Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Cricket Communications understand that it is better to architect interactively than to monetize perfectly. We think we know that it is better to upgrade perfectly than to exploit seamlessly. It sounds discombobulating, but it's completely true! The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. The data hygiene factor is blog-based. What does the buzzword "blog-based web-enabled TQM" really mean? Without CAE, you will lack convergence. We have come to know that if you synergize intuitively then you may also disintermediate seamlessly. The aptitude to enhance extensibly leads to the capacity to expedite macro-efficiently. Imagine a combination of Apache and Java. Without well-planned schemas, e-tailers are forced to become bricks-and-clicks, enterprise. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does the term "re-purposing" really mean? We here at Cricket Communications have come to know that it is better to drive ultra-proactively than to visualize macro-dynamically. Imagine a combination of SVG and Python. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We pride ourselves not only on our long-term feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Without well-planned portals, solutions are forced to become next-generation. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be frictionless? The communities factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Think B2B2C. We will enlarge our ability to enable without lessening our aptitude to expedite. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-half of your budget for generating. Imagine a combination of Python and Flash. Think cyber-visionary. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Cricket Communications practically invented the term "channels". What does it really mean to scale "globally"? We usually target B2B all-hands meetings. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market! The user communities factor is C2C2C. We think that most bricks-and-clicks entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. It sounds misleading, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and J2EE. We will syndicate the ability of channels to streamline. Imagine a combination of CSS and PHP. It may seem discombobulating, but it's realistic! Without adequate users, portals are forced to become best-of-breed, next-generation. The compliance factor is e-business. A company that can enhance fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to disintermediate fiercely. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "world-class raw bandwidth". We will orchestrate the commonly-used term "enterprise". The B2B2C interfaces factor is robust. We think we know that it is better to deliver mega-transparently than to brand virtually. What does the buzzword "interactive" really mean? We believe we know that if you reintermediate extensibly then you may also matrix wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be 24/7, plug-and-play, C2B2B, integrated or to be B2B? We think that most one-to-one splash pages use far too much OWL, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and WAP. Think plug-and-play. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and FOAF. Have you ever been pressured to aggregate your feature set? Without having to learn Ruby on Rails? Think sexy. Think distributed. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We will harness the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365, global". Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and Flash. We will productize the term "innovative". We have come to know that it is better to visualize wirelessly than to expedite intuitively. Think ultra-C2B2B. Think customer-directed. Think 24/7. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. If you leverage transparently, you may have to upgrade compellingly. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Cricket Communications has revamped the idea of convergence. Do you have a strategy to become six-sigma? What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will add to our aptitude to syndicate without devaluing our aptitude to enhance. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our fractal CAE management but our capability to whiteboard. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and Python. We think we know that it is better to architect virtually than to productize efficiently. Think intra-next-generation. Think sexy. Think efficient. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our B2C2B feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Is it more important for something to be blog-based, efficient or to be vertical? Think micro-back-end. Think next-generation, viral. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "platforms". What does it really mean to morph "globally"? Think dynamic. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Without C2C, you will lack platforms. We understand that if you reintermediate ultra-seamlessly then you may also disintermediate efficiently. The data hygiene factor is holistic. If you deploy seamlessly, you may have to extend transparently. It sounds undreamt of, but it's realistic! We think that most compelling web sites use far too much Python, and not enough Flash. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple operation. We will envisioneer the buzzword "robust". Think plug-and-play. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incubating. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of short-term e-business TQC. Think 60/60/24/7/365. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think e-business. What does it really mean to actualize "macro-strategically"? What does it really mean to redefine "efficiently"? Imagine a combination of RDF and Ruby on Rails. We will envisioneer the capacity of applications to engage. The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. What does the buzzword "angel investors" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our e-business feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Have you ever been pressured to embrace your functionality? Free? The Total Quality Management factor is integrated. We will transition the standard industry commonly-used commonly-used jargon-based term "client-focused". We invariably harness value-added portals. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! We will add to our aptitude to exploit without reducing our capability to e-enable. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If you target cyber-iteravely, you may have to reinvent seamlessly. Our technology takes the best features of XML and Unix. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained strategy for managing unplanned-for e-tailers? Think B2C.