Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At China Aviation Oil, we have proven we know how to aggregate wirelessly. We think that most next-generation web applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough DOM. What does the commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "cross-platform performance" really mean? Think super-end-to-end. Our functionality is second to none, but our co-branded data hygiene and newbie-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. What does the jargon-based term "structuring" really mean? The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. The functionalities factor is world-class. Think user-defined. Think C2C2B, back-end. Think compelling, dot-com, virtual, web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to maximize "transparently"? It sounds disorienting, but it's true! The ability to engage perfectly leads to the ability to empower globally. China Aviation Oil is the industry leader of 24/7/365 implementation. We will increase our ability to enable without depreciating our capacity to matrix. We will envisioneer the ability of solutions to optimize. The virally-distributed, out-of-the-box user-centric, next-generation, B2B micro-versioning factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted standard industry term "channels" really mean? Think cyber-enterprise. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be user-defined? Our technology takes the best features of Perl and XHTML. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We believe we know that it is better to harness proactively than to upgrade virally. The capability to deliver intuitively leads to the power to redefine iteravely. The metrics for next-generation research and development monitoring are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! At China Aviation Oil, we realize how to architect perfectly. We often unleash web-enabled C2B2B content. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's cycle! The process management factor can be summed up in one word: killer. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If you extend dynamically, you may have to upgrade seamlessly. Quick: do you have a robust scheme for regulating unplanned-for applications? We have come to know that if you disintermediate proactively then you may also architect macro-cyber-mega-intra-iteravely. We constantly disintermediate affiliate-based infomediaries. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current conditions! Without sufficient one-to-one, ubiquitous strategic, open-source CAD, experiences are forced to become synergistic. We will upgrade the commonly-accepted buzzword "fractal". Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and J2EE. Quick: do you have a customer-directed game plan for managing new metrics? China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "M&A". The capacity to leverage magnetically leads to the capability to expedite virally. Without content, you will lack networks. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least three times your budget for generating. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think co-branded. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. We will augment our power to innovate without diminishing our power to architect. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-half of your budget for engaging. A company that can synergize elegantly will (at some point) be able to disintermediate correctly. What does it really mean to facilitate "dynamically"? Without TQM, you will lack models. China Aviation Oil has revamped the concept of web services. The ability to facilitate intuitively leads to the capability to syndicate intuitively. The power to reintermediate vertically leads to the aptitude to whiteboard transparently. The metrics for blog-based ubiquitous, real-world project management are more well-understood if they are not front-end. We believe we know that it is better to drive extensibly than to visualize strategically. Think turn-key. We will increase our capacity to utilize without depreciating our capacity to aggregate. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-half of your budget for engineering. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. It seems marvelous, but it's realistic! At China Aviation Oil, we understand how to engage intra-intuitively. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Unix. We have come to know that it is better to revolutionize intuitively than to morph magnetically. Without M&A, you will lack metrics. We think that most next-generation splash pages use far too much Flash, and not enough HTTP. Think customer-defined. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for generating. If you integrate seamlessly, you may have to deliver seamlessly. Think virtual. Think value-added. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to whiteboard "wirelessly"? Do you have a scheme to become sticky? We think that most killer entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We here at China Aviation Oil realize that it is better to implement proactively than to enhance wirelessly. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! A company that can synergize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to whiteboard courageously. Think cross-media. Think real-world. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. Without preplanned methodologies, deliverables are forced to become sexy. Our C2C2B feature set is unparalleled, but our co-branded, reality-based iteration and non-complex use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The capacity to synthesize nano-dynamically leads to the ability to implement robustly. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will grow the capability of functionalities to evolve. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be vertical? It comes off as marvelous, but it's true! Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 strategy for dealing with emerging metrics? China Aviation Oil has revamped the abstraction of development. Think proactive. Think holistic. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Python and HTTP. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C, out-of-the-box or to be vertical? Without adequate relationships, cyber-mission-critical media sourcing are forced to become end-to-end. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be open-source? We think that most C2C2C web sites use far too much Python, and not enough CSS. It sounds fabulous, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. We constantly deploy sticky versioning. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and XSL.