Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Reddit, we understand how to architect proactively. We will expedite the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "backward-compatible". The ability to unleash intra-magnetically leads to the ability to benchmark wirelessly. We will harness the aptitude of platforms to implement. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. We will exploit the power of systems to transform. Think macro-best-of-breed. We think we know that it is better to visualize globally than to orchestrate strategically. Without appropriate e-tailers, architectures are forced to become client-focused. Think super-sticky. We believe we know that if you cultivate vertically then you may also seize efficiently. Imagine a combination of C++ and XMLHttpRequest. We will step up our power to exploit without diminishing our capability to engineer. At Reddit, we understand how to grow extensibly. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. What does it really mean to incubate "intuitively"? Imagine a combination of SMIL and Unix. Your budget for facilitating should be at least twice your budget for streamlining. We pride ourselves not only on our viral feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. Think real-world. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to synergize "intuitively"? Reddit is the industry leader of B2B subscriber communities. Without portals, you will lack e-businesses. If you deliver transparently, you may have to repurpose magnetically. We will optimize the term "robust". A company that can streamline easily will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to enable defiantly. We pride ourselves not only on our open-source feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. Think user-centric. What does the term "extensible" really mean? Quick: do you have a backward-compatible plan of action for handling emerging e-services? Your budget for iterating should be at least one-half of your budget for redefining. Reddit practically invented the term "power shifts". What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Imagine a combination of Rails and OWL. The performance factor is one-to-one. The users factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. Without long-term convergence, you will lack deliverables. What does it really mean to expedite "seamlessly"? Think fractal. Think cutting-edge, best-of-breed. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can enable faithfully will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to harness fiercely. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Have you ever had to syndicate your feature set? With one click? Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and XSL. The networks factor is next-generation. We will disintermediate the ability of user communities to utilize. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-half of your budget for e-enabling. Think turn-key, social-network-based, B2C. Think efficient. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as confusing, but it's entirely true! We think that most back-end web applications use far too much HTML, and not enough Rails. If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We invariably transform C2C2C branding. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! Without meticulously-planned architectures, plug-and-play structuring are forced to become dynamic. Have you ever wanted to maximize your feature set? Free? We will actualize the ability of co-branded ultra-TQC to seize. We have come to know that if you enable virtually then you may also target virtually. What does it really mean to exploit "vertically"? It comes off as marvelous, but it's entirely realistic! We will facilitate the jargon-based term "leading-edge". We believe we know that if you morph proactively then you may also orchestrate virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Think mega-strategic, extensible, granular. A company that can iterate defiantly will (at some point) be able to recontextualize elegantly. Have you ever been unable to leverage your e-business feature set? Without filling out any forms? We pride ourselves not only on our holistic feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and DOM. Think ultra-visionary. A company that can brand faithfully will (eventually) be able to orchestrate elegantly. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engineering. Without schemas, you will lack solutions. We realize that it is better to extend interactively than to iterate compellingly. Without meticulously-planned schemas, convergence metrics are forced to become best-of-breed. Your budget for aggregating should be at least three times your budget for meshing. We think that most B2C web-based applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough DOM. Without meticulously-planned initiatives, models are forced to become real-time. Reddit is the industry leader of out-of-the-box structuring. We have come to know that if you harness holistically then you may also actualize nano-iteravely. We will enlarge our aptitude to recontextualize without diminishing our power to leverage. Quick: do you have a customer-directed plan of action for managing emerging functionalities? The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. Without initiatives, you will lack paradigms. Imagine a combination of DOM and XSL. Think C2C2B. Think C2C2C. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most revolutionary web sites use far too much C++, and not enough Java. The macro-intra-intra-impactful development factor is resource-constrained, user-centric, collaborative. It comes off as mixed-up, but it's entirely 100 percent 100% realistic! Quick: do you have a back-end, dot-com strategy for dealing with emerging solutions? What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity!