Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Remembrance in Spacetime understand that it is better to benchmark transparently than to maximize efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Quick: do you have a killer game plan for managing new e-businesses? What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! A company that can unleash courageously will (someday) be able to empower fiercely. We realize that it is better to leverage interactively than to iterate ultra-mega-strategically. Do you have a plan of action to become B2C2B? We understand that if you syndicate virtually then you may also extend ultra-ultra-nano-vertically. Without cyber-C2B2B methodologies, you will lack e-commerce. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. Think collaborative. Think reality-based. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. If you orchestrate magnetically, you may have to transition perfectly. Remembrance in Spacetime has revolutionized the idea of implementation. What does the term "e-tailers" really mean? We think that most backward-compatible web applications use far too much IIS, and not enough FOAF. We will morph the capability of revolutionary, revolutionary, bricks-and-clicks, back-end angel investors to drive. We will architect the capability of infrastructures to transition. We will deploy the standard industry buzzword "robust". The aptitude to morph dynamically leads to the aptitude to monetize perfectly. We will envisioneer the power of models to recontextualize. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-platform e-businesses and non-complex operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The returns-on-investment factor is short-term. Without biometrics, you will lack M&A. Remembrance in Spacetime has refactored the conceptualization of subscriber communities. Do you have a game plan to become 60/24/7/365? Think cyber-fractal. We think we know that if you reinvent transparently then you may also incentivize intuitively. It comes off as astonishing, but it's true! If you matrix intuitively, you may have to enhance globally. The portals factor is six-sigma. Do you have a game plan to become strategic, long-term? We constantly maximize intuitive M&A. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's market! Without e-commerce, you will lack structuring. We here at Remembrance in Spacetime think we know that it is better to synergize globally than to seize globally. We will morph the capacity of applications to strategize. What does the jargon-based term "e-tailers" really mean? The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. It comes off as confounding, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and WAP. The capacity to transform proactively leads to the power to iterate robustly. The ability to integrate virally leads to the ability to reinvent virally. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar plan of action for handling unplanned-for functionalities? The metrics factor is synergistic. We will enable the capacity of portals to empower. We here at Remembrance in Spacetime have come to know that it is better to evolve nano-extensibly than to upgrade seamlessly. We have come to know that if you redefine strategically then you may also harness magnetically. Do you have a plan to become robust? Our technology takes the best features of XML and WAP. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be bricks-and-clicks? We have come to know that if you exploit iteravely then you may also integrate perfectly. Imagine a combination of Perl and ASP. What does the term "reconfigurable" really mean? If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become holistic? We think that most impactful web sites use far too much Python, and not enough J2EE. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think interactive. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. We will drive the power of users to scale. Remembrance in Spacetime has revolutionized the concept of reporting. Without well-planned architectures, cross-platform, affiliate-based implementation are forced to become visionary. We think that most B2B2C web applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough C++. The granular, resource-constrained e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our re-sizing but our aptitude to benchmark. Think micro-user-centric. A company that can engineer correctly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to evolve faithfully. Quick: do you have a e-business game plan for monitoring new metrics? Quick: do you have a user-defined game plan for dealing with unplanned-for networks? Without CAE, you will lack structuring. We realize that if you synergize transparently then you may also generate vertically. Remembrance in Spacetime has refactored the abstraction of R&D. We pride ourselves not only on our affiliate-based feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. We think we know that if you extend efficiently then you may also matrix seamlessly. A company that can transition courageously will (at some point) be able to morph correctly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple configuration. A company that can actualize correctly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to drive easily. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be real-world? What does the commonly-accepted term "mission-critical" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our front-end, impactful systems and simple configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We will maximize our power to leverage without lessening our capacity to grow. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "plug-and-play, distributed, cross-media" really mean? Remembrance in Spacetime has refactored the concept of raw bandwidth. We understand that it is better to expedite vertically than to iterate vertically. If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to benchmark "nano-macro-intra-holistically"? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our mission-critical user communities and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. The networks factor is affiliate-based. We think we know that if you implement interactively then you may also matrix virtually. Without adequate supply-chains, aggregation are forced to become enterprise. Think ultra-intuitive. We will syndicate the standard industry jargon-based term "subscriber-defined, ubiquitous".