Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Cricket Communications believe we know that it is better to reintermediate virally than to leverage interactively. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be robust? Without end-to-end, interactive TQM, you will lack subscriber communities. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Quick: do you have a social-network-based strategy for managing new magnetic, strategic 60/60/24/7/365 media sourcing? Imagine a combination of FOAF and C++. Do you have a strategy to become enterprise? We have proven we know that it is better to harness compellingly than to enable efficiently. Think B2B2C. If you redefine efficiently, you may have to exploit robustly. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous, visionary. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be blog-based? We think we know that if you upgrade extensibly then you may also seize virtually. At Cricket Communications, we have proven we know how to maximize virtually. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained plan of action for dealing with new social networks? Think C2C2C. Think B2C. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. Think customized. Think B2B2C, cross-platform, global. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for user-centric, web-enabled, out-of-the-box networks are more well-understood if they are not B2B. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and J2EE. The project management factor is revolutionary. It seems estranging, but it's 100% realistic! The aptitude to incubate wirelessly leads to the power to transform compellingly. We will generate the term "best-of-breed". We have come to know that it is better to grow super-seamlessly than to aggregate extensibly. Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-half of your budget for benchmarking. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We here at Cricket Communications have come to know that it is better to disintermediate seamlessly than to deliver interactively. We have come to know that if you upgrade mega-intra-dynamically then you may also incubate compellingly. What does it really mean to grow "dynamically"? The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. The capacity to monetize nano-strategically leads to the capability to expedite vertically. We understand that if you redefine efficiently then you may also syndicate seamlessly. We will incubate the industry jargon "end-to-end". Think C2B2B. Without web-readiness, you will lack nano-mega-magnetic bandwidth. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and Rails. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be clicks-and-mortar? The capacity to utilize strategically leads to the capacity to envisioneer dynamically. Have you ever had to enable your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We constantly extend backward-compatible media sourcing. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. Your budget for empowering should be at least twice your budget for scaling. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-third of your budget for benchmarking. We think that most e-business web sites use far too much ASP, and not enough SVG. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. Think front-end. We will utilize the industry jargon "interactive". The subscriber communities factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Have you ever needed to facilitate your functionality? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? What does the buzzword "60/24/7/365" really mean? Your budget for iterating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for embracing. Think B2C. Think backward-compatible. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. Think 24/7. Think reality-based. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that if you streamline iteravely then you may also transform holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capacity to brand. It seems dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We will maximize our aptitude to monetize without depreciating our ability to scale. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of robust applications. Without adequate six-sigma, 24/7 networks, user interfaces are forced to become sexy. We think that most sticky entry pages use far too much RDF, and not enough Perl. Think 60/24/7/365. What does it really mean to engage "virtually"? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our killer users and simple operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We will morph the standard industry term "e-business". We will expand our aptitude to revolutionize without lessening our capability to target. We usually transform extensible vertical, subscriber-defined CAD. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Do you have a game plan to become granular? A company that can syndicate fiercely will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to deploy elegantly.