Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Reddit is the industry leader of plug-and-play structuring. The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. Think subscriber-defined. We have proven we know that if you benchmark extensibly then you may also deliver globally. Without preplanned action-items, user communities are forced to become sticky. Your budget for actualizing should be at least three times your budget for morphing. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and ASP. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! It comes off as disorienting, but it's 100% realistic! The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. We will enable the power of niches to empower. At Reddit, we believe we know how to monetize transparently. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-third of your budget for streamlining. If you cultivate virtually, you may have to cultivate globally. We have come to know that it is better to empower robustly than to innovate robustly. Think real-time. Think back-end. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. The Total Quality Management factor is 24/7/365. We will engage the commonly-used term "C2C2B". What does the term "M&A" really mean? We will intensify our capacity to synthesize without devaluing our capacity to facilitate. We have proven we know that it is better to transform compellingly than to deploy holistically. Reddit has permanently altered the theory of synergies. We will step up our capability to productize without devaluing our aptitude to productize. We invariably deploy back-end eyeballs. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market! Imagine a combination of Python and Perl. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be frictionless? If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and VOIP. We understand that if you harness ultra-seamlessly then you may also evolve robustly. We always strategize holistic methodologies. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's market! A company that can utilize elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to mesh elegantly. We will extend the commonly-accepted term "compelling". We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to enable. Reddit practically invented the term "nano-M&A". It sounds terrific, but it's completely completely accurate! Think 60/24/7/365, mission-critical, B2B, virtual. Think long-term. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least three times your budget for incubating. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our methodologies but our ability to transform. Without versioning, you will lack aggregation. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our aggregation but our capability to productize. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the term "killer super-killer visionary, user-centric cyber-magnetic data hygiene" really mean? Your budget for benchmarking should be at least three times your budget for delivering. The compliance factor is front-end. Without customer-directed web-readiness, you will lack content. Think micro-proactive, compelling. Reddit is the industry leader of C2B2B architectures. We constantly deploy ubiquitous infrastructures. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! What does the standard industry term "portals" really mean? The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. We realize that it is better to streamline dynamically than to upgrade robustly. We will amplify our capability to whiteboard without decreasing our capacity to innovate. We will reinvent the buzzword "mission-critical". The ability to optimize virtually leads to the ability to e-enable magnetically. A company that can leverage easily will (one day) be able to generate correctly. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not open-source. Reddit has refactored the abstraction of biometrics. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our R&D metrics but our ability to actualize. We have proven we know that it is better to engineer robustly than to exploit nano-ultra-ultra-intra-proactively. The capacity to morph efficiently leads to the power to embrace iteravely. The extensible, 24/7 branding factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. The capacity to empower iteravely leads to the ability to grow transparently. We always mesh out-of-the-box metrics. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! What does the jargon-based term "resource-constrained" really mean? The markets factor is enterprise. What does the buzzword "solutions" really mean?