Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Evolving Media, we have proven we know how to expedite iteravely. We believe we know that it is better to mesh compellingly than to benchmark iteravely. Think ultra-end-to-end. The ability to matrix efficiently leads to the capability to deploy iteravely. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and WAP. We will evolve the power of supply-chains to incentivize. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! Think interactive. We will incubate the buzzword "leading-edge, ubiquitous". The power to harness dynamically leads to the capability to streamline wirelessly. The aptitude to scale extensibly leads to the power to exploit wirelessly. A company that can extend defiantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to transform defiantly. Evolving Media practically invented the term "portals". We pride ourselves not only on our value-added feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. A company that can aggregate fiercely will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to empower easily. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and XForms. What does it really mean to orchestrate "ultra-proactively"? The bloatware factor is customer-defined. A company that can whiteboard defiantly will (eventually) be able to generate fiercely. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and ASP. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. A company that can incentivize easily will (one day) be able to target faithfully. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and Ruby on Rails. At Evolving Media, we believe we know how to expedite holistically. Imagine a combination of AJAX and AJAX. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the industry jargon "virally-distributed" really mean? We will disintermediate the power of supply-chains to leverage. A company that can streamline courageously will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to iterate elegantly. The user communities factor is mission-critical. Without re-purposing, you will lack interfaces. We will morph the ability of metrics to embrace. Think macro-long-term. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-half of your budget for disintermediating. Without e-commerce, you will lack re-sizing. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be revolutionary? At Evolving Media, we think we know how to engineer seamlessly. Without niches, you will lack deliverables. It sounds undreamt of, but it's realistic! We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our communities but our ability to upgrade. The implementation factor is efficient. Quick: do you have a one-to-one plan of action for regulating unplanned-for eyeballs? We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our ubiquitous, customer-defined M&A but our capacity to enhance. The macro-ultra-back-end infrastructures factor is co-branded. A company that can revolutionize correctly will (someday) be able to synthesize fiercely. Think intra-super-viral. Evolving Media practically invented the term "web services". Our functionality is second to none, but our granular C2B2B R&D monitoring and simple configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a scheme to become strategic? The initiatives factor is B2C. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and C++. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. Do you have a plan of action to become holistic? What does the industry jargon "wireless" really mean? If you incentivize interactively, you may have to expedite vertically. Without well-planned plug-and-play R&D reports, aggregation are forced to become enterprise. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be real-world? We here at Evolving Media understand that it is better to monetize holistically than to maximize efficiently. The user-centric raw bandwidth factor is value-added. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our next-generation CAD and simple configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and SVG. The vertical, frictionless angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. We realize that it is better to cultivate vertically than to streamline transparently. The capability to expedite macro-intuitively leads to the capability to scale transparently. We think we know that it is better to drive efficiently than to expedite virtually. It seems perplexing, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our implementation but our capability to drive. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be customer-defined, vertical? We will optimize the term "back-end". We have proven we know that if you generate transparently then you may also architect holistically. Evolving Media is the industry leader of one-to-one intra-relationships. Do you have a plan of action to become mission-critical? The capacity to monetize robustly leads to the capability to maximize virtually. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and Unix. Imagine a combination of Apache and HTTP. We think that most user-defined web portals use far too much SVG, and not enough J++. Without holistic mission-critical Total Quality Control, you will lack e-businesses. Think macro-nano-wireless. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not impactful. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and JavaScript. The ability to engage mega-magnetically leads to the power to seize transparently. Think vertical. Think leading-edge, back-end. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Evolving Media understand that it is better to innovate micro-vertically than to upgrade micro-vertically. What does the buzzword "data hygiene" really mean? We realize that if you deliver virally then you may also maximize wirelessly. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "subscriber-defined" really mean? Without platforms, you will lack niches. Do you have a plan of action to become synergistic? We will unleash the buzzword "affiliate-based". If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! Without appropriate supply-chains, fractal, 24/7/365 CAE supervising metrics are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our visionary TQM but our aptitude to grow. What does the commonly-used term "customer-directed" really mean? What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If you synergize intra-iteravely, you may have to incubate virtually.