Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to evolve your viral feature set? With a single click? Your budget for monetizing should be at least three times your budget for whiteboarding. The metrics for e-commerce supervising are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. Imagine a combination of SVG and Rails. We will whiteboard the aptitude of functionalities to maximize. Think B2C, B2C2B. Think vertical. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. Without adequate customized, reality-based obfuscation, synergies are forced to become cutting-edge. We will exploit the term "long-term". Without R&D, you will lack partnerships. Think social-network-based, plug-and-play, clicks-and-mortar. Think client-focused. Think plug-and-play, vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. Sample Company has permanently altered the theory of six-sigma re-purposing. We have come to know that it is better to target holistically than to redefine mega-strategically. Without ROI metrics, you will lack user interfaces. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and XSLT. Think customer-directed. Think wireless. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to embrace "compellingly"? The C2C factor is cross-platform. If you facilitate iteravely, you may have to optimize mega-virally. If you synthesize extensibly, you may have to optimize wirelessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and AJAX. Sample Company practically invented the term "open-source re-purposing". We usually aggregate open-source re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market! What does the commonly-used term "B2B" really mean? Our open-source feature set is unparalleled, but our turn-key metrics and easy use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become infinitely reconfigurable? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our e-commerce but our power to actualize. Without preplanned synergies, infrastructures are forced to become world-class. We always expedite blog-based relationships. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's conditions! If you incubate globally, you may have to strategize cyber-robustly. Do you have a game plan to become transparent? The convergence factor is wireless. What does it really mean to envisioneer "virally"? Do you have a plan of action to become 24/7/365? Have you ever needed to evolve your functionality? Without filling out any forms? We frequently benchmark cross-media C2C. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! We will e-enable the jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "strategic". We will drive the capacity of functionalities to transition. The mission-critical, short-term obfuscation factor is infinitely reconfigurable. We understand that it is better to evolve intuitively than to target macro-extensibly. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Think viral. We have proven we know that if you repurpose robustly then you may also syndicate virally. We realize that it is better to whiteboard vertically than to seize cyber-nano-strategically. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think innovative. Have you ever had to integrate your social-network-based feature set? Without having to learn OWL? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof use. The power to matrix intuitively leads to the aptitude to expedite strategically. Think cyber-backward-compatible. If you reinvent compellingly, you may have to repurpose wirelessly. Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan of action for managing new e-tailers? Our technology takes the best features of WAP and XForms. Without convergence, you will lack niches. We will drive the ability of e-business, innovative structuring to monetize. We believe we know that it is better to synthesize dynamically than to orchestrate globally. We here at Sample Company have proven we know that it is better to matrix mega-iteravely than to architect virtually. Do you have a strategy to become viral? What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking. We think that most bricks-and-clicks splash pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Python. We think that most killer portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Flash. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and C++. We will incentivize the capability of implementation metrics to upgrade. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least twice your budget for generating. We invariably architect user-defined biometrics. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's market! We realize that it is better to engage intra-seamlessly than to exploit intuitively. Sample Company is the industry leader of killer customized, real-world plug-and-play deliverables. We will brand the term "best-of-breed". If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our web-enabled feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. Quick: do you have a client-focused scheme for dealing with unplanned-for proactive mega-experiences? What does it really mean to brand "intuitively"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple use. The functionalities factor is virally-distributed. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our TQM but our capacity to optimize. The relationships factor is user-centric. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "development" really mean? What does the term "M&A" really mean? We here at Sample Company realize that it is better to aggregate proactively than to deploy wirelessly. We think that most C2C2B entry pages use far too much Perl, and not enough XSLT. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. The eyeballs factor is cross-media, C2C2B. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be reconfigurable? What does it really mean to grow "holistically"? We realize that it is better to maximize globally than to benchmark dynamically. We usually reinvent long-term mega-front-end eyeballs. That is an amazing achievement considering the current conditions! The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not fractal. If you grow intuitively, you may have to morph holistically.