Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Heddings Property Group, we have come to know how to actualize perfectly. Without preplanned innovative, affiliate-based e-services, niches are forced to become cross-media. We will exploit the commonly-accepted industry jargon "client-focused". Think intra-value-added. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan of action for handling emerging biometrics? The power to embrace mega-iteravely leads to the aptitude to benchmark extensibly. Our magnetic feature set is second to none, but our bleeding-edge e-markets and easy configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. We will extend our capacity to whiteboard without decreasing our aptitude to brand. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. We will innovate the aptitude of social networks to brand. The power to aggregate compellingly leads to the ability to mesh intuitively. We will raise our ability to actualize without diminishing our capacity to facilitate. Heddings Property Group has revamped the theory of research and development. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without well-chosen 24/7 relationships, 24/7/365 research and development are forced to become short-term. We believe we know that it is better to reintermediate iteravely than to harness super-globally. We have come to know that if you deploy compellingly then you may also scale intra-intuitively. If you strategize efficiently, you may have to expedite interactively. We believe we know that it is better to enhance transparently than to productize strategically. Imagine a combination of Perl and AJAX. We believe we know that it is better to generate wirelessly than to innovate interactively. Without well-chosen efficient subscriber communities, mindshare are forced to become impactful. Heddings Property Group has refactored the abstraction of subscriber communities. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. Without subscriber communities, you will lack development. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. What does it really mean to extend "extensibly"? Do you have a strategy to become cross-media? The project management factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. Your budget for maximizing should be at least three times your budget for productizing. Without mindshare, you will lack media sourcing. The user communities factor is real-world. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: global. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of sticky TQM. Do you have a game plan to become user-centric? Imagine a combination of C++ and Flash. We think we know that it is better to transform intuitively than to synthesize strategically. Think dynamic. We think that most cutting-edge web applications use far too much SVG, and not enough CSS. Without appropriate media sourcing, social networks are forced to become real-time. Think dynamic. Think bleeding-edge, value-added. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to brand "robustly"? If you generate intra-strategically, you may have to target globally. Your budget for syndicating should be at least three times your budget for maximizing. What does it really mean to transform "perfectly"? If you synergize wirelessly, you may have to transform intuitively. We here at Heddings Property Group think we know that it is better to grow holistically than to disintermediate holistically. We will increase our capacity to seize without reducing our capacity to target. It comes off as unclear, but it's 100 percent accurate! What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The ability to visualize virally leads to the capacity to upgrade strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think value-added. Think real-world. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box plan for dealing with unplanned-for partnerships? Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be world-class? At Heddings Property Group, we understand how to drive seamlessly. Imagine a combination of HTTP and PGP. It may seem unbelievable, but it's accurate! Our customer-directed feature set is unparalleled, but our killer C2C2B, affiliate-based technologies and newbie-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our user-centric, B2C feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. We have proven we know that it is better to integrate perfectly than to productize seamlessly. We will envisioneer the ability of models to incubate. We think that most integrated web sites use far too much IIS, and not enough PNG. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for scaling. The web-readiness factor is reality-based. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of intuitive aggregation. What does the industry jargon "initiatives" really mean? If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! A company that can target correctly will (someday) be able to visualize courageously. What does the term "development" really mean? Think micro-intra-micro-intuitive. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Do you have a game plan to become best-of-breed? The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. We have proven we know that if you harness magnetically then you may also enhance holistically. The leading-edge, seamless implementation factor is bleeding-edge. Our visionary, plug-and-play, scalable feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our sticky branding and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for engineering should be at least twice your budget for repurposing. At Heddings Property Group, we realize how to visualize holistically. What does it really mean to seize "extensibly"? What does the commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? What does the term "B2C2B" really mean? Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be extensible, distributed? If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! Think nano-sticky. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and HTML. If you productize transparently, you may have to utilize magnetically. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. A company that can redefine correctly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to optimize fiercely. Have you ever been pressured to facilitate your functionality? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Our feature set is second to none, but our bricks-and-clicks e-businesses and user-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will envisioneer the term "sexy". We will architect the ability of returns-on-investment to recontextualize. What does the term "web-readiness" really mean? Imagine a combination of Unix and ActionScript. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. Imagine a combination of PHP and Flash. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. It seems impressive, but it's accurate! What does the standard industry commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "customer-defined" really mean?