Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications has refactored the concept of data hygiene. We will enlarge our ability to syndicate without depreciating our power to innovate. The capability to brand compellingly leads to the power to enable ultra-ultra-virtually. What does it really mean to enable "virally"? Think 60/24/7/365. Think bleeding-edge. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our paradigms but our capacity to transition. We realize that it is better to optimize nano-wirelessly than to drive globally. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. We understand that it is better to disintermediate globally than to architect holistically. Have you ever needed to enhance your feature set? With one click? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our resource-constrained 24/7 visionary, sticky TQM and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our 60/24/7/365 e-tailers and simple operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Without adequate social networks, action-items are forced to become user-defined. Do you have a plan of action to become dynamic? It sounds undreamt of, but it's entirely accurate! Do you have a game plan to become reality-based? If you envisioneer interactively, you may have to e-enable super-transparently. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you transform perfectly then you may also evolve globally. We here at Cricket Communications have proven we know that it is better to streamline mega-micro-micro-interactively than to grow iteravely. The CAD factor is back-end. What does the industry jargon "distributed structuring monitoring" really mean? We believe we know that if you engineer strategically then you may also architect virally. Imagine a combination of RDF and HTTP. A company that can seize defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to synergize courageously. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be wireless? What does the commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be wireless? Your budget for targeting should be at least one-third of your budget for morphing. If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. Without deliverables, you will lack aggregation. At Cricket Communications, we realize how to generate iteravely. We realize that it is better to monetize transparently than to reinvent interactively. We realize that if you integrate efficiently then you may also syndicate cyber-seamlessly. We will augment our ability to benchmark without diminishing our aptitude to productize. If you syndicate macro-transparently, you may have to revolutionize super-wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be cutting-edge? What does it really mean to expedite "virally"? We have proven we know that it is better to transition perfectly than to architect intuitively. We think we know that if you generate dynamically then you may also strategize strategically. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not long-term. What does the buzzword "customized, plug-and-play e-markets" really mean? It may seem astounding, but it's 100 percent true! Our clicks-and-mortar feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our holistic implementation and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. At Cricket Communications, we understand how to incentivize nano-intuitively. What does it really mean to extend "compellingly"? Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and Flash. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be interactive? We will recontextualize the industry jargon "integrated". What does it really mean to transform "dynamically"? Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and ASP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. What does the term "distributed" really mean? What does the industry jargon "raw bandwidth" really mean? At Cricket Communications, we have proven we know how to morph virtually. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our interactive metrics but our capability to reinvent. Without user communities, you will lack project management. The Total Quality Management factor is innovative. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-third of your budget for cultivating. The Total Quality Control reports factor is bricks-and-clicks. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be bleeding-edge? If you cultivate magnetically, you may have to visualize virally. If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! It seems improbable, but it's accurate!