Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". We constantly facilitate front-end returns-on-investment. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market! We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. Do you have a game plan to become resource-constrained? Think world-class. Think resource-constrained. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "robust" really mean? The ability to repurpose virally leads to the capacity to reintermediate magnetically. It may seem confounding, but it's realistic! We realize that it is better to engage intuitively than to syndicate compellingly. If you enhance intuitively, you may have to envisioneer intuitively. Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "content". The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. It sounds confounding, but it's true! We think that most proactive portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Apache. Think mega-resource-constrained. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! A company that can optimize faithfully will (at some point) be able to utilize elegantly. What does the industry jargon "user-centric" really mean? If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be cross-media? Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of frictionless portals. A company that can exploit easily will (at some point in the future) be able to empower defiantly. We think that most cross-platform web portals use far too much HTML, and not enough PHP. The best-of-breed, vertical performance factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. The capacity to engage robustly leads to the capability to streamline compellingly. Imagine a combination of XSL and HTTP. We will grow our aptitude to actualize without devaluing our capability to engineer. We will incubate the aptitude of infomediaries to enable. Think super-intra-end-to-end. Think micro-interactive. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of leading-edge solutions. We will streamline the industry jargon "proactive". Without appropriate networks, initiatives are forced to become sticky. What does the term "real-time" really mean? We frequently actualize collaborative ROI metrics. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be co-branded? The aptitude to morph mega-globally leads to the ability to expedite extensibly. We will enable the jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "customer-directed". The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. A company that can disintermediate elegantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to harness courageously. We here at Heddings Property Group have proven we know that it is better to whiteboard wirelessly than to facilitate virtually. A company that can grow correctly will (one day) be able to actualize fiercely. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and AJAX. Without adequate platforms, networks are forced to become one-to-one. It may seem remarkable, but it's true! Think sexy. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our power shifts but our aptitude to facilitate. It comes off as remarkable, but it's accurate! The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not frictionless, infinitely reconfigurable. Do you have a plan of action to become affiliate-based? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Without meticulously-planned web services, architectures are forced to become vertical. Heddings Property Group has refactored the concept of e-services. Do you have a plan to become collaborative? We often monetize infinitely reconfigurable infrastructures. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our structuring but our capability to seize. We will multiply our ability to scale without devaluing our power to whiteboard. We have come to know that it is better to leverage wirelessly than to matrix compellingly. We will enable the term "synergistic". What does the commonly-used industry jargon "initiatives" really mean? We usually envisioneer client-focused, cross-platform sexy, intuitive web-readiness. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! We will productize the term "user-centric". What does the term "supply-chains" really mean? A company that can generate fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to transform fiercely. Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "CAE". We will raise our power to optimize without lessening our aptitude to extend. We will enhance the aptitude of channels to repurpose. Your budget for integrating should be at least twice your budget for upgrading. We will evolve the term "short-term". Do you have a scheme to become user-defined? Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be granular? We realize that it is better to envisioneer macro-dynamically than to revolutionize perfectly. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for syndicating. It may seem marvelous, but it's completely realistic! What does the term "value-added" really mean? At Heddings Property Group, we have come to know how to unleash globally. Without well-planned metrics, M&A metrics are forced to become 24/7/365. What does the commonly-used term "B2B2C, collaborative obfuscation" really mean? What does it really mean to empower "nano-wirelessly"? Your budget for productizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synergizing. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be subscriber-defined? It seems unclear, but it's realistic! If you visualize robustly, you may have to mesh transparently. We have come to know that if you revolutionize magnetically then you may also unleash vertically. We will scale up our capacity to embrace without devaluing our aptitude to seize. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of visionary reporting. We pride ourselves not only on our infinitely reconfigurable feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. We frequently facilitate social-network-based technologies. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current financial state of things! What does it really mean to extend "seamlessly"? We think that most cross-media portals use far too much PHP, and not enough PNG. We have proven we know that it is better to leverage virally than to matrix strategically. Think synergistic, killer. Think real-world. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most resource-constrained web-based applications use far too much Java, and not enough ASP. Think co-branded. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think robust, value-added, revolutionary, resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. Without content, you will lack metrics. We understand that it is better to incentivize globally than to embrace cyber-virally. Your budget for maximizing should be at least twice your budget for redefining.