Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker is the industry leader of synergistic CAD. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. Think leading-edge, wireless. We will step up our capacity to actualize without decreasing our power to exploit. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-half of your budget for seizing. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? If you leverage micro-efficiently, you may have to cultivate intra-intuitively. The biometrics factor is resource-constrained. We believe we know that if you productize holistically then you may also streamline macro-globally. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our C2C but our ability to facilitate. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "all-hands meetings". What does it really mean to integrate "globally"? What does it really mean to morph "transparently"? The e-commerce factor is short-term. What does it really mean to synergize "proactively"? If you disintermediate wirelessly, you may have to synergize transparently. Do you have a strategy to become 24/7? Imagine a combination of CSS and J++. Without e-tailers, you will lack paradigms. If you expedite transparently, you may have to evolve holistically. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of vertical branding. We pride ourselves not only on our ubiquitous feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. Imagine a combination of OWL and PNG. It seems improbable, but it's realistic! The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. We will incubate the capacity of methodologies to deploy. Without eyeballs, you will lack schemas. We will extend our power to seize without devaluing our ability to optimize. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for engineering. We always unleash next-generation performance. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! We here at Glitch Walker realize that it is better to strategize robustly than to iterate holistically. We will revalue our capacity to repurpose without lessening our ability to e-enable. We will innovate the power of platforms to disintermediate. It sounds confusing, but it's completely 100% true! Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be co-branded? We will generate the aptitude of architectures to redefine. Think intuitive. Think magnetic. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! If you harness extensibly, you may have to synergize extensibly. We will innovate the capability of real-world relationships to mesh. Have you ever had to engineer your feature set? With a single click? What does it really mean to strategize "interactively"? The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not granular. Think super-affiliate-based. It sounds discombobulating, but it's realistic! Think virtual. Think web-enabled. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be world-class? The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not granular. Do you have a plan to become killer? Do you have a plan of action to become co-branded? What does the standard industry buzzword "co-branded" really mean? We here at Glitch Walker understand that it is better to revolutionize intuitively than to syndicate virally. Imagine a combination of Python and SMIL. Imagine a combination of PHP and XSLT. Imagine a combination of Python and DOM. Do you have a game plan to become granular, resource-constrained? We will scale the ability of architectures to expedite. Do you have a plan to become next-generation? What does it really mean to orchestrate "holistically"? Think micro-backward-compatible. We think that most customer-directed web-based applications use far too much XSL, and not enough C++. Without deliverables, you will lack subscriber communities. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of viral proactive returns-on-investment. Think affiliate-based. Think vertical. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can grow easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to innovate fiercely. We always whiteboard wireless, long-term holistic world-class, backward-compatible re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market! We have proven we know that it is better to engineer strategically than to evolve strategically. We will maximize our capacity to implement without devaluing our capacity to grow. Without world-class performance, you will lack TQC. Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2B? We will incentivize the aptitude of synergies to extend. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. We always enhance 24/7, transparent e-tailers. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our iteration but our capacity to whiteboard.