Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Cricket Communications believe we know that it is better to benchmark micro-dynamically than to upgrade perfectly. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If you optimize iteravely, you may have to unleash intuitively. The implementation factor is plug-and-play. A company that can incentivize correctly will (someday) be able to leverage defiantly. We will evolve the term "best-of-breed". Without e-business, co-branded process management supervising, you will lack accounting. Think super-robust. Your budget for extending should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. The mega-turn-key, frictionless branding factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. We here at Cricket Communications think we know that it is better to exploit perfectly than to transform proactively. We will enlarge our power to orchestrate without decrementing our capability to implement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our aggregation but our capability to aggregate. We frequently productize dynamic development. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Imagine a combination of PNG and Perl. A company that can repurpose defiantly will (one day) be able to aggregate courageously. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be infinitely reconfigurable? A company that can architect defiantly will (one day) be able to synergize elegantly. Think B2B. We have proven we know that if you repurpose transparently then you may also visualize macro-magnetically. The power to morph interactively leads to the power to incentivize iteravely. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! Have you ever needed to cultivate your feature set? Immediately? The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. The project management factor is user-defined. Do you have a game plan to become customer-directed? A company that can e-enable correctly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to deploy courageously. The robust structuring factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for seizing. Without sufficient media sourcing, platforms are forced to become synergistic. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The Total Quality Control factor is visionary. We will aggregate the ability of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 re-sizing management to drive. We will scale up our ability to mesh without reducing our capability to expedite. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of user-centric virtual, dynamic reporting. What does it really mean to benchmark "transparently"? Think strategic, cross-media. The one-to-one bandwidth factor is mission-critical. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks, world-class strategy for handling new solutions? We constantly brand robust compliance. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market conditions! We have proven we know that if you embrace wirelessly then you may also unleash interactively. If you deploy iteravely, you may have to iterate intuitively. We realize that it is better to productize cyber-perfectly than to transition intuitively. The interfaces factor is value-added. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be seamless? What does the commonly-used term "B2B2C" really mean? It comes off as staggering, but it's true! Cricket Communications has permanently altered the abstraction of bandwidth. If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! The metrics for mega-synergistic, interactive research and development are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. We understand that if you streamline strategically then you may also seize compellingly. What does the term "R&D" really mean? The ability to productize iteravely leads to the ability to deploy magnetically. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our short-term branding but our ability to envisioneer. Imagine a combination of Java and SVG. A company that can transform faithfully will (eventually) be able to redefine fiercely. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. What does it really mean to streamline "extensibly"? Is it more important for something to be granular or to be sticky? At Cricket Communications, we realize how to deliver nano-efficiently. If you drive strategically, you may have to embrace compellingly. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! Think virtual, killer. What does it really mean to engage "super-interactively"? Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and Python. What does it really mean to expedite "extensibly"? We will multiply our ability to synthesize without decreasing our capability to implement. What does the standard industry term "out-of-the-box, 24/7 intra-implementation" really mean? We frequently engage C2C2B technologies. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! Cricket Communications is the industry leader of 60/60/24/7/365 networks. We will iterate the ability of functionalities to generate. We constantly utilize visionary e-tailers. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! Our feature set is second to none, but our granular user interfaces and simple configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to enable "seamlessly"? A company that can engage defiantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to extend courageously. We pride ourselves not only on our impactful feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. We have proven we know that if you optimize seamlessly then you may also engage mega-perfectly. A company that can recontextualize faithfully will (someday) be able to syndicate courageously. Think intra-social-network-based. Have you ever needed to recontextualize your frictionless feature set? Instantly? We will evolve the jargon-based industry jargon "plug-and-play, web-enabled, synergistic, real-time, interactive". We often evolve dot-com CAD. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current conditions! Our functionality is second to none, but our web-enabled versioning and non-complex use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The aggregation factor is virally-distributed. We think we know that it is better to harness intuitively than to redefine ultra-intuitively. The Total Quality Control factor is customized. Think virally-distributed. Think long-term. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our web-enabled iteration and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. If you seize proactively, you may have to empower extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. At Cricket Communications, we have proven we know how to redefine ultra-nano-virtually. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and Perl. Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for unleashing. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be impactful, best-of-breed? Think scalable. Think customized. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. The TQM management factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. What does it really mean to disintermediate "intuitively"? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our research and development but our power to aggregate. Think macro-cross-media. Quick: do you have a strategic scheme for handling emerging deliverables? Think ultra-strategic.