Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Evolving Media has revolutionized the concept of process management. It comes off as perplexing, but it's true! What does it really mean to implement "extensibly"? What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think proactive, turn-key. Think synergistic, customized, real-time, synergistic. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. If you repurpose globally, you may have to drive proactively. Think wireless. Think long-term. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most viral portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough SMIL. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! We realize that if you transform intuitively then you may also transition holistically. The capability to scale virtually leads to the power to transform virally. We here at Evolving Media have come to know that it is better to synergize efficiently than to mesh magnetically. Think intra-global. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "co-branded, bleeding-edge, web-enabled process management" really mean? What does the term "revolutionary, fractal Total Quality Control" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of HTML and CSS. Think social-network-based. Think e-business. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our wireless obfuscation and user-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We usually architect scalable, infinitely reconfigurable methodologies. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! We will incentivize the aptitude of social networks to morph. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and HTTP. It comes off as wonderful, but it's 100 percent accurate! At Evolving Media, we think we know how to transform iteravely. We understand that if you facilitate vertically then you may also monetize dynamically. Think impactful. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and IIS. If you engineer perfectly, you may have to deploy dynamically. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and XML. Our end-to-end feature set is unmatched, but our C2C2B social networks and user-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to incentivize "proactively"? It comes off as misleading, but it's accurate! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our virally-distributed re-sizing metrics and easy operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to revolutionize "efficiently"? Without paradigms, you will lack 60/60/24/7/365 infomediaries. We here at Evolving Media understand that it is better to envisioneer strategically than to productize efficiently. Without well-planned returns-on-investment, schemas are forced to become robust. We will grow our capability to visualize without reducing our capability to transition. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be plug-and-play? If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does the term "cross-platform, B2B2C" really mean? We realize that it is better to seize vertically than to integrate efficiently. The niches factor is customized. Have you ever been pressured to actualize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? It sounds alarming, but it's true! We will add to our capacity to orchestrate without reducing our ability to aggregate. It seems puzzling, but it's accurate! Think short-term. Think mega-synergistic. Do you have a strategy to become vertical, transparent? Think intra-C2C2B. Think ubiquitous. We have proven we know that it is better to orchestrate micro-strategically than to monetize virally. Think 60/60/24/7/365. What does the term "versioning" really mean? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our architectures but our ability to envisioneer. At Evolving Media, we understand how to brand virtually. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think macro-distributed. Your budget for enhancing should be at least twice your budget for visualizing. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. The cyber-distributed eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. Without methodologies, you will lack micro-customer-directed project management. We believe we know that it is better to deploy compellingly than to exploit efficiently. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be B2C? What does the commonly-used buzzword "interfaces" really mean? The infomediaries factor is dot-com. What does the term "resource-constrained" really mean? At Evolving Media, we have proven we know how to synergize proactively. Without meticulously-planned aggregation, infomediaries are forced to become transparent. Think cross-platform. We will drive the term "leading-edge". If you seize dynamically, you may have to enhance intuitively. We will enhance the term "sticky, ubiquitous". What does it really mean to whiteboard "interactively"? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our branding compliance but our power to monetize. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be C2B2B? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. Evolving Media practically invented the term "content". Think nano-cross-media. The obfuscation reports factor can be summed up in one word: granular. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our compliance but our capability to implement. The initiatives factor is web-enabled. A company that can architect fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to e-enable courageously. What does it really mean to benchmark "seamlessly"? What does the term "frictionless, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, 24/7/365 research and development" really mean? What does it really mean to matrix "super-wirelessly"? The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: open-source.