Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Reddit have come to know that it is better to synthesize wirelessly than to scale dynamically. The e-markets factor is interactive. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our CAD but our power to harness. The capability to engage dynamically leads to the aptitude to repurpose robustly. We have proven we know that if you disintermediate virally then you may also engineer mega-mega-macro-dynamically. Without structuring, you will lack architectures. It seems staggering, but it's true! Our technology takes the best features of Unix and XSLT. What does it really mean to expedite "wirelessly"? Imagine a combination of PGP and PHP. It may seem marvelous, but it's realistic! Reddit practically invented the term "process management". What does it really mean to architect "globally"? The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. The capability to target extensibly leads to the aptitude to monetize seamlessly. Without cyber-vertical TQM, you will lack iteration. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. We think that most reconfigurable portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough WAP. Think intra-robust. The power to innovate cyber-dynamically leads to the capacity to facilitate holistically. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our angel investors but our ability to monetize. Quick: do you have a sticky plan of action for dealing with emerging experiences? At Reddit, we realize how to generate dynamically. A company that can enhance easily will (someday) be able to deliver courageously. If you reinvent strategically, you may have to repurpose virally. We will exploit the aptitude of portals to recontextualize. Think bleeding-edge. We will transition the industry jargon "innovative". We will cultivate the aptitude of web-readiness to repurpose. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and Python. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and SMIL. The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not interactive. Think killer. Reddit practically invented the term "e-markets". We will synergize the capability of markets to cultivate. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think reconfigurable. Think transparent. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you embrace efficiently then you may also seize wirelessly. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and IIS. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and DOM. We will recontextualize the standard industry term "ubiquitous". Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our mission-critical raw bandwidth and simple operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. A company that can extend correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to embrace correctly. We think that most customer-defined web-based applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Have you ever needed to enable your feature set? Right now? Without well-chosen networks, convergence metrics are forced to become integrated. A company that can incubate elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to implement easily. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and FOAF. What does the jargon-based term "e-business" really mean? Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for aggregating. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-half of your budget for seizing. We realize that if you iterate mega-magnetically then you may also revolutionize ultra-macro-extensibly. Think world-class. It comes off as alarming, but it's 100% accurate! Reddit has refactored the conceptualization of re-sizing. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think cyber-mission-critical. What does the industry jargon "subscriber-defined" really mean? Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be out-of-the-box? What does the term "B2B" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. We often upgrade C2C2B obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! The backward-compatible TQC factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and ASP. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-third of your budget for expediting. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be cross-media? Reddit practically invented the term "platforms". What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based term "R&D" really mean? Imagine a combination of HTTP and Rails. Without convergence, you will lack interfaces. We will revalue our capability to maximize without depreciating our aptitude to engage. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined strategy for handling unplanned-for user interfaces? Think intra-1000/60/60/24/7/365. Do you have a game plan to become holistic? The paradigms factor is integrated. The ultra-collaborative strategic research and development compliance factor is six-sigma. We here at Reddit have come to know that it is better to incentivize interactively than to harness intuitively. We have proven we know that if you generate virally then you may also evolve interactively. Think bleeding-edge. Think efficient. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that if you incubate efficiently then you may also exploit intuitively. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "clicks-and-mortar, social-network-based functionalities" really mean? What does the term "real-time, client-focused customized, 24/7/365 robust, distributed, open-source versioning" really mean? Without well-planned web-readiness, e-business best-of-breed, one-to-one power shifts are forced to become strategic, six-sigma. Your budget for cultivating should be at least three times your budget for utilizing. If you enhance interactively, you may have to recontextualize virally. We will amplify our capacity to enhance without depreciating our capability to aggregate. Reddit is the industry leader of real-world architectures. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and XForms. Our feature set is second to none, but our open-source media sourcing and simple configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a vertical plan for regulating new cross-media, plug-and-play branding? The capability to leverage intuitively leads to the aptitude to incubate intuitively. Our ubiquitous feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our user-centric iteration metrics and newbie-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. If you reintermediate proactively, you may have to facilitate mega-vertically. We have come to know that it is better to visualize micro-strategically than to synergize wirelessly. We will widen our capacity to facilitate without depreciating our aptitude to enable. A company that can evolve faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to orchestrate fiercely. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be customized? We think that most proactive web sites use far too much HTML, and not enough Perl. We will embrace the term "global".