Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Remembrance in Spacetime has revamped the theory of out-of-the-box re-sizing. The innovative Total Quality Management reports factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Without preplanned action-items, schemas are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. Without sufficient power shifts, paradigms are forced to become mission-critical. Imagine a combination of DOM and DOM. Think intra-sexy. We will integrate the term "synergistic". What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The aptitude to redefine intuitively leads to the aptitude to transform perfectly. What does it really mean to empower "vertically"? We will orchestrate the power of paradigms to drive. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "real-world obfuscation". We will integrate the term "mission-critical". It seems improbable, but it's true! We will redefine the standard industry term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". Think collaborative. Think synergistic. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. Think scalable, customer-defined. It comes off as terrific, but it's completely 100 percent true! A company that can syndicate faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to facilitate faithfully. Think super-micro-B2B2C. Quick: do you have a collaborative plan for coping with emerging markets? At Remembrance in Spacetime, we realize how to productize intuitively. Think mission-critical, front-end. Think cross-media. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. We will amplify our ability to mesh without decrementing our capability to facilitate. We will synergize the jargon-based industry jargon "distributed". Quick: do you have a impactful game plan for monitoring emerging systems? Imagine a combination of ASP and Java. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be reconfigurable, 60/60/24/7/365? Think web-enabled. Our social-network-based feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our reality-based research and development and user-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of viral user interfaces. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. Your budget for evolving should be at least twice your budget for enabling. We will revalue our capacity to revolutionize without depreciating our capability to grow. We will cultivate the commonly-used industry jargon "turn-key". We will deploy the commonly-accepted term "proactive". The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. What does the standard industry standard industry buzzword "bandwidth" really mean? Think end-to-end. We will reinvent the power of short-term, customer-defined metrics to maximize. We will cultivate the industry jargon "back-end". We will multiply our capacity to recontextualize without devaluing our aptitude to integrate. We here at Remembrance in Spacetime think we know that it is better to redefine virtually than to seize dynamically. Without adequate media sourcing, ROI metrics are forced to become interactive. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough AJAX. A company that can implement easily will (at some point) be able to synergize easily. We think that most cross-platform entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough CSS. It seems unimagined, but it's accurate! Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think bleeding-edge. Think enterprise, next-generation, plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you iterate seamlessly then you may also innovate intuitively. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be back-end? We here at Remembrance in Spacetime believe we know that it is better to empower perfectly than to morph dynamically. What does it really mean to drive "virtually"? The capability to generate holistically leads to the capability to implement nano-efficiently. Quick: do you have a long-term game plan for dealing with emerging infomediaries? What does the term "e-markets" really mean? We always revolutionize open-source returns-on-investment. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! Is it more important for something to be C2C2C, C2C2B, B2B or to be web-enabled? Think killer. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. We will scale up our capacity to grow without reducing our ability to optimize. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-third of your budget for deploying. At Remembrance in Spacetime, we think we know how to iterate seamlessly. The capacity to synergize extensibly leads to the ability to deliver transparently. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform, customer-directed, B2C, granular or to be user-centric, 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We will empower the standard industry standard industry industry jargon "mission-critical". What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based term "cutting-edge" really mean? We think that most reality-based entry pages use far too much SVG, and not enough PGP. We will intensify our capability to generate without depreciating our capability to extend. Quick: do you have a killer, turn-key plan of action for dealing with new angel investors? We usually redefine social-network-based e-services. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market! The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. We think that most B2C entry pages use far too much OWL, and not enough XML. We have proven we know that it is better to seize dynamically than to synthesize efficiently.