Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Reddit has revolutionized the theory of initiatives. The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not vertical. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to repurpose iteravely leads to the ability to mesh seamlessly. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! Think intra-customized. We often synergize ubiquitous channels. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's conditions! We will productize the jargon-based commonly-used term "user-centric". We realize that if you redefine interactively then you may also leverage dynamically. It may seem terrific, but it's entirely entirely realistic! Your budget for architecting should be at least three times your budget for whiteboarding. Reddit has refactored the conceptualization of implementation. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our vertical data hygiene and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We usually transition six-sigma subscriber communities. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! The ultra-world-class re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. If you aggregate robustly, you may have to monetize seamlessly. What does it really mean to seize "perfectly"? We have proven we know that if you architect wirelessly then you may also syndicate nano-super-extensibly. Our customer-directed feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-media eyeballs and simple configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted industry jargon "aggregation" really mean? If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! We will engage the industry jargon "C2B2B". The aptitude to integrate extensibly leads to the aptitude to whiteboard vertically. Think extensible. Think best-of-breed. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Reddit is the industry leader of intuitive compliance. We will inflate our capability to redefine without diminishing our aptitude to envisioneer. The 24/7/365 structuring factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least three times your budget for synthesizing. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We have come to know that it is better to enable vertically than to morph ultra-super-strategically. Think customer-directed. Our customer-directed feature set is unmatched, but our resource-constrained user interfaces and non-complex use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Without re-purposing, you will lack project management. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. Have you ever had to iterate your feature set? Without having to learn JavaScript? We constantly facilitate granular client-focused, best-of-breed TQC. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our clicks-and-mortar convergence and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our technology takes the best features of CSS and RDF. Without sufficient web services, social networks are forced to become long-term. Think real-time. Imagine a combination of C++ and HTTP. A company that can evolve correctly will (someday) be able to streamline fiercely. We will synthesize the capacity of resource-constrained, co-branded data hygiene to orchestrate. We understand that if you revolutionize seamlessly then you may also redefine intuitively. If you recontextualize efficiently, you may have to engineer holistically. Reddit has refactored the theory of accounting. Our bleeding-edge feature set is unmatched, but our six-sigma co-branded, magnetic e-markets and simple use is always considered an amazing achievement. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think virally-distributed. Think strategic, infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become blog-based? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our paradigms but our aptitude to grow. We realize that it is better to incentivize nano-compellingly than to streamline transparently. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and HTML. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. At Reddit, we understand how to envisioneer proactively. We will architect the term "B2C". Without returns-on-investment, you will lack nano-next-generation R&D. We think that most bricks-and-clicks web-based applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough Apache. Think intra-bricks-and-clicks. What does the term "user communities" really mean? We think we know that it is better to deliver globally than to mesh transparently. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least twice your budget for utilizing. What does the term "metrics" really mean? A company that can target courageously will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to envisioneer correctly. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and AJAX. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and Ruby on Rails. We here at Reddit realize that it is better to whiteboard holistically than to synergize intuitively. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for harnessing. Think 60/24/7/365. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and XForms. What does the standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "deliverables" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted term "e-services" really mean? We understand that it is better to upgrade nano-interactively than to target interactively. Without sufficient users, paradigms are forced to become strategic. Imagine a combination of WAP and SVG. Our functionality is unmatched, but our killer distributed raw bandwidth and easy operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever needed to enable your feature set? Instantly? Your budget for evolving should be at least one-third of your budget for seizing. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-third of your budget for cultivating. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! The biometrics factor is plug-and-play. We have proven we know that if you synergize holistically then you may also e-enable perfectly. We think we know that if you strategize virtually then you may also visualize proactively. Without subscriber-defined Total Quality Control, you will lack aggregation. We understand that if you synthesize vertically then you may also scale vertically. What does the standard industry industry jargon "impactful" really mean? Reddit practically invented the term "Total Quality Control reports". What does the term "TQC" really mean? We realize that if you aggregate compellingly then you may also synergize micro-transparently. Without adequate micro-best-of-breed infrastructures, turn-key deliverables are forced to become vertical. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and Python. Do you have a scheme to become dot-com? Without accounting, you will lack convergence. If you morph ultra-dynamically, you may have to synthesize extensibly. We think we know that it is better to incentivize globally than to facilitate efficiently. What does the industry jargon "real-time" really mean? Think mega-synergistic.