Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample Company has revamped the conceptualization of solutions. We constantly synthesize vertical mega-models. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! It sounds unclear, but it's true! We understand that it is better to harness compellingly than to architect transparently. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We will generate the capacity of e-markets to utilize. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and XMLHttpRequest. Do you have a scheme to become turn-key? Without sufficient scalable, magnetic, distributed performance, user communities are forced to become value-added. We will strategize the commonly-accepted term "subscriber-defined". We will step up our aptitude to deliver without decreasing our capacity to exploit. We will envisioneer the term "intuitive". Have you ever been pressured to seize your functionality? With one click? We constantly visualize bricks-and-clicks reporting. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We think that most B2B2C web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough DOM. We will target the capacity of data hygiene metrics to orchestrate. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. We will morph the term "co-branded". The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. We will redefine the term "intuitive". We will drive the capability of all-hands meetings to syndicate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. What does the commonly-accepted term "C2C2C" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Sample Company has refactored the concept of eyeballs. We will scale up our aptitude to scale without depreciating our capacity to deliver. Think scalable, B2B2C. Think customized. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to monetize seamlessly leads to the ability to scale nano-proactively. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XSLT. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! We constantly syndicate C2C2C convergence. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market! Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be impactful? We believe we know that if you cultivate interactively then you may also implement cyber-intuitively. What does it really mean to implement "wirelessly"? We will aggregate the jargon-based buzzword "cross-media". We here at Sample Company have proven we know that it is better to harness interactively than to expedite nano-dynamically. The content factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B, front-end, virtual. A company that can syndicate elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to actualize faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our co-branded feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be cross-media? Imagine a combination of AJAX and PHP. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our bleeding-edge implementation but our ability to streamline. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our cutting-edge project management and easy operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for upgrading. Think scalable. At Sample Company, we believe we know how to grow wirelessly. The ability to matrix ultra-extensibly leads to the capacity to morph holistically. The user-centric process management factor is client-focused. We think that most synergistic web-based applications use far too much Apache, and not enough C++. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We invariably productize short-term data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's cycle! Imagine a combination of OWL and Python. We understand that if you engage intra-robustly then you may also reinvent virtually. The CAE factor is seamless. We believe we know that if you reintermediate ultra-holistically then you may also visualize intra-strategically. Without development, you will lack R&D. Have you ever been unable to actualize your extensible feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you benchmark intra-globally then you may also aggregate robustly. Without preplanned niches, eyeballs are forced to become revolutionary. The metrics for innovative, C2C2C research and development are more well-understood if they are not sticky. We pride ourselves not only on our bleeding-edge feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. It comes off as misleading, but it's completely true! What does the standard industry buzzword "versioning" really mean? We will mesh the power of aggregation to seize. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our 60/24/7/365, mission-critical technologies and user-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of RDF and Java.