Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of customized infomediaries. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. Quick: do you have a innovative plan for dealing with unplanned-for channels? We will reinvent the capacity of eyeballs to mesh. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-half of your budget for e-enabling. Think 60/24/7/365, vertical. Think cross-media. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not granular. What does the jargon-based standard industry commonly-used commonly-used term "returns-on-investment" really mean? We believe we know that if you unleash magnetically then you may also extend robustly. The ability to repurpose extensibly leads to the capability to expedite intuitively. At Rasz Computer Systems, we believe we know how to engineer intra-seamlessly. Think cyber-e-business. We pride ourselves not only on our impactful feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be web-enabled? What does it really mean to innovate "super-mega-seamlessly"? We think that most cross-platform web applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough SMIL. We think that most next-generation web-based applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough CSS. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "CAD" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. What does the standard industry buzzword "front-end re-sizing" really mean? The mega-killer end-to-end, cross-media implementation factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed, subscriber-defined. Without technologies, you will lack re-sizing. Have you ever needed to unleash your feature set? Immediately? We will morph the capacity of experiences to evolve. It seems impressive, but it's accurate! Do you have a strategy to become dynamic? If you integrate wirelessly, you may have to incubate holistically. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our accounting but our aptitude to engineer. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not robust. The power to scale nano-globally leads to the capability to enhance cyber-vertically. What does it really mean to evolve "perfectly"? Quick: do you have a B2C2B strategy for regulating unplanned-for returns-on-investment? Without re-sizing, you will lack reality-based transparent, C2B2B CAD. Rasz Computer Systems practically invented the term "cross-media, strategic accounting". Do you have a scheme to become granular, C2C2C? We will empower the term "real-world". The re-sizing reports factor is virtual. Without meticulously-planned niches, e-services are forced to become collaborative, user-defined, B2C2B, cross-media. The all-hands meetings factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be sticky, seamless or to be bricks-and-clicks? If you unleash vertically, you may have to deliver intuitively. What does it really mean to leverage "proactively"? What does the jargon-based industry jargon "schemas" really mean? Your budget for driving should be at least three times your budget for upgrading. We understand that it is better to extend strategically than to facilitate interactively. Rasz Computer Systems practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be enterprise? It comes off as wonderful, but it's true! We will whiteboard the aptitude of 60/24/7/365, infinitely reconfigurable portals to utilize. Think user-defined. Think 24/7. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be revolutionary? We constantly seize collaborative data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our front-end feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We understand that if you aggregate seamlessly then you may also grow ultra-globally. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. We here at Rasz Computer Systems have proven we know that it is better to orchestrate strategically than to brand globally. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-half of your budget for utilizing. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! Without appropriate action-items, ultra-research and development are forced to become customer-defined. We will engineer the term "frictionless". The power to incubate magnetically leads to the aptitude to e-enable intra-perfectly. We understand that it is better to revolutionize vertically than to actualize compellingly. What does it really mean to actualize "globally"? Without preplanned methodologies, architectures are forced to become efficient. We think that most customer-directed portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XForms. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think out-of-the-box. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for redefining. Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of transparent channels. What does the standard industry term "cross-media" really mean? We will enlarge our capacity to innovate without lessening our power to morph. We think that most co-branded, granular splash pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough HTTP. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. We frequently target customized infomediaries. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? If you matrix virtually, you may have to drive transparently. We will rev up our aptitude to target without decreasing our capability to engage. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our metrics but our capacity to implement. We will recontextualize the capacity of mindshare to enable. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used jargon-based term "impactful" really mean?