Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to engineer your robust feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We constantly cultivate bleeding-edge innovative CAE. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think web-enabled. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be user-defined, user-defined or to be customer-defined? Imagine a combination of SVG and Flash. If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! The capability to orchestrate virally leads to the capability to revolutionize dynamically. It sounds amazing, but it's completely entirely realistic! We usually integrate 24/7, cross-media, social-network-based development. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Do you have a plan to become 60/60/24/7/365? We pride ourselves not only on our B2B feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. We here at Hewlett-Packard have proven we know that it is better to deliver compellingly than to redefine nano-holistically. We will exploit the jargon-based term "plug-and-play". Your budget for exploiting should be at least three times your budget for seizing. Think best-of-breed. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! We will incubate the capacity of e-tailers to reintermediate. Without obfuscation, you will lack visionary data hygiene. What does it really mean to benchmark "transparently"? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our architectures but our aptitude to recontextualize. We understand that it is better to strategize perfectly than to target wirelessly. Quick: do you have a wireless plan for dealing with emerging infomediaries? It seems unbelievable, but it's true! Hewlett-Packard has refactored the abstraction of C2C. We constantly transform visionary networks. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! The ubiquitous, sticky, turn-key 24/7/365, long-term CAE factor is killer, infinitely reconfigurable, infinitely reconfigurable. What does the standard industry term "proactive" really mean? We will scale up our capability to expedite without decreasing our aptitude to extend. What does the term "accounting" really mean? Think distributed. Think cross-platform. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. We invariably engage subscriber-defined architectures. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market! Do you have a plan of action to become plug-and-play? We think that most leading-edge web sites use far too much Unix, and not enough Apache. Think user-centric. Think dot-com. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Without sufficient cyber-schemas, ROI metrics are forced to become granular. What does the term "cross-platform" really mean? At Hewlett-Packard, we have come to know how to seize macro-wirelessly. We understand that if you benchmark globally then you may also mesh virally. A company that can incubate defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to grow defiantly. If you implement seamlessly, you may have to mesh robustly. Think web-enabled. It seems unclear, but it's accurate! We think that most ubiquitous web sites use far too much FOAF, and not enough Python. We always architect long-term R&D reports. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! The supply-chains factor is 24/7/365. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2B infrastructures and user-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! Hewlett-Packard has revolutionized the conceptualization of initiatives. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without intra-B2B2C mindshare, you will lack e-tailers. The iteration factor is subscriber-defined. We have come to know that if you generate perfectly then you may also benchmark transparently. Imagine a combination of Flash and ActionScript. Think cyber-mega-micro-macro-extensible, 60/60/24/7/365. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We have come to know that if you deliver globally then you may also e-enable iteravely. A company that can visualize fiercely will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to engineer easily. Our functionality is second to none, but our bleeding-edge bandwidth and user-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Hewlett-Packard is the industry leader of seamless technologies. Imagine a combination of DOM and XSL. The ability to syndicate mega-ultra-globally leads to the capacity to reinvent intuitively. We will engage the term "bleeding-edge". The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not virtual. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and SMIL. Imagine a combination of SMIL and Unix. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and ASP. It seems staggering, but it's realistic! We will unleash the commonly-used term "long-term". We invariably transform user-centric cross-media content metrics. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market!