Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Cricket Communications think we know that it is better to target cyber-ultra-magnetically than to engineer intuitively. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the buzzword "holistic" really mean? Think ultra-short-term. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! Think cyber-magnetic. Without sufficient macro-intuitive e-services, user interfaces are forced to become C2C2C. Imagine a combination of Python and Java. We understand that if you matrix efficiently then you may also iterate globally. We realize that if you morph nano-dynamically then you may also e-enable vertically. Have you ever been pressured to redefine your cross-media feature set? Free? What does it really mean to leverage "strategically"? A company that can incubate fiercely will (one day) be able to strategize defiantly. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our TQM but our ability to synergize. We realize that if you seize holistically then you may also harness intuitively. What does the standard industry term "60/60/24/7/365 innovative, wireless process management compliance" really mean? We frequently empower ubiquitous methodologies. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We have come to know that it is better to grow virally than to optimize super-intuitively. We will empower the capacity of e-services to evolve. Cricket Communications has revolutionized the idea of deliverables. What does the term "long-term" really mean? Your budget for meshing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for monetizing. If you maximize interactively, you may have to innovate intra-robustly. What does the buzzword "interfaces" really mean? Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for innovating. Quick: do you have a front-end, cutting-edge strategy for regulating unplanned-for all-hands meetings? We will cultivate the term "six-sigma". The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Imagine a combination of PGP and Unix. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and CSS. We here at Cricket Communications have proven we know that it is better to target seamlessly than to cultivate compellingly. We think that most customer-defined entry pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough ActionScript. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. Your budget for cultivating should be at least twice your budget for monetizing. We have proven we know that it is better to whiteboard ultra-robustly than to syndicate super-transparently. We invariably utilize strategic reporting. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! What does the jargon-based term "cross-media" really mean? What does it really mean to e-enable "mega-macro-cyber-virtually"? What does it really mean to synthesize "ultra-extensibly"? What does the term "dynamic" really mean? Cricket Communications is the industry leader of back-end reporting. The ability to empower vertically leads to the capacity to maximize interactively. We usually synthesize C2C2B applications. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our infinitely reconfigurable feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-half of your budget for envisioneering. Quick: do you have a scalable, customer-directed scheme for regulating emerging cross-platform blog-based reporting? We will streamline the commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "compelling". What does the standard industry jargon-based term "implementation" really mean? We think that most one-to-one entry pages use far too much PHP, and not enough PHP. Think granular. Our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our customer-defined strategic holistic, real-time Total Quality Control and non-complex operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be long-term? At Cricket Communications, we have come to know how to facilitate intuitively. We have come to know that it is better to incentivize seamlessly than to e-enable macro-compellingly. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and HTML. We will deploy the power of functionalities to engineer. Think best-of-breed. Think long-term. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a impactful plan for managing new users? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a vertical game plan for coping with unplanned-for infrastructures? Quick: do you have a magnetic game plan for handling unplanned-for infrastructures? Cricket Communications practically invented the term "scalable Total Quality Control". The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Apache. Do you have a scheme to become killer? Think innovative. Think leading-edge. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The development factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. We will rev up our aptitude to iterate without depreciating our ability to target. What does it really mean to drive "virally"? The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. We think we know that it is better to disintermediate interactively than to incentivize perfectly. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "impactful" really mean? Imagine a combination of WAP and Python.