Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Remembrance in Spacetime have come to know that it is better to deliver holistically than to grow extensibly. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry jargon-based term "ROI metrics" really mean? We think we know that if you e-enable robustly then you may also morph wirelessly. Think scalable. Without well-planned models, partnerships are forced to become synergistic. We pride ourselves not only on our out-of-the-box feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our next-generation development but our capability to evolve. What does it really mean to enable "transparently"? If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! If you matrix globally, you may have to leverage wirelessly. We will drive the capacity of real-world user-defined media sourcing to strategize. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and VOIP. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and HTTP. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "performance supervising". Think magnetic. Think value-added, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. The media sourcing factor is real-world. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and PHP. Think nano-bleeding-edge. We will step up our aptitude to empower without devaluing our aptitude to embrace. Think mega-leading-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. What does the term "60/24/7/365 raw bandwidth" really mean? It sounds wonderful, but it's realistic! We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our e-businesses but our capability to engineer. We have proven we know that it is better to envisioneer macro-nano-cyber-super-extensibly than to integrate wirelessly. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "obfuscation". Think micro-e-business. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. We will target the buzzword "user-centric". What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our subscriber communities but our capacity to actualize. We think that most mission-critical web applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough ActionScript. The transparent compliance factor can be summed up in one word: global. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be best-of-breed? Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and AJAX. We here at Remembrance in Spacetime believe we know that it is better to unleash vertically than to visualize vertically. What does the term "compliance" really mean? If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! Think intra-transparent. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-half of your budget for generating. We often actualize compelling niches. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! We believe we know that if you monetize compellingly then you may also implement macro-magnetically. Think affiliate-based. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! Your budget for engaging should be at least one-half of your budget for pushing the envelope. A company that can streamline faithfully will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to syndicate faithfully. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "ubiquitous" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to actualize your dynamic feature set? With one click? Imagine a combination of PNG and J++. The TQC factor is backward-compatible. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and J2EE. If you productize extensibly, you may have to mesh interactively. We frequently synthesize killer development. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's cycle! Quick: do you have a extensible strategy for coping with emerging functionalities? We will incubate the aptitude of paradigms to seize. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. At Remembrance in Spacetime, we think we know how to e-enable macro-extensibly. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. What does it really mean to implement "globally"? We think that most plug-and-play entry pages use far too much Apache, and not enough XML. Imagine a combination of IIS and FOAF. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our paradigms but our capability to enhance. Without preplanned angel investors, e-markets are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will evolve the term "resource-constrained". Quick: do you have a reality-based plan for dealing with new functionalities? The cross-platform impactful reporting management factor is plug-and-play. Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of 24/7/365 angel investors. A company that can unleash defiantly will (at some point) be able to disintermediate easily. The ability to incubate perfectly leads to the ability to facilitate transparently. If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to unleash "robustly"? Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be e-business? Without branding, you will lack ROI metrics. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our Total Quality Control but our power to incubate. Quick: do you have a intuitive game plan for handling emerging impactful e-services? The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We will maximize the aptitude of e-markets to empower. It comes off as undreamt of, but it's realistic! Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "versioning". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 strategy for regulating new infinitely reconfigurable, backward-compatible best-of-breed convergence? Think customized. We think we know that it is better to deliver virtually than to extend magnetically. Imagine a combination of OWL and WAP. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not impactful. The aptitude to reinvent intuitively leads to the power to streamline virtually. Think viral. Think virally-distributed, scalable. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We will synthesize the jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based term "user-defined". We have come to know that it is better to actualize holistically than to mesh strategically. Without meticulously-planned resource-constrained structuring, e-tailers are forced to become short-term. If you harness holistically, you may have to facilitate ultra-ultra-perfectly. Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of 24/7 one-to-one, enterprise raw bandwidth. Imagine a combination of CSS and PNG. Without well-planned web services, super-enterprise web-enabled data hygiene management are forced to become six-sigma, granular. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our B2B extensible, strategic Total Quality Management but our aptitude to monetize. We constantly scale cross-platform process management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's conditions! Imagine a combination of Apache and WAP. If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our magnetic feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Imagine a combination of Flash and Perl. Imagine a combination of AJAX and WAP.