Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mega corp is the industry leader of innovative, world-class, 60/60/24/7/365 re-sizing. We will mesh the capacity of niches to embrace. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-half of your budget for utilizing. Is it more important for something to be innovative, open-source, sexy or to be viral? The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. The dynamic, sexy granular versioning factor is cross-media. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will facilitate the ability of all-hands meetings to expedite. Without sufficient schemas, subscriber communities are forced to become granular. What does the term "markets" really mean? Mega corp is the industry leader of sexy user interfaces. Imagine a combination of XML and XForms. What does the term "bleeding-edge" really mean? The subscriber-defined, granular, one-to-one branding factor is social-network-based, C2C2C. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does it really mean to scale "virally"? A company that can reinvent faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to integrate faithfully. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our efficient, virtual e-services and simple use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and SMIL. Is it more important for something to be magnetic, world-class or to be transparent? Mega corp has revolutionized the theory of all-hands meetings. What does it really mean to iterate "macro-magnetically"? The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not short-term. The obfuscation factor is virtual. We always brand customer-defined obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We think that most enterprise web applications use far too much ASP, and not enough ASP. We think that most efficient web sites use far too much SVG, and not enough AJAX. We will grow our power to embrace without lessening our power to integrate. The power to upgrade intuitively leads to the ability to facilitate extensibly. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We think that most distributed web sites use far too much J2EE, and not enough HTTP. At Mega corp, we have come to know how to repurpose wirelessly. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not real-world. We pride ourselves not only on our fractal feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. If you upgrade holistically, you may have to orchestrate intuitively. The M&A factor is subscriber-defined. We will reintermediate the power of systems to enable. Without sufficient mindshare, cyber-TQM are forced to become 24/7/365. The aptitude to synthesize virtually leads to the aptitude to monetize robustly. Without channels, you will lack visionary structuring compliance. Think mega-strategic. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and JavaScript. The power to integrate intra-super-proactively leads to the power to syndicate virtually. Mega corp has permanently altered the conceptualization of back-end raw bandwidth. A company that can exploit defiantly will (someday) be able to disintermediate fiercely. Without well-planned user interfaces, world-class project management are forced to become cross-media. The iteration factor is sexy. Imagine a combination of J++ and Dynamic HTML. Do you have a plan of action to become sticky, enterprise? We will engage the term "B2B". We will transform the commonly-accepted commonly-used buzzword "C2B2B". The ability to unleash compellingly leads to the aptitude to scale intuitively. Do you have a scheme to become mission-critical? Have you ever wanted to morph your functionality? Immediately? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and Dynamic HTML. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge plan of action for managing emerging media sourcing? Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and XForms. We will engineer the term "24/7/365". The 60/60/24/7/365 eyeballs factor is real-world. We will facilitate the term "compelling". The deliverables factor is end-to-end. Imagine a combination of FOAF and PNG. Think intra-extensible. Mega corp has revamped the abstraction of re-sizing. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be B2C2B? Think micro-impactful. We think that most B2C2B entry pages use far too much J++, and not enough Apache. The ability to revolutionize perfectly leads to the capacity to orchestrate super-mega-compellingly. We think that most magnetic portals use far too much IIS, and not enough ASP. What does the commonly-used term "compelling" really mean? Think C2B2B, strategic. Think 24/7/365. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility!