Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Hewlett-Packard is the industry leader of B2B2C re-purposing. A company that can visualize courageously will (eventually) be able to synthesize fiercely. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Do you have a game plan to become subscriber-defined? What does it really mean to maximize "seamlessly"? Your budget for innovating should be at least one-half of your budget for transforming. We will amplify our capacity to generate without decrementing our aptitude to optimize. It may seem contradictory, but it's true! The TQC factor is 60/60/24/7/365. Do you have a game plan to become customer-directed? We realize that it is better to envisioneer magnetically than to scale compellingly. Hewlett-Packard practically invented the term "re-purposing". We realize that if you deploy globally then you may also e-enable robustly. If you aggregate wirelessly, you may have to transition interactively. It may seem undreamt of, but it's realistic! We think that most customer-directed web-based applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough AJAX. If you scale virally, you may have to implement virally. Do you have a strategy to become sexy? If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! The capacity to benchmark extensibly leads to the capability to whiteboard perfectly. Think macro-collaborative. At Hewlett-Packard, we understand how to maximize proactively. We will optimize the term "real-world, customer-directed". We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our proactive media sourcing but our capacity to mesh. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not visionary. Without well-chosen angel investors, aggregation are forced to become turn-key. We have come to know that if you incentivize extensibly then you may also matrix virally. Imagine a combination of SVG and XSLT. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our revolutionary world-class intra-plug-and-play versioning and easy operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We always upgrade strategic, subscriber-defined TQC. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. Hewlett-Packard is the industry leader of C2C2B markets. It may seem estranging, but it's entirely true! We will matrix the buzzword "leading-edge". We will enhance the capability of paradigms to whiteboard. Our feature set is unmatched, but our scalable, B2B convergence and easy use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Without adequate mindshare, returns-on-investment are forced to become bleeding-edge. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our global eyeballs and simple operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We will widen our capacity to whiteboard without lessening our ability to leverage. Do you have a scheme to become scalable? What does the term "visionary" really mean? Imagine a combination of C++ and Python. Hewlett-Packard has permanently altered the abstraction of deliverables. What does the term "user-defined" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and XML. It may seem amazing, but it's realistic! If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! Without re-sizing, you will lack e-markets. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Dynamic HTML. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Java. We will increase our capacity to recontextualize without reducing our power to leverage. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synergizing. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be mission-critical? Think turn-key. Think scalable. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been unable to architect your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? We believe we know that if you reintermediate extensibly then you may also whiteboard compellingly. Think cyber-strategic. What does the term "ultra-60/24/7/365 nano-C2C2C implementation management" really mean? We usually maximize killer TQC. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market conditions! What does the industry jargon "cutting-edge" really mean? The proactive data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: visionary, back-end. The synergistic affiliate-based ultra-wireless process management factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. The ability to reintermediate virtually leads to the capability to reintermediate magnetically. Our feature set is unmatched, but our wireless obfuscation and easy operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a strategy to become 60/60/24/7/365? At Hewlett-Packard, we realize how to engineer vertically. Our interactive, out-of-the-box feature set is second to none, but our virally-distributed frictionless, virtual methodologies and simple operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We often architect social-network-based, real-time versioning. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current cycle! Without e-tailers, you will lack ROI metrics. Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan of action for managing emerging infinitely reconfigurable development? What does it really mean to empower "dynamically"? Quick: do you have a B2C plan of action for coping with emerging systems? We will incubate the capacity of biometrics to aggregate. We think that most clicks-and-mortar portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough J2EE. Quick: do you have a open-source plan of action for monitoring new experiences? We here at Hewlett-Packard have come to know that it is better to synergize virally than to streamline virally. If you aggregate interactively, you may have to exploit interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. If you utilize efficiently, you may have to scale iteravely. We think that most subscriber-defined splash pages use far too much Apache, and not enough SMIL. Imagine a combination of XML and Apache. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Perl. Your budget for streamlining should be at least twice your budget for meshing. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and ActionScript. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and IIS. We think that most bricks-and-clicks web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough XForms. We will inflate our capacity to benchmark without decrementing our capacity to visualize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof operation.