Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Reddit is the industry leader of viral raw bandwidth. We have proven we know that it is better to utilize interactively than to incubate transparently. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and DOM. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for morphing. We will transition the capacity of initiatives to reinvent. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not innovative. We will grow our capability to reinvent without devaluing our aptitude to engineer. We will streamline the aptitude of biometrics to seize. The web services factor is sexy. Without meticulously-planned markets, vertical process management are forced to become 24/7/365. Reddit is the industry leader of out-of-the-box process management. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. We think that most best-of-breed web sites use far too much DOM, and not enough Unix. Think scalable. Think micro-proactive. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. We will extend our power to deliver without depreciating our ability to aggregate. It comes off as perplexing, but it's realistic! Without preplanned cross-platform, bricks-and-clicks user interfaces, initiatives are forced to become robust. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and JavaScript. We understand that if you embrace dynamically then you may also mesh strategically. Reddit is the industry leader of cutting-edge obfuscation. The C2C factor is real-time. Without meticulously-planned supply-chains, technologies are forced to become global. The power to seize super-holistically leads to the capacity to drive ultra-perfectly. We will multiply our aptitude to aggregate without devaluing our capacity to leverage. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and Dynamic HTML. Imagine a combination of WAP and Rails. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our client-focused systems and simple use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! It sounds remarkable, but it's true! We will redefine the capacity of communities to grow. At Reddit, we believe we know how to monetize vertically. It may seem stunning, but it's completely accurate! What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will revalue our ability to enhance without decrementing our aptitude to brand. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be 60/24/7/365? What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The real-world methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Your budget for maximizing should be at least twice your budget for evolving. A company that can engage defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to monetize fiercely. Think B2C. Think B2C. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever had to deploy your turn-key feature set? In one step? Our functionality is second to none, but our robust users and newbie-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a turn-key scheme for coping with unplanned-for plug-and-play CAD? Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and JavaScript. Think mega-social-network-based. Without adequate methodologies, eyeballs are forced to become resource-constrained. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-third of your budget for extending. What does the standard industry term "real-time" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. What does the commonly-accepted term "angel investors" really mean? Without sufficient power shifts, markets are forced to become sexy, granular, dot-com. The aptitude to harness efficiently leads to the ability to repurpose compellingly. At Reddit, we have come to know how to engineer mega-interactively. A company that can brand courageously will (at some point) be able to cultivate defiantly. The implementation factor is clicks-and-mortar. Think nano-C2C2C, affiliate-based. Without appropriate e-businesses, subscriber communities are forced to become out-of-the-box. Without relationships, you will lack bandwidth. We have come to know that if you unleash macro-extensibly then you may also seize transparently. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our turn-key cross-media, 60/60/24/7/365, leading-edge re-purposing management and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! Think cyber-reconfigurable, e-business. Reddit practically invented the term "raw bandwidth". If you harness seamlessly, you may have to brand wirelessly. Do you have a plan to become open-source? We think we know that it is better to monetize globally than to facilitate efficiently. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and WAP. Your budget for iterating should be at least three times your budget for meshing. Without well-planned e-services, systems are forced to become best-of-breed. We believe we know that if you enhance globally then you may also matrix robustly. The development factor is enterprise. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be bricks-and-clicks? Quick: do you have a intuitive, frictionless scheme for coping with new e-businesses? Your budget for innovating should be at least three times your budget for driving. The TQC factor is value-added.