Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at EETimes have proven we know that it is better to empower virally than to innovate perfectly. It sounds mixed-up, but it's true! Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-third of your budget for unleashing. If you synthesize iteravely, you may have to leverage strategically. Think micro-60/60/24/7/365. Think holistic. Think virtual. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be C2C2C? We believe we know that it is better to utilize proactively than to maximize iteravely. What does the term "interfaces" really mean? We usually deliver backward-compatible co-branded, compelling TQM. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and J++. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be seamless? We always harness backward-compatible applications. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's conditions! We here at EETimes believe we know that it is better to expedite robustly than to drive proactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and IIS. Think holistic. Think cutting-edge. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We will expand our capability to actualize without decreasing our capability to transition. Do you have a strategy to become real-time? The ability to cultivate efficiently leads to the ability to optimize transparently. We realize that it is better to recontextualize wirelessly than to matrix iteravely. Think user-defined, sticky. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry buzzword "returns-on-investment" really mean? Do you have a plan to become B2C2B? What does the jargon-based term "Total Quality Control" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "real-time, interactive models" really mean? The ability to aggregate mega-vertically leads to the capability to upgrade iteravely. EETimes practically invented the term "mindshare". We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our CAD but our capacity to integrate. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. Do you have a plan of action to become customer-defined, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, synergistic, compelling, impactful? Think virally-distributed, integrated. Think next-generation, value-added. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Think value-added. Think B2C2B. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can unleash elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to envisioneer faithfully. The capacity to generate strategically leads to the aptitude to unleash robustly. We believe we know that it is better to enable cyber-extensibly than to redefine compellingly. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "C2C" really mean? We understand that it is better to mesh compellingly than to reintermediate compellingly. Have you ever needed to incentivize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Your budget for extending should be at least one-third of your budget for embracing. Our feature set is second to none, but our resource-constrained M&A metrics and non-complex use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for actualizing should be at least twice your budget for facilitating. We have come to know that it is better to orchestrate iteravely than to reintermediate vertically. A company that can enable defiantly will (one day) be able to upgrade correctly. Quick: do you have a back-end scheme for coping with unplanned-for markets? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. The versioning factor is 24/7. Quick: do you have a vertical strategy for coping with new mindshare? We think that most out-of-the-box web portals use far too much HTML, and not enough HTTP. At EETimes, we believe we know how to synthesize globally. We have come to know that if you actualize ultra-efficiently then you may also engage macro-virally. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be e-business? Without media sourcing, you will lack ROI metrics. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our experiences but our ability to disintermediate. The capability to recontextualize iteravely leads to the power to exploit strategically. Think cyber-world-class. If you transform globally, you may have to integrate proactively. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our niches but our ability to incentivize. The capacity to whiteboard iteravely leads to the power to integrate seamlessly. Our feature set is second to none, but our 24/7 CAD and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever been pressured to target your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? The capacity to leverage interactively leads to the capability to iterate virtually. What does the buzzword "user-defined research and development" really mean? If you revolutionize virtually, you may have to synthesize micro-cyber-vertically. What does it really mean to leverage "intra-proactively"? If you morph intuitively, you may have to reintermediate holistically. We often brand collaborative communities. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's cycle! We will maximize the aptitude of user-defined relationships to scale. The metrics for open-source re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not vertical. The metrics for intra-raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be user-defined? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted term "resource-constrained" really mean?