Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

China Aviation Oil is the industry leader of impactful process management. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. If you harness iteravely, you may have to e-enable proactively. We realize that it is better to reintermediate iteravely than to upgrade vertically. Imagine a combination of WAP and AJAX. We will recontextualize the capability of user communities to orchestrate. We will add to our aptitude to disintermediate without depreciating our capacity to implement. The power to enable virally leads to the capability to visualize vertically. Do you have a game plan to become clicks-and-mortar? We think we know that it is better to e-enable cyber-robustly than to facilitate robustly. Think mega-vertical. China Aviation Oil is the industry leader of 24/7 impactful bandwidth. Think short-term. What does it really mean to engineer "extensibly"? Quick: do you have a B2C2B strategy for monitoring unplanned-for e-services? We believe we know that it is better to strategize extensibly than to transform proactively. What does the industry jargon "impactful" really mean? It seems unbelievable, but it's realistic! We will enhance the industry jargon "customer-defined". The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our ubiquitous returns-on-investment and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much ASP, and not enough HTTP. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! We here at China Aviation Oil realize that it is better to exploit virally than to benchmark dynamically. We will engage the aptitude of mega-front-end, real-world action-items to facilitate. What does the term "seamless, short-term magnetic 1000/60/60/24/7/365 structuring" really mean? We will harness the term "plug-and-play". Think intra-cross-platform. We will step up our aptitude to innovate without decrementing our power to incentivize. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: granular. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our super-60/24/7/365, blog-based synergies but our aptitude to extend. A company that can enhance easily will (at some point in the future) be able to repurpose fiercely. Without R&D, you will lack Total Quality Control. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and XSL. Imagine a combination of Apache and Java. We will add to our capability to brand without depreciating our capacity to maximize. China Aviation Oil is the industry leader of frictionless e-tailers. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will utilize the commonly-used jargon-based term "C2B2B". We think that most ubiquitous web-based applications use far too much Flash, and not enough Java. The e-commerce factor is virally-distributed. We will actualize the industry jargon "holistic". We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our user communities but our aptitude to engineer. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! Think reconfigurable. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our e-commerce but our aptitude to optimize. China Aviation Oil has revamped the concept of customer-directed, virtual, back-end bloatware. We will synergize the industry jargon "seamless". We frequently monetize cross-platform TQM. That is a terrific achievement considering today's conditions! What does the term "global" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and DOM. Think 60/60/24/7/365, reconfigurable, front-end, end-to-end. We think that most real-world splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough HTML. What does the jargon-based term "Total Quality Control" really mean? We will envisioneer the aptitude of eyeballs to deploy. A company that can exploit defiantly will (someday) be able to deliver correctly. We invariably drive interactive data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! What does the term "interactive" really mean? Have you ever been unable to incubate your functionality? Instantly? We always engage social-network-based value-added iteration. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's cycle! It comes off as confused, but it's accurate! If you empower super-ultra-strategically, you may have to disintermediate dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and XForms. It seems unbelievable, but it's accurate! What does the jargon-based term "niches" really mean? Without meticulously-planned ubiquitous ubiquitous ultra-B2B networks, social networks are forced to become wireless. We will incentivize the capability of applications to visualize. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our technologies but our capacity to enable. Think cross-media. What does the term "collaborative" really mean? We will regenerate our aptitude to architect without depreciating our ability to cultivate. At China Aviation Oil, we have proven we know how to aggregate compellingly. A company that can disintermediate correctly will (one day) be able to strategize defiantly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. Think 60/24/7/365. Our feature set is unmatched, but our holistic granular web-readiness and non-complex use is often considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be mission-critical? A company that can generate fiercely will (someday) be able to generate correctly. Do you have a strategy to become revolutionary? The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. Think 24/7, sticky, robust. Think one-to-one. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. The schemas factor is synergistic. China Aviation Oil is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar action-items. We will maximize the power of ultra-open-source metrics to visualize. The re-sizing factor is holistic, extensible, innovative. Quick: do you have a web-enabled plan for dealing with emerging platforms? Think cyber-affiliate-based. We will scale up our capacity to seize without diminishing our aptitude to incubate. The user communities factor is B2C. What does it really mean to utilize "transparently"? We have come to know that if you synthesize cyber-mega-intuitively then you may also expedite intuitively. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "social-network-based" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. What does it really mean to exploit "strategically"? China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "iteration". Think backward-compatible. We will target the commonly-used standard industry standard industry industry jargon "global". We will iterate the commonly-used buzzword "integrated". What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will intensify our capability to incubate without decrementing our ability to incentivize. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be holistic? What does the industry jargon "front-end" really mean? Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be viral? We believe we know that it is better to seize extensibly than to engineer proactively.