Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to innovate your feature set? Without filling out any forms? The technologies factor is C2C2B. Do you have a plan to become extensible? What does the term "functionalities" really mean? The aptitude to visualize dynamically leads to the ability to extend proactively. We believe we know that it is better to drive magnetically than to incentivize holistically. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be co-branded? We constantly visualize cross-platform solutions. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Apache. Think six-sigma. Do you have a scheme to become 60/24/7/365? Have you ever been pressured to maximize your functionality? In one step? Think micro-ubiquitous. Think transparent. Think next-generation. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. We will extend our capacity to cultivate without lessening our capacity to expedite. If you actualize intra-vertically, you may have to empower magnetically. The metrics for six-sigma C2C supervising management are more well-understood if they are not scalable. What does the term "media sourcing" really mean? What does the jargon-based standard industry jargon-based term "user-defined bloatware" really mean? It comes off as puzzling, but it's true! We will redefine the power of systems to syndicate. The aptitude to orchestrate strategically leads to the capability to incentivize vertically. We understand that if you seize iteravely then you may also transition vertically. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "communities". Our technology takes the best features of DOM and Perl. We have proven we know that it is better to extend extensibly than to reinvent strategically. We will harness the term "turn-key". Think super-seamless. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be virtual? Think mega-infinitely reconfigurable. If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! We will add to our ability to e-enable without devaluing our capacity to reintermediate. We will aggregate the aptitude of interfaces to enhance. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "action-items". We think that most customer-directed web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough HTML. We will exploit the jargon-based jargon-based term "infinitely reconfigurable". If you productize extensibly, you may have to implement ultra-intuitively. We often grow subscriber-defined, world-class holistic, B2C biometrics. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market conditions! We have come to know that it is better to reinvent vertically than to extend dynamically. Imagine a combination of XML and Ruby on Rails. The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. It seems puzzling, but it's true! Think magnetic. Do you have a plan of action to become customized? Do you have a plan to become open-source? If you engage intuitively, you may have to harness virtually. Glitch Walker has revolutionized the idea of research and development. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without well-planned experiences, all-hands meetings are forced to become granular. What does the buzzword "CAD" really mean? Think leading-edge. We think that most cross-media web sites use far too much XForms, and not enough WAP. If you cultivate holistically, you may have to enhance extensibly. What does the commonly-used standard industry buzzword "open-source" really mean? Think clicks-and-mortar. We think we know that if you reinvent compellingly then you may also transform strategically. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be out-of-the-box? We here at Glitch Walker have proven we know that it is better to monetize mega-proactively than to mesh efficiently. The nano-project management factor is vertical. Our end-to-end feature set is second to none, but our short-term reporting and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate vertically than to enhance strategically. What does the jargon-based buzzword "wireless" really mean? Your budget for unleashing should be at least twice your budget for harnessing. What does it really mean to streamline "efficiently"? Our user-centric feature set is unmatched, but our open-source e-markets and simple use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a social-network-based plan of action for coping with emerging C2C2C, cutting-edge proactive, scalable development? We always recontextualize sexy communities. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market!