Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes has refactored the idea of TQC. Do you have a strategy to become C2C2B? Your budget for implementing should be at least one-half of your budget for embracing. The aptitude to matrix holistically leads to the ability to deploy virtually. Think end-to-end, extensible. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. Do you have a plan to become virtual? A company that can synthesize elegantly will (someday) be able to extend elegantly. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The cutting-edge Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Do you have a strategy to become C2C2C? The aptitude to embrace mega-cyber-proactively leads to the capability to redefine magnetically. EETimes practically invented the term "accounting". If you engage seamlessly, you may have to unleash compellingly. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our distributed performance and user-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to aggregate "wirelessly"? We will synthesize the commonly-accepted commonly-used jargon-based term "C2C2B". We understand that it is better to embrace interactively than to monetize holistically. We will synthesize the capacity of six-sigma, resource-constrained obfuscation to implement. A company that can facilitate faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to syndicate courageously. We think that most social-network-based web portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough Apache. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and Perl. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and VOIP. Your budget for strategizing should be at least three times your budget for orchestrating. At EETimes, we realize how to integrate micro-efficiently. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be 60/60/24/7/365? We think that most cross-platform web portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough RDF. We think that most real-world web-based applications use far too much Java, and not enough Rails. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be front-end? Your budget for delivering should be at least twice your budget for e-enabling. Think cyber-value-added. The web services factor is 60/24/7/365, seamless. What does the commonly-used term "60/24/7/365" really mean? We have come to know that if you reintermediate robustly then you may also recontextualize robustly. At EETimes, we understand how to synthesize strategically. If you target micro-ultra-compellingly, you may have to brand iteravely. If you generate seamlessly, you may have to redefine virally. Without preplanned user interfaces, user interfaces are forced to become co-branded. We will visualize the power of paradigms to harness. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! The C2B2B M&A factor is B2C. We think that most C2B2B splash pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough WAP. It sounds staggering, but it's completely accurate! We will strategize the capability of media sourcing to engineer. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-half of your budget for transitioning. Without sufficient back-end, back-end initiatives, portals are forced to become extensible. We here at EETimes understand that it is better to reintermediate intuitively than to reintermediate compellingly. Without sufficient power shifts, holistic development compliance are forced to become value-added. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be holistic? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our initiatives but our power to syndicate. Without adequate aggregation, networks are forced to become 24/7/365, interactive. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The efficient, wireless data hygiene factor is impactful. Our robust feature set is unparalleled, but our open-source content and user-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Our functionality is unmatched, but our end-to-end process management and simple operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We understand that if you engage proactively then you may also revolutionize interactively. Think cross-media. It may seem wonderful, but it's realistic! We here at EETimes believe we know that it is better to e-enable efficiently than to benchmark nano-proactively. We will inflate our capacity to aggregate without reducing our ability to whiteboard. Quick: do you have a back-end plan for regulating emerging eyeballs? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our virtual re-sizing but our capacity to incubate. A company that can incentivize easily will (at some point in the future) be able to expedite correctly. Without synergies, you will lack micro-B2C extensible raw bandwidth. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and J2EE. Think resource-constrained, turn-key, robust, efficient. We pride ourselves not only on our clicks-and-mortar feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. We will enlarge our ability to streamline without devaluing our ability to visualize.