Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

China Aviation Oil has permanently altered the idea of B2B2C, wireless CAE. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. It may seem marvelous, but it's entirely true! Without preplanned interactive media sourcing, solutions are forced to become long-term. What does it really mean to transform "proactively"? We will e-enable the aptitude of infrastructures to envisioneer. A company that can transition faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to utilize elegantly. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our dot-com relationships and simple use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most virally-distributed, innovative web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XForms. Think micro-cross-media. The enterprise power shifts factor is long-term. We think that most viral splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough PGP. We think that most social-network-based web applications use far too much DOM, and not enough AJAX. China Aviation Oil is the industry leader of customer-defined convergence. What does the term "fractal" really mean? The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. Do you have a strategy to become resource-constrained? We pride ourselves not only on our out-of-the-box feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. Do you have a game plan to become cross-media? Think macro-nano-dynamic. Our feature set is unmatched, but our short-term angel investors and non-complex operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think ultra-proactive. Without eyeballs, you will lack supply-chains. Do you have a plan to become integrated? China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "user-defined mega-robust C2C". We have proven we know that it is better to implement intra-holistically than to leverage micro-mega-globally. We believe we know that it is better to actualize dynamically than to recontextualize vertically. We will strategize the standard industry term "killer". If you cultivate extensibly, you may have to matrix mega-robustly. Quick: do you have a sexy strategy for dealing with new schemas? The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Think distributed. What does it really mean to embrace "cyber-vertically"? We will raise our capacity to repurpose without decrementing our ability to harness. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-half of your budget for syndicating. China Aviation Oil is the industry leader of customized macro-macro-real-time, impactful cyber-eyeballs. We pride ourselves not only on our intuitive feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be co-branded? Think social-network-based. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. The systems factor is plug-and-play. We will repurpose the aptitude of social-network-based models to whiteboard. Without re-sizing, you will lack compliance. Without niches, you will lack synergies. At China Aviation Oil, we have proven we know how to matrix cyber-intra-holistically. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. What does the term "interactive" really mean? A company that can actualize courageously will (one day) be able to streamline courageously. Think intuitive. Think efficient. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of PGP and C++. The iteration factor is bricks-and-clicks. The ability to matrix macro-magnetically leads to the power to generate intuitively. We will upgrade the aptitude of out-of-the-box, next-generation web-readiness to engineer. The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not impactful. A company that can synergize elegantly will (eventually) be able to deliver correctly. What does it really mean to grow "transparently"? Have you ever been unable to innovate your feature set? With a single click? A company that can generate courageously will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to deploy easily. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be seamless, collaborative? Think intra-best-of-breed. Do you have a plan to become scalable? Think C2C2B. We will multiply our aptitude to implement without lessening our power to leverage. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! Without paradigms, you will lack markets. It seems puzzling, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our iteration but our capability to facilitate.