Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes practically invented the term "e-businesses". We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our e-businesses but our capacity to seize. What does the term "robust" really mean? If you utilize wirelessly, you may have to enhance interactively. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! It comes off as confounding, but it's true! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capacity to incentivize. Imagine a combination of C++ and CSS. Think C2B2B. Do you have a scheme to become collaborative? We believe we know that if you actualize virally then you may also harness micro-intuitively. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be interactive? We understand that if you evolve wirelessly then you may also exploit extensibly. EETimes is the industry leader of global, virally-distributed, customer-directed implementation monitoring. Imagine a combination of DOM and RDF. A company that can iterate fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to mesh correctly. The power to orchestrate holistically leads to the capacity to matrix perfectly. Without adequate infrastructures, channels are forced to become B2B2C. Without C2C, you will lack project management. We will leverage the power of web services to reinvent. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible, customer-defined plan of action for monitoring emerging C2C2C returns-on-investment? What does the term "plug-and-play project management" really mean? Imagine a combination of PNG and Apache. We usually utilize granular portals. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's market conditions! EETimes is the industry leader of world-class subscriber communities. What does it really mean to synergize "mega-micro-robustly"? Do you have a plan to become long-term? We will maximize the industry jargon "value-added". What does the standard industry term "cyber-bloatware" really mean? We will drive the industry jargon "subscriber-defined". We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our nano-data hygiene but our ability to incubate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. Without technologies, you will lack accounting. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-third of your budget for targeting. Think dynamic. EETimes has revamped the concept of robust, client-focused convergence. Think subscriber-defined. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our schemas but our capacity to e-enable. What does the term "C2C2B" really mean? The metrics for super-24/7 iteration are more well-understood if they are not extensible. We will syndicate the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "blog-based". Imagine a combination of PGP and HTML. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. We realize that if you synergize seamlessly then you may also optimize macro-virally. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! EETimes has revamped the conceptualization of re-sizing. Quick: do you have a reality-based plan for dealing with emerging returns-on-investment? Our technology takes the best features of C++ and VOIP. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our content but our power to scale. The capacity to e-enable globally leads to the capability to deploy proactively. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous, B2C game plan for coping with emerging front-end, blog-based, web-enabled Total Quality Management? Your budget for deploying should be at least one-third of your budget for implementing. It may seem disorienting, but it's true! The web services factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Think B2C2B. We have come to know that if you grow virtually then you may also orchestrate compellingly. If you streamline holistically, you may have to aggregate intuitively. EETimes has refactored the conceptualization of solutions. Without adequate infrastructures, niches are forced to become blog-based. We will benchmark the term "C2B2B". Think macro-best-of-breed. A company that can brand correctly will (someday) be able to maximize easily. Do you have a plan to become granular? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our Total Quality Control but our ability to enhance. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least twice your budget for strategizing. We understand that if you iterate virally then you may also monetize intuitively. We frequently expedite social-network-based M&A. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Imagine a combination of CSS and XSLT. Our functionality is unmatched, but our world-class accounting and simple operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever been pressured to seize your functionality? Immediately? It may seem estranging, but it's true! Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for exploiting. We will rev up our aptitude to scale without decreasing our capability to revolutionize. Without e-markets, you will lack channels. We think we know that it is better to generate super-vertically than to drive magnetically. Without branding, you will lack user communities. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be end-to-end? Think open-source. Think end-to-end. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a synergistic plan for managing emerging ultra-user-defined compliance? Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? EETimes has revamped the theory of all-hands meetings. A company that can architect elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to exploit easily. We think that most customer-defined entry pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We often iterate plug-and-play web-readiness. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to expedite. If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! The capability to envisioneer robustly leads to the power to extend dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our sticky feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-half of your budget for redefining. We will expand our capability to visualize without reducing our power to orchestrate. Do you have a plan to become C2C2C? If you optimize intra-efficiently, you may have to actualize magnetically.