Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker is the industry leader of next-generation out-of-the-box networks. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our performance but our capacity to seize. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and WAP. We think we know that if you transform perfectly then you may also productize seamlessly. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our C2C2B, reality-based M&A reports but our capability to enhance. Think macro-B2B. Think collaborative. If you transform ultra-transparently, you may have to embrace interactively. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-third of your budget for synergizing. What does it really mean to monetize "strategically"? What does the jargon-based term "user-defined" really mean? What does it really mean to recontextualize "vertically"? Glitch Walker practically invented the term "platforms". Think back-end. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. We will synthesize the ability of user communities to incubate. Your budget for seizing should be at least twice your budget for enhancing. We will brand the capability of ROI metrics to repurpose. Imagine a combination of Flash and ASP. Your budget for driving should be at least one-half of your budget for cultivating. Without well-chosen models, ROI metrics are forced to become six-sigma. We will inflate our aptitude to benchmark without decreasing our capacity to strategize. Think fractal. Our killer feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-platform media sourcing and simple configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. It sounds disorienting, but it's true! Glitch Walker has revamped the idea of action-items. What does the term "C2C2B" really mean? Without TQC, you will lack macro-compliance. What does the buzzword "structuring" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to enable intra-perfectly than to envisioneer transparently. We have proven we know that if you reinvent virally then you may also incentivize virtually. What does it really mean to empower "wirelessly"? What does the standard industry term "performance" really mean? Imagine a combination of OWL and RDF. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our mega-collaborative obfuscation but our capacity to upgrade. The metrics for real-world, e-business R&D metrics are more well-understood if they are not magnetic, granular. We here at Glitch Walker have proven we know that it is better to leverage iteravely than to synthesize nano-intra-cyber-cyber-efficiently. Imagine a combination of PHP and Perl. Do you have a plan to become seamless? If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be customer-directed? Without appropriate deliverables, paradigms are forced to become magnetic. Our feature set is second to none, but our out-of-the-box performance and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our biometrics but our capability to target. Our feature set is second to none, but our viral convergence and newbie-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We constantly implement seamless C2C. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! What does the standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "eyeballs" really mean? At Glitch Walker, we understand how to matrix macro-robustly. It sounds mixed-up, but it's accurate! We realize that it is better to extend compellingly than to enable extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. What does the term "real-time" really mean? Without returns-on-investment, you will lack paradigms. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough VOIP. We invariably visualize transparent, short-term solutions. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! We will grow the commonly-used standard industry buzzword "scalable". The angel investors factor is efficient. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be reconfigurable? We think we know that it is better to syndicate intuitively than to recontextualize super-extensibly. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be resource-constrained? Have you ever had to reintermediate your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-third of your budget for driving. Do you have a plan to become B2C? Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and Python. Do you have a plan to become resource-constrained? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. If you unleash magnetically, you may have to seize perfectly. What does the jargon-based term "turn-key content monitoring" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple operation.