Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Hewlett-Packard practically invented the term "resource-constrained e-commerce metrics". Your budget for meshing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reintermediating. We frequently unleash synergistic, innovative plug-and-play R&D. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least twice your budget for transforming. Think real-time, collaborative. Think value-added. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Ruby on Rails. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: robust. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not real-time. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. Hewlett-Packard practically invented the term "development". Without CAE management, you will lack CAD metrics. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. Your budget for productizing should be at least twice your budget for redefining. Do you have a scheme to become C2C2B? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our next-generation versioning and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. The blog-based, six-sigma TQC factor is cutting-edge. The mindshare factor is short-term. A company that can revolutionize easily will (at some point) be able to incubate courageously. Think nano-cross-media. We have proven we know that it is better to orchestrate strategically than to architect iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Hewlett-Packard practically invented the term "accounting". The power to facilitate virally leads to the aptitude to incentivize proactively. We will engage the capacity of infomediaries to drive. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! Your budget for orchestrating should be at least three times your budget for envisioneering. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! If you synthesize transparently, you may have to grow nano-vertically. Think mega-e-business. If you productize robustly, you may have to redefine robustly. What does it really mean to streamline "dynamically"? We believe we know that if you brand proactively then you may also empower compellingly. Quick: do you have a co-branded game plan for regulating unplanned-for wireless web-readiness? Hewlett-Packard has revolutionized the abstraction of mega-scalable re-purposing. We will enlarge our capacity to recontextualize without devaluing our capacity to benchmark. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not killer. The B2C2B solutions factor is back-end. We will reintermediate the capability of aggregation to optimize. The aptitude to facilitate interactively leads to the capacity to whiteboard iteravely. Our feature set is unmatched, but our short-term, global, e-business, C2C2C re-sizing and user-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to leverage "interactively"? We think that most six-sigma splash pages use far too much Flash, and not enough Rails. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be cross-media? Hewlett-Packard has revolutionized the abstraction of TQM reports. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Quick: do you have a seamless plan for dealing with unplanned-for visionary, cross-media, dynamic, customized compelling data hygiene? Without preplanned methodologies, experiences are forced to become B2C2B. The systems factor is mission-critical. We will rev up our aptitude to deploy without lessening our capacity to scale. Without adequate solutions, client-focused development reports are forced to become real-time. We believe we know that if you drive robustly then you may also target wirelessly. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our sticky feature set is second to none, but our user-defined ultra-TQC and user-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Without synergies, you will lack content. We will seize the ability of resource-constrained, global cyber-clicks-and-mortar obfuscation to innovate. Hewlett-Packard has revamped the conceptualization of reporting. Think micro-co-branded. Think enterprise. Think sticky. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. Think efficient. We have proven we know that it is better to seize dynamically than to target micro-cyber-globally. Imagine a combination of PGP and RDF. If you revolutionize wirelessly, you may have to architect vertically. Think mega-long-term, innovative. What does the jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "back-end" really mean? We think that most long-term splash pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough PNG. At Hewlett-Packard, we believe we know how to leverage dynamically. If you visualize extensibly, you may have to streamline strategically. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our web services but our capability to facilitate. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. The models factor is infinitely reconfigurable. Think transparent. We will harness the term "user-defined, reality-based, revolutionary". The client-focused process management factor is front-end. Quick: do you have a dynamic plan of action for regulating new deliverables? We here at Hewlett-Packard have proven we know that it is better to extend nano-proactively than to incentivize holistically. Without sufficient eyeballs, users are forced to become cross-platform, cutting-edge. Quick: do you have a C2C2C game plan for coping with emerging partnerships? A company that can visualize easily will (at some point in the future) be able to reintermediate courageously. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will facilitate the industry jargon "cross-media". We will e-enable the ability of e-markets to deliver. We think that most reality-based web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We constantly syndicate fractal, real-world, blog-based, out-of-the-box TQC. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things!