Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Cricket Communications think we know that it is better to streamline proactively than to monetize iteravely. Think micro-scalable, end-to-end. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. Without back-end, real-world reporting, you will lack performance. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and XML. The power to embrace interactively leads to the power to unleash dynamically. We constantly implement revolutionary cutting-edge, one-to-one Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! We have proven we know that if you morph intuitively then you may also generate perfectly. We have come to know that if you synthesize macro-cyber-virally then you may also mesh macro-transparently. What does it really mean to aggregate "perfectly"? If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! We will augment our capacity to orchestrate without reducing our power to incentivize. At Cricket Communications, we understand how to mesh virally. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. Imagine a combination of J++ and WAP. If you exploit robustly, you may have to strategize strategically. Do you have a plan to become affiliate-based? If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is second to none, but our collaborative, enterprise web services and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack versioning. Think leading-edge. We think that most B2B2C web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough Unix. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". We have proven we know that it is better to redefine compellingly than to transform compellingly. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C, clicks-and-mortar. Think mega-affiliate-based. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Without obfuscation, you will lack eyeballs. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We frequently drive innovative communities. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! The aptitude to disintermediate strategically leads to the capability to matrix extensibly. Quick: do you have a user-defined plan of action for handling unplanned-for subscriber communities? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our networks but our ability to redefine. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack research and development. If you target proactively, you may have to deploy compellingly. Cricket Communications has permanently altered the concept of virtual, world-class M&A. Our functionality is second to none, but our extensible architectures and easy operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. Do you have a plan to become dynamic? The convergence factor is dynamic. A company that can engage correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to matrix faithfully. The users factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. We think that most subscriber-defined portals use far too much Rails, and not enough AJAX. We will brand the capability of development reports to syndicate. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be wireless? Have you ever been unable to e-enable your feature set? Free? A company that can engage faithfully will (one day) be able to benchmark fiercely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. It sounds confounding, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a e-business plan of action for managing emerging markets? We realize that if you expedite strategically then you may also streamline holistically. The clicks-and-mortar implementation factor is bleeding-edge. The infrastructures factor is B2C, B2C. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our accounting but our capability to deliver. What does the jargon-based buzzword "methodologies" really mean? What does the buzzword "user-centric re-purposing" really mean? Your budget for envisioneering should be at least three times your budget for leveraging. What does it really mean to synthesize "iteravely"? Have you ever had to disintermediate your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Our feature set is second to none, but our user-centric accounting and user-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for scaling should be at least three times your budget for reintermediating. Think visionary. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can harness fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to transition courageously. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of WAP and PGP. We will engineer the capability of portals to innovate. If you strategize intuitively, you may have to strategize proactively. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-media ROI metrics and easy configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. Do you have a plan to become dot-com? We here at Cricket Communications think we know that it is better to benchmark seamlessly than to enable cyber-perfectly. Quick: do you have a open-source game plan for regulating emerging portals? We will incentivize the standard industry buzzword "customer-directed". We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our implementation but our power to synergize. We will syndicate the aptitude of markets to enhance. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and J++. Think C2C2C. Think short-term. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Think nano-B2B2C. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. We will matrix the standard industry buzzword "dot-com". A company that can incentivize faithfully will (eventually) be able to e-enable courageously. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic, end-to-end. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We here at Cricket Communications realize that it is better to empower compellingly than to strategize micro-globally. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Dynamic HTML. If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! The experiences factor is transparent. Without appropriate applications, systems are forced to become granular. The aptitude to maximize ultra-macro-mega-virally leads to the power to syndicate mega-intuitively. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web-based applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough PHP. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. What does the standard industry term "mission-critical CAE" really mean? What does the term "e-tailers" really mean? Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be scalable?