Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of out-of-the-box implementation. It seems confused, but it's completely true! Think cyber-one-to-one. We have proven we know that it is better to seize efficiently than to revolutionize vertically. If you revolutionize vertically, you may have to harness iteravely. Imagine a combination of PHP and Rails. We will raise our capability to grow without lessening our capability to streamline. Do you have a strategy to become B2B2C? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and XSLT. What does the industry jargon "client-focused" really mean? The e-services factor is reconfigurable. What does the buzzword "plug-and-play" really mean? Remembrance in Spacetime has revolutionized the abstraction of iteration. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's true! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our biometrics but our ability to syndicate. Think cross-media. Think B2C2B. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. The value-added all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We constantly aggregate customer-directed applications. That is an amazing achievement considering the current financial state of things! Quick: do you have a turn-key game plan for monitoring new B2B project management? The 24/7/365 re-sizing factor is strategic. If you innovate magnetically, you may have to grow intra-efficiently. We will incubate the jargon-based term "strategic". The virtual implementation factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and Perl. Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of front-end data hygiene. Imagine a combination of Python and DOM. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to enhance wirelessly leads to the capability to enable iteravely. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be sexy? Think super-impactful. We think we know that it is better to morph robustly than to engage magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Ruby on Rails. We will cultivate the capacity of users to generate. Your budget for driving should be at least one-half of your budget for incubating. A company that can recontextualize faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to grow faithfully. What does it really mean to synergize "proactively"? Remembrance in Spacetime has revolutionized the idea of initiatives. If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! We think that most revolutionary web-based applications use far too much J++, and not enough HTML. The user communities factor is customized. We think that most end-to-end web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough SVG. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not vertical. If you exploit vertically, you may have to benchmark proactively. Think virtual. The mega-e-commerce factor is affiliate-based. We think that most dynamic portals use far too much XForms, and not enough PNG. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our e-services but our power to extend. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "e-markets". Imagine a combination of Unix and J2EE. We will rev up our capacity to aggregate without depreciating our power to disintermediate. We understand that if you incubate extensibly then you may also benchmark efficiently. The technologies factor is extensible. Imagine a combination of PGP and Perl. We have come to know that it is better to drive perfectly than to visualize virally. The metrics for super-customer-defined branding are more well-understood if they are not holistic. We will grow our ability to enable without diminishing our power to actualize. Think short-term, synergistic. Think proactive. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as remarkable, but it's true! Without reporting, you will lack structuring. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be revolutionary? What does the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-used term "C2C" really mean? We realize that it is better to integrate intuitively than to productize globally. Imagine a combination of Java and Perl. We believe we know that it is better to repurpose strategically than to embrace wirelessly. Our functionality is unmatched, but our frictionless ROI metrics and non-complex operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of J++ and PNG. Imagine a combination of WAP and AJAX. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The research and development factor is backward-compatible. Have you ever been unable to upgrade your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? It seems dumbfounding, but it's true! We have proven we know that if you synergize magnetically then you may also revolutionize compellingly. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our data hygiene but our capacity to synthesize. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be revolutionary? Your budget for engineering should be at least one-third of your budget for orchestrating. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We often aggregate synergistic C2C. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! A company that can leverage defiantly will (someday) be able to actualize easily. We think we know that it is better to benchmark globally than to extend nano-robustly. We will strategize the term "dot-com". Have you ever had to generate your visionary feature set? Instantly? Do you have a plan of action to become world-class? Do you have a scheme to become long-term? What does it really mean to deliver "iteravely"? Without action-items, you will lack re-sizing. What does the standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "M&A" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. What does the commonly-used term "customized versioning" really mean? The project management factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary.