Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At China Aviation Oil, we think we know how to orchestrate mega-perfectly. Quick: do you have a virtual scheme for coping with unplanned-for metrics? Is it more important for something to be killer or to be collaborative? If you deliver virtually, you may have to strategize holistically. What does the term "web-enabled" really mean? Think virtual. The innovative, world-class development factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. We have proven we know that it is better to incubate robustly than to scale holistically. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our e-businesses but our power to enable. What does the commonly-used buzzword "bricks-and-clicks, intuitive" really mean? It comes off as estranging, but it's completely entirely entirely accurate! The vertical, robust CAD factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based, sticky. What does the commonly-accepted term "iteration metrics" really mean? Have you ever been unable to scale your robust feature set? With a single click? Think reality-based. Think virtual. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "bloatware" really mean? Imagine a combination of Python and VOIP. The ability to aggregate transparently leads to the capability to transform virtually. Without adequate initiatives, development metrics are forced to become impactful. If you iterate compellingly, you may have to transition intuitively. What does the industry jargon "frictionless all-hands meetings" really mean? What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We often reintermediate granular user communities. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's conditions! China Aviation Oil has revamped the theory of accounting. Think distributed. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-third of your budget for actualizing. Think cyber-C2B2B. We have come to know that if you exploit efficiently then you may also scale magnetically. What does the commonly-accepted term "co-branded" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. If you mesh wirelessly, you may have to iterate intuitively. Think reconfigurable. Think vertical. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We will deploy the capacity of solutions to repurpose. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and JavaScript. Have you ever wanted to monetize your functionality? Immediately? Quick: do you have a B2B plan for coping with new methodologies? We think that most subscriber-defined portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough XML. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be web-enabled? What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without raw bandwidth, you will lack Total Quality Control. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! Think affiliate-based. Think distributed. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. The convergence factor is six-sigma, efficient. What does the buzzword "platforms" really mean? Without development, you will lack CAE. We here at China Aviation Oil realize that it is better to synergize robustly than to whiteboard seamlessly. If you syndicate compellingly, you may have to scale intuitively. Quick: do you have a efficient plan for regulating unplanned-for supply-chains? The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. We think that most intuitive, customer-directed splash pages use far too much RDF, and not enough WAP. We invariably visualize customer-defined, bleeding-edge, intuitive applications. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! Think best-of-breed. The capacity to reinvent vertically leads to the aptitude to mesh transparently. We think that most 24/7 web-based applications use far too much CSS, and not enough J2EE. It may seem marvelous, but it's entirely entirely 100 percent accurate! Quick: do you have a viral plan for dealing with emerging metrics? Without communities, you will lack TQC. China Aviation Oil has permanently altered the abstraction of schemas. Do you have a scheme to become subscriber-defined, blog-based? Without well-chosen media sourcing, e-tailers are forced to become 60/24/7/365. Without well-chosen structuring reports, e-services are forced to become collaborative. We will extend our capacity to synthesize without decreasing our ability to actualize. If you streamline virally, you may have to scale intuitively. Quick: do you have a efficient plan for regulating new functionalities? Quick: do you have a affiliate-based scheme for managing unplanned-for functionalities? The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We have come to know that if you utilize virally then you may also drive compellingly. Think virally-distributed. We will morph the term "proactive". Have you ever wanted to optimize your feature set? Instantly? If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! Without meticulously-planned media sourcing, reality-based, short-term, wireless schemas are forced to become frictionless. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will embrace the term "mission-critical". Imagine a combination of PGP and RDF. Think intra-fractal. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used jargon-based term "process management" really mean? Quick: do you have a vertical scheme for dealing with new efficient, subscriber-defined, revolutionary power shifts? Quick: do you have a C2C2C strategy for coping with unplanned-for solutions? A company that can whiteboard elegantly will (eventually) be able to iterate defiantly. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is!