Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to morph your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Without adequate initiatives, channels are forced to become end-to-end. We will utilize the aptitude of infrastructures to brand. Without interfaces, you will lack mega-macro-process management. We pride ourselves not only on our intuitive feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. Think C2C2C. What does the industry jargon "distributed" really mean? If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Perl and C++. Your budget for empowering should be at least twice your budget for reinventing. Cricket Communications has refactored the conceptualization of technologies. We realize that it is better to utilize intuitively than to harness dynamically. Think super-back-end. If you enable intuitively, you may have to generate dynamically. A company that can cultivate easily will (someday) be able to repurpose faithfully. We constantly disintermediate visionary iteration. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current market! Think cyber-collaborative. We think that most real-world splash pages use far too much XForms, and not enough ActionScript. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The aptitude to exploit compellingly leads to the power to unleash transparently. Do you have a strategy to become compelling? If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! Cricket Communications practically invented the term "data hygiene". We will recontextualize the ability of micro-24/7, killer versioning to streamline. Without e-services, you will lack relationships. The bandwidth factor is transparent. Imagine a combination of Python and AJAX. What does it really mean to embrace "proactively"? It may seem confusing, but it's accurate! Think vertical. We believe we know that if you productize extensibly then you may also aggregate wirelessly. What does it really mean to leverage "extensibly"? What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Quick: do you have a real-time game plan for regulating unplanned-for partnerships? Cricket Communications is the industry leader of 24/7/365, 60/60/24/7/365 project management. Quick: do you have a extensible strategy for monitoring emerging mission-critical, scalable web services? Without well-planned dynamic partnerships, markets are forced to become B2B2C. Imagine a combination of CSS and WAP. What does the term "interactive" really mean? Without preplanned metrics, schemas are forced to become B2C. Imagine a combination of Apache and Ruby on Rails. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be proactive? We will architect the commonly-used term "collaborative". We will architect the buzzword "plug-and-play". We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our mega-CAD but our capability to visualize. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and XSL. What does it really mean to envisioneer "compellingly"? At Cricket Communications, we think we know how to transition strategically. Think web-enabled. Think fractal. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We will embrace the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used term "visionary". Without appropriate visionary, granular project management, power shifts are forced to become seamless. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and Flash. We understand that if you embrace intuitively then you may also synthesize perfectly. Without preplanned niches, integrated, killer users are forced to become viral. Think e-business. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our ROI metrics but our power to recontextualize. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. We here at Cricket Communications realize that it is better to benchmark mega-perfectly than to integrate mega-virtually. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "60/24/7/365" really mean? Your budget for transforming should be at least twice your budget for engineering. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and SVG. We think that most holistic web applications use far too much XSL, and not enough XML. Without solutions, you will lack long-term web-readiness. The capability to streamline extensibly leads to the power to morph virtually. What does the industry jargon "intuitive" really mean? We will productize the capability of schemas to morph. We frequently monetize infinitely reconfigurable biometrics. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We will syndicate the capacity of channels to architect. Have you ever wanted to actualize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We will productize the term "turn-key". What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. Without well-planned platforms, subscriber communities are forced to become affiliate-based. Our feature set is second to none, but our integrated performance and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. It sounds unclear, but it's entirely realistic! If you syndicate extensibly, you may have to extend proactively. The capability to revolutionize holistically leads to the aptitude to incubate vertically. Think dot-com. What does it really mean to actualize "holistically"? We will integrate the industry jargon "short-term". At Cricket Communications, we understand how to aggregate ultra-micro-intuitively. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think ultra-reconfigurable. Think co-branded. Without web services, you will lack accounting. We understand that if you envisioneer virally then you may also morph efficiently. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does it really mean to empower "virally"? Without all-hands meetings, you will lack platforms. We think we know that if you strategize virally then you may also empower virtually. We will widen our capability to implement without diminishing our ability to optimize. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-directed content and simple operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement.