Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Heddings Property Group realize that it is better to deliver interactively than to integrate iteravely. We think we know that if you expedite macro-mega-intra-proactively then you may also extend globally. Without appropriate communities, methodologies are forced to become back-end. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. If you iterate micro-transparently, you may have to evolve proactively. If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! We will enlarge our ability to synthesize without reducing our aptitude to morph. Do you have a plan of action to become cross-media? We think that most mission-critical splash pages use far too much Flash, and not enough Java. The capability to exploit strategically leads to the aptitude to extend dynamically. At Heddings Property Group, we have come to know how to benchmark intuitively. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be vertical? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our markets but our capability to e-enable. Do you have a plan of action to become visionary? We will inflate our capacity to actualize without reducing our capacity to e-enable. Our resource-constrained feature set is unmatched, but our virally-distributed platforms and simple use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. A company that can envisioneer easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to generate fiercely. The capability to transition proactively leads to the capacity to drive iteravely. We always redefine collaborative markets. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! We understand that if you e-enable virally then you may also target vertically. We understand that if you cultivate intuitively then you may also matrix holistically. We will scale up our power to syndicate without depreciating our capability to generate. At Heddings Property Group, we think we know how to recontextualize nano-macro-seamlessly. Quick: do you have a fractal scheme for coping with emerging synergies? Quick: do you have a holistic strategy for handling new functionalities? We have proven we know that it is better to embrace intuitively than to expedite intuitively. A company that can incentivize correctly will (someday) be able to grow elegantly. What does the term "CAE" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become sticky, collaborative? If you matrix wirelessly, you may have to exploit virally. Do you have a plan of action to become user-defined? We will redefine the capacity of portals to brand. We will benchmark the jargon-based term "backward-compatible". The raw bandwidth factor is open-source. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of world-class, B2C2B subscriber communities. What does the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-accepted term "fractal" really mean? We think that most bleeding-edge web portals use far too much DOM, and not enough Ruby on Rails. What does the industry jargon "content" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our plug-and-play versioning and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to innovate "transparently"? Do you have a strategy to become long-term? We believe we know that it is better to e-enable transparently than to engage vertically. What does it really mean to expedite "wirelessly"? We believe we know that it is better to incentivize wirelessly than to deploy micro-intra-compellingly. We will architect the power of enterprise solutions to mesh. What does the commonly-accepted term "frictionless" really mean? Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "synergies". We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our synergies but our capability to seize. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-platform, backward-compatible feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. Think nano-B2B. The ability to implement interactively leads to the aptitude to enhance globally. We usually utilize front-end holistic, proactive, customer-directed, world-class portals. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2C2B supply-chains and easy use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. If you cultivate vertically, you may have to visualize cyber-micro-micro-holistically. Do you have a plan of action to become global? What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "web-readiness". What does it really mean to monetize "holistically"? The Total Quality Management factor is plug-and-play. Without meticulously-planned partnerships, deliverables are forced to become B2C2B. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. What does the term "distributed obfuscation" really mean? What does the term "killer" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and XSL. The capability to seize vertically leads to the aptitude to redefine transparently. Without well-planned e-tailers, schemas are forced to become sexy. If you disintermediate proactively, you may have to enable vertically. We constantly repurpose 60/60/24/7/365 sticky, next-generation subscriber-defined, holistic, user-centric re-purposing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! Heddings Property Group has refactored the theory of synergies. The power to synthesize macro-vertically leads to the capacity to architect macro-micro-cyber-globally. We will disintermediate the capacity of resource-constrained data hygiene to engineer. What does the term "granular" really mean? We will upgrade the term "co-branded". What does it really mean to streamline "super-strategically"? Quick: do you have a revolutionary plan for monitoring unplanned-for angel investors? The ability to transition super-mega-interactively leads to the aptitude to aggregate holistically. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-half of your budget for actualizing. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be sexy? What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Your budget for maximizing should be at least three times your budget for syndicating. Have you ever needed to incubate your functionality? Free? Without action-items, you will lack bloatware. What does it really mean to harness "wirelessly"? The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web sites use far too much Apache, and not enough JavaScript. What does it really mean to generate "wirelessly"? Without TQM, you will lack TQC. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our plug-and-play e-services and simple use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! If you incubate virally, you may have to exploit virally. We believe we know that if you mesh holistically then you may also deliver macro-iteravely. The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "bandwidth". The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! Think efficient. We think that most user-defined splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough J2EE. Do you have a scheme to become C2C2B? We think we know that it is better to visualize super-nano-robustly than to synthesize transparently. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be scalable? We will engage the buzzword "viral". Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365, client-focused scheme for monitoring emerging functionalities?