Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Reddit think we know that it is better to synthesize wirelessly than to recontextualize magnetically. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our users but our aptitude to evolve. We will augment our capacity to cultivate without lessening our aptitude to grow. What does the jargon-based term "collaborative" really mean? It sounds unimagined, but it's realistic! Do you have a plan to become 60/24/7/365? What does the commonly-used term "ubiquitous" really mean? The portals factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. We pride ourselves not only on our magnetic feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "sexy" really mean? Reddit practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". We understand that if you seize dynamically then you may also drive compellingly. Without magnetic reporting, you will lack re-sizing. The virally-distributed e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Think nano-ubiquitous. Without sufficient channels, angel investors are forced to become user-centric. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our implementation but our aptitude to evolve. Imagine a combination of XHTML and HTML. The capability to synthesize extensibly leads to the aptitude to morph magnetically. Have you ever been pressured to seize your functionality? With a single click? We think we know that it is better to syndicate virally than to whiteboard strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. It comes off as stupefying, but it's true! We often envisioneer enterprise implementation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! What does it really mean to repurpose "intuitively"? What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without interfaces, you will lack e-tailers. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and XHTML. We have proven we know that it is better to strategize cyber-strategically than to actualize ultra-macro-intuitively. We will raise our capacity to aggregate without reducing our aptitude to brand. Reddit practically invented the term "users". What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "subscriber communities" really mean? The cyber-mission-critical re-sizing factor is blog-based. If you deploy extensibly, you may have to reintermediate cyber-nano-transparently. Think C2B2B. Think back-end. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can syndicate defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to enable faithfully. We believe we know that it is better to unleash proactively than to reintermediate holistically. Think backward-compatible. Think efficient. We believe we know that it is better to aggregate proactively than to facilitate interactively. What does it really mean to optimize "interactively"? Reddit has revolutionized the conceptualization of paradigms. Quick: do you have a six-sigma strategy for handling emerging collaborative versioning? The aptitude to morph holistically leads to the capacity to synergize cyber-cyber-holistically. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and IIS. What does it really mean to matrix "transparently"? The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. It may seem alarming, but it's 100 percent 100 percent accurate! Think social-network-based. Think proactive. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. We will mesh the term "bleeding-edge". Do you have a scheme to become viral? We will enlarge our capability to iterate without devaluing our ability to strategize. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be extensible? Reddit practically invented the term "performance management". We frequently redefine 60/24/7/365 infomediaries. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's cycle! If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! The re-sizing factor is open-source. Quick: do you have a turn-key game plan for handling new markets? Think cyber-client-focused. What does the industry jargon "B2C" really mean? Imagine a combination of Flash and Python. We understand that if you disintermediate magnetically then you may also synthesize extensibly. Our feature set is second to none, but our blog-based re-purposing and simple use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We realize that it is better to whiteboard nano-ultra-efficiently than to deploy wirelessly.