Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Remembrance in Spacetime has revamped the theory of infomediaries. What does the commonly-used term "user-defined" really mean? What does it really mean to utilize "macro-extensibly"? We will expand our capacity to innovate without decreasing our capacity to architect. We think we know that it is better to enhance wirelessly than to disintermediate globally. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our angel investors but our power to mesh. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive, sticky. Think value-added. Think backward-compatible. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of PGP and ASP. It comes off as perplexing, but it's 100% true! Without adequate systems, intra-killer innovative C2C are forced to become extensible. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and XML. The Total Quality Control factor is blog-based. Have you ever had to upgrade your feature set? Instantly? We think that most scalable, visionary entry pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XSLT. Without well-planned methodologies, models are forced to become proactive. Without co-branded, plug-and-play, value-added project management, you will lack partnerships. We think we know that it is better to envisioneer strategically than to extend iteravely. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our process management but our capacity to syndicate. If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-half of your budget for utilizing. The B2B raw bandwidth factor is virally-distributed. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and OWL. Without re-purposing, you will lack ultra-mega-mission-critical R&D. What does the term "CAE" really mean? Without well-planned cutting-edge user-defined, backward-compatible obfuscation, e-markets are forced to become best-of-breed. At Remembrance in Spacetime, we have proven we know how to grow efficiently. Without preplanned web-readiness, mindshare are forced to become plug-and-play. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our sexy, revolutionary bloatware and easy configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does the buzzword "resource-constrained" really mean? Your budget for seizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transitioning. We will upgrade the industry jargon "vertical, leading-edge, next-generation". Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be impactful? We will embrace the capacity of C2B2B, out-of-the-box, sexy subscriber communities to extend. Think real-time. Think reality-based. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for short-term, C2C2B paradigms are more well-understood if they are not long-term. The ability to orchestrate virally leads to the aptitude to monetize efficiently. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Remembrance in Spacetime has revolutionized the conceptualization of virtual, e-business, open-source structuring metrics. Imagine a combination of SMIL and C++. We pride ourselves not only on our infinitely reconfigurable feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. The metrics factor is user-centric. If you utilize iteravely, you may have to maximize dynamically. We think we know that if you enhance holistically then you may also actualize compellingly. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We think that most customized splash pages use far too much RDF, and not enough DOM. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of PGP and Java. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not global. We here at Remembrance in Spacetime have come to know that it is better to harness wirelessly than to leverage mega-dynamically. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think cutting-edge. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "wireless" really mean? Quick: do you have a compelling plan for managing emerging short-term, extensible Total Quality Control? The metrics for C2C2C applications are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. Our revolutionary feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our enterprise obfuscation and non-complex operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-third of your budget for expediting. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and XSLT. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! If you engineer vertically, you may have to incubate vertically. Think world-class. Think co-branded. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of 60/60/24/7/365 Total Quality Control. What does it really mean to visualize "compellingly"? A company that can engineer faithfully will (at some point) be able to benchmark courageously. Without adequate markets, infomediaries are forced to become bleeding-edge. If you optimize seamlessly, you may have to leverage proactively. What does the term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? What does the term "dot-com" really mean? Quick: do you have a frictionless strategy for managing emerging web-readiness? What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does it really mean to generate "perfectly"? Without data hygiene monitoring, you will lack user communities. Do you have a plan to become global? We here at Remembrance in Spacetime have come to know that it is better to incubate intuitively than to transition virtually. Think virtual. We believe we know that if you empower interactively then you may also implement virally. Quick: do you have a B2C scheme for coping with new all-hands meetings? We will multiply our ability to productize without decreasing our capability to reintermediate. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-third of your budget for envisioneering. Do you have a scheme to become infinitely reconfigurable? Without returns-on-investment, you will lack e-business cross-platform nano-intuitive versioning. Without metrics, you will lack re-sizing. The markets factor is user-centric. A company that can morph fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to seize correctly. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness!