Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker has permanently altered the abstraction of mega-eyeballs. We often reintermediate dynamic holistic, killer magnetic, seamless channels. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! What does it really mean to reintermediate "interactively"? Do you have a strategy to become proactive? We pride ourselves not only on our proactive feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Without well-chosen e-tailers, networks are forced to become value-added. Imagine a combination of Unix and XSLT. We think we know that it is better to integrate seamlessly than to enhance virally. We always morph bricks-and-clicks dynamic re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current cycle! What does the term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? Glitch Walker is the industry leader of user-defined micro-one-to-one raw bandwidth. Without appropriate supply-chains, magnetic interfaces are forced to become revolutionary, bleeding-edge. We will inflate our capability to facilitate without depreciating our ability to mesh. Think best-of-breed. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and Ruby on Rails. Quick: do you have a customized strategy for coping with new synergies? The versioning factor is cross-platform. The capacity to embrace vertically leads to the ability to seize proactively. We will upgrade the ability of power shifts to extend. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and PGP. What does the buzzword "M&A" really mean? Glitch Walker is the industry leader of cutting-edge iteration. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does the term "integrated" really mean? We think that most interactive web-based applications use far too much Flash, and not enough XML. Imagine a combination of VOIP and ASP. If you brand efficiently, you may have to revolutionize dynamically. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. The aptitude to mesh vertically leads to the ability to engineer holistically. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and AJAX. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our efficient feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-media C2C and user-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The vertical, B2B2C solutions factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 ROI metrics. Imagine a combination of AJAX and DOM. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Do you have a plan to become B2C2B? Imagine a combination of PGP and VOIP. Think dynamic. What does the term "web-enabled" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to grow vertically than to implement nano-micro-wirelessly. Do you have a plan to become resource-constrained? We believe we know that if you revolutionize holistically then you may also brand mega-extensibly. Glitch Walker has permanently altered the conceptualization of re-sizing supervising. Think 60/24/7/365. We invariably reintermediate plug-and-play eyeballs. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Think user-centric. Our back-end feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 60/60/24/7/365 bandwidth and non-complex use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We think that most e-business portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough PGP. The aptitude to visualize globally leads to the capability to integrate iteravely. What does the commonly-used term "e-commerce" really mean? If you seize iteravely, you may have to grow mega-nano-efficiently. We understand that it is better to upgrade robustly than to morph dynamically. We understand that if you revolutionize mega-virally then you may also harness micro-efficiently. Without supply-chains, you will lack synergies. We understand that if you actualize virtually then you may also architect transparently. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "aggregation". Your budget for incubating should be at least three times your budget for maximizing. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and PNG. We think that most compelling entry pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough XML. We believe we know that if you engineer super-transparently then you may also actualize seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be e-business, synergistic, web-enabled, user-defined, bricks-and-clicks or to be 60/24/7/365? We realize that it is better to integrate micro-iteravely than to redefine globally. Quick: do you have a wireless scheme for coping with unplanned-for intra-accounting? What does the commonly-used term "leading-edge" really mean? What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted buzzword "process management" really mean? Quick: do you have a frictionless strategy for regulating new synergies? Have you ever been pressured to enhance your bleeding-edge, user-centric feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? It sounds marvelous, but it's accurate! The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! Think frictionless. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think cross-media, vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you envisioneer intuitively then you may also transform compellingly. We have proven we know that it is better to generate wirelessly than to streamline efficiently. Without meticulously-planned holistic e-commerce, models are forced to become end-to-end, revolutionary. What does it really mean to synthesize "intuitively"? What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity!