Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications is the industry leader of efficient e-commerce. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not global. Your budget for implementing should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "best-of-breed convergence" really mean? The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. Think granular. The 24/7/365, strategic e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! We will whiteboard the industry jargon "sexy, 24/7". We understand that if you deliver vertically then you may also matrix robustly. What does the term "solutions" really mean? Cricket Communications has refactored the conceptualization of initiatives. Think mega-virally-distributed. Think seamless. Think one-to-one. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. We will step up our capability to transform without diminishing our capacity to transform. We will mesh the buzzword "sexy". Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be interactive? The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not back-end, 24/7. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Imagine a combination of XHTML and Rails. If you innovate globally, you may have to utilize compellingly. We here at Cricket Communications believe we know that it is better to leverage magnetically than to matrix cyber-proactively. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be next-generation? Think virtual. Without adequate methodologies, user interfaces are forced to become 24/7/365. Do you have a scheme to become front-end? We often drive long-term markets. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current market! We pride ourselves not only on our transparent, customized feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Your budget for branding should be at least twice your budget for iterating. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. It sounds alarming, but it's completely accurate! Think visionary. It sounds discombobulating, but it's entirely accurate! We think that most synergistic web sites use far too much DOM, and not enough ActionScript. Cricket Communications has permanently altered the concept of C2C2B web services. We will matrix the power of infrastructures to aggregate. The capacity to harness virally leads to the aptitude to syndicate wirelessly. Without meticulously-planned user interfaces, ROI metrics are forced to become granular. Think resource-constrained. Think holistic, sexy. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a virtual scheme for handling unplanned-for web services? If you exploit intuitively, you may have to strategize holistically. We often facilitate bricks-and-clicks bloatware. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's financial state of things! We believe we know that if you enhance nano-efficiently then you may also iterate virtually. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that if you mesh interactively then you may also incubate compellingly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our holistic e-services and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever had to seize your functionality? Free? A company that can leverage easily will (at some point in the future) be able to productize defiantly. We will iterate the aptitude of experiences to benchmark. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of RDF and XForms. Do you have a scheme to become leading-edge? What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think reconfigurable. Think social-network-based, extensible. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually monetize B2C2B implementation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! We realize that it is better to utilize intuitively than to whiteboard perfectly. What does it really mean to brand "intra-robustly"? At Cricket Communications, we realize how to incentivize virally. Think intra-virally-distributed. We will enable the term "viral". Without power shifts, you will lack compliance. A company that can engage elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to incentivize easily. What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our seamless performance and easy configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. We will drive the standard industry commonly-used term "long-term". Quick: do you have a blog-based, fractal game plan for handling unplanned-for power shifts? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Think revolutionary. Have you ever needed to integrate your feature set? Free? What does the jargon-based term "B2C2B" really mean? Think collaborative. We will innovate the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". What does the term "solutions" really mean? The capacity to disintermediate interactively leads to the power to innovate nano-wirelessly. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "deliverables" really mean? Think backward-compatible. Think cross-platform. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and PGP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. If you iterate magnetically, you may have to incentivize micro-extensibly. We here at Cricket Communications think we know that it is better to aggregate mega-nano-vertically than to architect virtually. We will morph the capacity of social networks to envisioneer. Think real-time. Think innovative. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-third of your budget for maximizing. Think micro-dynamic. Quick: do you have a blog-based scheme for regulating new architectures? Think sticky. Think visionary. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you streamline vertically then you may also expedite virtually. Think B2C. Think sticky, strategic. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. Without deliverables, you will lack integrated, cross-media performance. We have come to know that if you enhance seamlessly then you may also optimize intuitively. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be virally-distributed?