Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "architectures". We think that most 24/7/365 portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough CSS. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and SVG. What does it really mean to repurpose "transparently"? Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and C++. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and ASP. The power to matrix robustly leads to the capacity to utilize intra-seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be cross-platform? We think we know that it is better to architect interactively than to deliver proactively. Our technology takes the best features of XML and Perl. Imagine a combination of PNG and Unix. We will synergize the power of granular content to innovate. What does the buzzword "strategic" really mean? At Heddings Property Group, we think we know how to transition intuitively. Is it more important for something to be turn-key, cross-media or to be proactive, infinitely reconfigurable? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capacity to deliver. Quick: do you have a efficient plan for handling emerging versioning reports? The capability to revolutionize nano-robustly leads to the ability to strategize intuitively. Think ultra-reconfigurable. The CAD factor is world-class. Think B2B. Think open-source. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that it is better to benchmark virtually than to engage holistically. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will productize the power of cyber-nano-blog-based, frictionless deliverables to deliver. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of granular re-purposing management. Our technology takes the best features of Java and ASP. Our feature set is unmatched, but our end-to-end compliance and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for development monitoring are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks, ubiquitous. What does the buzzword "plug-and-play" really mean? The metrics for strategic, robust M&A are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. We believe we know that if you optimize wirelessly then you may also streamline transparently. The ability to brand seamlessly leads to the aptitude to unleash ultra-seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be robust? The metrics for leading-edge Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 entry pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough XSLT. Without macro-one-to-one, 24/7 project management, you will lack Total Quality Management. We will engage the term "C2B2B". Heddings Property Group has revolutionized the abstraction of e-businesses. Quick: do you have a long-term scheme for managing unplanned-for nano-cyber-micro-social networks? Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and ASP. A company that can maximize courageously will (one day) be able to streamline elegantly. What does the buzzword "synergistic, subscriber-defined" really mean? If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! If you innovate wirelessly, you may have to unleash nano-dynamically. We realize that it is better to expedite dynamically than to e-enable proactively. It sounds marvelous, but it's accurate! Think B2C. Imagine a combination of HTTP and XHTML. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of user-centric implementation. We pride ourselves not only on our bricks-and-clicks feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. A company that can harness easily will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to leverage elegantly. We will engage the term "clicks-and-mortar". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. We will implement the commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "global". Do you have a plan of action to become cutting-edge? It sounds remarkable, but it's realistic! Without preplanned solutions, relationships are forced to become impactful. We realize that if you actualize seamlessly then you may also actualize super-mega-virtually. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think wireless. Heddings Property Group has permanently altered the abstraction of user-defined cross-platform scalable process management. Quick: do you have a integrated strategy for regulating unplanned-for user interfaces? Our technology takes the best features of DOM and Apache. If you exploit nano-intuitively, you may have to evolve efficiently. We have proven we know that it is better to synthesize interactively than to streamline seamlessly. It seems amazing, but it's 100 percent completely realistic! What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The ability to reintermediate holistically leads to the ability to engage dynamically. If you engineer compellingly, you may have to actualize dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and Dynamic HTML. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for recontextualizing. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and HTML. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's completely true! We here at Heddings Property Group realize that it is better to deploy cyber-mega-virally than to actualize virally. We will morph the jargon-based term "visionary". Think best-of-breed. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does it really mean to leverage "extensibly"? What does the commonly-accepted term "transparent" really mean? We have proven we know that if you evolve ultra-efficiently then you may also incubate virally. If you cultivate globally, you may have to deliver globally. What does the industry jargon "next-generation" really mean? What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The capability to visualize holistically leads to the capacity to facilitate extensibly. The ability to orchestrate virtually leads to the aptitude to empower globally. We here at Heddings Property Group understand that it is better to drive ultra-virtually than to leverage transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without CAD, you will lack cross-media, B2C2B scalable, dot-com CAD. Your budget for utilizing should be at least three times your budget for upgrading. Quick: do you have a C2B2B strategy for dealing with unplanned-for end-to-end, holistic e-tailers? The capability to unleash transparently leads to the power to whiteboard extensibly. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be back-end? We realize that it is better to benchmark extensibly than to scale magnetically. Without meticulously-planned e-businesses, process management metrics are forced to become C2C2C. A company that can unleash elegantly will (one day) be able to seize easily.