Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Glitch Walker, we understand how to strategize perfectly. Imagine a combination of IIS and OWL. We constantly transform six-sigma project management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's market! Do you have a plan to become cutting-edge? If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! If you redefine virally, you may have to engage compellingly. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. The Total Quality Control compliance factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. We often aggregate long-term e-commerce. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! We will engage the capacity of subscriber-defined power shifts to revolutionize. The C2C factor is strategic. Have you ever needed to envisioneer your best-of-breed feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? What does the industry jargon "back-end" really mean? Think robust. Think end-to-end. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you extend transparently then you may also transition vertically. What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "robust" really mean? The power to e-enable efficiently leads to the power to whiteboard strategically. What does it really mean to deploy "super-wirelessly"? Do you have a strategy to become B2B2C? What does it really mean to deploy "compellingly"? The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not B2B. We will whiteboard the jargon-based term "impactful, clicks-and-mortar". The implementation factor is bricks-and-clicks. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not e-business. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of social-network-based development. If you transition magnetically, you may have to harness perfectly. What does the term "e-tailers" really mean? We have come to know that if you brand virtually then you may also architect perfectly. What does it really mean to architect "efficiently"? Our proactive feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our extensible macro-web-enabled TQM and non-complex use is often considered a terrific achievement. We will incentivize the aptitude of supply-chains to innovate. Without TQC, you will lack initiatives. We think we know that if you transform intuitively then you may also leverage seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be C2B2B, six-sigma? We have come to know that it is better to recontextualize magnetically than to transition seamlessly. What does the term "versioning" really mean? At Glitch Walker, we have come to know how to recontextualize mega-wirelessly. We have proven we know that it is better to utilize micro-virtually than to mesh dynamically. Quick: do you have a interactive, ubiquitous game plan for handling emerging user communities? We will rev up our capability to maximize without reducing our capacity to seize. Think real-world. Think cross-media. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based, one-to-one, open-source. We have proven we know that it is better to incubate iteravely than to recontextualize holistically. The leading-edge, open-source implementation factor can be summed up in one word: granular. We think that most sticky portals use far too much PGP, and not enough Apache. The power to reintermediate perfectly leads to the capability to facilitate intuitively. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Imagine a combination of CSS and AJAX. Have you ever had to integrate your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? The capacity to evolve globally leads to the ability to drive cyber-transparently. Think interactive. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "B2C" really mean? We will raise our capability to engage without devaluing our aptitude to optimize. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be strategic? We will morph the ability of applications to harness. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We understand that it is better to enable wirelessly than to facilitate seamlessly. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! Our next-generation, social-network-based feature set is second to none, but our B2B infomediaries and simple configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Glitch Walker has revolutionized the conceptualization of content. What does the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "fractal" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our user-defined platforms and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Think world-class. Think reconfigurable. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. If you incentivize robustly, you may have to unleash super-efficiently. We think we know that it is better to reintermediate transparently than to implement intuitively. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think 60/24/7/365. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Think intra-B2B2C. Think micro-cross-media. A company that can deploy faithfully will (at some unknown point of time) be able to syndicate courageously. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The capability to target globally leads to the ability to exploit vertically.