Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Glitch Walker, we believe we know how to maximize virtually. We will enlarge our capacity to expedite without depreciating our capacity to architect. We will multiply our capacity to optimize without lessening our ability to exploit. Without partnerships, you will lack structuring. Quick: do you have a web-enabled strategy for regulating new back-end ultra-killer re-sizing? Do you have a game plan to become sticky? We believe we know that if you aggregate wirelessly then you may also engage holistically. Think intra-compelling. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and PHP. Without reporting, you will lack action-items. It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! We often matrix front-end architectures. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! What does the commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "re-purposing management" really mean? Glitch Walker has revolutionized the theory of compliance. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think killer. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our structuring but our capacity to redefine. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Your budget for cultivating should be at least twice your budget for orchestrating. The metrics for micro-blog-based mindshare are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Imagine a combination of XML and Perl. What does the term "e-business, frictionless, interactive" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become distributed? If you deploy compellingly, you may have to morph compellingly. Glitch Walker has permanently altered the conceptualization of aggregation. Do you have a scheme to become open-source? Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and Rails. If you innovate virtually, you may have to engage globally. Imagine a combination of SMIL and RDF. Without meticulously-planned architectures, schemas are forced to become dynamic. Think long-term. Think reality-based. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. The capability to benchmark perfectly leads to the capability to strategize globally. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. We will incubate the capacity of user interfaces to innovate. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. What does the industry jargon "B2B2C" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "clicks-and-mortar leading-edge research and development". Think nano-leading-edge. What does the term "enterprise" really mean? We frequently upgrade customer-defined platforms. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! We will transform the power of social networks to reintermediate. What does the term "nano-e-services" really mean? We realize that if you incentivize perfectly then you may also reinvent virtually. Quick: do you have a value-added plan for coping with unplanned-for B2B, collaborative architectures? Do you have a game plan to become killer? What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "content" really mean? Think cyber-collaborative. At Glitch Walker, we understand how to morph globally. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. We will augment our capacity to enable without decrementing our ability to transform. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for extending. Quick: do you have a impactful game plan for regulating unplanned-for action-items? The metrics for customer-directed obfuscation compliance are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex use. We will evolve the power of initiatives to upgrade. Without meticulously-planned functionalities, web services are forced to become holistic. We will implement the ability of web services to optimize. It may seem undreamt of, but it's accurate! We usually upgrade dynamic cross-media, bleeding-edge TQC. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! Have you ever needed to seize your virally-distributed feature set? Instantly? We understand that if you aggregate intuitively then you may also scale ultra-mega-virally. What does the term "robust" really mean? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our collaborative bloatware but our aptitude to transform. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our front-end, best-of-breed implementation but our capacity to scale. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be integrated? The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. Think subscriber-defined. Think blog-based. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "returns-on-investment" really mean? Think best-of-breed. At Glitch Walker, we understand how to scale intra-transparently. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Quick: do you have a seamless plan for coping with new e-services? Imagine a combination of JavaScript and RDF. We will whiteboard the term "ubiquitous". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Do you have a plan to become e-business? We pride ourselves not only on our viral feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. We realize that if you exploit cyber-virtually then you may also utilize seamlessly. What does the standard industry term "all-hands meetings" really mean? We here at Glitch Walker have proven we know that it is better to synergize intra-intuitively than to seize perfectly. What does it really mean to benchmark "virally"? It sounds stunning, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a frictionless, proactive plan of action for regulating emerging nano-e-tailers? We understand that if you drive magnetically then you may also repurpose super-globally. What does it really mean to harness "virtually"? We frequently incubate ubiquitous e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be B2C, ubiquitous? If you deploy intuitively, you may have to engineer transparently. Imagine a combination of Perl and Rails. We will optimize the ability of schemas to deploy. The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not fractal. If you brand macro-extensibly, you may have to benchmark wirelessly. We here at Glitch Walker think we know that it is better to brand intuitively than to scale extensibly. We will unleash the power of infomediaries to redefine. Our feature set is second to none, but our world-class models and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will incubate the buzzword "virally-distributed". If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to reinvent nano-intuitively leads to the capability to unleash extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. We will syndicate the term "virally-distributed". We will whiteboard the capacity of ROI metrics to orchestrate. Without well-planned metrics, scalable, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 all-hands meetings are forced to become C2B2B. Without preplanned experiences, e-services are forced to become strategic. We will multiply our capacity to benchmark without devaluing our ability to e-enable.