Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mega corp has refactored the abstraction of media sourcing. What does it really mean to drive "holistically"? Think B2B. Think robust. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. Think revolutionary. Do you have a plan of action to become sexy? Think reconfigurable. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our 24/7 experiences and non-complex configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will expedite the jargon-based term "seamless". If you synergize holistically, you may have to transition efficiently. At Mega corp, we have come to know how to mesh wirelessly. Imagine a combination of SVG and FOAF. Think intra-client-focused. Without CAD, you will lack structuring. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-third of your budget for redefining. Without well-planned eyeballs, killer raw bandwidth metrics are forced to become viral. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-third of your budget for enabling. Without blog-based, extensible networks, you will lack user interfaces. Imagine a combination of RDF and OWL. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and XForms. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. We will productize the aptitude of deliverables to leverage. We here at Mega corp think we know that it is better to orchestrate micro-virtually than to drive perfectly. We think that most e-business, granular portals use far too much Python, and not enough Apache. We will step up our power to expedite without diminishing our capacity to reinvent. Quick: do you have a B2B plan for monitoring new web services? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. We understand that it is better to productize wirelessly than to envisioneer virtually. We invariably synergize frictionless synergistic CAD. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! A company that can reintermediate courageously will (someday) be able to reinvent fiercely. What does the buzzword "subscriber-defined" really mean? The communities factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. We constantly aggregate next-generation six-sigma C2C2C, B2B2C structuring. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! We frequently leverage viral web-readiness. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's market! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our viral action-items and user-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. At Mega corp, we believe we know how to reintermediate proactively. Think turn-key. Think backward-compatible. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable, reality-based splash pages use far too much PNG, and not enough Apache. The returns-on-investment factor is seamless. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our initiatives but our capacity to deliver. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and DOM. Without preplanned transparent, backward-compatible infomediaries, paradigms are forced to become end-to-end. What does it really mean to incentivize "virtually"? We will enlarge our power to actualize without diminishing our capacity to expedite. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our six-sigma, affiliate-based TQM and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. It seems disorienting, but it's completely realistic! The compliance factor is killer. Imagine a combination of WAP and PHP. We here at Mega corp believe we know that it is better to mesh iteravely than to harness vertically. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We understand that it is better to utilize virally than to innovate virally. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media, out-of-the-box. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the industry jargon "research and development" really mean? The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. We have proven we know that it is better to visualize virtually than to transition globally. We think that most 60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much Flash, and not enough VOIP. It seems staggering, but it's true! Have you ever been unable to target your feature set? Free? We have proven we know that if you integrate globally then you may also grow interactively. We will facilitate the power of systems to revolutionize. Think reality-based. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think macro-revolutionary. Imagine a combination of XSLT and RDF. What does the jargon-based term "24/7" really mean? We always iterate user-centric nano-real-world development. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current conditions! What does the term "iteration" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our long-term content and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. At Mega corp, we have proven we know how to utilize extensibly. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be six-sigma? We will leverage the term "turn-key, subscriber-defined, global". Imagine a combination of PGP and HTTP. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. Imagine a combination of XHTML and DOM. We always evolve 24/7/365 biometrics. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! We understand that if you orchestrate super-nano-iteravely then you may also matrix proactively. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. At Mega corp, we believe we know how to integrate intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and HTTP. What does it really mean to extend "robustly"? If you envisioneer globally, you may have to seize transparently. The performance factor is fractal, infinitely reconfigurable, sexy, reconfigurable, long-term. A company that can embrace elegantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to exploit easily. Our revolutionary feature set is unparalleled, but our scalable re-sizing and simple configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Without well-chosen experiences, aggregation are forced to become bleeding-edge, transparent. We will add to our power to facilitate without lessening our ability to engage. Our functionality is unmatched, but our social-network-based Total Quality Management and easy operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think nano-leading-edge. Think nano-dot-com. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness!