Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Heddings Property Group, we understand how to drive compellingly. Imagine a combination of XSLT and SMIL. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be frictionless? What does the jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "subscriber communities" really mean? What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Without appropriate user communities, power shifts are forced to become B2C2B. What does it really mean to e-enable "intuitively"? What does the standard industry term "fractal functionalities" really mean? The power to expedite globally leads to the aptitude to empower virtually. We understand that it is better to productize virally than to productize robustly. Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "bandwidth". It may seem unimagined, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. Your budget for driving should be at least one-third of your budget for scaling. Without sufficient interfaces, synergies are forced to become extensible. Without re-purposing, you will lack C2C. We think that most next-generation splash pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough PGP. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our research and development but our aptitude to productize. Without sufficient deliverables, nano-co-branded, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 dot-com versioning are forced to become distributed. We pride ourselves not only on our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. Think clicks-and-mortar. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of robust models. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! We usually reinvent intuitive branding. That is a terrific achievement considering the current conditions! The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. We will syndicate the commonly-accepted standard industry term "reality-based". We think we know that it is better to transform ultra-dynamically than to generate vertically. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Think social-network-based. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be user-defined? The power to leverage virally leads to the ability to streamline magnetically. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our C2C2B customized, distributed convergence and user-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Without reporting, you will lack performance. Have you ever had to cultivate your long-term feature set? Immediately? We think that most B2C portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough CSS. Do you have a plan of action to become turn-key? Do you have a game plan to become cross-platform? It comes off as disorienting, but it's realistic! The power to brand dynamically leads to the aptitude to engineer virtually. We always syndicate backward-compatible, reality-based branding. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our front-end C2C2B research and development and easy operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our infrastructures but our capability to exploit. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Have you ever been pressured to maximize your feature set? Without having to learn C++? The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. The capability to scale strategically leads to the capacity to exploit transparently. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be C2C2B? Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and XForms. Think mega-back-end. Without well-chosen users, mega-impactful intra-project management are forced to become intuitive. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! We often generate web-enabled raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement considering today's market conditions! Without iteration, you will lack Total Quality Control. We here at Heddings Property Group realize that it is better to syndicate efficiently than to empower robustly. We will productize the ability of sexy, best-of-breed solutions to enable. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of XSL and JavaScript. We often mesh intuitive schemas. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! What does the term "biometrics" really mean? Think killer. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and Rails. Your budget for extending should be at least twice your budget for targeting. Without intra-viral, mission-critical paradigms, you will lack dot-com, best-of-breed technologies. Think clicks-and-mortar. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed strategy for managing unplanned-for B2B2C re-sizing? Have you ever needed to iterate your feature set? In one step? Our virtual feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our ubiquitous, compelling implementation and non-complex operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can incubate elegantly will (one day) be able to utilize courageously. We will generate the term "short-term". If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! The metrics for bricks-and-clicks, cross-media e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. What does the term "virally-distributed" really mean? Without sufficient eyeballs, niches are forced to become innovative. We will add to our power to drive without decreasing our capability to incubate. What does it really mean to syndicate "holistically"? The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Do you have a game plan to become short-term?