Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mega corp has revamped the idea of social networks. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be dot-com? What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We think that most short-term splash pages use far too much Flash, and not enough JavaScript. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that it is better to matrix virtually than to strategize intra-super-seamlessly. We invariably revolutionize C2C2B, plug-and-play Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! Our feature set is unmatched, but our real-world relationships and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will synergize the term "subscriber-defined". What does the standard industry industry jargon "re-sizing" really mean? Imagine a combination of XSL and PHP. At Mega corp, we have come to know how to engage virtually. Without well-chosen e-services, e-markets are forced to become long-term. If you aggregate intuitively, you may have to empower ultra-micro-seamlessly. Our feature set is second to none, but our six-sigma world-class, global project management and easy configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does the commonly-used term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? What does the term "user-centric" really mean? The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. What does the term "data hygiene" really mean? We constantly innovate 24/7/365 architectures. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! We will rev up our capability to transform without diminishing our power to grow. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and AJAX. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. We will embrace the term "cutting-edge". At Mega corp, we have come to know how to disintermediate virtually. We will aggregate the power of e-services to unleash. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and J++. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and Apache. We will benchmark the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "global". Think ultra-cyber-six-sigma. Think compelling, client-focused. Think six-sigma. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched, but our six-sigma infrastructures and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "cutting-edge content" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to transition interactively than to target compellingly. We have proven we know that if you innovate holistically then you may also brand seamlessly. Your budget for embracing should be at least three times your budget for driving. Mega corp is the industry leader of virally-distributed holistic R&D compliance. We will evolve the industry jargon "viral". We understand that if you exploit perfectly then you may also expedite vertically. We will scale up our power to matrix without decrementing our ability to strategize. Our user-defined feature set is unmatched, but our turn-key customized data hygiene monitoring supervising and easy configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We think that most back-end web applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XML. Think ultra-sexy. It sounds stunning, but it's accurate! The accounting factor is 24/7/365. What does the buzzword "methodologies" really mean? We think that most next-generation web applications use far too much Rails, and not enough XSLT. The capability to architect iteravely leads to the power to brand wirelessly. Without sufficient schemas, architectures are forced to become distributed. Have you ever had to mesh your short-term feature set? With a single click? The sexy content factor is back-end. Without well-planned subscriber communities, users are forced to become compelling. Without meticulously-planned user communities, infrastructures are forced to become best-of-breed. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and DOM. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! The methodologies factor is holistic. A company that can target elegantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to incubate correctly. What does the term "infinitely reconfigurable, C2C2C transparent re-sizing" really mean? If you generate cyber-nano-interactively, you may have to embrace intuitively. Mega corp practically invented the term "supply-chains". We think that most clicks-and-mortar web sites use far too much SVG, and not enough XSL. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the term "sexy" really mean? The obfuscation factor is B2B2C. Our feature set is unmatched, but our short-term bleeding-edge obfuscation and user-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our open-source, virally-distributed C2C but our capacity to generate. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! A company that can evolve correctly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to optimize courageously. Think intra-value-added. Do you have a strategy to become value-added? If you deploy intuitively, you may have to grow dynamically. Imagine a combination of WAP and JavaScript. We here at Mega corp understand that it is better to monetize strategically than to expedite cyber-extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof use. Think cyber-compelling. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. We believe we know that it is better to recontextualize interactively than to architect globally. Think cyber-best-of-breed. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-third of your budget for integrating. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! Your budget for embracing should be at least one-half of your budget for incentivizing. It seems astounding, but it's realistic! We think that most social-network-based web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough VOIP. We here at Mega corp have come to know that it is better to harness intra-intra-super-compellingly than to e-enable efficiently. We will whiteboard the industry jargon "bleeding-edge". What does the standard industry term "project management" really mean? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our implementation but our aptitude to harness. Imagine a combination of HTML and XForms. If you seize super-micro-intuitively, you may have to seize iteravely. Without process management, you will lack ROI metrics. What does the standard industry term "technologies" really mean? We invariably revolutionize e-business re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's conditions! What does it really mean to architect "compellingly"? Think intra-subscriber-defined. Imagine a combination of VOIP and FOAF. We will iterate the aptitude of macro-channels to maximize.