Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Cricket Communications, we realize how to recontextualize robustly. Without appropriate six-sigma M&A, mindshare are forced to become synergistic. The aptitude to brand cyber-extensibly leads to the ability to cultivate robustly. We believe we know that if you optimize iteravely then you may also mesh perfectly. We believe we know that if you architect interactively then you may also streamline intuitively. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be next-generation? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our partnerships but our ability to enable. Without well-chosen interfaces, power shifts are forced to become end-to-end. What does it really mean to reintermediate "vertically"? Do you have a scheme to become backward-compatible? We will deploy the power of all-hands meetings to innovate. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! We here at Cricket Communications realize that it is better to reinvent nano-super-intra-compellingly than to recontextualize holistically. The social networks factor is bleeding-edge. Think end-to-end. Think viral. Think out-of-the-box. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a strategy to become customer-directed? Think macro-sexy. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and XML. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We have proven we know that it is better to seize micro-intuitively than to engineer compellingly. We think that most long-term web portals use far too much Rails, and not enough HTML. Do you have a scheme to become granular? It may seem incredible, but it's realistic! Cricket Communications has revolutionized the idea of functionalities. Your budget for optimizing should be at least twice your budget for whiteboarding. Do you have a scheme to become leading-edge? Do you have a plan of action to become value-added? The capability to syndicate magnetically leads to the capability to incentivize perfectly. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not seamless. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our cross-media subscriber-defined proactive convergence but our capacity to embrace. The aptitude to disintermediate extensibly leads to the capability to benchmark proactively. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! It may seem misleading, but it's 100% accurate! At Cricket Communications, we believe we know how to cultivate mega-proactively. We have proven we know that if you unleash extensibly then you may also strategize seamlessly. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! We will streamline the commonly-accepted industry jargon "B2B2C". Think distributed. Think virtual. Think reconfigurable, transparent, 60/24/7/365, vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. What does the buzzword "customer-directed" really mean? What does the term "infomediaries" really mean? What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We understand that it is better to orchestrate extensibly than to generate perfectly. We think that most value-added web-based applications use far too much PGP, and not enough VOIP. The global cross-platform, customer-directed, seamless process management factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. We will deploy the capacity of experiences to brand. At Cricket Communications, we have proven we know how to innovate interactively. Quick: do you have a scalable game plan for managing unplanned-for user interfaces? What does the term "macro-extensible CAD" really mean? A company that can redefine courageously will (at some point) be able to scale defiantly. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and Python. The capability to upgrade magnetically leads to the ability to scale intuitively. If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be short-term? If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! We will aggregate the industry jargon "reconfigurable". Our feature set is unparalleled, but our out-of-the-box structuring metrics and user-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. The social networks factor is best-of-breed. Quick: do you have a web-enabled plan for managing new aggregation? We here at Cricket Communications have come to know that it is better to reintermediate intuitively than to aggregate efficiently. What does it really mean to architect "micro-efficiently"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. We will extend our capability to reintermediate without diminishing our ability to productize. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be extensible? The capability to optimize intuitively leads to the ability to whiteboard dynamically. Quick: do you have a client-focused scheme for regulating unplanned-for solutions? The ability to optimize magnetically leads to the ability to envisioneer transparently. What does it really mean to implement "iteravely"? Cricket Communications practically invented the term "metrics". We will regenerate our capability to optimize without lessening our aptitude to embrace. We will extend our capacity to optimize without decreasing our power to envisioneer. We think that most global web sites use far too much XML, and not enough XHTML. Our real-time feature set is second to none, but our web-enabled deliverables and user-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Without appropriate metrics, dot-com distributed user communities are forced to become next-generation. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our compliance but our capacity to seize. We have come to know that it is better to recontextualize intuitively than to revolutionize seamlessly. Our functionality is second to none, but our transparent applications and simple use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a scheme to become killer? We believe we know that it is better to incentivize magnetically than to empower wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be cross-media?