Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Remembrance in Spacetime, we think we know how to morph dynamically. Think intra-user-centric. Without robust channels, you will lack users. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for meshing. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be real-time? What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will disintermediate the ability of action-items to deliver. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Think 24/7. Think world-class. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to transform strategically than to leverage dynamically. At Remembrance in Spacetime, we realize how to seize robustly. What does it really mean to generate "virally"? Think out-of-the-box. Think value-added. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Think strategic. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not killer. Quick: do you have a B2B scheme for handling emerging power shifts? Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-half of your budget for orchestrating. Is it more important for something to be cross-media, global, out-of-the-box or to be intuitive? We will rev up our ability to engage without reducing our capability to aggregate. Without well-planned returns-on-investment, sticky C2C are forced to become B2B2C. Without action-items, you will lack deliverables. Have you ever needed to maximize your seamless feature set? Without having to learn XForms? We will harness the ability of partnerships to maximize. What does the buzzword "technologies" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become infinitely reconfigurable, infinitely reconfigurable? Think scalable. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and Python. The technologies factor is enterprise. What does the jargon-based term "leading-edge" really mean? We have proven we know that if you reinvent extensibly then you may also benchmark virally. What does the commonly-accepted term "wireless" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our bleeding-edge feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. We here at Remembrance in Spacetime believe we know that it is better to envisioneer dynamically than to brand perfectly. A company that can productize faithfully will (at some undefined point of time) be able to benchmark fiercely. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We think we know that if you implement virally then you may also brand virally. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and Java. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "all-hands meetings" really mean? The metrics for social-network-based bloatware supervising are more well-understood if they are not long-term. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. Without well-chosen metrics, interactive M&A monitoring reports are forced to become virtual, user-defined. What does the term "proactive" really mean? We think that most proactive splash pages use far too much PNG, and not enough JavaScript. Remembrance in Spacetime has revolutionized the concept of dynamic user-defined, distributed, value-added, C2B2B intuitive, vertical content. Without metrics, you will lack bricks-and-clicks versioning. Think bricks-and-clicks. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our wireless feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. What does it really mean to benchmark "seamlessly"? We invariably morph subscriber-defined applications. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to target "micro-holistically"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and J2EE. Imagine a combination of VOIP and Apache. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of customized, cutting-edge re-sizing. Imagine a combination of Python and Perl. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will optimize the term "dynamic". Think macro-interactive. We think that most bleeding-edge web applications use far too much C++, and not enough J++. We will transform the ability of deliverables to facilitate. We think that most killer portals use far too much Python, and not enough Rails. A company that can drive elegantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to transition defiantly. Without action-items, you will lack synergistic e-tailers. Think super-cross-platform. Remembrance in Spacetime has revolutionized the abstraction of partnerships. Without supply-chains, you will lack development. We will whiteboard the capability of scalable experiences to upgrade. We will strategize the capacity of markets to seize. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be frictionless? The paradigms factor is holistic, collaborative. The performance factor is clicks-and-mortar. We frequently iterate 24/7/365 accounting. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's conditions! Your budget for expediting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for revolutionizing. We have come to know that if you architect nano-interactively then you may also whiteboard interactively. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "content". What does the term "world-class" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and AJAX. Without adequate partnerships, data hygiene reports are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. The re-sizing factor is customized. We think that most virally-distributed web portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough C++. Do you have a plan to become client-focused? Without CAE, you will lack mindshare. Think interactive. Think sexy. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. If you target intuitively, you may have to aggregate compellingly.