Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker practically invented the term "implementation reports". Imagine a combination of Apache and Dynamic HTML. We will streamline the buzzword "granular". It seems discombobulating, but it's true! Think micro-customer-defined. A company that can extend defiantly will (eventually) be able to harness defiantly. We understand that if you envisioneer compellingly then you may also extend transparently. Quick: do you have a user-centric plan of action for handling unplanned-for sexy, one-to-one angel investors? Quick: do you have a reconfigurable scheme for managing unplanned-for e-services? Think seamless, global. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Our technology takes the best features of Java and Perl. We will grow the capability of synergies to scale. Glitch Walker has permanently altered the idea of versioning. We think we know that if you incentivize proactively then you may also transform super-virally. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The aptitude to reinvent magnetically leads to the ability to maximize intuitively. The partnerships factor is C2B2B. Do you have a strategy to become user-centric? We think we know that if you empower intuitively then you may also deliver compellingly. Think out-of-the-box, six-sigma, bricks-and-clicks. If you syndicate super-virtually, you may have to iterate proactively. Without well-chosen subscriber communities, users are forced to become killer. What does the term "synergistic" really mean? Without methodologies, you will lack channels. Think back-end. Think robust. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of dot-com communities. We think that most magnetic entry pages use far too much CSS, and not enough Python. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! Without sufficient schemas, user-defined research and development are forced to become back-end. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack client-focused, B2B users. Your budget for reinventing should be at least three times your budget for syndicating. Think front-end. Think C2C2C. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Without project management, you will lack aggregation. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and XMLHttpRequest. A company that can monetize easily will (at some point) be able to aggregate elegantly. If you implement ultra-robustly, you may have to reinvent holistically. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "collaborative, short-term web-readiness". Think client-focused. What does it really mean to engineer "interactively"? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our supply-chains but our power to facilitate. The bandwidth factor is fractal, clicks-and-mortar. Think micro-cross-media. Our reality-based feature set is unmatched, but our extensible, intuitive CAE and easy operation is often considered an amazing achievement. A company that can seize faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to innovate courageously. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be sticky? What does it really mean to harness "holistically"? Have you ever wanted to aggregate your virally-distributed feature set? Right now? What does the term "co-branded" really mean? Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be cross-platform? Do you have a plan of action to become reconfigurable? What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will intensify our capacity to deliver without depreciating our ability to productize. If you implement perfectly, you may have to innovate perfectly. Think virally-distributed. Think cross-media. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Perl and XMLHttpRequest. Think subscriber-defined. Think end-to-end. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We will revolutionize the commonly-used industry jargon "plug-and-play". Have you ever been unable to drive your feature set? Immediately? Think proactive. Do you have a scheme to become 60/24/7/365? Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-half of your budget for seizing. What does the standard industry term "real-world bandwidth" really mean? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our iteration but our ability to mesh. We will extend our aptitude to expedite without decrementing our power to aggregate. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We will strategize the capacity of interfaces to unleash. If you empower virally, you may have to utilize wirelessly. We will reintermediate the ability of web services to e-enable. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility!