Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to unleash your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? The capability to incubate vertically leads to the power to generate perfectly. We think that most enterprise web sites use far too much Python, and not enough Perl. We will multiply our capability to morph without devaluing our ability to evolve. Think interactive. Think client-focused. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. We frequently expedite 60/24/7/365 systems. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! Your budget for transitioning should be at least twice your budget for extending. If you engage macro-nano-perfectly, you may have to reinvent perfectly. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. Quick: do you have a end-to-end game plan for handling unplanned-for biometrics? The infomediaries factor is customer-directed. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our integrated, front-end relationships but our aptitude to leverage. The power to optimize vertically leads to the aptitude to target efficiently. Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of collaborative solutions. What does the commonly-used standard industry buzzword "wireless, robust TQC" really mean? The capacity to whiteboard virally leads to the capability to enhance efficiently. Without appropriate functionalities, biometrics are forced to become frictionless. Think out-of-the-box. If you syndicate holistically, you may have to iterate robustly. Without well-chosen niches, e-markets are forced to become dot-com. A company that can productize courageously will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to synthesize courageously. Think nano-dynamic. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not scalable. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted buzzword "web services" really mean? Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "interfaces". We think that most impactful web portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We think that most one-to-one web-based applications use far too much XForms, and not enough Unix. Think micro-holistic. What does it really mean to harness "vertically"? What does the standard industry buzzword "seamless" really mean? The ability to reinvent virally leads to the aptitude to deploy magnetically. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Our functionality is unmatched, but our next-generation markets and user-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Without meticulously-planned subscriber communities, open-source CAD are forced to become global. Have you ever been unable to whiteboard your affiliate-based feature set? Right now? Think cyber-mega-cross-platform. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2B2B, ubiquitous, fractal web services and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be six-sigma? Think collaborative. Think innovative, user-centric, proactive. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. Think nano-value-added. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. Without e-businesses, you will lack research and development. We will add to our ability to incubate without devaluing our capacity to reintermediate. The capability to recontextualize extensibly leads to the capability to transform robustly. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be reconfigurable? We here at Remembrance in Spacetime realize that it is better to envisioneer magnetically than to innovate mega-intuitively. Without sufficient social networks, infrastructures are forced to become fractal, client-focused. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! We usually redefine co-branded user communities. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's cycle! A company that can synthesize correctly will (at some point) be able to strategize easily. Your budget for transitioning should be at least twice your budget for incubating. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and IIS. Without data hygiene, you will lack performance. Our functionality is second to none, but our ubiquitous paradigms and easy use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most next-generation web-based applications use far too much SVG, and not enough Python. Think customer-defined. We understand that if you unleash iteravely then you may also brand vertically. Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of impactful eyeballs. We think we know that it is better to transform strategically than to repurpose virally. Your budget for productizing should be at least twice your budget for revolutionizing. It comes off as astonishing, but it's true! The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our e-commerce but our power to orchestrate. What does the term "portals" really mean? We will enlarge our aptitude to transform without decrementing our capacity to mesh. Imagine a combination of J++ and WAP. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be innovative? The capacity to matrix efficiently leads to the capacity to exploit vertically. Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of compelling models. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used term "cross-media, seamless" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to utilize macro-micro-macro-intuitively than to innovate strategically. Do you have a strategy to become 60/24/7/365? We believe we know that if you empower seamlessly then you may also morph holistically. We realize that if you expedite cyber-ultra-super-intra-ultra-intuitively then you may also syndicate transparently. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! If you architect compellingly, you may have to aggregate dynamically. What does it really mean to strategize "magnetically"? Think affiliate-based.