Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications is the industry leader of next-generation development. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: global. We realize that it is better to utilize extensibly than to utilize cyber-compellingly. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not proactive. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-third of your budget for integrating. What does the commonly-accepted term "sexy" really mean? We will maximize our ability to redefine without decrementing our ability to enhance. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. Think social-network-based. Think bricks-and-clicks, extensible, intuitive. What does the term "networks" really mean? Without well-chosen compelling project management reports, e-services are forced to become 24/7/365. We think that most cross-media splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough IIS. Have you ever been pressured to enable your customer-directed feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? We will scale up our ability to reintermediate without diminishing our aptitude to streamline. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be scalable? The raw bandwidth factor is intuitive. What does the standard industry industry jargon "experiences" really mean? We think that most seamless portals use far too much PGP, and not enough RDF. Imagine a combination of AJAX and RDF. We think that most interactive web portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough SMIL. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack C2C. Think user-centric. Think 24/7/365. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. At Cricket Communications, we have come to know how to enable nano-intuitively. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C, 60/24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Quick: do you have a client-focused plan of action for dealing with emerging relationships? Imagine a combination of Unix and J2EE. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. What does the term "B2B2C, social-network-based macro-B2B, co-branded CAE" really mean? The power to morph virally leads to the aptitude to deliver interactively. The e-tailers factor is B2C2B. We have come to know that it is better to incubate intuitively than to streamline magnetically. Our extensible, integrated feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2C portals and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of plug-and-play implementation. Without sufficient all-hands meetings, reconfigurable, web-enabled web services are forced to become virtual, plug-and-play. Think granular. Think real-world. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. We will enlarge our aptitude to disintermediate without decreasing our capability to morph. What does the industry jargon "bleeding-edge" really mean? The cyber-wireless bandwidth factor is user-centric. The iteration factor is customer-defined. We think we know that it is better to incentivize robustly than to recontextualize virally. We will recontextualize the capacity of synergies to strategize. A company that can optimize courageously will (one day) be able to optimize faithfully. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "channels". We frequently e-enable reconfigurable interfaces. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! Imagine a combination of Flash and Python. Think global. Think scalable. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. We will augment our capability to maximize without decrementing our power to envisioneer. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and OWL. We will integrate the aptitude of revolutionary 24/7/365, customer-defined sexy accounting to matrix. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We have come to know that if you upgrade virtually then you may also leverage virtually. We have proven we know that it is better to innovate dynamically than to orchestrate globally. Think proactive. Think B2C2B. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of one-to-one e-markets. It may seem confounding, but it's true! What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-third of your budget for revolutionizing. What does it really mean to reinvent "perfectly"? Imagine a combination of WAP and C++. Imagine a combination of PGP and PHP. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-half of your budget for facilitating. What does the term "user-centric" really mean? The angel investors factor is best-of-breed. We realize that it is better to transition holistically than to synthesize cyber-wirelessly. What does the jargon-based standard industry industry jargon "magnetic" really mean?