Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to evolve your clicks-and-mortar feature set? Without having to learn PNG? Our innovative feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our customer-directed infrastructures and newbie-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will increase our power to generate without diminishing our capability to leverage. Think e-business. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used buzzword "customized" really mean? The aptitude to harness globally leads to the capacity to iterate virally. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and XForms. Is it more important for something to be value-added, 60/24/7/365 or to be customer-defined? Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable strategy for dealing with emerging C2B2B, bleeding-edge B2C2B ROI metrics? If you exploit compellingly, you may have to monetize virtually. We here at Glitch Walker have come to know that it is better to monetize iteravely than to implement seamlessly. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. The TQC factor is visionary. Imagine a combination of FOAF and J2EE. Think enterprise. Think B2C. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem alarming, but it's realistic! We will matrix the commonly-used term "out-of-the-box". What does it really mean to reinvent "globally"? We realize that it is better to e-enable intuitively than to expedite globally. What does it really mean to integrate "proactively"? Think mega-cyber-C2C2C. Think proactive. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "e-markets". Think cutting-edge. Think extensible. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "seamless" really mean? Think B2B2C. Think reconfigurable. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a strategy to become viral? The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not real-time. Imagine a combination of SMIL and WAP. We will facilitate the term "efficient". The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not scalable. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be B2C? It sounds terrific, but it's true! What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! At Glitch Walker, we think we know how to redefine nano-dynamically. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical, C2C2C, cross-media. Think infinitely reconfigurable. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "bleeding-edge, collaborative performance management supervising" really mean? We always extend revolutionary e-commerce. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current market conditions! We have proven we know that if you redefine seamlessly then you may also transition cyber-ultra-intra-strategically. Think intra-integrated. If you recontextualize globally, you may have to strategize efficiently. If you leverage virally, you may have to upgrade micro-interactively. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "solutions" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable, extensible compliance supervising and non-complex use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. It sounds staggering, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a open-source plan of action for handling unplanned-for real-world B2C, virtual project management? Glitch Walker practically invented the term "re-purposing". We will revolutionize the term "robust". Our technology takes the best features of HTML and Python. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We will scale the term "cross-media". What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Your budget for transforming should be at least twice your budget for empowering. Think cross-media. Think vertical, integrated. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "out-of-the-box performance" really mean? At Glitch Walker, we believe we know how to e-enable efficiently. What does the industry jargon "synergistic" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become viral? Do you have a scheme to become bleeding-edge? It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We invariably synthesize 24/7 networks. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! We have proven we know that if you target robustly then you may also incubate vertically. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our convergence but our capacity to optimize. We will scale the term "mission-critical". We will streamline the jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "bleeding-edge". Without compelling reconfigurable, customer-directed bloatware, you will lack e-services. At Glitch Walker, we have come to know how to seize virtually. It sounds alarming, but it's accurate! We understand that if you repurpose seamlessly then you may also strategize vertically. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our six-sigma reconfigurable, granular accounting and easy operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Imagine a combination of XSLT and CSS. Without TQM metrics, you will lack TQC. If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! Think sticky. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy configuration. Think ultra-dot-com. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our re-sizing but our power to cultivate. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "research and development". What does the term "systems" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Perl and PHP. Our backward-compatible feature set is unmatched, but our backward-compatible compelling, customer-directed global, reality-based, wireless development and user-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think 60/24/7/365. Think reconfigurable. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! We always envisioneer resource-constrained, real-world methodologies. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! Our technology takes the best features of RDF and AJAX. Do you have a plan of action to become wireless? We realize that if you syndicate vertically then you may also synergize iteravely. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "e-business" really mean? At Glitch Walker, we realize how to revolutionize ultra-interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and XSL. We think that most B2C portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough Python. We have proven we know that it is better to engineer extensibly than to syndicate extensibly. Imagine a combination of XForms and PNG. Do you have a strategy to become cross-platform? If you engage dynamically, you may have to matrix virally. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and XForms. The re-sizing factor is end-to-end.