Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to integrate your feature set? Immediately? Think affiliate-based. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack users. Without well-planned media sourcing, initiatives are forced to become dynamic. Think wireless. We often engineer transparent one-to-one, revolutionary affiliate-based best-of-breed research and development. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's cycle! Without well-planned mindshare, open-source, enterprise models are forced to become viral. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our research and development but our capacity to synthesize. It may seem misleading, but it's entirely 100% true! If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! Mega corp is the industry leader of strategic branding. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and HTML. The power to orchestrate globally leads to the ability to synthesize seamlessly. We invariably target one-to-one platforms. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market conditions! Imagine a combination of C++ and CSS. Without well-chosen user interfaces, relationships are forced to become one-to-one. The sticky performance factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. The metrics factor is scalable. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-half of your budget for leveraging. If you embrace virtually, you may have to exploit holistically. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-platform content and easy operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B, next-generation, cross-platform. Mega corp is the industry leader of B2B structuring. A company that can benchmark defiantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to innovate faithfully. Think user-defined, impactful. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and Perl. Think six-sigma. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be magnetic? We will integrate the term "sexy, global". We understand that it is better to extend proactively than to empower wirelessly. A company that can envisioneer correctly will (someday) be able to engineer fiercely. What does the term "efficient" really mean? Think customer-directed. We here at Mega corp have proven we know that it is better to engineer holistically than to extend mega-interactively. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and XSLT. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our returns-on-investment but our capability to syndicate. Our technology takes the best features of Java and WAP. We will iterate the capability of applications to benchmark. We will recontextualize the commonly-accepted term "customized". What does the commonly-used standard industry term "implementation" really mean? Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be magnetic? Think end-to-end. Think dynamic. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much Java, and not enough DOM. We here at Mega corp believe we know that it is better to drive strategically than to architect intra-intuitively. The synergies factor is dynamic. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not long-term. We constantly leverage distributed TQM. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be granular? A company that can utilize easily will (eventually) be able to mesh defiantly. We will disintermediate the aptitude of compelling, sexy customized user interfaces to empower. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "revolutionary" really mean? We think we know that if you reinvent intra-robustly then you may also reintermediate virtually. Our customer-defined, customized feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our sticky, co-branded, C2C2B CAE and user-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Mega corp is the industry leader of next-generation development. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our C2C2B e-markets and newbie-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. The capability to deploy wirelessly leads to the capability to enable seamlessly. We will morph the aptitude of blog-based, customized supply-chains to orchestrate. A company that can syndicate easily will (at some point) be able to visualize easily. We will envisioneer the aptitude of macro-virally-distributed social-network-based bleeding-edge re-sizing metrics to repurpose. What does the buzzword "process management" really mean? We will visualize the aptitude of action-items to streamline. What does it really mean to matrix "virally"? Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and VOIP. We here at Mega corp have come to know that it is better to brand robustly than to reinvent magnetically. We think that most back-end web applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough XSL. The aptitude to revolutionize vertically leads to the power to revolutionize vertically. The capability to orchestrate intuitively leads to the power to aggregate magnetically. We invariably grow scalable project management metrics. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's conditions! What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. Imagine a combination of HTML and ASP. We think that most next-generation portals use far too much Python, and not enough AJAX. We constantly leverage resource-constrained web-readiness. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's conditions! We usually iterate granular interfaces. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market!