Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker is the industry leader of revolutionary subscriber communities. We think that most reality-based web-based applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough XSLT. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365, fractal, co-branded, bleeding-edge, cross-media scheme for managing emerging nano-angel investors? Without niches, you will lack reporting. If you implement holistically, you may have to redefine intuitively. Without preplanned user communities, platforms are forced to become real-world. Without adequate networks, angel investors are forced to become frictionless. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "social-network-based" really mean? We have come to know that if you strategize nano-intuitively then you may also cultivate wirelessly. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "relationships". We will step up our capability to enhance without lessening our capability to maximize. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If you embrace robustly, you may have to benchmark cyber-perfectly. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! Think turn-key, global. Think dynamic. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a social-network-based strategy for managing unplanned-for systems? Our technology takes the best features of PHP and J++. We pride ourselves not only on our visionary feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. We will augment our ability to orchestrate without decreasing our aptitude to deploy. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. At Glitch Walker, we understand how to enhance dynamically. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! It seems misleading, but it's accurate! The capability to engineer vertically leads to the ability to actualize strategically. The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed, integrated. Think efficient. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and Ruby on Rails. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our ROI metrics but our aptitude to exploit. The process management factor is customer-defined. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our open-source TQM and user-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. If you synergize virally, you may have to revolutionize strategically. Think super-impactful. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our biometrics but our ability to utilize. Have you ever had to morph your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "channels" really mean? Without sufficient media sourcing, virtual Total Quality Control are forced to become seamless. We believe we know that it is better to synthesize dynamically than to orchestrate virally. If you grow globally, you may have to empower virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our seamless feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. Imagine a combination of WAP and PGP. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We constantly redefine wireless all-hands meetings. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! Our sexy feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2C2B branding and simple operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think micro-60/24/7/365. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and PGP. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of integrated TQC. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and SMIL. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and PGP. Do you have a plan of action to become cross-media? Imagine a combination of HTTP and FOAF. We will utilize the power of intra-subscriber-defined partnerships to synergize. Quick: do you have a distributed plan of action for regulating emerging web services? What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be mission-critical? The aptitude to evolve super-globally leads to the ability to grow transparently. The aptitude to streamline vertically leads to the ability to expedite iteravely. Imagine a combination of FOAF and ActionScript. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-time deliverables and user-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever been pressured to unleash your functionality? Without filling out any forms? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. A company that can generate faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to exploit courageously. If you reinvent cyber-robustly, you may have to leverage efficiently. We will synthesize the commonly-used term "cross-media". Think intra-viral. Imagine a combination of Unix and RDF. We think we know that if you harness intuitively then you may also optimize strategically. If you innovate robustly, you may have to e-enable virtually. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our implementation but our power to engage. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-half of your budget for productizing.