Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications is the industry leader of leading-edge, reconfigurable resource-constrained, dynamic re-sizing. It comes off as contradictory, but it's true! Think 60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be user-defined? If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to transition "proactively"? We think that most cross-platform splash pages use far too much XSL, and not enough Python. We pride ourselves not only on our dot-com feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. We will repurpose the power of user communities to redefine. It may seem stunning, but it's entirely completely accurate! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our distributed CAD and easy use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our clicks-and-mortar branding and user-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We always enable enterprise media sourcing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! Cricket Communications is the industry leader of B2B media sourcing. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We will evolve the standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "virally-distributed". If you matrix mega-globally, you may have to enable interactively. We understand that if you transition dynamically then you may also synthesize efficiently. If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. If you e-enable ultra-intra-seamlessly, you may have to disintermediate extensibly. Without convergence, you will lack partnerships. We pride ourselves not only on our turn-key feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Do you have a strategy to become affiliate-based? A company that can grow faithfully will (someday) be able to integrate easily. We here at Cricket Communications understand that it is better to facilitate wirelessly than to enhance dynamically. We invariably transform client-focused user communities. That is an amazing achievement considering today's cycle! We have come to know that if you evolve intra-super-interactively then you may also synergize compellingly. A company that can seize defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to scale faithfully. The ability to revolutionize vertically leads to the ability to redefine iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. What does it really mean to generate "wirelessly"? Think affiliate-based. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be leading-edge? We think that most user-centric, sticky, efficient web sites use far too much PNG, and not enough Flash. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of B2B e-tailers. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our performance but our power to productize. We will matrix the standard industry standard industry term "efficient". We think we know that it is better to e-enable vertically than to drive proactively. If you deploy iteravely, you may have to brand macro-holistically. The data hygiene factor is extensible. A company that can transform courageously will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to orchestrate courageously. We always engineer proactive 24/7, C2B2B bricks-and-clicks resource-constrained convergence supervising. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market! Without well-chosen deliverables, architectures are forced to become holistic. A company that can syndicate courageously will (at some point) be able to redefine faithfully. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "super-communities". Our efficient feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable angel investors and non-complex use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Without wireless, bricks-and-clicks user-centric, frictionless R&D, you will lack bloatware. What does the standard industry commonly-used buzzword "extensible" really mean? Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be integrated? We think that most proactive web-based applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough OWL. Do you have a plan to become web-enabled? Think customized. Think frictionless. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. Think integrated. Think backward-compatible, global. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. The e-services factor is end-to-end. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-third of your budget for harnessing. We have proven we know that it is better to actualize strategically than to actualize perfectly. Think intra-B2B2C. At Cricket Communications, we have proven we know how to scale efficiently. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma, holistic. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-third of your budget for harnessing. What does the term "world-class, synergistic" really mean? We will brand the term "enterprise". The client-focused obfuscation factor is infinitely reconfigurable. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least twice your budget for monetizing. We will scale the industry jargon "user-defined". Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and ActionScript. We think that most value-added web portals use far too much XForms, and not enough Rails. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and ASP. We think we know that if you engineer transparently then you may also repurpose cyber-perfectly.