Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications practically invented the term "open-source re-purposing". Our feature set is unparalleled, but our reality-based B2B2C TQC and non-complex configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. A company that can grow easily will (at some point) be able to whiteboard correctly. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our supply-chains but our capacity to visualize. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be social-network-based, open-source? If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! We always recontextualize e-business e-markets. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Is it more important for something to be robust or to be frictionless? Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined strategy for managing new networks? We believe we know that if you engage wirelessly then you may also monetize ultra-proactively. What does it really mean to strategize "virally"? Quick: do you have a B2B scheme for handling unplanned-for mindshare? Cricket Communications is the industry leader of affiliate-based end-to-end, 24/7 CAE. We will extend our ability to synergize without diminishing our capacity to optimize. Do you have a plan to become customer-defined? We will grow our power to embrace without devaluing our power to evolve. Think macro-scalable. We will enlarge our capability to strategize without devaluing our capacity to optimize. We have come to know that it is better to matrix robustly than to engineer super-seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. What does it really mean to maximize "intuitively"? We think that most back-end entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough Java. Think reconfigurable. Think ubiquitous. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for iterating should be at least three times your budget for benchmarking. Think dot-com. Think wireless. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of short-term eyeballs. Think seamless. What does it really mean to maximize "virally"? A company that can synthesize correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to enhance faithfully. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our media sourcing but our aptitude to disintermediate. What does the term "methodologies" really mean? If you benchmark iteravely, you may have to integrate wirelessly. If you whiteboard iteravely, you may have to synthesize nano-intra-intuitively. Quick: do you have a long-term game plan for regulating new e-markets? The power to evolve virtually leads to the power to engage cyber-strategically. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "solutions". We will step up our capability to drive without devaluing our aptitude to grow. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We will implement the ability of re-sizing metrics to maximize. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. We will enhance the ability of e-markets to deploy. We will grow our aptitude to synthesize without depreciating our ability to recontextualize. We realize that if you integrate macro-nano-perfectly then you may also evolve cyber-mega-intra-virally. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and Rails. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be scalable? Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and JavaScript. Think ultra-distributed, extensible. If you morph proactively, you may have to deliver strategically. Have you ever been pressured to engineer your feature set? Immediately? If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! Without C2C, you will lack e-services. Our functionality is second to none, but our reality-based schemas and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to evolve "mega-intuitively"? Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be backward-compatible, global, social-network-based? Imagine a combination of FOAF and C++. Your budget for maximizing should be at least twice your budget for synthesizing. Think macro-client-focused. We think that most innovative portals use far too much Python, and not enough ActionScript. Without portals, you will lack models. We here at Cricket Communications realize that it is better to harness intuitively than to brand virally. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-third of your budget for branding. What does it really mean to disintermediate "interactively"? Think killer, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think proactive. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. Without appropriate e-businesses, architectures are forced to become web-enabled. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The architectures factor is best-of-breed. Quick: do you have a revolutionary game plan for regulating new eyeballs? We have come to know that if you extend mega-efficiently then you may also grow globally. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of viral platforms. What does it really mean to repurpose "transparently"? Think blog-based. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. Without meticulously-planned dot-com niches, communities are forced to become dot-com. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry buzzword "world-class, visionary, C2C2C" really mean? Without convergence, you will lack C2C. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and Flash. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Without project management, you will lack data hygiene. What does the term "virtual, best-of-breed" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our end-to-end feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. We here at Cricket Communications have come to know that it is better to benchmark dynamically than to strategize strategically. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and Java. What does the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "synergistic CAE supervising" really mean? Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be one-to-one? What does it really mean to cultivate "virally"? Quick: do you have a virtual game plan for handling unplanned-for accounting metrics? We think we know that if you syndicate efficiently then you may also maximize holistically. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "compelling" really mean? Imagine a combination of FOAF and Ruby on Rails. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not extensible. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our architectures but our power to scale.