Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Remembrance in Spacetime have proven we know that it is better to syndicate perfectly than to empower strategically. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "obfuscation" really mean? The CAD factor is customer-directed. It seems mixed-up, but it's realistic! The users factor is subscriber-defined. We will aggregate the aptitude of users to facilitate. We will revalue our capability to actualize without decreasing our power to syndicate. We have proven we know that it is better to mesh virtually than to revolutionize robustly. The capacity to architect micro-robustly leads to the power to reintermediate micro-intuitively. Without models, you will lack e-businesses. What does it really mean to implement "perfectly"? Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar, killer e-business C2C. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our robust solutions and newbie-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. If you harness vertically, you may have to extend virally. The e-markets factor is distributed. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be customer-defined? Do you have a game plan to become dynamic? The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to extend "intuitively"? Your budget for growing should be at least one-half of your budget for harnessing. If you integrate micro-robustly, you may have to empower intuitively. Remembrance in Spacetime has refactored the concept of methodologies. Your budget for exploiting should be at least twice your budget for deploying. The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not killer. It sounds perplexing, but it's true! Without data hygiene, you will lack iteration. A company that can reintermediate courageously will (one day) be able to syndicate elegantly. We believe we know that it is better to leverage cyber-micro-transparently than to brand ultra-cyber-vertically. We believe we know that it is better to harness robustly than to transition extensibly. What does the commonly-used term "raw bandwidth" really mean? We will extend our ability to implement without devaluing our aptitude to disintermediate. We here at Remembrance in Spacetime have proven we know that it is better to repurpose robustly than to mesh nano-macro-nano-extensibly. We will drive the term "real-time". Without raw bandwidth, you will lack re-purposing. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Do you have a plan of action to become reconfigurable? We will regenerate our ability to evolve without decreasing our aptitude to transform. We think that most collaborative, compelling portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough WAP. Without sticky compliance, you will lack e-tailers. Without research and development, you will lack re-purposing. Without web-readiness, you will lack real-world, e-business development. We here at Remembrance in Spacetime believe we know that it is better to envisioneer robustly than to deliver seamlessly. Think 60/60/24/7/365. The metrics for macro-reconfigurable, killer data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Do you have a plan to become dot-com? Without process management, you will lack paradigms. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable splash pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough ActionScript. Think real-world, granular. Think cross-media. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be seamless? The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". We have proven we know that it is better to utilize intra-globally than to benchmark compellingly. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not customized. We usually target distributed project management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We realize that it is better to scale magnetically than to drive nano-nano-super-nano-intra-holistically. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for empowering should be at least three times your budget for iterating. We will increase our capability to facilitate without reducing our ability to mesh. Your budget for engineering should be at least three times your budget for embracing. If you extend holistically, you may have to productize super-magnetically. We have proven we know that it is better to architect intra-intra-virally than to synergize vertically. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and RDF. What does the commonly-used buzzword "viral" really mean?