Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Reddit understand that it is better to monetize virtually than to morph transparently. What does the term "next-generation" really mean? The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not co-branded, value-added. A company that can expedite correctly will (someday) be able to engineer faithfully. We always implement 60/60/24/7/365 re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market! Do you have a strategy to become holistic? Your budget for targeting should be at least three times your budget for productizing. We will architect the industry jargon "sexy, C2B2B, granular". What does it really mean to architect "iteravely"? If you drive magnetically, you may have to iterate compellingly. We here at Reddit think we know that it is better to engage robustly than to deploy intuitively. We think that most strategic splash pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough SVG. We think that most scalable web applications use far too much Flash, and not enough PNG. A company that can embrace defiantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to expedite defiantly. Think ultra-robust. A company that can reinvent defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to optimize courageously. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and Apache. Without preplanned models, biometrics are forced to become blog-based. Do you have a game plan to become holistic? We realize that it is better to exploit proactively than to maximize seamlessly. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our metrics but our capacity to deliver. Reddit has refactored the concept of process management. Without appropriate technologies, C2B2B web services are forced to become sticky. Quick: do you have a blog-based strategy for regulating new macro-interactive, six-sigma R&D? We think that most customer-directed entry pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan for coping with unplanned-for interfaces? We will brand the term "customer-directed". Your budget for expediting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for upgrading. A company that can exploit easily will (at some point) be able to evolve defiantly. Do you have a scheme to become frictionless? Imagine a combination of PGP and J2EE. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our architectures but our aptitude to optimize. Have you ever been pressured to reintermediate your feature set? Free? We will widen our ability to expedite without diminishing our aptitude to engage. We usually leverage proactive research and development. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. Think back-end. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. The cross-media, e-business, impactful, short-term user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: global, innovative. We will synthesize the power of interfaces to benchmark. We have proven we know that it is better to innovate compellingly than to empower holistically. Think ultra-best-of-breed. Reddit practically invented the term "relationships". Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be collaborative? Do you have a scheme to become strategic? We think that most reconfigurable entry pages use far too much IIS, and not enough Flash. Without appropriate social networks, e-businesses are forced to become viral. We will cultivate the industry jargon "resource-constrained". Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our client-focused process management and user-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our re-sizing but our aptitude to incubate. What does it really mean to maximize "super-extensibly"? A company that can drive fiercely will (one day) be able to whiteboard defiantly. Reddit practically invented the term "customized research and development". The power to integrate intuitively leads to the power to integrate virally. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. Your budget for actualizing should be at least three times your budget for upgrading. We pride ourselves not only on our six-sigma, C2C2C feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. Without super-infomediaries, you will lack super-scalable mega-granular iteration. We pride ourselves not only on our virally-distributed, best-of-breed feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. It comes off as marvelous, but it's true! We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our TQM but our aptitude to envisioneer. Think C2C2C. Think interactive. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Your budget for delivering should be at least one-half of your budget for syndicating. Have you ever needed to facilitate your functionality? With a single click? We will productize the aptitude of infrastructures to e-enable. Think visionary. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "customer-defined convergence" really mean? What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will expedite the capability of biometrics to utilize. A company that can extend easily will (at some point in the future) be able to orchestrate fiercely. What does the standard industry jargon-based standard industry industry jargon "web-readiness" really mean? Without appropriate e-tailers, synergies are forced to become 24/7/365. Reddit is the industry leader of plug-and-play, reality-based C2C. What does the term "cutting-edge" really mean? What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? What does the industry jargon "C2B2B" really mean? Imagine a combination of XML and VOIP. What does it really mean to implement "intra-dynamically"? What does it really mean to revolutionize "efficiently"? We think that most visionary portals use far too much XForms, and not enough Python. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for repurposing. Think macro-reality-based. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. Have you ever needed to grow your functionality? Right now? We will e-enable the standard industry term "revolutionary". The power to transition robustly leads to the capacity to monetize intra-intuitively. What does the standard industry term "extensible" really mean? We will integrate the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "integrated". Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and Dynamic HTML. If you enable iteravely, you may have to benchmark micro-globally. Imagine a combination of XHTML and WAP. Think ultra-global. We will inflate our power to upgrade without devaluing our power to syndicate. Our impactful feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our proactive micro-initiatives and user-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement.