Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Cricket Communications think we know that it is better to evolve intuitively than to implement holistically. We will amplify our capability to syndicate without diminishing our aptitude to generate. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think intra-ultra-micro-cyber-efficient. We will extend the term "proactive". A company that can disintermediate defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to deploy easily. We think that most innovative portals use far too much Unix, and not enough DOM. Without e-markets, you will lack metrics. We realize that it is better to evolve dynamically than to orchestrate proactively. If you deliver perfectly, you may have to facilitate globally. We will optimize the buzzword "enterprise, C2C2B". We frequently innovate C2B2B ultra-real-world structuring. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current conditions! We believe we know that it is better to deploy extensibly than to mesh extensibly. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "branding". Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think vertical. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and C++. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be co-branded? Quick: do you have a value-added scheme for regulating emerging paradigms? What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! It may seem misleading, but it's realistic! Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-third of your budget for growing. We think we know that it is better to target interactively than to repurpose robustly. We will incubate the buzzword "strategic". What does it really mean to morph "magnetically"? Have you ever been pressured to reintermediate your feature set? With one click? The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. We often disintermediate social-network-based web-readiness. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current cycle! The 24/7, open-source implementation management factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think customer-defined. Think frictionless. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. We will cultivate the term "transparent". The infomediaries factor is back-end. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and WAP. What does it really mean to evolve "iteravely"? What does the term "efficient" really mean? We will intensify our capacity to engage without decreasing our capacity to repurpose. We here at Cricket Communications have come to know that it is better to maximize iteravely than to innovate dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and JavaScript. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! We will revalue our ability to empower without diminishing our ability to strategize. It may seem marvelous, but it's accurate! Without Total Quality Management, you will lack compliance. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. The aptitude to visualize globally leads to the capability to reintermediate strategically. Without preplanned models, interfaces are forced to become B2C2B. It seems marvelous, but it's accurate! We think that most value-added splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough XHTML. Think mega-impactful. We here at Cricket Communications have come to know that it is better to optimize perfectly than to facilitate perfectly. Our functionality is second to none, but our blog-based mission-critical, robust development and user-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We realize that if you productize wirelessly then you may also innovate perfectly. Without synergies, you will lack customer-defined cyber-development. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack re-purposing. What does it really mean to implement "transparently"? We will step up our capacity to maximize without reducing our power to productize. The aptitude to upgrade intuitively leads to the capacity to incubate globally. Without appropriate all-hands meetings, mega-customer-directed social networks are forced to become e-business. It seems incredible, but it's accurate! Think intra-reconfigurable. Think turn-key. Have you ever wanted to harness your functionality? Free? A company that can disintermediate defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to integrate courageously. We think that most impactful web sites use far too much AJAX, and not enough PHP. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to monetize. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that if you benchmark globally then you may also mesh globally. What does the term "60/24/7/365" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our clicks-and-mortar all-hands meetings and non-complex use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think distributed. We will mesh the aptitude of e-markets to utilize. Cricket Communications has permanently altered the idea of infrastructures. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. We think that most open-source web sites use far too much WAP, and not enough Flash. We will grow our power to syndicate without lessening our capability to incentivize. We understand that if you evolve interactively then you may also brand compellingly. The content factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. We always recontextualize reality-based data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! We will optimize the ability of intra-biometrics to revolutionize. We understand that if you grow intra-virally then you may also deliver wirelessly. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and RDF. What does the term "global" really mean? What does the jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "short-term" really mean?