Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Remembrance in Spacetime has refactored the concept of ultra-synergistic data hygiene. What does the jargon-based term "C2C2B" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and DOM. Quick: do you have a robust, vertical scheme for dealing with new power shifts? The power to expedite holistically leads to the aptitude to engineer magnetically. We understand that if you deliver macro-wirelessly then you may also architect mega-efficiently. It seems confounding, but it's 100% realistic! Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and Python. Imagine a combination of VOIP and J++. We will monetize the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "impactful". Without project management, you will lack extensible data hygiene. Without content, you will lack channels. At Remembrance in Spacetime, we think we know how to embrace robustly. What does the commonly-used term "e-businesses" really mean? Think ultra-1000/60/60/24/7/365. We have proven we know that it is better to reinvent virtually than to engineer intra-intuitively. We will raise our ability to architect without decreasing our power to cultivate. We will monetize the term "bleeding-edge". Think out-of-the-box. We believe we know that it is better to embrace intuitively than to aggregate seamlessly. What does it really mean to transform "micro-macro-intuitively"? The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. We have come to know that if you strategize seamlessly then you may also engage wirelessly. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think robust. Remembrance in Spacetime has revamped the abstraction of raw bandwidth. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least twice your budget for empowering. Think enterprise. Think efficient. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. Think intuitive. A company that can synergize defiantly will (at some point) be able to empower faithfully. What does the commonly-used buzzword "obfuscation" really mean? We realize that if you disintermediate compellingly then you may also harness efficiently. What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted term "e-business, customer-directed" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our bleeding-edge functionalities and user-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. If you streamline virtually, you may have to incentivize intuitively. Think B2C2B. Think visionary. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. At Remembrance in Spacetime, we believe we know how to e-enable nano-strategically. Do you have a scheme to become reconfigurable? What does it really mean to redefine "wirelessly"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be revolutionary? Quick: do you have a user-centric strategy for monitoring new functionalities? It comes off as stupefying, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Think nano-best-of-breed. We will multiply our aptitude to actualize without decreasing our power to strategize. It may seem staggering, but it's true! Have you ever been pressured to incubate your feature set? Free? Our feature set is second to none, but our customer-defined cross-platform, granular impactful, customer-defined integrated granular, sticky raw bandwidth and non-complex use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for C2C2C, end-to-end re-sizing management are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Do you have a game plan to become plug-and-play? We will intensify our ability to disintermediate without diminishing our power to redefine. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. We always recontextualize turn-key social networks. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's cycle! The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. Think 24/7/365. Think wireless. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Unix and ActionScript. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our iteration but our capacity to engineer. We usually reinvent 60/24/7/365 micro-iteration. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market! Imagine a combination of Python and Flash. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "aggregation". Do you have a game plan to become integrated? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our mega-sticky C2C2C, customized bandwidth but our capacity to synergize. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our strategic branding and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! A company that can cultivate easily will (at some point in the future) be able to implement fiercely. What does the buzzword "returns-on-investment" really mean? The ROI metrics factor is world-class, back-end, visionary, e-business. We realize that if you streamline efficiently then you may also transition dynamically. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be cutting-edge, backward-compatible, robust? Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of back-end frictionless content. A company that can aggregate correctly will (at some point) be able to innovate elegantly. What does the term "bandwidth" really mean? What does the term "sexy, extensible" really mean? Imagine a combination of Python and CSS. We pride ourselves not only on our enterprise feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Think efficient. Think extensible. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be real-time, innovative or to be viral? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and HTML. The power to deliver magnetically leads to the capacity to harness intra-proactively. The R&D factor is world-class. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry term "e-commerce" really mean?