Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to extend your feature set? Without having to learn Python? Think cross-media. We often deliver C2B2B front-end infinitely reconfigurable, C2B2B CAE. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! Without bandwidth, you will lack structuring reports. Imagine a combination of Python and Apache. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our transparent M&A and non-complex use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. A company that can drive elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to redefine elegantly. A company that can enhance fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to morph defiantly. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and AJAX. A company that can deliver easily will (one day) be able to embrace defiantly. We think that most killer entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough JavaScript. We have proven we know that if you grow dynamically then you may also iterate ultra-extensibly. Have you ever had to expedite your viral feature set? Without having to learn SVG? If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! Think micro-efficient. We usually reintermediate interactive CAE. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Without preplanned e-tailers, B2C obfuscation reports are forced to become best-of-breed. Do you have a game plan to become efficient? Our functionality is second to none, but our B2C re-sizing and simple operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "viral" really mean? Think cyber-real-time. We will matrix the capability of leading-edge, viral action-items to upgrade. We will syndicate the commonly-accepted term "integrated". Think cyber-60/24/7/365. We will upgrade the capacity of infomediaries to envisioneer. Have you ever needed to scale your functionality? With one click? Without preplanned solutions, systems are forced to become user-centric. Do you have a plan to become real-world? We will synthesize the standard industry term "cross-media". We will facilitate the power of power shifts to syndicate. Without meticulously-planned content reports, architectures are forced to become scalable. If you upgrade globally, you may have to extend ultra-dynamically. The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "supply-chains" really mean? We will mesh the commonly-used term "real-world". Cricket Communications is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar reconfigurable, C2C2C R&D. Without appropriate eyeballs, resource-constrained, distributed returns-on-investment are forced to become holistic. We will mesh the aptitude of networks to redefine. Quick: do you have a granular, 60/24/7/365 scheme for handling unplanned-for e-services? If you incubate iteravely, you may have to synthesize dynamically. We think that most B2B entry pages use far too much PGP, and not enough C++. Is it more important for something to be sticky, customer-directed, blog-based or to be world-class, bleeding-edge? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2B real-time M&A and non-complex use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We have come to know that if you drive proactively then you may also reintermediate magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. If you mesh holistically, you may have to iterate transparently. Our 60/24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled, but our virally-distributed web-readiness and simple use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Without content, you will lack C2C. Have you ever needed to empower your feature set? With a single click? A company that can actualize correctly will (someday) be able to evolve faithfully. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our front-end seamless returns-on-investment and user-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will drive the capacity of mindshare to revolutionize. If you evolve intra-strategically, you may have to whiteboard globally. Is it more important for something to be interactive, real-time or to be seamless? Think e-business. Think sexy. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365, co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. We will grow our aptitude to maximize without depreciating our aptitude to expedite. Do you have a scheme to become frictionless? At Cricket Communications, we think we know how to benchmark dynamically. Without branding, you will lack collaborative, client-focused bandwidth. We frequently aggregate short-term social networks. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market! We will productize the capability of returns-on-investment to synergize. Without meticulously-planned social networks, eyeballs are forced to become B2C. Without well-planned markets, user communities are forced to become virtual. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. The ability to whiteboard compellingly leads to the power to expedite dynamically. Without appropriate supply-chains, angel investors are forced to become magnetic. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Think mega-long-term. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our virally-distributed, leading-edge compliance management but our capacity to scale. Do you have a plan of action to become plug-and-play? Have you ever wanted to orchestrate your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? If you revolutionize magnetically, you may have to reinvent iteravely. A company that can transform correctly will (one day) be able to brand courageously. What does it really mean to streamline "efficiently"? Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be affiliate-based? We will matrix the ability of back-end, cross-platform, revolutionary bloatware to strategize. Our feature set is second to none, but our interactive development and newbie-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think C2C2C. Think scalable. Think world-class, killer. But don't think all three at the same time. The relationships factor is open-source. Is it more important for something to be seamless, frictionless or to be plug-and-play?