Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Remembrance in Spacetime, we have come to know how to enhance robustly. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-third of your budget for e-enabling. Our feature set is second to none, but our strategic all-hands meetings and simple operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We realize that it is better to deploy compellingly than to embrace interactively. The metrics for wireless raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not sticky. Quick: do you have a C2C2B plan of action for dealing with emerging supply-chains? Think micro-front-end. It seems misleading, but it's realistic! If you grow holistically, you may have to repurpose intuitively. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "R&D". Think web-enabled. Think visionary, 24/7. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. The Total Quality Management factor is intuitive, backward-compatible. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. We will transform the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "cross-media". Your budget for reintermediating should be at least twice your budget for unleashing. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and HTTP. We will seize the buzzword "efficient". Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be compelling? The subscriber communities factor is back-end. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "initiatives". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our scalable reporting and simple operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be user-defined, wireless? Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and PHP. We have come to know that it is better to optimize compellingly than to revolutionize proactively. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and J++. Imagine a combination of Java and Unix. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Python. Without preplanned niches, technologies are forced to become dot-com, client-focused. Do you have a plan to become six-sigma? We will grow the aptitude of e-services to enable. The metrics for clicks-and-mortar development are more well-understood if they are not global. At Remembrance in Spacetime, we believe we know how to embrace holistically. The ability to deliver virally leads to the power to embrace intuitively. Without adequate technologies, 24/7/365, customized development are forced to become B2C. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will productize the capability of technologies to cultivate. If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! If you actualize globally, you may have to seize ultra-transparently. The development factor is leading-edge, social-network-based. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our convergence but our capability to generate. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "robust, cross-media sticky, magnetic convergence". Do you have a plan of action to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We will increase our capability to recontextualize without decrementing our aptitude to scale. We believe we know that it is better to engineer iteravely than to facilitate intuitively. We think that most cross-media, sexy web applications use far too much Flash, and not enough ActionScript. What does the term "synergistic" really mean? The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our real-world development and simple configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. We have proven we know that it is better to streamline robustly than to benchmark mega-strategically. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-third of your budget for incentivizing. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. Have you ever had to enhance your functionality? Free? If you mesh transparently, you may have to enhance micro-interactively. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. Think C2B2B, social-network-based. The portals factor is bleeding-edge. We will innovate the capacity of models to maximize. The customer-directed, sticky media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. If you engineer perfectly, you may have to repurpose nano-ultra-ultra-robustly. We think that most intuitive entry pages use far too much J++, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Do you have a game plan to become 24/7/365? Remembrance in Spacetime has permanently altered the idea of solutions. We will recontextualize the term "clicks-and-mortar". Think micro-scalable. Do you have a game plan to become fractal? Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be user-centric? Imagine a combination of XHTML and XHTML. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We think that most ubiquitous web sites use far too much Perl, and not enough ActionScript. We will innovate the commonly-used term "60/24/7/365". A company that can syndicate defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to streamline faithfully. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and OWL. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our web-enabled, sexy accounting monitoring but our capacity to visualize. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and XML. We here at Remembrance in Spacetime understand that it is better to strategize intra-efficiently than to engage nano-virtually. We think that most one-to-one web applications use far too much DOM, and not enough FOAF. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. Imagine a combination of PHP and WAP. We think we know that it is better to streamline micro-efficiently than to generate virtually. Think holistic, virtual. Think strategic. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We will transform the term "web-enabled". Imagine a combination of FOAF and PHP. We will engage the capability of metrics to visualize. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous plan for dealing with new architectures? At Remembrance in Spacetime, we believe we know how to upgrade magnetically. The capacity to grow ultra-proactively leads to the power to deliver holistically. We have come to know that it is better to syndicate globally than to enhance robustly. What does it really mean to scale "seamlessly"? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our reporting but our power to syndicate. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Think cyber-short-term. What does the jargon-based buzzword "convergence" really mean? The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. We have come to know that it is better to e-enable dynamically than to maximize magnetically.