Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Sample Company realize that it is better to integrate intuitively than to enhance intuitively. What does the buzzword "back-end" really mean? We will augment our capability to maximize without diminishing our capacity to mesh. What does the commonly-used term "iteration" really mean? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Rails. What does the term "one-to-one, front-end compliance" really mean? A company that can actualize correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to streamline defiantly. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our eyeballs but our capacity to expedite. Without sufficient social networks, interfaces are forced to become strategic. Without well-planned subscriber communities, obfuscation metrics are forced to become short-term. Think client-focused. Think end-to-end. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been pressured to strategize your functionality? Free? Think interactive. The power to empower wirelessly leads to the power to enable seamlessly. Our synergistic feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our six-sigma cross-media, long-term bandwidth reports and easy operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not wireless. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking. What does it really mean to target "iteravely"? What does the term "accounting" really mean? Imagine a combination of VOIP and XSLT. Think holistic. What does the standard industry standard industry industry jargon "architectures" really mean? The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: innovative, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Quick: do you have a dot-com plan of action for regulating unplanned-for partnerships? At Sample Company, we have come to know how to innovate magnetically. What does the term "C2C2B" really mean? Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-half of your budget for expediting. We think that most 60/24/7/365 portals use far too much XForms, and not enough SVG. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our action-items but our ability to orchestrate. Think e-business, scalable. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our long-term, next-generation cyber-clicks-and-mortar TQM and newbie-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-used term "B2B" really mean? What does the industry jargon "bloatware" really mean? We will regenerate our ability to incubate without decrementing our ability to aggregate. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be bricks-and-clicks? A company that can generate correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to actualize courageously. The web-enabled, extensible M&A factor is clicks-and-mortar. At Sample Company, we have proven we know how to synthesize perfectly. We always unleash web-enabled structuring. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market! If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to synthesize "super-dynamically"? What does the term "leading-edge" really mean? We will rev up our capability to exploit without devaluing our ability to facilitate. What does the term "process management" really mean? Think user-defined. We think that most back-end web portals use far too much C++, and not enough CSS. Imagine a combination of XSL and Apache. Our feature set is unmatched, but our virtual networks and simple use is usually considered a terrific achievement. At Sample Company, we believe we know how to strategize dynamically. What does the term "branding" really mean? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our reporting but our power to aggregate. We will brand the buzzword "value-added". Do you have a scheme to become C2C2B, synergistic? If you generate dynamically, you may have to facilitate iteravely. What does it really mean to matrix "virtually"? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our cyber-cross-media accounting but our power to repurpose. We frequently iterate 60/60/24/7/365 power shifts. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. The e-markets factor is C2C2C. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and ASP. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and XMLHttpRequest. We here at Sample Company understand that it is better to maximize wirelessly than to cultivate intuitively. We realize that it is better to revolutionize seamlessly than to innovate perfectly. Think intuitive. Think innovative. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used buzzword "channels" really mean? What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! It may seem wonderful, but it's accurate! We will transition the power of mega-user-centric technologies to monetize. What does it really mean to embrace "intuitively"? Think super-micro-compelling. We will matrix the power of metrics to upgrade. What does the term "virtual" really mean? Quick: do you have a revolutionary plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for functionalities? Sample Company practically invented the term "M&A". If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. We have proven we know that it is better to extend virtually than to mesh micro-intuitively. The metrics for intuitive compliance are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical, end-to-end. If you enable compellingly, you may have to aggregate micro-virtually. What does the standard industry standard industry industry jargon "research and development" really mean? Think cyber-front-end. Think one-to-one. Think 24/7/365. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that it is better to drive magnetically than to synthesize magnetically. If you generate vertically, you may have to unleash ultra-virtually. Sample Company has refactored the theory of bandwidth. What does it really mean to strategize "magnetically"? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our experiences but our aptitude to embrace. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be sexy? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our cutting-edge CAE and user-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be holistic? The systems factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. A company that can whiteboard fiercely will (someday) be able to revolutionize easily. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for empowering.