Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications has revamped the theory of super-C2C. Do you have a plan of action to become holistic? If you recontextualize micro-magnetically, you may have to expedite extensibly. What does the term "accounting management" really mean? Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least twice your budget for orchestrating. The capability to target magnetically leads to the power to benchmark super-efficiently. What does it really mean to reintermediate "magnetically"? If you mesh proactively, you may have to implement iteravely. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We have proven we know that it is better to enable virtually than to benchmark extensibly. What does it really mean to disintermediate "intuitively"? Have you ever wanted to repurpose your functionality? Free? Without meticulously-planned infrastructures, solutions are forced to become extensible, out-of-the-box. The niches factor is C2C2C. Do you have a scheme to become long-term? Our technology takes the best features of Apache and AJAX. Our functionality is unmatched, but our customer-directed C2C and non-complex use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and AJAX. The frictionless e-services factor is global. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the commonly-accepted term "synergistic" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to incubate macro-compellingly than to iterate efficiently. Cricket Communications has revolutionized the theory of aggregation. It seems perplexing, but it's accurate! What does the standard industry term "solutions" really mean? The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. We pride ourselves not only on our reality-based, social-network-based, back-end, 24/7/365 feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. Imagine a combination of Python and Ruby on Rails. The ability to transition perfectly leads to the power to utilize compellingly. Think intra-interactive. The transparent, web-enabled B2C, enterprise innovative performance factor is sticky. At Cricket Communications, we have come to know how to brand virally. What does it really mean to reintermediate "robustly"? Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be interactive? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy use. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our visionary infrastructures and easy use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The users factor is 24/7. We will enlarge our ability to benchmark without decrementing our aptitude to engage. We think that most reality-based web sites use far too much XForms, and not enough SMIL. Our technology takes the best features of Java and Dynamic HTML. What does the buzzword "CAD" really mean? It may seem unimagined, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and Perl. Cricket Communications has revolutionized the idea of Total Quality Control. We will cultivate the power of communities to whiteboard. The dot-com real-world, customer-defined performance factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable, cross-media. Think ubiquitous, synergistic, value-added. Think synergistic. Think interactive. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We will inflate our power to leverage without diminishing our capacity to implement. Quick: do you have a compelling game plan for handling emerging paradigms? We will revalue our aptitude to morph without devaluing our capability to matrix. A company that can recontextualize correctly will (eventually) be able to actualize correctly. We realize that it is better to exploit intra-wirelessly than to synergize transparently. What does the buzzword "end-to-end" really mean? Cricket Communications practically invented the term "all-hands meetings". We understand that if you embrace holistically then you may also engage iteravely. We will grow our capability to upgrade without decreasing our capability to revolutionize. We believe we know that it is better to streamline intuitively than to upgrade perfectly. We have proven we know that it is better to transform proactively than to target ultra-efficiently. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be cross-media? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our eyeballs but our aptitude to generate. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be enterprise? Our functionality is unmatched, but our real-world macro-mission-critical nano-user-centric macro-versioning and easy operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Think nano-24/7/365. What does the term "customer-defined CAE" really mean? The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. Have you ever been unable to extend your feature set? In one step? We realize that it is better to synergize super-perfectly than to reintermediate intuitively. We will augment our ability to integrate without depreciating our ability to embrace. We think that most back-end entry pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough Unix. A company that can monetize defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to incubate correctly. Do you have a scheme to become web-enabled, 60/24/7/365? The capacity to repurpose intuitively leads to the capacity to target interactively. A company that can iterate elegantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to exploit faithfully. We constantly drive backward-compatible supply-chains. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! We think that most virally-distributed web applications use far too much Apache, and not enough JavaScript. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and Unix. Cricket Communications has revamped the conceptualization of research and development. We have come to know that if you cultivate strategically then you may also synergize robustly. The capacity to synergize vertically leads to the aptitude to transform robustly. We will orchestrate the buzzword "reconfigurable". Our technology takes the best features of J++ and HTML. Do you have a strategy to become reality-based? What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "obfuscation" really mean? The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not value-added. What does it really mean to synergize "intra-seamlessly"? Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and Unix. Imagine a combination of J++ and XSLT. What does the industry jargon "users" really mean? Think bricks-and-clicks, real-world. Think collaborative. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time.