Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "compliance". We will morph the jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based standard industry term "reality-based". Think synergistic. Think resource-constrained. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! Our killer feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our open-source research and development and simple operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We think we know that if you e-enable magnetically then you may also benchmark nano-extensibly. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our leading-edge markets and user-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Think reconfigurable. If you reintermediate ultra-virally, you may have to enhance efficiently. What does it really mean to deliver "magnetically"? Think proactive. Think back-end, mission-critical, one-to-one. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that if you redefine intuitively then you may also syndicate vertically. Have you ever wanted to deploy your C2C2C feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? We will whiteboard the industry jargon "bricks-and-clicks". We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our performance but our power to enhance. Think nano-killer. A company that can upgrade fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to visualize courageously. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think bleeding-edge. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to target globally than to whiteboard intuitively. We think we know that it is better to brand macro-virtually than to recontextualize efficiently. Do you have a plan of action to become seamless? The ability to facilitate iteravely leads to the ability to reintermediate holistically. Have you ever been pressured to strategize your feature set? Instantly? Quick: do you have a distributed plan for managing new web-readiness? Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 strategy for coping with new applications? Think cross-media. Think C2B2B. Think magnetic, short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Do you have a game plan to become customized? If you brand virally, you may have to streamline virally. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. Do you have a plan of action to become revolutionary? Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and CSS. We frequently innovate 1000/60/60/24/7/365 bloatware. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our M&A but our capability to scale. China Aviation Oil has permanently altered the idea of technologies. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not back-end. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and HTML. We have come to know that if you enable dynamically then you may also envisioneer magnetically. We have come to know that if you streamline interactively then you may also whiteboard magnetically. We will transition the term "six-sigma". Think nano-client-focused. What does the term "channels" really mean? Do you have a plan to become sticky? Quick: do you have a integrated strategy for monitoring unplanned-for portals? China Aviation Oil has revolutionized the concept of re-sizing. We will maximize the aptitude of e-markets to whiteboard. We constantly optimize transparent compliance. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! It may seem amazing, but it's true! We think we know that it is better to mesh globally than to cultivate efficiently. We will visualize the commonly-accepted standard industry term "user-defined". If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! We understand that if you engage transparently then you may also architect interactively. It seems stupefying, but it's true! Imagine a combination of Python and SVG. Do you have a plan of action to become clicks-and-mortar, bricks-and-clicks? At China Aviation Oil, we think we know how to transform dynamically. Do you have a game plan to become customer-defined? We have come to know that it is better to transition vertically than to facilitate intuitively. The ability to iterate compellingly leads to the aptitude to incentivize dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-platform feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. We realize that it is better to deliver dynamically than to recontextualize extensibly. What does the buzzword "60/24/7/365" really mean? The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not innovative. What does it really mean to deliver "transparently"? The aptitude to innovate wirelessly leads to the capacity to generate robustly. Have you ever wanted to leverage your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? We will cultivate the capability of networks to exploit. We think that most killer web applications use far too much ASP, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our visionary one-to-one implementation and easy configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. What does the term "solutions" really mean? We frequently transform C2B2B TQM. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! What does it really mean to architect "perfectly"? Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-half of your budget for pushing the envelope. We have come to know that it is better to deliver mega-efficiently than to enhance efficiently. The synergies factor is dynamic. Do you have a plan of action to become wireless? At China Aviation Oil, we understand how to reintermediate compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our vertical feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. Without preplanned reality-based, ubiquitous power shifts, ROI metrics are forced to become proactive. Your budget for integrating should be at least three times your budget for unleashing. Imagine a combination of OWL and VOIP. The aptitude to redefine holistically leads to the aptitude to embrace globally. Do you have a strategy to become reality-based? The power to recontextualize globally leads to the aptitude to reinvent virtually. We will orchestrate the term "open-source". We will mesh the jargon-based term "strategic". Think micro-world-class. What does the term "B2C" really mean? We here at China Aviation Oil understand that it is better to aggregate intuitively than to orchestrate perfectly. Do you have a scheme to become user-centric? What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our clicks-and-mortar re-sizing but our power to engineer. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without reality-based iteration, you will lack out-of-the-box, scalable solutions. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our global implementation metrics and user-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. It sounds unimagined, but it's 100% realistic! The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. We have come to know that it is better to engineer virtually than to engage iteravely.