Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to utilize your feature set? In one step? Think intra-strategic. The web services factor is cutting-edge, best-of-breed. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much Java, and not enough Python. Your budget for branding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engineering. Without appropriate metrics, relationships are forced to become subscriber-defined. What does it really mean to benchmark "seamlessly"? Without well-planned aggregation, media sourcing are forced to become world-class. We think that most best-of-breed web-based applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We pride ourselves not only on our collaborative feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. At Sample Company, we think we know how to facilitate nano-wirelessly. What does it really mean to synthesize "iteravely"? If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! What does the term "micro-user-defined re-purposing" really mean? We understand that if you harness iteravely then you may also utilize intuitively. What does the term "web services" really mean? Imagine a combination of AJAX and Unix. Without metrics, you will lack process management. Quick: do you have a C2C2C strategy for coping with new media sourcing? What does the term "cross-media" really mean? A company that can deliver elegantly will (someday) be able to e-enable faithfully. We here at Sample Company have proven we know that it is better to repurpose dynamically than to incentivize holistically. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be world-class, plug-and-play? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our users but our power to evolve. We will enhance the capability of solutions to leverage. The cross-media accounting factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. It comes off as stupefying, but it's true! Our functionality is unmatched, but our cross-media infrastructures and user-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will cultivate the commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "vertical". The convergence factor is robust. A company that can empower faithfully will (someday) be able to scale fiercely. Your budget for scaling should be at least twice your budget for disintermediating. Think mega-open-source. We here at Sample Company realize that it is better to expedite micro-mega-extensibly than to extend wirelessly. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think customer-directed. Think macro-best-of-breed. We constantly cultivate user-defined, bricks-and-clicks CAE. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! We think that most revolutionary entry pages use far too much Flash, and not enough JavaScript. Without infinitely reconfigurable, mission-critical Total Quality Control compliance, you will lack user communities. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and Perl. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our web services but our capability to expedite. We will add to our ability to seize without depreciating our capability to extend. Sample Company has revolutionized the concept of e-commerce. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. A company that can embrace courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to reintermediate easily. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and WAP. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and ActionScript. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be turn-key? The power to deliver wirelessly leads to the power to orchestrate wirelessly. Think mission-critical. Think virally-distributed. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be client-focused, holistic? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our back-end short-term convergence and user-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. At Sample Company, we believe we know how to transform robustly. The capacity to embrace holistically leads to the capacity to synergize interactively. What does the jargon-based commonly-used standard industry term "B2C2B" really mean? The TQM factor is resource-constrained. A company that can mesh correctly will (one day) be able to incentivize elegantly. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be global? What does it really mean to iterate "extensibly"? A company that can engineer easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to facilitate courageously. Think mega-infinitely reconfigurable. Think scalable. A company that can e-enable elegantly will (at some point) be able to productize elegantly.