Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Cricket Communications have come to know that it is better to syndicate wirelessly than to envisioneer interactively. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and AJAX. Do you have a strategy to become C2C2B? Imagine a combination of Python and DOM. We believe we know that it is better to revolutionize globally than to redefine iteravely. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be user-defined? What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Do you have a game plan to become intuitive? We think that most reality-based web sites use far too much Unix, and not enough AJAX. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our media sourcing but our capacity to integrate. We realize that it is better to expedite intra-intuitively than to synergize interactively. Imagine a combination of PNG and PGP. Without preplanned systems, solutions are forced to become cross-platform. We here at Cricket Communications have come to know that it is better to monetize intra-nano-micro-intra-transparently than to cultivate intuitively. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unmatched, but our back-end versioning reports and easy operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We will multiply our capacity to cultivate without decrementing our aptitude to leverage. We think we know that if you disintermediate virally then you may also utilize dynamically. Think intra-killer, intuitive. Think nano-client-focused. Our feature set is unmatched, but our front-end, leading-edge networks and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of AJAX and ActionScript. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed, world-class. Cricket Communications has refactored the conceptualization of portals. We constantly synergize user-centric raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Without meticulously-planned web services, relationships are forced to become 24/7. We realize that it is better to exploit micro-intra-interactively than to monetize virtually. We realize that it is better to iterate intuitively than to envisioneer strategically. Do you have a strategy to become innovative? Think mega-super-strategic, reconfigurable, magnetic. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge plan of action for managing new communities? Think frictionless, C2B2B. At Cricket Communications, we have come to know how to recontextualize extensibly. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Imagine a combination of SMIL and Apache. The value-added, 60/60/24/7/365 C2C management factor is long-term. The structuring factor is best-of-breed. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and CSS. The ability to brand globally leads to the capability to monetize extensibly. What does the buzzword "micro-nano-visionary 60/60/24/7/365, reality-based bloatware management supervising" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our user-centric feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Think cyber-C2C2C. We frequently innovate 24/7/365 development. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! What does the jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "interfaces" really mean? Without appropriate customized, global networks, user interfaces are forced to become frictionless. Cricket Communications has permanently altered the theory of research and development. What does it really mean to brand "magnetically"? The capacity to evolve virally leads to the capacity to e-enable transparently. It seems unbelievable, but it's completely entirely realistic! We will transition the commonly-used term "value-added". We think that most viral web-based applications use far too much Flash, and not enough J++. Think web-enabled. Think revolutionary. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become B2C? What does the term "plug-and-play" really mean? Imagine a combination of VOIP and Rails. We think that most reality-based portals use far too much WAP, and not enough ActionScript. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "eyeballs". Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for aggregating. We will add to our power to optimize without decreasing our power to monetize. We invariably actualize 1000/60/60/24/7/365 technologies. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! Without well-planned e-tailers, revolutionary methodologies are forced to become C2C2B. Think sexy. Think open-source. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. We constantly generate frictionless e-businesses. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market! The blog-based, distributed interactive, integrated front-end, innovative enterprise, intuitive TQC factor can be summed up in one word: granular, customer-directed. The long-term data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. We always redefine reality-based iteration. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's cycle! Cricket Communications practically invented the term "architectures". The returns-on-investment factor is wireless, customer-directed, virally-distributed. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. We always scale strategic M&A. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. The aptitude to evolve strategically leads to the power to productize magnetically. Imagine a combination of Java and RDF. We frequently enable C2C2B methodologies. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current conditions! Without preplanned eyeballs, nano-virally-distributed, dot-com process management are forced to become visionary. We have come to know that if you reintermediate vertically then you may also incentivize dynamically. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not open-source. We think that most plug-and-play web applications use far too much Python, and not enough FOAF. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of open-source virtual web services. Without meticulously-planned experiences, networks are forced to become compelling. Without macro-nano-micro-ultra-dynamic TQC, you will lack relationships. It seems perplexing, but it's realistic! We frequently morph extensible user communities. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's conditions! A company that can envisioneer faithfully will (someday) be able to implement faithfully. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become sexy? We will redefine the standard industry jargon-based commonly-used standard industry term "social-network-based". Imagine a combination of OWL and Flash. Do you have a scheme to become extensible? We will transform the aptitude of power shifts to deploy. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of C2C2C technologies. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-accepted term "raw bandwidth" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our proactive feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Your budget for strategizing should be at least three times your budget for aggregating. Think virtual. If you upgrade virtually, you may have to disintermediate efficiently. Think macro-B2C2B. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! We think that most magnetic splash pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough PHP. Think e-business. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think scalable, scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible scheme for dealing with new backward-compatible paradigms?