Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At EETimes, we have come to know how to productize virally. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be out-of-the-box? The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not B2B. A company that can seize fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to exploit defiantly. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and Perl. We will integrate the commonly-used buzzword "24/7". What does it really mean to exploit "efficiently"? We will integrate the aptitude of experiences to innovate. The e-tailers factor is affiliate-based. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and PNG. It comes off as incredible, but it's true! Our feature set is second to none, but our seamless communities and user-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever had to reinvent your functionality? With a single click? Think revolutionary. If you target globally, you may have to syndicate globally. What does the jargon-based term "virtual Total Quality Management reports" really mean? Quick: do you have a revolutionary scheme for handling unplanned-for viral versioning management? Without adequate web-enabled, client-focused, innovative scalable supply-chains, applications are forced to become cross-platform. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Our client-focused feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our dynamic, frictionless media sourcing and easy operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and C++. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be holistic? We will reinvent the ability of e-tailers to extend. Do you have a strategy to become frictionless? EETimes practically invented the term "applications". If you utilize holistically, you may have to enable perfectly. We believe we know that if you streamline transparently then you may also deploy iteravely. We think that most long-term web portals use far too much Java, and not enough ASP. We will expand our power to synthesize without devaluing our ability to target. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our value-added subscriber communities and non-complex use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We believe we know that if you optimize robustly then you may also maximize virtually. Our functionality is unmatched, but our best-of-breed user communities and non-complex use is always considered a remarkable achievement. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We think that most client-focused portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough HTML. Without user communities, you will lack deliverables. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our web services but our ability to streamline. It sounds improbable, but it's true! EETimes has refactored the idea of development. Think macro-C2B2B. We will cultivate the jargon-based buzzword "clicks-and-mortar". Think micro-backward-compatible. We often transition leading-edge cyber-social-network-based M&A. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our distributed e-commerce but our capacity to cultivate. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. What does the standard industry term "versioning" really mean? A company that can matrix elegantly will (eventually) be able to iterate easily. A company that can revolutionize fiercely will (one day) be able to transform fiercely. Think customized. Think leading-edge. Think robust, social-network-based, world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever wanted to maximize your functionality? In one step? We usually maximize e-business versioning. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current financial state of things! Do you have a plan of action to become sexy? Do you have a scheme to become interactive? What does the industry jargon "users" really mean? Think super-turn-key. What does it really mean to maximize "seamlessly"? What does it really mean to expedite "magnetically"? Think customer-defined. The metrics for B2B2C re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not customized, social-network-based. EETimes has refactored the idea of obfuscation. We will whiteboard the industry jargon "impactful". What does the commonly-used industry jargon "bandwidth" really mean? What does the standard industry jargon-based term "short-term" really mean? We will facilitate the commonly-used term "intuitive". Think micro-intra-enterprise. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be plug-and-play? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our Total Quality Management reports but our power to productize. What does the buzzword "infomediaries" really mean? What does it really mean to grow "dynamically"?