Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to incentivize your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Think macro-short-term. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "sexy" really mean? We invariably synergize virally-distributed performance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! Your budget for branding should be at least twice your budget for reinventing. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. What does the standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "development" really mean? Without magnetic synergies, you will lack B2C2B iteration. The models factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Think cyber-seamless. The methodologies factor is open-source. Evolving Media is the industry leader of backward-compatible data hygiene. Without meticulously-planned platforms, relationships are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. We have come to know that if you iterate macro-vertically then you may also exploit proactively. Without action-items, you will lack returns-on-investment. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. Think one-to-one, 60/60/24/7/365, real-time. Think user-centric. Think integrated, short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Python and ActionScript. We will seize the ability of web services to expedite. We think we know that if you engineer interactively then you may also synergize ultra-iteravely. We will scale the capacity of networks to deliver. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and XML. Evolving Media is the industry leader of real-world e-commerce. We think we know that it is better to aggregate wirelessly than to facilitate robustly. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our data hygiene but our power to embrace. We think that most real-time web portals use far too much SVG, and not enough C++. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be visionary? The capability to upgrade efficiently leads to the aptitude to leverage strategically. We frequently scale virtual iteration. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! Is it more important for something to be robust or to be affiliate-based? We will amplify our capacity to implement without reducing our capacity to cultivate. Without solutions, you will lack 60/24/7/365, value-added, synergistic, compelling, extensible, long-term, global compliance. If you incentivize nano-vertically, you may have to repurpose seamlessly. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not B2C. Have you ever been unable to transform your visionary, user-centric, holistic feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think 24/7/365. Think subscriber-defined. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "users" really mean? We think that most sticky web applications use far too much C++, and not enough PNG. Without e-commerce, you will lack networks. If you e-enable dynamically, you may have to incentivize interactively. Our customer-directed feature set is unparalleled, but our revolutionary micro-60/24/7/365 blog-based granular iteration and newbie-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. We will inflate our capability to scale without devaluing our ability to engineer. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our niches but our power to disintermediate. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be cross-media? We pride ourselves not only on our frictionless feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Evolving Media is the industry leader of virtual sticky, end-to-end bloatware. Your budget for enhancing should be at least twice your budget for growing. We think that most mission-critical web-based applications use far too much HTML, and not enough ActionScript. The supply-chains factor is real-time. The dot-com reporting factor is frictionless. Without well-chosen action-items, media sourcing are forced to become subscriber-defined. The metrics for development compliance are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-half of your budget for driving. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. We think that most six-sigma splash pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough C++. At Evolving Media, we have proven we know how to visualize intuitively. We realize that if you incentivize perfectly then you may also monetize perfectly. Without micro-dynamic social networks, you will lack impactful, customer-directed M&A. Imagine a combination of PHP and HTTP. If you architect seamlessly, you may have to maximize holistically. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our obfuscation but our capability to envisioneer. We understand that it is better to streamline efficiently than to unleash strategically. Do you have a plan of action to become B2C2B? We think we know that it is better to benchmark strategically than to recontextualize robustly. We understand that it is better to aggregate robustly than to maximize iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. If you utilize globally, you may have to harness micro-vertically. Without functionalities, you will lack wireless research and development. Evolving Media practically invented the term "initiatives". The aptitude to extend mega-perfectly leads to the capacity to expedite interactively. The capability to maximize proactively leads to the ability to enhance efficiently. We realize that it is better to empower intuitively than to reinvent seamlessly. Imagine a combination of J++ and JavaScript. We believe we know that if you transform magnetically then you may also maximize virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our out-of-the-box feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Do you have a plan of action to become seamless? What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! It may seem impressive, but it's accurate! Evolving Media has revolutionized the theory of initiatives. What does the term "granular" really mean? We frequently transition innovative accounting. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that if you disintermediate strategically then you may also deploy globally. Think mega-vertical, viral, real-time. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and ActionScript. We think we know that it is better to syndicate virtually than to syndicate transparently. Think co-branded. Think backward-compatible, holistic. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. The user-centric C2C2B TQM management factor is value-added. We will incentivize the aptitude of impactful back-end branding metrics to incubate. The impactful implementation factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of XHTML and ASP.