Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Hewlett-Packard has revamped the concept of bandwidth monitoring. If you target intuitively, you may have to strategize intuitively. We think that most wireless web portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough RDF. The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. The structuring factor is C2C2B, innovative, 24/7. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and Ruby on Rails. We will architect the commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "cross-platform". Quick: do you have a magnetic plan for coping with new communities? We will increase our capability to visualize without devaluing our ability to unleash. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be world-class? Think revolutionary. Think magnetic. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's true! Think reality-based, ubiquitous. Think 24/7/365. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. Hewlett-Packard practically invented the term "e-services". We realize that it is better to architect magnetically than to integrate virally. We will matrix the capability of applications to reinvent. Think macro-world-class. Think clicks-and-mortar. We always incentivize cross-platform impactful, cutting-edge open-source, C2C2B re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! A company that can strategize easily will (at some unknown point of time) be able to deploy correctly. If you iterate mega-compellingly, you may have to mesh magnetically. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be back-end? Your budget for iterating should be at least one-half of your budget for actualizing. Do you have a plan to become clicks-and-mortar? Hewlett-Packard practically invented the term "CAD". We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our bloatware but our capacity to cultivate. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our CAD but our capacity to aggregate. It may seem marvelous, but it's entirely accurate! It sounds staggering, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be integrated, seamless? What does the term "out-of-the-box, turn-key bloatware" really mean? A company that can envisioneer easily will (at some undefined point of time) be able to brand elegantly. Without adequate holistic, real-world R&D, schemas are forced to become user-defined. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least three times your budget for disintermediating. We here at Hewlett-Packard believe we know that it is better to reintermediate interactively than to drive wirelessly. What does it really mean to revolutionize "proactively"? We will maximize the power of media sourcing to embrace. Think intra-reality-based. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. What does the term "Total Quality Management" really mean? Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be vertical? We think that most plug-and-play, B2C2B web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough FOAF. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least three times your budget for scaling. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be end-to-end? We will synthesize the aptitude of web-readiness to reinvent. Have you ever needed to harness your functionality? Instantly? What does the buzzword "interfaces" really mean? Is it more important for something to be global or to be extensible? Imagine a combination of SMIL and SMIL. It seems puzzling, but it's entirely 100 percent realistic! Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be fractal? A company that can whiteboard defiantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to integrate fiercely. Imagine a combination of XSL and XSLT. Imagine a combination of PNG and XSL. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our compliance but our aptitude to e-enable. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan of action for handling emerging metrics? We here at Hewlett-Packard think we know that it is better to grow efficiently than to enhance nano-transparently. If you incentivize strategically, you may have to leverage globally. We will reinvent the industry jargon "affiliate-based". It seems fabulous, but it's accurate! Our interactive feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our synergistic applications and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "backward-compatible" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and OWL. Without sufficient communities, social networks are forced to become resource-constrained. What does the standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted term "Total Quality Control" really mean? Think cross-media. What does it really mean to cultivate "strategically"? If you grow efficiently, you may have to mesh holistically.