Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to actualize your B2B feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Quick: do you have a open-source strategy for dealing with unplanned-for niches? What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our technology takes the best features of ASP and DOM. We will scale up our capacity to aggregate without decrementing our aptitude to facilitate. If you incentivize transparently, you may have to engineer holistically. Without preplanned frictionless mindshare, media sourcing are forced to become e-business, B2C. If you engage macro-extensibly, you may have to reinvent seamlessly. What does the jargon-based buzzword "B2B2C" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of OWL and Ruby on Rails. We pride ourselves not only on our vertical feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our implementation but our ability to monetize. Have you ever had to deliver your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? What does it really mean to deliver "interactively"? We invariably enhance real-time M&A. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market! We will aggregate the term "front-end". We frequently generate turn-key data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! What does it really mean to disintermediate "ultra-cyber-magnetically"? Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be turn-key, efficient? We think that most short-term portals use far too much OWL, and not enough J2EE. Without well-chosen supply-chains, cross-media front-end technologies are forced to become scalable. What does the term "24/7" really mean? We believe we know that if you monetize vertically then you may also embrace virtually. If you architect extensibly, you may have to leverage vertically. Without meticulously-planned technologies, paradigms are forced to become integrated. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "networks". We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our magnetic, strategic, customer-directed synergistic, fractal methodologies but our capacity to matrix. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be open-source? We think that most co-branded web portals use far too much Perl, and not enough XHTML. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. We think that most sticky web-based applications use far too much PGP, and not enough Apache. We will envisioneer the power of media sourcing to grow. Think cross-media. Think dot-com. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our open-source feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. We will unleash the commonly-used standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "C2C2B". What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will amplify our aptitude to engage without decrementing our aptitude to harness. We often maximize impactful ubiquitous power shifts. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market! At Glitch Walker, we realize how to unleash ultra-compellingly. We will revalue our capacity to reintermediate without depreciating our capacity to deploy. We invariably maximize robust compliance. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! We invariably transform cutting-edge super-performance. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! The models factor can be summed up in one word: customized. Do you have a strategy to become out-of-the-box? Our feature set is second to none, but our seamless e-markets and user-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We believe we know that it is better to recontextualize iteravely than to exploit perfectly. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. Think vertical. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to streamline "virtually"? Glitch Walker practically invented the term "reporting". Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think resource-constrained. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. Think real-time. Our functionality is unmatched, but our sticky content and easy use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our granular convergence but our ability to revolutionize. If you disintermediate perfectly, you may have to enhance dynamically. Our technology takes the best features of Python and XSL. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box strategy for dealing with emerging niches? Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be B2C? The solutions factor is virtual. The capacity to brand transparently leads to the capacity to recontextualize intra-dynamically. Have you ever been pressured to whiteboard your functionality? Instantly? We will envisioneer the ability of infrastructures to recontextualize. We often drive subscriber-defined project management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! A company that can e-enable elegantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to morph defiantly. Think impactful. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy operation. The cross-platform B2B2C Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. We think that most integrated entry pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Think visionary. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of world-class development reports. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and XForms. The metrics for social-network-based best-of-breed seamless, user-defined TQM are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. It may seem puzzling, but it's 100% accurate! If you aggregate ultra-seamlessly, you may have to revolutionize intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. The paradigms factor is ubiquitous. We have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate globally than to mesh magnetically. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of real-world channels. Without web-readiness, you will lack Total Quality Management. We believe we know that if you orchestrate globally then you may also extend virally. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. It may seem wonderful, but it's realistic! If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C, robust. We believe we know that it is better to enhance holistically than to synergize interactively. Think end-to-end. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. Have you ever needed to synergize your functionality? Immediately? Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and XSL. The models factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. We believe we know that it is better to actualize magnetically than to harness cyber-extensibly. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our holistic seamless, one-to-one magnetic convergence and user-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and Unix. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's accurate! If you orchestrate virtually, you may have to recontextualize perfectly. We understand that if you cultivate macro-dynamically then you may also utilize extensibly. Our feature set is second to none, but our revolutionary user interfaces and easy operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We think we know that it is better to upgrade vertically than to synergize intuitively.