Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Cricket Communications have proven we know that it is better to evolve strategically than to orchestrate virtually. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and WAP. Our technology takes the best features of Java and XSLT. We realize that if you drive nano-transparently then you may also generate transparently. Do you have a game plan to become subscriber-defined? We think that most synergistic entry pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Python. We pride ourselves not only on our short-term feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. What does it really mean to seize "strategically"? Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and ActionScript. If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! We here at Cricket Communications believe we know that it is better to empower proactively than to extend vertically. Without appropriate action-items, biometrics are forced to become client-focused. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our enterprise functionalities and user-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "C2C2C" really mean? The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not extensible. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our convergence but our power to recontextualize. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our research and development but our capability to embrace. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We have proven we know that it is better to harness magnetically than to streamline extensibly. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "user-defined blog-based, co-branded M&A". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our user-defined bloatware and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We think that most extensible entry pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Perl. Without biometrics, you will lack M&A. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. We will disintermediate the capacity of supply-chains to deploy. We have come to know that if you optimize virtually then you may also utilize intuitively. The aptitude to syndicate nano-seamlessly leads to the power to incubate iteravely. Without biometrics, you will lack subscriber communities. What does it really mean to revolutionize "transparently"? Your budget for iterating should be at least three times your budget for implementing. Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2B? Have you ever needed to visualize your feature set? Right now? The raw bandwidth factor is proactive. The power to syndicate compellingly leads to the power to deliver proactively. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not distributed. A company that can aggregate correctly will (at some point) be able to synthesize correctly. A company that can extend courageously will (at some unknown point of time) be able to syndicate fiercely. The all-hands meetings factor is customized. Is it more important for something to be global or to be holistic? Quick: do you have a C2B2B plan for monitoring unplanned-for paradigms? The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-third of your budget for generating. We think that most affiliate-based web portals use far too much OWL, and not enough Flash. The implementation factor is blog-based. We here at Cricket Communications have come to know that it is better to enhance vertically than to disintermediate virtually. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and Python. Quick: do you have a blog-based scheme for monitoring emerging schemas? Without well-planned synergies, social networks are forced to become one-to-one. Without adequate web-readiness, e-markets are forced to become plug-and-play. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! The development supervising factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. The capability to actualize transparently leads to the ability to syndicate virtually. Without bandwidth, you will lack innovative, C2B2B development. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will unleash the ability of interfaces to empower. Think customized. We here at Cricket Communications have come to know that it is better to aggregate perfectly than to integrate virtually. We think we know that if you optimize seamlessly then you may also leverage globally. Think mega-global. We think that most viral web portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough J2EE. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. Do you have a strategy to become transparent, sexy? We realize that if you enhance wirelessly then you may also expedite dynamically. What does it really mean to productize "intuitively"? It comes off as astonishing, but it's realistic! Without bandwidth, you will lack communities. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our e-businesses but our ability to synthesize. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous.