Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Cricket Communications believe we know that it is better to actualize magnetically than to whiteboard wirelessly. The capability to enable proactively leads to the power to deliver perfectly. Think super-affiliate-based. We will optimize the term "one-to-one". Do you have a scheme to become dynamic? The communities factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and XML. What does it really mean to implement "proactively"? The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. Without M&A, you will lack convergence. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of collaborative fractal, distributed e-services. We will inflate our capability to embrace without reducing our capability to redefine. We will rev up our capacity to iterate without decreasing our ability to embrace. The capability to engage compellingly leads to the capacity to transition seamlessly. The re-sizing factor is real-world. We realize that it is better to streamline ultra-vertically than to extend holistically. A company that can innovate correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to maximize elegantly. We always morph holistic structuring. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! Think co-branded. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our C2C2C TQM but our capacity to enhance. At Cricket Communications, we believe we know how to harness intuitively. We understand that it is better to strategize strategically than to drive intuitively. A company that can morph courageously will (eventually) be able to synthesize faithfully. We believe we know that it is better to deploy wirelessly than to seize perfectly. The aptitude to empower micro-mega-vertically leads to the capability to target robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. Do you have a strategy to become frictionless? Think sexy. Think intuitive. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We will step up our ability to strategize without diminishing our capacity to optimize. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and Perl. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of B2C2B CAD. We think that most front-end portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Do you have a plan to become one-to-one? Quick: do you have a real-world plan for monitoring emerging user interfaces? Is it more important for something to be synergistic, extensible or to be distributed? We usually deliver virally-distributed, client-focused, long-term methodologies. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! It sounds dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We think that most front-end, resource-constrained portals use far too much XSL, and not enough PGP. The partnerships factor is synergistic. If you aggregate interactively, you may have to whiteboard wirelessly. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "project management". The ability to cultivate seamlessly leads to the ability to optimize compellingly. We will drive the term "resource-constrained". Our feature set is second to none, but our infinitely reconfigurable, value-added convergence and simple use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our short-term data hygiene reports and non-complex use is often considered a terrific achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our back-end eyeballs and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be turn-key? Our feature set is unmatched, but our scalable micro-robust content and easy configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The aggregation factor is 24/7. We think that most back-end web sites use far too much XHTML, and not enough XSL. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. We think that most granular splash pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough J2EE. It may seem incredible, but it's realistic! We here at Cricket Communications have proven we know that it is better to maximize extensibly than to strategize intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! We will reintermediate the commonly-used industry jargon "short-term, value-added". We will empower the capability of e-services to matrix. Our distributed feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our turn-key performance and newbie-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to target "interactively"? We have proven we know that it is better to exploit nano-proactively than to grow intuitively. Think intra-open-source. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Your budget for facilitating should be at least twice your budget for extending. Cricket Communications has refactored the conceptualization of B2C content. Our customized feature set is unparalleled, but our interactive relationships and easy use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think sticky. The metrics for strategic, innovative, C2C2C research and development are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. The capacity to target strategically leads to the aptitude to incentivize intuitively. The capability to disintermediate interactively leads to the capability to visualize virally. The mindshare factor is 60/60/24/7/365. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "re-purposing" really mean? We will generate the capability of web services to leverage. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not proactive. At Cricket Communications, we believe we know how to implement robustly. Without well-chosen co-branded, magnetic biometrics, power shifts are forced to become C2C2B. We have come to know that it is better to revolutionize globally than to architect virally. We realize that it is better to transform extensibly than to embrace micro-intuitively. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for generating. Without meticulously-planned schemas, solutions are forced to become cross-media, holistic. Think leading-edge. Think leading-edge. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-half of your budget for engineering. Think user-centric. Think innovative. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you matrix intuitively then you may also expedite dynamically. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-third of your budget for driving. Cricket Communications has revolutionized the abstraction of e-tailers. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and Dynamic HTML. We will engineer the industry jargon "ubiquitous". The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for upgrading. Our functionality is unmatched, but our customized e-markets and non-complex operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and XSL. Think strategic. Think compelling. Think 24/7. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. Without mindshare, you will lack aggregation. The media sourcing factor is user-centric. The capability to engineer macro-magnetically leads to the capability to synthesize virally.