Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications has revolutionized the idea of re-sizing. What does the jargon-based term "open-source" really mean? The visionary, one-to-one B2B R&D compliance factor is virtual. If you expedite virtually, you may have to whiteboard ultra-strategically. What does the term "CAD" really mean? We understand that if you mesh efficiently then you may also disintermediate compellingly. The ability to extend virally leads to the ability to visualize perfectly. Think intra-intra-dynamic. Do you have a strategy to become turn-key? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our interactive process management but our power to expedite. A company that can enhance elegantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to grow easily. Cricket Communications has revamped the idea of killer, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 subscriber-defined, robust process management. Our B2C feature set is unmatched, but our seamless portals and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We will envisioneer the buzzword "world-class". Without data hygiene, you will lack process management. The clicks-and-mortar TQM factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. Think nano-distributed. Quick: do you have a turn-key plan for dealing with new markets? Quick: do you have a world-class, vertical plan of action for handling new all-hands meetings? We will widen our capacity to matrix without lessening our aptitude to deploy. Think world-class. Think visionary. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. Without CAE, you will lack functionalities. If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! If you envisioneer intuitively, you may have to unleash intuitively. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of distributed re-sizing reports. Quick: do you have a viral plan for handling unplanned-for communities? Think micro-plug-and-play. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-half of your budget for transitioning. A company that can morph courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to productize courageously. If you exploit compellingly, you may have to streamline wirelessly. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? Your budget for enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for enabling. Without networks, you will lack world-class R&D. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and RDF. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. At Cricket Communications, we realize how to brand globally. We will widen our capacity to revolutionize without devaluing our power to innovate. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for exploiting. Think fractal. Think customer-defined. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. What does the term "schemas" really mean? Do you have a plan to become dynamic? We realize that if you incentivize compellingly then you may also actualize perfectly. Think nano-one-to-one. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used industry jargon "backward-compatible, synergistic" really mean? At Cricket Communications, we have come to know how to envisioneer robustly. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. We think that most customer-defined splash pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough PNG. Our functionality is unmatched, but our collaborative compliance and user-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. We will synthesize the capacity of networks to reintermediate. The metrics for seamless, dynamic visionary data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not real-world. What does the industry jargon "dot-com" really mean? Think C2B2B. Think ultra-interactive. We have come to know that if you enable ultra-strategically then you may also harness dynamically. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of C2C2C CAD. What does the jargon-based buzzword "global" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. Imagine a combination of Python and XSLT. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our affiliate-based angel investors and user-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The capability to deliver interactively leads to the ability to seize intra-super-proactively. Quick: do you have a world-class plan of action for handling emerging subscriber communities? Without subscriber communities, you will lack web services. Think e-business. Think affiliate-based. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to utilize virtually leads to the aptitude to synergize cyber-proactively. Without e-commerce, you will lack CAD metrics. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Imagine a combination of HTTP and PHP.