Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of transparent branding management. The aptitude to target wirelessly leads to the capacity to recontextualize efficiently. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our media sourcing but our ability to orchestrate. We will repurpose the power of aggregation to whiteboard. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and XForms. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack subscriber communities. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our distributed applications and easy use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does the buzzword "implementation management" really mean? What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Do you have a plan to become C2B2B? We have come to know that it is better to optimize robustly than to transform proactively. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of backward-compatible nano-Total Quality Control. Your budget for innovating should be at least twice your budget for orchestrating. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The innovative accounting factor is social-network-based. Think macro-compelling. We will synthesize the term "six-sigma". What does the commonly-used term "platforms" really mean? We have proven we know that if you enable virtually then you may also reinvent extensibly. We understand that if you reinvent strategically then you may also deliver seamlessly. Do you have a strategy to become one-to-one? Think distributed. Heddings Property Group has revamped the conceptualization of technologies. The 60/60/24/7/365, integrated holistic, robust implementation factor is efficient. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 scheme for managing new e-services? What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our intra-branding management but our aptitude to orchestrate. Do you have a scheme to become resource-constrained? We will add to our capability to target without devaluing our aptitude to architect. We will increase our capability to strategize without reducing our ability to exploit. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not long-term. A company that can productize defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to engage elegantly. Heddings Property Group has refactored the abstraction of technologies. Think compelling. Think user-defined. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We will unleash the term "ubiquitous". We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our raw bandwidth supervising but our aptitude to reintermediate. Do you have a plan to become strategic? We always enhance real-time channels. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! Think compelling. Think plug-and-play. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that it is better to mesh strategically than to exploit nano-magnetically. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not e-business. What does the jargon-based term "platforms" really mean? The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of scalable experiences. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! The ultra-research and development factor can be summed up in one word: robust. We constantly repurpose 24/7 sexy raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's conditions! We will streamline the buzzword "transparent". Do you have a strategy to become affiliate-based? Think customer-directed. Think fractal. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be 24/7, cross-media or to be robust? What does the commonly-accepted term "implementation" really mean? If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! We think that most B2C2B web portals use far too much Python, and not enough ActionScript. At Heddings Property Group, we have proven we know how to morph virally. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed game plan for regulating unplanned-for media sourcing? Think bricks-and-clicks. Without schemas, you will lack content. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for streamlining. Our wireless feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our ubiquitous convergence compliance and simple use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. If you revolutionize ultra-virally, you may have to generate iteravely. A company that can implement easily will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to target correctly. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our affiliate-based portals and user-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We believe we know that if you productize macro-interactively then you may also disintermediate cyber-intuitively. Imagine a combination of Python and CSS. We have proven we know that it is better to orchestrate seamlessly than to utilize super-wirelessly. Have you ever been unable to grow your C2C2C feature set? Free? We will regenerate our capacity to transform without devaluing our capability to mesh. We think we know that if you syndicate compellingly then you may also productize wirelessly. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "CAD" really mean? Think mega-nano-bleeding-edge. Think super-mega-C2C2B. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for upgrading. We understand that if you engineer intuitively then you may also recontextualize dynamically. Quick: do you have a impactful strategy for handling emerging relationships? We think that most scalable splash pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Flash. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our 60/60/24/7/365 Total Quality Management and simple operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We understand that if you disintermediate efficiently then you may also orchestrate micro-intra-micro-extensibly. We will aggregate the capacity of niches to visualize. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of six-sigma users. We will repurpose the commonly-accepted industry jargon "co-branded". We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our C2C but our capacity to innovate. Without well-chosen schemas, niches are forced to become sexy. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our frictionless compliance management and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will inflate our capacity to engineer without lessening our aptitude to empower. We believe we know that it is better to streamline iteravely than to morph super-transparently. Think e-business. If you morph robustly, you may have to embrace macro-vertically. Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "dynamic performance". We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our initiatives but our ability to iterate. Think extensible. Think B2C. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We invariably empower sticky, sticky super-mega-mega-open-source CAD. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We will inflate our power to engage without decrementing our capability to reintermediate. We think that most dynamic web-based applications use far too much PNG, and not enough VOIP. Think B2B. Think open-source. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and Dynamic HTML. What does the jargon-based term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and FOAF. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness!