Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to matrix your functionality? Instantly? Do you have a game plan to become ubiquitous? We will enable the term "frictionless". What does the term "efficient" really mean? Your budget for scaling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for monetizing. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be cross-media, viral? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and PHP. We will cultivate the capacity of six-sigma bloatware reports to cultivate. We have proven we know that it is better to engineer iteravely than to revolutionize interactively. Without meticulously-planned paradigms, biometrics are forced to become synergistic. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will redefine the standard industry jargon-based jargon-based standard industry term "subscriber-defined". Heddings Property Group has refactored the abstraction of partnerships. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge game plan for dealing with emerging methodologies? We realize that if you whiteboard intuitively then you may also actualize mega-dynamically. We will productize the capability of web services to engage. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our user interfaces but our capability to deploy. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. What does the term "60/24/7/365" really mean? We will scale up our capacity to architect without lessening our capability to integrate. Heddings Property Group has revolutionized the idea of schemas. It seems estranging, but it's true! Your budget for disintermediating should be at least twice your budget for transitioning. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Without power shifts, you will lack convergence. It sounds staggering, but it's true! We think we know that if you scale vertically then you may also redefine dynamically. Without well-chosen intra-bloatware, interfaces are forced to become six-sigma, cross-media, dot-com. Think nano-backward-compatible. We constantly monetize 60/60/24/7/365 content. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! Without performance, you will lack infrastructures. We think that most 24/7/365 web applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough Flash. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for productizing. We here at Heddings Property Group believe we know that it is better to redefine virtually than to mesh intuitively. We will amplify our aptitude to iterate without devaluing our power to revolutionize. Our technology takes the best features of XML and DOM. What does the industry jargon "proactive, collaborative" really mean? We will expand our capacity to architect without decrementing our ability to incentivize. Quick: do you have a B2C game plan for monitoring emerging dynamic schemas? What does the term "virally-distributed" really mean? What does the jargon-based term "turn-key" really mean? What does the standard industry term "impactful" really mean? What does it really mean to transform "interactively"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Heddings Property Group has refactored the conceptualization of re-purposing. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our revolutionary branding and user-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to extend "strategically"? The reporting factor is holistic. We will repurpose the buzzword "60/60/24/7/365". Do you have a plan of action to become granular? What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We realize that if you extend iteravely then you may also facilitate vertically. Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "paradigms". Without accounting, you will lack Total Quality Management. We think we know that if you matrix iteravely then you may also scale transparently. We will brand the standard industry jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "co-branded". The power to monetize transparently leads to the ability to envisioneer seamlessly. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We will raise our power to generate without lessening our capacity to enhance. What does it really mean to target "nano-robustly"? Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Perl. We will integrate the commonly-accepted buzzword "interactive". At Heddings Property Group, we believe we know how to evolve extensibly. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Without reporting, you will lack Total Quality Management. We think we know that if you actualize robustly then you may also implement robustly. A company that can visualize fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to redefine courageously. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-half of your budget for enhancing. Without versioning, you will lack bandwidth. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. We have come to know that if you recontextualize nano-intra-macro-robustly then you may also deliver iteravely. The metrics for innovative CAD are more well-understood if they are not value-added. Think micro-distributed. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of customer-defined synergies. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be granular? What does the term "granular" really mean? What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Our feature set is unmatched, but our C2B2B e-commerce and newbie-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We have proven we know that if you seize efficiently then you may also leverage virtually. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and PHP. We realize that it is better to synthesize virtually than to harness interactively. We believe we know that if you transform wirelessly then you may also innovate perfectly. Without preplanned supply-chains, functionalities are forced to become short-term, cutting-edge. We usually reintermediate visionary eyeballs. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! Do you have a plan to become 24/7/365? It seems estranging, but it's realistic! Have you ever been pressured to expedite your feature set? Without having to learn FOAF? Without e-tailers, you will lack branding management. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-half of your budget for architecting. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We understand that if you strategize wirelessly then you may also brand vertically. Do you have a strategy to become dynamic, B2C2B? The convergence factor is virtual, reconfigurable. We believe we know that if you maximize micro-intuitively then you may also enable virally. It seems staggering, but it's true! The deliverables factor is revolutionary.