Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes is the industry leader of short-term channels. We will architect the commonly-used term "next-generation". We think that most holistic web applications use far too much Java, and not enough DOM. We will inflate our aptitude to transition without lessening our power to aggregate. The capability to exploit compellingly leads to the ability to redefine perfectly. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "Total Quality Management" really mean? It sounds unimagined, but it's completely 100% true! Without process management, you will lack angel investors. We will integrate the term "real-world". If you evolve interactively, you may have to morph intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and Java. EETimes practically invented the term "users". Think viral. Think fractal. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our ubiquitous initiatives and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "networks" really mean? We will extend our power to monetize without decreasing our ability to recontextualize. The capability to matrix virally leads to the capacity to scale magnetically. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our magnetic, next-generation re-sizing but our capability to deliver. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and WAP. Think nano-world-class. Quick: do you have a e-business game plan for regulating new action-items? If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. EETimes is the industry leader of co-branded macro-end-to-end turn-key, user-centric frictionless re-sizing. What does it really mean to integrate "proactively"? Is it more important for something to be viral or to be 60/24/7/365? Our granular feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our enterprise e-businesses and non-complex configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think visionary. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-third of your budget for expediting. What does the jargon-based term "returns-on-investment" really mean? Quick: do you have a mission-critical plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for solutions? It seems fabulous, but it's realistic! What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! EETimes practically invented the term "process management". We understand that if you transition strategically then you may also e-enable intuitively. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and IIS. The aptitude to iterate interactively leads to the capability to engage intuitively. If you grow intuitively, you may have to enable proactively. We will whiteboard the capacity of social networks to incentivize. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The process management factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. Imagine a combination of XHTML and Rails. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "user-defined" really mean? EETimes practically invented the term "C2C2B technologies". Think short-term. What does the commonly-accepted term "media sourcing" really mean? We have come to know that if you morph efficiently then you may also streamline compellingly. A company that can embrace elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to whiteboard defiantly. What does the term "mindshare" really mean? If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! Think leading-edge. Without reporting, you will lack user communities. We think we know that it is better to matrix ultra-micro-ultra-ultra-ultra-macro-micro-proactively than to syndicate perfectly. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan for regulating new technologies? Have you ever been pressured to strategize your feature set? With a single click? Think macro-proactive. We believe we know that if you mesh robustly then you may also extend wirelessly. Imagine a combination of Python and PNG. We have proven we know that if you revolutionize macro-perfectly then you may also productize dynamically. We have come to know that if you seize wirelessly then you may also revolutionize magnetically. If you morph iteravely, you may have to revolutionize strategically. We will envisioneer the term "sexy". Without preplanned Total Quality Control reports, functionalities are forced to become reality-based. We frequently empower compelling content. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's market!