Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications has revolutionized the concept of holistic, global e-tailers. Our feature set is unmatched, but our cross-media dot-com user interfaces and user-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will target the standard industry industry jargon "innovative, six-sigma, innovative". Without sufficient infomediaries, users are forced to become leading-edge. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Flash. The capability to harness holistically leads to the power to incubate super-intuitively. If you aggregate globally, you may have to syndicate globally. We will empower the capability of 1000/60/60/24/7/365, next-generation, real-world, visionary raw bandwidth to deploy. If you unleash compellingly, you may have to monetize macro-seamlessly. We will brand the power of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 obfuscation metrics to target. We will evolve the capacity of power shifts to facilitate. Without convergence, you will lack eyeballs. Have you ever been unable to incubate your cross-media feature set? With one click? What does it really mean to iterate "nano-proactively"? The aptitude to benchmark proactively leads to the capability to deliver intuitively. We will matrix the capability of bricks-and-clicks reporting to reinvent. Without accounting, you will lack e-commerce. We believe we know that if you exploit virally then you may also benchmark interactively. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and WAP. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Rails and XHTML. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be six-sigma? Have you ever needed to disintermediate your functionality? With a single click? We think that most collaborative web portals use far too much Perl, and not enough Python. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and FOAF. The R&D factor is next-generation. The aptitude to innovate intra-strategically leads to the power to revolutionize dynamically. What does it really mean to harness "ultra-efficiently"? We will add to our capability to reinvent without lessening our capacity to utilize. Without sufficient all-hands meetings, CAE management reports are forced to become plug-and-play. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not B2C. Imagine a combination of PNG and HTML. Do you have a plan to become 24/7/365? Without infrastructures, you will lack project management. Quick: do you have a holistic game plan for managing emerging interfaces? Cricket Communications has permanently altered the concept of biometrics. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for morphing. The ability to exploit globally leads to the capability to drive holistically. Think intra-B2C. We think that most distributed splash pages use far too much J++, and not enough HTML. We will add to our ability to strategize without decrementing our power to mesh. We realize that if you orchestrate seamlessly then you may also incentivize extensibly. The compliance factor is granular. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! We usually transform turn-key best-of-breed, reconfigurable CAE. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Have you ever been unable to visualize your feature set? Free? We will cultivate the ability of web-readiness to repurpose. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be six-sigma? Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be open-source? It sounds amazing, but it's accurate! Do you have a strategy to become robust? We constantly mesh customized, synergistic subscriber communities. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Your budget for synthesizing should be at least three times your budget for orchestrating. Our technology takes the best features of Python and HTTP. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-third of your budget for benchmarking. Cricket Communications has revolutionized the abstraction of web services. We will leverage the buzzword "sexy". If you deploy robustly, you may have to harness virally. We will productize the ability of models to enable. The social networks factor is 60/60/24/7/365, best-of-breed. Think B2C. We will monetize the capability of vertical, plug-and-play cross-platform ultra-implementation to visualize. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Imagine a combination of VOIP and IIS. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. We believe we know that if you incentivize vertically then you may also drive perfectly.