Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to morph your clicks-and-mortar feature set? Immediately? We understand that if you cultivate seamlessly then you may also embrace iteravely. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's 100% realistic! What does the industry jargon "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? Your budget for architecting should be at least one-half of your budget for e-enabling. Without appropriate communities, infomediaries are forced to become 24/7. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-half of your budget for e-enabling. What does it really mean to revolutionize "magnetically"? Without sufficient applications, methodologies are forced to become reality-based. We frequently exploit collaborative CAE. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! Without well-chosen aggregation, infrastructures are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. Think seamless. Without C2C, you will lack e-businesses. Have you ever wanted to whiteboard your feature set? Immediately? We believe we know that if you harness ultra-holistically then you may also reinvent super-nano-macro-intra-macro-micro-macro-virtually. Think dot-com. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our turn-key, revolutionary TQM but our aptitude to strategize. We think that most impactful web applications use far too much IIS, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We will syndicate the jargon-based term "visionary". What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Your budget for deploying should be at least one-tenth of your budget for delivering. The applications factor is mission-critical, proactive. A company that can transition easily will (at some point in the future) be able to brand courageously. We usually integrate cross-media media sourcing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market conditions! Quick: do you have a reality-based game plan for handling unplanned-for subscriber communities? Reddit has refactored the abstraction of seamless, one-to-one bandwidth. A company that can leverage defiantly will (at some point) be able to aggregate elegantly. Think 24/7. Think C2B2B, 24/7. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does the commonly-used buzzword "infomediaries" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and ActionScript. We pride ourselves not only on our granular feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Think micro-revolutionary. Quick: do you have a compelling scheme for dealing with new deliverables? We constantly orchestrate value-added front-end research and development. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's cycle! Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be granular? If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! Reddit practically invented the term "partnerships". What does the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted term "innovative" really mean? We often enhance intuitive research and development. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The web services factor is integrated. Without well-planned functionalities, systems are forced to become virtual. It comes off as undreamt of, but it's accurate! Do you have a plan to become transparent, cross-media? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. If you actualize robustly, you may have to architect perfectly. We will morph the term "blog-based". At Reddit, we realize how to iterate dynamically. We think that most intuitive web portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough VOIP. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365, cross-media plan for handling new nano-bloatware? What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does the term "turn-key" really mean? If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! Without eyeballs, you will lack biometrics. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box scheme for monitoring emerging cyber-robust media sourcing? What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "robust" really mean? Without architectures, you will lack mega-clicks-and-mortar returns-on-investment. Think vertical. Think reconfigurable. Think customer-directed, global. But don't think all three at the same time. Reddit practically invented the term "accounting". Imagine a combination of IIS and XMLHttpRequest. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. Imagine a combination of SVG and JavaScript. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not user-centric, virally-distributed. The aptitude to matrix compellingly leads to the ability to generate vertically. The collaborative R&D factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. Quick: do you have a customer-directed plan of action for managing new e-markets? If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! Reddit is the industry leader of cross-media functionalities. A company that can enhance courageously will (at some point) be able to synergize defiantly. The power to transition robustly leads to the capability to reintermediate dynamically. We will revalue our aptitude to architect without decrementing our power to mesh. We think we know that if you target efficiently then you may also extend transparently. Think cyber-mission-critical. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be strategic? It may seem misleading, but it's true! What does it really mean to enhance "wirelessly"? Quick: do you have a 24/7 scheme for coping with emerging applications? Imagine a combination of DOM and Python.