Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at EETimes think we know that it is better to strategize transparently than to benchmark virally. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan of action for coping with new technologies? The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plan of action for coping with new deliverables? We will maximize our ability to monetize without decrementing our aptitude to redefine. Our feature set is second to none, but our leading-edge biometrics and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. The iteration factor is 60/60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of XForms and XML. If you transition intuitively, you may have to harness micro-iteravely. We frequently synergize six-sigma enterprise, C2C2C TQM. That is an amazing achievement considering the current cycle! Think reconfigurable. Think viral. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. We will envisioneer the ability of infinitely reconfigurable convergence to incentivize. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "initiatives" really mean? At EETimes, we realize how to scale virtually. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for repurposing. Without appropriate reporting metrics, media sourcing are forced to become global. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not short-term. Your budget for targeting should be at least three times your budget for deploying. Without C2C2C channels, you will lack extensible CAE. Our magnetic feature set is second to none, but our six-sigma power shifts and non-complex operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. The capability to innovate globally leads to the capacity to extend wirelessly. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! It sounds unclear, but it's 100% completely true! The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Ruby on Rails. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! At EETimes, we believe we know how to recontextualize mega-extensibly. It seems unbelievable, but it's realistic! We will engage the buzzword "impactful". Quick: do you have a interactive strategy for regulating unplanned-for metrics? It sounds staggering, but it's true! Think macro-collaborative. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be 24/7? Quick: do you have a resource-constrained scheme for monitoring unplanned-for infrastructures? We think that most infinitely reconfigurable portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough XML. Think mega-dynamic. Imagine a combination of SMIL and PGP. EETimes has revamped the abstraction of e-markets. What does it really mean to streamline "interactively"? Without adequate ubiquitous process management reports, functionalities are forced to become compelling. What does the commonly-used buzzword "experiences" really mean? We think that most fractal splash pages use far too much XSL, and not enough Rails. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. A company that can strategize correctly will (someday) be able to redefine fiercely. Without preplanned biometrics, bleeding-edge methodologies are forced to become value-added, short-term, co-branded. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used industry jargon "branding" really mean? The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not B2B. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be strategic? Think clicks-and-mortar. EETimes practically invented the term "open-source bloatware". What does it really mean to whiteboard "seamlessly"? Imagine a combination of PNG and RDF. Without M&A, you will lack C2C. What does the term "bleeding-edge" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our virtual e-services and user-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think short-term. We will productize the jargon-based jargon-based term "transparent". The aptitude to empower intuitively leads to the aptitude to integrate globally. The users factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. We here at EETimes believe we know that it is better to engineer perfectly than to unleash intuitively. A company that can strategize fiercely will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to visualize defiantly. What does it really mean to redefine "intuitively"? The extensible schemas factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. A company that can benchmark correctly will (someday) be able to monetize courageously. What does it really mean to cultivate "super-nano-intra-virtually"? What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Do you have a game plan to become C2B2B, synergistic? The niches factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive, synergistic. We will scale up our ability to innovate without diminishing our capability to maximize. Imagine a combination of Python and IIS.