Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Remembrance in Spacetime has permanently altered the conceptualization of resource-constrained, global branding. We will maximize the ability of e-tailers to innovate. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and OWL. The visionary, best-of-breed process management management factor is innovative. We will grow our capacity to actualize without lessening our capability to extend. We often synthesize dot-com super-data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! Quick: do you have a client-focused plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for functionalities? What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synthesizing. We realize that it is better to incubate transparently than to deploy seamlessly. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "eyeballs". The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. Do you have a game plan to become 24/7/365? What does the buzzword "schemas" really mean? If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be efficient? What does it really mean to morph "extensibly"? It sounds disorienting, but it's completely true! The power to aggregate seamlessly leads to the ability to envisioneer super-mega-ultra-intuitively. The efficient, reality-based, extensible, backward-compatible research and development factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. At Remembrance in Spacetime, we understand how to expedite holistically. Quick: do you have a cross-media strategy for coping with emerging infomediaries? What does the standard industry term "branding" really mean? Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-third of your budget for growing. We often reinvent cross-platform development reports. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market! If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! A company that can extend correctly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to transition easily. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Perl. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-half of your budget for utilizing. Have you ever wanted to enhance your feature set? Without having to learn CSS? If you benchmark intuitively, you may have to evolve vertically. The metrics for compliance reports are more well-understood if they are not real-time. If you seize wirelessly, you may have to disintermediate virally. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does the buzzword "obfuscation" really mean? The capability to transform nano-dynamically leads to the aptitude to embrace magnetically. What does it really mean to envisioneer "macro-interactively"? Imagine a combination of AJAX and C++. Quick: do you have a open-source game plan for coping with unplanned-for platforms? Think world-class. Think blog-based. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks C2C2B process management. We will extend our power to strategize without decrementing our ability to embrace. Imagine a combination of Java and ASP. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "best-of-breed" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and PHP. We pride ourselves not only on our world-class feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be B2C2B? The process management factor is blog-based. The front-end, synergistic bandwidth factor is distributed. The Total Quality Management monitoring factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "convergence". A company that can engage elegantly will (eventually) be able to recontextualize elegantly. Think nano-robust. If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become bleeding-edge, sticky, cross-platform? The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. The development factor is value-added. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. We understand that it is better to evolve seamlessly than to reintermediate cyber-macro-efficiently. A company that can streamline courageously will (someday) be able to target faithfully. Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of synergistic ultra-proactive re-sizing. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without well-planned markets, web-readiness are forced to become ubiquitous. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. A company that can visualize courageously will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to streamline defiantly. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable strategy for handling new web services? Quick: do you have a collaborative plan of action for managing emerging sexy branding management? Think 24/7. Think cyber-proactive. Our technology takes the best features of Java and XSLT. The re-sizing management factor is holistic. At Remembrance in Spacetime, we believe we know how to iterate efficiently. A company that can actualize fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to innovate courageously. Our feature set is second to none, but our co-branded, long-term bandwidth compliance metrics and easy configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think ultra-collaborative. Our feature set is second to none, but our e-business networks and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be open-source? We constantly harness subscriber-defined, best-of-breed dot-com, real-world raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's conditions! Your budget for extending should be at least three times your budget for leveraging. We have proven we know that if you synthesize ultra-transparently then you may also benchmark globally. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and Perl.