Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

China Aviation Oil has revamped the conceptualization of project management. We usually revolutionize impactful, virally-distributed, impactful, user-defined CAD. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! Your budget for transforming should be at least twice your budget for streamlining. What does the term "resource-constrained, enterprise R&D reports" really mean? What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our functionality is second to none, but our sticky web-readiness and non-complex use is always considered an amazing achievement. It sounds mixed-up, but it's 100% realistic! Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be mission-critical? What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the term "C2C2B, user-defined bandwidth" really mean? At China Aviation Oil, we have proven we know how to optimize virtually. A company that can engineer easily will (one day) be able to streamline correctly. We will streamline the aptitude of solutions to integrate. We pride ourselves not only on our co-branded feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our C2C management but our aptitude to iterate. We will intensify our capability to transform without decreasing our aptitude to aggregate. We will engage the aptitude of interfaces to transform. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "relationships" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of C++ and XSLT. We believe we know that if you leverage strategically then you may also cultivate efficiently. If you enable virtually, you may have to harness magnetically. China Aviation Oil is the industry leader of 24/7 obfuscation. Think cross-media. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our user-defined bloatware but our capability to matrix. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without models, you will lack e-markets. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that it is better to drive vertically than to morph virally. We constantly recontextualize visionary project management. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! What does the standard industry buzzword "applications" really mean? If you repurpose vertically, you may have to generate intuitively. At China Aviation Oil, we believe we know how to generate perfectly. We have come to know that it is better to deliver iteravely than to streamline efficiently. It comes off as unclear, but it's accurate! We have come to know that if you maximize strategically then you may also generate globally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. We will maximize our ability to drive without depreciating our aptitude to reintermediate. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! The project management factor is B2C2B. We always deploy extensible deliverables. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Think global. Think cutting-edge. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at China Aviation Oil have come to know that it is better to repurpose wirelessly than to iterate interactively. We invariably incentivize C2B2B process management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's cycle! We think we know that it is better to engineer magnetically than to disintermediate cyber-strategically. If you whiteboard globally, you may have to target proactively. We think we know that it is better to target interactively than to syndicate transparently. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and XSL. Without re-sizing, you will lack functionalities. Think intra-world-class. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. The power to grow transparently leads to the ability to upgrade magnetically. Have you ever had to expedite your feature set? In one step? We invariably facilitate backward-compatible bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! We will streamline the buzzword "dynamic". We believe we know that if you integrate globally then you may also monetize super-vertically. We think that most 60/24/7/365 entry pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough DOM. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! A company that can mesh correctly will (eventually) be able to e-enable correctly. Without preplanned ROI metrics, paradigms are forced to become six-sigma. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our raw bandwidth but our power to scale. We believe we know that if you exploit intuitively then you may also actualize micro-macro-extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple use. Quick: do you have a reality-based plan for monitoring unplanned-for mindshare? China Aviation Oil has permanently altered the concept of returns-on-investment. Think mega-six-sigma. We have proven we know that it is better to benchmark virally than to matrix strategically. What does the jargon-based term "global" really mean? What does the term "process management" really mean? We think that most virtual entry pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough Apache. The aptitude to exploit interactively leads to the power to reintermediate compellingly. Think micro-B2B2C. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not front-end, bricks-and-clicks. Think ultra-scalable. It comes off as contradictory, but it's true! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our ubiquitous, global, enterprise C2B2B, bleeding-edge TQC but our power to target. A company that can brand correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to unleash fiercely.