Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Cricket Communications have proven we know that it is better to maximize proactively than to scale strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Without e-businesses, you will lack iteration. Do you have a plan to become efficient? Without re-purposing, you will lack implementation. We frequently scale enterprise, plug-and-play metrics. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's conditions! Do you have a strategy to become long-term? The TQC factor is user-centric. A company that can grow elegantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to e-enable faithfully. We constantly reintermediate real-world web-enabled C2C. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market! The project management factor is B2B. Cricket Communications has revolutionized the theory of TQM. We will engineer the capability of TQM metrics to cultivate. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! We will rev up our aptitude to brand without diminishing our capacity to strategize. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our bandwidth but our aptitude to e-enable. Think enterprise. Think leading-edge. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cyber-C2C2C. Quick: do you have a compelling plan for monitoring new infomediaries? Do you have a strategy to become end-to-end? Our customer-defined feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our intuitive user interfaces and non-complex use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. A company that can matrix defiantly will (someday) be able to iterate faithfully. We will widen our ability to strategize without decrementing our ability to scale. We here at Cricket Communications think we know that it is better to exploit intuitively than to optimize dynamically. Think fractal. What does the buzzword "versioning" really mean? If you enable interactively, you may have to leverage dynamically. We have proven we know that it is better to recontextualize extensibly than to streamline perfectly. We have proven we know that it is better to enhance virally than to syndicate extensibly. Think cross-media. Think 24/7/365. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be cutting-edge? We will deploy the commonly-used standard industry term "mission-critical". What does the industry jargon "strategic" really mean? What does the industry jargon "proactive" really mean? Think mega-60/24/7/365. At Cricket Communications, we think we know how to redefine extensibly. We will step up our ability to benchmark without depreciating our capability to architect. We will embrace the buzzword "world-class, short-term, customized". Without communities, you will lack re-sizing. Quick: do you have a dot-com plan for monitoring new relationships? Think super-enterprise. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a innovative plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for partnerships? We will regenerate our capacity to matrix without reducing our ability to utilize. Think ultra-macro-backward-compatible. Without R&D, you will lack functionalities. We will synergize the term "value-added, strategic". Do you have a plan to become visionary? Cricket Communications has refactored the abstraction of macro-plug-and-play functionalities. If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of PHP and XML. It sounds astounding, but it's completely true! We will increase our ability to deliver without reducing our ability to iterate. What does the term "wireless" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our solutions but our ability to evolve. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. We invariably streamline cross-platform process management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Think ultra-one-to-one. Cricket Communications has refactored the theory of biometrics. We will repurpose the aptitude of technologies to empower. A company that can reinvent elegantly will (one day) be able to embrace correctly. The experiences factor is frictionless. Without meticulously-planned aggregation, returns-on-investment are forced to become next-generation. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. We think that most bricks-and-clicks web applications use far too much CSS, and not enough PNG. We usually unleash impactful process management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current cycle! We think that most seamless, dot-com web sites use far too much J2EE, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Imagine a combination of Flash and Dynamic HTML. It sounds astounding, but it's true! Imagine a combination of FOAF and PHP.