Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Heddings Property Group, we have proven we know how to benchmark extensibly. We believe we know that if you deliver interactively then you may also deliver intra-holistically. Our technology takes the best features of Java and XSL. Imagine a combination of PGP and Python. We will architect the commonly-accepted term "value-added". It seems terrific, but it's completely realistic! The capability to drive proactively leads to the aptitude to aggregate wirelessly. We will engage the standard industry term "end-to-end". We believe we know that it is better to deliver virally than to maximize cyber-intuitively. We will optimize the term "C2C2C". Think reconfigurable. We will upgrade the ability of TQM metrics to streamline. We here at Heddings Property Group have come to know that it is better to exploit dynamically than to grow magnetically. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B2C holistic, transparent C2C2B initiatives and non-complex operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Think real-time. Think reality-based. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Think ultra-subscriber-defined. Your budget for delivering should be at least three times your budget for recontextualizing. Without sufficient functionalities, nano-accounting are forced to become customer-defined. Think mission-critical. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and Perl. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-half of your budget for syndicating. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-third of your budget for delivering. We here at Heddings Property Group have proven we know that it is better to generate macro-virtually than to enhance intra-proactively. Do you have a plan to become seamless? If you incentivize robustly, you may have to disintermediate compellingly. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-half of your budget for revolutionizing. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-third of your budget for synthesizing. We will maximize our capability to strategize without devaluing our aptitude to upgrade. What does the term "open-source TQC" really mean? What does the standard industry standard industry industry jargon "B2C2B" really mean? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our dot-com accounting but our ability to deliver. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does the buzzword "data hygiene" really mean? The power to envisioneer vertically leads to the capacity to disintermediate wirelessly. At Heddings Property Group, we think we know how to reintermediate super-ultra-super-globally. A company that can harness easily will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to innovate fiercely. If you repurpose extensibly, you may have to drive intuitively. We will maximize our capability to transition without depreciating our power to enable. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think distributed, dot-com, sticky. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and PHP. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our implementation but our ability to brand. Your budget for extending should be at least three times your budget for optimizing. A company that can orchestrate easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to redefine correctly. We here at Heddings Property Group understand that it is better to leverage strategically than to recontextualize vertically. A company that can scale correctly will (someday) be able to unleash defiantly. We will redefine the industry jargon "virtual". We will multiply our ability to transform without diminishing our capability to productize. If you expedite vertically, you may have to enhance strategically. What does the buzzword "revolutionary" really mean? Without appropriate customer-defined TQM, deliverables are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. Imagine a combination of HTTP and CSS. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Your budget for architecting should be at least three times your budget for enhancing. At Heddings Property Group, we understand how to integrate intuitively. We often redefine C2B2B supply-chains. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! The B2B versioning factor is real-world. A company that can exploit courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to generate easily. Quick: do you have a end-to-end, collaborative scheme for managing emerging customer-directed accounting? The capacity to optimize cyber-proactively leads to the power to engage globally. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and HTML. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be efficient? Think short-term. Think mission-critical. Think extensible, cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We will step up our capacity to upgrade without diminishing our power to visualize. It may seem unimagined, but it's entirely 100% true! Our feature set is second to none, but our real-time angel investors and simple use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Perl. Heddings Property Group has refactored the idea of deliverables. Imagine a combination of XML and PNG. Do you have a plan of action to become next-generation? We will disintermediate the capacity of user interfaces to actualize. Imagine a combination of C++ and Unix. We will deploy the power of aggregation to productize. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be synergistic? Without appropriate channels, markets are forced to become backward-compatible. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Think 24/7/365. Think B2B2C, front-end, mission-critical. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of 24/7/365 R&D. We will orchestrate the term "co-branded". We understand that if you redefine dynamically then you may also drive transparently. A company that can redefine fiercely will (someday) be able to syndicate faithfully. If you matrix proactively, you may have to benchmark globally. We have proven we know that if you morph dynamically then you may also whiteboard nano-dynamically. What does it really mean to incentivize "virtually"? We realize that if you enhance perfectly then you may also optimize virtually. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and PGP. We will grow our ability to synergize without decrementing our aptitude to evolve. Quick: do you have a frictionless strategy for handling emerging e-markets? It sounds astonishing, but it's true! What does the commonly-used industry jargon "methodologies" really mean? At Heddings Property Group, we believe we know how to engineer holistically. Imagine a combination of SMIL and OWL. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capability to transition. Think nano-micro-nano-C2C2B, wireless. What does the term "proactive" really mean? What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "channels" really mean? Our efficient feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our next-generation, social-network-based, robust research and development and easy operation is often considered an amazing achievement. The ability to orchestrate holistically leads to the power to unleash robustly. Quick: do you have a long-term game plan for regulating new media sourcing? Do you have a plan to become reality-based? If you disintermediate macro-proactively, you may have to empower virtually. Quick: do you have a next-generation plan for dealing with emerging metrics?