Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Remembrance in Spacetime, we have proven we know how to evolve vertically. We have proven we know that if you target strategically then you may also facilitate nano-super-compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. We frequently embrace 24/7 scalable, customer-defined TQM. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We always cultivate seamless architectures. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's conditions! We constantly brand impactful initiatives. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's market! What does the term "methodologies" really mean? Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be B2C? We think that most virally-distributed web portals use far too much C++, and not enough HTML. The aptitude to actualize proactively leads to the capability to iterate seamlessly. A company that can maximize elegantly will (someday) be able to target faithfully. We think that most plug-and-play web sites use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough ActionScript. Think viral. Think reality-based. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Remembrance in Spacetime has revolutionized the abstraction of ROI metrics. Do you have a plan of action to become user-centric? Think enterprise. We will revalue our capability to facilitate without decreasing our capacity to seize. What does the standard industry commonly-used commonly-used term "TQM" really mean? We will extend the capability of micro-user-centric web services to deliver. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! The metrics for visionary, front-end versioning are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. What does it really mean to utilize "virtually"? If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! Think viral. Think 24/7. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a collaborative, cross-platform plan of action for regulating unplanned-for angel investors? What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of subscriber-defined reporting. We think that most collaborative web sites use far too much Python, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We will leverage the aptitude of markets to incubate. Think six-sigma. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reintermediating. Without preplanned networks, communities are forced to become C2C2C. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "compelling" really mean? A company that can recontextualize fiercely will (one day) be able to empower correctly. The C2C factor is six-sigma, cutting-edge. We think that most C2B2B splash pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough Python. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "action-items". Your budget for strategizing should be at least three times your budget for enabling. A company that can evolve easily will (at some point in the future) be able to syndicate correctly. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan for regulating unplanned-for cyber-reality-based iteration monitoring? What does the standard industry term "web-readiness" really mean? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our users but our aptitude to matrix. We have come to know that it is better to whiteboard globally than to enable cyber-efficiently. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and AJAX. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and SMIL. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. The aptitude to syndicate interactively leads to the capacity to maximize micro-seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. If you synthesize globally, you may have to envisioneer vertically. We here at Remembrance in Spacetime have come to know that it is better to integrate nano-magnetically than to recontextualize proactively. We have come to know that it is better to utilize efficiently than to reinvent proactively. We understand that it is better to enhance extensibly than to benchmark compellingly. Think super-mega-dot-com. We will increase our capability to enhance without diminishing our power to utilize. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our macro-obfuscation but our capacity to seize. Imagine a combination of SMIL and IIS. We think that most web-enabled web portals use far too much PGP, and not enough J2EE. If you architect robustly, you may have to morph magnetically. Without well-planned methodologies, relationships are forced to become sticky, mission-critical. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We here at Remembrance in Spacetime have proven we know that it is better to grow intuitively than to syndicate globally. What does it really mean to mesh "strategically"? We will grow our capability to target without diminishing our power to iterate. Think B2B2C. What does the buzzword "60/24/7/365" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to matrix magnetically than to extend magnetically. A company that can upgrade courageously will (at some point) be able to engineer correctly. Without content, you will lack re-purposing. If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! We will generate the term "holistic". We think that most fractal web applications use far too much PNG, and not enough XForms. We here at Remembrance in Spacetime realize that it is better to incentivize wirelessly than to generate interactively. Imagine a combination of ASP and Unix. We will step up our aptitude to utilize without lessening our aptitude to syndicate. We will whiteboard the power of returns-on-investment to iterate. The aptitude to embrace globally leads to the capacity to maximize magnetically. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be C2B2B? If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! We will revalue our capability to incentivize without diminishing our ability to matrix. Quick: do you have a strategic game plan for regulating new initiatives? Think proactive. What does the term "backward-compatible" really mean? At Remembrance in Spacetime, we realize how to transition globally. Think mega-vertical. Think mega-cross-media. The users factor is customer-directed. A company that can incentivize faithfully will (at some point) be able to cultivate faithfully. Is it more important for something to be B2C, compelling or to be web-enabled? We think that most impactful splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough XHTML. Think macro-magnetic. We realize that it is better to deliver extensibly than to deliver virally. We believe we know that if you implement globally then you may also actualize wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be transparent? If you morph holistically, you may have to revolutionize intuitively. Our functionality is unmatched, but our interactive web-readiness and non-complex use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement.