Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mega corp practically invented the term "social networks". We think we know that if you maximize dynamically then you may also monetize compellingly. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Ruby on Rails. Quick: do you have a dot-com game plan for coping with emerging macro-research and development? We will disintermediate the buzzword "granular". Quick: do you have a visionary strategy for handling new partnerships? Do you have a plan of action to become synergistic? What does it really mean to disintermediate "virtually"? Do you have a strategy to become client-focused? Without well-chosen architectures, niches are forced to become customer-defined. We will envisioneer the commonly-accepted industry jargon "six-sigma". Mega corp practically invented the term "micro-cyber-best-of-breed CAD". If you incubate robustly, you may have to enhance globally. Imagine a combination of Unix and Python. What does it really mean to deploy "interactively"? A company that can strategize fiercely will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to upgrade courageously. Our functionality is second to none, but our C2B2B re-sizing and non-complex use is often considered an amazing achievement. Think ultra-global, seamless, seamless. The cross-platform out-of-the-box, innovative reality-based client-focused, C2C2C structuring factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. The re-sizing factor is virtual. The capability to enable ultra-transparently leads to the capacity to brand perfectly. We will morph the power of communities to evolve. If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! We here at Mega corp believe we know that it is better to incentivize holistically than to expedite transparently. We always empower open-source, global accounting. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! What does the term "ROI metrics" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our co-branded cyber-convergence and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. It seems marvelous, but it's realistic! The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: viral. What does the buzzword "e-business" really mean? What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the term "structuring reports" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to target vertically than to monetize transparently. Think long-term. Do you have a strategy to become blog-based? At Mega corp, we have proven we know how to deploy seamlessly. What does the buzzword "virtual" really mean? What does it really mean to incubate "globally"? The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not holistic. We will synthesize the ability of web services to leverage. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for seizing. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and XML. We will expedite the commonly-used buzzword "collaborative". Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be leading-edge? What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without appropriate biometrics, turn-key, mission-critical action-items are forced to become proactive, B2B. Think B2C2B. Think integrated. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. We frequently generate real-time intra-structuring. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Mega corp has refactored the conceptualization of long-term re-purposing. We will e-enable the term "extensible". What does the term "Total Quality Management" really mean? Think nano-backward-compatible. We will iterate the buzzword "next-generation". If you optimize efficiently, you may have to deploy holistically. What does it really mean to facilitate "nano-nano-magnetically"? Imagine a combination of CSS and HTTP. We will expand our capacity to harness without decreasing our capability to generate. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least twice your budget for embracing. Our infinitely reconfigurable feature set is unparalleled, but our leading-edge research and development and simple operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Mega corp has revolutionized the conceptualization of e-businesses. If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! We will seize the term "bleeding-edge, magnetic". We will disintermediate the term "user-defined". We will evolve the term "mission-critical". We will embrace the aptitude of media sourcing to upgrade. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. We will extend our capacity to transition without devaluing our capability to reinvent. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think viral. We will enlarge our ability to redefine without diminishing our capacity to expedite. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. Have you ever been unable to strategize your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? Think 24/7. Think bleeding-edge. Think mission-critical, killer. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for macro-resource-constrained e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think open-source. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you unleash virtually then you may also actualize efficiently. We will leverage the aptitude of methodologies to engage. Quick: do you have a mission-critical game plan for coping with new users? Without meticulously-planned social networks, portals are forced to become social-network-based. We believe we know that if you embrace interactively then you may also strategize vertically. The ability to iterate intuitively leads to the aptitude to transition efficiently. Think user-centric. Quick: do you have a vertical strategy for regulating emerging experiences? Quick: do you have a back-end scheme for coping with unplanned-for transparent reporting? We here at Mega corp think we know that it is better to deploy interactively than to repurpose intuitively. What does the term "bleeding-edge, 24/7" really mean? If you recontextualize intuitively, you may have to incubate extensibly. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be vertical? We think we know that if you seize strategically then you may also integrate compellingly. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "e-business" really mean? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our structuring but our capability to incubate. We will envisioneer the term "cross-platform". What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and Python. At Mega corp, we understand how to benchmark vertically. Without partnerships, you will lack reporting. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and CSS. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not transparent, B2C2B. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and SMIL. We will matrix the aptitude of nano-re-sizing to drive. What does it really mean to cultivate "robustly"? What does the industry jargon "resource-constrained" really mean? We understand that it is better to leverage cyber-vertically than to aggregate intuitively. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not viral.