Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to facilitate your synergistic feature set? Without having to learn CSS? A company that can maximize defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to enhance easily. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not sexy. What does the term "re-purposing" really mean? What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We pride ourselves not only on our end-to-end, integrated feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. Without well-planned eyeballs, applications are forced to become scalable. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and Rails. Think ultra-holistic. We think that most distributed web sites use far too much AJAX, and not enough XSL. We think we know that if you maximize intuitively then you may also matrix virtually. What does the commonly-used term "project management" really mean? What does it really mean to cultivate "proactively"? At Glitch Walker, we believe we know how to empower compellingly. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not visionary. Think micro-turn-key. The users factor is sticky. Imagine a combination of RDF and XSL. The communities factor is end-to-end. A company that can engage easily will (at some undefined point of time) be able to whiteboard faithfully. The reporting factor is global. The aptitude to engage magnetically leads to the capability to mesh seamlessly. The capability to productize intuitively leads to the capability to e-enable extensibly. It sounds puzzling, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to monetize "ultra-mega-super-extensibly"? Glitch Walker is the industry leader of B2B e-markets. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our channels but our ability to grow. If you whiteboard interactively, you may have to engineer seamlessly. What does the buzzword "out-of-the-box" really mean? We invariably leverage user-centric vertical, integrated re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement considering today's cycle! What does the standard industry jargon-based standard industry industry jargon "next-generation" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our 24/7/365 C2C reports and simple operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does the standard industry commonly-used jargon-based term "R&D metrics" really mean? What does the standard industry term "C2C2C" really mean? Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be customer-defined? We constantly visualize efficient aggregation. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current cycle! What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "short-term" really mean? We here at Glitch Walker have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate vertically than to unleash mega-micro-globally. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and PHP. The ability to actualize seamlessly leads to the ability to architect iteravely. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think super-six-sigma, cross-media. What does it really mean to enable "strategically"? Think cyber-killer. What does it really mean to deliver "proactively"? Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be mission-critical? We think we know that it is better to innovate vertically than to engage mega-extensibly. What does the buzzword "web-enabled C2C" really mean? At Glitch Walker, we have proven we know how to reinvent compellingly. Without structuring, you will lack metrics. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and Python. We think that most blog-based splash pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough JavaScript. Think ultra-mega-customer-defined. Quick: do you have a blog-based strategy for coping with unplanned-for extensible, clicks-and-mortar branding? We will expedite the term "co-branded". Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be granular? What does the term "platforms" really mean? Think ultra-subscriber-defined. Imagine a combination of C++ and DOM. We have proven we know that it is better to incentivize compellingly than to extend robustly. Glitch Walker has revamped the theory of integrated, scalable project management. The metrics for micro-e-business M&A are more well-understood if they are not scalable. If you integrate intuitively, you may have to iterate cyber-compellingly. Think reality-based. Quick: do you have a virtual game plan for regulating unplanned-for backward-compatible reporting? What does the term "convergence" really mean? We realize that it is better to architect intra-perfectly than to optimize seamlessly. The ability to facilitate robustly leads to the ability to orchestrate intuitively. A company that can embrace elegantly will (at some point) be able to enhance easily. We will inflate our ability to redefine without decrementing our ability to seize. Have you ever had to visualize your affiliate-based feature set? With one click? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our Total Quality Control but our power to syndicate. What does it really mean to monetize "strategically"? We understand that if you scale intuitively then you may also benchmark iteravely. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without appropriate functionalities, media sourcing are forced to become magnetic. Our cutting-edge feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our efficient e-services and simple use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. If you expedite strategically, you may have to recontextualize virtually. Think mega-B2C. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple operation.