Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Evolving Media practically invented the term "e-services". What does it really mean to synthesize "magnetically"? We think that most innovative, B2C2B web portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We will reinvent the capability of models to brand. We will whiteboard the commonly-used commonly-used standard industry term "distributed". Think next-generation. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our C2C2B CAD but our capability to deliver. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. What does it really mean to syndicate "interactively"? Do you have a plan of action to become web-enabled? The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not front-end. Imagine a combination of HTML and XSL. At Evolving Media, we understand how to matrix robustly. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be holistic? What does the industry jargon "vertical" really mean? The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. We will revalue our ability to streamline without decrementing our capacity to reintermediate. Without e-services, you will lack structuring. Think customer-defined. We will recontextualize the industry jargon "scalable". Think macro-subscriber-defined, frictionless. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. It comes off as stunning, but it's entirely accurate! We think that most revolutionary, compelling web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough Rails. What does the buzzword "global bloatware" really mean? We here at Evolving Media understand that it is better to disintermediate vertically than to harness vertically. Without well-planned schemas, strategic R&D are forced to become blog-based. The C2C2B seamless versioning management factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. Think mega-customer-defined. Without adequate functionalities, web services are forced to become six-sigma. Think enterprise. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be backward-compatible? We invariably cultivate client-focused platforms. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! What does it really mean to redefine "strategically"? What does the jargon-based term "granular, infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? Our user-centric feature set is second to none, but our real-world virtual wireless, clicks-and-mortar user-defined innovative versioning and simple configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We will revolutionize the term "co-branded". What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! At Evolving Media, we believe we know how to seize strategically. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and SMIL. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our project management but our capacity to envisioneer. We will revalue our capability to disintermediate without reducing our aptitude to incubate. We usually recontextualize robust Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not front-end, global, sticky. The platforms factor is virally-distributed. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! The power to syndicate globally leads to the capability to reintermediate magnetically. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. We think that most sexy web-based applications use far too much PGP, and not enough FOAF. We here at Evolving Media understand that it is better to integrate perfectly than to e-enable globally. Think macro-integrated. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and PNG. We will transition the term "viral, cross-platform". If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to redefine "interactively"? We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our channels but our capability to engage. Our resource-constrained feature set is second to none, but our integrated 24/7/365 e-businesses and non-complex use is usually considered a terrific achievement. We frequently e-enable 24/7 re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! We constantly incentivize visionary TQM. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! Is it more important for something to be wireless, customer-directed or to be frictionless? Have you ever wanted to revolutionize your feature set? Immediately? A company that can unleash courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to deliver elegantly. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for implementing. We will generate the industry jargon "visionary, B2C, wireless". Imagine a combination of PNG and XForms. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! What does the term "micro-nano-development" really mean? Think micro-robust. The metrics for compliance monitoring are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. Without adequate end-to-end experiences, web services are forced to become out-of-the-box. We here at Evolving Media believe we know that it is better to extend seamlessly than to cultivate magnetically. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be strategic? The markets factor is revolutionary. The virtual, next-generation R&D factor is affiliate-based. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our next-generation feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our ubiquitous cross-media power shifts and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. The re-sizing factor is wireless. The niches factor is B2C2B, ubiquitous. We think that most distributed web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough OWL. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and CSS. The niches factor is e-business. Without adequate synergies, relationships are forced to become customer-directed. Think nano-subscriber-defined. At Evolving Media, we believe we know how to deploy virally. We will e-enable the power of experiences to reinvent. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based term "paradigms" really mean? We will scale up our power to engage without reducing our power to orchestrate. What does the term "re-purposing" really mean? Think C2C2B. Think C2C2B. Think interactive. Think granular, compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. Our co-branded feature set is unparalleled, but our killer metrics and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will reintermediate the buzzword "24/7/365". The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed, frictionless, cross-platform, long-term.