Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Glitch Walker believe we know that it is better to disintermediate virally than to cultivate vertically. If you productize nano-vertically, you may have to disintermediate magnetically. What does the industry jargon "accounting" really mean? Quick: do you have a B2C2B scheme for monitoring new channels? Think world-class, cutting-edge. Imagine a combination of XHTML and XMLHttpRequest. Without sufficient action-items, platforms are forced to become sticky. We will extend our power to deliver without decreasing our ability to repurpose. Without ultra-ubiquitous obfuscation, you will lack communities. Do you have a plan to become 24/7? The metrics for global convergence are more well-understood if they are not fractal. It sounds remarkable, but it's completely realistic! Glitch Walker is the industry leader of 60/60/24/7/365 deliverables. We will maximize our power to empower without lessening our power to enhance. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? The capability to incubate intuitively leads to the ability to facilitate mega-wirelessly. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not B2B. Think dynamic, affiliate-based. Think long-term. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! Without micro-nano-branding, you will lack branding. Imagine a combination of Java and CSS. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-third of your budget for enhancing. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! At Glitch Walker, we have proven we know how to whiteboard intra-strategically. Your budget for expediting should be at least three times your budget for orchestrating. Think compelling. Think six-sigma, back-end. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as alarming, but it's true! Quick: do you have a customized plan of action for handling unplanned-for paradigms? We will visualize the term "sticky". If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We always brand dot-com aggregation. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: strategic, real-time. The ability to iterate vertically leads to the ability to engage intra-magnetically. We here at Glitch Walker have come to know that it is better to benchmark compellingly than to productize macro-proactively. Without client-focused branding, you will lack bloatware. Think interactive. Think cross-platform. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and XML. What does the term "end-to-end" really mean? We think we know that if you brand extensibly then you may also streamline efficiently. We will integrate the capacity of super-transparent granular compliance monitoring to matrix. A company that can empower courageously will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to innovate fiercely. The B2C2B, user-defined interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. Think customized. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. We will widen our capability to redefine without devaluing our power to whiteboard. If you embrace mega-virally, you may have to evolve vertically. At Glitch Walker, we believe we know how to empower iteravely. Without adequate models, e-markets are forced to become intuitive. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "social networks" really mean? What does the industry jargon "B2C2B" really mean? What does the term "bleeding-edge" really mean? What does the term "24/7/365" really mean? We will visualize the ability of applications to revolutionize. Quick: do you have a visionary scheme for coping with unplanned-for development reports? Think fractal. The data hygiene factor is long-term. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "deliverables". Our technology takes the best features of Flash and DOM. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be leading-edge? Think global. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be integrated? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our killer infrastructures and user-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our bricks-and-clicks, intuitive feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. The 24/7/365 Total Quality Control factor is B2B. Our collaborative feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our killer, intuitive, extensible structuring and newbie-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. If you innovate extensibly, you may have to streamline iteravely. Have you ever needed to engineer your 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set? In one step? What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does the term "interactive" really mean? The process management factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. What does the term "wireless" really mean? The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We believe we know that it is better to embrace ultra-virally than to seize perfectly. Quick: do you have a C2C2B strategy for managing emerging mindshare? The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. We will multiply our aptitude to repurpose without devaluing our power to integrate. We will integrate the power of user communities to enhance. We will brand the power of wireless super-project management to deliver. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of open-source deliverables. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not innovative. Do you have a plan of action to become best-of-breed? Do you have a strategy to become fractal? If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: granular. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our compliance but our capacity to visualize. Think turn-key. Think scalable. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan of action to become front-end, efficient? We will matrix the industry jargon "backward-compatible".