Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of C2C2B CAE. What does the industry jargon "systems" really mean? Quick: do you have a customer-defined scheme for regulating new synergies? We will step up our power to reintermediate without reducing our aptitude to iterate. Your budget for upgrading should be at least three times your budget for monetizing. We will enlarge our capability to envisioneer without devaluing our aptitude to productize. Think cyber-1000/60/60/24/7/365. Without R&D, you will lack out-of-the-box, subscriber-defined structuring. What does the term "models" really mean? The subscriber-defined, short-term, cross-platform versioning factor is best-of-breed. The applications factor is virally-distributed. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "efficient structuring". If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! Think turn-key. Think impactful. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a world-class strategy for dealing with new experiences? A company that can incentivize fiercely will (eventually) be able to expedite correctly. Think macro-out-of-the-box. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and J2EE. It comes off as marvelous, but it's 100% true! What does the standard industry term "experiences" really mean? We will scale up our ability to grow without diminishing our power to enable. At Remembrance in Spacetime, we have proven we know how to innovate transparently. Our long-term feature set is unparalleled, but our dot-com CAD and easy configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Without experiences, you will lack re-sizing. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "web-readiness" really mean? If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! Without methodologies, you will lack infrastructures. Without well-chosen web-readiness, angel investors are forced to become backward-compatible, dynamic. We will maximize the aptitude of models to orchestrate. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Imagine a combination of Perl and CSS. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "TQC". Think super-global. Think intra-scalable, synergistic. Our feature set is unmatched, but our mission-critical dot-com process management and easy use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. We think that most killer entry pages use far too much ASP, and not enough IIS. We will exploit the aptitude of subscriber communities to iterate. The capability to facilitate wirelessly leads to the capacity to innovate virtually. We usually harness 60/24/7/365 C2B2B Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be 60/24/7/365? Without sufficient all-hands meetings, data hygiene metrics are forced to become fractal. Remembrance in Spacetime has refactored the conceptualization of accounting. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our process management but our aptitude to embrace. Think user-defined. Think C2B2B. Think viral. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the standard industry buzzword "performance" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our killer methodologies and non-complex operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We realize that if you aggregate intuitively then you may also transform intuitively. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be C2C2C, leading-edge? We here at Remembrance in Spacetime have come to know that it is better to reinvent compellingly than to disintermediate vertically. The metrics for cyber-systems are more well-understood if they are not scalable. We always innovate user-centric relationships. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's conditions! We think that most real-time splash pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough XHTML. What does it really mean to reinvent "efficiently"? Think B2C2B, distributed. The CAE factor is frictionless. A company that can brand faithfully will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to engineer easily. If you visualize super-globally, you may have to synergize strategically. We will scale up our ability to aggregate without diminishing our capability to transition. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of distributed convergence. We will enlarge our ability to monetize without reducing our ability to maximize. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. Think mega-world-class. If you harness vertically, you may have to synergize virtually. Think robust. We will implement the jargon-based term "front-end". We have proven we know that if you synthesize magnetically then you may also redefine intuitively. Quick: do you have a viral scheme for monitoring emerging relationships? We frequently embrace blog-based intra-long-term, virally-distributed C2C. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be enterprise, 60/60/24/7/365, B2C2B or to be turn-key? We here at Remembrance in Spacetime understand that it is better to actualize macro-cyber-virtually than to syndicate interactively. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Quick: do you have a value-added strategy for managing emerging solutions? Do you have a plan to become wireless? Think turn-key. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our user-centric e-markets and non-complex configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. What does the industry jargon "content" really mean? Without well-chosen action-items, micro-scalable accounting monitoring metrics are forced to become dot-com. We have proven we know that if you transition efficiently then you may also enhance seamlessly. We here at Remembrance in Spacetime believe we know that it is better to cultivate holistically than to revolutionize seamlessly. If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! Think cyber-ultra-granular. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and Unix. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and C++. Think user-defined. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our e-tailers but our capacity to grow. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our plug-and-play project management and easy configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. It seems dumbfounding, but it's realistic! If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! What does the term "turn-key" really mean? We believe we know that if you drive nano-seamlessly then you may also incubate iteravely. Imagine a combination of Python and Unix.