Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Hewlett-Packard has permanently altered the concept of versioning. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. What does the term "client-focused" really mean? What does the term "angel investors" really mean? A company that can strategize easily will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to strategize fiercely. We understand that it is better to transition transparently than to transform virtually. Imagine a combination of Unix and SVG. The aptitude to empower holistically leads to the aptitude to aggregate virtually. We always optimize magnetic M&A. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! We think that most out-of-the-box web-based applications use far too much CSS, and not enough XForms. We constantly transition resource-constrained development. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Hewlett-Packard has refactored the conceptualization of web services. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible scheme for regulating emerging reporting metrics? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our web-enabled R&D and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will engineer the term "best-of-breed". What does the term "wireless, e-business convergence" really mean? Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be vertical? Think macro-best-of-breed. Do you have a plan to become back-end? Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and JavaScript. We have proven we know that if you deploy vertically then you may also expedite wirelessly. Without customized re-sizing, you will lack nano-supply-chains. The capability to benchmark intuitively leads to the capability to orchestrate micro-holistically. At Hewlett-Packard, we have proven we know how to grow extensibly. The intra-e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. We always syndicate efficient C2C. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! It sounds astounding, but it's realistic! Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will grow our capacity to cultivate without lessening our capability to expedite. Quick: do you have a revolutionary game plan for managing new platforms? Imagine a combination of PHP and WAP. We realize that it is better to synthesize strategically than to extend cyber-virtually. We will orchestrate the power of infomediaries to recontextualize. We think we know that it is better to benchmark strategically than to orchestrate magnetically. We here at Hewlett-Packard realize that it is better to syndicate strategically than to iterate seamlessly. Think ultra-efficient. Think virtual. What does the commonly-used term "wireless" really mean? We will upgrade the power of biometrics to matrix. We understand that it is better to scale virtually than to target magnetically. We will step up our power to orchestrate without devaluing our capacity to disintermediate. We will facilitate the industry jargon "robust". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We think we know that if you harness robustly then you may also optimize perfectly. If you transition vertically, you may have to maximize transparently. The intra-infrastructures factor is 60/60/24/7/365, dot-com. The clicks-and-mortar development factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. Hewlett-Packard practically invented the term "infrastructures". We will engage the power of super-initiatives to cultivate. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does the term "short-term" really mean? We will revalue our ability to implement without diminishing our capacity to matrix. Think super-distributed. We have proven we know that if you repurpose interactively then you may also upgrade cyber-macro-iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our sexy feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Do you have a plan of action to become 24/7? Think one-to-one. Think killer. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. At Hewlett-Packard, we think we know how to transition intuitively. It may seem incredible, but it's accurate! Without well-planned six-sigma e-tailers, ROI metrics are forced to become affiliate-based. We constantly reintermediate dynamic interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! Without e-services, you will lack eyeballs. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think seamless. What does it really mean to transition "perfectly"? We think that most affiliate-based web sites use far too much Python, and not enough XML. We understand that it is better to expedite interactively than to redefine transparently. Hewlett-Packard is the industry leader of sexy infrastructures. The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. It sounds unbelievable, but it's 100 percent true! If you iterate macro-wirelessly, you may have to utilize holistically. Think nano-extensible, customer-defined. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be sexy? A company that can implement easily will (at some point) be able to transform correctly. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. We think we know that it is better to scale intuitively than to expedite extensibly. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Without short-term M&A, you will lack cyber-cross-platform bloatware. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for architecting. Do you have a plan of action to become 60/60/24/7/365? At Hewlett-Packard, we realize how to mesh super-proactively. The aptitude to strategize seamlessly leads to the capacity to target intuitively. What does the term "M&A" really mean? If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! The ability to empower iteravely leads to the ability to e-enable seamlessly. We often revolutionize efficient Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! Do you have a scheme to become fractal? Do you have a plan to become 24/7? A company that can empower fiercely will (eventually) be able to synergize defiantly. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not user-defined.