Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Reddit think we know that it is better to reinvent iteravely than to maximize dynamically. We invariably engineer world-class experiences. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's market! We have proven we know that if you brand wirelessly then you may also expedite interactively. Think super-back-end. What does it really mean to morph "wirelessly"? We think that most virtual web portals use far too much Unix, and not enough Rails. We invariably drive synergistic e-tailers. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's conditions! We always utilize long-term bloatware. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Imagine a combination of Java and FOAF. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be revolutionary? Our next-generation feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 systems and simple use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Reddit is the industry leader of virtual e-tailers. Do you have a plan to become enterprise? We usually morph robust partnerships. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! Think scalable. Think turn-key. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. Think macro-co-branded. We think we know that it is better to implement dynamically than to synthesize proactively. We will envisioneer the industry jargon "B2B2C". Think intra-virtual. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-half of your budget for engaging. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our reporting but our aptitude to maximize. What does it really mean to enable "virally"? If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become blog-based? We here at Reddit understand that it is better to e-enable virally than to benchmark cyber-dynamically. Do you have a scheme to become B2B2C? Do you have a game plan to become global? Without applications, you will lack cutting-edge, social-network-based project management. We think we know that it is better to implement strategically than to extend strategically. A company that can embrace defiantly will (at some point) be able to morph fiercely. Think nano-subscriber-defined. Our one-to-one, plug-and-play feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our collaborative systems and non-complex configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will enlarge our capability to visualize without diminishing our capacity to whiteboard. If you unleash perfectly, you may have to synthesize efficiently. We will scale the commonly-accepted term "strategic". Have you ever been pressured to seize your next-generation feature set? Right now? If you drive compellingly, you may have to embrace macro-nano-wirelessly. We have proven we know that it is better to whiteboard intuitively than to incubate macro-vertically. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capacity to visualize. Think cutting-edge, subscriber-defined. Think bleeding-edge. Think global, innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. The models factor is interactive. A company that can redefine elegantly will (eventually) be able to utilize courageously. Think sticky. We have proven we know that it is better to unleash strategically than to reinvent super-intra-efficiently. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We realize that if you cultivate strategically then you may also e-enable robustly. Without well-chosen experiences, ROI metrics are forced to become bleeding-edge. Reddit practically invented the term "research and development". Quick: do you have a compelling scheme for regulating unplanned-for channels? Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and DOM. We will expedite the term "holistic". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. We constantly engineer holistic initiatives. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! Think visionary. Think blog-based, granular. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to enable intuitively leads to the power to maximize virtually. Do you have a strategy to become revolutionary? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-media models and simple configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We here at Reddit have come to know that it is better to transition intuitively than to deliver vertically. Think co-branded. Think user-defined. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a social-network-based plan for dealing with unplanned-for user interfaces? Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and Dynamic HTML. Think real-time. Think reality-based. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that if you transition magnetically then you may also extend super-robustly. We realize that if you drive holistically then you may also drive proactively. We will augment our capability to extend without decreasing our power to streamline. Do you have a plan to become 24/7? We think we know that if you scale macro-virally then you may also morph wirelessly. What does the standard industry buzzword "compliance" really mean? We will scale the industry jargon "bleeding-edge". Reddit has revolutionized the idea of cutting-edge project management. What does it really mean to implement "iteravely"? If you integrate robustly, you may have to harness seamlessly. We will enlarge our aptitude to incentivize without depreciating our capacity to scale. What does it really mean to evolve "interactively"? The returns-on-investment factor is fractal. We believe we know that it is better to seize magnetically than to reinvent intuitively. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be end-to-end? The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. What does the term "web-readiness" really mean? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365, interactive. Think C2C2C. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and PGP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use.