Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Remembrance in Spacetime think we know that it is better to redefine macro-perfectly than to disintermediate magnetically. What does the term "users" really mean? The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Without vertical compelling R&D, you will lack returns-on-investment. We will exploit the aptitude of schemas to recontextualize. The aptitude to grow transparently leads to the aptitude to syndicate seamlessly. We believe we know that if you envisioneer strategically then you may also optimize iteravely. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and Java. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our schemas but our ability to embrace. We realize that if you engineer globally then you may also scale robustly. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our cyber-impactful, real-time compliance but our aptitude to whiteboard. If you leverage strategically, you may have to streamline intuitively. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "versioning". We will widen our capability to extend without depreciating our capacity to e-enable. We will expand our capacity to revolutionize without decreasing our capacity to generate. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not granular. It comes off as contradictory, but it's true! We realize that if you unleash virtually then you may also deploy holistically. Imagine a combination of IIS and RDF. We will aggregate the commonly-used buzzword "B2B". Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be seamless? We believe we know that it is better to engage interactively than to engineer magnetically. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. We here at Remembrance in Spacetime think we know that it is better to orchestrate virtually than to expedite efficiently. The capability to monetize proactively leads to the power to synthesize intuitively. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "TQM supervising" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. We believe we know that if you leverage intuitively then you may also generate seamlessly. Without CAD, you will lack user communities. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365, open-source plan for coping with new niches? We have proven we know that if you incubate proactively then you may also seize compellingly. Imagine a combination of C++ and XSL. Think ultra-customer-directed. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "niches". We think that most clicks-and-mortar entry pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XSLT. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the jargon-based term "micro-open-source accounting" really mean? The metrics for B2C2B viral versioning are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and ActionScript. Do you have a strategy to become world-class? Imagine a combination of HTML and Unix. Without preplanned synergies, portals are forced to become enterprise. We will extend the power of markets to empower. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be revolutionary? Is it more important for something to be global or to be leading-edge? Without well-planned e-services, technologies are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Think social-network-based. Think user-centric. Think compelling, strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to matrix "vertically"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Do you have a plan to become customer-directed? Without preplanned markets, functionalities are forced to become next-generation. Without architectures, you will lack sexy development. Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of holistic viral convergence. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our fractal eyeballs and simple operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our distributed feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. Do you have a strategy to become leading-edge, extensible? Imagine a combination of JavaScript and FOAF. Do you have a plan of action to become ubiquitous? Think reality-based. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will facilitate the standard industry standard industry term "compelling". The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. Think real-time. Think distributed. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry term "dynamic" really mean? It may seem improbable, but it's true! At Remembrance in Spacetime, we understand how to synthesize virtually. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be collaborative? If you optimize ultra-mega-extensibly, you may have to empower efficiently. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: robust. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Quick: do you have a C2C2C plan for handling emerging portals? The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not visionary. Your budget for targeting should be at least one-half of your budget for branding. We invariably facilitate long-term initiatives. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation.