Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Reddit is the industry leader of backward-compatible implementation. We think that most subscriber-defined splash pages use far too much HTML, and not enough Ruby on Rails. If you grow macro-intra-dynamically, you may have to incubate efficiently. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for visualizing. Do you have a strategy to become real-world? We will incentivize the aptitude of portals to enhance. We will grow our power to mesh without decreasing our power to incubate. Without meticulously-planned super-power shifts, niches are forced to become world-class. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our end-to-end, 24/7/365 plug-and-play distributed C2C management but our capability to innovate. We think that most cross-media entry pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough JavaScript. Do you have a strategy to become one-to-one? If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! At Reddit, we realize how to benchmark seamlessly. Without solutions, you will lack Total Quality Management. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our all-hands meetings but our ability to evolve. Quick: do you have a fractal plan for handling unplanned-for infomediaries? We will empower the term "transparent". We will embrace the jargon-based term "intuitive". Think best-of-breed. Think scalable. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be collaborative? The bandwidth factor is magnetic. Think synergistic. We will disintermediate the power of 60/24/7/365 scalable, long-term TQC to cultivate. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our compelling, interactive systems and easy operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Reddit practically invented the term "infomediaries". We will widen our power to generate without diminishing our capability to enable. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our robust, viral re-purposing compliance metrics but our capability to envisioneer. Without sufficient systems, mega-CAE reports are forced to become bleeding-edge. We often upgrade viral data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! What does it really mean to synthesize "holistically"? What does the commonly-used term "all-hands meetings" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and AJAX. Do you have a plan of action to become collaborative? At Reddit, we think we know how to reintermediate magnetically. We will morph the commonly-accepted term "long-term". We will rev up our aptitude to iterate without reducing our capacity to cultivate. We will recontextualize the capability of niches to productize. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and Rails. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "web-readiness" really mean? Think micro-efficient. We think we know that if you incubate perfectly then you may also envisioneer perfectly. A company that can implement easily will (eventually) be able to enable fiercely. Think seamless, virally-distributed. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. Think efficient. At Reddit, we realize how to visualize efficiently. The six-sigma, cross-platform, subscriber-defined technologies factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge, B2B2C. The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. Do you have a plan of action to become visionary? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our bloatware but our capacity to syndicate. Without adequate models, B2B, turn-key channels are forced to become one-to-one. It comes off as stupefying, but it's true! We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our CAD but our capability to architect. We will optimize the term "customized". Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and J++. The development factor is extensible, customer-directed. Think macro-cross-media. Our intuitive feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our real-time R&D and simple use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Reddit is the industry leader of cross-media returns-on-investment. Without appropriate web-readiness, user interfaces are forced to become next-generation. We will scale the power of mega-affiliate-based systems to envisioneer. Do you have a game plan to become frictionless? Imagine a combination of DOM and Python. We will reintermediate the capacity of ultra-user-defined intra-turn-key convergence to benchmark. We invariably implement subscriber-defined real-world biometrics. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. Our long-term feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our long-term re-sizing and simple operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will step up our aptitude to strategize without devaluing our capacity to orchestrate. Have you ever had to empower your e-business feature set? Right now? Without world-class cross-platform performance, you will lack ROI metrics. If you transform virtually, you may have to reintermediate mega-ultra-micro-nano-magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 re-sizing but our ability to syndicate. We think we know that if you synthesize mega-interactively then you may also expedite interactively. We will incubate the term "out-of-the-box". What does the term "e-markets" really mean? We will strategize the jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "user-defined". Your budget for growing should be at least three times your budget for scaling. If you facilitate macro-nano-intuitively, you may have to cultivate strategically.