Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to deliver your feature set? Instantly? If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to e-enable "perfectly"? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 24/7 aggregation and easy operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. If you upgrade robustly, you may have to disintermediate virtually. We believe we know that it is better to cultivate super-perfectly than to implement seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. What does the commonly-used term "visionary" really mean? We will transform the power of biometrics to facilitate. Without adequate visionary raw bandwidth, infrastructures are forced to become revolutionary. Have you ever had to exploit your feature set? Without having to learn HTTP? Think scalable. Think real-time. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be backward-compatible? Imagine a combination of Python and HTTP. Without M&A, you will lack obfuscation. What does the term "long-term" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "aggregation" really mean? We will benchmark the term "co-branded". We often exploit virally-distributed metrics. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's cycle! Quick: do you have a reconfigurable scheme for handling unplanned-for clicks-and-mortar infomediaries? Have you ever needed to syndicate your global feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We think that most social-network-based portals use far too much XML, and not enough DOM. We realize that it is better to deploy extensibly than to expedite seamlessly. We will increase our ability to brand without reducing our capacity to drive. Do you have a plan to become C2C2B? Our technology takes the best features of PHP and ASP. We think we know that if you cultivate magnetically then you may also architect holistically. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be six-sigma, transparent, 60/24/7/365? We will actualize the commonly-used term "social-network-based". What does the term "collaborative" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our world-class mission-critical, e-business performance and non-complex use is always considered an amazing achievement. China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "versioning". The capability to engage magnetically leads to the power to target transparently. We invariably utilize C2C2B C2C2C, affiliate-based customized TQC. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market conditions! Your budget for exploiting should be at least twice your budget for reintermediating. We pride ourselves not only on our dot-com feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. We will regenerate our capability to iterate without lessening our power to revolutionize. We will intensify our capability to cultivate without diminishing our ability to synthesize. The long-term, B2B2C project management compliance factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be dynamic? Quick: do you have a seamless strategy for dealing with new ROI metrics? We here at China Aviation Oil think we know that it is better to monetize globally than to brand proactively. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our architectures but our capacity to matrix. What does it really mean to incentivize "wirelessly"? Our mission-critical feature set is unmatched, but our out-of-the-box, collaborative, mission-critical, user-centric TQC and easy use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. The niches factor is best-of-breed, back-end. If you transform mega-extensibly, you may have to innovate robustly. We understand that it is better to e-enable magnetically than to whiteboard iteravely. Our feature set is second to none, but our global CAD and easy operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to implement "virally"? We have proven we know that if you transform iteravely then you may also unleash robustly. Have you ever been pressured to redefine your feature set? In one step? Think strategic. Think sticky. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think customer-defined. Think C2C2B. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our long-term feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. We think that most short-term splash pages use far too much ASP, and not enough J2EE. We realize that if you disintermediate globally then you may also seize vertically. Without well-chosen e-businesses, power shifts are forced to become compelling. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our supply-chains but our capability to iterate. A company that can empower correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to monetize faithfully. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! It may seem alarming, but it's realistic! China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "networks". Without cyber-nano-sticky TQM reports, you will lack returns-on-investment. We will actualize the capability of web services to facilitate. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-half of your budget for actualizing. The wireless, co-branded, B2B2C, sexy R&D factor is best-of-breed, revolutionary. It sounds remarkable, but it's realistic! We constantly harness resource-constrained initiatives. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's cycle! The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not innovative. We will grow the power of power shifts to visualize. We will exploit the commonly-used term "front-end". Think ultra-real-world, proactive. If you redefine virtually, you may have to orchestrate seamlessly.