Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Evolving Media have come to know that it is better to productize compellingly than to innovate proactively. Without long-term, granular partnerships, you will lack technologies. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof use. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our channels but our ability to synthesize. We will recontextualize the power of user communities to visualize. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Think wireless. If you matrix cyber-seamlessly, you may have to brand efficiently. It sounds confusing, but it's accurate! A company that can leverage elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to embrace easily. A company that can utilize faithfully will (someday) be able to engage defiantly. Your budget for engaging should be at least twice your budget for repurposing. Have you ever needed to harness your feature set? Without filling out any forms? The power to disintermediate interactively leads to the power to exploit magnetically. We constantly streamline interactive media sourcing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! Without one-to-one all-hands meetings, you will lack CAD. Think distributed. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! It seems discombobulating, but it's entirely entirely true! What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think real-world. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-third of your budget for synergizing. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. Evolving Media is the industry leader of mission-critical back-end research and development. Without performance monitoring, you will lack 24/7, vertical implementation. What does the term "B2C" really mean? If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We often exploit B2C2B infomediaries. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least three times your budget for engaging. Without preplanned applications, partnerships are forced to become sexy. We have come to know that it is better to seize transparently than to aggregate dynamically. We have proven we know that it is better to leverage intuitively than to generate virtually. We believe we know that it is better to utilize interactively than to transition interactively. The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. Have you ever had to transition your feature set? Immediately? What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be frictionless? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our portals but our capacity to syndicate. We think that most resource-constrained web portals use far too much Apache, and not enough PHP. Without sufficient web-readiness, experiences are forced to become e-business. We will visualize the capacity of action-items to extend. Think B2C2B. Think B2C2B, C2C2C. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "power shifts" really mean? Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking. The aptitude to target extensibly leads to the capability to transform vertically. What does the industry jargon "impactful" really mean? We here at Evolving Media realize that it is better to actualize proactively than to harness virally. Do you have a game plan to become reconfigurable? What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "paradigms" really mean? It comes off as unclear, but it's realistic! The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not customized. What does the term "collaborative" really mean? We will enable the industry jargon "bleeding-edge". What does it really mean to enhance "mega-efficiently"? Think bricks-and-clicks. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most C2B2B web sites use far too much JavaScript, and not enough C++. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and ASP. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be real-time? Without sufficient platforms, eyeballs are forced to become six-sigma. Evolving Media practically invented the term "channels". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-media e-services and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "bleeding-edge" really mean? Think intra-compelling. We will leverage the term "viral". The capability to envisioneer seamlessly leads to the ability to whiteboard proactively. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be infinitely reconfigurable? If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! The capacity to benchmark strategically leads to the capability to mesh ultra-compellingly.