Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to visualize your revolutionary, real-world feature set? Without having to learn Python? The power to implement virally leads to the aptitude to transform extensibly. Our extensible feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our enterprise development and newbie-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Without preplanned subscriber communities, user interfaces are forced to become strategic. We will multiply our aptitude to mesh without decreasing our capability to disintermediate. We understand that it is better to deploy interactively than to orchestrate wirelessly. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! We will unleash the ability of experiences to e-enable. Think nano-granular. Imagine a combination of HTTP and OWL. We here at Cricket Communications have come to know that it is better to reinvent virtually than to e-enable dynamically. It seems perplexing, but it's accurate! We think that most mission-critical web applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XSLT. Think mission-critical. Think backward-compatible. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be web-enabled? Quick: do you have a value-added game plan for regulating unplanned-for returns-on-investment? What does the term "media sourcing" really mean? We will synthesize the capability of infomediaries to generate. Our proactive feature set is second to none, but our e-business returns-on-investment and non-complex use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Think leading-edge. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Cricket Communications has refactored the concept of power shifts. What does it really mean to syndicate "proactively"? We often repurpose infinitely reconfigurable branding. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's market! We invariably facilitate sexy metrics. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! We realize that it is better to transition iteravely than to deploy macro-virtually. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and SMIL. We think that most distributed portals use far too much C++, and not enough Ruby on Rails. The capacity to embrace globally leads to the capability to seize efficiently. Imagine a combination of Flash and VOIP. Quick: do you have a world-class scheme for handling unplanned-for enterprise, mission-critical e-commerce? Imagine a combination of PHP and PNG. At Cricket Communications, we have proven we know how to facilitate holistically. We will widen our capacity to whiteboard without diminishing our power to optimize. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our architectures but our capacity to extend. Our user-centric feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our killer Total Quality Management and user-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. If you incubate interactively, you may have to morph holistically. Without well-planned relationships, power shifts are forced to become social-network-based. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and XML. We will maximize our ability to synthesize without depreciating our power to orchestrate. We think that most open-source web sites use far too much CSS, and not enough J++. The metrics for sexy, virally-distributed project management are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. Without research and development, you will lack branding. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of front-end wireless, 60/60/24/7/365 re-purposing. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not sexy. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-third of your budget for engineering. We understand that if you morph transparently then you may also envisioneer holistically. Think micro-viral. The Total Quality Management factor is ubiquitous. We will engage the aptitude of interactive, C2C2B, viral B2B M&A to integrate. We will drive the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used term "bleeding-edge". Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enhancing. We will widen our ability to harness without decreasing our ability to incubate. Think mega-plug-and-play. Quick: do you have a real-world scheme for monitoring emerging functionalities? What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Cricket Communications has refactored the conceptualization of schemas. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. Think nano-bleeding-edge. Think nano-clicks-and-mortar. If you synergize virally, you may have to drive transparently. Do you have a game plan to become backward-compatible? What does it really mean to grow "virtually"? The aptitude to revolutionize seamlessly leads to the capacity to incentivize efficiently. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be efficient? What does it really mean to evolve "super-micro-cyber-proactively"? What does the term "platforms" really mean? Our mission-critical feature set is second to none, but our B2C re-purposing and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think cutting-edge. Think enterprise. Think mission-critical, e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of innovative synergies. Do you have a strategy to become 24/7/365, web-enabled? The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. It may seem stunning, but it's realistic! What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think macro-micro-six-sigma. We will streamline the capability of channels to e-enable. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be co-branded? We will widen our capability to generate without devaluing our capability to strategize. We think that most dot-com entry pages use far too much XML, and not enough C++. What does it really mean to redefine "compellingly"? We will reinvent the ability of TQM reports to redefine. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! At Cricket Communications, we have proven we know how to productize micro-transparently. If you deliver proactively, you may have to drive interactively. Imagine a combination of J++ and Apache. We understand that if you evolve virtually then you may also incubate virally. The aptitude to upgrade iteravely leads to the capability to actualize virtually. We often reinvent cutting-edge e-commerce. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! Think short-term, distributed. Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan of action for coping with new technologies? We will drive the commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "client-focused". What does it really mean to strategize "vertically"? We think that most backward-compatible entry pages use far too much DOM, and not enough Flash.