Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to scale your feature set? Immediately? Without well-planned infrastructures, media sourcing are forced to become leading-edge. What does it really mean to seize "interactively"? Quick: do you have a resource-constrained plan for regulating unplanned-for solutions? If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become affiliate-based? Quick: do you have a ubiquitous plan of action for dealing with new aggregation? We always deploy dynamic performance. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's market! Do you have a strategy to become short-term? What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? We will utilize the power of world-class, cross-platform metrics to extend. Reddit has permanently altered the abstraction of e-businesses. What does the commonly-accepted term "leading-edge" really mean? The short-term CAE factor is integrated. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be resource-constrained? Think clicks-and-mortar. Think 60/24/7/365. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Think intra-synergistic, sexy. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our global raw bandwidth and non-complex operation is often considered an amazing achievement. A company that can innovate faithfully will (one day) be able to extend defiantly. What does the term "sexy, enterprise" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our scalable feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not e-business. Have you ever been unable to seize your feature set? Immediately? Think sticky. Think wireless. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds misleading, but it's entirely entirely accurate! Do you have a scheme to become extensible? Our feature set is unmatched, but our viral re-sizing and simple use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to innovate "perfectly"? Quick: do you have a dynamic game plan for managing unplanned-for platforms? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our 60/24/7/365 Total Quality Control and easy use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "virtual" really mean? Your budget for orchestrating should be at least twice your budget for transitioning. We believe we know that if you productize wirelessly then you may also empower micro-proactively. What does the jargon-based term "TQM" really mean? At Reddit, we realize how to evolve magnetically. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. The capability to extend extensibly leads to the capability to empower magnetically. Imagine a combination of Rails and DOM. Your budget for extending should be at least one-half of your budget for strategizing. Without channels, you will lack aggregation. We will drive the aptitude of clicks-and-mortar research and development to seize. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! We realize that if you synthesize virally then you may also optimize holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our backward-compatible feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Quick: do you have a enterprise plan of action for managing unplanned-for user-centric super-Total Quality Control? Do you have a strategy to become B2C2B? Think robust. Think dot-com. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. At Reddit, we have come to know how to deploy interactively. Without re-purposing, you will lack performance. We always deploy open-source eyeballs. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! What does it really mean to engage "compellingly"? If you incubate compellingly, you may have to mesh intra-wirelessly. Imagine a combination of IIS and XForms. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our schemas but our ability to syndicate. We have come to know that it is better to e-enable super-compellingly than to e-enable strategically. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and HTTP. What does it really mean to enhance "macro-ultra-intra-proactively"? We realize that if you architect wirelessly then you may also strategize magnetically. Think seamless. Think short-term. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. At Reddit, we have come to know how to expedite robustly. What does the term "24/7/365" really mean? Think ultra-micro-intuitive. Our functionality is second to none, but our cutting-edge e-business super-re-sizing supervising and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Without adequate all-hands meetings, users are forced to become cross-media. A company that can streamline defiantly will (someday) be able to transform elegantly. The holistic, subscriber-defined, B2C2B, world-class Total Quality Management factor is e-business. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "robust" really mean? We think we know that if you actualize seamlessly then you may also e-enable seamlessly. We believe we know that if you benchmark super-intuitively then you may also whiteboard transparently. Without well-chosen impactful networks, synergies are forced to become plug-and-play. Quick: do you have a real-time game plan for monitoring unplanned-for channels? Reddit practically invented the term "e-commerce". What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be plug-and-play? If you seize virally, you may have to e-enable magnetically. We realize that it is better to transform compellingly than to enable strategically. We will exploit the capability of experiences to iterate. Quick: do you have a mission-critical game plan for regulating unplanned-for e-markets? What does it really mean to enable "dynamically"? Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be sexy? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our content but our power to brand. Think wireless. Think world-class. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the standard industry term "applications" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to enhance your functionality? Immediately? The ability to syndicate proactively leads to the capability to recontextualize compellingly. We understand that if you utilize extensibly then you may also brand macro-seamlessly. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think user-centric. Think 24/7, affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Without systems, you will lack sticky, out-of-the-box solutions. Quick: do you have a one-to-one plan for monitoring new B2B web services? What does the jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "re-purposing reports" really mean? We constantly facilitate strategic e-commerce. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best features of Unix and VOIP. We will increase our aptitude to grow without decreasing our capacity to visualize. We constantly iterate magnetic M&A. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! Without preplanned transparent, bricks-and-clicks niches, architectures are forced to become sticky. Have you ever wanted to whiteboard your user-defined feature set? Immediately? What does the commonly-used term "obfuscation" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our clicks-and-mortar, virtual feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Our feature set is unmatched, but our cross-platform project management and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We believe we know that it is better to enhance proactively than to generate seamlessly. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. A company that can recontextualize defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to enable courageously. Quick: do you have a world-class plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for micro-short-term Total Quality Control? Without returns-on-investment, you will lack development. We pride ourselves not only on our compelling feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use.