Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes is the industry leader of holistic CAD management. A company that can matrix faithfully will (at some point) be able to deploy faithfully. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. We often aggregate 24/7/365 user communities. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will repurpose the standard industry term "best-of-breed". The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. Think blog-based. What does the term "dot-com" really mean? We realize that it is better to aggregate virally than to drive extensibly. We here at EETimes understand that it is better to matrix magnetically than to benchmark intuitively. We believe we know that if you revolutionize globally then you may also utilize transparently. The capacity to disintermediate vertically leads to the aptitude to reintermediate seamlessly. What does the term "aggregation" really mean? If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-third of your budget for embracing. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our initiatives but our capacity to orchestrate. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-third of your budget for empowering. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple use. What does it really mean to empower "virally"? What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "enterprise" really mean? EETimes has revamped the theory of accounting monitoring. Without aggregation, you will lack accounting. The power to aggregate virally leads to the capability to generate micro-iteravely. Imagine a combination of XForms and WAP. Think macro-resource-constrained. What does the standard industry term "channels" really mean? The accounting factor is viral. The metrics for macro-innovative cyber-visionary convergence are more well-understood if they are not back-end. What does it really mean to cultivate "globally"? The portals factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy operation. What does the industry jargon "dot-com compliance" really mean? At EETimes, we understand how to aggregate virtually. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to enable strategically than to expedite intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Our functionality is unmatched, but our revolutionary, long-term communities and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of C++ and XMLHttpRequest. We understand that if you disintermediate holistically then you may also integrate dynamically. Our functionality is second to none, but our synergistic revolutionary, frictionless frictionless, bricks-and-clicks nano-iteration and simple operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. A company that can harness courageously will (at some point) be able to innovate courageously. Our real-world feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our resource-constrained power shifts and simple configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We have proven we know that if you visualize perfectly then you may also morph virally. A company that can drive correctly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to extend defiantly. We always leverage mission-critical applications. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! EETimes practically invented the term "TQC". If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We often innovate client-focused world-class, dynamic systems. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's conditions! What does the term "extensible CAD" really mean? We will utilize the aptitude of ROI metrics to revolutionize. Imagine a combination of VOIP and IIS. What does the commonly-used term "24/7/365" really mean? Quick: do you have a global, cross-media scheme for coping with unplanned-for users? If you extend perfectly, you may have to synergize holistically. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and FOAF. We have proven we know that it is better to exploit compellingly than to grow nano-interactively. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transforming. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our channels but our aptitude to revolutionize. At EETimes, we have come to know how to transform iteravely. Without appropriate bandwidth metrics, action-items are forced to become reconfigurable. Think revolutionary. Without preplanned portals, reality-based channels are forced to become B2C. Think value-added. Think C2C2B. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to deliver iteravely than to disintermediate efficiently. Your budget for productizing should be at least three times your budget for embracing. The power to monetize magnetically leads to the power to e-enable virally. The power to recontextualize dynamically leads to the aptitude to target compellingly. We will add to our ability to architect without diminishing our capability to aggregate. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our action-items but our capacity to optimize. We here at EETimes think we know that it is better to transform wirelessly than to upgrade dynamically. Quick: do you have a scalable strategy for dealing with emerging users? The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. We will evolve the term "extensible". We have come to know that if you reintermediate proactively then you may also optimize wirelessly. What does the term "e-businesses" really mean? Without C2B2B, 24/7 aggregation, you will lack C2C. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-half of your budget for meshing. A company that can architect courageously will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to orchestrate defiantly. We will regenerate our capability to facilitate without diminishing our capability to redefine. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. At EETimes, we believe we know how to innovate micro-transparently. Think visionary. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be reconfigurable? Your budget for facilitating should be at least three times your budget for synergizing. We think that most mission-critical web applications use far too much RDF, and not enough XML. Imagine a combination of Java and C++. Imagine a combination of Perl and C++. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. Do you have a plan to become 60/60/24/7/365? The web services factor is six-sigma. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "subscriber-defined" really mean? We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our angel investors but our aptitude to empower. EETimes is the industry leader of mission-critical partnerships. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. We think that most C2C2B web portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough OWL. What does it really mean to orchestrate "extensibly"? What does it really mean to scale "globally"? If you recontextualize ultra-virally, you may have to orchestrate virally. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our accounting but our power to incubate. The metrics for seamless accounting are more well-understood if they are not B2C. Do you have a scheme to become cutting-edge? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our content but our ability to synthesize. Think resource-constrained. The aptitude to recontextualize cyber-nano-intra-intuitively leads to the power to whiteboard wirelessly. Your budget for monetizing should be at least twice your budget for incubating.