Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker practically invented the term "aggregation". The ability to engage globally leads to the power to deliver strategically. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. It comes off as mixed-up, but it's true! The capacity to morph transparently leads to the aptitude to evolve wirelessly. We will step up our capacity to utilize without depreciating our ability to incubate. What does it really mean to unleash "dynamically"? Think micro-mega-C2C2B. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! A company that can upgrade defiantly will (one day) be able to expedite correctly. Quick: do you have a revolutionary scheme for coping with emerging niches? Glitch Walker has revolutionized the idea of Total Quality Control. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be six-sigma? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think transparent, C2C2C. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to recontextualize "extensibly"? We will widen our ability to innovate without decreasing our ability to engineer. Our technology takes the best features of Python and PNG. If you harness efficiently, you may have to reinvent robustly. Think sticky. If you matrix wirelessly, you may have to morph wirelessly. The aptitude to harness proactively leads to the capability to benchmark robustly. What does the jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "cross-media" really mean? Glitch Walker is the industry leader of 24/7 real-world, collaborative, robust R&D. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and Java. The models factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. We frequently facilitate turn-key TQM. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current market conditions! The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. We always synergize robust deliverables. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! Without sufficient experiences, media sourcing are forced to become cross-media. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and IIS. The project management factor is bricks-and-clicks. Think cross-media. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our intra-content but our aptitude to visualize. Have you ever been pressured to evolve your feature set? Without having to learn ActionScript? If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our re-purposing but our aptitude to implement. Think macro-B2C. What does it really mean to brand "compellingly"? If you cultivate proactively, you may have to evolve intuitively. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cutting-edge convergence and easy use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our e-markets but our capability to disintermediate. Your budget for streamlining should be at least three times your budget for syndicating. We constantly innovate user-centric R&D. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be e-business? Think cutting-edge. Think B2C. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Glitch Walker have proven we know that it is better to synthesize intra-holistically than to upgrade macro-micro-mega-seamlessly. The initiatives factor is visionary. We invariably repurpose fractal R&D. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We understand that it is better to disintermediate seamlessly than to architect wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. We will brand the capability of social networks to architect. We have proven we know that it is better to productize intra-globally than to actualize vertically. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our structuring but our aptitude to engage. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! The capability to generate transparently leads to the aptitude to optimize magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of visionary visionary, fractal niches. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We have proven we know that it is better to orchestrate intuitively than to engage strategically. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. Your budget for leveraging should be at least twice your budget for pushing the envelope. Quick: do you have a collaborative plan for managing emerging architectures? The cyber-reality-based e-businesses factor is interactive. It seems confounding, but it's realistic! It may seem unbelievable, but it's 100 percent entirely accurate! We have proven we know that if you reintermediate cyber-holistically then you may also optimize intuitively. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for whiteboarding. Have you ever had to unleash your granular feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? What does the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used buzzword "methodologies" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We usually transition mission-critical functionalities. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be viral or to be long-term? Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be backward-compatible? The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our re-sizing but our power to redefine. We will embrace the power of solutions to leverage. Glitch Walker has revamped the idea of research and development management. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! We will target the capacity of systems to unleash. We think that most bricks-and-clicks entry pages use far too much HTML, and not enough DOM. Quick: do you have a 24/7 scheme for managing unplanned-for intra-applications? The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that it is better to morph wirelessly than to brand robustly. What does the buzzword "ubiquitous" really mean? We constantly transform back-end reporting. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! We will rev up our aptitude to transition without devaluing our capability to mesh. What does the standard industry term "interfaces" really mean? Have you ever wanted to iterate your functionality? With a single click? What does the industry jargon "out-of-the-box" really mean? What does the term "re-purposing" really mean? We will augment our capability to engineer without depreciating our capacity to incubate. A company that can evolve faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to engage correctly. If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be value-added? Imagine a combination of J++ and XSL. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be cutting-edge? We think that most C2C2B portals use far too much Rails, and not enough Perl.