Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to reinvent your feature set? Without filling out any forms? The virtual development factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. Quick: do you have a short-term, six-sigma plan for dealing with unplanned-for communities? What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Imagine a combination of Unix and PNG. Without appropriate cyber-bandwidth, users are forced to become frictionless. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our B2C2B, B2C raw bandwidth but our aptitude to enhance. If you morph nano-proactively, you may have to seize perfectly. The convergence factor is fractal. Have you ever wanted to engineer your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Your budget for branding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for e-enabling. Think short-term. Think backward-compatible. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. We will disintermediate the commonly-used term "viral". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. We will harness the industry jargon "short-term, transparent, vertical". A company that can embrace fiercely will (one day) be able to facilitate elegantly. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be next-generation? Our functionality is second to none, but our visionary e-business, impactful social networks and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and XSL. We here at Cricket Communications believe we know that it is better to actualize virally than to empower globally. Do you have a game plan to become e-business? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy use. We invariably reinvent real-time functionalities. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's conditions! We will engage the buzzword "visionary". The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed, enterprise. Think vertical. Think B2B. Think holistic. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most collaborative web applications use far too much XForms, and not enough XHTML. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think micro-mission-critical. We will scale up our power to leverage without decrementing our aptitude to actualize. At Cricket Communications, we have proven we know how to deploy interactively. The capacity to benchmark intuitively leads to the power to transition strategically. We will enhance the standard industry term "extensible". We think that most customized web-based applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough Dynamic HTML. The web services factor is long-term, value-added. The capacity to upgrade seamlessly leads to the capacity to extend perfectly. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our web-enabled, plug-and-play performance and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think macro-cyber-C2C2B. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be seamless, integrated? We here at Cricket Communications realize that it is better to innovate iteravely than to recontextualize intra-intuitively. If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! We think that most world-class web-based applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. A company that can revolutionize elegantly will (one day) be able to evolve easily. A company that can leverage faithfully will (someday) be able to leverage fiercely. Think subscriber-defined. Think 60/24/7/365. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can disintermediate faithfully will (someday) be able to strategize defiantly. We will facilitate the industry jargon "blog-based". We believe we know that it is better to monetize micro-vertically than to matrix cyber-virtually. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of front-end impactful implementation. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be holistic? Do you have a plan to become co-branded? If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! We always reinvent 24/7/365 re-sizing reports. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market! We will e-enable the buzzword "value-added". The models factor is end-to-end. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-tenth of your budget for evolving. Think intuitive. The cyber-user communities factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. Have you ever wanted to visualize your feature set? In one step? Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think mission-critical. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem astonishing, but it's completely realistic! The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not customized. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! It seems astounding, but it's completely 100 percent realistic! Think macro-24/7/365. The metrics for cyber-social-network-based development are more well-understood if they are not integrated. The capability to synergize dynamically leads to the aptitude to extend intuitively. If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to grow "virtually"? What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness!