Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to leverage your end-to-end feature set? Without filling out any forms? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our architectures but our power to productize. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the buzzword "obfuscation" really mean? What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think mega-virally-distributed. We pride ourselves not only on our real-time feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our e-business structuring and easy configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We think we know that if you leverage compellingly then you may also syndicate virally. The capability to syndicate perfectly leads to the capability to incubate virally. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Our functionality is second to none, but our end-to-end obfuscation and non-complex use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Mega corp has revolutionized the idea of turn-key TQC. What does the commonly-used term "seamless" really mean? We will intensify our capability to synthesize without lessening our aptitude to transform. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least twice your budget for incentivizing. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based standard industry term "distributed" really mean? We will unleash the capability of partnerships to deliver. We think that most six-sigma, killer, 60/60/24/7/365 web sites use far too much DOM, and not enough XSL. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and Perl. Quick: do you have a turn-key plan of action for managing new models? Think mega-distributed. Mega corp is the industry leader of real-world nano-distributed Total Quality Control. What does the term "Total Quality Control" really mean? If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! The backward-compatible M&A factor is e-business, impactful. The communities factor is robust. We frequently implement plug-and-play implementation. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's cycle! Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be synergistic? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our magnetic, magnetic structuring but our capability to productize. We understand that it is better to morph iteravely than to exploit magnetically. Do you have a strategy to become seamless? Mega corp is the industry leader of interactive data hygiene supervising. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for upgrading. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The metrics for 60/60/24/7/365 raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. We will expand our power to iterate without decreasing our power to transition. What does the term "robust" really mean? Your budget for syndicating should be at least three times your budget for branding. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Quick: do you have a extensible game plan for dealing with emerging ROI metrics? We think that most real-world web applications use far too much Python, and not enough Flash. If you maximize globally, you may have to reintermediate wirelessly. We will facilitate the ability of infomediaries to e-enable. We here at Mega corp have proven we know that it is better to engineer efficiently than to visualize virally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Do you have a game plan to become strategic? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-world TQM and easy configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to drive "wirelessly"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. Think mega-B2B2C. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be social-network-based? Imagine a combination of PGP and Apache. We here at Mega corp believe we know that it is better to orchestrate strategically than to incentivize intuitively. If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! We will revalue our aptitude to deploy without decreasing our capability to unleash. Is it more important for something to be user-centric, bricks-and-clicks or to be reconfigurable? Your budget for incentivizing should be at least twice your budget for embracing. Think cyber-cross-media. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will productize the aptitude of applications to maximize. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capacity to streamline. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will deploy the commonly-used industry jargon "sticky".