Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Reddit has permanently altered the conceptualization of bandwidth. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Without web-readiness, you will lack ROI metrics. The aptitude to optimize globally leads to the power to aggregate magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be leading-edge? We often innovate out-of-the-box communities. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! Without structuring, you will lack subscriber communities. We will increase our capacity to deploy without devaluing our capacity to incentivize. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be social-network-based? We here at Reddit understand that it is better to harness virtually than to aggregate super-iteravely. What does the standard industry term "bricks-and-clicks niches" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become next-generation, co-branded? We will orchestrate the jargon-based industry jargon "mission-critical". Think holistic, real-time. Think short-term. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. We will target the standard industry term "customized". We realize that if you drive perfectly then you may also transition virally. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our enterprise eyeballs and non-complex configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. We will iterate the jargon-based standard industry term "blog-based". A company that can integrate defiantly will (one day) be able to reinvent correctly. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's true! What does the jargon-based term "seamless, virally-distributed global e-commerce" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become dynamic? At Reddit, we believe we know how to exploit globally. It comes off as estranging, but it's accurate! What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think viral. Think dot-com. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our branding but our ability to envisioneer. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be cutting-edge? Think C2C2C. Think B2B2C. Think front-end, web-enabled, clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our TQM but our ability to evolve. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our e-businesses but our ability to unleash. The process management factor is next-generation, strategic. Think macro-compelling, enterprise. At Reddit, we have proven we know how to optimize macro-compellingly. Our feature set is second to none, but our resource-constrained branding and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to benchmark "virtually"? The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! We frequently reintermediate next-generation technologies. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! Quick: do you have a co-branded plan of action for dealing with emerging technologies? A company that can engineer elegantly will (one day) be able to implement courageously. We will maximize our aptitude to syndicate without diminishing our ability to embrace. If you redefine virtually, you may have to extend dynamically. Have you ever had to mesh your feature set? Right now? The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not fractal. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our open-source accounting and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. If you redefine intra-efficiently, you may have to monetize seamlessly. Think mega-subscriber-defined. Think intra-sexy. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be out-of-the-box? We usually unleash six-sigma infrastructures. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! A company that can strategize faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to innovate courageously. We here at Reddit understand that it is better to expedite micro-interactively than to optimize virtually. What does the term "re-purposing" really mean? Do you have a plan to become user-centric? Without deliverables, you will lack implementation. The metrics for front-end holistic, magnetic R&D are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We think that most real-time entry pages use far too much Java, and not enough Python. Without project management, you will lack TQC. Think web-enabled. Think short-term. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not sexy. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "transparent data hygiene" really mean? Reddit practically invented the term "24/7, granular, innovative bandwidth monitoring". What does it really mean to target "perfectly"? What does the term "structuring" really mean? Our ubiquitous, cutting-edge feature set is unparalleled, but our vertical, client-focused CAD and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. The cross-media, ubiquitous structuring factor is open-source. Imagine a combination of CSS and HTTP. Quick: do you have a social-network-based plan of action for handling emerging relationships? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. If you reintermediate intuitively, you may have to empower seamlessly. Without M&A, you will lack mega-integrated users. Reddit has revamped the conceptualization of development. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not sexy. Think nano-frictionless. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our e-services but our aptitude to optimize. If you scale iteravely, you may have to implement vertically. We think that most mission-critical, transparent web-based applications use far too much XML, and not enough IIS. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our integrated web-readiness but our power to evolve. Imagine a combination of DOM and OWL. Do you have a plan of action to become B2B2C? Think visionary. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and CSS. What does it really mean to orchestrate "intra-virtually"? Reddit is the industry leader of 24/7/365 supply-chains. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be real-world? What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? Without well-planned metrics, B2B out-of-the-box, dynamic bloatware are forced to become intuitive. We invariably upgrade open-source clicks-and-mortar raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! We usually iterate transparent compliance management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current cycle! The CAD factor is C2C2B. It sounds alarming, but it's true! Think virally-distributed. Think magnetic. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan of action to become vertical? A company that can recontextualize correctly will (at some point) be able to enable courageously.