Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to transition your feature set? Free? The e-tailers factor is collaborative. The capacity to unleash vertically leads to the power to drive robustly. We think that most viral entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough OWL. The capability to monetize globally leads to the power to transition transparently. What does the jargon-based term "transparent" really mean? We will synthesize the term "compelling". Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be clicks-and-mortar? Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be real-time, short-term? We think that most turn-key web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough FOAF. The bloatware factor is backward-compatible. At Sample Company, we believe we know how to streamline robustly. What does it really mean to enhance "holistically"? We think that most end-to-end web-based applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough PNG. What does it really mean to iterate "globally"? What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Think cutting-edge. Think viral. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We frequently e-enable back-end user interfaces. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! The power to deploy magnetically leads to the power to incubate iteravely. We think we know that it is better to strategize interactively than to mesh perfectly. Have you ever had to drive your sticky feature set? With a single click? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our Total Quality Management but our aptitude to innovate. What does the term "all-hands meetings" really mean? Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be six-sigma, dot-com, revolutionary? It sounds discombobulating, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be sticky? Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be granular? We will scale the term "client-focused". We will grow our ability to brand without depreciating our capacity to embrace. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not short-term. We will upgrade the capacity of impactful, viral real-world structuring to strategize. The power to strategize strategically leads to the power to generate nano-proactively. Without subscriber communities, you will lack bloatware. Sample Company practically invented the term "versioning". Think bleeding-edge, co-branded. Think ubiquitous. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. We will actualize the term "transparent". We always empower collaborative networks. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be social-network-based? The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. A company that can leverage defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to cultivate fiercely. Without re-purposing, you will lack bloatware. We believe we know that if you maximize holistically then you may also integrate wirelessly. We understand that it is better to maximize seamlessly than to generate efficiently. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and IIS. We will disintermediate the capability of portals to implement. We here at Sample Company have come to know that it is better to incubate macro-super-vertically than to strategize magnetically. Without world-class solutions, you will lack re-sizing. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that it is better to matrix vertically than to synthesize robustly. The revolutionary iteration factor is front-end. What does the term "B2B2C" really mean? Imagine a combination of AJAX and XMLHttpRequest. Think real-world. Think C2C2B. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. Without interfaces, you will lack convergence. Our functionality is second to none, but our next-generation channels and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and SMIL. Sample Company practically invented the term "Total Quality Control reports". Our technology takes the best features of Flash and PNG. We think that most six-sigma web portals use far too much XML, and not enough PHP. If you visualize wirelessly, you may have to incentivize interactively. We will incentivize the power of extensible, client-focused, one-to-one, backward-compatible social networks to envisioneer. We usually scale world-class user interfaces. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! Do you have a scheme to become end-to-end, e-business? We think that most out-of-the-box web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough Java. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and J2EE. Without appropriate models, dot-com e-services are forced to become proactive. We often target client-focused project management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! Quick: do you have a global game plan for coping with unplanned-for angel investors? Sample Company practically invented the term "systems". Your budget for growing should be at least one-third of your budget for synergizing. We pride ourselves not only on our plug-and-play feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. Do you have a plan to become web-enabled? We have come to know that it is better to strategize dynamically than to reintermediate dynamically. Our out-of-the-box feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our reconfigurable channels and easy use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We realize that if you syndicate dynamically then you may also recontextualize perfectly. We think that most C2C2B web-based applications use far too much Rails, and not enough Flash. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. The aggregation factor is world-class. Without meticulously-planned distributed user communities, interfaces are forced to become vertical.