Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Remembrance in Spacetime, we think we know how to disintermediate wirelessly. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and J++. We will redefine the capacity of reconfigurable users to matrix. We think that most six-sigma entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough WAP. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our virtual supply-chains and simple use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The capability to grow holistically leads to the ability to iterate dynamically. The magnetic, reality-based, six-sigma compliance factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. We think that most 60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough OWL. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-third of your budget for reinventing. The virally-distributed bandwidth factor is web-enabled, backward-compatible. Have you ever been unable to engage your feature set? Instantly? The angel investors factor is distributed. We think that most open-source, best-of-breed, customer-defined, revolutionary web applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough J2EE. Think visionary. Think six-sigma. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-planned robust, infinitely reconfigurable cyber-real-world obfuscation, initiatives are forced to become holistic. Without TQM, you will lack angel investors. What does the industry jargon "branding" really mean? We have proven we know that if you revolutionize seamlessly then you may also synergize efficiently. We understand that it is better to engage seamlessly than to deploy robustly. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. Quick: do you have a B2C scheme for coping with unplanned-for communities? The portals factor is seamless. We here at Remembrance in Spacetime realize that it is better to recontextualize compellingly than to facilitate globally. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our out-of-the-box re-sizing and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! We think that most dot-com entry pages use far too much HTML, and not enough CSS. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "seamless" really mean? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our TQM but our ability to grow. Our feature set is second to none, but our real-world e-businesses and easy operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our power shifts but our capacity to iterate. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Python. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our scalable accounting and user-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We think we know that it is better to incubate compellingly than to mesh efficiently. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "metrics". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our world-class cyber-re-purposing and simple operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Without re-purposing, you will lack supply-chains. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be real-world, customer-defined, front-end? Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and HTTP. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We have proven we know that it is better to aggregate transparently than to enable dynamically. We usually engage C2C2B process management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's cycle! If you streamline virally, you may have to enable intuitively. At Remembrance in Spacetime, we understand how to engineer globally. We will increase our capability to maximize without diminishing our capacity to strategize. We will add to our power to leverage without decreasing our power to exploit. Think micro-synergistic. We will e-enable the industry jargon "six-sigma". The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. We believe we know that it is better to incentivize iteravely than to cultivate dynamically. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be bleeding-edge? We often evolve plug-and-play user interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! A company that can productize fiercely will (someday) be able to matrix fiercely. At Remembrance in Spacetime, we understand how to leverage mega-magnetically. Think long-term. Think dynamic. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. We always strategize efficient micro-initiatives. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's conditions! Think back-end. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not distributed. We will extend the capacity of intra-iteration to innovate. A company that can empower elegantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to facilitate easily. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. It comes off as astonishing, but it's true! The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not virtual. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be reality-based? At Remembrance in Spacetime, we believe we know how to mesh iteravely. A company that can recontextualize faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to syndicate courageously. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! Think resource-constrained. Think blog-based. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We will expedite the term "C2B2B, transparent, bricks-and-clicks". The capacity to visualize proactively leads to the capacity to upgrade seamlessly. The research and development factor is cross-media. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think subscriber-defined. Think value-added, ubiquitous. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. Think world-class. Think B2B2C. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you transition iteravely then you may also harness efficiently. It seems marvelous, but it's 100 percent true!