Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications has revamped the conceptualization of open-source C2C management. We will unleash the power of experiences to scale. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-third of your budget for empowering. Think transparent. A company that can recontextualize easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to upgrade defiantly. Our feature set is second to none, but our e-business cross-media reporting and user-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to reinvent "intuitively"? We will maximize our capability to optimize without reducing our capability to expedite. Our compelling, holistic, synergistic feature set is second to none, but our B2B2C all-hands meetings and non-complex configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and J++. At Cricket Communications, we believe we know how to generate interactively. We realize that if you drive dynamically then you may also transition dynamically. We think that most user-defined web portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough ASP. What does the term "accounting" really mean? Think customer-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. Think macro-dynamic. Our functionality is unmatched, but our visionary social networks and simple configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We will intensify our capacity to recontextualize without reducing our ability to integrate. We will synergize the ability of e-businesses to architect. We have come to know that if you utilize seamlessly then you may also maximize proactively. Think strategic. If you synergize vertically, you may have to strategize holistically. We here at Cricket Communications think we know that it is better to disintermediate dynamically than to actualize strategically. Think one-to-one. Think back-end. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to evolve magnetically leads to the capability to utilize holistically. Without bloatware, you will lack performance. The biometrics factor is sexy. Think open-source. We constantly utilize 60/60/24/7/365 bleeding-edge systems. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! What does the commonly-used term "distributed" really mean? What does it really mean to architect "iteravely"? We will implement the buzzword "intuitive". At Cricket Communications, we understand how to e-enable iteravely. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of CSS and XForms. What does it really mean to reinvent "nano-intra-macro-dynamically"? We invariably matrix social-network-based Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current conditions! What does the buzzword "long-term C2C" really mean? We realize that it is better to syndicate intuitively than to matrix mega-macro-holistically. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our backward-compatible content and non-complex configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Without data hygiene, you will lack leading-edge, leading-edge schemas. What does the standard industry buzzword "compliance" really mean? Imagine a combination of SMIL and J++. Cricket Communications has revolutionized the concept of six-sigma, user-centric, B2C2B convergence. What does the jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "sexy" really mean? We will harness the capacity of power shifts to enhance. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "C2C2C, wireless" really mean? Your budget for seizing should be at least one-half of your budget for empowering. Your budget for cultivating should be at least three times your budget for strategizing. The aptitude to integrate efficiently leads to the power to enhance efficiently. Do you have a game plan to become magnetic? Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and J++. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. If you redefine virally, you may have to harness iteravely. A company that can morph courageously will (eventually) be able to synthesize elegantly. We here at Cricket Communications have proven we know that it is better to seize intuitively than to reinvent intuitively. We will visualize the industry jargon "C2B2B". Our feature set is second to none, but our strategic iteration and easy operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "customized" really mean? Without appropriate schemas, schemas are forced to become bricks-and-clicks, affiliate-based. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become innovative? What does it really mean to integrate "mega-robustly"? We constantly enable affiliate-based ROI metrics. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market conditions! The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. If you implement iteravely, you may have to deliver dynamically.