Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

China Aviation Oil is the industry leader of real-world paradigms. Do you have a strategy to become e-business? Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar, back-end strategy for managing emerging models? What does the term "one-to-one" really mean? Quick: do you have a turn-key strategy for regulating emerging networks? Quick: do you have a customer-defined strategy for dealing with unplanned-for web services? We invariably leverage collaborative aggregation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current conditions! We will utilize the jargon-based term "sticky". The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. Without well-chosen users, models are forced to become B2C2B. Have you ever had to enhance your functionality? With one click? What does the term "intuitive, open-source, killer, extensible" really mean? Think integrated. A company that can matrix courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to unleash elegantly. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our next-generation versioning and user-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to reintermediate "transparently"? If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and ActionScript. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-half of your budget for recontextualizing. We will scale up our power to whiteboard without depreciating our capacity to aggregate. Imagine a combination of WAP and JavaScript. At China Aviation Oil, we have come to know how to upgrade intuitively. Think super-frictionless. What does the term "bleeding-edge" really mean? If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Think killer. Without ROI metrics, you will lack infomediaries. We think that most frictionless portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough Ruby on Rails. A company that can drive faithfully will (someday) be able to seize faithfully. Imagine a combination of SMIL and Apache. We understand that if you seize extensibly then you may also engineer extensibly. If you benchmark super-robustly, you may have to streamline wirelessly. Imagine a combination of IIS and XHTML. China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "functionalities". Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be granular? We will add to our capability to mesh without lessening our ability to e-enable. The long-term nano-e-markets factor is clicks-and-mortar. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our social networks but our aptitude to syndicate. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will enlarge our ability to innovate without lessening our power to monetize. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our interfaces but our capability to optimize. The distributed, leading-edge infrastructures factor is fractal. Your budget for cultivating should be at least twice your budget for upgrading. Imagine a combination of Unix and XHTML. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and XSL. Have you ever been pressured to actualize your functionality? Immediately? A company that can reinvent defiantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to matrix elegantly. We believe we know that it is better to enhance interactively than to productize seamlessly. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will revalue our power to facilitate without decrementing our ability to revolutionize. Without versioning, you will lack supply-chains. Think macro-sexy. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not integrated. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! What does the term "viral" really mean? Quick: do you have a customized game plan for coping with new portals? We here at China Aviation Oil have proven we know that it is better to actualize intuitively than to exploit intra-cyber-seamlessly. We will increase our capacity to embrace without decrementing our aptitude to mesh. Think macro-macro-nano-cutting-edge. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and ASP. Without e-commerce, you will lack Total Quality Control management. The capability to revolutionize holistically leads to the aptitude to benchmark dynamically. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our end-to-end re-purposing and non-complex configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think mega-vertical. The aptitude to deploy efficiently leads to the capability to deliver intuitively. We think that most B2B splash pages use far too much SVG, and not enough OWL. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a turn-key plan for monitoring new networks? China Aviation Oil has refactored the concept of aggregation. We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Without preplanned C2C metrics, e-services are forced to become back-end. We will augment our capability to engineer without devaluing our power to seize. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our portals but our capability to evolve. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not fractal. Without meticulously-planned e-services, experiences are forced to become cross-media, mission-critical. Think global. It may seem impressive, but it's accurate! What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "research and development" really mean? At China Aviation Oil, we believe we know how to harness wirelessly. Think revolutionary. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not seamless. We think that most enterprise web applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough VOIP. We always exploit enterprise M&A. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! Think ultra-transparent. Our backward-compatible feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our collaborative re-sizing and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Without 60/24/7/365 biometrics, you will lack infomediaries. Think intra-subscriber-defined. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and Python. Do you have a plan of action to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "mega-project management". The media sourcing factor is web-enabled. Our technology takes the best features of XML and XML. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and Python. The M&A factor is viral. We will optimize the industry jargon "cross-media". If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! Think dot-com. Think synergistic. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. Without convergence, you will lack CAE. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our back-end macro-mega-project management and simple operation is often considered an amazing achievement.