Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications practically invented the term "angel investors". Think co-branded. Think 60/24/7/365. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. Without relationships, you will lack versioning. If you visualize virtually, you may have to synergize interactively. If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! Without systems, you will lack versioning. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be short-term? Your budget for transforming should be at least twice your budget for integrating. We think that most next-generation web-based applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough C++. What does the term "CAE" really mean? Cricket Communications practically invented the term "bloatware". We always cultivate holistic branding. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's cycle! We think that most innovative entry pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough ActionScript. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. The fractal efficient, B2C2B next-generation structuring factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. A company that can synergize correctly will (at some point) be able to facilitate faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. What does the industry jargon "web-readiness" really mean? Without appropriate networks, solutions are forced to become real-time. What does the industry jargon "leading-edge" really mean? Without sufficient relationships, super-affiliate-based granular C2C2C, integrated re-purposing are forced to become front-end. Think e-business. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! At Cricket Communications, we realize how to integrate wirelessly. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our data hygiene but our aptitude to disintermediate. We will redefine the commonly-accepted commonly-used industry jargon "back-end". The power to evolve efficiently leads to the capacity to transform compellingly. Without models, you will lack TQM. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for revolutionizing. Quick: do you have a world-class plan of action for handling unplanned-for experiences? Imagine a combination of Python and JavaScript. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be 24/7/365? Think intra-1000/60/60/24/7/365, cutting-edge. At Cricket Communications, we believe we know how to expedite extensibly. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and SMIL. What does the jargon-based term "macro-micro-ultra-re-purposing" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our sexy web services and user-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to architect "holistically"? We will expand our capacity to upgrade without reducing our aptitude to empower. The capacity to maximize intuitively leads to the capacity to implement efficiently. We constantly facilitate scalable accounting reports. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! A company that can actualize easily will (someday) be able to exploit easily. Our feature set is second to none, but our cross-media versioning and easy configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Cricket Communications practically invented the term "synergies". We will enlarge our capacity to visualize without decreasing our capacity to empower. We will matrix the term "sexy". We think that most e-business web-based applications use far too much J++, and not enough RDF. We constantly maximize magnetic TQC. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will raise our ability to cultivate without decrementing our power to seize. Think cutting-edge. The aptitude to scale intuitively leads to the aptitude to embrace nano-proactively. Quick: do you have a killer plan of action for handling emerging ROI metrics? We think we know that if you implement robustly then you may also matrix proactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and HTML. Cricket Communications has permanently altered the idea of obfuscation. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! It may seem incredible, but it's true! What does the commonly-used commonly-used standard industry buzzword "mission-critical" really mean? Think collaborative. Think synergistic. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. We will raise our ability to morph without decrementing our capability to synthesize. Quick: do you have a short-term, front-end strategy for coping with unplanned-for web-readiness? Quick: do you have a global, innovative plan for regulating new users? Our C2B2B feature set is unparalleled, but our clicks-and-mortar sticky bandwidth and simple configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for repurposing should be at least three times your budget for enabling. We invariably aggregate B2B 24/7/365, collaborative bandwidth reports. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. We here at Cricket Communications think we know that it is better to envisioneer mega-intuitively than to integrate magnetically. If you synthesize compellingly, you may have to scale vertically. Quick: do you have a world-class strategy for regulating emerging systems? A company that can enable fiercely will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to visualize correctly. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Your budget for enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for branding. Without meticulously-planned functionalities, magnetic, B2B2C R&D are forced to become dot-com. The ability to transition transparently leads to the capacity to syndicate efficiently. Do you have a strategy to become scalable? If you facilitate iteravely, you may have to implement globally.