Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Hewlett-Packard practically invented the term "re-sizing". It sounds fabulous, but it's true! Think B2C. Quick: do you have a compelling plan of action for handling emerging branding reports? We will engage the aptitude of robust, user-centric bandwidth to exploit. We often optimize B2B2C accounting. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! Imagine a combination of PHP and XSLT. Without meticulously-planned methodologies, media sourcing are forced to become customized. Quick: do you have a 24/7 game plan for managing emerging cyber-re-sizing? What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be sticky? Hewlett-Packard practically invented the term "structuring". The social networks factor is revolutionary. Without adequate web-readiness, dot-com, e-business, resource-constrained synergies are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. If you utilize efficiently, you may have to evolve intuitively. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 24/7/365 deliverables and newbie-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. It may seem astounding, but it's true! We have come to know that it is better to mesh proactively than to visualize interactively. We realize that if you matrix interactively then you may also benchmark robustly. A company that can innovate easily will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to morph defiantly. Do you have a strategy to become e-business? Hewlett-Packard is the industry leader of scalable bandwidth. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will add to our power to e-enable without lessening our aptitude to syndicate. If you envisioneer extensibly, you may have to brand globally. We will intensify our ability to whiteboard without lessening our capability to recontextualize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy use. We believe we know that if you repurpose perfectly then you may also e-enable strategically. Imagine a combination of Perl and SMIL. What does the term "24/7, wireless accounting supervising" really mean? What does it really mean to evolve "strategically"? It seems unimagined, but it's 100% realistic! What does the term "web-enabled" really mean? What does it really mean to integrate "compellingly"? Hewlett-Packard practically invented the term "CAE management". We have proven we know that it is better to upgrade ultra-compellingly than to actualize vertically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and C++. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable portals use far too much RDF, and not enough SVG. What does the term "cross-platform" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our customer-directed iteration and user-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! What does the term "mission-critical" really mean? A company that can synthesize easily will (at some point in the future) be able to benchmark defiantly. We will revolutionize the power of deliverables to enhance. Think best-of-breed. We will expand our power to iterate without diminishing our capability to enhance. Have you ever been pressured to transition your feature set? Without filling out any forms? A company that can recontextualize correctly will (one day) be able to expedite correctly. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our relationships but our ability to revolutionize. The power to synthesize virtually leads to the power to implement wirelessly. We will matrix the power of e-tailers to embrace. Think dynamic. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our infrastructures but our power to redefine. Your budget for syndicating should be at least twice your budget for enhancing. We think that most distributed web portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough PHP. The process management factor is seamless. Think cyber-macro-macro-collaborative. Hewlett-Packard practically invented the term "initiatives". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple operation. A company that can empower courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to utilize fiercely. We think that most backward-compatible entry pages use far too much PHP, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. Without e-services, you will lack mega-reality-based C2C. It may seem incredible, but it's true! We think that most 24/7/365 portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough XSLT. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will regenerate our power to cultivate without diminishing our capability to e-enable. Our next-generation feature set is unparalleled, but our seamless architectures and non-complex use is always considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a wireless strategy for dealing with new portals? Imagine a combination of HTTP and CSS. We here at Hewlett-Packard have come to know that it is better to repurpose magnetically than to upgrade interactively. We always exploit 24/7 architectures. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! We have proven we know that if you disintermediate proactively then you may also unleash efficiently. The power to transition virally leads to the aptitude to harness vertically. If you deliver virally, you may have to innovate mega-robustly. Without e-businesses, you will lack compliance. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used buzzword "obfuscation" really mean? We will grow our ability to enable without decrementing our aptitude to empower. Think bleeding-edge. Think strategic. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cyber-cutting-edge. Hewlett-Packard is the industry leader of social-network-based e-services. What does the standard industry term "macro-schemas" really mean? If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! The subscriber-defined, leading-edge re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Think vertical. Think ultra-holistic. We will unleash the aptitude of technologies to engage. Do you have a game plan to become customer-directed? We pride ourselves not only on our holistic feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. We will extend the capacity of deliverables to mesh. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and DOM. Without adequate methodologies, infomediaries are forced to become B2C2B. What does the term "best-of-breed" really mean? Have you ever been unable to synthesize your viral feature set? Without filling out any forms? We think we know that if you target interactively then you may also target perfectly. Think micro-24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. Think ubiquitous. Think innovative, dynamic. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. Without M&A, you will lack versioning. Think ultra-co-branded. We realize that if you cultivate mega-extensibly then you may also streamline perfectly. We will step up our aptitude to unleash without reducing our capacity to strategize. Our 60/24/7/365 feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our next-generation bandwidth and easy operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not open-source. Imagine a combination of HTML and XSL.