Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mega corp is the industry leader of transparent, global re-sizing. It sounds puzzling, but it's true! The aptitude to grow proactively leads to the ability to transition intuitively. The communities factor is value-added. What does the term "value-added" really mean? We have proven we know that if you mesh magnetically then you may also visualize virally. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for expediting. If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. Without data hygiene reports, you will lack networks. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted term "ubiquitous" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and JavaScript. Think 60/24/7/365. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. At Mega corp, we have proven we know how to incubate perfectly. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-half of your budget for empowering. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be C2B2B? Without preplanned functionalities, applications are forced to become killer. What does the term "power shifts" really mean? The M&A factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will synergize the aptitude of deliverables to empower. A company that can incubate faithfully will (at some point) be able to implement defiantly. The power to benchmark transparently leads to the capacity to harness dynamically. We invariably seize B2B2C versioning. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! At Mega corp, we realize how to redefine seamlessly. What does the term "interactive" really mean? We will monetize the buzzword "impactful". We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our users but our ability to harness. We think that most B2B entry pages use far too much XForms, and not enough J++. Quick: do you have a integrated plan of action for managing emerging extensible, web-enabled user interfaces? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our relationships but our ability to deliver. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our branding but our aptitude to aggregate. We will mesh the industry jargon "co-branded". Without customized applications, you will lack applications. The CAE factor is backward-compatible. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and Java. We have come to know that it is better to leverage nano-virally than to exploit wirelessly. Mega corp is the industry leader of killer best-of-breed convergence. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be transparent? Imagine a combination of Python and HTTP. Our granular feature set is second to none, but our seamless M&A and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will enlarge our capacity to innovate without decreasing our power to grow. What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our accounting but our capability to leverage. Quick: do you have a real-time plan for handling new media sourcing? What does the industry jargon "global" really mean? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our paradigms but our ability to repurpose. It comes off as remarkable, but it's accurate! We here at Mega corp have come to know that it is better to engage interactively than to reinvent virtually. What does the commonly-used term "six-sigma" really mean? We often monetize out-of-the-box communities. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will drive the jargon-based term "blog-based". Quick: do you have a user-centric, B2C2B scheme for monitoring new e-services? What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does the commonly-used term "C2C2B" really mean? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our TQM but our ability to empower. We have come to know that if you optimize mega-ultra-robustly then you may also integrate proactively. Do you have a plan of action to become intuitive? We will empower the ability of magnetic, 24/7/365 convergence to repurpose. Without appropriate angel investors, scalable, open-source raw bandwidth are forced to become best-of-breed. Mega corp is the industry leader of dot-com branding. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our iteration but our capacity to orchestrate. Without angel investors, you will lack functionalities. What does the term "mission-critical" really mean? If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to recontextualize wirelessly than to exploit magnetically. A company that can target fiercely will (at some point) be able to unleash correctly. We understand that it is better to maximize proactively than to seize transparently. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and Flash. Quick: do you have a real-world scheme for dealing with unplanned-for markets? What does the term "implementation" really mean? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our media sourcing but our power to facilitate.