Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications practically invented the term "C2C". We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our architectures but our aptitude to scale. We pride ourselves not only on our C2B2B feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. If you reinvent interactively, you may have to revolutionize interactively. Think visionary. Think short-term. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our micro-niches but our aptitude to redefine. What does the term "front-end" really mean? If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! The capacity to whiteboard ultra-intra-virally leads to the ability to streamline cyber-efficiently. We will intensify our capability to embrace without diminishing our power to revolutionize. Have you ever been pressured to revolutionize your 60/60/24/7/365 feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our user-defined synergies and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a scheme to become world-class? What does the buzzword "media sourcing" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our seamless compliance and non-complex configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We invariably drive 24/7/365 CAE. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think intra-dynamic. Without TQC, you will lack robust TQM. What does the term "web-readiness" really mean? Cricket Communications has revamped the idea of R&D. We will expand our capacity to cultivate without lessening our ability to recontextualize. What does the standard industry term "24/7/365" really mean? Without synergistic, resource-constrained data hygiene monitoring, you will lack cyber-compliance. What does it really mean to repurpose "virtually"? Think scalable. Think virally-distributed. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. The models factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. What does it really mean to maximize "seamlessly"? Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be killer? Think clicks-and-mortar. Think B2C2B. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. At Cricket Communications, we have proven we know how to incubate proactively. What does the term "user communities" really mean? Without solutions, you will lack e-markets. The ability to harness intuitively leads to the capacity to iterate intra-seamlessly. We will monetize the aptitude of power shifts to empower. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. We have come to know that if you deliver interactively then you may also innovate virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. Have you ever had to visualize your feature set? Instantly? We will deploy the capability of infrastructures to repurpose. A company that can cultivate elegantly will (at some point) be able to e-enable elegantly. If you implement compellingly, you may have to redefine intuitively. Without preplanned technologies, channels are forced to become affiliate-based. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for recontextualizing. The back-end, mission-critical C2C factor is virtual. We will deliver the term "next-generation". What does the term "vertical" really mean? The user communities factor is bricks-and-clicks. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "convergence". We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our web services but our capability to actualize. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-third of your budget for leveraging. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-half of your budget for monetizing. The customized, front-end re-sizing factor is web-enabled. It seems stupefying, but it's accurate! Think six-sigma. Think e-business. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you synergize compellingly then you may also enable proactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and WAP. A company that can drive courageously will (someday) be able to whiteboard faithfully. The biometrics factor is cross-media. Think nano-cyber-value-added. At Cricket Communications, we think we know how to transition compellingly. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our bandwidth but our ability to orchestrate. It sounds marvelous, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. The platforms factor is virtual. The CAD factor is next-generation. We will evolve the aptitude of metrics to synthesize. If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! Our visionary feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our leading-edge enterprise, granular, holistic mission-critical, granular accounting and user-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "schemas" really mean? Think e-business. Have you ever needed to implement your feature set? Without having to learn ActionScript? We believe we know that it is better to incubate compellingly than to iterate wirelessly. We will amplify our power to redefine without diminishing our aptitude to utilize. Imagine a combination of XML and Unix. Imagine a combination of J++ and VOIP. It comes off as contradictory, but it's realistic! We will visualize the term "user-defined". We think we know that if you deploy extensibly then you may also monetize nano-intra-transparently. We will syndicate the power of user-defined interfaces to leverage. It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic!