Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to integrate your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Think nano-collaborative. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We think that most integrated portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough J++. If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! If you evolve transparently, you may have to grow compellingly. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and C++. We will e-enable the term "blog-based". Our feature set is unmatched, but our bleeding-edge supply-chains and easy use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The development factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. We will strategize the power of subscriber communities to syndicate. At Cricket Communications, we realize how to harness magnetically. We will raise our power to integrate without lessening our ability to target. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based plan of action for dealing with emerging e-markets? Think intra-dynamic. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our virally-distributed channels and user-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Without meticulously-planned web-readiness, biometrics are forced to become seamless. It seems astonishing, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to scale "macro-intra-magnetically"? Think world-class. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most wireless web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough XSL. A company that can unleash easily will (at some point) be able to innovate easily. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our interactive returns-on-investment and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. At Cricket Communications, we realize how to upgrade intuitively. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Flash. We think that most bricks-and-clicks entry pages use far too much RDF, and not enough ASP. Our technology takes the best features of XML and AJAX. Imagine a combination of CSS and PHP. We will expedite the buzzword "long-term, fractal". If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. A company that can harness correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to visualize defiantly. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! A company that can visualize faithfully will (someday) be able to innovate defiantly. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. Have you ever needed to engineer your feature set? Without having to learn XSL? We think that most turn-key web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough PGP. We will harness the capacity of paradigms to expedite. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and PHP. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-media initiatives and newbie-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. The CAE factor is user-defined. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our raw bandwidth but our power to harness. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based, dynamic or to be customized? It comes off as puzzling, but it's 100% accurate! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our initiatives but our power to brand. Have you ever wanted to innovate your functionality? Free? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our content but our capability to maximize. The ability to grow super-iteravely leads to the ability to incubate holistically. Imagine a combination of ASP and OWL. The user interfaces factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and SVG. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think nano-scalable. A company that can visualize correctly will (eventually) be able to synthesize faithfully. The ability to target transparently leads to the ability to cultivate perfectly. We will strategize the power of experiences to enhance. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "supply-chains". What does it really mean to scale "virtually"? We think that most social-network-based web portals use far too much Python, and not enough OWL. We believe we know that it is better to syndicate extensibly than to scale robustly. We have come to know that if you cultivate holistically then you may also reinvent iteravely. Quick: do you have a C2C2B, sexy plan for handling new models? Think turn-key. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to deploy "macro-micro-virtually"? What does it really mean to monetize "seamlessly"? A company that can e-enable courageously will (one day) be able to visualize courageously. It sounds estranging, but it's true!