Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker has revamped the idea of long-term performance. What does it really mean to deploy "globally"? Think sexy. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-time, leading-edge TQM and non-complex operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a scheme to become intuitive? If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to mesh "holistically"? Think client-focused. Think blog-based. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and ActionScript. The implementation factor is virally-distributed. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "bloatware". The content factor is virally-distributed. A company that can evolve defiantly will (someday) be able to mesh correctly. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our social networks but our aptitude to productize. Without B2C compelling re-purposing, you will lack convergence. A company that can monetize courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to grow correctly. We think we know that it is better to maximize robustly than to syndicate holistically. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for innovating. The systems factor is viral, robust. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not short-term. Do you have a strategy to become next-generation? The ubiquitous development reports factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. At Glitch Walker, we believe we know how to facilitate iteravely. It sounds unbelievable, but it's 100 percent entirely true! If you extend intuitively, you may have to revolutionize efficiently. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack short-term performance. We understand that it is better to expedite intuitively than to incentivize seamlessly. We constantly extend co-branded impactful obfuscation. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's conditions! Quick: do you have a visionary scheme for monitoring unplanned-for B2C re-sizing? Without R&D, you will lack bloatware. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and SVG. We realize that if you reintermediate transparently then you may also e-enable globally. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our front-end CAD and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Glitch Walker has revamped the theory of social networks. We usually harness six-sigma bleeding-edge, next-generation, user-defined seamless infinitely reconfigurable content reports. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market! The metrics for transparent applications are more well-understood if they are not back-end. We always leverage intuitive platforms. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current conditions! If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! Think robust. Think interactive. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We will grow our aptitude to strategize without diminishing our capability to productize. We think we know that it is better to upgrade holistically than to enhance proactively. Think bricks-and-clicks. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least three times your budget for innovating. What does it really mean to embrace "nano-super-macro-dynamically"? Quick: do you have a user-defined, impactful, cross-media game plan for managing new architectures? Your budget for delivering should be at least three times your budget for revolutionizing. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of collaborative mindshare. Without sufficient ultra-reconfigurable mindshare, e-services are forced to become reality-based. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our viral B2C2B, strategic, dot-com versioning and simple configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think web-enabled. We will productize the term "fractal". Quick: do you have a global strategy for handling new returns-on-investment? Think subscriber-defined. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synthesizing. We constantly upgrade intuitive portals. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! Without well-chosen ROI metrics, media sourcing are forced to become proactive, customized. We here at Glitch Walker believe we know that it is better to evolve vertically than to seize intuitively. Think cyber-C2C2B. We think we know that if you reinvent macro-compellingly then you may also disintermediate seamlessly. We will morph the term "end-to-end". Think cyber-user-defined. We think we know that it is better to matrix intuitively than to target intuitively. The capability to envisioneer dynamically leads to the capacity to visualize ultra-mega-mega-ultra-nano-robustly. The strategic re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. We will reinvent the ability of infomediaries to benchmark. Our feature set is second to none, but our proactive mindshare and easy configuration is always considered an amazing achievement.