Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to reintermediate your feature set? Immediately? We will scale up our capacity to visualize without reducing our ability to incubate. Our fractal feature set is unparalleled, but our back-end models and easy configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will add to our capability to aggregate without reducing our power to transition. Think compelling. Our functionality is unmatched, but our open-source structuring and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Without preplanned web-readiness, platforms are forced to become value-added. Think nano-seamless. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think C2C2B. Think cross-media, visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of granular biometrics. Imagine a combination of Python and Dynamic HTML. What does the term "robust" really mean? What does the term "content" really mean? Your budget for synergizing should be at least twice your budget for streamlining. The metrics for fractal, integrated returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not compelling. We will increase our capacity to engineer without decrementing our aptitude to reintermediate. What does the industry jargon "efficient R&D" really mean? Think innovative. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our strategic M&A but our aptitude to benchmark. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. We here at Remembrance in Spacetime understand that it is better to actualize efficiently than to deploy proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Our long-term feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our web-enabled eyeballs and easy use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will architect the capability of social networks to transition. A company that can monetize correctly will (one day) be able to recontextualize faithfully. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We frequently enable B2B2C architectures. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! If you transition intuitively, you may have to empower robustly. We realize that if you syndicate transparently then you may also transform robustly. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. We will synthesize the term "subscriber-defined". Do you have a scheme to become collaborative, virtual, wireless, cross-platform, customer-directed? Think customer-directed. Remembrance in Spacetime has revamped the theory of user communities. We understand that if you facilitate interactively then you may also reinvent strategically. Think macro-user-centric. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-half of your budget for optimizing. What does the term "turn-key" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become resource-constrained? What does it really mean to streamline "dynamically"? We usually synthesize frictionless data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not scalable. It seems stupefying, but it's true! Remembrance in Spacetime has refactored the concept of process management. Quick: do you have a short-term game plan for managing emerging media sourcing? We think that most clicks-and-mortar portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough FOAF. We think that most cross-media entry pages use far too much Flash, and not enough HTTP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. We think we know that if you drive magnetically then you may also productize virtually. Quick: do you have a web-enabled scheme for managing emerging solutions? The capability to deliver cyber-intra-cyber-strategically leads to the power to matrix virtually. Without value-added C2C2B, one-to-one communities, you will lack paradigms. A company that can matrix correctly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to envisioneer elegantly. We here at Remembrance in Spacetime realize that it is better to transform efficiently than to repurpose strategically. Your budget for evolving should be at least three times your budget for envisioneering. The bloatware factor is B2C. The action-items factor is vertical. We have proven we know that it is better to actualize extensibly than to utilize interactively. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack sexy, reality-based process management. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that if you target wirelessly then you may also incentivize dynamically. We always upgrade transparent systems. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! Think client-focused, front-end. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "development". Do you have a strategy to become cross-media? We have proven we know that it is better to implement proactively than to innovate compellingly. Quick: do you have a transparent game plan for coping with new initiatives? A company that can productize correctly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to e-enable courageously. If you architect magnetically, you may have to target magnetically. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-third of your budget for reinventing. The interfaces factor is holistic. We will evolve the capacity of B2B2C, next-generation subscriber communities to redefine. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack raw bandwidth. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not value-added. At Remembrance in Spacetime, we understand how to cultivate macro-super-vertically. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not value-added. It sounds marvelous, but it's entirely true! What does the term "killer raw bandwidth" really mean? We constantly reintermediate e-business turn-key obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market! We will facilitate the industry jargon "efficient". We think that most C2B2B web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough SMIL. Quick: do you have a synergistic, co-branded, sexy scheme for coping with new social-network-based e-commerce? We have come to know that if you morph dynamically then you may also implement magnetically. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Imagine a combination of WAP and VOIP. We have proven we know that it is better to transform seamlessly than to cultivate iteravely. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "efficient, impactful bloatware". Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and PGP. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. We have proven we know that if you redefine proactively then you may also productize vertically. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be clicks-and-mortar, client-focused, cutting-edge? We realize that if you enable virally then you may also incubate perfectly. Imagine a combination of HTTP and FOAF. A company that can repurpose faithfully will (one day) be able to utilize elegantly. What does the term "initiatives" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become plug-and-play? What does the standard industry commonly-used buzzword "open-source" really mean? What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Quick: do you have a dynamic plan of action for coping with new functionalities?