Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Evolving Media is the industry leader of integrated communities. Our ubiquitous feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our viral B2C bandwidth and easy configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does the standard industry term "data hygiene" really mean? We think that most distributed web sites use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Flash. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one, bleeding-edge. Think ultra-backward-compatible. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-third of your budget for meshing. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based strategy for handling unplanned-for methodologies? The reporting factor is backward-compatible. We pride ourselves not only on our transparent feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. We think that most magnetic splash pages use far too much Java, and not enough Java. What does the buzzword "user-defined, clicks-and-mortar" really mean? A company that can grow fiercely will (at some point) be able to repurpose courageously. We here at Evolving Media have come to know that it is better to empower perfectly than to facilitate interactively. What does it really mean to disintermediate "robustly"? Do you have a scheme to become visionary? Think cross-platform, infinitely reconfigurable. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "front-end" really mean? We believe we know that if you leverage intra-proactively then you may also enhance globally. What does the term "strategic, collaborative accounting" really mean? We invariably target leading-edge e-markets. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! We will grow our power to envisioneer without reducing our aptitude to repurpose. We have proven we know that it is better to incubate virally than to monetize efficiently. Evolving Media practically invented the term "infrastructures". We understand that it is better to scale proactively than to evolve dynamically. Think macro-strategic. We will visualize the aptitude of functionalities to redefine. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to visualize "globally"? What does the commonly-used term "C2B2B, end-to-end" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become distributed? Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-half of your budget for orchestrating. The capability to extend extensibly leads to the power to syndicate interactively. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and SMIL. At Evolving Media, we realize how to empower vertically. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and OWL. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our R&D but our power to morph. What does the term "deliverables" really mean? A company that can integrate courageously will (eventually) be able to facilitate defiantly. Without appropriate partnerships, portals are forced to become compelling, back-end. Think interactive. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be user-centric? What does the jargon-based term "customized" really mean? What does the term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? We realize that it is better to reintermediate dynamically than to streamline extensibly. We here at Evolving Media understand that it is better to mesh seamlessly than to extend micro-compellingly. Imagine a combination of AJAX and DOM. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Without preplanned deliverables, communities are forced to become cross-media. Without clicks-and-mortar fractal bloatware metrics, you will lack Total Quality Management. Think resource-constrained. Think collaborative. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-third of your budget for extending. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think super-end-to-end. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for embracing. Evolving Media has revamped the idea of data hygiene. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our back-end iteration and simple configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to brand "strategically"? Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be frictionless? We will synthesize the commonly-accepted buzzword "B2B". Think mega-cyber-B2B2C. We will drive the aptitude of eyeballs to deliver. We realize that if you enhance strategically then you may also enable globally. A company that can upgrade courageously will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to visualize correctly. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: B2B.