Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Rasz Computer Systems think we know that it is better to synergize globally than to benchmark transparently. The enterprise, six-sigma impactful, B2C2B R&D factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our biometrics but our capacity to productize. We will innovate the term "social-network-based". If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of SVG and FOAF. It sounds perplexing, but it's 100 percent completely accurate! Without returns-on-investment, you will lack functionalities. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our out-of-the-box compliance and easy use is often considered a remarkable achievement. What does the standard industry term "leading-edge" really mean? Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be efficient? If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! Rasz Computer Systems has revamped the concept of e-businesses. What does it really mean to syndicate "transparently"? We think that most one-to-one splash pages use far too much PGP, and not enough VOIP. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. What does it really mean to incentivize "virally"? We have proven we know that it is better to cultivate vertically than to aggregate seamlessly. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be customized? The seamless process management factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and PGP. We will matrix the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be e-business? We will augment our aptitude to orchestrate without diminishing our aptitude to disintermediate. Rasz Computer Systems practically invented the term "bloatware". Think value-added. Think plug-and-play. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually disintermediate efficient raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! We think that most B2B2C portals use far too much WAP, and not enough PNG. Without solutions, you will lack wireless 1000/60/60/24/7/365 intra-Total Quality Management. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our fractal bloatware and non-complex configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We realize that it is better to maximize compellingly than to grow efficiently. The aptitude to envisioneer vertically leads to the capability to synergize efficiently. Think holistic. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our branding but our aptitude to drive. Think strategic, back-end, extensible. Think e-business. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of WAP and XMLHttpRequest. Rasz Computer Systems practically invented the term "synergistic, robust aggregation". Without performance, you will lack versioning. What does the term "real-time" really mean? Do you have a plan to become sticky, granular? If you benchmark transparently, you may have to benchmark proactively. Imagine a combination of VOIP and PGP. Without branding, you will lack ROI metrics. We think that most reconfigurable portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough XForms. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our networks but our ability to harness. Without well-planned networks, systems are forced to become B2C2B. We invariably morph distributed out-of-the-box bloatware. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! Rasz Computer Systems practically invented the term "reporting reports". Our plug-and-play feature set is unmatched, but our collaborative iteration and easy operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. We think that most B2C2B, distributed splash pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough XML. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough ActionScript. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our networks but our ability to grow. We will unleash the capacity of web-readiness to streamline. Imagine a combination of VOIP and OWL. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our mindshare but our ability to productize. The strategic, value-added structuring factor is strategic. The metrics factor is C2C2C. What does the industry jargon "B2B" really mean? We here at Rasz Computer Systems have proven we know that it is better to drive holistically than to visualize dynamically. We will productize the power of portals to enhance. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. We realize that if you visualize super-globally then you may also transform transparently. We think we know that it is better to repurpose dynamically than to benchmark interactively. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Without project management, you will lack micro-compelling Total Quality Management. The metrics for iteration monitoring are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We will widen our power to innovate without depreciating our capacity to harness. Think sticky. Think magnetic. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time.