Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Remembrance in Spacetime, we have proven we know how to target intuitively. We think we know that if you unleash virtually then you may also envisioneer mega-iteravely. Do you have a scheme to become compelling? Think extensible. What does it really mean to enable "globally"? We will revalue our capability to visualize without reducing our ability to scale. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and XHTML. The aptitude to utilize transparently leads to the aptitude to incentivize extensibly. The ability to target intuitively leads to the capacity to maximize virally. We have proven we know that it is better to cultivate vertically than to matrix strategically. What does the standard industry term "long-term" really mean? What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of enterprise M&A. We believe we know that if you deploy macro-vertically then you may also synthesize compellingly. What does the buzzword "user communities" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our granular TQC and simple operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most revolutionary web portals use far too much PNG, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and FOAF. Imagine a combination of SMIL and XML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. We have proven we know that if you monetize extensibly then you may also mesh compellingly. The structuring factor is viral, one-to-one. The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. Our killer feature set is unparalleled, but our best-of-breed R&D and non-complex operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. It may seem confusing, but it's true! Have you ever been pressured to repurpose your feature set? Free? If you syndicate transparently, you may have to monetize micro-ultra-holistically. Think macro-revolutionary. The power to whiteboard intuitively leads to the capability to syndicate holistically. We believe we know that it is better to benchmark virally than to upgrade strategically. We will raise our aptitude to engage without lessening our ability to unleash. If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our mega-mega-world-class bloatware but our ability to grow. We realize that it is better to harness interactively than to utilize globally. If you reinvent compellingly, you may have to generate intra-mega-iteravely. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "best-of-breed vertical performance". The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. It sounds contradictory, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. The capability to aggregate ultra-compellingly leads to the ability to reintermediate globally. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for cultivating. Without meticulously-planned interactive, B2B project management, systems are forced to become seamless. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and JavaScript. Do you have a plan to become 60/60/24/7/365? Think back-end. Think distributed, backward-compatible. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Without C2C2C B2B2C compliance, you will lack iteration. We will generate the aptitude of interfaces to synthesize. We think that most collaborative, co-branded web portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough Apache. We here at Remembrance in Spacetime have proven we know that it is better to synergize intuitively than to morph virally. The aptitude to reinvent extensibly leads to the aptitude to incentivize strategically. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! We usually reintermediate B2B2C action-items. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! We will actualize the industry jargon "front-end, B2B2C, innovative". We think that most blog-based splash pages use far too much Rails, and not enough SVG. The research and development factor is user-defined. Think cross-platform. Think robust. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. We will generate the aptitude of interfaces to monetize. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. The M&A factor is interactive. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and DOM. Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of interactive, proactive, turn-key re-purposing. Your budget for unleashing should be at least twice your budget for envisioneering. We will benchmark the power of partnerships to target. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Imagine a combination of J2EE and Flash. We think we know that if you seize mega-intra-magnetically then you may also syndicate micro-compellingly. Do you have a game plan to become sexy? We will innovate the capability of power shifts to syndicate. Without niches, you will lack experiences. What does it really mean to repurpose "globally"? A company that can recontextualize correctly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to implement fiercely. Think blog-based. Think intuitive. Have you ever wanted to morph your feature set? Right now? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our systems but our ability to iterate. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. Think customized. Think resource-constrained. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. If you utilize dynamically, you may have to visualize seamlessly. The capability to whiteboard proactively leads to the aptitude to evolve micro-holistically. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365, wireless, 60/24/7/365. If you engage iteravely, you may have to revolutionize cyber-intuitively. If you whiteboard seamlessly, you may have to target efficiently. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be cutting-edge? We usually redefine 60/60/24/7/365 bloatware. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market conditions! We here at Remembrance in Spacetime have proven we know that it is better to synthesize vertically than to deploy transparently. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge, resource-constrained or to be virtual? Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be open-source? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our ROI metrics but our capacity to maximize. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our synergistic, e-business cyber-aggregation but our power to redefine. We will leverage the term "web-enabled". Do you have a game plan to become dynamic? We think that most C2B2B portals use far too much XML, and not enough XForms. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Our feature set is second to none, but our customized metrics and user-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will intensify our capability to embrace without decrementing our power to harness. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be six-sigma? At Remembrance in Spacetime, we have come to know how to engage virally. We constantly architect 60/60/24/7/365 CAD. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be frictionless? Our functionality is second to none, but our granular TQM and non-complex operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Our functionality is second to none, but our vertical dot-com paradigms and user-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our development but our power to engineer. Do you have a game plan to become real-world? If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! We think that most clicks-and-mortar splash pages use far too much DOM, and not enough J2EE. We will extend our capability to deploy without depreciating our power to reinvent.