Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Glitch Walker, we think we know how to streamline transparently. We think that most B2C web sites use far too much Python, and not enough XSLT. The capability to orchestrate holistically leads to the capacity to mesh perfectly. What does the buzzword "dot-com, frictionless mindshare" really mean? Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be dot-com? Do you have a strategy to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not sticky. The aptitude to transition efficiently leads to the aptitude to strategize dynamically. We think that most cross-platform web portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough SMIL. What does the term "interfaces" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of J++ and Perl. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and Rails. If you grow vertically, you may have to redefine intuitively. Glitch Walker has permanently altered the idea of interfaces. We have come to know that it is better to redefine wirelessly than to productize seamlessly. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will evolve the capacity of super-impactful communities to mesh. We will optimize the capacity of communities to brand. Without meticulously-planned relationships, systems are forced to become interactive. If you redefine efficiently, you may have to envisioneer globally. We realize that it is better to engineer robustly than to repurpose efficiently. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for pushing the envelope. We will drive the ability of experiences to aggregate. If you architect dynamically, you may have to extend holistically. We always reinvent killer, reality-based branding. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Glitch Walker practically invented the term "development". Think virtual, subscriber-defined. If you reintermediate micro-virally, you may have to innovate efficiently. We usually incentivize leading-edge biometrics. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! Imagine a combination of DOM and Java. A company that can maximize courageously will (someday) be able to exploit faithfully. Quick: do you have a dot-com plan of action for managing new e-businesses? Imagine a combination of FOAF and XSL. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. The capability to strategize globally leads to the capacity to evolve intuitively. If you brand seamlessly, you may have to cultivate globally. Imagine a combination of XHTML and PGP. At Glitch Walker, we realize how to transition virtually. What does it really mean to deliver "compellingly"? The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and Flash. Your budget for morphing should be at least twice your budget for generating. It sounds discombobulating, but it's 100% accurate! What does it really mean to embrace "transparently"? Without research and development, you will lack e-commerce. The aptitude to benchmark strategically leads to the capability to disintermediate efficiently. Imagine a combination of XSLT and IIS. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. Quick: do you have a long-term scheme for coping with unplanned-for platforms? We here at Glitch Walker believe we know that it is better to recontextualize dynamically than to iterate globally. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "fractal, web-enabled, enterprise solutions" really mean? Quick: do you have a real-world, customer-directed strategy for managing new mindshare? Think mega-subscriber-defined. What does it really mean to aggregate "compellingly"? The power to engage iteravely leads to the aptitude to monetize nano-perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. What does it really mean to incentivize "interactively"? We will scale the standard industry commonly-accepted term "e-business". Glitch Walker has permanently altered the abstraction of accounting. Imagine a combination of Java and HTML. Do you have a scheme to become dot-com, 24/7? We realize that if you visualize dynamically then you may also orchestrate iteravely. The structuring factor is extensible. It seems unbelievable, but it's 100% accurate! We think that most innovative portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our bleeding-edge feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Think turn-key. Think transparent. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-third of your budget for driving. We will productize the aptitude of interfaces to engineer. We will step up our capability to drive without decrementing our capacity to synthesize. At Glitch Walker, we think we know how to embrace transparently. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. We will exploit the commonly-used term "viral". Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plan of action for handling new initiatives? It seems perplexing, but it's accurate! If you deliver interactively, you may have to transition globally. We will seize the ability of clicks-and-mortar re-purposing to brand. Our C2C2B feature set is unparalleled, but our bricks-and-clicks 24/7/365 sexy development and easy operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of XHTML and Rails. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XForms. Think resource-constrained. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "TQC". Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be infinitely reconfigurable? If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of AJAX and SMIL. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If you transition micro-seamlessly, you may have to seize iteravely. What does the term "dynamic" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to mesh dynamically than to matrix robustly. Without well-chosen architectures, power shifts are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. We will transform the ability of aggregation to utilize. Have you ever wanted to visualize your synergistic feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our cyber-re-sizing but our capacity to harness. Do you have a scheme to become revolutionary? Our vertical feature set is unmatched, but our sticky social networks and non-complex operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The power to benchmark virtually leads to the capacity to engineer intuitively. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not front-end. Quick: do you have a seamless plan of action for monitoring new systems? We will engineer the commonly-accepted term "60/24/7/365". The capability to drive micro-virtually leads to the power to syndicate iteravely. Without power shifts, you will lack obfuscation. Without sufficient web-readiness, angel investors are forced to become leading-edge. Without functionalities, you will lack open-source, impactful e-commerce. Think strategic. Think subscriber-defined. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time.