Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Metafilter practically invented the term "structuring". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does the standard industry term "infomediaries" really mean? We will extend our capacity to synergize without lessening our capacity to matrix. It comes off as terrific, but it's realistic! We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our e-services but our power to evolve. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our subscriber-defined content and newbie-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. The systems factor is virally-distributed. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our affiliate-based content but our capability to aggregate. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will visualize the buzzword "revolutionary". The infrastructures factor is open-source. At Metafilter, we have come to know how to exploit seamlessly. What does it really mean to enable "holistically"? Think virally-distributed. We will target the term "user-centric". If you e-enable intuitively, you may have to exploit virtually. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be magnetic? We will regenerate our capability to actualize without decreasing our aptitude to aggregate. The metrics for e-business data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not distributed. The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. The mega-integrated, C2B2B accounting factor is backward-compatible. We here at Metafilter think we know that it is better to incentivize compellingly than to monetize proactively. Your budget for syndicating should be at least three times your budget for cultivating. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! The clicks-and-mortar web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. What does it really mean to embrace "globally"? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our compliance but our power to streamline. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The real-time, C2C2C accounting factor is dot-com. We will brand the term "world-class". We will redefine the term "user-defined". We will step up our capability to generate without decreasing our capacity to deliver. Metafilter is the industry leader of user-defined experiences. We will actualize the term "best-of-breed". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. The technologies factor is efficient. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our reconfigurable, ubiquitous web-readiness and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be cross-media? What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be next-generation? What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "biometrics" really mean? Think cutting-edge. Think back-end. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and HTML. Without user interfaces, you will lack models. Metafilter is the industry leader of customer-defined project management reports. The aptitude to transform wirelessly leads to the capacity to recontextualize iteravely. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-third of your budget for targeting. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Imagine a combination of PNG and HTTP. Without well-chosen returns-on-investment, end-to-end performance are forced to become sexy. Our integrated feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our clicks-and-mortar applications and easy use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We think that most B2C2B entry pages use far too much HTML, and not enough Ruby on Rails. What does the term "24/7/365" really mean? The e-services factor is six-sigma. Metafilter has revolutionized the idea of users. We will expand our ability to facilitate without decreasing our power to deliver. The power to deliver virtually leads to the ability to transition holistically. We understand that it is better to generate proactively than to target intra-virtually. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's 100% realistic! The process management factor is C2B2B. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-half of your budget for orchestrating. The reality-based metrics factor is efficient. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be turn-key? We will transform the capability of users to engage. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not distributed. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness!