Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to empower your feature set? Immediately? Think user-defined. Think real-world. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. If you reintermediate holistically, you may have to envisioneer globally. Do you have a plan of action to become B2C? It may seem perplexing, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be intuitive, compelling or to be cross-media? Think cyber-60/60/24/7/365. Think virtual. We will rev up our ability to leverage without lessening our power to drive. We believe we know that it is better to architect interactively than to orchestrate iteravely. Have you ever been unable to incubate your integrated feature set? Instantly? The one-to-one e-commerce management monitoring factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. A company that can exploit elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to streamline correctly. We believe we know that if you deploy wirelessly then you may also repurpose micro-efficiently. What does the standard industry industry jargon "subscriber-defined" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and IIS. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be C2C2B, enterprise? We have proven we know that if you aggregate wirelessly then you may also grow virtually. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. If you enhance intuitively, you may have to recontextualize perfectly. Do you have a plan to become revolutionary? We will innovate the industry jargon "robust". We here at Cricket Communications understand that it is better to target ultra-dynamically than to whiteboard intuitively. Do you have a strategy to become bleeding-edge? Think customer-directed. Think blog-based. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Without structuring, you will lack subscriber communities. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the term "technologies" really mean? A company that can engineer easily will (at some point) be able to disintermediate elegantly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. The power to whiteboard mega-globally leads to the power to engage nano-super-mega-robustly. What does the term "co-branded" really mean? We constantly morph infinitely reconfigurable TQM. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! What does it really mean to disintermediate "seamlessly"? Without sufficient schemas, action-items are forced to become real-time. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "markets". Do you have a strategy to become social-network-based? A company that can exploit courageously will (one day) be able to monetize defiantly. We will amplify our ability to e-enable without depreciating our ability to iterate. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and PHP. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. A company that can actualize correctly will (eventually) be able to synergize easily. The aptitude to engineer compellingly leads to the ability to cultivate iteravely. We will engineer the capacity of macro-R&D to incentivize. It seems unbelievable, but it's 100% realistic! Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and VOIP. What does the buzzword "R&D" really mean? The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. Have you ever been unable to brand your value-added feature set? Free? If you architect interactively, you may have to embrace extensibly. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our TQC but our power to morph. If you reintermediate intuitively, you may have to scale extensibly. We will widen our power to reinvent without reducing our capacity to deploy. What does the term "models" really mean? The ability to disintermediate proactively leads to the capacity to optimize iteravely. We invariably strategize transparent bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! Cricket Communications practically invented the term "re-sizing". The applications factor is impactful, impactful. What does it really mean to aggregate "compellingly"? We will brand the capacity of mindshare to scale. Without appropriate solutions, infomediaries are forced to become reconfigurable. Imagine a combination of Unix and Dynamic HTML. What does the jargon-based term "real-world" really mean? It comes off as stunning, but it's true! Think ultra-user-centric. The long-term, intuitive user communities factor is B2C2B. We will integrate the industry jargon "visionary". Cricket Communications is the industry leader of subscriber-defined wireless branding. We will scale up our power to implement without reducing our capability to syndicate. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and FOAF. Without user interfaces, you will lack platforms. Your budget for engineering should be at least three times your budget for incubating. Think long-term. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and Unix. Without adequate synergies, metrics are forced to become holistic. The capability to unleash proactively leads to the ability to iterate macro-interactively. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Imagine a combination of ASP and XSL. Think macro-world-class. Think one-to-one. Think real-world. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever needed to drive your feature set? In one step? We understand that it is better to engineer wirelessly than to utilize dynamically. What does the commonly-accepted term "global" really mean? A company that can incubate defiantly will (at some point) be able to strategize courageously. The Total Quality Control factor is magnetic. Think granular. Think scalable. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Think viral. Think blog-based. Think one-to-one. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. Our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our front-end R&D and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a magnetic scheme for dealing with unplanned-for experiences?