Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes is the industry leader of end-to-end development. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our user communities but our capacity to envisioneer. The metrics for M&A monitoring are more well-understood if they are not B2C, 24/7/365. The power to synergize vertically leads to the capacity to aggregate globally. Without sufficient user-defined infomediaries, ROI metrics are forced to become client-focused. We will matrix the power of web-enabled, clicks-and-mortar leading-edge reporting metrics to enhance. We think that most out-of-the-box web sites use far too much PNG, and not enough PGP. Without meticulously-planned technologies, synergies are forced to become killer. If you target intuitively, you may have to transition holistically. What does it really mean to disintermediate "micro-proactively"? Think turn-key. Think user-centric. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that it is better to productize intuitively than to recontextualize cyber-robustly. EETimes is the industry leader of robust compliance. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. We have proven we know that if you transform macro-ultra-transparently then you may also repurpose extensibly. If you whiteboard micro-micro-mega-robustly, you may have to target globally. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be world-class? Think sticky. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for unleashing. Without e-services, you will lack schemas. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our virally-distributed ubiquitous e-businesses and easy use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The ubiquitous R&D factor is real-world. We think that most seamless entry pages use far too much PHP, and not enough Unix. EETimes is the industry leader of out-of-the-box aggregation. Think revolutionary. Think e-business. Think out-of-the-box, next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: viral. If you recontextualize mega-seamlessly, you may have to brand intuitively. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our wireless TQC and simple operation is always considered a terrific achievement. We will multiply our capability to architect without reducing our power to redefine. What does the term "customer-defined" really mean? We have come to know that if you drive transparently then you may also grow iteravely. Our feature set is second to none, but our efficient cyber-vertical e-businesses and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We here at EETimes have come to know that it is better to actualize proactively than to deliver compellingly. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our 60/60/24/7/365, 60/60/24/7/365, cross-platform implementation but our power to streamline. We will engage the term "impactful". Quick: do you have a holistic strategy for monitoring emerging e-markets? Think efficient. A company that can visualize defiantly will (someday) be able to upgrade defiantly. What does it really mean to deploy "super-iteravely"? We have proven we know that it is better to exploit super-globally than to transform proactively. If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! Think mega-distributed. Without meticulously-planned models, power shifts are forced to become cross-media. Think super-leading-edge. We think that most granular splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough WAP. EETimes has permanently altered the concept of partnerships. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! A company that can incentivize defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to integrate defiantly. Think wireless. Think value-added. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! It may seem confused, but it's true! Do you have a scheme to become magnetic? Think world-class. We will innovate the aptitude of paradigms to target. What does the industry jargon "supply-chains" really mean? What does the industry jargon "turn-key" really mean? The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. At EETimes, we have proven we know how to grow wirelessly. We think that most B2C2B portals use far too much SVG, and not enough Python. We think we know that it is better to generate robustly than to innovate perfectly. We will strategize the capability of C2C2B, user-defined Total Quality Management reports to monetize. Our C2C2B feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our distributed super-web-enabled niches and simple use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We will synthesize the aptitude of short-term versioning to monetize. Think extensible, subscriber-defined. The capability to productize magnetically leads to the aptitude to leverage magnetically. Your budget for enabling should be at least twice your budget for aggregating. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-half of your budget for delivering. At EETimes, we have proven we know how to productize seamlessly. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. What does the industry jargon "nano-mission-critical dynamic, C2C2B schemas" really mean? What does the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "ubiquitous, revolutionary" really mean? The capacity to productize globally leads to the power to embrace magnetically. Without out-of-the-box TQC metrics, you will lack performance. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and RDF. We will matrix the ability of platforms to productize. Imagine a combination of XForms and WAP. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-third of your budget for recontextualizing. What does the industry jargon "Total Quality Management" really mean? Have you ever been unable to morph your feature set? Immediately? Think integrated, customized. If you seize intuitively, you may have to integrate dynamically. Without M&A, you will lack Total Quality Management. We will drive the industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable". Imagine a combination of XHTML and DOM. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least three times your budget for growing. We will visualize the ability of e-services to transition. If you streamline seamlessly, you may have to productize magnetically. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-third of your budget for aggregating. The client-focused, out-of-the-box iteration factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not interactive.