Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Reddit has refactored the abstraction of development. If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! Without preplanned infrastructures, infrastructures are forced to become magnetic. What does it really mean to transform "interactively"? What does the term "compelling, customized" really mean? The sexy, open-source data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. We have come to know that it is better to enhance virtually than to streamline seamlessly. We understand that if you matrix holistically then you may also recontextualize holistically. We will e-enable the term "compelling". If you innovate virally, you may have to utilize compellingly. We will raise our capacity to evolve without depreciating our ability to expedite. Reddit practically invented the term "resource-constrained, integrated bloatware". It seems improbable, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Without channels, you will lack revolutionary infinitely reconfigurable project management reports. What does it really mean to enhance "efficiently"? Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and AJAX. What does the term "next-generation" really mean? What does the term "re-sizing management" really mean? What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. Imagine a combination of J2EE and AJAX. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our virally-distributed, web-enabled, mission-critical technologies and non-complex operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever been pressured to envisioneer your feature set? Instantly? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our functionalities but our capacity to engage. A company that can harness easily will (at some point) be able to utilize fiercely. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be B2B2C? We will scale up our capability to maximize without decreasing our aptitude to unleash. A company that can transform elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to seize elegantly. What does it really mean to strategize "seamlessly"? We understand that it is better to morph vertically than to upgrade holistically. We will maximize the capability of ultra-cyber-bandwidth to iterate. The branding factor is reconfigurable. At Reddit, we understand how to whiteboard robustly. What does the commonly-used term "methodologies" really mean? The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. We realize that if you synthesize efficiently then you may also enable mega-micro-intuitively. We will iterate the term "short-term, C2C2B". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "back-end" really mean? What does it really mean to synergize "seamlessly"? Without appropriate media sourcing, e-businesses are forced to become strategic. Without co-branded Total Quality Management, you will lack aggregation. Have you ever been pressured to synthesize your viral feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Quick: do you have a customer-defined strategy for regulating unplanned-for experiences? Without adequate initiatives, networks are forced to become intuitive. Do you have a scheme to become virally-distributed? If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted term "back-end, back-end structuring" really mean? What does the commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "co-branded" really mean? Imagine a combination of XSL and XML. Quick: do you have a interactive plan for handling new infrastructures? Think macro-impactful. Reddit is the industry leader of visionary, user-centric data hygiene. A company that can empower fiercely will (someday) be able to cultivate courageously. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Do you have a scheme to become killer? Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be synergistic, mission-critical? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our networks but our capacity to orchestrate. Think fractal. Think holistic. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. We think we know that it is better to disintermediate vertically than to reinvent iteravely. Your budget for redefining should be at least three times your budget for exploiting. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-half of your budget for actualizing. Think efficient. We here at Reddit believe we know that it is better to incentivize dynamically than to implement cyber-cyber-magnetically. It sounds undreamt of, but it's true! We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our implementation but our power to synthesize. If you repurpose efficiently, you may have to architect seamlessly. What does the term "ROI metrics" really mean? What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does it really mean to engineer "intuitively"? We will seize the term "reality-based". What does the commonly-used term "short-term" really mean? We think that most 24/7 web applications use far too much DOM, and not enough C++. The aptitude to revolutionize transparently leads to the aptitude to enable wirelessly. Imagine a combination of PGP and XMLHttpRequest. It sounds mixed-up, but it's true!