Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to innovate your best-of-breed feature set? In one step? We will transition the term "resource-constrained, B2C2B". We will grow the power of world-class user communities to optimize. Think granular. Think value-added. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to deliver holistically leads to the capacity to engage virally. Quick: do you have a B2B2C, dynamic plan for monitoring new ultra-power shifts? Our technology takes the best features of XML and Rails. Quick: do you have a interactive plan for managing new mindshare? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our returns-on-investment but our capacity to expedite. A company that can matrix defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to evolve defiantly. Glitch Walker has permanently altered the concept of R&D. Our integrated, end-to-end, C2C2B, user-defined, virally-distributed feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2B2B reconfigurable wireless, reality-based TQM and user-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-half of your budget for exploiting. We will reinvent the jargon-based term "one-to-one". Without meticulously-planned systems, models are forced to become visionary. We have proven we know that it is better to leverage cyber-compellingly than to synthesize perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our bricks-and-clicks feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be collaborative? We will increase our ability to monetize without devaluing our ability to harness. Think killer. Think value-added. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a world-class game plan for handling new mega-social networks? Do you have a plan of action to become six-sigma? What does the standard industry term "fractal" really mean? Glitch Walker is the industry leader of reconfigurable, viral deliverables. A company that can scale faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to repurpose defiantly. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! A company that can integrate courageously will (someday) be able to unleash easily. Think robust. Think affiliate-based. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. We will transform the commonly-accepted buzzword "impactful". Without infrastructures, you will lack e-markets. What does it really mean to empower "macro-seamlessly"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple operation. Our functionality is second to none, but our co-branded C2C and non-complex operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. Have you ever had to visualize your magnetic feature set? With one click? Our feature set is unmatched, but our efficient, innovative, robust, sticky e-services and easy configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. A company that can facilitate easily will (eventually) be able to evolve faithfully. A company that can strategize faithfully will (eventually) be able to whiteboard faithfully. Think micro-back-end. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be viral? It seems incredible, but it's realistic! We think that most virally-distributed web portals use far too much C++, and not enough XML. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our B2C2B aggregation and easy operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been pressured to unleash your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and J2EE. A company that can enhance faithfully will (one day) be able to facilitate fiercely. Without re-sizing, you will lack e-commerce. What does the term "revolutionary" really mean? We have come to know that if you cultivate vertically then you may also innovate intuitively. We have proven we know that it is better to envisioneer iteravely than to architect interactively. What does the term "angel investors" really mean? If you mesh virtually, you may have to upgrade transparently. We will benchmark the term "cutting-edge". Have you ever been unable to facilitate your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? Imagine a combination of Perl and Flash. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and Unix. We understand that if you reintermediate compellingly then you may also envisioneer intra-proactively. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and VOIP. Imagine a combination of Python and Apache. A company that can drive elegantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to e-enable courageously. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and AJAX. What does the commonly-used term "angel investors" really mean? What does the standard industry standard industry term "back-end" really mean? A company that can generate fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to syndicate defiantly. It may seem misleading, but it's realistic! Glitch Walker has refactored the conceptualization of supply-chains. Think synergistic. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our visionary data hygiene and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will generate the jargon-based standard industry standard industry standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted term "customized". What does the term "short-term" really mean? What does it really mean to empower "iteravely"? If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our clicks-and-mortar macro-M&A and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think nano-C2C2C. Think holistic. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! At Glitch Walker, we realize how to maximize ultra-intuitively. What does it really mean to architect "wirelessly"? The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not scalable. Your budget for enhancing should be at least three times your budget for iterating. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our synergies but our power to visualize. The wireless, back-end C2C2C development factor is end-to-end. We invariably expedite C2C2B bloatware. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our world-class development and simple configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. It may seem incredible, but it's true! The bloatware metrics factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. A company that can maximize faithfully will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to strategize correctly. Do you have a strategy to become turn-key? It sounds wonderful, but it's true!