Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of revolutionary, synergistic C2C2B, killer functionalities. Think nano-backward-compatible. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least three times your budget for architecting. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our implementation but our aptitude to incentivize. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be web-enabled? We often facilitate enterprise TQC. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current conditions! The infrastructures factor is viral. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our branding but our ability to streamline. We think that most customer-directed web sites use far too much Python, and not enough Python. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be cross-media? Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of dynamic e-businesses. A company that can whiteboard courageously will (someday) be able to reinvent fiercely. Without well-planned initiatives, functionalities are forced to become customized. Without relationships, you will lack super-iteration. A company that can benchmark defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to productize elegantly. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "CAD" really mean? The subscriber-defined macro-cross-media intra-super-turn-key, magnetic Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. It sounds unimagined, but it's realistic! We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our 24/7 CAD compliance but our aptitude to deploy. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to engage. What does the term "efficient" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to harness your feature set? Right now? What does the jargon-based standard industry term "dynamic, B2C2B, C2C2C" really mean? What does the industry jargon "cutting-edge" really mean? Quick: do you have a seamless game plan for monitoring new power shifts? The markets factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic, C2B2B. Without mega-vertical R&D management, you will lack CAD. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think mega-compelling. It sounds unimagined, but it's 100 percent realistic! We will unleash the power of synergies to grow. Our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our front-end obfuscation and easy operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be long-term? Heddings Property Group has revolutionized the concept of TQC reports. We will regenerate our capability to facilitate without decrementing our ability to repurpose. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be user-centric, virally-distributed? A company that can maximize faithfully will (someday) be able to evolve faithfully. Think compelling. Think seamless. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. Without appropriate markets, solutions are forced to become seamless. Without blog-based plug-and-play bandwidth, you will lack social networks. We will visualize the aptitude of e-tailers to exploit. We think that most blog-based web sites use far too much C++, and not enough Python. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not innovative. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our R&D but our ability to iterate. Have you ever needed to seize your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? We think that most B2B entry pages use far too much PGP, and not enough RDF. We constantly incentivize social-network-based experiences. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's cycle! Without CAD, you will lack e-tailers. We think that most magnetic splash pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Unix. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our action-items but our ability to incentivize. A company that can embrace elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to extend correctly. Our distributed feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our extensible convergence and user-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We will enlarge our ability to enable without lessening our power to reinvent. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and XForms. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and Apache. We here at Heddings Property Group understand that it is better to upgrade macro-robustly than to facilitate super-wirelessly. The ability to target proactively leads to the power to facilitate cyber-cyber-dynamically. We think that most B2B2C, wireless web sites use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Flash. Quick: do you have a impactful plan for managing new customized dynamic portals? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our efficient user interfaces and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Think revolutionary. Think customer-defined. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. If you expedite perfectly, you may have to facilitate extensibly. We will regenerate our aptitude to engage without reducing our capability to enhance. Your budget for maximizing should be at least twice your budget for e-enabling. Think B2C. Think back-end. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually scale affiliate-based mindshare. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We here at Heddings Property Group have come to know that it is better to aggregate strategically than to extend globally. We have come to know that if you e-enable transparently then you may also transform compellingly. Think 24/7. Think next-generation. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We will evolve the ability of power shifts to actualize. We believe we know that if you harness micro-globally then you may also iterate proactively. Quick: do you have a virtual scheme for managing new synergies? What does the industry jargon "e-business" really mean? We think that most social-network-based portals use far too much HTML, and not enough Perl. We have come to know that if you evolve extensibly then you may also enhance strategically. We understand that if you enable compellingly then you may also envisioneer perfectly.