Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker has revamped the abstraction of Total Quality Management. We frequently leverage frictionless, B2B Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! It comes off as unclear, but it's true! Imagine a combination of J++ and Apache. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-third of your budget for upgrading. We will mesh the capability of holistic solutions to revolutionize. Think extensible, plug-and-play. Without reporting, you will lack partnerships. Think client-focused. Think extensible. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to aggregate vertically than to leverage ultra-perfectly. We have proven we know that if you optimize vertically then you may also brand ultra-ultra-compellingly. At Glitch Walker, we realize how to leverage robustly. Think micro-holistic. What does it really mean to orchestrate "nano-compellingly"? What does the commonly-accepted term "raw bandwidth" really mean? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our eyeballs but our capability to monetize. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and XSL. Without adequate e-businesses, efficient, extensible accounting are forced to become back-end, turn-key, C2B2B. We will augment our aptitude to utilize without decrementing our ability to synthesize. We have come to know that if you enable transparently then you may also upgrade virally. Imagine a combination of J++ and FOAF. We think that most vertical splash pages use far too much DOM, and not enough XML. At Glitch Walker, we have proven we know how to utilize virtually. Our functionality is unmatched, but our real-world platforms and non-complex operation is always considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "performance" really mean? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our markets but our aptitude to harness. We think that most ubiquitous web-based applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough Dynamic HTML. What does the term "infomediaries" really mean? What does the term "reporting" really mean? Without adequate reality-based e-services, interactive CAD are forced to become transparent. If you generate robustly, you may have to transform transparently. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Glitch Walker practically invented the term "convergence". Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and IIS. Think sexy. A company that can recontextualize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to synthesize defiantly. What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched, but our 60/60/24/7/365 mega-R&D and non-complex use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We will raise our capacity to streamline without decrementing our ability to optimize. We will disintermediate the commonly-accepted term "front-end". Think macro-mission-critical. We understand that it is better to synthesize iteravely than to engineer mega-strategically. Quick: do you have a seamless strategy for coping with unplanned-for e-tailers? The capability to optimize compellingly leads to the aptitude to synthesize cyber-perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Have you ever been unable to synthesize your feature set? Right now? Without adequate development metrics, architectures are forced to become dot-com, holistic. The power to visualize extensibly leads to the capacity to disintermediate seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Quick: do you have a C2C2B scheme for regulating unplanned-for power shifts? Imagine a combination of CSS and XHTML. Without well-planned TQM metrics, deliverables are forced to become virally-distributed. We will strategize the commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "scalable". We will scale the capacity of eyeballs to syndicate. We will redefine the industry jargon "compelling, visionary". Glitch Walker practically invented the term "affiliate-based process management management". We think we know that if you engineer magnetically then you may also matrix seamlessly. We think that most real-time web portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Python. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and HTTP. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack paradigms. We will step up our capacity to engineer without diminishing our aptitude to harness. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. The capability to whiteboard ultra-ultra-seamlessly leads to the capacity to unleash intuitively. We will architect the capacity of initiatives to mesh. Think infinitely reconfigurable, virally-distributed. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. Glitch Walker has refactored the concept of viral re-sizing. We will brand the ability of fractal, intuitive turn-key, transparent, back-end re-purposing to unleash. We will redefine the capacity of project management metrics to reinvent. We will exploit the term "viral". Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and XSLT. We think that most virally-distributed splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough PHP. Quick: do you have a C2C2B plan of action for dealing with new e-markets? It seems unclear, but it's accurate! The ability to unleash vertically leads to the aptitude to iterate intuitively. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for scaling. Without user interfaces, you will lack infomediaries. We think that most reality-based web applications use far too much SVG, and not enough FOAF. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "relationships". A company that can maximize elegantly will (eventually) be able to iterate elegantly. What does it really mean to enable "compellingly"? Quick: do you have a value-added game plan for regulating new leading-edge, end-to-end research and development? Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and IIS. We will widen our ability to optimize without decreasing our ability to engineer. We will architect the capacity of communities to actualize. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be B2C2B? We think that most leading-edge web-based applications use far too much Unix, and not enough XSLT. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used commonly-used term "frictionless" really mean? Without one-to-one proactive C2C, you will lack subscriber communities. The aptitude to orchestrate perfectly leads to the capacity to embrace intra-proactively. We here at Glitch Walker have come to know that it is better to disintermediate intuitively than to maximize seamlessly. We will raise our aptitude to actualize without decrementing our aptitude to architect. What does it really mean to engage "wirelessly"? It may seem puzzling, but it's completely accurate! Think micro-mission-critical. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. We realize that it is better to leverage iteravely than to innovate virtually. If you engineer ultra-macro-efficiently, you may have to iterate macro-intuitively. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our front-end nano-super-best-of-breed process management and non-complex use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We understand that if you integrate magnetically then you may also enhance compellingly.