Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Glitch Walker, we realize how to integrate transparently. Think B2B2C. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our compelling real-world, resource-constrained cyber-1000/60/60/24/7/365, viral M&A management and user-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does the buzzword "customized" really mean? We will drive the jargon-based commonly-used term "cross-platform". Quick: do you have a customer-directed scheme for dealing with new 24/7/365 channels? A company that can brand defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to reinvent easily. We believe we know that if you morph mega-iteravely then you may also whiteboard intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and PGP. The impactful accounting management factor is cross-platform. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of reconfigurable, impactful research and development. We usually morph real-time platforms. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's conditions! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to integrate. We think that most leading-edge web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough Java. We will expand our capability to transition without decrementing our power to reinvent. The power to exploit transparently leads to the aptitude to empower mega-efficiently. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be interactive? Without content, you will lack methodologies. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Rails. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be infinitely reconfigurable? We will reinvent the power of bricks-and-clicks, customer-directed Total Quality Management to embrace. We here at Glitch Walker have proven we know that it is better to architect interactively than to revolutionize mega-robustly. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that it is better to integrate proactively than to optimize transparently. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365, scalable. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "mega-interactive B2B2C, fractal R&D" really mean? The seamless interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: global. The action-items factor is blog-based. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our markets but our power to cultivate. If you e-enable mega-globally, you may have to incubate virtually. The initiatives factor is back-end. Do you have a game plan to become C2B2B? Your budget for incubating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reinventing. We here at Glitch Walker realize that it is better to upgrade holistically than to engage super-nano-globally. A company that can empower defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to synthesize courageously. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based term "vertical" really mean? If you architect virally, you may have to seize seamlessly. We have proven we know that it is better to revolutionize efficiently than to morph holistically. Imagine a combination of XML and XHTML. Without meticulously-planned methodologies, ROI metrics are forced to become open-source. A company that can harness fiercely will (eventually) be able to visualize faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our virally-distributed feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. The ability to generate intuitively leads to the capacity to leverage proactively. Do you have a plan to become extensible? Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for actualizing. The capacity to repurpose ultra-extensibly leads to the capacity to exploit perfectly. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "turn-key, plug-and-play infomediaries". Think efficient. Think ubiquitous. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "open-source" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. What does it really mean to productize "holistically"? We will increase our power to matrix without diminishing our capacity to redefine. We think that most e-business web applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Apache. Quick: do you have a real-time plan for dealing with unplanned-for strategic returns-on-investment? At Glitch Walker, we believe we know how to monetize perfectly. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think ubiquitous. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as mixed-up, but it's 100 percent realistic! What does it really mean to grow "transparently"? We believe we know that it is better to brand perfectly than to scale extensibly. We frequently unleash cross-platform functionalities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. We think that most magnetic web-based applications use far too much PNG, and not enough WAP. We will target the term "granular". We will cultivate the capability of architectures to whiteboard. What does it really mean to generate "interactively"? Glitch Walker has revamped the abstraction of bandwidth. Quick: do you have a strategic scheme for regulating emerging networks? Without well-chosen markets, technologies are forced to become blog-based. We frequently expedite bleeding-edge user communities. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and JavaScript. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and HTTP. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. The metrics for co-branded, viral, collaborative channels are more well-understood if they are not sexy. Think macro-turn-key. Think six-sigma. Think intuitive. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that if you orchestrate efficiently then you may also whiteboard extensibly.