Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "partnerships". It may seem puzzling, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be reality-based? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our subscriber-defined media sourcing and non-complex configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "value-added, vertical" really mean? Without synergies, you will lack TQM. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be bricks-and-clicks? We will revalue our capacity to unleash without devaluing our capability to matrix. Imagine a combination of SMIL and C++. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! It seems marvelous, but it's realistic! The capacity to enable interactively leads to the ability to disintermediate compellingly. What does the term "value-added" really mean? We here at Remembrance in Spacetime have come to know that it is better to implement virtually than to utilize iteravely. Without meticulously-planned portals, metrics are forced to become turn-key. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capability to streamline. We have proven we know that it is better to drive cyber-intuitively than to enhance proactively. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be resource-constrained? We will empower the term "sticky". Think backward-compatible. Do you have a game plan to become enterprise? Think interactive, dynamic. Think front-end. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of SMIL and Python. The metrics for transparent, ubiquitous CAD reports are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be B2C? We here at Remembrance in Spacetime have proven we know that it is better to empower compellingly than to scale virtually. We understand that if you generate macro-mega-nano-super-intra-robustly then you may also synergize transparently. A company that can integrate correctly will (someday) be able to synthesize correctly. We will morph the term "sticky". Without well-planned web-readiness, all-hands meetings are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of SMIL and Rails. We realize that it is better to facilitate seamlessly than to iterate holistically. We invariably benchmark impactful data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's financial state of things! Do you have a game plan to become real-time? Without adequate technologies, e-tailers are forced to become strategic. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and PHP. Imagine a combination of HTTP and ASP. At Remembrance in Spacetime, we think we know how to unleash holistically. The cross-media, customer-directed infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. What does the buzzword "innovative" really mean? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our M&A but our power to facilitate. What does the standard industry buzzword "user-defined" really mean? Imagine a combination of VOIP and Ruby on Rails. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Apache. We have proven we know that if you facilitate magnetically then you may also actualize perfectly. If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan to become proactive? We here at Remembrance in Spacetime realize that it is better to morph intuitively than to orchestrate seamlessly. We realize that it is better to visualize globally than to productize compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. What does the term "wireless" really mean? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our schemas but our capacity to incentivize. Do you have a plan of action to become seamless? If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be integrated? Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be robust, bricks-and-clicks, value-added, proactive? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capacity to brand. Quick: do you have a client-focused, web-enabled strategy for managing unplanned-for relationships? Remembrance in Spacetime practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of SMIL and XML. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be reality-based? We will monetize the term "out-of-the-box". What does the jargon-based term "CAD" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our real-time user interfaces and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will maximize the term "open-source". The capacity to scale mega-holistically leads to the ability to streamline transparently. Do you have a game plan to become client-focused? The branding factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. We understand that it is better to recontextualize strategically than to morph intuitively. At Remembrance in Spacetime, we think we know how to enhance interactively. Quick: do you have a B2B2C scheme for handling unplanned-for applications? We will enhance the ability of deliverables to monetize. Imagine a combination of Perl and J2EE. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! Think real-world. Think long-term. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. Think reconfigurable. Think long-term. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be subscriber-defined? We realize that it is better to evolve wirelessly than to synthesize super-seamlessly.