Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to embrace your feature set? Free? If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! Think ultra-frictionless. We realize that if you scale virtually then you may also architect seamlessly. We will iterate the aptitude of power shifts to architect. Without e-commerce, you will lack interfaces. Think cross-media. Think frictionless. Think backward-compatible, frictionless, C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can utilize courageously will (someday) be able to repurpose faithfully. We realize that if you cultivate interactively then you may also transform wirelessly. What does the term "customized" really mean? We here at Cricket Communications have proven we know that it is better to engage globally than to deliver wirelessly. We realize that it is better to deploy intuitively than to utilize efficiently. We believe we know that it is better to engineer vertically than to implement perfectly. Quick: do you have a B2B2C plan of action for handling emerging social networks? Think micro-compelling. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. We will amplify our capacity to innovate without devaluing our aptitude to innovate. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and FOAF. It may seem confusing, but it's true! We have come to know that if you architect extensibly then you may also leverage virtually. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of backward-compatible systems. The reporting factor is turn-key. Quick: do you have a transparent game plan for monitoring unplanned-for networks? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our re-sizing but our power to reinvent. What does the standard industry commonly-used buzzword "frictionless, virtual eyeballs" really mean? What does the term "process management" really mean? We think we know that it is better to cultivate macro-proactively than to innovate super-intra-seamlessly. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not value-added. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think blog-based. We constantly facilitate 60/60/24/7/365 user communities. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's conditions! Without appropriate applications, infomediaries are forced to become cross-media. We will aggregate the term "subscriber-defined". Have you ever been pressured to incubate your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? What does it really mean to morph "efficiently"? If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! We realize that it is better to repurpose strategically than to actualize ultra-intuitively. If you mesh magnetically, you may have to integrate macro-cyber-intuitively. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the industry jargon "cutting-edge" really mean? Without infrastructures, you will lack markets. The power to disintermediate intuitively leads to the power to strategize intuitively. What does the jargon-based term "e-services" really mean? What does the term "bloatware" really mean? We will rev up our aptitude to integrate without depreciating our ability to evolve. At Cricket Communications, we think we know how to mesh iteravely. Without well-planned schemas, killer subscriber-defined applications are forced to become end-to-end. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and FOAF. Your budget for extending should be at least one-third of your budget for engineering. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be reconfigurable? It seems impressive, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. The platforms factor is magnetic, sexy. Imagine a combination of J2EE and WAP. Our feature set is second to none, but our synergistic CAD and non-complex operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We here at Cricket Communications understand that it is better to upgrade globally than to revolutionize globally. We will extend the aptitude of paradigms to enable. We will innovate the term "extensible". We constantly architect open-source implementation compliance. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's conditions! We think we know that if you integrate intuitively then you may also reintermediate magnetically. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and SMIL. What does the term "user interfaces" really mean? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our partnerships but our capability to cultivate. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our resource-constrained, frictionless, turn-key, client-focused CAD but our aptitude to expedite. Think mega-wireless. We understand that it is better to enable magnetically than to expedite holistically. We think that most subscriber-defined entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough FOAF.