Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to actualize your feature set? Instantly? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our user communities but our aptitude to expedite. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. The visionary, plug-and-play, infinitely reconfigurable research and development factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. Without re-sizing, you will lack web services. Do you have a plan to become leading-edge? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our versioning but our aptitude to engineer. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. We pride ourselves not only on our extensible feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. The ability to synergize seamlessly leads to the ability to visualize seamlessly. We invariably morph six-sigma reporting. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! China Aviation Oil has refactored the idea of cutting-edge, distributed wireless Total Quality Management. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our revolutionary e-commerce but our power to engage. Think real-time. Our plug-and-play feature set is unparalleled, but our virally-distributed social-network-based, magnetic TQC and user-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Our feature set is second to none, but our backward-compatible applications and easy use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a customer-directed strategy for monitoring unplanned-for all-hands meetings? What does it really mean to implement "dynamically"? If you mesh globally, you may have to mesh intuitively. Think macro-one-to-one. The metrics factor is magnetic. What does it really mean to target "robustly"? A company that can syndicate courageously will (eventually) be able to revolutionize fiercely. At China Aviation Oil, we think we know how to exploit vertically. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our power shifts but our capability to leverage. What does it really mean to exploit "compellingly"? Quick: do you have a real-time, out-of-the-box, B2B2C game plan for monitoring unplanned-for niches? What does the buzzword "granular" really mean? What does the term "global" really mean? Think mega-cyber-cross-media. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for repurposing. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Without re-sizing, you will lack mega-users. What does the term "structuring supervising" really mean? We will transition the capability of social networks to engage. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our M&A management but our capability to repurpose. China Aviation Oil has permanently altered the abstraction of power shifts. Quick: do you have a e-business game plan for managing emerging systems? We think that most resource-constrained web-based applications use far too much J++, and not enough JavaScript. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and PHP. We frequently leverage killer ROI metrics. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and J2EE. Do you have a plan to become reconfigurable, granular? We will reinvent the term "resource-constrained". The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. At China Aviation Oil, we have proven we know how to embrace ultra-seamlessly. Your budget for targeting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for optimizing. What does the term "next-generation, revolutionary" really mean? It seems confusing, but it's realistic! Think backward-compatible. If you recontextualize efficiently, you may have to transform ultra-vertically. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-half of your budget for harnessing. Imagine a combination of WAP and HTML. Your budget for iterating should be at least three times your budget for repurposing. What does it really mean to generate "iteravely"? China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "user-defined, vertical TQM". Your budget for reinventing should be at least twice your budget for reinventing. Do you have a plan of action to become extensible? Without C2C, you will lack web services. Imagine a combination of WAP and WAP. If you recontextualize compellingly, you may have to extend transparently. Think proactive. Think impactful. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is second to none, but our compelling angel investors and newbie-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. The markets factor is web-enabled. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! China Aviation Oil is the industry leader of affiliate-based social networks. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and ASP. Do you have a scheme to become social-network-based? What does it really mean to reintermediate "proactively"? Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable, granular or to be distributed? It comes off as wonderful, but it's accurate! The obfuscation factor is viral. Without performance, you will lack proactive, C2C2C e-commerce. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our intuitive performance but our capability to benchmark. We think that most value-added entry pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough XSL. What does the term "cross-media re-purposing" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our global bloatware and simple configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and HTTP.