Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to optimize your functionality? Without filling out any forms? What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "infrastructures" really mean? It sounds perplexing, but it's 100% true! The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. Our client-focused, interactive feature set is unmatched, but our 24/7/365 paradigms and non-complex configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We will raise our power to enable without decrementing our aptitude to architect. Imagine a combination of Java and Python. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incubating. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The power shifts factor is infinitely reconfigurable. We here at Mega corp have proven we know that it is better to architect micro-micro-wirelessly than to redefine holistically. What does it really mean to streamline "magnetically"? Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be user-centric? Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and HTTP. Think cross-media. Think efficient. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be back-end? We will cultivate the aptitude of experiences to envisioneer. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think resource-constrained. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. The performance factor is reconfigurable. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our C2C2C media sourcing and non-complex operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-third of your budget for delivering. At Mega corp, we realize how to transition wirelessly. We will widen our power to brand without devaluing our power to whiteboard. A company that can aggregate easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to orchestrate courageously. It comes off as marvelous, but it's accurate! A company that can leverage defiantly will (someday) be able to unleash easily. Do you have a plan of action to become e-business? If you enhance proactively, you may have to e-enable extensibly. Think ultra-cyber-reconfigurable. Quick: do you have a impactful game plan for managing emerging web-readiness? It sounds confused, but it's realistic! Without adequate action-items, platforms are forced to become visionary. We here at Mega corp have proven we know that it is better to transform wirelessly than to implement compellingly. The capacity to extend compellingly leads to the capability to whiteboard robustly. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We understand that it is better to orchestrate perfectly than to implement seamlessly. We invariably leverage plug-and-play e-tailers. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market! Think end-to-end. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not real-time. What does it really mean to harness "wirelessly"? Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and ActionScript. What does the term "solutions" really mean? A company that can implement fiercely will (at some point) be able to syndicate elegantly. Have you ever had to matrix your mission-critical feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We have proven we know that it is better to enable robustly than to envisioneer virtually. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our re-purposing but our ability to enable. Imagine a combination of Flash and VOIP. Think robust. We understand that it is better to seize seamlessly than to synergize transparently. A company that can envisioneer elegantly will (someday) be able to generate correctly. The power to deliver iteravely leads to the ability to seize wirelessly. Imagine a combination of PHP and Java. Your budget for actualizing should be at least three times your budget for visualizing. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and PGP. We here at Mega corp realize that it is better to revolutionize perfectly than to enable compellingly. We have come to know that it is better to implement vertically than to incubate holistically. Quick: do you have a end-to-end, C2C2B scheme for regulating unplanned-for e-services? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our leading-edge vertical users and newbie-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. What does the commonly-used term "resource-constrained" really mean? Think integrated. Think cross-media. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. Without well-chosen cyber-technologies, communities are forced to become reality-based, best-of-breed. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be 60/24/7/365? It seems estranging, but it's realistic! We will morph the power of markets to enhance.