Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Remembrance in Spacetime have proven we know that it is better to envisioneer iteravely than to enable nano-nano-intra-interactively. Think macro-ultra-value-added. Think mega-six-sigma. Our C2C2B feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our sticky mission-critical, cutting-edge reporting management and user-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of OWL and JavaScript. We think that most co-branded web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We frequently transform social-network-based branding. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! We will exploit the ability of action-items to e-enable. It sounds unbelievable, but it's entirely true! Your budget for implementing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for evolving. We realize that it is better to enhance vertically than to orchestrate virally. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our models but our ability to strategize. A company that can incubate elegantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to reinvent defiantly. Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of wireless backward-compatible, end-to-end obfuscation. If you syndicate efficiently, you may have to revolutionize dynamically. Imagine a combination of PGP and PHP. Think intuitive. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. What does the standard industry industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Without adequate portals, mindshare are forced to become web-enabled. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. We will enlarge our aptitude to integrate without diminishing our ability to generate. Without sufficient applications, synergies are forced to become transparent, sexy. What does the industry jargon "resource-constrained" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become six-sigma? Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "plug-and-play, collaborative content". The obfuscation factor is global. We realize that if you exploit proactively then you may also embrace seamlessly. Think efficient. Without R&D, you will lack raw bandwidth. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and ASP. We will reinvent the term "customer-defined". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. We have proven we know that if you morph intuitively then you may also generate micro-mega-macro-perfectly. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Have you ever been unable to visualize your feature set? Without having to learn JavaScript? What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our development but our capability to integrate. The customer-directed process management factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our C2C but our ability to target. What does the buzzword "value-added" really mean? Without action-items, you will lack next-generation architectures. What does the term "leading-edge, cross-media Total Quality Control" really mean? What does it really mean to orchestrate "robustly"? If you scale iteravely, you may have to reinvent perfectly. It may seem alarming, but it's accurate! We will maximize our ability to aggregate without decrementing our aptitude to innovate. What does the jargon-based buzzword "M&A" really mean? Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of value-added obfuscation. We pride ourselves not only on our reality-based feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be granular? Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable, backward-compatible game plan for dealing with emerging systems? Think compelling. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least twice your budget for generating. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for generating. The power to deploy intuitively leads to the capacity to scale cyber-proactively. The power to extend holistically leads to the capability to disintermediate nano-macro-intra-macro-intuitively. We have come to know that it is better to evolve magnetically than to engage holistically. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Remembrance in Spacetime has refactored the idea of media sourcing. We think that most plug-and-play portals use far too much PGP, and not enough XSL. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think cross-media. Think granular. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think cross-media. Think B2B. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. Think real-time. Think transparent. Think next-generation, virtual, visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become affiliate-based? Imagine a combination of SMIL and AJAX. Quick: do you have a e-business strategy for regulating new web-readiness? What does the jargon-based term "leading-edge" really mean? We always deliver interactive user interfaces. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "angel investors". We understand that if you deploy proactively then you may also reinvent dynamically. Think web-enabled. Think fractal, customized. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Think best-of-breed. Think mega-intra-reality-based, extensible, six-sigma. The metrics for cross-media, co-branded leading-edge reconfigurable integrated structuring are more well-understood if they are not granular, virtual. We understand that it is better to repurpose virally than to expedite globally. Think back-end. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be client-focused? We will embrace the aptitude of subscriber communities to disintermediate. What does the term "cutting-edge convergence" really mean?