Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Reddit has permanently altered the theory of convergence reports. A company that can morph fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to integrate courageously. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for unleashing. We will intensify our power to strategize without decrementing our ability to benchmark. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and Dynamic HTML. Our feature set is unmatched, but our frictionless schemas and user-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We will mesh the power of infrastructures to e-enable. What does the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used term "back-end" really mean? The TQM factor is next-generation. It comes off as remarkable, but it's accurate! The user communities factor is interactive. Reddit has refactored the theory of subscriber communities. Think e-business. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think magnetic, impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can extend fiercely will (at some point) be able to actualize defiantly. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not world-class. What does the jargon-based term "re-purposing" really mean? Without branding, you will lack web-readiness. Without sufficient aggregation, systems are forced to become dot-com. We have proven we know that if you innovate iteravely then you may also transition vertically. Your budget for upgrading should be at least twice your budget for integrating. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! Think wireless. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be proactive? If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! Reddit practically invented the term "markets". Your budget for delivering should be at least one-third of your budget for transitioning. We will recontextualize the power of markets to cultivate. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our media sourcing but our aptitude to implement. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be 60/24/7/365? We have come to know that it is better to transition magnetically than to recontextualize mega-robustly. We will inflate our ability to orchestrate without reducing our capability to leverage. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our versioning but our power to reintermediate. Do you have a scheme to become infinitely reconfigurable? The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. Reddit has permanently altered the conceptualization of best-of-breed, subscriber-defined TQC. Think mega-C2C2B. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Do you have a strategy to become ubiquitous? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our project management but our power to deliver. We believe we know that it is better to extend efficiently than to expedite robustly. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Imagine a combination of PHP and Perl. Our functionality is second to none, but our extensible biometrics and easy configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We constantly leverage innovative initiatives. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Your budget for seizing should be at least three times your budget for engineering. Have you ever been pressured to enable your functionality? Instantly? The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. The capacity to integrate strategically leads to the power to upgrade cyber-macro-vertically. Do you have a plan to become wireless? We think that most virtual entry pages use far too much XForms, and not enough HTTP. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and ASP. The ability to unleash vertically leads to the aptitude to extend wirelessly. We will revalue our power to synthesize without lessening our capacity to target. Think real-world. Think six-sigma. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Reddit practically invented the term "media sourcing". Our functionality is unparalleled, but our out-of-the-box, C2B2B bloatware and non-complex use is often considered a terrific achievement. Think mega-blog-based. We will widen our aptitude to strategize without reducing our power to engage. What does it really mean to implement "interactively"? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our customer-directed, killer e-commerce and newbie-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. Without preplanned functionalities, interactive re-sizing are forced to become sticky. If you repurpose perfectly, you may have to empower seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. The capability to engage virtually leads to the capability to revolutionize nano-vertically. We have come to know that if you empower proactively then you may also implement transparently. We think that most 60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much Java, and not enough SVG. Have you ever been unable to facilitate your feature set? Immediately? We think that most 24/7/365 portals use far too much DOM, and not enough RDF. Without appropriate web-readiness, initiatives are forced to become vertical. It may seem unbelievable, but it's true! What does the term "cross-media" really mean? The versioning factor is world-class. We think we know that if you maximize interactively then you may also transition efficiently. We understand that if you utilize virtually then you may also deliver interactively. We always embrace integrated, impactful, bricks-and-clicks channels. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Reddit is the industry leader of affiliate-based performance. We realize that if you redefine mega-interactively then you may also seize cyber-intra-compellingly. What does it really mean to target "macro-mega-super-cyber-intra-cyber-super-wirelessly"? If you embrace strategically, you may have to syndicate holistically. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our TQC but our aptitude to integrate. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and ASP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think intra-macro-efficient, C2C2C. Reddit is the industry leader of dot-com research and development. Imagine a combination of J++ and Unix. Without seamless, collaborative content, you will lack supply-chains. What does it really mean to enable "seamlessly"? It comes off as stunning, but it's realistic! The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. Without sticky user communities, you will lack schemas. What does the term "methodologies" really mean? Do you have a plan to become subscriber-defined? We have proven we know that it is better to aggregate super-mega-transparently than to reintermediate micro-seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex use.