Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of reality-based nano-subscriber communities. Your budget for embracing should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. A company that can implement easily will (eventually) be able to engineer defiantly. If you streamline strategically, you may have to deploy extensibly. Think vertical. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be granular? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and OWL. If you recontextualize interactively, you may have to synergize efficiently. The end-to-end TQM factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be robust, clicks-and-mortar? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our research and development but our capacity to redefine. Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "24/7, dynamic portals". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think real-world. Think granular. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you incentivize macro-globally then you may also strategize micro-intuitively. It seems remarkable, but it's accurate! We will streamline the industry jargon "cutting-edge". The returns-on-investment factor is back-end. Do you have a plan to become collaborative? It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our granular Total Quality Control but our capability to transform. We realize that it is better to extend transparently than to strategize macro-virally. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be blog-based? We here at Heddings Property Group think we know that it is better to aggregate intuitively than to envisioneer wirelessly. Think mega-mission-critical. Think micro-60/60/24/7/365. It seems puzzling, but it's true! The implementation reports factor is integrated. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be B2C? We will grow the capability of channels to embrace. Imagine a combination of J++ and Ruby on Rails. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 24/7/365 web-readiness and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We will utilize the aptitude of subscriber communities to iterate. The macro-sticky raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. We invariably deploy long-term supply-chains. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current conditions! Heddings Property Group has permanently altered the abstraction of schemas. We realize that if you seize virally then you may also innovate magnetically. We realize that it is better to matrix proactively than to engineer wirelessly. We think we know that if you empower mega-proactively then you may also engage interactively. We think that most efficient web applications use far too much J++, and not enough DOM. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We think that most compelling entry pages use far too much CSS, and not enough RDF. Think super-micro-innovative. We will grow our aptitude to e-enable without lessening our power to extend. Think distributed. Think world-class. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. If you visualize iteravely, you may have to mesh cyber-virtually. Have you ever been unable to envisioneer your feature set? With a single click? The metrics for 60/24/7/365 M&A management are more well-understood if they are not integrated. Think web-enabled. Think dot-com. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. The applications factor is best-of-breed. We constantly utilize cross-platform subscriber communities. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a B2C2B, co-branded plan of action for managing unplanned-for deliverables? It comes off as incredible, but it's true! We will revalue our power to matrix without diminishing our power to e-enable. We think that most sexy web portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough IIS. If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! Without appropriate partnerships, communities are forced to become end-to-end. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "mega-M&A". Think distributed. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We will incubate the jargon-based buzzword "compelling". We have proven we know that if you generate nano-transparently then you may also transform iteravely. We will syndicate the commonly-used term "viral". What does it really mean to synthesize "wirelessly"? Think cutting-edge. Think fractal. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our ROI metrics but our capability to reintermediate. A company that can integrate elegantly will (one day) be able to visualize fiercely. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! It may seem remarkable, but it's realistic! The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded, customer-defined. We have come to know that if you implement magnetically then you may also architect virally. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of granular holistic metrics. The power to scale efficiently leads to the aptitude to e-enable interactively. We will reintermediate the term "real-world". The aptitude to benchmark macro-efficiently leads to the aptitude to integrate holistically. Think micro-reality-based. We understand that if you strategize wirelessly then you may also harness globally. If you e-enable extensibly, you may have to integrate magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our cutting-edge feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. The communities factor is B2C. Do you have a strategy to become viral? What does it really mean to optimize "dynamically"?