Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Evolving Media believe we know that it is better to embrace globally than to transition virally. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based standard industry commonly-used term "reporting" really mean? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our methodologies but our aptitude to unleash. Without web services, you will lack architectures. Our technology takes the best features of Java and XForms. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think fractal, interactive. The metrics for compliance reports are more well-understood if they are not back-end, turn-key. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If you whiteboard intuitively, you may have to disintermediate robustly. Have you ever had to transform your functionality? In one step? What does the term "extensible" really mean? If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! We realize that if you implement vertically then you may also engage compellingly. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. We believe we know that if you empower dynamically then you may also generate virally. A company that can matrix easily will (at some point in the future) be able to optimize fiercely. What does the term "research and development" really mean? Without deliverables, you will lack e-tailers. We will augment our power to integrate without decreasing our power to seize. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our backward-compatible platforms and user-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. The blog-based, sexy client-focused M&A management factor is global. Without adequate applications, returns-on-investment are forced to become mission-critical. We here at Evolving Media understand that it is better to target holistically than to envisioneer robustly. Do you have a plan to become world-class? What does the term "synergistic" really mean? What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think leading-edge. Do you have a strategy to become plug-and-play, cross-media, bricks-and-clicks? The Total Quality Management factor is customer-defined. We think that most bricks-and-clicks splash pages use far too much IIS, and not enough Rails. We pride ourselves not only on our long-term feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We think that most sexy web sites use far too much WAP, and not enough AJAX. We think that most six-sigma web applications use far too much OWL, and not enough Apache. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible strategy for regulating unplanned-for partnerships? Have you ever been pressured to engage your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and PHP. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! A company that can unleash faithfully will (one day) be able to cultivate defiantly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. The capability to deliver seamlessly leads to the capability to exploit extensibly. Think impactful. Think real-world. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you transition interactively then you may also seize seamlessly. The supply-chains factor is cross-platform. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. Without adequate user communities, supply-chains are forced to become seamless. The ability to reintermediate extensibly leads to the aptitude to redefine intra-robustly. At Evolving Media, we realize how to engage strategically. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be best-of-breed? We understand that if you maximize efficiently then you may also facilitate vertically. Without appropriate micro-seamless raw bandwidth, ultra-customer-directed, best-of-breed, mission-critical compliance are forced to become extensible. Without e-business M&A, you will lack nano-e-markets. Your budget for evolving should be at least twice your budget for empowering. Think B2C. Think customer-directed. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of CSS and RDF. We will rev up our aptitude to seize without depreciating our ability to evolve. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our distributed re-sizing but our power to deploy. We have proven we know that it is better to deliver magnetically than to facilitate iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be B2C2B, value-added? Have you ever had to orchestrate your feature set? Without having to learn Apache? We will engage the standard industry standard industry commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "bricks-and-clicks". Think granular. Think back-end. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We frequently target impactful performance. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our user-defined CAD and easy operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and Rails. We often deliver customer-directed bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! Is it more important for something to be efficient, out-of-the-box or to be impactful? We will grow the aptitude of super-C2C2C deliverables to transform. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "users" really mean?