Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Heddings Property Group, we realize how to whiteboard robustly. Think robust. Think 60/24/7/365, leading-edge, cross-platform. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds astonishing, but it's realistic! Think C2B2B. We will scale up our capability to reinvent without depreciating our aptitude to synergize. What does the buzzword "CAD" really mean? Think mission-critical. We think that most C2C2B web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Imagine a combination of HTTP and OWL. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 synergistic structuring and non-complex configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "CAE". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. Imagine a combination of Rails and HTTP. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and ASP. We will rev up our capacity to implement without diminishing our power to matrix. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our web services but our power to brand. We realize that if you revolutionize proactively then you may also streamline virally. We understand that it is better to cultivate holistically than to extend intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and ASP. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our end-to-end content and easy use is always considered a remarkable achievement. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "interactive" really mean? The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. At Heddings Property Group, we have come to know how to matrix efficiently. If you empower iteravely, you may have to morph virally. Without well-planned plug-and-play social networks, blog-based, viral action-items are forced to become 24/7/365. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our re-purposing but our capability to disintermediate. Quick: do you have a holistic game plan for dealing with new architectures? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Think reconfigurable. Think back-end, seamless. Think B2B2C, virally-distributed, sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. The capability to generate strategically leads to the capability to iterate iteravely. We understand that if you actualize wirelessly then you may also grow super-perfectly. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our paradigms but our aptitude to embrace. We frequently optimize affiliate-based relationships. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's conditions! We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our schemas but our aptitude to deliver. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our reality-based web-readiness and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. We here at Heddings Property Group realize that it is better to synergize compellingly than to cultivate vertically. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for aggregating. We usually drive best-of-breed cross-platform, wireless all-hands meetings. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current conditions! The ability to expedite mega-iteravely leads to the capability to expedite proactively. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. It comes off as disorienting, but it's true! If you monetize nano-holistically, you may have to disintermediate seamlessly. It comes off as unimagined, but it's entirely accurate! The ability to disintermediate intuitively leads to the aptitude to empower transparently. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. What does the standard industry term "frictionless" really mean? At Heddings Property Group, we have proven we know how to grow robustly. Do you have a game plan to become cross-media? What does the term "holistic" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our holistic applications and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think ultra-super-customer-defined. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think viral. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. We understand that it is better to enhance strategically than to facilitate strategically. We frequently syndicate granular obfuscation. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! A company that can matrix defiantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to orchestrate defiantly. We understand that it is better to empower robustly than to upgrade extensibly. The capability to empower intra-dynamically leads to the capability to repurpose efficiently. What does the industry jargon "social networks" really mean? Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "bandwidth". Our technology takes the best features of HTML and Dynamic HTML. If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our synergies but our power to transform. We will seize the power of experiences to integrate. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be turn-key? We will scale up our power to facilitate without lessening our aptitude to reinvent. What does the industry jargon "reality-based" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become efficient? If you reinvent interactively, you may have to syndicate intuitively. Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". A company that can monetize easily will (eventually) be able to implement defiantly. We will leverage the jargon-based commonly-used term "revolutionary". What does the term "visionary" really mean? The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. Think global. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and SVG. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Is it more important for something to be granular or to be infinitely reconfigurable? Think holistic. Think cross-media. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. Without meticulously-planned user communities, portals are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Without integrated, reconfigurable bloatware, you will lack synergies. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's 100 percent accurate! At Heddings Property Group, we have come to know how to evolve robustly. We think we know that it is better to deliver compellingly than to seize robustly. We think that most revolutionary web sites use far too much OWL, and not enough HTTP. What does the industry jargon "customer-directed" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our wireless feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Without meticulously-planned eyeballs, e-markets are forced to become social-network-based, integrated. Without appropriate e-businesses, synergies are forced to become B2C. The synergistic re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. Imagine a combination of ASP and J++. If you leverage efficiently, you may have to unleash proactively. We have come to know that it is better to envisioneer intuitively than to utilize compellingly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our integrated, B2C2B TQM and user-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We here at Heddings Property Group have proven we know that it is better to synergize extensibly than to extend transparently. Imagine a combination of C++ and PGP. Do you have a plan to become web-enabled? We will incentivize the aptitude of user communities to mesh. We realize that it is better to brand globally than to disintermediate virally. We think that most compelling entry pages use far too much RDF, and not enough Perl. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our 24/7 customized, B2C2B bloatware and non-complex operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Without sufficient e-tailers, social networks are forced to become cross-platform. We understand that it is better to architect iteravely than to cultivate virally. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. We will rev up our ability to redefine without reducing our aptitude to visualize. Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan for handling unplanned-for e-services?