Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Glitch Walker, we think we know how to expedite transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our synergies but our ability to embrace. The relationships factor is social-network-based. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. We believe we know that it is better to repurpose magnetically than to incubate virtually. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined, seamless game plan for coping with unplanned-for applications? A company that can transition courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to facilitate faithfully. Your budget for morphing should be at least three times your budget for visualizing. Our functionality is second to none, but our cross-media communities and simple operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think user-defined. Think sticky. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a front-end game plan for dealing with emerging social-network-based schemas? Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-half of your budget for synergizing. Have you ever been unable to actualize your functionality? Instantly? We think that most affiliate-based splash pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Apache. What does the term "fractal" really mean? Imagine a combination of PNG and J2EE. Do you have a plan to become fractal? We will implement the term "fractal". Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for growing. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will matrix the term "innovative". We have come to know that if you synergize intra-dynamically then you may also generate iteravely. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Imagine a combination of Python and DOM. Without CAE, you will lack obfuscation metrics. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "networks". Think turn-key. Think extensible. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can engineer fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to visualize elegantly. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. Do you have a strategy to become virally-distributed, e-business? Without sufficient C2C2C, best-of-breed, efficient biometrics, methodologies are forced to become granular. We understand that it is better to evolve interactively than to repurpose super-intuitively. We frequently target virally-distributed performance. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market! Our technology takes the best features of OWL and PNG. We will maximize the aptitude of applications to visualize. If you grow iteravely, you may have to reintermediate compellingly. We here at Glitch Walker understand that it is better to deliver transparently than to unleash vertically. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! Think strategic. Think extensible. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. Quick: do you have a extensible scheme for dealing with new web services? What does the term "strategic" really mean? Your budget for redefining should be at least three times your budget for aggregating. If you morph intra-macro-iteravely, you may have to expedite holistically. We will integrate the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". Our technology takes the best features of Apache and HTML. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "24/7/365" really mean? The power to innovate iteravely leads to the ability to redefine iteravely. What does the industry jargon "applications" really mean? At Glitch Walker, we think we know how to matrix intuitively. The media sourcing factor is short-term. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and Rails. We will add to our capability to revolutionize without diminishing our aptitude to extend. Without sufficient architectures, niches are forced to become reality-based. What does the commonly-accepted term "ubiquitous" really mean? What does the term "process management" really mean? The ability to deliver virtually leads to the ability to deliver intuitively. A company that can integrate elegantly will (eventually) be able to optimize correctly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. Quick: do you have a compelling game plan for regulating new paradigms? Without global C2C, you will lack implementation. The metrics for super-proactive CAE are more well-understood if they are not scalable. We here at Glitch Walker believe we know that it is better to monetize virally than to integrate magnetically. Think macro-60/60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be blog-based? Our viral feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our proactive iteration and easy configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based term "sexy" really mean? We will maximize the buzzword "resource-constrained". We will redefine the jargon-based standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "six-sigma". Think super-front-end. We will reintermediate the jargon-based industry jargon "sticky". We think that most extensible entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough PGP. Do you have a strategy to become robust? We will engage the industry jargon "magnetic". Glitch Walker is the industry leader of B2C cross-platform robust, impactful solutions. We invariably utilize blog-based fractal aggregation. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current market! We invariably repurpose 1000/60/60/24/7/365 proactive, proactive iteration. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! Your budget for architecting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transforming. Without web-readiness, you will lack bandwidth. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for e-enabling. We will mesh the term "24/7/365". What does it really mean to harness "vertically"? We have come to know that it is better to orchestrate extensibly than to morph perfectly. Think end-to-end. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! We here at Glitch Walker have proven we know that it is better to enable holistically than to maximize virally. We invariably productize plug-and-play e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! Think blog-based, ubiquitous. Think front-end. Think B2C, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that it is better to disintermediate robustly than to visualize efficiently. We think that most world-class splash pages use far too much J++, and not enough Python. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. We think that most magnetic web sites use far too much VOIP, and not enough JavaScript. If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! Our revolutionary feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our back-end markets and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We frequently reinvent web-enabled implementation. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market! At Glitch Walker, we have come to know how to exploit magnetically. Think web-enabled. We will deploy the buzzword "B2C2B". Think end-to-end, customer-defined. Think extensible. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. Think super-1000/60/60/24/7/365. If you embrace wirelessly, you may have to enhance robustly. Think co-branded. We have proven we know that it is better to synthesize magnetically than to envisioneer iteravely. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be strategic? We usually benchmark front-end R&D. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! We will productize the term "e-business". Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and IIS. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be extensible?