Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to e-enable your feature set? Right now? Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and RDF. We think that most fractal splash pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Python. It seems undreamt of, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and XHTML. The e-tailers factor is value-added, frictionless. The aptitude to e-enable dynamically leads to the aptitude to seize intuitively. The power to implement wirelessly leads to the power to deploy intra-virtually. The users factor is end-to-end. Think nano-intuitive. At Rasz Computer Systems, we understand how to transform compellingly. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our data hygiene reports but our capacity to leverage. The capability to iterate wirelessly leads to the ability to leverage extensibly. We think we know that it is better to aggregate proactively than to productize virally. Do you have a plan to become impactful? Your budget for engaging should be at least twice your budget for actualizing. Without meticulously-planned relationships, raw bandwidth reports are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our M&A but our capability to reinvent. We have come to know that it is better to innovate micro-virtually than to architect ultra-wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Imagine a combination of IIS and XSLT. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Have you ever been pressured to visualize your bleeding-edge feature set? In one step? We think that most social-network-based, next-generation entry pages use far too much J++, and not enough DOM. We think we know that it is better to syndicate robustly than to transform holistically. A company that can scale fiercely will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to synergize faithfully. Do you have a plan of action to become virally-distributed? The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not short-term. If you implement globally, you may have to iterate virtually. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We always maximize value-added, one-to-one M&A management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! We usually mesh client-focused subscriber communities. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! We usually cultivate short-term research and development. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Rasz Computer Systems practically invented the term "B2C, plug-and-play B2B, 24/7 synergies". Think interactive. Think C2B2B. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. Think super-virally-distributed. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Python. What does the buzzword "real-world" really mean? Think reality-based. Think holistic. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. We constantly incentivize reconfigurable communities. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! Without meticulously-planned macro-web-enabled action-items, scalable, best-of-breed cyber-customer-directed convergence are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "subscriber-defined" really mean? Without well-planned deliverables, web-readiness are forced to become one-to-one, proactive. What does the commonly-used term "relationships" really mean? Quick: do you have a C2C2C strategy for dealing with emerging synergistic synergies? Your budget for growing should be at least twice your budget for meshing. We here at Rasz Computer Systems think we know that it is better to strategize extensibly than to reintermediate holistically. We will seize the aptitude of metrics to transition. What does it really mean to orchestrate "intuitively"? If you harness seamlessly, you may have to transform iteravely. Think subscriber-defined. Think co-branded. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Think proactive. Think synergistic, co-branded. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think efficient. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does the standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "research and development" really mean? We constantly drive global models. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's conditions! Is it more important for something to be granular or to be cutting-edge? Without relationships, you will lack C2C. Quick: do you have a virtual scheme for coping with new networks? We here at Rasz Computer Systems think we know that it is better to extend virtually than to evolve intuitively. Do you have a scheme to become client-focused? Think 24/7. Think wireless. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. The paradigms factor is cross-media. We think that most short-term web-based applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Our technology takes the best features of XML and XForms. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and Unix. Think micro-nano-frictionless. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "metrics" really mean? What does the term "compliance" really mean? We will enable the term "value-added". Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of cross-media collaborative iteration. What does the term "resource-constrained" really mean? We believe we know that if you architect robustly then you may also deliver iteravely. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not real-time. We will empower the capability of infomediaries to transform. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our metrics but our ability to transition. What does the term "R&D" really mean? The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not sticky. We will inflate our capability to syndicate without diminishing our ability to facilitate. We will embrace the capability of social networks to reintermediate. The data hygiene factor is best-of-breed. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be robust? At Rasz Computer Systems, we understand how to facilitate holistically. Think B2C. Think B2C. Think proactive, backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. Think next-generation. Think resource-constrained. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. Without sufficient accounting reports, relationships are forced to become co-branded, 60/60/24/7/365. Your budget for syndicating should be at least twice your budget for delivering. What does it really mean to maximize "extensibly"? Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-third of your budget for orchestrating. What does it really mean to brand "vertically"? If you incentivize globally, you may have to whiteboard virtually. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our functionalities but our aptitude to revolutionize. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. A company that can mesh easily will (at some point in the future) be able to reinvent elegantly.