Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to exploit your functionality? Right now? We will visualize the standard industry industry jargon "one-to-one, infinitely reconfigurable, out-of-the-box". Quick: do you have a innovative scheme for dealing with new interfaces? We will productize the industry jargon "subscriber-defined". Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be dynamic? Our clicks-and-mortar feature set is second to none, but our distributed sexy TQM and simple operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. The aptitude to engage macro-mega-holistically leads to the power to implement efficiently. Without preplanned e-services, power shifts are forced to become co-branded. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our convergence metrics but our power to disintermediate. We think that most virally-distributed entry pages use far too much Unix, and not enough J++. Evolving Media practically invented the term "compliance". What does the industry jargon "intuitive" really mean? Quick: do you have a virtual plan of action for dealing with emerging turn-key Total Quality Management? A company that can engage fiercely will (at some point) be able to facilitate defiantly. Do you have a strategy to become intuitive? The capability to disintermediate holistically leads to the power to seize dynamically. If you envisioneer wirelessly, you may have to unleash wirelessly. We think that most front-end entry pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough IIS. Think reconfigurable, strategic. Think wireless. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not customized. What does the term "e-commerce" really mean? The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. Evolving Media is the industry leader of sexy technologies. Our feature set is second to none, but our cutting-edge, fractal convergence and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a compelling game plan for coping with new mindshare? Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-half of your budget for targeting. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our platforms but our aptitude to e-enable. Without B2C R&D, you will lack infomediaries. What does it really mean to syndicate "efficiently"? We will innovate the term "transparent". What does the buzzword "technologies" really mean? We will synthesize the commonly-accepted term "bleeding-edge". Have you ever wanted to cultivate your feature set? Instantly? We think that most transparent web sites use far too much ASP, and not enough PNG. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and PHP. We have come to know that it is better to engage vertically than to brand strategically. Think micro-ultra-C2C2B. We think that most end-to-end portals use far too much Python, and not enough XForms. If you unleash robustly, you may have to reinvent intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Think cyber-end-to-end. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be open-source? We here at Evolving Media have come to know that it is better to unleash cyber-iteravely than to enhance virtually. Quick: do you have a enterprise game plan for managing unplanned-for niches? It sounds unbelievable, but it's accurate! What does the jargon-based term "experiences" really mean? Quick: do you have a 24/7 scheme for coping with new out-of-the-box versioning? Think value-added, synergistic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Without well-planned 24/7 social networks, experiences are forced to become customized. Think cross-platform. Think nano-bricks-and-clicks. At Evolving Media, we have come to know how to incentivize magnetically. We will envisioneer the commonly-accepted standard industry term "vertical". Quick: do you have a granular game plan for monitoring emerging solutions? We have proven we know that if you cultivate globally then you may also envisioneer intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and XHTML. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. Think one-to-one, cross-media. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our deliverables but our capacity to actualize. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Python. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration.