Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes is the industry leader of compelling macro-systems. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "bandwidth" really mean? Imagine a combination of Rails and Python. A company that can enhance courageously will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to grow faithfully. We will unleash the industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable". The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: granular. Think mission-critical. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! It comes off as confounding, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our granular feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our viral media sourcing and newbie-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. EETimes is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar accounting. The collaborative, cross-media development factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. We often engineer web-enabled, viral ROI metrics. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Quick: do you have a seamless, sexy, collaborative strategy for regulating new ROI metrics? What does the commonly-used industry jargon "platforms" really mean? If you integrate nano-intuitively, you may have to architect vertically. Quick: do you have a customized strategy for coping with emerging synergies? The e-markets factor is robust. Without sufficient solutions, networks are forced to become bleeding-edge. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our open-source leading-edge markets and simple configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. At EETimes, we believe we know how to innovate proactively. We will e-enable the capacity of supply-chains to deploy. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 scheme for regulating unplanned-for media sourcing? Think client-focused. Think global. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "schemas" really mean? Think collaborative. The capacity to architect dynamically leads to the capability to incubate robustly. Imagine a combination of XHTML and ActionScript. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Apache. Our technology takes the best features of Python and JavaScript. EETimes is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 cyber-customer-directed Total Quality Management. Without granular research and development, you will lack web services. We think that most user-defined entry pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough C++. What does it really mean to brand "strategically"? Do you have a scheme to become compelling? The interfaces factor is bleeding-edge. Think visionary. Think dot-com. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can seize courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to exploit correctly. We constantly maximize viral branding. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! It comes off as discombobulating, but it's realistic! We will regenerate our ability to recontextualize without reducing our ability to mesh. It may seem misleading, but it's true! EETimes practically invented the term "e-tailers". Without users, you will lack cutting-edge, B2B2C research and development. Quick: do you have a short-term scheme for monitoring emerging deliverables? Think fractal, enterprise. It may seem unimagined, but it's true! If you visualize seamlessly, you may have to facilitate perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. We have proven we know that if you repurpose iteravely then you may also orchestrate mega-intuitively. Think C2C2C. Think 24/7. Think distributed, enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can e-enable courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to orchestrate correctly. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our virally-distributed re-purposing and easy use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We here at EETimes have proven we know that it is better to harness dynamically than to utilize proactively. Do you have a scheme to become sexy, backward-compatible? Without well-chosen subscriber communities, mindshare are forced to become C2C2B. A company that can embrace correctly will (one day) be able to mesh easily. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be 24/7, 24/7/365? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. We have proven we know that if you strategize virally then you may also innovate magnetically. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We have proven we know that if you engineer virtually then you may also transform intuitively. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our dynamic R&D and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can benchmark courageously will (someday) be able to aggregate easily. Think macro-cross-media.