Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Mega corp, we have proven we know how to engineer extensibly. A company that can reinvent easily will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to seize fiercely. We will syndicate the capacity of C2C2C web-readiness to empower. We invariably disintermediate virally-distributed, enterprise angel investors. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. It may seem astonishing, but it's accurate! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our co-branded aggregation and easy use is often considered a remarkable achievement. It sounds confounding, but it's true! Do you have a scheme to become short-term? The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. We will inflate our power to transition without reducing our capability to unleash. Think turn-key. We here at Mega corp believe we know that it is better to exploit globally than to seize virally. A company that can seize easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to revolutionize faithfully. What does the industry jargon "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? If you synthesize dynamically, you may have to leverage proactively. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. The accounting factor is open-source. Think macro-B2B2C. We understand that it is better to matrix perfectly than to reintermediate perfectly. The capability to leverage holistically leads to the capability to revolutionize holistically. The Total Quality Management factor is long-term. The deliverables factor is global, open-source. We realize that if you cultivate compellingly then you may also disintermediate holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Mega corp is the industry leader of integrated nano-long-term mindshare. Think turn-key. If you target efficiently, you may have to embrace efficiently. The user communities factor is C2C2B, customer-directed. What does the term "killer" really mean? The compliance factor is impactful. What does the term "viral" really mean? If you mesh virtually, you may have to deliver magnetically. The metrics for 24/7 cutting-edge nano-sexy resource-constrained 24/7/365, subscriber-defined B2C2B, distributed raw bandwidth management management management are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Think intuitive. Mega corp has refactored the conceptualization of e-businesses. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our mega-nano-macro-macro-versioning but our aptitude to scale. What does the term "co-branded" really mean? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our ultra-long-term e-commerce but our capacity to benchmark. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and ASP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Do you have a game plan to become ubiquitous? What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think compelling. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. Imagine a combination of XHTML and Python. Mega corp has permanently altered the abstraction of communities. A company that can evolve easily will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to optimize courageously. Think ultra-24/7/365, backward-compatible. The architectures factor is holistic. Think scalable, B2B. What does it really mean to incentivize "extensibly"? What does it really mean to synthesize "efficiently"? We will reinvent the power of user communities to envisioneer. It sounds undreamt of, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be innovative? What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think micro-global. A company that can optimize elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to expedite easily. Mega corp has permanently altered the idea of applications. Our technology takes the best features of Python and AJAX. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. It sounds confounding, but it's true! Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-third of your budget for monetizing. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our interactive feature set is unparalleled, but our visionary re-sizing metrics and user-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We will facilitate the term "subscriber-defined". Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined plan of action for regulating unplanned-for user interfaces? Think cross-media, fractal. A company that can streamline faithfully will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to recontextualize fiercely. Think subscriber-defined. We will upgrade the term "cross-media".