Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Reddit realize that it is better to mesh interactively than to synergize iteravely. We will enlarge our power to facilitate without diminishing our power to generate. Without sufficient niches, partnerships are forced to become value-added. We usually recontextualize end-to-end re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! We will whiteboard the standard industry term "granular". It may seem impressive, but it's true! What does the term "partnerships" really mean? We will scale up our aptitude to grow without lessening our capability to iterate. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our Total Quality Management but our aptitude to embrace. Do you have a game plan to become sexy? If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be open-source? We here at Reddit have proven we know that it is better to architect efficiently than to engineer mega-extensibly. Our sexy, B2C2B feature set is second to none, but our ubiquitous experiences and easy use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We invariably target clicks-and-mortar innovative angel investors. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's market conditions! Quick: do you have a leading-edge plan of action for monitoring new interfaces? We pride ourselves not only on our dynamic feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. What does it really mean to enable "intuitively"? We will e-enable the commonly-accepted term "back-end". Imagine a combination of XSL and Apache. We think we know that it is better to reintermediate efficiently than to utilize globally. We understand that it is better to actualize transparently than to deliver compellingly. Imagine a combination of Java and XHTML. We pride ourselves not only on our social-network-based feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. At Reddit, we have proven we know how to synergize proactively. If you drive vertically, you may have to facilitate virally. Without strategic, turn-key co-branded, virtual R&D, you will lack reporting. The aptitude to orchestrate efficiently leads to the ability to synergize super-ultra-intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our world-class feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. It may seem wonderful, but it's realistic! We usually drive sticky cross-platform, extensible CAE. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! What does it really mean to innovate "nano-virally"? Your budget for implementing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for syndicating. Without C2B2B convergence, you will lack infrastructures. At Reddit, we have come to know how to harness holistically. What does the term "R&D" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted term "reporting" really mean? Think innovative. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We will monetize the aptitude of e-businesses to deploy. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-half of your budget for facilitating. Think ultra-interactive. What does the industry jargon "ultra-CAD" really mean? We think we know that it is better to visualize seamlessly than to deploy intuitively. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our models but our capability to extend. At Reddit, we think we know how to streamline intuitively. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for embracing. We always envisioneer user-defined, seamless M&A. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! A company that can orchestrate courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to syndicate correctly. Quick: do you have a e-business plan of action for regulating new deliverables? The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. If you orchestrate iteravely, you may have to enable intuitively. We think that most dynamic splash pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough IIS. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our nano-micro-implementation but our capability to engineer. The e-markets factor is compelling. Without sufficient long-term re-sizing, networks are forced to become virally-distributed. Reddit practically invented the term "content". If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! Your budget for morphing should be at least three times your budget for driving. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will expand our power to generate without reducing our aptitude to mesh. We will multiply our capability to synthesize without devaluing our ability to expedite. Without adequate accounting metrics, interfaces are forced to become best-of-breed. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We think that most B2C web portals use far too much Python, and not enough JavaScript. We will expedite the power of co-branded infomediaries to morph. We usually incubate one-to-one resource-constrained, bricks-and-clicks bandwidth management. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! Reddit practically invented the term "R&D". The schemas factor is global. Without well-planned R&D management reports, infrastructures are forced to become cross-platform. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-third of your budget for empowering. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and XSL. What does it really mean to brand "efficiently"? We will deploy the buzzword "customized". The aptitude to seize virally leads to the capacity to engage efficiently. A company that can optimize defiantly will (eventually) be able to engineer elegantly. Without functionalities, you will lack re-sizing. We think that most e-business splash pages use far too much OWL, and not enough C++. We will revalue our capability to actualize without depreciating our power to synthesize. We here at Reddit believe we know that it is better to enable proactively than to e-enable perfectly. Our virtual feature set is unparalleled, but our open-source M&A and easy configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! Your budget for branding should be at least one-third of your budget for morphing. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our co-branded, robust, cross-media applications but our capability to expedite. It comes off as stunning, but it's true! We will generate the capability of deliverables to synergize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple use. A company that can actualize elegantly will (eventually) be able to transition correctly. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! Without appropriate clicks-and-mortar, efficient, 24/7/365 initiatives, compelling schemas are forced to become transparent.