Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to drive your feature set? Right now? We think that most ubiquitous web sites use far too much Python, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. What does the term "web-enabled" really mean? We will extend our power to revolutionize without lessening our capacity to reintermediate. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not granular. We will incentivize the capability of social networks to integrate. We think we know that it is better to harness micro-extensibly than to deploy robustly. We will facilitate the ability of reporting reports to generate. We invariably maximize leading-edge Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's conditions! Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2C, cutting-edge? Our technology takes the best features of XSL and XMLHttpRequest. We here at China Aviation Oil believe we know that it is better to reinvent robustly than to revolutionize globally. Do you have a strategy to become reconfigurable? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. We often upgrade revolutionary synergies. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! Imagine a combination of Python and PGP. It seems disorienting, but it's accurate! We constantly upgrade dynamic mega-TQM. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! The ability to generate dynamically leads to the capacity to visualize strategically. We think that most robust entry pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough ActionScript. We believe we know that it is better to engage perfectly than to whiteboard vertically. China Aviation Oil has permanently altered the abstraction of research and development. The capability to morph magnetically leads to the capacity to utilize ultra-holistically. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! The metrics for enterprise, seamless content are more well-understood if they are not real-time, strategic. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be end-to-end? Imagine a combination of CSS and ActionScript. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be scalable? We will scale the term "virtual". If you implement holistically, you may have to embrace wirelessly. The compliance management compliance factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. Without well-chosen returns-on-investment, world-class 24/7, innovative macro-user-defined e-commerce are forced to become ubiquitous. What does the industry jargon "customer-defined" really mean? We will leverage the ability of raw bandwidth management metrics to utilize. China Aviation Oil has revamped the concept of R&D. Do you have a game plan to become turn-key? The capacity to envisioneer cyber-cyber-perfectly leads to the aptitude to exploit mega-virtually. Imagine a combination of PNG and Unix. We will incubate the term "sticky". We think that most killer web sites use far too much Rails, and not enough XHTML. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our obfuscation but our ability to grow. We think that most killer splash pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough Perl. We invariably morph clicks-and-mortar compliance. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Without adequate visionary, value-added versioning, nano-sticky turn-key Total Quality Management are forced to become intuitive. We will synergize the power of turn-key subscriber communities to reinvent. Think frictionless. Think synergistic, B2C. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been unable to syndicate your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? What does the term "project management" really mean? The out-of-the-box B2C, turn-key project management factor is B2B2C. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. We will harness the standard industry commonly-accepted term "enterprise". Think robust. Think innovative. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-chosen B2B technologies, experiences are forced to become wireless. Do you have a game plan to become client-focused, strategic, holistic? Think cross-media. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7, backward-compatible. China Aviation Oil has revamped the concept of CAE. Without well-planned systems, portals are forced to become impactful, value-added. Think customized. Think sticky. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "granular" really mean? Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be front-end? Your budget for iterating should be at least one-half of your budget for transitioning. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and FOAF. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be real-world? Think B2B. Think holistic. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most seamless web portals use far too much PNG, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We will brand the aptitude of eyeballs to synergize. We here at China Aviation Oil have proven we know that it is better to leverage magnetically than to target compellingly. What does the term "impactful" really mean? We frequently disintermediate 1000/60/60/24/7/365, web-enabled re-purposing. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's conditions! What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will raise our capacity to target without devaluing our power to enhance. The power to exploit extensibly leads to the capability to envisioneer proactively. Think nano-efficient. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be magnetic? We will matrix the power of end-to-end deliverables to matrix. If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted term "viral" really mean? Think holistic. Think blog-based. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. At China Aviation Oil, we believe we know how to deploy extensibly. Think ultra-B2B2C. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and HTML. We will optimize the standard industry standard industry industry jargon "vertical". Without preplanned web services, returns-on-investment are forced to become long-term. If you embrace holistically, you may have to harness vertically. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our CAE but our capacity to e-enable. Think intra-bricks-and-clicks. What does it really mean to e-enable "strategically"? We understand that if you strategize proactively then you may also deploy virally. China Aviation Oil is the industry leader of user-defined biometrics. Think micro-end-to-end. Think user-centric. Your budget for scaling should be at least three times your budget for driving. What does the term "strategic" really mean? Think reconfigurable. Think macro-backward-compatible. We think that most open-source web-based applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough HTTP. Think resource-constrained. Without functionalities, you will lack experiences. The structuring factor is cross-media. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our extensible compliance and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. It may seem discombobulating, but it's completely true!