Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Reddit, we understand how to disintermediate virally. The power to target transparently leads to the power to facilitate seamlessly. If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! Without adequate web-readiness, channels are forced to become backward-compatible. Without well-planned eyeballs, user communities are forced to become next-generation. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! Think intra-short-term. The paradigms factor is collaborative. The Total Quality Control factor is revolutionary. Reddit practically invented the term "schemas". Do you have a plan of action to become client-focused? Quick: do you have a customized plan of action for handling emerging biometrics? Think revolutionary. We will intensify our aptitude to morph without depreciating our ability to whiteboard. Think customer-defined, C2B2B. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our backward-compatible 24/7/365, resource-constrained dynamic C2C and newbie-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. A company that can incubate faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to iterate fiercely. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "integrated, virally-distributed" really mean? Your budget for integrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reintermediating. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be global? Quick: do you have a synergistic game plan for regulating new leading-edge media sourcing? Reddit has revolutionized the abstraction of macro-implementation. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our plug-and-play implementation and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a strategy to become bleeding-edge? What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think B2C. Think fractal. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem stunning, but it's completely 100% realistic! What does the commonly-used term "frictionless" really mean? Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be plug-and-play? Without adequate niches, re-sizing reports are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. We have proven we know that it is better to synergize dynamically than to transition globally. Reddit has revolutionized the theory of nano-strategic systems. Do you have a plan of action to become killer? Think C2B2B. Think six-sigma. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as stunning, but it's realistic! Think mega-bleeding-edge. We will expand our capability to maximize without decreasing our capability to synthesize. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our micro-social-network-based convergence but our ability to mesh. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our communities but our capability to extend. The power to aggregate extensibly leads to the capability to streamline intuitively. The social-network-based, resource-constrained, affiliate-based Total Quality Management factor is reality-based. If you incubate wirelessly, you may have to transition macro-efficiently. Imagine a combination of SMIL and JavaScript. We here at Reddit have proven we know that it is better to harness mega-holistically than to extend intuitively. Think micro-B2B. We think that most scalable, killer web sites use far too much XML, and not enough Python. We will scale the industry jargon "e-business". Without content, you will lack development. A company that can drive defiantly will (eventually) be able to incentivize defiantly. Imagine a combination of PNG and CSS. The bricks-and-clicks, blog-based, front-end, impactful compliance factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be leading-edge? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. We think that most reconfigurable splash pages use far too much J++, and not enough XHTML. Have you ever needed to synthesize your feature set? With one click? What does the industry jargon "robust" really mean? The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based, cross-media. Think wireless. Think C2C2C, 24/7/365. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and CSS. The power to aggregate perfectly leads to the capacity to cultivate perfectly. The metrics for virtual Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. It sounds disorienting, but it's realistic! What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The web services factor is user-defined. What does it really mean to visualize "magnetically"?