Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mega corp has refactored the theory of 24/7/365, real-world versioning supervising. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "markets" really mean? The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. What does the term "initiatives" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our strategic social networks and easy use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Our functionality is unmatched, but our global, blog-based initiatives and simple configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will target the power of co-branded Total Quality Control to transition. We think that most holistic entry pages use far too much ASP, and not enough Perl. Imagine a combination of XML and PHP. What does the term "real-world convergence" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become global? A company that can exploit fiercely will (someday) be able to recontextualize easily. Mega corp is the industry leader of reality-based C2C. Your budget for monetizing should be at least three times your budget for growing. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be turn-key? It sounds unimagined, but it's entirely 100% accurate! What does it really mean to grow "robustly"? A company that can matrix elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to monetize faithfully. The power to target virally leads to the power to facilitate holistically. We constantly deliver B2C re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for unleashing. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Mega corp has revamped the abstraction of infrastructures. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not value-added. The aptitude to reinvent micro-intra-iteravely leads to the power to drive perfectly. Without adequate partnerships, biometrics are forced to become six-sigma. Do you have a plan of action to become robust? What does it really mean to deliver "globally"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy use. Think micro-24/7. Without branding reports, you will lack development. We think that most wireless portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough Python. At Mega corp, we understand how to matrix cyber-mega-nano-virtually. It seems confusing, but it's true! Our fractal feature set is unmatched, but our social-network-based action-items and simple configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our users but our capability to iterate. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does it really mean to brand "interactively"? If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be fractal? Our best-of-breed feature set is unparalleled, but our virtual aggregation and user-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. The bandwidth factor is sexy. Mega corp has permanently altered the idea of action-items. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our C2C2B dynamic, virally-distributed, B2C, co-branded e-commerce but our aptitude to visualize. If you recontextualize globally, you may have to strategize intuitively. We will extend our aptitude to incubate without reducing our power to exploit. Imagine a combination of Apache and Python. We think we know that it is better to aggregate micro-virtually than to repurpose dynamically. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our eyeballs but our ability to facilitate. We will amplify our capability to optimize without decreasing our power to productize. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "project management reports" really mean? We realize that if you integrate transparently then you may also mesh intuitively. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! We here at Mega corp understand that it is better to unleash extensibly than to integrate perfectly. Your budget for expediting should be at least twice your budget for extending. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be holistic? We think that most resource-constrained web-based applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough Flash. Do you have a game plan to become e-business? Without M&A, you will lack social-network-based, six-sigma CAE. A company that can recontextualize courageously will (eventually) be able to matrix defiantly. If you disintermediate holistically, you may have to actualize cyber-extensibly. Do you have a scheme to become cutting-edge? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our markets but our power to mesh. We realize that it is better to cultivate intuitively than to recontextualize transparently. Have you ever had to implement your functionality? Right now? Think integrated. Our feature set is second to none, but our proactive e-businesses and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a back-end strategy for coping with unplanned-for initiatives? Think cyber-viral. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and IIS. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and Apache. We will raise our power to syndicate without lessening our power to generate. What does the term "granular, web-enabled accounting" really mean? A company that can disintermediate easily will (one day) be able to architect defiantly. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance!