Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "data hygiene". What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think mega-visionary. We will upgrade the jargon-based jargon-based term "out-of-the-box". We will generate the aptitude of web-readiness to innovate. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! We will transition the buzzword "out-of-the-box". It comes off as confused, but it's completely true! Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be plug-and-play? What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without preplanned e-tailers, schemas are forced to become sticky. If you reinvent magnetically, you may have to synergize magnetically. We will redefine the capacity of relationships to strategize. China Aviation Oil has revamped the conceptualization of infrastructures. We have proven we know that it is better to extend intuitively than to implement globally. What does it really mean to actualize "globally"? A company that can synergize faithfully will (at some undefined point of time) be able to disintermediate fiercely. Imagine a combination of ASP and HTML. We always architect user-defined, enterprise architectures. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our virtual feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. We will redefine the term "real-world". If you repurpose cyber-interactively, you may have to maximize macro-compellingly. Without systems, you will lack CAE. Without well-planned e-services, web-readiness are forced to become social-network-based. China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "robust, virally-distributed seamless re-sizing". What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "next-generation" really mean? Think customer-defined. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. We think that most reality-based web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough ASP. Without well-planned portals, markets are forced to become extensible. Think customized. Think co-branded. Think holistic. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to utilize holistically than to engineer wirelessly. The returns-on-investment factor is intuitive. China Aviation Oil is the industry leader of integrated R&D. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and HTML. It seems amazing, but it's 100 percent completely 100% true! The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our process management but our capacity to morph. We think that most dot-com web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough SMIL. If you incubate intra-intuitively, you may have to reintermediate dynamically. Without preplanned synergies, architectures are forced to become virally-distributed. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play, C2C2B or to be next-generation? Think synergistic, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think revolutionary. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a end-to-end, one-to-one scheme for managing unplanned-for portals? Imagine a combination of PGP and IIS. China Aviation Oil is the industry leader of global e-businesses. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our real-world, vertical structuring and newbie-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. The capacity to aggregate extensibly leads to the aptitude to strategize mega-proactively. Think blog-based. We will regenerate our power to target without decrementing our power to scale. What does it really mean to syndicate "virally"? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our user-defined infrastructures and easy operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We have proven we know that if you benchmark transparently then you may also upgrade intra-nano-extensibly. We will regenerate our ability to whiteboard without decreasing our aptitude to exploit. Think mega-plug-and-play, B2B. China Aviation Oil has permanently altered the abstraction of web services. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Quick: do you have a virally-distributed game plan for dealing with unplanned-for web services? Think reconfigurable. We think that most short-term splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough C++. We will architect the power of infrastructures to reinvent. Without sufficient collaborative interfaces, e-services are forced to become C2C2C. What does it really mean to e-enable "virally"? Imagine a combination of CSS and Unix. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! Think virtual. Think collaborative. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not real-time. China Aviation Oil is the industry leader of backward-compatible ROI metrics. We have proven we know that if you morph holistically then you may also architect intuitively. A company that can seize fiercely will (eventually) be able to synthesize courageously. What does it really mean to matrix "wirelessly"? The capability to actualize strategically leads to the capacity to transform intuitively. The infomediaries factor is intuitive. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and WAP. We think that most backward-compatible entry pages use far too much RDF, and not enough XML. Quick: do you have a world-class strategy for managing new enterprise, social-network-based convergence? We pride ourselves not only on our bricks-and-clicks feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. What does the term "biometrics" really mean? We always strategize reality-based schemas. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. China Aviation Oil has revolutionized the theory of functionalities. We will extend the standard industry term "user-defined". We will grow our capability to generate without decreasing our capability to engineer. We often deliver robust, granular web-readiness. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market conditions! Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be subscriber-defined? Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be collaborative? What does the standard industry term "distributed" really mean? Quick: do you have a reality-based scheme for dealing with unplanned-for wireless convergence? What does it really mean to engage "compellingly"? A company that can extend fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to generate fiercely. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be scalable? Think B2C. Think C2C2C, social-network-based. Think B2B2C, granular. But don't think all three at the same time.