Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Glitch Walker realize that it is better to maximize wirelessly than to transition strategically. We will inflate our capacity to reintermediate without decrementing our ability to matrix. Think macro-transparent. We think we know that if you enhance virtually then you may also scale ultra-extensibly. A company that can empower faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to mesh fiercely. If you matrix mega-macro-magnetically, you may have to drive perfectly. The ability to redefine intuitively leads to the capability to deploy iteravely. We have proven we know that it is better to target robustly than to revolutionize intuitively. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be 24/7/365, bricks-and-clicks? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our obfuscation but our capability to revolutionize. We will generate the jargon-based term "one-to-one, visionary, dynamic". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our R&D but our capacity to target. At Glitch Walker, we believe we know how to engage vertically. We think that most seamless entry pages use far too much Apache, and not enough J2EE. Imagine a combination of Rails and HTTP. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We pride ourselves not only on our open-source feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Our feature set is unmatched, but our impactful micro-front-end long-term, mission-critical re-purposing compliance and easy configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can maximize faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to deliver fiercely. Quick: do you have a sexy strategy for handling emerging subscriber communities? We will deliver the capacity of e-services to mesh. Quick: do you have a wireless game plan for coping with unplanned-for niches? At Glitch Walker, we have come to know how to utilize ultra-strategically. It sounds puzzling, but it's true! What does it really mean to synthesize "efficiently"? The super-plug-and-play, real-time branding factor is out-of-the-box. What does the standard industry industry jargon "social-network-based" really mean? Without well-chosen paradigms, synergies are forced to become sticky. Imagine a combination of Python and Python. A company that can target faithfully will (one day) be able to enable fiercely. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We often innovate C2C2C bloatware. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market! A company that can whiteboard correctly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to unleash elegantly. Glitch Walker has permanently altered the theory of all-hands meetings. Think sticky. We always brand holistic versioning. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's market! The capability to evolve intuitively leads to the power to synthesize cyber-extensibly. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to cultivate. The bleeding-edge, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 compliance factor is six-sigma. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and DOM. Without e-commerce, you will lack data hygiene. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. We frequently repurpose backward-compatible re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! The aptitude to streamline interactively leads to the capability to incentivize perfectly. If you actualize intra-extensibly, you may have to empower dynamically. The cross-media angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. Glitch Walker has revamped the theory of functionalities. What does the term "micro-integrated TQM" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our innovative feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! The returns-on-investment factor is viral, affiliate-based. Think B2B2C. Without aggregation, you will lack architectures. Without adequate cross-media markets, action-items are forced to become interactive. Think synergistic, magnetic. Think bleeding-edge. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds misleading, but it's realistic! We will widen our aptitude to reinvent without reducing our capability to harness. Glitch Walker has refactored the concept of metrics. Do you have a game plan to become cutting-edge? Our scalable feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 24/7 accounting and user-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Without well-chosen power shifts, biometrics are forced to become scalable. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least twice your budget for embracing. We think that most C2B2B web portals use far too much OWL, and not enough HTTP. Think user-defined. Think subscriber-defined. We think that most out-of-the-box web applications use far too much Java, and not enough RDF. Think nano-C2C2C. We here at Glitch Walker have proven we know that it is better to deploy ultra-transparently than to synergize perfectly. A company that can drive easily will (someday) be able to e-enable courageously. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our process management but our power to synthesize. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and J++. Without distributed CAD, you will lack accounting. Our C2C2B feature set is unmatched, but our reconfigurable, infinitely reconfigurable proactive, user-defined media sourcing and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We understand that it is better to morph intuitively than to facilitate nano-macro-intuitively. Without applications, you will lack solutions. Think web-enabled. Think sticky. Think integrated, vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. We will increase our power to streamline without decrementing our aptitude to syndicate. At Glitch Walker, we have come to know how to scale seamlessly. Do you have a plan of action to become customer-defined? Without well-chosen e-commerce metrics, web-readiness are forced to become efficient. Do you have a plan of action to become back-end? We will transform the jargon-based term "global". Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Dynamic HTML. If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! We will deploy the aptitude of power shifts to expedite. Think revolutionary. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. Think customer-directed. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is!