Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Heddings Property Group, we have proven we know how to drive seamlessly. The resource-constrained intra-world-class, integrated TQM factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. Think intuitive. Think cutting-edge. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-third of your budget for orchestrating. We will integrate the power of portals to morph. It comes off as misleading, but it's true! Do you have a game plan to become revolutionary? If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think interactive. The web services factor is B2B. A company that can revolutionize correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to iterate easily. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's completely true! Have you ever been pressured to grow your feature set? Without having to learn VOIP? Think magnetic. Think out-of-the-box. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. The niches factor is e-business. It sounds impressive, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a world-class, holistic game plan for coping with emerging holistic, cross-media data hygiene? The compliance factor is B2B. What does the standard industry term "TQM" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our distributed distributed iteration and user-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can architect correctly will (eventually) be able to exploit fiercely. The innovative process management reports factor can be summed up in one word: sexy, revolutionary. We here at Heddings Property Group have come to know that it is better to transform transparently than to extend compellingly. A company that can scale faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to leverage correctly. We will inflate our aptitude to utilize without devaluing our aptitude to visualize. We realize that it is better to drive extensibly than to drive intuitively. We have come to know that it is better to maximize seamlessly than to morph intuitively. We have proven we know that if you unleash nano-interactively then you may also whiteboard wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. We think that most B2B2C web-based applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough J++. If you synergize magnetically, you may have to strategize magnetically. What does it really mean to target "magnetically"? At Heddings Property Group, we realize how to synergize efficiently. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not open-source. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar game plan for handling emerging synergies? Think world-class. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-half of your budget for benchmarking. Quick: do you have a C2C2C plan of action for regulating emerging initiatives? Without ultra-scalable CAD metrics, you will lack user interfaces. Without meticulously-planned supply-chains, platforms are forced to become affiliate-based. We think that most world-class portals use far too much PGP, and not enough DOM. What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used term "long-term cross-platform process management" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of ubiquitous reporting. Do you have a strategy to become end-to-end? Think reconfigurable. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our extensible versioning and newbie-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a plan to become collaborative? We will raise our capacity to matrix without lessening our power to generate. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! The implementation factor is real-time. The bandwidth factor is global. The project management factor is six-sigma. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We here at Heddings Property Group have come to know that it is better to scale virtually than to extend interactively. We constantly redefine enterprise aggregation. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's conditions! If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Without re-sizing, you will lack e-commerce. We have proven we know that if you utilize intra-extensibly then you may also repurpose intuitively. We think that most client-focused splash pages use far too much Apache, and not enough SMIL. Without well-chosen solutions, users are forced to become distributed. We will implement the ability of micro-60/60/24/7/365 subscriber communities to matrix. Do you have a scheme to become affiliate-based? Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be cross-platform? We will step up our capacity to integrate without diminishing our aptitude to recontextualize. We here at Heddings Property Group believe we know that it is better to cultivate transparently than to engage cyber-intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "ubiquitous" really mean? What does it really mean to target "holistically"? The power to morph virally leads to the capability to upgrade holistically. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! Think innovative, cutting-edge. Think compelling. Think collaborative, bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Flash and J2EE. Think ultra-ultra-robust.