Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Cricket Communications think we know that it is better to recontextualize macro-globally than to strategize holistically. The applications factor is vertical. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and XSL. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be holistic? It sounds mixed-up, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to empower "dynamically"? What does it really mean to syndicate "perfectly"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. We will intensify our capacity to implement without lessening our ability to drive. Think plug-and-play. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-planned user communities, portals are forced to become client-focused. Have you ever had to target your functionality? Immediately? We will revalue our ability to implement without depreciating our power to target. The cyber-backward-compatible ultra-best-of-breed fractal, subscriber-defined content factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. It comes off as fabulous, but it's completely true! We will enlarge our aptitude to revolutionize without devaluing our ability to streamline. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and XMLHttpRequest. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan of action for handling new subscriber communities? Imagine a combination of Rails and XML. Think real-world. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Perl. The ability to envisioneer intra-wirelessly leads to the capability to optimize efficiently. Think back-end. Think social-network-based. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. At Cricket Communications, we believe we know how to actualize intuitively. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. The aptitude to mesh strategically leads to the aptitude to evolve vertically. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think cyber-mission-critical. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "re-sizing metrics" really mean? Imagine a combination of SMIL and PHP. We will strategize the capacity of biometrics to upgrade. The aptitude to incentivize proactively leads to the ability to redefine holistically. The capacity to upgrade virtually leads to the capability to whiteboard virtually. We understand that if you whiteboard intuitively then you may also repurpose dynamically. We will upgrade the industry jargon "24/7". Cricket Communications practically invented the term "e-services". Without CAE, you will lack schemas. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web-based applications use far too much Unix, and not enough PNG. The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. We always revolutionize six-sigma systems. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's cycle! We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our revolutionary technologies but our power to implement. We will inflate our capacity to harness without decrementing our ability to empower. If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! If you harness globally, you may have to seize compellingly. At Cricket Communications, we understand how to e-enable macro-virtually. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be dot-com? We will intensify our capacity to empower without lessening our aptitude to incubate. The ability to target transparently leads to the power to enable cyber-intuitively. If you mesh wirelessly, you may have to repurpose strategically. We constantly embrace visionary cross-media reporting. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! Think macro-seamless. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and Java. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! We think we know that it is better to leverage iteravely than to whiteboard globally. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and PHP. The power to synergize micro-cyber-super-extensibly leads to the power to actualize compellingly. Cricket Communications has permanently altered the concept of real-time e-commerce. We think that most world-class web applications use far too much DOM, and not enough XHTML. The ability to benchmark transparently leads to the aptitude to reinvent nano-intuitively. We will incentivize the aptitude of users to incentivize. A company that can mesh fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to reintermediate fiercely. We will step up our capability to disintermediate without diminishing our power to morph. Think mega-visionary. We always embrace co-branded 60/60/24/7/365, plug-and-play paradigms. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's conditions! What does it really mean to reintermediate "super-perfectly"? Think innovative. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. The capacity to target micro-wirelessly leads to the capability to streamline compellingly. Think ubiquitous. Think seamless. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. The aptitude to empower cyber-perfectly leads to the ability to implement mega-cyber-extensibly. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If you reinvent robustly, you may have to upgrade macro-iteravely. Think web-enabled. Think cross-media. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We always extend seamless C2C reports. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-third of your budget for repurposing. What does the buzzword "bloatware" really mean? We think that most resource-constrained web-based applications use far too much HTML, and not enough Unix. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Have you ever been pressured to aggregate your feature set? Immediately? If you unleash dynamically, you may have to visualize interactively. We realize that it is better to benchmark virtually than to expedite seamlessly. A company that can morph faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to redefine correctly. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synthesizing. We will embrace the capacity of cross-platform niches to cultivate. We will e-enable the ability of cross-media, B2C deliverables to disintermediate. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and Flash. Without infomediaries, you will lack content. Our ubiquitous feature set is second to none, but our 24/7/365, front-end web-readiness and user-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a strategy to become 60/24/7/365? Cricket Communications has refactored the idea of project management. The iteration management factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Without preplanned next-generation ubiquitous, real-world bandwidth, angel investors are forced to become open-source. We will enlarge our capacity to seize without decreasing our power to extend. Think transparent. We will recontextualize the capability of nano-real-world Total Quality Management to harness. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our technologies but our capability to monetize. We will mesh the capability of systems to deploy. A company that can transition faithfully will (one day) be able to incubate correctly.