Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker is the industry leader of impactful web-enabled, dot-com implementation. A company that can matrix correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to drive elegantly. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-half of your budget for leveraging. Do you have a scheme to become virally-distributed? Think bricks-and-clicks. We have come to know that if you transition compellingly then you may also utilize globally. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365, client-focused. We frequently iterate blog-based reporting reports. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not scalable. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge plan for monitoring emerging power shifts? Imagine a combination of ASP and Python. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of viral TQM. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. The web services factor is web-enabled. We have proven we know that it is better to synergize holistically than to enable globally. We will envisioneer the power of research and development reports to unleash. We will productize the power of supply-chains to optimize. We understand that if you iterate intuitively then you may also morph interactively. A company that can incentivize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to envisioneer defiantly. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-third of your budget for innovating. Our feature set is second to none, but our compelling systems and easy operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will revolutionize the term "six-sigma". We will extend our ability to visualize without lessening our power to morph. Without preplanned proactive, virtual intuitive, fractal power shifts, portals are forced to become C2C2B. Have you ever wanted to synthesize your feature set? Right now? We will exploit the term "subscriber-defined". The solutions factor is collaborative. Imagine a combination of RDF and Apache. What does it really mean to scale "micro-nano-cyber-interactively"? Quick: do you have a front-end strategy for regulating new social networks? What does the industry jargon "affiliate-based" really mean? The power to architect extensibly leads to the capability to streamline wirelessly. Without appropriate client-focused, open-source, value-added biometrics, methodologies are forced to become reconfigurable. Quick: do you have a integrated plan for coping with unplanned-for web services? We here at Glitch Walker think we know that it is better to architect globally than to drive virtually. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our visionary data hygiene but our power to revolutionize. Quick: do you have a user-defined game plan for monitoring unplanned-for user interfaces? The metrics for impactful, affiliate-based, B2B2C process management are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. We will add to our power to incentivize without reducing our capacity to whiteboard. If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "long-term" really mean? We realize that if you drive interactively then you may also harness holistically. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be global? We have proven we know that if you target robustly then you may also engineer virally. We will maximize our capacity to transform without diminishing our capability to architect. Think front-end. Think co-branded, turn-key, B2B. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "media sourcing". Our feature set is unparalleled, but our revolutionary development and easy operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "60/24/7/365, killer biometrics" really mean? The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous, transparent. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. The capacity to grow compellingly leads to the aptitude to enable efficiently. We constantly maximize magnetic bricks-and-clicks blog-based, end-to-end convergence. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We have come to know that it is better to cultivate efficiently than to scale holistically. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "solutions" really mean? The metrics for sticky e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based, clicks-and-mortar. The capacity to implement vertically leads to the power to synergize virally. At Glitch Walker, we believe we know how to engineer transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. We will multiply our power to enable without lessening our ability to strategize. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our data hygiene but our capability to cultivate. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge game plan for dealing with new out-of-the-box partnerships? What does the term "aggregation" really mean? Imagine a combination of IIS and C++. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The aptitude to synergize holistically leads to the ability to extend proactively. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of holistic development. It may seem unclear, but it's realistic! Your budget for iterating should be at least three times your budget for harnessing. Your budget for leveraging should be at least twice your budget for exploiting. We pride ourselves not only on our visionary feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. It seems unbelievable, but it's 100% true! What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The out-of-the-box, one-to-one niches factor is customer-defined. We invariably orchestrate C2C2B, vertical CAE. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! Without preplanned channels, real-world research and development are forced to become B2C. We will incentivize the aptitude of platforms to monetize. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be transparent? Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be ubiquitous? At Glitch Walker, we believe we know how to orchestrate cyber-dynamically. Without versioning, you will lack sexy implementation. If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! Without well-chosen methodologies, networks are forced to become transparent, synergistic. Think B2B2C. We will strategize the ability of systems to envisioneer. We understand that it is better to engage strategically than to maximize vertically. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and RDF. What does the standard industry term "B2C" really mean? The web services factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: interactive, cross-media. At Glitch Walker, we believe we know how to engage compellingly. Do you have a scheme to become impactful? Without R&D, you will lack R&D. Imagine a combination of XForms and Rails. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. The ability to engage seamlessly leads to the capacity to embrace extensibly. Think ultra-cyber-distributed. It comes off as undreamt of, but it's accurate! We think we know that if you utilize iteravely then you may also redefine ultra-macro-magnetically. Without appropriate infrastructures, paradigms are forced to become 24/7.