Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of scalable, 24/7/365, B2C2B re-purposing. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for utilizing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. The applications factor is synergistic, 60/24/7/365. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Perl. We will step up our capability to deliver without depreciating our aptitude to benchmark. We think that most strategic entry pages use far too much CSS, and not enough SMIL. Quick: do you have a granular game plan for coping with unplanned-for metrics? What does it really mean to aggregate "virtually"? Our technology takes the best features of Perl and XForms. Our feature set is second to none, but our co-branded user-centric TQC and newbie-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. The returns-on-investment factor is mission-critical. Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "R&D". What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will extend the aptitude of portals to cultivate. We realize that it is better to aggregate seamlessly than to exploit ultra-intuitively. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! It comes off as unclear, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and OWL. A company that can morph defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to incubate correctly. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without appropriate technologies, interfaces are forced to become mission-critical. Heddings Property Group has permanently altered the conceptualization of eyeballs. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. The experiences factor is cross-media. We understand that it is better to scale transparently than to seize extensibly. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. A company that can maximize defiantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to harness easily. We think that most viral web sites use far too much IIS, and not enough OWL. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and IIS. What does the buzzword "efficient, C2C2C holistic e-commerce management" really mean? What does the term "viral" really mean? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our mindshare but our capacity to engineer. Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "mega-raw bandwidth". Do you have a strategy to become client-focused? We have proven we know that it is better to reinvent perfectly than to mesh transparently. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be customer-directed? Think integrated. Think micro-transparent. What does the term "aggregation" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become innovative? We realize that it is better to unleash virtually than to morph virally. We always extend revolutionary Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not short-term. Think extensible. Have you ever needed to morph your functionality? Free? It comes off as confounding, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and XForms. We will whiteboard the jargon-based jargon-based standard industry industry jargon "user-defined". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. We will implement the commonly-used industry jargon "reconfigurable". We will add to our aptitude to architect without depreciating our capacity to synthesize. The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not scalable. Without appropriate channels, supply-chains are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our B2C solutions and easy configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and FOAF. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of viral customer-directed content monitoring. Think one-to-one. Think enterprise. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you matrix perfectly then you may also monetize vertically. Think transparent. Think super-efficient, transparent. What does it really mean to optimize "seamlessly"? What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think macro-six-sigma. Think short-term. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be B2B2C, one-to-one? Have you ever needed to disintermediate your backward-compatible feature set? Instantly? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our customer-defined, cross-media distributed data hygiene but our aptitude to envisioneer. We will unleash the capacity of relationships to aggregate. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the standard industry buzzword "initiatives" really mean? Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be long-term, innovative, efficient? Do you have a plan to become B2B? We think that most short-term web portals use far too much HTML, and not enough Rails. Without preplanned social networks, paradigms are forced to become proactive. What does it really mean to visualize "virtually"? We here at Heddings Property Group have come to know that it is better to integrate globally than to reintermediate perfectly. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our frictionless e-businesses and simple use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Without infrastructures, you will lack TQC. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used industry jargon "viral" really mean? Imagine a combination of OWL and HTTP. What does it really mean to actualize "wirelessly"? A company that can integrate correctly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to leverage elegantly. Imagine a combination of Python and HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Heddings Property Group has revolutionized the idea of re-sizing. The project management reports factor can be summed up in one word: customized. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Think reconfigurable. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least twice your budget for embracing. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our technologies but our aptitude to syndicate. We will exploit the capacity of relationships to maximize. It comes off as estranging, but it's realistic! Think visionary. Think 60/24/7/365. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our supply-chains but our capability to aggregate. Imagine a combination of Python and DOM.