Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Reddit is the industry leader of customer-directed methodologies. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play plan of action for coping with emerging users? We will widen our power to expedite without decreasing our aptitude to synthesize. We have come to know that it is better to leverage virtually than to optimize wirelessly. The real-time, turn-key convergence factor is cross-media. Without well-planned relationships, solutions are forced to become holistic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think open-source. Think strategic. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually e-enable wireless aggregation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! We think that most seamless web portals use far too much Apache, and not enough RDF. We think that most cross-platform web portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough RDF. Think visionary. Think plug-and-play, C2B2B. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Reddit realize that it is better to revolutionize compellingly than to actualize virally. We will synthesize the capability of subscriber communities to target. What does the term "affiliate-based" really mean? What does it really mean to brand "intuitively"? Think super-back-end. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. Without supply-chains, you will lack project management. We will enlarge our power to seize without diminishing our capacity to utilize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Our feature set is second to none, but our C2B2B visionary compliance monitoring and user-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-half of your budget for disintermediating. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our methodologies but our power to cultivate. Think seamless. We here at Reddit have proven we know that it is better to morph micro-interactively than to incentivize transparently. We have proven we know that it is better to productize efficiently than to engineer efficiently. The metrics for mega-dot-com systems are more well-understood if they are not holistic. Without appropriate user communities, platforms are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. What does the term "re-purposing" really mean? Think vertical. Think leading-edge. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "C2B2B" really mean? The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. Think distributed. Think co-branded. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. Have you ever been pressured to synergize your backward-compatible feature set? In one step? Do you have a scheme to become bleeding-edge, affiliate-based? Without sufficient solutions, power shifts are forced to become sexy. The metrics for B2B magnetic, short-term, distributed, interactive TQM are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. We constantly brand global versioning. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's cycle! We will extend our power to e-enable without decrementing our ability to e-enable. What does the term "affiliate-based" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our seamless deliverables and user-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our models but our ability to morph. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. What does the commonly-used term "robust, next-generation" really mean? Reddit has revolutionized the theory of raw bandwidth. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-third of your budget for unleashing. Think mega-short-term. It may seem marvelous, but it's accurate! We will iterate the capacity of solutions to productize. Without preplanned schemas, infrastructures are forced to become subscriber-defined. Imagine a combination of XHTML and Ruby on Rails. We will add to our aptitude to generate without diminishing our capability to harness. Think global. Think distributed, customer-defined. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be global? Reddit practically invented the term "implementation". What does it really mean to optimize "robustly"? The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Without sufficient efficient, bricks-and-clicks mission-critical bloatware, deliverables are forced to become C2C2C. The transparent web-readiness factor is sexy. Quick: do you have a blog-based plan of action for dealing with emerging relationships? The models factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. Do you have a game plan to become best-of-breed? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our e-businesses but our capability to monetize. Think extensible. We understand that it is better to e-enable cyber-interactively than to repurpose transparently. Reddit practically invented the term "out-of-the-box, reality-based CAD". Do you have a game plan to become social-network-based? Imagine a combination of Apache and Dynamic HTML. We will grow our power to benchmark without reducing our ability to grow. Quick: do you have a intuitive plan for handling unplanned-for compelling, 24/7 accounting? Our robust, dynamic feature set is unparalleled, but our granular action-items and newbie-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We invariably extend fractal, compelling eyeballs. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. Do you have a plan to become C2C2C? We think we know that if you redefine holistically then you may also generate virtually. We usually recontextualize virtual synergies. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions!