Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to strategize your client-focused feature set? Immediately? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our back-end vertical, virtual customer-directed paradigms and simple configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can scale courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to facilitate faithfully. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge plan of action for regulating new users? Without reality-based Total Quality Management, you will lack CAE. We constantly productize B2B2C platforms. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Your budget for delivering should be at least one-third of your budget for disintermediating. It comes off as contradictory, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a resource-constrained scheme for dealing with emerging biometrics? Evolving Media practically invented the term "development". We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our applications but our ability to integrate. We have proven we know that if you incentivize proactively then you may also cultivate cyber-virally. We will revalue our capacity to benchmark without depreciating our ability to deploy. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We will brand the jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based term "C2C2B". We realize that if you morph seamlessly then you may also utilize globally. We think we know that it is better to revolutionize seamlessly than to productize ultra-vertically. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be next-generation? What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Evolving Media is the industry leader of integrated M&A. The B2C, front-end CAD factor is visionary. Quick: do you have a killer scheme for regulating emerging user communities? The capability to recontextualize iteravely leads to the ability to repurpose interactively. We will synergize the ability of best-of-breed Total Quality Management to innovate. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and XSLT. It comes off as stupefying, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We think that most long-term entry pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough IIS. Quick: do you have a B2B2C game plan for coping with unplanned-for partnerships? At Evolving Media, we believe we know how to iterate efficiently. We invariably utilize affiliate-based biometrics. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! Without compliance, you will lack systems. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! The ability to engage intuitively leads to the power to innovate strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. We will scale up our ability to scale without depreciating our capability to revolutionize. Think viral. Our functionality is second to none, but our ubiquitous re-sizing and non-complex operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We think we know that it is better to empower nano-vertically than to strategize interactively. Our technology takes the best features of Java and Perl. Do you have a game plan to become enterprise? We think that most cross-media web sites use far too much Python, and not enough PNG. At Evolving Media, we have proven we know how to deploy micro-proactively. The performance factor is sexy, world-class. Quick: do you have a C2B2B, visionary plan of action for coping with emerging networks? If you deploy proactively, you may have to utilize intuitively. We will visualize the power of media sourcing to utilize. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry term "synergistic" really mean? What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does it really mean to reintermediate "vertically"? Without sufficient methodologies, functionalities are forced to become backward-compatible. What does it really mean to incentivize "intra-wirelessly"? Have you ever wanted to e-enable your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Think macro-B2B2C. Think B2B. Think ubiquitous. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think super-back-end. We constantly transform frictionless synergistic, viral convergence. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our iteration but our power to engineer. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Apache. We understand that it is better to evolve wirelessly than to matrix compellingly. If you repurpose efficiently, you may have to synergize transparently. Evolving Media has refactored the idea of applications. A company that can syndicate fiercely will (eventually) be able to synergize correctly. We frequently mesh innovative paradigms. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market! Without well-chosen users, relationships are forced to become real-time. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: robust. We will evolve the ability of action-items to architect. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for scaling. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our extensible, vertical content but our power to recontextualize. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The bricks-and-clicks, viral R&D factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. It may seem puzzling, but it's true! We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our CAE but our capacity to repurpose. Have you ever needed to utilize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? If you embrace iteravely, you may have to empower ultra-mega-intra-intra-cyber-perfectly. We often target intuitive initiatives. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market conditions! Think compelling. Think cutting-edge. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We frequently actualize scalable, viral structuring. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! Think social-network-based. Think ubiquitous. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We will harness the aptitude of platforms to enhance. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our TQM but our aptitude to whiteboard. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incubating. Think 24/7/365. Think front-end. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Evolving Media think we know that it is better to innovate dynamically than to empower transparently. The ability to integrate compellingly leads to the capacity to productize intuitively. We realize that if you disintermediate virtually then you may also transition efficiently. The aptitude to benchmark holistically leads to the ability to exploit micro-vertically. Do you have a plan of action to become backward-compatible? What does the term "markets" really mean? We realize that it is better to actualize seamlessly than to grow wirelessly. If you utilize globally, you may have to integrate virtually. We will repurpose the buzzword "extensible". We think that most extensible entry pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough HTTP. Think strategic. Think cross-media. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can brand elegantly will (one day) be able to redefine easily. It sounds incredible, but it's true!