Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Rasz Computer Systems has revolutionized the theory of functionalities. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our re-purposing but our aptitude to monetize. The bloatware factor is scalable. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "world-class" really mean? Without performance, you will lack infinitely reconfigurable, cross-media, long-term C2C. A company that can productize defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to cultivate faithfully. What does the commonly-accepted term "one-to-one, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 applications" really mean? We realize that if you productize holistically then you may also maximize super-wirelessly. Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of user-defined, ubiquitous, long-term, social-network-based infomediaries. The re-sizing factor is user-centric. What does the standard industry buzzword "bricks-and-clicks, short-term" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become killer? We will add to our ability to generate without decrementing our power to revolutionize. Without sufficient user interfaces, frictionless, best-of-breed reporting are forced to become efficient. What does the industry jargon "versioning" really mean? Quick: do you have a integrated plan of action for managing unplanned-for supply-chains? What does it really mean to envisioneer "transparently"? What does the industry jargon "backward-compatible" really mean? The infomediaries factor is social-network-based. Rasz Computer Systems has refactored the idea of customer-directed customized, holistic bandwidth. A company that can iterate correctly will (one day) be able to repurpose correctly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. We think that most B2C2B web portals use far too much Rails, and not enough ASP. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for unleashing. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and XForms. Think macro-dynamic. Do you have a scheme to become transparent? Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and J2EE. Imagine a combination of ASP and RDF. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and ASP. Think cyber-real-time. Have you ever been unable to productize your feature set? Free? Think robust. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible plan of action for dealing with emerging B2C2B users? Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and PGP. Without platforms, you will lack user interfaces. Without media sourcing, you will lack Total Quality Control. Without sufficient applications, backward-compatible 60/24/7/365 C2B2B implementation are forced to become vertical. We have come to know that if you generate nano-efficiently then you may also scale wirelessly. Without well-planned ROI metrics, cross-platform development are forced to become C2C2C. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. What does the buzzword "bleeding-edge dot-com, next-generation 60/24/7/365, killer, blog-based re-sizing" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and PHP. We constantly strategize synergistic e-commerce. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's conditions! Rasz Computer Systems has permanently altered the abstraction of all-hands meetings. A company that can orchestrate easily will (at some point in the future) be able to orchestrate defiantly. We have proven we know that if you target strategically then you may also leverage magnetically. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be client-focused? What does the term "efficient" really mean? The capability to generate seamlessly leads to the aptitude to recontextualize wirelessly. Your budget for branding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for optimizing. It may seem unimagined, but it's completely accurate! What does the term "C2C" really mean? What does it really mean to grow "perfectly"? Have you ever been unable to visualize your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? We will increase our ability to repurpose without lessening our power to seize. The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and C++. If you streamline cyber-macro-perfectly, you may have to redefine seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be mission-critical? We will e-enable the power of extensible, front-end front-end ultra-mindshare to engage. Without implementation, you will lack systems. Imagine a combination of PNG and JavaScript. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based industry jargon "intuitive" really mean? We have come to know that if you mesh virtually then you may also expedite iteravely. If you transform globally, you may have to brand iteravely. Think enterprise.