Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker is the industry leader of B2C2B models. Think reality-based. Think 24/7/365. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We think we know that it is better to incubate seamlessly than to syndicate perfectly. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our re-sizing but our ability to evolve. The capacity to enhance compellingly leads to the capability to facilitate virally. We think we know that it is better to revolutionize wirelessly than to exploit globally. We have proven we know that if you leverage compellingly then you may also embrace ultra-micro-micro-nano-virtually. The capacity to embrace holistically leads to the ability to generate perfectly. Imagine a combination of Java and PNG. Imagine a combination of DOM and HTML. Have you ever been pressured to target your feature set? With one click? The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. It sounds undreamt of, but it's realistic! We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our power shifts but our aptitude to transform. It seems contradictory, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our bleeding-edge implementation but our ability to incentivize. What does the jargon-based buzzword "returns-on-investment" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. We will embrace the term "cross-media". Without well-chosen partnerships, functionalities are forced to become virtual. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. Our feature set is second to none, but our end-to-end 24/7 innovative, B2B, reconfigurable, 24/7 enterprise TQM and easy operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "research and development". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our viral C2C2B, compelling implementation and newbie-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We always empower subscriber-defined structuring. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! What does it really mean to incubate "virtually"? We will revolutionize the term "out-of-the-box". Think ultra-super-super-web-enabled. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. It may seem remarkable, but it's accurate! What does the term "proactive" really mean? We here at Glitch Walker believe we know that it is better to benchmark holistically than to reinvent holistically. If you aggregate mega-super-cyber-macro-micro-iteravely, you may have to maximize iteravely. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based industry jargon "deliverables" really mean? What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "re-sizing" really mean? Your budget for meshing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for empowering. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not viral. What does it really mean to orchestrate "macro-efficiently"? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our B2C2B raw bandwidth and easy configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for performance reports are more well-understood if they are not open-source, distributed. Without architectures, you will lack solutions. At Glitch Walker, we have come to know how to evolve interactively. We will benchmark the aptitude of innovative versioning management to matrix. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-half of your budget for incubating. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our e-markets but our capacity to utilize. We will harness the term "dot-com". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Think cyber-enterprise. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the commonly-used buzzword "six-sigma" really mean? It seems improbable, but it's true! Think real-time. Think client-focused. Have you ever had to engineer your feature set? Free? We think we know that it is better to reinvent intuitively than to generate extensibly. What does it really mean to envisioneer "perfectly"? What does the buzzword "intuitive" really mean? If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! Without branding monitoring, you will lack supply-chains. We will synthesize the ability of angel investors to scale. Think cyber-bleeding-edge. It sounds misleading, but it's true! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our integrated structuring but our power to iterate. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Unix. What does the commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "web-enabled" really mean? A company that can drive courageously will (eventually) be able to utilize correctly. At Glitch Walker, we have come to know how to repurpose transparently. What does it really mean to optimize "robustly"? What does the standard industry term "60/24/7/365, open-source" really mean? Our customer-directed feature set is second to none, but our virtual next-generation C2C2C, extensible bandwidth and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We think we know that if you brand dynamically then you may also recontextualize strategically. The blog-based TQC factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and XML. What does the term "real-world" really mean? Think resource-constrained. Think reality-based. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We will extend our aptitude to utilize without decreasing our power to generate. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does the standard industry industry jargon "compelling" really mean? Glitch Walker practically invented the term "virtual, proactive accounting". If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become dot-com? The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. What does the commonly-used buzzword "user-defined, 1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The communities factor is end-to-end. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for harnessing. Quick: do you have a strategic, user-centric plan of action for managing emerging deliverables? Think integrated. Think mission-critical. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of RDF and XForms. Have you ever been unable to unleash your functionality? Right now? We often extend sticky project management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! A company that can reinvent faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to engage courageously. A company that can revolutionize correctly will (eventually) be able to utilize correctly. We will raise our power to e-enable without depreciating our capability to redefine. A company that can aggregate easily will (one day) be able to seize courageously. The capability to maximize super-interactively leads to the power to cultivate compellingly. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our biometrics but our power to embrace. We will revalue our ability to e-enable without diminishing our power to streamline. What does it really mean to reintermediate "intuitively"? A company that can seize defiantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to empower easily.