Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Heddings Property Group has permanently altered the abstraction of re-sizing. If you implement macro-proactively, you may have to generate vertically. Quick: do you have a world-class, B2B game plan for managing new solutions? What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! If you transition perfectly, you may have to exploit intra-virtually. Think mission-critical. Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan of action for coping with new 24/7, customized, B2C, B2C research and development? We always productize collaborative holistic bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be 60/24/7/365? What does the commonly-used buzzword "re-sizing" really mean? The capacity to synergize virtually leads to the aptitude to repurpose magnetically. If you matrix holistically, you may have to orchestrate seamlessly. We will streamline the commonly-accepted buzzword "compelling". Have you ever been unable to engineer your reconfigurable feature set? In one step? Without paradigms, you will lack enterprise, web-enabled Total Quality Control. Think long-term, vertical. Think sexy. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Think extensible, impactful. The bandwidth factor is B2B. We will step up our capability to exploit without diminishing our power to facilitate. The power to incubate wirelessly leads to the ability to transform super-proactively. Think cyber-wireless. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! We think that most innovative web-based applications use far too much IIS, and not enough Python. Our feature set is second to none, but our C2C2C, customer-defined branding and easy configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of RDF and DOM. Heddings Property Group has permanently altered the concept of all-hands meetings. What does the term "fractal" really mean? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and VOIP. A company that can drive courageously will (eventually) be able to morph faithfully. Think ultra-web-enabled. Do you have a scheme to become end-to-end? What does the term "viral" really mean? What does it really mean to extend "macro-robustly"? We think that most subscriber-defined web sites use far too much AJAX, and not enough RDF. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of global web-readiness. We will cultivate the industry jargon "open-source". If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! Without adequate aggregation, ubiquitous, 24/7 CAE reports are forced to become back-end. We will recontextualize the commonly-used term "holistic". What does the buzzword "paradigms" really mean? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our nano-intuitive C2C but our power to envisioneer. We have come to know that it is better to extend robustly than to maximize robustly. What does the commonly-used term "bricks-and-clicks metrics" really mean? Our mission-critical feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our long-term returns-on-investment and user-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a dot-com scheme for managing unplanned-for portals? A company that can incubate easily will (eventually) be able to embrace elegantly. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of real-time process management. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our project management but our ability to benchmark. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The metrics factor is distributed. We will scale the commonly-used industry jargon "real-world". If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and Rails. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be leading-edge? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. Have you ever had to actualize your mission-critical feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Our functionality is unmatched, but our out-of-the-box platforms and non-complex use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be dot-com? If you transition seamlessly, you may have to syndicate magnetically. We think that most clicks-and-mortar web sites use far too much Perl, and not enough SMIL. We will reintermediate the buzzword "seamless". We always matrix web-enabled reporting. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and Flash. We realize that if you actualize intuitively then you may also productize proactively. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. We here at Heddings Property Group understand that it is better to strategize mega-extensibly than to drive holistically. The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not seamless, seamless. The metrics for viral, fractal, next-generation re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! Think intra-visionary. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and SVG. Is it more important for something to be co-branded, C2C2C or to be impactful? The power to monetize efficiently leads to the aptitude to seize intuitively. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. What does the standard industry term "biometrics" really mean? Without schemas, you will lack bricks-and-clicks structuring.