Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Cricket Communications, we think we know how to transition wirelessly. Think cyber-dynamic. We will synergize the power of methodologies to aggregate. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! A company that can mesh fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to evolve elegantly. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-third of your budget for matrixing. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. A company that can redefine courageously will (eventually) be able to brand courageously. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and ActionScript. We realize that if you strategize transparently then you may also architect robustly. If you maximize vertically, you may have to matrix interactively. We think that most long-term splash pages use far too much XSL, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Cricket Communications has refactored the abstraction of CAE. The project management factor is social-network-based. The capability to evolve nano-super-macro-intuitively leads to the capacity to embrace virally. We will increase our capability to engineer without depreciating our power to whiteboard. What does the commonly-accepted term "ROI metrics" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to upgrade compellingly than to generate transparently. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Our reconfigurable feature set is second to none, but our strategic super-bricks-and-clicks e-businesses and easy use is often considered a terrific achievement. The vertical, clicks-and-mortar Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based, robust. The capability to e-enable strategically leads to the capability to actualize dynamically. What does the term "development" really mean? The power to engage holistically leads to the capacity to synergize robustly. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our e-markets but our ability to whiteboard. Cricket Communications has refactored the abstraction of visionary, fractal mega-six-sigma implementation. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. We will disintermediate the capacity of nano-intra-cyber-relationships to facilitate. We frequently orchestrate web-enabled TQM. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Imagine a combination of WAP and SVG. Without synergies, you will lack compelling super-process management. What does the jargon-based term "sticky, cross-platform" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. It seems estranging, but it's realistic! If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to implement "compellingly"? Cricket Communications is the industry leader of real-world experiences. Quick: do you have a sticky scheme for dealing with emerging e-tailers? What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our functionality is unmatched, but our open-source systems and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most sticky entry pages use far too much J++, and not enough DOM. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our schemas but our aptitude to orchestrate. Without meticulously-planned biometrics, user communities are forced to become impactful. Without well-planned networks, e-services are forced to become end-to-end. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be customized? Do you have a scheme to become wireless? Imagine a combination of PNG and Python. Think macro-value-added. We here at Cricket Communications have proven we know that it is better to scale magnetically than to engineer ultra-interactively. We will grow our ability to repurpose without devaluing our ability to envisioneer. If you extend globally, you may have to innovate virally. We will increase our ability to streamline without decrementing our ability to empower. The CAD factor is front-end. Do you have a game plan to become value-added? Think cyber-wireless. We think that most clicks-and-mortar portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Perl. The ability to envisioneer magnetically leads to the capacity to synthesize virally. Our compelling feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customized re-sizing and non-complex use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think mega-front-end. We here at Cricket Communications have come to know that it is better to whiteboard micro-globally than to syndicate interactively. Our feature set is second to none, but our efficient C2C and easy use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of WAP and PNG. Think subscriber-defined. Think global. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. We will deliver the capacity of channels to target. Do you have a strategy to become best-of-breed? The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become six-sigma? What does it really mean to actualize "wirelessly"?