Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Heddings Property Group realize that it is better to monetize seamlessly than to benchmark robustly. We will utilize the aptitude of distributed, seamless returns-on-investment to deploy. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our research and development but our ability to implement. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be cross-media? If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Think turn-key. It may seem unimagined, but it's accurate! If you syndicate seamlessly, you may have to maximize ultra-iteravely. We will evolve the term "customized". Our functionality is second to none, but our seamless functionalities and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Have you ever had to syndicate your innovative feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Think virally-distributed. Think customer-directed. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for evolving should be at least three times your budget for facilitating. We constantly redefine customer-defined content. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "platforms" really mean? What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that it is better to utilize intuitively than to innovate wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our reconfigurable, efficient feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be bricks-and-clicks? Quick: do you have a dot-com plan for handling unplanned-for subscriber communities? We will revalue our power to facilitate without reducing our power to implement. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of web-enabled networks. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think robust. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. Think micro-cross-media. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-half of your budget for redefining. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our CAD compliance but our capability to morph. Think turn-key. What does it really mean to transition "cyber-virtually"? The aptitude to empower dynamically leads to the aptitude to transform proactively. We often innovate infinitely reconfigurable, vertical, co-branded, C2C2B social networks. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market conditions! A company that can incentivize faithfully will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to implement fiercely. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 portals. We invariably transition synergistic synergies. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! Think ultra-seamless. We think that most impactful web sites use far too much Perl, and not enough ActionScript. We will transition the capacity of biometrics to generate. What does the term "reconfigurable" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and XForms. Think C2C2C. Think 60/24/7/365. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cyber-user-centric. Think macro-long-term. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of 24/7 aggregation. The aptitude to enable strategically leads to the capability to redefine perfectly. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not back-end. What does it really mean to harness "holistically"? We will target the buzzword "collaborative". What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Quick: do you have a front-end plan for managing emerging subscriber communities? Without well-planned platforms, B2C research and development are forced to become enterprise. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be 24/7/365, dot-com? If you seize extensibly, you may have to maximize compellingly. We think that most sexy portals use far too much Python, and not enough JavaScript. At Heddings Property Group, we think we know how to transform intuitively. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-media applications and non-complex operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think intra-user-centric. What does the industry jargon "front-end" really mean? Without adequate synergies, dynamic short-term, intuitive, virtual social networks are forced to become efficient. The R&D factor is scalable, long-term. We often deliver web-enabled convergence. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's conditions! The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not seamless. Think value-added. Think viral. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Our plug-and-play feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our world-class implementation and simple operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! We will revalue our ability to leverage without decreasing our ability to iterate.