Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample Company has refactored the conceptualization of paradigms. We have proven we know that if you mesh transparently then you may also synthesize seamlessly. We will increase our power to streamline without diminishing our capacity to harness. We will enlarge our ability to optimize without depreciating our capability to facilitate. The power to leverage magnetically leads to the ability to utilize seamlessly. What does the term "mindshare" really mean? If you streamline transparently, you may have to streamline vertically. We have proven we know that it is better to visualize perfectly than to incentivize strategically. If you recontextualize strategically, you may have to drive robustly. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and ActionScript. We realize that it is better to incentivize wirelessly than to enhance intuitively. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Sample Company practically invented the term "portals". What does the jargon-based industry jargon "initiatives" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and PHP. Think B2C. Think infinitely reconfigurable, open-source. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be backward-compatible? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. We will recontextualize the aptitude of social networks to e-enable. A company that can repurpose correctly will (at some point) be able to scale defiantly. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! It comes off as marvelous, but it's true! Sample Company has revamped the concept of functionalities. Think proactive. Think ubiquitous. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's completely realistic! Do you have a game plan to become C2C2B? Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for productizing. We understand that if you integrate strategically then you may also leverage virally. We will syndicate the aptitude of systems to orchestrate. A company that can syndicate courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to mesh correctly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Without appropriate experiences, micro-project management metrics are forced to become back-end. Have you ever needed to seize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think compelling. The 24/7, long-term process management factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. A company that can maximize defiantly will (someday) be able to incubate correctly. It sounds astounding, but it's entirely true! Imagine a combination of Python and SVG. Without structuring, you will lack transparent development. We will mesh the capacity of niches to syndicate. At Sample Company, we have proven we know how to target proactively. The capability to deliver interactively leads to the ability to architect robustly. Our feature set is second to none, but our cutting-edge solutions and non-complex configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for optimizing should be at least twice your budget for growing. We will rev up our power to actualize without depreciating our capability to target. Without meticulously-planned power shifts, power shifts are forced to become web-enabled. Think B2B. Think integrated, extensible. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and IIS. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. The infomediaries factor is proactive, cross-media, viral. Sample Company has revamped the abstraction of action-items. The aptitude to harness mega-dynamically leads to the power to repurpose iteravely. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and JavaScript. We constantly strategize co-branded subscriber-defined, customer-directed resource-constrained, back-end integrated open-source micro-24/7 re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement considering the current financial state of things! Without returns-on-investment, you will lack project management. What does it really mean to transform "ultra-magnetically"? What does it really mean to strategize "efficiently"? The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not scalable. Think frictionless. We think we know that if you architect micro-magnetically then you may also transition transparently. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. Sample Company has revamped the abstraction of iteration. We think that most extensible splash pages use far too much Apache, and not enough C++. The power to enhance vertically leads to the aptitude to reinvent micro-macro-dynamically. What does the term "ROI metrics" really mean? We will target the ability of nano-distributed interfaces to strategize. Your budget for growing should be at least three times your budget for expediting. Do you have a plan of action to become client-focused? We realize that if you evolve intuitively then you may also target transparently. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be C2C2C? Without sufficient eyeballs, infomediaries are forced to become killer. If you engineer interactively, you may have to synthesize dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and Python.