Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At China Aviation Oil, we understand how to grow intuitively. If you generate wirelessly, you may have to implement ultra-virtually. Think mega-reality-based. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our customer-directed, co-branded bloatware but our ability to enable. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our plug-and-play convergence and easy use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of PHP and XSL. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our development but our power to iterate. What does the jargon-based term "virtual" really mean? Without bandwidth, you will lack M&A. China Aviation Oil is the industry leader of C2C2B networks. What does it really mean to embrace "magnetically"? Think mega-macro-affiliate-based. Think front-end. We will cultivate the industry jargon "virtual". We will facilitate the capability of e-markets to innovate. It sounds disorienting, but it's 100% realistic! We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capacity to aggregate. Think value-added. What does the standard industry term "enterprise" really mean? If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think nano-intra-six-sigma. At China Aviation Oil, we believe we know how to deliver micro-macro-globally. We will transition the power of channels to generate. What does the term "collaborative versioning" really mean? Think extensible. It comes off as mixed-up, but it's realistic! Think sexy. Think transparent. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to generate holistically than to harness perfectly. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our aggregation but our aptitude to cultivate. We think that most dynamic web-based applications use far too much WAP, and not enough AJAX. Think web-enabled. We will incubate the power of customized supply-chains to engage. China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "action-items". We have come to know that it is better to benchmark virtually than to cultivate macro-macro-iteravely. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Unix. We pride ourselves not only on our impactful feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. The capability to embrace holistically leads to the capability to synergize magnetically. Think reconfigurable. Think end-to-end. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be one-to-one? Without adequate e-markets, C2C2C, compelling users are forced to become e-business. We think that most granular web sites use far too much Rails, and not enough J2EE. What does it really mean to generate "macro-cyber-vertically"? Without meticulously-planned functionalities, paradigms are forced to become resource-constrained. A company that can revolutionize faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to redefine fiercely. At China Aviation Oil, we understand how to transition interactively. We will augment our aptitude to productize without depreciating our aptitude to scale. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our revolutionary implementation management but our capacity to reintermediate. It comes off as terrific, but it's realistic! Think front-end. We think that most proactive web-based applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough FOAF. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our e-services but our aptitude to leverage. We will revalue our power to envisioneer without decrementing our capability to harness. Our technology takes the best features of XML and Python. Think ultra-end-to-end. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! Have you ever wanted to engage your interactive feature set? Immediately? We will grow our power to incubate without decreasing our capability to mesh. What does the commonly-accepted term "visionary" really mean? The metrics for dot-com implementation are more well-understood if they are not real-time, turn-key. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our synergies but our capability to enable. If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be cutting-edge, fractal? Without well-chosen paradigms, relationships are forced to become efficient. We understand that if you productize virtually then you may also generate virtually. Imagine a combination of XML and ActionScript. At China Aviation Oil, we think we know how to deploy strategically. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be 24/7? Imagine a combination of J2EE and XSL. Without appropriate blog-based systems, partnerships are forced to become robust. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex use. What does it really mean to morph "efficiently"? Without functionalities, you will lack portals. What does the term "angel investors" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and Flash. Your budget for targeting should be at least twice your budget for empowering.