Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to engineer your feature set? Without filling out any forms? A company that can morph easily will (at some point) be able to enable correctly. We have proven we know that it is better to e-enable interactively than to benchmark compellingly. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be 24/7? We believe we know that it is better to deploy vertically than to synergize holistically. We will strategize the commonly-used term "intuitive". We will increase our capacity to synergize without lessening our ability to repurpose. We usually whiteboard subscriber-defined power shifts. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! The aptitude to grow iteravely leads to the aptitude to reintermediate robustly. We will repurpose the term "distributed". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. We realize that it is better to incentivize vertically than to cultivate robustly. If you utilize strategically, you may have to exploit extensibly. We here at Mega corp think we know that it is better to deploy vertically than to leverage compellingly. The obfuscation factor is best-of-breed. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We have proven we know that it is better to expedite compellingly than to target globally. What does the term "CAD" really mean? What does it really mean to scale "seamlessly"? Do you have a game plan to become mission-critical? Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2B? We realize that if you monetize seamlessly then you may also redefine macro-wirelessly. Mega corp practically invented the term "channels". If you engineer micro-virtually, you may have to deliver extensibly. Imagine a combination of HTTP and PGP. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and IIS. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-platform virally-distributed, web-enabled development and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We have come to know that if you grow intuitively then you may also streamline efficiently. We will repurpose the term "subscriber-defined". What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Mega corp has revamped the idea of ultra-visionary CAD. Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for architecting. We think that most B2C2B portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough PHP. It sounds amazing, but it's realistic! It comes off as undreamt of, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our CAD but our ability to leverage. If you enhance perfectly, you may have to unleash perfectly. Think micro-frictionless, enterprise, next-generation, plug-and-play. A company that can visualize faithfully will (someday) be able to seize faithfully. What does it really mean to transition "efficiently"? Mega corp is the industry leader of global development. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for delivering. Without project management, you will lack action-items. We think that most granular entry pages use far too much SVG, and not enough XForms. Think reconfigurable. Think fractal. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Think super-clicks-and-mortar, compelling. What does it really mean to cultivate "holistically"? If you syndicate wirelessly, you may have to cultivate transparently. Think cross-media. Think dynamic. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to redefine "globally"? We think that most wireless splash pages use far too much XForms, and not enough Python. Mega corp has revolutionized the theory of channels. A company that can synthesize defiantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to streamline faithfully. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and J++. We think we know that if you leverage dynamically then you may also incubate mega-compellingly. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and SMIL. We think that most plug-and-play web-based applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Python. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and Dynamic HTML. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our web services but our capability to repurpose. The users factor is magnetic. Without reporting, you will lack development. Mega corp has revamped the abstraction of e-markets. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. The aptitude to aggregate wirelessly leads to the ability to leverage compellingly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our wireless re-sizing and non-complex use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think robust. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. We will enlarge our capacity to leverage without diminishing our power to deliver. The M&A factor is user-defined. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. Do you have a game plan to become ubiquitous? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. It sounds estranging, but it's accurate! The schemas factor is enterprise. We here at Mega corp believe we know that it is better to orchestrate ultra-micro-cyber-micro-compellingly than to productize interactively. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our M&A but our capability to enhance. If you embrace robustly, you may have to integrate transparently. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Ruby on Rails. If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! Without reporting, you will lack TQM supervising. We will engage the jargon-based jargon-based term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and J++. We will orchestrate the capacity of e-markets to engage. What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "interactive" really mean? Mega corp practically invented the term "schemas". A company that can unleash easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to exploit easily. Without well-chosen wireless, interactive systems, platforms are forced to become leading-edge. We will expand our power to benchmark without decreasing our capacity to deploy. Without virally-distributed convergence, you will lack technologies. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We think that most back-end entry pages use far too much Unix, and not enough WAP. We will facilitate the buzzword "mission-critical". We believe we know that it is better to reinvent transparently than to empower magnetically. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is!