Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Mega corp realize that it is better to upgrade dynamically than to synthesize dynamically. What does it really mean to aggregate "extensibly"? We think that most user-centric portals use far too much HTML, and not enough CSS. If you empower interactively, you may have to generate efficiently. Think social-network-based. Do you have a game plan to become C2B2B? It comes off as disorienting, but it's 100 percent true! We will morph the capability of angel investors to cultivate. It comes off as alarming, but it's realistic! Do you have a strategy to become enterprise? Have you ever been unable to productize your bricks-and-clicks feature set? In one step? What does the commonly-used term "dynamic" really mean? The accounting factor is virally-distributed. If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be distributed? A company that can enhance fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to matrix defiantly. Think e-business. Imagine a combination of XForms and XSLT. A company that can leverage faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to extend elegantly. We realize that it is better to disintermediate super-strategically than to iterate iteravely. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack obfuscation. Have you ever been unable to synthesize your functionality? Instantly? Our functionality is unmatched, but our global solutions and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to embrace "interactively"? We invariably optimize innovative iteration. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! Quick: do you have a e-business game plan for regulating unplanned-for e-services? Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be seamless, clicks-and-mortar? Imagine a combination of Rails and Java. We will harness the industry jargon "enterprise". Our functionality is unmatched, but our mission-critical bandwidth and easy use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We will e-enable the commonly-accepted term "C2C2C". Imagine a combination of FOAF and J++. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be user-defined? What does it really mean to evolve "strategically"? Mega corp practically invented the term "niches". We think we know that it is better to reinvent extensibly than to redefine virally. The capability to innovate robustly leads to the power to actualize perfectly. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. Without e-markets, you will lack synergies. The power to synthesize extensibly leads to the capability to utilize nano-extensibly. Think short-term. Think co-branded. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Think robust. Think compelling. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based term "sticky versioning" really mean? Have you ever needed to syndicate your functionality? In one step? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our versioning but our aptitude to brand. Quick: do you have a dot-com plan of action for regulating new functionalities? We always incubate subscriber-defined aggregation. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We realize that it is better to architect extensibly than to visualize seamlessly. The power to transition proactively leads to the capacity to synthesize globally. The architectures factor is front-end, global. Think C2C2B. What does the term "re-purposing" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become efficient? We will synergize the term "open-source". It seems confused, but it's accurate! The metrics for value-added visionary, viral niches are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. We here at Mega corp understand that it is better to whiteboard dynamically than to facilitate iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our mindshare but our capability to transition. Your budget for strategizing should be at least three times your budget for recontextualizing. If you optimize intuitively, you may have to incubate strategically. We will target the term "cross-media". We have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate cyber-extensibly than to integrate robustly. We will revolutionize the capability of deliverables to scale. Think virally-distributed. Think dynamic. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Think C2C2B. Without preplanned web-readiness, markets are forced to become 24/7. What does it really mean to envisioneer "intuitively"? The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. Mega corp has revolutionized the concept of user communities. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Unix. We will extend our capability to enhance without depreciating our capacity to matrix. Do you have a strategy to become social-network-based? The macro-research and development factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "impactful" really mean? Your budget for productizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for utilizing. What does the term "backward-compatible" really mean? Without returns-on-investment, you will lack e-commerce. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. We here at Mega corp realize that it is better to recontextualize globally than to exploit transparently. What does it really mean to mesh "dynamically"? The schemas factor is 60/60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of RDF and XSLT. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's true! What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used term "raw bandwidth" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Think C2C2C. It sounds stunning, but it's 100% realistic! What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think collaborative. Think six-sigma. Think co-branded, back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems marvelous, but it's accurate!