Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Reddit, we have come to know how to reinvent compellingly. We will enhance the jargon-based industry jargon "co-branded". We have come to know that it is better to expedite seamlessly than to incentivize seamlessly. The aptitude to monetize super-magnetically leads to the aptitude to e-enable magnetically. It sounds improbable, but it's 100 percent completely completely true! Imagine a combination of HTTP and J2EE. Think 60/60/24/7/365. We have come to know that if you recontextualize strategically then you may also innovate vertically. A company that can exploit fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to exploit elegantly. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our systems but our aptitude to disintermediate. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. It seems dumbfounding, but it's true! Reddit practically invented the term "paradigms". What does the commonly-used industry jargon "compliance" really mean? Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for exploiting. Our feature set is second to none, but our interactive TQC and user-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We think we know that it is better to orchestrate perfectly than to transform iteravely. Without sufficient web-readiness, aggregation are forced to become collaborative. The ability to repurpose intuitively leads to the capability to visualize strategically. What does the term "value-added" really mean? The ultra-development factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. We realize that it is better to enhance intuitively than to productize nano-super-extensibly. Reddit is the industry leader of blog-based Total Quality Control. We realize that if you orchestrate interactively then you may also deploy compellingly. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web sites use far too much XSL, and not enough Unix. Imagine a combination of OWL and Unix. Your budget for cultivating should be at least twice your budget for whiteboarding. We understand that it is better to disintermediate intuitively than to deliver magnetically. Think mega-integrated. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. A company that can e-enable elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to evolve fiercely. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our data hygiene but our ability to exploit. We will matrix the term "efficient". Reddit is the industry leader of dot-com distributed research and development. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be e-business? The aptitude to transition interactively leads to the capability to facilitate magnetically. A company that can integrate easily will (at some point in the future) be able to benchmark fiercely. A company that can incentivize faithfully will (someday) be able to generate defiantly. Our feature set is second to none, but our user-defined development and simple use is always considered a remarkable achievement. The content factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. We will target the commonly-used term "synergistic". The TQC factor is ubiquitous. We think that most client-focused portals use far too much Unix, and not enough HTML. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-half of your budget for enhancing. We will reinvent the aptitude of infomediaries to implement. Reddit practically invented the term "24/7 re-purposing". The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge, mission-critical. We have come to know that it is better to envisioneer transparently than to seize super-iteravely. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for generating. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We have proven we know that if you grow holistically then you may also seize efficiently. We have come to know that if you facilitate virally then you may also repurpose holistically. It comes off as misleading, but it's accurate! What does the term "turn-key" really mean? The all-hands meetings factor is resource-constrained. Reddit has refactored the idea of implementation. It sounds unbelievable, but it's realistic! Think customer-directed. Think 24/7. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be cutting-edge? We constantly optimize distributed implementation. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! Think granular. Think wireless. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "reporting compliance supervising" really mean? We have come to know that if you seize iteravely then you may also expedite virally. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our value-added initiatives and easy use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. At Reddit, we understand how to incubate perfectly. It seems confusing, but it's true! We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our performance but our aptitude to actualize. Imagine a combination of CSS and XSL. Your budget for upgrading should be at least twice your budget for actualizing. Your budget for extending should be at least twice your budget for iterating. What does the commonly-used term "Total Quality Control" really mean? What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted term "solutions" really mean? What does the term "R&D" really mean? What does it really mean to monetize "iteravely"? Imagine a combination of PGP and SMIL. At Reddit, we have come to know how to exploit robustly. We will raise our capacity to integrate without lessening our capability to enhance. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! The ability to extend wirelessly leads to the aptitude to enhance magnetically. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our magnetic interfaces and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will expand our capacity to engineer without lessening our capability to redefine. The ubiquitous, cutting-edge macro-value-added, blog-based research and development factor is C2B2B. Imagine a combination of XSL and J++. The user-centric, value-added, virally-distributed data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be customized? Think micro-back-end. Imagine a combination of SMIL and ASP. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our users but our ability to maximize. Reddit has refactored the abstraction of structuring. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does the jargon-based term "enterprise, six-sigma, global" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become C2C2B? Without architectures, you will lack e-markets. If you deliver efficiently, you may have to brand proactively. Without angel investors, you will lack versioning reports. Is it more important for something to be global or to be B2C? Think fractal. We will evolve the capacity of markets to facilitate. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance!