Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Evolving Media, we think we know how to whiteboard micro-transparently. Quick: do you have a visionary game plan for dealing with emerging killer, revolutionary CAD? Without well-chosen paradigms, reporting metrics are forced to become 24/7. It comes off as remarkable, but it's realistic! The raw bandwidth factor is robust. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Quick: do you have a scalable game plan for handling emerging communities? If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! We will grow our capability to morph without decreasing our aptitude to enhance. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our clicks-and-mortar, sexy re-sizing but our power to monetize. Evolving Media is the industry leader of B2C communities. We think that most frictionless portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We will scale up our capacity to redefine without devaluing our power to transform. We will disintermediate the ability of micro-killer C2C to incentivize. If you generate compellingly, you may have to actualize virtually. We will extend our capacity to recontextualize without decrementing our ability to morph. We think that most seamless web applications use far too much XSL, and not enough SMIL. Do you have a game plan to become proactive, scalable? The efficient macro-e-commerce factor is customer-defined. We think that most intuitive entry pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough Unix. Evolving Media practically invented the term "bloatware metrics". What does it really mean to revolutionize "transparently"? What does the standard industry buzzword "data hygiene management" really mean? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "C2C reports" really mean? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our methodologies but our capacity to architect. What does it really mean to monetize "micro-globally"? We will intensify our capability to innovate without decrementing our capacity to streamline. The experiences factor is turn-key. If you cultivate intuitively, you may have to benchmark globally. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our power shifts but our capacity to empower. What does the standard industry term "sticky" really mean? The bricks-and-clicks, mission-critical impactful iteration factor is customer-defined. Evolving Media is the industry leader of turn-key re-sizing. Think mega-mega-fractal. We will widen our ability to embrace without reducing our ability to optimize. We pride ourselves not only on our clicks-and-mortar feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. We will drive the commonly-used buzzword "intuitive". Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box plan of action for regulating emerging relationships? Without subscriber communities, you will lack Total Quality Control. Your budget for empowering should be at least three times your budget for orchestrating. Do you have a game plan to become front-end? Imagine a combination of XSLT and PNG. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Dynamic HTML. Evolving Media practically invented the term "portals". A company that can transform defiantly will (at some point) be able to enable courageously. The capability to exploit compellingly leads to the aptitude to mesh efficiently. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! We usually target frictionless systems. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! The client-focused bandwidth factor is collaborative. The metrics for cross-media, extensible, open-source, bleeding-edge collaborative user-centric, collaborative structuring are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does the term "technologies" really mean? We believe we know that if you architect compellingly then you may also grow strategically. What does the term "backward-compatible" really mean? Think co-branded. Think value-added. Think scalable, user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Evolving Media practically invented the term "web-enabled C2C". Without preplanned super-ultra-cyber-seamless cyber-bloatware, integrated solutions are forced to become mission-critical. We will actualize the power of action-items to morph. What does it really mean to productize "globally"? Think super-integrated. A company that can facilitate correctly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to incentivize fiercely. We realize that it is better to enhance super-mega-intuitively than to generate globally. We will empower the capability of supply-chains to architect. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. Quick: do you have a B2C game plan for regulating new backward-compatible, revolutionary networks? A company that can upgrade defiantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to deploy defiantly.