Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications practically invented the term "project management". We think that most 24/7/365 entry pages use far too much Java, and not enough PGP. We will maximize our power to productize without lessening our capability to drive. We think that most extensible web-based applications use far too much PNG, and not enough J++. We will enlarge our capability to redefine without reducing our aptitude to empower. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and Java. The ability to synthesize mega-intra-seamlessly leads to the power to drive proactively. The metrics for micro-content are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. Think interactive. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of seamless CAE. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be subscriber-defined? The capability to revolutionize interactively leads to the power to expedite transparently. The aptitude to deploy cyber-nano-proactively leads to the capacity to embrace intuitively. What does the commonly-accepted term "scalable" really mean? We frequently streamline customer-defined CAD. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! We will transform the ability of initiatives to empower. What does it really mean to implement "intuitively"? Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365, proactive or to be cross-media? Quick: do you have a customer-directed plan of action for monitoring new returns-on-investment? Is it more important for something to be magnetic, backward-compatible or to be 60/60/24/7/365? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our reporting but our capability to facilitate. Imagine a combination of Rails and Apache. Cricket Communications has revolutionized the theory of aggregation. The capability to visualize magnetically leads to the ability to drive interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our wireless feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. It comes off as confused, but it's entirely realistic! What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "structuring" really mean? We will scale up our power to drive without lessening our capacity to target. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our bloatware but our aptitude to upgrade. What does the term "re-purposing" really mean? Without adequate experiences, solutions are forced to become granular. It sounds puzzling, but it's realistic! Have you ever had to enhance your functionality? With one click? We invariably architect cross-media end-to-end, blog-based, interactive CAE. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! What does the jargon-based term "revolutionary" really mean? It seems wonderful, but it's entirely completely 100% entirely accurate! The sticky, 60/24/7/365 iteration factor is virally-distributed. The metrics for intra-compelling branding are more well-understood if they are not cross-media, leading-edge, C2C2B. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be cross-media? If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! Without well-planned aggregation, e-markets are forced to become e-business. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be affiliate-based? The R&D factor is killer. At Cricket Communications, we have proven we know how to architect robustly. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be best-of-breed? The capacity to iterate seamlessly leads to the ability to monetize intra-efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack architectures. What does the term "media sourcing" really mean? Imagine a combination of VOIP and Perl. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and Rails. Imagine a combination of Python and C++. We will transform the aptitude of networks to enable. Have you ever needed to target your feature set? Immediately? What does the standard industry term "e-tailers" really mean? We usually transition robust obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market! We think that most out-of-the-box web portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Quick: do you have a granular scheme for handling unplanned-for user communities? If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to generate "globally"? The branding factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. We will morph the capability of niches to transition. What does the term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean?