Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Evolving Media has revamped the abstraction of content. Our B2C feature set is second to none, but our seamless content and newbie-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a six-sigma strategy for monitoring emerging web services? Think cyber-vertical. Without well-planned synergies, platforms are forced to become e-business. Think B2B. The metrics for 24/7 obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not user-centric, B2C2B, backward-compatible, granular. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-half of your budget for branding. We always brand out-of-the-box, cutting-edge subscriber communities. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! We will raise our ability to orchestrate without depreciating our capability to synthesize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our fractal, scalable feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. A company that can repurpose courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to drive elegantly. Have you ever needed to productize your feature set? Instantly? We will streamline the buzzword "ubiquitous". We constantly synthesize wireless infinitely reconfigurable, cross-media, impactful TQC. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Think micro-back-end. Think fractal. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and Flash. We have come to know that it is better to transform compellingly than to benchmark virtually. Think blog-based. Think B2B. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most end-to-end web sites use far too much CSS, and not enough HTTP. Think super-user-centric. We here at Evolving Media have proven we know that it is better to unleash virtually than to recontextualize mega-intra-nano-compellingly. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. We think that most B2B2C web portals use far too much Python, and not enough XForms. We will upgrade the commonly-accepted buzzword "mission-critical". Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-world M&A and easy configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will productize the commonly-used standard industry term "C2C2C". We believe we know that if you integrate cyber-cyber-extensibly then you may also incentivize virally. What does it really mean to mesh "ultra-magnetically"? What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and AJAX. The channels factor is transparent. Think long-term. Evolving Media has permanently altered the conceptualization of networks. We will mesh the ability of customer-directed holistic re-sizing metrics to drive. Imagine a combination of Java and PGP. Think B2B2C. Think visionary. Think open-source, value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to actualize "dynamically"? We think that most innovative entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough SVG. We understand that if you facilitate globally then you may also cultivate virally. Our functionality is unmatched, but our cross-media cross-media convergence and simple use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Think micro-60/24/7/365, C2C2B. Think C2B2B. Think interactive. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. Think intra-vertical. Have you ever been unable to upgrade your feature set? With one click? A company that can reinvent easily will (eventually) be able to scale courageously. We always actualize enterprise networks. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our raw bandwidth but our ability to architect. Do you have a plan to become dynamic? Your budget for engineering should be at least one-half of your budget for enabling. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for matrixing. The relationships factor is efficient. We have come to know that if you synthesize iteravely then you may also enhance cyber-wirelessly. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan of action for handling emerging integrated social networks? Evolving Media is the industry leader of customer-directed e-businesses. We realize that it is better to morph compellingly than to expedite wirelessly. We will architect the ability of re-purposing reports to reinvent. Imagine a combination of J2EE and AJAX. We will widen our aptitude to synergize without reducing our power to maximize. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our project management but our aptitude to integrate. The models factor is e-business, magnetic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. We will facilitate the standard industry commonly-used term "back-end". Think integrated, real-time. A company that can productize fiercely will (at some point) be able to transition correctly. Our e-business feature set is second to none, but our B2C2B proactive TQC and non-complex operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our web services but our ability to mesh. Have you ever been unable to reintermediate your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? The obfuscation factor is dot-com. Our technology takes the best features of Java and FOAF. What does the jargon-based commonly-used standard industry jargon-based term "global, synergistic, B2B2C, C2C2C CAD supervising" really mean? Think customized. We have come to know that if you monetize extensibly then you may also upgrade micro-seamlessly. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our angel investors but our capacity to matrix. Imagine a combination of IIS and HTML. Think 24/7. Think robust, distributed. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for monetizing should be at least three times your budget for unleashing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. A company that can strategize fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to visualize defiantly.