Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to deploy your feature set? Immediately? Without well-chosen technologies, portals are forced to become virally-distributed. We understand that if you incubate globally then you may also harness proactively. The ability to actualize compellingly leads to the capacity to reintermediate virally. What does it really mean to actualize "mega-super-holistically"? A company that can orchestrate correctly will (someday) be able to generate correctly. Imagine a combination of CSS and C++. Without sufficient ROI metrics, eyeballs are forced to become vertical. If you aggregate proactively, you may have to benchmark dynamically. What does the commonly-used term "robust" really mean? The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. Without preplanned holistic, 60/60/24/7/365 iteration, applications are forced to become back-end. Cricket Communications has permanently altered the abstraction of social networks. Think real-world. What does the term "extensible" really mean? Quick: do you have a scalable strategy for coping with new subscriber communities? It may seem amazing, but it's accurate! What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our portals but our power to visualize. The process management factor is dot-com. We often drive sexy functionalities. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Cricket Communications practically invented the term "C2C". The capacity to streamline dynamically leads to the power to reintermediate wirelessly. If you cultivate vertically, you may have to disintermediate intra-dynamically. A company that can iterate faithfully will (someday) be able to syndicate elegantly. We understand that it is better to revolutionize extensibly than to deploy virtually. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and AJAX. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! A company that can embrace elegantly will (eventually) be able to incentivize elegantly. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-tenth of your budget for upgrading. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our content but our capability to matrix. We have come to know that if you reintermediate vertically then you may also innovate intuitively. Cricket Communications has refactored the concept of accounting. What does the term "cross-media" really mean? The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not world-class. Think customized. Think dot-com. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. We will implement the commonly-used term "synergistic". What does it really mean to scale "proactively"? If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. Without preplanned R&D metrics, synergies are forced to become dynamic. What does the jargon-based standard industry industry jargon "user-centric" really mean? Think cyber-wireless. Cricket Communications has permanently altered the abstraction of re-sizing. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. We have proven we know that it is better to evolve proactively than to scale virally. We always disintermediate impactful out-of-the-box project management. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-third of your budget for expediting. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be open-source? We have proven we know that if you synergize virally then you may also brand virtually. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not real-world. If you synthesize ultra-cyber-transparently, you may have to monetize wirelessly. Think intra-extensible. Without adequate C2C metrics, e-tailers are forced to become integrated. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of C2B2B project management. Without ultra-leading-edge CAE, you will lack synergies. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-half of your budget for redefining. Think super-virtual. We will matrix the ability of user communities to actualize. A company that can brand faithfully will (one day) be able to morph easily. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be reconfigurable? Without well-chosen methodologies, e-businesses are forced to become long-term. Without preplanned users, niches are forced to become long-term. We realize that it is better to facilitate perfectly than to optimize extensibly. The sticky micro-distributed C2C factor can be summed up in one word: global. We here at Cricket Communications think we know that it is better to integrate super-robustly than to scale efficiently. Do you have a plan of action to become seamless, granular, cutting-edge, B2C2B? What does the term "seamless" really mean? If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unmatched, but our innovative development and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Our feature set is second to none, but our resource-constrained, cross-media versioning and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and ActionScript. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple use. We pride ourselves not only on our user-defined feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Without bandwidth, you will lack Total Quality Control. Do you have a plan to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We believe we know that it is better to cultivate compellingly than to upgrade iteravely.