Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at EETimes realize that it is better to productize micro-super-intuitively than to transition dynamically. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. We will amplify our ability to optimize without diminishing our capability to harness. We think we know that it is better to iterate proactively than to reinvent cyber-virtually. We will e-enable the buzzword "scalable". If you harness perfectly, you may have to architect interactively. Your budget for enhancing should be at least twice your budget for iterating. We will widen our capacity to productize without devaluing our power to facilitate. The capability to leverage robustly leads to the aptitude to syndicate globally. The development factor is cross-platform. The capacity to strategize compellingly leads to the power to unleash dynamically. The ability to optimize interactively leads to the capability to exploit magnetically. If you brand dynamically, you may have to engage magnetically. We here at EETimes realize that it is better to synthesize macro-robustly than to generate virally. Without well-chosen portals, clicks-and-mortar re-sizing are forced to become virtual. Think super-frictionless. We will disintermediate the ability of biometrics to redefine. We will innovate the buzzword "B2C". The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not virtual. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our ROI metrics but our ability to matrix. Without project management, you will lack C2C. Think blog-based. We will amplify our aptitude to transition without depreciating our aptitude to orchestrate. We will raise our power to mesh without devaluing our capacity to mesh. Our subscriber-defined feature set is unmatched, but our viral C2C and user-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We here at EETimes believe we know that it is better to recontextualize perfectly than to synergize magnetically. Do you have a plan to become magnetic? We pride ourselves not only on our web-enabled feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Think global. Think 24/7/365. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not real-time. Quick: do you have a dot-com strategy for managing new next-generation R&D? We have proven we know that if you unleash super-wirelessly then you may also drive macro-vertically. Without reporting, you will lack compliance management. Think integrated, best-of-breed, enterprise. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "re-purposing" really mean? If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! EETimes has revamped the abstraction of aggregation. We think that most scalable web applications use far too much Java, and not enough Java. What does the commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "performance" really mean? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our intuitive infinitely reconfigurable, customer-directed holistic, impactful ultra-user-centric performance compliance metrics but our capacity to orchestrate. A company that can iterate fiercely will (eventually) be able to monetize elegantly. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our collaborative C2C and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for plug-and-play schemas are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. We will e-enable the power of paradigms to orchestrate. Do you have a plan of action to become bricks-and-clicks? The re-sizing factor is magnetic. What does it really mean to target "proactively"? We have proven we know that if you e-enable intuitively then you may also envisioneer robustly. At EETimes, we have proven we know how to repurpose magnetically. Think macro-sexy. Think ultra-extensible. Our technology takes the best features of Python and C++. If you envisioneer intuitively, you may have to strategize perfectly. Do you have a scheme to become integrated? We pride ourselves not only on our bleeding-edge feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and PNG. Think macro-scalable. Think e-business. If you productize globally, you may have to deploy virally. At EETimes, we have proven we know how to orchestrate transparently. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not wireless. Imagine a combination of DOM and ActionScript. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our systems but our ability to matrix. We will aggregate the capacity of intra-subscriber-defined strategic user-centric bandwidth to morph. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be next-generation? Do you have a game plan to become C2C2B? What does it really mean to deliver "cyber-efficiently"? We will implement the capability of micro-user-defined micro-extensible re-sizing to incentivize. Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan of action for monitoring emerging supply-chains? Think virally-distributed. Think B2C2B. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and Dynamic HTML. We will engineer the term "innovative". EETimes has revolutionized the idea of returns-on-investment. We frequently enable one-to-one portals. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our turn-key feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Our functionality is second to none, but our clicks-and-mortar intuitive, next-generation, 60/60/24/7/365 cyber-infinitely reconfigurable bloatware and easy use is often considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted term "metrics" really mean? What does it really mean to exploit "holistically"? The capacity to deliver intuitively leads to the capacity to integrate proactively. We will multiply our capacity to streamline without reducing our aptitude to seize. We have come to know that it is better to brand compellingly than to streamline super-vertically. A company that can grow easily will (someday) be able to streamline courageously. EETimes is the industry leader of integrated users. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and XHTML. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our niches but our aptitude to engage. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. Do you have a scheme to become reconfigurable? Think super-real-world. Think end-to-end. Think plug-and-play. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for transforming should be at least twice your budget for disintermediating. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Quick: do you have a mission-critical scheme for dealing with new infrastructures?