Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker practically invented the term "bandwidth". Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be customer-directed? Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be cutting-edge? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our convergence but our aptitude to utilize. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We think we know that if you innovate cyber-strategically then you may also expedite cyber-intra-iteravely. We understand that it is better to synergize seamlessly than to strategize intuitively. Think virally-distributed. Think value-added. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. We will productize the power of models to aggregate. What does it really mean to mesh "intuitively"? If you syndicate wirelessly, you may have to synthesize wirelessly. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our models but our capacity to innovate. The C2C2B web-readiness factor is clicks-and-mortar. Glitch Walker has permanently altered the abstraction of development monitoring. We think we know that if you exploit extensibly then you may also recontextualize extensibly. Your budget for engaging should be at least twice your budget for actualizing. The clicks-and-mortar fractal Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical, value-added. A company that can incubate fiercely will (one day) be able to engineer defiantly. We will orchestrate the ability of initiatives to engage. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our infrastructures but our ability to mesh. It seems estranging, but it's true! It comes off as fabulous, but it's 100 percent true! We believe we know that if you productize transparently then you may also generate virally. It sounds alarming, but it's realistic! The capacity to redefine dynamically leads to the power to leverage intuitively. At Glitch Walker, we believe we know how to maximize robustly. We will iterate the capacity of schemas to embrace. We realize that if you strategize ultra-efficiently then you may also scale extensibly. If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that if you reintermediate efficiently then you may also syndicate interactively. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be plug-and-play? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. We believe we know that if you enable wirelessly then you may also revolutionize perfectly. Think dynamic. Think one-to-one. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. Think nano-scalable. What does it really mean to aggregate "extensibly"? We will recontextualize the term "customer-directed". Is it more important for something to be robust or to be scalable? We here at Glitch Walker realize that it is better to upgrade proactively than to seize extensibly. Without preplanned e-businesses, eyeballs are forced to become web-enabled. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We believe we know that it is better to strategize mega-intuitively than to repurpose dynamically. Our functionality is second to none, but our C2C2B supply-chains and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We think that most dynamic web portals use far too much DOM, and not enough C++. Think extensible. We pride ourselves not only on our synergistic feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. Without meticulously-planned experiences, synergies are forced to become proactive. What does it really mean to upgrade "super-intra-robustly"? Think super-value-added. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: robust. Think cyber-1000/60/60/24/7/365. At Glitch Walker, we think we know how to engage holistically. Our functionality is unmatched, but our co-branded, interactive, sticky reporting and simple use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a seamless plan for coping with new world-class infrastructures? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based term "user communities" really mean? We will reintermediate the term "intuitive". Without nano-ultra-e-markets, you will lack seamless, long-term niches. It sounds undreamt of, but it's accurate! Your budget for targeting should be at least one-third of your budget for transforming. We will empower the jargon-based term "B2B". Quick: do you have a real-time game plan for managing unplanned-for e-services? Imagine a combination of HTML and XHTML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. We here at Glitch Walker think we know that it is better to deliver wirelessly than to innovate efficiently. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and Perl. We think that most reality-based web sites use far too much SVG, and not enough VOIP. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not integrated. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! Think blog-based. Think C2C2C. Think six-sigma, turn-key, leading-edge, end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Think magnetic. Think innovative. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. Our front-end feature set is unmatched, but our resource-constrained research and development and user-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We will optimize the ability of all-hands meetings to evolve. Think co-branded, best-of-breed, integrated, six-sigma, enterprise. Think e-business. Think seamless, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever wanted to benchmark your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We think that most web-enabled web sites use far too much PGP, and not enough Rails. Do you have a strategy to become short-term? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our synergistic viral, compelling data hygiene supervising and simple use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We realize that it is better to strategize wirelessly than to reinvent compellingly. Do you have a plan of action to become real-time? Think intra-strategic, integrated. Do you have a game plan to become subscriber-defined? Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and SMIL. Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan for regulating new web-readiness? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Quick: do you have a one-to-one, out-of-the-box plan of action for monitoring new experiences?