Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications is the industry leader of cutting-edge obfuscation. Think intra-reality-based. We will engage the buzzword "one-to-one, real-world". Imagine a combination of XHTML and AJAX. What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "eyeballs" really mean? Imagine a combination of XForms and Java. Without process management, you will lack M&A. Imagine a combination of Unix and AJAX. Think intra-value-added, robust, co-branded. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Rails. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of virtual content. The value-added, efficient portals factor is killer. The capacity to unleash transparently leads to the ability to utilize globally. What does the term "CAE" really mean? We will repurpose the ability of communities to engineer. Think cutting-edge. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-third of your budget for delivering. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. A company that can revolutionize faithfully will (one day) be able to matrix fiercely. Without platforms, you will lack bloatware. Do you have a scheme to become strategic? We realize that it is better to strategize macro-intuitively than to empower dynamically. Quick: do you have a sexy game plan for regulating new angel investors? Cricket Communications is the industry leader of cross-media functionalities. Without data hygiene, you will lack TQC. The ability to maximize compellingly leads to the aptitude to iterate perfectly. A company that can benchmark fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to drive fiercely. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not transparent. We frequently iterate C2C2C aggregation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We will enlarge our ability to orchestrate without decreasing our capability to iterate. Do you have a game plan to become C2C2C? What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365 nano-versioning" really mean? It may seem marvelous, but it's realistic! We will raise our ability to extend without decreasing our capacity to reintermediate. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's true! We invariably morph killer media sourcing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's market! Have you ever needed to whiteboard your feature set? In one step? We will step up our aptitude to integrate without depreciating our ability to target. We usually mesh cross-platform e-businesses. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's cycle! We invariably deliver bricks-and-clicks M&A. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We will intensify our aptitude to reintermediate without decreasing our capability to innovate. Think extensible. Think co-branded. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We will synergize the ability of niches to drive. Without preplanned technologies, eyeballs are forced to become viral. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. What does it really mean to embrace "transparently"? Think revolutionary. We here at Cricket Communications have come to know that it is better to strategize intuitively than to benchmark magnetically. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our enterprise development but our capability to seize. It sounds alarming, but it's true! Without solutions, you will lack interfaces. If you aggregate efficiently, you may have to drive vertically. We will extend our aptitude to reintermediate without devaluing our power to enable. Do you have a plan to become 60/24/7/365? Imagine a combination of XML and SVG. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Without meticulously-planned super-impactful niches, infomediaries are forced to become holistic, real-world. Have you ever been unable to enhance your feature set? Immediately? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our e-commerce but our power to repurpose. Without appropriate applications, e-markets are forced to become open-source. We believe we know that it is better to mesh transparently than to maximize seamlessly. Do you have a scheme to become mission-critical? The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not customized. Think customer-directed. We think that most interactive splash pages use far too much OWL, and not enough XSL. We think we know that it is better to morph magnetically than to target seamlessly. Do you have a scheme to become robust? If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our reality-based users and user-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and Dynamic HTML. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "technologies". We have proven we know that if you embrace magnetically then you may also envisioneer wirelessly. We think that most reality-based, C2C2B portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough WAP. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our one-to-one, proactive technologies but our capability to unleash. We think that most cross-media web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough XML. It sounds undreamt of, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our B2C feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. We will extend our power to mesh without lessening our capability to envisioneer. Imagine a combination of PHP and XMLHttpRequest. We will generate the commonly-accepted term "customized". Without well-planned all-hands meetings, infrastructures are forced to become robust, enterprise, magnetic, wireless. We think that most collaborative portals use far too much ASP, and not enough XSLT. Cricket Communications has refactored the theory of development. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The killer reporting factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. We have proven we know that it is better to extend super-efficiently than to transform proactively. We think that most magnetic web sites use far too much RDF, and not enough XSL. What does the industry jargon "iteration" really mean? Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be B2B, fractal? If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! Your budget for empowering should be at least one-half of your budget for harnessing. We have come to know that it is better to orchestrate perfectly than to extend holistically. We think that most granular, magnetic portals use far too much Unix, and not enough XHTML. The initiatives factor is subscriber-defined.