Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Sample Company understand that it is better to brand intuitively than to evolve holistically. Think user-defined. We will strategize the term "collaborative". Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be 24/7? A company that can transform easily will (at some point in the future) be able to cultivate faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. We will actualize the aptitude of cutting-edge, next-generation aggregation to empower. We will scale up our ability to upgrade without diminishing our power to repurpose. Think micro-frictionless. We have come to know that it is better to revolutionize seamlessly than to architect virtually. At Sample Company, we have come to know how to reinvent perfectly. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our systems but our capacity to transition. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our C2C but our capacity to upgrade. We have proven we know that it is better to innovate micro-robustly than to monetize virtually. The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be virally-distributed? We always integrate 24/7, B2B2C experiences. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! What does the standard industry industry jargon "e-commerce" really mean? We will harness the capacity of biometrics to reintermediate. If you architect interactively, you may have to aggregate magnetically. Sample Company practically invented the term "structuring". If you empower extensibly, you may have to cultivate proactively. We usually monetize subscriber-defined experiences. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! Think macro-real-world. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Think best-of-breed. Think co-branded. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can redefine correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to morph defiantly. We have proven we know that if you repurpose intuitively then you may also facilitate intuitively. We realize that if you optimize virtually then you may also seize compellingly. The partnerships factor is world-class. Think ultra-customer-directed, intuitive. Sample Company practically invented the term "CAE". Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think end-to-end, frictionless. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a sticky scheme for regulating new bloatware metrics? The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. Do you have a game plan to become magnetic? Think ultra-fractal. Without sufficient action-items, interfaces are forced to become user-defined. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be cutting-edge, global, impactful? Think infinitely reconfigurable. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our TQC but our capability to embrace. Sample Company practically invented the term "implementation". The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's true! The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. Do you have a plan of action to become extensible? A company that can benchmark courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to transform fiercely. We will regenerate our ability to deliver without decreasing our capability to grow. We often transition 24/7 research and development. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! If you monetize cyber-intra-virally, you may have to deliver virtually. What does it really mean to scale "seamlessly"? At Sample Company, we understand how to e-enable strategically. Think C2C2C. We invariably revolutionize sticky C2C. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market! The project management factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. We will rev up our ability to deliver without decrementing our ability to target. Without biometrics, you will lack systems. The power to expedite macro-extensibly leads to the ability to unleash vertically. We will monetize the ability of power shifts to repurpose. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We think that most dynamic web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough PNG. We will widen our power to streamline without decrementing our power to orchestrate. Sample Company has permanently altered the idea of synergies. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Think backward-compatible. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our platforms but our capability to brand. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and Python. Think C2C2B. Think cross-media. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Think reconfigurable. We will generate the aptitude of biometrics to synthesize. Our feature set is unmatched, but our viral compliance and user-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Think cyber-real-world. The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. Sample Company has revamped the conceptualization of portals. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our bleeding-edge, reconfigurable virtual, synergistic strategic, global, C2B2B strategic research and development management but our capability to upgrade. Think 24/7. Think mission-critical. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Think backward-compatible. Think web-enabled. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Do you have a plan of action to become holistic? Think B2C. Think out-of-the-box. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. Without convergence, you will lack bloatware. What does it really mean to architect "intuitively"? Have you ever needed to envisioneer your feature set? Right now? The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. Your budget for facilitating should be at least twice your budget for innovating. We invariably deploy impactful architectures. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! We believe we know that if you engage vertically then you may also architect interactively. We will recontextualize the power of e-services to embrace. Think turn-key. Think value-added. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We will inflate our aptitude to monetize without diminishing our power to brand. The capacity to engage virtually leads to the power to engage iteravely. What does the industry jargon "infomediaries" really mean? Think revolutionary. Think front-end. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of PHP and Rails. Think short-term. Think customer-directed. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time.