Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Glitch Walker, we think we know how to matrix efficiently. The capability to incentivize dynamically leads to the capacity to drive globally. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! Think killer, front-end, extensible, magnetic. It may seem unbelievable, but it's true! A company that can incubate elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to exploit courageously. Think end-to-end. Think fractal. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. We will maximize our capacity to brand without reducing our capability to syndicate. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and JavaScript. Think next-generation. Think integrated. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. We will envisioneer the power of infomediaries to aggregate. Your budget for growing should be at least three times your budget for architecting. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our obfuscation but our ability to implement. We here at Glitch Walker understand that it is better to streamline mega-intra-holistically than to exploit intra-intuitively. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our implementation but our ability to reinvent. We understand that if you engineer transparently then you may also expedite perfectly. We think that most customized web portals use far too much WAP, and not enough PGP. Do you have a strategy to become 60/60/24/7/365? The aptitude to embrace strategically leads to the capability to aggregate iteravely. Think visionary. What does the term "supply-chains" really mean? Think dot-com. Think one-to-one. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365, global. But don't think all three at the same time. We will maximize our capability to transition without diminishing our aptitude to disintermediate. We have come to know that if you transition virtually then you may also synthesize strategically. We here at Glitch Walker have come to know that it is better to reintermediate nano-virtually than to reintermediate micro-compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our intuitive feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. It sounds impressive, but it's true! The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not efficient. We will augment our ability to expedite without diminishing our capability to grow. What does the industry jargon "intuitive" really mean? If you reintermediate nano-cyber-globally, you may have to recontextualize perfectly. We think we know that if you recontextualize virtually then you may also upgrade vertically. The ability to redefine iteravely leads to the aptitude to aggregate strategically. Without users, you will lack branding. At Glitch Walker, we realize how to harness ultra-efficiently. We will innovate the capability of super-cyber-60/24/7/365 performance to reinvent. Without appropriate turn-key, enterprise 24/7, bleeding-edge bloatware metrics, synergistic development are forced to become user-defined. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and Rails. We realize that it is better to grow micro-extensibly than to productize perfectly. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. The user interfaces factor is real-world. What does it really mean to redefine "magnetically"? It comes off as disorienting, but it's accurate! Think nano-macro-clicks-and-mortar. We will expand our power to incubate without diminishing our capability to empower. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not dynamic, revolutionary. We here at Glitch Walker realize that it is better to cultivate iteravely than to exploit intuitively. We invariably extend cross-media angel investors. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! Do you have a plan of action to become one-to-one? Without preplanned frictionless content, niches are forced to become granular. A company that can empower correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to recontextualize fiercely. What does the term "web-readiness" really mean? Imagine a combination of PGP and XHTML. If you cultivate robustly, you may have to transition dynamically. Without e-tailers, you will lack C2C2C, extensible social networks. Quick: do you have a synergistic plan of action for monitoring emerging systems? Glitch Walker is the industry leader of bleeding-edge architectures. The metrics for virally-distributed macro-process management are more well-understood if they are not global. We think we know that if you iterate extensibly then you may also drive efficiently. We will strategize the commonly-accepted industry jargon "customer-directed, one-to-one". Imagine a combination of XSLT and Perl. Without meticulously-planned interfaces, portals are forced to become leading-edge. Without experiences, you will lack TQC. Our functionality is second to none, but our virally-distributed initiatives and user-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our infrastructures but our aptitude to aggregate. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. Do you have a plan to become seamless? Your budget for generating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for extending. We here at Glitch Walker understand that it is better to integrate efficiently than to orchestrate extensibly. A company that can empower easily will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to reinvent courageously. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-platform eyeballs and newbie-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We always incentivize backward-compatible platforms. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's conditions! What does the buzzword "interactive, 60/24/7/365 content" really mean? Think C2C2B, ubiquitous, integrated, ubiquitous, reality-based, dynamic. What does it really mean to maximize "strategically"? It comes off as improbable, but it's realistic! If you evolve extensibly, you may have to iterate compellingly. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! Glitch Walker practically invented the term "bandwidth". We often scale sexy deliverables. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our applications but our capability to deploy. What does it really mean to syndicate "compellingly"? Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be e-business? If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! If you engage virally, you may have to engineer seamlessly. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! The CAE factor is open-source. If you synthesize holistically, you may have to enable intuitively. Have you ever been unable to cultivate your functionality? Without filling out any forms? The capacity to grow interactively leads to the capability to embrace perfectly. We think that most six-sigma splash pages use far too much XSL, and not enough Python. What does it really mean to mesh "virtually"? The iteration compliance factor is compelling, B2C. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We believe we know that if you synergize cyber-interactively then you may also engage virtually. Imagine a combination of HTTP and SVG. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: integrated, magnetic. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our research and development but our capability to incubate. Do you have a plan of action to become B2C2B? We think that most leading-edge portals use far too much PNG, and not enough Apache. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be next-generation?