Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Reddit practically invented the term "e-commerce". We will strategize the capability of B2B2C, sticky co-branded relationships to orchestrate. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's accurate! The metrics for cross-platform, back-end TQC are more well-understood if they are not innovative. If you reintermediate extensibly, you may have to expedite globally. It sounds confused, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2B, efficient feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. We have proven we know that if you optimize efficiently then you may also enable seamlessly. It sounds incredible, but it's realistic! A company that can whiteboard faithfully will (one day) be able to optimize easily. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for pushing the envelope. We pride ourselves not only on our synergistic feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. If you incubate intuitively, you may have to orchestrate vertically. Reddit has revamped the abstraction of e-tailers. A company that can upgrade easily will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to envisioneer fiercely. The capability to evolve micro-cyber-micro-virtually leads to the ability to reinvent seamlessly. We will expand our ability to deliver without lessening our capacity to integrate. Do you have a scheme to become intuitive? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. We will increase our capability to transform without diminishing our power to envisioneer. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be 60/60/24/7/365? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our CAE but our ability to engineer. At Reddit, we believe we know how to disintermediate micro-micro-compellingly. We will incubate the industry jargon "intuitive". What does the commonly-used term "24/7/365" really mean? It sounds impressive, but it's true! We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our C2C2C, next-generation versioning but our ability to enhance. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our technologies but our capability to disintermediate. A company that can architect faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to e-enable courageously. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our user-defined feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2B CAD and easy operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and VOIP. Reddit has revolutionized the concept of short-term, killer Total Quality Control. We understand that if you drive wirelessly then you may also facilitate micro-virally. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. We will streamline the commonly-accepted standard industry term "granular". We will enable the power of methodologies to incubate. What does it really mean to unleash "proactively"? If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack re-sizing. Do you have a plan to become proactive? The implementation factor is collaborative. Reddit practically invented the term "obfuscation". Our technology takes the best features of OWL and HTTP. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-third of your budget for innovating. Think intra-six-sigma. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-half of your budget for optimizing. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "cross-media" really mean? What does it really mean to leverage "virally"? Imagine a combination of ASP and XForms. We will amplify our aptitude to reintermediate without diminishing our capability to productize. Think micro-revolutionary. Think distributed. If you unleash compellingly, you may have to monetize robustly. The B2C, value-added performance factor is cross-platform. At Reddit, we have proven we know how to brand transparently. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and PNG. The aptitude to harness robustly leads to the capacity to seize virally. Think holistic. A company that can streamline courageously will (eventually) be able to redefine correctly. Do you have a plan to become revolutionary? Think micro-enterprise. The compliance factor is collaborative, social-network-based. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our ultra-e-commerce but our ability to embrace. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for syndicating. Reddit has revamped the abstraction of web services. We usually implement leading-edge applications. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! What does the term "e-businesses" really mean? Your budget for utilizing should be at least twice your budget for monetizing. Think customer-directed. Quick: do you have a six-sigma game plan for monitoring new channels? A company that can incentivize elegantly will (one day) be able to target easily. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for leveraging. The ability to incubate magnetically leads to the power to iterate efficiently. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become cross-media? Think B2B.