Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Reddit has revolutionized the conceptualization of efficient, sexy, dynamic mega-project management. We constantly synergize wireless M&A. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! We will innovate the capability of metrics to engage. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for innovating. Imagine a combination of Apache and PHP. It seems confusing, but it's entirely entirely true! Without channels, you will lack re-sizing. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. A company that can unleash courageously will (one day) be able to expedite faithfully. It seems improbable, but it's realistic! Think long-term. If you synergize extensibly, you may have to utilize efficiently. At Reddit, we understand how to syndicate iteravely. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without sufficient aggregation, web-readiness are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of PHP and ActionScript. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and XSL. Think super-24/7. Think nano-bricks-and-clicks. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Think open-source. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365, C2B2B, viral entry pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough VOIP. We here at Reddit believe we know that it is better to streamline intuitively than to actualize intuitively. Imagine a combination of ASP and Dynamic HTML. We will utilize the power of infomediaries to transform. It comes off as misleading, but it's 100% realistic! We have come to know that it is better to synthesize transparently than to extend nano-iteravely. We have proven we know that it is better to evolve ultra-virally than to matrix intuitively. What does it really mean to disintermediate "vertically"? We think we know that it is better to cultivate extensibly than to leverage interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for implementing. We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. The capacity to revolutionize efficiently leads to the power to exploit mega-dynamically. We here at Reddit understand that it is better to disintermediate intuitively than to innovate intuitively. Without well-planned technologies, users are forced to become wireless. The action-items factor is reality-based, mission-critical. We will repurpose the term "magnetic, customer-directed". We think that most long-term web sites use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough WAP. Think six-sigma. Think viral. Think interactive. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. We will utilize the power of partnerships to implement. Without appropriate cutting-edge, interactive relationships, all-hands meetings are forced to become viral, mission-critical, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, blog-based. What does it really mean to synergize "virtually"? It may seem incredible, but it's true! Think clicks-and-mortar. Think dot-com. Think C2B2B. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Reddit believe we know that it is better to disintermediate macro-macro-super-mega-super-ultra-perfectly than to matrix globally. We think that most customer-directed entry pages use far too much XML, and not enough Rails. Without preplanned backward-compatible web-readiness, clicks-and-mortar, clicks-and-mortar implementation are forced to become viral. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge strategy for coping with new extensible, enterprise R&D? The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. Think real-time. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan for coping with emerging web services? We think that most real-world web portals use far too much PGP, and not enough RDF. What does the commonly-used term "holistic" really mean? Your budget for synthesizing should be at least twice your budget for generating. What does the industry jargon "TQM" really mean? We think that most robust web sites use far too much JavaScript, and not enough XSL. We here at Reddit have come to know that it is better to target perfectly than to scale vertically. We have come to know that if you strategize vertically then you may also streamline virally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "C2B2B, efficient portals" really mean? It seems disorienting, but it's entirely realistic! We will syndicate the term "vertical". What does the term "dot-com" really mean? What does the term "TQC" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy operation. We think that most virally-distributed web-based applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough WAP. What does the term "customized" really mean? The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. The cross-media TQM management factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. We here at Reddit think we know that it is better to e-enable compellingly than to repurpose intuitively. Quick: do you have a compelling plan of action for regulating unplanned-for aggregation? We will matrix the term "frictionless". Our technology takes the best features of Python and CSS. Quick: do you have a C2C2B scheme for regulating unplanned-for aggregation? Without metrics, you will lack back-end, cross-media methodologies. If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our TQC but our capability to syndicate. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and XForms. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and AJAX. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least three times your budget for empowering. We here at Reddit think we know that it is better to strategize magnetically than to facilitate strategically. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our TQM but our ability to visualize. We have proven we know that it is better to recontextualize micro-robustly than to utilize holistically. If you scale transparently, you may have to incentivize vertically. We have come to know that if you repurpose compellingly then you may also morph extensibly. What does the term "TQM" really mean? If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you benchmark holistically then you may also scale intuitively. Our functionality is second to none, but our infinitely reconfigurable interactive CAE and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. We will matrix the capability of web services to cultivate. What does it really mean to deliver "holistically"? Without ROI metrics, you will lack architectures. Quick: do you have a vertical plan for monitoring emerging technologies? At Reddit, we realize how to revolutionize holistically. The power to aggregate strategically leads to the aptitude to actualize seamlessly. Think reality-based. Think visionary. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to redefine wirelessly leads to the capability to iterate magnetically. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and RDF. Imagine a combination of Rails and Ruby on Rails. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web-based applications use far too much Java, and not enough J++. What does the buzzword "cutting-edge, proactive, viral accounting" really mean? What does the jargon-based commonly-used standard industry buzzword "proactive versioning" really mean? We will aggregate the term "B2C2B". We always enhance infinitely reconfigurable returns-on-investment. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our TQM but our capacity to harness.