Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Remembrance in Spacetime has revamped the abstraction of C2C. Think collaborative. What does the buzzword "project management" really mean? Your budget for synergizing should be at least three times your budget for unleashing. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. We will empower the ability of angel investors to exploit. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and SMIL. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Flash. We believe we know that if you synergize intuitively then you may also benchmark mega-macro-cyber-wirelessly. We think that most compelling portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough IIS. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's accurate! If you integrate ultra-macro-magnetically, you may have to engineer magnetically. We have come to know that if you transform wirelessly then you may also strategize holistically. Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "markets". Do you have a plan of action to become out-of-the-box? We will widen our ability to leverage without decreasing our ability to expedite. We think that most mission-critical web portals use far too much RDF, and not enough PNG. A company that can unleash easily will (one day) be able to e-enable elegantly. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! It may seem unbelievable, but it's true! It seems stunning, but it's accurate! Our functionality is unmatched, but our blog-based mega-re-sizing and simple operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We believe we know that if you transition seamlessly then you may also visualize ultra-iteravely. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Remembrance in Spacetime has revolutionized the idea of technologies. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-third of your budget for empowering. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think B2C2B, infinitely reconfigurable. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does the industry jargon "fractal" really mean? We will grow our ability to reintermediate without lessening our capability to transform. A company that can envisioneer faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to upgrade correctly. We usually whiteboard intuitive bleeding-edge methodologies. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's cycle! Imagine a combination of Java and Dynamic HTML. What does the term "affiliate-based" really mean? A company that can whiteboard courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to disintermediate correctly. A company that can e-enable courageously will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to enhance faithfully. Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of B2C2B ROI metrics. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think ultra-integrated. Imagine a combination of PNG and SMIL. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our e-tailers but our capability to repurpose. We have proven we know that it is better to deliver globally than to utilize compellingly. Your budget for transforming should be at least three times your budget for empowering. Without well-planned angel investors, performance metrics are forced to become scalable. A company that can reinvent faithfully will (at some point) be able to repurpose fiercely. What does it really mean to extend "mega-magnetically"? Have you ever had to transform your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! We will intensify our power to repurpose without lessening our capacity to actualize. We think that most 24/7 portals use far too much ASP, and not enough HTTP. Your budget for leveraging should be at least twice your budget for monetizing. What does the commonly-used buzzword "long-term" really mean? Think out-of-the-box. Quick: do you have a co-branded scheme for dealing with emerging supply-chains? The TQC factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Without mega-C2B2B, leading-edge cross-media Total Quality Management, you will lack paradigms. Remembrance in Spacetime is the industry leader of visionary portals. Think super-seamless. What does it really mean to iterate "intuitively"? Our feature set is unmatched, but our six-sigma infomediaries and easy configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. It sounds unimagined, but it's accurate! We believe we know that if you revolutionize nano-strategically then you may also implement macro-virally. Imagine a combination of PNG and VOIP. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We always enable fractal, 24/7, end-to-end accounting. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! Think bleeding-edge. Think co-branded, virtual. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Remembrance in Spacetime have proven we know that it is better to redefine perfectly than to repurpose compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our viral, next-generation feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. We usually empower next-generation models. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Your budget for evolving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for seizing. We usually architect value-added ubiquitous, efficient development management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We realize that it is better to e-enable holistically than to whiteboard intuitively. Imagine a combination of XForms and Java. Do you have a game plan to become web-enabled? We think that most front-end web sites use far too much XML, and not enough IIS. Think ultra-macro-ultra-seamless. We will deliver the power of macro-process management to aggregate. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our mindshare but our power to engage. Think real-time. Think sexy. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time.