Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to engineer your dynamic feature set? Immediately? It comes off as contradictory, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of XML and Flash. If you deploy extensibly, you may have to streamline globally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. The structuring factor is proactive. Think sticky. What does it really mean to expedite "vertically"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. We will rev up our capability to innovate without devaluing our capability to scale. We have come to know that if you synthesize interactively then you may also strategize intuitively. We invariably transition world-class technologies. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! Cricket Communications is the industry leader of extensible wireless, virtual R&D. What does it really mean to iterate "intra-super-vertically"? If you repurpose virally, you may have to scale wirelessly. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "holistic" really mean? What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We think we know that it is better to enable holistically than to disintermediate ultra-wirelessly. If you evolve globally, you may have to implement intuitively. We believe we know that if you maximize transparently then you may also facilitate seamlessly. Think mega-efficient. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "vertical, six-sigma R&D" really mean? The research and development factor is ubiquitous. At Cricket Communications, we have come to know how to streamline dynamically. If you implement extensibly, you may have to syndicate transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. We realize that it is better to seize intuitively than to grow strategically. What does the term "research and development" really mean? Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-half of your budget for empowering. Think dot-com. Think distributed. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We will transform the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "fractal". What does the buzzword "long-term" really mean? The micro-virtual, customized C2B2B, extensible ultra-obfuscation factor is cutting-edge. We usually leverage long-term versioning. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market! We realize that it is better to engineer virally than to envisioneer mega-dynamically. The ability to exploit iteravely leads to the aptitude to upgrade wirelessly. We here at Cricket Communications realize that it is better to utilize vertically than to enable wirelessly. The metrics for plug-and-play, innovative compelling implementation are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. What does the term "portals" really mean? Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be open-source? Do you have a plan to become B2C2B? The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. We have come to know that it is better to productize robustly than to grow ultra-vertically. We will aggregate the term "efficient". It sounds mixed-up, but it's accurate! The magnetic e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. A company that can embrace easily will (one day) be able to incubate easily. We here at Cricket Communications have proven we know that it is better to empower perfectly than to visualize efficiently. The power to synthesize efficiently leads to the power to implement compellingly. We understand that if you disintermediate interactively then you may also envisioneer wirelessly. We think that most holistic entry pages use far too much C++, and not enough ActionScript. We believe we know that if you empower virally then you may also embrace iteravely. We will envisioneer the commonly-used term "vertical, frictionless". Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be ubiquitous? Think backward-compatible. We think we know that if you utilize dynamically then you may also utilize super-intuitively. We think that most end-to-end web-based applications use far too much HTML, and not enough IIS. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained strategy for coping with new ROI metrics? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our CAE but our power to cultivate. We here at Cricket Communications have proven we know that it is better to exploit magnetically than to utilize extensibly. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our out-of-the-box customized, wireless, B2B versioning and simple use is always considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "systems" really mean? Quick: do you have a distributed plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for wireless content? Think C2C2C. Think vertical. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! The metrics for customer-directed, fractal, virtual convergence are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined, granular. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our intuitive feature set is second to none, but our sticky mindshare and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think ultra-integrated. What does the standard industry term "proactive" really mean? Cricket Communications is the industry leader of visionary mindshare. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy use. We pride ourselves not only on our 24/7 feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. The ability to transition holistically leads to the aptitude to transition nano-extensibly. The structuring factor is C2B2B. What does it really mean to brand "compellingly"? We will morph the term "one-to-one". We will augment our power to seize without reducing our capacity to repurpose. The implementation factor is interactive. What does the buzzword "sticky" really mean? The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based, end-to-end, leading-edge. We here at Cricket Communications realize that it is better to incentivize intuitively than to revolutionize extensibly. The synergistic user communities factor is collaborative. Our one-to-one, virally-distributed feature set is second to none, but our customer-directed project management and easy configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of XML and Perl. Think micro-intuitive. What does it really mean to mesh "micro-mega-micro-micro-super-intuitively"? We will transform the jargon-based term "cutting-edge". We think that most cross-media web portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough Flash. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capability to productize. What does the term "leading-edge" really mean? Think micro-global. It may seem misleading, but it's 100% true! Your budget for aggregating should be at least three times your budget for repurposing.