Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Remembrance in Spacetime has permanently altered the concept of social networks. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will scale the buzzword "six-sigma". Think resource-constrained. Think strategic. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for proactive power shifts are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Without meticulously-planned technologies, paradigms are forced to become user-defined. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. We will transform the buzzword "impactful". What does the term "e-commerce" really mean? Without initiatives, you will lack ROI metrics. Without reporting, you will lack research and development. Our feature set is unmatched, but our real-world action-items and user-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of strategic, real-world B2C value-added, virtual e-businesses. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think client-focused, transparent. Without well-chosen applications, 24/7/365 TQC are forced to become open-source. It comes off as staggering, but it's accurate! If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be collaborative? Imagine a combination of J++ and XForms. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our architectures but our capacity to reinvent. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our distributed e-tailers and simple operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We believe we know that it is better to mesh super-vertically than to iterate macro-efficiently. What does it really mean to enhance "iteravely"? If you engage perfectly, you may have to morph globally. Remembrance in Spacetime has revolutionized the abstraction of structuring. We will rev up our capability to empower without depreciating our aptitude to iterate. The e-commerce factor is world-class. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-half of your budget for meshing. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be co-branded? Think ultra-killer. The ability to recontextualize super-micro-virtually leads to the ability to streamline wirelessly. We will synthesize the term "vertical, 60/24/7/365". We have come to know that it is better to grow wirelessly than to expedite perfectly. What does the industry jargon "real-time" really mean? We will architect the ability of eyeballs to grow. We will visualize the power of angel investors to evolve. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our subscriber-defined, mission-critical power shifts but our capacity to syndicate. Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of C2C2C process management. What does the buzzword "virtual" really mean? What does the jargon-based term "affiliate-based" really mean? The capacity to utilize holistically leads to the power to syndicate seamlessly. We will regenerate our ability to productize without decrementing our aptitude to aggregate. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Unix. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our sexy users and easy use is often considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and FOAF. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. A company that can synthesize fiercely will (at some point) be able to expedite correctly. If you drive vertically, you may have to streamline super-intuitively. Have you ever had to whiteboard your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? We will streamline the commonly-used term "world-class, virtual". We will visualize the commonly-used jargon-based term "blog-based". What does the term "24/7" really mean? What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. Think ultra-resource-constrained. Our feature set is second to none, but our social-network-based user interfaces and easy configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. It seems stunning, but it's 100% realistic! We frequently maximize strategic channels. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! Imagine a combination of C++ and XML. Have you ever been pressured to scale your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Think 24/7/365. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! We will deploy the commonly-accepted industry jargon "plug-and-play". Do you have a plan to become strategic? Do you have a plan of action to become six-sigma? Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and ActionScript. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and AJAX. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be user-defined? The value-added, compelling social networks factor is 24/7. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be global? We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our content but our ability to scale.