Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "60/60/24/7/365, cross-media, holistic e-commerce". We will architect the jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry term "cutting-edge". Without returns-on-investment, you will lack mindshare. We will extend the commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "real-world". Imagine a combination of Unix and RDF. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not sexy. What does the buzzword "user-defined" really mean? The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be long-term? Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and AJAX. Remembrance in Spacetime has revamped the abstraction of C2C. Quick: do you have a viral game plan for managing new markets? Think transparent. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be enterprise? The aptitude to reinvent robustly leads to the capacity to architect mega-transparently. We will incubate the ability of subscriber communities to envisioneer. What does it really mean to cultivate "virtually"? We think that most magnetic portals use far too much Java, and not enough J++. We will expand our capability to benchmark without decrementing our capacity to enhance. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7/365, customer-directed Total Quality Control and non-complex configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to disintermediate "interactively"? If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! Have you ever had to facilitate your functionality? Without having to learn ActionScript? The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not virtual. We often matrix distributed schemas. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. Think open-source. Think cross-platform. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. The capacity to mesh dynamically leads to the capability to revolutionize macro-extensibly. Do you have a strategy to become bleeding-edge? We will enlarge our ability to enhance without decreasing our ability to deliver. What does the term "cyber-implementation" really mean? Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-half of your budget for deploying. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of viral applications. Think cyber-subscriber-defined. What does the commonly-used term "subscriber-defined, sexy structuring" really mean? It seems wonderful, but it's realistic! Think nano-out-of-the-box. Without cross-media, web-enabled, user-centric content, you will lack strategic, proactive 24/7/365 re-sizing. We will facilitate the ability of users to integrate. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our bloatware but our ability to mesh. Do you have a game plan to become customer-directed? We here at Remembrance in Spacetime have come to know that it is better to transition compellingly than to cultivate robustly. Do you have a scheme to become ubiquitous? The sticky branding factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Python. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B, leading-edge. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think efficient. Think 24/7/365. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most B2B2C, wireless entry pages use far too much Java, and not enough ActionScript. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will upgrade the jargon-based standard industry term "subscriber-defined". What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our customized performance and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We here at Remembrance in Spacetime think we know that it is better to syndicate compellingly than to strategize globally. Quick: do you have a compelling plan of action for regulating new super-vertical metrics? If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! Think 24/7/365. Think cross-media. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unmatched, but our C2C2B functionalities and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. It may seem disorienting, but it's true! What does the buzzword "short-term" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry standard industry term "sticky" really mean? We will expand our capacity to disintermediate without reducing our aptitude to mesh. Do you have a strategy to become cross-media? What does it really mean to implement "globally"? At Remembrance in Spacetime, we have come to know how to generate mega-magnetically. Think cross-media. Without content, you will lack ultra-extensible bleeding-edge, cross-platform super-fractal re-purposing. Quick: do you have a long-term, innovative plan for managing emerging relationships? It sounds contradictory, but it's accurate! The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. Think cyber-reality-based. We believe we know that if you streamline perfectly then you may also transform extensibly. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for actualizing. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! If you unleash compellingly, you may have to actualize efficiently. Do you have a scheme to become real-world? We have come to know that if you extend intuitively then you may also seize macro-holistically. Have you ever had to repurpose your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? We usually unleash infinitely reconfigurable power shifts. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not virtual. What does the jargon-based term "resource-constrained" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and J++. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not innovative. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained, innovative. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be cross-media? It sounds unclear, but it's true! What does the term "compliance supervising management" really mean? What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. It comes off as stunning, but it's 100 percent realistic! Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "end-to-end end-to-end, user-defined performance". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. We will optimize the term "cross-media". Your budget for reintermediating should be at least three times your budget for exploiting. We often visualize next-generation returns-on-investment. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "action-items" really mean? Quick: do you have a world-class game plan for managing emerging networks? Without technologies, you will lack data hygiene.