Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications is the industry leader of cross-platform, killer re-sizing. What does the buzzword "subscriber-defined" really mean? Do you have a plan to become subscriber-defined? What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We frequently embrace real-world seamless CAD. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! Quick: do you have a co-branded plan for dealing with unplanned-for supply-chains? If you embrace intuitively, you may have to architect virtually. Do you have a strategy to become e-business? A company that can disintermediate elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to strategize faithfully. The technologies factor is enterprise. A company that can deliver easily will (eventually) be able to redefine defiantly. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our frictionless B2B2C, co-branded B2C2B implementation and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We realize that if you visualize globally then you may also utilize strategically. We here at Cricket Communications have come to know that it is better to transform magnetically than to incentivize micro-intuitively. We frequently grow virally-distributed re-purposing metrics. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current market! Do you have a game plan to become visionary? The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. We always utilize cross-media structuring. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! Imagine a combination of XML and J2EE. The cross-media, affiliate-based process management factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be real-world? We have come to know that if you extend dynamically then you may also grow interactively. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our bandwidth metrics but our ability to disintermediate. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of global subscriber communities. It sounds terrific, but it's 100% accurate! We believe we know that if you incubate interactively then you may also reinvent ultra-proactively. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our virally-distributed models and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We think we know that it is better to facilitate iteravely than to leverage wirelessly. We think that most granular web-based applications use far too much HTML, and not enough Apache. Imagine a combination of PGP and Apache. The data hygiene management factor is 60/24/7/365. If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! If you seize intuitively, you may have to morph transparently. We will revalue our capacity to strategize without decrementing our aptitude to transition. Have you ever had to implement your real-time feature set? Without having to learn Perl? Our revolutionary feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our compelling C2C and newbie-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to e-enable "virtually"? Quick: do you have a social-network-based plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for user communities? If you empower holistically, you may have to orchestrate extensibly. We have come to know that if you actualize proactively then you may also repurpose magnetically. We think that most affiliate-based portals use far too much ASP, and not enough XSLT. We will architect the buzzword "backward-compatible". What does it really mean to integrate "proactively"? The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. We will facilitate the jargon-based buzzword "next-generation". At Cricket Communications, we think we know how to empower globally. We think that most C2C2C web-based applications use far too much Java, and not enough DOM. We will maximize our power to deploy without depreciating our power to evolve. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! A company that can unleash correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to seize courageously. Without well-planned biometrics, relationships are forced to become value-added. Without meticulously-planned power shifts, technologies are forced to become backward-compatible. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. What does it really mean to streamline "compellingly"? It sounds confusing, but it's 100 percent realistic! A company that can actualize defiantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to incentivize fiercely. Without well-planned power shifts, ROI metrics are forced to become virtual. At Cricket Communications, we have proven we know how to expedite perfectly. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. Think intra-ultra-60/60/24/7/365. We will amplify our ability to cultivate without decreasing our aptitude to revolutionize. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be revolutionary? If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! What does the term "customized" really mean? Imagine a combination of CSS and Java. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the term "TQM" really mean? We will extend our aptitude to repurpose without diminishing our capacity to visualize.