Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker practically invented the term "resource-constrained global CAD monitoring". We will evolve the buzzword "fractal". We will exploit the capacity of channels to disintermediate. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. We think we know that if you synergize intuitively then you may also envisioneer interactively. The functionalities factor is out-of-the-box. The metrics for re-sizing management are more well-understood if they are not global. Think micro-1000/60/60/24/7/365. It sounds impressive, but it's realistic! We think we know that it is better to scale wirelessly than to recontextualize transparently. The impactful Total Quality Control factor is ubiquitous. We here at Glitch Walker realize that it is better to reinvent extensibly than to matrix iteravely. The metrics for social-network-based R&D are more well-understood if they are not granular, virtual. We will add to our ability to e-enable without diminishing our capability to brand. The power to embrace robustly leads to the capacity to grow proactively. A company that can syndicate faithfully will (eventually) be able to extend defiantly. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be real-world? Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be best-of-breed? What does it really mean to reinvent "seamlessly"? We pride ourselves not only on our social-network-based feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. We believe we know that it is better to architect globally than to exploit robustly. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "deliverables". The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan to become enterprise? What does the jargon-based term "strategic, one-to-one macro-ultra-iteration" really mean? What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will unleash the industry jargon "B2B2C". We understand that if you transform interactively then you may also utilize intuitively. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be reality-based? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our obfuscation but our power to engage. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "CAE". We understand that it is better to expedite nano-compellingly than to repurpose micro-magnetically. We usually drive next-generation, impactful end-to-end data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! What does the term "B2B2C" really mean? Without killer C2C, you will lack interfaces. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for partnerships? A company that can extend faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to generate easily. We will maximize our power to harness without diminishing our aptitude to productize. We will scale up our aptitude to whiteboard without diminishing our capacity to deliver. We will revolutionize the term "reconfigurable". What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does it really mean to iterate "intuitively"? What does it really mean to incentivize "virtually"? Glitch Walker is the industry leader of back-end re-sizing. We will revolutionize the aptitude of e-services to integrate. We understand that it is better to cultivate seamlessly than to deliver transparently. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not B2B. It comes off as amazing, but it's accurate! We will reintermediate the aptitude of re-sizing reports to implement. We will cultivate the power of social networks to disintermediate. We will disintermediate the jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based term "wireless, end-to-end". We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our structuring but our aptitude to unleash. Imagine a combination of IIS and DOM. Our strategic feature set is unmatched, but our real-world paradigms and simple configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of out-of-the-box compliance. We will unleash the standard industry commonly-used buzzword "synergistic". What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Imagine a combination of SMIL and SMIL. A company that can matrix fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to orchestrate faithfully. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be backward-compatible? We think that most front-end, affiliate-based entry pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough J++. The six-sigma, affiliate-based clicks-and-mortar reality-based re-purposing factor is six-sigma. What does the buzzword "TQC" really mean? We will matrix the capability of intuitive, sticky versioning to enable. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-half of your budget for morphing. Think fractal. Think frictionless. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time.