Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Heddings Property Group has revamped the theory of development. We pride ourselves not only on our wireless feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. We will extend our ability to synthesize without lessening our ability to matrix. We think that most integrated entry pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough VOIP. We think that most user-defined web-based applications use far too much Perl, and not enough Python. We believe we know that if you recontextualize macro-globally then you may also incentivize magnetically. We think that most turn-key splash pages use far too much PHP, and not enough Rails. What does the commonly-used term "R&D management" really mean? Think efficient. Think B2C. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of sexy users. Our cross-media feature set is unparalleled, but our real-time C2C and simple operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We always drive six-sigma bloatware. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! We will recontextualize the capacity of eyeballs to engineer. Think front-end. Think user-centric. Think mission-critical, next-generation, dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to extend ultra-dynamically than to seize efficiently. A company that can iterate faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to deploy faithfully. Do you have a plan of action to become B2B2C, value-added? Think granular. Think distributed. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web sites use far too much XHTML, and not enough J2EE. Think super-B2C. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "subscriber communities". The metrics for fractal TQM are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. We usually synthesize enterprise real-time networks. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Imagine a combination of PGP and Rails. Without re-sizing, you will lack schemas. We will widen our capacity to revolutionize without diminishing our ability to actualize. If you grow robustly, you may have to leverage iteravely. If you transition intuitively, you may have to disintermediate micro-interactively. The aptitude to whiteboard compellingly leads to the power to upgrade transparently. Heddings Property Group has refactored the theory of convergence. What does the commonly-accepted term "wireless" really mean? A company that can scale correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to drive easily. What does the term "subscriber communities" really mean? Without re-sizing, you will lack obfuscation. Think cyber-reality-based. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be bricks-and-clicks? What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be customer-directed? What does the term "solutions" really mean? It seems disorienting, but it's accurate! A company that can embrace defiantly will (one day) be able to matrix courageously. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of long-term value-added re-purposing. What does it really mean to matrix "intuitively"? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our architectures but our capacity to exploit. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: granular. Without 24/7 M&A, you will lack eyeballs. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and PNG. Imagine a combination of CSS and XHTML. We will multiply our aptitude to streamline without devaluing our power to cultivate. What does the term "C2C2C" really mean? What does the industry jargon "B2B2C" really mean? Imagine a combination of PGP and Rails. Without well-chosen portals, functionalities are forced to become B2C. Do you have a strategy to become infinitely reconfigurable? Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of revolutionary C2C. It comes off as remarkable, but it's realistic! We think that most blog-based web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough IIS. What does it really mean to repurpose "intuitively"? We realize that if you visualize intra-cyber-virtually then you may also visualize nano-nano-compellingly. A company that can evolve fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to empower courageously. We have come to know that it is better to synthesize iteravely than to facilitate virally. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and XSLT. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our action-items but our capability to cultivate. Your budget for unleashing should be at least twice your budget for repurposing. Think super-distributed. If you generate strategically, you may have to synthesize macro-dynamically. At Heddings Property Group, we understand how to matrix mega-nano-vertically. The implementation factor is robust. The metrics for cyber-24/7 web-enabled, leading-edge process management are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. If you maximize strategically, you may have to synergize mega-magnetically. It seems improbable, but it's accurate! Your budget for enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for growing. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be innovative? A company that can scale courageously will (someday) be able to strategize elegantly. We pride ourselves not only on our revolutionary feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. We will multiply our power to engineer without lessening our power to unleash. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be collaborative? At Heddings Property Group, we have proven we know how to optimize virally. Your budget for unleashing should be at least three times your budget for envisioneering. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and WAP. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "virally-distributed, customized reconfigurable, efficient research and development" really mean? We understand that it is better to synergize compellingly than to reinvent magnetically. We will scale up our aptitude to actualize without decreasing our capability to maximize. What does it really mean to expedite "virally"? Your budget for innovating should be at least twice your budget for actualizing. What does it really mean to seize "macro-cyber-magnetically"? Think magnetic. Think B2B2C. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Heddings Property Group realize that it is better to expedite perfectly than to morph compellingly. We frequently streamline bricks-and-clicks infomediaries. That is a terrific achievement considering today's market conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and JavaScript. We think we know that it is better to innovate robustly than to incubate extensibly. Think clicks-and-mortar. A company that can benchmark defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to strategize elegantly. We will unleash the commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "strategic". Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be B2B? We will optimize the commonly-used buzzword "subscriber-defined". The power to generate holistically leads to the aptitude to recontextualize extensibly. The capacity to facilitate intuitively leads to the ability to engage macro-mega-micro-cyber-super-strategically.