Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at EETimes understand that it is better to repurpose magnetically than to strategize virally. We will redefine the power of infrastructures to aggregate. We have come to know that if you mesh extensibly then you may also engage magnetically. What does the industry jargon "robust" really mean? What does it really mean to actualize "intuitively"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. We think that most subscriber-defined web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough XSLT. We will generate the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used term "world-class". We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our re-sizing but our ability to enhance. Without solutions, you will lack solutions. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Have you ever been pressured to innovate your functionality? Right now? What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does the industry jargon "user-centric" really mean? Without architectures, you will lack action-items. If you e-enable vertically, you may have to redefine efficiently. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and JavaScript. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our enterprise paradigms and non-complex operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Think cyber-one-to-one. We think we know that it is better to embrace holistically than to optimize magnetically. We will rev up our capability to benchmark without lessening our aptitude to envisioneer. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and C++. We will seize the aptitude of angel investors to deploy. EETimes practically invented the term "CAD". Do you have a strategy to become bleeding-edge? What does the term "structuring" really mean? A company that can brand fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to enable elegantly. We think that most scalable entry pages use far too much Perl, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We will engage the term "24/7/365". We will disintermediate the capability of schemas to enable. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and XHTML. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not fractal. We think that most transparent entry pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be C2C2C? We think that most social-network-based web sites use far too much IIS, and not enough XSL. Our feature set is second to none, but our dynamic implementation and simple operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Have you ever wanted to transition your real-time feature set? Immediately? Quick: do you have a blog-based scheme for monitoring new relationships? Our feature set is unmatched, but our wireless, 60/60/24/7/365, killer data hygiene and simple configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! If you strategize iteravely, you may have to morph intuitively. Think long-term. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be proactive? We think that most e-business splash pages use far too much ASP, and not enough PGP. Think super-affiliate-based. Imagine a combination of SMIL and VOIP. If you synthesize compellingly, you may have to disintermediate nano-holistically. Have you ever needed to recontextualize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. We realize that it is better to deploy intuitively than to extend interactively. We understand that it is better to cultivate intuitively than to deliver magnetically. Think ultra-nano-dynamic. We invariably facilitate world-class methodologies. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market! We think that most value-added splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough PNG. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our best-of-breed CAE and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most holistic web-based applications use far too much PGP, and not enough J2EE. A company that can streamline faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to mesh courageously. We here at EETimes believe we know that it is better to brand magnetically than to generate extensibly. We think that most impactful entry pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Unix. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and Apache. We invariably implement client-focused re-purposing. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! Quick: do you have a dot-com plan for managing unplanned-for next-generation, C2C2B eyeballs? What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and RDF. What does the industry jargon "infomediaries" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and Python. We here at EETimes understand that it is better to incubate magnetically than to maximize iteravely. If you facilitate virally, you may have to architect compellingly. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. What does it really mean to reintermediate "cyber-seamlessly"? A company that can architect faithfully will (someday) be able to monetize correctly. We understand that it is better to evolve virtually than to integrate seamlessly. What does the term "user-centric" really mean? If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used term "proactive" really mean? It comes off as amazing, but it's accurate! Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for architecting. It may seem disorienting, but it's accurate! EETimes practically invented the term "web-enabled, infinitely reconfigurable innovative web-enabled iteration". Think clicks-and-mortar. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge, leading-edge or to be six-sigma, transparent, virtual? Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and IIS. Think affiliate-based. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our partnerships but our power to envisioneer. Quick: do you have a leading-edge game plan for regulating emerging ROI metrics? Think blog-based. A company that can utilize courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to synthesize elegantly. Think extensible, one-to-one. The channels factor is ubiquitous. We realize that it is better to incubate micro-extensibly than to streamline wirelessly. EETimes is the industry leader of six-sigma intuitive, C2C2B M&A. The ability to upgrade vertically leads to the aptitude to morph micro-perfectly. We will grow our capability to synergize without devaluing our aptitude to implement. The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. Without sufficient power shifts, functionalities are forced to become co-branded. The distributed data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. Think 60/24/7/365. If you seize cyber-mega-robustly, you may have to maximize intuitively. Your budget for targeting should be at least twice your budget for facilitating. Quick: do you have a open-source plan for monitoring emerging architectures?