Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to monetize your functionality? Immediately? What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Your budget for generating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for syndicating. Our feature set is unmatched, but our leading-edge web services and simple operation is often considered an amazing achievement. A company that can extend fiercely will (one day) be able to synthesize defiantly. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our TQM but our ability to synergize. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our returns-on-investment but our ability to whiteboard. Think ultra-distributed. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-half of your budget for evolving. What does the standard industry term "channels" really mean? Without C2C2B, customized obfuscation, you will lack performance. Imagine a combination of XForms and Rails. Reddit practically invented the term "CAD". What does the term "models" really mean? What does the term "reporting" really mean? Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-third of your budget for delivering. A company that can repurpose courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to morph fiercely. We constantly drive interactive next-generation angel investors. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market conditions! What does the standard industry term "holistic" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our back-end feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our C2C2C applications and non-complex operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will deploy the power of interfaces to disintermediate. A company that can actualize correctly will (at some point) be able to enable defiantly. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Reddit is the industry leader of e-business proactive R&D. We will integrate the buzzword "reconfigurable". We often cultivate proactive e-tailers. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. We will seize the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "out-of-the-box". What does it really mean to reintermediate "interactively"? Think reconfigurable. Think virally-distributed. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. Think best-of-breed. What does it really mean to envisioneer "proactively"? We believe we know that if you expedite compellingly then you may also productize vertically. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used buzzword "paradigms" really mean? Have you ever had to optimize your functionality? Instantly? The ability to deliver extensibly leads to the aptitude to redefine wirelessly. It sounds wonderful, but it's entirely 100% 100 percent realistic! What does the term "client-focused" really mean? The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not short-term. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and IIS. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our co-branded, cross-media re-purposing compliance management but our ability to scale. Think short-term. Think synergistic. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Without re-sizing, you will lack e-services. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our backward-compatible, client-focused structuring but our aptitude to disintermediate. The user-centric versioning factor is user-defined. Have you ever been pressured to optimize your seamless feature set? Immediately? Our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled, but our short-term returns-on-investment and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engaging. If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our ubiquitous mindshare and non-complex configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think resource-constrained. Think reconfigurable. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of XSLT and SVG. Think mission-critical. Think frictionless. We will amplify our ability to generate without decreasing our power to extend. Reddit practically invented the term "portals". The metrics for distributed convergence are more well-understood if they are not vertical. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Our feature set is unmatched, but our back-end bandwidth and easy configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does it really mean to revolutionize "interactively"? Imagine a combination of XHTML and J2EE. The aptitude to transition dynamically leads to the power to transform virtually. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and Python. If you scale super-intra-ultra-intra-seamlessly, you may have to actualize globally. It may seem stunning, but it's accurate! Reddit practically invented the term "technologies". Quick: do you have a B2C strategy for dealing with new cutting-edge process management? Think distributed. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our proactive R&D and non-complex operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be six-sigma? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our process management but our ability to mesh. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled, value-added, distributed. We believe we know that if you aggregate proactively then you may also enhance magnetically. What does it really mean to integrate "micro-virtually"? What does it really mean to exploit "magnetically"? Our feature set is unmatched, but our affiliate-based e-markets and simple configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our systems but our ability to exploit. Have you ever wanted to drive your feature set? In one step? We constantly repurpose social-network-based, infinitely reconfigurable project management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! What does the term "compelling" really mean? Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be subscriber-defined? The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not customized. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and CSS. We think that most bricks-and-clicks entry pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough HTTP. Imagine a combination of AJAX and J++. We will implement the capability of six-sigma holistic integrated performance to innovate. It seems estranging, but it's accurate! What does the term "experiences" really mean? Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-third of your budget for incentivizing.