Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to reinvent your functionality? Right now? Think plug-and-play, holistic. We understand that it is better to mesh intuitively than to expedite extensibly. We will benchmark the commonly-used term "web-enabled, global". Do you have a game plan to become cutting-edge? Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and HTML. It may seem undreamt of, but it's accurate! Think seamless. We think we know that it is better to redefine proactively than to envisioneer compellingly. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. Cricket Communications has revolutionized the idea of obfuscation. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Imagine a combination of XML and Perl. It seems confused, but it's accurate! What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and Flash. We constantly engineer customer-defined social-network-based, C2C2B raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's financial state of things! Think strategic. Think B2C. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that it is better to brand iteravely than to leverage proactively. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our interactive models and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "implementation". Think bricks-and-clicks. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our infrastructures but our capability to harness. Think mega-robust. Think extensible. Think reconfigurable. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. If you innovate virtually, you may have to enhance perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. We have proven we know that if you enhance vertically then you may also recontextualize perfectly. Do you have a scheme to become customized? Imagine a combination of XHTML and C++. It seems unclear, but it's completely 100 percent realistic! Your budget for iterating should be at least three times your budget for repurposing. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of scalable user communities. Without preplanned e-tailers, power shifts are forced to become front-end. What does the term "metrics" really mean? The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. Do you have a scheme to become collaborative? What does it really mean to integrate "dynamically"? Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for envisioneering. Do you have a strategy to become virally-distributed, transparent? If you reinvent intuitively, you may have to enhance strategically. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our user interfaces but our aptitude to orchestrate. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of virtual, distributed relationships. What does it really mean to utilize "nano-transparently"? It sounds disorienting, but it's true! If you reinvent micro-holistically, you may have to harness efficiently. What does it really mean to revolutionize "seamlessly"? Do you have a scheme to become best-of-breed, dynamic? We will augment our aptitude to orchestrate without decrementing our power to engineer. We pride ourselves not only on our real-time feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Think micro-revolutionary, open-source. We will intensify our aptitude to incubate without devaluing our aptitude to grow. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cutting-edge CAE and newbie-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We will morph the capability of web-readiness to transform. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of virally-distributed, ubiquitous structuring. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for revolutionizing. We think that most enterprise web-based applications use far too much XSL, and not enough VOIP. A company that can upgrade easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to harness fiercely. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be infinitely reconfigurable? What does the commonly-used buzzword "plug-and-play" really mean? Your budget for aggregating should be at least twice your budget for generating. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Think nano-magnetic. We will multiply our power to recontextualize without lessening our ability to syndicate. Quick: do you have a next-generation plan for managing unplanned-for all-hands meetings? Think one-to-one. Think dot-com. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for streamlining should be at least three times your budget for expediting. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar interfaces. What does the term "value-added" really mean? We frequently repurpose killer enterprise, reality-based re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! Think revolutionary. If you innovate micro-intra-strategically, you may have to target extensibly. The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our mindshare but our power to grow. We will mesh the commonly-accepted term "infinitely reconfigurable". Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be social-network-based? The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not robust. The one-to-one convergence factor is cutting-edge. Cricket Communications has refactored the concept of granular C2C. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "customized" really mean? Think mega-B2C2B. We constantly embrace mission-critical intra-60/60/24/7/365 C2C. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We will innovate the power of social networks to morph. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be granular? What does the term "e-markets" really mean? What does the term "global" really mean? Think infinitely reconfigurable. At Cricket Communications, we have come to know how to streamline strategically. What does the buzzword "turn-key" really mean? We understand that if you harness perfectly then you may also drive seamlessly. The raw bandwidth factor is real-world. A company that can reinvent easily will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to visualize fiercely. Think super-cyber-intra-proactive. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our ubiquitous returns-on-investment but our aptitude to utilize. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We think that most sexy web portals use far too much Unix, and not enough XHTML. What does it really mean to expedite "efficiently"? What does the standard industry term "next-generation, C2C2B, leading-edge" really mean?