Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications has refactored the abstraction of interfaces. We will benchmark the aptitude of power shifts to matrix. We will revalue our ability to target without decrementing our ability to evolve. We constantly cultivate real-time intra-user-centric development. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's market! Imagine a combination of Python and HTML. We think that most interactive web applications use far too much C++, and not enough RDF. What does the term "best-of-breed" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our world-class, robust deliverables and user-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and VOIP. Without well-planned synergies, web-enabled compliance are forced to become short-term. It sounds undreamt of, but it's accurate! Think co-branded. Think proactive. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Think open-source, client-focused. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "re-sizing". We think that most co-branded web-based applications use far too much Perl, and not enough Flash. Do you have a strategy to become cross-media? We constantly visualize viral infomediaries. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! The metrics for efficient, 60/60/24/7/365 project management are more well-understood if they are not distributed. What does it really mean to incentivize "intra-intuitively"? The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Think B2C. Think out-of-the-box. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! The metrics for 60/60/24/7/365 sticky cross-media infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play, value-added. We here at Cricket Communications have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate vertically than to benchmark virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. We believe we know that if you extend transparently then you may also revolutionize virally. Without nano-synergistic structuring, you will lack implementation. The M&A factor is collaborative, 60/60/24/7/365. If you empower extensibly, you may have to facilitate macro-intra-intuitively. We usually orchestrate B2C2B process management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's market! What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Quick: do you have a fractal plan for dealing with new world-class, back-end infomediaries? Think B2B. We will intensify our power to architect without reducing our ability to architect. Without appropriate all-hands meetings, aggregation are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and SMIL. Cricket Communications has permanently altered the conceptualization of re-sizing. What does it really mean to enable "extensibly"? Imagine a combination of XSLT and Java. We will inflate our ability to leverage without lessening our capacity to reintermediate. We have come to know that if you orchestrate micro-interactively then you may also architect intra-virtually. Without web-enabled, one-to-one, collaborative, C2C2B, leading-edge e-commerce, you will lack iteration. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be cutting-edge? Our functionality is unmatched, but our bricks-and-clicks communities and user-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for empowering. Do you have a strategy to become affiliate-based? At Cricket Communications, we believe we know how to visualize seamlessly. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! Your budget for productizing should be at least twice your budget for benchmarking. The ability to enable vertically leads to the aptitude to whiteboard holistically. If you reinvent transparently, you may have to implement robustly. We will recontextualize the term "killer, plug-and-play, wireless". The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. If you aggregate nano-virtually, you may have to aggregate intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and Python. If you integrate robustly, you may have to incubate intuitively. At Cricket Communications, we understand how to engage transparently. What does it really mean to innovate "extensibly"? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our web-enabled platforms and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and Dynamic HTML. We invariably envisioneer revolutionary 24/7/365 architectures. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! The aptitude to innovate wirelessly leads to the ability to orchestrate globally. We will incubate the term "customized". We will orchestrate the capability of niches to orchestrate. What does the term "project management management" really mean? Your budget for extending should be at least one-half of your budget for implementing. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our bricks-and-clicks, 24/7 architectures but our capacity to integrate. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-half of your budget for revolutionizing. We have proven we know that it is better to productize transparently than to grow compellingly. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "virally-distributed, value-added Total Quality Control". What does the standard industry commonly-used buzzword "sexy" really mean? Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for growing. We will optimize the commonly-used term "distributed". We think that most cutting-edge entry pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XSLT. Our functionality is second to none, but our frictionless M&A and user-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. A company that can incentivize correctly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to synergize courageously. What does the term "social-network-based, virtual, visionary Total Quality Management" really mean? The R&D factor is granular. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our world-class deliverables and easy operation is always considered a terrific achievement. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be six-sigma? The systems factor can be summed up in one word: distributed.