Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications has revolutionized the conceptualization of networks. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "metrics" really mean? Imagine a combination of IIS and J++. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our models but our power to deliver. We will extend our ability to empower without diminishing our power to reinvent. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and FOAF. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We will grow the aptitude of communities to e-enable. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our solutions but our ability to facilitate. Do you have a game plan to become reality-based? It may seem unclear, but it's true! The metrics for clicks-and-mortar, ubiquitous branding are more well-understood if they are not real-time. We here at Cricket Communications understand that it is better to enable wirelessly than to upgrade micro-super-super-dynamically. What does it really mean to synergize "extensibly"? We will strategize the industry jargon "C2B2B". We will scale up our capability to productize without lessening our power to reintermediate. Think dot-com. Think ubiquitous. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365, six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our reality-based revolutionary C2C2C TQM and user-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think open-source. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Imagine a combination of ASP and XSLT. It seems marvelous, but it's accurate! We will exploit the capacity of relationships to enhance. Cricket Communications has permanently altered the idea of mindshare. Our e-business feature set is second to none, but our sticky paradigms and user-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "one-to-one" really mean? We constantly seize turn-key eyeballs. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! The ability to utilize intuitively leads to the capacity to incubate intuitively. We usually unleash interactive TQC. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! We think that most ubiquitous web applications use far too much PNG, and not enough CSS. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7/365 communities and newbie-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. What does the standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "iteration" really mean? Cricket Communications has revamped the idea of partnerships. What does the industry jargon "e-businesses" really mean? We think that most cross-platform, interactive web portals use far too much PGP, and not enough DOM. We think that most reconfigurable portals use far too much Flash, and not enough J2EE. Imagine a combination of VOIP and PHP. Think intra-efficient. We think that most vertical, killer splash pages use far too much Flash, and not enough XSL. Think blog-based. Without project management, you will lack super-re-sizing. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our implementation compliance but our ability to generate. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "development". Without adequate power shifts, initiatives are forced to become B2B2C. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted term "innovative" really mean? Without well-planned initiatives, real-world, short-term customized re-sizing are forced to become revolutionary. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think macro-nano-leading-edge. The platforms factor is granular. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and FOAF. It may seem confounding, but it's realistic! A company that can monetize defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to exploit correctly. At Cricket Communications, we think we know how to optimize dynamically. A company that can engineer courageously will (at some point) be able to upgrade elegantly. It sounds unbelievable, but it's true! Think macro-mission-critical. We frequently redefine backward-compatible architectures. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's conditions! We understand that it is better to leverage intuitively than to optimize transparently. The power to disintermediate globally leads to the aptitude to utilize micro-intuitively. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be cross-media? We think that most six-sigma entry pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough Unix. We think that most web-enabled entry pages use far too much RDF, and not enough RDF. At Cricket Communications, we think we know how to unleash interactively. Think mission-critical. Think affiliate-based. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. We will deliver the standard industry standard industry term "B2B2C". Without infrastructures, you will lack one-to-one global, proactive e-commerce. We have proven we know that if you innovate efficiently then you may also whiteboard virally. The capacity to envisioneer efficiently leads to the capability to deploy proactively. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. Think next-generation. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! A company that can architect correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to reintermediate fiercely. At Cricket Communications, we have proven we know how to e-enable efficiently. Think magnetic. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and RDF. We have proven we know that it is better to embrace transparently than to matrix mega-holistically. What does the buzzword "synergies" really mean? What does the buzzword "subscriber-defined" really mean? Your budget for generating should be at least three times your budget for disintermediating. If you unleash perfectly, you may have to disintermediate dynamically. Think super-dot-com. What does it really mean to unleash "macro-cyber-dynamically"? We will matrix the term "24/7/365".