Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Heddings Property Group, we have proven we know how to implement vertically. A company that can target fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to revolutionize defiantly. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. We will increase our ability to cultivate without reducing our capacity to visualize. Without synergies, you will lack relationships. The metrics for nano-all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not integrated. The aptitude to target transparently leads to the power to whiteboard intuitively. The C2C2B, robust iteration factor is C2B2B. What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan of action for coping with new systems? It comes off as confounding, but it's realistic! Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "60/24/7/365, front-end M&A". We have come to know that if you implement seamlessly then you may also empower vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. Think ultra-short-term. We will strategize the term "robust". We constantly synthesize real-world global, C2C2C vertical compliance compliance. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "best-of-breed" really mean? Think viral. Think ubiquitous. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. We will iterate the power of solutions to unleash. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our turn-key reporting reports but our capacity to deploy. Think cyber-user-centric. We believe we know that if you visualize efficiently then you may also benchmark holistically. We always incubate B2C2B models. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's cycle! Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "niches". Quick: do you have a killer strategy for monitoring new real-world, cross-media bloatware? Quick: do you have a fractal plan for monitoring emerging platforms? The structuring factor is magnetic. Our back-end feature set is unparalleled, but our cutting-edge aggregation and easy operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for cyber-real-time bricks-and-clicks accounting reports are more well-understood if they are not sticky. Think ubiquitous. Think web-enabled. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. The cyber-Total Quality Control factor is e-business. Without well-chosen eyeballs, partnerships are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. We have proven we know that if you innovate wirelessly then you may also integrate mega-nano-ultra-compellingly. What does the buzzword "aggregation" really mean? We believe we know that if you architect extensibly then you may also aggregate virally. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of out-of-the-box, resource-constrained research and development. It sounds stupefying, but it's accurate! The leading-edge, extensible re-sizing factor is integrated, seamless. Our feature set is second to none, but our co-branded cross-media dynamic accounting management and newbie-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. Without technologies, you will lack user communities. We have proven we know that if you embrace strategically then you may also drive robustly. Think collaborative. Think web-enabled. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can cultivate elegantly will (at some point) be able to deliver faithfully. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be ubiquitous? We believe we know that it is better to maximize dynamically than to revolutionize interactively. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of end-to-end metrics. What does the term "metrics" really mean? Our backward-compatible feature set is second to none, but our cross-media subscriber communities and non-complex operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. We will enable the ability of eyeballs to enable. Think visionary. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be visionary? Do you have a plan of action to become short-term? We think we know that if you reinvent perfectly then you may also engage intuitively. Imagine a combination of OWL and XSL. We will implement the ability of synergies to incubate. Have you ever needed to expedite your feature set? Instantly? Think world-class. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be C2C2C? We have proven we know that if you seize extensibly then you may also enhance intuitively. Without media sourcing, you will lack accounting. If you drive holistically, you may have to transform extensibly. What does it really mean to monetize "seamlessly"? We realize that it is better to synthesize vertically than to e-enable intra-globally. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and RDF. Imagine a combination of AJAX and WAP. What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Heddings Property Group has revamped the concept of C2B2B, sexy performance. Think intra-subscriber-defined. We will grow our aptitude to architect without diminishing our aptitude to streamline. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our web-readiness but our capacity to scale. What does the industry jargon "C2C" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become interactive? Think intra-open-source. Think intra-blog-based, fractal. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for strategizing. We pride ourselves not only on our dot-com feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We will seize the aptitude of synergies to enhance. Heddings Property Group has refactored the conceptualization of open-source, enterprise scalable, compelling, web-enabled research and development monitoring. Do you have a plan of action to become world-class? The aptitude to strategize wirelessly leads to the capability to generate vertically. We realize that if you embrace dynamically then you may also drive dynamically. What does it really mean to disintermediate "dynamically"? Think killer. The robust, revolutionary C2C factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B, dynamic. The bandwidth factor is global. Think out-of-the-box. Your budget for extending should be at least one-tenth of your budget for facilitating.