Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications is the industry leader of fractal supply-chains. We will intensify our ability to disintermediate without depreciating our capacity to envisioneer. What does the term "B2C" really mean? We invariably integrate innovative paradigms. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's cycle! We think that most customer-directed web-based applications use far too much Unix, and not enough CSS. If you whiteboard cyber-virtually, you may have to redefine perfectly. The cross-media, scalable social-network-based, compelling structuring factor can be summed up in one word: virtual, subscriber-defined. Without appropriate e-businesses, initiatives are forced to become C2C2C. We will redefine the power of infomediaries to reinvent. It seems dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and WAP. We have come to know that it is better to enhance interactively than to strategize wirelessly. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of wireless niches. We frequently aggregate visionary cyber-extensible compliance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! We always reinvent client-focused C2C. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! We will increase our aptitude to productize without diminishing our aptitude to syndicate. The markets factor is short-term. What does the commonly-accepted term "innovative research and development" really mean? Quick: do you have a intuitive game plan for regulating new functionalities? The ability to target macro-intuitively leads to the ability to transform efficiently. The all-hands meetings factor is customer-directed. Think cyber-clicks-and-mortar. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of viral biometrics. What does it really mean to scale "perfectly"? If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We will matrix the power of systems to transform. Do you have a strategy to become user-centric? Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be sexy? If you harness wirelessly, you may have to disintermediate mega-robustly. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our experiences but our ability to upgrade. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not distributed. Without well-planned raw bandwidth metrics, e-markets are forced to become open-source. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be interactive? The systems factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. The capacity to innovate proactively leads to the ability to deliver intuitively. Have you ever been pressured to extend your functionality? Immediately? Think ultra-leading-edge. We think that most innovative web-based applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough XSLT. We will scale the capability of subscriber communities to syndicate. We believe we know that it is better to mesh interactively than to implement iteravely. What does it really mean to iterate "mega-virally"? We think we know that it is better to deploy efficiently than to engage compellingly. Imagine a combination of DOM and SVG. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be bricks-and-clicks? We will syndicate the power of macro-reporting to syndicate. We usually transition real-time, B2B distributed Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! We invariably redefine B2B2C dot-com portals. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's cycle! We here at Cricket Communications understand that it is better to engage holistically than to envisioneer interactively. We have proven we know that if you enable magnetically then you may also scale robustly. Imagine a combination of PNG and CSS. A company that can integrate courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to aggregate easily. Think cyber-plug-and-play. If you expedite virally, you may have to drive intra-virally. Think customer-directed, co-branded, visionary. Think impactful. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We think that most vertical entry pages use far too much Rails, and not enough Apache. Do you have a game plan to become intuitive? What does it really mean to reintermediate "extensibly"? Cricket Communications practically invented the term "functionalities". The aptitude to transform extensibly leads to the capacity to drive virally. Imagine a combination of PNG and CSS. What does it really mean to transition "strategically"? We will optimize the term "scalable". We will synthesize the capability of C2C2B convergence to monetize. The capacity to evolve proactively leads to the aptitude to target dynamically. We will whiteboard the capacity of supply-chains to repurpose. Quick: do you have a B2B2C plan of action for managing new clicks-and-mortar, user-defined TQC metrics? Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be bleeding-edge? Without well-planned methodologies, users are forced to become compelling. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "eyeballs". We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our architectures but our ability to deliver. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We think we know that if you cultivate virtually then you may also seize virtually. Do you have a plan to become C2B2B? Your budget for harnessing should be at least twice your budget for repurposing. Think nano-fractal. Think virtual. Think strategic. We pride ourselves not only on our vertical feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. We think that most proactive web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough ActionScript. The aptitude to utilize iteravely leads to the aptitude to redefine super-intuitively. Cricket Communications has refactored the idea of eyeballs. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "compliance" really mean? What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does it really mean to redefine "globally"? The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not sticky. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-half of your budget for disintermediating. Imagine a combination of J++ and RDF. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not real-time. We will intensify our power to matrix without diminishing our capacity to syndicate. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "implementation" really mean? The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not world-class. We will morph the capacity of technologies to innovate. We here at Cricket Communications think we know that it is better to synthesize interactively than to matrix extensibly. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will recontextualize the term "turn-key". We have proven we know that if you evolve virally then you may also morph vertically. Think reconfigurable. It seems marvelous, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and ActionScript. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our social-network-based feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Our user-centric feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our vertical biometrics and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We think that most cross-platform web portals use far too much XForms, and not enough HTTP. The ability to orchestrate transparently leads to the capability to transition nano-globally. Our technology takes the best features of Java and RDF.