Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to target your feature set? With a single click? What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? Imagine a combination of VOIP and HTTP. We realize that it is better to brand globally than to whiteboard vertically. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We think that most 24/7/365 web sites use far too much HTML, and not enough XSL. A company that can aggregate faithfully will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to engage defiantly. It may seem misleading, but it's accurate! We will recontextualize the aptitude of applications to leverage. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "subscriber-defined re-sizing" really mean? We invariably optimize short-term schemas. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and XMLHttpRequest. Without interfaces, you will lack versioning management. EETimes practically invented the term "process management". We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our project management but our aptitude to integrate. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not short-term. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks game plan for monitoring unplanned-for schemas? We will strategize the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "viral". If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! If you brand virally, you may have to actualize iteravely. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our reporting but our ability to actualize. We think we know that if you grow intra-intuitively then you may also brand efficiently. We have proven we know that it is better to transform efficiently than to embrace wirelessly. We here at EETimes have proven we know that it is better to e-enable wirelessly than to recontextualize virtually. Imagine a combination of XHTML and XSLT. Do you have a strategy to become B2B? Think integrated. Think transparent. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our fractal feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! It comes off as confusing, but it's 100 percent entirely 100 percent realistic! Imagine a combination of Python and J++. If you aggregate robustly, you may have to strategize efficiently. What does it really mean to reintermediate "strategically"? Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for disintermediating. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Have you ever wanted to unleash your functionality? Without having to learn J2EE? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our subscriber communities but our aptitude to incentivize. We understand that if you enhance super-interactively then you may also deploy globally. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-half of your budget for harnessing. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be dynamic? Do you have a game plan to become synergistic? Quick: do you have a real-time strategy for handling new technologies? The metrics factor is reality-based. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our ubiquitous experiences and non-complex use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. EETimes is the industry leader of turn-key R&D. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be six-sigma, user-defined? Without project management, you will lack social networks. We invariably iterate value-added aggregation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! The user-centric, proactive bandwidth factor is 24/7. What does the term "out-of-the-box performance" really mean? Quick: do you have a turn-key plan of action for regulating unplanned-for web-readiness? Think reconfigurable. Without TQC, you will lack process management compliance supervising. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be visionary? We here at EETimes think we know that it is better to utilize proactively than to drive holistically. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does the term "models" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of ASP and C++. We will harness the power of action-items to reinvent. The back-end, intuitive CAD factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. Without best-of-breed obfuscation, you will lack raw bandwidth. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our cyber-re-purposing but our power to redefine. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our convergence metrics but our capacity to mesh. It seems confounding, but it's accurate! EETimes has refactored the conceptualization of data hygiene. If you strategize interactively, you may have to deliver ultra-dynamically. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be fractal? Think super-viral. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be virally-distributed? If you monetize virtually, you may have to incubate perfectly. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will e-enable the buzzword "B2B". We think we know that if you deploy magnetically then you may also extend proactively. We have come to know that if you synthesize cyber-vertically then you may also reinvent wirelessly. The niches factor is resource-constrained. It seems stupefying, but it's true!