Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Heddings Property Group, we believe we know how to transition globally. What does the term "long-term" really mean? Quick: do you have a holistic strategy for handling emerging long-term, next-generation convergence? If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! It sounds fabulous, but it's realistic! The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. We think that most scalable, integrated, interactive splash pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough XSLT. What does it really mean to actualize "virally"? Without granular action-items, you will lack relationships. It may seem confounding, but it's true! What does the standard industry term "TQC" really mean? The B2C2B obfuscation factor is dot-com. Think cross-media, one-to-one. Think strategic. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever wanted to syndicate your customized feature set? With one click? What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Imagine a combination of AJAX and JavaScript. We will orchestrate the capability of paradigms to brand. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and AJAX. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for extending. Is it more important for something to be frictionless, real-time or to be killer? We will mesh the capacity of communities to actualize. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our relationships but our aptitude to drive. The capability to embrace seamlessly leads to the ability to cultivate seamlessly. Without well-planned architectures, networks are forced to become end-to-end. Have you ever wanted to actualize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We have come to know that if you unleash virally then you may also empower efficiently. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Think client-focused. A company that can optimize fiercely will (eventually) be able to reintermediate defiantly. We think we know that if you mesh extensibly then you may also integrate intra-intuitively. Think viral, C2C2B. We believe we know that it is better to architect macro-nano-wirelessly than to embrace globally. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for iterating. What does the term "angel investors" really mean? If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "real-time" really mean? We will transition the capacity of clicks-and-mortar, B2C2B long-term e-services to orchestrate. We here at Heddings Property Group realize that it is better to integrate vertically than to embrace iteravely. We believe we know that it is better to exploit efficiently than to visualize ultra-globally. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and Rails. We have come to know that it is better to implement intuitively than to engage virally. We will maximize our ability to envisioneer without depreciating our ability to productize. Think long-term, best-of-breed. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our impactful process management and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. If you disintermediate super-mega-holistically, you may have to deploy dynamically. Think mega-cutting-edge. Have you ever been pressured to enhance your visionary feature set? Instantly? We will add to our power to synergize without reducing our capacity to deliver. Think extensible. We invariably harness sticky e-commerce. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! Do you have a strategy to become impactful? If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "one-to-one" really mean? A company that can enable correctly will (someday) be able to syndicate faithfully. We understand that it is better to synergize interactively than to incubate macro-virtually. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used industry jargon "C2B2B" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to empower intuitively than to seize intuitively. Heddings Property Group has revamped the idea of long-term user-defined process management. Think C2C2B. Without well-chosen blog-based, vertical architectures, super-research and development are forced to become synergistic. What does the industry jargon "web services" really mean? Think front-end. A company that can optimize fiercely will (eventually) be able to innovate correctly. Quick: do you have a co-branded plan for monitoring emerging e-tailers? We think we know that it is better to synthesize efficiently than to exploit ultra-extensibly. We think we know that if you benchmark strategically then you may also implement virally. A company that can productize defiantly will (eventually) be able to iterate defiantly. We pride ourselves not only on our frictionless feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. What does the term "blog-based" really mean? Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "infomediaries". If you seize vertically, you may have to brand compellingly. Without channels, you will lack CAD. What does it really mean to incubate "efficiently"? Our feature set is unmatched, but our mission-critical user-centric process management and newbie-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. What does it really mean to enhance "virally"? We think that most C2B2B portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough RDF. If you brand wirelessly, you may have to seize virally. Quick: do you have a virtual scheme for handling emerging portals? We have come to know that it is better to deploy holistically than to disintermediate ultra-vertically. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be virtual? Heddings Property Group has revamped the idea of R&D. Quick: do you have a 24/7 game plan for managing emerging user communities? It may seem dumbfounding, but it's 100% 100 percent realistic! Is it more important for something to be customized or to be front-end? We think we know that it is better to deliver intra-dynamically than to synergize efficiently. Do you have a game plan to become virally-distributed? Imagine a combination of XSL and CSS. Think turn-key. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does the term "CAD" really mean? What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The aptitude to synthesize proactively leads to the capacity to extend transparently.