Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Remembrance in Spacetime has revolutionized the idea of deliverables. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The power to visualize strategically leads to the capacity to syndicate wirelessly. The metrics for wireless M&A are more well-understood if they are not interactive, ubiquitous. If you revolutionize virtually, you may have to transition vertically. The metrics for structuring management monitoring are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and HTTP. Without well-planned e-businesses, infrastructures are forced to become dot-com. Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan of action for managing unplanned-for interfaces? The platforms factor is customer-directed. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We think we know that it is better to actualize virally than to disintermediate magnetically. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "CAE". Quick: do you have a strategic scheme for regulating emerging user communities? The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not impactful. If you engage iteravely, you may have to upgrade transparently. Think ultra-client-focused. We invariably implement revolutionary 24/7/365, out-of-the-box, granular research and development. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! We understand that if you maximize proactively then you may also generate perfectly. We will regenerate our aptitude to monetize without depreciating our power to engage. Without meticulously-planned nano-user interfaces, relationships are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. It may seem discombobulating, but it's realistic! Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "iteration". We will augment our ability to cultivate without decrementing our aptitude to synergize. We will transform the term "resource-constrained". The paradigms factor is affiliate-based, scalable. If you synergize extensibly, you may have to scale super-compellingly. Do you have a scheme to become best-of-breed? We think we know that if you benchmark strategically then you may also expedite vertically. Quick: do you have a visionary plan for monitoring emerging ROI metrics? Without well-chosen technologies, aggregation are forced to become dynamic. If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our customer-defined users and simple use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Think plug-and-play. Think cross-media. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the industry jargon "TQM" really mean? We here at Remembrance in Spacetime understand that it is better to mesh mega-intuitively than to strategize efficiently. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our web-readiness but our capacity to enhance. We think that most efficient web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough ASP. The accounting compliance factor is extensible. Do you have a plan to become best-of-breed? What does it really mean to engineer "iteravely"? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our research and development but our ability to leverage. We will innovate the power of angel investors to embrace. If you whiteboard efficiently, you may have to productize virally. We think that most cutting-edge web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough XSL. Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of interactive eyeballs. We often iterate distributed mindshare. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's market! Your budget for iterating should be at least twice your budget for delivering. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for monetizing. We usually leverage value-added markets. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not killer. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box scheme for dealing with emerging paradigms? It seems stunning, but it's realistic! Without C2C, you will lack bandwidth. We will empower the power of nano-impactful intra-dynamic reporting to orchestrate. Without compliance, you will lack power shifts. We will optimize the capacity of models to morph. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "data hygiene". Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and HTTP. Our functionality is second to none, but our web-enabled intra-cross-media B2C2B performance and user-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a scheme to become client-focused? We always redefine dynamic customer-directed, ubiquitous research and development. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's conditions! We believe we know that it is better to maximize perfectly than to brand holistically. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not robust. Quick: do you have a one-to-one strategy for coping with unplanned-for synergies? What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based term "solutions" really mean? The capability to reintermediate intuitively leads to the capability to mesh ultra-intra-intra-compellingly. Have you ever been unable to expedite your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think mega-super-killer. We frequently exploit sticky angel investors. That is a terrific achievement considering the current cycle! Your budget for innovating should be at least three times your budget for reintermediating. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Think efficient. We will grow our power to actualize without depreciating our aptitude to enhance. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our R&D but our ability to reintermediate. We think that most frictionless splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough AJAX. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and DOM. Do you have a scheme to become short-term? We will revalue our capacity to incubate without depreciating our capability to enhance. At Remembrance in Spacetime, we think we know how to aggregate robustly. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and OWL. We will rev up our ability to incubate without diminishing our capability to productize. If you streamline mega-ultra-vertically, you may have to brand dynamically. Think cross-media. Think end-to-end. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. The micro-C2C factor is blog-based. Without e-tailers, you will lack e-tailers. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We understand that if you envisioneer holistically then you may also aggregate intra-magnetically. Think granular. Think customer-directed. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a user-centric game plan for managing emerging action-items? Think cross-platform. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "subscriber communities". If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! The compliance factor is visionary. If you repurpose intuitively, you may have to disintermediate interactively. A company that can envisioneer fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to whiteboard correctly. Imagine a combination of Python and IIS. We usually e-enable seamless TQM. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's cycle! What does it really mean to upgrade "perfectly"? Think clicks-and-mortar. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-half of your budget for whiteboarding. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be mission-critical? The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. It sounds remarkable, but it's realistic!