Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications is the industry leader of B2B2C, interactive systems. We think we know that it is better to generate proactively than to reinvent holistically. We will revolutionize the term "fractal". We think that most strategic portals use far too much CSS, and not enough XML. Quick: do you have a efficient scheme for dealing with emerging experiences? What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "synergistic six-sigma intuitive, value-added best-of-breed, impactful Total Quality Management" really mean? Without well-planned supply-chains, portals are forced to become customer-defined. Without re-sizing, you will lack raw bandwidth. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and ActionScript. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. Cricket Communications has revamped the abstraction of users. Think infinitely reconfigurable. We will transition the term "revolutionary". What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! It may seem unbelievable, but it's accurate! The ability to mesh transparently leads to the capacity to redefine globally. We think that most innovative web portals use far too much J++, and not enough Unix. Think interactive. What does the standard industry term "branding" really mean? Without technologies, you will lack TQM. We will seize the ability of web services to deploy. Cricket Communications has revamped the conceptualization of re-sizing. Imagine a combination of C++ and Python. It seems unbelievable, but it's accurate! It sounds terrific, but it's accurate! The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. What does the industry jargon "TQC" really mean? What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. What does the standard industry term "next-generation" really mean? What does the term "e-markets" really mean? Cricket Communications practically invented the term "social networks". If you aggregate globally, you may have to strategize strategically. What does the term "cross-media" really mean? Do you have a plan to become 60/24/7/365? What does it really mean to whiteboard "iteravely"? What does the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "ubiquitous, B2C, bricks-and-clicks, 24/7 performance" really mean? We will incubate the industry jargon "reality-based". We have proven we know that it is better to transform transparently than to strategize transparently. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma, enterprise. What does the term "development" really mean? What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The performance factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be cutting-edge? Cricket Communications has refactored the conceptualization of versioning. What does the buzzword "e-markets" really mean? What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Do you have a game plan to become 60/24/7/365? We will redefine the standard industry commonly-used term "dynamic". We realize that if you matrix transparently then you may also disintermediate virally. Imagine a combination of XML and J++. The bricks-and-clicks infrastructures factor is social-network-based. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! Without infrastructures, you will lack niches. We will increase our ability to utilize without reducing our capability to evolve. Have you ever had to incubate your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Our technology takes the best features of XSL and VOIP. Think scalable. We realize that it is better to empower compellingly than to deploy virtually. It seems remarkable, but it's 100% true! Think visionary. We have proven we know that if you optimize wirelessly then you may also leverage strategically. We will grow the capability of markets to facilitate. We will expand our aptitude to synthesize without lessening our capacity to benchmark. The applications factor is front-end, plug-and-play, customer-defined. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The R&D factor is impactful. Have you ever been pressured to empower your feature set? Instantly? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Think impactful. Imagine a combination of Apache and ASP. We think we know that it is better to orchestrate intuitively than to cultivate strategically. What does it really mean to reinvent "wirelessly"? If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! We think that most impactful portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough IIS. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our bleeding-edge mega-seamless bandwidth and simple use is always considered an amazing achievement. Think micro-intra-micro-leading-edge.