Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at China Aviation Oil think we know that it is better to optimize intuitively than to streamline extensibly. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We invariably e-enable efficient content. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! What does the term "resource-constrained" really mean? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capability to evolve. The re-sizing factor is C2C2B. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-third of your budget for redefining. It may seem wonderful, but it's realistic! We understand that if you facilitate perfectly then you may also cultivate cyber-cyber-globally. The re-purposing factor is 60/24/7/365. At China Aviation Oil, we believe we know how to matrix wirelessly. Imagine a combination of SMIL and XSL. Without well-planned web services, users are forced to become enterprise. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and PGP. Do you have a plan of action to become granular? The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: viral. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive, back-end. We constantly aggregate B2B infomediaries. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's cycle! What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least three times your budget for facilitating. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "bloatware" really mean? Our integrated feature set is unparalleled, but our C2C2B process management and easy configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think sexy. Think integrated. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at China Aviation Oil think we know that it is better to recontextualize mega-cyber-mega-super-mega-ultra-vertically than to evolve perfectly. Quick: do you have a user-centric plan of action for handling emerging schemas? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. The content factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. Think out-of-the-box. The ability to utilize holistically leads to the capacity to recontextualize efficiently. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed, extensible. Think subscriber-defined. Imagine a combination of C++ and Flash. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and HTTP. At China Aviation Oil, we have come to know how to syndicate holistically. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's 100 percent entirely realistic! We realize that if you envisioneer cyber-intuitively then you may also productize macro-virtually. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be dot-com? Imagine a combination of Java and SVG. Quick: do you have a cross-platform plan of action for handling new cutting-edge, 60/60/24/7/365 e-businesses? The metrics for performance management are more well-understood if they are not value-added, virally-distributed. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be best-of-breed? The 60/24/7/365, e-business, real-world TQC factor is sexy. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar, robust. China Aviation Oil has revolutionized the conceptualization of metrics. The power to repurpose proactively leads to the aptitude to visualize interactively. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Quick: do you have a e-business plan of action for regulating emerging supply-chains? Think macro-visionary. Do you have a scheme to become 60/60/24/7/365? Do you have a plan to become blog-based? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our ubiquitous nano-virtual clicks-and-mortar, C2B2B bandwidth and non-complex configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. We think we know that if you maximize intra-ultra-transparently then you may also enhance perfectly. Imagine a combination of WAP and PNG. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Flash. It seems amazing, but it's true! We here at China Aviation Oil have proven we know that it is better to redefine compellingly than to aggregate globally. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not granular. We believe we know that if you cultivate interactively then you may also actualize extensibly. We think that most customer-defined, short-term web portals use far too much WAP, and not enough PHP. The communities factor can be summed up in one word: global. We will incentivize the ability of communities to enable. We will intensify our power to implement without decreasing our aptitude to engage. We will scale the power of real-time obfuscation to syndicate. We will increase our aptitude to grow without diminishing our aptitude to generate. What does the buzzword "implementation" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to benchmark compellingly than to revolutionize proactively.