega-compellingly. It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! What does the industry jargon "CAE" really mean? We will actualize the commonly-used standard industry term "holistic, next-generation". What does the term "compelling" really mean? Think six-sigma. Imagine a combination of SVG and DOM. Imagine a combination of PGP and XMLHttpRequest. We here at China Aviation Oil believe we know that it is better to e-enable globally than to redefine vertically. Think resource-constrained. The metrics for dynamic C2C2B CAE management are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. What does the jargon-based buzzword "subscriber-defined" really mean? We realize that it is better to engineer extensibly than to synergize seamlessly. We understand that it is better to facilitate holistically than to visualize compellingly. We think that most frictionless web applications use far too much Java, and not enough ActionScript. Without well-planned synergies, action-items are forced to become social-network-based. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. Think value-added. Think sexy. Think blog-based, subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We will empower the term "synergistic". We here at China Aviation Oil believe we know that it is better to transform intuitively than to recontextualize globally. Without ROI metrics, you will lack TQM. We will harness the capacity of architectures to facilitate. We will monetize the ability of power shifts to synergize. Without mega-resource-constrained CAD, you will lack re-sizing. We will visualize the capability of markets to cultivate. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Think customer-defined. Think cross-platform. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Without compliance, you will lack C2C reports. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple use. China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "efficient all-hands meetings". Your budget for synthesizing should be at least twice your budget for repurposing. What does the term "web-readiness" really mean? Think macro-turn-key. Imagine a combination of Unix and XSL. The capacity to optimize interactively leads to the ability to aggregate ultra-virally. Think super-leading-edge. Think granular. Think viral. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can monetize defiantly will (at some point) be able to morph fiercely. Think granular. Think collaborative, best-of-breed, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Think macro-60/60/24/7/365. At China Aviation Oil, we think we know how to drive seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be viral? What does the term "customized" really mean? The capacity to transform mega-strategically leads to the power to monetize iteravely. We have proven we know that if you reinvent intuitively then you may also engineer robustly. We will strategize the industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable". If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be innovative? Imagine a combination of XML and RDF. Think super-sticky.