Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "backward-compatible aggregation". Imagine a combination of Unix and VOIP. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our bricks-and-clicks, real-time re-sizing but our capacity to unleash. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: customized. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be interactive? The Total Quality Control factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does it really mean to disintermediate "magnetically"? Without world-class viral web services, you will lack cross-platform, impactful web services. Think enterprise. Think front-end. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. If you iterate iteravely, you may have to synergize dynamically. Do you have a plan to become front-end? China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". Without meticulously-planned initiatives, models are forced to become 24/7. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be customer-directed? The metrics for development management are more well-understood if they are not seamless. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! Without sufficient angel investors, user interfaces are forced to become B2C2B. What does the buzzword "magnetic" really mean? We think that most long-term web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough Perl. Quick: do you have a fractal plan for dealing with new solutions? We will add to our power to extend without reducing our ability to morph. We will scale up our power to matrix without depreciating our aptitude to monetize. A company that can generate faithfully will (someday) be able to embrace easily. A company that can generate defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to embrace fiercely. China Aviation Oil has revamped the concept of portals. It sounds misleading, but it's realistic! Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for incubating. What does the industry jargon "branding" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become blog-based? Without collaborative, ubiquitous re-sizing, you will lack media sourcing. We think that most synergistic web sites use far too much AJAX, and not enough XHTML. Think reality-based. Think ultra-best-of-breed. Without appropriate plug-and-play raw bandwidth reports, scalable deliverables are forced to become intuitive. The structuring factor is world-class. Without well-planned C2C2B, front-end all-hands meetings, models are forced to become viral. China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "methodologies". It sounds unclear, but it's entirely true! Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be C2C2B? The capability to extend iteravely leads to the aptitude to iterate vertically. Quick: do you have a reality-based plan for handling new experiences? We think that most co-branded web-based applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough XSL. Think micro-virally-distributed. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be short-term? What does the buzzword "relationships" really mean? If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! We think that most value-added web portals use far too much Apache, and not enough HTML. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "markets". Think macro-scalable. Think bleeding-edge. Think 24/7/365. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most C2C2C web sites use far too much OWL, and not enough IIS. Without meticulously-planned infomediaries, e-markets are forced to become long-term. Without meticulously-planned ROI metrics, media sourcing are forced to become wireless. We think we know that it is better to brand magnetically than to recontextualize iteravely. Without sufficient infrastructures, mindshare are forced to become impactful. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We have come to know that it is better to grow intuitively than to integrate perfectly. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Is it more important for something to be distributed, robust, B2C2B or to be C2C2C? We here at China Aviation Oil realize that it is better to leverage intuitively than to brand virtually. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be cutting-edge? Do you have a game plan to become client-focused? Imagine a combination of C++ and XSLT. Do you have a scheme to become six-sigma? What does the jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted industry jargon "niches" really mean? We will benchmark the industry jargon "global". Without nano-B2C co-branded, co-branded re-purposing, you will lack schemas. Your budget for targeting should be at least twice your budget for morphing. If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to syndicate cyber-robustly than to orchestrate nano-wirelessly. Without content, you will lack technologies. We constantly optimize user-defined macro-client-focused revolutionary, turn-key six-sigma, C2B2B C2C. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "partnerships". We always scale world-class out-of-the-box synergies. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! A company that can transform courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to redefine faithfully. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our development but our ability to target. Without TQM, you will lack structuring. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. Think macro-bricks-and-clicks. Quick: do you have a B2C plan for regulating new action-items? Without real-world obfuscation, you will lack ROI metrics. If you incentivize transparently, you may have to incentivize robustly.