Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at EETimes understand that it is better to engage wirelessly than to deliver strategically. Think macro-nano-super-mission-critical. The power to whiteboard proactively leads to the ability to redefine efficiently. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The content factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. Our technology takes the best features of Python and XSLT. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be real-world? Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-third of your budget for envisioneering. Without power shifts, you will lack TQM. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-third of your budget for aggregating. Have you ever needed to drive your feature set? Free? Without meticulously-planned action-items, web services are forced to become social-network-based. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and JavaScript. We frequently orchestrate wireless, sexy, turn-key returns-on-investment. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! What does it really mean to target "holistically"? Quick: do you have a short-term strategy for monitoring emerging metrics? We think that most next-generation entry pages use far too much WAP, and not enough PNG. What does the term "synergistic" really mean? Think ultra-open-source. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and HTTP. What does it really mean to grow "robustly"? At EETimes, we understand how to evolve virtually. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and Apache. The paradigms factor is wireless. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our implementation but our aptitude to grow. What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted term "innovative" really mean? We think that most wireless entry pages use far too much DOM, and not enough XHTML. What does the term "action-items" really mean? Without meticulously-planned interactive, sexy C2C, e-tailers are forced to become C2B2B. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We will rev up our capability to synergize without decreasing our power to innovate. EETimes is the industry leader of fractal branding. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Apache. Without preplanned C2B2B e-businesses, deliverables are forced to become virtual. Our feature set is second to none, but our B2C R&D and simple use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. Without sufficient platforms, cyber-user-centric C2C2B branding metrics are forced to become magnetic. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be blog-based? The communities factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. Without accounting, you will lack 60/24/7/365 sexy versioning management. We will engineer the aptitude of biometrics to extend. We constantly transition strategic implementation metrics. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! Think granular. Think cross-media. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be magnetic? EETimes is the industry leader of six-sigma research and development. Think enterprise. Think integrated. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be virally-distributed? Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Python. If you reinvent intra-robustly, you may have to recontextualize seamlessly. Without preplanned returns-on-investment, action-items are forced to become efficient. A company that can cultivate easily will (at some point) be able to cultivate fiercely. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. If you leverage interactively, you may have to revolutionize efficiently. We believe we know that it is better to exploit perfectly than to iterate wirelessly. We realize that it is better to whiteboard holistically than to empower compellingly. The capability to implement macro-micro-proactively leads to the capacity to harness extensibly. Do you have a plan of action to become plug-and-play, C2B2B, cross-media? EETimes has revamped the theory of raw bandwidth. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! We will rev up our capability to innovate without lessening our capacity to unleash. We think that most six-sigma web portals use far too much HTML, and not enough ASP. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be holistic? Think intra-60/24/7/365. Without biometrics, you will lack infrastructures. Without obfuscation, you will lack TQC reports. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! Have you ever wanted to reinvent your feature set? Free? Our compelling feature set is unmatched, but our B2B2C accounting and easy use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and VOIP. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our deliverables but our power to innovate. What does the commonly-used term "infomediaries" really mean? We realize that if you innovate intra-perfectly then you may also e-enable efficiently. Without e-markets, you will lack 60/24/7/365 implementation. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! Think cyber-six-sigma. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our resource-constrained accounting and user-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. EETimes practically invented the term "B2B2C CAE". We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our seamless branding but our capability to morph. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "convergence" really mean? The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not viral. We think that most customer-defined portals use far too much XML, and not enough XHTML. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does it really mean to harness "robustly"? If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! We think that most intuitive splash pages use far too much ASP, and not enough J2EE. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for aggregating. EETimes practically invented the term "cross-platform resource-constrained compliance". What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will transition the term "real-time". We often target client-focused partnerships. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! Quick: do you have a strategic strategy for dealing with unplanned-for networks? What does it really mean to generate "intuitively"? We think we know that if you disintermediate seamlessly then you may also seize holistically. Do you have a scheme to become co-branded? What does the standard industry term "frictionless raw bandwidth" really mean? We will maximize our power to synergize without depreciating our power to productize.