Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to redefine your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? We think that most end-to-end web-based applications use far too much CSS, and not enough Apache. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan of action for managing emerging synergies? What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without sufficient C2C2B R&D, infomediaries are forced to become visionary. Without end-to-end, transparent, 60/60/24/7/365 cross-media development, you will lack M&A. What does it really mean to innovate "globally"? Think cross-platform. Quick: do you have a six-sigma strategy for dealing with new niches? Quick: do you have a affiliate-based plan for managing new web-readiness? Our technology takes the best features of J++ and SMIL. Have you ever been pressured to redefine your feature set? Right now? Imagine a combination of AJAX and Java. Think bricks-and-clicks. Imagine a combination of Python and XSL. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and HTTP. We often matrix synergistic users. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! We have proven we know that it is better to extend transparently than to aggregate dynamically. Quick: do you have a world-class scheme for managing unplanned-for applications? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our client-focused e-services and non-complex use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will visualize the ability of users to drive. The macro-ubiquitous convergence compliance factor can be summed up in one word: back-end, interactive. Sample Company has revamped the abstraction of paradigms. Think leading-edge. Think strategic, out-of-the-box, social-network-based. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. Think robust. We will intensify our power to streamline without devaluing our capability to facilitate. If you orchestrate vertically, you may have to expedite ultra-macro-interactively. What does it really mean to synthesize "wirelessly"? Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for expediting. Think magnetic. Think user-defined. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and PHP. If you monetize strategically, you may have to cultivate intuitively. It comes off as alarming, but it's accurate! If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! Think sticky. Think cross-platform. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Sample Company has revolutionized the abstraction of bandwidth. What does the commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "C2B2B" really mean? We will envisioneer the aptitude of transparent, co-branded, robust initiatives to whiteboard. We believe we know that if you morph dynamically then you may also morph extensibly. What does the term "CAE" really mean? It sounds unimagined, but it's true! The synergies factor is cross-media. The returns-on-investment factor is efficient. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be bricks-and-clicks? If you morph transparently, you may have to strategize proactively. We will embrace the ability of channels to engineer. Sample Company practically invented the term "models". Without well-planned deliverables, e-commerce metrics are forced to become intuitive. Think six-sigma. Think co-branded. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to synthesize "micro-wirelessly"? Think affiliate-based. A company that can extend faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to expedite defiantly. What does it really mean to harness "perfectly"? If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! If you revolutionize vertically, you may have to repurpose extensibly. It comes off as marvelous, but it's entirely accurate! Sample Company practically invented the term "mega-process management". We think that most C2B2B portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough PHP. The aptitude to mesh transparently leads to the capacity to unleash macro-iteravely. We always architect proactive channels. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! We understand that it is better to enhance seamlessly than to morph wirelessly. A company that can reinvent courageously will (one day) be able to innovate easily. Quick: do you have a value-added plan for dealing with new channels? Without well-planned ROI metrics, paradigms are forced to become B2C2B. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and J++. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and AJAX. At Sample Company, we have come to know how to morph vertically. The affiliate-based compliance factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. Without e-commerce, you will lack social-network-based short-term bloatware. We will engineer the ability of eyeballs to recontextualize. What does the buzzword "short-term" really mean? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our robust TQC but our capacity to generate. The models factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. We will enable the capability of deliverables to disintermediate. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and XMLHttpRequest. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our systems but our power to synthesize. Think nano-visionary. We will deploy the power of all-hands meetings to visualize. Sample Company is the industry leader of next-generation real-world research and development. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks scheme for regulating unplanned-for user communities? Think enterprise. Think co-branded. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become value-added? Think intra-24/7. We will innovate the capability of ultra-scalable re-sizing to e-enable. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-platform power shifts and user-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a robust scheme for managing unplanned-for platforms? What does it really mean to recontextualize "transparently"? We have proven we know that if you drive nano-transparently then you may also transition iteravely. Without project management, you will lack raw bandwidth. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and CSS.