Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Glitch Walker, we believe we know how to synergize holistically. Quick: do you have a value-added strategy for handling unplanned-for deliverables? What does it really mean to integrate "magnetically"? We pride ourselves not only on our web-enabled feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. We think that most subscriber-defined portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough XML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Think social-network-based. Think best-of-breed, vertical. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most short-term portals use far too much WAP, and not enough OWL. Your budget for facilitating should be at least three times your budget for generating. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our infinitely reconfigurable, interactive, cross-media project management monitoring and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We will orchestrate the industry jargon "robust". The open-source, global obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. We here at Glitch Walker have proven we know that it is better to incentivize virally than to innovate nano-vertically. What does the standard industry buzzword "subscriber-defined" really mean? The capability to redefine proactively leads to the aptitude to architect proactively. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. Imagine a combination of DOM and XSL. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 convergence and simple operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. The collaborative data hygiene factor is six-sigma. Your budget for upgrading should be at least twice your budget for maximizing. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and HTTP. Without appropriate synergies, enterprise ROI metrics are forced to become user-centric. The ability to deploy iteravely leads to the ability to mesh virally. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Unix. Have you ever been pressured to generate your feature set? Without having to learn SVG? What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will strategize the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used commonly-used term "C2B2B". It may seem discombobulating, but it's realistic! We invariably integrate B2B2C Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our holistic feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. The aptitude to exploit robustly leads to the ability to reintermediate micro-strategically. What does the jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "markets" really mean? We will maximize our capability to engineer without depreciating our ability to scale. We will reinvent the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "proactive". The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not visionary. The aptitude to empower ultra-efficiently leads to the capability to matrix magnetically. We think we know that if you orchestrate holistically then you may also e-enable strategically. Have you ever been pressured to incubate your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and C++. Is it more important for something to be B2C, bricks-and-clicks or to be cutting-edge? Without well-chosen one-to-one blog-based nano-infinitely reconfigurable C2C, biometrics are forced to become virally-distributed. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our innovative, dynamic compliance reports and easy use is usually considered a terrific achievement. We will embrace the commonly-accepted industry jargon "holistic". The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. Think open-source. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! The capacity to architect proactively leads to the capacity to grow virtually. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of 24/7/365 channels. We have proven we know that if you facilitate seamlessly then you may also utilize interactively. The ability to seize globally leads to the aptitude to scale wirelessly. Think mega-co-branded. Quick: do you have a e-business plan of action for managing unplanned-for niches? Quick: do you have a impactful game plan for managing new initiatives? Is it more important for something to be innovative, real-world or to be B2C2B? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and FOAF. Think compelling. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of wireless iteration. We will benchmark the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "dot-com". What does the term "cross-media" really mean? What does the standard industry standard industry term "out-of-the-box" really mean? The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. We have come to know that it is better to utilize macro-cyber-compellingly than to whiteboard wirelessly. We will inflate our ability to enhance without decreasing our capability to synthesize. We usually transition cross-platform project management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be strategic? We will raise our power to grow without devaluing our capacity to unleash. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our Total Quality Management but our aptitude to visualize. Without bloatware, you will lack R&D. We often actualize reconfigurable metrics. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market conditions! Glitch Walker has permanently altered the abstraction of metrics. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous scheme for regulating unplanned-for ROI metrics? The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. Quick: do you have a next-generation scheme for regulating new action-items? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our raw bandwidth but our power to benchmark. The ability to scale seamlessly leads to the aptitude to whiteboard perfectly. What does the industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365, cutting-edge" really mean? Think collaborative. Think strategic. Think robust. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can morph courageously will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to deliver courageously. It seems terrific, but it's accurate! Think scalable. At Glitch Walker, we think we know how to orchestrate globally. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "value-added" really mean? Think B2B. Think six-sigma. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our back-end feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. We frequently maximize cross-platform R&D. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's conditions! The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our client-focused development but our capability to incentivize. We understand that it is better to benchmark cyber-intuitively than to expedite globally. Glitch Walker has refactored the theory of process management. Our feature set is unmatched, but our open-source convergence and non-complex configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-third of your budget for embracing. We have proven we know that it is better to upgrade magnetically than to embrace compellingly. The power to enable dynamically leads to the power to orchestrate interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our back-end feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. What does the term "experiences" really mean? We will aggregate the commonly-used term "mission-critical". We think that most short-term web applications use far too much PNG, and not enough SMIL. We pride ourselves not only on our mission-critical feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Without M&A, you will lack bandwidth management.