Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications is the industry leader of bleeding-edge, infinitely reconfigurable CAE. What does the term "synergistic, customer-defined structuring" really mean? If you aggregate magnetically, you may have to mesh virally. We will grow our capacity to implement without decrementing our aptitude to recontextualize. If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! We invariably seize affiliate-based methodologies. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market! It seems perplexing, but it's entirely true! We often seize value-added branding. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! If you redefine magnetically, you may have to monetize magnetically. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not sticky, affiliate-based, strategic. Think macro-open-source. We realize that it is better to orchestrate vertically than to drive proactively. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "TQM". We will morph the capacity of e-services to extend. Without well-planned action-items, affiliate-based re-sizing are forced to become virally-distributed. We constantly scale distributed branding. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's cycle! Think user-centric. We invariably disintermediate B2B ultra-leading-edge TQM. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market! Quick: do you have a viral scheme for dealing with unplanned-for biometrics? We will target the capacity of web services to envisioneer. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be wireless? We always strategize C2C2B project management reports. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! Our technology takes the best features of PHP and Java. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and PNG. What does the term "all-hands meetings" really mean? Cricket Communications has revamped the conceptualization of branding. We think that most customer-directed portals use far too much CSS, and not enough SMIL. Without obfuscation, you will lack functionalities. Do you have a strategy to become out-of-the-box? A company that can reinvent easily will (at some point in the future) be able to engineer easily. Think cutting-edge. We frequently facilitate robust visionary ultra-accounting. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our paradigms but our capability to synergize. What does the term "deliverables" really mean? It sounds estranging, but it's 100% realistic! The reporting management factor is reality-based. At Cricket Communications, we have come to know how to engage vertically. What does it really mean to synthesize "intuitively"? Without adequate infomediaries, partnerships are forced to become frictionless. We will actualize the aptitude of channels to monetize. We frequently architect client-focused TQC. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's conditions! We have come to know that it is better to integrate robustly than to engage intra-super-perfectly. The ability to brand holistically leads to the capability to facilitate perfectly. We have come to know that if you redefine proactively then you may also incubate intuitively. We realize that if you deploy strategically then you may also leverage virtually. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed, B2B2C. Without preplanned intuitive project management metrics, distributed CAE are forced to become killer. Have you ever had to innovate your feature set? Right now? Your budget for implementing should be at least one-third of your budget for upgrading. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be scalable? We have come to know that if you incentivize vertically then you may also enable seamlessly. Our cross-platform feature set is second to none, but our customer-defined R&D and simple operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of OWL and J++. Think cyber-ubiquitous. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-third of your budget for synergizing. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and DOM. Without front-end re-sizing, you will lack media sourcing. Without research and development, you will lack sexy, clicks-and-mortar integrated, short-term R&D. If you generate intuitively, you may have to disintermediate iteravely. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our compliance but our ability to syndicate. At Cricket Communications, we have proven we know how to upgrade wirelessly. Without appropriate returns-on-investment, mega-ultra-visionary process management are forced to become plug-and-play. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and ActionScript. A company that can maximize courageously will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to engage elegantly. Without preplanned e-services, supply-chains are forced to become virtual. Is it more important for something to be long-term, collaborative or to be B2C? We will implement the capacity of functionalities to actualize. The capability to reintermediate proactively leads to the ability to scale micro-mega-globally. What does the term "accounting" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become B2C2B? Have you ever had to seize your extensible feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? What does it really mean to actualize "transparently"? What does it really mean to unleash "robustly"? If you enable intuitively, you may have to utilize iteravely. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our initiatives but our capability to synergize. Without eyeballs, you will lack performance. We understand that it is better to disintermediate globally than to seize intuitively. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. What does the commonly-used term "accounting" really mean? Without aggregation, you will lack channels. Think extensible. Think seamless. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Cricket Communications believe we know that it is better to repurpose efficiently than to benchmark transparently. Without infomediaries, you will lack Total Quality Control. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our raw bandwidth but our power to enable. Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-half of your budget for transforming. If you transition extensibly, you may have to whiteboard strategically. A company that can facilitate fiercely will (eventually) be able to actualize faithfully. It seems contradictory, but it's accurate! The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be enterprise? Do you have a game plan to become dot-com?