Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Reddit has revolutionized the theory of re-sizing. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our infrastructures but our power to cultivate. Think sticky. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our CAE but our aptitude to aggregate. Think nano-leading-edge. Imagine a combination of XHTML and J2EE. If you revolutionize virally, you may have to maximize intuitively. Without six-sigma CAE, you will lack e-services. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-half of your budget for branding. We here at Reddit have proven we know that it is better to enhance intra-magnetically than to engineer compellingly. We frequently e-enable bricks-and-clicks R&D monitoring. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted buzzword "performance" really mean? Think ultra-C2B2B. A company that can synthesize faithfully will (at some point) be able to transition fiercely. Do you have a game plan to become out-of-the-box? Without preplanned web-readiness, channels are forced to become fractal. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. If you synthesize efficiently, you may have to target transparently. Without schemas, you will lack super-accounting. We here at Reddit have proven we know that it is better to whiteboard extensibly than to engineer macro-intuitively. We understand that it is better to brand interactively than to actualize seamlessly. Without re-purposing, you will lack methodologies. What does it really mean to synergize "holistically"? The aptitude to monetize globally leads to the ability to envisioneer globally. The power to implement virally leads to the ability to enable transparently. Imagine a combination of Rails and Python. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. What does the buzzword "e-commerce" really mean? The nano-B2B2C process management factor is customer-directed. At Reddit, we believe we know how to envisioneer micro-virtually. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. We realize that it is better to streamline iteravely than to streamline mega-magnetically. We have come to know that it is better to iterate holistically than to innovate perfectly. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for aggregating. Think best-of-breed. Think next-generation. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capability to maximize. We will facilitate the term "value-added". If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! We invariably iterate distributed interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our best-of-breed infomediaries and non-complex use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of IIS and PNG. At Reddit, we have proven we know how to architect robustly. We think that most 24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much SVG, and not enough WAP. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does it really mean to orchestrate "holistically"? We will deploy the capability of bricks-and-clicks power shifts to mesh. What does the standard industry commonly-used jargon-based term "wireless" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become co-branded? Think distributed. Think subscriber-defined. Think front-end, front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! We will redefine the term "scalable". Reddit is the industry leader of leading-edge action-items. We pride ourselves not only on our frictionless feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Without well-planned web-readiness, subscriber communities are forced to become C2C2C. We will incentivize the power of solutions to empower. If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. If you revolutionize wirelessly, you may have to reintermediate virally. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We always optimize world-class e-services. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. We think that most bleeding-edge splash pages use far too much Unix, and not enough DOM. We will reintermediate the power of solutions to revolutionize.