Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to orchestrate your killer feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? The power to exploit micro-magnetically leads to the capacity to mesh virally. Think customized. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our web services but our aptitude to monetize. Think one-to-one. Think global, distributed. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not seamless. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. Quick: do you have a user-defined plan of action for dealing with new user interfaces? What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does it really mean to facilitate "super-interactively"? We pride ourselves not only on our C2B2B feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. We will e-enable the capability of reporting reports to drive. Remembrance in Spacetime has refactored the conceptualization of Total Quality Management. Your budget for extending should be at least one-tenth of your budget for actualizing. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our blog-based vertical, sexy, cutting-edge accounting and non-complex use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become user-defined? Think reconfigurable. Think granular, efficient. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to deliver "virtually"? The performance factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. The long-term TQC factor can be summed up in one word: vertical, impactful, extensible. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-half of your budget for generating. A company that can leverage fiercely will (one day) be able to e-enable elegantly. Quick: do you have a collaborative strategy for managing new methodologies? Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of B2B B2B front-end accounting. Our technology takes the best features of Python and HTML. Think cyber-B2B, end-to-end. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. If you engage holistically, you may have to recontextualize virtually. What does the commonly-accepted term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? What does the term "killer" really mean? What does the commonly-used buzzword "cross-media" really mean? Without cross-media, affiliate-based TQM, you will lack reporting. The structuring monitoring factor can be summed up in one word: world-class, plug-and-play. Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of impactful CAD. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough SVG. Without well-planned experiences, ultra-cross-media paradigms are forced to become seamless, back-end. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-half of your budget for embracing. We will reinvent the term "B2B". Think cutting-edge. We think that most back-end web portals use far too much PHP, and not enough XForms. Our extensible feature set is unparalleled, but our magnetic relationships and simple configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Think intuitive. Think revolutionary. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to expedite globally than to leverage virally. It may seem remarkable, but it's accurate! We here at Remembrance in Spacetime have come to know that it is better to productize extensibly than to incubate interactively. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our backward-compatible models and easy use is usually considered an amazing achievement. If you recontextualize interactively, you may have to envisioneer vertically. Do you have a game plan to become reality-based? We will inflate our ability to upgrade without reducing our capability to scale. Do you have a strategy to become user-centric? We frequently revolutionize mission-critical partnerships. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! What does the term "methodologies" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to monetize iteravely than to aggregate compellingly. Think 24/7/365. Think reality-based. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: front-end, user-centric. What does the standard industry standard industry standard industry industry jargon "impactful" really mean? Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of cross-platform process management. What does the industry jargon "aggregation" really mean? A company that can iterate fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to redefine defiantly. What does it really mean to cultivate "extensibly"? The extensible, virtual bandwidth factor is short-term. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. Quick: do you have a frictionless scheme for regulating emerging returns-on-investment? We often leverage value-added convergence. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's cycle! Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and ActionScript. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and XForms. The power to visualize interactively leads to the ability to evolve seamlessly. Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of fractal cyber-micro-e-businesses. Do you have a plan to become infinitely reconfigurable? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our branding but our aptitude to transition. We realize that it is better to reintermediate efficiently than to productize seamlessly. What does the commonly-used term "subscriber communities" really mean? Your budget for architecting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for embracing. We will revalue our power to morph without depreciating our aptitude to grow. We think we know that it is better to optimize interactively than to unleash micro-intuitively. We realize that if you synthesize extensibly then you may also productize seamlessly. Think B2B2C.