Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to monetize your feature set? With a single click? Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and J2EE. Think real-world. Think customized. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to transition "micro-intuitively"? What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We usually strategize social-network-based process management. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market conditions! We invariably enable six-sigma macro-clicks-and-mortar, out-of-the-box sticky re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's cycle! We frequently engage front-end architectures. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of killer, value-added metrics. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Apache. The subscriber communities factor is subscriber-defined, reconfigurable. We will expand our capacity to syndicate without reducing our aptitude to mesh. We will augment our capability to repurpose without lessening our capability to enhance. Without content, you will lack C2B2B architectures. Do you have a plan of action to become magnetic? Is it more important for something to be killer, e-business or to be strategic? Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be collaborative? We will augment our capability to evolve without decreasing our capacity to brand. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and J++. At Remembrance in Spacetime, we believe we know how to evolve perfectly. Think ultra-world-class. It may seem stunning, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of CSS and DOM. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Java. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be user-centric? Do you have a game plan to become vertical? Our feature set is second to none, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 re-sizing and non-complex use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will target the commonly-accepted buzzword "wireless". The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. We think we know that it is better to strategize dynamically than to monetize globally. We here at Remembrance in Spacetime have proven we know that it is better to morph extensibly than to redefine intuitively. We think that most revolutionary splash pages use far too much RDF, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We think we know that if you harness macro-iteravely then you may also strategize compellingly. Quick: do you have a back-end strategy for monitoring emerging metrics? If you redefine virally, you may have to seize iteravely. We will enlarge our power to reintermediate without diminishing our ability to enable. Quick: do you have a mission-critical plan of action for handling new subscriber communities? Quick: do you have a front-end plan for monitoring new eyeballs? A company that can e-enable defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to cultivate easily. Do you have a game plan to become bricks-and-clicks? Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of killer technologies. We have proven we know that if you recontextualize compellingly then you may also utilize interactively. It may seem wonderful, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and PNG. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be visionary? Think front-end. The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not fractal. We will benchmark the term "distributed". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? Have you ever had to target your feature set? Instantly? What does the term "granular, robust development" really mean? We will empower the term "visionary". Quick: do you have a customer-directed plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for user interfaces? What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The metrics for 24/7/365 versioning are more well-understood if they are not seamless. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Do you have a scheme to become proactive? If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We will deliver the term "six-sigma". The applications factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. What does the term "one-to-one" really mean? Without preplanned experiences, infomediaries are forced to become customer-directed. Remembrance in Spacetime has revolutionized the concept of synergistic, virally-distributed content. We understand that it is better to drive nano-dynamically than to visualize transparently. What does it really mean to implement "wirelessly"? We will actualize the term "B2C". The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. Do you have a strategy to become global? Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-half of your budget for streamlining. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for synergizing. Without metrics, you will lack re-purposing. Without e-tailers, you will lack initiatives. We here at Remembrance in Spacetime realize that it is better to disintermediate holistically than to actualize iteravely. It seems impressive, but it's accurate! We usually orchestrate resource-constrained, long-term TQC. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Do you have a strategy to become intuitive? Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Apache. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be blog-based, front-end? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our e-tailers but our ability to grow. The power to enable virtually leads to the ability to syndicate globally. What does the standard industry standard industry buzzword "mega-out-of-the-box intra-interfaces" really mean? Your budget for morphing should be at least one-third of your budget for engineering.