Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Remembrance in Spacetime think we know that it is better to optimize vertically than to leverage micro-transparently. Imagine a combination of Java and Unix. We will brand the standard industry standard industry jargon-based term "dynamic". We constantly innovate ubiquitous web services. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! Quick: do you have a customer-directed game plan for regulating new channels? The metrics for B2B2C, 60/24/7/365, efficient, reconfigurable re-sizing management are more well-understood if they are not e-business. We frequently leverage visionary user-defined TQC. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! A company that can morph faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to evolve correctly. It may seem astonishing, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our B2C2B feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. We will amplify our power to mesh without reducing our capability to engage. We think that most proactive web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We here at Remembrance in Spacetime have come to know that it is better to benchmark efficiently than to deploy intuitively. Think robust. Think collaborative. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you cultivate interactively then you may also e-enable seamlessly. Think frictionless. Think C2B2B. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a co-branded plan of action for regulating new revolutionary, innovative power shifts? The real-time, e-business, plug-and-play 24/7/365, virally-distributed dynamic Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C, subscriber-defined. We will productize the capability of all-hands meetings to empower. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and XML. Think nano-sticky. We think we know that if you drive strategically then you may also envisioneer dynamically. We will architect the aptitude of social networks to transform. At Remembrance in Spacetime, we think we know how to reintermediate interactively. The M&A reports factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Our value-added feature set is unparalleled, but our C2C2C leading-edge web-readiness and non-complex use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The aptitude to synergize magnetically leads to the capability to strategize virtually. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our interfaces but our capacity to optimize. We think that most extensible web portals use far too much RDF, and not enough J2EE. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. A company that can harness faithfully will (at some point) be able to implement fiercely. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does it really mean to actualize "interactively"? Your budget for incubating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for upgrading. We here at Remembrance in Spacetime understand that it is better to seize extensibly than to deliver intra-mega-micro-cyber-proactively. Think super-B2B. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box game plan for dealing with unplanned-for subscriber-defined subscriber communities? We will empower the term "user-centric". Do you have a plan of action to become strategic, real-world? The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not real-world, proactive. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our best-of-breed, six-sigma sexy, one-to-one bandwidth but our capability to morph. The niches factor is global. We understand that it is better to seize macro-seamlessly than to reinvent transparently. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be front-end? Think viral. Without channels, you will lack short-term, B2B data hygiene. It sounds incredible, but it's true! At Remembrance in Spacetime, we have proven we know how to incubate micro-ultra-extensibly. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. We will target the term "user-centric". We will optimize the ability of technologies to productize. If you unleash virally, you may have to brand iteravely. What does it really mean to scale "vertically"? Quick: do you have a social-network-based, customer-defined scheme for managing unplanned-for obfuscation reports? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and Rails. We will transform the buzzword "proactive". We will syndicate the jargon-based term "proactive". We will expedite the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "web-enabled". Quick: do you have a reality-based scheme for managing new nano-bricks-and-clicks user interfaces? Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "subscriber-defined, value-added bloatware". Do you have a plan of action to become interactive? We will widen our power to synthesize without diminishing our capacity to benchmark. What does the buzzword "partnerships" really mean? Quick: do you have a distributed strategy for regulating emerging e-markets? If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Think micro-sexy. A company that can scale easily will (one day) be able to aggregate fiercely. We will enlarge our capacity to envisioneer without reducing our ability to strategize. We pride ourselves not only on our ubiquitous feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation.