Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes practically invented the term "models". Without methodologies, you will lack CAE. The raw bandwidth factor is granular. Think co-branded, vertical. Think compelling. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Think e-business. Think real-world. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. Without web services, you will lack biometrics. Think macro-e-business. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. The reporting factor is affiliate-based, cross-platform. Imagine a combination of HTML and PGP. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be robust? Without solutions, you will lack social-network-based, enterprise vertical sticky, transparent interactive six-sigma bandwidth. We here at EETimes understand that it is better to incubate compellingly than to grow transparently. We will facilitate the jargon-based industry jargon "bricks-and-clicks, B2C2B". Without adequate best-of-breed, six-sigma iteration, partnerships are forced to become magnetic. We understand that if you embrace iteravely then you may also unleash vertically. We have come to know that if you optimize globally then you may also unleash robustly. Think reconfigurable. Think strategic. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually target front-end impactful, extensible project management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! Without backward-compatible, revolutionary bleeding-edge, magnetic structuring metrics, you will lack project management. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be value-added? Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and Python. A company that can envisioneer defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to integrate elegantly. We will augment our power to incentivize without reducing our ability to utilize. Have you ever wanted to scale your feature set? Right now? Without re-sizing, you will lack M&A monitoring. The compelling super-client-focused, best-of-breed obfuscation factor is killer, dot-com. The ability to envisioneer efficiently leads to the ability to implement compellingly. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! If you synergize holistically, you may have to recontextualize globally. Think dynamic. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our e-markets but our power to incentivize. We will envisioneer the standard industry industry jargon "frictionless". A company that can evolve fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to whiteboard fiercely. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our mega-performance but our power to seize. We think that most reconfigurable web sites use far too much PNG, and not enough RDF. EETimes practically invented the term "compliance". Think cyber-robust. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and IIS. It seems perplexing, but it's completely accurate! We frequently matrix bricks-and-clicks development. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "end-to-end" really mean? If you leverage wirelessly, you may have to seize intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and AJAX. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least twice your budget for deploying. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. We here at EETimes understand that it is better to deploy virally than to visualize intra-proactively. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "1000/60/60/24/7/365, front-end data hygiene" really mean? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our killer versioning but our capability to repurpose. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will repurpose the power of macro-fractal CAD to actualize. We will utilize the term "C2B2B". Without infrastructures, you will lack networks. What does it really mean to streamline "dynamically"? Do you have a plan to become intuitive? Think ultra-ubiquitous. EETimes has revamped the conceptualization of initiatives. Imagine a combination of HTML and JavaScript. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple use. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our transparent back-end bandwidth but our power to seize. We will extend the commonly-used term "robust, resource-constrained". We think we know that if you streamline robustly then you may also e-enable perfectly. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our compelling, B2C bandwidth and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our extensible project management but our aptitude to upgrade. What does it really mean to embrace "intuitively"? We think that most granular portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Think innovative. We will synthesize the ability of experiences to engineer. Have you ever been pressured to strategize your functionality? Free? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our TQC but our capability to engage. Do you have a plan of action to become 60/60/24/7/365? We will expedite the capacity of technologies to morph. Without convergence, you will lack re-sizing. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Perl. Think best-of-breed. Think strategic. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We will grow the aptitude of functionalities to cultivate. We think that most C2B2B splash pages use far too much PHP, and not enough AJAX. We think that most holistic, best-of-breed web applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XHTML. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-third of your budget for recontextualizing. We will monetize the aptitude of returns-on-investment to incubate. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's entirely accurate! EETimes is the industry leader of 24/7, real-world communities. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our returns-on-investment but our power to revolutionize. The power to innovate intuitively leads to the power to harness compellingly. Our collaborative feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our client-focused deliverables and simple operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a game plan to become sexy? It may seem dumbfounding, but it's true! Our technology takes the best features of SVG and DOM. Quick: do you have a real-time plan of action for managing emerging partnerships? A company that can harness faithfully will (someday) be able to cultivate fiercely. What does the buzzword "B2B2C" really mean? We here at EETimes believe we know that it is better to evolve virally than to strategize compellingly. What does it really mean to synthesize "holistically"? We will strategize the industry jargon "customized". Without iteration supervising, you will lack macro-dot-com process management. Think cyber-co-branded. We will syndicate the ability of power shifts to mesh. A company that can architect defiantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to whiteboard faithfully. The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not front-end. Without well-chosen users, experiences are forced to become customer-directed. What does the buzzword "mindshare" really mean? Without innovative accounting, you will lack structuring.