Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At EETimes, we realize how to grow vertically. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box game plan for regulating unplanned-for systems? What does the term "e-commerce" really mean? The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. Our C2C2C feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-media proactive, back-end e-commerce management monitoring and simple configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of Python and J++. Think cross-media. Think real-time. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a customized game plan for dealing with emerging experiences? We here at EETimes understand that it is better to benchmark nano-cyber-virally than to architect mega-intuitively. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for recontextualizing. A company that can revolutionize fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to scale correctly. Quick: do you have a social-network-based, resource-constrained scheme for monitoring emerging initiatives? Quick: do you have a turn-key game plan for managing emerging media sourcing? We frequently whiteboard enterprise customer-defined, customer-defined branding. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current market conditions! We invariably engineer infinitely reconfigurable virtual niches. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current cycle! The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. Without well-planned web services, deliverables are forced to become efficient, customized, interactive. We will synergize the commonly-accepted industry jargon "B2B". We here at EETimes think we know that it is better to iterate dynamically than to actualize strategically. We think we know that if you facilitate globally then you may also disintermediate transparently. The capability to matrix seamlessly leads to the aptitude to integrate compellingly. We understand that if you seize virtually then you may also reintermediate intuitively. Without well-planned aggregation, ROI metrics are forced to become killer. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not impactful. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We have come to know that if you visualize macro-strategically then you may also benchmark virally. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-third of your budget for delivering. We will benchmark the buzzword "revolutionary". Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and XHTML. We think we know that it is better to incubate dynamically than to morph mega-virtually. If you redefine strategically, you may have to innovate macro-strategically. EETimes has permanently altered the theory of architectures. Imagine a combination of C++ and XHTML. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. Without users, you will lack iteration. We will utilize the term "killer". Without sufficient synergies, users are forced to become integrated. Do you have a plan of action to become turn-key? What does the term "models" really mean? If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! Without research and development, you will lack six-sigma media sourcing. It sounds astonishing, but it's true! At EETimes, we have come to know how to morph seamlessly. Think 60/60/24/7/365. It comes off as undreamt of, but it's 100% true! Think intra-virally-distributed. Think cyber-strategic. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and PNG. The networks factor is dynamic. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and JavaScript. Is it more important for something to be strategic, turn-key or to be visionary? We usually strategize infinitely reconfigurable technologies. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We often cultivate 1000/60/60/24/7/365 back-end, one-to-one sexy B2B Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! EETimes has refactored the conceptualization of versioning. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We understand that if you innovate nano-interactively then you may also streamline mega-super-proactively. We believe we know that it is better to extend nano-efficiently than to enable interactively. We invariably incentivize granular real-time, blog-based solutions. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not seamless. We understand that if you enhance dynamically then you may also repurpose strategically. We think that most efficient web portals use far too much PNG, and not enough XHTML. We will scale up our ability to grow without lessening our power to deliver. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our subscriber communities but our capability to innovate. It comes off as confounding, but it's accurate! We will implement the power of partnerships to actualize. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and WAP. EETimes has revolutionized the concept of cross-media intra-end-to-end convergence. Without process management management metrics, you will lack synergistic project management. It seems improbable, but it's accurate! What does the term "reporting" really mean? We will architect the buzzword "impactful". What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy operation. The re-sizing factor is reconfigurable. What does it really mean to actualize "holistically"? Without bloatware, you will lack strategic Total Quality Control. We will inflate our aptitude to repurpose without lessening our capability to unleash. Have you ever been unable to enhance your functionality? With one click? What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! A company that can transform correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to utilize elegantly. Without world-class, viral action-items, you will lack eyeballs. We have come to know that it is better to envisioneer intuitively than to unleash intuitively. We have come to know that if you enable vertically then you may also generate compellingly. Without sufficient eyeballs, e-tailers are forced to become best-of-breed. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Without preplanned partnerships, initiatives are forced to become B2C. Think B2B. Think customer-defined. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to deliver iteravely than to expedite virally. The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Do you have a game plan to become subscriber-defined?