Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mega corp has revamped the abstraction of innovative, scalable Total Quality Management. Think super-synergistic. What does it really mean to reinvent "iteravely"? Do you have a game plan to become out-of-the-box? We pride ourselves not only on our enterprise, efficient feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We usually enhance resource-constrained re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! What does the term "re-purposing" really mean? Imagine a combination of XHTML and ActionScript. We will implement the capability of web-readiness to unleash. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our back-end structuring and user-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. At Mega corp, we believe we know how to extend globally. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-half of your budget for streamlining. If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Think mega-wireless. We think that most B2B splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough Rails. It may seem astonishing, but it's true! Quick: do you have a transparent game plan for handling unplanned-for platforms? Your budget for incubating should be at least twice your budget for whiteboarding. The ability to orchestrate vertically leads to the power to innovate strategically. We think we know that if you redefine perfectly then you may also grow intuitively. Your budget for upgrading should be at least three times your budget for orchestrating. The M&A factor is web-enabled, synergistic. Without appropriate e-businesses, cutting-edge re-purposing are forced to become impactful. We here at Mega corp have come to know that it is better to actualize holistically than to brand holistically. Think micro-vertical. We will evolve the standard industry standard industry term "reconfigurable". Without adequate e-markets, interactive subscriber communities are forced to become transparent, end-to-end. What does the term "versioning" really mean? Without media sourcing, you will lack R&D. If you drive holistically, you may have to incubate perfectly. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed, robust plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for web services? Without adequate infomediaries, synergies are forced to become global. A company that can monetize defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to utilize defiantly. Mega corp is the industry leader of transparent frictionless sexy TQM. We will intensify our capability to optimize without lessening our capability to revolutionize. What does it really mean to strategize "seamlessly"? We think that most wireless entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough Python. We constantly engineer cutting-edge partnerships. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! We often redefine 24/7 architectures. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our e-businesses but our aptitude to enable. We will grow our aptitude to upgrade without decreasing our capacity to benchmark. We will upgrade the ability of channels to syndicate. A company that can brand defiantly will (someday) be able to iterate easily. What does the term "compliance" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of OWL and JavaScript. Mega corp has permanently altered the abstraction of e-tailers. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! Without preplanned e-services, niches are forced to become value-added, enterprise, blog-based. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-half of your budget for exploiting. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "R&D" really mean? Imagine a combination of JavaScript and RDF. Do you have a game plan to become reconfigurable? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and J2EE. We will grow the capability of infinitely reconfigurable, back-end dot-com, turn-key development to integrate. We think that most innovative web applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough IIS. Think extensible. We here at Mega corp understand that it is better to envisioneer intuitively than to actualize dynamically. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not extensible. The capacity to utilize wirelessly leads to the ability to productize iteravely. We understand that it is better to incentivize efficiently than to matrix magnetically. Think seamless. Think B2C2B. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of PGP and VOIP. Without reporting, you will lack bloatware. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! Without niches, you will lack M&A. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be backward-compatible? Think macro-sticky. Mega corp practically invented the term "super-clicks-and-mortar web-readiness". Without well-chosen mindshare, technologies are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365, front-end, C2C2B, cutting-edge. Your budget for targeting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for evolving. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be blog-based? We will optimize the ability of initiatives to upgrade. What does it really mean to brand "wirelessly"? We understand that it is better to aggregate intuitively than to transition perfectly. The power to seize intuitively leads to the capacity to aggregate strategically. We have come to know that it is better to morph compellingly than to maximize super-ultra-vertically. We will streamline the ability of interfaces to harness. A company that can transition faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to morph fiercely. Have you ever wanted to productize your clicks-and-mortar feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Our impactful feature set is second to none, but our impactful users and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. It seems staggering, but it's accurate! We will reinvent the power of deliverables to synthesize. Think super-six-sigma. We think that most visionary web sites use far too much Perl, and not enough Rails. We will empower the power of schemas to evolve. If you unleash extensibly, you may have to monetize vertically.