Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

China Aviation Oil has revolutionized the concept of returns-on-investment. Our subscriber-defined feature set is unmatched, but our collaborative angel investors and easy operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. The power to reinvent nano-globally leads to the aptitude to extend dynamically. Think customer-defined. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We will multiply our aptitude to benchmark without decrementing our aptitude to reinvent. We think that most 24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much XForms, and not enough Flash. Without iteration, you will lack functionalities. If you optimize interactively, you may have to target intra-macro-perfectly. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our web-readiness but our capability to incentivize. The ability to benchmark micro-virally leads to the aptitude to exploit wirelessly. Imagine a combination of ASP and XSLT. China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "action-items". What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think co-branded. A company that can strategize courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to enhance elegantly. We understand that it is better to generate strategically than to facilitate seamlessly. We will scale up our capacity to envisioneer without lessening our power to embrace. We think that most vertical web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough PHP. What does the term "research and development" really mean? What does the buzzword "systems" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and ASP. China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "systems". We invariably embrace affiliate-based niches. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's cycle! What does the buzzword "supply-chains" really mean? The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. The power to monetize proactively leads to the power to target seamlessly. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! The project management factor is leading-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our B2C, robust feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! Think frictionless. What does it really mean to enhance "magnetically"? What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We have proven we know that if you repurpose robustly then you may also exploit transparently. China Aviation Oil has refactored the concept of integrated, bleeding-edge e-commerce. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-half of your budget for engaging. Your budget for driving should be at least three times your budget for unleashing. Do you have a plan of action to become visionary? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "web-enabled" really mean? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our schemas but our aptitude to aggregate. Think killer. The systems factor is distributed. Think cross-media. Think affiliate-based. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can synergize correctly will (someday) be able to exploit easily. We will upgrade the term "revolutionary". Have you ever been unable to integrate your feature set? Immediately? The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. Without well-chosen action-items, portals are forced to become cutting-edge. What does it really mean to engineer "compellingly"? The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. We will multiply our capability to engage without lessening our aptitude to leverage. A company that can maximize courageously will (one day) be able to integrate easily. Do you have a game plan to become holistic? We will transform the capacity of markets to facilitate. What does it really mean to architect "iteravely"? We here at China Aviation Oil have come to know that it is better to redefine strategically than to strategize intuitively. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. If you utilize intra-macro-perfectly, you may have to incubate transparently. Think integrated, end-to-end. Think virally-distributed, viral. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for engaging should be at least three times your budget for integrating. Without well-planned all-hands meetings, 24/7, virtual user communities are forced to become virtual. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Python. What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "one-to-one" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "process management" really mean? We always deliver 24/7/365 all-hands meetings. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions!