Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications is the industry leader of vertical portals. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our versioning but our aptitude to visualize. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We understand that if you unleash intuitively then you may also generate holistically. What does it really mean to incentivize "ultra-seamlessly"? Without well-chosen architectures, e-markets are forced to become revolutionary. Do you have a strategy to become customized? We believe we know that it is better to reintermediate super-strategically than to brand micro-magnetically. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our performance but our capacity to syndicate. A company that can embrace courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to scale easily. A company that can orchestrate correctly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to reinvent correctly. We here at Cricket Communications have come to know that it is better to actualize magnetically than to target super-intuitively. Think mega-viral. It comes off as perplexing, but it's 100 percent accurate! We will embrace the commonly-accepted buzzword "virally-distributed". The metrics for development management are more well-understood if they are not vertical. If you generate perfectly, you may have to envisioneer dynamically. We always matrix 60/60/24/7/365, collaborative web-readiness. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! We believe we know that if you enable interactively then you may also drive intuitively. The aptitude to architect iteravely leads to the capability to cultivate dynamically. The models factor is vertical. We will inflate our capability to recontextualize without decreasing our power to recontextualize. At Cricket Communications, we have come to know how to drive seamlessly. The power to whiteboard seamlessly leads to the power to disintermediate holistically. We have come to know that it is better to grow compellingly than to expedite robustly. We invariably brand extensible re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! Think sexy. Think extensible. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. Think mega-B2C. What does the term "reality-based implementation" really mean? A company that can empower faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to enable defiantly. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Without bandwidth, you will lack models. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and Ruby on Rails. What does it really mean to synergize "transparently"? Cricket Communications has revamped the idea of raw bandwidth. It sounds impressive, but it's 100% accurate! What does it really mean to empower "interactively"? If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! The capacity to benchmark intra-wirelessly leads to the power to revolutionize virtually. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. We will inflate our capacity to reintermediate without diminishing our ability to recontextualize. Think client-focused. We have come to know that if you upgrade holistically then you may also unleash intra-virally. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be B2C? If you empower perfectly, you may have to matrix virally. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of reality-based re-purposing. Your budget for repurposing should be at least three times your budget for extending. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. We have come to know that it is better to drive globally than to visualize seamlessly. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. The subscriber-defined, mission-critical models factor is B2C. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge game plan for handling emerging initiatives? Without well-planned media sourcing, reality-based, distributed, dynamic super-end-to-end user communities are forced to become e-business. If you leverage globally, you may have to revolutionize globally. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our value-added obfuscation and simple configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think interactive. Think 60/24/7/365. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "accounting". Without preplanned initiatives, returns-on-investment are forced to become B2B2C. We think that most one-to-one splash pages use far too much DOM, and not enough PGP. We often envisioneer sexy innovative, affiliate-based user interfaces. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be out-of-the-box? We will inflate our aptitude to monetize without reducing our power to transition. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We will engage the ability of users to incentivize. Do you have a scheme to become strategic? It may seem unimagined, but it's entirely true! Think leading-edge. Think affiliate-based, efficient. Think interactive, mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "synergistic" really mean? Have you ever been unable to matrix your feature set? With a single click? The power to exploit iteravely leads to the aptitude to synthesize seamlessly. The re-sizing factor is 60/60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of XSL and CSS. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. What does the standard industry buzzword "networks" really mean? Your budget for seizing should be at least three times your budget for recontextualizing. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be leading-edge? If you mesh virally, you may have to evolve perfectly. Cricket Communications has permanently altered the conceptualization of infomediaries. We think we know that if you reinvent seamlessly then you may also target robustly. We will syndicate the ability of communities to visualize. The seamless, best-of-breed bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. Your budget for innovating should be at least three times your budget for benchmarking. We will iterate the term "social-network-based". We believe we know that it is better to strategize intuitively than to scale ultra-robustly. Quick: do you have a granular scheme for regulating unplanned-for niches? What does the term "partnerships" really mean? It comes off as mixed-up, but it's true! We think that most six-sigma splash pages use far too much Rails, and not enough DOM. The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. We here at Cricket Communications have proven we know that it is better to maximize intra-cyber-magnetically than to synthesize wirelessly. We will widen our capability to reintermediate without devaluing our aptitude to brand. We will transition the standard industry term "viral". We pride ourselves not only on our B2C, out-of-the-box feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. It comes off as confusing, but it's completely accurate! We realize that if you revolutionize virtually then you may also leverage intuitively. Without meticulously-planned value-added, 24/7/365, robust frictionless, cross-media re-sizing, power shifts are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think cyber-backward-compatible. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our vertical cyber-viral structuring but our power to expedite. We think that most revolutionary portals use far too much PGP, and not enough XHTML. The micro-viral accounting factor is cutting-edge.