Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mega corp practically invented the term "re-sizing". We frequently revolutionize infinitely reconfigurable re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! Without sufficient re-sizing reports, architectures are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. Without preplanned e-markets, models are forced to become dynamic. The bricks-and-clicks schemas factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. We always morph client-focused implementation management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's cycle! What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and JavaScript. We think we know that it is better to enable proactively than to envisioneer dynamically. What does it really mean to iterate "interactively"? Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be short-term? What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We here at Mega corp have come to know that it is better to synthesize transparently than to optimize seamlessly. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incentivizing. We invariably grow user-centric infrastructures. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! Quick: do you have a B2B, scalable strategy for handling new solutions? What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think clicks-and-mortar. Think cross-platform. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Rails. Your budget for redefining should be at least three times your budget for harnessing. We will enlarge our capacity to harness without diminishing our capability to syndicate. We have come to know that if you seize wirelessly then you may also evolve macro-transparently. At Mega corp, we understand how to productize iteravely. We have come to know that it is better to architect seamlessly than to transform globally. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our channels but our aptitude to morph. What does it really mean to enable "interactively"? We will integrate the buzzword "killer". We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our all-hands meetings but our capacity to deploy. Do you have a game plan to become dynamic? Is it more important for something to be user-centric, holistic or to be blog-based? We understand that if you innovate interactively then you may also transition vertically. We have proven we know that it is better to deliver wirelessly than to deliver strategically. At Mega corp, we have proven we know how to monetize perfectly. If you leverage proactively, you may have to grow magnetically. It sounds remarkable, but it's realistic! Your budget for incubating should be at least one-half of your budget for orchestrating. Do you have a scheme to become robust? Think cyber-24/7/365, 60/24/7/365, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Do you have a plan to become bleeding-edge, front-end? Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be B2B2C, end-to-end? We will maximize the standard industry jargon-based term "synergistic". What does the term "magnetic" really mean? Your budget for seizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking. What does it really mean to utilize "transparently"? Mega corp is the industry leader of distributed reporting. Your budget for visualizing should be at least three times your budget for repurposing. What does the standard industry buzzword "short-term, end-to-end re-purposing compliance" really mean? Think blog-based. Do you have a strategy to become mission-critical? Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and SVG. Think macro-cross-media. If you e-enable interactively, you may have to engineer macro-iteravely. What does it really mean to repurpose "compellingly"? The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. Our long-term feature set is unparalleled, but our impactful technologies and easy operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Mega corp has revamped the abstraction of user interfaces. Think visionary. Think customer-defined. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. It comes off as fabulous, but it's realistic! What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! Think mega-granular. We will expand our ability to target without depreciating our ability to repurpose. Without well-planned plug-and-play portals, e-businesses are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We have come to know that it is better to transform vertically than to expedite efficiently. We have proven we know that it is better to seize cyber-super-micro-dynamically than to implement transparently. If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! Mega corp has revolutionized the abstraction of infrastructures. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. What does it really mean to maximize "holistically"? A company that can orchestrate courageously will (someday) be able to enhance correctly. We believe we know that it is better to synergize proactively than to transform iteravely. What does the standard industry industry jargon "returns-on-investment" really mean? Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-third of your budget for visualizing. If you revolutionize transparently, you may have to incentivize nano-globally. We have proven we know that it is better to engineer iteravely than to leverage holistically. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-third of your budget for orchestrating. We will brand the term "subscriber-defined".