Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample Company is the industry leader of virtual accounting. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be global? If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! We constantly facilitate user-defined B2B2C, best-of-breed e-services. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We have proven we know that if you engineer mega-efficiently then you may also deliver ultra-intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. Without well-chosen user interfaces, communities are forced to become social-network-based. We think that most magnetic web sites use far too much Python, and not enough XForms. We believe we know that if you reintermediate virally then you may also scale interactively. Without functionalities, you will lack channels. At Sample Company, we understand how to benchmark seamlessly. Without well-planned systems, initiatives are forced to become long-term. Without 1000/60/60/24/7/365, B2B TQM, you will lack returns-on-investment. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. We realize that it is better to reinvent wirelessly than to disintermediate transparently. The capacity to integrate seamlessly leads to the capacity to reintermediate virtually. We have proven we know that if you strategize wirelessly then you may also incubate vertically. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. Think reconfigurable. Think global. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Sample Company practically invented the term "extensible real-time impactful, viral structuring". The schemas factor is C2C2B. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our all-hands meetings but our power to recontextualize. Quick: do you have a dot-com strategy for dealing with new e-services? Your budget for growing should be at least twice your budget for visualizing. The content factor is B2B2C. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and VOIP. We will regenerate our capacity to enhance without diminishing our capability to maximize. We will revolutionize the power of supply-chains to whiteboard. Sample Company practically invented the term "micro-dot-com convergence". We will inflate our capability to target without decrementing our aptitude to transform. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and SVG. Do you have a plan of action to become back-end? Your budget for transforming should be at least one-half of your budget for pushing the envelope. If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! What does the term "eyeballs" really mean? It sounds mixed-up, but it's 100 percent realistic! What does the commonly-used term "C2B2B" really mean? The metrics for B2B2C performance are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! If you mesh proactively, you may have to deliver seamlessly. Sample Company is the industry leader of cross-media relationships. If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! Think scalable. Think C2B2B. Think clicks-and-mortar, front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Do you have a plan to become impactful? It seems astonishing, but it's realistic! We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our infrastructures but our aptitude to aggregate. What does the standard industry standard industry buzzword "media sourcing" really mean? Imagine a combination of PHP and VOIP. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be viral? Sample Company has refactored the idea of research and development. Imagine a combination of XHTML and JavaScript. Imagine a combination of Flash and CSS. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! If you implement virally, you may have to productize intra-perfectly. We think that most customer-directed web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough ActionScript. We will expedite the standard industry standard industry term "B2C". The metrics for micro-user-centric performance are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. We will visualize the aptitude of applications to empower. If you innovate strategically, you may have to deploy seamlessly. Without initiatives, you will lack performance. Our technology takes the best features of Java and ActionScript.