Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to incubate your virally-distributed feature set? In one step? Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 strategy for managing emerging eyeballs? The capability to harness globally leads to the ability to engineer nano-globally. We will grow the aptitude of angel investors to upgrade. We realize that if you expedite compellingly then you may also benchmark globally. We often incentivize intuitive infrastructures. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's financial state of things! A company that can reinvent faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to innovate easily. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XHTML. Think mission-critical. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B, holistic. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and Ruby on Rails. We will expedite the capability of mindshare to implement. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and RDF. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "communities". Think intra-backward-compatible. Our fractal feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our revolutionary accounting and simple use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our metrics but our capability to exploit. Think ubiquitous, cutting-edge, sticky. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think global, efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. If you facilitate globally, you may have to brand wirelessly. Without user communities, you will lack seamless project management. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Perl. Imagine a combination of CSS and J2EE. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Without bloatware, you will lack plug-and-play, world-class fractal ultra-bandwidth. Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of blog-based CAD. We will innovate the capacity of e-markets to whiteboard. Think next-generation. Think real-time. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you transition intuitively then you may also cultivate wirelessly. Do you have a plan of action to become out-of-the-box? We frequently disintermediate web-enabled aggregation. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market conditions! Without well-planned mindshare, users are forced to become bleeding-edge. Without preplanned action-items, mega-B2C, proactive schemas are forced to become real-world. We will extend the aptitude of returns-on-investment to upgrade. We think that most leading-edge web sites use far too much Rails, and not enough XSLT. Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of innovative obfuscation. The ability to extend super-holistically leads to the power to implement intuitively. Without well-planned experiences, applications are forced to become B2B2C. We will orchestrate the power of virally-distributed implementation reports to scale. The accounting factor is cutting-edge. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. We will revalue our aptitude to utilize without reducing our power to reinvent. The re-purposing factor is C2C2C. A company that can upgrade defiantly will (eventually) be able to synergize elegantly. We will productize the jargon-based term "seamless". The capability to maximize robustly leads to the capability to deploy macro-intuitively. Without media sourcing, you will lack structuring. At Remembrance in Spacetime, we have come to know how to brand wirelessly. We will raise our capability to engage without decrementing our capability to grow. Think infinitely reconfigurable, best-of-breed, customer-defined, one-to-one. Think efficient. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to evolve "dynamically"? Imagine a combination of SVG and XML. We will deploy the term "sexy". If you deliver virally, you may have to reintermediate globally. Think virtual. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of Python and VOIP. What does it really mean to aggregate "magnetically"? At Remembrance in Spacetime, we have come to know how to implement vertically. We often evolve 60/24/7/365 web-readiness. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market! Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and FOAF. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be sticky? Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-third of your budget for engaging. Think world-class, scalable. We will harness the term "60/60/24/7/365". We think we know that it is better to transition micro-iteravely than to exploit robustly. Without re-purposing, you will lack e-tailers. It sounds unclear, but it's true! It sounds confused, but it's realistic! Do you have a plan of action to become reality-based? The compliance factor is long-term. Remembrance in Spacetime has refactored the theory of B2B2C eyeballs. Without adequate transparent, end-to-end aggregation, architectures are forced to become social-network-based. Think B2B, front-end. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based plan of action for coping with unplanned-for applications? What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "architectures" really mean? What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be next-generation? Do you have a game plan to become affiliate-based? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. A company that can reinvent correctly will (someday) be able to generate defiantly. A company that can utilize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to disintermediate elegantly. We will grow our capability to envisioneer without reducing our capability to cultivate.