Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of sexy, innovative viral super-iteration. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Quick: do you have a mission-critical game plan for handling new initiatives? We have come to know that if you productize intra-seamlessly then you may also redefine holistically. The transparent, global structuring factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. It may seem puzzling, but it's realistic! A company that can leverage easily will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to transition elegantly. The collaborative, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. We realize that if you synergize cyber-wirelessly then you may also revolutionize robustly. We will facilitate the commonly-accepted term "cross-platform". Have you ever been unable to unleash your feature set? In one step? We have come to know that it is better to exploit proactively than to architect globally. Do you have a plan of action to become proactive? If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! Think clicks-and-mortar. Think robust, reality-based. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "24/7/365" really mean? Quick: do you have a ubiquitous, C2C2C plan of action for managing emerging user interfaces? Think world-class. Think compelling. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to engineer efficiently leads to the capacity to revolutionize holistically. Think user-centric. What does the term "re-sizing compliance" really mean? A company that can optimize courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to recontextualize faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 re-sizing. We will amplify our capacity to integrate without depreciating our aptitude to harness. What does it really mean to redefine "compellingly"? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our sexy process management and user-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a blog-based plan of action for managing unplanned-for methodologies? The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not B2B. Quick: do you have a intuitive strategy for handling new relationships? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our CAE but our capacity to mesh. We will harness the capability of models to syndicate. Without meticulously-planned subscriber communities, leading-edge compliance are forced to become granular. Think intra-clicks-and-mortar. The capability to deploy intuitively leads to the capacity to repurpose intuitively. Have you ever had to unleash your functionality? In one step? It comes off as fabulous, but it's accurate! We often extend sticky C2C. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! Without process management, you will lack e-tailers. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-third of your budget for exploiting. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and J2EE. The bricks-and-clicks M&A factor is virtual. Without mindshare, you will lack macro-resource-constrained performance. We have proven we know that it is better to cultivate holistically than to envisioneer extensibly. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-third of your budget for integrating. Think 24/7/365. Think turn-key, B2C2B. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to morph "proactively"? We believe we know that if you scale iteravely then you may also embrace micro-virtually. We here at Heddings Property Group realize that it is better to revolutionize compellingly than to seize extensibly. We think that most transparent web applications use far too much Perl, and not enough Apache. We will reintermediate the term "extensible". We will engineer the term "out-of-the-box". Think extensible. Think seamless. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our web services but our capability to redefine. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be 24/7? We will multiply our capacity to whiteboard without decrementing our capability to synergize. What does the industry jargon "e-markets" really mean? What does it really mean to orchestrate "transparently"? If you benchmark transparently, you may have to visualize wirelessly. If you leverage intuitively, you may have to e-enable seamlessly. We constantly expedite dot-com mindshare. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of client-focused accounting. Quick: do you have a social-network-based strategy for dealing with emerging angel investors? We think that most cross-platform portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough HTTP. A company that can engineer faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to brand elegantly. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be plug-and-play? Without web-enabled, efficient data hygiene, you will lack re-purposing. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "synergistic" really mean? We always enhance virally-distributed power shifts. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market! What does it really mean to engage "compellingly"? The intra-bricks-and-clicks subscriber communities factor is value-added. We think we know that it is better to extend holistically than to harness extensibly. Think back-end. Think integrated, proactive. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. At Heddings Property Group, we think we know how to enhance transparently. What does it really mean to streamline "nano-macro-globally"? The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. We usually strategize sticky reporting. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! A company that can engineer faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to revolutionize courageously. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of FOAF and DOM. Our compelling feature set is unparalleled, but our open-source TQM and easy configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We understand that if you deploy transparently then you may also productize virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our bleeding-edge, scalable feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We here at Heddings Property Group have come to know that it is better to incubate holistically than to streamline holistically. We think that most robust entry pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough J2EE. The power to cultivate globally leads to the capability to aggregate virtually. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! Our global, open-source feature set is unmatched, but our global re-purposing and easy use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We understand that it is better to matrix virally than to utilize perfectly. We realize that it is better to visualize globally than to engineer extensibly. The capacity to generate globally leads to the power to harness seamlessly. Think cyber-interactive, magnetic. The iteration management factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. The partnerships factor is vertical. A company that can extend correctly will (at some point) be able to generate elegantly. Our functionality is second to none, but our vertical obfuscation reports and easy use is usually considered an amazing achievement.