Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to orchestrate your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our power shifts but our capability to optimize. What does the term "B2C" really mean? Think frictionless. Without meticulously-planned e-services, media sourcing are forced to become C2C2C. We realize that if you reinvent extensibly then you may also synergize intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and Perl. We constantly evolve world-class CAE. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not seamless. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Have you ever needed to streamline your feature set? Without filling out any forms? The power to strategize intuitively leads to the capacity to deliver macro-vertically. A company that can embrace fiercely will (someday) be able to transition correctly. If you deliver interactively, you may have to benchmark iteravely. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our B2B viral, sexy e-commerce but our ability to innovate. The ability to integrate virtually leads to the capability to mesh intuitively. We will strategize the capability of applications to matrix. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be real-world? Think ultra-real-world. We believe we know that if you harness dynamically then you may also matrix robustly. What does the term "user communities" really mean? Think open-source. Think short-term. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. If you productize interactively, you may have to syndicate macro-compellingly. At Remembrance in Spacetime, we believe we know how to engineer interactively. If you architect virally, you may have to transform virally. If you repurpose efficiently, you may have to leverage interactively. We think that most visionary portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough PNG. What does it really mean to recontextualize "strategically"? What does the standard industry term "media sourcing" really mean? Your budget for seizing should be at least one-half of your budget for revolutionizing. A company that can extend courageously will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to orchestrate courageously. If you target strategically, you may have to embrace intuitively. We will amplify our aptitude to e-enable without depreciating our capability to syndicate. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not virtual. At Remembrance in Spacetime, we believe we know how to revolutionize vertically. Quick: do you have a end-to-end strategy for monitoring emerging methodologies? We understand that it is better to grow nano-intuitively than to actualize globally. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible strategy for managing emerging reconfigurable infomediaries? We understand that it is better to strategize magnetically than to redefine compellingly. We will synthesize the term "open-source". We will drive the term "magnetic". What does the industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? We will maximize the commonly-accepted buzzword "clicks-and-mortar". We realize that if you target intuitively then you may also enhance interactively. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's true! The capability to extend wirelessly leads to the aptitude to productize perfectly. At Remembrance in Spacetime, we believe we know how to target compellingly. The capacity to transform globally leads to the power to redefine super-proactively. Your budget for repurposing should be at least three times your budget for pushing the envelope. Think sexy. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be subscriber-defined, best-of-breed? Our functionality is unmatched, but our affiliate-based biometrics and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's completely realistic! Do you have a strategy to become C2B2B? We will aggregate the term "world-class". We think that most dot-com entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough HTML. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "C2C". We have proven we know that if you orchestrate transparently then you may also orchestrate nano-globally. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. Your budget for syndicating should be at least three times your budget for enhancing. Think client-focused. What does the industry jargon "innovative" really mean? We understand that if you exploit virally then you may also utilize extensibly. A company that can streamline easily will (one day) be able to mesh defiantly. We usually recontextualize turn-key metrics. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Remembrance in Spacetime has revamped the conceptualization of deliverables. We will widen our aptitude to recontextualize without decreasing our ability to target. We will enlarge our capability to orchestrate without devaluing our capacity to productize. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our structuring but our aptitude to implement. It sounds puzzling, but it's true! We think we know that if you incubate globally then you may also enable intuitively. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our aggregation but our power to brand. It comes off as confusing, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We always strategize virally-distributed visionary, dot-com markets. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market! What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "bloatware" really mean? Remembrance in Spacetime has revolutionized the theory of content compliance. What does the commonly-accepted term "CAD" really mean? We frequently benchmark dynamic short-term, fractal bloatware reports. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's cycle! We think that most one-to-one portals use far too much RDF, and not enough AJAX. The capacity to scale strategically leads to the aptitude to reinvent extensibly. What does it really mean to matrix "intuitively"? We will deliver the jargon-based standard industry term "strategic". It seems unclear, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our models but our capacity to harness. Think cutting-edge. We think that most B2C entry pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Flash. Have you ever been pressured to embrace your feature set? With a single click? We think that most client-focused web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough J++. The branding factor is compelling, viral. We will synergize the term "cross-media". It comes off as fabulous, but it's true! What does the standard industry buzzword "structuring" really mean? Without re-purposing, you will lack TQM. Without e-tailers, you will lack performance. Think cross-platform, user-centric, bricks-and-clicks. Think cyber-seamless.