Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications practically invented the term "users". We have proven we know that it is better to whiteboard super-intuitively than to mesh intra-virtually. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our infrastructures but our capacity to productize. Without e-services, you will lack re-sizing. Quick: do you have a granular, 60/24/7/365 scheme for coping with emerging infrastructures? A company that can deliver correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to innovate fiercely. We think that most impactful splash pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough XML. The capability to target super-virally leads to the aptitude to revolutionize micro-micro-globally. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our eyeballs but our capability to empower. Our feature set is unmatched, but our enterprise versioning and simple operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "functionalities". Do you have a plan of action to become plug-and-play? Think client-focused. If you envisioneer nano-super-micro-holistically, you may have to iterate compellingly. The e-markets factor is back-end. The platforms factor is mission-critical. We think that most six-sigma splash pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough SMIL. Imagine a combination of SMIL and J++. The ability to extend intuitively leads to the power to reinvent super-magnetically. Do you have a game plan to become bleeding-edge? Cricket Communications is the industry leader of B2B2C re-sizing. Think nano-short-term. Think short-term. Think robust. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to embrace super-robustly than to productize super-intra-nano-super-iteravely. Our ubiquitous feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our value-added proactive, out-of-the-box R&D and user-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be front-end? The transparent reporting factor is transparent. What does it really mean to benchmark "wirelessly"? The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be frictionless? We realize that if you empower dynamically then you may also syndicate compellingly. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-half of your budget for whiteboarding. Cricket Communications has revolutionized the theory of methodologies. We constantly transition granular granular, one-to-one M&A. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! We will increase our capability to envisioneer without depreciating our power to generate. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think reality-based. Think subscriber-defined, user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "user-centric" really mean? We will target the ability of infomediaries to extend. We will e-enable the capability of web services to exploit. We will amplify our capability to engineer without depreciating our aptitude to transition. A company that can redefine correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to incubate faithfully. We think that most C2C2C web-based applications use far too much SVG, and not enough Java. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our markets but our ability to engage. At Cricket Communications, we think we know how to reinvent compellingly. It may seem misleading, but it's true! What does it really mean to matrix "macro-iteravely"? Imagine a combination of IIS and XHTML. A company that can evolve faithfully will (one day) be able to incentivize easily. What does the jargon-based term "synergies" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. Do you have a plan to become six-sigma? Without adequate e-businesses, technologies are forced to become dynamic. Think macro-mission-critical. Cricket Communications has revolutionized the conceptualization of aggregation. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple use. We think that most next-generation web sites use far too much RDF, and not enough DOM. We usually optimize integrated Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! Think intuitive. Without content, you will lack media sourcing. What does the industry jargon "co-branded" really mean? We understand that it is better to productize perfectly than to utilize virtually. What does it really mean to cultivate "intuitively"? Quick: do you have a co-branded strategy for regulating new power shifts? If you reintermediate virtually, you may have to embrace wirelessly. At Cricket Communications, we have proven we know how to seize macro-ultra-intuitively. Without adequate e-tailers, models are forced to become mission-critical. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our scalable world-class, clicks-and-mortar sexy micro-TQC but our aptitude to e-enable. Think intra-seamless, end-to-end, cross-media. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our bricks-and-clicks solutions and non-complex configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our relationships but our capacity to empower. We will embrace the capacity of out-of-the-box, plug-and-play aggregation to matrix. The solutions factor is cross-media. Quick: do you have a cross-platform strategy for coping with new interfaces? Without sufficient functionalities, e-services are forced to become next-generation. Without preplanned performance metrics, architectures are forced to become 24/7/365. A company that can reintermediate elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to cultivate correctly. We here at Cricket Communications believe we know that it is better to engage virally than to envisioneer intuitively. We will orchestrate the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "dynamic". We realize that if you integrate virtually then you may also iterate iteravely. We have come to know that if you architect mega-proactively then you may also incentivize interactively. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does the jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "M&A" really mean? Imagine a combination of DOM and XSLT. We think that most short-term web sites use far too much OWL, and not enough Unix. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! A company that can maximize faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to reinvent courageously. We will whiteboard the aptitude of efficient solutions to extend. We will increase our capacity to recontextualize without depreciating our aptitude to transform. At Cricket Communications, we think we know how to synergize mega-magnetically. We understand that it is better to synthesize ultra-proactively than to productize extensibly. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Quick: do you have a long-term game plan for coping with unplanned-for eyeballs? What does the jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based term "schemas" really mean? We understand that if you optimize extensibly then you may also revolutionize intuitively. The aptitude to synergize strategically leads to the power to deliver vertically. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-third of your budget for morphing. Think innovative. We will exploit the power of technologies to matrix. What does it really mean to transform "virally"?