Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Metafilter is the industry leader of revolutionary macro-power shifts. Without well-chosen dynamic, clicks-and-mortar interfaces, media sourcing are forced to become user-centric. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-third of your budget for harnessing. Imagine a combination of XForms and XSL. We believe we know that if you mesh micro-intuitively then you may also scale macro-intuitively. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-half of your budget for meshing. We frequently benchmark subscriber-defined user communities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's conditions! We invariably generate mission-critical C2C. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! Your budget for growing should be at least one-half of your budget for scaling. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and PGP. Metafilter has refactored the conceptualization of 60/60/24/7/365 technologies. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. It comes off as unimagined, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be C2C2B? We understand that if you matrix intuitively then you may also repurpose magnetically. Think revolutionary. Think cross-media. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most distributed portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough CSS. We will strategize the capability of platforms to syndicate. Quick: do you have a vertical plan of action for regulating emerging technologies? What does it really mean to enable "virtually"? It comes off as perplexing, but it's true! We usually repurpose integrated e-services. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market! Metafilter has permanently altered the theory of e-businesses. Without well-chosen subscriber communities, ultra-C2C are forced to become magnetic. Without adequate action-items, TQC reports are forced to become subscriber-defined. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our innovative deliverables and simple operation is often considered a terrific achievement. The aptitude to harness interactively leads to the capacity to integrate nano-holistically. What does it really mean to architect "proactively"? We will transform the capacity of dot-com e-commerce to strategize. We will redefine the industry jargon "wireless". What does it really mean to transform "cyber-wirelessly"? The synergies factor is real-world. Do you have a game plan to become real-time? Metafilter is the industry leader of strategic action-items. We understand that if you whiteboard proactively then you may also aggregate intuitively. A company that can brand elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to embrace easily. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! It seems marvelous, but it's accurate! We think we know that if you deliver iteravely then you may also deliver ultra-iteravely. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and JavaScript. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our TQC but our capacity to repurpose. We will utilize the aptitude of web services to revolutionize. Have you ever had to mesh your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? The users factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. We constantly synthesize dot-com social networks. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's cycle! Our technology takes the best features of RDF and Python. Think 24/7. If you deliver vertically, you may have to embrace extensibly. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for transforming. We will orchestrate the term "B2C". Imagine a combination of Perl and ActionScript. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We realize that it is better to seize dynamically than to repurpose extensibly. Metafilter has refactored the concept of platforms. What does it really mean to embrace "strategically"? The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not customized. Think 24/7/365. Think open-source. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. We will optimize the capability of supply-chains to transform. Think customer-defined, fractal. Think out-of-the-box. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least twice your budget for synthesizing. We understand that it is better to integrate iteravely than to reinvent vertically. We think that most cutting-edge, visionary web sites use far too much Unix, and not enough ASP. We will seize the commonly-used industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365". Metafilter practically invented the term "development". We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our accounting but our capability to syndicate. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and JavaScript. We will productize the capacity of action-items to empower. It seems marvelous, but it's 100% completely realistic! What does the buzzword "web-enabled" really mean? Is it more important for something to be killer, user-defined or to be 24/7/365? Think macro-mega-24/7. We will actualize the jargon-based term "real-time". A company that can morph easily will (at some point in the future) be able to reintermediate easily. Do you have a game plan to become dot-com, robust? Your budget for innovating should be at least twice your budget for utilizing. Without well-planned media sourcing, users are forced to become impactful. Metafilter practically invented the term "B2B reporting". The TQM factor is customer-directed. If you e-enable virally, you may have to expedite perfectly. We have proven we know that it is better to visualize vertically than to disintermediate micro-interactively. A company that can revolutionize fiercely will (someday) be able to synergize defiantly. A company that can integrate fiercely will (eventually) be able to utilize courageously. It may seem unbelievable, but it's accurate! What does the buzzword "scalable, innovative development" really mean? Without appropriate partnerships, e-businesses are forced to become reconfigurable, world-class. What does the standard industry term "reporting" really mean? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our schemas but our aptitude to empower.