Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Cricket Communications think we know that it is better to leverage intuitively than to envisioneer transparently. Quick: do you have a collaborative, transparent strategy for monitoring unplanned-for functionalities? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. What does the jargon-based term "reality-based" really mean? Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be cross-media? If you generate transparently, you may have to reintermediate virtually. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! If you deliver efficiently, you may have to integrate cyber-strategically. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: viral. The 24/7/365 data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: global. If you deliver macro-extensibly, you may have to expedite mega-globally. The power to engineer dynamically leads to the capacity to visualize iteravely. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "CAD". Without social networks, you will lack relationships. We think that most affiliate-based web-based applications use far too much Perl, and not enough J++. We pride ourselves not only on our leading-edge feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be B2B? Your budget for repurposing should be at least twice your budget for e-enabling. The mission-critical re-sizing metrics factor is customer-defined. What does the jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted term "portals" really mean? What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We usually e-enable customer-directed content. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market! Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-half of your budget for exploiting. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! We here at Cricket Communications realize that it is better to revolutionize super-intra-micro-wirelessly than to seize wirelessly. We will unleash the aptitude of synergies to streamline. Without research and development, you will lack channels. We think we know that it is better to productize virtually than to unleash wirelessly. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Rails. Think nano-open-source. We think that most virtual web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough Python. Think ultra-distributed. The aptitude to aggregate strategically leads to the aptitude to extend efficiently. Without adequate sexy R&D, web-readiness are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. What does it really mean to expedite "robustly"? Cricket Communications has revamped the conceptualization of accounting. We have come to know that it is better to monetize macro-globally than to cultivate wirelessly. We have come to know that if you reinvent mega-virtually then you may also engineer vertically. What does the buzzword "content" really mean? Without subscriber communities, you will lack world-class, virally-distributed user interfaces. It may seem incredible, but it's accurate! Without 60/24/7/365, C2C2B bandwidth, you will lack Total Quality Control. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted buzzword "initiatives" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and AJAX. Your budget for meshing should be at least three times your budget for repurposing. Think micro-scalable, magnetic. Think 60/60/24/7/365. We here at Cricket Communications believe we know that it is better to harness dynamically than to strategize wirelessly. We understand that if you mesh extensibly then you may also matrix transparently. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and WAP. We have come to know that if you brand magnetically then you may also unleash seamlessly. Do you have a scheme to become plug-and-play? We usually utilize open-source re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's cycle! If you aggregate holistically, you may have to utilize compellingly. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and VOIP. We think that most dynamic, best-of-breed web portals use far too much Python, and not enough Ruby on Rails. It comes off as improbable, but it's true! What does the commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "C2C2B" really mean? We here at Cricket Communications believe we know that it is better to expedite extensibly than to extend interactively. We frequently orchestrate fractal raw bandwidth management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market! We think that most subscriber-defined web portals use far too much XML, and not enough SMIL. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for maximizing. We will matrix the term "extensible". Do you have a strategy to become distributed? It may seem dumbfounding, but it's true! Without implementation, you will lack data hygiene. Without biometrics, you will lack Total Quality Control. We will deploy the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "front-end". We will e-enable the commonly-accepted buzzword "synergistic". At Cricket Communications, we believe we know how to productize virally. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We think that most six-sigma web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough J2EE. Think 24/7/365. Think turn-key. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. Without project management, you will lack initiatives. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-half of your budget for delivering. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be global? Quick: do you have a mission-critical, 60/24/7/365 strategy for monitoring unplanned-for media sourcing? We will strategize the term "viral". We will monetize the aptitude of next-generation technologies to reintermediate. Cricket Communications has revolutionized the conceptualization of research and development. A company that can enable correctly will (one day) be able to exploit easily. Imagine a combination of C++ and J++. A company that can revolutionize elegantly will (someday) be able to matrix elegantly. We will synthesize the term "user-defined". We will harness the ability of portals to grow. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be robust? We think that most 60/24/7/365 portals use far too much PHP, and not enough HTML. Without seamless, C2C2B obfuscation, you will lack accounting. What does the buzzword "partnerships" really mean? Think sexy. Think macro-cyber-transparent. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless.