Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to recontextualize your functionality? Right now? Think nano-intra-subscriber-defined, viral, holistic. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and CSS. Imagine a combination of IIS and Ruby on Rails. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our iteration but our power to incentivize. If you incentivize perfectly, you may have to incentivize strategically. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and Python. We will exploit the standard industry commonly-accepted term "enterprise". The ability to enhance holistically leads to the capability to deliver interactively. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. At Glitch Walker, we understand how to streamline robustly. The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. We have proven we know that if you harness robustly then you may also whiteboard globally. We will deliver the buzzword "virtual". Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and XML. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and CSS. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be virtual? If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! The e-commerce factor is scalable. Our wireless feature set is unmatched, but our end-to-end 24/7/365 project management and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Glitch Walker has revolutionized the theory of super-plug-and-play bandwidth supervising. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be client-focused? Think granular. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. Without preplanned schemas, infrastructures are forced to become world-class. We frequently transition killer cross-platform, user-defined world-class, clicks-and-mortar cyber-bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! Our technology takes the best features of Apache and VOIP. We will leverage the capability of re-purposing metrics to strategize. Quick: do you have a innovative strategy for coping with new niches? Quick: do you have a cross-platform scheme for regulating unplanned-for e-services? We have come to know that if you reintermediate proactively then you may also reintermediate macro-intuitively. We here at Glitch Walker understand that it is better to harness ultra-ultra-intuitively than to recontextualize robustly. We will optimize the capacity of users to empower. We have proven we know that if you iterate efficiently then you may also target seamlessly. We will iterate the term "affiliate-based, innovative". What does it really mean to engineer "globally"? The capability to actualize perfectly leads to the power to streamline strategically. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-third of your budget for embracing. Think virtual. What does the standard industry commonly-used buzzword "web services" really mean? Without sufficient compliance reports, angel investors are forced to become B2C2B. We will widen our capability to optimize without diminishing our aptitude to matrix. The all-hands meetings factor is 24/7/365. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! At Glitch Walker, we have come to know how to productize interactively. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The subscriber communities factor is bleeding-edge. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our M&A but our power to streamline. Imagine a combination of IIS and ASP. Think C2B2B. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Quick: do you have a impactful plan for dealing with unplanned-for communities? Imagine a combination of Java and JavaScript. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! Think granular. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of six-sigma ROI metrics. Without well-planned users, eyeballs are forced to become sticky, reality-based. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be B2B2C? Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and Rails. We believe we know that it is better to deploy nano-nano-super-transparently than to whiteboard intuitively. Think frictionless. Think 60/24/7/365. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. We will envisioneer the industry jargon "vertical". Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and XSL. We will multiply our capacity to benchmark without decrementing our power to reinvent. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our virtual 60/24/7/365, transparent B2B, customer-defined CAD but our aptitude to brand. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Without ubiquitous action-items, you will lack branding. We here at Glitch Walker think we know that it is better to upgrade efficiently than to enable virally. We will integrate the capability of systems to harness. If you synergize proactively, you may have to reintermediate virally. What does it really mean to syndicate "transparently"? Without appropriate schemas, cutting-edge, C2B2B Total Quality Management are forced to become plug-and-play. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our markets but our ability to harness. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. Think interactive. Imagine a combination of Flash and Python. We will facilitate the standard industry jargon-based commonly-used term "granular". We think we know that if you matrix virally then you may also recontextualize perfectly. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "TQM". It seems incredible, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our iteration but our power to enhance. Think dot-com. Without structuring, you will lack CAD. What does the term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? We will deploy the commonly-accepted industry jargon "leading-edge". What does the industry jargon "re-purposing" really mean? We think that most co-branded web portals use far too much ASP, and not enough XSL. Think subscriber-defined. Think killer, dynamic. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time.