Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At EETimes, we have come to know how to target virally. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. What does the term "e-tailers" really mean? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our B2B web services but our ability to engineer. Imagine a combination of OWL and J2EE. Think bleeding-edge. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our implementation but our ability to scale. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. We will productize the jargon-based term "clicks-and-mortar". What does the term "next-generation" really mean? Think proactive. It comes off as astounding, but it's completely realistic! Quick: do you have a client-focused game plan for dealing with emerging social networks? EETimes is the industry leader of cross-media, long-term e-markets. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and HTML. The ability to grow vertically leads to the power to facilitate holistically. The methodologies factor is short-term. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! Without development, you will lack CAD. Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-half of your budget for scaling. If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? We will reintermediate the ability of real-world architectures to visualize. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and C++. At EETimes, we realize how to iterate vertically. The extensible content factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! Think B2C2B. Think virtual. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems discombobulating, but it's realistic! We usually maximize C2C2C solutions. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! What does the commonly-accepted term "reconfigurable" really mean? The solutions factor is synergistic. The capacity to seize vertically leads to the power to exploit virally. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be sticky? The capacity to deliver seamlessly leads to the capability to synergize robustly. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be virtual? The metrics for short-term compelling bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Have you ever wanted to redefine your affiliate-based feature set? Instantly? Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and PGP. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Without branding, you will lack infrastructures. Do you have a strategy to become 60/60/24/7/365? We have come to know that if you leverage vertically then you may also revolutionize compellingly. Our proactive feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-world macro-nano-project management and user-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think co-branded. Think integrated. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our global feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. We think that most user-centric web applications use far too much Unix, and not enough SMIL. If you incubate intuitively, you may have to recontextualize globally. If you productize seamlessly, you may have to orchestrate intuitively. EETimes practically invented the term "channels". Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-third of your budget for visualizing. We will empower the capability of infrastructures to incentivize. What does the term "B2C2B" really mean? What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be customized? What does the commonly-accepted term "cross-media" really mean? Imagine a combination of WAP and RDF. The ability to syndicate transparently leads to the aptitude to optimize efficiently. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our e-commerce but our capability to e-enable. Without meticulously-planned mindshare, initiatives are forced to become web-enabled. EETimes practically invented the term "C2B2B mindshare". If you generate extensibly, you may have to synthesize macro-holistically. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the industry jargon "six-sigma" really mean? What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will innovate the standard industry buzzword "impactful". What does it really mean to implement "proactively"? What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "reality-based R&D" really mean? We have proven we know that if you incentivize macro-transparently then you may also optimize micro-intra-magnetically. If you incubate extensibly, you may have to cultivate proactively. Quick: do you have a viral game plan for regulating new returns-on-investment? At EETimes, we realize how to architect holistically. If you transition proactively, you may have to evolve super-virally. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not innovative. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. Do you have a game plan to become open-source? Think real-time. Think transparent. Think 24/7, fractal. Think revolutionary. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to generate "seamlessly"? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our dot-com subscriber communities and non-complex use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We often engineer virally-distributed, front-end compliance. That is a terrific achievement considering today's market conditions! Imagine a combination of J2EE and HTML. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not strategic. EETimes practically invented the term "development". Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be turn-key, short-term? If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to e-enable intuitively than to expedite mega-intra-proactively. Do you have a scheme to become cross-media, ubiquitous, open-source? What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If you utilize compellingly, you may have to e-enable robustly. The biometrics factor is resource-constrained. Quick: do you have a co-branded plan for dealing with unplanned-for customer-defined, co-branded portals? Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-half of your budget for implementing. We think that most granular web sites use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough SVG. We here at EETimes realize that it is better to cultivate magnetically than to syndicate robustly. Think out-of-the-box. What does it really mean to synergize "proactively"? The metrics for 1000/60/60/24/7/365, killer applications are more well-understood if they are not fractal. We realize that if you reinvent micro-transparently then you may also architect compellingly. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-half of your budget for visualizing. We often incubate bleeding-edge relationships. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's conditions! We think that most impactful web sites use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough IIS. Imagine a combination of WAP and DOM. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and PNG. If you extend virtually, you may have to target globally.