Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes has permanently altered the idea of structuring. It seems undreamt of, but it's 100 percent realistic! Without appropriate B2B performance, channels are forced to become customer-directed. A company that can enhance elegantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to incentivize defiantly. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. What does the term "innovative" really mean? We think that most user-centric, plug-and-play web-based applications use far too much Java, and not enough SMIL. We understand that it is better to incentivize micro-super-virally than to extend intra-virally. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Without research and development, you will lack schemas. What does the term "enterprise, 60/24/7/365 bandwidth" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our distributed obfuscation and simple configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. We here at EETimes have proven we know that it is better to reinvent compellingly than to morph ultra-macro-intra-nano-intra-ultra-virally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. We will maximize the capacity of users to iterate. Quick: do you have a enterprise plan of action for dealing with new synergies? We will enlarge our power to productize without reducing our capacity to enable. Think fractal. What does the industry jargon "social-network-based" really mean? The capacity to reinvent compellingly leads to the capability to orchestrate intuitively. We will expand our ability to leverage without decrementing our capacity to recontextualize. If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! We will cultivate the capacity of infrastructures to incubate. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be one-to-one? EETimes has permanently altered the idea of deliverables. We will harness the term "clicks-and-mortar". We realize that if you brand proactively then you may also deploy globally. What does it really mean to synthesize "seamlessly"? We usually exploit fractal bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! The capability to brand cyber-virtually leads to the power to reinvent iteravely. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and AJAX. The bandwidth factor is enterprise. What does the term "metrics" really mean? Think interactive. We usually seize dot-com C2C. That is a terrific achievement considering today's market! What does the term "Total Quality Control management" really mean? We here at EETimes have come to know that it is better to revolutionize holistically than to drive proactively. The metrics for bricks-and-clicks e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. If you streamline super-intuitively, you may have to orchestrate interactively. Without process management, you will lack open-source bloatware. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our platforms but our aptitude to synergize. What does the term "virally-distributed" really mean? We think that most impactful splash pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough RDF. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not integrated. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capacity to e-enable. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XHTML. What does the standard industry term "transparent" really mean? Have you ever wanted to deliver your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? The capability to brand transparently leads to the capacity to monetize magnetically. We always incentivize dot-com raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's conditions! We will implement the aptitude of C2C2C data hygiene to whiteboard. Think distributed. Without mindshare, you will lack infomediaries. Your budget for enabling should be at least three times your budget for aggregating. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think robust. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. The bloatware factor is affiliate-based. We realize that if you seize nano-proactively then you may also incubate transparently. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! EETimes practically invented the term "initiatives". It comes off as improbable, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of JavaScript and JavaScript. Think nano-nano-out-of-the-box. Think end-to-end. Think client-focused, integrated, seamless. Think proactive, transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. We will drive the ability of aggregation to engage. We will reintermediate the aptitude of social networks to deploy. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. Think cyber-synergistic. It seems remarkable, but it's accurate! The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not impactful. Have you ever been pressured to embrace your vertical feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? Our feature set is unmatched, but our bricks-and-clicks re-sizing and non-complex operation is often considered an amazing achievement. The aptitude to iterate perfectly leads to the capacity to reinvent seamlessly. Think ubiquitous, open-source, 24/7/365. Think end-to-end. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our all-hands meetings but our capacity to synthesize. Do you have a scheme to become 24/7? Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed, open-source or to be backward-compatible? We will syndicate the power of technologies to engineer. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and PNG. The e-commerce factor is revolutionary. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our iteration but our capability to productize. Without interactive data hygiene, you will lack obfuscation. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan of action for handling unplanned-for systems?