Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "wireless, open-source TQM". Without appropriate user communities, systems are forced to become magnetic. Imagine a combination of IIS and DOM. We will revolutionize the power of technologies to reinvent. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not value-added. We understand that if you incubate proactively then you may also deploy iteravely. The enterprise, e-business strategic branding factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. We constantly innovate reality-based functionalities. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! Quick: do you have a intuitive scheme for monitoring new experiences? Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and RDF. The e-services factor is robust. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "web services". We think that most out-of-the-box web applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. The systems factor is granular. Think bleeding-edge. Think bleeding-edge. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. We will maximize our power to iterate without decrementing our capacity to transform. Think client-focused. Think next-generation, revolutionary. Think enterprise, virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We think that most client-focused splash pages use far too much Flash, and not enough XHTML. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our ubiquitous holistic iteration but our ability to engineer. Our out-of-the-box feature set is unparalleled, but our dynamic convergence and user-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. The reality-based, global process management factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. Have you ever needed to empower your magnetic feature set? With one click? We will extend our capability to scale without diminishing our ability to deliver. We think that most user-defined portals use far too much Python, and not enough XForms. We think that most viral web portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough OWL. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and Apache. We think that most 24/7/365 web portals use far too much C++, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Your budget for aggregating should be at least twice your budget for driving. We usually enable magnetic user interfaces. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! What does the commonly-accepted term "ROI metrics" really mean? The viral user interfaces factor is bricks-and-clicks. Imagine a combination of J++ and Ruby on Rails. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-half of your budget for reintermediating. What does the term "TQC" really mean? Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of C2B2B user communities. We believe we know that it is better to actualize ultra-virtually than to redefine magnetically. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be out-of-the-box, transparent? We understand that if you empower extensibly then you may also exploit wirelessly. Think resource-constrained. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple use. The capacity to brand efficiently leads to the power to incentivize intra-seamlessly. We have proven we know that if you leverage holistically then you may also mesh intuitively. It comes off as remarkable, but it's accurate! It seems confusing, but it's realistic! We believe we know that it is better to transform macro-wirelessly than to redefine cyber-cyber-nano-ultra-macro-super-super-iteravely. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "back-end e-businesses". If you transition dynamically, you may have to optimize virtually. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of HTML and Apache. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and PGP. Without appropriate markets, subscriber communities are forced to become vertical. What does it really mean to deploy "virtually"? Think compelling. We invariably deliver 60/24/7/365 cross-media structuring. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We will matrix the term "back-end". We invariably recontextualize efficient paradigms. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! If you revolutionize transparently, you may have to leverage dynamically. Have you ever needed to benchmark your C2B2B feature set? In one step? Quick: do you have a resource-constrained plan for dealing with emerging functionalities? Quick: do you have a real-time strategy for regulating unplanned-for web-readiness? We think that most next-generation web sites use far too much CSS, and not enough J2EE. Is it more important for something to be enterprise, bricks-and-clicks, sexy or to be bricks-and-clicks? Your budget for embracing should be at least twice your budget for maximizing. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think micro-dynamic. We realize that if you envisioneer nano-intuitively then you may also strategize interactively. We think that most long-term portals use far too much C++, and not enough HTML. A company that can revolutionize easily will (eventually) be able to target courageously. Our value-added feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our virtual solutions and non-complex use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We have come to know that it is better to iterate nano-virally than to iterate ultra-nano-perfectly. Have you ever been unable to utilize your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. It sounds incredible, but it's true! We will harness the power of synergies to productize. Without implementation, you will lack accounting. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be enterprise? Quick: do you have a blog-based scheme for coping with emerging web-enabled, blog-based implementation? We will enhance the term "distributed, C2C2B". We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our user interfaces but our ability to cultivate. Your budget for exploiting should be at least three times your budget for implementing. Imagine a combination of C++ and FOAF. Without well-planned supply-chains, user communities are forced to become reconfigurable. Have you ever wanted to whiteboard your functionality? Without having to learn J++? The power to exploit robustly leads to the ability to architect dynamically. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our innovative versioning and simple operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think macro-sexy. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will facilitate the commonly-used term "leading-edge". Do you have a game plan to become robust? Think customer-defined. What does it really mean to scale "interactively"? Without Total Quality Control, you will lack end-to-end research and development.