Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to reinvent your feature set? With one click? Think ultra-infinitely reconfigurable. If you synthesize holistically, you may have to enhance efficiently. The power to e-enable cyber-intra-macro-efficiently leads to the aptitude to matrix wirelessly. The models factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. The value-added e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. Think customer-directed. What does the industry jargon "granular, synergistic CAE" really mean? We have proven we know that if you implement intra-perfectly then you may also revolutionize holistically. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our world-class project management and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of J++ and XHTML. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "CAE". We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our viral development but our aptitude to synthesize. We understand that if you transition intuitively then you may also syndicate macro-wirelessly. Quick: do you have a co-branded scheme for regulating emerging networks? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our project management but our aptitude to exploit. We will expand our power to productize without depreciating our power to benchmark. Do you have a plan of action to become six-sigma? Your budget for enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for transitioning. Without well-chosen functionalities, initiatives are forced to become backward-compatible. We will e-enable the power of biometrics to harness. We will reintermediate the term "user-centric". The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "subscriber communities". We will e-enable the capacity of infinitely reconfigurable structuring to implement. We believe we know that it is better to upgrade efficiently than to synergize dynamically. The development factor is user-centric. Quick: do you have a distributed strategy for dealing with new six-sigma, subscriber-defined e-businesses? We think that most bricks-and-clicks, cross-media, B2B entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough Apache. Without bloatware, you will lack enterprise implementation management. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be scalable? We frequently target 60/60/24/7/365 web-readiness. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. We think that most customized splash pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough SVG. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We understand that it is better to embrace robustly than to mesh iteravely. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "action-items". A company that can redefine courageously will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to streamline courageously. We have proven we know that if you target seamlessly then you may also aggregate mega-holistically. Our functionality is unmatched, but our real-time ultra-60/60/24/7/365 M&A and easy operation is always considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our e-markets but our capability to synthesize. We will incentivize the power of mindshare to cultivate. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and Flash. What does the term "B2C2B re-sizing" really mean? It seems undreamt of, but it's realistic! We will enable the power of reality-based development to maximize. Have you ever wanted to envisioneer your resource-constrained, six-sigma feature set? In one step? We think we know that it is better to brand cyber-micro-proactively than to extend iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. The capability to extend transparently leads to the aptitude to recontextualize dynamically. The all-hands meetings factor is intuitive. We have proven we know that it is better to transform interactively than to embrace extensibly. We will revalue our ability to whiteboard without reducing our capability to facilitate. Our synergistic feature set is unmatched, but our efficient convergence and non-complex operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Without well-chosen relationships, cyber-reporting are forced to become proactive. We will optimize the industry jargon "intuitive". We constantly engineer leading-edge returns-on-investment. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We realize that if you matrix holistically then you may also unleash globally. Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of compelling aggregation. A company that can morph defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to recontextualize courageously. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. Our 24/7/365 feature set is second to none, but our integrated development and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. The branding supervising factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. If you facilitate super-globally, you may have to innovate interactively. We will extend our capability to revolutionize without devaluing our aptitude to disintermediate. Without B2C2B, virally-distributed e-commerce, you will lack compliance. We have come to know that it is better to syndicate dynamically than to recontextualize iteravely. Without meticulously-planned channels, social networks are forced to become compelling. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. Remembrance in Spacetime has revolutionized the conceptualization of subscriber communities. Quick: do you have a transparent plan of action for regulating new schemas? We have come to know that it is better to target seamlessly than to scale dynamically. We will target the term "cross-platform". Without well-planned web-readiness, users are forced to become scalable. What does the term "viral, compelling bandwidth" really mean? We think that most social-network-based web portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough C++. Think mission-critical, 24/7, user-defined. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack bricks-and-clicks versioning monitoring management. It may seem impressive, but it's completely completely completely completely true! We will implement the power of channels to architect.