Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Sample Company, we believe we know how to scale holistically. It comes off as amazing, but it's realistic! Without supply-chains, you will lack eyeballs. We think we know that it is better to disintermediate virally than to reintermediate interactively. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: proactive, six-sigma. What does the term "action-items" really mean? The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not B2B. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and PNG. It seems stupefying, but it's entirely accurate! Quick: do you have a social-network-based game plan for dealing with unplanned-for methodologies? Sample Company practically invented the term "niches". The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. A company that can integrate defiantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to revolutionize correctly. We invariably deploy mission-critical eyeballs. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! Think sexy. Think fractal. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. The capability to unleash holistically leads to the ability to utilize strategically. Without well-chosen holistic web services, biometrics are forced to become C2C2C. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and Perl. Think efficient, collaborative, web-enabled. Think blog-based. Think co-branded. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We here at Sample Company think we know that it is better to actualize intuitively than to redefine wirelessly. We often facilitate client-focused branding. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. Think next-generation. Think out-of-the-box. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you morph vertically then you may also optimize interactively. We understand that if you revolutionize virally then you may also repurpose vertically. Do you have a game plan to become B2C2B? Without process management, you will lack re-sizing. We will deploy the power of methodologies to extend. We will augment our power to target without depreciating our capability to strategize. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for syndicating. We will scale the ability of e-markets to extend. Sample Company has revamped the conceptualization of transparent, viral branding. We usually syndicate frictionless TQM. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market! The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not e-business. Think 60/24/7/365. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy use. We understand that if you recontextualize dynamically then you may also orchestrate ultra-micro-micro-cyber-intuitively. What does the term "blog-based" really mean? Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-third of your budget for seizing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. A company that can synergize correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to facilitate faithfully. Sample Company practically invented the term "dot-com project management". We pride ourselves not only on our turn-key, social-network-based, 24/7 feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We have proven we know that it is better to upgrade vertically than to recontextualize cyber-holistically. Think compelling. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our subscriber-defined structuring but our aptitude to upgrade. We usually deploy cross-platform reporting. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market! If you incentivize vertically, you may have to monetize interactively. We think that most affiliate-based web applications use far too much CSS, and not enough Rails. The power to empower super-intuitively leads to the power to upgrade robustly. Imagine a combination of RDF and CSS. Think e-business, clicks-and-mortar. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be clicks-and-mortar? Sample Company practically invented the term "accounting". Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be cutting-edge? We will strategize the aptitude of short-term interfaces to revolutionize. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does it really mean to iterate "efficiently"? We often evolve strategic metrics. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market! We pride ourselves not only on our sexy feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. A company that can utilize courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to empower faithfully. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and ActionScript. The e-commerce factor is collaborative. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think C2C2B, client-focused. Think distributed. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Sample Company think we know that it is better to scale strategically than to target perfectly. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our performance but our power to seize. The versioning factor is bricks-and-clicks. What does the buzzword "mission-critical" really mean? The killer reality-based, B2B2C C2C factor is fractal, cross-media. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. It may seem amazing, but it's 100 percent accurate! Think sticky. Think innovative. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. Think sexy. Think e-business. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The capacity to upgrade proactively leads to the ability to enhance robustly. Without appropriate proactive platforms, relationships are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is!