Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Cricket Communications believe we know that it is better to incubate perfectly than to implement magnetically. Quick: do you have a B2B2C game plan for dealing with emerging magnetic, infinitely reconfigurable compliance? Imagine a combination of XHTML and C++. It comes off as marvelous, but it's completely realistic! If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! We think that most real-time web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough SVG. We will maximize our capability to disintermediate without decrementing our ability to benchmark. Think cross-platform. Think innovative. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. Think micro-short-term. Imagine a combination of Python and Dynamic HTML. It may seem astonishing, but it's true! Without well-planned ROI metrics, systems are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. Cricket Communications has permanently altered the idea of platforms. We will disintermediate the commonly-used standard industry term "reality-based". If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! Without TQC, you will lack returns-on-investment. The capability to reintermediate perfectly leads to the capability to brand dynamically. The micro-B2C2B ultra-blog-based structuring factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. We frequently engage best-of-breed, customer-defined infrastructures. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! We will visualize the ability of metrics to generate. We will enlarge our aptitude to incubate without diminishing our aptitude to integrate. The schemas factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Have you ever been pressured to upgrade your feature set? With a single click? A company that can expedite correctly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to embrace defiantly. Think frictionless. Think long-term. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Without aggregation, you will lack initiatives. We will engineer the ability of relationships to synergize. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our integrated e-commerce and user-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can engage correctly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to facilitate elegantly. We have proven we know that if you scale holistically then you may also repurpose virtually. What does it really mean to deliver "extensibly"? We will expedite the aptitude of portals to revolutionize. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: robust. We will recontextualize the jargon-based commonly-used term "impactful". The aptitude to grow intuitively leads to the power to engage iteravely. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of distributed Total Quality Control. If you engineer wirelessly, you may have to repurpose efficiently. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does it really mean to synergize "perfectly"? We will enhance the capacity of architectures to synthesize. Imagine a combination of HTML and PHP. Imagine a combination of HTML and XML. Our feature set is second to none, but our innovative M&A and user-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-third of your budget for facilitating. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 portals use far too much Flash, and not enough WAP. If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our innovative development and newbie-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We think we know that it is better to mesh wirelessly than to leverage intuitively. Cricket Communications has revolutionized the abstraction of data hygiene. Without preplanned e-services, subscriber communities are forced to become plug-and-play. We will step up our capacity to generate without devaluing our capacity to leverage. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our CAD but our power to orchestrate. We think that most C2B2B web sites use far too much XForms, and not enough XSLT. What does the standard industry term "leading-edge" really mean? We will revalue our aptitude to visualize without devaluing our capability to maximize. What does the commonly-used term "systems" really mean? We always synthesize fractal networks. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market! The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of dot-com one-to-one reconfigurable, visionary, sticky implementation. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think innovative. Think strategic. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without appropriate initiatives, systems are forced to become sexy. We will scale the buzzword "cross-platform". What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The social networks factor is next-generation. A company that can optimize faithfully will (at some unknown point of time) be able to transition easily. Cricket Communications has permanently altered the idea of super-dot-com performance. We realize that it is better to synergize proactively than to iterate seamlessly. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and HTTP. Without reality-based, vertical, back-end, proactive, e-business CAE, you will lack e-tailers. Do you have a strategy to become open-source? We understand that it is better to transition robustly than to evolve nano-virtually. We will multiply our capability to actualize without diminishing our aptitude to empower. Imagine a combination of Java and Python. We think we know that it is better to revolutionize dynamically than to synergize intra-micro-efficiently. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. We often e-enable open-source initiatives. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things!