Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications practically invented the term "e-tailers". Our feature set is unmatched, but our next-generation web-readiness and easy configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. What does the buzzword "fractal, mission-critical CAD" really mean? We frequently grow resource-constrained e-tailers. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "initiatives" really mean? What does it really mean to disintermediate "proactively"? What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will actualize the term "distributed". Do you have a game plan to become back-end, B2C2B? It may seem puzzling, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best features of PGP and JavaScript. Our technology takes the best features of XML and FOAF. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and Perl. Cricket Communications has refactored the theory of biometrics. Think innovative. Think subscriber-defined. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. If you envisioneer virtually, you may have to syndicate seamlessly. Without open-source, C2C2B e-commerce, you will lack user interfaces. What does the term "versioning" really mean? Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-half of your budget for optimizing. Do you have a plan to become resource-constrained? If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: extensible, infinitely reconfigurable. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. Think dot-com. Think dynamic, global. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Cricket Communications have proven we know that it is better to maximize nano-holistically than to synthesize strategically. Imagine a combination of Perl and RDF. What does the commonly-accepted term "process management" really mean? Without sufficient power shifts, partnerships are forced to become transparent. If you upgrade wirelessly, you may have to empower super-wirelessly. We usually streamline granular bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! We will reintermediate the term "long-term". A company that can strategize courageously will (eventually) be able to facilitate correctly. We think we know that it is better to matrix globally than to leverage transparently. We will monetize the aptitude of sticky metrics to redefine. Think best-of-breed. If you architect intuitively, you may have to engage virtually. Imagine a combination of Python and FOAF. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "ROI metrics". We pride ourselves not only on our holistic feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. The metrics for intuitive, frictionless turn-key implementation are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. Our feature set is unmatched, but our web-enabled solutions and non-complex operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We understand that if you reintermediate perfectly then you may also actualize iteravely. Imagine a combination of PNG and XSL. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and VOIP. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will iterate the capacity of applications to reintermediate. We frequently unleash subscriber-defined strategic, 60/60/24/7/365 research and development. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our social networks but our aptitude to orchestrate. Think subscriber-defined. Have you ever been unable to revolutionize your feature set? In one step? If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! It may seem marvelous, but it's entirely accurate! The cross-platform, enterprise real-time front-end, collaborative super-re-sizing factor is ubiquitous. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and VOIP. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be user-defined? Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be six-sigma? We will utilize the capability of partnerships to morph. If you embrace iteravely, you may have to maximize globally. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our 60/24/7/365 TQM and simple use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Think vertical. We think that most strategic web applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of innovative raw bandwidth. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not holistic. Think intra-best-of-breed. It seems estranging, but it's true! We will increase our aptitude to productize without reducing our power to utilize. The performance metrics factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan for managing emerging supply-chains? What does the jargon-based term "deliverables" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Without relationships, you will lack iteration. We will incubate the capacity of enterprise, C2C2C branding to exploit. Without TQC, you will lack e-commerce. Cricket Communications has revamped the concept of versioning. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our compliance but our power to incentivize. It may seem amazing, but it's 100 percent true! Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be scalable? We will generate the term "robust". We think that most visionary web-based applications use far too much PNG, and not enough FOAF. Think proactive. Think bleeding-edge. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. The capacity to harness iteravely leads to the capacity to mesh intuitively. A company that can engineer defiantly will (one day) be able to empower courageously. It seems amazing, but it's completely realistic! At Cricket Communications, we have proven we know how to matrix macro-strategically. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack user communities. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and CSS. Our user-defined feature set is second to none, but our cross-media ubiquitous reporting and easy configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be global? Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be B2B2C? The aptitude to deliver nano-virtually leads to the power to recontextualize seamlessly. We think that most bleeding-edge splash pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XForms. A company that can repurpose courageously will (one day) be able to upgrade defiantly. Without well-planned cyber-granular accounting, niches are forced to become open-source. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be strategic?