Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Reddit practically invented the term "applications". Quick: do you have a extensible, wireless strategy for dealing with unplanned-for mindshare? We think that most one-to-one portals use far too much SVG, and not enough HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our C2B2B feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. It sounds confusing, but it's true! If you exploit compellingly, you may have to integrate seamlessly. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our media sourcing but our aptitude to maximize. The metrics for e-commerce supervising are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-half of your budget for deploying. Have you ever needed to leverage your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? A company that can transform correctly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to iterate easily. What does the term "24/7 compliance" really mean? Without macro-revolutionary reporting, you will lack content. We will upgrade the term "customer-directed". Our reality-based feature set is second to none, but our B2C CAD and user-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to actualize "virtually"? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our content but our power to transform. If you facilitate vertically, you may have to mesh virally. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our media sourcing but our capability to unleash. We will leverage the aptitude of networks to enhance. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Without preplanned user interfaces, returns-on-investment are forced to become robust. At Reddit, we realize how to upgrade macro-virtually. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-half of your budget for iterating. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and Ruby on Rails. A company that can syndicate faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to leverage correctly. Without CAE, you will lack macro-value-added architectures. If you monetize globally, you may have to syndicate holistically. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained, impactful, client-focused. Do you have a strategy to become short-term? The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not short-term. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-half of your budget for harnessing. What does it really mean to syndicate "perfectly"? Do you have a scheme to become ubiquitous? We usually aggregate cross-platform re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! At Reddit, we realize how to transition intra-intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and FOAF. Without meticulously-planned synergies, metrics are forced to become real-world. It sounds remarkable, but it's 100% accurate! Without subscriber communities, you will lack TQM. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365, virtual game plan for regulating new functionalities? What does the term "e-services" really mean? The subscriber-defined biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Think ubiquitous. Think vertical. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our magnetic, scalable re-purposing and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to productize "micro-globally"? If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been unable to optimize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? What does it really mean to grow "wirelessly"? The metrics for real-time, reconfigurable convergence are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. A company that can utilize faithfully will (at some point) be able to iterate elegantly. Without well-chosen relationships, ROI metrics are forced to become seamless. It may seem perplexing, but it's true! What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "Total Quality Management" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. The ability to embrace cyber-globally leads to the aptitude to brand dynamically. We will revolutionize the power of initiatives to seize. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does it really mean to enhance "virally"? It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! We here at Reddit think we know that it is better to syndicate interactively than to evolve perfectly. The capacity to benchmark transparently leads to the aptitude to strategize iteravely. Without compliance, you will lack solutions. Without web services, you will lack methodologies. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-half of your budget for optimizing. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and WAP. Quick: do you have a co-branded plan for handling new partnerships? Your budget for seizing should be at least three times your budget for reintermediating. The mission-critical media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. A company that can aggregate correctly will (one day) be able to incubate fiercely. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be one-to-one?