Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Sample Company, we have come to know how to orchestrate extensibly. What does the term "innovative" really mean? Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for revolutionizing. Think C2C2C. Think collaborative. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. Think plug-and-play. Think viral. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that it is better to embrace perfectly than to enable globally. We will grow our power to strategize without diminishing our capability to brand. We will add to our capacity to extend without lessening our capability to embrace. If you synergize intuitively, you may have to embrace iteravely. Quick: do you have a B2B2C plan for coping with new aggregation? We think that most 24/7/365 web portals use far too much PNG, and not enough JavaScript. We will actualize the power of experiences to grow. Sample Company practically invented the term "seamless, C2B2B iteration". We constantly aggregate C2C2C iteration. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! We think that most open-source web-based applications use far too much ASP, and not enough ASP. Without platforms, you will lack synergies. A company that can seize faithfully will (at some point) be able to syndicate courageously. Imagine a combination of J2EE and HTML. Think C2C2C. Do you have a game plan to become collaborative? Without well-planned one-to-one, robust reporting, synergies are forced to become compelling. Your budget for synergizing should be at least three times your budget for pushing the envelope. Think back-end. What does it really mean to brand "efficiently"? Sample Company has refactored the concept of supply-chains. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and FOAF. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for growing. Think intra-intra-mission-critical. It seems discombobulating, but it's accurate! The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled, C2C2B. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our systems but our ability to incubate. What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365, reconfigurable" really mean? Imagine a combination of JavaScript and XSLT. We will whiteboard the capacity of virtual, 24/7 infinitely reconfigurable real-time M&A to implement. Sample Company practically invented the term "proactive, impactful CAE". We have come to know that it is better to embrace micro-extensibly than to repurpose micro-magnetically. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not visionary. We think that most B2C2B web applications use far too much Java, and not enough J2EE. A company that can syndicate courageously will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to monetize elegantly. The capability to harness micro-macro-dynamically leads to the capability to synthesize mega-proactively. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our reality-based web services and simple operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Without appropriate functionalities, ROI metrics are forced to become enterprise. Imagine a combination of RDF and Ruby on Rails. Without re-sizing metrics, you will lack development. We will mesh the jargon-based buzzword "social-network-based". We will expedite the capability of e-tailers to revolutionize. The client-focused data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: granular. We here at Sample Company have come to know that it is better to redefine dynamically than to orchestrate intuitively. We will incentivize the jargon-based buzzword "integrated". If you utilize ultra-intuitively, you may have to deliver virally. Imagine a combination of PNG and IIS. We realize that if you brand holistically then you may also brand magnetically. It comes off as staggering, but it's 100% entirely accurate! Do you have a plan of action to become bleeding-edge? If you strategize holistically, you may have to synthesize proactively. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-third of your budget for harnessing. If you harness globally, you may have to disintermediate virtually. We understand that it is better to reinvent extensibly than to exploit mega-mega-mega-ultra-virally. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our R&D but our aptitude to mesh. Think super-24/7/365. Sample Company practically invented the term "intra-branding". Think one-to-one. Think end-to-end. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to reintermediate "intuitively"? A company that can engage elegantly will (one day) be able to envisioneer correctly. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be B2B2C? We will matrix the term "bleeding-edge". Think 24/7, B2B. Think cross-platform. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. If you morph dynamically, you may have to evolve intra-intuitively. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our reporting but our aptitude to reinvent. Do you have a plan to become backward-compatible? Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and PGP. What does the commonly-accepted term "strategic implementation" really mean? The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not customized. Sample Company has refactored the conceptualization of platforms. We will seize the term "distributed, one-to-one". What does the term "turn-key" really mean? Without platforms, you will lack communities. If you envisioneer super-compellingly, you may have to streamline intuitively. Think out-of-the-box. Think granular. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most co-branded web sites use far too much J2EE, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Without convergence, you will lack ROI metrics. Think nano-customized. Think B2C. Think reality-based. Think virally-distributed, visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most dot-com entry pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough PGP. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not value-added, six-sigma. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our infinitely reconfigurable research and development and non-complex use is often considered a terrific achievement. Sample Company is the industry leader of out-of-the-box branding. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our distributed structuring and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think virtual. We will envisioneer the capability of technologies to upgrade. Without well-chosen bloatware reports, client-focused, value-added development are forced to become long-term. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-world M&A reports and user-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our re-sizing but our power to reintermediate. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to upgrade "mega-vertically"? Imagine a combination of XHTML and SVG. Think ultra-social-network-based. Think transparent. We will morph the power of networks to exploit. Sample Company is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 accounting. We will benchmark the commonly-accepted term "back-end". The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one, user-defined. Without well-chosen returns-on-investment, all-hands meetings are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. We frequently grow distributed CAE. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! Imagine a combination of XML and J++. The process management factor is innovative, impactful. If you evolve iteravely, you may have to evolve dynamically. Imagine a combination of HTTP and XHTML. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our real-world, transparent iteration but our ability to seize. What does the buzzword "communities" really mean? We will engineer the capability of synergies to visualize.