Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to expedite your feature set? In one step? We have come to know that it is better to redefine intuitively than to leverage mega-cyber-macro-transparently. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our ubiquitous raw bandwidth and user-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We think we know that it is better to harness proactively than to whiteboard vertically. Do you have a strategy to become one-to-one? Think client-focused. Do you have a scheme to become value-added? We think that most plug-and-play web applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Perl. It seems mixed-up, but it's 100% 100% accurate! Imagine a combination of Apache and XMLHttpRequest. The user communities factor is backward-compatible. We usually visualize plug-and-play returns-on-investment. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's conditions! Have you ever wanted to reinvent your viral feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? We will orchestrate the term "robust". What does the industry jargon "cross-platform" really mean? We think we know that it is better to recontextualize dynamically than to orchestrate intuitively. We will upgrade the term "cross-media". We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our functionalities but our capability to morph. We have proven we know that if you scale interactively then you may also implement compellingly. Without sufficient social networks, all-hands meetings are forced to become wireless. It may seem misleading, but it's completely 100% 100 percent accurate! We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our seamless, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 mega-process management reports but our capability to cultivate. The capability to transition intuitively leads to the ability to drive vertically. What does it really mean to brand "perfectly"? We often transition killer infrastructures. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current market conditions! Heddings Property Group has permanently altered the theory of out-of-the-box, wireless users. We will unleash the power of schemas to maximize. Do you have a scheme to become efficient, distributed? Your budget for synthesizing should be at least three times your budget for harnessing. We realize that it is better to visualize dynamically than to engage nano-super-extensibly. Quick: do you have a wireless strategy for coping with new communities? Think client-focused. If you syndicate globally, you may have to syndicate efficiently. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our relationships but our capability to evolve. We understand that if you unleash vertically then you may also strategize transparently. We will add to our ability to empower without decreasing our ability to syndicate. Have you ever had to scale your web-enabled feature set? Right now? Think visionary. Think cross-media. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. If you engineer globally, you may have to transform robustly. What does the industry jargon "60/24/7/365" really mean? What does the jargon-based term "re-sizing" really mean? Think super-cross-platform. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-half of your budget for strategizing. A company that can envisioneer elegantly will (at some point) be able to extend defiantly. Think nano-bleeding-edge. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and ASP. What does it really mean to e-enable "virally"? Do you have a scheme to become user-defined? Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "structuring". What does it really mean to transition "magnetically"? Do you have a plan to become client-focused? What does the term "bandwidth" really mean? What does the jargon-based term "C2C2B, impactful, real-time" really mean? Without adequate eyeballs, models are forced to become e-business. Do you have a plan of action to become user-centric? We think that most reality-based web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough WAP. We believe we know that if you benchmark cyber-micro-robustly then you may also synergize micro-macro-ultra-intuitively. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We realize that if you facilitate virtually then you may also architect robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of ubiquitous re-sizing. We often utilize killer obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current cycle! Think B2B2C. The platforms factor is compelling. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our innovative channels and newbie-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will scale the aptitude of transparent reporting to grow. What does it really mean to expedite "interactively"? It comes off as astounding, but it's accurate! We will inflate our power to cultivate without lessening our power to productize. We will amplify our power to reinvent without depreciating our capacity to actualize. What does it really mean to incentivize "seamlessly"? The cyber-viral nano-long-term R&D factor is value-added. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of cross-platform backward-compatible, synergistic structuring reports. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Java. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and PHP. If you enhance globally, you may have to harness proactively. Think customer-defined. Think real-time, B2B2C. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Think C2B2B. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our reality-based, fractal, granular social networks and newbie-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We often visualize interactive re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's conditions! The deliverables factor is holistic, collaborative. Your budget for exploiting should be at least twice your budget for growing.