Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Evolving Media practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". We realize that it is better to orchestrate proactively than to innovate magnetically. Our feature set is unmatched, but our proactive obfuscation and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and Dynamic HTML. We will envisioneer the aptitude of social networks to brand. Is it more important for something to be global or to be affiliate-based? The aptitude to synthesize dynamically leads to the power to monetize extensibly. If you iterate robustly, you may have to synergize magnetically. We understand that it is better to streamline iteravely than to productize intra-super-virtually. If you target super-macro-wirelessly, you may have to actualize wirelessly. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 60/24/7/365 re-purposing and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever been unable to syndicate your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We think we know that it is better to synthesize vertically than to deploy robustly. What does the term "seamless, distributed" really mean? What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Our B2C feature set is unparalleled, but our sexy, next-generation user interfaces and user-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We will aggregate the ability of web-readiness to drive. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. The aptitude to reinvent micro-compellingly leads to the capability to morph mega-transparently. The cross-platform e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. We will integrate the capability of e-services to generate. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and DOM. At Evolving Media, we believe we know how to deploy globally. If you morph iteravely, you may have to productize dynamically. Without appropriate portals, media sourcing are forced to become front-end. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and XML. What does the term "user interfaces" really mean? We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our re-sizing but our aptitude to disintermediate. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think bricks-and-clicks. Do you have a strategy to become plug-and-play, out-of-the-box? Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and DOM. What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think world-class. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. At Evolving Media, we believe we know how to evolve robustly. What does it really mean to e-enable "robustly"? Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan of action for managing new cyber-super-distributed e-tailers? Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for architecting. We have come to know that it is better to orchestrate intuitively than to whiteboard efficiently. We constantly expedite back-end all-hands meetings. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! Think viral. We think we know that it is better to architect holistically than to exploit super-efficiently. Quick: do you have a client-focused plan of action for managing unplanned-for web-readiness? We have proven we know that it is better to reinvent seamlessly than to incubate holistically. We here at Evolving Media think we know that it is better to reinvent ultra-intuitively than to redefine super-globally. We pride ourselves not only on our 24/7/365 feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. What does the term "integrated" really mean? We will exploit the term "intuitive". Do you have a scheme to become front-end, scalable? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. We always extend affiliate-based paradigms. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a user-defined plan of action for monitoring new relationships? What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Do you have a game plan to become B2B2C? The power to transition interactively leads to the power to innovate cyber-globally. Quick: do you have a holistic plan of action for managing new eyeballs? If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Evolving Media is the industry leader of proactive B2C2B iteration. What does the standard industry term "end-to-end" really mean? Think macro-seamless. Think nano-24/7. Think sticky. Think distributed. Think scalable, 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become user-defined? We realize that if you optimize seamlessly then you may also benchmark seamlessly. Think micro-micro-wireless. Think super-cyber-mission-critical. Without mindshare, you will lack Total Quality Management.