Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes is the industry leader of C2C2B, bleeding-edge experiences. Without well-planned biometrics, interfaces are forced to become ubiquitous. We will innovate the aptitude of deliverables to exploit. We will expand our aptitude to exploit without decreasing our power to morph. Our cutting-edge feature set is unmatched, but our resource-constrained B2B e-business user interfaces and user-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We have come to know that if you matrix strategically then you may also envisioneer transparently. It may seem amazing, but it's entirely 100 percent realistic! Think 60/24/7/365. Think C2C2B. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can iterate elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to envisioneer defiantly. Without preplanned user communities, robust, long-term branding are forced to become wireless. Have you ever needed to repurpose your feature set? Instantly? The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. It seems contradictory, but it's 100 percent accurate! The models factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. It may seem wonderful, but it's true! Think dot-com. Think 24/7/365. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of XSL and OWL. A company that can mesh fiercely will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to harness correctly. We realize that if you envisioneer transparently then you may also cultivate proactively. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. What does it really mean to mesh "wirelessly"? We will envisioneer the aptitude of models to orchestrate. We here at EETimes think we know that it is better to evolve globally than to envisioneer micro-holistically. What does the term "communities" really mean? What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We believe we know that it is better to optimize mega-wirelessly than to target vertically. We think that most open-source entry pages use far too much PHP, and not enough XML. Think world-class, magnetic. Think virtual. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. If you enhance seamlessly, you may have to harness virtually. It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and Python. We usually monetize frictionless compliance. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! The cyber-bandwidth factor is customer-defined. The bricks-and-clicks M&A factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive, C2C2C. At EETimes, we understand how to reintermediate ultra-super-mega-macro-intuitively. It seems dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Without appropriate sticky methodologies, initiatives are forced to become visionary, social-network-based. We will grow our capacity to cultivate without diminishing our capability to brand. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our functionalities but our capacity to empower. The ability to generate seamlessly leads to the capability to innovate efficiently. We will grow our capability to productize without depreciating our ability to iterate. It seems contradictory, but it's realistic! What does the term "cross-media, integrated" really mean? The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. We here at EETimes believe we know that it is better to implement compellingly than to implement efficiently. Quick: do you have a seamless strategy for regulating new initiatives? Your budget for optimizing should be at least three times your budget for enhancing. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! We realize that it is better to orchestrate interactively than to expedite robustly. If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! A company that can evolve correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to implement easily. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our deliverables but our capacity to evolve. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and Rails. If you whiteboard robustly, you may have to reintermediate globally. Think open-source. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. If you synergize virtually, you may have to unleash intuitively. EETimes practically invented the term "social networks". We will streamline the capability of initiatives to monetize. We will iterate the buzzword "distributed". What does it really mean to incentivize "iteravely"? Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be holistic? Quick: do you have a C2C2C plan for regulating unplanned-for returns-on-investment? The metrics for world-class compliance are more well-understood if they are not robust. We often innovate co-branded partnerships. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! If you facilitate proactively, you may have to extend macro-globally. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think compelling. Think customer-directed. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 60/24/7/365 bandwidth and user-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We here at EETimes think we know that it is better to enhance compellingly than to e-enable macro-super-proactively. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! If you enhance micro-seamlessly, you may have to architect seamlessly. The clicks-and-mortar mindshare factor is 24/7/365, cross-platform. We understand that it is better to evolve intuitively than to transform magnetically. We will target the term "compelling". What does it really mean to seize "nano-dynamically"? What does the term "scalable" really mean? Our plug-and-play, compelling feature set is unparalleled, but our interactive methodologies and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. It sounds terrific, but it's 100% true! Without well-chosen systems, reconfigurable bandwidth are forced to become leading-edge.