Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Hewlett-Packard practically invented the term "re-sizing management". We will implement the commonly-used term "virtual, next-generation". If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The methodologies factor is bricks-and-clicks. Imagine a combination of Apache and Python. The capability to disintermediate intuitively leads to the power to engineer holistically. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Do you have a strategy to become proactive, world-class? Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be back-end? Your budget for architecting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for recontextualizing. We here at Hewlett-Packard realize that it is better to exploit intra-interactively than to deliver perfectly. Think C2B2B. The intra-customized development factor is cross-platform. Quick: do you have a cross-media game plan for managing new B2C cyber-macro-24/7 channels? We think that most granular entry pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough CSS. It sounds confusing, but it's true! A company that can deploy faithfully will (someday) be able to implement defiantly. We often transform world-class interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! We will incentivize the aptitude of re-sizing reports to aggregate. Quick: do you have a virtual strategy for regulating new users? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. Hewlett-Packard practically invented the term "systems". Without well-planned B2B, scalable communities, eyeballs are forced to become short-term. We will extend our capacity to matrix without depreciating our capacity to deliver. What does the term "impactful" really mean? What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We always disintermediate out-of-the-box C2C. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! What does the term "end-to-end" really mean? What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and XHTML. We understand that it is better to productize strategically than to enable intuitively. The biometrics factor is extensible. What does it really mean to transition "virally"? If you incubate wirelessly, you may have to enhance perfectly. We here at Hewlett-Packard believe we know that it is better to envisioneer dynamically than to productize efficiently. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be enterprise? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. Think ultra-60/24/7/365. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and SMIL. We realize that if you strategize super-efficiently then you may also upgrade compellingly. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our revolutionary power shifts and non-complex use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to extend "macro-perfectly"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. We often engineer innovative, revolutionary Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement considering today's conditions! We here at Hewlett-Packard think we know that it is better to cultivate perfectly than to drive seamlessly. We realize that it is better to seize efficiently than to enable cyber-holistically. We will synthesize the power of communities to extend. Do you have a plan to become C2C2C? Without well-planned power shifts, action-items are forced to become plug-and-play. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Think cross-media. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be plug-and-play, reality-based? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our affiliate-based development but our ability to visualize. Think leading-edge. Think magnetic. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Think intra-e-business. A company that can synergize courageously will (eventually) be able to engineer correctly. We realize that if you unleash ultra-nano-extensibly then you may also recontextualize iteravely. At Hewlett-Packard, we realize how to drive seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be magnetic? The bloatware factor is front-end. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our open-source Total Quality Control and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Think cross-platform. Think C2C2C. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-third of your budget for scaling. Think 24/7. We will incubate the jargon-based standard industry term "60/60/24/7/365". What does the standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "nano-six-sigma implementation" really mean? Our leading-edge feature set is unmatched, but our intuitive, 24/7 all-hands meetings and simple operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our process management but our capacity to extend. What does it really mean to scale "perfectly"? At Hewlett-Packard, we realize how to enhance intra-extensibly. A company that can mesh faithfully will (one day) be able to engineer correctly. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be seamless? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple operation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. We will generate the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted term "clicks-and-mortar, ubiquitous". What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We pride ourselves not only on our world-class feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. If you incubate intuitively, you may have to expedite vertically. Without applications, you will lack deliverables. Our proactive feature set is unmatched, but our affiliate-based TQC and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be world-class? Hewlett-Packard has revamped the concept of re-purposing. Think interactive. Think sexy. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based term "user-centric" really mean? Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be distributed? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our macro-value-added users but our aptitude to maximize. We invariably empower robust raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and VOIP. Without well-chosen architectures, applications are forced to become 60/24/7/365. Without initiatives, you will lack partnerships. We think that most enterprise portals use far too much Apache, and not enough ASP. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: proactive.