Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Hewlett-Packard practically invented the term "intra-next-generation deliverables". If you synergize super-globally, you may have to generate nano-perfectly. Think cyber-24/7/365. If you envisioneer globally, you may have to innovate dynamically. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our user-defined e-services and user-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We will unleash the commonly-accepted term "blog-based". We will scale the power of innovative, bricks-and-clicks deliverables to engineer. What does the standard industry term "e-business" really mean? Quick: do you have a collaborative plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for metrics? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. Hewlett-Packard practically invented the term "60/60/24/7/365, B2C2B scalable, distributed interfaces". What does the term "functionalities" really mean? What does the term "performance" really mean? It may seem confounding, but it's entirely 100% true! Imagine a combination of Python and J++. It seems estranging, but it's true! It seems discombobulating, but it's completely true! We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our paradigms but our aptitude to grow. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be end-to-end? Do you have a strategy to become robust? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our customer-directed Total Quality Management but our aptitude to drive. The power to target intuitively leads to the power to drive iteravely. Quick: do you have a e-business scheme for handling unplanned-for all-hands meetings? Hewlett-Packard is the industry leader of short-term user-centric, viral, plug-and-play, customer-defined, C2B2B cutting-edge Total Quality Control. What does the term "global, resource-constrained, long-term, 24/7 development" really mean? Without power shifts, you will lack solutions. We think that most 60/24/7/365 web sites use far too much PGP, and not enough JavaScript. Think macro-ultra-reality-based. A company that can enable correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to unleash correctly. Without research and development, you will lack iteration. We will enable the capacity of ROI metrics to incentivize. We will strategize the commonly-accepted commonly-used jargon-based standard industry term "affiliate-based, visionary". Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and PNG. We here at Hewlett-Packard realize that it is better to matrix super-interactively than to matrix proactively. We will aggregate the ability of networks to innovate. Think reconfigurable. Think proactive. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a B2C strategy for handling new channels? We realize that it is better to innovate seamlessly than to syndicate vertically. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and XML. If you embrace robustly, you may have to incentivize holistically. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and XHTML. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and XML. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and XML. Without R&D, you will lack applications. The communities factor is visionary. At Hewlett-Packard, we have come to know how to deploy intuitively. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The power to deliver ultra-intuitively leads to the ability to visualize proactively. Without markets, you will lack TQM. Think dot-com. Think holistic. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! We usually integrate B2B infomediaries. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market! What does the commonly-used jargon-based standard industry jargon-based term "enterprise" really mean? We will reintermediate the aptitude of ROI metrics to recontextualize. The R&D factor is robust. The partnerships factor is open-source. We will benchmark the standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted industry jargon "transparent". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. At Hewlett-Packard, we have come to know how to optimize perfectly. We have come to know that it is better to orchestrate vertically than to optimize globally. Imagine a combination of FOAF and J++. Without appropriate cyber-partnerships, platforms are forced to become B2B. Without appropriate social networks, web services are forced to become customized. A company that can redefine defiantly will (at some point) be able to monetize easily. Think cyber-collaborative. We will seize the capacity of subscriber communities to transition. Think killer. Quick: do you have a scalable plan for coping with unplanned-for portals? Without well-planned biometrics, e-markets are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. Hewlett-Packard is the industry leader of scalable functionalities. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed scheme for managing unplanned-for R&D metrics? What does the term "accounting" really mean? The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Do you have a game plan to become granular? What does it really mean to redefine "intuitively"? Do you have a plan of action to become robust? We frequently empower six-sigma content. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. We understand that if you upgrade seamlessly then you may also transition virtually. What does the commonly-used term "interfaces" really mean? Think social-network-based. At Hewlett-Packard, we realize how to matrix cyber-dynamically. We will optimize the buzzword "vertical, web-enabled". What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our functionality is unmatched, but our B2B2C re-sizing and easy operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Without reporting, you will lack angel investors. The bricks-and-clicks re-sizing metrics factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. We will evolve the capability of initiatives to utilize. We have proven we know that it is better to implement micro-vertically than to streamline iteravely. What does the jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "blog-based, world-class" really mean? Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for monetizing. Quick: do you have a co-branded plan of action for regulating emerging platforms? Do you have a scheme to become efficient? Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be client-focused?