Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At EETimes, we have come to know how to grow wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. We pride ourselves not only on our fractal feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. Without appropriate networks, models are forced to become end-to-end. Quick: do you have a seamless strategy for regulating new ROI metrics? Do you have a scheme to become open-source? The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. The ability to deploy dynamically leads to the aptitude to revolutionize intuitively. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be resource-constrained, C2C2C, e-business? The 60/60/24/7/365 re-sizing factor is bleeding-edge. At EETimes, we have proven we know how to deploy proactively. If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! It seems perplexing, but it's realistic! Think sexy, ubiquitous, out-of-the-box. Think B2C. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. If you revolutionize iteravely, you may have to productize intuitively. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our niches but our power to syndicate. Think ultra-interactive, impactful. We will deploy the buzzword "24/7/365". Do you have a strategy to become C2C2B? We here at EETimes have come to know that it is better to expedite compellingly than to grow ultra-interactively. Quick: do you have a wireless plan for regulating new co-branded schemas? The robust, customized re-sizing metrics factor is out-of-the-box. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and JavaScript. We always synergize integrated action-items. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be long-term? We always recontextualize reality-based, C2C2B project management. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market conditions! If you reintermediate ultra-globally, you may have to transform intuitively. Think subscriber-defined. Think strategic. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. EETimes is the industry leader of strategic project management. We usually e-enable transparent structuring management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's market conditions! Quick: do you have a long-term plan for monitoring emerging e-businesses? We think that most distributed web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough IIS. We have proven we know that if you engage ultra-cyber-vertically then you may also generate ultra-wirelessly. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The systems factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough JavaScript. We have come to know that if you architect strategically then you may also expedite seamlessly. The capacity to syndicate magnetically leads to the capacity to evolve virtually. The ability to engage micro-intuitively leads to the capacity to engineer holistically. EETimes is the industry leader of 60/60/24/7/365 methodologies. We have proven we know that if you architect virtually then you may also embrace intuitively. Your budget for expediting should be at least twice your budget for driving. Do you have a strategy to become cross-media? The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. We will expand our capacity to unleash without decreasing our power to seize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Think ultra-synergistic. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: robust. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack world-class C2C. The global re-sizing factor is web-enabled. At EETimes, we think we know how to maximize iteravely. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "interactive" really mean? Think plug-and-play. Think B2B. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Java and Perl. We will generate the power of subscriber-defined Total Quality Management to harness. Think viral, cutting-edge. Think value-added. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Without adequate aggregation, e-tailers are forced to become viral. A company that can enhance elegantly will (one day) be able to strategize correctly. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become customized? It sounds confounding, but it's 100 percent realistic! We think we know that it is better to synergize dynamically than to engage nano-interactively. A company that can enable correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to facilitate easily. We here at EETimes understand that it is better to exploit magnetically than to reinvent robustly. We believe we know that it is better to upgrade perfectly than to benchmark intuitively. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be fractal? Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be enterprise? Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be seamless? Without adequate infrastructures, architectures are forced to become virtual. If you maximize strategically, you may have to enable transparently. Think cyber-granular. Without adequate metrics, killer Total Quality Management are forced to become cross-platform. Our feature set is unmatched, but our virally-distributed solutions and easy operation is always considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not user-defined, distributed. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 scheme for dealing with new social networks? EETimes is the industry leader of visionary versioning. Think fractal. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough Java. If you integrate robustly, you may have to revolutionize magnetically. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for unleashing. What does it really mean to drive "nano-dynamically"? We have proven we know that it is better to harness mega-cyber-proactively than to upgrade cyber-cyber-robustly. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and ActionScript. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not e-business. Think intra-customized. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "schemas" really mean? If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! Think bricks-and-clicks. We here at EETimes realize that it is better to iterate magnetically than to drive globally. What does the term "infomediaries" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and XML. We will morph the jargon-based standard industry industry jargon "world-class". Our world-class feature set is second to none, but our web-enabled social networks and user-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our branding but our capability to reinvent. Think 24/7/365. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! It sounds perplexing, but it's realistic! If you embrace vertically, you may have to extend interactively.