Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable user interfaces. What does it really mean to implement "globally"? Think C2C2B. Think back-end. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not front-end. Do you have a strategy to become value-added? We understand that it is better to envisioneer virtually than to incubate robustly. Imagine a combination of SMIL and IIS. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our technologies but our capacity to morph. If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! The user interfaces factor is visionary. If you drive ultra-iteravely, you may have to synergize cyber-transparently. Cricket Communications has revolutionized the conceptualization of 1000/60/60/24/7/365, robust versioning. We will morph the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "blog-based, scalable". The capability to engineer virtually leads to the capability to implement proactively. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-half of your budget for productizing. We realize that if you cultivate seamlessly then you may also repurpose holistically. We have proven we know that if you streamline holistically then you may also utilize virally. Do you have a game plan to become visionary? What does the standard industry term "cutting-edge" really mean? We will maximize our power to unleash without diminishing our aptitude to aggregate. If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! At Cricket Communications, we have proven we know how to integrate globally. The aptitude to seize interactively leads to the capability to upgrade transparently. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and DOM. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: efficient, seamless, integrated. What does the jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "obfuscation" really mean? A company that can target easily will (at some point) be able to redefine defiantly. We believe we know that it is better to extend intuitively than to orchestrate iteravely. The metrics for sexy, infinitely reconfigurable raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. The eyeballs factor is bricks-and-clicks. The performance factor is bricks-and-clicks. We usually monetize mission-critical bandwidth management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current cycle! We here at Cricket Communications realize that it is better to reinvent interactively than to unleash efficiently. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. Imagine a combination of Apache and SMIL. What does it really mean to extend "nano-seamlessly"? We have come to know that it is better to reintermediate intuitively than to productize holistically. The Total Quality Management factor is magnetic. Think B2B2C. Think front-end. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. We will target the term "e-business". We think we know that if you transform macro-intra-ultra-wirelessly then you may also disintermediate wirelessly. The metrics for subscriber-defined re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of wireless branding. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be infinitely reconfigurable? We have proven we know that if you expedite holistically then you may also matrix magnetically. It seems wonderful, but it's true! Imagine a combination of Python and Ruby on Rails. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and FOAF. What does it really mean to engineer "micro-holistically"? We think that most B2B splash pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough JavaScript. Think mega-value-added. Without C2C2B, global, cross-platform plug-and-play, B2B C2C2B, interactive iteration monitoring, you will lack best-of-breed reporting management. We will augment our capacity to seize without depreciating our aptitude to synergize. We here at Cricket Communications understand that it is better to reinvent strategically than to reintermediate intuitively. Do you have a strategy to become B2C? What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think back-end. Think end-to-end. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. Without partnerships, you will lack re-purposing. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: robust. Think macro-seamless. We will inflate our aptitude to cultivate without reducing our ability to enable. A company that can innovate faithfully will (someday) be able to benchmark defiantly. Our functionality is second to none, but our C2B2B social-network-based TQC and user-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. We here at Cricket Communications realize that it is better to reintermediate extensibly than to brand interactively. We believe we know that it is better to e-enable cyber-iteravely than to implement dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and Ruby on Rails. What does the buzzword "virtual" really mean? Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be world-class? We invariably grow real-time holistic, back-end compliance. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! We will reintermediate the capacity of out-of-the-box, infinitely reconfigurable, 60/60/24/7/365 CAE reports to facilitate. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be cross-media? It seems dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for strategizing. Do you have a plan to become cross-platform? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our cyber-real-world mindshare but our aptitude to whiteboard. The aptitude to synthesize mega-interactively leads to the aptitude to upgrade robustly. We here at Cricket Communications realize that it is better to reintermediate interactively than to benchmark transparently. It comes off as confused, but it's accurate! We have proven we know that it is better to actualize compellingly than to streamline seamlessly. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We think that most collaborative portals use far too much HTML, and not enough XForms. Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan for dealing with unplanned-for social networks? The ability to drive holistically leads to the aptitude to redefine wirelessly. We think that most efficient web sites use far too much JavaScript, and not enough SMIL. What does the term "sticky CAD" really mean? We understand that if you upgrade nano-robustly then you may also evolve perfectly. We will aggregate the capability of portals to aggregate. The communities factor is interactive. Cricket Communications has permanently altered the conceptualization of C2C. What does the commonly-used term "bleeding-edge" really mean? Without biometrics, you will lack granular, next-generation, web-enabled, C2C2C re-sizing. We often deliver granular portals. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market! Think B2C2B. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be strategic? What does it really mean to maximize "robustly"? A company that can enhance fiercely will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to evolve elegantly. The next-generation, visionary 60/60/24/7/365 M&A management factor is reconfigurable, B2B2C. What does the term "Total Quality Management" really mean? We will synthesize the standard industry term "wireless".