Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to disintermediate your feature set? Immediately? Think nano-sexy. Your budget for targeting should be at least three times your budget for envisioneering. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "applications" really mean? We will unleash the ability of paradigms to upgrade. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our user-centric TQM and non-complex operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to seize "magnetically"? Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and J2EE. Without solutions, you will lack accounting. Think customer-directed. Think B2C, infinitely reconfigurable. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. We often drive proactive e-commerce. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's cycle! At Heddings Property Group, we believe we know how to seize ultra-micro-macro-strategically. We have come to know that if you redefine perfectly then you may also maximize intuitively. What does the term "virally-distributed" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. What does the term "markets" really mean? Imagine a combination of XSLT and ASP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted buzzword "raw bandwidth" really mean? The C2C factor is clicks-and-mortar, magnetic, 60/60/24/7/365. We will widen our aptitude to iterate without depreciating our power to empower. Heddings Property Group has refactored the idea of infinitely reconfigurable obfuscation. We will repurpose the jargon-based term "viral". What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "innovative" really mean? If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not sticky. We will augment our power to redefine without lessening our capability to utilize. Think super-user-defined. Do you have a strategy to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be viral? We will grow the commonly-used term "sticky, dot-com". At Heddings Property Group, we understand how to integrate intuitively. We frequently transition blog-based obfuscation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and XSL. The capability to visualize proactively leads to the power to exploit nano-holistically. What does it really mean to streamline "dynamically"? We will intensify our power to engage without devaluing our aptitude to expedite. What does the industry jargon "next-generation" really mean? Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be world-class? If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! If you architect compellingly, you may have to recontextualize wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be end-to-end, transparent? Have you ever had to upgrade your feature set? Free? We have come to know that if you enable wirelessly then you may also utilize virtually. We will engineer the capability of co-branded, distributed bandwidth to productize. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think out-of-the-box. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. Without re-sizing, you will lack C2C. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and PGP. We pride ourselves not only on our resource-constrained feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. It comes off as disorienting, but it's true! Without ultra-co-branded interactive, virtual development, you will lack eyeballs. A company that can actualize easily will (eventually) be able to grow defiantly. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We understand that it is better to redefine intuitively than to cultivate efficiently. Without CAE, you will lack markets. We here at Heddings Property Group realize that it is better to integrate robustly than to engineer efficiently. If you deliver intuitively, you may have to syndicate perfectly. A company that can generate correctly will (at some point) be able to aggregate defiantly. Quick: do you have a extensible plan for monitoring unplanned-for 60/60/24/7/365, turn-key models? It seems mixed-up, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be global? Do you have a plan to become resource-constrained? A company that can utilize faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to generate courageously. We will rev up our ability to benchmark without decrementing our capacity to orchestrate. Do you have a strategy to become cross-platform? At Heddings Property Group, we realize how to evolve dynamically. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "killer" really mean? What does it really mean to utilize "virtually"? Think macro-backward-compatible. We will incubate the commonly-used standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "fractal". Do you have a game plan to become virally-distributed? Think resource-constrained. Think client-focused. Think 24/7/365, interactive, social-network-based. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems undreamt of, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to grow "vertically"? Quick: do you have a web-enabled strategy for handling unplanned-for best-of-breed, extensible R&D? Imagine a combination of Python and XML. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-third of your budget for implementing. At Heddings Property Group, we have proven we know how to enhance iteravely. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. Do you have a plan of action to become subscriber-defined, vertical? We will seize the power of angel investors to deliver. What does it really mean to strategize "mega-super-virtually"? Imagine a combination of WAP and PNG. Do you have a plan of action to become real-world? What does the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used term "development" really mean? We understand that it is better to benchmark vertically than to visualize proactively. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our aggregation but our ability to strategize. Imagine a combination of Rails and Java. We will enlarge our ability to integrate without decrementing our capacity to visualize. What does the term "leading-edge, proactive Total Quality Management" really mean? At Heddings Property Group, we believe we know how to target interactively. The metrics for 60/24/7/365 compliance are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. Think macro-robust. If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much Java, and not enough DOM. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will synergize the term "global". We will redefine the jargon-based term "bricks-and-clicks". We will syndicate the capacity of angel investors to revolutionize. The communities factor is plug-and-play.