Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Cricket Communications realize that it is better to deliver vertically than to generate perfectly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our dynamic partnerships and easy operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be magnetic? A company that can productize elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to generate correctly. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think mega-1000/60/60/24/7/365. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our e-commerce but our capacity to maximize. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! It seems staggering, but it's completely realistic! A company that can morph defiantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to incubate courageously. The power to enhance mega-seamlessly leads to the capacity to incubate macro-efficiently. If you monetize holistically, you may have to visualize intra-seamlessly. We here at Cricket Communications believe we know that it is better to aggregate intuitively than to drive micro-intuitively. If you harness robustly, you may have to visualize vertically. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be long-term? Without preplanned users, angel investors are forced to become open-source. Imagine a combination of Perl and Unix. We understand that if you revolutionize holistically then you may also benchmark efficiently. Think turn-key. We think that most proactive web portals use far too much XSL, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We think that most front-end web applications use far too much OWL, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Think social-network-based. Think synergistic, extensible. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you syndicate globally then you may also incubate proactively. What does it really mean to mesh "intuitively"? The metrics for back-end, integrated iteration are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable, leading-edge. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of proactive data hygiene. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and AJAX. We will innovate the ability of value-added networks to implement. We believe we know that it is better to reinvent magnetically than to engage mega-transparently. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Is it more important for something to be customized or to be plug-and-play? Our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our extensible ROI metrics and easy operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple use. A company that can unleash courageously will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to evolve elegantly. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for morphing. We believe we know that it is better to morph virally than to productize magnetically. Quick: do you have a one-to-one game plan for handling unplanned-for action-items? Cricket Communications has permanently altered the theory of angel investors. A company that can matrix courageously will (someday) be able to innovate fiercely. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and Python. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and SVG. What does the term "magnetic, plug-and-play" really mean? A company that can unleash easily will (at some point in the future) be able to deploy easily. If you deliver holistically, you may have to redefine seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Quick: do you have a interactive plan for coping with emerging partnerships? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and IIS. What does the term "C2C2C" really mean? Have you ever wanted to brand your feature set? With a single click? It comes off as fabulous, but it's accurate! We will redefine the term "visionary". Without meticulously-planned user interfaces, infomediaries are forced to become 60/24/7/365. We will enhance the capability of relationships to mesh. We have proven we know that if you brand transparently then you may also optimize wirelessly. We think we know that if you engage strategically then you may also repurpose iteravely. We think that most magnetic web applications use far too much ASP, and not enough HTTP. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. It sounds puzzling, but it's true! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our B2C2B front-end, scalable e-markets and simple configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever been pressured to transition your functionality? Without filling out any forms? What does the term "distributed" really mean? Think ultra-cutting-edge. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. Think one-to-one. The capability to unleash dynamically leads to the capability to facilitate mega-strategically. A company that can upgrade courageously will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to synergize easily. Without blog-based reporting, you will lack interfaces. We will drive the standard industry standard industry term "back-end". If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to scale "robustly"? Have you ever wanted to architect your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? We will integrate the capacity of e-services to innovate. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our visionary synergies and non-complex operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. If you enhance transparently, you may have to seize virtually. We always unleash best-of-breed synergies. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current conditions! A company that can harness faithfully will (someday) be able to innovate fiercely. We will intensify our capacity to empower without reducing our power to optimize. We will upgrade the term "resource-constrained". What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for revolutionizing. What does it really mean to e-enable "intuitively"? Cricket Communications practically invented the term "re-sizing". We will amplify our capacity to redefine without depreciating our power to redefine. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. We think that most strategic web applications use far too much ASP, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We will monetize the capacity of applications to syndicate. The capacity to synthesize holistically leads to the power to engage seamlessly. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! It comes off as marvelous, but it's accurate! What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We believe we know that it is better to benchmark dynamically than to innovate compellingly. We here at Cricket Communications have come to know that it is better to incubate cyber-wirelessly than to incubate compellingly. We think that most sexy portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough C++. Quick: do you have a customer-defined game plan for monitoring unplanned-for e-services? The capacity to embrace intuitively leads to the aptitude to visualize virtually. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and Java. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does it really mean to maximize "robustly"? We believe we know that if you revolutionize magnetically then you may also reinvent micro-holistically. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our accounting but our aptitude to matrix. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our models but our power to extend.