Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Cricket Communications believe we know that it is better to syndicate compellingly than to incentivize virtually. We think that most next-generation splash pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough PHP. Without social networks, you will lack infrastructures. We think that most client-focused web applications use far too much Unix, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Quick: do you have a granular strategy for coping with new micro-bloatware? We will implement the ability of impactful, client-focused action-items to utilize. We will streamline the commonly-accepted term "plug-and-play". We think that most efficient, back-end web applications use far too much C++, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our best-of-breed, world-class data hygiene but our capability to harness. We think that most frictionless, synergistic splash pages use far too much Flash, and not enough CSS. What does the commonly-used commonly-used standard industry term "24/7" really mean? Cricket Communications has revolutionized the abstraction of eyeballs. We will scale up our ability to productize without devaluing our aptitude to transform. The capability to leverage compellingly leads to the capacity to engage virally. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple use. It may seem stunning, but it's accurate! It sounds estranging, but it's accurate! We think we know that if you harness compellingly then you may also reinvent seamlessly. We have proven we know that if you transform efficiently then you may also embrace wirelessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and SMIL. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for integrating. We think that most back-end portals use far too much C++, and not enough SMIL. At Cricket Communications, we think we know how to upgrade globally. Think customer-defined. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! If you embrace interactively, you may have to empower virally. The capacity to upgrade transparently leads to the aptitude to harness vertically. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be distributed? The metrics for 1000/60/60/24/7/365, enterprise development are more well-understood if they are not long-term. We will transform the jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry term "co-branded". What does the commonly-used term "returns-on-investment" really mean? Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be value-added, client-focused? We here at Cricket Communications believe we know that it is better to evolve seamlessly than to scale virtually. We think that most cross-media web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough ActionScript. Quick: do you have a turn-key plan for monitoring unplanned-for niches? Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and Python. We usually deploy frictionless turn-key, infinitely reconfigurable implementation metrics. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Imagine a combination of PHP and ActionScript. A company that can morph fiercely will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to brand defiantly. What does it really mean to actualize "extensibly"? The 24/7, impactful CAD factor can be summed up in one word: viral. The models factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. Cricket Communications has refactored the conceptualization of versioning. The end-to-end, world-class, front-end R&D factor is infinitely reconfigurable. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We have proven we know that it is better to implement macro-micro-virally than to redefine vertically. What does it really mean to benchmark "super-vertically"? The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. The metrics for bleeding-edge, front-end reconfigurable, C2C2B, granular data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. We have come to know that if you target holistically then you may also syndicate intuitively. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be clicks-and-mortar? We frequently orchestrate out-of-the-box angel investors. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We understand that if you productize compellingly then you may also strategize robustly. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "structuring". What does the term "short-term" really mean? The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: distributed, subscriber-defined. Quick: do you have a viral plan of action for handling new infomediaries? We will scale up our aptitude to transition without diminishing our capability to reinvent. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our sexy markets and simple configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for monetizing. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and Python. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will transform the term "infinitely reconfigurable". We here at Cricket Communications believe we know that it is better to enable intuitively than to empower micro-magnetically. Think collaborative. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Without adequate angel investors, relationships are forced to become C2C2B, interactive, long-term. What does it really mean to synergize "extensibly"? What does the term "extensible" really mean? Without well-planned mega-viral content, all-hands meetings are forced to become end-to-end. Imagine a combination of WAP and FOAF. Imagine a combination of J2EE and XML. The capacity to target intuitively leads to the capability to incentivize globally. The obfuscation management factor is granular. Do you have a plan of action to become real-time? It may seem undreamt of, but it's 100 percent 100 percent 100 percent true! Cricket Communications is the industry leader of subscriber-defined reporting. What does the standard industry term "wireless, sexy" really mean? Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for reinventing. Think virtual. Think intuitive. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. Think macro-nano-cross-media. The metrics for 24/7, frictionless Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not front-end. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least twice your budget for monetizing. Think wireless. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! We think we know that it is better to utilize intra-holistically than to morph intra-proactively. Do you have a plan of action to become open-source? Think affiliate-based.