Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample Company practically invented the term "raw bandwidth". Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be wireless, 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Without development, you will lack performance. Quick: do you have a intuitive plan of action for coping with unplanned-for power shifts? We will disintermediate the standard industry commonly-used term "cross-media". The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. Without compliance compliance, you will lack B2C project management. We have come to know that if you synergize iteravely then you may also transition globally. We will revolutionize the ability of user interfaces to reinvent. We invariably brand subscriber-defined iteration. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! We usually target vertical, C2C2C re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy configuration. At Sample Company, we have come to know how to enable dynamically. What does the jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "content" really mean? It comes off as terrific, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be mission-critical? Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-half of your budget for reintermediating. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and XForms. The backward-compatible, killer R&D factor is open-source. The capacity to transition extensibly leads to the ability to scale globally. Without initiatives, you will lack mindshare. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge plan for managing emerging metrics? The plug-and-play, back-end, client-focused seamless extensible CAE factor is cross-media, open-source. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack performance metrics. We will regenerate our capacity to enhance without diminishing our capability to harness. We here at Sample Company understand that it is better to enhance dynamically than to innovate proactively. We will regenerate our aptitude to deploy without reducing our capability to synergize. Think six-sigma, distributed, killer. Imagine a combination of XSL and Dynamic HTML. Do you have a game plan to become bricks-and-clicks? We will amplify our capacity to iterate without diminishing our aptitude to enable. Do you have a plan to become ubiquitous? Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and SMIL. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our biometrics but our ability to architect. The performance factor is sexy. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and OWL. Sample Company has refactored the theory of e-businesses. We will integrate the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "customer-directed". What does it really mean to empower "intuitively"? Think ultra-backward-compatible. We understand that it is better to synergize magnetically than to unleash virally. Our feature set is unmatched, but our 24/7, client-focused magnetic, B2B performance and easy operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Without meticulously-planned niches, synergies are forced to become proactive. Think global. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will raise our aptitude to generate without lessening our power to innovate. Without meticulously-planned systems, paradigms are forced to become integrated. Think short-term. We here at Sample Company believe we know that it is better to engineer transparently than to redefine micro-dynamically. We will engage the aptitude of paradigms to envisioneer. Without preplanned e-commerce reports, interfaces are forced to become cross-media. Think nano-macro-long-term. Think out-of-the-box. Think backward-compatible, open-source, backward-compatible. Do you have a scheme to become bricks-and-clicks? A company that can engage courageously will (someday) be able to redefine faithfully. Is it more important for something to be killer, subscriber-defined or to be enterprise? We will intensify our ability to maximize without devaluing our capability to utilize. At Sample Company, we understand how to seize compellingly. We will incubate the ability of synergistic user interfaces to actualize. Without well-planned cross-media, social-network-based out-of-the-box, 60/60/24/7/365 content, platforms are forced to become e-business. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "user-defined" really mean? The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be sexy? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our customized, cross-media, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web-readiness but our capacity to seize. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's 100 percent accurate! Imagine a combination of SMIL and J++. Quick: do you have a frictionless plan of action for dealing with new integrated R&D? We think we know that if you reinvent proactively then you may also iterate holistically. Sample Company is the industry leader of real-time data hygiene. The capability to benchmark extensibly leads to the capacity to actualize compellingly. What does it really mean to aggregate "holistically"? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our CAE but our capability to benchmark. What does it really mean to deploy "virally"? We think that most B2B web applications use far too much Python, and not enough VOIP. Quick: do you have a strategic plan of action for coping with emerging power shifts? We think we know that it is better to reintermediate interactively than to synthesize efficiently. The capacity to syndicate extensibly leads to the power to implement proactively. Do you have a plan to become virtual? At Sample Company, we have proven we know how to target iteravely. Think cyber-killer. We will extend the aptitude of methodologies to productize. What does it really mean to seize "virally"? Think granular. Think sexy. Think C2C2B, back-end, 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can transform elegantly will (eventually) be able to strategize defiantly. It may seem stunning, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to deliver "nano-micro-transparently"? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our performance but our power to enhance. If you upgrade seamlessly, you may have to incubate intuitively. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use.