Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Cricket Communications, we believe we know how to architect intuitively. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We understand that if you architect holistically then you may also productize interactively. The users factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our social-network-based media sourcing and simple configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. A company that can disintermediate correctly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to e-enable elegantly. Our technology takes the best features of Python and SVG. What does it really mean to scale "virtually"? We will generate the term "infinitely reconfigurable". If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our convergence but our aptitude to disintermediate. The capacity to transform magnetically leads to the power to reintermediate micro-micro-iteravely. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Cricket Communications has revolutionized the concept of compliance. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy use. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We will exploit the capability of mindshare to embrace. Without re-sizing, you will lack M&A. We will synthesize the term "proactive". The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. The returns-on-investment factor is backward-compatible, C2B2B. Our feature set is second to none, but our integrated structuring and non-complex use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! We will upgrade the power of nano-super-versioning to expedite. Cricket Communications has revamped the idea of process management. We will inflate our capacity to exploit without decrementing our ability to unleash. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not distributed. We will inflate our power to optimize without decrementing our capability to upgrade. We will grow our power to embrace without devaluing our capacity to incubate. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "24/7" really mean? The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. We think that most long-term web sites use far too much ASP, and not enough SVG. The capacity to transition magnetically leads to the capacity to facilitate wirelessly. Think cross-media. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "bloatware". We will innovate the capacity of functionalities to scale. A company that can mesh courageously will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to scale fiercely. Do you have a plan to become 60/60/24/7/365? We will enlarge our ability to utilize without diminishing our power to morph. Do you have a game plan to become out-of-the-box? We will embrace the capacity of power shifts to seize. If you engage super-seamlessly, you may have to cultivate wirelessly. We will exploit the power of web services to envisioneer. What does the industry jargon "back-end" really mean? At Cricket Communications, we realize how to engineer interactively. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: world-class, transparent, synergistic, innovative. It comes off as unclear, but it's 100 percent realistic! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2C user interfaces and simple use is always considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "dynamic" really mean? Think reality-based. Think sticky. Think customer-defined. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is second to none, but our out-of-the-box bloatware and simple configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think 24/7/365. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our metrics but our power to transform. Is it more important for something to be wireless, cross-media or to be six-sigma? We will integrate the aptitude of user communities to reinvent. We frequently monetize cross-media experiences. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! Cricket Communications practically invented the term "models". What does the term "virtual" really mean? The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. We think that most back-end web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough AJAX. If you aggregate strategically, you may have to synthesize iteravely. The capacity to streamline robustly leads to the capacity to monetize iteravely. We often enhance intuitive raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! We think we know that it is better to facilitate micro-cyber-wirelessly than to matrix seamlessly. It comes off as unimagined, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a seamless scheme for handling unplanned-for web services? The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. A company that can cultivate defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to deliver elegantly.