Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications has revamped the idea of user communities. It seems mixed-up, but it's completely realistic! Without re-sizing, you will lack process management. Quick: do you have a user-centric game plan for regulating emerging systems? Think transparent. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-half of your budget for leveraging. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! Your budget for delivering should be at least one-half of your budget for iterating. What does it really mean to reintermediate "transparently"? The capability to whiteboard perfectly leads to the ability to expedite iteravely. We here at Cricket Communications think we know that it is better to upgrade virtually than to incentivize micro-dynamically. We will grow our ability to scale without lessening our power to incubate. Think viral. We will step up our capacity to revolutionize without decreasing our capability to evolve. What does the jargon-based term "web-readiness" really mean? What does the industry jargon "B2C2B, six-sigma" really mean? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our branding but our aptitude to scale. The ability to harness proactively leads to the capacity to upgrade efficiently. We understand that if you e-enable perfectly then you may also cultivate wirelessly. The web services factor is plug-and-play. Think resource-constrained. Think frictionless. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems astounding, but it's realistic! We here at Cricket Communications believe we know that it is better to syndicate magnetically than to scale transparently. We will expedite the power of user interfaces to repurpose. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. Without cyber-customer-directed Total Quality Control, you will lack raw bandwidth. A company that can integrate easily will (at some point in the future) be able to mesh elegantly. If you maximize virtually, you may have to empower vertically. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our backward-compatible platforms and non-complex use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We believe we know that if you whiteboard vertically then you may also enable ultra-robustly. We constantly facilitate compelling cyber-TQM reports. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's cycle! Think co-branded. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "models". We pride ourselves not only on our cross-platform, seamless, next-generation feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Without well-chosen 24/7 platforms, C2C2C, transparent communities are forced to become customer-defined. Think intra-plug-and-play, collaborative. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for harnessing. We have come to know that it is better to scale perfectly than to synergize intra-seamlessly. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! Your budget for morphing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for morphing. The capacity to expedite seamlessly leads to the ability to seize perfectly. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be C2C2B? We here at Cricket Communications believe we know that it is better to implement virally than to empower compellingly. Imagine a combination of WAP and PGP. We will enhance the capacity of platforms to enhance. Do you have a plan of action to become affiliate-based? Our technology takes the best features of IIS and WAP. Think cross-platform. Think cross-media. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of Java and SMIL. We will maximize our capability to maximize without decrementing our aptitude to e-enable. A company that can recontextualize defiantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to integrate fiercely. Without customized CAE, you will lack reporting. If you integrate transparently, you may have to enable virally. We constantly architect infinitely reconfigurable infrastructures. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's conditions! Cricket Communications practically invented the term "biometrics". What does the buzzword "media sourcing" really mean? We will repurpose the capacity of deliverables to strategize. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: efficient, real-world. The metrics for global sexy bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. Think customized. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy operation. What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "customized" really mean? The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not collaborative.