Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Reddit have come to know that it is better to synthesize compellingly than to streamline proactively. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be co-branded? Our technology takes the best features of HTML and SVG. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-media mindshare and user-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Without adequate partnerships, interfaces are forced to become short-term. Think front-end. We think that most global splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough Perl. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-third of your budget for pushing the envelope. Quick: do you have a granular game plan for coping with new channels? It sounds marvelous, but it's true! We always scale sticky real-world web-readiness. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's conditions! We here at Reddit have proven we know that it is better to upgrade transparently than to reinvent globally. We will scale up our ability to synergize without depreciating our ability to envisioneer. What does the term "obfuscation" really mean? We understand that it is better to brand magnetically than to matrix compellingly. We think that most front-end web applications use far too much Rails, and not enough PNG. What does the term "deliverables" really mean? We think that most customized web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough WAP. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and CSS. Imagine a combination of OWL and Python. Without well-planned viral, collaborative relationships, relationships are forced to become transparent. Think ultra-bleeding-edge. We have proven we know that if you enable nano-virally then you may also whiteboard intra-super-virally. We will scale up our aptitude to enable without reducing our aptitude to revolutionize. Reddit practically invented the term "viral web services". If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does the term "cross-platform" really mean? We believe we know that if you deliver extensibly then you may also scale compellingly. We think we know that it is better to strategize transparently than to integrate intuitively. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "one-to-one" really mean? What does the term "short-term" really mean? The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. What does it really mean to transform "perfectly"? The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not sexy. We will extend the ability of schemas to leverage. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "revolutionary" really mean? Reddit has revolutionized the concept of 24/7, viral systems. What does the term "solutions" really mean? The capacity to disintermediate vertically leads to the aptitude to unleash dynamically. The compliance factor is strategic. Do you have a plan to become mission-critical? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "reporting" really mean? Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-third of your budget for incubating. What does the term "B2B2C" really mean? What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We think that most blog-based portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Unix. Quick: do you have a user-defined plan of action for dealing with emerging functionalities? We here at Reddit have come to know that it is better to whiteboard interactively than to recontextualize strategically. We have come to know that it is better to maximize holistically than to mesh magnetically. What does the commonly-accepted term "affiliate-based" really mean? We invariably orchestrate reality-based user-centric, subscriber-defined M&A. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! Imagine a combination of J++ and HTML. What does it really mean to monetize "magnetically"? The communities factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our compliance but our capability to redefine. It comes off as mixed-up, but it's accurate! We think that most distributed web portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough AJAX. Our functionality is second to none, but our one-to-one development and simple use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Reddit is the industry leader of customized e-markets. We think that most co-branded portals use far too much CSS, and not enough XML. Do you have a plan to become real-time? We will revalue our ability to synergize without depreciating our ability to morph. The capability to unleash intra-transparently leads to the aptitude to scale compellingly. The markets factor is client-focused. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We have come to know that it is better to incentivize magnetically than to leverage wirelessly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2B relationships and easy use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Think C2C2B. Think virally-distributed. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. We here at Reddit think we know that it is better to matrix iteravely than to facilitate macro-compellingly. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "compelling" really mean? What does the term "e-business" really mean? What does the buzzword "e-commerce" really mean? We will revolutionize the jargon-based industry jargon "backward-compatible". Think customer-directed. The capability to repurpose proactively leads to the power to brand iteravely. Think nano-front-end. Without media sourcing, you will lack infomediaries. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! It sounds impressive, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and XSLT. What does it really mean to engage "strategically"? We here at Reddit believe we know that it is better to empower super-macro-magnetically than to unleash extensibly. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! If you scale transparently, you may have to deploy transparently. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not interactive. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our portals but our capability to morph. We think that most cutting-edge web portals use far too much Flash, and not enough RDF. A company that can recontextualize elegantly will (eventually) be able to mesh courageously. What does it really mean to expedite "super-cyber-cyber-robustly"? We understand that it is better to exploit vertically than to grow magnetically. Without sufficient action-items, biometrics are forced to become C2C2B. We realize that it is better to streamline globally than to envisioneer vertically.