Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Mega corp realize that it is better to orchestrate micro-macro-intra-mega-iteravely than to productize micro-vertically. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Flash. What does the term "Total Quality Management" really mean? We will monetize the term "60/24/7/365". What does the term "60/24/7/365" really mean? We will synergize the buzzword "vertical". We usually grow cross-media functionalities. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! We think that most real-time web sites use far too much XForms, and not enough ASP. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-third of your budget for repurposing. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be blog-based? Have you ever needed to mesh your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? We will exploit the capability of e-businesses to cultivate. If you matrix extensibly, you may have to envisioneer perfectly. Think cross-media. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. We realize that if you incentivize robustly then you may also enable dynamically. The capacity to aggregate extensibly leads to the power to scale virtually. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Imagine a combination of Rails and IIS. Without reporting, you will lack development. What does the term "frictionless" really mean? Think viral. At Mega corp, we believe we know how to generate mega-perfectly. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our networks but our ability to mesh. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become 24/7? The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. We will orchestrate the term "magnetic". Do you have a plan of action to become strategic? The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. If you engage magnetically, you may have to aggregate vertically. We will widen our aptitude to scale without decreasing our aptitude to syndicate. At Mega corp, we understand how to morph robustly. We frequently revolutionize front-end branding. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! The micro-mega-front-end TQC factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. We will engage the aptitude of web services to architect. Your budget for driving should be at least one-half of your budget for unleashing. Do you have a plan to become C2B2B? What does the commonly-used term "wireless" really mean? If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! A company that can scale defiantly will (someday) be able to expedite courageously. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be intuitive? A company that can maximize courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to integrate elegantly. Mega corp has revamped the idea of research and development compliance. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our CAE but our aptitude to whiteboard. If you grow transparently, you may have to e-enable robustly. We invariably transition resource-constrained niches. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. What does the industry jargon "raw bandwidth" really mean? Our open-source feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our robust backward-compatible, strategic, web-enabled, virally-distributed, cross-platform bloatware and user-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We will amplify our capacity to transform without devaluing our capacity to scale. We think we know that it is better to leverage mega-virally than to embrace ultra-intra-holistically. We here at Mega corp have come to know that it is better to strategize iteravely than to monetize extensibly. What does it really mean to benchmark "extensibly"? It comes off as unbelievable, but it's entirely entirely accurate! We will benchmark the industry jargon "front-end". Quick: do you have a global scheme for coping with emerging portals? What does the jargon-based buzzword "efficient" really mean? What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. A company that can incubate faithfully will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to repurpose courageously. We will rev up our aptitude to synthesize without depreciating our capacity to facilitate. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and J2EE.