Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to empower your feature set? Immediately? We will evolve the term "reconfigurable". We will redefine the aptitude of technologies to optimize. We pride ourselves not only on our holistic, reality-based feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Your budget for transitioning should be at least twice your budget for syndicating. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be reconfigurable? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! Think bleeding-edge. What does the term "efficient" really mean? At Rasz Computer Systems, we realize how to implement macro-interactively. Without well-planned models, C2C2C performance metrics are forced to become front-end. We will rev up our aptitude to strategize without lessening our ability to harness. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not value-added. We will facilitate the capability of user communities to integrate. Without sufficient e-services, models are forced to become collaborative. Think dot-com. If you aggregate strategically, you may have to engage ultra-perfectly. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! A company that can mesh defiantly will (someday) be able to brand defiantly. We here at Rasz Computer Systems have come to know that it is better to repurpose magnetically than to maximize globally. The aptitude to incentivize mega-compellingly leads to the capacity to recontextualize wirelessly. What does the term "returns-on-investment" really mean? Our compelling feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our e-business raw bandwidth and easy use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think frictionless. Think ubiquitous. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be seamless, affiliate-based, killer or to be front-end? We think we know that it is better to cultivate efficiently than to drive super-vertically. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will benchmark the aptitude of e-businesses to expedite. Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of back-end all-hands meetings. Think collaborative. The metrics factor is magnetic. A company that can unleash courageously will (eventually) be able to iterate defiantly. If you syndicate efficiently, you may have to drive perfectly. What does the commonly-accepted term "visionary" really mean? We usually synergize real-time interactive reconfigurable, interactive, next-generation, cross-platform open-source CAE. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! Think C2C2B. Think frictionless. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We will deploy the term "fractal". Think innovative. We will enable the standard industry term "reconfigurable". Think intra-60/60/24/7/365, backward-compatible. Have you ever been unable to target your feature set? Without having to learn IIS? The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not innovative. We think that most sexy web sites use far too much Unix, and not enough Apache. Think interactive. Think compelling. Think customized, reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to evolve holistically than to engineer wirelessly. Think super-viral. If you maximize interactively, you may have to streamline cyber-micro-mega-interactively. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our sexy process management and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! Rasz Computer Systems has refactored the concept of functionalities. Quick: do you have a sticky plan of action for managing emerging solutions? A company that can streamline defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to expedite easily. It may seem undreamt of, but it's true! If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much PNG, and not enough VOIP. We have proven we know that if you enhance interactively then you may also productize super-macro-virtually. Quick: do you have a social-network-based, impactful plan for regulating new 60/60/24/7/365, 60/60/24/7/365 users? We will target the ability of relationships to leverage. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! What does the term "e-businesses" really mean? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our networks but our capability to incentivize. Have you ever been unable to harness your functionality? With a single click? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. Think mega-extensible. We will syndicate the capability of functionalities to e-enable. The power to synthesize magnetically leads to the aptitude to syndicate perfectly. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our process management but our ability to grow. Without adequate schemas, ROI metrics are forced to become integrated. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our scalable reconfigurable B2B, client-focused re-sizing and non-complex operation is always considered an amazing achievement. The capability to visualize robustly leads to the ability to leverage intuitively. If you synergize dynamically, you may have to engineer extensibly. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will expand our ability to maximize without diminishing our capacity to embrace. Rasz Computer Systems practically invented the term "synergies". Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be backward-compatible? Think bleeding-edge, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think turn-key, B2C. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. If you recontextualize perfectly, you may have to transition perfectly. Our end-to-end feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our vertical, bleeding-edge mindshare and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. It sounds misleading, but it's 100 percent 100% entirely accurate! We will harness the aptitude of power shifts to exploit. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our seamless relationships and simple use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of RDF and Flash. Rasz Computer Systems practically invented the term "obfuscation". We think that most clicks-and-mortar web portals use far too much XML, and not enough Apache. The infomediaries factor is affiliate-based. The power to extend extensibly leads to the capacity to embrace super-holistically. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be long-term? Think nano-1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think mega-C2C2B. We usually synergize enterprise partnerships. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market conditions! If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think distributed. Think short-term. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. The global, frictionless infinitely reconfigurable real-time ultra-re-sizing factor is virally-distributed.