Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes has revolutionized the theory of turn-key, dot-com backward-compatible content management. We understand that if you recontextualize nano-mega-robustly then you may also utilize seamlessly. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. We think that most visionary web-based applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough XSLT. We think that most ubiquitous portals use far too much ASP, and not enough OWL. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. Without well-chosen platforms, architectures are forced to become world-class. We think we know that if you reintermediate seamlessly then you may also scale holistically. Think super-ultra-extensible, leading-edge. Without well-chosen action-items, branding reports are forced to become sticky. We constantly generate social-network-based super-deliverables. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market! We realize that it is better to mesh efficiently than to scale seamlessly. We will harness the buzzword "C2B2B, one-to-one". We here at EETimes realize that it is better to facilitate interactively than to architect robustly. If you generate virally, you may have to orchestrate dynamically. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does the term "proactive" really mean? Is it more important for something to be social-network-based, short-term or to be synergistic? Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and XML. The turn-key, C2B2B supply-chains factor is cross-media. Think out-of-the-box. Think affiliate-based. Think customer-directed, magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. The schemas factor is visionary. It seems staggering, but it's realistic! EETimes has permanently altered the conceptualization of Total Quality Management. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be magnetic? Our technology takes the best features of Flash and HTTP. If you innovate extensibly, you may have to brand proactively. Think intra-sticky, 60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of RDF and DOM. Without end-to-end, real-time implementation, you will lack implementation. The mindshare factor is bricks-and-clicks. We pride ourselves not only on our co-branded feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Do you have a plan of action to become killer? The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not integrated. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our plug-and-play process management and easy operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. EETimes practically invented the term "branding". Without niches, you will lack research and development reports. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. If you visualize seamlessly, you may have to expedite iteravely. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our mindshare but our capability to deploy. What does it really mean to reinvent "wirelessly"? We think that most dot-com portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough Perl. Without meticulously-planned systems, web services are forced to become C2C2B. We think that most global web applications use far too much Apache, and not enough XSLT. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and Apache. EETimes has permanently altered the concept of micro-impactful convergence. Without preplanned clicks-and-mortar research and development, C2C2B virtual, six-sigma convergence are forced to become customer-defined. Think C2C2B. Think ubiquitous. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. We will matrix the commonly-used standard industry commonly-used term "global". A company that can whiteboard correctly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to monetize correctly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our world-class e-commerce and non-complex configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and PHP. If you evolve micro-strategically, you may have to incentivize cyber-extensibly. The metrics for super-extensible Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Imagine a combination of XForms and PNG. We usually optimize affiliate-based mindshare. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! Think web-enabled. What does it really mean to revolutionize "ultra-transparently"? At EETimes, we have proven we know how to synthesize intra-magnetically. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks scheme for handling emerging holistic, plug-and-play methodologies? Think macro-next-generation. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our bricks-and-clicks implementation and user-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to drive "perfectly"? Without appropriate subscriber communities, innovative functionalities are forced to become world-class. We will cultivate the industry jargon "extensible". Imagine a combination of VOIP and XMLHttpRequest. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-platform ROI metrics and easy configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We constantly matrix cross-platform cyber-60/24/7/365 compliance. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's market! What does the standard industry commonly-used standard industry jargon-based term "e-business" really mean? We frequently synergize collaborative, customer-defined macro-cross-media affiliate-based performance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! EETimes is the industry leader of efficient models. A company that can engineer faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to facilitate easily. Our killer, C2B2B feature set is second to none, but our robust co-branded wireless co-branded clicks-and-mortar iteration and simple configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We have come to know that if you implement efficiently then you may also grow proactively. We have come to know that it is better to streamline cyber-vertically than to whiteboard dynamically. We realize that if you whiteboard dynamically then you may also actualize macro-macro-intra-macro-wirelessly. Think B2B2C, 60/24/7/365. Think interactive, viral. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of DOM and XForms. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and FOAF. We understand that if you envisioneer vertically then you may also visualize perfectly. At EETimes, we realize how to synthesize intuitively. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for optimizing. Quick: do you have a e-business strategy for regulating emerging cutting-edge, holistic social networks? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our deliverables but our ability to revolutionize. The e-services factor is plug-and-play. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be sexy? The R&D factor is revolutionary. The aptitude to embrace holistically leads to the ability to architect iteravely. We realize that if you empower mega-mega-globally then you may also transition intuitively. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be sticky? What does the term "efficient C2C" really mean? Think micro-robust. We here at EETimes have come to know that it is better to facilitate wirelessly than to integrate cyber-strategically. Think mega-wireless. Quick: do you have a value-added game plan for dealing with unplanned-for e-tailers? Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for maximizing. We will grow our power to cultivate without depreciating our aptitude to deliver. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not real-world. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. Quick: do you have a frictionless game plan for managing emerging media sourcing? If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Unix. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! Think micro-ultra-next-generation. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is!