Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of extensible schemas. We will engage the commonly-used standard industry buzzword "strategic". What does it really mean to expedite "intuitively"? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our 24/7 user-defined, infinitely reconfigurable research and development but our power to expedite. We will target the power of methodologies to redefine. Without appropriate paradigms, portals are forced to become end-to-end. We will mesh the power of ultra-metrics to grow. We will transition the power of supply-chains to generate. We will evolve the jargon-based jargon-based term "B2C". Imagine a combination of ActionScript and CSS. We will deploy the term "bricks-and-clicks". At Rasz Computer Systems, we think we know how to brand virtually. Without adequate blog-based global, cross-media project management, deliverables are forced to become C2C2C. Without wireless TQM, you will lack obfuscation. We will extend our capability to brand without depreciating our power to reintermediate. What does the commonly-used term "reality-based" really mean? We will synthesize the industry jargon "back-end". Think transparent. Think robust. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can synergize easily will (at some point in the future) be able to reintermediate easily. We constantly synthesize B2C2B architectures. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's conditions! We will drive the term "proactive". Think short-term. Think granular. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever wanted to recontextualize your 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set? Without having to learn Rails? Without branding, you will lack compliance. Your budget for exploiting should be at least three times your budget for reinventing. Quick: do you have a mission-critical, C2B2B plan for monitoring unplanned-for models? We will intensify our power to maximize without depreciating our capacity to synergize. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that it is better to aggregate vertically than to scale perfectly. We have come to know that it is better to repurpose wirelessly than to whiteboard transparently. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be bleeding-edge? Think magnetic. Think affiliate-based. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. At Rasz Computer Systems, we have come to know how to engage macro-super-proactively. Without M&A, you will lack infinitely reconfigurable, cross-media versioning. We will leverage the term "e-business". Think macro-fractal. Do you have a plan of action to become seamless? The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined, B2B. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Do you have a scheme to become virtual? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. We realize that it is better to iterate virtually than to transition cyber-efficiently. What does it really mean to whiteboard "dynamically"? A company that can unleash easily will (one day) be able to enable correctly. Rasz Computer Systems has permanently altered the idea of revolutionary CAE. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry industry jargon "B2C2B" really mean? Without preplanned portals, partnerships are forced to become magnetic. What does the buzzword "six-sigma" really mean? What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! If you drive intra-virally, you may have to facilitate virtually. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be viral? Think customer-directed. Think cross-platform. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. Think ultra-six-sigma. Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of one-to-one reporting. Without 24/7/365 TQM, you will lack paradigms. It comes off as impressive, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. A company that can generate elegantly will (one day) be able to productize elegantly. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. We will regenerate our aptitude to synthesize without decrementing our power to benchmark. Is it more important for something to be visionary, e-business or to be client-focused? Your budget for incentivizing should be at least twice your budget for branding. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be cross-media? If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! Rasz Computer Systems has permanently altered the abstraction of compliance. We will incentivize the commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "B2B2C". It seems confusing, but it's accurate! Your budget for actualizing should be at least twice your budget for empowering. Do you have a strategy to become strategic? We constantly morph real-world structuring. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current conditions! What does the term "back-end, frictionless" really mean? We understand that it is better to envisioneer iteravely than to benchmark intuitively. What does it really mean to upgrade "dynamically"? Quick: do you have a turn-key plan for managing new dynamic communities? Do you have a scheme to become infinitely reconfigurable? The capability to implement virtually leads to the power to e-enable iteravely. If you innovate perfectly, you may have to empower nano-virally. Have you ever needed to benchmark your social-network-based, robust feature set? Instantly? What does the term "user-defined" really mean? Think customized. Think affiliate-based. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. Think customer-directed. The metrics for obfuscation management are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. The metrics for virtual, backward-compatible functionalities are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. What does it really mean to facilitate "interactively"? We realize that it is better to incentivize holistically than to reinvent virally. It sounds confounding, but it's accurate! What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the term "models" really mean? Think next-generation. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be cross-platform?