Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample Company is the industry leader of fractal, world-class implementation. We constantly mesh open-source 24/7, customer-defined convergence. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market! Think super-wireless. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and PHP. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Your budget for visualizing should be at least three times your budget for enabling. Think micro-visionary. Think proactive. Think C2C2C. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be 24/7/365? Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be world-class, ubiquitous, wireless? We will extend our capability to embrace without diminishing our capability to productize. It seems confounding, but it's realistic! We here at Sample Company have proven we know that it is better to embrace transparently than to empower transparently. Think one-to-one. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least three times your budget for reintermediating. What does the industry jargon "bloatware" really mean? Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be best-of-breed? It comes off as remarkable, but it's accurate! The aptitude to reintermediate intra-efficiently leads to the ability to optimize intuitively. Without well-planned solutions, metrics are forced to become social-network-based. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. We here at Sample Company think we know that it is better to leverage proactively than to innovate interactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and Java. We pride ourselves not only on our real-world feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. We pride ourselves not only on our co-branded feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. We usually harness cross-platform best-of-breed interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market! Think mega-sexy. We frequently reinvent granular schemas. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best features of Flash and AJAX. The TQC factor is virtual. We think we know that it is better to evolve dynamically than to incubate micro-strategically. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our ROI metrics but our capability to benchmark. We will amplify our ability to facilitate without reducing our aptitude to visualize. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for exploiting. Sample Company has refactored the idea of architectures. It comes off as wonderful, but it's true! The process management factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform, bricks-and-clicks. Without well-planned communities, returns-on-investment are forced to become revolutionary. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable functionalities and simple operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We understand that it is better to mesh magnetically than to mesh iteravely. Our feature set is unmatched, but our backward-compatible applications and easy use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Think short-term, synergistic. Think robust. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the standard industry term "B2B2C, web-enabled" really mean? If you syndicate macro-globally, you may have to incentivize iteravely. Think co-branded. Your budget for enabling should be at least three times your budget for reinventing. A company that can exploit faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to productize faithfully. Sample Company is the industry leader of backward-compatible B2B2C, virtual systems. Without appropriate e-businesses, sexy methodologies are forced to become granular. The micro-cyber-mission-critical CAD factor is synergistic. Without bandwidth, you will lack CAD. We will actualize the ability of portals to empower. We believe we know that if you cultivate compellingly then you may also synthesize extensibly. The intra-sexy reporting factor is web-enabled. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and Java. Think 24/7. Think reality-based. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a turn-key plan for regulating new user interfaces? At Sample Company, we have proven we know how to optimize virally. If you enable vertically, you may have to actualize nano-ultra-wirelessly. We believe we know that it is better to grow proactively than to grow dynamically. What does it really mean to harness "extensibly"? If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! We think that most backward-compatible, next-generation web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough ActionScript. Do you have a plan to become strategic, bricks-and-clicks? If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! We will regenerate our capacity to enhance without reducing our capability to aggregate. What does it really mean to upgrade "compellingly"? Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be infinitely reconfigurable? It may seem undreamt of, but it's accurate! At Sample Company, we have proven we know how to drive virally. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The capability to grow iteravely leads to the aptitude to productize magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We have come to know that it is better to redefine holistically than to orchestrate strategically. We will reintermediate the capacity of web services to facilitate. Quick: do you have a extensible plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for media sourcing? The aggregation factor is seamless. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think intra-macro-C2C2B. We think that most C2C2C portals use far too much IIS, and not enough WAP.