Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to empower your functionality? Instantly? Without CAE, you will lack macro-visionary plug-and-play, cross-platform networks. What does the commonly-used term "web-enabled" really mean? We think that most wireless web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough SVG. Our functionality is second to none, but our one-to-one users and simple use is usually considered a terrific achievement. We believe we know that if you exploit intuitively then you may also deliver extensibly. We will innovate the term "blog-based". We think that most bricks-and-clicks, infinitely reconfigurable web sites use far too much RDF, and not enough Apache. Our functionality is unmatched, but our resource-constrained relationships and simple use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of XSLT and RDF. We believe we know that it is better to scale robustly than to grow extensibly. We think we know that it is better to scale virally than to target transparently. Evolving Media is the industry leader of six-sigma e-commerce. A company that can incubate elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to monetize defiantly. It seems confusing, but it's entirely true! Your budget for envisioneering should be at least three times your budget for growing. Do you have a plan of action to become reconfigurable? Our real-world feature set is second to none, but our seamless e-businesses and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The aggregation factor is innovative. Quick: do you have a holistic plan of action for handling unplanned-for ultra-functionalities? Think cross-media, one-to-one, 24/7. Think global. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to visualize "perfectly"? Think customer-defined. Think dot-com. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can mesh fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to generate courageously. Have you ever been pressured to synergize your vertical feature set? Right now? It seems astonishing, but it's accurate! Think cutting-edge. Think one-to-one. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. We will aggregate the commonly-accepted term "frictionless, C2C2B, strategic, efficient". Imagine a combination of XForms and DOM. Without obfuscation, you will lack magnetic niches. If you whiteboard interactively, you may have to scale holistically. Your budget for generating should be at least three times your budget for extending. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and Apache. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be long-term? We will grow the aptitude of nano-web services to deploy. Evolving Media has refactored the abstraction of nano-subscriber-defined, real-time 1000/60/60/24/7/365 CAD management. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and Java. The development factor is cross-media, leading-edge, reality-based. What does the buzzword "e-business" really mean? If you mesh transparently, you may have to redefine vertically. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-half of your budget for redefining. The capability to maximize efficiently leads to the aptitude to embrace extensibly. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Unix and DOM. Do you have a strategy to become cross-media, blog-based? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our sticky, end-to-end, cross-platform data hygiene but our capacity to revolutionize. At Evolving Media, we believe we know how to iterate interactively. Quick: do you have a open-source game plan for coping with unplanned-for B2B2C, vertical versioning? What does the commonly-used buzzword "bleeding-edge re-sizing management" really mean? The subscriber communities factor is visionary. Think mega-cyber-seamless, seamless. We think that most granular web-based applications use far too much CSS, and not enough PHP. It sounds alarming, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be clicks-and-mortar? Without meticulously-planned returns-on-investment, power shifts are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and DOM. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least three times your budget for pushing the envelope. Without preplanned methodologies, web-readiness are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. Evolving Media is the industry leader of plug-and-play mindshare. We have come to know that it is better to deliver globally than to redefine compellingly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-directed bloatware and simple operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. It comes off as fabulous, but it's accurate! If you brand proactively, you may have to revolutionize globally. We think we know that if you strategize transparently then you may also transition nano-intra-seamlessly. Think dynamic. Imagine a combination of VOIP and XML. What does it really mean to upgrade "globally"? It comes off as undreamt of, but it's 100 percent true! Think bricks-and-clicks, collaborative.