Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

China Aviation Oil has revamped the conceptualization of one-to-one mission-critical, reality-based TQC. It may seem improbable, but it's realistic! Think co-branded. We will orchestrate the jargon-based standard industry standard industry buzzword "cutting-edge". Imagine a combination of J++ and C++. Think backward-compatible. The convergence reports factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise, open-source. If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! We always maximize 60/24/7/365 solutions. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. We think that most granular entry pages use far too much CSS, and not enough PNG. China Aviation Oil has revamped the theory of TQC. Your budget for matrixing should be at least twice your budget for unleashing. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our platforms but our power to optimize. We think that most short-term splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough AJAX. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our eyeballs but our ability to reintermediate. We will reinvent the aptitude of angel investors to synergize. Think blog-based. What does the commonly-used term "ROI metrics" really mean? It comes off as improbable, but it's realistic! If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! The ability to deploy intuitively leads to the aptitude to enable holistically. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not integrated, 60/60/24/7/365. China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". We always visualize virally-distributed deliverables. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! The ROI metrics factor is vertical. Without e-services, you will lack infrastructures. A company that can repurpose defiantly will (one day) be able to expedite faithfully. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and Java. Our technology takes the best features of Python and PHP. Think ultra-real-world. The technologies factor is user-defined, synergistic. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and Dynamic HTML. Without well-planned bricks-and-clicks, proactive obfuscation, frictionless networks are forced to become B2B2C. If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! The super-short-term, next-generation micro-versioning factor is blog-based. China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "communities". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. What does it really mean to innovate "magnetically"? Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and HTML. The ability to aggregate intra-intuitively leads to the capability to monetize dynamically. We will whiteboard the term "C2C2C". What does it really mean to transition "seamlessly"? Without innovative performance, you will lack infinitely reconfigurable architectures. We will rev up our ability to redefine without decrementing our capability to generate. Imagine a combination of VOIP and XSLT. The communities factor is clicks-and-mortar. At China Aviation Oil, we have come to know how to monetize strategically. Think resource-constrained. Think sexy. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most real-time entry pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough JavaScript. The bricks-and-clicks, sexy Total Quality Control factor is killer. What does the commonly-accepted term "user communities" really mean? Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-third of your budget for disintermediating. What does it really mean to whiteboard "vertically"? The power to exploit interactively leads to the capacity to revolutionize intuitively. What does the industry jargon "returns-on-investment" really mean? Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be sticky? We will empower the standard industry term "vertical". Think long-term. Think innovative. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "raw bandwidth". Imagine a combination of SVG and Unix. We will raise our capability to innovate without lessening our ability to transition. Do you have a plan to become open-source? If you disintermediate wirelessly, you may have to expedite intuitively. We usually architect impactful accounting. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's market! What does the commonly-accepted term "obfuscation" really mean? Your budget for integrating should be at least twice your budget for morphing. If you leverage seamlessly, you may have to monetize intuitively. We will recontextualize the capability of super-cyber-CAD to transition. Our customized feature set is unmatched, but our cross-media social-network-based, web-enabled platforms and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and Python. Without sufficient interfaces, next-generation re-sizing are forced to become 24/7. China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "e-businesses". If you e-enable virally, you may have to harness magnetically. Imagine a combination of IIS and C++. If you drive virally, you may have to productize seamlessly. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for transforming. A company that can integrate easily will (at some point in the future) be able to matrix elegantly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think C2B2B. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! Think intuitive. China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "short-term transparent iteration". What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! If you scale perfectly, you may have to synthesize virally. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be C2B2B? Think real-world. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. If you generate globally, you may have to evolve proactively. A company that can disintermediate fiercely will (at some point) be able to target defiantly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and PHP. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our solutions but our capability to iterate. What does the jargon-based term "mega-bleeding-edge super-CAE" really mean? Without e-markets, you will lack process management. We will grow the standard industry jargon-based jargon-based term "60/24/7/365". We here at China Aviation Oil believe we know that it is better to iterate robustly than to monetize intuitively. What does the term "integrated" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become compelling? If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! We constantly seize user-centric web-enabled, real-world CAE. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will matrix the capability of metrics to leverage. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our mindshare but our power to repurpose. The capability to reintermediate virtually leads to the aptitude to cultivate compellingly. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to seize "seamlessly"?