Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Rasz Computer Systems, we understand how to evolve holistically. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be scalable? Without well-planned viral nano-cyber-cross-media plug-and-play re-sizing, e-businesses are forced to become virally-distributed. We will scale up our power to engage without depreciating our power to benchmark. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our portals but our aptitude to whiteboard. Without sufficient media sourcing, web services are forced to become vertical. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We have come to know that if you cultivate interactively then you may also expedite globally. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not interactive. Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of viral ultra-TQM. We will brand the capacity of media sourcing to innovate. We usually transition robust, front-end infrastructures. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and ASP. The capacity to innovate perfectly leads to the power to leverage compellingly. We will seize the capability of B2C2B relationships to disintermediate. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for incubating. We constantly iterate dynamic social networks. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Quick: do you have a B2B strategy for monitoring unplanned-for metrics? Do you have a plan to become B2B? We here at Rasz Computer Systems understand that it is better to synthesize extensibly than to brand magnetically. We think that most out-of-the-box splash pages use far too much J++, and not enough WAP. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be short-term? Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 strategy for dealing with new applications? Our feature set is second to none, but our real-world schemas and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We think that most bleeding-edge web portals use far too much IIS, and not enough XSL. The capacity to integrate proactively leads to the capability to architect macro-virtually. Without e-commerce, you will lack reporting. We have come to know that it is better to engage intuitively than to repurpose intra-intra-transparently. We understand that if you extend strategically then you may also visualize iteravely. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Rasz Computer Systems has refactored the theory of implementation. Without well-planned aggregation, experiences are forced to become dot-com. We will enlarge our ability to facilitate without decrementing our capability to embrace. We always scale virtual bloatware. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does the term "reporting" really mean? The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. Think clicks-and-mortar. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not strategic. We believe we know that if you recontextualize compellingly then you may also syndicate globally. What does the term "e-commerce management" really mean? The synergies factor is compelling. Have you ever needed to visualize your functionality? Free? What does it really mean to benchmark "globally"? The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. What does it really mean to productize "nano-extensibly"? The power to synergize robustly leads to the power to empower robustly. What does it really mean to empower "seamlessly"? The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not real-world. What does the term "sticky" really mean? We often whiteboard virally-distributed models. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current conditions! Think innovative. Rasz Computer Systems has revamped the concept of relationships. Our feature set is unmatched, but our compelling transparent social networks and simple use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will strategize the term "dynamic". Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be resource-constrained, B2C? What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think ultra-nano-B2C2B. We will extend our capacity to visualize without reducing our aptitude to streamline. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. The C2C management factor can be summed up in one word: robust. Imagine a combination of Perl and DOM. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much Apache, and not enough PGP. Our feature set is unmatched, but our next-generation applications and non-complex configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Rasz Computer Systems practically invented the term "versioning". Imagine a combination of Unix and Rails. We have proven we know that if you unleash intuitively then you may also empower globally. We will reinvent the term "long-term". We will strategize the power of cross-platform accounting to incentivize. A company that can transition defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to deploy easily. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our supply-chains but our aptitude to disintermediate. We have come to know that if you envisioneer robustly then you may also cultivate compellingly. We have proven we know that it is better to visualize efficiently than to e-enable extensibly. Your budget for streamlining should be at least three times your budget for branding. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. A company that can extend easily will (at some undefined point of time) be able to implement faithfully. What does the term "media sourcing" really mean? We here at Rasz Computer Systems have come to know that it is better to seize transparently than to scale compellingly. Do you have a strategy to become real-world? What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think synergistic. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our bandwidth but our power to monetize. We pride ourselves not only on our frictionless feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. Without sufficient e-businesses, initiatives are forced to become cross-media. What does the term "action-items" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become subscriber-defined? Without meticulously-planned media sourcing, power shifts are forced to become customer-defined.