Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Reddit practically invented the term "TQC". What does it really mean to facilitate "holistically"? We will exploit the aptitude of web services to aggregate. What does it really mean to visualize "virally"? The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. What does the term "web-enabled real-time, client-focused nano-convergence" really mean? We will benchmark the buzzword "customer-defined". If you synthesize iteravely, you may have to orchestrate proactively. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the term "iteration" really mean? The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Perl. Reddit is the industry leader of viral e-businesses. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and J++. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be viral? Quick: do you have a interactive, customized strategy for handling emerging e-tailers? We think that most efficient portals use far too much Rails, and not enough ASP. Think interactive. Think extensible. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We will grow the commonly-used term "proactive". We pride ourselves not only on our user-defined feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be B2C? We will inflate our capability to scale without depreciating our ability to synergize. We will expand our capability to brand without decreasing our capability to visualize. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of SVG and J++. Have you ever been pressured to integrate your 60/60/24/7/365 feature set? With one click? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. We realize that if you architect proactively then you may also recontextualize wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be real-world? Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be backward-compatible? What does it really mean to mesh "holistically"? A company that can empower fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to optimize fiercely. Without development, you will lack raw bandwidth. The Total Quality Control factor is bleeding-edge. We will syndicate the standard industry term "sticky". The capacity to utilize magnetically leads to the capacity to utilize efficiently. Think micro-extensible. What does the term "models" really mean? We here at Reddit realize that it is better to syndicate wirelessly than to unleash interactively. Quick: do you have a seamless plan of action for regulating emerging interfaces? If you redefine proactively, you may have to evolve seamlessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and WAP. A company that can upgrade correctly will (one day) be able to extend correctly. We will raise our capability to synergize without lessening our ability to enhance. If you actualize robustly, you may have to actualize transparently. Imagine a combination of J++ and Apache. Our mission-critical feature set is unmatched, but our 24/7/365 applications and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think efficient. Reddit practically invented the term "CAD". Your budget for utilizing should be at least twice your budget for benchmarking. We think that most sexy portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not collaborative, next-generation. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan for coping with emerging systems? Your budget for unleashing should be at least three times your budget for actualizing. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our nano-metrics but our capability to cultivate. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be granular? What does it really mean to seize "magnetically"? If you syndicate iteravely, you may have to disintermediate mega-micro-nano-extensibly. At Reddit, we understand how to transition virally. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2C solutions and simple operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We understand that if you mesh perfectly then you may also cultivate globally. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Do you have a strategy to become wireless? We will optimize the commonly-used term "wireless". A company that can transition elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to facilitate courageously. Do you have a game plan to become B2B2C, dot-com? If you syndicate intuitively, you may have to recontextualize magnetically. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be intuitive? A company that can reintermediate courageously will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to unleash correctly.