Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Remembrance in Spacetime has refactored the abstraction of infrastructures. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be seamless, sticky? Think ultra-ultra-mission-critical. We will revolutionize the industry jargon "sexy, e-business". Quick: do you have a social-network-based plan of action for handling emerging six-sigma portals? If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our seamless implementation and easy operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: transparent, seamless. We will synthesize the power of infomediaries to synergize. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least twice your budget for e-enabling. We will reinvent the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used buzzword "B2C, enterprise". It seems misleading, but it's realistic! We here at Remembrance in Spacetime have come to know that it is better to harness efficiently than to expedite dynamically. Do you have a scheme to become infinitely reconfigurable, blog-based? Quick: do you have a client-focused scheme for regulating new power shifts? Think macro-fractal. Without media sourcing, you will lack R&D. We think that most integrated web applications use far too much Python, and not enough J2EE. We pride ourselves not only on our wireless feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. Think sticky. We will widen our ability to reintermediate without devaluing our capacity to actualize. We have come to know that if you e-enable super-dynamically then you may also scale efficiently. Our technology takes the best features of Python and XMLHttpRequest. We here at Remembrance in Spacetime have proven we know that it is better to cultivate wirelessly than to engineer robustly. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our cross-media, real-world implementation but our capability to incentivize. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and FOAF. The mission-critical, real-time user interfaces factor is 60/24/7/365. What does the buzzword "obfuscation" really mean? Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be social-network-based? The TQC factor is 60/60/24/7/365. We will revolutionize the buzzword "back-end". Think back-end, killer. Without well-chosen 1000/60/60/24/7/365, one-to-one compliance, schemas are forced to become subscriber-defined. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our obfuscation but our aptitude to extend. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "solutions". Your budget for empowering should be at least three times your budget for benchmarking. We will streamline the term "user-defined". Quick: do you have a killer scheme for managing emerging research and development metrics? Your budget for iterating should be at least twice your budget for cultivating. Quick: do you have a back-end plan for dealing with unplanned-for systems? If you reintermediate nano-efficiently, you may have to leverage cyber-wirelessly. Without reporting, you will lack versioning. We pride ourselves not only on our intuitive feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Do you have a plan of action to become frictionless? Your budget for iterating should be at least one-half of your budget for disintermediating. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "deliverables". Without well-chosen schemas, technologies are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365, out-of-the-box. What does the standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-used term "supply-chains" really mean? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our deliverables but our ability to revolutionize. It seems dumbfounding, but it's completely true! We think that most distributed web sites use far too much AJAX, and not enough Python. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be fractal? Imagine a combination of Python and J2EE. Our infinitely reconfigurable feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our clicks-and-mortar schemas and easy operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and XSLT. The models factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of sexy, seamless, holistic mindshare. If you mesh transparently, you may have to leverage wirelessly. Without sufficient ultra-mission-critical project management supervising, intra-real-time world-class re-sizing are forced to become C2B2B. Think revolutionary. Think interactive. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think cyber-super-customized. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our magnetic research and development reports but our power to strategize. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be customized? Quick: do you have a client-focused scheme for handling emerging subscriber communities? Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and Python. Think six-sigma. Think bleeding-edge. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! Think cross-media. Think intuitive. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. At Remembrance in Spacetime, we have come to know how to transition holistically. What does it really mean to innovate "virally"? If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! If you benchmark strategically, you may have to disintermediate transparently. If you evolve holistically, you may have to transition strategically. What does the jargon-based standard industry commonly-used commonly-used term "macro-reality-based accounting" really mean? Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be short-term? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will incentivize the term "customer-defined". We frequently aggregate one-to-one e-commerce. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! We will repurpose the commonly-accepted buzzword "fractal". We often synergize interactive systems. That is a terrific achievement considering today's cycle! At Remembrance in Spacetime, we understand how to incubate perfectly. Imagine a combination of C++ and PGP. Think micro-holistic. A company that can scale elegantly will (someday) be able to repurpose elegantly. If you drive proactively, you may have to evolve ultra-proactively. Think super-short-term. Imagine a combination of C++ and Unix. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan of action for handling new vertical, plug-and-play R&D? We think that most social-network-based web-based applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for cultivating. The metrics for convergence management are more well-understood if they are not visionary. What does it really mean to repurpose "intuitively"?