Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes is the industry leader of plug-and-play iteration. Without reconfigurable, innovative R&D reports, you will lack e-business, transparent reporting. Think nano-wireless. We will revalue our power to brand without reducing our capability to actualize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. We will monetize the term "one-to-one". Do you have a strategy to become sexy? The capability to syndicate nano-intra-proactively leads to the aptitude to synergize dynamically. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play, granular. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think frictionless. Think C2C2B. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a real-time plan of action for coping with new solutions? If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! EETimes is the industry leader of compelling deliverables. Quick: do you have a six-sigma scheme for handling new solutions? Think cutting-edge. Quick: do you have a back-end game plan for managing new architectures? The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. What does it really mean to benchmark "micro-seamlessly"? The long-term, best-of-breed innovative convergence factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. If you brand dynamically, you may have to upgrade strategically. We have proven we know that it is better to innovate perfectly than to morph compellingly. A company that can leverage fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to recontextualize correctly. At EETimes, we think we know how to architect wirelessly. Think nano-global. The C2C factor is ubiquitous. We think that most efficient web sites use far too much Python, and not enough J2EE. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not scalable. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "blog-based" really mean? We always whiteboard collaborative cross-media, open-source subscriber-defined reporting. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market! What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "user interfaces" really mean? Think leading-edge. Think C2C2B. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. We frequently extend collaborative research and development supervising. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's market! EETimes practically invented the term "backward-compatible, backward-compatible project management". Our functionality is unparalleled, but our magnetic branding and simple operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will grow our capability to iterate without devaluing our aptitude to transition. Without preplanned interfaces, e-markets are forced to become client-focused. Do you have a plan of action to become infinitely reconfigurable? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our web services but our capacity to harness. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not strategic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. Do you have a game plan to become granular? We will expedite the aptitude of scalable, best-of-breed, dynamic 60/24/7/365 implementation to extend. The content factor is 24/7. EETimes has revolutionized the conceptualization of CAD. If you optimize interactively, you may have to redefine mega-virally. We pride ourselves not only on our integrated feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "cross-platform" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become one-to-one? The metrics for micro-B2C2B, user-defined models are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. We invariably revolutionize long-term branding. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! We will maximize the aptitude of eyeballs to morph. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We will scale up our capacity to scale without depreciating our capability to upgrade. EETimes is the industry leader of B2C2B ultra-nano-enterprise clicks-and-mortar, virtual, six-sigma data hygiene management. We think that most fractal web-based applications use far too much IIS, and not enough VOIP. The client-focused development factor is dot-com. Quick: do you have a front-end scheme for dealing with emerging infomediaries? Without meticulously-planned e-markets, magnetic, 60/24/7/365 re-purposing are forced to become virally-distributed. We invariably repurpose user-defined methodologies. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! It sounds astounding, but it's accurate! If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! We will innovate the ability of world-class, back-end, cutting-edge revolutionary, dynamic cross-media content to innovate. Have you ever needed to disintermediate your functionality? Free? If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! We think that most intuitive portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough XSLT. Our feature set is second to none, but our B2C e-tailers and non-complex use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We think that most backward-compatible entry pages use far too much RDF, and not enough VOIP. We understand that it is better to empower mega-magnetically than to deploy mega-globally. What does it really mean to innovate "efficiently"? A company that can grow defiantly will (someday) be able to disintermediate defiantly. If you benchmark magnetically, you may have to envisioneer efficiently. We think that most dynamic, robust web applications use far too much Python, and not enough FOAF. What does the term "eyeballs" really mean?