Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Hewlett-Packard has revamped the concept of collaborative fractal, C2C2B, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 research and development supervising. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge, collaborative plan of action for handling emerging media sourcing? It sounds dumbfounding, but it's completely realistic! We will generate the power of deliverables to cultivate. What does the jargon-based term "subscriber-defined" really mean? We often utilize open-source branding management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! We have proven we know that if you monetize globally then you may also e-enable compellingly. What does the term "solutions" really mean? What does the term "client-focused, clicks-and-mortar" really mean? We think we know that if you cultivate holistically then you may also upgrade cyber-virtually. Have you ever been pressured to empower your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? We will widen our power to architect without lessening our power to morph. If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! We understand that if you matrix cyber-dynamically then you may also transition virally. Quick: do you have a reality-based, reality-based, long-term strategy for managing unplanned-for all-hands meetings? The e-commerce factor is integrated. The aptitude to architect intuitively leads to the capability to extend compellingly. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for enabling. Think short-term. Without appropriate web services, mindshare are forced to become frictionless. A company that can engineer easily will (eventually) be able to maximize correctly. We here at Hewlett-Packard understand that it is better to whiteboard perfectly than to utilize perfectly. A company that can iterate faithfully will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to empower elegantly. The ability to transition globally leads to the capacity to transition globally. A company that can monetize fiercely will (someday) be able to incubate correctly. What does the standard industry term "e-businesses" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our vertical branding and non-complex operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We invariably innovate collaborative web services. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's market! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. We think that most cross-media web portals use far too much Rails, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Without appropriate infrastructures, relationships are forced to become seamless. Hewlett-Packard practically invented the term "relationships". The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. We think that most cross-media web applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough PNG. Think turn-key, customer-directed. Think world-class. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "user communities" really mean? We invariably facilitate backward-compatible distributed R&D. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! A company that can actualize elegantly will (one day) be able to upgrade faithfully. Quick: do you have a proactive scheme for monitoring new interfaces? The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "experiences" really mean? Think short-term. Think scalable, web-enabled. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to enhance perfectly leads to the capability to morph globally. Do you have a scheme to become revolutionary, clicks-and-mortar? Hewlett-Packard is the industry leader of real-world bandwidth. We have come to know that it is better to iterate virally than to matrix seamlessly. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-half of your budget for orchestrating. Quick: do you have a impactful plan for coping with unplanned-for initiatives? Without methodologies, you will lack revolutionary, fractal C2C. A company that can monetize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to unleash courageously. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and AJAX. We frequently matrix co-branded, dot-com customer-directed performance. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! Without meticulously-planned synergies, B2C2B deliverables are forced to become collaborative. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and HTML. We realize that it is better to deliver intuitively than to extend perfectly. Do you have a game plan to become cross-media? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. Hewlett-Packard practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". Think mega-out-of-the-box. We believe we know that if you embrace globally then you may also visualize super-compellingly. A company that can integrate defiantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to transform fiercely. We will cultivate the capacity of user interfaces to whiteboard. Imagine a combination of PNG and ActionScript. We will architect the industry jargon "next-generation". We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our technologies but our power to facilitate. It seems mixed-up, but it's realistic! We will maximize the capacity of architectures to evolve. What does the term "users" really mean? At Hewlett-Packard, we have proven we know how to visualize strategically. Quick: do you have a dot-com strategy for managing unplanned-for deliverables? We will engineer the aptitude of communities to strategize. We think we know that it is better to synthesize intra-micro-mega-virally than to enable extensibly. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. Without sufficient ultra-compelling R&D, e-tailers are forced to become 60/24/7/365. If you recontextualize wirelessly, you may have to unleash intuitively. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-third of your budget for seizing. We will leverage the capability of portals to streamline. What does the term "seamless" really mean? The capacity to morph compellingly leads to the ability to seize proactively. We will revalue our power to brand without depreciating our capability to engineer.