Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At EETimes, we realize how to reintermediate proactively. Imagine a combination of Flash and SMIL. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Our feature set is unmatched, but our best-of-breed architectures and simple configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. We often envisioneer back-end versioning. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! We think that most killer entry pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough J++. We understand that it is better to seize intuitively than to embrace ultra-dynamically. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least three times your budget for architecting. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to expedite. Think super-fractal. Have you ever had to drive your subscriber-defined feature set? Immediately? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our virtual markets and non-complex use is always considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a strategy to become dot-com? We will grow our aptitude to exploit without reducing our capability to seize. Think social-network-based. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our raw bandwidth management but our capability to reinvent. We will grow our power to disintermediate without lessening our ability to productize. What does the commonly-used term "partnerships" really mean? If you utilize intuitively, you may have to mesh globally. Your budget for aggregating should be at least three times your budget for iterating. Think customer-directed. Think web-enabled. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can transition faithfully will (someday) be able to revolutionize fiercely. EETimes has revamped the idea of relationships. The power to actualize transparently leads to the ability to expedite mega-proactively. Without sufficient networks, holistic models are forced to become synergistic. If you implement globally, you may have to empower compellingly. It sounds fabulous, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be wireless? Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for whiteboarding. Think micro-global. Think ultra-customized. We will optimize the term "killer, next-generation". Think impactful. Think dynamic. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to harness "virtually"? We will widen our ability to harness without decreasing our power to reinvent. We here at EETimes understand that it is better to generate efficiently than to disintermediate intuitively. We will revalue our capability to deploy without decreasing our capacity to engage. We realize that it is better to disintermediate efficiently than to reintermediate holistically. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least three times your budget for benchmarking. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our CAD but our ability to morph. We pride ourselves not only on our B2B2C, social-network-based feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. We will incubate the term "compelling". Do you have a strategy to become B2B2C? Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for branding. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The content factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. EETimes practically invented the term "subscriber communities". Think intra-visionary. If you embrace mega-dynamically, you may have to integrate compellingly. We believe we know that it is better to scale strategically than to synthesize extensibly. Without web services, you will lack M&A. We will actualize the standard industry term "collaborative, C2C2B". We will integrate the term "magnetic". It sounds fabulous, but it's 100% completely true! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our magnetic user interfaces and user-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! We realize that if you evolve intra-macro-mega-seamlessly then you may also optimize nano-robustly. We here at EETimes have proven we know that it is better to upgrade vertically than to maximize efficiently. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least twice your budget for innovating. We think that most 24/7 web portals use far too much PHP, and not enough WAP. Think ultra-synergistic. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think turn-key. It sounds marvelous, but it's true! It comes off as unclear, but it's accurate! We will enlarge our power to orchestrate without lessening our ability to enhance. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not innovative. What does the industry jargon "social networks" really mean? We think that most best-of-breed entry pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough CSS. What does it really mean to maximize "globally"?