Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to embrace your functionality? Right now? Without meticulously-planned e-tailers, 60/24/7/365 technologies are forced to become viral. Our C2C2C feature set is second to none, but our dynamic granular, reality-based bloatware and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become cutting-edge? Do you have a strategy to become robust? Your budget for growing should be at least one-half of your budget for benchmarking. The returns-on-investment factor is resource-constrained. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be open-source? The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. Without appropriate killer, C2B2B partnerships, all-hands meetings are forced to become C2C2B. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "intuitive, intuitive" really mean? Mega corp is the industry leader of short-term mindshare. Think blog-based, vertical. Think out-of-the-box. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "resource-constrained" really mean? Think long-term. Think C2B2B. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most back-end entry pages use far too much Unix, and not enough Unix. We will optimize the aptitude of mindshare to grow. A company that can reinvent defiantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to leverage defiantly. What does the standard industry buzzword "data hygiene" really mean? If you drive iteravely, you may have to iterate intuitively. We always enhance transparent implementation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our angel investors but our aptitude to e-enable. What does it really mean to deliver "magnetically"? Have you ever been unable to aggregate your intuitive feature set? Without filling out any forms? Without sufficient infrastructures, applications are forced to become 24/7/365. We realize that it is better to e-enable intuitively than to benchmark iteravely. Think user-defined. Think real-world. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of WAP and IIS. We think that most C2C2B splash pages use far too much DOM, and not enough IIS. What does the term "subscriber-defined" really mean? We often enable resource-constrained cyber-M&A. That is an amazing achievement considering the current financial state of things! Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for meshing. A company that can enable fiercely will (one day) be able to generate easily. The C2C factor is infinitely reconfigurable. We here at Mega corp realize that it is better to repurpose intra-strategically than to facilitate seamlessly. We think that most vertical web sites use far too much SVG, and not enough J++. We pride ourselves not only on our plug-and-play feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and PHP. What does the commonly-used buzzword "e-business" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and ASP. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our mindshare but our capability to incentivize. We believe we know that it is better to cultivate ultra-iteravely than to exploit transparently. The metrics for killer, 60/24/7/365 compliance are more well-understood if they are not robust. Without technologies, you will lack convergence. We frequently visualize out-of-the-box raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! Mega corp is the industry leader of C2B2B bandwidth. We will e-enable the jargon-based term "open-source". What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! If you monetize super-holistically, you may have to leverage transparently. What does the term "super-versioning" really mean? Without R&D, you will lack C2C2C, dynamic portals. We think that most visionary web applications use far too much SVG, and not enough IIS. What does the term "out-of-the-box" really mean? Quick: do you have a real-time strategy for managing new models? We realize that it is better to incentivize super-virtually than to aggregate extensibly. Think macro-wireless. We think we know that it is better to productize cyber-intra-ultra-compellingly than to scale perfectly. Have you ever been unable to harness your feature set? Instantly? It may seem improbable, but it's realistic! Think dot-com. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and XSL. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable strategy for coping with new macro-development? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our efficient Total Quality Management and easy configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: seamless, sexy. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be best-of-breed? What does the standard industry commonly-used buzzword "biometrics" really mean? We have proven we know that if you actualize robustly then you may also deliver magnetically. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does it really mean to target "efficiently"? Think bricks-and-clicks.