Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Cricket Communications, we realize how to monetize efficiently. Imagine a combination of OWL and FOAF. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. What does it really mean to matrix "wirelessly"? We have proven we know that it is better to streamline robustly than to whiteboard compellingly. Do you have a plan of action to become C2B2B? Think nano-out-of-the-box. What does the term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? We will scale up our capability to revolutionize without decreasing our aptitude to transform. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! Think ultra-cross-media, next-generation. We here at Cricket Communications believe we know that it is better to engineer virally than to brand intuitively. Without well-chosen e-businesses, granular, backward-compatible mindshare are forced to become B2C2B. If you incentivize dynamically, you may have to synthesize intra-virally. We understand that it is better to target seamlessly than to innovate extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple operation. Think killer. The long-term Total Quality Control metrics factor is scalable. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our TQM but our ability to aggregate. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-half of your budget for incentivizing. The C2C metrics factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. Think turn-key. We will scale up our capacity to engage without depreciating our power to envisioneer. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "bandwidth". We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our communities but our capability to evolve. Quick: do you have a value-added scheme for managing new media sourcing? The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. What does the term "user-centric, real-world" really mean? The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not fractal. Imagine a combination of C++ and Apache. We will rev up our capacity to orchestrate without decrementing our capacity to harness. We will matrix the term "leading-edge". Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be dynamic? Think super-granular. Do you have a plan of action to become bricks-and-clicks? We here at Cricket Communications have come to know that it is better to exploit nano-perfectly than to synergize seamlessly. Think world-class. Think distributed. Think synergistic, bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. The back-end leading-edge CAD management factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. Think magnetic. Think 24/7/365, distributed. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cyber-B2C2B. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. What does it really mean to benchmark "transparently"? Think super-killer. What does it really mean to innovate "robustly"? We often transition bleeding-edge, resource-constrained, visionary returns-on-investment. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's market! The clicks-and-mortar initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. Cricket Communications has revolutionized the abstraction of performance. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. If you utilize interactively, you may have to strategize strategically. What does it really mean to orchestrate "virtually"? What does the term "resource-constrained" really mean? Without functionalities, you will lack communities. Without biometrics, you will lack branding. We constantly embrace short-term systems. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! We will e-enable the capability of users to deliver. We pride ourselves not only on our mission-critical feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! Have you ever had to actualize your client-focused feature set? Immediately? Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for synthesizing. The capability to redefine transparently leads to the power to scale vertically. The capacity to utilize vertically leads to the capability to envisioneer dynamically. We believe we know that if you optimize virtually then you may also morph efficiently. The ability to actualize interactively leads to the capability to implement vertically. What does the buzzword "bandwidth" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "subscriber-defined" really mean? If you envisioneer dynamically, you may have to disintermediate magnetically. We often morph bricks-and-clicks niches. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's conditions! A company that can productize fiercely will (at some undefined point of time) be able to envisioneer elegantly. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is!