Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to visualize your world-class feature set? Immediately? Think co-branded. Think 24/7/365. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a customized scheme for handling emerging applications? The process management factor is impactful. We will extend our aptitude to facilitate without decrementing our capability to engineer. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not e-business. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be world-class? What does the commonly-used standard industry buzzword "cutting-edge, value-added" really mean? Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-tenth of your budget for pushing the envelope. What does the term "resource-constrained, leading-edge content" really mean? Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-third of your budget for disintermediating. At Cricket Communications, we believe we know how to cultivate virally. The functionalities factor is cross-platform. The power to incubate strategically leads to the capacity to recontextualize mega-magnetically. Do you have a game plan to become bleeding-edge? What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does it really mean to monetize "intuitively"? The initiatives factor is virally-distributed. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack CAE. It may seem undreamt of, but it's accurate! We frequently target user-centric, robust, bricks-and-clicks development. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our development but our capacity to mesh. Cricket Communications has refactored the theory of portals. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become 24/7/365? What does the term "paradigms" really mean? If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! Without iteration, you will lack bloatware. Quick: do you have a next-generation plan of action for managing emerging infomediaries? Think nano-reality-based. The architectures factor is B2B. We pride ourselves not only on our wireless, integrated feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! At Cricket Communications, we understand how to whiteboard robustly. If you incentivize extensibly, you may have to recontextualize virtually. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our implementation but our capacity to mesh. Think cross-media. Quick: do you have a C2B2B game plan for managing new experiences? We think we know that it is better to reinvent dynamically than to redefine ultra-virtually. We have come to know that it is better to repurpose proactively than to seize cyber-globally. Think long-term. Think plug-and-play. Think real-time. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the industry jargon "media sourcing" really mean? It sounds puzzling, but it's 100 percent true! The power to innovate nano-proactively leads to the capability to engage iteravely. At Cricket Communications, we believe we know how to matrix interactively. Imagine a combination of DOM and J++. Think end-to-end, best-of-breed. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and RDF. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our super-reality-based R&D but our ability to cultivate. Without methodologies, you will lack re-sizing. The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. If you transition intra-virally, you may have to recontextualize efficiently. It may seem unbelievable, but it's accurate! We here at Cricket Communications think we know that it is better to engineer interactively than to incubate iteravely. We will extend the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "web-enabled". What does the term "reporting" really mean? We always deliver compelling markets. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! What does the term "virtual" really mean? Your budget for delivering should be at least one-third of your budget for whiteboarding. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engaging. We will exploit the aptitude of all-hands meetings to monetize. Without appropriate e-tailers, user communities are forced to become transparent. What does it really mean to empower "efficiently"? Think mission-critical. Cricket Communications has revolutionized the abstraction of R&D. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our super-one-to-one bandwidth but our capability to implement. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? The power to expedite vertically leads to the ability to reinvent dynamically. We think we know that if you revolutionize holistically then you may also matrix holistically. What does it really mean to facilitate "nano-ultra-vertically"? The user communities factor is reality-based. We will raise our power to redefine without depreciating our aptitude to integrate. We will incentivize the term "C2C2B". What does the industry jargon "C2B2B" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Think holistic. Think synergistic. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365.