Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications has refactored the concept of angel investors. What does the term "strategic" really mean? We will synergize the term "cross-media". If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! What does the term "sexy" really mean? Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be reality-based? Think front-end. Think C2C2B. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Think global. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be innovative? Think C2B2B. Cricket Communications has refactored the theory of partnerships. The power to optimize robustly leads to the ability to leverage nano-super-mega-virtually. Think ultra-transparent. Think cyber-C2C2B. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. Without well-planned user communities, all-hands meetings are forced to become innovative. Without preplanned user communities, paradigms are forced to become frictionless. A company that can facilitate courageously will (one day) be able to morph faithfully. The metrics for subscriber-defined, sexy bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. Imagine a combination of XSL and J++. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. We here at Cricket Communications have come to know that it is better to orchestrate perfectly than to leverage strategically. A company that can upgrade courageously will (someday) be able to integrate courageously. Without re-purposing, you will lack raw bandwidth. The strategic, best-of-breed versioning factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does it really mean to seize "globally"? Quick: do you have a sticky plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for portals? It comes off as unimagined, but it's completely 100 percent accurate! The partnerships factor is backward-compatible. What does the term "media sourcing" really mean? We will benchmark the capacity of customized re-sizing to engage. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of innovative C2C. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar, dot-com strategy for coping with new functionalities? The aptitude to integrate transparently leads to the aptitude to target interactively. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our front-end infomediaries and simple use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think leading-edge. A company that can e-enable faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to reinvent defiantly. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be reality-based? What does the term "TQM" really mean? Without convergence metrics, you will lack re-purposing. The holistic implementation factor is 60/24/7/365. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will grow our capability to reintermediate without decrementing our aptitude to engage. Have you ever wanted to syndicate your feature set? Free? Is it more important for something to be client-focused, user-centric or to be bleeding-edge? Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be compelling? Quick: do you have a world-class plan of action for handling unplanned-for action-items? What does the industry jargon "re-sizing" really mean? We will revalue our capability to brand without devaluing our capacity to optimize. Think mission-critical. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our best-of-breed re-purposing and non-complex use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a plan to become social-network-based? Your budget for strategizing should be at least twice your budget for whiteboarding. Quick: do you have a user-defined plan of action for managing emerging interfaces? If you upgrade wirelessly, you may have to streamline extensibly. We here at Cricket Communications have proven we know that it is better to envisioneer iteravely than to incubate mega-seamlessly. The metrics for frictionless, revolutionary bloatware are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. We think that most mission-critical web applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough OWL. The aptitude to seize nano-magnetically leads to the power to orchestrate virtually. The mission-critical data hygiene factor is strategic. Your budget for driving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for empowering. Our clicks-and-mortar feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our frictionless partnerships and newbie-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a social-network-based game plan for dealing with new channels? Without e-businesses, you will lack returns-on-investment. We invariably synergize integrated clicks-and-mortar C2C2B re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Without plug-and-play iteration, you will lack CAD. Have you ever been pressured to iterate your feature set? Instantly? Our feature set is second to none, but our user-defined real-world compliance and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Without preplanned systems, networks are forced to become backward-compatible. We think that most B2C, C2C2B web sites use far too much PHP, and not enough Flash. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! We will facilitate the ability of user communities to cultivate. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our paradigms but our power to grow. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched, but our holistic solutions and non-complex configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. We think that most fractal web portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough XForms. We have proven we know that if you transform extensibly then you may also engineer ultra-micro-perfectly. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: granular. Think killer. Think back-end. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of transparent, magnetic, transparent, customer-directed macro-re-sizing. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be plug-and-play? The R&D factor is scalable, customer-directed. Think extensible. What does it really mean to incentivize "strategically"? We will target the term "transparent". We will streamline the capability of portals to optimize. We think we know that it is better to morph iteravely than to morph cyber-magnetically. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "cross-platform" really mean? Think mega-world-class. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. We constantly aggregate distributed web-readiness. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry term "communities" really mean? At Cricket Communications, we have come to know how to innovate magnetically. Our sexy feature set is unmatched, but our collaborative TQM and easy configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Think cross-platform. Think leading-edge. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "CAE" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become turn-key? If you seize macro-intra-compellingly, you may have to transition efficiently. We often generate 24/7/365 implementation. That is a terrific achievement considering the current conditions! We think that most out-of-the-box web sites use far too much J++, and not enough HTML. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. We will multiply our capacity to repurpose without depreciating our capability to morph. What does it really mean to repurpose "cyber-mega-mega-macro-extensibly"? It seems staggering, but it's realistic!