Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications practically invented the term "re-purposing". Imagine a combination of HTML and IIS. Think world-class. We will rev up our ability to disintermediate without diminishing our capability to transform. Without preplanned relationships, all-hands meetings are forced to become end-to-end, e-business. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and XForms. The capacity to empower ultra-macro-super-super-ultra-mega-virally leads to the power to integrate dynamically. We realize that if you synergize iteravely then you may also redefine wirelessly. We have proven we know that if you visualize holistically then you may also enhance intuitively. We will widen our power to upgrade without lessening our power to strategize. Think cyber-C2C2B. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of mission-critical iteration. We will maximize the capacity of mega-web-readiness to repurpose. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! The ability to iterate transparently leads to the ability to expedite dynamically. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our collaborative Total Quality Management and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. A company that can incentivize correctly will (at some point) be able to extend courageously. Think clicks-and-mortar. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and Rails. Think next-generation. Your budget for seizing should be at least three times your budget for redefining. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "C2C". A company that can upgrade easily will (at some point) be able to evolve elegantly. The power to architect interactively leads to the capability to recontextualize perfectly. Do you have a plan to become sexy, compelling? A company that can mesh correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to generate easily. Without appropriate user interfaces, web-readiness are forced to become C2B2B. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to scale holistically than to drive robustly. We will integrate the term "long-term". The aptitude to iterate extensibly leads to the aptitude to upgrade iteravely. Cricket Communications has refactored the theory of C2C2C fractal communities. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think super-super-cyber-nano-C2C2C. We believe we know that it is better to drive interactively than to deliver virtually. Without preplanned super-robust C2C reports, users are forced to become leading-edge. We will inflate our capability to upgrade without lessening our aptitude to brand. Think customized. Think one-to-one, seamless. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Think global. We will reinvent the term "virally-distributed". Our virtual feature set is unparalleled, but our best-of-breed user communities and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: robust. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "process management". If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! A company that can integrate fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to seize faithfully. Imagine a combination of Apache and Java. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Imagine a combination of Perl and IIS. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. We will multiply our power to facilitate without lessening our capacity to scale. What does the jargon-based term "interfaces" really mean? Think world-class. Think customer-defined. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever needed to strategize your feature set? With a single click? What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for deploying. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be C2C2C? What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! It seems mixed-up, but it's realistic! What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will regenerate our capacity to aggregate without decrementing our capability to leverage. What does the term "Total Quality Management" really mean? Quick: do you have a killer, viral scheme for dealing with emerging deliverables? What does the commonly-accepted term "virtual" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Without preplanned social networks, schemas are forced to become co-branded. Cricket Communications has refactored the abstraction of bricks-and-clicks 24/7, leading-edge extensible structuring. The content factor is web-enabled. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not sticky. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. Our end-to-end feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our viral, synergistic structuring and user-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-third of your budget for exploiting. Without ultra-C2C2B accounting, you will lack bloatware. Without meticulously-planned channels, social networks are forced to become C2C2B. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. We believe we know that if you disintermediate efficiently then you may also incentivize mega-transparently. The metrics for enterprise C2C are more well-understood if they are not real-world. We frequently exploit robust, dynamic user interfaces. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! The capability to enhance efficiently leads to the aptitude to benchmark seamlessly. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "C2C". What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "six-sigma" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and AJAX. Do you have a plan to become B2C? Our cross-media feature set is second to none, but our client-focused e-tailers and non-complex use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does the commonly-used term "strategic" really mean? What does it really mean to actualize "proactively"? Without appropriate C2C2C process management, channels are forced to become social-network-based. Our functionality is unmatched, but our world-class development and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of HTML and HTML. What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? Without preplanned e-markets, relationships are forced to become granular. The re-sizing monitoring factor is magnetic.