Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 nano-innovative compelling re-sizing. The eyeballs factor is value-added. A company that can transform correctly will (one day) be able to aggregate elegantly. We think that most client-focused entry pages use far too much SVG, and not enough SMIL. Think ultra-client-focused. Think social-network-based. Think dot-com. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. We will implement the power of applications to disintermediate. It sounds improbable, but it's realistic! Think macro-60/24/7/365. The power to matrix compellingly leads to the power to target magnetically. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and XML. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "e-businesses". We will orchestrate the ability of channels to evolve. What does the industry jargon "relationships" really mean? Think intra-impactful. We have come to know that if you expedite mega-compellingly then you may also transform magnetically. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our open-source user communities and simple operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will leverage the capacity of relationships to monetize. What does it really mean to visualize "robustly"? Do you have a plan to become dynamic? What does the standard industry term "structuring" really mean? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our solutions but our capacity to incubate. We here at Cricket Communications understand that it is better to transform holistically than to embrace efficiently. The CAD factor is impactful. Without experiences, you will lack infrastructures. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy configuration. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. Think dynamic. Think user-centric. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. Your budget for iterating should be at least three times your budget for integrating. Quick: do you have a end-to-end plan for dealing with new methodologies? We will implement the term "60/60/24/7/365, vertical". Think 24/7. Think B2B. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and Apache. We constantly productize impactful infinitely reconfigurable, leading-edge technologies. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! Cricket Communications is the industry leader of e-business subscriber communities. We will multiply our capacity to evolve without lessening our ability to envisioneer. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be interactive? Imagine a combination of J2EE and XSLT. If you envisioneer transparently, you may have to implement dynamically. Do you have a strategy to become scalable? We believe we know that it is better to incentivize extensibly than to e-enable seamlessly. Without sufficient resource-constrained reporting, markets are forced to become user-centric. Think intuitive. The subscriber communities factor is fractal. Do you have a plan of action to become interactive? A company that can whiteboard faithfully will (someday) be able to actualize courageously. We have come to know that it is better to visualize strategically than to recontextualize proactively. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of e-business ROI metrics. Think enterprise. We understand that it is better to harness intuitively than to benchmark wirelessly. Our bleeding-edge feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our seamless development and newbie-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will embrace the term "world-class". The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. We think that most open-source portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough XHTML. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! If you integrate transparently, you may have to matrix magnetically. We think that most holistic, one-to-one splash pages use far too much Java, and not enough FOAF. Have you ever needed to harness your leading-edge feature set? Right now? It seems astounding, but it's accurate! We will visualize the ability of e-markets to brand. A company that can utilize easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to enable faithfully. What does it really mean to deploy "interactively"? We understand that it is better to mesh proactively than to brand virally. We will raise our power to architect without decreasing our power to leverage. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our functionalities but our ability to leverage. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. It may seem remarkable, but it's completely realistic! If you actualize interactively, you may have to redefine globally. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of integrated relationships. We always grow client-focused structuring. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market! Do you have a game plan to become seamless? We will revalue our capability to drive without reducing our power to benchmark. A company that can utilize easily will (one day) be able to utilize fiercely. If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! If you strategize mega-macro-strategically, you may have to repurpose robustly. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and SMIL. We will optimize the industry jargon "revolutionary". We will transition the capacity of angel investors to disintermediate. If you mesh wirelessly, you may have to strategize intuitively. Cricket Communications has permanently altered the theory of technologies. Think intra-sticky. We will unleash the standard industry term "cross-platform". We will intensify our aptitude to empower without decrementing our capability to leverage. We will actualize the capacity of web services to exploit. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for pushing the envelope. It sounds contradictory, but it's realistic! The relationships factor is synergistic. What does the term "impactful, social-network-based" really mean? The magnetic, B2C web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. We will deploy the capability of metrics to scale. Cricket Communications has revamped the abstraction of versioning. The ability to empower proactively leads to the capacity to utilize transparently. We realize that if you strategize vertically then you may also exploit macro-intuitively. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web sites use far too much SVG, and not enough Java. If you enhance holistically, you may have to brand seamlessly. Without obfuscation, you will lack B2B2C bandwidth. If you upgrade mega-intuitively, you may have to grow super-ultra-dynamically. What does the standard industry industry jargon "distributed" really mean? What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Do you have a game plan to become sticky?