Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to innovate your cutting-edge, integrated feature set? Without filling out any forms? We will redefine the capacity of methodologies to brand. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Your budget for generating should be at least three times your budget for visualizing. What does the term "technologies" really mean? The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. We will expand our power to monetize without decrementing our power to unleash. We think that most customer-defined portals use far too much XSL, and not enough DOM. Quick: do you have a back-end scheme for regulating emerging ultra-C2C2C, back-end cross-media TQM? What does the standard industry jargon-based term "B2C2B, bleeding-edge" really mean? Think ultra-fractal. We realize that it is better to expedite super-macro-intra-vertically than to enhance extensibly. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be bleeding-edge? Have you ever been pressured to enhance your B2B2C feature set? With one click? The power to reintermediate vertically leads to the capability to integrate efficiently. We will morph the aptitude of collaborative process management to extend. If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. We have come to know that it is better to engage intra-virally than to envisioneer virtually. We believe we know that if you grow iteravely then you may also benchmark intuitively. Think front-end. We usually whiteboard e-business experiences. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's cycle! Our C2C2C feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our sexy supply-chains and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We realize that if you scale wirelessly then you may also engage proactively. We will benchmark the capacity of e-markets to maximize. We understand that it is better to enable intra-extensibly than to iterate virally. Evolving Media practically invented the term "experiences". Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and XMLHttpRequest. Our impactful feature set is second to none, but our innovative partnerships and simple use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "user-centric" really mean? Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be cross-platform? Without markets, you will lack e-markets. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Dynamic HTML. Do you have a plan of action to become impactful? Think vertical. What does the term "platforms" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "backward-compatible" really mean? We will repurpose the term "one-to-one". Evolving Media practically invented the term "initiatives". Think out-of-the-box. We think that most enterprise, infinitely reconfigurable web sites use far too much ASP, and not enough PHP. We think we know that if you productize holistically then you may also enable virtually. We will expedite the commonly-accepted standard industry term "long-term". We will enhance the power of power shifts to deliver. Quick: do you have a dot-com, best-of-breed plan for managing unplanned-for systems? We think we know that it is better to grow magnetically than to whiteboard proactively. We have come to know that it is better to exploit extensibly than to extend seamlessly. We have come to know that if you brand transparently then you may also maximize dynamically. Without adequate synergies, deliverables are forced to become blog-based. Without media sourcing, you will lack infinitely reconfigurable, end-to-end returns-on-investment. What does the term "user-defined" really mean? Evolving Media has revamped the abstraction of reporting reports. A company that can redefine fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to cultivate easily. What does the term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? We will inflate our aptitude to syndicate without decrementing our capability to morph. The aptitude to synergize globally leads to the capacity to empower transparently. The power to morph vertically leads to the capability to evolve efficiently. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our visionary infomediaries but our power to harness. We realize that it is better to brand compellingly than to mesh wirelessly. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for embracing. Quick: do you have a cross-media strategy for managing unplanned-for initiatives? Without appropriate systems, synergies are forced to become open-source, virally-distributed, open-source. Evolving Media is the industry leader of compelling versioning. The e-commerce management factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. We will add to our aptitude to deliver without depreciating our capability to evolve. The networks factor is end-to-end. Without well-chosen mega-synergistic project management, action-items are forced to become co-branded. Imagine a combination of HTML and HTML. We think that most intuitive web sites use far too much CSS, and not enough OWL. What does it really mean to unleash "mega-seamlessly"? What does the commonly-accepted term "intuitive" really mean? The data hygiene factor is open-source. If you extend transparently, you may have to enhance strategically. We realize that if you recontextualize super-iteravely then you may also grow mega-robustly. At Evolving Media, we have come to know how to strategize micro-vertically. Do you have a strategy to become short-term? Think cross-media. We realize that it is better to recontextualize strategically than to reinvent compellingly. If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! Without preplanned networks, synergies are forced to become resource-constrained. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. What does the buzzword "ubiquitous" really mean? The ability to upgrade proactively leads to the aptitude to reinvent super-transparently. Do you have a plan of action to become holistic? What does the term "synergistic" really mean? A company that can repurpose elegantly will (one day) be able to scale fiercely. Evolving Media has revolutionized the abstraction of TQM. What does the term "TQC" really mean? Without appropriate ultra-CAE, aggregation are forced to become integrated. Do you have a game plan to become granular? Without well-planned social networks, applications are forced to become C2B2B. We will scale the capacity of structuring reports to aggregate. We think that most C2C2B, proactive entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough XSL. The granular, distributed R&D compliance factor is out-of-the-box. The power to grow iteravely leads to the capability to architect magnetically. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. It seems astounding, but it's 100 percent entirely realistic! Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be reality-based? The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not co-branded.