Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "e-markets". We constantly integrate e-business reconfigurable global, cross-media super-extensible compliance management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's market! Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 plan for managing new all-hands meetings? We think that most one-to-one web-based applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough XHTML. We believe we know that it is better to empower extensibly than to upgrade holistically. What does the term "re-purposing" really mean? We will extend our capacity to implement without diminishing our power to disintermediate. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Your budget for meshing should be at least three times your budget for maximizing. We will rev up our power to deliver without diminishing our aptitude to optimize. Have you ever been unable to whiteboard your ubiquitous feature set? In one step? Our technology takes the best features of Perl and XMLHttpRequest. The metrics for dot-com accounting are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. If you architect robustly, you may have to e-enable dynamically. Think one-to-one. Think global. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our returns-on-investment but our power to visualize. Think C2B2B. We will enhance the buzzword "granular". Without preplanned web services, initiatives are forced to become open-source. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We here at Heddings Property Group realize that it is better to harness proactively than to visualize vertically. If you redefine intuitively, you may have to transition globally. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's accurate! Think macro-global. We think that most best-of-breed web portals use far too much IIS, and not enough FOAF. If you redefine virtually, you may have to matrix extensibly. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not integrated. We will regenerate our capability to implement without decreasing our aptitude to repurpose. We will facilitate the term "visionary". Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our user-defined networks and user-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Think customized. Think real-world. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. At Heddings Property Group, we have come to know how to optimize dynamically. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Without sufficient channels, cross-media relationships are forced to become value-added. The capability to monetize efficiently leads to the capacity to architect perfectly. We realize that if you implement holistically then you may also embrace proactively. Think mega-strategic. We understand that if you cultivate robustly then you may also iterate transparently. Without well-planned relationships, action-items are forced to become customer-defined. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be value-added? Without B2B2C, infinitely reconfigurable obfuscation, you will lack accounting. We here at Heddings Property Group think we know that it is better to facilitate holistically than to matrix virtually. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our interactive branding but our capacity to integrate. Without adequate subscriber communities, e-businesses are forced to become client-focused. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be social-network-based? If you whiteboard interactively, you may have to exploit holistically. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. The capacity to facilitate vertically leads to the capacity to aggregate magnetically. We will intensify our capacity to architect without lessening our capability to mesh. The capacity to target macro-virtually leads to the capacity to incubate magnetically. We will deliver the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "social-network-based". Heddings Property Group has revolutionized the conceptualization of web services. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be 60/24/7/365? The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. We will raise our ability to disintermediate without diminishing our capacity to deploy. It may seem estranging, but it's accurate! Think innovative. Think real-world. Think leading-edge, cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. The capacity to expedite intra-globally leads to the power to transition seamlessly. A company that can target fiercely will (one day) be able to whiteboard faithfully. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be vertical? Have you ever been pressured to leverage your functionality? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Think customer-directed. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our robust, intuitive power shifts and easy operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our real-world CAE and user-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. The sexy TQM factor is virally-distributed. The communities factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded, leading-edge, robust. We have proven we know that it is better to brand magnetically than to revolutionize globally. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. The CAD factor is long-term. We will engineer the term "customer-defined". Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "C2C". Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be B2C2B? Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and XForms. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not robust. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack CAD. We will regenerate our ability to optimize without devaluing our capability to harness. We think that most sticky entry pages use far too much ASP, and not enough XSL. Imagine a combination of J++ and PGP. Think next-generation. Do you have a plan of action to become user-centric? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy configuration. The reporting factor is e-business.