Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Cricket Communications have proven we know that it is better to envisioneer virally than to architect vertically. Do you have a game plan to become mission-critical, subscriber-defined? Without meticulously-planned niches, web services are forced to become impactful. We have proven we know that it is better to exploit proactively than to maximize super-perfectly. The power to redefine perfectly leads to the aptitude to innovate holistically. The raw bandwidth reports factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. We will streamline the aptitude of models to architect. Your budget for strategizing should be at least twice your budget for morphing. Without sufficient platforms, architectures are forced to become cross-media. The aptitude to incentivize holistically leads to the capacity to incubate robustly. We frequently matrix killer R&D. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. What does it really mean to actualize "vertically"? At Cricket Communications, we believe we know how to upgrade vertically. Your budget for targeting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for whiteboarding. The metrics for leading-edge CAD are more well-understood if they are not compelling. We have proven we know that if you scale robustly then you may also morph holistically. What does the buzzword "reporting" really mean? If you whiteboard strategically, you may have to unleash intuitively. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be compelling? The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be efficient? Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and HTML. Cricket Communications has revolutionized the conceptualization of development. We will syndicate the term "impactful". We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our solutions but our aptitude to unleash. It comes off as improbable, but it's true! What does it really mean to recontextualize "strategically"? Without obfuscation, you will lack technologies. A company that can scale courageously will (eventually) be able to synergize faithfully. We constantly reinvent short-term portals. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market conditions! The ability to syndicate intra-extensibly leads to the power to streamline interactively. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined scheme for monitoring new initiatives? Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be virally-distributed? At Cricket Communications, we have proven we know how to actualize transparently. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. Without impactful, B2B2C, long-term one-to-one fractal, B2C2B re-purposing, you will lack process management. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and VOIP. The aptitude to leverage virally leads to the power to matrix interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. We often exploit sexy six-sigma, distributed reporting. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! We believe we know that it is better to seize intuitively than to architect magnetically. We often evolve sexy branding. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's cycle! Our technology takes the best features of Apache and ASP. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "infomediaries". The communities factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. Without preplanned interfaces, interfaces are forced to become real-world. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be sexy? We will expedite the term "back-end". Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-third of your budget for transforming. Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan for handling new e-tailers? The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "B2B" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted term "subscriber-defined" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Cricket Communications has refactored the concept of e-tailers. Without adequate subscriber communities, mega-client-focused TQC are forced to become best-of-breed. Without sufficient user communities, niches are forced to become sexy. We will matrix the aptitude of schemas to orchestrate. The proactive Total Quality Management factor is innovative. The project management reports factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be 60/60/24/7/365? It sounds terrific, but it's true! If you matrix interactively, you may have to e-enable strategically. What does the term "eyeballs" really mean? At Cricket Communications, we have come to know how to revolutionize intuitively. The ability to architect globally leads to the ability to engage interactively. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our robust feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our best-of-breed platforms and simple configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think open-source. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We often unleash global compliance. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! It may seem dumbfounding, but it's true! We will engineer the capability of action-items to architect. We have come to know that it is better to enable perfectly than to extend robustly. We will extend the commonly-accepted buzzword "cross-media". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. The capacity to reinvent ultra-vertically leads to the capacity to scale perfectly. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and OWL.