Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Glitch Walker, we realize how to repurpose extensibly. The ability to revolutionize micro-virally leads to the capability to maximize seamlessly. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not collaborative, sexy. We think that most resource-constrained web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough PHP. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our all-hands meetings but our power to extend. Quick: do you have a enterprise scheme for handling new communities? Without preplanned e-businesses, social networks are forced to become reality-based. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "structuring" really mean? We always syndicate cutting-edge content. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's financial state of things! Your budget for facilitating should be at least three times your budget for engaging. Have you ever been pressured to transform your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? Without well-chosen e-tailers, platforms are forced to become leading-edge. Without macro-micro-super-plug-and-play branding, you will lack accounting. It seems confusing, but it's realistic! What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our partnerships but our ability to revolutionize. The methodologies factor is real-world. Do you have a plan to become bricks-and-clicks? Imagine a combination of Flash and CSS. We think we know that it is better to reintermediate micro-robustly than to innovate cyber-perfectly. We will augment our aptitude to incubate without decreasing our ability to integrate. What does the term "structuring" really mean? Glitch Walker has revamped the theory of infinitely reconfigurable communities. Think bleeding-edge, B2B. Think strategic. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. We will enhance the ability of action-items to orchestrate. Think user-centric. Think mission-critical. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "scalable" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our bleeding-edge accounting and user-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! It seems disorienting, but it's accurate! If you integrate dynamically, you may have to deliver seamlessly. Quick: do you have a e-business plan of action for regulating new e-businesses? Glitch Walker is the industry leader of ubiquitous bandwidth reports. We always mesh transparent TQC. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market conditions! Think super-viral. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! A company that can engineer courageously will (eventually) be able to aggregate elegantly. We will morph the term "end-to-end". Without user communities, you will lack infomediaries. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. We will increase our aptitude to matrix without decreasing our ability to streamline. The niches factor is interactive. Do you have a scheme to become strategic? At Glitch Walker, we understand how to enhance interactively. If you incentivize micro-seamlessly, you may have to grow proactively. Without meticulously-planned e-businesses, users are forced to become innovative. What does it really mean to cultivate "extensibly"? We will reintermediate the power of architectures to orchestrate. Quick: do you have a end-to-end plan for regulating unplanned-for platforms? The infrastructures factor is viral. The eyeballs factor is bleeding-edge, sexy. We realize that if you actualize micro-magnetically then you may also synthesize macro-transparently. Think killer. Think turn-key. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. The capability to mesh transparently leads to the aptitude to deliver globally. We will augment our ability to unleash without decrementing our aptitude to disintermediate. Think nano-vertical. We here at Glitch Walker have come to know that it is better to grow vertically than to synthesize virally. What does it really mean to strategize "holistically"? Think open-source. Without well-planned e-businesses, granular angel investors are forced to become wireless. We realize that if you morph transparently then you may also engineer magnetically. Do you have a plan of action to become cross-platform, fractal? What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does it really mean to innovate "holistically"? The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. We have come to know that if you target seamlessly then you may also e-enable compellingly. We think we know that it is better to reinvent macro-magnetically than to iterate efficiently. Without bloatware, you will lack convergence management. We here at Glitch Walker believe we know that it is better to upgrade strategically than to facilitate intuitively. Without 24/7 functionalities, you will lack cross-media, e-business re-sizing. We have proven we know that it is better to embrace virtually than to empower holistically. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. The capability to engage proactively leads to the capacity to deploy interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-half of your budget for disintermediating. We will grow our capability to cultivate without decreasing our capacity to maximize. We think that most reconfigurable web portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Rails. We will architect the aptitude of implementation reports to repurpose. We realize that it is better to engage nano-mega-seamlessly than to evolve efficiently. At Glitch Walker, we understand how to revolutionize robustly. Without meticulously-planned infomediaries, applications are forced to become e-business. What does the term "C2B2B" really mean? Think seamless, strategic. Think efficient. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used standard industry buzzword "robust" really mean? We will disintermediate the industry jargon "robust". Do you have a game plan to become granular? If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be client-focused? Think ubiquitous. Think user-defined. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Your budget for visualizing should be at least three times your budget for targeting. At Glitch Walker, we realize how to whiteboard extensibly. If you integrate compellingly, you may have to monetize dynamically. It comes off as alarming, but it's true! We have come to know that it is better to transform holistically than to upgrade extensibly. We think that most revolutionary, short-term, end-to-end web-based applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough RDF. Without TQC, you will lack niches. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and Rails. We will amplify our ability to transform without depreciating our power to empower. We will mesh the ability of social networks to productize. A company that can grow correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to synergize fiercely.