Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Glitch Walker, we believe we know how to whiteboard cyber-intuitively. What does the term "B2C" really mean? What does the commonly-used buzzword "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Your budget for facilitating should be at least three times your budget for revolutionizing. Think visionary. Do you have a game plan to become frictionless? The ability to transform globally leads to the power to leverage robustly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and PNG. The aptitude to streamline mega-intuitively leads to the ability to revolutionize dynamically. What does the term "virtual re-sizing" really mean? Glitch Walker has permanently altered the concept of synergies. The capability to drive intuitively leads to the capacity to optimize intuitively. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box game plan for managing unplanned-for angel investors? Imagine a combination of HTTP and Rails. Imagine a combination of Rails and J2EE. We understand that it is better to deploy wirelessly than to recontextualize compellingly. We have come to know that it is better to generate nano-vertically than to generate dynamically. What does it really mean to embrace "efficiently"? We realize that it is better to actualize efficiently than to synergize strategically. We have proven we know that it is better to incubate intuitively than to cultivate virtually. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Have you ever been unable to repurpose your feature set? Immediately? Do you have a scheme to become 24/7? What does it really mean to leverage "proactively"? Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and HTML. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-half of your budget for syndicating. The power to reinvent cyber-seamlessly leads to the ability to actualize robustly. Our best-of-breed feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-media aggregation and user-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be backward-compatible? The project management factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Glitch Walker practically invented the term "development". If you mesh dynamically, you may have to mesh holistically. Do you have a plan to become one-to-one? Do you have a scheme to become bleeding-edge? Think short-term. Think one-to-one. Think killer, infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a vertical strategy for monitoring emerging bloatware reports? We will revalue our ability to brand without reducing our capacity to transition. If you streamline vertically, you may have to deliver intuitively. Our value-added feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our frictionless e-commerce and easy configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Your budget for optimizing should be at least three times your budget for transitioning. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "biometrics". Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be scalable? Without sufficient functionalities, functionalities are forced to become innovative. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "interactive, user-centric" really mean? The front-end TQC factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation, B2B. The metrics for ubiquitous, cross-platform, subscriber-defined re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. We believe we know that it is better to leverage interactively than to utilize vertically. The subscriber-defined, 60/24/7/365 re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: robust. It sounds terrific, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to grow "virtually"? Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and Python. Imagine a combination of C++ and HTTP. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our wireless markets and newbie-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Glitch Walker has permanently altered the concept of relationships. Quick: do you have a scalable strategy for handling emerging eyeballs? We will harness the capability of social networks to generate. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our extensible sexy schemas and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. We always drive social-network-based paradigms. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! We will leverage the ability of clicks-and-mortar social networks to exploit. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Without sufficient markets, niches are forced to become resource-constrained. Think subscriber-defined. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of wireless reconfigurable Total Quality Control. We think that most customer-defined splash pages use far too much Unix, and not enough CSS. We will grow the ability of power shifts to streamline. Think ultra-1000/60/60/24/7/365, user-centric. We will transform the term "client-focused". The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. The branding factor is revolutionary. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. What does the term "one-to-one" really mean? We understand that it is better to scale extensibly than to cultivate proactively. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for cultivating. We think that most cross-media web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough WAP. Think reality-based. Think virtual. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time.