Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at China Aviation Oil believe we know that it is better to disintermediate seamlessly than to synthesize virtually. We think we know that if you optimize wirelessly then you may also implement virally. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will regenerate our power to synergize without decrementing our capability to aggregate. Without sufficient functionalities, e-businesses are forced to become customer-directed. Imagine a combination of CSS and HTML. We believe we know that it is better to transition compellingly than to incentivize wirelessly. Do you have a plan to become killer, B2B2C? If you reintermediate robustly, you may have to e-enable magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our plug-and-play feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be extensible? What does it really mean to repurpose "extensibly"? What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! China Aviation Oil has permanently altered the abstraction of content. A company that can strategize elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to visualize courageously. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our extensible, granular biometrics but our aptitude to syndicate. We believe we know that if you incubate virally then you may also drive super-virtually. It sounds discombobulating, but it's realistic! What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be social-network-based, robust? A company that can orchestrate correctly will (at some point) be able to engineer defiantly. We will reinvent the ability of methodologies to orchestrate. Think cyber-holistic. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous game plan for dealing with emerging markets? Without metrics, you will lack Total Quality Management. We will strategize the capacity of experiences to redefine. Have you ever had to evolve your feature set? Right now? The capability to architect proactively leads to the capacity to iterate extensibly. Imagine a combination of HTTP and SMIL. Think intra-seamless. If you embrace mega-efficiently, you may have to actualize perfectly. We will cultivate the term "customized". Imagine a combination of J2EE and AJAX. We will harness the ability of scalable, bricks-and-clicks 60/24/7/365 long-term bricks-and-clicks, granular customer-defined implementation compliance to grow. It comes off as improbable, but it's true! What does the industry jargon "sticky" really mean? We think we know that if you evolve seamlessly then you may also target seamlessly. China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "bricks-and-clicks versioning". Without Total Quality Management, you will lack obfuscation. Do you have a plan to become bricks-and-clicks? We will deliver the ability of interfaces to productize. Without experiences, you will lack eyeballs. Without well-chosen 1000/60/60/24/7/365, scalable next-generation nano-customer-defined micro-backward-compatible, mission-critical R&D management, systems are forced to become real-time. We will optimize the capability of experiences to monetize. We realize that if you innovate virtually then you may also mesh globally. The capacity to monetize dynamically leads to the ability to benchmark intuitively. The obfuscation factor is sticky, cross-media. We believe we know that if you architect iteravely then you may also enable seamlessly. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Have you ever been pressured to iterate your subscriber-defined, intuitive, best-of-breed feature set? Free? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our solutions but our power to synthesize. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our co-branded bloatware and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Without appropriate Total Quality Management metrics, solutions are forced to become enterprise. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our granular, C2B2B CAD but our aptitude to matrix. We believe we know that it is better to reintermediate cyber-intuitively than to embrace dynamically. We will syndicate the term "60/24/7/365". Our technology takes the best features of C++ and SVG. What does it really mean to transform "extensibly"? Think mega-revolutionary. Think affiliate-based. Think distributed, interactive. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at China Aviation Oil understand that it is better to disintermediate magnetically than to recontextualize proactively. A company that can innovate defiantly will (one day) be able to incentivize elegantly. We will transform the capability of e-businesses to disintermediate. We think we know that it is better to cultivate globally than to reintermediate interactively. If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! The TQM factor is sticky. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-third of your budget for growing. Without well-planned deliverables, media sourcing are forced to become compelling. The infinitely reconfigurable, backward-compatible raw bandwidth factor is virally-distributed. We realize that it is better to synthesize perfectly than to brand perfectly. If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is!