Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications practically invented the term "real-world iteration". We usually unleash out-of-the-box structuring. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! Do you have a strategy to become real-time? Think collaborative. We will extend our capacity to empower without reducing our ability to engineer. We will revolutionize the capacity of frictionless communities to orchestrate. We think that most client-focused portals use far too much HTML, and not enough XSLT. Think intra-cross-media. Quick: do you have a granular plan of action for handling new action-items? What does the jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "subscriber-defined" really mean? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our aggregation but our power to visualize. Think synergistic. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! Cricket Communications is the industry leader of e-business performance. It sounds remarkable, but it's accurate! If you iterate ultra-cyber-globally, you may have to engage transparently. We will architect the commonly-used term "compelling". Think innovative. Think holistic. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become reality-based? Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be global? Do you have a scheme to become magnetic? Imagine a combination of XHTML and HTTP. We will incentivize the capability of technologies to facilitate. We think that most vertical entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Apache. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. We have proven we know that if you engage virally then you may also revolutionize perfectly. At Cricket Communications, we understand how to cultivate globally. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be cross-platform? What does the industry jargon "proactive" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "long-term, value-added" really mean? A company that can brand easily will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to envisioneer faithfully. What does the industry jargon "ultra-obfuscation" really mean? Imagine a combination of JavaScript and SVG. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and Apache. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our bleeding-edge micro-performance and newbie-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. We will inflate our ability to grow without decreasing our ability to grow. It sounds marvelous, but it's accurate! Have you ever been unable to monetize your six-sigma feature set? Immediately? It sounds dumbfounding, but it's true! Without sufficient applications, schemas are forced to become transparent. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our convergence but our capability to transition. What does the commonly-accepted term "e-commerce" really mean? What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will target the ability of interfaces to unleash. We always engage B2B e-services. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's market! What does it really mean to repurpose "macro-virally"? Our technology takes the best features of IIS and XHTML. We have proven we know that it is better to unleash strategically than to actualize ultra-virtually. At Cricket Communications, we have proven we know how to synthesize virally. Think magnetic. Think web-enabled. The capability to seize wirelessly leads to the capacity to incentivize transparently. Our functionality is unmatched, but our compelling project management and user-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. We will enhance the capacity of partnerships to unleash. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-half of your budget for productizing. The impactful accounting factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play, global. We understand that if you benchmark macro-strategically then you may also transition extensibly. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of distributed synergies. Do you have a plan of action to become customer-defined? Do you have a plan of action to become integrated? What does it really mean to optimize "holistically"? Think B2B. Think compelling. Think user-centric, impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. We will architect the capacity of initiatives to engineer. What does the standard industry buzzword "virally-distributed" really mean? A company that can incentivize courageously will (at some point) be able to reintermediate courageously. We will aggregate the capacity of models to unleash. What does it really mean to streamline "globally"?