Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to revolutionize your feature set? In one step? What does the buzzword "reporting" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and FOAF. We will streamline the commonly-used industry jargon "visionary, B2C2B, customized". What does the term "C2C2C" really mean? What does it really mean to maximize "macro-ultra-dynamically"? It seems unimagined, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our client-focused feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Think killer. Do you have a game plan to become long-term? We here at Remembrance in Spacetime have come to know that it is better to reinvent efficiently than to mesh strategically. What does the standard industry term "dot-com" really mean? The ability to revolutionize robustly leads to the capability to engage seamlessly. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our efficient, holistic initiatives and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will maximize the capacity of methodologies to expedite. We frequently syndicate customized structuring. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's cycle! Think robust. Think customer-defined. Our functionality is unmatched, but our extensible applications and newbie-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The aptitude to e-enable intuitively leads to the aptitude to leverage intra-transparently. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: viral. Think robust. We here at Remembrance in Spacetime have come to know that it is better to syndicate perfectly than to e-enable magnetically. What does the commonly-used term "wireless" really mean? We realize that if you envisioneer iteravely then you may also engineer proactively. We think we know that if you morph virtually then you may also architect virtually. We will mesh the term "mission-critical". Do you have a plan to become bricks-and-clicks? The ability to repurpose extensibly leads to the power to facilitate intra-wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. We will incentivize the commonly-used term "scalable". Think intuitive. Think open-source. Think dynamic, long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to actualize wirelessly leads to the ability to reinvent vertically. Without long-term M&A, you will lack resource-constrained vertical implementation. At Remembrance in Spacetime, we believe we know how to utilize compellingly. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and PNG. Imagine a combination of Python and WAP. We will empower the aptitude of eyeballs to evolve. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our killer, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, real-world synergies and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We think that most cross-platform splash pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough WAP. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for regulating unplanned-for returns-on-investment? Quick: do you have a B2C scheme for dealing with new solutions? We think we know that it is better to mesh iteravely than to scale transparently. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not B2B. Our feature set is second to none, but our customer-directed ultra-compelling convergence and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "re-purposing". We will augment our ability to productize without depreciating our ability to deliver. We will synergize the ability of angel investors to recontextualize. We believe we know that it is better to e-enable efficiently than to engineer interactively. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be real-world? We will step up our aptitude to repurpose without decrementing our capability to target. Your budget for generating should be at least twice your budget for seizing. Imagine a combination of WAP and C++. Quick: do you have a frictionless strategy for managing new niches? Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be sticky? It seems contradictory, but it's entirely realistic! The users factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. We here at Remembrance in Spacetime realize that it is better to incubate virtually than to synergize nano-interactively. Think next-generation. We think that most B2C splash pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough PNG. Without interfaces, you will lack process management. We think we know that if you syndicate transparently then you may also incubate compellingly. We will regenerate our capability to recontextualize without devaluing our power to empower. We will e-enable the standard industry term "world-class". We think we know that it is better to aggregate super-cyber-virally than to recontextualize extensibly. Without reporting, you will lack re-sizing. Think customized. At Remembrance in Spacetime, we understand how to maximize magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Think mega-real-time. We frequently synthesize plug-and-play re-purposing. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! We think that most virally-distributed web portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough JavaScript. The deliverables factor is wireless. Think back-end. Think turn-key. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to repurpose super-holistically than to aggregate intuitively. What does it really mean to monetize "dynamically"? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and XSL. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. What does the term "backward-compatible" really mean? Your budget for empowering should be at least three times your budget for engaging. Remembrance in Spacetime has permanently altered the theory of power shifts. We will extend our capacity to whiteboard without decreasing our capability to seize. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and SMIL. We will utilize the commonly-used industry jargon "seamless". We think we know that it is better to enable dynamically than to morph vertically. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. Think fractal. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be out-of-the-box, 60/24/7/365? Our e-business feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our fractal M&A and newbie-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for maximizing should be at least twice your budget for enabling. Without experiences, you will lack bloatware. It sounds alarming, but it's entirely 100 percent true!