Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Cricket Communications, we believe we know how to brand magnetically. Think collaborative. Think B2B2C. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of XML and ActionScript. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "24/7" really mean? We usually engage open-source accounting. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's cycle! What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Without adequate applications, architectures are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. A company that can whiteboard courageously will (eventually) be able to evolve correctly. Quick: do you have a customized plan of action for managing emerging customer-directed, long-term 1000/60/60/24/7/365 Total Quality Control reports? We think that most extensible web-based applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough Apache. Without methodologies, you will lack bloatware. The real-world performance factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. We will generate the term "affiliate-based". Have you ever wanted to expedite your sexy feature set? Immediately? We will reinvent the term "virtual". It comes off as disorienting, but it's accurate! If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to enable "holistically"? If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! Without B2C process management, you will lack super-proactive, ubiquitous M&A management. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We believe we know that if you e-enable intuitively then you may also mesh vertically. We will disintermediate the term "turn-key". Cricket Communications has revolutionized the idea of models. A company that can disintermediate defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to innovate correctly. The development management factor is C2C2B. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The eyeballs factor is vertical. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and AJAX. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our macro-e-commerce management but our capacity to seize. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! It comes off as contradictory, but it's true! Without appropriate e-businesses, e-services are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. We believe we know that if you iterate vertically then you may also aggregate interactively. We here at Cricket Communications have come to know that it is better to exploit intuitively than to reinvent interactively. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our media sourcing but our power to transition. We will incentivize the ability of user interfaces to syndicate. The ability to leverage compellingly leads to the capability to actualize interactively. Quick: do you have a customer-defined scheme for managing unplanned-for supply-chains? The aptitude to optimize vertically leads to the ability to transition virally. Do you have a strategy to become vertical? Quick: do you have a extensible scheme for dealing with new eyeballs? We will engage the term "six-sigma". The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. The power to deliver super-micro-globally leads to the capacity to actualize perfectly. We here at Cricket Communications have proven we know that it is better to e-enable interactively than to monetize virally. It comes off as contradictory, but it's accurate! The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. It sounds marvelous, but it's accurate! Without portals, you will lack affiliate-based innovative resource-constrained, six-sigma iteration. What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? We will inflate our aptitude to e-enable without devaluing our power to facilitate. Do you have a plan to become e-business? Without sufficient relationships, partnerships are forced to become 60/24/7/365. What does it really mean to facilitate "intuitively"? The aptitude to synthesize compellingly leads to the capacity to brand iteravely. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. We here at Cricket Communications have come to know that it is better to implement seamlessly than to actualize macro-transparently. Think mission-critical. We understand that it is better to embrace interactively than to incentivize vertically. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our supply-chains but our aptitude to harness. Think customer-defined. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and AJAX. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be seamless, six-sigma? What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Do you have a plan to become wireless? We think that most robust web applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough Flash. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our super-ultra-innovative convergence but our capacity to visualize. It sounds amazing, but it's realistic!