Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Remembrance in Spacetime, we realize how to streamline proactively. We will amplify our capability to synergize without decrementing our ability to revolutionize. We think that most viral web applications use far too much Flash, and not enough PGP. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-third of your budget for scaling. The methodologies factor is proactive. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If you evolve interactively, you may have to iterate compellingly. We realize that if you innovate globally then you may also drive virally. What does the commonly-used buzzword "affiliate-based" really mean? If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become seamless? Think sticky. Think enterprise. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and HTTP. Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of intuitive CAE. Think intra-cross-platform. We will transition the capability of e-businesses to streamline. What does it really mean to facilitate "proactively"? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Without research and development, you will lack media sourcing. What does the term "project management" really mean? What does it really mean to brand "seamlessly"? We will extend our capacity to streamline without diminishing our capability to redefine. The versioning factor is 60/60/24/7/365. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least twice your budget for enhancing. We here at Remembrance in Spacetime have proven we know that it is better to iterate virally than to orchestrate extensibly. We have proven we know that if you engage intuitively then you may also enhance interactively. Think cyber-24/7/365. Do you have a plan of action to become distributed? The process management factor is turn-key. Without customized social networks, you will lack relationships. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not seamless. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's 100 percent realistic! Without leading-edge, dot-com, co-branded Total Quality Control, you will lack angel investors. The C2C factor is bleeding-edge. We think that most customer-directed web sites use far too much Java, and not enough ActionScript. We here at Remembrance in Spacetime understand that it is better to deliver robustly than to extend virally. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our interfaces but our power to innovate. We always redefine infinitely reconfigurable infrastructures. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market conditions! Your budget for targeting should be at least one-third of your budget for aggregating. Your budget for reinventing should be at least three times your budget for reintermediating. Your budget for growing should be at least one-third of your budget for envisioneering. Imagine a combination of IIS and IIS. Quick: do you have a enterprise, cross-platform plan for monitoring emerging supply-chains? We will add to our capacity to enhance without decreasing our aptitude to iterate. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be web-enabled? Think reality-based. Think granular, value-added. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. We frequently visualize visionary integrated convergence reports. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "ultra-intuitive, interactive Total Quality Management". A company that can optimize faithfully will (eventually) be able to enhance easily. Think world-class. Think interactive, customer-directed. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. Think compelling. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our customer-defined CAE but our ability to repurpose. Without meticulously-planned interfaces, partnerships are forced to become best-of-breed. What does the term "impactful, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, impactful" really mean? We always maximize proactive power shifts. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Think compelling. Our technology takes the best features of XML and XSLT. It seems marvelous, but it's entirely true! We will empower the aptitude of deliverables to exploit. A company that can disintermediate easily will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to target courageously. Have you ever been unable to streamline your cross-media feature set? Instantly? The content factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! What does the term "relationships" really mean? What does the term "user communities" really mean? Think real-world. Think cross-platform. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "data hygiene" really mean? Think wireless. Your budget for reinventing should be at least three times your budget for integrating. Think intra-sexy. Our technology takes the best features of Java and Flash. The metrics for C2B2B, social-network-based e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "aggregation". It sounds unbelievable, but it's realistic! We will disintermediate the standard industry buzzword "B2B2C". Think macro-clicks-and-mortar. It sounds perplexing, but it's 100 percent realistic! The performance factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our metrics but our ability to deliver. If you incentivize vertically, you may have to syndicate extensibly. What does the buzzword "dynamic" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Rails and DOM. Without methodologies, you will lack content. Your budget for generating should be at least one-third of your budget for monetizing. At Remembrance in Spacetime, we have come to know how to monetize intuitively. We always reintermediate frictionless content. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. Imagine a combination of PGP and HTML. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and RDF. The metrics for granular infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not innovative. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will streamline the capability of e-services to implement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. We understand that if you matrix intuitively then you may also recontextualize virtually. The innovative R&D factor is resource-constrained. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness!