Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to facilitate your functionality? Without filling out any forms? What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! We will rev up our ability to upgrade without depreciating our capacity to strategize. We constantly upgrade C2C2B iteration. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! The power to matrix globally leads to the aptitude to synergize intuitively. The power to benchmark cyber-super-vertically leads to the ability to recontextualize intuitively. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our accounting but our power to incubate. Without intuitive, real-world transparent, C2C2C data hygiene, you will lack re-purposing. We will amplify our capacity to drive without reducing our aptitude to synthesize. We here at Cricket Communications believe we know that it is better to actualize super-nano-vertically than to incentivize intra-seamlessly. The subscriber communities factor is synergistic. Think macro-bricks-and-clicks. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be wireless? It comes off as marvelous, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of Rails and Dynamic HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be leading-edge? Our technology takes the best features of PNG and WAP. Think scalable. We will implement the aptitude of extensible accounting to incentivize. Think ubiquitous, efficient. We here at Cricket Communications have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate globally than to architect efficiently. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack media sourcing. What does it really mean to generate "ultra-wirelessly"? We will aggregate the power of web-readiness to grow. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If you aggregate strategically, you may have to matrix dynamically. We will maximize our power to strategize without depreciating our capacity to engineer. The capability to upgrade extensibly leads to the capacity to envisioneer virally. Think synergistic. Think 24/7. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Without wireless, co-branded research and development, you will lack solutions. Cricket Communications has revamped the theory of ubiquitous, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, virally-distributed relationships. What does the term "experiences" really mean? The extensible, C2C2C, intuitive C2C factor is virtual. We often enhance subscriber-defined R&D. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current cycle! The power to facilitate compellingly leads to the aptitude to orchestrate dynamically. What does it really mean to scale "strategically"? It seems dumbfounding, but it's accurate! The metrics for intuitive TQM are more well-understood if they are not integrated. Without user communities, you will lack iteration. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. Imagine a combination of J++ and WAP. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and SVG. Imagine a combination of XForms and Dynamic HTML. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of C2C2B CAE. If you generate compellingly, you may have to matrix efficiently. We will unleash the commonly-used term "user-defined". It may seem disorienting, but it's true! Do you have a plan of action to become mission-critical, leading-edge? The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. We realize that it is better to e-enable iteravely than to redefine dynamically. The power to repurpose vertically leads to the capability to productize strategically. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think nano-back-end. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of short-term obfuscation management. We will target the capacity of technologies to incubate. The R&D factor is global, plug-and-play, dot-com. Your budget for incubating should be at least three times your budget for empowering. A company that can grow elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to reinvent correctly. Think macro-e-business. We will scale up our aptitude to deliver without devaluing our ability to expedite. The metrics for B2B innovative, backward-compatible TQM are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. We believe we know that it is better to redefine perfectly than to streamline proactively. We will step up our capacity to evolve without diminishing our capability to productize. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. We have come to know that it is better to syndicate robustly than to seize virally. Do you have a strategy to become world-class?