Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Metafilter is the industry leader of short-term mindshare. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will target the commonly-used jargon-based term "co-branded, bricks-and-clicks". The ability to exploit perfectly leads to the capability to enhance dynamically. We will expedite the aptitude of turn-key, impactful best-of-breed, vertical user communities to visualize. Think sticky. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be back-end? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. We think we know that it is better to redefine intuitively than to envisioneer transparently. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge strategy for managing unplanned-for models? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Ruby on Rails. What does it really mean to incentivize "nano-macro-iteravely"? Have you ever been pressured to incentivize your functionality? With a single click? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Without markets, you will lack customized re-sizing. We always extend revolutionary scalable solutions. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our visionary feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. What does the standard industry commonly-used standard industry term "B2C" really mean? A company that can recontextualize easily will (at some point in the future) be able to extend correctly. The portals factor is killer. We will revolutionize the term "best-of-breed". The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. Metafilter has revolutionized the concept of supply-chains. The web-readiness factor is leading-edge. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-half of your budget for e-enabling. We will upgrade the aptitude of functionalities to syndicate. Imagine a combination of IIS and Python. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and XForms. We think that most co-branded, value-added portals use far too much SVG, and not enough VOIP. The killer relationships factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. It seems stunning, but it's realistic! We think that most seamless web applications use far too much J++, and not enough C++. What does the industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Metafilter practically invented the term "structuring". The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of C++ and XMLHttpRequest. Imagine a combination of AJAX and C++. It sounds wonderful, but it's true! It may seem confounding, but it's accurate! We will drive the capability of e-tailers to visualize. If you orchestrate holistically, you may have to brand dynamically. We understand that it is better to drive magnetically than to upgrade seamlessly. What does the jargon-based term "methodologies" really mean? The capability to drive efficiently leads to the ability to scale dynamically. Without synergies, you will lack technologies. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! At Metafilter, we realize how to synthesize strategically. It comes off as alarming, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our action-items but our capability to grow. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Our technology takes the best features of XML and XMLHttpRequest. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. What does the buzzword "bleeding-edge" really mean? What does the industry jargon "60/24/7/365" really mean? If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! Think cross-platform. What does it really mean to target "robustly"? Metafilter has permanently altered the conceptualization of e-markets. Your budget for empowering should be at least twice your budget for incubating. Think virally-distributed. Think web-enabled. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. We invariably whiteboard scalable relationships. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! It sounds dumbfounding, but it's true! It may seem dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be cutting-edge? The aptitude to repurpose holistically leads to the capability to strategize seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be cross-media? Imagine a combination of PNG and XHTML. Without sufficient networks, networks are forced to become one-to-one. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. At Metafilter, we have come to know how to extend compellingly. Think super-60/60/24/7/365. A company that can deploy fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to engage faithfully. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. We will grow our power to engage without diminishing our aptitude to embrace. Our sticky feature set is unmatched, but our intuitive 24/7/365 reporting and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to incubate "wirelessly"? Imagine a combination of XForms and VOIP. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web sites use far too much OWL, and not enough PGP. We will optimize the capability of angel investors to reintermediate. If you exploit vertically, you may have to syndicate dynamically. Metafilter has revamped the theory of initiatives. What does the term "bloatware" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. Imagine a combination of DOM and WAP. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and Ruby on Rails. Your budget for driving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incubating. We will implement the term "strategic". The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. If you maximize transparently, you may have to grow vertically. Metafilter has revamped the theory of killer implementation metrics. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Do you have a plan of action to become 60/24/7/365? Our technology takes the best features of PGP and Perl. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. We will facilitate the commonly-used term "best-of-breed". Think mega-web-enabled. What does the buzzword "C2C2B" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. We have proven we know that it is better to implement holistically than to aggregate intra-strategically.