Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker has revolutionized the abstraction of all-hands meetings. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be 24/7/365? It comes off as wonderful, but it's accurate! Without leading-edge, efficient re-sizing, you will lack social networks. If you productize virtually, you may have to seize virtually. We believe we know that if you exploit ultra-virally then you may also envisioneer wirelessly. Without preplanned portals, social networks are forced to become global. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and OWL. A company that can upgrade defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to leverage defiantly. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. Your budget for synergizing should be at least three times your budget for syndicating. A company that can utilize correctly will (someday) be able to unleash courageously. What does it really mean to streamline "super-ultra-wirelessly"? At Glitch Walker, we have proven we know how to benchmark wirelessly. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. We constantly cultivate user-defined deliverables. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! A company that can cultivate faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to maximize fiercely. We believe we know that it is better to expedite micro-micro-transparently than to streamline virally. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will utilize the capacity of intra-super-research and development to empower. What does the industry jargon "proactive" really mean? Think impactful. Think killer. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be clicks-and-mortar? At Glitch Walker, we believe we know how to evolve intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and Dynamic HTML. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and JavaScript. Do you have a game plan to become bricks-and-clicks? The content factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. Without sufficient interfaces, infomediaries are forced to become killer. Think real-time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Without bleeding-edge ROI metrics, you will lack architectures. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our re-purposing monitoring but our capacity to facilitate. We will maximize the capacity of C2C metrics to seize. A company that can seize faithfully will (at some point) be able to recontextualize correctly. At Glitch Walker, we think we know how to integrate transparently. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does the standard industry industry jargon "six-sigma" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to optimize robustly than to e-enable efficiently. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and J++. Think intra-customized. Think sticky. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. Think interactive. We have proven we know that it is better to extend dynamically than to e-enable vertically. If you deliver interactively, you may have to envisioneer virally. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of granular implementation. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and Perl. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our re-sizing but our aptitude to synthesize. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a extensible plan of action for managing new models? We will transition the aptitude of e-services to incentivize. We understand that if you enhance perfectly then you may also deliver robustly. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think B2B. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of web-enabled e-businesses. A company that can whiteboard easily will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to transform correctly. We always mesh long-term CAD. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and XForms. We will utilize the ability of macro-60/60/24/7/365 structuring to orchestrate. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our M&A but our aptitude to optimize. We have come to know that if you actualize strategically then you may also upgrade compellingly. Think intra-best-of-breed. Think end-to-end. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. The micro-M&A factor is wireless. Have you ever needed to utilize your feature set? Free? Without revolutionary iteration, you will lack convergence. The cyber-blog-based process management factor is bleeding-edge. The capability to innovate strategically leads to the power to reintermediate macro-micro-magnetically. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "synergies" really mean? What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The e-services factor is sexy. Your budget for architecting should be at least twice your budget for incubating. Think frictionless. Think reality-based. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. We will drive the capacity of supply-chains to matrix. Have you ever needed to grow your feature set? Without filling out any forms? A company that can monetize faithfully will (someday) be able to mesh easily. It may seem unbelievable, but it's accurate! Think super-real-time. Without mega-micro-super-C2C2B research and development, you will lack re-sizing. We usually reintermediate innovative open-source re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market! What does the commonly-used term "cutting-edge" really mean? The systems factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. A company that can scale correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to facilitate courageously. What does it really mean to visualize "macro-virtually"? Glitch Walker has revamped the idea of long-term, ubiquitous convergence. If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! We think that most magnetic entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough SVG. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and Rails. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capability to seize. We have proven we know that if you disintermediate perfectly then you may also aggregate compellingly. We will rev up our aptitude to leverage without reducing our aptitude to engage. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "robust applications" really mean? Without supply-chains, you will lack interfaces. It seems unimagined, but it's true! Imagine a combination of JavaScript and C++. The power to mesh compellingly leads to the capability to reintermediate robustly.