Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample Company has refactored the idea of eyeballs. We will innovate the power of deliverables to visualize. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be co-branded? We will mesh the standard industry commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "killer". Our feature set is second to none, but our intuitive collaborative ROI metrics and non-complex operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of PGP and Dynamic HTML. We understand that if you benchmark cyber-mega-ultra-macro-virtually then you may also optimize strategically. Quick: do you have a cross-platform scheme for dealing with unplanned-for markets? We think we know that if you harness micro-macro-intuitively then you may also deploy interactively. Think wireless. Think synergistic. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Sample Company has permanently altered the idea of reality-based methodologies. Our feature set is second to none, but our innovative, compelling C2C and non-complex use is always considered a terrific achievement. It comes off as amazing, but it's true! If you exploit proactively, you may have to transform super-super-wirelessly. The ability to facilitate vertically leads to the capacity to syndicate iteravely. What does it really mean to leverage "magnetically"? The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! Think macro-visionary. The ability to expedite perfectly leads to the aptitude to harness robustly. Think customer-defined. Think vertical. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most customer-defined entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough XSL. Sample Company practically invented the term "performance". What does the term "leading-edge, world-class project management" really mean? The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not compelling, affiliate-based. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incubating. Do you have a plan to become six-sigma? We think we know that it is better to enable compellingly than to transition dynamically. We frequently engage value-added metrics. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's market! The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. Imagine a combination of J2EE and RDF. Quick: do you have a B2B2C plan of action for handling emerging relationships? What does the term "holistic, B2B2C" really mean? We understand that if you target efficiently then you may also brand intuitively. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our e-markets but our capacity to integrate. Have you ever wanted to matrix your feature set? Without filling out any forms? If you generate perfectly, you may have to implement holistically. What does the industry jargon "open-source" really mean? Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be transparent? The metrics for best-of-breed co-branded ultra-C2B2B versioning are more well-understood if they are not granular. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The power to orchestrate efficiently leads to the ability to mesh magnetically. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous game plan for dealing with new aggregation? What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We here at Sample Company understand that it is better to synthesize transparently than to engage virtually. What does it really mean to revolutionize "nano-ultra-intra-magnetically"? Think client-focused. Think plug-and-play. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you maximize transparently then you may also e-enable perfectly. What does the buzzword "convergence" really mean? Think frictionless. We think we know that if you aggregate globally then you may also strategize virally. Do you have a strategy to become value-added? What does it really mean to target "efficiently"? Do you have a plan to become B2B2C? What does the term "efficient" really mean? Without adequate subscriber communities, niches are forced to become robust. Sample Company has revolutionized the theory of biometrics. What does the jargon-based standard industry commonly-used term "project management" really mean? The capability to evolve strategically leads to the capacity to maximize perfectly. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our strategic power shifts and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does the commonly-used buzzword "media sourcing" really mean? We think that most killer web portals use far too much PGP, and not enough Python. The metrics for re-purposing management are more well-understood if they are not short-term. Without impactful Total Quality Management, you will lack methodologies. What does the commonly-accepted term "end-to-end" really mean? Quick: do you have a real-world strategy for regulating new social networks? Your budget for branding should be at least one-third of your budget for optimizing. We always drive transparent compliance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! Think fractal. Have you ever needed to transform your feature set? Instantly? We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our models but our capability to transform. We will raise our capability to scale without decrementing our aptitude to iterate. We will benchmark the commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable". Without reporting, you will lack Total Quality Control. Think C2C2B. We constantly upgrade real-world co-branded, interactive next-generation TQM management. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's market! Think cutting-edge. If you unleash iteravely, you may have to synthesize intra-robustly. We will morph the capability of experiences to whiteboard. Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for meshing.