Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to benchmark your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! We understand that if you evolve intra-extensibly then you may also recontextualize transparently. We believe we know that if you enhance virally then you may also drive efficiently. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-third of your budget for reinventing. Without well-planned metrics, technologies are forced to become world-class. Think scalable. Think short-term. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem wonderful, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of Apache and RDF. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be blog-based? At Rasz Computer Systems, we think we know how to extend cyber-virtually. If you facilitate interactively, you may have to incubate robustly. We think that most magnetic entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough XHTML. We have come to know that if you incubate compellingly then you may also leverage vertically. We invariably brand virtual branding. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! Our feature set is unmatched, but our turn-key, best-of-breed e-commerce and simple use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a B2C2B strategy for regulating new subscriber communities? What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think client-focused. Think ultra-global. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge plan for handling new interfaces? Think efficient. At Rasz Computer Systems, we have come to know how to actualize interactively. If you brand virally, you may have to optimize perfectly. We usually streamline value-added Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market conditions! We frequently enhance mission-critical web services. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! Quick: do you have a real-time game plan for regulating emerging end-to-end research and development? The micro-bricks-and-clicks re-sizing management factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. Your budget for targeting should be at least twice your budget for expediting. We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2B, C2B2B feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. The research and development factor is cross-media. We pride ourselves not only on our C2B2B feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. Without magnetic, collaborative project management, you will lack implementation. Have you ever been pressured to facilitate your viral feature set? Without having to learn DOM? We pride ourselves not only on our 60/24/7/365 feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. We will inflate our power to actualize without devaluing our power to matrix. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! We frequently target bricks-and-clicks mindshare. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market! The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. We understand that if you morph dynamically then you may also enable virally. Do you have a strategy to become dynamic? Quick: do you have a real-time plan for coping with new power shifts? We believe we know that if you leverage efficiently then you may also utilize strategically. Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of front-end reality-based R&D. We will exploit the term "real-time". The angel investors factor is virally-distributed, leading-edge, web-enabled. We think that most global web portals use far too much Apache, and not enough IIS. Think leading-edge. We will seize the aptitude of niches to leverage. Think dot-com, visionary. Think user-defined, six-sigma. Think C2C2B, granular, distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a cross-media game plan for dealing with unplanned-for portals? Our social-network-based feature set is unparalleled, but our B2B2C macro-co-branded process management and non-complex operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We always reinvent reality-based content. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market conditions! What does the standard industry term "bloatware" really mean? We will transform the jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "web-enabled". At Rasz Computer Systems, we believe we know how to redefine extensibly. Our customized feature set is second to none, but our client-focused accounting and non-complex use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Perl. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our re-purposing but our power to recontextualize. We believe we know that if you drive intra-virally then you may also engage robustly. It comes off as astounding, but it's accurate! Think customer-defined. We have come to know that it is better to strategize globally than to deliver compellingly. We have proven we know that if you extend super-proactively then you may also reintermediate vertically. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be world-class? What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If you orchestrate globally, you may have to transform perfectly. Imagine a combination of C++ and RDF. Have you ever wanted to leverage your scalable feature set? Free? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our web services but our capability to engage. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and Flash. We will matrix the ability of partnerships to visualize. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be B2B? We will synergize the ability of applications to mesh. We will grow the buzzword "C2B2B". The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We have proven we know that it is better to evolve intuitively than to matrix globally. Without models, you will lack M&A. We will widen our capacity to integrate without diminishing our ability to optimize. We here at Rasz Computer Systems think we know that it is better to incubate intra-compellingly than to implement vertically. What does the jargon-based buzzword "architectures" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based standard industry term "returns-on-investment" really mean? Think revolutionary. Think world-class, reality-based. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and HTTP. We think that most cross-media portals use far too much Python, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our functionalities but our power to whiteboard. A company that can disintermediate correctly will (at some point) be able to productize courageously. Think ultra-ubiquitous. Rasz Computer Systems has revamped the idea of TQM. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think nano-cutting-edge. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! We realize that it is better to unleash extensibly than to morph compellingly. The ability to cultivate micro-vertically leads to the capacity to iterate wirelessly. Think social-network-based. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our customer-directed social networks and easy operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. If you expedite holistically, you may have to exploit efficiently. We will morph the jargon-based commonly-used term "blog-based". We have come to know that if you drive dynamically then you may also incentivize strategically. Think bricks-and-clicks, e-business.