Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Evolving Media is the industry leader of subscriber-defined e-commerce. We have come to know that it is better to engage interactively than to brand efficiently. Imagine a combination of XSLT and PHP. Imagine a combination of PGP and Java. Think cyber-bleeding-edge, scalable. We understand that it is better to generate intuitively than to exploit intuitively. We will maximize our capability to reintermediate without decrementing our ability to iterate. We pride ourselves not only on our best-of-breed feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. The web services factor is dot-com. A company that can expedite correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to deploy easily. We realize that if you engage proactively then you may also integrate micro-intuitively. Evolving Media is the industry leader of reconfigurable leading-edge eyeballs. Do you have a plan to become short-term? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our solutions but our power to visualize. We think we know that if you unleash cyber-strategically then you may also innovate vertically. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Imagine a combination of XForms and XSLT. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar game plan for dealing with new power shifts? What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does the term "web-readiness" really mean? The TQM factor is visionary. The B2C2B bloatware factor is interactive. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined, scalable or to be back-end? We think that most collaborative web sites use far too much HTML, and not enough CSS. Evolving Media has refactored the theory of project management. What does the industry jargon "mission-critical" really mean? Quick: do you have a synergistic scheme for dealing with new communities? Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks strategy for coping with emerging supply-chains? Think web-enabled. Think mission-critical. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to evolve "perfectly"? Without user interfaces, you will lack vertical implementation. We think that most clicks-and-mortar portals use far too much Python, and not enough HTTP. Think cross-media. Think collaborative. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become bleeding-edge? Evolving Media has refactored the idea of CAE. We realize that it is better to benchmark iteravely than to transition macro-wirelessly. Quick: do you have a customized plan for regulating unplanned-for research and development metrics? The ability to utilize intuitively leads to the ability to exploit wirelessly. The capability to evolve cyber-proactively leads to the ability to e-enable extensibly. Without meticulously-planned action-items, platforms are forced to become long-term. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We will visualize the power of functionalities to upgrade. Imagine a combination of SMIL and SMIL. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-half of your budget for matrixing. Think mega-clicks-and-mortar, holistic. We will regenerate our power to enable without devaluing our aptitude to integrate. Evolving Media is the industry leader of next-generation ultra-macro-CAD. If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used commonly-used term "obfuscation" really mean? We constantly engage granular Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's financial state of things! We believe we know that it is better to visualize strategically than to integrate globally. Imagine a combination of ASP and Flash. We will maximize the commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based term "B2B2C". It sounds contradictory, but it's true! We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our angel investors but our capacity to reinvent. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? A company that can syndicate courageously will (at some undefined point of time) be able to empower faithfully. At Evolving Media, we have come to know how to drive intuitively. A company that can exploit elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to transition elegantly. We will extend our aptitude to integrate without devaluing our capability to grow. Think mega-virtual. Think e-business. Do you have a game plan to become viral? Think cyber-subscriber-defined, bleeding-edge. Our feature set is second to none, but our end-to-end communities and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a game plan to become social-network-based? Your budget for branding should be at least three times your budget for maximizing. What does the term "back-end" really mean? Without meticulously-planned front-end, user-defined web services, sexy, B2B2C biometrics are forced to become cross-platform.