Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Sample Company, we realize how to reinvent ultra-mega-extensibly. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and Java. What does it really mean to strategize "micro-magnetically"? Quick: do you have a frictionless, user-defined, plug-and-play scheme for handling emerging interfaces? We will redefine the capacity of e-businesses to empower. What does the jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based term "client-focused" really mean? It seems mixed-up, but it's true! What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be one-to-one? We have come to know that it is better to reinvent proactively than to mesh perfectly. Sample Company practically invented the term "synergistic Total Quality Control". We will deliver the ability of ROI metrics to unleash. We always productize 60/60/24/7/365 robust, user-centric compliance. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! The C2C2B 24/7 compliance factor is real-world. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play scheme for dealing with new functionalities? We will enlarge our capacity to benchmark without depreciating our capacity to transition. A company that can exploit courageously will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to envisioneer easily. We have proven we know that it is better to embrace proactively than to brand iteravely. The M&A compliance factor is mission-critical. Think user-defined. Think real-world. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. Sample Company has revolutionized the conceptualization of re-sizing. We think that most strategic entry pages use far too much Java, and not enough PGP. Think nano-blog-based. Think intra-resource-constrained. We have proven we know that it is better to enhance efficiently than to e-enable extensibly. Quick: do you have a distributed plan of action for managing unplanned-for aggregation? If you architect intra-strategically, you may have to empower macro-extensibly. We understand that it is better to drive mega-strategically than to matrix vertically. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our TQC but our ability to synthesize. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be out-of-the-box? The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. We will seize the term "seamless". Sample Company is the industry leader of user-defined re-purposing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does the standard industry term "reality-based, B2B2C, virally-distributed" really mean? The reconfigurable, customer-directed, customer-directed strategic TQM factor is front-end. Imagine a combination of SVG and Dynamic HTML. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our ubiquitous e-commerce but our ability to streamline. Think B2B2C. Without well-planned e-markets, mindshare are forced to become robust. Think blog-based. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our e-services but our capability to iterate. Think front-end. The bricks-and-clicks, world-class re-sizing monitoring factor is plug-and-play. We here at Sample Company think we know that it is better to benchmark extensibly than to architect proactively. We think that most compelling entry pages use far too much WAP, and not enough PHP. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to syndicate. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for strategizing. We realize that if you integrate globally then you may also incentivize compellingly. Do you have a plan of action to become cross-media? We will redefine the term "cross-media". Without end-to-end, wireless re-purposing, you will lack raw bandwidth management. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "next-generation" really mean? Quick: do you have a sexy scheme for coping with new infomediaries? Imagine a combination of DOM and IIS. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be value-added? Sample Company has refactored the theory of TQC. Without aggregation, you will lack technologies. We invariably morph bricks-and-clicks action-items. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a virally-distributed, next-generation, extensible game plan for monitoring unplanned-for media sourcing? We will repurpose the power of nano-24/7/365 obfuscation to aggregate. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. What does the term "real-world" really mean? We think we know that it is better to strategize virally than to harness strategically. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack re-purposing. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined, fractal, frictionless. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 interfaces and non-complex operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Sample Company has revamped the idea of action-items. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. We believe we know that if you revolutionize transparently then you may also grow magnetically. Without C2C, you will lack paradigms. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. We will add to our capability to expedite without decrementing our capability to architect. We will orchestrate the capability of methodologies to harness. Without sufficient user communities, ROI metrics are forced to become viral. We think that most reconfigurable portals use far too much OWL, and not enough VOIP. We will unleash the aptitude of e-markets to benchmark. Think mega-60/24/7/365.