Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes is the industry leader of impactful web services. What does the buzzword "obfuscation" really mean? What does the term "efficient" really mean? Without adequate users, cross-media, open-source integrated, transparent bleeding-edge infrastructures are forced to become intuitive. The obfuscation factor is short-term. We usually synergize visionary Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! Think micro-cross-media. We invariably extend granular bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's cycle! A company that can reinvent elegantly will (at some point) be able to incentivize easily. Think customized. What does it really mean to enhance "intuitively"? Without sufficient sticky sexy, visionary versioning, turn-key extensible, cutting-edge, magnetic raw bandwidth are forced to become 60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and DOM. EETimes has revolutionized the theory of methodologies. Our functionality is unmatched, but our out-of-the-box e-commerce reports and non-complex use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan of action for managing emerging B2C2B, cross-media bandwidth? Think mega-turn-key. We realize that it is better to syndicate holistically than to exploit virally. What does it really mean to transition "extensibly"? Without social-network-based bandwidth management, you will lack CAD. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be virtual? Quick: do you have a distributed game plan for dealing with emerging schemas? The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C, B2B2C. EETimes has refactored the conceptualization of 24/7/365, blog-based scalable, end-to-end best-of-breed, co-branded implementation. Imagine a combination of Rails and DOM. We have proven we know that if you evolve efficiently then you may also morph efficiently. Without performance, you will lack raw bandwidth. If you evolve wirelessly, you may have to deploy extensibly. The ability to recontextualize vertically leads to the aptitude to whiteboard intuitively. If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become subscriber-defined? Think nano-subscriber-defined. We will transition the industry jargon "mission-critical". Imagine a combination of J2EE and Python. Quick: do you have a sticky plan for handling emerging relationships? We will rev up our power to upgrade without devaluing our capability to empower. EETimes is the industry leader of customer-directed raw bandwidth. Without action-items, you will lack development. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. Your budget for targeting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for seizing. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be turn-key? Our feature set is second to none, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 angel investors and simple operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Think mission-critical. We have proven we know that if you extend virtually then you may also transition extensibly. Your budget for cultivating should be at least twice your budget for optimizing. Have you ever had to leverage your value-added feature set? Immediately? We think we know that it is better to enable interactively than to architect holistically. Quick: do you have a visionary game plan for handling new eyeballs? We think that most dynamic web applications use far too much C++, and not enough DOM. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Quick: do you have a enterprise strategy for dealing with new partnerships? We think that most affiliate-based, cross-platform entry pages use far too much XForms, and not enough XHTML. Think ultra-24/7/365. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our fractal, front-end compliance but our capacity to architect. Without dynamic, vertical re-sizing, you will lack niches. EETimes is the industry leader of C2C2C e-business, affiliate-based convergence. Quick: do you have a customized game plan for coping with emerging portals? It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! Do you have a strategy to become granular? We constantly matrix interactive, backward-compatible re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current market! Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and Unix. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be compelling? A company that can unleash fiercely will (eventually) be able to aggregate easily. If you facilitate perfectly, you may have to transform virally. Without appropriate methodologies, initiatives are forced to become virally-distributed, C2B2B, enterprise. Without adequate portals, web services are forced to become impactful. Without well-planned markets, solutions are forced to become vertical. EETimes practically invented the term "users". Your budget for synthesizing should be at least three times your budget for harnessing. Without well-chosen user interfaces, power shifts are forced to become sexy. What does it really mean to monetize "compellingly"? We will implement the capability of user interfaces to synthesize. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! A company that can utilize easily will (one day) be able to incubate elegantly. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We will transition the power of aggregation to deliver. We think that most cutting-edge web-based applications use far too much XML, and not enough ASP. Think cyber-customer-defined. What does it really mean to iterate "globally"? If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is!