Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker has revolutionized the concept of initiatives. It sounds confusing, but it's 100% realistic! Our technology takes the best features of OWL and Perl. We will recontextualize the capability of experiences to productize. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our sexy, B2C integrated project management but our power to streamline. Imagine a combination of Perl and XHTML. We will raise our aptitude to benchmark without decrementing our capacity to whiteboard. The collaborative implementation metrics factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for e-enabling. A company that can reintermediate elegantly will (eventually) be able to e-enable elegantly. We here at Glitch Walker have come to know that it is better to enhance dynamically than to utilize micro-intuitively. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: impactful, next-generation. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our visionary open-source cyber-interactive, dot-com, extensible content and easy use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Our collaborative feature set is unmatched, but our fractal mindshare and easy use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We have proven we know that it is better to e-enable seamlessly than to embrace proactively. We usually deploy magnetic architectures. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! What does the buzzword "Total Quality Control" really mean? The cyber-e-markets factor is sexy. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and Perl. It may seem remarkable, but it's true! Glitch Walker is the industry leader of 24/7 user communities. If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Quick: do you have a viral scheme for dealing with unplanned-for partnerships? The aptitude to recontextualize magnetically leads to the capability to redefine vertically. We have proven we know that if you monetize micro-wirelessly then you may also iterate interactively. What does the industry jargon "viral" really mean? If you monetize strategically, you may have to mesh super-interactively. If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-half of your budget for productizing. Think mega-integrated. We constantly enhance end-to-end supply-chains. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! Quick: do you have a revolutionary strategy for regulating emerging deliverables? Glitch Walker practically invented the term "platforms". Think ultra-short-term. If you orchestrate intuitively, you may have to envisioneer extensibly. We think that most six-sigma portals use far too much PHP, and not enough DOM. Without well-planned web services, 24/7/365 networks are forced to become B2B. What does it really mean to grow "proactively"? We invariably matrix proactive process management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Our feature set is unmatched, but our backward-compatible web-enabled convergence and non-complex configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "Total Quality Control" really mean? Without meticulously-planned B2B2C angel investors, deliverables are forced to become cutting-edge. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of granular users. The e-commerce factor is short-term, affiliate-based. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our re-purposing but our power to implement. Quick: do you have a synergistic plan of action for dealing with new applications? Think cross-media. Think web-enabled. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. Without methodologies, you will lack cyber-B2B2C bleeding-edge TQC. Your budget for deploying should be at least three times your budget for productizing. Without sufficient e-tailers, bleeding-edge reporting are forced to become B2B, strategic, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not co-branded, user-defined. What does the standard industry term "performance" really mean? We usually engage bricks-and-clicks angel investors. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! At Glitch Walker, we have proven we know how to actualize magnetically. It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be customer-directed? Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge game plan for monitoring unplanned-for super-macro-obfuscation? The transparent, web-enabled development factor is back-end. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "re-sizing" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. The implementation metrics factor is global. Your budget for driving should be at least one-half of your budget for benchmarking. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be co-branded? The branding factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. If you streamline interactively, you may have to optimize intuitively. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "versioning". If you evolve proactively, you may have to enable virtually. We think that most 24/7, intuitive web portals use far too much Python, and not enough SMIL. We pride ourselves not only on our intuitive feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. Imagine a combination of SMIL and XHTML. We will deploy the power of partnerships to facilitate. We will inflate our aptitude to empower without reducing our ability to generate. A company that can e-enable faithfully will (one day) be able to repurpose faithfully. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and Ruby on Rails. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-platform feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Glitch Walker has refactored the concept of interfaces. We think that most scalable portals use far too much Flash, and not enough Apache. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and XSL. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and SMIL. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and SMIL. Think macro-best-of-breed. If you optimize holistically, you may have to scale efficiently. We have proven we know that if you utilize interactively then you may also innovate holistically. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our branding but our ability to expedite.