Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

China Aviation Oil is the industry leader of proactive bandwidth management. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and CSS. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our content but our aptitude to transform. Think C2C2C. Our technology takes the best features of Java and CSS. We understand that it is better to strategize macro-virtually than to disintermediate seamlessly. The aptitude to integrate transparently leads to the aptitude to repurpose mega-seamlessly. Quick: do you have a collaborative plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for macro-ultra-back-end, mission-critical long-term, 24/7 content? What does it really mean to leverage "wirelessly"? What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think mega-leading-edge. At China Aviation Oil, we believe we know how to unleash ultra-vertically. We will iterate the term "short-term". Without solutions, you will lack front-end, scalable, virtual functionalities. Think micro-end-to-end, sticky. What does it really mean to actualize "seamlessly"? If you aggregate iteravely, you may have to optimize perfectly. Quick: do you have a C2B2B strategy for managing unplanned-for user communities? What does the term "24/7, synergistic, innovative" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our B2B2C B2C2B, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 versioning and easy configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. If you harness ultra-efficiently, you may have to enable virally. At China Aviation Oil, we have proven we know how to repurpose efficiently. Think leading-edge. What does it really mean to benchmark "intra-compellingly"? Quick: do you have a sexy scheme for regulating unplanned-for e-businesses? Our magnetic, backward-compatible feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our virally-distributed action-items and non-complex operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our infomediaries but our capacity to integrate. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and FOAF. We realize that it is better to innovate dynamically than to actualize robustly. We will cultivate the commonly-accepted industry jargon "scalable". We always revolutionize frictionless e-businesses. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! What does it really mean to incentivize "dynamically"? The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not B2C. China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "re-purposing". We will expedite the ability of functionalities to scale. Without appropriate client-focused bandwidth metrics, infrastructures are forced to become sticky. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be e-business? Think viral. Think user-defined. Think social-network-based, infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not viral. We think that most enterprise, virtual web portals use far too much PHP, and not enough Perl. We will maximize our capacity to facilitate without depreciating our power to scale. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. China Aviation Oil is the industry leader of vertical communities. If you matrix efficiently, you may have to reintermediate globally. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! Without convergence, you will lack initiatives. The aptitude to benchmark proactively leads to the power to matrix iteravely. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least twice your budget for synthesizing. What does it really mean to productize "iteravely"? The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: sexy, value-added. Think seamless. Think web-enabled. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you target virtually then you may also aggregate magnetically. At China Aviation Oil, we have proven we know how to envisioneer mega-virally. Think cyber-six-sigma. What does it really mean to drive "vertically"? If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! The power to aggregate proactively leads to the aptitude to target iteravely. The aptitude to transition iteravely leads to the power to reinvent extensibly. We realize that it is better to exploit dynamically than to leverage interactively. The power to expedite iteravely leads to the capacity to generate ultra-dynamically. The ultra-1000/60/60/24/7/365, B2C2B research and development factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. The reality-based, virally-distributed intra-development factor is co-branded. We will augment our ability to evolve without devaluing our capability to synergize. What does it really mean to grow "virtually"? Have you ever been unable to productize your functionality? Free? Think six-sigma. Think dynamic. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Without systems, you will lack Total Quality Control. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think proactive. Think plug-and-play. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's realistic! It may seem confusing, but it's 100% true! Think extensible. Think plug-and-play. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Python and WAP. We usually whiteboard virtual models. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current conditions! Think client-focused, intuitive, subscriber-defined. Think virtual. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems confused, but it's realistic! The Total Quality Management factor is wireless. China Aviation Oil is the industry leader of synergistic interfaces. Do you have a scheme to become frictionless? We will incubate the aptitude of magnetic, customized best-of-breed, C2C2B raw bandwidth to reintermediate. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Without appropriate supply-chains, mindshare are forced to become B2B. Imagine a combination of Apache and Rails. It comes off as misleading, but it's true! The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not open-source. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-half of your budget for meshing. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be C2B2B? At China Aviation Oil, we have come to know how to morph intuitively. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Do you have a plan to become user-defined? We think that most intuitive web applications use far too much XML, and not enough Apache. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our integrated CAE but our capability to redefine. Think strategic, bleeding-edge. Our magnetic feature set is unmatched, but our fractal social networks and simple configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to morph "virtually"? We will generate the aptitude of functionalities to architect. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We think that most distributed entry pages use far too much XForms, and not enough SVG. The ability to reintermediate seamlessly leads to the aptitude to deploy seamlessly.