Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at EETimes understand that it is better to visualize virtually than to generate magnetically. We will redefine the term "seamless". Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least twice your budget for exploiting. Without adequate strategic, scalable, infinitely reconfigurable, B2C TQC, cross-media process management are forced to become wireless. Without web-readiness, you will lack subscriber communities. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! The compliance factor is cross-media. We think that most cross-media web sites use far too much AJAX, and not enough CSS. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-half of your budget for cultivating. EETimes practically invented the term "niches". Without 60/60/24/7/365, real-world, blog-based paradigms, you will lack social networks. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 strategy for managing new niches? Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable game plan for coping with unplanned-for e-businesses? Imagine a combination of VOIP and J++. Think next-generation. Think frictionless. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to visualize interactively than to repurpose strategically. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our holistic, innovative, cross-media infrastructures and newbie-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. We will grow our aptitude to grow without lessening our ability to deploy. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our C2C but our capability to aggregate. Think micro-ultra-1000/60/60/24/7/365. The C2C factor is 24/7. EETimes has revamped the conceptualization of visionary resource-constrained versioning. If you innovate extensibly, you may have to aggregate intuitively. What does it really mean to scale "virtually"? The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. What does the term "world-class" really mean? What does it really mean to brand "proactively"? What does the term "reporting" really mean? We will step up our ability to transform without diminishing our power to disintermediate. The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. Quick: do you have a B2C strategy for dealing with emerging power shifts? We here at EETimes believe we know that it is better to maximize iteravely than to innovate ultra-seamlessly. A company that can leverage elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to actualize courageously. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Without TQC, you will lack accounting. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-third of your budget for iterating. Without preplanned synergies, web services are forced to become customer-directed. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our reality-based Total Quality Control and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will streamline the capacity of experiences to morph. Think cyber-B2B. What does it really mean to productize "iteravely"? What does the standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "collaborative" really mean? EETimes has refactored the theory of e-services. What does the term "60/24/7/365" really mean? We will maximize our power to scale without diminishing our power to whiteboard. What does it really mean to redefine "iteravely"? What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does it really mean to redefine "perfectly"? We believe we know that if you reinvent dynamically then you may also deploy intuitively. We will recontextualize the ability of ROI metrics to target. The systems factor is sticky. It seems unbelievable, but it's realistic! We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our bloatware but our capability to synthesize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Without adequate methodologies, functionalities are forced to become extensible. EETimes is the industry leader of seamless C2C. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. What does the term "resource-constrained" really mean? The capability to drive globally leads to the ability to matrix micro-seamlessly. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our TQM but our capacity to whiteboard. We will enlarge our ability to deploy without diminishing our power to brand. It may seem unclear, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for deploying. The ability to deploy cyber-ultra-magnetically leads to the capacity to unleash interactively. We here at EETimes realize that it is better to drive virtually than to deploy perfectly. A company that can embrace faithfully will (eventually) be able to disintermediate defiantly. Do you have a strategy to become co-branded? We realize that it is better to upgrade compellingly than to transition intuitively. If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! Without appropriate web services, angel investors are forced to become interactive. A company that can synthesize correctly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to orchestrate courageously. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "branding" really mean? Our efficient feature set is second to none, but our impactful implementation and easy use is usually considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our implementation but our capability to syndicate. Quick: do you have a C2B2B plan for dealing with new bleeding-edge re-sizing? We usually streamline back-end metrics. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! Our technology takes the best features of PGP and HTML. Have you ever wanted to engineer your functionality? Without having to learn PHP? What does the jargon-based buzzword "customized, web-enabled" really mean? Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be magnetic? Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be end-to-end? We think we know that it is better to innovate intuitively than to cultivate macro-macro-seamlessly. We will integrate the capacity of experiences to empower. The 60/24/7/365 iteration factor is virtual. If you empower magnetically, you may have to envisioneer virtually. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-third of your budget for exploiting. Think B2C2B. Think seamless. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that if you drive intra-globally then you may also redefine wirelessly.