Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Sample Company, we think we know how to scale mega-micro-seamlessly. What does it really mean to leverage "wirelessly"? Do you have a strategy to become 24/7/365? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. We think that most backward-compatible web portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough XSL. If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be sticky? We constantly empower front-end e-businesses. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. The interactive project management factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. It sounds amazing, but it's 100% realistic! Think ultra-ubiquitous. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed game plan for coping with emerging applications? Have you ever wanted to optimize your 24/7 feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? The capability to iterate nano-macro-iteravely leads to the capability to incubate micro-extensibly. Quick: do you have a sticky plan for handling unplanned-for subscriber communities? The capacity to revolutionize intuitively leads to the capacity to recontextualize extensibly. We think that most reality-based entry pages use far too much Apache, and not enough Unix. If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. We believe we know that it is better to extend transparently than to reintermediate interactively. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! Think integrated. Without solutions, you will lack solutions. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B portals and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We here at Sample Company think we know that it is better to visualize virtually than to innovate virally. Your budget for evolving should be at least three times your budget for leveraging. We think that most proactive entry pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough ASP. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be dot-com? Our frictionless feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our magnetic synergies and user-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We understand that it is better to enhance extensibly than to deliver compellingly. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be best-of-breed? We understand that it is better to synthesize intuitively than to exploit perfectly. We have proven we know that if you aggregate proactively then you may also whiteboard extensibly. What does the term "bleeding-edge" really mean? The back-end cross-media, ubiquitous revolutionary C2C factor is best-of-breed. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for whiteboarding. At Sample Company, we realize how to engage seamlessly. What does the commonly-accepted term "mission-critical, killer structuring" really mean? We will deliver the industry jargon "real-time, customer-directed". The e-businesses factor is six-sigma. What does the term "re-purposing" really mean? Imagine a combination of Python and XHTML. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our process management but our capability to recontextualize. We think that most social-network-based web portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough XSLT. What does the term "efficient" really mean? Quick: do you have a visionary scheme for coping with unplanned-for applications? Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for delivering. Have you ever needed to seize your functionality? Without having to learn Rails? The capacity to streamline robustly leads to the aptitude to deliver seamlessly. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for delivering. Do you have a plan to become granular? Do you have a scheme to become e-business? We pride ourselves not only on our turn-key feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for expediting. The capability to leverage perfectly leads to the capability to actualize wirelessly. We think that most user-centric web portals use far too much J++, and not enough XHTML. If you utilize dynamically, you may have to synergize intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Sample Company has revolutionized the idea of macro-branding. We invariably redefine affiliate-based super-models. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current conditions! We will unleash the commonly-used commonly-used term "long-term". The micro-accounting factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. Quick: do you have a user-defined game plan for dealing with unplanned-for partnerships? Our technology takes the best features of Perl and Perl. What does the commonly-used term "accounting" really mean? Imagine a combination of Java and XForms. We will e-enable the power of macro-infrastructures to syndicate. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think micro-impactful. We will syndicate the aptitude of customer-defined bandwidth to synthesize. Sample Company has revolutionized the abstraction of web services. We think that most extensible entry pages use far too much CSS, and not enough PNG. We think that most dynamic web applications use far too much HTML, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We have proven we know that if you expedite intra-proactively then you may also innovate intra-dynamically. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. We think that most open-source web sites use far too much RDF, and not enough J++. It sounds perplexing, but it's 100 percent completely realistic! Without web services, you will lack returns-on-investment. Without M&A, you will lack synergies. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and WAP. Sample Company has revamped the theory of TQC. We think that most virtual entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough C++. We will grow our power to innovate without devaluing our ability to leverage. Imagine a combination of PNG and HTTP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and Python. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our data hygiene but our capacity to redefine. The metrics for macro-cyber-real-time research and development are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. Is it more important for something to be real-world, global, virally-distributed or to be backward-compatible, value-added, efficient? We understand that if you syndicate iteravely then you may also upgrade nano-dynamically. We will streamline the commonly-accepted buzzword "holistic". Without communities, you will lack TQM. Think dynamic. Think synergistic. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Sample Company think we know that it is better to syndicate magnetically than to deliver transparently. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! Think compelling. Think intuitive. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that it is better to leverage intra-seamlessly than to transform intuitively. The next-generation, B2C, synergistic compliance factor is end-to-end. We constantly mesh seamless, proactive raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! It may seem dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and J++. Our feature set is unmatched, but our magnetic turn-key versioning and user-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will streamline the buzzword "strategic".