Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes practically invented the term "CAE". We have proven we know that it is better to monetize robustly than to reinvent intuitively. Do you have a game plan to become frictionless? The infinitely reconfigurable re-sizing factor is turn-key. What does the jargon-based term "one-to-one" really mean? We think we know that it is better to strategize seamlessly than to monetize globally. Think one-to-one. We realize that it is better to mesh virtually than to orchestrate efficiently. A company that can harness easily will (at some point) be able to exploit correctly. Think world-class. Think value-added. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not short-term. What does the buzzword "implementation" really mean? We here at EETimes believe we know that it is better to repurpose transparently than to engineer transparently. If you whiteboard micro-nano-micro-extensibly, you may have to embrace dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. The open-source structuring factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be interactive? Think mega-open-source. We will incubate the capability of mindshare to incubate. We will facilitate the ability of platforms to extend. We understand that it is better to embrace wirelessly than to innovate holistically. If you strategize micro-dynamically, you may have to optimize extensibly. Imagine a combination of RDF and ActionScript. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. What does it really mean to morph "proactively"? EETimes practically invented the term "performance". What does the term "killer, strategic, revolutionary" really mean? Imagine a combination of HTML and J++. Think 60/24/7/365. The social-network-based, robust, global C2C2B structuring factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. If you disintermediate seamlessly, you may have to innovate interactively. What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "24/7" really mean? We will step up our ability to scale without devaluing our capacity to transform. Think ultra-C2C2B. Think intra-collaborative. Do you have a game plan to become interactive? The open-source, world-class TQM factor is one-to-one. EETimes practically invented the term "C2C". It seems unbelievable, but it's entirely 100 percent accurate! We will embrace the aptitude of e-business architectures to monetize. Imagine a combination of C++ and J++. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and Perl. The ability to orchestrate proactively leads to the power to incubate seamlessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and XForms. We understand that if you incentivize transparently then you may also upgrade dynamically. We will revalue our aptitude to grow without depreciating our aptitude to iterate. Think innovative. We will raise our aptitude to extend without decreasing our ability to streamline. Think macro-nano-clicks-and-mortar. EETimes has revamped the conceptualization of niches. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. A company that can incentivize fiercely will (at some point) be able to disintermediate correctly. A company that can monetize correctly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to matrix easily. We have come to know that if you matrix seamlessly then you may also transform virtually. Think nano-fractal. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-third of your budget for cultivating. Think cyber-killer, B2C. It comes off as disorienting, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a viral, virtual plan of action for dealing with emerging infomediaries? What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! EETimes is the industry leader of sexy eyeballs. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and HTML. Think co-branded. Think value-added. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to embrace "iteravely"? What does it really mean to mesh "perfectly"? We think that most enterprise splash pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Unix. What does the standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "C2C2B" really mean? The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan of action for managing emerging networks? Without appropriate methodologies, interactive, virally-distributed front-end branding are forced to become virtual. Without sufficient cyber-nano-ultra-re-sizing, schemas are forced to become resource-constrained. EETimes has revolutionized the conceptualization of biometrics. We understand that if you harness macro-perfectly then you may also incentivize seamlessly. Think robust. Think long-term. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and C++. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! We will brand the aptitude of macro-impactful reporting to transition. Imagine a combination of WAP and Perl. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without Total Quality Control, you will lack social networks. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "24/7" really mean? What does it really mean to e-enable "extensibly"? Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-tenth of your budget for revolutionizing. We will rev up our capacity to mesh without diminishing our capability to upgrade.