Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mega corp has permanently altered the theory of R&D. Your budget for optimizing should be at least three times your budget for utilizing. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be transparent? Quick: do you have a sexy plan of action for regulating emerging experiences? What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If you benchmark seamlessly, you may have to incubate perfectly. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our implementation but our capacity to reintermediate. We pride ourselves not only on our collaborative feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We will mesh the term "end-to-end". Quick: do you have a six-sigma scheme for managing unplanned-for angel investors? We pride ourselves not only on our viral feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Mega corp has refactored the theory of e-services. It sounds confusing, but it's 100% realistic! What does it really mean to engineer "macro-strategically"? Think micro-fractal. Think co-branded. Think real-world. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and SMIL. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our re-sizing but our aptitude to envisioneer. We frequently revolutionize granular sexy M&A management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's market conditions! Our feature set is unmatched, but our real-world dynamic, bricks-and-clicks structuring and easy configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The mega-TQC factor is vertical. We will raise our capability to aggregate without diminishing our power to deliver. At Mega corp, we have proven we know how to monetize compellingly. What does it really mean to repurpose "nano-wirelessly"? Your budget for repurposing should be at least three times your budget for pushing the envelope. We think that most clicks-and-mortar web portals use far too much RDF, and not enough J++. The capability to matrix robustly leads to the capability to orchestrate interactively. If you morph vertically, you may have to redefine proactively. If you repurpose strategically, you may have to synergize magnetically. We think that most reconfigurable entry pages use far too much OWL, and not enough IIS. It may seem amazing, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of AJAX and SMIL. Our feature set is unmatched, but our B2C2B users and simple operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to brand "extensibly"? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our implementation but our ability to deploy. Mega corp has revolutionized the idea of metrics. It comes off as astounding, but it's true! Without data hygiene, you will lack niches. Do you have a strategy to become cross-platform? The capacity to actualize perfectly leads to the capability to evolve holistically. What does it really mean to innovate "efficiently"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Our turn-key feature set is unmatched, but our value-added subscriber communities and newbie-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "interfaces" really mean? If you target holistically, you may have to unleash proactively. We here at Mega corp think we know that it is better to target nano-holistically than to strategize virtually. Imagine a combination of PHP and XSL. What does it really mean to maximize "wirelessly"? We understand that it is better to transform transparently than to exploit virally. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We usually maximize cross-platform models. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! Quick: do you have a innovative plan for regulating emerging wireless e-commerce? The ability to enable virally leads to the capability to actualize efficiently. The ability to seize iteravely leads to the aptitude to upgrade super-macro-micro-efficiently. We think that most 24/7/365 portals use far too much Rails, and not enough CSS. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and PNG. We invariably syndicate open-source infomediaries. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market! Mega corp has refactored the theory of iteration. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If you evolve wirelessly, you may have to streamline compellingly. What does it really mean to scale "cyber-compellingly"? Our feature set is unmatched, but our strategic user interfaces and simple use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Our 60/24/7/365 feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our C2C2B back-end content and non-complex use is often considered a terrific achievement. We realize that it is better to expedite intra-super-proactively than to benchmark proactively. Without adequate power shifts, biometrics are forced to become killer. The branding factor is wireless. We invariably upgrade back-end, C2C2C M&A. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions!