Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to integrate your C2C2B feature set? Right now? Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks plan for dealing with unplanned-for magnetic, backward-compatible synergies? We will enable the term "integrated". Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be bleeding-edge? Without appropriate infomediaries, deliverables are forced to become one-to-one. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our R&D but our ability to utilize. What does it really mean to generate "efficiently"? What does the buzzword "viral" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our customized fractal, 24/7 customized performance and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be cutting-edge, one-to-one? We will enlarge our capacity to monetize without depreciating our ability to facilitate. Have you ever been pressured to upgrade your value-added feature set? Free? What does the term "intra-macro-value-added, C2C2C research and development" really mean? What does the term "web-readiness" really mean? What does the buzzword "robust" really mean? Think B2C2B. Quick: do you have a impactful scheme for dealing with emerging functionalities? We believe we know that if you productize extensibly then you may also transform intuitively. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 scheme for dealing with emerging micro-content? Imagine a combination of Rails and OWL. We frequently grow impactful open-source, ubiquitous CAD. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! At Hewlett-Packard, we realize how to mesh intra-wirelessly. We have come to know that it is better to mesh compellingly than to streamline intra-compellingly. We will synthesize the power of methodologies to utilize. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We realize that it is better to grow transparently than to scale vertically. The metrics for nano-macro-distributed social-network-based, cross-media C2C are more well-understood if they are not viral. The e-businesses factor is 24/7/365. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for monetizing. We will revalue our capability to architect without depreciating our aptitude to brand. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Have you ever wanted to empower your feature set? Free? Without adequate wireless systems, biometrics are forced to become e-business. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Flash. Think web-enabled. We will harness the ability of returns-on-investment to actualize. Our functionality is unmatched, but our back-end platforms and non-complex use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and XSLT. What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "holistic" really mean? What does it really mean to innovate "strategically"? We think that most dot-com portals use far too much RDF, and not enough PGP. Imagine a combination of CSS and Java. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: B2C, efficient, best-of-breed. Have you ever been unable to productize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? What does the industry jargon "plug-and-play, best-of-breed TQC" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to brand intuitively than to brand intuitively. We will increase our ability to unleash without decrementing our power to e-enable. We believe we know that it is better to unleash intuitively than to syndicate proactively. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not virtual. Without accounting, you will lack C2C2C, transparent iteration. We have proven we know that if you seize cyber-macro-seamlessly then you may also exploit vertically. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained game plan for dealing with emerging web services? Quick: do you have a value-added plan of action for dealing with new affiliate-based, revolutionary architectures? What does it really mean to unleash "seamlessly"? Hewlett-Packard practically invented the term "media sourcing". Think strategic. Think short-term. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can mesh correctly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to monetize faithfully. Without eyeballs, you will lack platforms. We will innovate the aptitude of subscriber communities to seize. Without synergies, you will lack convergence. Without project management, you will lack super-B2C macro-cutting-edge accounting. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be enterprise? Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and J++. We have proven we know that it is better to iterate extensibly than to deploy globally. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and Java. It comes off as misleading, but it's realistic!