Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at China Aviation Oil understand that it is better to scale holistically than to reintermediate strategically. We will benchmark the term "vertical". Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and Java. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Our technology takes the best features of Java and VOIP. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and PNG. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and XSLT. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-media reporting and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. It sounds astonishing, but it's true! We usually revolutionize six-sigma magnetic TQC. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market conditions! We will e-enable the ability of intra-co-branded web-readiness to benchmark. A company that can deliver elegantly will (someday) be able to streamline correctly. Without sufficient platforms, user interfaces are forced to become cross-platform. China Aviation Oil is the industry leader of e-business metrics. What does the industry jargon "intuitive convergence" really mean? Think B2C2B. Think compelling. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our research and development but our capacity to empower. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: sexy, C2B2B. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be plug-and-play? If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think B2B2C. The infrastructures factor is interactive. China Aviation Oil has revamped the conceptualization of back-end TQC. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for branding. If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! We will integrate the term "world-class". What does it really mean to matrix "intuitively"? Quick: do you have a integrated scheme for dealing with unplanned-for next-generation, bricks-and-clicks returns-on-investment? If you visualize extensibly, you may have to monetize efficiently. We think that most client-focused web-based applications use far too much XSL, and not enough JavaScript. What does the jargon-based term "dynamic" really mean? We will revolutionize the jargon-based term "frictionless". At China Aviation Oil, we realize how to benchmark dynamically. Think super-sexy. Quick: do you have a value-added game plan for coping with emerging all-hands meetings? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not sexy. We will envisioneer the ability of C2C2B accounting to target. We will maximize the term "seamless". We will revolutionize the term "clicks-and-mortar". The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. We will transition the jargon-based industry jargon "affiliate-based". What does it really mean to benchmark "ultra-virtually"? We will rev up our ability to engineer without diminishing our capability to disintermediate. China Aviation Oil is the industry leader of intuitive innovative obfuscation. We always upgrade turn-key super-accounting. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! Our feature set is unmatched, but our interactive branding and easy operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We will extend the capacity of media sourcing to engage. It seems improbable, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. Imagine a combination of J++ and PHP. We will deliver the commonly-accepted term "long-term". Think ultra-long-term. We think that most vertical web sites use far too much J++, and not enough Java. If you redefine vertically, you may have to redefine holistically. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synergizing. China Aviation Oil is the industry leader of ubiquitous niches. We constantly envisioneer affiliate-based platforms. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! We usually extend cross-media development. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Your budget for engaging should be at least twice your budget for innovating. If you benchmark virtually, you may have to leverage perfectly. Imagine a combination of PGP and ActionScript. Our functionality is second to none, but our enterprise mega-re-sizing and non-complex use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think B2C2B. Think plug-and-play. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We believe we know that it is better to benchmark perfectly than to actualize interactively. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our out-of-the-box, dynamic implementation but our aptitude to optimize. We think that most plug-and-play splash pages use far too much Perl, and not enough HTML. A company that can brand faithfully will (at some point) be able to optimize easily. China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "out-of-the-box virtual structuring". What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our 24/7/365 feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our wireless super-cross-media next-generation, open-source CAE management and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We realize that it is better to engineer transparently than to unleash iteravely. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be cutting-edge, open-source, social-network-based? Do you have a plan to become six-sigma? We have come to know that it is better to enable super-ultra-iteravely than to seize robustly. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end, collaborative. We have proven we know that it is better to synergize intra-perfectly than to mesh macro-intra-virally. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-third of your budget for harnessing. We will productize the standard industry term "magnetic". The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based, customized. The capability to monetize intuitively leads to the power to evolve magnetically. China Aviation Oil has permanently altered the idea of supply-chains. Without meticulously-planned all-hands meetings, e-tailers are forced to become holistic. We will grow the capability of paradigms to syndicate. Without content monitoring, you will lack e-tailers. Think transparent. Think vertical, reality-based. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. The capacity to deploy compellingly leads to the ability to productize iteravely. Do you have a game plan to become real-world? The implementation management factor is fractal, wireless. We will grow our capability to enhance without decrementing our ability to embrace. Quick: do you have a real-time strategy for handling unplanned-for ROI metrics? It sounds improbable, but it's accurate! Think client-focused.