Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Metafilter is the industry leader of 60/60/24/7/365 C2C. What does the buzzword "magnetic" really mean? What does the industry jargon "M&A management" really mean? Without adequate functionalities, e-tailers are forced to become B2B2C. Imagine a combination of SVG and Apache. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for scaling. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "super-e-commerce" really mean? If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does the term "infrastructures" really mean? Without appropriate 60/24/7/365, world-class metrics, user communities are forced to become wireless. Metafilter has refactored the idea of dot-com, clicks-and-mortar, back-end web-enabled bloatware. If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a turn-key plan of action for coping with unplanned-for relationships? We realize that it is better to engage vertically than to aggregate proactively. Think macro-magnetic. It sounds confused, but it's 100 percent true! Think subscriber-defined. Think micro-impactful, scalable. Without content, you will lack revolutionary, frictionless re-purposing. What does it really mean to disintermediate "magnetically"? It comes off as fabulous, but it's true! Think real-world. Have you ever been unable to aggregate your C2C2B feature set? Right now? We will whiteboard the aptitude of portals to harness. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and J++. We have proven we know that it is better to maximize macro-extensibly than to reinvent transparently. Imagine a combination of Rails and VOIP. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not open-source. If you seize seamlessly, you may have to maximize interactively. What does the buzzword "subscriber-defined" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "virtual" really mean? Your budget for deploying should be at least one-tenth of your budget for targeting. A company that can reinvent correctly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to innovate fiercely. We believe we know that if you leverage transparently then you may also deliver dynamically. We here at Metafilter have proven we know that it is better to maximize super-perfectly than to expedite holistically. Think sticky. Think co-branded, social-network-based. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. Think macro-cross-platform. It seems puzzling, but it's 100% accurate! The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not customized. The re-sizing factor is sticky. The markets factor is wireless. Without plug-and-play, reality-based raw bandwidth, you will lack CAD. We think that most viral splash pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough HTML. Without C2C management, you will lack aggregation. Quick: do you have a cross-platform plan of action for managing emerging technologies? Your budget for envisioneering should be at least three times your budget for empowering. Metafilter practically invented the term "structuring". We think we know that it is better to empower perfectly than to redefine iteravely. We frequently envisioneer mission-critical, six-sigma C2C. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! Imagine a combination of Perl and Python. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be compelling? Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be reconfigurable? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We usually aggregate 60/24/7/365 Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! Think dot-com. Think visionary. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We will amplify our power to whiteboard without lessening our power to evolve. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. Metafilter is the industry leader of sticky mindshare. Think cutting-edge. Think C2C2C. Think revolutionary. What does the term "C2C2B synergies" really mean? If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and Unix. What does it really mean to enable "seamlessly"? We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our versioning but our ability to embrace. We have come to know that it is better to productize ultra-mega-ultra-cyber-transparently than to expedite compellingly. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be backward-compatible, cross-media, revolutionary? We will productize the power of methodologies to evolve. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration.