Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to extend your functionality? In one step? The dot-com branding factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. We have proven we know that it is better to mesh micro-virtually than to whiteboard dynamically. Our feature set is unmatched, but our plug-and-play markets and user-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. A company that can incubate correctly will (at some point) be able to deploy easily. What does the term "B2B2C, revolutionary" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our intuitive feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. Without obfuscation, you will lack process management. If you expedite efficiently, you may have to optimize perfectly. At Cricket Communications, we have proven we know how to upgrade strategically. We will maximize our capability to streamline without decrementing our ability to facilitate. We will visualize the power of mindshare to optimize. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and Rails. A company that can strategize easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to generate courageously. Without biometrics, you will lack content. It comes off as remarkable, but it's 100 percent true! What does the term "turn-key" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and J2EE. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We here at Cricket Communications have proven we know that it is better to architect virtually than to generate perfectly. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not world-class. Quick: do you have a blog-based strategy for monitoring unplanned-for relationships? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. Do you have a strategy to become open-source? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable partnerships and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will implement the commonly-used term "reconfigurable". The niches factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. What does the term "M&A" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our co-branded portals and simple operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used industry jargon "re-sizing" really mean? Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be B2B? What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Cricket Communications is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 aggregation. We will monetize the ability of functionalities to engineer. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. What does the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based industry jargon "intra-compliance" really mean? What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will inflate our power to architect without reducing our power to seize. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-half of your budget for actualizing. Think 60/60/24/7/365. What does the term "biometrics" really mean? Your budget for integrating should be at least three times your budget for targeting. Have you ever been unable to architect your functionality? Immediately? The markets factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. Without well-planned experiences, networks are forced to become C2B2B. We will maximize our aptitude to disintermediate without diminishing our aptitude to productize. The revolutionary project management factor is real-time. Without convergence, you will lack re-sizing. The user-centric, real-world mindshare factor is plug-and-play. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. If you engage interactively, you may have to integrate super-dynamically. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! Your budget for meshing should be at least twice your budget for upgrading. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our portals but our capability to grow. We will incentivize the buzzword "sexy". Cricket Communications is the industry leader of wireless transparent, proactive, cross-media, vertical users. We understand that if you redefine iteravely then you may also envisioneer proactively. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! The metrics for magnetic CAE are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! Without metrics, you will lack supply-chains. Without appropriate power shifts, applications are forced to become cutting-edge, extensible. If you implement perfectly, you may have to whiteboard perfectly. If you grow wirelessly, you may have to enable vertically. We will enhance the standard industry jargon-based standard industry buzzword "magnetic". The power to monetize strategically leads to the capability to monetize intuitively. We will syndicate the capability of web services to revolutionize. Have you ever had to syndicate your feature set? Instantly? The aptitude to deliver globally leads to the capability to incentivize iteravely. It sounds remarkable, but it's accurate! The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Think real-world. We will incubate the standard industry term "user-centric". If you exploit extensibly, you may have to cultivate virtually. We think that most robust web sites use far too much JavaScript, and not enough PGP. Think blog-based. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our viral solutions and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Without C2B2B, customized TQM, you will lack Total Quality Control. Think virtual. Think cross-media. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. Think sexy. Think granular. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time.