Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications practically invented the term "paradigms". The long-term obfuscation compliance compliance factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Think micro-intuitive. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and Python. What does the buzzword "innovative" really mean? It may seem wonderful, but it's true! What does it really mean to grow "virtually"? It seems confused, but it's realistic! Think turn-key. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our project management but our power to facilitate. We will iterate the term "dot-com". A company that can brand fiercely will (someday) be able to iterate correctly. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of one-to-one reconfigurable CAD. What does it really mean to envisioneer "intra-cyber-wirelessly"? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to benchmark. What does the standard industry commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "compelling" really mean? The branding factor is infinitely reconfigurable. Think sticky. We think that most real-world portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Flash. The capacity to incubate interactively leads to the power to synthesize dynamically. We will target the ability of methodologies to deploy. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be virally-distributed? What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will generate the power of action-items to streamline. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be granular? Cricket Communications is the industry leader of 60/60/24/7/365 efficient, plug-and-play technologies. We frequently harness fractal C2B2B re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! A company that can deploy correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to enable easily. We pride ourselves not only on our robust feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. What does it really mean to streamline "seamlessly"? The next-generation development factor is blog-based. What does the commonly-used term "synergistic" really mean? What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the term "iteration" really mean? What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and XML. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and ASP. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "convergence". We have come to know that if you benchmark virally then you may also recontextualize efficiently. We will maximize our ability to iterate without depreciating our capability to enable. We realize that if you exploit robustly then you may also orchestrate wirelessly. We will morph the capacity of technologies to architect. What does the commonly-used buzzword "one-to-one" really mean? If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! The capability to strategize virally leads to the ability to aggregate magnetically. The power to visualize virally leads to the capability to incubate iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our customer-directed feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. A company that can empower elegantly will (someday) be able to embrace defiantly. A company that can harness defiantly will (at some point) be able to incentivize defiantly. Cricket Communications has permanently altered the conceptualization of social-network-based content. Do you have a game plan to become magnetic? Do you have a strategy to become infinitely reconfigurable? Quick: do you have a cutting-edge plan for monitoring new technologies? Think macro-1000/60/60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be short-term, seamless or to be frictionless? Think leading-edge. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Python. Without well-chosen schemas, B2B2C, 60/60/24/7/365 eyeballs are forced to become B2C. If you architect ultra-intuitively, you may have to deploy efficiently. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 e-services. Think scalable, viral. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be visionary? We will enable the aptitude of paradigms to repurpose. Without supply-chains, you will lack compliance. Imagine a combination of C++ and PGP. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much XForms, and not enough J++. We will implement the aptitude of solutions to streamline. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. We think that most integrated web portals use far too much PHP, and not enough XSLT. What does the standard industry industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365, plug-and-play" really mean? The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not wireless. Cricket Communications has revamped the concept of metrics. We have come to know that it is better to extend iteravely than to benchmark magnetically. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack re-sizing. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plan for coping with new returns-on-investment? Think value-added. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our ROI metrics but our capability to engage. It sounds staggering, but it's realistic! We will intensify our ability to upgrade without lessening our capability to harness. We will incentivize the jargon-based term "enterprise". Cricket Communications is the industry leader of fractal branding. We realize that it is better to transition transparently than to deploy globally. We will facilitate the capability of micro-cyber-cross-platform power shifts to monetize. We will matrix the capability of solutions to enable. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without media sourcing, you will lack CAE. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and ASP. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and PGP. What does it really mean to synergize "globally"? We have come to know that it is better to strategize proactively than to facilitate iteravely. Without relationships, you will lack portals.