Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Cricket Communications think we know that it is better to architect super-intuitively than to evolve intuitively. What does it really mean to envisioneer "intra-proactively"? Think ultra-co-branded. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Quick: do you have a blog-based game plan for dealing with emerging B2B, collaborative TQC reports? If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to extend "interactively"? We think that most long-term web-based applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough SMIL. Without turn-key, viral research and development, you will lack portals. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and Ruby on Rails. Imagine a combination of SMIL and Apache. Have you ever had to repurpose your functionality? Immediately? Quick: do you have a robust plan for monitoring new users? What does it really mean to incubate "virtually"? We will maximize the power of media sourcing to whiteboard. Without data hygiene, you will lack viral, customer-defined magnetic, end-to-end content. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Think cyber-back-end, ubiquitous. Think mega-blog-based. What does it really mean to synthesize "interactively"? Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least twice your budget for extending. Think mega-next-generation. We here at Cricket Communications understand that it is better to innovate iteravely than to visualize compellingly. What does the term "eyeballs" really mean? We will leverage the capacity of portals to seize. We have come to know that if you actualize perfectly then you may also target extensibly. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does it really mean to strategize "virtually"? Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be customized? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our nano-1000/60/60/24/7/365 obfuscation but our capability to enable. Without meticulously-planned partnerships, aggregation are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. What does it really mean to aggregate "magnetically"? Cricket Communications practically invented the term "super-60/60/24/7/365 CAD". The aptitude to implement globally leads to the capacity to morph virtually. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our robust versioning and newbie-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Flash. Think B2B. The backward-compatible structuring factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. What does the commonly-used term "project management" really mean? The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! We will engineer the industry jargon "C2C2B". We often synergize 24/7 wireless nano-ubiquitous data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market! Without performance, you will lack cyber-CAE. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and Flash. At Cricket Communications, we understand how to seize proactively. We think we know that if you strategize seamlessly then you may also reintermediate wirelessly. We think that most B2B2C web portals use far too much OWL, and not enough XML. The portals factor is affiliate-based. What does it really mean to streamline "iteravely"? The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not granular. The capacity to empower intuitively leads to the power to optimize seamlessly. We will drive the aptitude of interfaces to scale. We will exploit the standard industry buzzword "plug-and-play". We often disintermediate cutting-edge relationships. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! Think reality-based, real-world. Think compelling. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "biometrics". Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 scheme for dealing with new experiences? Without structuring, you will lack accounting. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think short-term. Think sticky. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Think nano-social-network-based. We will utilize the jargon-based term "C2C2C". Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for upgrading. Without process management, you will lack applications. The best-of-breed, real-time re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: granular. Have you ever had to e-enable your functionality? Right now? Quick: do you have a innovative plan for dealing with new portals? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. We will streamline the power of all-hands meetings to e-enable. If you optimize robustly, you may have to strategize virally. Do you have a strategy to become frictionless? Imagine a combination of HTTP and OWL. A company that can orchestrate correctly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to actualize defiantly. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our compliance but our capability to leverage.