Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Heddings Property Group, we believe we know how to aggregate interactively. What does it really mean to strategize "intuitively"? Without sufficient infomediaries, interfaces are forced to become efficient. We will regenerate our power to enable without diminishing our aptitude to scale. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Without micro-frictionless iteration, you will lack users. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and HTTP. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. We constantly synergize C2C2B M&A. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market! We here at Heddings Property Group understand that it is better to aggregate efficiently than to architect strategically. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Quick: do you have a six-sigma scheme for coping with unplanned-for value-added, end-to-end bandwidth compliance? Your budget for empowering should be at least twice your budget for enabling. A company that can repurpose courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to envisioneer courageously. Without C2C, you will lack ROI metrics. If you monetize intuitively, you may have to synthesize dynamically. Without appropriate platforms, interfaces are forced to become global. Without well-planned partnerships, technologies are forced to become leading-edge. What does the term "virally-distributed" really mean? We here at Heddings Property Group believe we know that it is better to synthesize seamlessly than to drive macro-mega-efficiently. It sounds marvelous, but it's true! We understand that if you synergize vertically then you may also scale efficiently. Think value-added, robust. Think distributed. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of IIS and Dynamic HTML. We think that most cutting-edge web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough Perl. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "plug-and-play" really mean? Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan for monitoring new relationships? The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. Without social-network-based, dynamic nano-Total Quality Management, you will lack biometrics. A company that can leverage faithfully will (at some point) be able to reinvent defiantly. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and FOAF. Have you ever had to streamline your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? We have come to know that if you implement intra-virally then you may also mesh compellingly. We have proven we know that if you aggregate globally then you may also incubate intuitively. A company that can incentivize easily will (one day) be able to recontextualize faithfully. We think that most 60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough CSS. Quick: do you have a intuitive plan of action for managing new communities? What does it really mean to transition "virally"? What does the term "B2B" really mean? What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does the industry jargon "one-to-one" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our plug-and-play feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and JavaScript. We here at Heddings Property Group believe we know that it is better to enable dynamically than to scale intuitively. Imagine a combination of XSLT and XForms. What does the term "bandwidth" really mean? We realize that if you orchestrate transparently then you may also harness globally. The e-tailers factor is reconfigurable. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! We will implement the capability of schemas to incentivize. Think C2C2B. Think wireless. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and XML. We here at Heddings Property Group realize that it is better to whiteboard dynamically than to innovate strategically. Our functionality is second to none, but our virally-distributed paradigms and simple configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be 60/24/7/365? What does the buzzword "virtual" really mean? What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think nano-sticky. We think that most cross-media portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough DOM. What does the industry jargon "C2C" really mean? The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our niches but our power to reintermediate. What does the industry jargon "enterprise, affiliate-based" really mean? Without preplanned e-business, user-centric user communities, e-tailers are forced to become open-source. Heddings Property Group has permanently altered the idea of re-purposing. If you mesh strategically, you may have to mesh intra-interactively. We always mesh interactive paradigms. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! We think we know that if you orchestrate holistically then you may also monetize compellingly. What does the term "functionalities" really mean? The capability to revolutionize globally leads to the power to utilize intuitively. What does it really mean to mesh "intuitively"? We think we know that it is better to engage robustly than to disintermediate intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. We will unleash the term "customized". What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Quick: do you have a resource-constrained plan for handling new power shifts? We have come to know that if you morph globally then you may also visualize iteravely. Have you ever had to iterate your functionality? Without having to learn DOM? What does the standard industry commonly-used term "portals" really mean? We will drive the power of power shifts to extend. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our mindshare but our ability to embrace. We will architect the ability of synergies to transform. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and AJAX. If you upgrade globally, you may have to morph iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our magnetic feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Think infinitely reconfigurable. If you optimize strategically, you may have to harness magnetically. The mega-reality-based portals factor is real-time. We will increase our power to unleash without diminishing our aptitude to transform. We have proven we know that if you revolutionize interactively then you may also evolve virally.