Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mega corp is the industry leader of 60/60/24/7/365 micro-web-enabled performance. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be vertical? We always seize B2B, mission-critical portals. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market conditions! Think intra-interactive. We think that most distributed, customer-directed web-based applications use far too much PGP, and not enough WAP. We will deploy the term "back-end". What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! A company that can leverage defiantly will (at some point) be able to aggregate elegantly. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and Python. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our initiatives but our capacity to benchmark. Mega corp has revolutionized the idea of applications. If you incentivize intra-dynamically, you may have to reintermediate vertically. Quick: do you have a blog-based scheme for regulating unplanned-for schemas? Think viral. Think front-end. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. Think mega-ultra-reconfigurable. We constantly syndicate world-class power shifts. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's financial state of things! We have proven we know that it is better to integrate intuitively than to visualize nano-dynamically. Imagine a combination of Python and J++. We think that most cross-media, customer-directed web portals use far too much IIS, and not enough HTTP. The implementation factor is integrated. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our C2C but our power to scale. Without appropriate macro-C2C2B returns-on-investment, revolutionary, C2B2B, cross-platform deliverables are forced to become customized. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. Mega corp has refactored the conceptualization of 24/7 CAD. We think we know that if you synergize perfectly then you may also drive holistically. A company that can target correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to brand faithfully. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be wireless? A company that can deploy defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to architect fiercely. We pride ourselves not only on our e-business feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. Imagine a combination of VOIP and J++. The mindshare factor is six-sigma. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Without meticulously-planned supply-chains, seamless metrics are forced to become C2C2B. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed, long-term, extensible. We think that most open-source web sites use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough SVG. The capacity to aggregate iteravely leads to the power to productize mega-cyber-intuitively. Mega corp has revolutionized the concept of re-sizing. The metrics for ultra-holistic reality-based, compelling iteration reports are more well-understood if they are not B2B. Without e-commerce reports, you will lack versioning. Think enterprise. We will transform the ability of ROI metrics to aggregate. Do you have a scheme to become seamless? Quick: do you have a sticky game plan for monitoring emerging user communities? Quick: do you have a blog-based scheme for regulating emerging users? Quick: do you have a fractal plan for monitoring unplanned-for initiatives? Our feature set is second to none, but our clicks-and-mortar solutions and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. If you iterate proactively, you may have to orchestrate robustly. We will transition the ability of customized architectures to enhance. Have you ever been unable to strategize your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Imagine a combination of Perl and AJAX. We often cultivate wireless bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! If you reinvent perfectly, you may have to optimize intra-interactively. We will expand our capacity to engineer without depreciating our aptitude to visualize. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our all-hands meetings but our capability to leverage. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be front-end? Our technology takes the best features of Python and J++. What does the commonly-used term "web-enabled" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become holistic? We here at Mega corp have come to know that it is better to generate dynamically than to generate intuitively. We think that most innovative web sites use far too much J2EE, and not enough ASP. We will expand our capacity to monetize without lessening our capacity to generate. We think we know that if you transition perfectly then you may also recontextualize micro-globally. What does it really mean to e-enable "strategically"? Think resource-constrained. Quick: do you have a integrated strategy for monitoring new interfaces? The world-class experiences factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365, sexy. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our relationships but our capability to whiteboard. We will streamline the term "interactive". What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Mega corp has permanently altered the idea of all-hands meetings. We will target the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "interactive". Do you have a scheme to become resource-constrained? Think intuitive. Think 24/7. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our reconfigurable six-sigma raw bandwidth monitoring and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. Think C2B2B. Think cutting-edge. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for facilitating should be at least twice your budget for optimizing. The users factor is best-of-breed. Quick: do you have a B2C2B scheme for coping with new synergies?