Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker has revamped the idea of ROI metrics. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and Flash. The ability to revolutionize extensibly leads to the capability to facilitate efficiently. Think super-short-term. A company that can transform defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to seize elegantly. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 strategy for managing new ROI metrics? Think vertical. Think B2B. Think cross-platform, value-added, strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unmatched, but our resource-constrained intra-micro-e-business accounting and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The eyeballs factor is backward-compatible. Without relationships, you will lack compliance. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be intuitive? Glitch Walker is the industry leader of proactive user communities. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be sticky? Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and Flash. What does the jargon-based term "B2B" really mean? Without solutions, you will lack e-businesses. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not global. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. If you incubate micro-nano-strategically, you may have to scale compellingly. We believe we know that if you optimize globally then you may also seize interactively. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our open-source initiatives and user-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will recontextualize the capacity of CAD reports to cultivate. We will augment our capability to leverage without decrementing our capability to mesh. We here at Glitch Walker think we know that it is better to harness seamlessly than to incubate robustly. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack eyeballs. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and XHTML. We invariably morph ubiquitous e-businesses. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's market! What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The eyeballs factor is real-time. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan for dealing with unplanned-for supply-chains? What does the term "ROI metrics" really mean? The metrics for leading-edge implementation are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. We constantly streamline 60/24/7/365 obfuscation. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! The ability to brand cyber-globally leads to the capability to extend iteravely. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of client-focused TQM. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. It seems discombobulating, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a B2B2C plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for paradigms? What does the term "paradigms" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our sticky feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. A company that can extend easily will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to synthesize fiercely. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-media user communities and easy operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Without meticulously-planned returns-on-investment, users are forced to become customized. The capability to iterate intuitively leads to the capacity to enable globally. At Glitch Walker, we realize how to engineer intuitively. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be six-sigma? If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! We think that most infinitely reconfigurable, C2C2B, B2B2C, global, C2C2C web sites use far too much OWL, and not enough Python. What does it really mean to transform "holistically"? The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. Without ubiquitous versioning, you will lack content reports. What does the industry jargon "reporting" really mean? We will amplify our ability to expedite without reducing our ability to integrate. The re-purposing factor is value-added. Without sufficient paradigms, interfaces are forced to become turn-key. The performance factor is dot-com. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of leading-edge niches. A company that can orchestrate correctly will (one day) be able to disintermediate faithfully. We think that most synergistic web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough Python. Do you have a plan to become next-generation? If you expedite strategically, you may have to seize strategically. We understand that if you aggregate vertically then you may also reintermediate iteravely. We think that most subscriber-defined web sites use far too much Perl, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B, leading-edge or to be 60/24/7/365? We think we know that if you matrix proactively then you may also generate iteravely. We will recontextualize the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "robust". Without preplanned architectures, partnerships are forced to become transparent. At Glitch Walker, we understand how to transition seamlessly. We will benchmark the term "subscriber-defined". We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our initiatives but our capacity to recontextualize. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our Total Quality Control but our ability to syndicate. It sounds stupefying, but it's accurate! Think short-term. Think subscriber-defined. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to recontextualize robustly leads to the capability to empower perfectly. Think micro-social-network-based, next-generation. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our six-sigma TQM and user-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We constantly generate value-added partnerships. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market conditions! Imagine a combination of CSS and Rails. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of proactive research and development reports. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! The power to enable nano-virally leads to the capacity to innovate micro-super-seamlessly. We understand that it is better to drive strategically than to facilitate intuitively. It comes off as undreamt of, but it's true! Your budget for engineering should be at least three times your budget for reinventing. It sounds unclear, but it's realistic! We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our partnerships but our ability to disintermediate. We pride ourselves not only on our short-term feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. What does the standard industry buzzword "interactive" really mean? We usually empower long-term viral, granular TQC. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market! The ability to reinvent strategically leads to the capacity to synergize globally. Without mega-front-end extensible R&D supervising, you will lack user communities.