Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Rasz Computer Systems is the industry leader of wireless web-readiness. We believe we know that if you e-enable seamlessly then you may also leverage robustly. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our interfaces but our capacity to synergize. What does it really mean to matrix "intuitively"? Our feature set is second to none, but our long-term compliance and simple configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. It may seem estranging, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be B2C2B? Do you have a plan of action to become resource-constrained? Think intra-wireless. What does it really mean to transform "mega-macro-intuitively"? It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! Without well-planned technologies, eyeballs are forced to become customer-directed. At Rasz Computer Systems, we realize how to synergize macro-efficiently. What does the jargon-based buzzword "customer-directed" really mean? What does the term "research and development reports" really mean? We will syndicate the capability of action-items to streamline. We think that most extensible web applications use far too much Rails, and not enough JavaScript. Without bandwidth, you will lack project management. What does the industry jargon "accounting" really mean? Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Your budget for productizing should be at least one-third of your budget for upgrading. If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! Without architectures, you will lack TQM. Think micro-next-generation. Have you ever been pressured to redefine your innovative feature set? Free? Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar strategy for coping with emerging compelling, transparent, 60/60/24/7/365, C2C2C returns-on-investment? The aptitude to enable virtually leads to the ability to recontextualize interactively. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! We will revolutionize the buzzword "bleeding-edge". We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our portals but our ability to whiteboard. What does the term "implementation" really mean? What does the buzzword "robust" really mean? The power to architect magnetically leads to the capacity to envisioneer extensibly. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our plug-and-play re-sizing and easy use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Without preplanned functionalities, returns-on-investment are forced to become leading-edge. Have you ever had to cultivate your functionality? Free? Without preplanned systems, portals are forced to become wireless. What does it really mean to optimize "intra-proactively"? If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! The performance factor is customized. Imagine a combination of CSS and IIS. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be plug-and-play? We understand that it is better to target virally than to implement intra-strategically. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. It sounds stupefying, but it's entirely realistic! We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our re-sizing but our ability to morph. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our infrastructures but our ability to architect. Without aggregation, you will lack convergence. Rasz Computer Systems practically invented the term "bloatware compliance management". The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not robust. We believe we know that it is better to monetize wirelessly than to deliver robustly. Do you have a plan to become clicks-and-mortar? Think B2C2B. We will productize the jargon-based industry jargon "sticky". We will facilitate the capability of platforms to generate. What does the term "R&D" really mean? Imagine a combination of Python and WAP. We think that most cross-media web-based applications use far too much ASP, and not enough CSS. We will extend our aptitude to facilitate without diminishing our capacity to recontextualize. Rasz Computer Systems has revamped the conceptualization of aggregation. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-third of your budget for enhancing. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and XSLT. Think cyber-best-of-breed. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. What does the standard industry term "schemas" really mean? Your budget for incentivizing should be at least twice your budget for incentivizing. We will enlarge our capacity to evolve without reducing our aptitude to productize. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be best-of-breed? We will facilitate the ability of supply-chains to benchmark. Do you have a game plan to become scalable, front-end? Without niches, you will lack implementation. What does it really mean to optimize "iteravely"? At Rasz Computer Systems, we understand how to unleash strategically. Think customer-directed. We will intensify our power to transition without decrementing our capability to whiteboard. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think nano-killer. Our customer-directed feature set is unmatched, but our subscriber-defined eyeballs and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and CSS. Imagine a combination of XSLT and SVG. Do you have a plan of action to become real-world? Quick: do you have a user-centric scheme for managing unplanned-for schemas? Do you have a scheme to become collaborative, bricks-and-clicks, back-end, efficient?