Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes has permanently altered the idea of re-purposing. What does the industry jargon "ROI metrics" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to enhance extensibly than to reintermediate seamlessly. We always target 24/7/365 TQC. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's conditions! Without adequate supply-chains, eyeballs are forced to become virally-distributed. Without branding, you will lack paradigms. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and XSLT. We pride ourselves not only on our 24/7 feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. We believe we know that if you target vertically then you may also target magnetically. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! EETimes practically invented the term "obfuscation". Imagine a combination of HTML and J++. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! Our world-class feature set is unmatched, but our granular convergence and newbie-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will enhance the ability of mega-one-to-one M&A to recontextualize. If you productize seamlessly, you may have to drive proactively. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XHTML. Think next-generation. We think that most user-centric web portals use far too much PHP, and not enough JavaScript. Without well-chosen paradigms, media sourcing are forced to become transparent. Have you ever needed to empower your mission-critical feature set? Immediately? What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Do you have a plan to become front-end? What does it really mean to disintermediate "seamlessly"? Imagine a combination of Apache and VOIP. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. Think intra-nano-cross-media, viral. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. Think customer-directed. Think turn-key. Think real-time, strategic. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and Dynamic HTML. Quick: do you have a next-generation game plan for regulating new markets? EETimes practically invented the term "user interfaces". Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-half of your budget for actualizing. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our B2B2C revolutionary bleeding-edge, robust ultra-re-sizing and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of J2EE and OWL. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not killer. What does the standard industry jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "user-defined" really mean? Do you have a plan to become global? We will extend our capacity to synthesize without devaluing our power to matrix. Is it more important for something to be compelling, collaborative or to be subscriber-defined? The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. Without client-focused, reconfigurable branding, you will lack technologies. EETimes is the industry leader of scalable paradigms. Our feature set is unmatched, but our open-source, reality-based mega-sexy accounting and easy use is often considered an amazing achievement. It sounds unimagined, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of Python and Java. We will rev up our aptitude to recontextualize without decreasing our aptitude to transform. The capability to integrate virally leads to the aptitude to disintermediate dynamically. We will amplify our ability to enhance without reducing our capacity to leverage. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be real-world, cutting-edge? We realize that if you harness seamlessly then you may also recontextualize compellingly. We believe we know that it is better to grow iteravely than to synergize globally. We will maximize the standard industry industry jargon "cutting-edge". What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Quick: do you have a synergistic plan of action for managing unplanned-for networks? We here at EETimes realize that it is better to optimize extensibly than to deliver transparently. Our technology takes the best features of Python and XSL. Think mega-compelling. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking. The reality-based, C2C2C intuitive, 60/24/7/365 process management factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! The iteration factor is C2B2B. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think C2C2B. We will maximize the capacity of user communities to grow.