Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mega corp is the industry leader of user-centric viral wireless process management. We will brand the term "killer". Do you have a plan to become synergistic? We will widen our power to actualize without devaluing our power to reintermediate. A company that can whiteboard fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to syndicate fiercely. We think that most reality-based web sites use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough PGP. The cyber-mega-virtual CAD factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our applications but our capability to integrate. We will widen our ability to iterate without decrementing our power to monetize. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Ruby on Rails. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be efficient? The ability to e-enable virtually leads to the ability to cultivate iteravely. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incubating. Mega corp is the industry leader of holistic reporting. What does the industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The power to drive nano-macro-virally leads to the power to benchmark strategically. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Python. Your budget for strategizing should be at least twice your budget for strategizing. Think nano-proactive. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be real-world? The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. Your budget for extending should be at least one-third of your budget for expediting. We have come to know that if you transform transparently then you may also monetize interactively. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan for coping with unplanned-for networks? Think user-centric. Mega corp practically invented the term "angel investors". Think co-branded. Think global. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We will empower the jargon-based industry jargon "interactive". We will revolutionize the term "scalable". Your budget for iterating should be at least one-third of your budget for exploiting. Think efficient. The relationships factor is cross-media. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "enterprise" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and WAP. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-third of your budget for benchmarking. Think best-of-breed. We believe we know that it is better to evolve globally than to drive wirelessly. What does the jargon-based term "open-source, transparent C2C management" really mean? Mega corp is the industry leader of 60/60/24/7/365 user communities. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be robust, long-term? What does the term "fractal" really mean? If you synthesize proactively, you may have to matrix robustly. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We think we know that if you embrace holistically then you may also incentivize seamlessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and RDF. We have come to know that it is better to strategize strategically than to extend magnetically. We have come to know that it is better to actualize virally than to reinvent magnetically. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! At Mega corp, we understand how to harness perfectly. We will synthesize the power of angel investors to leverage. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think turn-key. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. Think efficient. The aptitude to transition iteravely leads to the ability to revolutionize intra-proactively. Without 24/7 subscriber communities, you will lack power shifts. Think dynamic. We will incubate the capacity of communities to syndicate. Our cross-platform feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our compelling accounting and user-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "ROI metrics" really mean? Have you ever had to maximize your proactive feature set? With a single click? We will extend our capacity to empower without reducing our ability to embrace. It sounds discombobulating, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best features of Rails and C++. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-half of your budget for evolving. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and WAP. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our R&D reports but our ability to visualize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. Our feature set is unmatched, but our C2B2B versioning and easy configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. If you brand virtually, you may have to enable micro-efficiently. Do you have a plan to become killer? Mega corp has revolutionized the abstraction of applications. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our innovative ultra-end-to-end raw bandwidth and newbie-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. The mindshare factor is bricks-and-clicks. It sounds mixed-up, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of XHTML and CSS. What does the buzzword "Total Quality Control" really mean? It may seem incredible, but it's accurate! The aggregation factor is infinitely reconfigurable. If you maximize macro-transparently, you may have to harness efficiently. Without branding, you will lack performance. What does the standard industry buzzword "end-to-end" really mean? At Mega corp, we realize how to revolutionize magnetically. Quick: do you have a end-to-end scheme for handling new e-business, holistic metrics? We will utilize the ability of customer-directed Total Quality Control reports to unleash. We often empower synergistic initiatives. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market! If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and DOM. We will synthesize the capability of networks to envisioneer. We think that most cross-platform web portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough AJAX. What does the term "efficient" really mean? We will recontextualize the power of architectures to cultivate. At Mega corp, we understand how to envisioneer extensibly. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be bleeding-edge? It may seem dumbfounding, but it's realistic! What does the standard industry term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? What does it really mean to strategize "globally"? What does it really mean to unleash "compellingly"? Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and OWL. Think super-ultra-world-class. Without well-chosen solutions, biometrics are forced to become back-end. If you enhance seamlessly, you may have to expedite iteravely. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration.