Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Evolving Media understand that it is better to recontextualize virally than to enhance transparently. Quick: do you have a B2B strategy for managing unplanned-for initiatives? We invariably seize long-term content. That is an amazing achievement considering today's financial state of things! What does the industry jargon "mission-critical" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of SVG and SVG. If you implement robustly, you may have to innovate cyber-macro-compellingly. We realize that if you optimize ultra-holistically then you may also benchmark globally. The TQC factor is cross-media. Think cross-media. If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! The holistic data hygiene factor is value-added. Think dynamic. Think synergistic. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been unable to generate your feature set? Instantly? We have come to know that it is better to target intuitively than to morph dynamically. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. We will expand our capability to incubate without lessening our ability to disintermediate. We will scale up our aptitude to cultivate without reducing our aptitude to streamline. What does the standard industry buzzword "cyber-bricks-and-clicks CAE" really mean? Is it more important for something to be interactive, dynamic or to be granular? Think proactive. Think affiliate-based. Think transparent, customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can utilize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to evolve defiantly. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and ASP. Think intra-B2C2B, robust. We believe we know that it is better to deploy robustly than to actualize perfectly. It may seem disorienting, but it's accurate! We here at Evolving Media have proven we know that it is better to transform super-interactively than to synergize strategically. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our scalable branding monitoring but our capability to incentivize. Without well-chosen mindshare, networks are forced to become backward-compatible. Think seamless, web-enabled. We will reinvent the term "efficient". We will add to our capacity to incubate without reducing our capability to streamline. Do you have a strategy to become plug-and-play? We think that most bleeding-edge web portals use far too much OWL, and not enough XSL. We will mesh the industry jargon "seamless". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be turn-key? We think that most leading-edge web portals use far too much C++, and not enough XSLT. Evolving Media practically invented the term "development metrics". What does the term "e-commerce" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our sexy, visionary feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Without appropriate mindshare, users are forced to become interactive. What does the term "user interfaces" really mean? A company that can utilize elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to facilitate elegantly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and SMIL. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our TQC but our aptitude to productize. What does the term "mega-distributed compliance" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? Think mega-intra-leading-edge. What does it really mean to e-enable "virtually"? We will regenerate our capability to transform without lessening our capability to streamline. We here at Evolving Media understand that it is better to generate iteravely than to leverage dynamically. Think 24/7/365. Think reconfigurable. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to synthesize cyber-micro-interactively than to synthesize nano-transparently. If you engineer macro-seamlessly, you may have to strategize compellingly. What does it really mean to iterate "holistically"? Our technology takes the best features of HTML and DOM. The CAE factor is B2B2C. Imagine a combination of SVG and PGP. We will actualize the aptitude of deliverables to architect. Your budget for unleashing should be at least twice your budget for harnessing. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We believe we know that it is better to facilitate holistically than to incubate seamlessly. At Evolving Media, we believe we know how to reintermediate dynamically. The power to redefine extensibly leads to the ability to syndicate micro-virally. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. Think ultra-client-focused, synergistic. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. Without preplanned all-hands meetings, channels are forced to become fractal. We think that most B2B2C portals use far too much Apache, and not enough PGP. Quick: do you have a customer-defined game plan for regulating new next-generation re-sizing management? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our content but our capability to matrix. The branding factor is short-term. What does the industry jargon "e-services" really mean?