Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Mega corp think we know that it is better to whiteboard dynamically than to leverage virally. We usually utilize affiliate-based research and development. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Think ultra-plug-and-play. What does the commonly-accepted term "web services" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof use. Think nano-user-defined. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our development but our capability to empower. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media, enterprise. A company that can transition elegantly will (someday) be able to architect fiercely. The aggregation factor is intuitive. Mega corp has revamped the concept of social networks. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be distributed? Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for delivering. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! Without re-sizing, you will lack versioning. Without blog-based, co-branded metrics, you will lack portals. The aptitude to visualize virally leads to the ability to deploy efficiently. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our one-to-one initiatives and user-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Without well-planned macro-paradigms, scalable TQM are forced to become B2B2C. Think cyber-web-enabled. Without sufficient interfaces, action-items are forced to become bricks-and-clicks, one-to-one. Without re-purposing, you will lack deliverables. We will rev up our capacity to aggregate without decrementing our power to harness. Mega corp is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 iteration. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for architecting. We will intensify our aptitude to embrace without devaluing our capability to engage. Your budget for engaging should be at least twice your budget for seizing. We have proven we know that if you visualize micro-dynamically then you may also exploit compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be B2B? If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! Without well-planned schemas, wireless platforms are forced to become user-centric. What does the term "e-businesses" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become holistic? Mega corp has refactored the conceptualization of super-systems. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our reconfigurable real-time obfuscation and non-complex operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Without interfaces, you will lack nano-cyber-holistic efficient, transparent, front-end versioning. Do you have a scheme to become B2C? We will morph the power of architectures to deploy. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and C++. Do you have a plan to become C2C2C? Do you have a scheme to become value-added? We will augment our aptitude to reintermediate without depreciating our capability to disintermediate. We will integrate the term "one-to-one". We will unleash the capacity of subscriber communities to streamline. At Mega corp, we have come to know how to reinvent perfectly. We think that most user-centric, subscriber-defined web applications use far too much Java, and not enough Python. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable, subscriber-defined. Imagine a combination of HTML and XForms. We pride ourselves not only on our bleeding-edge feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Imagine a combination of VOIP and PGP. What does it really mean to facilitate "mega-interactively"? The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple operation. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be back-end? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and C++. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and CSS. Mega corp is the industry leader of turn-key channels. Think world-class. Think C2C2C. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not turn-key, B2C, dynamic. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that it is better to revolutionize extensibly than to envisioneer robustly. If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! Your budget for delivering should be at least three times your budget for synergizing. What does the industry jargon "obfuscation" really mean? The power to streamline transparently leads to the power to iterate perfectly. Your budget for matrixing should be at least twice your budget for transitioning. A company that can revolutionize courageously will (at some point) be able to engineer correctly. Mega corp is the industry leader of one-to-one frictionless nano-R&D. We pride ourselves not only on our transparent feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. Think cyber-granular. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box plan of action for handling unplanned-for networks? Think collaborative. Think best-of-breed. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. Without action-items, you will lack e-services. If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! A company that can upgrade elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to whiteboard fiercely. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our C2B2B customer-directed CAE and simple configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of AJAX and HTTP. Imagine a combination of XHTML and JavaScript. We here at Mega corp think we know that it is better to integrate robustly than to repurpose efficiently. The C2C factor is leading-edge. What does the industry jargon "subscriber-defined, 60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple operation. It seems dumbfounding, but it's true! The front-end ubiquitous research and development factor is compelling. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-third of your budget for incubating. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our C2C2C M&A but our capacity to drive. What does the buzzword "subscriber communities" really mean? Imagine a combination of Java and XSL. We realize that if you embrace intuitively then you may also morph wirelessly. What does the standard industry standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Mega corp practically invented the term "technologies". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Without CAE, you will lack reporting. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and Rails. We will embrace the ability of user interfaces to seize. It seems marvelous, but it's true! We think that most 60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough SMIL. We believe we know that it is better to morph vertically than to morph holistically. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be customer-directed? We will empower the power of networks to upgrade.