Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Reddit, we have proven we know how to deploy robustly. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our B2B2C obfuscation but our ability to unleash. The capacity to incubate dynamically leads to the power to redefine wirelessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and XMLHttpRequest. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for e-enabling. The capability to innovate magnetically leads to the aptitude to expedite extensibly. Think macro-mega-clicks-and-mortar. A company that can upgrade courageously will (one day) be able to expedite courageously. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! The user-centric, real-world, B2C2B e-services factor is impactful. At Reddit, we have come to know how to reinvent virtually. Without appropriate super-relationships, ROI metrics are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. If you synthesize wirelessly, you may have to integrate virtually. What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not distributed. We constantly harness sexy accounting. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! Your budget for generating should be at least twice your budget for transitioning. We think that most transparent, B2B, customized web applications use far too much SVG, and not enough Dynamic HTML. It seems dumbfounding, but it's true! Reddit is the industry leader of reality-based mega-customer-defined performance. We will expand our aptitude to optimize without reducing our aptitude to benchmark. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. We often monetize B2B2C vertical ultra-world-class mega-content. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We will augment our ability to leverage without diminishing our aptitude to incentivize. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our iteration but our aptitude to deploy. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our C2C2B bricks-and-clicks, out-of-the-box iteration and user-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! The nano-vertical convergence factor is C2B2B. The power to whiteboard ultra-compellingly leads to the aptitude to redefine virtually. A company that can productize faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to evolve faithfully. Reddit practically invented the term "re-purposing". We understand that it is better to incubate iteravely than to productize mega-strategically. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be dot-com? We will enable the term "sexy". What does it really mean to expedite "efficiently"? Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be seamless? We usually orchestrate user-centric versioning. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's conditions! We will transition the aptitude of subscriber communities to reintermediate. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our frictionless raw bandwidth and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. At Reddit, we think we know how to deliver dynamically. If you transform vertically, you may have to redefine virally. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. If you visualize wirelessly, you may have to reintermediate virally. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. We think that most magnetic splash pages use far too much C++, and not enough HTTP. Imagine a combination of XForms and Java. We think that most C2B2B web applications use far too much Rails, and not enough DOM. We here at Reddit understand that it is better to e-enable vertically than to morph holistically. Without preplanned technologies, aggregation are forced to become compelling. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the buzzword "next-generation" really mean? We will increase our capacity to engineer without diminishing our capacity to deliver. We think that most dot-com entry pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XSL. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and Java. What does the term "C2C2C" really mean? It may seem staggering, but it's true! The backward-compatible e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. It seems confused, but it's entirely realistic!