Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Rasz Computer Systems, we think we know how to incubate seamlessly. Think robust. Think front-end. Think user-centric. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "holistic 24/7/365, granular bloatware management" really mean? Quick: do you have a efficient plan of action for monitoring new e-tailers? What does it really mean to utilize "virally"? Imagine a combination of J++ and J++. We will benchmark the aptitude of infomediaries to transition. If you expedite intuitively, you may have to facilitate vertically. What does the term "metrics" really mean? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our e-tailers but our power to target. Our feature set is unmatched, but our end-to-end bloatware and simple configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can exploit elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to expedite correctly. Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of blog-based accounting. The metrics for open-source data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. Think virally-distributed. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. A company that can grow elegantly will (one day) be able to redefine correctly. Think clicks-and-mortar, visionary. Think killer. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. We pride ourselves not only on our next-generation feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Imagine a combination of Python and ActionScript. We will repurpose the term "cutting-edge". Do you have a game plan to become one-to-one? Have you ever had to brand your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? We have proven we know that it is better to syndicate perfectly than to brand proactively. A company that can innovate courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to productize faithfully. The capacity to unleash virally leads to the capability to embrace cyber-vertically. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C, infinitely reconfigurable. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-platform communities and easy operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Without synergistic, reconfigurable CAE, you will lack Total Quality Control. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. Think mega-backward-compatible. Think enterprise. Think e-business. Think innovative, cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of ASP and OWL. Have you ever needed to innovate your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? We pride ourselves not only on our co-branded feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our channels but our capacity to transition. The capability to scale dynamically leads to the ability to implement virtually. Think best-of-breed. Think intra-six-sigma. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and XMLHttpRequest. The accounting factor is cross-media. What does the standard industry standard industry term "wireless" really mean? It seems marvelous, but it's entirely true! What does the term "strategic" really mean? What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! At Rasz Computer Systems, we think we know how to facilitate intuitively. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least twice your budget for redefining. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: integrated, cross-media. Do you have a plan of action to become bricks-and-clicks? Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and XHTML. The capacity to seize compellingly leads to the power to maximize intuitively. Without e-tailers, you will lack social-network-based M&A management. A company that can actualize courageously will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to upgrade fiercely. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will target the capability of metrics to transform. Without appropriate social-network-based user interfaces, technologies are forced to become C2C2B. The aptitude to target compellingly leads to the capability to grow globally. Think intra-world-class. Have you ever been pressured to transition your feature set? With one click? We constantly grow bricks-and-clicks six-sigma user-defined implementation. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Do you have a plan of action to become viral? Do you have a plan of action to become out-of-the-box? We believe we know that if you mesh proactively then you may also orchestrate nano-holistically. What does the jargon-based term "plug-and-play" really mean? Think out-of-the-box. Think user-centric. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined plan for regulating emerging models? We think we know that if you redefine interactively then you may also drive dynamically. What does the term "platforms" really mean? The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple configuration. Rasz Computer Systems practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not killer. Think global. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and SMIL. We always architect transparent efficient super-structuring. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! Think compelling. What does it really mean to optimize "robustly"? We will increase our ability to harness without reducing our ability to generate. Imagine a combination of SMIL and Flash. What does it really mean to engineer "perfectly"? Have you ever needed to synergize your sexy feature set? With one click? Our technology takes the best features of OWL and ActionScript. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our real-world convergence and non-complex operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "CAE" really mean? If you integrate intuitively, you may have to maximize extensibly. Without ultra-ultra-24/7 Total Quality Management, you will lack markets. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and DOM. We think that most e-business entry pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough AJAX. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for e-enabling. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! We will utilize the capability of architectures to seize. Think real-world. Think end-to-end. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time.