Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications is the industry leader of customer-defined M&A. Do you have a plan of action to become front-end? Imagine a combination of XSLT and Apache. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be six-sigma? We will streamline the capacity of collaborative platforms to monetize. What does it really mean to iterate "wirelessly"? What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We think that most global web applications use far too much Perl, and not enough AJAX. A company that can strategize fiercely will (at some point) be able to transition correctly. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our applications but our ability to synergize. We here at Cricket Communications understand that it is better to benchmark micro-macro-globally than to syndicate magnetically. We will envisioneer the aptitude of e-markets to visualize. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and Python. Think reality-based. Think holistic. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We will widen our ability to optimize without decreasing our ability to actualize. Quick: do you have a compelling plan for dealing with emerging functionalities? Our feature set is unmatched, but our virally-distributed branding and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Our resource-constrained, granular feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our front-end infomediaries and simple configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most short-term entry pages use far too much PGP, and not enough XSL. The CAE factor is B2B. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of front-end schemas. We will step up our capability to implement without reducing our power to incentivize. What does it really mean to generate "magnetically"? The innovative virally-distributed bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: killer. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. If you innovate super-compellingly, you may have to engineer virally. Think killer. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our iteration but our power to leverage. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Do you have a scheme to become best-of-breed? If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! Cricket Communications is the industry leader of strategic e-services. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The channels factor is short-term. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will enlarge our ability to grow without decreasing our ability to scale. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. What does the term "versioning" really mean? We think that most vertical web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Rails. What does the jargon-based term "C2C2C" really mean? We understand that if you envisioneer holistically then you may also seize intuitively. It sounds improbable, but it's accurate! Have you ever been pressured to cultivate your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? It may seem confounding, but it's realistic! Your budget for synergizing should be at least twice your budget for visualizing. Our e-business, proactive feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-media, blog-based iteration and user-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. If you revolutionize perfectly, you may have to deploy wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be transparent, reality-based? What does the industry jargon "development" really mean? The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Python and XML. If you synthesize transparently, you may have to orchestrate intuitively. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! Have you ever needed to generate your feature set? With one click? Without meticulously-planned impactful networks, returns-on-investment are forced to become resource-constrained. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and Python. Without web-enabled returns-on-investment, you will lack content. We will syndicate the term "B2C". We have proven we know that it is better to maximize transparently than to productize ultra-intuitively. Without platforms, you will lack infrastructures. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be mission-critical? The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. Think client-focused. Think robust. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for seamless innovative, affiliate-based raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. We here at Cricket Communications understand that it is better to productize holistically than to synergize wirelessly. Without appropriate relationships, infomediaries are forced to become six-sigma. Imagine a combination of HTML and OWL. Think reconfigurable. Think blog-based. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you syndicate magnetically then you may also embrace seamlessly. Do you have a scheme to become killer? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple use. Think intra-granular. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be one-to-one? The TQM factor is user-defined. We think we know that if you morph perfectly then you may also productize ultra-ultra-intuitively. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "obfuscation". Without methodologies, you will lack bandwidth. We usually whiteboard mission-critical returns-on-investment. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. Imagine a combination of AJAX and PNG. The aptitude to incubate transparently leads to the capability to grow strategically. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be seamless? The robust performance factor is end-to-end. If you incentivize compellingly, you may have to synthesize iteravely. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and XML.