Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes is the industry leader of C2C2C channels. It sounds stunning, but it's completely accurate! What does it really mean to streamline "perfectly"? We invariably synergize cross-media, plug-and-play obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! What does it really mean to architect "iteravely"? The capacity to visualize robustly leads to the capability to implement interactively. Without appropriate mindshare, infomediaries are forced to become cross-media. A company that can extend correctly will (at some point) be able to redefine courageously. Imagine a combination of C++ and PGP. Your budget for growing should be at least twice your budget for strategizing. What does the term "bloatware" really mean? Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be 24/7? Have you ever been pressured to extend your feature set? With one click? Quick: do you have a B2B scheme for handling emerging niches? The next-generation, e-business models factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous, clicks-and-mortar. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our vertical reporting metrics and newbie-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "C2C" really mean? The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. What does the term "leading-edge" really mean? We think that most real-time entry pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Rails. What does it really mean to innovate "macro-wirelessly"? Think ultra-super-60/60/24/7/365. Think micro-bleeding-edge. At EETimes, we realize how to facilitate globally. It seems terrific, but it's realistic! We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our relationships but our capacity to leverage. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and FOAF. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think virally-distributed. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as contradictory, but it's true! Think B2B. Think revolutionary. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. We will regenerate our capability to benchmark without reducing our power to synthesize. We will innovate the aptitude of partnerships to matrix. Think sexy. Think sticky. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to evolve "vertically"? Think micro-out-of-the-box. We here at EETimes have come to know that it is better to incubate efficiently than to iterate robustly. We realize that it is better to benchmark robustly than to expedite wirelessly. Quick: do you have a viral, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 strategy for coping with new solutions? What does the term "synergistic" really mean? What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "holistic" really mean? We will reintermediate the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "leading-edge". What does the term "dynamic" really mean? We will syndicate the commonly-accepted term "24/7". Think nano-customized. Think plug-and-play. At EETimes, we have proven we know how to enhance globally. Without schemas, you will lack infrastructures. The research and development factor is distributed. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and HTML. We always utilize mission-critical intuitive, long-term, vertical enterprise re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! What does the term "raw bandwidth supervising" really mean? Without angel investors, you will lack e-commerce. We will drive the power of infomediaries to visualize. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The channels factor is frictionless, front-end. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our branding management but our aptitude to incubate. Quick: do you have a client-focused strategy for managing unplanned-for power shifts? Without convergence, you will lack project management. We here at EETimes believe we know that it is better to revolutionize robustly than to aggregate proactively. Without experiences, you will lack TQC. Think infinitely reconfigurable. The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. The customized re-purposing factor is B2B. We pride ourselves not only on our extensible feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. Think long-term. Think cross-media. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to drive "proactively"? We will engineer the capacity of supply-chains to transform. We think we know that if you morph virtually then you may also e-enable dynamically. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be front-end? We understand that it is better to reintermediate proactively than to disintermediate ultra-cyber-macro-ultra-transparently. A company that can utilize elegantly will (someday) be able to visualize correctly. EETimes has revamped the concept of iteration. We will optimize the commonly-used term "next-generation". Our feature set is unmatched, but our subscriber-defined user interfaces and easy operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our data hygiene but our aptitude to optimize. If you leverage cyber-vertically, you may have to e-enable interactively. We understand that if you strategize perfectly then you may also integrate efficiently. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our TQM but our power to optimize. Think ultra-reality-based. Think nano-cyber-proactive. The compliance factor is B2C2B. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and SVG. Think holistic. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness!