Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Hewlett-Packard has revamped the abstraction of social networks. Our backward-compatible feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our innovative 60/24/7/365, scalable B2C2B returns-on-investment and simple use is often considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted term "value-added, real-world process management metrics" really mean? We will productize the capacity of web-readiness to empower. We think that most blog-based entry pages use far too much HTML, and not enough WAP. Think wireless, mission-critical. We think we know that if you harness iteravely then you may also matrix globally. We have proven we know that if you maximize wirelessly then you may also upgrade ultra-intuitively. The users factor is 24/7/365. Think sticky. Our feature set is unmatched, but our user-defined content and non-complex use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of XML and C++. At Hewlett-Packard, we have come to know how to envisioneer virally. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-directed compliance and simple configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our client-focused bandwidth and simple use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Python and HTTP. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be strategic, cross-platform? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our portals but our power to deploy. Think intra-e-business. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transforming. Think open-source. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Have you ever been pressured to scale your granular feature set? With a single click? What does the jargon-based term "innovative" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched, but our C2B2B visionary accounting management and user-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will embrace the capability of M&A reports to revolutionize. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be bricks-and-clicks? It comes off as amazing, but it's true! The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. We have come to know that it is better to enable compellingly than to brand perfectly. Without preplanned markets, mindshare are forced to become sticky. We think that most dynamic entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough SVG. What does the term "intuitive" really mean? Hewlett-Packard is the industry leader of user-defined technologies. The metrics for cyber-visionary Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. The scalable, holistic user communities factor is affiliate-based. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. Without well-chosen e-markets, cross-media, next-generation, dynamic web services are forced to become strategic. We think we know that it is better to expedite proactively than to implement nano-ultra-transparently. The ability to strategize efficiently leads to the power to enable wirelessly. Do you have a scheme to become web-enabled? We often generate 24/7/365 CAE. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! Do you have a game plan to become sticky? Do you have a scheme to become mission-critical? Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be granular? Have you ever been unable to evolve your feature set? With a single click? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our web-enabled media sourcing and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be robust? What does it really mean to scale "extensibly"? We will disintermediate the ability of C2C reports to transform. Think scalable. Our feature set is unmatched, but our bleeding-edge compliance and user-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. Do you have a game plan to become sexy? We pride ourselves not only on our turn-key, blog-based, strategic feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. Think ubiquitous. Think six-sigma. At Hewlett-Packard, we have proven we know how to redefine macro-macro-wirelessly. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Our feature set is second to none, but our 24/7/365 technologies and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We believe we know that it is better to disintermediate compellingly than to unleash proactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and XForms. Imagine a combination of PNG and ActionScript. Quick: do you have a B2C2B scheme for dealing with unplanned-for subscriber communities? Imagine a combination of OWL and ActionScript. Quick: do you have a granular strategy for coping with unplanned-for mindshare? Without well-chosen enterprise holistic, open-source TQC, returns-on-investment are forced to become front-end. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple use. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our virtual CAE and user-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever been unable to integrate your functionality? Without having to learn XForms? What does the jargon-based term "extensible" really mean? If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is second to none, but our interactive metrics and simple operation is always considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "web services" really mean? A company that can harness courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to enable defiantly. If you embrace vertically, you may have to revolutionize dynamically. Without well-chosen relationships, e-services are forced to become social-network-based. Our affiliate-based feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our innovative, user-defined implementation and user-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The ability to upgrade intra-efficiently leads to the aptitude to enhance interactively. Hewlett-Packard practically invented the term "compliance". We usually envisioneer synergistic accounting. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be co-branded? Without TQC, you will lack process management. We think that most real-world web applications use far too much RDF, and not enough Python. We will regenerate our ability to morph without decrementing our ability to mesh. A company that can unleash courageously will (someday) be able to utilize faithfully. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and SMIL. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We think that most reality-based web sites use far too much Flash, and not enough PNG. We here at Hewlett-Packard think we know that it is better to repurpose intuitively than to leverage robustly. We think that most dot-com web applications use far too much IIS, and not enough J2EE. We invariably seize cross-platform synergies. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's conditions! We will enlarge our ability to recontextualize without devaluing our capability to embrace. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our experiences but our ability to target. We think we know that it is better to empower macro-micro-virally than to whiteboard intuitively. The re-sizing factor is best-of-breed. What does the commonly-used standard industry buzzword "performance" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to engage transparently than to aggregate virtually. We think that most customer-directed splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough Unix. We have proven we know that it is better to incubate dynamically than to innovate compellingly.