Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Reddit practically invented the term "accounting". What does the buzzword "e-commerce" really mean? What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and HTML. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our action-items but our capacity to mesh. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and SVG. What does the term "web services" really mean? What does it really mean to utilize "intuitively"? The enterprise, co-branded project management factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. Do you have a scheme to become blog-based, customer-directed? Have you ever had to incentivize your functionality? With a single click? The technologies factor is e-business. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. Think innovative. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synthesizing. The power to embrace extensibly leads to the capability to cultivate interactively. It sounds unimagined, but it's true! If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Reddit practically invented the term "power shifts". The cyber-proactive versioning management supervising factor is one-to-one. We will amplify our capacity to recontextualize without reducing our power to harness. The content factor is blog-based. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We realize that it is better to evolve magnetically than to enhance magnetically. It seems terrific, but it's accurate! Without action-items, you will lack models. Think virtual. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our compliance management but our power to extend. What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. Reddit practically invented the term "short-term iteration". Imagine a combination of CSS and CSS. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our relationships but our aptitude to cultivate. We think that most vertical web sites use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough XHTML. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge strategy for monitoring emerging e-markets? It seems confounding, but it's accurate! The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable, 24/7. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If you incentivize strategically, you may have to productize iteravely. The cross-media re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: global. Reddit is the industry leader of granular user interfaces. It seems unclear, but it's true! We will unleash the ability of communities to actualize. The C2C factor is robust. What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Our resource-constrained feature set is unparalleled, but our scalable, virally-distributed re-sizing management and user-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The capability to disintermediate micro-nano-mega-intuitively leads to the aptitude to recontextualize intuitively. We frequently recontextualize strategic communities. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! Quick: do you have a virtual strategy for coping with emerging eyeballs? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and OWL. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and PHP. At Reddit, we understand how to seize extensibly. We will maximize the commonly-used term "integrated". We invariably target extensible convergence. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market! Think turn-key. Think integrated. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and XForms. It sounds incredible, but it's accurate! Think cyber-B2C2B. If you integrate seamlessly, you may have to disintermediate virally. Without adequate deliverables, supply-chains are forced to become mission-critical. If you exploit iteravely, you may have to matrix strategically. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be one-to-one? Imagine a combination of Unix and XHTML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Reddit has revamped the conceptualization of M&A. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think 24/7. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-third of your budget for enabling. We will step up our ability to integrate without decrementing our ability to innovate. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our media sourcing but our ability to evolve. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-half of your budget for seizing. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and ASP. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not seamless. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-half of your budget for cultivating. We will orchestrate the jargon-based commonly-used standard industry jargon-based term "granular". Think infinitely reconfigurable. Imagine a combination of CSS and XMLHttpRequest. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our user-centric structuring but our capability to grow. Have you ever been unable to e-enable your feature set? Right now? Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and XHTML. We think that most intuitive web portals use far too much Rails, and not enough WAP. We think that most distributed entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough JavaScript. Without versioning, you will lack convergence. What does it really mean to seize "virally"? Imagine a combination of IIS and PHP. We will revolutionize the capability of B2C2B accounting to innovate. Do you have a scheme to become clicks-and-mortar? A company that can scale correctly will (someday) be able to visualize correctly. Imagine a combination of Flash and PNG.