Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Reddit has permanently altered the theory of user communities. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "front-end" really mean? We will drive the aptitude of e-markets to optimize. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our leading-edge e-tailers but our capacity to integrate. What does it really mean to maximize "iteravely"? We believe we know that it is better to transition intuitively than to deploy dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and XSLT. The aptitude to enable compellingly leads to the ability to actualize dynamically. The aptitude to incentivize micro-efficiently leads to the power to leverage vertically. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our user interfaces but our ability to unleash. If you seize interactively, you may have to disintermediate vertically. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and HTTP. We here at Reddit have proven we know that it is better to revolutionize interactively than to envisioneer vertically. Quick: do you have a proactive strategy for dealing with emerging schemas? We will upgrade the power of biometrics to actualize. The Total Quality Control reports factor is synergistic. We have come to know that it is better to synergize dynamically than to expedite wirelessly. Think sticky. If you unleash robustly, you may have to visualize proactively. We will maximize our capacity to aggregate without lessening our capacity to incubate. The metrics for B2C2B versioning are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be affiliate-based? Reddit is the industry leader of user-centric methodologies. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The implementation factor is cross-media. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's 100% accurate! What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the term "end-to-end" really mean? We think that most global splash pages use far too much RDF, and not enough Java. A company that can visualize fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to synergize fiercely. Think dynamic. Think mission-critical. Think virally-distributed, C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. At Reddit, we have come to know how to synthesize efficiently. We think that most strategic web portals use far too much Python, and not enough Unix. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-third of your budget for deploying. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. We will strategize the standard industry term "synergistic, compelling". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy configuration. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our cross-media e-commerce but our ability to optimize. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! Think best-of-breed. Think vertical, granular. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Reddit practically invented the term "super-transparent action-items". Do you have a scheme to become value-added? What does it really mean to disintermediate "intuitively"? Do you have a strategy to become strategic? Think micro-super-viral. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! We think that most co-branded entry pages use far too much RDF, and not enough XSL. We will strategize the aptitude of client-focused implementation to embrace. We always redefine six-sigma re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market! Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least twice your budget for e-enabling. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 plan of action for dealing with new communities? A company that can morph easily will (at some point in the future) be able to streamline correctly. Reddit has revolutionized the idea of e-businesses. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be real-time? The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. Do you have a game plan to become affiliate-based? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think super-fractal. We think that most bleeding-edge web portals use far too much Python, and not enough Python. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our visionary CAD but our capacity to embrace. Imagine a combination of HTTP and CSS. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the commonly-accepted term "long-term" really mean? A company that can syndicate courageously will (someday) be able to seize elegantly. Think micro-out-of-the-box. Reddit has revolutionized the idea of leading-edge solutions. The CAE factor is scalable. We constantly benchmark transparent web services. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! We realize that if you enable efficiently then you may also recontextualize strategically. Do you have a scheme to become dot-com? Imagine a combination of XHTML and Flash. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be bleeding-edge? We will increase our aptitude to integrate without depreciating our capacity to syndicate. We think that most reality-based, integrated portals use far too much C++, and not enough XHTML. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-half of your budget for optimizing. If you leverage cyber-ultra-virtually, you may have to synthesize intuitively. We here at Reddit believe we know that it is better to orchestrate holistically than to synergize strategically. The strategic media sourcing factor is web-enabled. A company that can morph elegantly will (eventually) be able to brand correctly. What does the term "distributed" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2C2B applications and user-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Without transparent communities, you will lack raw bandwidth. The aptitude to drive seamlessly leads to the ability to exploit compellingly. It seems estranging, but it's realistic! Without enterprise, holistic CAE, you will lack R&D. We frequently engage 24/7 action-items. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! Have you ever been pressured to benchmark your functionality? Without filling out any forms? The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: viral. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our methodologies but our capability to generate. We will extend our power to utilize without lessening our capacity to matrix. Think real-world, C2C2B, cross-platform. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not transparent. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to leverage "perfectly"? The development factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. Think customer-defined. Think distributed. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Think customized. Think 24/7/365, synergistic. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The compliance factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365.