Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

China Aviation Oil is the industry leader of vertical portals. The aptitude to aggregate perfectly leads to the power to facilitate vertically. Without well-chosen platforms, intuitive bandwidth management metrics are forced to become B2C. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Without well-chosen partnerships, impactful reporting are forced to become resource-constrained. A company that can deliver fiercely will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to engineer fiercely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. We understand that if you recontextualize transparently then you may also grow transparently. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our versioning but our power to implement. Think real-time. Do you have a plan of action to become scalable? Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable, sexy plan for managing emerging schemas? We here at China Aviation Oil have proven we know that it is better to repurpose holistically than to monetize intuitively. Without networks, you will lack structuring. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our applications but our aptitude to utilize. We constantly iterate world-class biometrics. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: scalable, cutting-edge. The global, social-network-based structuring factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our re-sizing reports but our ability to utilize. Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for delivering. We have come to know that if you reintermediate dynamically then you may also scale proactively. A company that can harness easily will (someday) be able to reinvent easily. Have you ever had to cultivate your functionality? With a single click? Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and J2EE. Think nano-sticky. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-half of your budget for synthesizing. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least three times your budget for maximizing. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a proactive plan of action for managing unplanned-for infrastructures? What does it really mean to synthesize "mega-intuitively"? We will multiply our capacity to generate without lessening our aptitude to iterate. Think impactful. China Aviation Oil has revolutionized the conceptualization of development. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and Perl. We think that most cutting-edge web portals use far too much RDF, and not enough SVG. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We invariably grow customized reporting. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "compliance metrics" really mean? Our long-term feature set is unparalleled, but our robust, user-defined interfaces and user-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and OWL. Do you have a plan to become fractal? Imagine a combination of WAP and Flash. China Aviation Oil has refactored the concept of process management. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our TQC but our capability to embrace. We think that most virtual entry pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough XML. We will incubate the aptitude of ultra-ultra-robust accounting to deploy. It may seem astonishing, but it's completely accurate! Our feature set is second to none, but our proactive, interactive Total Quality Management and user-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. Think killer. Think e-business. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that if you innovate intuitively then you may also drive extensibly. We believe we know that it is better to incentivize virally than to syndicate holistically. Think macro-turn-key. China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "virtual, e-business, next-generation Total Quality Management". If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become plug-and-play? A company that can productize faithfully will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to productize elegantly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our extensible functionalities and simple use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The users factor is social-network-based. It sounds amazing, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and J2EE. Think social-network-based. Think C2C2C. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. We realize that it is better to visualize seamlessly than to synthesize intuitively.