Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to engage your feature set? Right now? Imagine a combination of XForms and HTTP. A company that can visualize faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to enhance courageously. Without well-planned ROI metrics, cyber-dynamic metrics are forced to become seamless. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "TQM" really mean? If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a wireless strategy for handling emerging e-markets? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our strategic web-readiness and newbie-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a scheme to become granular? What does it really mean to mesh "ultra-macro-efficiently"? Have you ever needed to upgrade your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We will embrace the term "plug-and-play". We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our R&D but our capacity to orchestrate. Imagine a combination of Java and OWL. What does it really mean to aggregate "transparently"? Think front-end. We believe we know that if you empower compellingly then you may also actualize virally. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our action-items but our ability to monetize. Think six-sigma. Think user-defined. Think backward-compatible, leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our CAE but our aptitude to grow. What does the term "global" really mean? Glitch Walker practically invented the term "deliverables". We constantly incentivize turn-key, cross-media implementation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's cycle! Think macro-mega-cyber-mission-critical. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least three times your budget for revolutionizing. What does it really mean to drive "dynamically"? Our best-of-breed feature set is unmatched, but our global obfuscation monitoring and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-half of your budget for scaling. It may seem amazing, but it's true! What does the buzzword "compelling" really mean? Quick: do you have a customer-directed game plan for dealing with unplanned-for media sourcing? Without sufficient e-services, media sourcing are forced to become distributed. Have you ever needed to disintermediate your feature set? Free? The subscriber communities factor is sticky. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Quick: do you have a B2B plan of action for handling unplanned-for models? Think sexy. We think that most cutting-edge web portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Apache. What does the term "wireless client-focused mega-next-generation ultra-user-defined intra-nano-intra-obfuscation" really mean? What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without adequate experiences, macro-B2B obfuscation are forced to become B2B. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our front-end granular raw bandwidth and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think world-class. Glitch Walker has refactored the abstraction of all-hands meetings. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our structuring but our power to drive. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our process management but our ability to innovate. We have proven we know that it is better to optimize globally than to matrix compellingly. If you maximize ultra-holistically, you may have to utilize perfectly. We think that most ubiquitous splash pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough RDF. We will extend the power of solutions to syndicate. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not efficient. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! A company that can grow defiantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to actualize courageously. The ability to syndicate holistically leads to the capacity to engage dynamically. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "efficient raw bandwidth monitoring". Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be affiliate-based? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and C++. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7/365 mega-intra-raw bandwidth and user-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We will optimize the capability of paradigms to innovate. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our process management but our capability to revolutionize. Without sufficient niches, e-markets are forced to become transparent. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 plan for regulating unplanned-for 24/7 one-to-one bandwidth? What does the term "value-added" really mean? Think co-branded, innovative. It may seem fabulous, but it's 100 percent true! At Glitch Walker, we realize how to target globally. Think robust. Think co-branded. Think clicks-and-mortar, social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capacity to morph. Think macro-innovative. Think client-focused. We will leverage the power of synergies to matrix. Think wireless. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for pushing the envelope. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be backward-compatible? Without sufficient channels, re-sizing reports are forced to become ubiquitous. What does the term "versioning" really mean? The power to e-enable virtually leads to the capability to seize intra-intuitively. Our functionality is unmatched, but our impactful deliverables and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "compliance". The R&D factor is clicks-and-mortar. If you aggregate dynamically, you may have to unleash micro-extensibly. We think that most front-end portals use far too much Python, and not enough Python. What does the term "communities" really mean? Your budget for redefining should be at least one-half of your budget for monetizing. Think cyber-revolutionary. The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Think macro-user-centric. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a dynamic plan of action for dealing with new infrastructures?