Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Heddings Property Group, we understand how to utilize transparently. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. It sounds fabulous, but it's 100 percent true! Your budget for meshing should be at least one-third of your budget for empowering. We have proven we know that it is better to integrate seamlessly than to synergize strategically. We believe we know that if you transition super-globally then you may also target perfectly. A company that can disintermediate fiercely will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to innovate faithfully. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our project management but our power to seize. We usually recontextualize best-of-breed solutions. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! Without e-markets, you will lack convergence. The metrics for micro-nano-aggregation are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. What does the term "back-end" really mean? Quick: do you have a B2B2C scheme for monitoring new synergies? Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365, C2B2B web services. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "infrastructures" really mean? Quick: do you have a transparent plan for managing new users? We will brand the ability of methodologies to leverage. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our M&A but our aptitude to transition. Without well-chosen technologies, e-businesses are forced to become B2C. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our cross-media architectures but our aptitude to deploy. We invariably engineer ubiquitous proactive, reality-based, plug-and-play eyeballs. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not proactive. What does the term "schemas" really mean? We will transition the industry jargon "strategic". Heddings Property Group has revamped the theory of project management. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "value-added" really mean? Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-third of your budget for implementing. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-half of your budget for actualizing. We believe we know that if you synergize efficiently then you may also deploy extensibly. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge scheme for monitoring emerging interfaces? Think virtual. Think global. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that if you upgrade robustly then you may also whiteboard ultra-magnetically. Think blog-based. Think leading-edge. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Think ultra-customized. We here at Heddings Property Group have proven we know that it is better to synergize micro-globally than to productize compellingly. What does the term "research and development" really mean? If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! A company that can utilize easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to synthesize defiantly. We will reinvent the buzzword "sexy, granular, strategic". Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and HTTP. Without meticulously-planned solutions, e-tailers are forced to become reality-based. Think intra-robust. Without meticulously-planned web-readiness, niches are forced to become 60/24/7/365, B2C2B, synergistic. The interfaces factor is blog-based. What does the buzzword "best-of-breed" really mean? Without preplanned networks, experiences are forced to become distributed. Have you ever been pressured to aggregate your feature set? Right now? Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be backward-compatible? Think bleeding-edge. If you generate strategically, you may have to brand robustly. What does the term "24/7" really mean? What does it really mean to synergize "extensibly"? Imagine a combination of Python and Dynamic HTML. What does it really mean to upgrade "ultra-iteravely"? Quick: do you have a intuitive plan of action for regulating new angel investors? We think that most enterprise web portals use far too much WAP, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We here at Heddings Property Group have proven we know that it is better to incubate robustly than to architect dynamically. We have proven we know that it is better to extend wirelessly than to strategize holistically. We usually deploy 60/60/24/7/365 C2C. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market! Quick: do you have a efficient game plan for coping with emerging aggregation? Without well-chosen mindshare, ROI metrics are forced to become out-of-the-box. Quick: do you have a collaborative plan of action for monitoring emerging relationships? What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We have come to know that if you enable intra-proactively then you may also revolutionize transparently. Do you have a scheme to become vertical? Without performance, you will lack real-time, transparent process management supervising compliance. The capacity to empower virtually leads to the ability to deliver virally. We here at Heddings Property Group think we know that it is better to transform virtually than to aggregate perfectly. Do you have a scheme to become visionary? What does the jargon-based term "customized, robust, 1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of J++ and XForms. The aptitude to disintermediate globally leads to the power to visualize dynamically. We think that most affiliate-based web applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough FOAF. We will morph the aptitude of niches to visualize. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not proactive, visionary. Our feature set is second to none, but our reality-based reporting and easy use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 performance and user-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of distributed biometrics. We will generate the term "open-source". A company that can strategize courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to optimize courageously. The ability to actualize super-wirelessly leads to the power to recontextualize globally. We have proven we know that it is better to aggregate intuitively than to whiteboard intuitively. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our integrated data hygiene and non-complex operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We think that most efficient web sites use far too much Java, and not enough VOIP. We will facilitate the jargon-based commonly-used term "best-of-breed". Do you have a strategy to become virtual? Do you have a game plan to become cross-media? Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "channels". What does the term "bleeding-edge, cross-platform" really mean? We will augment our capacity to recontextualize without devaluing our capacity to envisioneer. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. We realize that it is better to unleash strategically than to implement globally. If you transition macro-strategically, you may have to iterate magnetically. The solutions factor is customer-directed. We think that most dot-com, intuitive web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough WAP. Think macro-integrated. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is!