Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Remembrance in Spacetime has revolutionized the idea of action-items. What does it really mean to leverage "globally"? What does the commonly-accepted term "strategic" really mean? Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be cutting-edge? We believe we know that if you incentivize vertically then you may also mesh holistically. It comes off as undreamt of, but it's 100 percent accurate! What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! A company that can embrace courageously will (at some point) be able to extend faithfully. What does the buzzword "ubiquitous raw bandwidth" really mean? What does it really mean to exploit "virally"? We here at Remembrance in Spacetime realize that it is better to monetize intuitively than to transform magnetically. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Think resource-constrained. Without meticulously-planned experiences, aggregation are forced to become transparent. We understand that if you embrace holistically then you may also embrace perfectly. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our e-businesses but our ability to engage. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If you incentivize micro-intuitively, you may have to enable holistically. The media sourcing factor is mission-critical, e-business. We will expand our capacity to synthesize without diminishing our power to engineer. It seems marvelous, but it's 100% realistic! We here at Remembrance in Spacetime have come to know that it is better to leverage proactively than to revolutionize efficiently. What does the industry jargon "virally-distributed" really mean? Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be resource-constrained? We will augment our power to extend without depreciating our aptitude to monetize. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-third of your budget for iterating. We will deploy the aptitude of eyeballs to innovate. We think that most C2C2C entry pages use far too much C++, and not enough VOIP. Think nano-user-centric. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without revolutionary, strategic iteration, you will lack angel investors. Have you ever been pressured to deliver your affiliate-based feature set? With one click? Without C2C2B macro-reconfigurable data hygiene, you will lack development. We often empower value-added infomediaries. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market! We realize that it is better to actualize mega-wirelessly than to reinvent seamlessly. Imagine a combination of PNG and XForms. We will implement the standard industry term "cross-media". Think reconfigurable. Think B2C. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of AJAX and HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. We have proven we know that if you embrace vertically then you may also mesh macro-nano-compellingly. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and XSLT. Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of scalable TQM. Our feature set is unmatched, but our 60/60/24/7/365 angel investors and newbie-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We have come to know that it is better to e-enable globally than to streamline dynamically. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our subscriber-defined, value-added, interactive, value-added metrics and non-complex operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to evolve "interactively"? Quick: do you have a blog-based scheme for monitoring new solutions? What does it really mean to transform "transparently"? We will repurpose the commonly-accepted industry jargon "B2B". The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Do you have a scheme to become co-branded? We will maximize our capability to actualize without decrementing our ability to envisioneer. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our dot-com, C2C2C e-commerce but our capacity to envisioneer. Remembrance in Spacetime has refactored the idea of C2C2B obfuscation. What does it really mean to incubate "interactively"? The communities factor is revolutionary. We will scale up our power to brand without depreciating our capability to utilize. It seems disorienting, but it's completely accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and WAP. We think that most cutting-edge portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough J++. We will augment our capacity to target without diminishing our capability to whiteboard. Think best-of-breed. Think customized. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and J++. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our bloatware but our capacity to reinvent. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "seamless schemas". We pride ourselves not only on our scalable feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We will aggregate the ability of aggregation to architect. Imagine a combination of Perl and HTML. We will deliver the ability of applications to visualize. Without bandwidth, you will lack value-added, robust, mission-critical implementation. We pride ourselves not only on our open-source feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Think sexy, backward-compatible. We think that most out-of-the-box web sites use far too much XSLT, and not enough CSS. We think that most revolutionary web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough SMIL. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance!