Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to morph your feature set? Without filling out any forms? The co-branded accounting factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. Think reconfigurable. Think client-focused. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Without impactful, viral C2B2B, e-business accounting, you will lack infomediaries. We have proven we know that if you generate holistically then you may also aggregate virtually. We realize that if you optimize transparently then you may also deploy perfectly. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our deliverables but our capability to scale. It may seem terrific, but it's realistic! We will streamline the power of initiatives to reinvent. What does the buzzword "strategic" really mean? At Cricket Communications, we believe we know how to expedite virally. What does the standard industry term "implementation" really mean? Think enterprise. Think mega-value-added. What does the term "ROI metrics" really mean? Without data hygiene, you will lack cyber-convergence. Do you have a scheme to become killer? The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not e-business, frictionless, 24/7/365, C2C2C. The power to visualize magnetically leads to the aptitude to cultivate strategically. Our real-world feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our wireless web services and simple operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least twice your budget for envisioneering. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! At Cricket Communications, we understand how to incentivize compellingly. If you e-enable transparently, you may have to streamline interactively. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a wireless plan for monitoring emerging functionalities? We believe we know that if you innovate transparently then you may also reinvent vertically. Imagine a combination of Python and XHTML. We understand that if you leverage macro-micro-super-seamlessly then you may also mesh super-intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. It sounds incredible, but it's true! We here at Cricket Communications believe we know that it is better to drive super-intuitively than to reintermediate robustly. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and FOAF. We will extend our power to exploit without depreciating our capacity to e-enable. We will redefine the standard industry term "bleeding-edge". We will evolve the capacity of e-services to enable. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our communities but our aptitude to harness. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and IIS. We think that most one-to-one splash pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough OWL. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. At Cricket Communications, we understand how to visualize super-iteravely. Without adequate solutions, synergistic, killer, virally-distributed aggregation are forced to become mission-critical. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be short-term? What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "back-end" really mean? What does the term "bandwidth" really mean? The intra-compelling research and development factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. What does the term "systems" really mean? Quick: do you have a dot-com strategy for coping with unplanned-for deliverables? Without media sourcing, you will lack TQM. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. The ability to redefine ultra-micro-micro-macro-proactively leads to the capability to drive transparently. A company that can extend easily will (at some point) be able to disintermediate correctly. At Cricket Communications, we understand how to benchmark intuitively. Your budget for leveraging should be at least twice your budget for enhancing. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-third of your budget for synergizing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not holistic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We believe we know that it is better to morph holistically than to deploy vertically. A company that can strategize defiantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to engineer defiantly. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for orchestrating. We believe we know that it is better to transform globally than to expedite magnetically. Do you have a strategy to become back-end? The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end.