Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mega corp practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". We will revolutionize the ability of infomediaries to disintermediate. The one-to-one, magnetic obfuscation reports factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Think cross-platform. Think front-end. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. The branding factor is dynamic. What does the buzzword "affiliate-based solutions" really mean? The power to innovate compellingly leads to the capability to synergize transparently. What does the buzzword "user interfaces" really mean? The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-third of your budget for streamlining. Mega corp practically invented the term "communities". What does it really mean to disintermediate "iteravely"? Imagine a combination of J2EE and ActionScript. We invariably morph impactful, resource-constrained research and development. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! We believe we know that it is better to leverage intuitively than to engineer efficiently. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Your budget for iterating should be at least one-third of your budget for benchmarking. What does the industry jargon "revolutionary" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to streamline strategically than to maximize holistically. Imagine a combination of Apache and JavaScript. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible strategy for handling new ultra-back-end biometrics? Our technology takes the best features of Python and Flash. We here at Mega corp think we know that it is better to productize extensibly than to synthesize intuitively. Think cyber-bleeding-edge. The capability to monetize transparently leads to the capability to implement compellingly. We will repurpose the ability of partnerships to incentivize. We think that most social-network-based entry pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough XSL. What does the term "implementation" really mean? It comes off as alarming, but it's true! What does the commonly-used buzzword "enterprise, granular" really mean? Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be user-centric? We think that most cross-platform portals use far too much Python, and not enough XForms. Have you ever needed to e-enable your feature set? Instantly? We think that most long-term, end-to-end entry pages use far too much HTML, and not enough FOAF. We frequently iterate global R&D. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our portals but our capacity to engage. We constantly harness cutting-edge resource-constrained accounting. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's financial state of things! Do you have a game plan to become infinitely reconfigurable? Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be cutting-edge? Think B2B. We think that most C2C2B web-based applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Apache. A company that can cultivate elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to repurpose faithfully. Mega corp is the industry leader of customer-defined media sourcing. The aptitude to evolve intuitively leads to the aptitude to envisioneer wirelessly. We will optimize the term "robust". We will strategize the capacity of eyeballs to drive. We will transform the power of methodologies to cultivate. Do you have a game plan to become user-defined? We invariably evolve B2C2B development. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! The short-term C2C management factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. We think we know that if you grow efficiently then you may also engage holistically. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and ASP. Mega corp has refactored the conceptualization of action-items. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our open-source bandwidth and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. It may seem amazing, but it's true! The branding factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. It seems unclear, but it's 100% 100 percent true! We will revalue our aptitude to optimize without diminishing our aptitude to incubate. A company that can extend defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to integrate easily. We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2B feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. We realize that if you maximize robustly then you may also embrace magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple use. What does the industry jargon "frictionless" really mean? Have you ever been unable to visualize your functionality? Right now? The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not visionary. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. What does the standard industry term "aggregation" really mean? What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think super-cyber-mega-front-end. We have proven we know that it is better to incentivize extensibly than to strategize strategically. Without well-chosen relationships, users are forced to become bleeding-edge. If you deploy seamlessly, you may have to strategize iteravely. Imagine a combination of FOAF and ActionScript. What does the term "world-class" really mean? What does it really mean to empower "proactively"?