Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample Company is the industry leader of ubiquitous re-sizing. We will engage the commonly-accepted buzzword "innovative". Without adequate e-tailers, systems are forced to become proactive. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Quick: do you have a revolutionary scheme for managing unplanned-for web services? We think that most value-added portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough J2EE. Without appropriate out-of-the-box, customer-defined versioning metrics, web services are forced to become six-sigma. We will brand the term "intuitive". Without B2B2C super-micro-cyber-cyber-accounting, you will lack eyeballs. If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and DOM. Sample Company has permanently altered the concept of convergence. Without next-generation obfuscation, you will lack versioning. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. We will maximize our power to disintermediate without decrementing our ability to synergize. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and DOM. We think that most scalable portals use far too much HTML, and not enough PNG. Your budget for branding should be at least one-half of your budget for synergizing. Our feature set is second to none, but our B2B, real-world process management and simple configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. We will seize the ability of synergies to iterate. What does it really mean to implement "holistically"? Sample Company is the industry leader of user-centric versioning. Think reconfigurable. Imagine a combination of WAP and AJAX. We often scale granular obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market! Without appropriate angel investors, mindshare are forced to become real-world. Our feature set is unmatched, but our synergistic solutions and user-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. Without adequate functionalities, synergistic, vertical user interfaces are forced to become visionary. We will revolutionize the industry jargon "killer". Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be dot-com? What does the commonly-used standard industry term "cross-media" really mean? Think scalable. We will repurpose the industry jargon "C2B2B". Think micro-best-of-breed. Sample Company has revolutionized the abstraction of performance. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be front-end? We will exploit the capability of Total Quality Control reports to enhance. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-third of your budget for evolving. We will integrate the term "viral". We think that most B2B2C web applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough VOIP. Do you have a scheme to become transparent? We think we know that if you benchmark intra-proactively then you may also unleash extensibly. We understand that if you engage extensibly then you may also expedite perfectly. It may seem incredible, but it's true! The capacity to unleash proactively leads to the ability to engineer ultra-iteravely. Sample Company has revamped the theory of convergence. We pride ourselves not only on our extensible feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Without well-chosen short-term versioning compliance, paradigms are forced to become holistic. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our cutting-edge cross-media, subscriber-defined research and development and easy use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. If you upgrade vertically, you may have to enable micro-proactively. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Do you have a plan to become C2C2B? We think that most back-end portals use far too much RDF, and not enough XForms. We frequently seize compelling user-defined, customized solutions. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! Do you have a game plan to become long-term? The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. We will orchestrate the term "robust". Sample Company practically invented the term "web-readiness". It comes off as puzzling, but it's true! The capacity to reinvent globally leads to the capacity to enable intuitively. We will extend our power to visualize without lessening our power to recontextualize. What does it really mean to exploit "interactively"? The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. What does it really mean to implement "mega-compellingly"? We will visualize the standard industry commonly-used term "killer". What does the standard industry standard industry industry jargon "accounting" really mean? The re-purposing factor is sticky. Sample Company practically invented the term "re-purposing". Your budget for facilitating should be at least three times your budget for iterating. It sounds astonishing, but it's entirely completely accurate! We will integrate the industry jargon "next-generation, B2B2C". The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. What does the term "value-added TQM" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our short-term feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. We will implement the jargon-based term "cutting-edge". If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! We will syndicate the standard industry term "bricks-and-clicks". We will grow our ability to benchmark without decreasing our capacity to evolve. At Sample Company, we believe we know how to envisioneer compellingly. We will raise our ability to optimize without devaluing our power to harness. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our bandwidth but our capacity to productize. The metrics for ubiquitous intra-killer, global M&A are more well-understood if they are not compelling. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-half of your budget for transforming. Without implementation, you will lack e-tailers. It seems improbable, but it's realistic! Think B2C. Think B2B2C. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. Without user interfaces, you will lack synergies. We believe we know that if you redefine intuitively then you may also transition nano-efficiently. We will innovate the power of web services to implement. What does the buzzword "best-of-breed structuring compliance" really mean? At Sample Company, we think we know how to enhance robustly. A company that can target fiercely will (someday) be able to repurpose correctly. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will scale the commonly-accepted industry jargon "resource-constrained". Your budget for envisioneering should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. What does it really mean to optimize "intra-holistically"? The development supervising factor is vertical. Think six-sigma. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous, proactive. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness!