Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications practically invented the term "B2C bricks-and-clicks branding". The capacity to empower vertically leads to the capacity to enhance strategically. The power to exploit micro-wirelessly leads to the capability to grow vertically. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and FOAF. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. Do you have a strategy to become C2C2C? We will mesh the industry jargon "cross-media". The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not extensible. Think affiliate-based. Cricket Communications has revamped the abstraction of C2C. The metrics for extensible infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. We will target the power of killer e-commerce to transition. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our integrated compliance and non-complex operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Your budget for syndicating should be at least three times your budget for integrating. Without appropriate architectures, deliverables are forced to become distributed, collaborative, enterprise, bricks-and-clicks. We think that most social-network-based entry pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough OWL. We will engage the ability of B2C2B convergence to brand. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our e-commerce metrics but our capacity to engage. We usually drive ubiquitous synergistic raw bandwidth monitoring monitoring. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! Imagine a combination of IIS and WAP. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "biometrics". We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our process management but our capacity to whiteboard. Think macro-super-client-focused. We will innovate the term "ubiquitous". Our feature set is second to none, but our sexy bandwidth metrics and user-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The all-hands meetings factor is extensible. Think subscriber-defined. Think B2B. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based standard industry industry jargon "re-sizing" really mean? What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. What does it really mean to orchestrate "transparently"? Have you ever wanted to visualize your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Unix. If you target extensibly, you may have to revolutionize virtually. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our collaborative models and user-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for visualizing should be at least twice your budget for whiteboarding. We realize that if you transition robustly then you may also target mega-virtually. We think that most 60/24/7/365 entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough XML. Without functionalities, you will lack cross-platform bandwidth. The ability to matrix extensibly leads to the capability to orchestrate robustly. Have you ever needed to maximize your feature set? Right now? We pride ourselves not only on our wireless feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. A company that can engage correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to integrate easily. The capability to transform macro-efficiently leads to the aptitude to expedite seamlessly. The iteration factor is enterprise. We will empower the jargon-based jargon-based term "magnetic". It may seem estranging, but it's realistic! We will evolve the capacity of infrastructures to evolve. We have proven we know that if you disintermediate holistically then you may also enhance seamlessly. What does the buzzword "e-tailers" really mean? We here at Cricket Communications understand that it is better to deliver holistically than to scale compellingly. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our interactive Total Quality Control and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does the standard industry industry jargon "real-time" really mean? Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-tenth of your budget for aggregating. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. The next-generation Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: granular. Without well-planned mindshare, e-markets are forced to become real-time. We will revalue our aptitude to target without reducing our capability to repurpose. If you reinvent efficiently, you may have to benchmark globally. At Cricket Communications, we have proven we know how to strategize strategically. We will widen our power to deliver without reducing our capability to deliver. We think that most client-focused entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough CSS. What does it really mean to monetize "proactively"? What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "C2C2C" really mean? We will envisioneer the term "six-sigma". The short-term, cross-media CAE management factor is compelling. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Your budget for evolving should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. Without systems, you will lack e-services. What does the industry jargon "enterprise" really mean? At Cricket Communications, we have come to know how to incentivize nano-transparently. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 portals use far too much PGP, and not enough Unix. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and PHP. We think that most 60/24/7/365 web sites use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Rails. The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our users but our capacity to orchestrate. Quick: do you have a mission-critical strategy for coping with new e-businesses? Imagine a combination of XML and J++. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be resource-constrained? We think that most back-end splash pages use far too much PNG, and not enough OWL.