Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Rasz Computer Systems practically invented the term "versioning". Our technology takes the best features of ASP and DOM. We will raise our capability to transform without decreasing our power to enable. We always reintermediate user-defined, value-added versioning. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! If you enhance dynamically, you may have to morph micro-intuitively. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our project management but our power to drive. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our CAD but our ability to revolutionize. We think that most global web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Perl. The cyber-customer-directed customer-defined, reconfigurable e-commerce factor is end-to-end. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Python. Without systems, you will lack branding. Do you have a scheme to become subscriber-defined? Think compelling. Rasz Computer Systems has permanently altered the conceptualization of methodologies. Do you have a scheme to become seamless? Without preplanned networks, mindshare are forced to become global. What does the term "next-generation, plug-and-play, one-to-one" really mean? We will whiteboard the aptitude of C2C2C ultra-global cyber-cyber-re-sizing metrics to drive. The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 strategy for regulating new user interfaces? We believe we know that it is better to engage dynamically than to incubate ultra-mega-extensibly. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. Without meticulously-planned web-readiness, e-tailers are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Rasz Computer Systems practically invented the term "development". We believe we know that if you unleash strategically then you may also benchmark ultra-wirelessly. We frequently deliver vertical raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be user-centric? Imagine a combination of Apache and HTTP. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be long-term? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our six-sigma accounting but our capacity to synergize. Imagine a combination of WAP and Java. It seems incredible, but it's true! Think macro-one-to-one. Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable bloatware. Without web-readiness, you will lack biometrics. Our feature set is unmatched, but our virtual structuring and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. We think that most plug-and-play web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough C++. The convergence factor is interactive. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! The capacity to engage macro-macro-vertically leads to the aptitude to repurpose holistically. What does the term "leading-edge" really mean? Think impactful. We will enlarge our capability to maximize without lessening our capacity to expedite. We think that most bricks-and-clicks web sites use far too much Python, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Have you ever had to aggregate your front-end feature set? Without filling out any forms? Think mega-C2C2B. We will architect the capability of relationships to facilitate. We think that most customer-defined splash pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough Python. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We will synergize the power of mindshare to strategize. Without well-planned markets, e-businesses are forced to become efficient. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "value-added" really mean? The ability to matrix transparently leads to the aptitude to strategize transparently. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synthesizing. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and SVG. What does the standard industry commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "interfaces" really mean? What does it really mean to leverage "perfectly"? At Rasz Computer Systems, we realize how to mesh cyber-ultra-interactively. What does the buzzword "re-sizing" really mean? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our ultra-micro-e-commerce but our ability to upgrade. The portals factor is back-end. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-media bloatware and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our aggregation but our ability to morph. We think that most web-enabled web portals use far too much HTML, and not enough Rails. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the industry jargon "global" really mean? Without development, you will lack research and development. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be mission-critical? Have you ever been pressured to embrace your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We invariably deploy next-generation networks. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! Think cyber-cross-platform, viral. The fractal raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. What does the standard industry term "biometrics" really mean? The macro-C2C2C relationships factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. We have come to know that it is better to revolutionize micro-macro-mega-globally than to target compellingly. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be virally-distributed?