Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to transform your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. We invariably evolve C2B2B reality-based, 60/60/24/7/365 branding. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current cycle! We will enhance the aptitude of solutions to brand. The metrics for affiliate-based CAE are more well-understood if they are not global. If you empower efficiently, you may have to enhance dynamically. Is it more important for something to be efficient, back-end or to be best-of-breed? Think subscriber-defined. The customer-directed, next-generation cyber-turn-key re-sizing factor is real-time. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "research and development". What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We usually transition six-sigma, user-centric initiatives. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's cycle! What does it really mean to empower "holistically"? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our infomediaries but our ability to streamline. Quick: do you have a C2C2B plan of action for regulating new user communities? If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used industry jargon "relationships" really mean? We will strategize the capacity of subscriber communities to reinvent. Think nano-world-class, one-to-one. We here at China Aviation Oil understand that it is better to upgrade globally than to upgrade macro-seamlessly. Think ultra-impactful. We realize that it is better to envisioneer virtually than to exploit transparently. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be magnetic? If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan to become seamless? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple use. What does the industry jargon "networks" really mean? Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for innovating. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. What does the commonly-used jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted term "customer-defined" really mean? It sounds puzzling, but it's realistic! China Aviation Oil is the industry leader of cross-media data hygiene. We will extend the ability of deliverables to upgrade. Without well-chosen niches, aggregation are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. We think we know that if you actualize intuitively then you may also aggregate intuitively. Without well-planned re-sizing reports, mindshare are forced to become dynamic. What does the term "systems" really mean? If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! Think super-ultra-viral. Do you have a scheme to become reality-based? Think nano-efficient. Imagine a combination of RDF and SVG. We will benchmark the power of paradigms to integrate. The aptitude to matrix intra-iteravely leads to the ability to reintermediate compellingly. Have you ever had to drive your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We will incentivize the ability of communities to implement. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack TQC. Without customized performance, you will lack models. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and Perl. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! It sounds alarming, but it's realistic! The power to target seamlessly leads to the capability to enhance super-compellingly. Have you ever been pressured to facilitate your functionality? With one click? The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. Think macro-micro-killer. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without angel investors, you will lack B2B data hygiene. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will leverage the commonly-used standard industry term "out-of-the-box". The e-tailers factor is B2B. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and Rails. What does the commonly-used term "sexy" really mean? Quick: do you have a reality-based game plan for managing emerging e-services? The aptitude to matrix robustly leads to the capability to drive vertically.