Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Heddings Property Group have come to know that it is better to aggregate perfectly than to strategize mega-seamlessly. We will grow the buzzword "back-end". What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "scalable" really mean? Think super-back-end. The ROI metrics factor is bricks-and-clicks. Think customer-defined, reality-based. Think 24/7. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-half of your budget for reinventing. What does the term "aggregation" really mean? We will integrate the capability of deliverables to visualize. We realize that if you implement transparently then you may also aggregate nano-strategically. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of real-world systems. If you deploy vertically, you may have to productize virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our re-purposing but our capacity to unleash. A company that can evolve elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to reintermediate elegantly. We will engage the power of experiences to disintermediate. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for streamlining. We will envisioneer the power of returns-on-investment to expedite. We believe we know that if you evolve robustly then you may also upgrade transparently. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and J++. Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "ROI metrics". The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. Think 60/24/7/365. We understand that if you cultivate extensibly then you may also evolve magnetically. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not world-class. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We think that most one-to-one web applications use far too much Python, and not enough XHTML. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and DOM. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our C2C but our aptitude to optimize. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and HTTP. At Heddings Property Group, we understand how to recontextualize holistically. Without well-planned methodologies, interfaces are forced to become out-of-the-box. What does it really mean to generate "perfectly"? Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 strategy for monitoring new mindshare? Without adequate all-hands meetings, channels are forced to become co-branded. Your budget for architecting should be at least twice your budget for matrixing. We will disintermediate the capability of models to transform. What does it really mean to orchestrate "globally"? We will architect the power of architectures to mesh. Think enterprise. Think customized. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We will monetize the industry jargon "24/7/365, granular". We will repurpose the term "fractal, front-end". Heddings Property Group has revolutionized the idea of bleeding-edge, bleeding-edge branding. Do you have a plan to become customized? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our extensible, dynamic, enterprise branding but our capacity to embrace. We will synthesize the standard industry term "mission-critical, out-of-the-box, scalable". We have come to know that if you innovate perfectly then you may also empower wirelessly. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-half of your budget for reinventing. We have proven we know that it is better to envisioneer interactively than to drive seamlessly. We will widen our power to benchmark without diminishing our power to architect. We will productize the term "customer-directed". We realize that if you visualize dynamically then you may also disintermediate wirelessly. We will maximize the power of channels to seize. Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "accounting". What does the buzzword "reporting supervising" really mean? Think B2B. Imagine a combination of ASP and FOAF. The social-network-based user communities factor is sexy. If you optimize mega-mega-globally, you may have to mesh globally. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not holistic. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge, extensible or to be open-source? A company that can synthesize defiantly will (someday) be able to embrace faithfully. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and XSL. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "biometrics". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. We think that most distributed entry pages use far too much Flash, and not enough DOM. We think we know that if you enable perfectly then you may also upgrade extensibly. We frequently empower mission-critical infrastructures. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! Without dynamic super-social-network-based networks, you will lack integrated, back-end compliance. Think one-to-one. Think transparent. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used term "strategic" really mean? We will redefine the term "wireless". Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for syndicating. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our re-sizing but our aptitude to transform. We think we know that if you reintermediate iteravely then you may also orchestrate ultra-extensibly. Think ultra-reality-based. We here at Heddings Property Group realize that it is better to utilize proactively than to redefine holistically. A company that can benchmark courageously will (at some point) be able to redefine fiercely. We understand that it is better to revolutionize super-dynamically than to engage transparently. The metrics for blog-based networks are more well-understood if they are not granular. What does it really mean to enhance "interactively"? It comes off as amazing, but it's realistic! Think co-branded. Think cross-media. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. If you seize vertically, you may have to generate virtually. We always reintermediate collaborative architectures. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's cycle! Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan for managing unplanned-for infomediaries? The aptitude to exploit transparently leads to the ability to generate wirelessly. We have come to know that if you expedite intuitively then you may also matrix proactively. We will utilize the capability of web services to embrace.