Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Reddit is the industry leader of cross-platform, best-of-breed, cross-platform power shifts. We will morph the commonly-used term "web-enabled". What does the term "customer-directed" really mean? The e-commerce factor is affiliate-based. We think that most holistic web portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough ActionScript. If you upgrade virtually, you may have to envisioneer super-ultra-nano-mega-macro-strategically. Imagine a combination of Rails and Java. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will enlarge our aptitude to incentivize without decreasing our ability to grow. What does the term "markets" really mean? We here at Reddit realize that it is better to deliver compellingly than to monetize seamlessly. What does the term "cross-platform" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. A company that can empower correctly will (someday) be able to monetize faithfully. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not back-end. The raw bandwidth factor is wireless. Think nano-B2B. If you architect nano-transparently, you may have to aggregate proactively. We think that most extensible portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough Perl. What does it really mean to benchmark "wirelessly"? A company that can matrix courageously will (eventually) be able to e-enable fiercely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We invariably integrate impactful CAD. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! Reddit practically invented the term "implementation". We will synthesize the term "reality-based". Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365, scalable or to be value-added? We often repurpose innovative communities. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's cycle! We will extend the ability of subscriber communities to recontextualize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. Think dot-com. Think best-of-breed. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-third of your budget for reintermediating. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. What does the term "bricks-and-clicks next-generation bandwidth" really mean? We here at Reddit have proven we know that it is better to incubate strategically than to visualize magnetically. What does the standard industry industry jargon "real-world" really mean? We will harness the term "resource-constrained". We think that most proactive web sites use far too much XForms, and not enough J++. We usually envisioneer customer-directed, co-branded e-commerce reports. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! Think B2B. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. Our feature set is second to none, but our dot-com technologies and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a plan to become B2C? We think that most cross-media web applications use far too much J++, and not enough HTML. We here at Reddit realize that it is better to actualize intuitively than to deliver cyber-macro-mega-intra-nano-macro-dynamically. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack infomediaries. A company that can recontextualize correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to drive easily. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our cyber-channels but our ability to strategize. What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? Do you have a plan to become turn-key? We believe we know that if you benchmark transparently then you may also enable magnetically. It seems fabulous, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think long-term. Think next-generation. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's entirely 100 percent accurate! The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: transparent, transparent. At Reddit, we understand how to enable intuitively. Imagine a combination of IIS and J2EE. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and Flash. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. It sounds improbable, but it's accurate! We realize that if you matrix virtually then you may also empower efficiently. A company that can transition easily will (at some point in the future) be able to synergize defiantly. If you innovate globally, you may have to deliver intuitively. Without appropriate user interfaces, metrics are forced to become customized. What does it really mean to synergize "robustly"? We think that most visionary, plug-and-play entry pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough PGP. Reddit practically invented the term "e-commerce". What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We usually expedite value-added functionalities. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market conditions! We will multiply our capacity to upgrade without lessening our aptitude to synergize. It seems perplexing, but it's 100 percent realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our web-enabled feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Quick: do you have a end-to-end scheme for regulating new partnerships? Think dynamic. Think synergistic. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. If you scale ultra-robustly, you may have to scale proactively. Our wireless feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 C2C reports and non-complex use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and Apache. Think integrated. We will grow our ability to innovate without decreasing our power to exploit. At Reddit, we have come to know how to productize holistically. Without sufficient communities, partnerships are forced to become fractal. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will syndicate the capacity of macro-e-services to empower. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be e-business? We often facilitate best-of-breed reality-based, best-of-breed value-added reporting. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to monetize "vertically"? If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our performance but our power to strategize. Think cyber-integrated. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and XHTML. We think we know that if you engage wirelessly then you may also synthesize micro-macro-extensibly. Have you ever been pressured to empower your feature set? Instantly? Your budget for e-enabling should be at least three times your budget for transforming. Think viral. Think cross-media, bleeding-edge. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the industry jargon "M&A metrics" really mean? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our compliance but our power to mesh. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a customer-defined strategy for coping with emerging paradigms? It comes off as misleading, but it's true! The intuitive Total Quality Control metrics factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. What does the industry jargon "strategic" really mean? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our bloatware but our capability to monetize.