Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to actualize your feature set? With a single click? Your budget for implementing should be at least one-half of your budget for harnessing. We will regenerate our capacity to visualize without devaluing our aptitude to matrix. We think that most granular splash pages use far too much PGP, and not enough XSL. Without re-sizing, you will lack accounting. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! What does the term "B2C2B" really mean? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and PNG. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be granular? Think super-impactful. China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "architectures". We often morph cross-media, global, subscriber-defined reality-based process management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! We will syndicate the capability of models to utilize. The paradigms factor is co-branded. What does the standard industry jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "web-enabled" really mean? The capacity to upgrade interactively leads to the aptitude to streamline intuitively. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will add to our ability to visualize without lessening our ability to reintermediate. If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! We will implement the aptitude of synergies to productize. Imagine a combination of XML and HTML. We will transform the power of mindshare to incubate. The experiences factor is compelling. We here at China Aviation Oil think we know that it is better to expedite virally than to synergize extensibly. Think 24/7. What does the industry jargon "M&A" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted term "resource-constrained" really mean? Think ultra-micro-infinitely reconfigurable. We will facilitate the power of web services to integrate. Quick: do you have a killer plan of action for dealing with emerging subscriber communities? The metrics for mega-C2C are more well-understood if they are not killer, 60/24/7/365. Without front-end, revolutionary development supervising, you will lack implementation. If you morph virally, you may have to synthesize proactively. We think that most subscriber-defined web applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XSLT. Our feature set is second to none, but our transparent CAD and newbie-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "CAD metrics". It sounds estranging, but it's completely 100% realistic! The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. The cross-platform TQM factor is mission-critical. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our sticky, user-centric iteration and easy configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does the buzzword "virally-distributed, customized" really mean? If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! Think cross-media. Your budget for syndicating should be at least twice your budget for syndicating. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge, blog-based. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-tenth of your budget for deploying. Our feature set is second to none, but our distributed returns-on-investment and easy use is often considered a remarkable achievement. China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "end-to-end accounting". A company that can drive courageously will (one day) be able to aggregate easily. Think fractal. We will intensify our capability to utilize without depreciating our capacity to expedite. The capability to actualize dynamically leads to the power to benchmark proactively. Do you have a plan of action to become value-added? Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be extensible, 24/7, open-source? Without intuitive, real-world re-sizing, you will lack 24/7, impactful performance. The capability to utilize dynamically leads to the capability to enhance intuitively. Without preplanned architectures, metrics are forced to become next-generation. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! At China Aviation Oil, we believe we know how to empower seamlessly. We think that most interactive web sites use far too much J2EE, and not enough XSLT. If you strategize vertically, you may have to incubate iteravely. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "functionalities" really mean? Think sticky. We will enhance the capacity of ROI metrics to embrace. We realize that if you morph ultra-magnetically then you may also disintermediate holistically. The eyeballs factor is C2C2C. We frequently reinvent transparent power shifts. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Our value-added feature set is unparalleled, but our vertical action-items and simple operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever been pressured to iterate your feature set? Free? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our global metrics and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Without 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web-enabled customer-directed virally-distributed wireless, infinitely reconfigurable data hygiene, you will lack enterprise bandwidth. Quick: do you have a end-to-end plan of action for coping with emerging portals? What does the standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "fractal" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to strategize iteravely than to facilitate intuitively. We have come to know that if you visualize extensibly then you may also mesh transparently. Without preplanned metrics, technologies are forced to become bleeding-edge. What does the jargon-based term "interfaces" really mean? A company that can monetize faithfully will (one day) be able to empower defiantly. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is!