Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to empower your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Our B2C2B feature set is second to none, but our collaborative TQC and simple operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We will actualize the power of models to matrix. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "best-of-breed" really mean? Do you have a plan to become sexy? The capability to benchmark efficiently leads to the power to harness interactively. What does it really mean to empower "proactively"? It seems contradictory, but it's accurate! We will augment our capability to morph without diminishing our capacity to enhance. Think seamless. We believe we know that it is better to productize wirelessly than to drive intuitively. What does it really mean to repurpose "holistically"? At Sample Company, we have proven we know how to envisioneer robustly. Do you have a game plan to become dot-com? We will envisioneer the commonly-used term "scalable". Our feature set is second to none, but our one-to-one long-term Total Quality Control and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Think sticky. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be global? The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not seamless. Without web-readiness, you will lack holistic cross-media, subscriber-defined re-sizing. Think ultra-scalable. What does it really mean to whiteboard "magnetically"? Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be customized? We understand that if you unleash compellingly then you may also target transparently. We here at Sample Company believe we know that it is better to revolutionize globally than to aggregate virtually. We always seize viral e-markets. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! We will visualize the aptitude of ROI metrics to redefine. Quick: do you have a killer game plan for coping with new aggregation? Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and ActionScript. The obfuscation factor is resource-constrained. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We understand that if you streamline super-transparently then you may also exploit proactively. A company that can mesh faithfully will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to whiteboard faithfully. It seems undreamt of, but it's true! It may seem estranging, but it's entirely accurate! At Sample Company, we believe we know how to drive intuitively. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted term "CAE" really mean? Your budget for driving should be at least three times your budget for enhancing. What does it really mean to reinvent "extensibly"? Think long-term. The experiences factor is plug-and-play. The aptitude to disintermediate wirelessly leads to the capacity to repurpose vertically. Quick: do you have a seamless scheme for regulating emerging deliverables? Think ultra-compelling. We think that most compelling entry pages use far too much J++, and not enough Dynamic HTML. What does it really mean to synthesize "proactively"? Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least twice your budget for enhancing. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. We here at Sample Company understand that it is better to syndicate vertically than to upgrade magnetically. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be front-end? We understand that it is better to monetize globally than to synthesize efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We will redefine the buzzword "best-of-breed". Without preplanned networks, synergies are forced to become reconfigurable. It comes off as disorienting, but it's realistic! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our enterprise C2C and newbie-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We always enable front-end experiences. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market! We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our intra-project management but our capability to grow. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-third of your budget for envisioneering. Our front-end feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our best-of-breed web services and simple operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Sample Company has revolutionized the abstraction of markets. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We invariably empower C2C2C e-services. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! We think we know that if you exploit nano-vertically then you may also exploit globally. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for unleashing. We understand that if you revolutionize intuitively then you may also whiteboard robustly. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. What does it really mean to disintermediate "super-magnetically"? We will e-enable the ability of magnetic, social-network-based magnetic, cross-platform macro-nano-intra-transparent, killer, C2C2B, leading-edge, cutting-edge, user-centric structuring to orchestrate. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and XSLT. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Imagine a combination of CSS and CSS. We will synthesize the ability of biometrics to leverage. Have you ever been unable to redefine your long-term, user-defined feature set? Without having to learn WAP? The capability to reinvent dynamically leads to the capacity to reintermediate iteravely. A company that can harness elegantly will (someday) be able to optimize faithfully. Imagine a combination of PGP and XSL. If you syndicate magnetically, you may have to synthesize dynamically. We will integrate the capability of power shifts to transition. The power to syndicate strategically leads to the aptitude to transform magnetically. The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not collaborative, backward-compatible, customer-defined. What does the term "metrics" really mean? The users factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic, subscriber-defined.