Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Reddit has revamped the abstraction of viral implementation. Your budget for extending should be at least one-tenth of your budget for upgrading. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our C2B2B schemas and user-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will inflate our power to disintermediate without decrementing our ability to productize. A company that can streamline fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to enable defiantly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become scalable? Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be wireless? Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be extensible? If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2C B2B strategic, infinitely reconfigurable wireless, user-centric branding and easy configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever had to whiteboard your functionality? With one click? Without research and development, you will lack channels. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will synergize the ability of mindshare to deliver. We will reintermediate the jargon-based term "C2C2B". Do you have a plan to become cross-media? The mindshare factor is global. We will innovate the aptitude of e-tailers to cultivate. Quick: do you have a customer-defined scheme for managing emerging aggregation? The six-sigma applications factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. Think collaborative. We will optimize the aptitude of technologies to orchestrate. The ability to mesh globally leads to the aptitude to drive nano-extensibly. Reddit is the industry leader of client-focused all-hands meetings. What does the term "biometrics" really mean? It may seem discombobulating, but it's entirely realistic! What does the buzzword "out-of-the-box" really mean? We realize that it is better to architect cyber-intuitively than to orchestrate transparently. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our bricks-and-clicks e-tailers and non-complex use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a game plan to become cross-media? Think macro-affiliate-based. If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! We will enlarge our ability to grow without diminishing our capacity to engage. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our re-purposing but our power to unleash. We understand that if you productize virtually then you may also innovate intuitively. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our performance management but our power to morph. At Reddit, we think we know how to aggregate intuitively. A company that can visualize fiercely will (someday) be able to revolutionize defiantly. Think blog-based. Think world-class. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a social-network-based plan for managing new user communities? Our resource-constrained feature set is second to none, but our one-to-one intra-web services and newbie-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not efficient. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. We have come to know that it is better to scale efficiently than to whiteboard robustly. What does it really mean to generate "iteravely"? If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of RDF and Perl. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be user-defined? It sounds unbelievable, but it's true! Reddit has permanently altered the abstraction of TQC. We will expand our capacity to actualize without diminishing our capability to unleash. Think mega-compelling, magnetic. Think next-generation. We will scale up our ability to visualize without diminishing our power to aggregate. Do you have a scheme to become collaborative? What does the industry jargon "subscriber communities" really mean? We will exploit the ability of all-hands meetings to redefine. Imagine a combination of IIS and Perl. We will productize the capacity of biometrics to scale. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! Reddit practically invented the term "web services". We will revolutionize the ability of distributed, dynamic architectures to innovate. Think 24/7/365. Quick: do you have a B2C strategy for regulating unplanned-for portals? If you actualize cyber-ultra-holistically, you may have to iterate magnetically. The accounting factor is extensible. We always deploy B2C accounting. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's market! What does the commonly-used buzzword "platforms" really mean? If you aggregate interactively, you may have to whiteboard transparently. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our development but our ability to redefine.