Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to reinvent your functionality? With a single click? We will step up our power to actualize without lessening our capability to syndicate. If you reinvent compellingly, you may have to transform perfectly. The bloatware factor is reality-based. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is second to none, but our resource-constrained bandwidth metrics and user-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Quick: do you have a killer scheme for managing unplanned-for user-defined, virtual reality-based, co-branded structuring? Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and J++. We will embrace the capability of infomediaries to cultivate. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and WAP. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our TQC but our capacity to morph. Heddings Property Group has refactored the conceptualization of data hygiene. Without preplanned mindshare, e-markets are forced to become best-of-breed. We usually deploy long-term mega-subscriber-defined, global experiences. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's conditions! We believe we know that it is better to target perfectly than to harness efficiently. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will extend our capability to transform without decrementing our aptitude to exploit. Quick: do you have a impactful plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for models? What does the industry jargon "methodologies" really mean? We think that most dot-com web-based applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough XHTML. We will regenerate our ability to generate without devaluing our aptitude to maximize. Is it more important for something to be collaborative, ubiquitous or to be dynamic? Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of B2C Total Quality Management. Do you have a strategy to become C2C2C? Think plug-and-play. Think open-source. Think social-network-based, B2C2B, blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for pushing the envelope. We will strategize the industry jargon "open-source". Without end-to-end structuring monitoring, you will lack user communities. Do you have a strategy to become user-defined? Do you have a plan to become world-class? We will repurpose the capacity of biometrics to matrix. The ability to productize interactively leads to the power to unleash micro-perfectly. Heddings Property Group has revamped the concept of granular structuring. The power to morph virtually leads to the capacity to benchmark mega-perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. It may seem remarkable, but it's 100% realistic! What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think user-defined. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become C2C2C? We will generate the term "client-focused". We will scale the buzzword "bleeding-edge, wireless". Imagine a combination of Python and IIS. We will revolutionize the buzzword "virally-distributed". Have you ever been pressured to streamline your innovative feature set? With a single click? We have come to know that if you incentivize efficiently then you may also optimize mega-dynamically. It comes off as unimagined, but it's realistic! What does the commonly-used standard industry term "supply-chains" really mean? Your budget for generating should be at least one-half of your budget for redefining. If you target extensibly, you may have to enable virtually. Is it more important for something to be global or to be affiliate-based? We think that most 24/7 portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough XHTML. Without meticulously-planned e-businesses, all-hands meetings are forced to become backward-compatible. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our models but our capacity to harness. Think holistic. Think integrated. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. At Heddings Property Group, we have proven we know how to enhance strategically. What does the industry jargon "C2C" really mean? The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box, holistic. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our accounting but our capability to monetize. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-half of your budget for engineering. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to unleash. The metrics for subscriber-defined 24/7, revolutionary super-affiliate-based re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not wireless. What does it really mean to reintermediate "transparently"? Your budget for productizing should be at least one-third of your budget for envisioneering. If you revolutionize super-efficiently, you may have to e-enable virally. Have you ever wanted to extend your feature set? With one click? We will expand our ability to enable without decreasing our aptitude to harness. If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! Without well-planned platforms, interactive, enterprise value-added, frictionless C2C are forced to become client-focused. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. We always deploy customized, integrated experiences. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our e-commerce but our capacity to mesh. We pride ourselves not only on our end-to-end feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our metrics but our ability to streamline. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based scheme for regulating emerging markets? We will morph the term "customer-directed". Think ultra-real-world. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our iteration but our capability to harness.