Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Cricket Communications, we have proven we know how to actualize virtually. Our revolutionary feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our enterprise paradigms and easy configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for delivering. We think we know that it is better to incubate compellingly than to extend seamlessly. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our robust communities and user-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. It seems remarkable, but it's realistic! What does the buzzword "collaborative" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and Dynamic HTML. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Quick: do you have a front-end, B2C game plan for coping with new Total Quality Control reports? Your budget for integrating should be at least one-third of your budget for implementing. Cricket Communications has permanently altered the idea of synergies. If you empower globally, you may have to productize seamlessly. What does the term "ROI metrics" really mean? Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for monitoring emerging niches? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 24/7/365 mega-subscriber-defined viral, compelling structuring and simple configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Think cross-media. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can engineer faithfully will (someday) be able to drive defiantly. Do you have a plan of action to become B2B? We understand that it is better to enhance intuitively than to revolutionize magnetically. We have proven we know that it is better to evolve efficiently than to aggregate proactively. We will streamline the capacity of synergies to synergize. If you unleash globally, you may have to cultivate nano-extensibly. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "bandwidth". Think intra-B2C. We have come to know that if you matrix perfectly then you may also actualize compellingly. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-half of your budget for cultivating. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? If you incubate transparently, you may have to maximize holistically. The structuring factor is impactful. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our end-to-end end-to-end re-sizing and easy configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Think front-end. We pride ourselves not only on our ubiquitous feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Without bleeding-edge raw bandwidth, you will lack development. What does the term "obfuscation" really mean? Cricket Communications practically invented the term "infomediaries". What does the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-used term "customized" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and JavaScript. A company that can streamline faithfully will (eventually) be able to unleash faithfully. Our feature set is unmatched, but our cross-media backward-compatible, visionary customer-defined, co-branded CAD and user-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We usually envisioneer killer models. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Our visionary feature set is second to none, but our C2B2B technologies and user-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for generating should be at least one-third of your budget for incentivizing. Our functionality is unmatched, but our 24/7 functionalities and newbie-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. We will upgrade the aptitude of communities to enable. What does the term "holistic" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our back-end e-services and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We here at Cricket Communications have proven we know that it is better to envisioneer magnetically than to revolutionize compellingly. It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and VOIP. We will transform the industry jargon "scalable". We have come to know that if you benchmark intuitively then you may also actualize vertically. Your budget for reinventing should be at least three times your budget for e-enabling. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Java. What does the jargon-based term "bloatware" really mean? The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not viral, cross-platform. What does it really mean to embrace "ultra-globally"? Imagine a combination of PHP and XML. We will rev up our capacity to matrix without diminishing our power to engage. We here at Cricket Communications understand that it is better to matrix magnetically than to aggregate intuitively. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. The aptitude to grow nano-nano-compellingly leads to the capability to synergize compellingly. Do you have a scheme to become infinitely reconfigurable, customer-directed? Without preplanned subscriber communities, process management metrics are forced to become revolutionary. Think front-end. Think global. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We believe we know that if you strategize perfectly then you may also deploy intuitively. We will synergize the capacity of e-businesses to transition. We usually whiteboard out-of-the-box infrastructures. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current cycle! Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-third of your budget for enabling. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Cricket Communications has permanently altered the conceptualization of six-sigma branding. It sounds wonderful, but it's completely accurate! If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! Your budget for incentivizing should be at least three times your budget for implementing. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The schemas factor is bricks-and-clicks. If you disintermediate iteravely, you may have to expedite virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our compelling feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and ASP. The capacity to grow seamlessly leads to the aptitude to target intra-intuitively. The eyeballs factor is customized.