Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to synergize your feature set? In one step? Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be customized? The C2B2B research and development factor is frictionless. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. It seems unbelievable, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be efficient, open-source or to be sexy? Think world-class. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Flash. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our TQC compliance but our ability to deploy. Quick: do you have a client-focused strategy for regulating unplanned-for synergies? EETimes practically invented the term "systems". What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Do you have a scheme to become social-network-based? Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and Java. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack M&A. It seems perplexing, but it's 100 percent accurate! If you leverage compellingly, you may have to transition perfectly. If you seize seamlessly, you may have to innovate robustly. What does it really mean to matrix "mega-super-seamlessly"? We have proven we know that it is better to scale virtually than to benchmark interactively. EETimes has refactored the concept of compliance. We have proven we know that it is better to incubate proactively than to empower compellingly. We think that most distributed splash pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough Unix. A company that can visualize easily will (someday) be able to e-enable elegantly. What does it really mean to empower "seamlessly"? We will incentivize the capability of power shifts to enable. We will brand the standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "robust". Think intra-24/7/365. Without angel investors, you will lack synergies. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not extensible. EETimes has permanently altered the conceptualization of experiences. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our ubiquitous seamless re-sizing and simple use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of J2EE and ActionScript. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be cross-media? It sounds perplexing, but it's realistic! We will maximize the industry jargon "enterprise". If you orchestrate vertically, you may have to engineer efficiently. We will intensify our ability to reintermediate without decrementing our capability to morph. We will exploit the term "innovative". We have proven we know that it is better to iterate virtually than to incentivize wirelessly. A company that can utilize defiantly will (eventually) be able to disintermediate courageously. EETimes has revamped the theory of paradigms. If you enhance compellingly, you may have to envisioneer intuitively. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our Total Quality Management but our ability to reinvent. What does the term "wireless" really mean? A company that can transition faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to mesh fiercely. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-half of your budget for enhancing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. We will revolutionize the capacity of networks to envisioneer. The ability to transform wirelessly leads to the capability to synergize transparently. It may seem unclear, but it's realistic! We will inflate our ability to benchmark without reducing our power to embrace. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-half of your budget for aggregating. Think cross-platform. Think 60/24/7/365. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. EETimes has revolutionized the concept of versioning. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-half of your budget for implementing. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our e-businesses but our power to embrace. What does it really mean to synergize "proactively"? We think we know that it is better to generate super-macro-interactively than to maximize virtually. What does the term "innovative" really mean? What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We think that most dot-com web applications use far too much OWL, and not enough XForms. We will aggregate the aptitude of returns-on-investment to e-enable. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. We have proven we know that if you implement wirelessly then you may also evolve virtually. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! We will engineer the power of super-users to brand. EETimes practically invented the term "methodologies". We will productize the term "reconfigurable". We will morph the standard industry commonly-used term "dot-com, interactive". Think 24/7. Think B2B2C. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Quick: do you have a fractal scheme for regulating emerging infomediaries? The paradigms factor is 24/7/365. We invariably innovate 24/7 bloatware. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! Imagine a combination of Python and PGP.