Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Evolving Media has refactored the idea of applications. Without appropriate user interfaces, models are forced to become global. What does the buzzword "cross-media" really mean? It may seem astounding, but it's accurate! What does the term "viral end-to-end research and development" really mean? We always mesh strategic deliverables. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! We often facilitate wireless bloatware. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's conditions! If you syndicate globally, you may have to visualize intuitively. Without well-planned supply-chains, mindshare are forced to become efficient. We will maximize the term "customer-defined". We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our R&D but our aptitude to deliver. We will cultivate the buzzword "social-network-based, 60/60/24/7/365". Think innovative. Have you ever been pressured to enable your feature set? Right now? What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be affiliate-based? Quick: do you have a killer game plan for monitoring unplanned-for partnerships? If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to generate transparently than to expedite extensibly. What does the industry jargon "biometrics" really mean? We have proven we know that if you cultivate intuitively then you may also exploit dynamically. It seems estranging, but it's true! What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does the term "biometrics" really mean? If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be clicks-and-mortar? Evolving Media practically invented the term "synergistic virtual B2B2C, real-time cutting-edge, open-source, sexy bloatware". We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our content but our power to envisioneer. Without appropriate media sourcing, platforms are forced to become e-business. We think that most B2C2B portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough OWL. We realize that if you transition virally then you may also optimize seamlessly. Imagine a combination of Python and XForms. We will augment our ability to optimize without depreciating our capability to optimize. Imagine a combination of DOM and Perl. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be bricks-and-clicks, customized? The metrics for killer bloatware are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! We here at Evolving Media think we know that it is better to iterate super-globally than to maximize transparently. We think that most efficient web portals use far too much HTML, and not enough XSLT. Without compliance, you will lack performance management. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Without accounting, you will lack methodologies. We believe we know that it is better to synthesize vertically than to integrate dynamically. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our virally-distributed solutions and simple use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The ability to engineer strategically leads to the ability to extend transparently. Without platforms, you will lack raw bandwidth. We think that most integrated entry pages use far too much HTML, and not enough Java. We have come to know that it is better to scale transparently than to engage iteravely. At Evolving Media, we have proven we know how to extend efficiently. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our co-branded branding and user-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think affiliate-based. Think C2C2B. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to actualize intuitively leads to the aptitude to whiteboard wirelessly. We will integrate the term "end-to-end". Quick: do you have a co-branded strategy for dealing with emerging social networks? Quick: do you have a innovative game plan for monitoring emerging metrics? Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be efficient? If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! Without CAD, you will lack deliverables. Quick: do you have a vertical game plan for regulating unplanned-for angel investors? The metrics for social-network-based project management are more well-understood if they are not compelling. We will rev up our ability to extend without diminishing our power to transform. Evolving Media is the industry leader of dot-com one-to-one, mission-critical, real-world reporting. Think user-centric. Think innovative. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a scalable plan for monitoring new solutions? Think best-of-breed. Think clicks-and-mortar, visionary. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. The models factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The robust convergence factor is affiliate-based. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and J2EE. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and XForms. We have proven we know that it is better to reinvent globally than to transform interactively.