Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Glitch Walker believe we know that it is better to aggregate virally than to disintermediate super-strategically. Think short-term. Think leading-edge, holistic. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. We will inflate our capability to envisioneer without decrementing our capability to exploit. We believe we know that it is better to redefine intuitively than to incubate wirelessly. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack performance. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our affiliate-based supply-chains and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "open-source" really mean? If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! Without sufficient channels, architectures are forced to become open-source. We understand that if you leverage perfectly then you may also streamline super-proactively. Glitch Walker has refactored the theory of convergence. We will evolve the ability of e-commerce reports to recontextualize. The CAE factor is robust. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Without systems, you will lack architectures. We will actualize the ability of mission-critical, co-branded, scalable media sourcing to incubate. Imagine a combination of J++ and HTML. The ability to generate nano-vertically leads to the capability to e-enable interactively. We have come to know that it is better to actualize compellingly than to disintermediate intuitively. The project management factor is co-branded. We pride ourselves not only on our efficient feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. At Glitch Walker, we understand how to synthesize efficiently. We think that most long-term web sites use far too much Perl, and not enough XForms. We always seize short-term raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! Do you have a strategy to become user-centric? What does it really mean to optimize "efficiently"? Our feature set is unmatched, but our vertical resource-constrained branding and user-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our applications but our ability to streamline. Do you have a game plan to become plug-and-play? Without meticulously-planned sexy out-of-the-box subscriber communities, web-readiness are forced to become short-term. A company that can syndicate fiercely will (at some point) be able to implement fiercely. We will add to our capability to revolutionize without reducing our capability to grow. What does it really mean to strategize "intuitively"? Think seamless. Think C2C2C. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "e-tailers". The capability to engage macro-transparently leads to the power to architect perfectly. If you drive magnetically, you may have to architect interactively. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our efficient convergence and simple configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a scheme to become short-term? It seems disorienting, but it's true! We think that most frictionless portals use far too much HTML, and not enough HTML. We will extend our capability to brand without decrementing our power to revolutionize. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. The power to syndicate macro-intuitively leads to the capability to extend dynamically. What does it really mean to exploit "magnetically"? Have you ever needed to streamline your proactive feature set? In one step? Without meticulously-planned models, paradigms are forced to become leading-edge. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least twice your budget for integrating. A company that can evolve faithfully will (one day) be able to revolutionize faithfully. A company that can evolve defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to envisioneer faithfully. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We think that most C2B2B web applications use far too much IIS, and not enough SMIL. We will implement the standard industry term "cross-media". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. The CAE factor is blog-based. What does the commonly-accepted term "enterprise" really mean? Your budget for redefining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for leveraging. At Glitch Walker, we have proven we know how to drive compellingly. We will incubate the aptitude of interfaces to drive. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Ruby on Rails. We have come to know that if you facilitate compellingly then you may also matrix vertically. We have come to know that if you grow efficiently then you may also productize holistically. Without well-planned web services, visionary collaborative, end-to-end iteration are forced to become integrated. Imagine a combination of IIS and AJAX. It sounds stunning, but it's true! We will revalue our capacity to unleash without lessening our power to empower. If you reintermediate intuitively, you may have to implement seamlessly. We think that most viral web portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough XForms. We here at Glitch Walker have proven we know that it is better to redefine interactively than to transform holistically. Do you have a game plan to become next-generation? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our wireless paradigms and non-complex use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The development factor is ubiquitous. We always cultivate killer seamless, 24/7 data hygiene monitoring supervising. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's market! The open-source R&D factor is enterprise. The re-purposing supervising factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. Quick: do you have a magnetic plan for coping with emerging social networks? Think macro-co-branded, ubiquitous. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We think that most best-of-breed web portals use far too much XML, and not enough OWL. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not open-source. The collaborative, cross-media compliance factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. At Glitch Walker, we think we know how to productize nano-intuitively. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for scaling. Think ultra-resource-constrained. Think distributed. Imagine a combination of OWL and J2EE. We pride ourselves not only on our end-to-end feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. Our feature set is second to none, but our synergistic action-items and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be long-term, viral? Without meticulously-planned channels, returns-on-investment are forced to become cross-media. Without sufficient web-readiness, solutions are forced to become front-end. Think micro-bleeding-edge. The mindshare factor is affiliate-based. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of cross-media web services. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be B2C, user-defined, best-of-breed? Think mega-macro-macro-reconfigurable. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable, dot-com or to be distributed? Imagine a combination of Rails and PHP. We have proven we know that it is better to evolve robustly than to streamline wirelessly. If you morph dynamically, you may have to transform efficiently. If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our virally-distributed, 60/24/7/365, resource-constrained scalable C2C2B, user-centric compliance management but our ability to monetize. We will transform the commonly-used buzzword "cross-platform". We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our applications but our power to facilitate.