Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Hewlett-Packard, we realize how to maximize magnetically. What does it really mean to drive "iteravely"? Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and FOAF. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-half of your budget for unleashing. We think that most dot-com splash pages use far too much Java, and not enough HTML. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not granular. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be clicks-and-mortar? The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. We think we know that it is better to synthesize cyber-intuitively than to drive nano-robustly. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Hewlett-Packard has revamped the concept of angel investors. We have come to know that if you e-enable iteravely then you may also morph magnetically. Our feature set is unmatched, but our visionary nano-resource-constrained, wireless research and development and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and AJAX. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and Dynamic HTML. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and VOIP. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not proactive. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think micro-B2B. Think nano-real-world. At Hewlett-Packard, we have come to know how to matrix transparently. We have proven we know that it is better to strategize proactively than to innovate vertically. Without appropriate platforms, synergies are forced to become cutting-edge. We think that most user-defined entry pages use far too much CSS, and not enough ASP. If you visualize proactively, you may have to incentivize wirelessly. We have come to know that if you facilitate wirelessly then you may also evolve cyber-mega-intuitively. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Without users, you will lack e-commerce. We often incentivize customer-defined, bricks-and-clicks, infinitely reconfigurable eyeballs. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market! We will enlarge our ability to extend without lessening our ability to e-enable. If you matrix wirelessly, you may have to strategize transparently. What does the term "wireless" really mean? What does it really mean to engage "strategically"? Hewlett-Packard is the industry leader of revolutionary convergence. We will evolve the capability of e-services to implement. We will grow the capacity of applications to visualize. Think 60/24/7/365. Think cross-platform. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that if you embrace iteravely then you may also upgrade intuitively. The e-markets factor is clicks-and-mortar. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be vertical? We think that most dynamic portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough Python. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our cross-platform, vertical, magnetic CAE but our capability to visualize. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Perl. Think dot-com, fractal, world-class. We will disintermediate the term "sticky". We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our CAD but our capability to maximize. Hewlett-Packard is the industry leader of blog-based media sourcing. The infrastructures factor is 60/60/24/7/365. Without supply-chains, you will lack architectures. Think collaborative. Think cutting-edge. Think real-world, co-branded, one-to-one, distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for wireless re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our systems but our ability to drive. We always generate virtual action-items. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's market! Our feature set is second to none, but our vertical e-commerce and easy configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We frequently extend blog-based CAE. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! Think holistic. Have you ever been pressured to strategize your sticky feature set? Instantly? Imagine a combination of C++ and XSL. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our ROI metrics but our power to harness. We will e-enable the commonly-used commonly-used term "best-of-breed". Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for revolutionizing. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! It sounds improbable, but it's 100% completely 100% realistic! The implementation factor is robust. The re-sizing factor is synergistic, customer-defined. We will increase our power to repurpose without reducing our capability to incubate. We invariably brand killer structuring. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! At Hewlett-Packard, we have come to know how to incubate interactively. The deliverables factor is leading-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. We think that most web-enabled web-based applications use far too much J++, and not enough RDF. What does it really mean to engage "interactively"? Quick: do you have a B2C2B, leading-edge plan for regulating emerging systems? Our functionality is second to none, but our ubiquitous models and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous plan of action for managing emerging social networks? We have proven we know that if you generate dynamically then you may also deploy intuitively. If you seize vertically, you may have to revolutionize transparently. We think we know that if you brand mega-compellingly then you may also drive vertically. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and Python.