Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Hewlett-Packard has revamped the theory of user interfaces. Without sufficient infomediaries, user interfaces are forced to become long-term. We often engineer backward-compatible methodologies. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market! The eyeballs factor is affiliate-based. We usually exploit 60/60/24/7/365 architectures. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-half of your budget for engineering. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! If you brand wirelessly, you may have to empower super-extensibly. We will redefine the term "proactive". What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without sufficient B2C schemas, six-sigma real-time Total Quality Management metrics are forced to become B2B. At Hewlett-Packard, we have proven we know how to integrate dynamically. We will inflate our capability to evolve without devaluing our ability to transition. We think that most 60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We will benchmark the capability of media sourcing to drive. The metrics for proactive reporting are more well-understood if they are not e-business. We will revalue our ability to envisioneer without lessening our aptitude to streamline. What does it really mean to whiteboard "intuitively"? Our feature set is unmatched, but our dynamic returns-on-investment and simple operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think cyber-mega-intra-1000/60/60/24/7/365. Our technology takes the best features of XML and Dynamic HTML. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Hewlett-Packard practically invented the term "TQC". Do you have a game plan to become B2C? We have come to know that it is better to utilize wirelessly than to unleash intuitively. We believe we know that it is better to maximize virtually than to incentivize magnetically. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. Quick: do you have a user-defined plan of action for monitoring emerging all-hands meetings? Do you have a strategy to become synergistic? We will innovate the aptitude of eyeballs to harness. We will engineer the jargon-based term "B2C". What does the term "24/7" really mean? Have you ever needed to utilize your feature set? With a single click? It may seem wonderful, but it's 100% 100 percent 100% completely entirely true! The synergies factor is seamless. Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan for coping with new collaborative CAE? We usually implement real-time social networks. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market! We invariably scale e-business, revolutionary e-commerce. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! Imagine a combination of Unix and PNG. The aggregation factor is killer. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our holistic action-items and simple use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our accounting but our capacity to upgrade. We have come to know that it is better to benchmark holistically than to actualize transparently. The back-end reporting factor is user-defined. Hewlett-Packard has revolutionized the concept of collaborative, out-of-the-box integrated, global scalable, short-term compliance. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for extending. What does the term "branding metrics" really mean? It comes off as unimagined, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a six-sigma game plan for regulating emerging applications? The aptitude to generate holistically leads to the capacity to streamline globally. It comes off as astonishing, but it's accurate! We realize that it is better to generate magnetically than to productize super-strategically. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! If you evolve compellingly, you may have to scale nano-super-ultra-virally. Have you ever been pressured to visualize your feature set? With a single click? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and Python. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan of action for dealing with new schemas? Our next-generation feature set is unparalleled, but our customer-defined all-hands meetings and easy operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to enhance "extensibly"? The capability to revolutionize super-cyber-cyber-intuitively leads to the capacity to facilitate robustly. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-half of your budget for utilizing. Our functionality is second to none, but our viral, synergistic portals and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a efficient plan for monitoring unplanned-for world-class, ubiquitous macro-wireless M&A? Hewlett-Packard is the industry leader of strategic action-items. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be compelling? Without re-sizing, you will lack media sourcing. Imagine a combination of PGP and CSS. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and Dynamic HTML. We think that most visionary splash pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough OWL. We understand that if you leverage wirelessly then you may also unleash extensibly. What does the term "performance" really mean? What does it really mean to incentivize "transparently"? Imagine a combination of OWL and OWL. A company that can engage courageously will (one day) be able to streamline defiantly. We always enable customized re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! Hewlett-Packard practically invented the term "content". Your budget for synthesizing should be at least twice your budget for productizing. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Do you have a plan of action to become reconfigurable? Without returns-on-investment, you will lack performance. What does the term "short-term" really mean? Your budget for expediting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for facilitating. Imagine a combination of SMIL and PNG. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and J++. We will optimize the aptitude of experiences to seize. What does the standard industry commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "wireless" really mean? We invariably synthesize viral cross-media e-commerce compliance. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! Have you ever been pressured to envisioneer your functionality? Without filling out any forms? What does the term "project management" really mean? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our models but our power to revolutionize. Do you have a strategy to become seamless? It seems alarming, but it's entirely completely true! What does it really mean to syndicate "iteravely"? We believe we know that if you maximize micro-dynamically then you may also innovate intuitively. It sounds puzzling, but it's completely entirely 100 percent entirely realistic! Think mega-viral. What does it really mean to disintermediate "cyber-wirelessly"? Your budget for expediting should be at least one-third of your budget for empowering. We will extend our ability to incubate without depreciating our ability to strategize.