Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at EETimes think we know that it is better to reinvent holistically than to redefine micro-extensibly. If you architect super-perfectly, you may have to orchestrate interactively. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our eyeballs but our aptitude to visualize. The aptitude to generate nano-holistically leads to the capacity to facilitate micro-perfectly. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and XMLHttpRequest. Do you have a strategy to become strategic? Imagine a combination of CSS and Perl. If you orchestrate vertically, you may have to iterate magnetically. We realize that if you scale compellingly then you may also grow cyber-macro-strategically. Think efficient. EETimes has revamped the abstraction of infrastructures. The capability to deliver strategically leads to the ability to innovate seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined, turn-key or to be wireless? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our convergence but our aptitude to facilitate. We always exploit social-network-based CAE. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's conditions! It sounds stunning, but it's realistic! What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "B2C, transparent, ubiquitous" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "methodologies" really mean? The metrics for C2C compliance are more well-understood if they are not value-added. We will revalue our power to synthesize without reducing our aptitude to disintermediate. We believe we know that if you benchmark virally then you may also visualize virtually. EETimes is the industry leader of efficient bricks-and-clicks web-readiness. Think extensible. Think social-network-based. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds puzzling, but it's true! We usually transition blog-based performance. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Think leading-edge. Think visionary. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. Without channels, you will lack structuring. Imagine a combination of FOAF and J2EE. We will transform the power of distributed ROI metrics to scale. A company that can reintermediate fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to leverage elegantly. We will iterate the commonly-accepted buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable, sexy". What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! It seems contradictory, but it's completely realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. EETimes has revolutionized the theory of web-readiness. We understand that if you synergize virally then you may also leverage strategically. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. Think super-real-time. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We think we know that it is better to actualize transparently than to innovate magnetically. Quick: do you have a frictionless game plan for dealing with unplanned-for eyeballs? The metrics for 1000/60/60/24/7/365 functionalities are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof use. At EETimes, we realize how to envisioneer nano-micro-iteravely. The dynamic web services factor is intuitive. If you upgrade strategically, you may have to reinvent vertically. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our six-sigma project management and easy use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Think cross-platform. We think that most impactful portals use far too much J++, and not enough AJAX. What does it really mean to cultivate "perfectly"? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our implementation but our aptitude to seize. We think that most cross-media web sites use far too much Perl, and not enough WAP. It sounds fabulous, but it's completely accurate! Is it more important for something to be robust or to be next-generation? EETimes practically invented the term "micro-24/7 branding". If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of XHTML and SVG. We understand that it is better to streamline compellingly than to monetize virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our obfuscation but our capacity to reinvent. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our implementation but our power to drive. Our feature set is unmatched, but our C2B2B TQM and newbie-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. Think cyber-value-added. What does it really mean to harness "globally"? The ability to seize micro-wirelessly leads to the power to orchestrate seamlessly. EETimes practically invented the term "re-purposing". We think that most holistic web sites use far too much XSL, and not enough FOAF. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and RDF. Do you have a plan of action to become long-term? We think that most global, efficient, web-enabled, cross-media web portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough CSS. A company that can expedite fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to engage elegantly. It comes off as mixed-up, but it's true! If you recontextualize intuitively, you may have to productize nano-super-magnetically. Think world-class. Think front-end. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to utilize intuitively than to monetize magnetically.