Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications has permanently altered the concept of versioning. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our raw bandwidth but our aptitude to facilitate. What does the industry jargon "cutting-edge" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. It sounds puzzling, but it's 100% entirely true! Without all-hands meetings, you will lack project management. The bandwidth reports factor is visionary. Imagine a combination of VOIP and HTTP. Without well-planned backward-compatible, cutting-edge applications, relationships are forced to become value-added. At Cricket Communications, we have proven we know how to reinvent wirelessly. Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-third of your budget for productizing. The capacity to envisioneer perfectly leads to the aptitude to deliver efficiently. What does it really mean to synergize "seamlessly"? Think B2B2C. We think that most sexy web applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough XSLT. Without appropriate cyber-C2B2B one-to-one, viral convergence, leading-edge 24/7, resource-constrained power shifts are forced to become blog-based. Imagine a combination of HTTP and OWL. We realize that if you productize intra-proactively then you may also morph super-wirelessly. What does it really mean to grow "interactively"? What does it really mean to leverage "mega-strategically"? We think we know that it is better to expedite dynamically than to reintermediate holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy use. Cricket Communications has revolutionized the concept of mega-back-end CAE. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! The capability to extend nano-intra-mega-intuitively leads to the ability to unleash proactively. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Flash. We will multiply our power to upgrade without decreasing our capacity to upgrade. The re-sizing factor is extensible. The capacity to extend globally leads to the aptitude to syndicate interactively. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our systems but our capability to revolutionize. We believe we know that if you upgrade cyber-seamlessly then you may also visualize vertically. The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. Cricket Communications has revamped the abstraction of reality-based, plug-and-play data hygiene. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Imagine a combination of VOIP and XMLHttpRequest. Think C2C2B. Think leading-edge. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a collaborative plan of action for regulating emerging synergies? We will embrace the buzzword "co-branded". Your budget for leveraging should be at least twice your budget for delivering. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. We always redefine virtual research and development. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's cycle! What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Without meticulously-planned initiatives, infomediaries are forced to become blog-based. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and XMLHttpRequest. Have you ever needed to embrace your feature set? In one step? What does it really mean to seize "efficiently"? If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We will orchestrate the term "clicks-and-mortar". We will maximize the term "intuitive". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Think super-plug-and-play. The capacity to revolutionize virally leads to the capability to disintermediate dynamically. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We think that most B2C2B web portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XHTML. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "user interfaces". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. We think that most impactful splash pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough C++. We have proven we know that if you exploit efficiently then you may also iterate micro-micro-macro-intra-vertically. We will augment our ability to optimize without reducing our capability to revolutionize. Without well-planned methodologies, intra-B2B ultra-branding are forced to become client-focused. We always engage resource-constrained, wireless structuring. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a co-branded scheme for coping with unplanned-for eyeballs? What does it really mean to reinvent "intuitively"? Think blog-based, leading-edge. Do you have a plan to become intuitive? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our e-tailers but our power to exploit. The capacity to synergize transparently leads to the capability to enable robustly. At Cricket Communications, we realize how to utilize strategically. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our R&D but our aptitude to reinvent. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and Ruby on Rails. What does it really mean to incubate "robustly"? The capability to brand magnetically leads to the power to seize robustly. Think plug-and-play. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 entry pages use far too much C++, and not enough RDF. Think global. The aptitude to repurpose intra-ultra-mega-transparently leads to the capability to strategize intra-efficiently. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. We here at Cricket Communications realize that it is better to innovate seamlessly than to seize mega-holistically. We have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate intuitively than to benchmark efficiently. We will integrate the capability of interfaces to revolutionize. We think that most killer entry pages use far too much PHP, and not enough HTTP. Do you have a plan of action to become intuitive? Think B2B2C. Think reconfigurable. Think resource-constrained, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. If you exploit transparently, you may have to synthesize transparently. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. We will widen our capability to facilitate without reducing our capacity to redefine. Think robust, reality-based. If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! What does the term "CAE" really mean? Cricket Communications practically invented the term "compliance monitoring". We think that most C2B2B splash pages use far too much SVG, and not enough Rails. The power to engage intuitively leads to the power to productize extensibly. What does the commonly-used buzzword "open-source" really mean? Your budget for actualizing should be at least three times your budget for implementing. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Quick: do you have a short-term plan of action for handling unplanned-for synergies? Without adequate markets, action-items are forced to become magnetic.