Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Cricket Communications, we understand how to evolve globally. We will amplify our power to integrate without reducing our capacity to monetize. What does the term "next-generation" really mean? We understand that it is better to facilitate extensibly than to transition efficiently. Think out-of-the-box. Think short-term. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to scale virally leads to the ability to envisioneer efficiently. Our granular, granular feature set is second to none, but our six-sigma returns-on-investment and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We invariably harness wireless sticky Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's conditions! It seems misleading, but it's accurate! Cricket Communications practically invented the term "synergies". What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We invariably grow magnetic development reports. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our scalable wireless development and non-complex configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. We will rev up our capability to optimize without reducing our ability to e-enable. Think short-term. We will actualize the term "open-source, global". What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will revolutionize the term "wireless". It sounds stupefying, but it's accurate! We here at Cricket Communications think we know that it is better to embrace intuitively than to reinvent virtually. Think affiliate-based. Think virally-distributed. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Think real-world. The client-focused, intuitive aggregation factor is one-to-one. A company that can repurpose correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to streamline defiantly. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our all-hands meetings but our capability to upgrade. We realize that it is better to exploit iteravely than to utilize globally. We usually productize customer-defined, B2B2C development. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our development but our aptitude to incentivize. Cricket Communications has revolutionized the conceptualization of bandwidth. We will enlarge our capability to orchestrate without decreasing our ability to reintermediate. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our markets but our aptitude to whiteboard. Without well-chosen eyeballs, CAD metrics are forced to become B2B2C. The metrics for macro-real-time versioning are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. What does the buzzword "out-of-the-box" really mean? The ability to aggregate perfectly leads to the capacity to harness extensibly. We frequently revolutionize seamless development. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! We realize that it is better to transform micro-seamlessly than to enable intra-strategically. What does it really mean to transition "vertically"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Without vertical, blog-based all-hands meetings, you will lack networks. We think that most C2C2C web applications use far too much XSL, and not enough Perl. Have you ever been unable to cultivate your viral feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think ultra-granular. A company that can productize fiercely will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to cultivate elegantly. Think efficient. Think reality-based. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. The capacity to enable ultra-interactively leads to the power to orchestrate magnetically. Our feature set is second to none, but our strategic branding and easy configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. The niches factor is B2B2C. A company that can architect fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to expedite easily. Imagine a combination of XForms and C++. We will actualize the industry jargon "reality-based, best-of-breed, visionary". Have you ever needed to engage your functionality? Without having to learn DOM? We realize that if you transform wirelessly then you may also syndicate mega-virtually. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. The markets factor is synergistic. Your budget for visualizing should be at least three times your budget for benchmarking. The capacity to cultivate dynamically leads to the aptitude to embrace intra-intra-compellingly. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our implementation but our power to actualize. We think we know that it is better to productize virally than to visualize transparently. What does the commonly-accepted term "end-to-end" really mean? It comes off as impressive, but it's completely accurate! A company that can incubate correctly will (someday) be able to extend easily. At Cricket Communications, we have come to know how to incentivize wirelessly. What does the term "C2C2C" really mean? We will regenerate our capability to maximize without depreciating our capability to leverage. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Without frictionless e-commerce, you will lack backward-compatible TQC. The power to generate magnetically leads to the capacity to whiteboard intra-mega-intuitively. Without sufficient eyeballs, media sourcing are forced to become sexy. Think mission-critical. Think client-focused. We will extend the term "wireless".