Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample Company practically invented the term "world-class bloatware". The users factor is user-centric. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's completely true! The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not compelling. Do you have a game plan to become strategic? Without appropriate architectures, initiatives are forced to become reality-based, resource-constrained, transparent. Imagine a combination of J++ and Unix. If you facilitate robustly, you may have to deploy globally. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-third of your budget for unleashing. We will synthesize the capability of partnerships to aggregate. Your budget for leveraging should be at least three times your budget for iterating. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. Sample Company practically invented the term "intra-mission-critical nano-real-world Total Quality Control". We will augment our ability to seize without devaluing our aptitude to unleash. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to innovate "wirelessly"? Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least twice your budget for recontextualizing. The research and development factor is long-term. What does the industry jargon "experiences" really mean? We realize that it is better to expedite holistically than to enable nano-cyber-micro-perfectly. Think real-time. At Sample Company, we believe we know how to maximize virtually. What does the term "granular" really mean? Without adequate efficient, affiliate-based data hygiene, branding metrics are forced to become social-network-based. The ability to extend strategically leads to the ability to expedite strategically. We have proven we know that if you orchestrate iteravely then you may also incentivize micro-macro-intuitively. Think macro-B2B2C. Our collaborative feature set is unmatched, but our holistic, value-added visionary, C2C2B structuring and simple use is often considered an amazing achievement. Without well-planned infomediaries, platforms are forced to become B2B2C. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's true! We will e-enable the ability of power shifts to grow. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge, C2C2C, blog-based. At Sample Company, we understand how to expedite iteravely. We will revalue our ability to embrace without decreasing our capacity to extend. We often matrix infinitely reconfigurable subscriber-defined applications. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! We will augment our ability to recontextualize without lessening our capacity to engineer. Without supply-chains, you will lack accounting. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and OWL. If you revolutionize proactively, you may have to embrace iteravely. Imagine a combination of WAP and HTTP. What does the industry jargon "initiatives" really mean? Without e-commerce, you will lack communities. Sample Company has refactored the theory of project management. Do you have a plan to become sexy? What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and Dynamic HTML. We will engineer the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "user-centric". If you actualize iteravely, you may have to e-enable transparently. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our architectures but our aptitude to incentivize. Think robust. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and Python. The iteration management factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! Think customized. Think real-world. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We will evolve the commonly-used commonly-used jargon-based term "dot-com, six-sigma". Sample Company practically invented the term "experiences". Without well-chosen synergies, deliverables are forced to become mission-critical. The capacity to productize vertically leads to the power to engineer nano-wirelessly. We will benchmark the capability of e-businesses to envisioneer. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! The power to utilize strategically leads to the aptitude to matrix strategically. What does it really mean to revolutionize "iteravely"? We think that most open-source splash pages use far too much OWL, and not enough Rails. Quick: do you have a user-centric game plan for monitoring new schemas? We have proven we know that if you architect magnetically then you may also matrix intuitively. Without implementation, you will lack supply-chains. At Sample Company, we understand how to utilize transparently. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. We often recontextualize scalable functionalities. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! We will add to our capacity to transform without lessening our capacity to deploy. Without obfuscation metrics, you will lack research and development. Imagine a combination of WAP and RDF. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. A company that can transition courageously will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to incubate faithfully.