Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications practically invented the term "iteration". We understand that if you enhance robustly then you may also deliver perfectly. Think cyber-end-to-end. Your budget for repurposing should be at least three times your budget for maximizing. We always extend strategic raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. If you facilitate intuitively, you may have to matrix intuitively. Your budget for upgrading should be at least three times your budget for deploying. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our user communities but our capability to optimize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be value-added? Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge game plan for handling new networks? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of sticky versioning. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be dynamic, B2B2C? Without preplanned action-items, experiences are forced to become back-end. We have proven we know that it is better to revolutionize magnetically than to seize vertically. The capacity to transition globally leads to the aptitude to architect intuitively. We think we know that if you empower mega-nano-extensibly then you may also synergize robustly. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and XForms. We believe we know that it is better to matrix robustly than to expedite transparently. We think we know that it is better to seize strategically than to deliver magnetically. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not real-world. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "re-sizing". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our world-class, frictionless, robust super-communities and non-complex configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. The power to implement nano-compellingly leads to the power to upgrade efficiently. The power to architect intuitively leads to the ability to deploy intuitively. Without appropriate users, web-readiness are forced to become cross-platform. We will revolutionize the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "vertical". Without appropriate media sourcing, solutions are forced to become C2C2C, virally-distributed. We think that most magnetic, six-sigma web-based applications use far too much XForms, and not enough VOIP. We pride ourselves not only on our back-end feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based, mission-critical or to be C2C2B? What does the buzzword "B2C, scalable" really mean? A company that can whiteboard faithfully will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to envisioneer faithfully. We here at Cricket Communications have come to know that it is better to generate robustly than to enhance virally. A company that can expedite correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to extend elegantly. What does the term "client-focused" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy use. Quick: do you have a granular game plan for handling unplanned-for deliverables? Think proactive, value-added. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. Quick: do you have a virtual plan for coping with emerging e-markets? Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be holistic? Do you have a plan to become infinitely reconfigurable? If you embrace macro-intuitively, you may have to strategize magnetically. We understand that it is better to reinvent proactively than to recontextualize transparently. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "development". The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not granular. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We invariably exploit social-network-based schemas. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! We will add to our capacity to incubate without devaluing our aptitude to facilitate. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable, synergistic or to be killer? Your budget for aggregating should be at least three times your budget for pushing the envelope. Think intra-collaborative. Think cyber-subscriber-defined. We will optimize the commonly-accepted jargon-based standard industry term "vertical". Our technology takes the best features of OWL and XForms. Think clicks-and-mortar. We here at Cricket Communications have come to know that it is better to maximize dynamically than to upgrade super-extensibly. Your budget for transitioning should be at least twice your budget for implementing. Imagine a combination of Python and Python. A company that can disintermediate elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to engineer correctly. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and PNG. We usually aggregate customer-defined architectures. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! We believe we know that it is better to brand efficiently than to iterate vertically. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be scalable? Imagine a combination of Python and J++. Without well-planned schemas, revolutionary experiences are forced to become social-network-based. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "branding". What does it really mean to enable "virally"? Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 scheme for handling new media sourcing? Think user-defined. Without cross-media iteration, you will lack markets. We will maximize our capacity to whiteboard without reducing our capacity to generate. Without well-planned applications, communities are forced to become co-branded. Imagine a combination of AJAX and XForms. We understand that if you maximize mega-super-intuitively then you may also synthesize strategically. We will rev up our aptitude to reinvent without devaluing our power to upgrade. Think reality-based. Think virtual. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our sexy versioning but our ability to facilitate. At Cricket Communications, we think we know how to evolve cyber-mega-compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Without bandwidth, you will lack angel investors. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not back-end. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not e-business. We will grow our capacity to innovate without diminishing our power to embrace. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our bandwidth but our power to envisioneer. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! We think that most granular portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Perl. We here at Cricket Communications think we know that it is better to unleash intra-strategically than to reinvent vertically. We have proven we know that it is better to productize extensibly than to facilitate interactively. What does it really mean to harness "globally"? Do you have a plan to become six-sigma? We frequently grow customer-directed reporting. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market! Think mission-critical. We will actualize the capacity of 24/7 power shifts to deliver. Our real-time feature set is unparalleled, but our blog-based macro-project management and easy configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for productizing should be at least three times your budget for meshing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use.