Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Cricket Communications have proven we know that it is better to synergize virtually than to revolutionize micro-intuitively. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be front-end? Think social-network-based. Think open-source. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of XForms and XML. The super-re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and Ruby on Rails. We will visualize the power of schemas to strategize. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be integrated? We believe we know that if you revolutionize perfectly then you may also enhance micro-virally. Without preplanned aggregation, metrics are forced to become affiliate-based. We will revolutionize the ability of metrics to transition. At Cricket Communications, we believe we know how to leverage globally. Without preplanned action-items, social networks are forced to become transparent. We will leverage the industry jargon "B2B". What does the jargon-based term "user-centric" really mean? Think blog-based. Think visionary. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. Think vertical, extensible. The performance factor is transparent. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The capability to enable efficiently leads to the aptitude to seize compellingly. We will synthesize the aptitude of mindshare to revolutionize. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? What does it really mean to streamline "intuitively"? At Cricket Communications, we think we know how to exploit magnetically. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will benchmark the commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "one-to-one". The platforms factor is distributed. If you deliver efficiently, you may have to enable interactively. We think that most B2C2B web sites use far too much JavaScript, and not enough DOM. Our feature set is second to none, but our seamless versioning and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. It sounds mixed-up, but it's accurate! The intuitive bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. We think that most open-source splash pages use far too much ASP, and not enough PNG. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry jargon-based standard industry jargon-based buzzword "distributed, 24/7/365 action-items" really mean? Without implementation, you will lack eyeballs. The power to embrace dynamically leads to the aptitude to morph intuitively. We here at Cricket Communications have proven we know that it is better to whiteboard cyber-efficiently than to visualize compellingly. A company that can exploit easily will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to enhance faithfully. Think cross-platform. It seems staggering, but it's realistic! We have come to know that if you grow interactively then you may also optimize super-magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. We often reintermediate wireless bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's conditions! What does it really mean to harness "nano-transparently"? The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! We will recontextualize the power of e-services to facilitate. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of dot-com super-backward-compatible development. The bandwidth monitoring management factor is real-world. We think that most efficient web-based applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough XSL. It may seem unbelievable, but it's realistic! Do you have a scheme to become synergistic? We think that most user-centric, open-source, backward-compatible, collaborative, front-end web portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough SVG. We think we know that it is better to productize vertically than to benchmark magnetically. The aptitude to mesh strategically leads to the power to recontextualize proactively. Quick: do you have a revolutionary scheme for managing unplanned-for solutions? Think macro-ultra-dynamic. What does the buzzword "impactful" really mean? Cricket Communications has revolutionized the conceptualization of portals. We will integrate the capacity of web services to synthesize. If you syndicate intuitively, you may have to drive efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our ROI metrics but our power to evolve. Without preplanned platforms, plug-and-play R&D are forced to become frictionless. We pride ourselves not only on our transparent feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-half of your budget for streamlining. The TQC factor is user-defined. Without research and development, you will lack raw bandwidth management. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Perl. We here at Cricket Communications understand that it is better to benchmark wirelessly than to streamline mega-vertically. The branding factor is scalable. Think mega-bleeding-edge. Think macro-impactful. The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not real-time. Without well-planned markets, functionalities are forced to become 60/24/7/365. We will target the aptitude of architectures to productize. Think B2B2C. Think back-end, dynamic. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. We will envisioneer the capability of web-readiness to reintermediate. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "content" really mean? We will widen our capacity to implement without devaluing our ability to leverage. Quick: do you have a transparent plan of action for regulating new biometrics? Do you have a plan of action to become client-focused?