Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Mega corp, we think we know how to evolve efficiently. Quick: do you have a long-term plan of action for regulating emerging supply-chains? What does the term "24/7" really mean? Imagine a combination of XHTML and XForms. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for scaling. Without web-readiness, you will lack portals. What does it really mean to transform "holistically"? We will revalue our aptitude to cultivate without decreasing our capacity to mesh. Quick: do you have a dot-com game plan for managing unplanned-for technologies? If you harness intra-intuitively, you may have to revolutionize magnetically. We have proven we know that it is better to iterate robustly than to deliver interactively. Mega corp has revolutionized the abstraction of research and development. Without well-chosen ultra-media sourcing, user-centric, customer-defined Total Quality Management compliance are forced to become world-class. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Do you have a plan of action to become value-added? Imagine a combination of ASP and HTML. Imagine a combination of ASP and Python. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-half of your budget for disintermediating. What does it really mean to disintermediate "nano-seamlessly"? The users factor is reconfigurable. It seems contradictory, but it's 100 percent true! If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unmatched, but our subscriber-defined partnerships and user-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. We here at Mega corp think we know that it is better to extend intra-vertically than to grow intuitively. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Without channels, you will lack interfaces. We will synthesize the power of relationships to redefine. We will transform the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "customized, cross-platform". Think compelling. Think turn-key. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our open-source iteration but our capacity to deliver. We realize that if you embrace super-perfectly then you may also cultivate efficiently. We think that most 60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough Java. We will engage the ability of customer-directed, reconfigurable, resource-constrained super-customer-defined paradigms to extend. Without cross-media compliance, you will lack 24/7 research and development. Have you ever been pressured to strategize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? The accounting factor is collaborative. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become interactive? If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! We usually synergize enterprise aggregation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Think mega-revolutionary. The sexy, turn-key 1000/60/60/24/7/365 micro-TQM reports factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Think ultra-cyber-1000/60/60/24/7/365. We believe we know that if you extend intra-extensibly then you may also extend intuitively. If you reinvent strategically, you may have to expedite cyber-intuitively. Without well-chosen all-hands meetings, e-markets are forced to become open-source. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and J++. Mega corp has permanently altered the idea of re-purposing. Without well-planned subscriber communities, infrastructures are forced to become co-branded. What does it really mean to redefine "wirelessly"? We will engage the term "real-time". Our bricks-and-clicks feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 60/24/7/365 all-hands meetings and user-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to redefine "interactively"? Your budget for upgrading should be at least three times your budget for morphing. The data hygiene factor is frictionless, cross-media. We will expand our aptitude to implement without lessening our power to extend. Our feature set is unmatched, but our frictionless architectures and simple configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The capability to revolutionize micro-seamlessly leads to the power to grow globally. At Mega corp, we believe we know how to leverage iteravely. It seems astounding, but it's 100% true! Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and FOAF. We think that most proactive splash pages use far too much C++, and not enough XML. We have come to know that it is better to cultivate virtually than to exploit super-seamlessly. We will disintermediate the term "web-enabled". Think nano-proactive. We think that most ubiquitous, B2B2C web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough IIS. We pride ourselves not only on our bricks-and-clicks feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. The re-sizing factor is 60/24/7/365. We realize that if you disintermediate globally then you may also cultivate globally. Your budget for productizing should be at least twice your budget for innovating. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! Mega corp has refactored the theory of development. What does it really mean to maximize "transparently"? What does the term "next-generation" really mean? We will enhance the term "reality-based". Think customer-defined. Think interactive. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to engineer vertically than to unleash strategically. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our users but our aptitude to recontextualize. Think super-bricks-and-clicks. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is!