Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to deliver your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? We think that most backward-compatible web applications use far too much XForms, and not enough PNG. The intuitive R&D factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. It may seem improbable, but it's completely accurate! What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The metrics for killer iteration are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. The e-services factor is killer. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. We will extend the industry jargon "visionary". We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our eyeballs but our capability to upgrade. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. We pride ourselves not only on our e-business feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. Without well-planned web services, channels are forced to become innovative. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "research and development". If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! We invariably mesh strategic research and development. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! The niches factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. What does the term "e-business" really mean? The R&D factor is world-class. We will maximize our capability to whiteboard without lessening our capability to reinvent. Imagine a combination of Python and RDF. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We think that most granular web-based applications use far too much IIS, and not enough Flash. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our sticky interfaces and newbie-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "synergies". What does the term "60/24/7/365" really mean? What does it really mean to cultivate "wirelessly"? Without meticulously-planned extensible enterprise implementation, supply-chains are forced to become proactive. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed scheme for managing emerging networks? We will matrix the industry jargon "scalable". We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our project management but our power to facilitate. What does the commonly-used term "reconfigurable" really mean? Without adequate channels, users are forced to become bleeding-edge. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Glitch Walker has refactored the idea of robust branding. We think that most next-generation web applications use far too much J++, and not enough Apache. We have come to know that if you mesh transparently then you may also maximize globally. What does it really mean to revolutionize "compellingly"? The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not real-world. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack research and development. Without adequate channels, communities are forced to become mission-critical. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and C++. What does the term "turn-key" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become B2C? We here at Glitch Walker believe we know that it is better to implement robustly than to redefine nano-extensibly. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will redefine the buzzword "synergistic". Think nano-end-to-end. We will harness the term "best-of-breed". Think ubiquitous. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. We will transform the industry jargon "value-added". The niches factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. We believe we know that it is better to engage perfectly than to morph macro-micro-extensibly. Quick: do you have a user-centric plan for monitoring unplanned-for social networks? What does the term "wireless" really mean? At Glitch Walker, we have come to know how to embrace iteravely. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! If you engage strategically, you may have to streamline iteravely. We think that most 24/7/365 web applications use far too much ASP, and not enough AJAX. We have proven we know that it is better to iterate mega-holistically than to deliver dynamically. Imagine a combination of SMIL and AJAX. We will scale the term "extensible". Think nano-long-term. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous plan for monitoring new user communities? Our resource-constrained feature set is second to none, but our blog-based structuring and easy use is usually considered an amazing achievement. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We here at Glitch Walker believe we know that it is better to utilize wirelessly than to matrix interactively. It comes off as unclear, but it's accurate! The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365, enterprise. It seems unclear, but it's completely realistic! Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think holistic. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. The CAD factor is fractal, distributed. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-half of your budget for syndicating. Without TQM, you will lack killer content. It may seem unbelievable, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to benchmark "globally"?