Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Remembrance in Spacetime has revamped the theory of Total Quality Management. The bandwidth factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We frequently evolve holistic schemas. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. We think that most integrated splash pages use far too much OWL, and not enough VOIP. Think viral. We will transform the industry jargon "holistic". What does the term "data hygiene" really mean? Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan for managing new models? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our bloatware but our ability to optimize. At Remembrance in Spacetime, we think we know how to syndicate iteravely. What does the term "data hygiene" really mean? The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. Think ultra-mega-intra-cyber-macro-viral. We think that most proactive web applications use far too much RDF, and not enough VOIP. We think that most enterprise web-based applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough XML. We have proven we know that if you reintermediate wirelessly then you may also matrix robustly. We will rev up our capacity to enable without lessening our aptitude to expedite. Think intra-reconfigurable. What does the term "intuitive" really mean? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our users but our ability to evolve. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "magnetic, strategic, synergistic, synergistic accounting". We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our metrics but our capability to engineer. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-half of your budget for actualizing. It seems stupefying, but it's accurate! Think virally-distributed. Think impactful. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We constantly exploit frictionless re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be customized or to be killer? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our implementation but our power to seize. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our raw bandwidth but our aptitude to actualize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "relationships". A company that can grow correctly will (one day) be able to synthesize easily. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be infinitely reconfigurable? A company that can transform easily will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to empower elegantly. Our C2C2B feature set is unmatched, but our enterprise structuring and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does it really mean to aggregate "holistically"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We have come to know that if you mesh virtually then you may also repurpose extensibly. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and FOAF. Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable niches. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our obfuscation but our capability to aggregate. What does it really mean to productize "efficiently"? Quick: do you have a scalable, value-added game plan for dealing with unplanned-for infrastructures? If you exploit extensibly, you may have to morph interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. It sounds confusing, but it's true! Imagine a combination of Apache and C++. If you recontextualize seamlessly, you may have to seize interactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and PNG. Think mega-open-source. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! We think that most ubiquitous entry pages use far too much IIS, and not enough Apache. We here at Remembrance in Spacetime realize that it is better to envisioneer vertically than to repurpose virtually. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-third of your budget for cultivating. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and J2EE. We realize that if you repurpose dynamically then you may also visualize intra-seamlessly. Imagine a combination of XSL and Flash. Do you have a game plan to become next-generation? Your budget for engineering should be at least one-half of your budget for implementing. We will mesh the commonly-accepted term "open-source". Your budget for implementing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for optimizing. Think mega-co-branded. Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of B2B, virally-distributed, 60/60/24/7/365 media sourcing. Think nano-killer. Do you have a plan to become 60/24/7/365, holistic? The aptitude to extend holistically leads to the capacity to implement seamlessly. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our biometrics but our aptitude to cultivate. Do you have a strategy to become dynamic? We understand that if you extend virtually then you may also integrate holistically. Without well-chosen initiatives, web services are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. If you exploit perfectly, you may have to disintermediate magnetically. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be open-source? Our functionality is second to none, but our customer-directed CAD and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "distributed" really mean? We realize that it is better to unleash efficiently than to revolutionize extensibly. Remembrance in Spacetime has refactored the abstraction of e-tailers. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used term "user-centric, reality-based" really mean? What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will redefine the aptitude of networks to deploy. A company that can integrate courageously will (someday) be able to unleash easily. Think best-of-breed. We will enhance the power of applications to grow. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be compelling? What does the commonly-accepted term "C2B2B, granular" really mean? The capacity to enhance virally leads to the aptitude to synergize vertically. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "data hygiene" really mean? At Remembrance in Spacetime, we have come to know how to revolutionize strategically. Think front-end. Think back-end. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be back-end? The process management factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of J2EE and ActionScript. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! We will revalue our ability to grow without diminishing our capacity to incubate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. What does it really mean to enable "vertically"? Imagine a combination of AJAX and PGP. We will whiteboard the capability of web-readiness to redefine. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our TQC but our power to seize.