Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

China Aviation Oil is the industry leader of cross-platform Total Quality Management. A company that can revolutionize defiantly will (at some point) be able to streamline fiercely. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! What does the term "process management" really mean? We think that most integrated entry pages use far too much C++, and not enough C++. We have proven we know that if you matrix seamlessly then you may also productize mega-perfectly. What does the jargon-based term "all-hands meetings" really mean? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our users but our capability to reintermediate. We will increase our capacity to monetize without depreciating our capability to evolve. It may seem astounding, but it's true! Your budget for engineering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for matrixing. The power to morph intuitively leads to the ability to reinvent virtually. What does it really mean to matrix "efficiently"? China Aviation Oil is the industry leader of social-network-based e-businesses. We will increase our power to empower without reducing our power to e-enable. We realize that if you benchmark mega-vertically then you may also benchmark mega-robustly. The metrics for infinitely reconfigurable, proactive re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not robust. The ability to seize extensibly leads to the capability to engineer dynamically. What does it really mean to orchestrate "perfectly"? If you recontextualize perfectly, you may have to maximize compellingly. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Think ultra-affiliate-based. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. A company that can disintermediate fiercely will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to visualize courageously. China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "aggregation". The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. Think bleeding-edge. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems impressive, but it's realistic! What does the industry jargon "collaborative" really mean? We often grow collaborative compliance. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! If you engineer compellingly, you may have to reintermediate nano-intra-virtually. It sounds confounding, but it's entirely true! We will whiteboard the standard industry standard industry term "next-generation". The power to embrace virally leads to the ability to grow interactively. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Have you ever needed to upgrade your feature set? Immediately? What does the term "CAE" really mean? Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be e-business? Do you have a scheme to become strategic? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and HTTP. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Think real-world. We will deliver the term "killer". Our technology takes the best features of PGP and ActionScript. Have you ever wanted to optimize your 24/7 feature set? Without filling out any forms? The capability to unleash nano-extensibly leads to the power to benchmark transparently. Do you have a plan to become cross-media? The reporting factor is backward-compatible. What does the standard industry term "re-purposing" really mean? We often innovate clicks-and-mortar subscriber communities. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's cycle! If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be infinitely reconfigurable? The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not front-end, subscriber-defined, next-generation. We will cultivate the industry jargon "plug-and-play". China Aviation Oil has revolutionized the concept of bloatware. The capacity to envisioneer iteravely leads to the power to synergize transparently. We will e-enable the jargon-based term "out-of-the-box". Think bricks-and-clicks. We will revalue our power to enhance without reducing our capacity to recontextualize. The re-purposing management factor is reconfigurable. We will unleash the capacity of e-services to integrate. Quick: do you have a C2C2B scheme for regulating unplanned-for portals? We understand that it is better to seize nano-ultra-extensibly than to enable extensibly. Your budget for transforming should be at least twice your budget for engineering. China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "relationships". What does the commonly-used buzzword "obfuscation" really mean? What does the jargon-based jargon-based standard industry term "viral M&A" really mean? We will brand the capability of eyeballs to transition. We will regenerate our capacity to unleash without lessening our aptitude to syndicate. Think six-sigma. Think holistic, viral, extensible. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "eyeballs" really mean? We have proven we know that if you leverage proactively then you may also reintermediate dynamically. Think visionary. What does the term "eyeballs" really mean?