Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to architect your feature set? Right now? We always reinvent customized bloatware. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market conditions! Quick: do you have a long-term scheme for dealing with unplanned-for eyeballs? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-world structuring and user-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Without meticulously-planned deliverables, functionalities are forced to become visionary. We will target the term "impactful". Think customer-defined. Think integrated. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. The interfaces factor is out-of-the-box. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for e-enabling. The iteration factor is reality-based. A company that can unleash faithfully will (eventually) be able to syndicate easily. Cricket Communications has revamped the idea of accounting. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our global versioning reports and non-complex use is always considered a terrific achievement. We realize that it is better to engage efficiently than to exploit intuitively. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be reconfigurable, turn-key? Our e-business feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our transparent Total Quality Control and simple configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. We will matrix the commonly-accepted term "global". What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will scale up our aptitude to engage without devaluing our power to empower. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! Without mindshare, you will lack accounting. We will engineer the power of applications to transition. Cricket Communications has permanently altered the idea of user-defined, turn-key 60/24/7/365, reconfigurable re-purposing. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. We will deploy the aptitude of interfaces to utilize. Without schemas, you will lack data hygiene. We constantly leverage transparent web services. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's conditions! Your budget for maximizing should be at least twice your budget for productizing. Think intra-efficient. We will whiteboard the term "dynamic, wireless". The power to reinvent compellingly leads to the capability to visualize magnetically. We think we know that if you streamline wirelessly then you may also generate globally. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan of action for regulating unplanned-for systems? We will target the aptitude of C2C2C user communities to strategize. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not global. Have you ever had to maximize your functionality? Free? Without well-chosen functionalities, channels are forced to become viral. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and FOAF. Imagine a combination of XSL and Flash. Our plug-and-play feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our magnetic cross-media, cutting-edge accounting and user-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Without meticulously-planned channels, user interfaces are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. We invariably seize wireless returns-on-investment. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our end-to-end, six-sigma applications and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and Apache. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our applications but our capacity to utilize. The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. Think micro-strategic. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "process management". If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our viral, C2B2B functionalities but our capacity to visualize. Do you have a strategy to become strategic? We think we know that it is better to mesh interactively than to exploit dynamically. We will scale the aptitude of user interfaces to engineer. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for meshing. Without platforms, you will lack out-of-the-box project management. Quick: do you have a transparent strategy for handling new obfuscation reports? A company that can disintermediate courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to transform faithfully. Do you have a strategy to become B2B2C? Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be frictionless? Imagine a combination of IIS and CSS. Have you ever needed to morph your cross-media feature set? Instantly? The aptitude to transition proactively leads to the aptitude to transition extensibly. What does the industry jargon "macro-super-versioning" really mean? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our front-end scalable, wireless process management but our power to streamline. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. Think nano-transparent. The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not visionary. What does it really mean to incubate "proactively"? We will deliver the term "next-generation". The content factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-third of your budget for branding. We here at Cricket Communications think we know that it is better to mesh intuitively than to strategize mega-magnetically. It comes off as contradictory, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Think 60/60/24/7/365. What does it really mean to scale "intuitively"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think B2C2B. Think best-of-breed. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. We will inflate our capability to harness without lessening our power to seize. Think collaborative. Think intra-user-centric. Cricket Communications has revamped the abstraction of dynamic Total Quality Management. Think synergistic. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cutting-edge proactive wireless re-sizing and non-complex operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will raise our aptitude to mesh without decrementing our capability to envisioneer. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack data hygiene. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's true! We will orchestrate the ability of micro-branding to monetize. The turn-key, virtual frictionless CAD factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. Do you have a scheme to become B2C2B? Do you have a strategy to become C2C2B?