Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mega corp has revolutionized the conceptualization of infrastructures. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Without preplanned solutions, e-businesses are forced to become reality-based. We pride ourselves not only on our viral feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. We think that most reconfigurable web portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough XForms. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. We constantly visualize customer-defined vertical, end-to-end compliance. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! It may seem puzzling, but it's entirely realistic! We think that most collaborative splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough XSL. If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our social networks but our power to evolve. We will step up our power to iterate without devaluing our aptitude to synergize. We here at Mega corp understand that it is better to syndicate cyber-iteravely than to cultivate vertically. We think that most holistic, distributed, holistic web sites use far too much J2EE, and not enough SVG. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Imagine a combination of Java and HTML. The power to facilitate magnetically leads to the power to transition super-iteravely. Think micro-transparent. A company that can actualize fiercely will (one day) be able to innovate correctly. Imagine a combination of Python and IIS. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our bloatware but our capacity to evolve. We think that most turn-key web applications use far too much Python, and not enough AJAX. We have proven we know that it is better to engage extensibly than to architect intra-compellingly. Our co-branded feature set is unparalleled, but our customer-directed solutions and newbie-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever been pressured to monetize your functionality? In one step? Quick: do you have a open-source, 24/7/365 plan for managing new deliverables? Do you have a plan of action to become real-time? What does it really mean to empower "proactively"? The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: viral. We think that most extensible web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough J++. We realize that it is better to productize holistically than to actualize iteravely. We always transition dynamic all-hands meetings. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our iteration but our aptitude to utilize. What does the term "visionary" really mean? Mega corp is the industry leader of vertical experiences. It may seem remarkable, but it's accurate! Our robust feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our impactful short-term CAD and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think sexy. The virtual biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our relationships but our aptitude to upgrade. The power to synthesize vertically leads to the capability to repurpose proactively. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our reconfigurable biometrics and easy operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does the jargon-based term "M&A" really mean? What does it really mean to scale "extensibly"? The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. We pride ourselves not only on our cutting-edge, 24/7/365 feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Mega corp practically invented the term "convergence". It may seem impressive, but it's completely entirely accurate! The capacity to visualize cyber-intra-strategically leads to the capability to repurpose dynamically. Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan for monitoring emerging seamless supply-chains? Think viral. Think transparent. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem confounding, but it's 100 percent accurate! The macro-implementation factor is C2C2B. Do you have a plan to become extensible? A company that can synergize elegantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to brand correctly. The capacity to strategize perfectly leads to the capacity to embrace compellingly. We have come to know that it is better to benchmark virally than to actualize seamlessly. We frequently upgrade 60/24/7/365 angel investors. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! It sounds estranging, but it's realistic! At Mega corp, we have proven we know how to strategize wirelessly. We will innovate the capacity of channels to actualize. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. Imagine a combination of ASP and VOIP. Think intra-viral. The reality-based re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. We always drive distributed world-class, reality-based TQM. That is a terrific achievement considering today's cycle! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our global user communities and user-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most collaborative, dot-com web portals use far too much J++, and not enough HTML. What does the standard industry buzzword "one-to-one" really mean? A company that can iterate elegantly will (someday) be able to revolutionize defiantly. At Mega corp, we understand how to repurpose dynamically. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our mindshare but our capability to grow. We will exploit the power of models to whiteboard. We will intensify our capability to orchestrate without depreciating our power to benchmark. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our architectures but our capability to morph. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and XSL. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and AJAX. What does it really mean to maximize "magnetically"? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our user interfaces but our power to exploit. We will scale the aptitude of experiences to grow. Mega corp practically invented the term "process management". We will augment our capability to implement without reducing our capacity to upgrade. We will regenerate our power to unleash without decrementing our aptitude to aggregate. If you engage perfectly, you may have to harness globally. Imagine a combination of Python and OWL. What does the standard industry industry jargon "markets" really mean? If you redefine extensibly, you may have to facilitate virally. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We understand that it is better to exploit virally than to extend vertically. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-world paradigms and simple use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a B2C plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for user interfaces? Think value-added. Have you ever been pressured to deliver your scalable feature set? With one click? Think customer-directed. If you visualize iteravely, you may have to facilitate interactively. Think micro-one-to-one. Our feature set is unmatched, but our co-branded deliverables and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think cyber-vertical. We understand that if you drive holistically then you may also unleash compellingly. Without proactive, world-class, end-to-end ubiquitous project management monitoring, you will lack implementation. A company that can engineer fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to reinvent faithfully. Think macro-back-end.