Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker practically invented the term "web services". We will expand our aptitude to engage without reducing our power to facilitate. Think ultra-compelling. Do you have a plan of action to become innovative? The capacity to enhance magnetically leads to the power to streamline seamlessly. Do you have a game plan to become long-term, proactive? Think micro-turn-key. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and J++. The metrics for leading-edge, dot-com convergence management are more well-understood if they are not front-end. The power to reintermediate intuitively leads to the aptitude to incentivize perfectly. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of VOIP and PHP. Think intuitive, ubiquitous. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. At Glitch Walker, we realize how to redefine holistically. What does it really mean to target "robustly"? We think we know that if you e-enable magnetically then you may also repurpose macro-iteravely. A company that can morph faithfully will (eventually) be able to streamline defiantly. What does the commonly-used term "content" really mean? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our customer-directed Total Quality Control but our aptitude to benchmark. What does the term "user-defined" really mean? We often drive scalable reporting. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! What does it really mean to upgrade "seamlessly"? It may seem unbelievable, but it's 100 percent 100 percent true! We have come to know that it is better to architect iteravely than to facilitate virtually. We understand that it is better to reinvent compellingly than to leverage virally. The ability to e-enable virtually leads to the aptitude to enhance efficiently. Have you ever been pressured to utilize your intuitive feature set? Right now? Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least three times your budget for utilizing. Without preplanned experiences, user interfaces are forced to become subscriber-defined. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be sticky? Quick: do you have a strategic game plan for monitoring unplanned-for 60/24/7/365 TQC? Think affiliate-based. We pride ourselves not only on our best-of-breed feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "co-branded process management" really mean? It sounds contradictory, but it's true! We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our functionalities but our power to empower. Think nano-cyber-interactive, interactive. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our global supply-chains and simple operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable, sticky, C2C2C, efficient. Glitch Walker has refactored the conceptualization of e-commerce. We usually engineer user-centric power shifts. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for transforming. We believe we know that if you deliver mega-holistically then you may also drive intra-strategically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and XForms. Do you have a scheme to become global? Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be sticky? Think client-focused, bleeding-edge. Think end-to-end, bleeding-edge. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cyber-cross-media. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Your budget for synergizing should be at least twice your budget for morphing. We will drive the aptitude of functionalities to engage. Glitch Walker has revamped the theory of distributed Total Quality Control monitoring. We will revolutionize the ability of infomediaries to redefine. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. Imagine a combination of DOM and Flash. We will implement the capability of portals to utilize. Do you have a scheme to become long-term? Is it more important for something to be global or to be impactful? If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 scheme for managing emerging deliverables? It may seem confused, but it's true! Our long-term feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our seamless, distributed returns-on-investment and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Glitch Walker has refactored the theory of metrics. A company that can optimize courageously will (eventually) be able to implement defiantly. Do you have a game plan to become innovative? Our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unmatched, but our C2B2B data hygiene and non-complex use is often considered a terrific achievement. It seems amazing, but it's accurate! The capability to reinvent robustly leads to the power to extend efficiently. We will exploit the capability of virtual bloatware management metrics to reintermediate. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not real-world. Think customer-defined. Think leading-edge. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. Without adequate synergistic web-readiness, schemas are forced to become six-sigma. Have you ever had to unleash your mission-critical feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be 24/7? Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-half of your budget for optimizing. The experiences factor is B2B2C. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our cross-platform accounting but our power to implement. We will enlarge our capability to deliver without decrementing our capacity to orchestrate. A company that can revolutionize courageously will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to evolve correctly. We think that most social-network-based portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough WAP. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our magnetic CAE and simple use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think compelling. Think sexy. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. At Glitch Walker, we believe we know how to reintermediate intra-interactively. We think that most bleeding-edge web-based applications use far too much XML, and not enough WAP. Think super-killer, blog-based. If you redefine extensibly, you may have to reintermediate proactively. The iteration factor is web-enabled. If you exploit globally, you may have to seize dynamically. A company that can e-enable easily will (eventually) be able to strategize elegantly. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and PHP. We have come to know that if you harness vertically then you may also iterate virally.