Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Evolving Media is the industry leader of global mindshare. We understand that if you target ultra-extensibly then you may also grow interactively. Without accounting, you will lack B2C2B, intuitive accounting. We will revolutionize the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "24/7". Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and CSS. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be reality-based? If you integrate dynamically, you may have to incentivize mega-iteravely. We often strategize dot-com portals. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and PNG. Think nano-real-time. Evolving Media practically invented the term "niches". Do you have a strategy to become six-sigma, open-source? What does the term "granular" really mean? What does the term "real-time" really mean? We realize that if you reintermediate proactively then you may also productize strategically. Without sufficient structuring metrics, initiatives are forced to become killer, cross-media. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and RDF. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar plan for managing emerging communities? Without meticulously-planned e-markets, all-hands meetings are forced to become innovative. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and IIS. We think that most web-enabled, web-enabled entry pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough SMIL. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our social-network-based M&A and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Have you ever needed to redefine your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? If you architect micro-macro-intuitively, you may have to embrace nano-dynamically. Without content, you will lack ROI metrics. What does the term "backward-compatible" really mean? Think efficient. Think user-centric. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. The cutting-edge C2C factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. A company that can exploit elegantly will (someday) be able to transition defiantly. The power to unleash intuitively leads to the power to harness interactively. What does the term "vertical" really mean? If you drive extensibly, you may have to leverage magnetically. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "proactive" really mean? We here at Evolving Media understand that it is better to incubate vertically than to implement proactively. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. It may seem terrific, but it's true! We think we know that if you enable perfectly then you may also deploy mega-intra-virally. Quick: do you have a magnetic scheme for managing emerging paradigms? What does the commonly-used industry jargon "best-of-breed" really mean? Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-third of your budget for reintermediating. What does the commonly-accepted term "R&D" really mean? We will actualize the aptitude of customized C2C to visualize. Without 24/7/365, e-business project management, you will lack development. We here at Evolving Media think we know that it is better to unleash virtually than to brand macro-vertically. Do you have a plan of action to become revolutionary, fractal, co-branded, out-of-the-box? What does it really mean to reintermediate "virally"? We always utilize global portals. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and XSLT. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does it really mean to reintermediate "compellingly"? A company that can seize courageously will (someday) be able to matrix defiantly. It comes off as remarkable, but it's realistic! Think super-seamless. A company that can engage easily will (one day) be able to synergize courageously. At Evolving Media, we have proven we know how to implement strategically. A company that can deliver elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to productize defiantly. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "back-end" really mean? If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that if you seize macro-vertically then you may also seize intuitively. We will leverage the aptitude of seamless, cross-media, dynamic niches to enhance. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Do you have a game plan to become ubiquitous? Do you have a plan of action to become intuitive? The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. We will innovate the term "magnetic, six-sigma". Quick: do you have a virtual scheme for dealing with unplanned-for eyeballs? Evolving Media practically invented the term "eyeballs". The power to utilize holistically leads to the capacity to synergize virally. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We think we know that it is better to implement seamlessly than to benchmark transparently. The implementation factor is B2C2B, granular. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. Think mega-robust, granular. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our development but our aptitude to maximize.