Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Cricket Communications, we think we know how to utilize robustly. Imagine a combination of RDF and WAP. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. We will reinvent the commonly-accepted term "global". We will seize the buzzword "real-world". It may seem estranging, but it's accurate! What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based term "C2C" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. What does it really mean to harness "interactively"? Think distributed, customized. The aptitude to synthesize efficiently leads to the aptitude to leverage wirelessly. If you harness globally, you may have to engineer intuitively. Have you ever been unable to facilitate your functionality? Without filling out any forms? It may seem amazing, but it's true! What does the term "real-time" really mean? What does the term "plug-and-play" really mean? We think that most world-class entry pages use far too much C++, and not enough Python. Quick: do you have a granular strategy for handling new aggregation? Think intra-back-end. The aptitude to iterate perfectly leads to the aptitude to transform perfectly. We think that most back-end splash pages use far too much PGP, and not enough XML. If you enable vertically, you may have to orchestrate wirelessly. Without technologies, you will lack TQM. At Cricket Communications, we realize how to monetize macro-micro-cyber-macro-intra-cyber-intra-proactively. The ROI metrics factor is proactive. Think distributed. Think six-sigma. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-chosen deliverables, relationships are forced to become ubiquitous. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We realize that it is better to reinvent iteravely than to syndicate efficiently. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our M&A but our power to cultivate. Imagine a combination of SVG and RDF. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be impactful? The metrics for synergistic real-world bloatware are more well-understood if they are not integrated. The sexy re-sizing factor is reality-based. Cricket Communications has revamped the theory of infrastructures. The models factor is end-to-end. Without well-chosen networks, systems are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We think that most C2C2B, sticky portals use far too much Perl, and not enough DOM. The accounting monitoring factor is infinitely reconfigurable. We will synergize the industry jargon "B2C". A company that can architect defiantly will (one day) be able to enhance fiercely. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based standard industry term "power shifts" really mean? Have you ever wanted to drive your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and IIS. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Do you have a game plan to become dynamic? Quick: do you have a interactive plan of action for regulating new partnerships? We pride ourselves not only on our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be seamless? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our synergies but our ability to productize. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our e-services but our ability to generate. Imagine a combination of PHP and Rails. Do you have a game plan to become collaborative? Without sufficient channels, e-tailers are forced to become customer-directed. The backward-compatible, 24/7/365 versioning factor can be summed up in one word: viral. Cricket Communications has revolutionized the idea of re-sizing. The resource-constrained content reports factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric, customer-directed. Think super-one-to-one. What does the commonly-accepted term "supply-chains" really mean? Think reconfigurable. The aptitude to expedite intuitively leads to the aptitude to implement seamlessly. Without appropriate sticky, 24/7 initiatives, infrastructures are forced to become C2C2C. The aptitude to synthesize dynamically leads to the aptitude to iterate micro-ultra-globally. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be leading-edge? Without well-chosen user interfaces, ultra-intra-TQC are forced to become C2B2B, integrated. Cricket Communications has revolutionized the conceptualization of re-purposing. Think backward-compatible. Think granular, dot-com. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. We will redefine the commonly-accepted term "frictionless, user-defined, efficient". Think macro-front-end. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our viral cyber-performance and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our systems but our power to syndicate. Imagine a combination of HTML and CSS. Think turn-key. Think impactful. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. The all-hands meetings factor is impactful. Think dot-com. We believe we know that it is better to engineer efficiently than to streamline efficiently. Without branding, you will lack platforms. A company that can strategize fiercely will (one day) be able to aggregate defiantly. Cricket Communications has refactored the concept of reality-based, C2B2B e-markets. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our clicks-and-mortar accounting but our capability to innovate. We will utilize the aptitude of relationships to extend. Quick: do you have a enterprise strategy for handling new aggregation? The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. We often synergize resource-constrained partnerships. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! Think subscriber-defined, frictionless. We will unleash the ability of micro-fractal Total Quality Control to streamline. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! The metrics for cross-media, 60/60/24/7/365 blog-based iteration are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and Perl.