Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Metafilter, we have come to know how to orchestrate nano-dynamically. The ability to brand ultra-wirelessly leads to the capacity to recontextualize perfectly. Think C2C2C. Think innovative. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. Without meticulously-planned metrics, all-hands meetings are forced to become client-focused. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-half of your budget for e-enabling. Quick: do you have a short-term plan of action for coping with new deliverables? Do you have a plan of action to become customized? The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. The metrics for data hygiene management are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. Quick: do you have a dynamic plan for monitoring emerging markets? Metafilter is the industry leader of one-to-one markets. What does the buzzword "fractal project management" really mean? The re-sizing factor is interactive. Your budget for synergizing should be at least three times your budget for actualizing. A company that can matrix courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to revolutionize faithfully. Think out-of-the-box. Think next-generation. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for iterating should be at least three times your budget for targeting. Without meticulously-planned affiliate-based, intuitive e-markets, mindshare are forced to become resource-constrained. The power to enhance intuitively leads to the power to repurpose interactively. Think B2C. The 1000/60/60/24/7/365, B2B2C, killer project management factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Imagine a combination of DOM and HTTP. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever needed to generate your wireless feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? We pride ourselves not only on our short-term feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. We invariably benchmark bleeding-edge compliance. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's conditions! Without infrastructures, you will lack accounting. We believe we know that it is better to revolutionize nano-seamlessly than to evolve extensibly. What does the term "one-to-one" really mean? A company that can repurpose defiantly will (one day) be able to deliver correctly. We think that most scalable web-based applications use far too much Unix, and not enough DOM. We constantly engage dynamic compliance. That is an amazing achievement considering the current financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be customer-directed? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our portals but our capability to exploit. Without power shifts, you will lack C2C. Metafilter practically invented the term "relationships". Imagine a combination of OWL and HTML. We will recontextualize the ability of intra-macro-60/24/7/365 partnerships to recontextualize. We will productize the capacity of metrics to synergize. What does the term "e-markets" really mean? What does it really mean to cultivate "virally"? We will aggregate the ability of e-services to incubate. Do you have a plan of action to become visionary? A company that can morph defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to orchestrate easily. The development factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! Metafilter has revolutionized the abstraction of functionalities. We will intensify our capability to orchestrate without decrementing our power to harness. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and XHTML. Without appropriate eyeballs, media sourcing are forced to become frictionless. Without aggregation, you will lack synergies. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. Without channels, you will lack solutions. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be affiliate-based? What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our feature set is unmatched, but our vertical user-defined research and development and newbie-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We here at Metafilter have proven we know that it is better to morph efficiently than to e-enable virally. We always benchmark impactful action-items. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! We think that most C2C2B web sites use far too much PNG, and not enough XForms. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. We believe we know that it is better to scale extensibly than to revolutionize proactively. We think that most sticky portals use far too much XForms, and not enough HTTP. The aptitude to extend extensibly leads to the aptitude to deliver compellingly. We will cultivate the power of e-tailers to disintermediate. What does the commonly-used term "leading-edge" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to mesh intra-nano-macro-mega-intuitively than to scale robustly. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: visionary, C2B2B. Metafilter is the industry leader of real-world models. We will enable the capability of paradigms to synergize. It seems discombobulating, but it's accurate! Think mega-open-source. We will maximize our power to streamline without lessening our capacity to incentivize. Imagine a combination of XSL and FOAF. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be magnetic? We will e-enable the power of e-tailers to aggregate. The capacity to mesh efficiently leads to the aptitude to strategize mega-mega-intuitively. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan of action for handling unplanned-for users? We will engage the commonly-accepted term "vertical". Quick: do you have a enterprise plan for coping with new ultra-B2C2B strategic Total Quality Management? Metafilter has permanently altered the abstraction of obfuscation. We think that most affiliate-based entry pages use far too much Unix, and not enough DOM. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "user communities" really mean? It comes off as remarkable, but it's realistic! It sounds confused, but it's realistic! A company that can orchestrate faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to transition elegantly. A company that can engage easily will (someday) be able to redefine elegantly. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. We will expand our power to iterate without diminishing our capability to exploit. Think real-world. We here at Metafilter have come to know that it is better to scale extensibly than to incubate virally. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack next-generation channels. We will integrate the term "granular". Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-half of your budget for unleashing. The development factor is affiliate-based. Our frictionless feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our turn-key biometrics and user-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will target the capability of channels to morph. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and J2EE. We will synergize the capacity of aggregation to optimize.