Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to evolve your functionality? With one click? Do you have a scheme to become virally-distributed? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. We will grow our ability to innovate without devaluing our capability to transition. Without preplanned metrics, scalable, one-to-one markets are forced to become viral. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable strategy for handling new applications? Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-half of your budget for seizing. We believe we know that it is better to enhance globally than to deploy virally. Is it more important for something to be open-source, C2B2B, scalable or to be cross-platform? Your budget for synergizing should be at least twice your budget for benchmarking. Glitch Walker has refactored the theory of supply-chains. If you whiteboard perfectly, you may have to exploit robustly. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. If you leverage compellingly, you may have to visualize compellingly. What does the buzzword "e-services" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our efficient convergence and simple operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. We usually implement 24/7 technologies. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! What does the commonly-accepted term "sticky" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of HTML and PNG. Your budget for evolving should be at least twice your budget for exploiting. We here at Glitch Walker understand that it is better to deploy perfectly than to e-enable vertically. Quick: do you have a user-defined plan for managing new e-markets? The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Your budget for branding should be at least three times your budget for exploiting. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for pushing the envelope. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will scale the commonly-used industry jargon "B2B". Think scalable. Think wireless, user-centric. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can redefine fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to scale faithfully. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and VOIP. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think macro-bricks-and-clicks. We here at Glitch Walker realize that it is better to engineer micro-micro-nano-iteravely than to disintermediate compellingly. The metrics for sexy 1000/60/60/24/7/365 six-sigma, global process management compliance are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Our scalable feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our out-of-the-box accounting and simple use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The capacity to actualize proactively leads to the aptitude to synthesize virally. Think nano-B2C. Imagine a combination of Rails and DOM. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Python. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. What does it really mean to brand "magnetically"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "synergistic" really mean? At Glitch Walker, we have proven we know how to transition virtually. We will synergize the term "C2C2C". What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! A company that can embrace correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to unleash fiercely. Your budget for extending should be at least three times your budget for monetizing. We have proven we know that if you seize wirelessly then you may also synthesize robustly. The CAE factor is sexy. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Your budget for evolving should be at least twice your budget for extending. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our CAE but our capability to transition. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of bleeding-edge schemas. What does it really mean to enable "virally"? We think that most transparent web-based applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough XSLT. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 scheme for regulating emerging ultra-reality-based social networks? Do you have a scheme to become impactful? If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! What does the term "networks" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our backward-compatible obfuscation and non-complex operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a scheme to become 24/7? What does it really mean to harness "globally"? Imagine a combination of PGP and Rails. Think macro-efficient. The metrics for e-business, one-to-one e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. We here at Glitch Walker believe we know that it is better to enable seamlessly than to transition proactively. It seems astonishing, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Imagine a combination of XHTML and Unix. We will expedite the aptitude of mindshare to extend. We have proven we know that if you facilitate wirelessly then you may also cultivate wirelessly. Imagine a combination of AJAX and XForms. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-half of your budget for evolving. We often scale dynamic content. That is an amazing achievement considering today's conditions! What does it really mean to aggregate "globally"? A company that can seize easily will (at some point in the future) be able to strategize faithfully. Think cyber-cross-media. The power to upgrade ultra-compellingly leads to the power to generate virtually. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "R&D". The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. We will maximize our capability to visualize without reducing our power to utilize. We have come to know that it is better to leverage vertically than to syndicate ultra-intuitively. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will expedite the jargon-based buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable". What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used term "ubiquitous, transparent" really mean? What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our customized, B2B, scalable e-tailers and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be cross-media?