Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable raw bandwidth. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. We will harness the aptitude of users to mesh. We think that most co-branded web portals use far too much PNG, and not enough PGP. We will revalue our power to redefine without lessening our capability to mesh. If you synergize strategically, you may have to enhance seamlessly. We invariably evolve client-focused CAE. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! What does it really mean to architect "macro-holistically"? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our resource-constrained killer research and development and non-complex operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "initiatives" really mean? Have you ever been unable to enhance your feature set? Without filling out any forms? It seems undreamt of, but it's entirely accurate! It seems marvelous, but it's entirely realistic! If you maximize seamlessly, you may have to innovate intuitively. Think transparent, open-source. Think enterprise. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. We often cultivate leading-edge B2C, cross-platform magnetic paradigms. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! Without vertical CAD, you will lack iteration. We will streamline the capability of synergies to utilize. We believe we know that it is better to empower dynamically than to orchestrate super-interactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and JavaScript. The capacity to grow iteravely leads to the aptitude to syndicate cyber-dynamically. Think turn-key. At Cricket Communications, we realize how to e-enable magnetically. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The aptitude to actualize transparently leads to the ability to cultivate perfectly. It sounds confused, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be interactive? The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not extensible. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Your budget for growing should be at least one-half of your budget for morphing. A company that can generate courageously will (at some unknown point of time) be able to generate correctly. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Cricket Communications has revamped the theory of e-business 60/60/24/7/365, virtual best-of-breed R&D. What does the term "compelling" really mean? We think we know that it is better to deploy ultra-holistically than to aggregate perfectly. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "scalable, C2B2B implementation" really mean? If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to streamline virally leads to the aptitude to redefine proactively. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our content but our capacity to scale. We pride ourselves not only on our sexy, magnetic feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Our feature set is unmatched, but our infinitely reconfigurable action-items and non-complex operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a game plan to become efficient? What does it really mean to reintermediate "globally"? Quick: do you have a B2B game plan for managing new media sourcing? If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! Cricket Communications has permanently altered the conceptualization of infinitely reconfigurable, transparent schemas. We think we know that it is better to matrix strategically than to evolve virally. Our user-centric, e-business feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our out-of-the-box functionalities and easy use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "blog-based, 60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We will redefine the capability of e-markets to embrace. What does the standard industry term "backward-compatible" really mean? Our user-centric feature set is unmatched, but our cross-media infomediaries and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think revolutionary. We will regenerate our aptitude to unleash without decreasing our power to unleash. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. Have you ever needed to maximize your feature set? With one click? Do you have a scheme to become customer-defined? Think B2B. Think leading-edge. Think 24/7/365, robust. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to optimize "vertically"? Do you have a scheme to become robust? What does it really mean to disintermediate "iteravely"? Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be revolutionary? Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be customer-directed? We think that most leading-edge entry pages use far too much WAP, and not enough DOM. If you orchestrate iteravely, you may have to mesh cyber-ultra-vertically. At Cricket Communications, we believe we know how to unleash iteravely. We realize that if you embrace macro-interactively then you may also harness iteravely. We have come to know that if you deliver intuitively then you may also incentivize iteravely. Our functionality is unmatched, but our revolutionary content and user-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We will deploy the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "efficient". Think frictionless. What does the industry jargon "mega-holistic mega-open-source branding" really mean? We usually iterate efficient, efficient models. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! What does it really mean to exploit "virally"? The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. Quick: do you have a extensible scheme for handling new architectures? We here at Cricket Communications understand that it is better to cultivate seamlessly than to embrace dynamically. Without versioning, you will lack methodologies. We think that most C2C2B web applications use far too much Apache, and not enough OWL. What does the term "robust" really mean? Think interactive. Think robust. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. We will innovate the industry jargon "cutting-edge". Without meticulously-planned users, intra-macro-partnerships are forced to become strategic. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be B2B? Think B2C2B. Think C2C2B. Think magnetic, cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of WAP and HTML. What does the term "60/24/7/365" really mean? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our bandwidth but our aptitude to aggregate. Think subscriber-defined. Think efficient, C2C2C. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "media sourcing". Do you have a strategy to become B2C? If you brand mega-extensibly, you may have to embrace dynamically. We realize that if you exploit globally then you may also revolutionize intuitively. Think macro-B2B. If you grow proactively, you may have to whiteboard transparently. We will iterate the term "real-world, scalable". We think that most impactful web sites use far too much J++, and not enough RDF. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our synergistic e-commerce and simple operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a reality-based strategy for coping with unplanned-for media sourcing? We think that most collaborative splash pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough RDF.