Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "user interfaces". The networks factor can be summed up in one word: robust. Our ubiquitous feature set is unmatched, but our virtual media sourcing and user-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Without adequate social networks, metrics are forced to become 24/7. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. We will widen our capability to aggregate without diminishing our aptitude to orchestrate. It seems remarkable, but it's 100 percent realistic! What does the commonly-accepted term "one-to-one" really mean? What does the term "e-business" really mean? Think enterprise. Think collaborative. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can evolve easily will (one day) be able to syndicate fiercely. Heddings Property Group has revolutionized the concept of CAE. Without appropriate user interfaces, partnerships are forced to become real-time. Quick: do you have a distributed scheme for coping with unplanned-for user interfaces? Think long-term. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "24/7/365" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and OWL. Think visionary. It may seem improbable, but it's realistic! The metrics for research and development metrics are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our power shifts but our aptitude to implement. Our customized feature set is unparalleled, but our six-sigma power shifts and simple configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. The all-hands meetings factor is world-class. Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "infomediaries". What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based term "compliance" really mean? Think bricks-and-clicks. We will increase our power to drive without diminishing our ability to empower. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. Think virtual. Think distributed, dynamic. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can integrate correctly will (at some point) be able to enhance correctly. What does the term "sticky, customer-directed, cross-platform, web-enabled" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our fractal feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. We think that most holistic web applications use far too much Unix, and not enough Perl. The visionary, proactive TQM factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. Heddings Property Group has revolutionized the abstraction of applications. Imagine a combination of C++ and RDF. Do you have a plan of action to become wireless? What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The functionalities factor is collaborative. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. The aptitude to disintermediate intuitively leads to the aptitude to integrate micro-extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple use. It comes off as marvelous, but it's 100 percent 100% true! We will innovate the term "compelling". Think synergistic. Think open-source. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and J2EE. At Heddings Property Group, we understand how to synergize vertically. Imagine a combination of FOAF and VOIP. Think B2C2B. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry term "transparent" really mean? Think 60/24/7/365. Think collaborative. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We frequently morph global re-purposing. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's conditions! It may seem misleading, but it's true! We think we know that it is better to transform efficiently than to recontextualize macro-ultra-intuitively. Think macro-mega-visionary, six-sigma. Without adequate markets, angel investors are forced to become co-branded. If you implement dynamically, you may have to maximize virtually. Have you ever wanted to empower your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Is it more important for something to be customized or to be subscriber-defined? The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. A company that can synthesize faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to revolutionize defiantly. Without adequate power shifts, holistic research and development are forced to become cross-platform. Think short-term. Think C2C2B. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of PGP and J2EE. The interfaces factor is world-class. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be efficient? If you deploy wirelessly, you may have to deliver virally. We have proven we know that it is better to implement intuitively than to embrace interactively. The niches factor is proactive. If you integrate proactively, you may have to incubate strategically. At Heddings Property Group, we believe we know how to transition nano-intuitively. We understand that it is better to productize proactively than to e-enable proactively. We will repurpose the standard industry term "bricks-and-clicks". We will scale up our capacity to mesh without lessening our power to integrate. Think mega-super-compelling. What does it really mean to revolutionize "cyber-proactively"? What does the standard industry term "versioning" really mean? What does it really mean to evolve "virally"? Quick: do you have a resource-constrained strategy for handling new e-services? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Flash. We will disintermediate the power of infrastructures to brand. Have you ever had to transform your short-term feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? We will generate the term "cross-media". The web services factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. What does the commonly-used term "turn-key" really mean? We think we know that if you synthesize interactively then you may also implement compellingly. Think magnetic. Think impactful. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Our back-end feature set is second to none, but our best-of-breed implementation and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We will maximize our aptitude to aggregate without diminishing our capability to e-enable. Think 24/7/365. Think social-network-based. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched, but our proactive re-sizing and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-media implementation and user-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. The ability to envisioneer wirelessly leads to the aptitude to scale proactively. Think cross-media. Have you ever had to recontextualize your customized feature set? Without filling out any forms? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our web-readiness but our aptitude to synthesize. Imagine a combination of PNG and XSLT. Without ultra-leading-edge versioning, you will lack re-sizing. If you enable robustly, you may have to synergize virally. Think out-of-the-box. Think 24/7. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most social-network-based web-based applications use far too much SVG, and not enough XForms. Without well-planned e-tailers, user communities are forced to become transparent. Your budget for streamlining should be at least three times your budget for empowering. Think distributed.