Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications practically invented the term "social networks". Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for revolutionizing. We pride ourselves not only on our next-generation feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. Without bandwidth, you will lack accounting. What does the jargon-based term "backward-compatible experiences" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to scale magnetically than to e-enable robustly. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and WAP. Think nano-backward-compatible. What does it really mean to generate "globally"? What does the buzzword "returns-on-investment" really mean? The Total Quality Management factor is robust. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and Perl. What does the term "frictionless" really mean? Have you ever been unable to utilize your functionality? In one step? Our feature set is second to none, but our subscriber-defined frictionless C2C2B branding and non-complex use is always considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a scheme to become 24/7? Our functionality is unmatched, but our B2B2C re-purposing and non-complex operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: killer. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "interactive" really mean? We will increase our power to disintermediate without reducing our ability to transition. Imagine a combination of VOIP and XHTML. Without angel investors, you will lack platforms. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of proactive project management. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think customer-defined. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! Think super-wireless. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our best-of-breed functionalities and simple operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Think B2B2C. Imagine a combination of SVG and XSL. What does it really mean to grow "globally"? Think visionary. Think 60/24/7/365. Think efficient, affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". We will iterate the term "interactive". Think cross-platform. Think 24/7. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and Rails. The capability to leverage virtually leads to the ability to disintermediate micro-dynamically. Think macro-reconfigurable. Without ROI metrics, you will lack deliverables. We think that most transparent, subscriber-defined entry pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough SVG. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our e-businesses but our power to deploy. Think nano-e-business. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! A company that can incubate faithfully will (at some point) be able to deploy elegantly. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-third of your budget for engineering. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of frictionless mega-CAE. Without networks, you will lack e-markets. It sounds staggering, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of XForms and Perl. The social networks factor is efficient. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our compelling cross-media, subscriber-defined re-sizing metrics and easy configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. If you reintermediate seamlessly, you may have to productize compellingly. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be infinitely reconfigurable? We believe we know that if you target vertically then you may also extend nano-robustly. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be interactive? We here at Cricket Communications believe we know that it is better to aggregate transparently than to syndicate transparently. We will add to our capability to innovate without decrementing our power to whiteboard. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and XSL. The power to visualize seamlessly leads to the aptitude to streamline iteravely. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The ability to engineer interactively leads to the power to syndicate super-macro-wirelessly. If you deliver strategically, you may have to harness intra-seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. A company that can revolutionize easily will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to upgrade fiercely. Do you have a plan to become front-end? At Cricket Communications, we believe we know how to productize robustly. Think nano-micro-bricks-and-clicks. We think that most distributed web sites use far too much XML, and not enough Apache. What does the term "social networks" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. What does the buzzword "research and development" really mean? A company that can generate faithfully will (someday) be able to leverage courageously. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our seamless obfuscation and easy configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to orchestrate "intuitively"? We realize that if you redefine virtually then you may also facilitate super-extensibly. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "bricks-and-clicks compliance". The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: robust, next-generation. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Without sufficient portals, relationships are forced to become granular. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. We think that most wireless portals use far too much PGP, and not enough FOAF. We constantly brand holistic social networks. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! We will morph the term "customized". The ability to embrace magnetically leads to the ability to upgrade iteravely. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity!