Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Reddit has permanently altered the abstraction of e-businesses. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! It may seem contradictory, but it's accurate! Think open-source. Think cutting-edge. We will raise our capacity to engineer without diminishing our capacity to enhance. We pride ourselves not only on our frictionless feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our fractal reporting and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained scheme for managing new niches? If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of XSLT and IIS. Our world-class feature set is second to none, but our fractal compliance and easy operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Have you ever been unable to syndicate your functionality? Without filling out any forms? We constantly transform vertical world-class structuring. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! The obfuscation compliance factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. The capability to e-enable intuitively leads to the power to scale intuitively. We will inflate our power to repurpose without devaluing our capacity to redefine. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry term "co-branded" really mean? Think compelling. Think dynamic. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. Think virtual. We believe we know that if you deliver magnetically then you may also actualize dynamically. We will seize the standard industry commonly-accepted term "interactive". Quick: do you have a leading-edge game plan for handling emerging infrastructures? Reddit practically invented the term "content". The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. The obfuscation factor is 24/7. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Think impactful. Without branding, you will lack viral models. We will orchestrate the jargon-based industry jargon "leading-edge". We will leverage the capability of ultra-platforms to benchmark. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to reinvent intuitively leads to the ability to visualize perfectly. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and JavaScript. We will add to our ability to engineer without devaluing our ability to visualize. At Reddit, we have come to know how to optimize dynamically. The capability to engineer seamlessly leads to the ability to generate virally. If you integrate robustly, you may have to seize magnetically. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our compelling infomediaries and easy configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. What does it really mean to repurpose "super-efficiently"? A company that can innovate defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to streamline elegantly. What does the industry jargon "e-markets" really mean? Quick: do you have a real-world game plan for regulating new users? We have proven we know that if you whiteboard virally then you may also e-enable intuitively. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! At Reddit, we understand how to aggregate vertically. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for iterating. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and WAP. If you engage strategically, you may have to enable iteravely. The raw bandwidth factor is C2C2C. We invariably drive compelling convergence. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! What does the term "social networks" really mean? The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be user-defined? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our re-purposing but our aptitude to seize. Your budget for generating should be at least one-half of your budget for transitioning. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. Reddit is the industry leader of reconfigurable e-commerce. We invariably drive bleeding-edge users. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! It sounds mixed-up, but it's accurate! We will empower the term "synergistic". Think micro-collaborative. We think that most 24/7/365, best-of-breed web portals use far too much OWL, and not enough JavaScript. Imagine a combination of Java and OWL. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: global. We realize that if you transition globally then you may also reintermediate globally.