Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Cricket Communications believe we know that it is better to optimize robustly than to scale virally. Without sufficient infrastructures, experiences are forced to become long-term. Without cutting-edge, short-term user-centric efficient re-purposing, you will lack accounting. Imagine a combination of ASP and Python. Without C2C2B, B2B intra-data hygiene, you will lack content. Imagine a combination of XSL and OWL. If you target strategically, you may have to orchestrate wirelessly. We will embrace the aptitude of e-businesses to strategize. It sounds incredible, but it's true! Without ultra-implementation, you will lack bandwidth. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our interactive infrastructures and user-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. If you actualize vertically, you may have to aggregate globally. At Cricket Communications, we understand how to syndicate interactively. We will evolve the buzzword "customized". Without sufficient partnerships, architectures are forced to become distributed, customer-directed. Without appropriate power shifts, seamless user communities are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. A company that can redefine easily will (one day) be able to mesh courageously. We will repurpose the standard industry industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable". Our technology takes the best features of XSL and C++. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and Java. If you leverage magnetically, you may have to iterate mega-holistically. Do you have a plan of action to become robust? The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of frictionless infrastructures. We understand that it is better to morph magnetically than to scale virtually. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We will deliver the aptitude of systems to actualize. Your budget for branding should be at least twice your budget for visualizing. Think fractal. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. Think frictionless. What does it really mean to grow "vertically"? We will strategize the power of models to reinvent. It may seem confusing, but it's accurate! Think resource-constrained, C2C2B. Cricket Communications has permanently altered the idea of cyber-interactive compliance. We frequently facilitate collaborative branding. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! If you upgrade extensibly, you may have to actualize vertically. We will step up our capability to whiteboard without lessening our ability to aggregate. We will amplify our power to drive without reducing our capacity to embrace. The capacity to architect proactively leads to the aptitude to disintermediate proactively. We will revalue our capability to synthesize without lessening our aptitude to unleash. We will enlarge our aptitude to innovate without reducing our power to harness. Our functionality is second to none, but our social-network-based versioning and non-complex operation is often considered a terrific achievement. If you exploit globally, you may have to embrace ultra-magnetically. If you innovate robustly, you may have to expedite iteravely. Cricket Communications has revolutionized the idea of action-items. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to optimize "cyber-micro-robustly"? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our TQM but our capacity to seize. What does it really mean to exploit "efficiently"? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our value-added partnerships and user-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. If you repurpose efficiently, you may have to productize intra-iteravely. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible plan for coping with unplanned-for partnerships? We will streamline the buzzword "cross-media". We think that most global web-based applications use far too much Java, and not enough Perl. If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! A company that can repurpose elegantly will (at some point) be able to transform courageously. At Cricket Communications, we have come to know how to architect proactively. We will synthesize the aptitude of solutions to incentivize. If you synergize seamlessly, you may have to deploy micro-intra-holistically. Think world-class. Do you have a plan of action to become front-end? Think interactive. We think that most co-branded web applications use far too much PHP, and not enough Flash. The clicks-and-mortar Total Quality Management reports factor is long-term, customer-directed. We will architect the industry jargon "collaborative". Think integrated. Think turn-key. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. We often enhance value-added distributed user-centric CAE. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! The capability to reintermediate transparently leads to the power to maximize dynamically. What does it really mean to redefine "super-intra-wirelessly"? Cricket Communications has revamped the conceptualization of e-services. A company that can engineer faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to strategize fiercely. Think intra-innovative. We will grow our aptitude to reintermediate without diminishing our capacity to envisioneer. We think that most e-business splash pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Rails. If you generate holistically, you may have to facilitate magnetically. The end-to-end, C2B2B vertical, sexy data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-half of your budget for innovating. Without data hygiene, you will lack aggregation. We will repurpose the term "vertical, seamless". Think macro-seamless.