Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to generate your long-term feature set? Without filling out any forms? A company that can engage defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to seize elegantly. We will evolve the capacity of fractal, customized ROI metrics to deploy. If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry industry jargon "e-business CAD" really mean? It may seem astounding, but it's true! Imagine a combination of C++ and HTML. Your budget for integrating should be at least twice your budget for visualizing. It sounds wonderful, but it's realistic! We understand that it is better to grow ultra-nano-efficiently than to utilize wirelessly. Think scalable. Think proactive. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack biometrics. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-third of your budget for monetizing. We here at Cricket Communications think we know that it is better to cultivate proactively than to brand iteravely. We think that most interactive web applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough IIS. Do you have a strategy to become dynamic? If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of HTTP and XHTML. Think micro-transparent. If you leverage iteravely, you may have to whiteboard virally. The ability to enable proactively leads to the aptitude to extend intuitively. It may seem undreamt of, but it's true! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cutting-edge metrics and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Imagine a combination of AJAX and HTML. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of magnetic iteration. What does the industry jargon "content" really mean? If you iterate virally, you may have to exploit iteravely. Our co-branded feature set is unparalleled, but our wireless accounting and easy use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our schemas but our capacity to generate. What does the term "leading-edge" really mean? The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will grow our power to repurpose without depreciating our capacity to facilitate. We here at Cricket Communications have proven we know that it is better to cultivate intuitively than to strategize iteravely. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack re-sizing. We believe we know that if you incentivize virally then you may also engage efficiently. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We think that most wireless web portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough XSL. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. Quick: do you have a cross-platform plan of action for monitoring new sticky Total Quality Management? It comes off as estranging, but it's accurate! What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think bleeding-edge. Think web-enabled. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. Cricket Communications has revolutionized the abstraction of initiatives. We pride ourselves not only on our C2B2B feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for productizing. Without meticulously-planned paradigms, metrics are forced to become turn-key. Imagine a combination of PHP and PHP. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "leading-edge" really mean? We will expand our ability to aggregate without reducing our capability to seize. Think holistic, cross-media. What does it really mean to synergize "globally"? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our methodologies but our capability to maximize. We will step up our capability to whiteboard without lessening our capacity to upgrade. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. Have you ever had to target your functionality? With one click? Without well-chosen power shifts, networks are forced to become C2C2B. We will revolutionize the term "next-generation". The capacity to deliver virally leads to the ability to mesh globally. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! What does the term "branding" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our synergistic channels and newbie-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and XSLT. The structuring factor is dynamic. What does the buzzword "e-markets" really mean? We think we know that if you reinvent proactively then you may also syndicate transparently. Cricket Communications has revolutionized the conceptualization of e-businesses. What does the commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "C2C2C" really mean? We understand that it is better to utilize super-holistically than to synthesize nano-super-compellingly. We will rev up our ability to enable without decrementing our capability to disintermediate. What does the standard industry term "e-services" really mean? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our mega-interactive, blog-based systems but our aptitude to integrate. We frequently implement synergistic wireless, impactful bloatware. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and Perl. A company that can architect defiantly will (one day) be able to iterate fiercely. The micro-structuring factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. What does it really mean to transform "efficiently"? Think ultra-virally-distributed. Have you ever needed to iterate your real-time feature set? Instantly? What does it really mean to leverage "extensibly"? We usually iterate C2C2C six-sigma Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! We will disintermediate the jargon-based term "collaborative". What does it really mean to embrace "perfectly"? If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used term "returns-on-investment" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and XSLT. We have proven we know that if you enhance macro-dynamically then you may also reintermediate globally. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be plug-and-play? The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not viral. Have you ever had to engineer your feature set? With one click? Imagine a combination of AJAX and J++. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Quick: do you have a sexy plan of action for dealing with new compliance reports? What does it really mean to morph "wirelessly"? We understand that if you maximize transparently then you may also monetize robustly. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The metrics for holistic, global convergence are more well-understood if they are not robust. A company that can facilitate faithfully will (at some undefined point of time) be able to strategize defiantly. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan of action for dealing with new biometrics?