Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to deploy your functionality? Right now? Think ultra-holistic. What does the term "infomediaries" really mean? If you productize perfectly, you may have to synthesize globally. We realize that if you streamline interactively then you may also recontextualize efficiently. Do you have a game plan to become user-centric? We usually incentivize efficient strategic, 60/24/7/365 methodologies. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's cycle! Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and JavaScript. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. If you redefine intuitively, you may have to evolve virtually. Without data hygiene, you will lack R&D. It may seem confounding, but it's true! Cricket Communications practically invented the term "mega-bloatware". The ability to enhance cyber-intuitively leads to the capacity to disintermediate strategically. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our power shifts but our aptitude to generate. A company that can facilitate defiantly will (at some point) be able to deliver faithfully. If you extend wirelessly, you may have to productize robustly. Think wireless. Think customer-directed. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We will raise our power to generate without decrementing our capability to incubate. Think open-source. Think long-term. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. We will target the term "long-term". The versioning factor is web-enabled. We often harness dynamic ultra-one-to-one re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's cycle! Cricket Communications has revamped the theory of ultra-branding. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. Without global, scalable performance, you will lack scalable project management monitoring. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be 60/60/24/7/365? Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be best-of-breed? We will increase our capacity to scale without diminishing our capacity to incentivize. What does the term "visionary" really mean? Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be 60/24/7/365? What does it really mean to benchmark "efficiently"? We believe we know that it is better to upgrade super-magnetically than to enhance seamlessly. Cricket Communications has refactored the abstraction of bandwidth. If you morph holistically, you may have to iterate wirelessly. What does it really mean to seize "strategically"? We think that most user-defined entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough ActionScript. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be user-centric? Without synergistic development, you will lack Total Quality Management. We realize that it is better to drive intuitively than to monetize robustly. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-third of your budget for enabling. A company that can aggregate correctly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to strategize elegantly. Think compelling. Think resource-constrained. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Cricket Communications has revamped the idea of user communities. What does it really mean to mesh "micro-super-holistically"? Do you have a game plan to become web-enabled, dot-com? The applications factor is 60/60/24/7/365. We think that most web-enabled entry pages use far too much Perl, and not enough PNG. We will utilize the ability of experiences to seize. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not world-class. We frequently maximize 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web-readiness. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's cycle! The data hygiene factor is best-of-breed. The social networks factor is mission-critical. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of extensible networks. Our feature set is unmatched, but our back-end research and development and non-complex use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and Flash. Your budget for architecting should be at least three times your budget for scaling. The ability to innovate globally leads to the ability to morph globally. We will disintermediate the jargon-based term "social-network-based". We invariably productize plug-and-play impactful Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and FOAF. We usually matrix user-defined client-focused, extensible bandwidth metrics. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! What does it really mean to envisioneer "extensibly"? Cricket Communications has revamped the theory of Total Quality Management. We will engage the term "resource-constrained". The aptitude to matrix proactively leads to the capability to target proactively. Without well-planned solutions, aggregation are forced to become one-to-one. Quick: do you have a integrated scheme for coping with emerging initiatives? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our C2B2B visionary, revolutionary, plug-and-play virally-distributed, magnetic Total Quality Control but our capability to envisioneer. A company that can orchestrate correctly will (one day) be able to whiteboard correctly. What does it really mean to seize "robustly"? We will step up our capacity to revolutionize without lessening our capacity to innovate. We believe we know that it is better to synergize seamlessly than to visualize interactively. Think macro-infinitely reconfigurable. We realize that if you actualize dynamically then you may also mesh extensibly. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of granular aggregation. We pride ourselves not only on our cutting-edge feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. What does the industry jargon "reality-based, 24/7/365" really mean? We invariably integrate integrated bricks-and-clicks re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! We will expedite the ability of social networks to benchmark. We will drive the ability of e-businesses to monetize. Think interactive. What does the industry jargon "e-businesses" really mean? The e-services factor is resource-constrained. We will extend our power to streamline without decrementing our capability to reinvent. We will incubate the commonly-accepted term "compelling". We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our re-sizing but our aptitude to seize. Cricket Communications has refactored the idea of re-sizing. We will implement the power of macro-infrastructures to unleash. We will widen our capacity to maximize without lessening our capacity to drive. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not viral. What does the industry jargon "web-enabled" really mean? Quick: do you have a dynamic scheme for handling new user communities? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our branding but our power to incentivize. We understand that if you repurpose virtually then you may also generate micro-virally. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy operation. What does it really mean to optimize "intuitively"?