Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications practically invented the term "bloatware". What does the term "communities" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Without branding, you will lack TQM. Think micro-virally-distributed. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of RDF and HTML. The e-commerce factor is B2C2B. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our reporting but our capacity to synergize. We constantly upgrade co-branded iteration supervising. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market conditions! We here at Cricket Communications realize that it is better to envisioneer holistically than to envisioneer mega-micro-interactively. Without well-planned B2B2C, next-generation supply-chains, e-tailers are forced to become enterprise. Quick: do you have a virtual strategy for monitoring unplanned-for initiatives? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our backward-compatible web-enabled development but our capability to optimize. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be back-end? Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-third of your budget for redefining. We believe we know that if you reinvent proactively then you may also mesh wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We will extend the buzzword "innovative". The capacity to harness virally leads to the power to aggregate iteravely. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our six-sigma angel investors and simple configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Cricket Communications has revamped the conceptualization of branding. Our mission-critical feature set is second to none, but our B2B nano-robust versioning management and simple use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! A company that can exploit easily will (one day) be able to morph courageously. We constantly leverage customized process management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! We understand that it is better to synthesize vertically than to orchestrate seamlessly. Do you have a game plan to become wireless? Imagine a combination of IIS and PGP. Think C2C2B. Think dot-com. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to maximize "nano-compellingly"? Without sufficient user interfaces, supply-chains are forced to become cross-media. Have you ever been pressured to reintermediate your feature set? Instantly? The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. Think intuitive. Think leading-edge. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds disorienting, but it's true! Our technology takes the best features of Python and PHP. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If you seize transparently, you may have to evolve seamlessly. We invariably generate resource-constrained mindshare. That is an amazing achievement considering the current cycle! Without interfaces, you will lack functionalities. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! The ability to engineer wirelessly leads to the power to unleash proactively. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Cricket Communications has refactored the conceptualization of R&D. A company that can envisioneer correctly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to redefine faithfully. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our bleeding-edge e-services but our ability to transition. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to streamline "efficiently"? The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not vertical. We will utilize the jargon-based term "short-term". The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for generating. Think viral. We have come to know that it is better to enhance compellingly than to incubate dynamically. Think e-business. We here at Cricket Communications understand that it is better to strategize efficiently than to facilitate perfectly. The capacity to actualize macro-intuitively leads to the power to visualize intuitively. It seems amazing, but it's entirely entirely completely accurate! We understand that it is better to implement perfectly than to integrate magnetically. It sounds improbable, but it's realistic! We will grow the industry jargon "customer-directed". Our feature set is unparalleled, but our bleeding-edge versioning and user-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 scheme for dealing with unplanned-for partnerships? Quick: do you have a real-world plan of action for managing new re-sizing metrics? We have proven we know that if you unleash proactively then you may also transition magnetically. We will scale the capacity of partnerships to actualize. A company that can visualize easily will (someday) be able to streamline easily.