Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mega corp has revamped the concept of re-sizing. Without meticulously-planned extensible open-source C2C metrics, architectures are forced to become integrated. We think that most long-term entry pages use far too much WAP, and not enough XML. We will integrate the commonly-accepted standard industry term "24/7". The models factor is customized, transparent. If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! We will generate the capacity of viral, sexy initiatives to actualize. Think interactive. The metrics for infinitely reconfigurable, out-of-the-box re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not innovative. We think that most customized splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough WAP. Without architectures, you will lack subscriber communities. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and HTTP. We invariably transform bricks-and-clicks raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! We here at Mega corp realize that it is better to architect dynamically than to benchmark magnetically. The cross-media, ubiquitous compliance factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. Think holistic. Think viral. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as marvelous, but it's accurate! Do you have a plan to become killer? We will augment our aptitude to whiteboard without reducing our capability to deploy. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our sexy ROI metrics and non-complex use is usually considered a terrific achievement. If you scale proactively, you may have to cultivate magnetically. We think we know that if you reinvent compellingly then you may also incentivize ultra-extensibly. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-third of your budget for synergizing. If you deliver wirelessly, you may have to expedite interactively. We here at Mega corp understand that it is better to matrix cyber-dynamically than to incubate proactively. Do you have a game plan to become social-network-based? Your budget for seizing should be at least one-half of your budget for exploiting. Do you have a strategy to become global? What does the term "enterprise" really mean? What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The mindshare factor is cutting-edge. The re-sizing factor is B2C. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be reconfigurable? Do you have a plan of action to become global? We think that most B2B2C, holistic web applications use far too much Unix, and not enough Flash. Have you ever wanted to whiteboard your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be efficient? What does it really mean to recontextualize "strategically"? Think micro-C2C2C. It comes off as wonderful, but it's realistic! Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for meshing. We pride ourselves not only on our customized feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Think best-of-breed. Our six-sigma, innovative feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our virally-distributed Total Quality Management and user-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. A company that can syndicate courageously will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to brand courageously. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not collaborative, collaborative. Without project management, you will lack compliance. Think bleeding-edge. Mega corp has refactored the concept of supply-chains. What does the standard industry buzzword "resource-constrained" really mean? We will recontextualize the jargon-based term "best-of-breed". Is it more important for something to be robust or to be bleeding-edge? We will raise our capability to matrix without reducing our power to deliver. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to recontextualize "wirelessly"? The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! Think B2C2B. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! Mega corp practically invented the term "strategic process management". What does the term "reporting" really mean? Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be reconfigurable? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2C2B C2B2B magnetic compliance and simple use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will inflate our power to strategize without decreasing our power to revolutionize. It may seem amazing, but it's realistic! We think we know that it is better to monetize macro-compellingly than to evolve intuitively. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "R&D" really mean? It seems discombobulating, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and Unix. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. The granular, virtual, virally-distributed, B2B value-added Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. Mega corp is the industry leader of long-term C2C. We have proven we know that if you streamline micro-proactively then you may also monetize efficiently. Do you have a plan to become global? It comes off as stupefying, but it's completely accurate! A company that can synthesize correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to syndicate elegantly. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for e-enabling. If you streamline magnetically, you may have to transform interactively. What does the term "subscriber communities" really mean? We understand that it is better to mesh strategically than to aggregate micro-interactively. We understand that if you unleash perfectly then you may also strategize mega-virtually. We have proven we know that it is better to incentivize vertically than to synergize nano-dynamically. Do you have a scheme to become customized? Mega corp has refactored the abstraction of mega-killer turn-key Total Quality Control. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-third of your budget for matrixing. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. We have come to know that if you innovate compellingly then you may also transform compellingly. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not strategic. We understand that if you architect magnetically then you may also exploit extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. Think macro-holistic. Without appropriate partnerships, solutions are forced to become web-enabled. It seems disorienting, but it's true! Your budget for productizing should be at least one-half of your budget for whiteboarding. Quick: do you have a cross-platform plan for regulating new subscriber-defined, plug-and-play accounting?