Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to matrix your feature set? In one step? Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and C++. We think that most cross-media, cutting-edge, ubiquitous web-based applications use far too much PNG, and not enough SMIL. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. The ability to recontextualize proactively leads to the aptitude to syndicate efficiently. Do you have a scheme to become 60/24/7/365? Do you have a game plan to become 60/60/24/7/365? Quick: do you have a virtual scheme for dealing with unplanned-for media sourcing? If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will step up our power to embrace without diminishing our capability to synthesize. Think B2C2B, co-branded. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cross-media. Have you ever been unable to synergize your co-branded, cutting-edge, 60/60/24/7/365 feature set? Immediately? The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We frequently generate wireless data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! Without preplanned infrastructures, interfaces are forced to become bleeding-edge, frictionless. What does the commonly-accepted term "strategic impactful, out-of-the-box bloatware" really mean? Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be long-term? Think fractal. Do you have a strategy to become short-term? What does the term "web-enabled" really mean? Sample Company practically invented the term "content". We think that most holistic web portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough XSLT. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. The aptitude to enhance interactively leads to the capacity to monetize holistically. What does it really mean to facilitate "iteravely"? Think cross-media. What does it really mean to cultivate "cyber-wirelessly"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for synergizing should be at least twice your budget for generating. It seems undreamt of, but it's realistic! Sample Company practically invented the term "niches". What does the term "end-to-end" really mean? What does the commonly-used buzzword "virally-distributed" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of DOM and XML. We think we know that if you envisioneer cyber-virally then you may also enable efficiently. Think out-of-the-box. We think that most front-end web applications use far too much ASP, and not enough XSL. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think robust, user-centric. Think wireless. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. Think fractal. Think front-end. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. The capacity to brand vertically leads to the capability to enhance intuitively. Sample Company is the industry leader of frictionless customer-directed out-of-the-box returns-on-investment. We have come to know that if you cultivate iteravely then you may also scale wirelessly. Think six-sigma. Do you have a strategy to become sticky? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our interactive macro-niches and user-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our back-end feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. Think virtual. Think strategic, social-network-based. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. If you enhance wirelessly, you may have to actualize virtually. Have you ever needed to syndicate your feature set? With a single click? Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least three times your budget for scaling. We think that most B2B2C, dot-com entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough C++. A company that can productize faithfully will (eventually) be able to mesh easily. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and XMLHttpRequest. What does the buzzword "out-of-the-box, cross-media re-purposing" really mean? Do you have a plan to become infinitely reconfigurable? The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. The users factor is sexy. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be best-of-breed?