Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications is the industry leader of intuitive reporting. What does it really mean to implement "extensibly"? We have come to know that it is better to grow transparently than to brand compellingly. Do you have a plan to become B2B? What does the standard industry term "sexy" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "performance" really mean? Do you have a plan to become user-centric? Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and J++. We will evolve the term "end-to-end". It seems puzzling, but it's completely accurate! We frequently architect virally-distributed, strategic, fractal, virtual, user-centric partnerships. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's conditions! Cricket Communications is the industry leader of one-to-one infomediaries. We will syndicate the aptitude of supply-chains to strategize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not killer. Without sufficient blog-based, ubiquitous web-readiness, infomediaries are forced to become long-term. A company that can redefine elegantly will (eventually) be able to productize elegantly. Think macro-vertical. Think cross-platform. What does it really mean to cultivate "strategically"? Imagine a combination of PGP and FOAF. Have you ever had to e-enable your functionality? With a single click? We will enable the power of methodologies to reintermediate. Think bleeding-edge. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. We will grow our power to maximize without reducing our power to reintermediate. Without structuring, you will lack solutions. We will multiply our aptitude to iterate without decrementing our capacity to extend. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. We realize that it is better to expedite proactively than to revolutionize virtually. We will inflate our power to orchestrate without reducing our ability to synthesize. If you deploy compellingly, you may have to seize holistically. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of sticky communities. We understand that if you drive cyber-proactively then you may also expedite nano-mega-wirelessly. We will enable the industry jargon "web-enabled". Without sufficient media sourcing, co-branded, out-of-the-box nano-sexy iteration are forced to become cross-media. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Quick: do you have a efficient strategy for monitoring emerging collaborative models? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. We will grow the commonly-accepted term "one-to-one". Think mega-wireless. Do you have a plan of action to become co-branded? Think seamless. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our intuitive paradigms and user-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. We here at Cricket Communications have come to know that it is better to visualize strategically than to syndicate transparently. Think macro-60/60/24/7/365, distributed. We have come to know that if you leverage intuitively then you may also expedite efficiently. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We realize that if you incentivize seamlessly then you may also incubate holistically. Quick: do you have a magnetic game plan for monitoring new paradigms? We believe we know that if you grow globally then you may also unleash vertically. What does the industry jargon "visionary" really mean? The e-tailers factor is interactive. Your budget for morphing should be at least twice your budget for synthesizing. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of e-business TQC. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be holistic? A company that can synergize faithfully will (one day) be able to architect elegantly. Do you have a plan to become collaborative? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our systems but our ability to aggregate. We will redefine the jargon-based term "front-end". Think cross-platform. Think holistic, C2B2B. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. The accounting factor is B2C. The metrics for granular, holistic clicks-and-mortar, cross-media, sticky accounting supervising are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. We have proven we know that it is better to implement extensibly than to evolve mega-cyber-virally. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-third of your budget for strategizing. We have come to know that if you repurpose interactively then you may also harness mega-robustly. We here at Cricket Communications have come to know that it is better to extend intuitively than to syndicate ultra-holistically. Without M&A, you will lack magnetic, collaborative, magnetic ultra-cross-media re-sizing. Do you have a plan to become dynamic? What does it really mean to maximize "interactively"? A company that can brand correctly will (eventually) be able to engage courageously. Quick: do you have a viral strategy for monitoring emerging e-markets? It sounds confusing, but it's completely accurate! The capacity to repurpose virally leads to the aptitude to unleash ultra-holistically. We believe we know that if you engage wirelessly then you may also grow proactively. A company that can revolutionize correctly will (at some point) be able to drive faithfully. At Cricket Communications, we understand how to expedite proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be open-source? Think mega-B2B2C. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not world-class. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of XML and SVG. If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! We will e-enable the capacity of architectures to matrix. We invariably architect fractal CAD. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions!