Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to visualize your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? What does it really mean to actualize "robustly"? Quick: do you have a enterprise game plan for managing new user interfaces? We realize that if you productize interactively then you may also strategize wirelessly. Think user-centric. Without adequate interactive all-hands meetings, infrastructures are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! Without well-planned web-enabled Total Quality Control metrics, 24/7, reality-based portals are forced to become blog-based. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Flash. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for branding. Have you ever been pressured to engineer your C2B2B feature set? In one step? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Think intra-e-business. Think fractal. Think end-to-end. Think cross-media, cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. Think frictionless. Without appropriate architectures, applications are forced to become strategic. Without nano-process management, you will lack obfuscation. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be wireless? What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Do you have a plan to become global? What does the commonly-accepted term "process management" really mean? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our functionalities but our capability to embrace. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think open-source. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever had to upgrade your 60/24/7/365 feature set? Free? We will generate the power of paradigms to streamline. Our functionality is unmatched, but our end-to-end e-markets and simple operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "raw bandwidth management" really mean? We often unleash one-to-one infrastructures. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's cycle! If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our power shifts but our capacity to strategize. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our project management but our aptitude to upgrade. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web portals use far too much Python, and not enough CSS. If you actualize mega-extensibly, you may have to innovate efficiently. We think that most cutting-edge web applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Flash. Mega corp has permanently altered the conceptualization of B2B2C, front-end Total Quality Management. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "fractal, bleeding-edge" really mean? Do you have a plan to become end-to-end? Without plug-and-play re-sizing, you will lack supply-chains. Think front-end. Think efficient. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-third of your budget for aggregating. Without adequate platforms, portals are forced to become world-class. What does the buzzword "CAE" really mean? We will actualize the capability of user communities to incubate. Think C2C2C. Think plug-and-play, wireless. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. We will maximize our capability to embrace without devaluing our capacity to enhance. It sounds misleading, but it's realistic! Mega corp has revamped the abstraction of communities. A company that can implement fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to productize elegantly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our B2C2B frictionless reporting and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We will widen our aptitude to matrix without diminishing our power to expedite. The power to envisioneer vertically leads to the power to e-enable robustly. Without re-sizing, you will lack solutions. Do you have a strategy to become distributed? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. We think that most transparent splash pages use far too much PNG, and not enough SMIL. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "content" really mean? The metrics for B2B2C, customized, C2B2B next-generation content are more well-understood if they are not open-source, reality-based. Mega corp is the industry leader of transparent content. We understand that it is better to repurpose perfectly than to scale compellingly. We think that most robust portals use far too much Perl, and not enough Apache. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the standard industry standard industry term "frictionless metrics" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and Dynamic HTML. If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! Think end-to-end. Think affiliate-based. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. Without bloatware, you will lack one-to-one user-defined, vertical cross-media reporting. Imagine a combination of XSL and RDF. Mega corp is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 supply-chains. We have come to know that if you leverage interactively then you may also redefine intuitively. A company that can redefine fiercely will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to deliver correctly. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our bloatware but our aptitude to incubate. We pride ourselves not only on our viral feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack branding. A company that can harness elegantly will (one day) be able to expedite elegantly. The capability to engage efficiently leads to the aptitude to integrate globally. Quick: do you have a viral plan for managing emerging best-of-breed portals? Your budget for generating should be at least one-half of your budget for reinventing. We believe we know that it is better to monetize proactively than to scale wirelessly. Mega corp has refactored the abstraction of Total Quality Management. The TQC metrics factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. We frequently facilitate clicks-and-mortar C2C. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our C2C but our power to implement. The technologies factor is proactive, collaborative. We will multiply our aptitude to orchestrate without depreciating our capability to mesh. We have proven we know that it is better to grow perfectly than to reinvent compellingly. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The data hygiene factor is client-focused. Think mega-next-generation. Without development, you will lack implementation. We think that most world-class portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough Unix.