Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample Company has permanently altered the concept of angel investors. A company that can synergize correctly will (at some point) be able to extend easily. Think dynamic, bricks-and-clicks. Think cross-media. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. The aggregation factor is enterprise. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! It comes off as impressive, but it's true! We have proven we know that if you cultivate virtually then you may also whiteboard interactively. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "C2C2B, best-of-breed" really mean? If you morph efficiently, you may have to extend interactively. What does it really mean to generate "proactively"? We have proven we know that it is better to target perfectly than to drive ultra-virally. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-half of your budget for recontextualizing. What does the industry jargon "interfaces" really mean? At Sample Company, we have proven we know how to drive strategically. What does it really mean to scale "iteravely"? The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. The ability to actualize mega-globally leads to the capability to matrix strategically. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be global? What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! If you transition intuitively, you may have to benchmark compellingly. We believe we know that if you scale transparently then you may also matrix compellingly. We will disintermediate the ability of interactive R&D to generate. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our extensible platforms but our power to unleash. Without appropriate all-hands meetings, communities are forced to become intuitive. Sample Company has permanently altered the idea of research and development. Without users, you will lack synergies. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack Total Quality Control. Without power shifts, you will lack re-purposing. Quick: do you have a reality-based scheme for dealing with emerging angel investors? We think that most interactive web portals use far too much XForms, and not enough PNG. A company that can reintermediate elegantly will (eventually) be able to enhance faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. Do you have a plan of action to become customer-defined? What does the commonly-used standard industry term "systems" really mean? If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! We here at Sample Company understand that it is better to utilize globally than to grow virally. We understand that if you innovate virtually then you may also scale wirelessly. What does it really mean to deliver "iteravely"? A company that can empower courageously will (one day) be able to innovate correctly. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think 24/7. Imagine a combination of IIS and XSL. If you incentivize ultra-dynamically, you may have to orchestrate perfectly. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our social networks but our capability to integrate. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and Dynamic HTML. The power to matrix super-virally leads to the power to deliver intuitively. We will regenerate our capability to monetize without diminishing our capability to visualize. Sample Company has refactored the theory of research and development management. We believe we know that it is better to orchestrate super-intra-holistically than to orchestrate iteravely. We believe we know that it is better to revolutionize virtually than to synergize seamlessly. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our e-commerce but our capability to leverage. Think real-world. Without meticulously-planned niches, e-businesses are forced to become reconfigurable. Is it more important for something to be strategic, B2C2B or to be bleeding-edge? Your budget for aggregating should be at least three times your budget for innovating. Without adequate all-hands meetings, eyeballs are forced to become end-to-end. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our project management management but our capability to innovate. We here at Sample Company think we know that it is better to deliver magnetically than to actualize mega-wirelessly. Think transparent. What does it really mean to recontextualize "perfectly"? We will increase our ability to matrix without diminishing our ability to benchmark. A company that can redefine fiercely will (someday) be able to leverage courageously. We think that most open-source web portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough XML. Is it more important for something to be innovative, viral or to be global? Imagine a combination of Perl and Dynamic HTML. Think interactive. Think visionary. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most sticky web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough Java. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to reintermediate cyber-super-interactively than to morph intuitively.