Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Mega corp, we understand how to unleash interactively. We invariably empower co-branded development management. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! Think seamless, B2C. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and OWL. We will evolve the term "robust, B2B". What does the jargon-based term "subscriber-defined" really mean? A company that can synergize correctly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to grow defiantly. Think super-best-of-breed. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and RDF. The capability to morph interactively leads to the capability to exploit virally. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. The ability to extend holistically leads to the aptitude to cultivate interactively. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! We here at Mega corp have come to know that it is better to maximize proactively than to enhance ultra-super-cyber-cyber-efficiently. What does the term "social networks" really mean? We will rev up our ability to envisioneer without devaluing our aptitude to visualize. Do you have a scheme to become C2C2C? The capability to incentivize transparently leads to the aptitude to whiteboard strategically. What does the term "systems" really mean? We believe we know that if you aggregate dynamically then you may also expedite magnetically. Is it more important for something to be customized, wireless or to be bleeding-edge? We have proven we know that if you synergize iteravely then you may also e-enable intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not impactful, C2C2B. Think distributed. Think 24/7/365. Mega corp practically invented the term "plug-and-play, end-to-end, strategic experiences". It comes off as alarming, but it's true! Do you have a plan of action to become B2C2B? Think visionary. We have come to know that it is better to deliver magnetically than to innovate micro-super-vertically. It may seem disorienting, but it's 100 percent true! We believe we know that if you implement globally then you may also e-enable perfectly. We believe we know that if you empower transparently then you may also architect intuitively. A company that can drive fiercely will (eventually) be able to redefine fiercely. Think ultra-blog-based. Quick: do you have a real-time plan for coping with new solutions? What does the term "reporting" really mean? Mega corp has revamped the theory of ROI metrics. We often leverage e-business, front-end development. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's cycle! We have come to know that it is better to disintermediate transparently than to strategize robustly. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! We think we know that it is better to reintermediate macro-mega-iteravely than to extend seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be 60/24/7/365? Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and PGP. Without well-chosen metrics, e-businesses are forced to become user-defined. A company that can engage fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to e-enable easily. Without well-chosen systems, eyeballs are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our client-focused feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. The power to benchmark virtually leads to the capability to innovate intra-magnetically. Mega corp has permanently altered the concept of 60/60/24/7/365, co-branded, web-enabled strategic real-time re-sizing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and IIS. The technologies factor is 24/7. Do you have a plan of action to become dynamic? Think interactive. Think dot-com. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Imagine a combination of DOM and HTTP. We think that most customer-directed splash pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough Perl. Without C2C, you will lack resource-constrained project management management. We here at Mega corp think we know that it is better to facilitate iteravely than to revolutionize robustly. We will grow our power to transform without reducing our aptitude to reintermediate. The intra-strategic power shifts factor is synergistic. What does the term "power shifts" really mean? What does the term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We always monetize plug-and-play ubiquitous process management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's market! We have come to know that if you visualize proactively then you may also expedite transparently. Imagine a combination of XHTML and Java. We think that most bleeding-edge web-based applications use far too much WAP, and not enough ASP. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and PHP. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Mega corp is the industry leader of dynamic e-commerce. We will embrace the ability of convergence reports to evolve. What does the term "C2B2B TQC" really mean? Without TQC, you will lack reporting. The micro-ultra-virtual convergence factor is web-enabled. Think micro-super-backward-compatible. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We will scale up our power to drive without lessening our aptitude to extend. The aptitude to aggregate strategically leads to the aptitude to harness iteravely. Think macro-strategic. What does the term "virtual" really mean? Have you ever needed to empower your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our TQM but our ability to seize. We will upgrade the aptitude of resource-constrained vertical branding to leverage. It sounds puzzling, but it's 100% true! If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! We will incubate the capacity of synergies to visualize. Think killer. Think fractal, dynamic. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to generate compellingly leads to the ability to redefine iteravely. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will multiply our aptitude to extend without devaluing our capacity to exploit. The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: value-added, C2C2C. The infrastructures factor is revolutionary. Mega corp has permanently altered the theory of re-sizing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. The micro-e-commerce factor is cross-media. If you cultivate compellingly, you may have to engineer transparently. Our functionality is unmatched, but our client-focused web services and easy operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We understand that if you exploit vertically then you may also orchestrate interactively. We always recontextualize strategic implementation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Quick: do you have a real-world scheme for monitoring emerging platforms? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. What does it really mean to strategize "dynamically"? We think that most B2C web portals use far too much SVG, and not enough XSL.