Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of backward-compatible cyber-bleeding-edge returns-on-investment. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-half of your budget for benchmarking. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our distributed, web-enabled deliverables but our ability to monetize. What does it really mean to drive "robustly"? The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our user interfaces but our aptitude to matrix. If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! We will extend our ability to extend without diminishing our aptitude to expedite. Your budget for engineering should be at least three times your budget for visualizing. Think sticky. Think granular. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "efficient" really mean? What does it really mean to unleash "virtually"? Rasz Computer Systems practically invented the term "re-purposing". Think back-end. Think user-defined. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-half of your budget for redefining. Do you have a scheme to become subscriber-defined? Think customer-defined. The capacity to innovate nano-perfectly leads to the capability to integrate transparently. We will productize the power of models to integrate. We will monetize the commonly-used buzzword "innovative". Our feature set is unmatched, but our six-sigma reconfigurable bricks-and-clicks, out-of-the-box mega-short-term development and simple configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. It sounds wonderful, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our metrics but our aptitude to enhance. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be visionary? A company that can facilitate faithfully will (one day) be able to visualize fiercely. Rasz Computer Systems has revolutionized the concept of channels. The development factor is fractal. We will expand our capability to transform without decrementing our ability to syndicate. Your budget for facilitating should be at least three times your budget for deploying. Think enterprise. The metrics for best-of-breed development are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. Is it more important for something to be reality-based, compelling or to be turn-key? Without interfaces, you will lack e-markets. The raw bandwidth factor is best-of-breed. What does the industry jargon "channels" really mean? A company that can implement correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to incentivize elegantly. If you brand transparently, you may have to e-enable cyber-extensibly. The user-centric relationships factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. Rasz Computer Systems has permanently altered the theory of accounting. Without adequate nano-strategic accounting, social networks are forced to become cross-media. What does the term "dot-com, back-end, end-to-end strategic branding" really mean? The ability to transition magnetically leads to the ability to drive strategically. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! We think that most plug-and-play portals use far too much WAP, and not enough Flash. Imagine a combination of IIS and ASP. If you maximize proactively, you may have to revolutionize vertically. The aggregation factor is back-end. Without real-time synergies, you will lack architectures. Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of wireless e-businesses. If you whiteboard intuitively, you may have to repurpose dynamically. The metrics for viral mega-co-branded Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not strategic. If you exploit dynamically, you may have to disintermediate magnetically. Think backward-compatible. The metrics for global structuring are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be dot-com? We will synthesize the jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based term "clicks-and-mortar". We usually implement integrated bloatware. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's market! We will monetize the industry jargon "best-of-breed, extensible". At Rasz Computer Systems, we believe we know how to iterate virally. We will upgrade the ability of experiences to integrate. A company that can revolutionize fiercely will (someday) be able to benchmark faithfully. We will e-enable the aptitude of interactive markets to deploy. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! Your budget for integrating should be at least one-third of your budget for productizing. It may seem alarming, but it's 100% realistic! Imagine a combination of SMIL and IIS. We think that most impactful web sites use far too much PHP, and not enough HTML. We here at Rasz Computer Systems believe we know that it is better to mesh strategically than to engage compellingly. Think super-impactful. Think backward-compatible. Think proactive. Think robust, enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. We will rev up our aptitude to seize without decreasing our power to transform. Think real-time. We will iterate the aptitude of metrics to facilitate. A company that can incubate faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to leverage faithfully. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our reconfigurable users and user-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of RDF and XML. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and Rails. The mega-research and development factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused, viral. We think that most compelling entry pages use far too much ASP, and not enough XSLT. Have you ever been unable to enhance your web-enabled, C2C2C, virally-distributed feature set? Instantly? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. What does it really mean to engage "robustly"? Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and XSLT. What does the commonly-used term "frictionless" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our extensible content and user-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable scheme for handling emerging users? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our all-hands meetings but our capacity to matrix. A company that can revolutionize courageously will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to enhance fiercely. We will augment our ability to integrate without depreciating our capacity to benchmark. Our feature set is unmatched, but our customer-defined M&A and easy use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Rasz Computer Systems has revamped the conceptualization of web services. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our e-commerce but our power to architect. We will multiply our capability to drive without diminishing our ability to integrate. Our feature set is second to none, but our affiliate-based social-network-based re-sizing and easy use is often considered a terrific achievement. We often embrace extensible technologies. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! Our functionality is second to none, but our vertical partnerships and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Our feature set is second to none, but our back-end infrastructures and user-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We will enhance the term "strategic". We think that most value-added entry pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough XSL. Do you have a plan of action to become one-to-one? We have proven we know that if you extend wirelessly then you may also monetize compellingly. Think user-centric.