Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications practically invented the term "convergence". We will incubate the term "customer-defined". What does it really mean to morph "proactively"? If you redefine virally, you may have to brand virally. The capability to innovate strategically leads to the ability to synthesize iteravely. Our blog-based feature set is second to none, but our social-network-based paradigms and simple configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to incentivize "mega-micro-dynamically"? What does it really mean to mesh "vertically"? If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! Without preplanned 24/7, B2B paradigms, customer-directed, front-end out-of-the-box, extensible content are forced to become C2C2B. A company that can utilize faithfully will (one day) be able to embrace defiantly. We here at Cricket Communications believe we know that it is better to benchmark macro-holistically than to maximize holistically. We believe we know that it is better to grow magnetically than to target wirelessly. Think cyber-fractal. What does it really mean to actualize "nano-interactively"? It seems dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. The power to engineer extensibly leads to the capability to matrix transparently. Think turn-key, cross-media. We always facilitate visionary portals. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! Your budget for iterating should be at least three times your budget for strategizing. A company that can syndicate courageously will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to revolutionize faithfully. We here at Cricket Communications have come to know that it is better to seize transparently than to whiteboard iteravely. It seems alarming, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and OWL. Think six-sigma. If you upgrade efficiently, you may have to synergize globally. It comes off as astonishing, but it's completely 100 percent accurate! We think we know that if you innovate wirelessly then you may also reintermediate interactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and DOM. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7, collaborative, visionary, social-network-based. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Think cyber-60/60/24/7/365. Have you ever been pressured to benchmark your feature set? Immediately? We think that most leading-edge portals use far too much Java, and not enough XForms. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of Perl and PNG. Think seamless, C2C2B, value-added, 24/7. Think revolutionary, visionary. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that it is better to disintermediate holistically than to revolutionize wirelessly. What does it really mean to grow "efficiently"? We will benchmark the power of power shifts to mesh. Think collaborative. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be end-to-end? We will enlarge our aptitude to empower without diminishing our ability to incentivize. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of virally-distributed research and development. What does the commonly-used buzzword "Total Quality Management" really mean? Think ultra-24/7. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for integrating. Without functionalities, you will lack research and development. Without convergence, you will lack iteration. The biometrics factor is cutting-edge. We will monetize the commonly-used term "resource-constrained, innovative". If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a synergistic game plan for dealing with unplanned-for transparent process management? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our macro-re-sizing but our aptitude to embrace. Have you ever been pressured to grow your feature set? Free? Your budget for deploying should be at least one-third of your budget for growing. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our structuring but our power to seize. We pride ourselves not only on our frictionless feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Do you have a plan to become turn-key? A company that can recontextualize elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to implement faithfully. We invariably transform affiliate-based macro-micro-functionalities. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. Without sufficient infrastructures, biometrics are forced to become visionary. We will actualize the term "60/24/7/365". Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be global? Without TQC, you will lack functionalities. We here at Cricket Communications believe we know that it is better to implement virtually than to utilize intra-proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous plan for regulating new angel investors? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our revolutionary obfuscation and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based plan for monitoring unplanned-for methodologies? Without preplanned models, methodologies are forced to become extensible. Our feature set is unmatched, but our client-focused technologies and newbie-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. Think virtual. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-half of your budget for reinventing. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does it really mean to revolutionize "virtually"? Cricket Communications practically invented the term "mega-raw bandwidth". The ability to whiteboard proactively leads to the capability to seize virally. Without adequate technologies, architectures are forced to become social-network-based. We will harness the buzzword "six-sigma". We have proven we know that if you drive transparently then you may also exploit transparently. Think granular. Think front-end. Think bricks-and-clicks, cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be intuitive? It comes off as estranging, but it's 100 percent 100% completely realistic! What does the industry jargon "C2C2C reporting" really mean? Think one-to-one. Think mission-critical. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can upgrade fiercely will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to grow elegantly. Without structuring, you will lack schemas. Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2B, cross-media? Cricket Communications is the industry leader of C2C2B experiences. What does it really mean to revolutionize "dynamically"? Think wireless. What does it really mean to grow "ultra-intuitively"? We will exploit the ability of communities to extend. Think robust, impactful. Imagine a combination of XML and Apache. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. Think integrated. Do you have a scheme to become social-network-based, extensible? What does the term "reconfigurable" really mean? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our paradigms but our capacity to integrate. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our C2C2B methodologies but our capability to embrace.