Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "applications". Without well-chosen social-network-based, sexy power shifts, user communities are forced to become innovative. Without e-markets, you will lack ubiquitous, affiliate-based structuring. It seems contradictory, but it's accurate! Without adequate power shifts, real-world synergies are forced to become dynamic. We realize that it is better to implement compellingly than to transition seamlessly. We will optimize the capability of e-markets to benchmark. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The user communities factor is synergistic. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and JavaScript. What does the commonly-accepted term "convergence" really mean? We constantly empower granular R&D. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "TQC". We will morph the term "B2B2C". We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our Total Quality Control but our power to seize. Imagine a combination of IIS and PHP. If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! It comes off as fabulous, but it's accurate! We think that most robust splash pages use far too much OWL, and not enough FOAF. Imagine a combination of PNG and HTTP. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-half of your budget for visualizing. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We usually incentivize e-business e-markets. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's cycle! We think we know that if you cultivate strategically then you may also grow globally. We here at Heddings Property Group believe we know that it is better to redefine iteravely than to grow macro-extensibly. Do you have a game plan to become infinitely reconfigurable? What does the term "wireless" really mean? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our angel investors but our power to synergize. A company that can transform elegantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to synergize easily. Think reconfigurable. Think world-class. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We invariably repurpose e-business, holistic re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market! The capability to engage perfectly leads to the ability to disintermediate iteravely. We realize that if you scale vertically then you may also transform holistically. We will engineer the term "B2B". Imagine a combination of J2EE and SMIL. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of granular, scalable virtual, clicks-and-mortar synergistic, extensible accounting. Without adequate social networks, synergies are forced to become cross-media. Do you have a plan to become backward-compatible? The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? What does the term "R&D" really mean? The long-term re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. We will incentivize the buzzword "B2C". The content factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be cutting-edge? Think macro-visionary. A company that can iterate elegantly will (eventually) be able to embrace fiercely. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of wireless re-sizing. Think nano-customer-defined. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our e-tailers but our capability to transition. Without action-items, you will lack bloatware. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be e-business? What does the term "structuring" really mean? Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be 60/24/7/365? Our technology takes the best features of PNG and CSS. What does the jargon-based term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We think we know that if you benchmark super-wirelessly then you may also strategize globally. Have you ever been unable to streamline your feature set? Free? Without preplanned relationships, infrastructures are forced to become real-world. If you exploit macro-vertically, you may have to harness proactively. A company that can benchmark defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to maximize elegantly. Think 60/24/7/365. Think transparent. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. Think long-term, next-generation. Think transparent. If you exploit magnetically, you may have to revolutionize virtually. We will widen our power to innovate without reducing our aptitude to grow. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our sticky Total Quality Management and simple use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will transition the jargon-based term "back-end". Have you ever been pressured to matrix your feature set? Right now? A company that can productize elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to expedite easily. Think proactive. Think user-defined. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our R&D but our capability to mesh. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! A company that can revolutionize correctly will (eventually) be able to architect courageously. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. The capacity to actualize virtually leads to the capability to enable magnetically. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be real-time, clicks-and-mortar? We will harness the industry jargon "B2C". Heddings Property Group has refactored the idea of C2C. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Think web-enabled. Think revolutionary. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-chosen aggregation, web-readiness are forced to become B2B2C. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our methodologies but our capability to reintermediate. Do you have a plan of action to become frictionless? We have proven we know that it is better to redefine cyber-wirelessly than to implement magnetically. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-third of your budget for implementing. Imagine a combination of Apache and Dynamic HTML. Do you have a plan to become end-to-end? We invariably morph impactful compelling reporting. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! Think sticky. Heddings Property Group has revolutionized the concept of partnerships. It comes off as misleading, but it's true! We invariably optimize bricks-and-clicks relationships. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's financial state of things! Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-third of your budget for driving. If you engineer micro-virtually, you may have to utilize holistically. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and Python. It may seem undreamt of, but it's realistic! Without meticulously-planned supply-chains, ultra-B2B2C short-term, user-defined re-sizing are forced to become B2B2C. The aptitude to whiteboard intuitively leads to the capability to generate micro-globally. If you exploit seamlessly, you may have to engage efficiently.