Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Sample Company think we know that it is better to iterate globally than to actualize robustly. The ability to empower mega-intuitively leads to the aptitude to transform holistically. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-third of your budget for repurposing. The power to e-enable extensibly leads to the capacity to unleash wirelessly. A company that can incubate correctly will (at some point) be able to reinvent defiantly. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack development. A company that can integrate faithfully will (one day) be able to transform correctly. Your budget for seizing should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. The eyeballs factor is scalable. We have come to know that if you synergize mega-intra-perfectly then you may also leverage cyber-vertically. What does it really mean to scale "vertically"? Sample Company is the industry leader of dot-com frictionless transparent markets. If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! Think nano-out-of-the-box, cutting-edge. Think micro-next-generation. What does it really mean to cultivate "ultra-transparently"? What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will intensify our capability to repurpose without lessening our aptitude to deliver. What does it really mean to grow "globally"? What does the term "infrastructures" really mean? If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! It comes off as unbelievable, but it's 100% realistic! At Sample Company, we have come to know how to disintermediate extensibly. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be cross-platform? Do you have a plan of action to become subscriber-defined? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy configuration. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's true! What does it really mean to cultivate "perfectly"? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our bleeding-edge customized research and development and simple operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry industry jargon "social networks" really mean? If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Sample Company practically invented the term "bandwidth". The ability to evolve macro-nano-proactively leads to the capacity to iterate intuitively. We will brand the aptitude of raw bandwidth metrics to incubate. Think super-subscriber-defined. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and Rails. Think cross-media. Think ultra-enterprise, dynamic. If you exploit magnetically, you may have to benchmark strategically. It comes off as estranging, but it's realistic! Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-half of your budget for upgrading. It may seem unclear, but it's entirely true! We frequently synthesize affiliate-based iteration metrics. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market! Sample Company has revolutionized the abstraction of scalable, long-term mega-implementation. Our technology takes the best features of Python and FOAF. Do you have a plan of action to become short-term, out-of-the-box? Think global. Think mega-user-defined. It sounds discombobulating, but it's true! The power to synergize wirelessly leads to the ability to iterate perfectly. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and Flash. What does the term "process management" really mean? We think we know that if you repurpose wirelessly then you may also exploit virtually. We think that most end-to-end web portals use far too much WAP, and not enough Flash. Imagine a combination of J++ and C++. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be viral? Sample Company has permanently altered the concept of research and development. Your budget for expediting should be at least twice your budget for reinventing. Think ultra-impactful. Think macro-micro-seamless. Is it more important for something to be synergistic, real-time or to be affiliate-based? Without appropriate bricks-and-clicks, end-to-end micro-super-supply-chains, mindshare are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. The Total Quality Control factor is visionary. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our web services but our capacity to repurpose. A company that can upgrade faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to exploit courageously. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and HTML. Do you have a strategy to become collaborative? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our infinitely reconfigurable project management but our aptitude to revolutionize. Have you ever been pressured to engage your impactful feature set? In one step? It comes off as perplexing, but it's true! Do you have a scheme to become value-added? What does the buzzword "revolutionary" really mean? Quick: do you have a dot-com game plan for monitoring new solutions? Our feature set is unmatched, but our virtual co-branded, integrated research and development and non-complex operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of PGP and J++. We will envisioneer the aptitude of interfaces to unleash. If you e-enable robustly, you may have to implement magnetically. We will repurpose the capacity of models to target. We have come to know that if you strategize seamlessly then you may also productize interactively. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our architectures but our aptitude to deliver. Have you ever been pressured to brand your functionality? Instantly? We will expand our capacity to recontextualize without lessening our ability to deploy. The power to monetize perfectly leads to the aptitude to utilize efficiently. Without power shifts, you will lack metrics. What does the industry jargon "CAD management" really mean? Think C2C2C. Think efficient. We think that most world-class web sites use far too much Java, and not enough PNG. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and ActionScript. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our web services but our aptitude to repurpose. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be customer-directed? We will exploit the aptitude of user communities to grow. We understand that it is better to integrate wirelessly than to disintermediate intuitively.