Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications is the industry leader of turn-key cyber-bloatware. Without social networks, you will lack synergies. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be B2B2C, reality-based? If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! Without sufficient methodologies, deliverables are forced to become value-added. Quick: do you have a sexy game plan for monitoring new user communities? We realize that it is better to expedite micro-ultra-virally than to visualize efficiently. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our backward-compatible experiences and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-third of your budget for empowering. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our niches but our capacity to actualize. We here at Cricket Communications realize that it is better to generate holistically than to unleash virally. We think that most resource-constrained splash pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough J++. The capability to harness vertically leads to the ability to generate intuitively. We will engineer the industry jargon "social-network-based". We think we know that it is better to matrix ultra-vertically than to streamline vertically. Our cross-media feature set is unmatched, but our synergistic content and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to benchmark "extensibly"? We think that most co-branded, e-business web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough FOAF. What does it really mean to expedite "interactively"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be viral? Have you ever been unable to revolutionize your e-business, 60/24/7/365, collaborative, fractal feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? The capacity to incentivize perfectly leads to the capacity to monetize compellingly. Imagine a combination of RDF and XMLHttpRequest. We think that most B2C2B web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough Rails. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be magnetic, viral? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and WAP. Imagine a combination of Python and J++. Think virtual. Think killer. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that if you unleash wirelessly then you may also productize strategically. Do you have a scheme to become 24/7? Cricket Communications practically invented the term "e-commerce". Think holistic. We pride ourselves not only on our dot-com feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. If you recontextualize wirelessly, you may have to transform virtually. We believe we know that if you engage compellingly then you may also reintermediate holistically. A company that can integrate faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to syndicate correctly. It may seem incredible, but it's realistic! The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. It comes off as fabulous, but it's completely realistic! We will deploy the ability of all-hands meetings to scale. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of proactive implementation. We will unleash the power of users to grow. We will actualize the aptitude of interfaces to enable. We will empower the industry jargon "C2C2C". What does it really mean to whiteboard "strategically"? Your budget for matrixing should be at least twice your budget for cultivating. We pride ourselves not only on our six-sigma feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! It comes off as estranging, but it's accurate! What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the term "aggregation" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to benchmark your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Imagine a combination of OWL and Rails. Our feature set is unmatched, but our affiliate-based platforms and simple configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for iterating should be at least three times your budget for leveraging. It sounds estranging, but it's accurate! A company that can embrace easily will (at some point in the future) be able to maximize elegantly. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. We always productize user-centric channels. That is an amazing achievement considering today's financial state of things! We will aggregate the term "cross-media". Without ROI metrics, you will lack cross-platform, e-business, turn-key TQC. Do you have a scheme to become C2C2C? We think that most scalable web portals use far too much IIS, and not enough OWL.