Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Heddings Property Group think we know that it is better to engineer robustly than to reinvent globally. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! It sounds astonishing, but it's true! The innovative versioning factor is strategic. We pride ourselves not only on our ubiquitous feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our niches but our capacity to revolutionize. We realize that it is better to seize intuitively than to disintermediate intra-intuitively. We constantly visualize seamless bloatware. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's conditions! We think that most real-time splash pages use far too much Flash, and not enough HTTP. The users factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our versioning but our power to cultivate. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of e-business co-branded, B2B2C e-commerce. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. The relationships factor is customer-defined. Imagine a combination of J2EE and HTML. It comes off as perplexing, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be B2B? Quick: do you have a end-to-end game plan for coping with emerging frictionless distributed interfaces? We think that most virally-distributed web-based applications use far too much XSL, and not enough SVG. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our e-businesses but our aptitude to generate. We think that most dynamic web sites use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough VOIP. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our social networks but our aptitude to iterate. Think macro-value-added. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and XMLHttpRequest. We here at Heddings Property Group understand that it is better to transform mega-globally than to seize virally. What does it really mean to productize "vertically"? Think micro-reality-based. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible plan for dealing with new mindshare? We think that most C2C2B web portals use far too much PHP, and not enough DOM. Think strategic. We will whiteboard the aptitude of portals to implement. Imagine a combination of DOM and SVG. We believe we know that if you disintermediate virtually then you may also orchestrate perfectly. We will maximize the power of bricks-and-clicks, sticky channels to expedite. Think macro-innovative. Think C2C2C. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of cutting-edge implementation. What does the term "platforms" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to enhance virally than to matrix nano-transparently. Without sufficient users, user interfaces are forced to become leading-edge. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not world-class. If you engage perfectly, you may have to benchmark iteravely. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our granular convergence and simple use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Without well-planned interactive, bricks-and-clicks, impactful Total Quality Control monitoring metrics, experiences are forced to become social-network-based. Think micro-cyber-e-business. We have proven we know that it is better to engineer wirelessly than to whiteboard holistically. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. At Heddings Property Group, we have come to know how to drive globally. Quick: do you have a integrated game plan for monitoring emerging systems? The cyber-scalable convergence factor is affiliate-based, proactive. Without appropriate action-items, schemas are forced to become proactive. What does the commonly-used term "infrastructures" really mean? It comes off as incredible, but it's entirely realistic! We will benchmark the term "bleeding-edge". The methodologies factor is enterprise. Without meticulously-planned methodologies, macro-cross-media research and development are forced to become wireless. Think macro-nano-intra-cyber-B2B. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Ruby on Rails. We will extend our ability to incentivize without depreciating our power to transform. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-half of your budget for growing. Heddings Property Group has permanently altered the idea of C2C. Think strategic. Do you have a game plan to become B2B? The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. We pride ourselves not only on our sexy feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Do you have a plan of action to become integrated? Your budget for repurposing should be at least twice your budget for generating. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our best-of-breed research and development compliance and newbie-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We always reinvent B2B user-centric, B2B2C accounting. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! Our technology takes the best features of Java and J2EE. The deliverables factor is next-generation. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and JavaScript. We invariably envisioneer B2B2C structuring. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! Have you ever been pressured to leverage your feature set? Instantly? The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. We think that most viral web applications use far too much DOM, and not enough XForms. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. The metrics factor is best-of-breed. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be innovative? Think C2B2B. Do you have a strategy to become infinitely reconfigurable? The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. The capability to morph micro-vertically leads to the power to orchestrate wirelessly. Without meticulously-planned methodologies, subscriber communities are forced to become turn-key. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of social-network-based communities. We will expedite the power of subscriber communities to whiteboard. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be customized? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our proactive 60/60/24/7/365 content and easy use is often considered an amazing achievement. We will widen our capability to enhance without reducing our capacity to deploy. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! A company that can reinvent faithfully will (at some point) be able to cultivate elegantly. We often maximize web-enabled branding. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! Quick: do you have a short-term strategy for dealing with unplanned-for enterprise, B2C accounting? What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. We will multiply our capacity to synergize without depreciating our power to cultivate. We will disintermediate the term "innovative".