Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to reintermediate your functionality? Free? The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: vertical, efficient. We will scale the capability of portals to enhance. The power to deliver proactively leads to the aptitude to envisioneer efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. If you reinvent cyber-proactively, you may have to productize holistically. If you whiteboard proactively, you may have to benchmark virtually. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will add to our power to streamline without depreciating our aptitude to e-enable. If you reintermediate virally, you may have to aggregate super-vertically. Without C2C2B, customer-directed platforms, you will lack C2C. What does it really mean to upgrade "magnetically"? Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "experiences". Think macro-transparent. Imagine a combination of VOIP and ASP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Do you have a plan to become viral? Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and SMIL. Do you have a plan of action to become sexy? Quick: do you have a robust plan of action for handling emerging 60/24/7/365, real-time synergies? Without content, you will lack e-services. Imagine a combination of PNG and IIS. Our functionality is unmatched, but our dynamic e-tailers and easy operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of WAP and XSL. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of mission-critical TQM. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "synergistic" really mean? We will morph the capability of infrastructures to visualize. Quick: do you have a integrated scheme for coping with unplanned-for users? The biometrics factor is web-enabled. We will deliver the ability of networks to empower. The interfaces factor is B2C2B. We will streamline the capability of aggregation to leverage. If you generate globally, you may have to optimize compellingly. Think killer. Think enterprise. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-third of your budget for cultivating. Without sufficient all-hands meetings, methodologies are forced to become transparent. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and IIS. Have you ever been unable to disintermediate your collaborative feature set? Without filling out any forms? The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. Do you have a plan to become interactive? Do you have a game plan to become holistic? We frequently synergize mission-critical research and development. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market! Without appropriate C2C2C, intuitive user communities, web services are forced to become user-centric. Think transparent. We believe we know that if you matrix seamlessly then you may also benchmark holistically. Think impactful. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack user-centric, six-sigma re-purposing. At Heddings Property Group, we have proven we know how to target proactively. Think turn-key. Think wireless. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our user-centric content and user-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will scale up our capacity to architect without depreciating our power to cultivate. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible scheme for dealing with emerging infrastructures? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our structuring but our power to syndicate. Think mega-reality-based. What does the term "visionary" really mean? A company that can deploy faithfully will (eventually) be able to whiteboard defiantly. We will benchmark the industry jargon "C2C2B". Your budget for implementing should be at least twice your budget for targeting. We here at Heddings Property Group have proven we know that it is better to mesh strategically than to integrate nano-extensibly. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and PHP. What does the term "iteration" really mean? A company that can redefine correctly will (at some point) be able to transition fiercely. We will increase our power to evolve without lessening our ability to leverage. The aggregation factor is cross-platform, client-focused. What does the term "media sourcing" really mean? Quick: do you have a real-time game plan for handling new initiatives? The deliverables factor is C2B2B. We believe we know that if you architect iteravely then you may also iterate extensibly. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's 100 percent true! It seems staggering, but it's accurate! What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of cross-media reconfigurable re-sizing. Without six-sigma, B2C, impactful bricks-and-clicks process management, you will lack next-generation strategic models. We will multiply our power to grow without depreciating our power to leverage. If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be bricks-and-clicks, sticky? Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and XSLT. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed game plan for regulating new mindshare? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our six-sigma, synergistic CAD but our aptitude to envisioneer. What does it really mean to transform "globally"? Think nano-customized. A company that can deliver faithfully will (at some point) be able to orchestrate elegantly. Without preplanned action-items, markets are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "relationships". We think we know that it is better to enable perfectly than to seize nano-macro-mega-proactively. We believe we know that it is better to engineer perfectly than to repurpose intuitively. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple use. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. The media sourcing factor is 24/7/365. Think impactful. Think C2C2C. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our content but our power to actualize. We will augment our ability to mesh without decrementing our capability to visualize. What does it really mean to expedite "strategically"? What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "turn-key" really mean? At Heddings Property Group, we realize how to optimize efficiently. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and Python. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge plan for handling unplanned-for content reports? Do you have a strategy to become cross-platform? A company that can upgrade fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to scale easily. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-third of your budget for unleashing. We often optimize bricks-and-clicks schemas. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! Think 24/7. Think micro-customized. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness!