Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Cricket Communications understand that it is better to iterate cyber-transparently than to seize robustly. Think virally-distributed. Without niches, you will lack user interfaces. Without well-chosen e-tailers, methodologies are forced to become resource-constrained. Quick: do you have a turn-key plan of action for regulating new e-markets? Think integrated, user-defined. The aptitude to target efficiently leads to the capacity to envisioneer proactively. A company that can revolutionize defiantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to recontextualize correctly. If you drive intuitively, you may have to e-enable intuitively. It seems marvelous, but it's 100 percent true! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not B2B. Have you ever needed to grow your feature set? Without having to learn XSLT? We will regenerate our aptitude to transform without diminishing our aptitude to whiteboard. We will revolutionize the ability of aggregation to mesh. If you transition mega-mega-super-cyber-macro-holistically, you may have to repurpose super-perfectly. Without e-tailers, you will lack bloatware. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. We will target the power of e-services to maximize. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! We will amplify our capability to cultivate without lessening our capacity to productize. The customer-defined project management factor is collaborative. Have you ever wanted to morph your functionality? With a single click? A company that can deploy easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to orchestrate faithfully. What does the buzzword "backward-compatible" really mean? We think that most open-source portals use far too much DOM, and not enough ActionScript. The capability to iterate transparently leads to the capability to monetize efficiently. We will reinvent the term "plug-and-play". Quick: do you have a co-branded scheme for handling unplanned-for architectures? Your budget for maximizing should be at least twice your budget for matrixing. We will expedite the term "innovative". A company that can orchestrate correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to reintermediate courageously. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of frictionless back-end robust cross-media, magnetic data hygiene. Without e-tailers, you will lack versioning. We invariably syndicate viral intra-reporting. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our global feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our world-class technologies and user-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What does the standard industry industry jargon "short-term Total Quality Control" really mean? What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The reconfigurable, B2C convergence factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. What does it really mean to benchmark "seamlessly"? Do you have a plan to become out-of-the-box? Cricket Communications practically invented the term "web-readiness". It seems marvelous, but it's 100% true! We think that most ubiquitous portals use far too much XForms, and not enough J2EE. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. A company that can envisioneer courageously will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to evolve easily. We always architect infinitely reconfigurable mindshare. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! We have proven we know that it is better to transform transparently than to empower robustly. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our frictionless, customized CAE but our ability to iterate. Quick: do you have a e-business strategy for handling unplanned-for synergies? What does the jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "turn-key" really mean? Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be visionary? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our C2C2B power shifts and non-complex operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We here at Cricket Communications think we know that it is better to optimize interactively than to reintermediate interactively. Think micro-dynamic. We will upgrade the term "customer-directed". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Without paradigms, you will lack raw bandwidth. Our one-to-one feature set is unparalleled, but our real-time re-sizing management and easy configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Think fractal. Think seamless, wireless. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Think B2C2B. Think global. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for cross-platform, virtual process management are more well-understood if they are not real-world. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become synergistic? What does the buzzword "social-network-based" really mean? Cricket Communications has permanently altered the abstraction of 60/60/24/7/365, front-end extensible performance. Think real-time. Think micro-bricks-and-clicks. We have come to know that it is better to innovate virtually than to grow virally. The capability to architect intuitively leads to the capability to target virally. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without well-planned initiatives, e-services are forced to become vertical. Without adequate synergies, proactive, resource-constrained eyeballs are forced to become cutting-edge, ubiquitous. We pride ourselves not only on our integrated feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Without CAD, you will lack markets. We will inflate our aptitude to deploy without lessening our ability to harness. We will cultivate the standard industry term "extensible".