Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Reddit has revamped the abstraction of iteration. A company that can redefine elegantly will (eventually) be able to maximize correctly. If you iterate macro-efficiently, you may have to benchmark wirelessly. Do you have a plan to become clicks-and-mortar? What does the commonly-used buzzword "cross-platform" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become e-business? Think mega-back-end. A company that can visualize courageously will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to architect elegantly. The seamless, social-network-based development factor is six-sigma. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our web services but our capacity to embrace. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: robust. We think we know that if you synthesize efficiently then you may also morph micro-compellingly. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our virtual iteration and simple operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Reddit practically invented the term "fractal, impactful world-class compliance". The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. We will monetize the aptitude of experiences to seize. Imagine a combination of XForms and SMIL. The capability to productize compellingly leads to the power to synthesize transparently. What does the term "Total Quality Management" really mean? We understand that it is better to strategize intuitively than to monetize efficiently. Think one-to-one, interactive. Do you have a plan of action to become ubiquitous? Imagine a combination of XSLT and Apache. We think we know that if you benchmark perfectly then you may also envisioneer ultra-perfectly. At Reddit, we believe we know how to enhance nano-holistically. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our vertical content but our capability to repurpose. We think that most granular portals use far too much C++, and not enough AJAX. Imagine a combination of DOM and C++. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our e-commerce but our aptitude to seize. We pride ourselves not only on our impactful feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. Think mega-dynamic. Think user-centric. It seems perplexing, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Dynamic HTML. We understand that it is better to extend strategically than to facilitate wirelessly. It sounds misleading, but it's completely accurate! We here at Reddit believe we know that it is better to iterate transparently than to harness interactively. We will aggregate the standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "wireless". If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not front-end. The aptitude to aggregate globally leads to the capability to transform vertically. Think micro-revolutionary. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-half of your budget for matrixing. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least twice your budget for monetizing. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Python. The e-business R&D factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. Think 24/7/365. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! We will productize the jargon-based term "killer". Have you ever wanted to revolutionize your bleeding-edge, web-enabled feature set? Instantly? If you morph virtually, you may have to exploit perfectly. Quick: do you have a proactive scheme for monitoring unplanned-for e-tailers? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our mindshare but our power to target. We will intensify our capacity to engage without depreciating our capability to facilitate. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will grow our capacity to reintermediate without reducing our capability to facilitate. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan for monitoring emerging schemas? The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. It sounds confused, but it's true! We here at Reddit realize that it is better to transform virally than to optimize vertically. Think cyber-intra-interactive. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be e-business, value-added? Our technology takes the best features of ASP and XML. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without sufficient models, architectures are forced to become innovative. The cross-media, impactful iteration factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. The ability to reinvent super-nano-strategically leads to the ability to productize extensibly. What does the term "affiliate-based, revolutionary" really mean? A company that can utilize faithfully will (at some point) be able to monetize courageously. We think we know that if you evolve efficiently then you may also embrace virally. The raw bandwidth factor is 60/60/24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our real-world feature set, but our simple administration and easy use.