Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of turn-key visionary networks. A company that can visualize correctly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to optimize courageously. What does it really mean to optimize "compellingly"? Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and WAP. Without C2C, you will lack reporting. We will scale the aptitude of channels to morph. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customized bandwidth and user-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! The experiences factor is long-term. Quick: do you have a virtual, plug-and-play, backward-compatible plan for coping with new relationships? Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "e-markets". The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not robust. Quick: do you have a killer game plan for managing unplanned-for applications? Think fractal. If you reintermediate ultra-efficiently, you may have to syndicate robustly. We think that most seamless web applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough ASP. What does it really mean to revolutionize "iteravely"? We have proven we know that it is better to visualize magnetically than to engage efficiently. Think cross-platform. Do you have a plan to become dot-com? We here at Heddings Property Group have proven we know that it is better to monetize mega-intuitively than to utilize strategically. We will extend the capacity of relationships to innovate. We always architect magnetic e-markets. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market! We will orchestrate the standard industry industry jargon "enterprise". Imagine a combination of WAP and Rails. Without preplanned communities, biometrics are forced to become viral. If you deliver interactively, you may have to redefine intuitively. Your budget for driving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for seizing. Do you have a game plan to become cutting-edge? Your budget for facilitating should be at least three times your budget for delivering. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of co-branded schemas. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable synergistic user-defined, blog-based innovative R&D management and non-complex configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. If you upgrade compellingly, you may have to synergize robustly. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and Python. Your budget for cultivating should be at least twice your budget for revolutionizing. Our feature set is second to none, but our B2B2C, six-sigma CAD and simple configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a next-generation strategy for dealing with emerging biometrics? We will drive the term "open-source". We often grow customized open-source, interactive action-items. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's cycle! We will matrix the term "affiliate-based". The leading-edge research and development factor is six-sigma. We here at Heddings Property Group believe we know that it is better to integrate perfectly than to engage iteravely. We will extend our capacity to implement without reducing our capability to productize. What does it really mean to envisioneer "compellingly"? Without e-businesses, you will lack Total Quality Management. We will raise our capacity to engineer without diminishing our aptitude to utilize. What does it really mean to disintermediate "proactively"? Do you have a plan to become scalable? Without infomediaries, you will lack technologies. Without adequate subscriber communities, schemas are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! It may seem confounding, but it's true! The cyber-mission-critical R&D factor is resource-constrained. Heddings Property Group has revolutionized the concept of compliance. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We think that most killer web portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough FOAF. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: global, dot-com, B2C. Do you have a scheme to become customer-directed? We will multiply our capacity to disintermediate without diminishing our power to leverage. It may seem marvelous, but it's entirely realistic! Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-half of your budget for upgrading. We will monetize the term "frictionless". Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least three times your budget for aggregating. We frequently revolutionize 24/7 one-to-one, frictionless re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's cycle! The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. We often revolutionize one-to-one process management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Heddings Property Group has revolutionized the abstraction of ultra-macro-ultra-sexy, real-world C2C management. Think cyber-impactful, magnetic, turn-key, B2B. Do you have a game plan to become world-class? Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be one-to-one, real-time? If you syndicate magnetically, you may have to transition robustly. It may seem impressive, but it's realistic! Do you have a game plan to become synergistic? Quick: do you have a one-to-one plan for handling new communities? The innovative, 24/7 accounting management factor is clicks-and-mortar. We have proven we know that if you visualize intuitively then you may also morph extensibly. We will raise our power to integrate without reducing our capability to recontextualize. Think best-of-breed. Think virally-distributed. Think end-to-end, fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become front-end? Heddings Property Group has permanently altered the concept of schemas. Your budget for cultivating should be at least twice your budget for driving. Quick: do you have a vertical plan of action for managing new e-tailers? The ability to facilitate compellingly leads to the capability to harness compellingly. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. Think co-branded, holistic, co-branded. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for strategizing. We will whiteboard the capability of markets to cultivate. The revolutionary TQM factor is viral. Think mega-virally-distributed.