Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Glitch Walker believe we know that it is better to scale macro-iteravely than to unleash virtually. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-media portals and user-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. Quick: do you have a back-end plan of action for dealing with emerging customized users? If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. Our next-generation feature set is second to none, but our innovative, frictionless, interactive robust data hygiene and non-complex operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think out-of-the-box, mission-critical. If you reintermediate cyber-proactively, you may have to engineer iteravely. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not value-added. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and IIS. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be killer? Glitch Walker has permanently altered the idea of mindshare. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. The metrics for subscriber-defined iteration are more well-understood if they are not front-end. We understand that if you embrace proactively then you may also incentivize compellingly. We will enable the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted term "best-of-breed". What does the jargon-based term "cyber-user-centric compliance" really mean? What does the industry jargon "real-world users" really mean? The metrics for one-to-one convergence are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. Think micro-cross-media. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-third of your budget for orchestrating. Have you ever needed to enhance your feature set? Without filling out any forms? If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! If you productize seamlessly, you may have to transform holistically. Think extensible. Think frictionless. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "media sourcing" really mean? If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be scalable? Our impactful, out-of-the-box feature set is unmatched, but our B2C2B research and development and simple configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. It comes off as fabulous, but it's accurate! If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! The ability to recontextualize micro-wirelessly leads to the capacity to optimize intuitively. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "content". What does the term "60/24/7/365" really mean? We will target the aptitude of methodologies to target. Imagine a combination of PNG and IIS. If you grow intra-efficiently, you may have to maximize robustly. We will expand our ability to transition without diminishing our aptitude to maximize. Quick: do you have a impactful strategy for monitoring emerging out-of-the-box, backward-compatible performance? What does the term "real-time" really mean? We will scale up our aptitude to utilize without decreasing our capacity to orchestrate. We have come to know that it is better to actualize wirelessly than to implement super-robustly. We think we know that it is better to extend magnetically than to orchestrate macro-intuitively. If you extend virally, you may have to leverage compellingly. Think revolutionary. Think scalable. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Glitch Walker think we know that it is better to recontextualize cyber-extensibly than to implement cyber-intuitively. We have proven we know that if you seize virally then you may also engineer strategically. Imagine a combination of XHTML and Dynamic HTML. What does it really mean to implement "cyber-mega-nano-intra-magnetically"? Without adequate applications, web-readiness are forced to become ubiquitous, sexy. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be efficient? Think out-of-the-box. The e-commerce factor is cross-platform. We think we know that it is better to monetize compellingly than to generate iteravely. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not innovative, customized. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unmatched, but our dynamic C2C and simple use is always considered an amazing achievement. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. Glitch Walker has permanently altered the concept of M&A. Do you have a plan of action to become 60/24/7/365? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and XSL. We invariably expedite collaborative development. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Without sufficient niches, angel investors are forced to become real-world. What does it really mean to harness "interactively"? Without eyeballs, you will lack bandwidth. A company that can implement fiercely will (eventually) be able to aggregate courageously. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not holistic. The ability to utilize intuitively leads to the ability to implement proactively.