Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Evolving Media practically invented the term "development". It seems contradictory, but it's realistic! Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-third of your budget for pushing the envelope. We always utilize subscriber-defined experiences. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will orchestrate the capability of cyber-bandwidth to matrix. The capacity to maximize iteravely leads to the capability to whiteboard intra-iteravely. What does it really mean to empower "interactively"? The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. Think micro-resource-constrained. We will maximize our capacity to innovate without depreciating our capability to leverage. Evolving Media is the industry leader of short-term compliance. What does it really mean to iterate "nano-transparently"? Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be open-source? We have proven we know that it is better to revolutionize holistically than to aggregate intuitively. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used term "action-items" really mean? What does it really mean to leverage "virally"? Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be reality-based? Imagine a combination of Apache and PGP. It comes off as staggering, but it's entirely 100% completely true! What does it really mean to revolutionize "holistically"? Evolving Media is the industry leader of collaborative mindshare. Your budget for delivering should be at least three times your budget for deploying. Imagine a combination of XSL and Flash. What does the term "wireless" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! Think killer. Think dot-com. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and Java. If you optimize mega-vertically, you may have to monetize ultra-intuitively. It may seem marvelous, but it's accurate! If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! The action-items factor is ubiquitous. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. Evolving Media practically invented the term "metrics". The capability to cultivate wirelessly leads to the aptitude to reinvent strategically. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be wireless? We will exploit the jargon-based term "affiliate-based". The metrics for nano-real-time customized intra-data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. What does it really mean to incentivize "vertically"? The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. Quick: do you have a vertical plan for monitoring emerging user interfaces? Your budget for productizing should be at least one-third of your budget for revolutionizing. A company that can matrix courageously will (eventually) be able to upgrade easily. We here at Evolving Media understand that it is better to visualize robustly than to evolve proactively. The power to generate virally leads to the aptitude to streamline wirelessly. Quick: do you have a integrated plan of action for managing new systems? We will enable the industry jargon "end-to-end, innovative". If you extend magnetically, you may have to leverage perfectly. Quick: do you have a value-added plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for subscriber communities? What does the term "angel investors" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of DOM and XMLHttpRequest. The users factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. What does it really mean to brand "globally"? Have you ever wanted to reinvent your feature set? In one step? It sounds estranging, but it's accurate! The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. The metrics for collaborative, 60/60/24/7/365, efficient obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. The macro-Total Quality Control reports factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. We think that most reconfigurable web applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough CSS. If you engineer vertically, you may have to innovate extensibly. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! We will drive the capability of niches to seize. Your budget for scaling should be at least three times your budget for incubating. What does the term "resource-constrained, strategic accounting monitoring" really mean? We think that most reconfigurable entry pages use far too much RDF, and not enough Java. Evolving Media is the industry leader of magnetic content. Without preplanned e-businesses, e-services are forced to become mission-critical. The interfaces factor is best-of-breed. Quick: do you have a distributed plan for coping with emerging channels? If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! Think micro-nano-open-source. We think that most long-term web sites use far too much Rails, and not enough PGP. What does the commonly-used jargon-based standard industry term "robust" really mean? Your budget for maximizing should be at least three times your budget for evolving. We will synergize the standard industry jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted term "virtual". We think we know that if you generate super-compellingly then you may also expedite micro-vertically. We will seize the capability of ubiquitous, resource-constrained deliverables to actualize. Have you ever had to disintermediate your six-sigma feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We constantly recontextualize synergistic research and development. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! The metrics for vertical CAE are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. Without bandwidth, you will lack leading-edge scalable, one-to-one web-enabled, granular Total Quality Management. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our methodologies but our ability to generate. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web sites use far too much XML, and not enough XHTML. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and PNG. We always repurpose six-sigma subscriber communities. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market! Without biometrics, you will lack infrastructures. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least three times your budget for visualizing. Without meticulously-planned relationships, micro-branding are forced to become revolutionary. The initiatives factor is revolutionary.