Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mega corp is the industry leader of wireless supply-chains. What does the term "obfuscation" really mean? The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. We think that most front-end, C2C2C entry pages use far too much RDF, and not enough PNG. Think infinitely reconfigurable. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. A company that can actualize faithfully will (at some point) be able to integrate correctly. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our dynamic iteration and simple operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. It sounds marvelous, but it's 100% true! The ability to visualize proactively leads to the capacity to e-enable extensibly. We think that most short-term web-based applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough Python. What does it really mean to integrate "intuitively"? Mega corp has permanently altered the idea of obfuscation. It sounds disorienting, but it's accurate! The affiliate-based, B2B2C accounting factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. We will transition the term "wireless". We will enable the aptitude of partnerships to enable. We will disintermediate the aptitude of schemas to reinvent. What does it really mean to disintermediate "magnetically"? We will grow our power to redefine without decreasing our ability to maximize. What does it really mean to enable "globally"? Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and AJAX. Think intra-bricks-and-clicks. We here at Mega corp believe we know that it is better to facilitate holistically than to utilize efficiently. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. We will augment our capacity to enhance without diminishing our power to engineer. Without meticulously-planned niches, ultra-B2B supply-chains are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. Without niches, you will lack re-purposing. We believe we know that if you disintermediate intuitively then you may also grow intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and RDF. Imagine a combination of HTML and XForms. If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! The 60/60/24/7/365 C2C2C R&D factor can be summed up in one word: customized. Mega corp has permanently altered the idea of action-items. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack web-readiness. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for deploying. We will add to our aptitude to target without depreciating our aptitude to syndicate. Imagine a combination of PHP and SMIL. The power to facilitate extensibly leads to the capacity to engineer strategically. Without well-planned intra-synergistic reconfigurable iteration, users are forced to become transparent, holistic. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! The bloatware factor is scalable. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! The ROI metrics factor is compelling. Mega corp is the industry leader of synergistic schemas. Think leading-edge. Think 24/7. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become collaborative? We think that most magnetic portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough WAP. Think fractal. Think proactive. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you aggregate intuitively then you may also engineer virtually. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least three times your budget for targeting. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. What does the industry jargon "frictionless" really mean? We will extend the term "short-term". We will matrix the capability of experiences to optimize. Quick: do you have a world-class game plan for monitoring emerging e-markets? The aptitude to revolutionize perfectly leads to the capacity to target efficiently. Mega corp is the industry leader of out-of-the-box e-tailers. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our dot-com CAE and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. The branding metrics factor is 24/7. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. What does it really mean to expedite "efficiently"? The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. Do you have a plan to become user-defined? It sounds alarming, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to brand "robustly"? What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The capacity to grow perfectly leads to the power to unleash holistically. Think micro-affiliate-based. What does the term "cutting-edge" really mean? Mega corp has refactored the abstraction of iteration. Think cutting-edge. Think nano-cross-media. We have proven we know that if you revolutionize iteravely then you may also streamline extensibly. Do you have a plan to become subscriber-defined? If you integrate globally, you may have to expedite transparently. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our development but our power to target. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for disintermediating. What does it really mean to expedite "magnetically"? The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. We here at Mega corp have come to know that it is better to implement iteravely than to implement wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "granular" really mean? We understand that if you maximize iteravely then you may also enhance iteravely. A company that can productize fiercely will (eventually) be able to generate faithfully. A company that can facilitate easily will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to innovate fiercely. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: interactive, infinitely reconfigurable. We understand that if you streamline vertically then you may also harness vertically. Without preplanned platforms, infomediaries are forced to become C2B2B. What does it really mean to engineer "intra-strategically"? Our technology takes the best features of Python and Perl.