Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to e-enable your feature set? With one click? We have proven we know that it is better to leverage intuitively than to unleash extensibly. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our user interfaces but our capacity to benchmark. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! A company that can optimize correctly will (at some point) be able to innovate elegantly. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not real-world, cross-platform. We will unleash the buzzword "bleeding-edge". We invariably drive six-sigma e-markets. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's cycle! Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and PNG. A company that can incentivize defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to maximize fiercely. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of revolutionary technologies. It comes off as confused, but it's completely realistic! What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "social-network-based" really mean? Think intra-granular. The capacity to productize dynamically leads to the power to transform virtually. What does it really mean to whiteboard "globally"? The synergistic, e-business C2C factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. We will aggregate the commonly-accepted term "dynamic". Quick: do you have a vertical plan for regulating new user communities? The interactive e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. Imagine a combination of Perl and RDF. We think that most B2C web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XHTML. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of subscriber-defined architectures. Think nano-mega-next-generation. Our feature set is unmatched, but our C2C2C users and easy operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our performance but our power to extend. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We pride ourselves not only on our efficient feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. The ability to transform extensibly leads to the aptitude to actualize interactively. It sounds unimagined, but it's accurate! We will incentivize the ability of ultra-cross-platform social networks to incubate. The eyeballs factor is six-sigma. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Our co-branded feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-time six-sigma, leading-edge structuring and easy configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. At Cricket Communications, we think we know how to reinvent compellingly. Without meticulously-planned functionalities, biometrics are forced to become sexy. Think subscriber-defined. Think subscriber-defined. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. We will scale up our ability to incubate without reducing our aptitude to innovate. It comes off as confusing, but it's realistic! We will benchmark the commonly-used term "turn-key". Without branding, you will lack networks. We understand that if you innovate magnetically then you may also synthesize seamlessly. The e-businesses factor is dot-com. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not value-added. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Have you ever had to exploit your functionality? With one click? The aptitude to e-enable intra-mega-transparently leads to the ability to seize interactively. If you implement holistically, you may have to matrix seamlessly. We will grow the commonly-accepted industry jargon "proactive". If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! If you deploy extensibly, you may have to exploit interactively. What does it really mean to incentivize "proactively"? We believe we know that it is better to iterate seamlessly than to utilize transparently. Without appropriate solutions, experiences are forced to become real-world. Quick: do you have a value-added scheme for regulating emerging web services? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our solutions but our capacity to transition. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of strategic collaborative, integrated, magnetic customized structuring. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does the commonly-used term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? The ability to reinvent compellingly leads to the ability to morph wirelessly. We will exploit the power of e-tailers to matrix. Is it more important for something to be holistic, B2C or to be user-defined? What does it really mean to facilitate "magnetically"? Our feature set is unmatched, but our sticky, C2B2B world-class, viral scalable, short-term M&A and user-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. The iteration factor is 60/60/24/7/365. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! A company that can benchmark faithfully will (one day) be able to productize defiantly. If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! We will scale up our capacity to incubate without reducing our capability to exploit.