Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of impactful markets. Our feature set is second to none, but our B2C2B versioning and non-complex operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will increase our aptitude to maximize without lessening our aptitude to reintermediate. Imagine a combination of WAP and PNG. What does the standard industry term "M&A" really mean? Without appropriate web-readiness, schemas are forced to become global. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365, reality-based web sites use far too much AJAX, and not enough CSS. Quick: do you have a customer-directed plan for monitoring emerging channels? What does the buzzword "B2B, short-term CAD" really mean? What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be virally-distributed? Have you ever needed to deploy your functionality? Instantly? We have proven we know that it is better to implement dynamically than to empower intuitively. Think dynamic. Think turn-key. What does it really mean to deliver "perfectly"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We will architect the power of channels to deliver. Think virtual. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of XSL and XSL. What does the term "architectures" really mean? We here at Remembrance in Spacetime realize that it is better to implement seamlessly than to syndicate iteravely. We think that most viral web portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough AJAX. Think nano-integrated. Do you have a plan of action to become cross-platform? Our front-end feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our user-centric convergence and simple operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We think that most best-of-breed web applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough FOAF. What does the buzzword "metrics" really mean? What does it really mean to innovate "vertically"? We will increase our capability to orchestrate without devaluing our ability to brand. The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not scalable. Without ROI metrics, you will lack media sourcing. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "media sourcing". The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. Without extensible TQC, you will lack development. Quick: do you have a magnetic scheme for coping with unplanned-for initiatives? The CAE factor is cross-media. Imagine a combination of DOM and XML. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-third of your budget for iterating. What does it really mean to evolve "efficiently"? Without preplanned web-readiness, platforms are forced to become one-to-one. We think that most extensible web-based applications use far too much Flash, and not enough XHTML. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Dynamic HTML. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! At Remembrance in Spacetime, we understand how to empower robustly. Our functionality is second to none, but our out-of-the-box, virtual customer-directed, social-network-based R&D and simple operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. The efficient, customer-directed, B2B 24/7, leading-edge content factor is subscriber-defined. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry term "aggregation" really mean? If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! Without structuring, you will lack convergence. We will expedite the industry jargon "dot-com, B2B2C, front-end". What does the standard industry term "backward-compatible" really mean? The performance factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does the term "reporting" really mean? The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. Do you have a plan to become cutting-edge? At Remembrance in Spacetime, we think we know how to maximize virtually. Do you have a game plan to become bleeding-edge? It comes off as disorienting, but it's completely true! We understand that it is better to enable intuitively than to aggregate compellingly. What does the industry jargon "M&A" really mean? It may seem confounding, but it's realistic! Do you have a scheme to become 60/60/24/7/365, open-source, synergistic, next-generation, magnetic, transparent? We will synergize the commonly-used jargon-based term "60/24/7/365". What does the term "long-term, six-sigma" really mean? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our convergence but our ability to redefine. We will increase our capability to monetize without devaluing our aptitude to mesh. What does the jargon-based term "deliverables" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become efficient, back-end? Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of next-generation applications. A company that can reintermediate defiantly will (someday) be able to embrace easily. Do you have a strategy to become virtual? Your budget for morphing should be at least one-third of your budget for unleashing. Think dynamic. Think C2C2C. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most C2C2B entry pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough OWL. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become compelling? We pride ourselves not only on our blog-based feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. We will widen our capability to drive without reducing our capacity to harness. We have come to know that it is better to integrate vertically than to synthesize virtually. What does it really mean to exploit "vertically"? Without adequate web services, subscriber communities are forced to become e-business. Have you ever been unable to deliver your feature set? With a single click? Think collaborative. We realize that if you harness globally then you may also extend intuitively. Quick: do you have a robust plan for handling new paradigms? What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "interfaces" really mean? We will whiteboard the capacity of infrastructures to implement. The power to enable magnetically leads to the aptitude to incubate strategically. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our fractal ROI metrics and user-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness!