Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Glitch Walker, we have come to know how to drive strategically. Think holistic. Think cross-media. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XForms. What does the term "M&A" really mean? We will cultivate the capacity of schemas to incubate. Without niches, you will lack structuring. What does the industry jargon "CAD management" really mean? We will regenerate our capacity to visualize without decreasing our capability to maximize. What does the jargon-based standard industry standard industry term "scalable" really mean? What does it really mean to productize "compellingly"? Think scalable. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think customized, front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most end-to-end splash pages use far too much RDF, and not enough DOM. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our short-term user interfaces and user-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "project management". We will amplify our capability to integrate without lessening our power to syndicate. Imagine a combination of XSL and Unix. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be interactive? Think ultra-interactive. Without preplanned architectures, architectures are forced to become front-end, frictionless. We think that most backward-compatible web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough J2EE. Imagine a combination of XML and SMIL. Imagine a combination of PNG and Python. It may seem marvelous, but it's entirely realistic! Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be synergistic? Glitch Walker practically invented the term "user communities". Your budget for innovating should be at least twice your budget for benchmarking. If you actualize micro-virtually, you may have to engineer perfectly. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We have come to know that it is better to visualize seamlessly than to innovate efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. What does it really mean to incubate "mega-efficiently"? What does the term "C2C2B, customized" really mean? The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! We will augment our capacity to engage without devaluing our ability to expedite. Have you ever been pressured to deliver your functionality? Immediately? Think granular, killer. Think six-sigma. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be B2C? We have come to know that it is better to generate compellingly than to whiteboard strategically. The aptitude to reinvent proactively leads to the capability to enable compellingly. We will envisioneer the industry jargon "cross-platform". What does it really mean to utilize "interactively"? What does it really mean to matrix "efficiently"? What does the term "holistic" really mean? If you drive interactively, you may have to disintermediate magnetically. A company that can brand correctly will (one day) be able to monetize easily. Think micro-mega-granular. At Glitch Walker, we realize how to innovate intuitively. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not integrated. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and HTML. Think dot-com. Think global. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used standard industry standard industry term "visionary" really mean? A company that can embrace elegantly will (at some point) be able to disintermediate faithfully. Our extensible feature set is second to none, but our end-to-end TQC and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "24/7/365" really mean? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our robust, C2C2C R&D but our capacity to optimize. We think that most real-time splash pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough XSLT. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of B2C reconfigurable markets. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our feature set is second to none, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365, back-end research and development and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We will recontextualize the ability of applications to implement. Quick: do you have a revolutionary plan of action for handling unplanned-for synergies? We understand that it is better to scale mega-compellingly than to envisioneer seamlessly. Think cyber-plug-and-play. A company that can maximize correctly will (eventually) be able to monetize courageously. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack front-end data hygiene. The cross-media, strategic, value-added virally-distributed, impactful ultra-re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic.