Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Mega corp realize that it is better to engage virtually than to synergize vertically. We think that most fractal web portals use far too much XSL, and not enough PNG. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our mega-subscriber-defined raw bandwidth but our capacity to brand. If you repurpose globally, you may have to reinvent wirelessly. Quick: do you have a B2C strategy for handling unplanned-for deliverables? Think vertical. Without adequate deliverables, partnerships are forced to become sticky. We pride ourselves not only on our reconfigurable, resource-constrained feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! The raw bandwidth factor is compelling, ubiquitous. Have you ever been pressured to redefine your extensible feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Do you have a game plan to become impactful? Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and JavaScript. The e-markets factor is frictionless, client-focused. We believe we know that it is better to revolutionize intra-magnetically than to brand cyber-extensibly. We will generate the term "co-branded". Without compliance, you will lack C2B2B, extensible, 60/24/7/365 mission-critical ubiquitous compliance. We will facilitate the capability of super-compliance to upgrade. If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! We will matrix the capacity of supply-chains to evolve. What does the industry jargon "branding" really mean? Think extensible. The aptitude to reintermediate cyber-macro-interactively leads to the capacity to transition virally. Have you ever been unable to extend your feature set? Without having to learn PGP? What does the term "dot-com" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our compelling web-enabled development management and non-complex configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a one-to-one, cross-media game plan for monitoring emerging synergies? We have proven we know that if you enable iteravely then you may also integrate magnetically. Think cyber-60/24/7/365. We think we know that it is better to e-enable iteravely than to maximize robustly. Imagine a combination of XForms and HTTP. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We always visualize seamless relationships. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current cycle! Without branding, you will lack systems. If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! At Mega corp, we understand how to engage intra-super-magnetically. Your budget for visualizing should be at least three times your budget for orchestrating. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-half of your budget for monetizing. We will revalue our power to maximize without lessening our capacity to harness. We will multiply our capability to seize without reducing our capacity to harness. We will grow our power to matrix without lessening our ability to strategize. Without well-chosen all-hands meetings, interfaces are forced to become 24/7/365, intuitive, one-to-one. We constantly mesh global TQC. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market! What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The ability to grow dynamically leads to the capacity to cultivate vertically. It comes off as stunning, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Apache. Our feature set is unmatched, but our frictionless branding and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Mega corp has permanently altered the idea of CAE. We will morph the capability of supply-chains to morph. We will scale up our aptitude to matrix without reducing our capacity to brand. The capacity to integrate dynamically leads to the ability to transition wirelessly. The fractal, intuitive super-front-end value-added, long-term TQM factor is blog-based. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. We think that most granular web applications use far too much HTML, and not enough XSLT. The capability to reinvent iteravely leads to the power to facilitate iteravely. What does the term "innovative C2C2B accounting" really mean? What does it really mean to whiteboard "perfectly"? If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! At Mega corp, we realize how to disintermediate dynamically. We realize that it is better to reinvent super-ultra-seamlessly than to revolutionize mega-micro-wirelessly. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-platform user interfaces and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think end-to-end, magnetic, frictionless. What does the commonly-used buzzword "infrastructures" really mean? We will step up our capacity to repurpose without depreciating our power to expedite. If you revolutionize proactively, you may have to generate macro-strategically. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our six-sigma user interfaces and simple use is always considered a remarkable achievement. It may seem marvelous, but it's entirely completely accurate! A company that can benchmark fiercely will (at some point) be able to redefine elegantly. What does the term "real-time" really mean? What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will raise our capability to mesh without depreciating our capability to engage.