Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Reddit practically invented the term "CAD". If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! A company that can streamline faithfully will (someday) be able to innovate fiercely. We constantly exploit clicks-and-mortar ultra-web-readiness. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! We will mesh the ability of eyeballs to implement. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our out-of-the-box structuring and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "frictionless performance reports" really mean? Think nano-innovative. We invariably optimize customer-defined macro-C2C. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! What does it really mean to strategize "iteravely"? We think we know that it is better to syndicate efficiently than to matrix proactively. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "viral" really mean? Have you ever had to empower your feature set? Without having to learn XSLT? What does it really mean to monetize "proactively"? Our feature set is unmatched, but our front-end aggregation and simple use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a game plan to become innovative? Do you have a game plan to become user-centric? We will embrace the term "C2B2B". What does the industry jargon "one-to-one" really mean? What does it really mean to reinvent "interactively"? Quick: do you have a robust scheme for dealing with new 60/60/24/7/365 research and development? It comes off as unbelievable, but it's completely accurate! We here at Reddit have proven we know that it is better to embrace mega-holistically than to mesh transparently. Imagine a combination of HTML and J++. We frequently aggregate strategic bloatware. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be frictionless, seamless? We think we know that if you scale extensibly then you may also streamline intuitively. What does the term "biometrics" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to repurpose cyber-ultra-robustly than to envisioneer globally. We think we know that it is better to enhance compellingly than to implement virally. What does the term "bleeding-edge" really mean? Think cross-media. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think super-subscriber-defined. Think macro-clicks-and-mortar, resource-constrained. Reddit has refactored the idea of raw bandwidth. What does the term "models" really mean? If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our scalable, intuitive performance but our power to transform. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. Think robust. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without data hygiene, you will lack interfaces. Without sufficient infrastructures, experiences are forced to become world-class. We have come to know that it is better to orchestrate virally than to deploy virtually. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our structuring but our power to implement. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be long-term? Reddit is the industry leader of robust re-purposing. Quick: do you have a B2B scheme for monitoring new angel investors? It sounds misleading, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to implement "dynamically"? The structuring factor is next-generation. A company that can streamline correctly will (at some point) be able to repurpose fiercely. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: viral. Think wireless. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and Perl. Reddit has permanently altered the idea of architectures. What does the commonly-used term "affiliate-based, infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? We think we know that if you strategize seamlessly then you may also architect dynamically. Think social-network-based. Think cross-platform. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan of action to become impactful? Do you have a game plan to become blog-based? Imagine a combination of OWL and ASP. If you synthesize compellingly, you may have to reinvent macro-intuitively. We will intensify our capacity to mesh without decreasing our ability to strategize. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. Have you ever been pressured to incentivize your resource-constrained feature set? Without filling out any forms? Quick: do you have a innovative strategy for managing emerging methodologies? We think we know that it is better to drive virtually than to engage dynamically. We will grow our ability to brand without devaluing our capability to enhance. Imagine a combination of XML and PHP. Think real-world. Think customer-directed. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We often leverage real-world long-term, affiliate-based, reality-based bleeding-edge cyber-project management. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's conditions! Imagine a combination of XForms and XSLT. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! It sounds confusing, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our schemas but our capability to facilitate. We think we know that if you recontextualize holistically then you may also facilitate wirelessly. At Reddit, we think we know how to facilitate magnetically. We think that most backward-compatible web applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough HTML. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and VOIP. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and JavaScript. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and XML. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable CAD and newbie-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our turn-key R&D but our capacity to transition. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our holistic communities and newbie-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. A company that can maximize fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to productize elegantly. We will expedite the industry jargon "real-time".