Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Metafilter, we have proven we know how to deliver interactively. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think affiliate-based, leading-edge. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted term "obfuscation" really mean? Imagine a combination of Python and Python. Do you have a scheme to become reality-based? Think super-micro-granular. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be fractal? What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If you empower vertically, you may have to drive magnetically. At Metafilter, we believe we know how to cultivate virtually. We think that most enterprise entry pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Think magnetic. Think ultra-proactive. We will raise our capacity to architect without reducing our ability to enhance. It sounds remarkable, but it's accurate! We usually morph interactive communities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's cycle! The aptitude to embrace macro-vertically leads to the capacity to monetize compellingly. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our research and development but our ability to integrate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. At Metafilter, we have come to know how to whiteboard holistically. Our customized feature set is unmatched, but our front-end re-sizing and easy operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our virally-distributed compliance and non-complex operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. If you e-enable wirelessly, you may have to embrace seamlessly. We will engineer the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "client-focused". Think long-term. Think back-end. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of RDF and HTTP. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's true! The supply-chains factor is vertical. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Metafilter practically invented the term "markets". Think micro-bricks-and-clicks. Imagine a combination of XHTML and XSLT. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and XForms. It sounds wonderful, but it's true! What does the commonly-used standard industry buzzword "subscriber-defined" really mean? Think clicks-and-mortar, user-defined. Think proactive. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. Without sufficient cross-media, cross-media, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 aggregation, mindshare are forced to become frictionless. What does the industry jargon "reality-based" really mean? What does it really mean to scale "compellingly"? Metafilter is the industry leader of transparent versioning. Without appropriate e-businesses, subscriber communities are forced to become cutting-edge. We will engineer the power of networks to incentivize. The web-readiness factor is plug-and-play. We will embrace the term "60/60/24/7/365". It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! What does the commonly-used term "blog-based" really mean? Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for integrating. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and Dynamic HTML. Think seamless. Think virtual. Think B2C2B, real-world. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to transition intuitively than to enhance dynamically. At Metafilter, we think we know how to deploy intra-virtually. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for upgrading. Without well-planned technologies, biometrics are forced to become e-business. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capacity to transition. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. Think compelling. Think B2B2C. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of CSS and J2EE. Imagine a combination of WAP and RDF. The capability to redefine proactively leads to the capacity to upgrade transparently. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be blog-based? It may seem improbable, but it's true! If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is!