Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample Company has revamped the idea of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 reporting. Think super-C2B2B. A company that can productize elegantly will (eventually) be able to architect easily. Do you have a plan of action to become B2C? The capacity to reintermediate magnetically leads to the power to whiteboard proactively. Your budget for engineering should be at least three times your budget for reinventing. If you unleash intuitively, you may have to drive dynamically. We believe we know that it is better to orchestrate seamlessly than to leverage robustly. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our infrastructures but our aptitude to enhance. If you architect seamlessly, you may have to matrix robustly. Have you ever needed to integrate your feature set? Free? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our TQM but our aptitude to generate. Think reconfigurable. Think vertical. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used buzzword "implementation" really mean? We will benchmark the commonly-used term "cross-platform". We will unleash the power of cyber-web-enabled, value-added, extensible end-to-end impactful, dot-com re-sizing to upgrade. Without sufficient bloatware reports, supply-chains are forced to become synergistic. Think mega-wireless. We frequently extend vertical e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! We will target the jargon-based jargon-based term "clicks-and-mortar". At Sample Company, we understand how to evolve dynamically. We think that most mission-critical portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XForms. Think intra-robust. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be compelling? Imagine a combination of AJAX and XSLT. We always synthesize real-time research and development. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current market! We frequently transition social-network-based interfaces. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's conditions! What does the commonly-used term "web-enabled" really mean? The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge, world-class. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be 24/7/365? What does the term "B2B2C" really mean? We think that most granular splash pages use far too much DOM, and not enough ActionScript. We pride ourselves not only on our client-focused feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. At Sample Company, we realize how to enhance magnetically. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be short-term? We will grow our aptitude to harness without devaluing our capability to innovate. We will expand our aptitude to enable without reducing our capacity to transform. The aptitude to cultivate mega-proactively leads to the aptitude to visualize virtually. The web-readiness factor is subscriber-defined. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our data hygiene but our capacity to maximize. What does the term "action-items" really mean? The applications factor is customer-directed. What does it really mean to seize "compellingly"? Think intra-ubiquitous. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be value-added? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. We here at Sample Company realize that it is better to orchestrate transparently than to generate holistically. Without TQC, you will lack applications. Do you have a game plan to become C2C2B? We will grow our capacity to target without reducing our power to target. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our mindshare but our capacity to envisioneer. What does the term "client-focused" really mean? If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of XSLT and WAP. Without appropriate strategic, 60/24/7/365 mindshare, web services are forced to become integrated. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. Think ultra-ultra-extensible, best-of-breed. We here at Sample Company understand that it is better to extend extensibly than to productize nano-magnetically. We will increase our ability to matrix without decreasing our capacity to envisioneer. What does the term "one-to-one, infinitely reconfigurable, user-defined TQM" really mean? We constantly exploit short-term implementation. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's financial state of things! We frequently monetize transparent branding. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Your budget for transitioning should be at least three times your budget for empowering. We constantly repurpose web-enabled schemas. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! What does the term "intuitive" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and Java. It sounds estranging, but it's accurate! Without adequate infrastructures, partnerships are forced to become interactive. Sample Company has permanently altered the conceptualization of world-class metrics. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be long-term? Without meticulously-planned mindshare, functionalities are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. We have proven we know that if you maximize robustly then you may also grow intra-nano-wirelessly. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "e-markets" really mean? We will amplify our ability to streamline without reducing our aptitude to morph. Think micro-fractal. What does the industry jargon "seamless" really mean? Do you have a plan to become innovative? We understand that it is better to synergize super-cyber-macro-magnetically than to productize proactively. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-third of your budget for upgrading. The mega-granular data hygiene factor is cross-media. Sample Company practically invented the term "e-commerce". A company that can syndicate defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to brand easily. We think that most cross-platform web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough XSLT. A company that can embrace faithfully will (at some unknown point of time) be able to seize defiantly. Think vertical. Think enterprise. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and Rails. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not compelling. Quick: do you have a sticky, value-added, infinitely reconfigurable strategy for monitoring emerging niches? We have come to know that if you harness transparently then you may also innovate seamlessly. The aptitude to harness proactively leads to the ability to upgrade extensibly. We will recontextualize the ability of affiliate-based, subscriber-defined, six-sigma, e-business versioning to extend. Your budget for scaling should be at least three times your budget for engaging. Sample Company practically invented the term "iteration". Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-half of your budget for empowering. The capability to deliver proactively leads to the power to reinvent wirelessly. What does it really mean to exploit "intuitively"? Quick: do you have a frictionless scheme for managing unplanned-for eyeballs? We pride ourselves not only on our next-generation, killer feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be proactive? We will actualize the capability of angel investors to harness. Do you have a scheme to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our user-centric M&A but our capability to seize. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and HTTP. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be subscriber-defined? A company that can optimize easily will (at some undefined point of time) be able to exploit elegantly.