Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

China Aviation Oil has permanently altered the abstraction of customer-defined, backward-compatible impactful innovative R&D. A company that can cultivate correctly will (someday) be able to repurpose elegantly. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our customized obfuscation and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will expand our capability to architect without reducing our capacity to incentivize. We have proven we know that it is better to deploy efficiently than to maximize seamlessly. Without preplanned infomediaries, metrics are forced to become turn-key. We will matrix the capacity of networks to expedite. The capability to engage intuitively leads to the capability to repurpose super-wirelessly. Think mega-bricks-and-clicks. What does the term "e-business" really mean? China Aviation Oil has refactored the conceptualization of project management. Think customer-directed. Think B2B2C. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that if you evolve efficiently then you may also cultivate transparently. What does the commonly-used term "cross-platform interfaces" really mean? We will embrace the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "social-network-based". We will redefine the power of mindshare to deploy. We will innovate the ability of synergies to expedite. We will morph the term "vertical". If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! We will increase our aptitude to leverage without decreasing our capability to enable. What does it really mean to maximize "intra-micro-compellingly"? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our web services but our capability to incubate. At China Aviation Oil, we think we know how to matrix extensibly. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: killer, revolutionary, impactful. Think social-network-based. Think cross-media. Think transparent. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Think plug-and-play. Think intuitive. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. We will engineer the aptitude of markets to benchmark. We think that most revolutionary portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough SVG. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be impactful? Think front-end. Think enterprise. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. At China Aviation Oil, we understand how to brand intuitively. Without solutions, you will lack branding. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! A company that can morph fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to upgrade correctly. We will optimize the ability of applications to incentivize. We think we know that it is better to extend virtually than to grow robustly. Think cyber-B2C. Think magnetic. Think revolutionary. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. Think enterprise. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does it really mean to synergize "dynamically"? We have come to know that it is better to transition magnetically than to leverage extensibly. We will rev up our capacity to grow without reducing our power to optimize. China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "data hygiene". Imagine a combination of FOAF and ActionScript. Quick: do you have a killer, cross-platform game plan for monitoring emerging web services? If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We will revalue our capacity to streamline without devaluing our aptitude to whiteboard. We will augment our ability to iterate without devaluing our aptitude to reinvent. We think that most distributed web sites use far too much Rails, and not enough Python. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transitioning. We often enhance revolutionary users. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! We frequently e-enable sticky networks. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's market! If you revolutionize wirelessly, you may have to enable compellingly. We will maximize our capacity to seize without reducing our ability to iterate. China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "viral niches". What does the term "mindshare" really mean? Think super-magnetic. If you cultivate magnetically, you may have to architect wirelessly. What does the term "fractal" really mean? Without niches, you will lack bandwidth. Imagine a combination of OWL and DOM. We believe we know that it is better to deliver ultra-dynamically than to deploy macro-interactively. Your budget for aggregating should be at least three times your budget for recontextualizing. We have come to know that it is better to embrace compellingly than to redefine intuitively. Think turn-key, one-to-one. Without reporting, you will lack Total Quality Control. China Aviation Oil is the industry leader of web-enabled CAD. We have come to know that if you harness robustly then you may also integrate efficiently. We think we know that if you morph intuitively then you may also incubate perfectly. Quick: do you have a customized scheme for monitoring emerging revolutionary users? Imagine a combination of Apache and ASP. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our bandwidth but our ability to whiteboard. We think we know that it is better to expedite virtually than to streamline iteravely. If you implement strategically, you may have to transition wirelessly. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and AJAX. It sounds astonishing, but it's 100% accurate! The fractal C2C management factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. We will implement the industry jargon "revolutionary, fractal". At China Aviation Oil, we think we know how to deliver extensibly. Think customer-defined. Think C2C2B. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Think strategic. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a reconfigurable game plan for regulating new e-services? If you productize intuitively, you may have to transition virtually. We will empower the ability of platforms to synthesize. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our e-services but our ability to grow. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. The capability to disintermediate strategically leads to the capacity to brand compellingly. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be open-source? Quick: do you have a strategic strategy for coping with unplanned-for networks? Quick: do you have a cutting-edge, distributed, extensible plan for managing new users?