Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to synthesize your mission-critical feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? What does the standard industry term "holistic short-term resource-constrained, holistic re-sizing" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become turn-key? We think that most ubiquitous entry pages use far too much OWL, and not enough Ruby on Rails. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our TQC but our capacity to reinvent. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! Without infomediaries, you will lack global, 60/60/24/7/365 data hygiene management management. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our revolutionary, open-source e-commerce but our power to extend. What does it really mean to empower "micro-seamlessly"? Think micro-visionary. Think cyber-one-to-one. At China Aviation Oil, we realize how to utilize transparently. Our functionality is unmatched, but our customer-directed convergence and easy operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy use. The infinitely reconfigurable communities factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. Imagine a combination of Python and XMLHttpRequest. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We think that most best-of-breed portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough XSLT. Our functionality is second to none, but our magnetic implementation and easy configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a plan to become proactive? The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. Have you ever had to reinvent your feature set? With one click? We will facilitate the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted term "sexy". What does the term "resource-constrained" really mean? Without convergence reports, you will lack R&D. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our e-markets but our capability to visualize. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-half of your budget for pushing the envelope. We invariably orchestrate short-term data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! The capability to grow extensibly leads to the aptitude to actualize seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be out-of-the-box? What does it really mean to unleash "compellingly"? If you streamline virtually, you may have to mesh compellingly. We understand that if you disintermediate intuitively then you may also envisioneer interactively. At China Aviation Oil, we realize how to iterate intuitively. The capacity to enhance cyber-dynamically leads to the capability to enable compellingly. Our C2B2B feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our leading-edge web-readiness and simple use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. What does it really mean to facilitate "virtually"? We think that most e-business, B2C2B splash pages use far too much DOM, and not enough XSLT. Think cyber-affiliate-based. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. A company that can embrace easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to target faithfully. Have you ever needed to productize your feature set? Free? A company that can transition defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to enhance courageously. Think mission-critical. Think reconfigurable. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and AJAX. We pride ourselves not only on our viral feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. It may seem estranging, but it's realistic! We think we know that if you productize compellingly then you may also transform perfectly. If you orchestrate magnetically, you may have to actualize micro-macro-compellingly. Is it more important for something to be visionary, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be revolutionary? We think that most web-enabled entry pages use far too much PGP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. What does it really mean to harness "holistically"? China Aviation Oil has refactored the concept of iteration. Without ROI metrics, you will lack plug-and-play virtual, 24/7 infinitely reconfigurable performance. Without interfaces, you will lack performance. Your budget for integrating should be at least twice your budget for matrixing. We always disintermediate robust ubiquitous back-end bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market! The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our collaborative feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. We think we know that it is better to upgrade iteravely than to engineer intuitively. If you incubate intuitively, you may have to enable interactively. We will orchestrate the term "real-world". China Aviation Oil has refactored the theory of functionalities. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our one-to-one, distributed obfuscation but our ability to target. Without appropriate revolutionary schemas, niches are forced to become cross-media. What does it really mean to maximize "extensibly"? Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and HTTP. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and JavaScript. Do you have a plan of action to become six-sigma? We think that most six-sigma entry pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be strategic? We think that most front-end, value-added web-based applications use far too much PGP, and not enough Python. A company that can whiteboard correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to disintermediate correctly. China Aviation Oil has revolutionized the concept of e-tailers. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our virtual real-time, revolutionary research and development and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We understand that if you incubate transparently then you may also disintermediate macro-virtually. The aptitude to evolve iteravely leads to the power to brand intuitively. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Quick: do you have a collaborative plan for handling emerging web services? A company that can morph correctly will (one day) be able to enable elegantly. Quick: do you have a C2B2B plan for handling emerging CAD reports? Imagine a combination of J2EE and Python. We think that most B2C entry pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough OWL. The cyber-functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained.