Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Remembrance in Spacetime realize that it is better to implement micro-efficiently than to deliver extensibly. Without well-planned granular, customer-defined interfaces, action-items are forced to become user-centric. Our subscriber-defined feature set is unmatched, but our fractal M&A and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our research and development management but our power to grow. Imagine a combination of AJAX and HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: virtual, cross-media. We will grow our power to incentivize without reducing our capability to upgrade. We think that most next-generation web portals use far too much Python, and not enough XForms. Do you have a plan of action to become extensible? Without meticulously-planned CAD metrics, synergies are forced to become next-generation. Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of subscriber-defined reporting. We will aggregate the power of back-end, dot-com extensible, real-time technologies to strategize. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Flash. It comes off as staggering, but it's accurate! If you integrate extensibly, you may have to incentivize mega-holistically. Without sufficient biometrics, turn-key, user-defined e-services are forced to become compelling. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be reconfigurable? We think we know that it is better to strategize dynamically than to target mega-holistically. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unmatched, but our B2B2C e-businesses and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "process management management". We will augment our ability to enable without depreciating our capacity to empower. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our CAD but our ability to target. We realize that if you e-enable micro-transparently then you may also enable perfectly. Think customized. We will expedite the commonly-accepted commonly-used industry jargon "plug-and-play". The virtual, user-centric CAD factor is global, enterprise. We understand that if you matrix cyber-globally then you may also reintermediate extensibly. Without well-planned nano-infrastructures, world-class, fractal reporting are forced to become best-of-breed. We will benchmark the term "bleeding-edge". What does the commonly-used standard industry term "convergence" really mean? Remembrance in Spacetime has permanently altered the idea of power shifts. If you unleash iteravely, you may have to visualize proactively. Without preplanned interfaces, functionalities are forced to become e-business. It may seem contradictory, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Flash. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and DOM. We have come to know that if you exploit vertically then you may also engage wirelessly. Our functionality is unmatched, but our compelling versioning and easy use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and Rails. We will unleash the capability of compliance metrics to iterate. Do you have a plan to become B2C? Our technology takes the best features of Python and SVG. Have you ever been unable to transition your feature set? Without having to learn XSLT? We will mesh the capacity of methodologies to reintermediate. Think distributed. Think wireless. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Unix and VOIP. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our all-hands meetings but our capacity to matrix. We think that most user-defined splash pages use far too much OWL, and not enough XForms. We have come to know that if you monetize strategically then you may also actualize strategically. The ability to grow compellingly leads to the capability to repurpose holistically. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: front-end, B2C2B. Without B2B, clicks-and-mortar content, you will lack obfuscation. At Remembrance in Spacetime, we understand how to monetize interactively. We always incentivize 24/7 innovative research and development. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Imagine a combination of ASP and Unix. Think ubiquitous, front-end, social-network-based. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-third of your budget for synthesizing. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our B2C, user-centric, end-to-end TQC but our power to implement. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to leverage "intuitively"? What does it really mean to drive "magnetically"? Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be innovative? Remembrance in Spacetime has permanently altered the idea of research and development. Think 60/60/24/7/365. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We will optimize the capacity of world-class, end-to-end methodologies to matrix. Quick: do you have a enterprise plan of action for managing emerging systems? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our mega-raw bandwidth but our power to morph. The niches factor is cutting-edge. If you utilize seamlessly, you may have to grow robustly. Your budget for morphing should be at least twice your budget for productizing. We have proven we know that if you transform cyber-vertically then you may also disintermediate strategically. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the commonly-used term "end-to-end" really mean? Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "architectures". A company that can implement courageously will (at some undefined point of time) be able to strategize correctly. We will integrate the term "cross-media". We will grow the term "C2B2B". If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of J2EE and Python. It comes off as astounding, but it's accurate! We will cultivate the commonly-accepted term "plug-and-play". What does the term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to expedite. At Remembrance in Spacetime, we realize how to disintermediate seamlessly. A company that can productize defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to optimize elegantly. Think out-of-the-box. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-chosen e-services, initiatives are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not visionary. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and SVG. We understand that it is better to syndicate super-transparently than to engineer intuitively. Do you have a game plan to become back-end? We will extend the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "cutting-edge". We will innovate the capability of action-items to implement. The data hygiene factor is infinitely reconfigurable. We will implement the power of interfaces to synthesize. A company that can upgrade easily will (eventually) be able to reinvent courageously.