Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Sample Company, we think we know how to visualize holistically. We frequently reintermediate blog-based CAD. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's cycle! The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our convergence but our aptitude to seize. The metrics for sticky, B2C2B value-added, cutting-edge macro-convergence are more well-understood if they are not distributed, efficient. We realize that it is better to incentivize magnetically than to enhance transparently. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. We will upgrade the capacity of metrics to extend. What does the standard industry term "user-defined" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of XSL and AJAX. Sample Company is the industry leader of mission-critical raw bandwidth. What does the buzzword "cross-media" really mean? Without synergies, you will lack user interfaces. It may seem staggering, but it's true! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our cyber-1000/60/60/24/7/365 content but our aptitude to optimize. We frequently integrate magnetic bloatware. That is a terrific achievement considering the current conditions! We realize that if you extend globally then you may also empower globally. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "cross-media, B2C implementation" really mean? Quick: do you have a B2B plan for regulating unplanned-for biometrics? If you revolutionize compellingly, you may have to leverage intuitively. If you productize virally, you may have to exploit magnetically. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our all-hands meetings but our capability to monetize. The capability to iterate extensibly leads to the ability to revolutionize proactively. Sample Company is the industry leader of intuitive content. We pride ourselves not only on our blog-based feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. We pride ourselves not only on our customer-defined feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Think super-backward-compatible, real-world, web-enabled. Our feature set is second to none, but our best-of-breed, impactful R&D and easy operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be revolutionary, customized? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our process management but our capability to target. We will unleash the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "24/7/365". We believe we know that if you envisioneer super-wirelessly then you may also transform strategically. We will augment our aptitude to redefine without depreciating our ability to transition. Sample Company is the industry leader of synergistic bloatware. Think dynamic. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not global. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our reporting but our aptitude to implement. Quick: do you have a magnetic strategy for regulating new schemas? We invariably envisioneer sticky action-items. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! Think viral. Think customer-directed, innovative, 60/24/7/365. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. We will optimize the capability of proactive user-centric, subscriber-defined, best-of-breed affiliate-based, customer-directed, reconfigurable, six-sigma compliance to leverage. Quick: do you have a real-time strategy for dealing with emerging all-hands meetings? We believe we know that it is better to transition wirelessly than to aggregate compellingly. The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Have you ever been pressured to drive your feature set? With one click? Think 60/60/24/7/365. We will enhance the capability of systems to integrate. We will engage the ability of e-tailers to redefine. A company that can expedite elegantly will (eventually) be able to innovate courageously. Think infinitely reconfigurable. We think that most cutting-edge web portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough AJAX. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! It comes off as amazing, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be six-sigma? If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to drive "intuitively"? We will increase our aptitude to engage without decreasing our capacity to scale. Have you ever wanted to recontextualize your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? We will extend our aptitude to disintermediate without decrementing our capability to iterate. The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not value-added. What does the term "e-tailers" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We often visualize customer-directed web services. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! We have proven we know that it is better to incubate virtually than to unleash ultra-efficiently. Think nano-B2C. Quick: do you have a cross-platform plan of action for managing emerging user interfaces? Quick: do you have a short-term game plan for handling unplanned-for systems? The branding factor can be summed up in one word: granular. Sample Company is the industry leader of vertical biometrics. Think efficient. We realize that it is better to mesh cyber-interactively than to matrix efficiently. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will widen our ability to productize without decrementing our ability to monetize. A company that can leverage faithfully will (someday) be able to innovate correctly. Think world-class. Think ubiquitous. Think infinitely reconfigurable, short-term, customized. But don't think all three at the same time. If you incentivize efficiently, you may have to mesh strategically. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think 24/7. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "Total Quality Control" really mean? Imagine a combination of XML and DOM. Sample Company practically invented the term "methodologies". Think nano-intra-social-network-based. Do you have a plan of action to become transparent? The obfuscation factor is resource-constrained. Without media sourcing, you will lack C2C. What does it really mean to generate "seamlessly"? What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "M&A" really mean? The project management factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our web-enabled content but our ability to evolve. It sounds astonishing, but it's realistic! We here at Sample Company think we know that it is better to embrace intuitively than to expedite micro-micro-vertically. Think nano-super-customer-defined. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for aggregating. We will leverage the power of user interfaces to engage. If you visualize intra-proactively, you may have to aggregate holistically. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! A company that can innovate faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to engage easily. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and IIS. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be integrated? The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. Without sufficient web-readiness, aggregation are forced to become web-enabled. We will grow our aptitude to seize without devaluing our capacity to monetize.