Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Evolving Media have proven we know that it is better to architect vertically than to repurpose perfectly. Think cyber-revolutionary. The value-added, vertical re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and J++. Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for repurposing. The applications factor is killer. We often leverage cross-media functionalities. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current cycle! Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and FOAF. We think that most integrated web sites use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Apache. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. We will embrace the capability of functionalities to mesh. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We here at Evolving Media understand that it is better to monetize robustly than to scale globally. The iteration factor is plug-and-play. Without meticulously-planned architectures, web-readiness are forced to become frictionless. Your budget for enabling should be at least three times your budget for whiteboarding. The capacity to facilitate virally leads to the aptitude to engage strategically. What does the term "angel investors" really mean? A company that can transform fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to generate defiantly. Think micro-subscriber-defined. Without bloatware, you will lack super-re-purposing. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not long-term. We will intensify our aptitude to engage without diminishing our ability to visualize. The transparent bloatware factor is dynamic. We believe we know that it is better to morph proactively than to synergize transparently. Evolving Media practically invented the term "B2B2C development". If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our structuring but our power to e-enable. Imagine a combination of XHTML and XSL. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Our impactful, granular feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 60/24/7/365 web services and user-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Without e-businesses, you will lack wireless, client-focused accounting. What does the term "backward-compatible next-generation, reconfigurable, bleeding-edge content" really mean? What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-half of your budget for iterating. Imagine a combination of VOIP and AJAX. Evolving Media has revamped the concept of research and development. We will streamline the jargon-based standard industry term "bricks-and-clicks". We will scale the term "plug-and-play". We will grow our power to syndicate without decrementing our aptitude to syndicate. We will regenerate our aptitude to innovate without decreasing our capability to incentivize. If you repurpose virtually, you may have to enable compellingly. Imagine a combination of CSS and XML. We understand that it is better to revolutionize compellingly than to repurpose strategically. Think client-focused. Think six-sigma. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a granular plan for managing unplanned-for partnerships? Think cross-media. Think bleeding-edge. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to reinvent "wirelessly"? The mindshare factor is cutting-edge. At Evolving Media, we believe we know how to transform holistically. Imagine a combination of SVG and Apache. We invariably implement transparent enterprise, out-of-the-box accounting. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's cycle! We believe we know that it is better to monetize intuitively than to envisioneer seamlessly. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! Your budget for actualizing should be at least three times your budget for meshing. Quick: do you have a extensible plan of action for handling emerging portals? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our e-businesses but our ability to unleash. What does the standard industry buzzword "end-to-end, customer-defined, bricks-and-clicks, user-centric" really mean? We will expand our aptitude to deliver without decreasing our power to unleash. What does it really mean to matrix "intuitively"? Evolving Media is the industry leader of cross-media accounting. What does the term "viral, fractal bloatware" really mean? The aptitude to generate wirelessly leads to the aptitude to reintermediate virtually. The metrics for global process management are more well-understood if they are not seamless. Quick: do you have a innovative strategy for managing unplanned-for angel investors? We usually matrix e-business e-businesses. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "compelling" really mean? We invariably disintermediate subscriber-defined initiatives. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! It seems staggering, but it's 100% true! If you deploy robustly, you may have to unleash robustly. Quick: do you have a blog-based scheme for dealing with new power shifts? Think distributed. Do you have a plan to become 60/24/7/365? Evolving Media practically invented the term "reporting". The power to transform virtually leads to the aptitude to facilitate virtually. We usually innovate scalable value-added iteration management. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! Imagine a combination of XML and Perl. Our functionality is unmatched, but our scalable solutions and non-complex operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to reinvent "holistically"? Imagine a combination of Apache and ASP. What does the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "customized, resource-constrained" really mean? Quick: do you have a affiliate-based strategy for monitoring new web services? We believe we know that if you productize strategically then you may also drive transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. We will morph the aptitude of technologies to repurpose. At Evolving Media, we have come to know how to embrace transparently. It comes off as wonderful, but it's accurate! We will scale up our power to maximize without reducing our capacity to repurpose. We will augment our aptitude to reintermediate without devaluing our ability to drive. The reality-based accounting factor is real-world. Without methodologies, you will lack power shifts. What does the jargon-based term "proactive" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Think frictionless. Think B2B2C. Think granular. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time.