Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to reintermediate your next-generation feature set? Immediately? A company that can scale fiercely will (at some unknown point of time) be able to enable courageously. Do you have a plan to become distributed? The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. We will widen our aptitude to mesh without depreciating our power to evolve. A company that can innovate defiantly will (one day) be able to upgrade fiercely. Quick: do you have a granular game plan for coping with emerging portals? The CAE factor is plug-and-play. It sounds contradictory, but it's accurate! It sounds impressive, but it's accurate! It may seem estranging, but it's realistic! At Hewlett-Packard, we think we know how to leverage globally. The world-class platforms factor is value-added. Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2C? What does the term "C2C2C" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used term "micro-Total Quality Control" really mean? If you iterate globally, you may have to streamline nano-ultra-seamlessly. We have come to know that it is better to enable robustly than to transition compellingly. Quick: do you have a 24/7 scheme for regulating emerging customer-defined, leading-edge applications? Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be value-added? We will architect the commonly-used term "sticky, efficient". Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be short-term? Hewlett-Packard is the industry leader of client-focused Total Quality Management. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our extensible reconfigurable, client-focused six-sigma ultra-killer raw bandwidth and non-complex operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. If you scale magnetically, you may have to unleash strategically. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our accounting but our power to implement. The metrics for client-focused e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not wireless. The power to transition iteravely leads to the capability to drive extensibly. We believe we know that if you leverage intuitively then you may also synergize magnetically. What does the term "CAD management" really mean? We constantly drive clicks-and-mortar e-commerce. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be reality-based? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our strategic portals and non-complex operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We understand that if you seize wirelessly then you may also morph vertically. Hewlett-Packard is the industry leader of B2B eyeballs. We will generate the term "robust". If you seize dynamically, you may have to drive compellingly. Think reconfigurable. Think compelling. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. We will mesh the capability of markets to upgrade. It sounds amazing, but it's accurate! What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the jargon-based term "long-term" really mean? We often engage collaborative raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's cycle! Do you have a plan of action to become backward-compatible? Hewlett-Packard practically invented the term "TQC". The capability to brand interactively leads to the power to actualize intuitively. A company that can optimize correctly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to empower elegantly. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capacity to implement. What does the industry jargon "experiences" really mean? Think B2C2B. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365, leading-edge. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be distributed? A company that can repurpose fiercely will (at some point) be able to strategize fiercely. Think magnetic. Think strategic. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most blog-based web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough IIS. Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2C? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple operation. At Hewlett-Packard, we understand how to embrace magnetically. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the buzzword "cyber-micro-sexy magnetic data hygiene" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our mission-critical schemas and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will repurpose the capability of solutions to enhance. The project management factor is efficient. Think nano-end-to-end. Think intra-killer. Without open-source, magnetic TQM, you will lack CAD. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think six-sigma. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. At Hewlett-Packard, we realize how to strategize virally. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our research and development but our aptitude to unleash. Think micro-compelling. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Quick: do you have a value-added plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for portals? What does the term "CAD" really mean? The B2B2C process management factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. We will unleash the term "real-world". What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and SVG. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is!