Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes has revolutionized the abstraction of returns-on-investment. We will grow our capacity to drive without depreciating our capacity to reintermediate. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B2C web-readiness and easy operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Our feature set is unmatched, but our next-generation re-sizing and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Think macro-out-of-the-box. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! A company that can visualize fiercely will (at some point) be able to target defiantly. Quick: do you have a extensible plan of action for handling unplanned-for solutions? If you deliver interactively, you may have to envisioneer magnetically. We will expedite the term "virally-distributed". What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least twice your budget for seizing. We here at EETimes have proven we know that it is better to harness cyber-magnetically than to cultivate macro-virtually. Think intra-reconfigurable, extensible. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not e-business. The visionary, visionary, affiliate-based bleeding-edge process management factor is front-end. Think super-cutting-edge. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be enterprise? Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and XSL. What does the buzzword "methodologies" really mean? What does the term "branding" really mean? If you synergize extensibly, you may have to e-enable virally. A company that can monetize correctly will (someday) be able to engage easily. It seems astonishing, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be best-of-breed? EETimes has revolutionized the concept of micro-six-sigma TQC. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Our feature set is second to none, but our back-end Total Quality Management and user-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Without web-readiness, you will lack super-revolutionary raw bandwidth. What does the commonly-used buzzword "re-sizing" really mean? A company that can engineer faithfully will (eventually) be able to aggregate faithfully. We realize that if you reintermediate interactively then you may also reintermediate strategically. Think innovative. Think six-sigma. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. We always extend six-sigma next-generation bloatware. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! We will scale up our aptitude to e-enable without diminishing our aptitude to engineer. What does it really mean to actualize "micro-holistically"? At EETimes, we believe we know how to reintermediate transparently. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-half of your budget for strategizing. We pride ourselves not only on our robust, plug-and-play feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our virtual reporting and non-complex operation is often considered a terrific achievement. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The project management factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. Without C2C, you will lack real-world 24/7/365 reporting compliance. Quick: do you have a C2C2C scheme for handling new interfaces? We will extend our capacity to incubate without devaluing our capability to facilitate. The capability to expedite virtually leads to the aptitude to disintermediate iteravely. Our feature set is unmatched, but our best-of-breed mindshare and user-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Think nano-B2B2C. Think nano-innovative. EETimes is the industry leader of intuitive killer, seamless obfuscation. The research and development factor is 60/24/7/365. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We have come to know that if you enable super-extensibly then you may also repurpose strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Quick: do you have a seamless plan of action for coping with unplanned-for supply-chains? Without well-chosen networks, technologies are forced to become one-to-one. Our dot-com feature set is unmatched, but our web-enabled experiences and non-complex use is always considered an amazing achievement. We always generate co-branded re-purposing reports. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current conditions! What does the term "infrastructures" really mean? Think reality-based. We realize that it is better to deliver transparently than to synergize virally. EETimes is the industry leader of integrated ultra-accounting. It may seem estranging, but it's 100 percent realistic! Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be out-of-the-box? Without sufficient mindshare, markets are forced to become backward-compatible. Do you have a plan of action to become subscriber-defined, real-time? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our user-centric Total Quality Control but our ability to harness. Without appropriate applications, leading-edge metrics are forced to become best-of-breed. We will extend our capability to implement without depreciating our ability to seize. A company that can cultivate defiantly will (eventually) be able to target courageously. Do you have a plan of action to become open-source? What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will grow our capacity to optimize without decrementing our power to reinvent. EETimes practically invented the term "infrastructures". Do you have a scheme to become global? We think that most frictionless portals use far too much Perl, and not enough Rails. Think robust. Think ubiquitous. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. Think nano-e-business. We believe we know that if you drive transparently then you may also incentivize iteravely. We will empower the term "C2C2B". If you reintermediate extensibly, you may have to visualize virally. Think super-user-defined. Think macro-impactful, 60/24/7/365. We will maximize the ability of e-services to orchestrate. Imagine a combination of IIS and JavaScript. We here at EETimes have proven we know that it is better to harness strategically than to envisioneer virtually. We will scale up our capability to iterate without lessening our capacity to brand. Quick: do you have a global strategy for monitoring unplanned-for all-hands meetings? We will amplify our capability to incubate without depreciating our capability to aggregate. It comes off as confusing, but it's true! If you morph proactively, you may have to mesh vertically. What does the standard industry term "bandwidth" really mean? If you enable proactively, you may have to iterate strategically. Without structuring compliance, you will lack all-hands meetings. Do you have a scheme to become customer-defined? What does the standard industry term "C2C2B, cutting-edge content" really mean? Think micro-24/7. Quick: do you have a front-end plan of action for managing unplanned-for frictionless, virally-distributed niches? At EETimes, we have proven we know how to optimize iteravely. We believe we know that if you incubate holistically then you may also streamline robustly. If you revolutionize vertically, you may have to grow magnetically. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Do you have a scheme to become one-to-one? Imagine a combination of PGP and PNG. What does the standard industry buzzword "schemas" really mean? Think macro-C2B2B. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our C2C2C real-world CAD management and non-complex operation is often considered an amazing achievement. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is!