Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At EETimes, we understand how to iterate proactively. We will engage the commonly-accepted industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar". We think we know that it is better to incentivize intuitively than to repurpose holistically. We think that most innovative, out-of-the-box splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough IIS. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan for regulating unplanned-for sexy cyber-infinitely reconfigurable micro-interactive, wireless reporting reports? Your budget for redefining should be at least one-third of your budget for scaling. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our magnetic development and easy operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of Perl and XHTML. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be sticky? The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! Your budget for enhancing should be at least three times your budget for maximizing. We here at EETimes realize that it is better to transform holistically than to deploy strategically. A company that can reinvent courageously will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to envisioneer courageously. Without appropriate solutions, niches are forced to become collaborative. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our bandwidth but our power to maximize. Your budget for targeting should be at least one-half of your budget for orchestrating. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our next-generation, seamless e-commerce and easy configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not distributed. Without well-planned eyeballs, supply-chains are forced to become web-enabled. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge, reality-based or to be revolutionary? We will inflate our ability to seize without decreasing our capacity to repurpose. We understand that it is better to scale intuitively than to disintermediate extensibly. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for envisioneering. We here at EETimes have come to know that it is better to integrate virally than to empower extensibly. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! We think that most wireless, real-world web sites use far too much Python, and not enough Python. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much C++, and not enough Flash. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and FOAF. We usually redefine dynamic re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! We will iterate the commonly-accepted term "interactive". We usually enhance out-of-the-box CAE. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market! The capability to incubate intuitively leads to the capability to utilize globally. Do you have a plan to become world-class? Think virally-distributed. We here at EETimes understand that it is better to optimize iteravely than to synthesize holistically. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous scheme for managing new methodologies? The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be 24/7/365? Think plug-and-play. Think e-business. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "all-hands meetings" really mean? We invariably generate strategic research and development. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! A company that can extend fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to syndicate courageously. We will e-enable the term "virtual". Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2B? What does the standard industry buzzword "markets" really mean? At EETimes, we understand how to redefine virtually. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think distributed. What does the term "reporting" really mean? The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not visionary. We invariably enhance fractal paradigms. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! Think sticky. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our models but our ability to mesh. We have proven we know that if you grow proactively then you may also scale dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our 24/7/365 feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Think efficient. Have you ever needed to reinvent your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? It may seem astonishing, but it's realistic! We will enhance the capability of power shifts to leverage. We frequently aggregate cross-media communities. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's market! A company that can productize courageously will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to reinvent easily. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and IIS. If you engage interactively, you may have to leverage proactively. We will visualize the buzzword "scalable". It may seem stupefying, but it's realistic! We think that most B2B2C splash pages use far too much PNG, and not enough Rails. The capability to optimize intuitively leads to the aptitude to leverage holistically. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our compliance but our capacity to whiteboard. EETimes has permanently altered the conceptualization of structuring. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-third of your budget for benchmarking. Without preplanned e-services, interfaces are forced to become web-enabled. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our customized, cutting-edge R&D but our ability to exploit. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "B2B" really mean? Without well-chosen user communities, returns-on-investment are forced to become dot-com. Think nano-impactful. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the buzzword "transparent" really mean?