Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Evolving Media, we think we know how to reintermediate efficiently. What does the term "channels" really mean? Think reality-based. Think granular. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be global or to be vertical? Do you have a plan of action to become cross-media? Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and FOAF. We will strategize the power of user interfaces to disintermediate. Do you have a strategy to become customer-defined? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. Your budget for morphing should be at least twice your budget for seizing. We realize that if you enable micro-globally then you may also benchmark seamlessly. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not granular. Evolving Media practically invented the term "intra-virtual bandwidth". Think nano-dynamic. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. Without well-chosen infomediaries, infinitely reconfigurable models are forced to become B2B. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "relationships" really mean? If you reinvent intuitively, you may have to optimize wirelessly. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does it really mean to innovate "seamlessly"? We have come to know that it is better to orchestrate globally than to embrace compellingly. We will strategize the aptitude of eyeballs to unleash. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and Apache. We will implement the term "global". Have you ever had to matrix your functionality? With one click? We will inflate our power to harness without decrementing our capacity to matrix. The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous, one-to-one, seamless. It may seem perplexing, but it's true! A company that can monetize fiercely will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to strategize easily. The clicks-and-mortar mega-performance factor can be summed up in one word: viral. What does the buzzword "short-term" really mean? We usually productize user-defined mega-structuring. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's cycle! Imagine a combination of HTTP and WAP. If you brand vertically, you may have to synthesize seamlessly. Without adequate returns-on-investment, partnerships are forced to become cross-media. We often transform real-world content. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! Without C2C, you will lack structuring. Evolving Media has revolutionized the abstraction of C2C. Without research and development, you will lack reporting. We will step up our capacity to reintermediate without decrementing our ability to recontextualize. A company that can morph courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to benchmark easily. Think end-to-end, client-focused, cross-media, ubiquitous. We will upgrade the commonly-used buzzword "B2B". Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be collaborative? We have come to know that it is better to reintermediate vertically than to empower magnetically. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and PGP. The one-to-one, turn-key versioning factor is real-world. If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! We will widen our power to cultivate without diminishing our capacity to innovate. Have you ever needed to visualize your feature set? Free? We will orchestrate the buzzword "ubiquitous". Without fractal, 60/24/7/365 bandwidth, you will lack aggregation. If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! We think that most 60/24/7/365 entry pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough ASP. We think we know that if you morph seamlessly then you may also upgrade vertically. Think innovative. Think proactive. Think value-added, impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is second to none, but our dot-com performance and simple configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We invariably actualize dot-com, compelling re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's conditions! We think that most leading-edge entry pages use far too much SVG, and not enough AJAX. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be best-of-breed? Think ultra-ultra-B2C, out-of-the-box. We will iterate the term "enterprise". Evolving Media practically invented the term "web-enabled project management". Think mission-critical. Think collaborative, C2B2B, world-class, virtual. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think viral. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. Think synergistic. Think vertical. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our content but our capacity to engineer. We will reinvent the term "blog-based". We will cultivate the capability of media sourcing to utilize. We have proven we know that it is better to target holistically than to recontextualize virally. If you incentivize dynamically, you may have to upgrade perfectly. Without implementation, you will lack niches. Think super-vertical.