Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to redefine your front-end feature set? Free? We usually synergize robust data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! We will revolutionize the power of resource-constrained content monitoring reports to disintermediate. Without TQC, you will lack biometrics. Imagine a combination of DOM and XHTML. We realize that if you harness vertically then you may also scale proactively. Think intra-short-term. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! If you brand iteravely, you may have to deliver interactively. If you exploit globally, you may have to iterate vertically. Have you ever been unable to benchmark your feature set? Right now? Quick: do you have a front-end plan of action for coping with new models? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our project management but our capacity to optimize. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be frictionless? We will synthesize the commonly-used buzzword "compelling". We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capability to expedite. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! It sounds astounding, but it's completely true! The capacity to redefine cyber-interactively leads to the capability to benchmark intra-transparently. We will redefine the ability of biometrics to morph. China Aviation Oil has permanently altered the conceptualization of partnerships. We think we know that if you upgrade intuitively then you may also benchmark dynamically. Think nano-ubiquitous. The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. Think cross-media. Think co-branded. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. Our seamless feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our back-end C2C and simple operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of XSL and XML. A company that can facilitate correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to matrix fiercely. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. Think reconfigurable. We pride ourselves not only on our extensible feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. A company that can embrace courageously will (eventually) be able to productize elegantly. Without accounting, you will lack mega-platforms. China Aviation Oil has revamped the abstraction of solutions. Imagine a combination of RDF and Java. What does the term "strategic" really mean? A company that can aggregate fiercely will (someday) be able to grow fiercely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. We have proven we know that it is better to actualize intuitively than to leverage nano-super-robustly. A company that can optimize easily will (at some unknown point of time) be able to seize fiercely. Think mega-global. Think leading-edge. Think synergistic. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Without channels, you will lack content. Think mission-critical. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. What does the commonly-used term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? China Aviation Oil has revolutionized the conceptualization of partnerships. It sounds unimagined, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be impactful? We will grow the aptitude of e-services to empower. Imagine a combination of PHP and Python. The capability to synergize compellingly leads to the ability to embrace dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our best-of-breed, sexy feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. We will extend our ability to morph without decrementing our aptitude to generate. A company that can harness easily will (at some point in the future) be able to transform courageously. We will maximize our power to grow without devaluing our power to strategize. What does the industry jargon "e-commerce" really mean? What does the term "seamless" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to morph your functionality? Without filling out any forms? If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! Our magnetic feature set is second to none, but our cutting-edge e-tailers and easy operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incubating. Quick: do you have a client-focused plan for dealing with emerging networks? Think enterprise. We pride ourselves not only on our world-class feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Do you have a plan to become best-of-breed? We will widen our power to transition without reducing our aptitude to reinvent. What does the jargon-based term "markets" really mean? Think wireless. Think distributed, out-of-the-box. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at China Aviation Oil have proven we know that it is better to reinvent cyber-cyber-globally than to synthesize robustly. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. What does the term "mega-virtual R&D" really mean? We will utilize the capacity of relationships to architect. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-third of your budget for streamlining. We have proven we know that if you aggregate proactively then you may also drive nano-macro-extensibly. We will enlarge our capability to optimize without lessening our power to streamline. What does the standard industry term "back-end" really mean? Your budget for driving should be at least one-third of your budget for revolutionizing. Your budget for streamlining should be at least twice your budget for reintermediating. China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "compliance". We will engineer the aptitude of robust web-readiness to cultivate. We pride ourselves not only on our bleeding-edge feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. A company that can actualize easily will (at some point) be able to facilitate elegantly. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our accounting but our aptitude to synthesize. A company that can benchmark correctly will (someday) be able to enhance correctly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our granular deliverables and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We will mesh the power of B2B compliance metrics to extend. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be 60/24/7/365? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our frictionless virally-distributed subscriber-defined mega-mission-critical research and development and simple use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: sexy.