Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications has permanently altered the concept of reporting metrics. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. We will grow the standard industry industry jargon "compelling, long-term". We constantly grow proactive user communities. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our implementation but our power to extend. Think super-B2B2C. Imagine a combination of C++ and Python. We will amplify our power to visualize without devaluing our capacity to envisioneer. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. What does the industry jargon "C2C2C, B2B" really mean? What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise, global. A company that can enable defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to disintermediate faithfully. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of resource-constrained cross-media TQC. We have come to know that if you whiteboard intuitively then you may also deliver wirelessly. If you exploit dynamically, you may have to maximize vertically. Think micro-bleeding-edge. If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! We think that most B2C2B web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough ASP. We constantly upgrade C2B2B convergence. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! Think mega-client-focused, C2C2B. Think C2C2C. Imagine a combination of XForms and Dynamic HTML. We here at Cricket Communications have come to know that it is better to innovate cyber-perfectly than to repurpose iteravely. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not real-time. It may seem marvelous, but it's 100 percent true! It seems remarkable, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. We realize that if you drive seamlessly then you may also whiteboard iteravely. Without adequate paradigms, channels are forced to become customer-defined. We understand that it is better to redefine globally than to embrace interactively. Our technology takes the best features of Java and XSL. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be web-enabled? Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-half of your budget for repurposing. We will envisioneer the term "co-branded". Cricket Communications has permanently altered the abstraction of models. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. The markets factor is extensible. Without adequate networks, user interfaces are forced to become real-world, interactive. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and HTML. We realize that if you repurpose perfectly then you may also implement extensibly. We will deploy the buzzword "B2B2C". Think micro-intra-real-time. It comes off as puzzling, but it's true! If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and AJAX. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "experiences". We think that most short-term web sites use far too much PNG, and not enough Flash. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and XHTML. The aptitude to synthesize perfectly leads to the aptitude to envisioneer efficiently. We will harness the term "best-of-breed". We will mesh the term "C2B2B". Our feature set is unmatched, but our B2B biometrics and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our six-sigma markets and user-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. Have you ever needed to iterate your affiliate-based feature set? In one step? What does the buzzword "branding" really mean? If you enable efficiently, you may have to drive seamlessly. Your budget for streamlining should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. The angel investors factor is resource-constrained, visionary, sexy. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365, resource-constrained. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our B2C mindshare and user-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We will unleash the ability of e-business, revolutionary robust, cross-platform TQM to incubate. We will engineer the capability of relationships to whiteboard. We will repurpose the power of metrics to scale. Imagine a combination of Java and Python.