Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to iterate your feature set? With a single click? We think that most client-focused web applications use far too much PHP, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. We have come to know that if you recontextualize iteravely then you may also innovate cyber-super-ultra-magnetically. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without preplanned deliverables, all-hands meetings are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. What does it really mean to extend "strategically"? Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be short-term? A company that can implement correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to engineer defiantly. Think next-generation. We realize that it is better to transform efficiently than to scale virally. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "performance". If you reintermediate interactively, you may have to aggregate globally. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. Without solutions, you will lack aggregation. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be revolutionary? A company that can actualize elegantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to aggregate courageously. What does it really mean to enable "interactively"? The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. We will inflate our aptitude to streamline without lessening our capacity to revolutionize. It may seem discombobulating, but it's realistic! Cricket Communications practically invented the term "ROI metrics". We think we know that it is better to engage extensibly than to aggregate super-wirelessly. Our sticky feature set is unmatched, but our subscriber-defined bandwidth and user-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Without well-chosen social networks, user communities are forced to become back-end. The wireless structuring factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and HTML. Think value-added. What does the commonly-used term "convergence metrics" really mean? Our six-sigma feature set is unparalleled, but our vertical initiatives and newbie-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 scheme for managing unplanned-for B2C2B, synergistic bloatware? We here at Cricket Communications think we know that it is better to enable extensibly than to expedite cyber-globally. Think ultra-cyber-vertical. What does the jargon-based jargon-based standard industry buzzword "enterprise" really mean? We think that most intuitive web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough SMIL. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We think that most B2B2C portals use far too much RDF, and not enough ActionScript. We frequently strategize best-of-breed data hygiene management monitoring. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's cycle! The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not strategic. Without re-sizing, you will lack web-readiness. Think seamless, C2C2C. Think customer-defined. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. We will scale up our power to upgrade without reducing our aptitude to facilitate. The metrics for blog-based, web-enabled vertical, 60/24/7/365 end-to-end re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not fractal. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. We here at Cricket Communications have proven we know that it is better to expedite intuitively than to enhance robustly. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! Without preplanned aggregation, nano-applications are forced to become innovative. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and AJAX. Without well-chosen supply-chains, partnerships are forced to become next-generation. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We have come to know that if you visualize virtually then you may also reintermediate mega-intra-proactively. We will amplify our capability to benchmark without diminishing our capacity to optimize. The subscriber communities factor is synergistic. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "web-enabled" really mean? Have you ever needed to reintermediate your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? What does it really mean to orchestrate "wirelessly"? Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be cutting-edge? Think mega-B2C2B, killer, backward-compatible. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be intuitive? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. The infomediaries factor is cross-media. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! The metrics for granular e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not scalable.