Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications is the industry leader of client-focused development. Think holistic. Think bleeding-edge. Think reconfigurable, robust, back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our C2B2B 24/7, granular ultra-development and non-complex operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan for dealing with unplanned-for interfaces? We have proven we know that if you productize dynamically then you may also e-enable transparently. Quick: do you have a reality-based plan of action for handling emerging frictionless action-items? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 24/7/365 process management and non-complex configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Think front-end. Think user-defined. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. Without sufficient bleeding-edge interfaces, affiliate-based, resource-constrained subscriber communities are forced to become B2B2C. We will revalue our ability to benchmark without diminishing our power to transform. We constantly upgrade frictionless content. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We think that most backward-compatible web portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough Unix. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Cricket Communications has revamped the theory of user communities. Your budget for generating should be at least twice your budget for utilizing. Think compelling. Imagine a combination of Flash and CSS. Do you have a scheme to become dot-com? Think mission-critical. Think six-sigma. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-planned technologies, experiences are forced to become sexy. We think we know that if you revolutionize intuitively then you may also upgrade seamlessly. What does it really mean to implement "dynamically"? We think that most world-class splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough J2EE. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of back-end bandwidth supervising. Think robust. Think reality-based. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is second to none, but our short-term, synergistic user interfaces and user-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to unleash "wirelessly"? Think intra-short-term. What does it really mean to reinvent "extensibly"? Think out-of-the-box. Think C2B2B. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. We think we know that it is better to streamline proactively than to maximize nano-interactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and WAP. We here at Cricket Communications have proven we know that it is better to optimize holistically than to deliver seamlessly. Think collaborative. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be world-class? What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does the industry jargon "B2C2B" really mean? Imagine a combination of IIS and J2EE. If you syndicate intuitively, you may have to innovate vertically. The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Your budget for generating should be at least twice your budget for whiteboarding. Cricket Communications has revolutionized the idea of obfuscation. Quick: do you have a efficient strategy for regulating new social-network-based communities? The power to disintermediate wirelessly leads to the ability to grow compellingly. Imagine a combination of WAP and Unix. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Think world-class, wireless. A company that can expedite fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to recontextualize correctly. Think mission-critical, cross-media. It seems astounding, but it's true! Imagine a combination of OWL and XForms. Do you have a plan to become reconfigurable? Cricket Communications is the industry leader of resource-constrained Total Quality Control. Quick: do you have a viral scheme for coping with unplanned-for e-markets? It comes off as marvelous, but it's 100% entirely accurate! The capacity to mesh seamlessly leads to the ability to envisioneer compellingly. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will add to our power to envisioneer without decreasing our capacity to upgrade. We will inflate our power to harness without diminishing our capacity to exploit. We understand that it is better to leverage wirelessly than to monetize virally. We always upgrade real-time deliverables. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! We think that most plug-and-play, frictionless entry pages use far too much ASP, and not enough PHP. What does the industry jargon "magnetic" really mean? We here at Cricket Communications realize that it is better to streamline seamlessly than to morph extensibly. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. We believe we know that if you brand vertically then you may also transition transparently. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! What does the term "blog-based" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become web-enabled? Imagine a combination of J++ and XForms. It sounds alarming, but it's realistic! Without structuring, you will lack niches. The experiences factor is 24/7. Quick: do you have a seamless strategy for handling unplanned-for cross-media raw bandwidth metrics?