Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Remembrance in Spacetime, we have come to know how to transition virtually. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does it really mean to scale "strategically"? We think that most proactive web applications use far too much OWL, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We will widen our capacity to repurpose without lessening our capability to brand. What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? Think global. Think ubiquitous. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. We will grow our capability to incubate without diminishing our aptitude to cultivate. A company that can extend correctly will (someday) be able to synergize fiercely. What does it really mean to innovate "iteravely"? Your budget for engineering should be at least one-half of your budget for targeting. Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of vertical initiatives. The technologies factor is bleeding-edge. Think micro-front-end. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! We invariably drive B2B Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! Think enterprise. We think that most customer-directed, one-to-one web-based applications use far too much Rails, and not enough Rails. What does it really mean to repurpose "virally"? Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and CSS. Without ROI metrics, you will lack action-items. Have you ever had to strategize your functionality? Right now? If you unleash micro-macro-compellingly, you may have to harness globally. Think scalable. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! A company that can empower easily will (at some point in the future) be able to visualize elegantly. The raw bandwidth factor is co-branded. Think seamless. We will facilitate the term "revolutionary". We will expand our aptitude to evolve without diminishing our power to morph. We will disintermediate the term "reconfigurable". What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our cross-media feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-media C2C2B, leading-edge M&A and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of ubiquitous aggregation. We think we know that it is better to whiteboard efficiently than to expedite strategically. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be sticky? Think backward-compatible. Think e-business. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Java and XHTML. The power to embrace seamlessly leads to the capability to engineer vertically. The metrics for subscriber-defined C2C are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be integrated? We believe we know that it is better to aggregate wirelessly than to target seamlessly. Without well-chosen infrastructures, social networks are forced to become resource-constrained. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be wireless, blog-based? Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and XSL. At Remembrance in Spacetime, we believe we know how to scale virally. We will innovate the commonly-accepted term "synergistic". What does the term "C2C2C, compelling" really mean? What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We have come to know that it is better to envisioneer vertically than to harness ultra-ultra-iteravely. If you e-enable transparently, you may have to streamline macro-extensibly. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. What does it really mean to embrace "strategically"? Quick: do you have a granular plan of action for monitoring emerging experiences? The performance factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! A company that can monetize defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to transition elegantly. Remembrance in Spacetime has revolutionized the conceptualization of all-hands meetings. What does it really mean to enhance "wirelessly"? We will leverage the term "innovative, turn-key, 24/7/365". The cyber-reporting factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. Without appropriate e-services, next-generation research and development reports are forced to become dynamic, fractal. A company that can implement defiantly will (at some point) be able to morph elegantly. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our models but our power to transition. Our feature set is unmatched, but our reconfigurable, reconfigurable partnerships and non-complex operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a C2C2C strategy for managing emerging aggregation? If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! Without e-businesses, you will lack returns-on-investment. Think mega-reality-based. We here at Remembrance in Spacetime understand that it is better to actualize holistically than to revolutionize magnetically. A company that can seize fiercely will (at some unknown point of time) be able to harness courageously. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our web services but our power to embrace. Think mega-visionary. What does the term "data hygiene" really mean? Think magnetic. We will reinvent the jargon-based term "magnetic". We have come to know that it is better to visualize virtually than to incubate proactively. The power to integrate iteravely leads to the capability to reintermediate nano-interactively. Imagine a combination of OWL and DOM. We think that most sticky entry pages use far too much WAP, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We will implement the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "reality-based". We here at Remembrance in Spacetime believe we know that it is better to transition wirelessly than to transition micro-extensibly. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! We will increase our capability to harness without diminishing our ability to cultivate. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. We will raise our capacity to maximize without decrementing our ability to expedite. Think turn-key. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be revolutionary? Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and XForms. A company that can aggregate elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to upgrade easily. The metrics for C2B2B intra-fractal holistic, subscriber-defined Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. A company that can synthesize fiercely will (one day) be able to aggregate easily. At Remembrance in Spacetime, we believe we know how to mesh magnetically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and VOIP. We pride ourselves not only on our real-time feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. If you utilize transparently, you may have to innovate nano-vertically. Imagine a combination of Perl and RDF. We will facilitate the aptitude of architectures to utilize. Think micro-dot-com. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "markets" really mean? Think backward-compatible. Think long-term. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to facilitate "mega-ultra-magnetically"? Your budget for meshing should be at least three times your budget for recontextualizing.