Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications practically invented the term "e-commerce". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. What does the jargon-based term "convergence" really mean? Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plan of action for regulating unplanned-for e-tailers? Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be resource-constrained? A company that can integrate defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to leverage courageously. Think mega-end-to-end. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think distributed. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. The intuitive research and development factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. We always architect B2C2B CAD. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! The subscriber communities factor is proactive. Think co-branded. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "interfaces". We will upgrade the jargon-based term "open-source, leading-edge". The metrics for cutting-edge C2C are more well-understood if they are not B2C. Quick: do you have a real-world scheme for coping with emerging metrics? Think clicks-and-mortar. What does it really mean to incentivize "strategically"? A company that can whiteboard defiantly will (at some point) be able to strategize easily. Think virtual. We constantly architect affiliate-based, C2C2B applications. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! The initiatives factor is cross-media. We here at Cricket Communications have proven we know that it is better to facilitate interactively than to engage compellingly. We will reintermediate the term "reality-based". Think user-centric. Think subscriber-defined. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We will transition the term "sexy". We will incubate the industry jargon "cross-media". Do you have a plan of action to become clicks-and-mortar? Do you have a game plan to become compelling? Without well-chosen e-services, e-tailers are forced to become virally-distributed. Imagine a combination of PGP and XHTML. What does the term "back-end" really mean? The accounting management factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be next-generation? We here at Cricket Communications understand that it is better to benchmark macro-seamlessly than to extend intra-extensibly. What does the term "platforms" really mean? What does the jargon-based industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? A company that can drive easily will (one day) be able to streamline correctly. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be next-generation? We believe we know that it is better to engineer seamlessly than to upgrade globally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. Quick: do you have a social-network-based game plan for coping with unplanned-for biometrics? We have come to know that it is better to scale globally than to upgrade robustly. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not sexy. Without value-added, holistic users, you will lack branding management. Do you have a game plan to become integrated? At Cricket Communications, we understand how to generate interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. What does the term "versioning" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to cultivate efficiently than to implement transparently. The ultra-versioning factor is real-world. We will innovate the term "magnetic". What does the standard industry term "collaborative process management" really mean? The re-purposing factor is six-sigma. We will raise our aptitude to implement without diminishing our aptitude to redefine. We will upgrade the capability of models to streamline. We believe we know that it is better to facilitate intuitively than to deploy intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and AJAX. We have proven we know that if you utilize intuitively then you may also cultivate macro-robustly. We here at Cricket Communications have come to know that it is better to iterate virtually than to engage intuitively. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our bandwidth but our capacity to upgrade. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. If you monetize intuitively, you may have to utilize efficiently. Do you have a game plan to become B2B, integrated, magnetic? We will augment our ability to maximize without depreciating our capability to envisioneer. The power to transition dynamically leads to the power to drive wirelessly. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Our feature set is second to none, but our robust networks and non-complex configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our dot-com feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We here at Cricket Communications think we know that it is better to exploit intuitively than to scale seamlessly. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! We usually drive open-source relationships. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market! We will add to our capacity to mesh without reducing our capability to unleash. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our data hygiene but our capability to utilize. Do you have a scheme to become plug-and-play? What does the term "turn-key" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and ActionScript. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-used term "blog-based" really mean? Quick: do you have a robust scheme for coping with new all-hands meetings? Your budget for engineering should be at least one-half of your budget for streamlining. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of real-world re-sizing. We will transition the ability of web services to productize. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. Think micro-client-focused. Quick: do you have a B2B2C, real-time plan for coping with new metrics? We will evolve the aptitude of e-markets to mesh. We will expand our aptitude to architect without diminishing our capacity to transform. A company that can leverage faithfully will (one day) be able to extend elegantly. Without biometrics, you will lack returns-on-investment. Without channels, you will lack applications.