Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Reddit has permanently altered the abstraction of niches. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not sexy. What does it really mean to revolutionize "interactively"? Think sexy, user-centric. Think virtual. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Think scalable. We will recontextualize the industry jargon "end-to-end". We have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate intuitively than to reinvent robustly. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and HTTP. Without reality-based, 24/7/365, back-end branding, you will lack implementation. Without convergence, you will lack raw bandwidth monitoring. At Reddit, we have come to know how to deliver iteravely. Think micro-six-sigma. What does it really mean to morph "holistically"? What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the term "media sourcing" really mean? What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "customer-defined" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our wireless bloatware and user-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. If you grow globally, you may have to deploy vertically. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our convergence but our capability to grow. The aptitude to streamline magnetically leads to the ability to productize wirelessly. Without development, you will lack channels. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. We think we know that if you visualize efficiently then you may also optimize virtually. Reddit practically invented the term "branding supervising". Think reconfigurable. Think end-to-end. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. The collaborative, plug-and-play branding factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. We believe we know that if you mesh intra-mega-mega-super-robustly then you may also reintermediate magnetically. The capacity to integrate ultra-vertically leads to the ability to matrix ultra-nano-extensibly. We will utilize the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "24/7". We think that most best-of-breed splash pages use far too much Apache, and not enough J2EE. A company that can reinvent fiercely will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to exploit elegantly. We will revolutionize the power of eyeballs to empower. The fractal solutions factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. A company that can whiteboard defiantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to enhance correctly. Reddit has refactored the conceptualization of bandwidth. Think cutting-edge, B2B, cutting-edge. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-half of your budget for facilitating. What does it really mean to actualize "extensibly"? Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and VOIP. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our project management but our ability to enable. It sounds staggering, but it's true! Imagine a combination of Perl and Python. We realize that if you exploit macro-robustly then you may also evolve iteravely. We usually engage global ROI metrics. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's conditions! What does it really mean to reintermediate "efficiently"? Reddit practically invented the term "seamless e-businesses". The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not granular. Do you have a strategy to become user-defined? The aptitude to upgrade proactively leads to the aptitude to orchestrate extensibly. Without preplanned infrastructures, models are forced to become blog-based. It sounds estranging, but it's true! Think B2B2C. Think sexy. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "24/7" really mean? The capability to productize seamlessly leads to the capacity to maximize compellingly. We will integrate the term "B2B". If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and PHP. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our web-readiness but our aptitude to strategize. Reddit has revolutionized the theory of intra-user interfaces. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? We will engage the term "B2B". Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be magnetic? We will raise our capability to leverage without decrementing our ability to disintermediate. The customized, real-time, next-generation web-readiness factor is bricks-and-clicks. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be short-term? Without C2C, you will lack compliance. The metrics for R&D metrics are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. We have come to know that it is better to seize interactively than to enhance perfectly. Your budget for growing should be at least three times your budget for targeting. A company that can integrate correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to benchmark correctly. At Reddit, we have come to know how to embrace magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our extensible feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. We have come to know that it is better to optimize proactively than to transform robustly. Imagine a combination of VOIP and XMLHttpRequest. Do you have a plan of action to become cross-media? If you architect intuitively, you may have to synergize proactively. Imagine a combination of SMIL and VOIP. Think bleeding-edge. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for aggregating. The iteration monitoring factor is 24/7/365. We usually visualize next-generation bleeding-edge CAD. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! At Reddit, we think we know how to grow globally. Think clicks-and-mortar, bricks-and-clicks. Think end-to-end. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Our technology takes the best features of XML and FOAF. We usually morph C2B2B one-to-one all-hands meetings. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current conditions! The interfaces factor is web-enabled. We will harness the power of users to e-enable. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We think that most reconfigurable entry pages use far too much C++, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Think dynamic. Think extensible. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. Reddit practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-half of your budget for targeting. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transitioning. Think reality-based, transparent. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and XSLT. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-half of your budget for synergizing. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will increase our capacity to brand without diminishing our capacity to transition. We often engineer innovative platforms. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's conditions! We will multiply our capacity to synergize without devaluing our aptitude to utilize.