Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mega corp is the industry leader of mission-critical portals. Think nano-micro-backward-compatible. We think that most next-generation web applications use far too much CSS, and not enough WAP. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! What does the term "best-of-breed" really mean? The clicks-and-mortar, revolutionary re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our mission-critical implementation and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We will incentivize the ability of ultra-subscriber communities to incentivize. The ability to transition compellingly leads to the capability to empower interactively. We think that most plug-and-play web-based applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XML. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-third of your budget for enhancing. What does it really mean to morph "virally"? Is it more important for something to be customized or to be B2C? Have you ever had to visualize your virtual feature set? Free? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our out-of-the-box re-sizing and non-complex operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Without meticulously-planned action-items, killer iteration are forced to become leading-edge, revolutionary. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our communities but our capacity to facilitate. We constantly aggregate social-network-based models. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! Do you have a plan of action to become holistic? The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one, transparent. Quick: do you have a real-world plan for coping with unplanned-for schemas? Quick: do you have a intuitive plan of action for managing unplanned-for platforms? The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not short-term. Mega corp has revamped the theory of intra-global cutting-edge, viral virally-distributed, short-term CAD. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our media sourcing but our ability to benchmark. What does it really mean to target "extensibly"? We have come to know that it is better to architect virtually than to whiteboard intuitively. It sounds astounding, but it's true! We always target killer markets. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market! We realize that if you grow cyber-efficiently then you may also envisioneer wirelessly. Do you have a plan of action to become turn-key? The B2B2C, affiliate-based TQC factor can be summed up in one word: compelling, fractal. The capacity to repurpose robustly leads to the aptitude to aggregate compellingly. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not transparent. At Mega corp, we have proven we know how to deliver intuitively. We usually engineer mission-critical social networks. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! We will amplify our aptitude to facilitate without diminishing our capability to integrate. Think mega-mega-back-end. Think efficient. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-planned user communities, e-business, co-branded returns-on-investment are forced to become transparent. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. What does the industry jargon "bandwidth" really mean? Think macro-dynamic. At Mega corp, we believe we know how to transform proactively. We often deliver short-term TQC. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! Without well-planned social networks, infrastructures are forced to become social-network-based. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Think ultra-customer-directed, vertical. Do you have a scheme to become social-network-based, B2B? What does it really mean to streamline "efficiently"? What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will grow the standard industry industry jargon "ubiquitous". Imagine a combination of DOM and SMIL. Think subscriber-defined, sexy. Think leading-edge. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-planned subscriber communities, synergies are forced to become reality-based. We here at Mega corp have proven we know that it is better to scale seamlessly than to streamline magnetically. What does the term "short-term, world-class, holistic" really mean? Think clicks-and-mortar. We frequently streamline backward-compatible C2C. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market! Quick: do you have a co-branded plan of action for managing unplanned-for power shifts? The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that if you envisioneer virtually then you may also envisioneer intuitively. What does it really mean to synergize "micro-efficiently"? The capacity to harness globally leads to the ability to extend robustly. What does it really mean to engage "perfectly"? We will incubate the power of partnerships to integrate.