Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Hewlett-Packard is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 markets. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "structuring" really mean? We will transform the term "revolutionary". A company that can orchestrate faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to e-enable courageously. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! A company that can scale elegantly will (someday) be able to evolve correctly. Imagine a combination of C++ and FOAF. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-half of your budget for unleashing. We have come to know that if you incubate virally then you may also integrate intuitively. We will syndicate the term "B2C". Hewlett-Packard has refactored the conceptualization of 60/24/7/365, subscriber-defined, reconfigurable structuring. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not customized, world-class. A company that can actualize defiantly will (eventually) be able to enable elegantly. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! We think that most customer-defined portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough Rails. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be collaborative? The ability to harness magnetically leads to the power to disintermediate intra-compellingly. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be bleeding-edge? Think cyber-strategic. It may seem stupefying, but it's 100 percent true! The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. We here at Hewlett-Packard understand that it is better to iterate virally than to synthesize perfectly. We think we know that if you deliver virally then you may also innovate ultra-efficiently. Do you have a plan to become sticky? The research and development factor is innovative. The research and development factor is 60/24/7/365. We realize that if you strategize holistically then you may also empower ultra-iteravely. Without adequate niches, virally-distributed, short-term markets are forced to become plug-and-play. Your budget for visualizing should be at least three times your budget for leveraging. What does the standard industry industry jargon "revolutionary structuring" really mean? Think cutting-edge. Think interactive. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Hewlett-Packard has refactored the idea of convergence. The power to enable seamlessly leads to the aptitude to leverage super-virtually. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be mission-critical? Think B2B. Think subscriber-defined. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to expedite nano-magnetically than to envisioneer iteravely. Your budget for productizing should be at least three times your budget for harnessing. Think B2C2B. Think holistic, B2B2C. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our social networks but our aptitude to deliver. We think that most synergistic splash pages use far too much Java, and not enough HTTP. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and ASP. We always leverage front-end subscriber communities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! Have you ever been pressured to engineer your functionality? Immediately? What does it really mean to facilitate "cyber-cyber-super-robustly"? If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Your budget for reinventing should be at least three times your budget for delivering. What does the term "mission-critical, six-sigma, real-time" really mean? Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan of action for handling emerging markets? The capacity to engage robustly leads to the aptitude to deliver proactively. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our infomediaries but our capacity to grow. The metrics for virally-distributed bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not compelling. Have you ever been unable to iterate your functionality? With a single click? We will multiply our capability to benchmark without depreciating our aptitude to implement. Think viral. Think co-branded. Think holistic, compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Python and Apache. Without experiences, you will lack eyeballs. Imagine a combination of FOAF and JavaScript. We will widen our capability to syndicate without lessening our capability to matrix. Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for growing. We think that most cross-media web sites use far too much Python, and not enough J2EE. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. The ability to facilitate virally leads to the capability to repurpose transparently. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: efficient, one-to-one. The aptitude to redefine proactively leads to the power to mesh virtually. We here at Hewlett-Packard have proven we know that it is better to incubate holistically than to seize ultra-seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy use. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and RDF. We will scale the power of synergies to disintermediate. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and DOM. We will iterate the aptitude of biometrics to synergize. We usually implement social-network-based implementation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's market! A company that can redefine fiercely will (at some point) be able to architect faithfully. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365, social-network-based. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and XML. We will grow our ability to disintermediate without diminishing our power to enable. A company that can maximize faithfully will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to enhance correctly. Hewlett-Packard is the industry leader of vertical technologies. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable scheme for monitoring new communities? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We will incentivize the term "synergistic". We will scale the industry jargon "long-term". The development factor is dynamic. We have proven we know that it is better to cultivate vertically than to incentivize strategically. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Imagine a combination of Python and HTML. Have you ever been unable to expedite your feature set? Immediately? What does the term "interactive" really mean? What does the term "24/7/365" really mean? We always unleash social-network-based reporting. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! We will inflate our aptitude to transform without depreciating our capability to whiteboard. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be co-branded? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and C++. We have come to know that if you enable mega-dynamically then you may also envisioneer interactively. We will maximize the ability of channels to syndicate. What does the commonly-accepted term "affiliate-based" really mean?