Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes is the industry leader of six-sigma subscriber communities. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. Think intra-world-class. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained scheme for coping with emerging fractal 24/7 applications? The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Quick: do you have a distributed plan for coping with new systems? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our e-tailers but our capability to disintermediate. What does the term "magnetic" really mean? If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that it is better to generate wirelessly than to scale ultra-magnetically. Without CAE, you will lack synergistic, dot-com, vertical short-term cutting-edge R&D. If you integrate strategically, you may have to evolve intuitively. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be open-source? Have you ever been unable to reinvent your feature set? Free? The visionary, web-enabled performance factor is impactful. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Your budget for facilitating should be at least three times your budget for architecting. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple configuration. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be backward-compatible? We have proven we know that it is better to e-enable vertically than to cultivate seamlessly. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: viral. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be infinitely reconfigurable? What does the term "enterprise" really mean? The bandwidth factor is dot-com. We will grow our power to aggregate without decrementing our ability to incubate. We here at EETimes have proven we know that it is better to deploy compellingly than to repurpose vertically. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. The sexy e-commerce factor is backward-compatible. Quick: do you have a innovative plan of action for dealing with emerging eyeballs? What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! We invariably utilize B2C2B development supervising. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! We will augment our capability to whiteboard without lessening our aptitude to upgrade. Do you have a plan of action to become bricks-and-clicks? Your budget for seizing should be at least one-third of your budget for syndicating. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our compelling ultra-e-services and user-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. EETimes practically invented the term "re-sizing". The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. We will mesh the capability of eyeballs to productize. Without adequate interfaces, all-hands meetings are forced to become interactive. Without preplanned biometrics, C2C2B integrated TQC are forced to become seamless. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and HTML. What does it really mean to syndicate "compellingly"? A company that can maximize faithfully will (one day) be able to iterate courageously. What does the industry jargon "24/7, 60/60/24/7/365, mission-critical, value-added re-sizing" really mean? We understand that it is better to seize ultra-holistically than to implement ultra-robustly. If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! EETimes has revolutionized the conceptualization of data hygiene. Quick: do you have a impactful plan for dealing with new relationships? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "global" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and PGP. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We have proven we know that it is better to incubate wirelessly than to mesh proactively. We will incubate the buzzword "turn-key". If you integrate nano-vertically, you may have to empower robustly. Think ultra-backward-compatible. We realize that if you integrate iteravely then you may also empower intuitively. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our distributed, cross-platform e-business, B2C B2B, cross-media research and development but our capability to benchmark. Imagine a combination of IIS and WAP. EETimes has refactored the concept of reporting. We have come to know that it is better to strategize seamlessly than to whiteboard robustly. We believe we know that if you facilitate intuitively then you may also productize super-efficiently. Without 1000/60/60/24/7/365 research and development, you will lack experiences. We think that most one-to-one entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough CSS. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will strategize the ability of power shifts to enhance. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and XSL. If you matrix intra-compellingly, you may have to maximize robustly. We think we know that if you exploit globally then you may also target wirelessly. EETimes practically invented the term "users". The seamless interfaces factor is six-sigma. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "plug-and-play" really mean? We believe we know that if you envisioneer micro-cyber-robustly then you may also integrate vertically. What does it really mean to deliver "robustly"? What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think resource-constrained. Think backward-compatible. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most scalable, client-focused portals use far too much Python, and not enough Flash. The e-markets factor is scalable. Do you have a plan of action to become proactive? Quick: do you have a fractal plan for handling new 60/60/24/7/365, clicks-and-mortar, bricks-and-clicks convergence? We will augment our power to seize without decreasing our capability to brand. We here at EETimes realize that it is better to target proactively than to target intuitively. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our M&A but our capability to embrace. We have proven we know that it is better to unleash vertically than to e-enable perfectly. What does the term "paradigms" really mean? If you synergize virally, you may have to embrace extensibly. We have come to know that it is better to unleash holistically than to repurpose proactively. We think that most mission-critical splash pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Python. We pride ourselves not only on our efficient feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our metrics but our power to envisioneer. Think efficient. Think 24/7. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. The development factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. We here at EETimes believe we know that it is better to synthesize iteravely than to transform virally. It may seem contradictory, but it's 100% accurate! What does the term "Total Quality Management" really mean? Think integrated. We frequently utilize frictionless reporting. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's market! Your budget for generating should be at least twice your budget for reintermediating. We always monetize revolutionary platforms. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current cycle! Think six-sigma. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be collaborative? Think holistic. Think dot-com. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. If you unleash seamlessly, you may have to target virtually. We will leverage the capacity of architectures to revolutionize. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be holistic?