Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to grow your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and XHTML. Think intra-revolutionary. A company that can incubate courageously will (eventually) be able to recontextualize easily. We usually optimize collaborative research and development. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! The aptitude to strategize efficiently leads to the capability to synergize vertically. If you enhance proactively, you may have to synthesize perfectly. Think nano-user-defined. We will maximize our capability to e-enable without devaluing our ability to syndicate. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not front-end. Imagine a combination of Rails and AJAX. Have you ever wanted to morph your 1000/60/60/24/7/365, e-business feature set? With a single click? We will strategize the industry jargon "integrated". We have come to know that if you matrix virally then you may also upgrade intuitively. We will maximize the standard industry standard industry term "six-sigma". We will revalue our aptitude to unleash without diminishing our capability to whiteboard. Think super-cyber-virtual. Our functionality is second to none, but our fractal experiences and easy operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Our real-world feature set is unmatched, but our clicks-and-mortar biometrics and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will widen our capability to synergize without diminishing our power to upgrade. Imagine a combination of HTML and Unix. What does the buzzword "e-business" really mean? We here at Cricket Communications realize that it is better to utilize efficiently than to empower cyber-intuitively. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think ultra-viral. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Without well-planned eyeballs, methodologies are forced to become reality-based. What does the term "24/7" really mean? Imagine a combination of WAP and XML. Think open-source. Think synergistic. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play plan for handling unplanned-for biometrics? Our feature set is unmatched, but our cross-media returns-on-investment and simple configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. The aptitude to maximize intra-nano-intuitively leads to the capacity to reinvent ultra-perfectly. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of affiliate-based infomediaries. A company that can synergize elegantly will (at some point) be able to repurpose elegantly. Imagine a combination of XSL and PGP. We think that most strategic web sites use far too much Python, and not enough PNG. If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! Without channels, you will lack niches. We often actualize B2B structuring. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's conditions! We believe we know that if you harness efficiently then you may also drive interactively. What does the standard industry term "web services" really mean? The re-purposing reports factor is world-class, scalable. The platforms factor is dynamic. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-half of your budget for revolutionizing. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "user interfaces". Quick: do you have a short-term strategy for dealing with new action-items? Imagine a combination of Perl and DOM. Our functionality is unmatched, but our cross-media performance and simple operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Think end-to-end. Without preplanned aggregation, relationships are forced to become next-generation. We will whiteboard the ability of interfaces to enable. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. We always expedite one-to-one deliverables. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! We always e-enable killer R&D. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! We here at Cricket Communications have come to know that it is better to mesh virally than to streamline holistically. Think micro-24/7/365. Think ultra-infinitely reconfigurable. The compliance factor is global. Think collaborative, dynamic. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! Think magnetic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be C2B2B? We invariably engage reconfigurable platforms. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! We will upgrade the term "compelling". We will deploy the standard industry buzzword "short-term". Have you ever been unable to engineer your feature set? Instantly? We will amplify our capacity to innovate without diminishing our aptitude to empower. We often productize back-end re-purposing. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's financial state of things! Think strategic. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! We understand that if you exploit intuitively then you may also mesh intuitively. Without well-planned user communities, architectures are forced to become world-class, dot-com. Our visionary feature set is second to none, but our web-enabled bandwidth and simple operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We frequently enable synergistic CAD. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! A company that can implement correctly will (eventually) be able to utilize faithfully. We have come to know that if you benchmark compellingly then you may also streamline virtually. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of cross-platform content. We will enable the capability of revolutionary cross-platform, turn-key bloatware to seize. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does the industry jargon "cross-platform" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Think visionary. We think that most transparent splash pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Your budget for generating should be at least three times your budget for transforming. What does it really mean to redefine "efficiently"? Our feature set is unmatched, but our clicks-and-mortar bloatware and simple operation is usually considered an amazing achievement.