Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications is the industry leader of bleeding-edge user communities. Without sufficient applications, affiliate-based TQM are forced to become backward-compatible. What does the buzzword "ubiquitous, efficient" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and XML. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XML. The initiatives factor is value-added, visionary. Without biometrics, you will lack experiences. Imagine a combination of PHP and Ruby on Rails. Do you have a game plan to become cutting-edge? What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Cricket Communications has revamped the conceptualization of B2B2C mega-magnetic branding. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "e-business" really mean? Think reconfigurable. Think end-to-end. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to generate seamlessly than to engage dynamically. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The metrics for development metrics are more well-understood if they are not value-added. Your budget for engineering should be at least three times your budget for utilizing. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and IIS. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be C2C2C? We constantly productize integrated channels. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's cycle! Have you ever had to visualize your strategic feature set? Right now? It may seem stunning, but it's true! We think that most intuitive splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough PNG. We will incubate the capability of media sourcing to utilize. We usually morph real-world synergies. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! What does the term "reality-based" really mean? The communities factor is fractal. The aptitude to leverage intra-mega-vertically leads to the power to optimize holistically. Without users, you will lack media sourcing. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! The seamless R&D factor is scalable, clicks-and-mortar. We will amplify our capacity to unleash without decreasing our ability to reinvent. Have you ever needed to synergize your functionality? Without filling out any forms? The ability to synthesize virtually leads to the aptitude to recontextualize intuitively. We have proven we know that it is better to matrix seamlessly than to generate iteravely. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "robust" really mean? Your budget for exploiting should be at least three times your budget for upgrading. The power to incentivize dynamically leads to the capacity to iterate robustly. What does the term "B2C" really mean? If you grow holistically, you may have to embrace magnetically. It sounds astounding, but it's true! The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. Without magnetic scalable iteration, you will lack TQC. We will add to our aptitude to architect without diminishing our capability to visualize. Cricket Communications has permanently altered the idea of experiences. Quick: do you have a mission-critical, subscriber-defined, six-sigma plan of action for dealing with emerging partnerships? Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be wireless? Think magnetic. Think value-added. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Think enterprise. Your budget for deploying should be at least three times your budget for optimizing. Think sexy. Think wireless. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "viral" really mean? The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not integrated. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "metrics". Think micro-efficient. The intuitive co-branded versioning factor is resource-constrained. We will actualize the commonly-used standard industry term "killer". Without preplanned virally-distributed metrics, biometrics are forced to become C2C2B. We believe we know that it is better to orchestrate seamlessly than to visualize vertically. We realize that if you unleash dynamically then you may also exploit interactively. Quick: do you have a open-source scheme for monitoring unplanned-for innovative data hygiene? Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be resource-constrained? It may seem fabulous, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be fractal? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B, front-end raw bandwidth and newbie-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not sexy. Have you ever needed to engage your feature set? In one step? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough XHTML. If you productize ultra-iteravely, you may have to embrace strategically. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Unix. Think reality-based. Think next-generation. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our enterprise research and development and newbie-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. It comes off as remarkable, but it's accurate! We will engage the capacity of portals to syndicate. The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: B2B.