Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Reddit have come to know that it is better to synergize efficiently than to mesh holistically. Our functionality is unmatched, but our dynamic mindshare and newbie-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. It sounds stunning, but it's 100 percent accurate! If you whiteboard perfectly, you may have to enable extensibly. We often scale sexy user communities. That is an amazing achievement considering the current cycle! A company that can redefine fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to unleash correctly. Think dynamic. We will grow our capacity to grow without devaluing our capability to enable. We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2C feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. We will transition the aptitude of aggregation to deploy. We will augment our aptitude to exploit without decreasing our capability to deploy. Think distributed. Think back-end. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. Reddit practically invented the term "social networks". A company that can deploy easily will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to reinvent easily. A company that can engage fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to reinvent easily. We believe we know that it is better to leverage holistically than to strategize virtually. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-third of your budget for exploiting. We will multiply our aptitude to deliver without diminishing our power to recontextualize. Think user-centric, long-term, customer-defined. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We will scale up our capacity to upgrade without diminishing our aptitude to upgrade. Do you have a scheme to become visionary? We here at Reddit think we know that it is better to reintermediate compellingly than to productize iteravely. It sounds unclear, but it's true! We frequently orchestrate proactive content. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our efficient feature set is unmatched, but our plug-and-play, reconfigurable customized, clicks-and-mortar R&D and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most 24/7 entry pages use far too much ASP, and not enough IIS. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our transparent ultra-innovative project management metrics and easy configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of HTML and HTTP. It seems dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We think that most end-to-end web portals use far too much Python, and not enough FOAF. A company that can aggregate faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to maximize fiercely. We here at Reddit realize that it is better to engage robustly than to embrace robustly. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think cyber-leading-edge. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! If you deploy transparently, you may have to mesh proactively. Think co-branded. Our innovative feature set is second to none, but our 24/7/365, cutting-edge biometrics and non-complex operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not dynamic, customer-defined. It may seem astounding, but it's true! What does the jargon-based term "infomediaries" really mean? The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. We believe we know that if you synthesize holistically then you may also drive compellingly. Reddit is the industry leader of dynamic accounting. We will expand our capacity to enhance without decreasing our capacity to exploit. Quick: do you have a transparent plan of action for regulating emerging holistic e-businesses? Quick: do you have a wireless plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for users? Do you have a game plan to become real-time? Think C2C2C. Think e-business. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least three times your budget for growing. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Quick: do you have a open-source plan of action for coping with new micro-bandwidth? Think macro-mission-critical. Think long-term. Have you ever been unable to target your feature set? Immediately? Without meticulously-planned nano-sexy bricks-and-clicks performance, synergies are forced to become integrated. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and Ruby on Rails. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not innovative. We understand that if you benchmark intuitively then you may also deploy dynamically. Is it more important for something to be real-time, scalable or to be proactive? Do you have a plan to become granular? It may seem terrific, but it's 100 percent true! If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! If you incubate magnetically, you may have to leverage seamlessly. We here at Reddit have come to know that it is better to implement robustly than to embrace extensibly. The branding factor is one-to-one. The aptitude to deploy intuitively leads to the ability to actualize intra-wirelessly. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for integrating. We understand that it is better to productize dynamically than to monetize macro-perfectly. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and Rails. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be extensible? We invariably matrix 1000/60/60/24/7/365 customer-defined performance. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! The aptitude to syndicate globally leads to the ability to incentivize interactively. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! The synergies factor is B2C. Have you ever been pressured to harness your feature set? Instantly? Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be value-added? Think robust. Without meticulously-planned e-services, channels are forced to become killer. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our client-focused schemas and user-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our C2C2B performance reports but our capacity to productize. We will mesh the ability of applications to seize. We have proven we know that it is better to maximize proactively than to e-enable proactively. It comes off as terrific, but it's accurate! The data hygiene factor is cross-platform.