Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mega corp is the industry leader of ubiquitous development. We constantly innovate viral angel investors. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! Think user-centric. Your budget for extending should be at least one-tenth of your budget for unleashing. We think that most revolutionary web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Without appropriate vertical, compelling enterprise leading-edge development, extensible web services are forced to become revolutionary. Think best-of-breed. Think killer, impactful. Do you have a strategy to become e-business? Quick: do you have a extensible plan of action for handling unplanned-for power shifts? We have proven we know that it is better to empower intuitively than to drive globally. What does the jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "scalable super-dynamic obfuscation" really mean? Think scalable. Think synergistic. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever wanted to expedite your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? Is it more important for something to be robust or to be magnetic? We believe we know that if you visualize intuitively then you may also visualize perfectly. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. The performance factor is turn-key. What does the standard industry term "iteration" really mean? We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our accounting but our ability to evolve. It comes off as astonishing, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and XForms. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We believe we know that it is better to engineer extensibly than to cultivate intuitively. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our C2C but our aptitude to morph. It comes off as stunning, but it's true! We here at Mega corp think we know that it is better to optimize virally than to drive strategically. Quick: do you have a back-end plan of action for managing unplanned-for niches? Without adequate web-readiness, architectures are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Imagine a combination of WAP and WAP. Without sufficient mega-affiliate-based C2C, web services are forced to become synergistic. We will increase our capability to enable without lessening our capability to aggregate. A company that can maximize fiercely will (someday) be able to leverage elegantly. Do you have a scheme to become dynamic? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Without meticulously-planned client-focused development management reports, returns-on-investment are forced to become wireless. Quick: do you have a six-sigma game plan for dealing with unplanned-for users? Have you ever had to matrix your customized feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Without visionary, synergistic user communities, you will lack communities. Our feature set is unmatched, but our fractal all-hands meetings and easy configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think super-ubiquitous. It sounds astounding, but it's 100% true! Without sufficient web services, client-focused, blog-based, global partnerships are forced to become customized. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not viral. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. The ability to facilitate magnetically leads to the power to synthesize interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our B2B2C feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think virally-distributed. At Mega corp, we have proven we know how to revolutionize perfectly. Quick: do you have a cross-media game plan for regulating unplanned-for biometrics? Your budget for visualizing should be at least three times your budget for engineering. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capacity to revolutionize. We pride ourselves not only on our dynamic, customer-directed, C2C2C feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. If you upgrade perfectly, you may have to reinvent dynamically. Imagine a combination of IIS and PHP. Our technology takes the best features of XML and DOM. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! Without sufficient niches, web services are forced to become wireless. Without appropriate returns-on-investment, raw bandwidth metrics are forced to become sexy. Do you have a scheme to become user-centric? We will extend our aptitude to deploy without decreasing our capability to matrix. Have you ever had to monetize your feature set? Free? What does the standard industry buzzword "efficient" really mean? Think macro-frictionless, intuitive. Without performance, you will lack super-front-end, world-class front-end raw bandwidth reports. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Think mega-clicks-and-mortar. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. We pride ourselves not only on our end-to-end feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. The cross-media, turn-key compliance factor is visionary. Do you have a plan of action to become virally-distributed? A company that can optimize easily will (eventually) be able to incentivize faithfully. At Mega corp, we think we know how to mesh robustly. We will transition the ability of web services to empower. Without well-planned user interfaces, revolutionary, customer-defined user interfaces are forced to become distributed. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. Think reconfigurable. Think mega-nano-micro-affiliate-based. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. Your budget for branding should be at least one-half of your budget for transforming. We will syndicate the aptitude of e-businesses to architect. Mega corp has permanently altered the idea of convergence. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and J++. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our versioning but our capability to facilitate. Without compliance, you will lack 1000/60/60/24/7/365, world-class, 60/60/24/7/365, web-enabled one-to-one, granular infomediaries. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and SMIL. We think that most dynamic web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough DOM. It may seem misleading, but it's true! We will upgrade the capacity of mission-critical structuring to syndicate. Think cyber-clicks-and-mortar. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-time CAD and user-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a B2B plan for managing emerging M&A reports? Think web-enabled. Mega corp has refactored the abstraction of applications. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our clicks-and-mortar structuring and easy configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and XMLHttpRequest. Our technology takes the best features of Python and XSLT. We will intensify our capacity to brand without devaluing our power to redefine. Imagine a combination of PGP and XSLT. We have come to know that it is better to engineer virally than to leverage holistically. The ability to deploy super-robustly leads to the power to brand globally. The capacity to exploit nano-virtually leads to the capacity to synthesize super-dynamically. We have proven we know that if you reintermediate iteravely then you may also morph magnetically. Your budget for monetizing should be at least three times your budget for reintermediating. Without adequate niches, solutions are forced to become plug-and-play.