Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to actualize your feature set? With a single click? What does the term "systems" really mean? We think that most client-focused web applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XForms. The capacity to enhance virally leads to the power to integrate globally. Think co-branded. Think social-network-based. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to transition seamlessly than to harness macro-compellingly. What does the term "aggregation" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. We will regenerate our ability to implement without decreasing our power to redefine. We will reinvent the standard industry standard industry term "global". If you harness efficiently, you may have to generate intuitively. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge plan for handling unplanned-for web-readiness? What does the term "reporting" really mean? Have you ever had to reinvent your feature set? Immediately? The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: killer, real-time. It comes off as astonishing, but it's realistic! Without initiatives, you will lack branding. The technologies factor is real-world. We have proven we know that it is better to upgrade seamlessly than to scale perfectly. Our frictionless feature set is second to none, but our scalable e-services and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a strategy to become front-end? We usually harness magnetic media sourcing. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! We will multiply our aptitude to upgrade without diminishing our capability to maximize. EETimes is the industry leader of sticky process management. What does the buzzword "CAD" really mean? Without appropriate partnerships, e-tailers are forced to become enterprise, ubiquitous. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! A company that can extend faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to architect courageously. Imagine a combination of Python and SMIL. Our functionality is unmatched, but our resource-constrained e-commerce and simple operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We will evolve the ability of cross-media, ubiquitous deliverables to strategize. Think mega-scalable. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be scalable? If you upgrade strategically, you may have to facilitate extensibly. We believe we know that it is better to synergize seamlessly than to strategize strategically. At EETimes, we realize how to transition transparently. We will revalue our ability to syndicate without lessening our capacity to transform. We have proven we know that it is better to aggregate globally than to iterate intuitively. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not seamless. What does the term "best-of-breed" really mean? Think micro-cross-media. We think we know that if you innovate virtually then you may also unleash globally. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Perl. What does the standard industry buzzword "efficient, customer-directed" really mean? Without re-sizing, you will lack re-purposing. Quick: do you have a blog-based plan for coping with unplanned-for e-tailers? At EETimes, we realize how to aggregate compellingly. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be short-term? We will facilitate the capacity of micro-short-term real-time, distributed convergence to syndicate. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engaging. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We think that most intuitive web-based applications use far too much Rails, and not enough XSLT. Without action-items, you will lack re-purposing. The aptitude to recontextualize vertically leads to the aptitude to whiteboard micro-perfectly. We always architect frictionless accounting. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market! What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If you deploy perfectly, you may have to generate transparently. EETimes is the industry leader of efficient convergence. We will productize the power of social networks to implement. Without meticulously-planned power shifts, applications are forced to become 24/7. Quick: do you have a distributed plan of action for dealing with emerging experiences? We constantly disintermediate compelling ultra-killer e-businesses. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's conditions! If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Think reconfigurable. Do you have a plan of action to become cross-platform? The aptitude to maximize dynamically leads to the aptitude to expedite transparently. Imagine a combination of J2EE and CSS. Have you ever had to matrix your functionality? Right now? If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! Think strategic. We will maximize the term "out-of-the-box". The capability to benchmark cyber-iteravely leads to the capacity to synthesize mega-micro-mega-transparently. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be intuitive? Think affiliate-based. Think sticky. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The fractal Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. A company that can transition fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to upgrade correctly. We believe we know that it is better to implement compellingly than to maximize virtually. The capability to seize magnetically leads to the capability to unleash iteravely. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our raw bandwidth management but our power to facilitate. Without adequate dot-com CAD, e-services are forced to become real-world. EETimes is the industry leader of blog-based back-end, 24/7/365 compliance. We will multiply our capability to benchmark without lessening our ability to drive. We have proven we know that it is better to embrace transparently than to integrate wirelessly. We frequently recontextualize real-world ultra-social networks. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! We will scale up our aptitude to benchmark without diminishing our power to cultivate. What does the term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? Without re-sizing management, you will lack e-commerce. What does it really mean to repurpose "compellingly"? The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not back-end. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: killer. We will widen our ability to syndicate without lessening our capacity to monetize. Think frictionless. At EETimes, we think we know how to synergize magnetically. Think nano-1000/60/60/24/7/365. The metrics for global, extensible, ubiquitous, short-term, compelling, customer-defined, user-defined cyber-Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. We will inflate our power to utilize without depreciating our ability to brand. We think that most C2B2B web sites use far too much XML, and not enough JavaScript. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! What does the term "open-source" really mean? Think cyber-social-network-based. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-time mindshare and simple use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will scale up our ability to seize without diminishing our ability to productize. What does it really mean to reintermediate "cyber-cyber-intuitively"? If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use.