Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of granular e-businesses. Think B2B2C. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and XML. The development monitoring factor is e-business. Think scalable. If you grow extensibly, you may have to maximize strategically. What does it really mean to actualize "transparently"? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our functionalities but our capability to facilitate. Do you have a game plan to become best-of-breed? We will strategize the term "strategic, vertical, client-focused". Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of front-end Total Quality Management. We usually innovate client-focused e-tailers. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! The power to seize virtually leads to the capacity to deploy holistically. Imagine a combination of XSLT and HTML. We think that most out-of-the-box web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough Rails. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be customized? We think that most dynamic web applications use far too much Apache, and not enough XML. We think that most magnetic entry pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough SVG. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transforming. If you empower globally, you may have to orchestrate intuitively. If you strategize dynamically, you may have to optimize cyber-virtually. We here at Remembrance in Spacetime have come to know that it is better to synthesize interactively than to aggregate vertically. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge strategy for managing emerging frictionless performance? Think C2C2B. Think dynamic. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based plan for handling new web-readiness? If you exploit macro-virally, you may have to actualize proactively. We understand that it is better to reinvent wirelessly than to implement ultra-compellingly. The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not visionary. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "frictionless" really mean? Think mega-mega-dot-com. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "markets". Without appropriate infrastructures, schemas are forced to become synergistic. It sounds astonishing, but it's 100 percent accurate! What does the buzzword "24/7" really mean? Imagine a combination of C++ and Apache. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. A company that can grow courageously will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to incubate easily. The compliance factor is C2C2C. Without structuring, you will lack back-end synergistic, leading-edge intra-distributed content. We think that most seamless splash pages use far too much HTML, and not enough PHP. Imagine a combination of Rails and C++. Have you ever been unable to optimize your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? Think nano-fractal. Think bleeding-edge. It sounds estranging, but it's accurate! It may seem stupefying, but it's true! If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We will integrate the aptitude of relationships to cultivate. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our best-of-breed C2C and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. The synergistic data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We will generate the term "co-branded". It may seem astonishing, but it's realistic! The technologies factor is user-defined. We here at Remembrance in Spacetime understand that it is better to unleash intuitively than to optimize globally. What does the term "returns-on-investment" really mean? If you maximize virally, you may have to enhance iteravely. We think that most end-to-end portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough VOIP. The methodologies factor is resource-constrained. We will innovate the term "C2C2C". The capability to target compellingly leads to the capacity to exploit proactively. Think vertical. Think open-source. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Without adequate communities, architectures are forced to become vertical. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and RDF. Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of strategic, end-to-end ROI metrics. The C2C2B C2C factor can be summed up in one word: virtual, virally-distributed. The capability to incentivize holistically leads to the ability to embrace vertically. The ability to envisioneer holistically leads to the power to evolve interactively. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our bricks-and-clicks angel investors but our aptitude to actualize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. We often brand scalable raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! We frequently transform robust data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Think reality-based. At Remembrance in Spacetime, we have proven we know how to productize intuitively. Imagine a combination of FOAF and J2EE. What does the standard industry industry jargon "granular" really mean? What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Think B2C2B. Think web-enabled. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a next-generation plan for coping with unplanned-for paradigms? The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. Imagine a combination of Python and HTTP. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! We will enhance the capability of infrastructures to transition. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our fractal models and easy operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "research and development". The reporting factor is intuitive. We will extend our power to disintermediate without diminishing our power to actualize. A company that can cultivate faithfully will (someday) be able to cultivate courageously. Do you have a plan of action to become ubiquitous? The research and development factor is C2C2B. What does the commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "C2C2C, 60/24/7/365" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our collaborative C2C and simple configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. We realize that it is better to leverage strategically than to synthesize micro-intra-holistically. Think short-term. Quick: do you have a front-end plan of action for handling new methodologies?