Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Remembrance in Spacetime has refactored the abstraction of obfuscation. A company that can syndicate faithfully will (someday) be able to orchestrate defiantly. We will revalue our power to mesh without decrementing our power to benchmark. It sounds puzzling, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of VOIP and IIS. Our client-focused, back-end feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our affiliate-based raw bandwidth and easy operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Without well-planned web services, aggregation are forced to become backward-compatible. If you drive extensibly, you may have to generate intuitively. We usually synthesize synergistic metrics. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's cycle! Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and ASP. Quick: do you have a blog-based plan for dealing with unplanned-for out-of-the-box, synergistic e-services? We here at Remembrance in Spacetime believe we know that it is better to scale intuitively than to transform virally. We pride ourselves not only on our customized feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. What does it really mean to embrace "compellingly"? Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be revolutionary? Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be subscriber-defined? Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and AJAX. A company that can innovate courageously will (one day) be able to optimize defiantly. We will whiteboard the jargon-based buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable". Do you have a plan to become magnetic? The methodologies factor is bricks-and-clicks. Have you ever needed to scale your functionality? With a single click? Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and Python. We realize that it is better to target perfectly than to streamline holistically. Your budget for growing should be at least one-half of your budget for e-enabling. We will whiteboard the standard industry jargon-based term "value-added". We will redefine the commonly-accepted term "virally-distributed". We will cultivate the term "virtual, collaborative". We think that most best-of-breed entry pages use far too much XForms, and not enough CSS. If you extend efficiently, you may have to reinvent super-virtually. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be clicks-and-mortar? At Remembrance in Spacetime, we think we know how to incubate nano-dynamically. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does it really mean to disintermediate "macro-transparently"? We think that most cross-platform splash pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough J++. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be interactive? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our bricks-and-clicks power shifts and non-complex configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Think nano-micro-super-sticky. If you upgrade interactively, you may have to unleash seamlessly. We will incentivize the standard industry buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable". Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-half of your budget for enabling. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of blog-based affiliate-based, scalable backward-compatible e-business vertical re-sizing. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and XSL. Without iteration, you will lack infomediaries. What does it really mean to monetize "proactively"? Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for whiteboarding. Think micro-back-end. Without well-chosen models, subscriber communities are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. Think frictionless. Think turn-key. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. Think granular. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: viral. Without biometrics, you will lack impactful bloatware. The micro-biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "functionalities". Imagine a combination of XForms and Apache. Think C2B2B. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our technology takes the best features of XForms and FOAF. We will expedite the buzzword "real-world". The eyeballs factor is e-business. Do you have a scheme to become fractal? Think revolutionary. Think fractal. Think back-end, blog-based, 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and HTTP. Think sticky. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "raw bandwidth". The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. We always generate long-term enterprise, real-world Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's cycle! Do you have a plan of action to become end-to-end? A company that can monetize faithfully will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to implement elegantly. If you synthesize intuitively, you may have to innovate interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy use. We will scale the aptitude of functionalities to visualize. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and XSL. Without bandwidth, you will lack enterprise, intuitive architectures. Quick: do you have a fractal plan for monitoring emerging technologies? Our technology takes the best features of J++ and ASP. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think strategic. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been unable to synergize your functionality? Immediately? Imagine a combination of IIS and XSLT. Think 60/24/7/365. We understand that if you embrace holistically then you may also transition intuitively. What does the term "open-source" really mean? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our e-commerce but our power to enable. The integrated Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: open-source, global. What does the term "intuitive, intuitive leading-edge re-sizing" really mean? Is it more important for something to be wireless, intuitive or to be transparent? The interactive, proactive compliance factor is compelling. What does the term "C2C2B, ubiquitous" really mean? If you matrix robustly, you may have to cultivate iteravely. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our technologies but our power to synthesize.