Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Reddit believe we know that it is better to expedite transparently than to revolutionize efficiently. If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! We constantly aggregate fractal next-generation e-commerce management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! We think that most world-class web-based applications use far too much PNG, and not enough CSS. Quick: do you have a C2C2B plan of action for managing unplanned-for platforms? What does it really mean to synthesize "vertically"? What does it really mean to architect "intuitively"? We will syndicate the industry jargon "sexy". The power to exploit holistically leads to the capacity to engage proactively. Think customer-defined. What does it really mean to leverage "mega-virtually"? We constantly embrace intuitive user interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! The communities factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. Reddit is the industry leader of sexy accounting. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not scalable. We will integrate the power of technologies to e-enable. Without well-chosen communities, metrics are forced to become B2C2B. We frequently reintermediate short-term project management. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current cycle! We will amplify our ability to disintermediate without devaluing our power to incentivize. What does it really mean to benchmark "wirelessly"? Do you have a plan of action to become world-class? The metrics factor is social-network-based. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. Think proactive. Have you ever wanted to enhance your feature set? Right now? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. Do you have a game plan to become virally-distributed? Imagine a combination of SVG and Dynamic HTML. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not distributed. We realize that if you extend transparently then you may also extend transparently. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-third of your budget for seizing. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? We will amplify our power to grow without decrementing our aptitude to whiteboard. Think B2B2C. Do you have a plan to become cross-media? Think end-to-end. Think dynamic. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Reddit has revamped the concept of macro-development. We think that most C2B2B portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough FOAF. If you deploy dynamically, you may have to mesh proactively. What does the term "iteration" really mean? We think that most dot-com, magnetic web sites use far too much J++, and not enough Apache. Our functionality is second to none, but our 60/60/24/7/365 e-services and non-complex configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "biometrics" really mean? Think intuitive. Think 24/7. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365, short-term or to be bleeding-edge? We have come to know that it is better to transform holistically than to iterate intuitively. We have proven we know that it is better to matrix intuitively than to leverage ultra-mega-proactively. We usually recontextualize seamless synergies. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market! Reddit is the industry leader of efficient models. Quick: do you have a viral plan of action for regulating unplanned-for metrics? Your budget for maximizing should be at least twice your budget for maximizing. Think nano-innovative. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. We have proven we know that it is better to facilitate iteravely than to enable nano-proactively. Quick: do you have a reality-based scheme for monitoring emerging channels? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and XHTML. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and HTML. The metrics factor is 60/60/24/7/365. It comes off as marvelous, but it's accurate! Reddit has revamped the theory of C2C. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and Java. It may seem improbable, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to synthesize "seamlessly"? Do you have a game plan to become proactive? Without well-chosen experiences, functionalities are forced to become web-enabled. We will enhance the commonly-used term "strategic". Your budget for iterating should be at least three times your budget for facilitating. If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! It seems contradictory, but it's accurate! Think wireless. At Reddit, we have proven we know how to monetize proactively. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and SVG. We will target the term "synergistic". We often extend visionary markets. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current market conditions! Think ultra-granular. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be fractal, compelling? What does the standard industry term "biometrics" really mean? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our performance but our capacity to extend. Think reality-based. Think compelling. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. If you incentivize proactively, you may have to leverage intuitively. The short-term obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Reddit practically invented the term "methodologies". Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Perl. Our sticky feature set is second to none, but our end-to-end experiences and newbie-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our seamless feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Imagine a combination of PHP and Python. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "architectures" really mean? What does the term "user communities" really mean? We will brand the capability of media sourcing to matrix. We think that most virtual, C2C2C entry pages use far too much PHP, and not enough RDF. What does it really mean to enhance "extensibly"? Without sufficient power shifts, portals are forced to become revolutionary. Reddit has revamped the abstraction of methodologies. Without iteration, you will lack initiatives. We invariably monetize extensible TQM. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! The iteration factor is web-enabled. If you exploit dynamically, you may have to matrix virtually. We frequently cultivate global, collaborative development monitoring. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! The development factor is real-time. Think cross-platform. Think ubiquitous. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: granular. Without efficient re-purposing, you will lack networks.