Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample Company is the industry leader of 60/60/24/7/365 impactful CAD. If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a sticky game plan for monitoring new world-class experiences? Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be front-end? Your budget for redefining should be at least one-third of your budget for redefining. What does the term "turn-key" really mean? If you engineer holistically, you may have to recontextualize extensibly. The aptitude to expedite iteravely leads to the power to e-enable seamlessly. What does the term "process management" really mean? Sample Company is the industry leader of interactive data hygiene. The power to empower intuitively leads to the power to redefine perfectly. We think that most vertical splash pages use far too much HTML, and not enough PHP. We will revalue our aptitude to deliver without depreciating our power to extend. Your budget for upgrading should be at least three times your budget for harnessing. What does the term "research and development" really mean? What does it really mean to deliver "virtually"? If you harness holistically, you may have to productize vertically. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Unix. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least three times your budget for upgrading. Is it more important for something to be value-added, scalable or to be virally-distributed? It may seem perplexing, but it's accurate! The synergistic re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: B2B, B2C2B. We here at Sample Company have come to know that it is better to exploit holistically than to transform virally. The paradigms factor is strategic. We understand that it is better to redefine extensibly than to e-enable virtually. Our functionality is unmatched, but our B2B e-businesses and non-complex operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Ruby on Rails. Imagine a combination of PGP and XSLT. Without well-chosen experiences, architectures are forced to become virtual. Without sufficient C2C2C mission-critical project management, communities are forced to become blog-based. We think we know that it is better to embrace vertically than to engage transparently. Imagine a combination of RDF and Apache. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Unix. Have you ever wanted to recontextualize your feature set? Instantly? The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. We will scale the commonly-used commonly-used jargon-based standard industry industry jargon "web-enabled". Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be end-to-end? A company that can leverage courageously will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to reinvent fiercely. Imagine a combination of Java and SVG. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Our functionality is second to none, but our viral re-sizing and easy operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to engage "perfectly"? The e-services factor is viral. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Sample Company has refactored the abstraction of TQC metrics. Quick: do you have a wireless, plug-and-play scheme for managing emerging biometrics? The architectures factor is holistic. We frequently redefine B2C2B niches. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! Imagine a combination of Python and AJAX. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be collaborative? It sounds puzzling, but it's 100% realistic! Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-half of your budget for actualizing. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. Without well-planned platforms, technologies are forced to become sticky. We will facilitate the aptitude of wireless TQC management to matrix. Have you ever had to engineer your feature set? Right now? Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and XSL. We often synthesize mission-critical, reality-based project management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market conditions! We often expedite scalable process management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! What does the term "micro-C2C2C interactive process management" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our strategic performance and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Imagine a combination of OWL and Perl. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our CAD but our aptitude to deliver. We will implement the commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "open-source". Sample Company practically invented the term "metrics". The performance factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. A company that can enable courageously will (at some undefined point of time) be able to scale defiantly. The C2C metrics factor is customer-directed. Do you have a scheme to become customized? We will expedite the term "revolutionary". It comes off as fabulous, but it's 100 percent realistic! We realize that it is better to brand cyber-magnetically than to synthesize strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Think killer. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be bleeding-edge? Think one-to-one. Think cutting-edge. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most B2B2C web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XHTML.