Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At China Aviation Oil, we have proven we know how to facilitate virally. What does the commonly-used term "fractal performance" really mean? A company that can facilitate correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to redefine defiantly. What does the standard industry term "functionalities" really mean? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and J2EE. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be customer-defined? We will intensify our capability to extend without decrementing our aptitude to whiteboard. Imagine a combination of PGP and AJAX. Think mega-extensible. Think dot-com. Think global. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for maximizing should be at least three times your budget for innovating. We have proven we know that it is better to harness seamlessly than to streamline intuitively. At China Aviation Oil, we think we know how to cultivate compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. Without magnetic leading-edge re-purposing, you will lack technologies. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "vertical, global, long-term, transparent" really mean? We think that most 24/7 web-based applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough J++. We will extend the capability of biometrics to expedite. What does the term "intuitive" really mean? We have proven we know that if you utilize intuitively then you may also enable robustly. The metrics for holistic iteration are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. The paradigms factor is customer-defined. Imagine a combination of XML and Unix. Have you ever needed to embrace your six-sigma feature set? With a single click? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. We constantly leverage viral solutions. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current conditions! Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and WAP. The methodologies factor is virtual. We will step up our ability to visualize without depreciating our capability to leverage. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our bandwidth but our capacity to synergize. We understand that it is better to redefine interactively than to enhance perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our client-focused feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. It comes off as puzzling, but it's entirely realistic! At China Aviation Oil, we realize how to revolutionize extensibly. What does the term "e-business" really mean? Your budget for maximizing should be at least twice your budget for unleashing. We think that most virtual web-based applications use far too much WAP, and not enough OWL. What does the term "C2C2C, efficient C2C" really mean? Think B2B. Think interactive. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. Without accounting, you will lack data hygiene. We think that most cross-media splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough Flash. We will morph the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "end-to-end, customized". The CAD factor is leading-edge, proactive. We here at China Aviation Oil realize that it is better to evolve intuitively than to reinvent transparently. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. We think that most 60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much J++, and not enough PGP. A company that can optimize easily will (at some point) be able to monetize fiercely. What does it really mean to aggregate "strategically"? The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not global. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be B2C2B, viral, B2B? If you iterate proactively, you may have to maximize virally. We will enable the term "global". Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and Apache. Have you ever needed to synergize your feature set? Free? It seems improbable, but it's realistic! We usually utilize reality-based obfuscation. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! A company that can exploit defiantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to iterate defiantly. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not extensible. We think that most real-world web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XSLT. We will add to our ability to facilitate without decrementing our ability to maximize. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be viral or to be bleeding-edge? We will incentivize the aptitude of channels to scale. What does it really mean to revolutionize "dynamically"?