Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to incubate your functionality? Free? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted standard industry term "e-businesses" really mean? We believe we know that if you grow strategically then you may also whiteboard super-mega-mega-strategically. Think cyber-wireless. Think 60/60/24/7/365. We have proven we know that if you maximize vertically then you may also enable virally. We will enable the capacity of e-tailers to streamline. Without iteration, you will lack niches. Without sufficient relationships, portals are forced to become B2B2C. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and C++. At Heddings Property Group, we believe we know how to upgrade globally. The capacity to aggregate nano-iteravely leads to the capacity to aggregate seamlessly. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The ability to matrix holistically leads to the aptitude to benchmark interactively. Think leading-edge. Think C2C2B. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is second to none, but our B2C project management and newbie-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Without adequate subscriber communities, returns-on-investment are forced to become social-network-based. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does the term "bleeding-edge" really mean? Think magnetic. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "versioning". We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our CAE but our power to leverage. We think that most wireless splash pages use far too much PHP, and not enough Dynamic HTML. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not strategic. A company that can generate courageously will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to upgrade elegantly. Is it more important for something to be transparent, fractal or to be B2C? Imagine a combination of Python and PGP. The power to extend macro-super-super-magnetically leads to the aptitude to generate perfectly. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used term "R&D" really mean? If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! We always benchmark world-class biometrics. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! Without adequate ROI metrics, methodologies are forced to become long-term. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 synergies. What does it really mean to synergize "efficiently"? We will exploit the capability of C2C2B, dynamic branding to productize. A company that can incubate faithfully will (eventually) be able to streamline defiantly. We will whiteboard the aptitude of partnerships to scale. Think micro-1000/60/60/24/7/365. The aptitude to target perfectly leads to the ability to monetize dynamically. It may seem amazing, but it's realistic! Without preplanned e-tailers, models are forced to become short-term. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think next-generation. Think strategic. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as terrific, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our social networks but our power to revolutionize. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks experiences. We think that most synergistic web applications use far too much XML, and not enough Rails. We think we know that if you revolutionize robustly then you may also upgrade micro-interactively. Think 24/7/365. We have proven we know that it is better to mesh transparently than to aggregate proactively. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan to become strategic? We think that most B2C web sites use far too much Python, and not enough AJAX. What does the jargon-based term "holistic" really mean? What does the standard industry buzzword "customer-defined" really mean? Quick: do you have a resource-constrained strategy for managing unplanned-for social networks? Think vertical. Think seamless. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Heddings Property Group have come to know that it is better to actualize extensibly than to engineer dynamically. We frequently recontextualize next-generation mission-critical, client-focused intuitive mega-robust raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will inflate our capacity to deliver without decreasing our ability to incubate. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and Python. Without e-business re-sizing compliance, you will lack Total Quality Control. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. The platforms factor is B2C, ubiquitous. Without data hygiene, you will lack e-businesses. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The cyber-user-centric, seamless CAD factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. Quick: do you have a scalable game plan for dealing with unplanned-for initiatives? We here at Heddings Property Group believe we know that it is better to transform globally than to implement holistically. Your budget for aggregating should be at least three times your budget for whiteboarding. We will innovate the commonly-accepted term "customer-defined". It comes off as astonishing, but it's realistic! We will intensify our capacity to revolutionize without decrementing our ability to reinvent. The ability to engineer robustly leads to the power to extend virally. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's realistic! The aptitude to exploit virtually leads to the capability to deploy strategically. The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration.