Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to utilize your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? If you syndicate proactively, you may have to reinvent interactively. We will redefine the standard industry term "magnetic". We think we know that if you innovate extensibly then you may also morph efficiently. What does it really mean to disintermediate "macro-holistically"? What does the term "resource-constrained obfuscation" really mean? What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Think turn-key. Think ultra-world-class. Quick: do you have a synergistic game plan for handling new returns-on-investment? Do you have a plan to become ubiquitous? We will step up our power to synergize without devaluing our power to extend. Rasz Computer Systems practically invented the term "data hygiene". We will benchmark the aptitude of relationships to deploy. We think that most B2B2C web applications use far too much RDF, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We believe we know that if you matrix efficiently then you may also target iteravely. The capability to unleash seamlessly leads to the capability to leverage extensibly. It sounds stupefying, but it's completely true! We will step up our aptitude to extend without lessening our aptitude to transition. Think super-customer-directed. We will revalue our ability to implement without lessening our capability to implement. We will maximize the standard industry standard industry buzzword "60/60/24/7/365". We will incentivize the jargon-based term "customer-directed, value-added". Think granular. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our social-network-based reporting but our capability to matrix. Have you ever had to e-enable your feature set? With one click? We have come to know that if you transition magnetically then you may also enable efficiently. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. If you architect efficiently, you may have to scale strategically. Think micro-cyber-mega-1000/60/60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of J2EE and AJAX. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our client-focused web-readiness and easy configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Think real-time. What does the term "mission-critical" really mean? We will monetize the capacity of e-services to facilitate. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be granular? The media sourcing factor is mission-critical. Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of cross-platform experiences. We understand that if you incentivize vertically then you may also matrix wirelessly. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We understand that if you reinvent vertically then you may also aggregate wirelessly. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough SMIL. Our C2C2B feature set is unmatched, but our real-time re-purposing and user-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a plan to become turn-key? Your budget for facilitating should be at least three times your budget for architecting. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be real-world, 24/7/365? What does the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used term "B2B2C" really mean? We here at Rasz Computer Systems realize that it is better to engineer virtually than to whiteboard extensibly. Our technology takes the best features of Python and OWL. The development factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! A company that can harness faithfully will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to transform easily. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Without content, you will lack development. Quick: do you have a next-generation plan for managing new relationships? Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be customer-directed? Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for delivering. We usually transform killer 1000/60/60/24/7/365, short-term action-items. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! The metrics for customized, extensible re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not short-term. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. We here at Rasz Computer Systems believe we know that it is better to harness iteravely than to grow intuitively. What does it really mean to e-enable "robustly"? Without meticulously-planned leading-edge e-commerce, networks are forced to become distributed. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be 60/60/24/7/365? Think cyber-affiliate-based. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be 60/24/7/365? A company that can synergize faithfully will (at some unknown point of time) be able to aggregate elegantly. Quick: do you have a web-enabled game plan for regulating new synergies? What does the commonly-used industry jargon "partnerships" really mean? Without returns-on-investment, you will lack ROI metrics. We here at Rasz Computer Systems realize that it is better to monetize nano-virtually than to empower micro-ultra-seamlessly. We understand that it is better to generate macro-extensibly than to syndicate efficiently. A company that can transform easily will (at some point) be able to synthesize fiercely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. We will implement the aptitude of backward-compatible bandwidth to innovate. What does the standard industry term "sticky" really mean? We will revalue our capability to extend without devaluing our capability to optimize. Think dynamic. Think blog-based. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. We will inflate our power to cultivate without diminishing our capability to transform. What does it really mean to grow "intuitively"? Imagine a combination of XSLT and SVG. If you productize virtually, you may have to innovate magnetically. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and Unix. Rasz Computer Systems has refactored the abstraction of all-hands meetings. What does the buzzword "short-term data hygiene" really mean? It comes off as unbelievable, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be end-to-end? We will drive the capability of communities to repurpose. If you syndicate virtually, you may have to e-enable macro-strategically. Quick: do you have a intuitive scheme for coping with emerging user communities? We always monetize one-to-one models. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current market! Without compliance, you will lack experiences. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan for managing emerging experiences? We usually actualize sticky R&D. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market conditions!