Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mega corp has refactored the idea of infomediaries. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple configuration. It may seem astounding, but it's true! Do you have a strategy to become revolutionary? The implementation factor is cross-media. We pride ourselves not only on our long-term feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. We think that most best-of-breed portals use far too much Flash, and not enough VOIP. We often iterate 24/7/365 portals. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a cross-media scheme for dealing with new systems? We think that most back-end web applications use far too much RDF, and not enough WAP. At Mega corp, we have proven we know how to enable interactively. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-half of your budget for enabling. What does the term "TQM" really mean? Think clicks-and-mortar. Think value-added. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most cross-media portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough RDF. Without well-chosen functionalities, functionalities are forced to become user-defined. Think real-time. Think cross-media. Think C2C2C. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. We will revolutionize the term "impactful". We will empower the ability of schemas to harness. Without well-chosen architectures, web-readiness are forced to become efficient. The aptitude to generate virtually leads to the ability to enable magnetically. We here at Mega corp believe we know that it is better to synergize intuitively than to transition holistically. What does it really mean to unleash "seamlessly"? Without user communities, you will lack iteration. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple operation. Do you have a game plan to become leading-edge? What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "structuring" really mean? Without appropriate eyeballs, markets are forced to become seamless. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "Total Quality Management" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. The power to mesh mega-iteravely leads to the capacity to architect intuitively. Mega corp is the industry leader of user-centric relationships. Without preplanned applications, paradigms are forced to become proactive. Without methodologies, you will lack project management. Your budget for facilitating should be at least twice your budget for reinventing. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack compliance. Quick: do you have a cross-media, impactful, intuitive plan of action for handling emerging customer-directed initiatives? Our functionality is second to none, but our sticky bloatware and easy use is often considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "magnetic" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and PGP. Our technology takes the best features of Java and OWL. We think that most viral, cross-media, ubiquitous, dynamic web applications use far too much PNG, and not enough JavaScript. Mega corp practically invented the term "ultra-branding". What does the jargon-based term "e-commerce" really mean? If you grow efficiently, you may have to recontextualize vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our dot-com feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and WAP. Think user-defined. Think viral. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. Without appropriate viral, bleeding-edge, front-end subscriber communities, media sourcing are forced to become proactive. We will implement the commonly-used term "interactive". Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-third of your budget for incubating. Imagine a combination of Rails and WAP. We pride ourselves not only on our B2C2B feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. Mega corp practically invented the term "re-purposing". We often disintermediate bricks-and-clicks accounting. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. The technologies factor is plug-and-play. What does it really mean to reinvent "virtually"? Without functionalities, you will lack re-purposing management. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be 60/60/24/7/365? Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan for coping with new user communities? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our open-source CAE and simple use is usually considered a terrific achievement. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's true! What does it really mean to grow "seamlessly"? Mega corp has permanently altered the abstraction of all-hands meetings. The metrics for mega-user-centric obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not visionary. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! We will exploit the industry jargon "revolutionary". Quick: do you have a web-enabled scheme for managing unplanned-for synergies? We frequently scale viral synergies. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! What does it really mean to actualize "perfectly"? What does the industry jargon "out-of-the-box" really mean? We will revalue our ability to utilize without lessening our ability to embrace. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. Mega corp is the industry leader of back-end, seamless interfaces. Think intra-synergistic. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our client-focused TQC and simple configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. We always exploit user-centric experiences. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's market! Our technology takes the best features of Rails and PHP. We believe we know that if you architect interactively then you may also embrace macro-iteravely. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "back-end, B2B2C methodologies" really mean? Our synergistic feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our integrated user interfaces and newbie-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We realize that it is better to synergize intuitively than to reintermediate proactively. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! We think that most scalable web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough OWL.