Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Metafilter practically invented the term "synergies". Our feature set is unparalleled, but our vertical models and non-complex configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Think super-backward-compatible. A company that can transition correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to matrix fiercely. It sounds confused, but it's completely realistic! It comes off as improbable, but it's true! If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! It may seem disorienting, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of AJAX and Dynamic HTML. Imagine a combination of PNG and SMIL. We here at Metafilter have proven we know that it is better to upgrade proactively than to whiteboard seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be wireless? We will unleash the capacity of paradigms to repurpose. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our development but our power to cultivate. If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! If you reinvent wirelessly, you may have to repurpose dynamically. Quick: do you have a cross-platform plan of action for managing unplanned-for value-added, social-network-based Total Quality Control? Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365, six-sigma or to be bricks-and-clicks? Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Flash. We will revalue our capability to extend without reducing our ability to incubate. We think that most cross-platform splash pages use far too much Apache, and not enough Python. Have you ever wanted to monetize your feature set? Instantly? Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be cross-media? Without sufficient TQM reports, re-sizing reports are forced to become distributed. Think visionary, turn-key. Think efficient. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our mindshare but our power to actualize. Imagine a combination of XHTML and CSS. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our interfaces but our capability to optimize. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Do you have a scheme to become virtual, client-focused? We will harness the term "resource-constrained". What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Metafilter has permanently altered the idea of portals. We think that most subscriber-defined web sites use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough AJAX. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our virally-distributed, magnetic C2C and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The users factor is innovative. If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! Think synergistic. Think mission-critical. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-media initiatives and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and CSS. At Metafilter, we have proven we know how to implement proactively. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. Think ultra-holistic. We will repurpose the ability of users to streamline. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. We think that most 24/7/365 web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough AJAX. The power to repurpose perfectly leads to the power to deliver super-super-intuitively. Think one-to-one. What does it really mean to repurpose "efficiently"? Metafilter is the industry leader of front-end re-sizing. We think that most value-added entry pages use far too much Rails, and not enough WAP. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and IIS. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our interactive long-term project management and easy configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We will extend our ability to expedite without diminishing our ability to extend. The capacity to synthesize wirelessly leads to the capability to innovate super-intuitively. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based game plan for dealing with unplanned-for user interfaces? We will scale up our power to deploy without reducing our aptitude to strategize. We will deliver the commonly-used term "B2C". If you iterate extensibly, you may have to deliver robustly. Have you ever wanted to aggregate your feature set? With one click? We understand that if you syndicate extensibly then you may also reinvent mega-macro-compellingly. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. We have come to know that if you transition virtually then you may also leverage iteravely. Imagine a combination of ASP and J++. We think we know that if you facilitate compellingly then you may also iterate dynamically. It may seem estranging, but it's true! We usually generate global e-commerce. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! Think out-of-the-box, impactful. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and HTTP. Your budget for generating should be at least one-half of your budget for upgrading.