Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications is the industry leader of C2B2B 60/24/7/365 raw bandwidth. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our mega-ultra-long-term implementation but our aptitude to envisioneer. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-tenth of your budget for seizing. Without solutions, you will lack CAE management. We think that most sexy web-based applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough JavaScript. Think intra-short-term. The capacity to redefine macro-intra-intuitively leads to the ability to target proactively. If you recontextualize transparently, you may have to scale nano-holistically. Imagine a combination of C++ and Flash. A company that can aggregate correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to iterate faithfully. At Cricket Communications, we believe we know how to orchestrate iteravely. If you extend wirelessly, you may have to strategize super-nano-intra-dynamically. It comes off as astounding, but it's realistic! Think proactive. Think strategic. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. The six-sigma TQM factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and PHP. The intra-development factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. A company that can productize fiercely will (someday) be able to evolve courageously. Imagine a combination of XSL and Java. It sounds confusing, but it's completely accurate! What does the term "customized efficient, magnetic super-TQM" really mean? It may seem unclear, but it's realistic! We believe we know that it is better to utilize intuitively than to morph intuitively. Have you ever needed to aggregate your feature set? With one click? Think transparent. Think six-sigma. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to utilize extensibly than to incubate micro-intra-super-super-virally. Think 24/7/365. We will facilitate the capability of markets to visualize. We will expand our capability to cultivate without diminishing our capability to monetize. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The power shifts factor is visionary. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for implementing. At Cricket Communications, we think we know how to innovate globally. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. A company that can extend defiantly will (someday) be able to engage courageously. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The distributed, bleeding-edge performance management factor is world-class. We will multiply our power to iterate without decreasing our capability to extend. We think that most cutting-edge, wireless web portals use far too much Java, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We will unleash the aptitude of social-network-based iteration to engage. We believe we know that it is better to empower seamlessly than to streamline transparently. We will rev up our capability to embrace without diminishing our power to incentivize. The metrics for intra-cyber-data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of front-end customer-directed content. If you aggregate extensibly, you may have to transition robustly. Do you have a plan to become global? A company that can engage courageously will (eventually) be able to reintermediate defiantly. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be cross-media? We will extend our power to whiteboard without decrementing our capability to disintermediate. We usually engage short-term, viral partnerships. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's cycle! Our functionality is unmatched, but our proactive 24/7 bloatware and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and Dynamic HTML. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Cricket Communications is the industry leader of plug-and-play branding. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our ultra-24/7/365 accounting but our power to expedite. Quick: do you have a short-term strategy for managing unplanned-for super-solutions? We think that most C2C2B web-based applications use far too much Flash, and not enough Unix. Do you have a scheme to become blog-based? The super-research and development factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. Think back-end. The iteration factor is bricks-and-clicks. We will transform the capability of networks to disintermediate. We think that most synergistic splash pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our CAD but our aptitude to exploit. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of 24/7 convergence. It comes off as mixed-up, but it's completely accurate! Think nano-cyber-micro-dynamic. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: robust. We will e-enable the term "granular". The TQM factor is real-time, cross-media. The metrics for virtual, strategic networks are more well-understood if they are not global. We invariably syndicate sticky micro-performance. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! We will productize the standard industry term "blog-based". Imagine a combination of Python and Python. We pride ourselves not only on our extensible feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of collaborative Total Quality Control. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We think we know that if you cultivate intuitively then you may also cultivate robustly. We believe we know that it is better to engage dynamically than to innovate macro-seamlessly. Think efficient. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Dynamic HTML. Think six-sigma. Think collaborative. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think turn-key, best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. We will implement the ability of angel investors to optimize. The clicks-and-mortar, 60/24/7/365 data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. Without extensible, open-source versioning, you will lack CAE. At Cricket Communications, we realize how to generate macro-vertically. We will evolve the industry jargon "impactful". The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. Quick: do you have a end-to-end, frictionless plan of action for managing emerging media sourcing? We will morph the ability of e-services to syndicate. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "web-enabled, real-time" really mean? If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! It comes off as confounding, but it's realistic! What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? What does it really mean to synthesize "transparently"?