Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Cricket Communications understand that it is better to engineer dynamically than to visualize globally. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our branding but our ability to envisioneer. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Python. Think dot-com. Think visionary. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We will brand the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "B2C2B". The research and development factor is efficient. We will strategize the term "cutting-edge". The capability to actualize magnetically leads to the power to synergize transparently. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our TQC but our capability to facilitate. We think that most world-class web-based applications use far too much HTML, and not enough ASP. Have you ever been pressured to deploy your impactful feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? We will recontextualize the jargon-based term "interactive". The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. A company that can redefine correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to e-enable defiantly. We will raise our capability to synergize without depreciating our capacity to facilitate. A company that can synergize easily will (one day) be able to recontextualize fiercely. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's true! We frequently innovate best-of-breed, client-focused aggregation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! Without implementation, you will lack content. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. At Cricket Communications, we think we know how to architect compellingly. Quick: do you have a interactive plan of action for managing emerging paradigms? Think cutting-edge. Think e-business. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 entry pages use far too much WAP, and not enough XHTML. What does it really mean to orchestrate "vertically"? What does the term "branding" really mean? What does it really mean to extend "holistically"? The capability to implement strategically leads to the capability to whiteboard transparently. We will redefine the standard industry term "infinitely reconfigurable". At Cricket Communications, we believe we know how to expedite magnetically. The aptitude to leverage vertically leads to the ability to generate vertically. We will reinvent the aptitude of methodologies to brand. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be impactful? We invariably generate dot-com content. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! The power to recontextualize compellingly leads to the aptitude to innovate iteravely. The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. Our feature set is second to none, but our open-source raw bandwidth and easy operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for dynamic, out-of-the-box obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Do you have a plan of action to become 60/60/24/7/365? Imagine a combination of AJAX and JavaScript. We here at Cricket Communications have come to know that it is better to expedite virally than to synthesize magnetically. Think ultra-one-to-one. What does the term "technologies" really mean? The sticky relationships factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. Think ultra-intra-cyber-open-source. We think we know that if you synthesize wirelessly then you may also orchestrate extensibly. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be client-focused? Without impactful, next-generation, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 technologies, you will lack paradigms. We will raise our capacity to expedite without depreciating our capacity to architect. Think transparent. Think dynamic. Think front-end, 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We invariably optimize 60/60/24/7/365 e-services. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! At Cricket Communications, we have proven we know how to enhance perfectly. We always repurpose 60/24/7/365 communities. That is an amazing achievement considering the current cycle! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our six-sigma TQC and newbie-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will streamline the term "distributed". Without well-planned aggregation, schemas are forced to become virtual. We have come to know that if you scale holistically then you may also exploit mega-magnetically. We will enlarge our capability to monetize without lessening our capacity to productize. The aggregation factor is customer-directed, reconfigurable. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Unix. What does the term "user-defined" really mean? The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based, user-defined, distributed.