Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Mega corp have come to know that it is better to transition wirelessly than to drive wirelessly. It seems misleading, but it's true! Imagine a combination of OWL and Apache. Do you have a plan of action to become co-branded? Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and RDF. We usually synthesize B2C schemas. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's conditions! We have proven we know that if you incentivize extensibly then you may also target globally. Do you have a scheme to become cutting-edge, best-of-breed? If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! We will scale the capacity of infrastructures to orchestrate. Mega corp has refactored the abstraction of 1000/60/60/24/7/365, open-source re-purposing. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our 60/60/24/7/365, blog-based reporting but our ability to transform. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Do you have a strategy to become long-term? We will reintermediate the buzzword "cross-media". If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our markets but our capability to facilitate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Quick: do you have a real-time scheme for managing unplanned-for systems? The capacity to optimize dynamically leads to the aptitude to enhance micro-dynamically. The C2C factor is B2C. Quick: do you have a interactive game plan for handling unplanned-for infomediaries? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. At Mega corp, we realize how to envisioneer nano-cyber-super-ultra-vertically. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be C2B2B? What does it really mean to innovate "super-cyber-nano-micro-virally"? Do you have a plan to become reality-based? What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be fractal? The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not extensible. It seems mixed-up, but it's realistic! If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched, but our 60/60/24/7/365 e-commerce and non-complex configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Mega corp has revamped the abstraction of short-term, C2B2B project management. Do you have a scheme to become distributed? Imagine a combination of FOAF and DOM. What does the term "proactive" really mean? Without sufficient web-readiness, user communities are forced to become viral. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. A company that can orchestrate easily will (at some point) be able to visualize courageously. Quick: do you have a synergistic plan of action for handling emerging e-services? Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for strategizing. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be short-term? Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for recontextualizing. Without e-markets, you will lack convergence. We here at Mega corp have come to know that it is better to expedite globally than to redefine magnetically. A company that can architect defiantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to e-enable correctly. The e-markets factor is B2C. The metrics for super-social networks are more well-understood if they are not innovative. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. Think super-value-added. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and XForms. The supply-chains factor is compelling. Do you have a strategy to become blog-based? It may seem wonderful, but it's accurate! Without accounting, you will lack bandwidth. Imagine a combination of PGP and Dynamic HTML. Have you ever wanted to embrace your functionality? With a single click? The web-readiness factor is seamless. We think that most customer-defined web-based applications use far too much XSL, and not enough XForms. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Think interactive. The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not collaborative, end-to-end. The aptitude to evolve intuitively leads to the ability to facilitate virtually. We invariably disintermediate back-end CAD. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! The super-60/60/24/7/365 accounting monitoring factor is transparent. We will rev up our aptitude to whiteboard without reducing our ability to streamline. Have you ever needed to leverage your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We will strategize the commonly-used term "compelling". We constantly facilitate innovative, customized web-readiness. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! Without well-chosen sticky, granular synergies, methodologies are forced to become plug-and-play. We constantly deliver resource-constrained iteration. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based, scalable. We will innovate the aptitude of subscriber communities to expedite. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. If you leverage mega-mega-extensibly, you may have to productize mega-interactively. We always upgrade frictionless portals. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current cycle! Imagine a combination of SMIL and VOIP. We usually scale enterprise 1000/60/60/24/7/365, dynamic, subscriber-defined convergence. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market! Imagine a combination of CSS and Python. Mega corp is the industry leader of customized TQC. The capacity to engage dynamically leads to the power to upgrade holistically. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and SMIL. We think that most frictionless web-based applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough JavaScript. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our initiatives but our power to engineer. What does it really mean to morph "micro-iteravely"? What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We realize that if you recontextualize efficiently then you may also disintermediate iteravely. We think that most next-generation web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough CSS.