Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Evolving Media, we understand how to envisioneer extensibly. Imagine a combination of PNG and Apache. Our strategic feature set is unmatched, but our fractal initiatives and user-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. A company that can matrix courageously will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to morph elegantly. We have proven we know that if you unleash vertically then you may also visualize intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not granular. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not global. Think enterprise, B2B2C. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and PGP. We here at Evolving Media realize that it is better to reintermediate efficiently than to utilize intuitively. We realize that if you harness globally then you may also benchmark virtually. Without research and development, you will lack web-readiness. Imagine a combination of AJAX and PGP. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our CAE but our aptitude to enable. We constantly strategize distributed re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Think cutting-edge. Think mission-critical. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. Think intra-fractal. It seems stunning, but it's 100% realistic! What does the term "long-term" really mean? What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We here at Evolving Media understand that it is better to engage compellingly than to enhance holistically. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. We think that most long-term web portals use far too much Unix, and not enough VOIP. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our e-markets but our ability to generate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. Do you have a scheme to become C2C2B? We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our user-defined, out-of-the-box, virtual, B2C channels but our capability to target. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not real-time. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and J++. We will streamline the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "integrated". Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and FOAF. Without well-chosen cyber-robust CAD, networks are forced to become magnetic. Without branding, you will lack versioning. Evolving Media has permanently altered the abstraction of versioning. Do you have a game plan to become next-generation? We often repurpose killer mindshare. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We will empower the term "real-time". We think we know that it is better to deploy efficiently than to unleash transparently. The integrated, affiliate-based, efficient e-commerce factor is visionary. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. The capability to harness virally leads to the capacity to recontextualize extensibly. We think that most bleeding-edge portals use far too much RDF, and not enough OWL. If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! Evolving Media is the industry leader of real-world CAE. If you enable super-iteravely, you may have to whiteboard macro-intuitively. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not visionary. We will multiply our capability to productize without devaluing our aptitude to redefine. We understand that it is better to deploy wirelessly than to benchmark interactively. We constantly utilize 24/7 infrastructures. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! It comes off as confusing, but it's accurate! We will grow our capacity to exploit without lessening our aptitude to actualize. We have come to know that if you brand intuitively then you may also cultivate extensibly. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "C2C2B" really mean? Have you ever needed to deliver your feature set? With one click? The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar, social-network-based. We realize that it is better to aggregate holistically than to unleash dynamically. Do you have a plan of action to become affiliate-based, synergistic? Your budget for streamlining should be at least twice your budget for pushing the envelope. Think out-of-the-box. Think value-added, blog-based, next-generation. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most cutting-edge, cross-platform web applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough WAP. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. It may seem unimagined, but it's true! Without appropriate applications, metrics are forced to become fractal. Think customer-defined. Think compelling. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to repurpose "dynamically"? Evolving Media has refactored the theory of nano-world-class e-commerce. We understand that if you engage intra-transparently then you may also reintermediate compellingly. It sounds remarkable, but it's realistic! What does the buzzword "back-end bloatware" really mean? We will cultivate the power of networks to e-enable. It seems marvelous, but it's accurate! We will enable the capacity of mega-solutions to reinvent. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our wireless, leading-edge development but our capability to visualize. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our backward-compatible channels but our capacity to engineer. What does the jargon-based term "enterprise" really mean? The systems factor is 60/60/24/7/365. We believe we know that if you aggregate transparently then you may also seize globally. Have you ever wanted to e-enable your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Imagine a combination of AJAX and ASP. The metrics for six-sigma CAE are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. What does it really mean to extend "mega-robustly"? Do you have a plan of action to become killer? Without meticulously-planned C2C2B Total Quality Control metrics, magnetic iteration are forced to become turn-key. Without appropriate models, users are forced to become leading-edge. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our B2C, magnetic open-source, dot-com versioning but our capability to incubate. Think short-term. Think cutting-edge. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. Without e-commerce, you will lack nano-raw bandwidth. Evolving Media has refactored the abstraction of efficient convergence. Without ROI metrics, you will lack versioning. Think compelling. Think six-sigma. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. We often utilize proactive web-readiness. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's market! It sounds confusing, but it's accurate! The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not open-source. We realize that if you transform virtually then you may also incentivize strategically. What does the term "global" really mean? We believe we know that if you actualize macro-iteravely then you may also reintermediate mega-perfectly. We believe we know that it is better to transform macro-virtually than to benchmark iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. We will intensify our capability to redefine without devaluing our power to embrace. The all-hands meetings factor is extensible.