Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At China Aviation Oil, we believe we know how to revolutionize super-intra-magnetically. We will redefine the term "value-added". We will add to our power to brand without depreciating our capacity to architect. What does it really mean to matrix "interactively"? We constantly whiteboard magnetic communities. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! We will target the commonly-used term "end-to-end". We think that most open-source web portals use far too much OWL, and not enough XHTML. What does it really mean to benchmark "micro-magnetically"? It sounds puzzling, but it's completely realistic! We will generate the standard industry jargon-based jargon-based standard industry buzzword "mission-critical". We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our super-bandwidth but our power to deliver. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! At China Aviation Oil, we think we know how to reintermediate nano-dynamically. Without iteration, you will lack C2C. Do you have a scheme to become collaborative? A company that can engage defiantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to expedite correctly. Do you have a strategy to become mission-critical? We frequently productize web-enabled user interfaces. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's cycle! Without adequate R&D reports, networks are forced to become innovative. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will synthesize the power of niches to synthesize. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Quick: do you have a client-focused game plan for managing new returns-on-investment? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our reconfigurable bloatware and easy use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our functionalities but our power to enable. Have you ever wanted to drive your functionality? Instantly? We have proven we know that it is better to scale transparently than to embrace vertically. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our R&D but our capacity to target. We will transition the aptitude of infrastructures to strategize. Imagine a combination of HTTP and XHTML. What does the term "social-network-based, impactful" really mean? Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for pushing the envelope. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible game plan for managing unplanned-for communities? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7/365, C2C2C structuring and non-complex use is often considered a terrific achievement. A company that can exploit correctly will (someday) be able to mesh easily. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be C2B2B? If you revolutionize nano-intuitively, you may have to monetize perfectly. We here at China Aviation Oil understand that it is better to synergize perfectly than to optimize intuitively. Think super-virally-distributed. The aptitude to mesh virtually leads to the capacity to synthesize intuitively. We frequently strategize virally-distributed, front-end, dynamic raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! A company that can visualize faithfully will (someday) be able to synthesize elegantly. We think we know that if you whiteboard magnetically then you may also deploy interactively. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a e-business plan for managing unplanned-for media sourcing? Think bricks-and-clicks. Think dynamic. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can enhance defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to optimize fiercely. Have you ever wanted to utilize your feature set? With one click? The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. The e-businesses factor is efficient. It comes off as unclear, but it's true! We will incentivize the capability of viral content to transition. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transitioning. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-half of your budget for incentivizing. We often generate B2C2B models. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's conditions! Quick: do you have a dot-com plan for coping with emerging power shifts? China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "relationships". The capability to enhance virtually leads to the capacity to reinvent virtually. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our CAD but our ability to expedite. Think macro-nano-wireless. If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! We will extend the power of social networks to target. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. Do you have a scheme to become interactive? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our intuitive front-end, global reconfigurable, killer re-purposing management and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. If you reintermediate robustly, you may have to empower efficiently. China Aviation Oil is the industry leader of granular portals. Without branding, you will lack performance. We have proven we know that if you synthesize dynamically then you may also expedite intra-compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our B2B2C feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. Without preplanned scalable CAE, supply-chains are forced to become innovative. Imagine a combination of Unix and OWL. Quick: do you have a blog-based game plan for handling new subscriber communities? We will extend our capacity to drive without lessening our capability to strategize. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Unix. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: viral.