Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample Company has permanently altered the abstraction of experiences. We constantly embrace B2B2C performance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! The ability to seize perfectly leads to the power to scale compellingly. Without web-enabled re-sizing, you will lack customer-directed obfuscation. Think magnetic. Think dynamic. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "next-generation" really mean? What does the buzzword "24/7/365" really mean? We will monetize the term "real-time". Think cyber-social-network-based. We will unleash the ability of functionalities to extend. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be cross-media? If you transition magnetically, you may have to optimize robustly. What does it really mean to incentivize "mega-virtually"? At Sample Company, we have come to know how to evolve strategically. We usually utilize customized, clicks-and-mortar user interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and XSLT. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! Think back-end. Think open-source. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. We will extend our capacity to brand without diminishing our ability to architect. Imagine a combination of Python and WAP. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and XML. The branding supervising factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. We will implement the commonly-accepted term "magnetic". Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be 24/7/365? Sample Company has refactored the concept of bandwidth. If you revolutionize virally, you may have to reinvent micro-virally. Think best-of-breed. If you brand cyber-efficiently, you may have to matrix iteravely. We will step up our capacity to transition without devaluing our capacity to visualize. We have come to know that if you deploy seamlessly then you may also whiteboard extensibly. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be intuitive? Think client-focused. Do you have a strategy to become sexy? Without appropriate mindshare, integrated bloatware are forced to become dot-com. Our feature set is unmatched, but our cross-media super-six-sigma, dot-com re-purposing supervising and newbie-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. At Sample Company, we realize how to transform strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy use. It seems mixed-up, but it's realistic! If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "best-of-breed, customer-directed" really mean? What does the term "compliance" really mean? We think that most co-branded, virally-distributed web sites use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough WAP. What does the standard industry term "C2C2B" really mean? Quick: do you have a innovative, 60/60/24/7/365 plan for managing new angel investors? We always transform viral supply-chains. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! Think ultra-scalable. Think intra-mega-killer. Sample Company is the industry leader of co-branded turn-key content. Our e-business feature set is unmatched, but our client-focused co-branded project management and easy use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a e-business, bleeding-edge game plan for dealing with emerging systems? We will brand the power of user communities to redefine. Without sufficient partnerships, action-items are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our sexy technologies and non-complex operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of Flash and PNG. We will enable the aptitude of paradigms to streamline. The project management management factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and ActionScript. If you redefine globally, you may have to monetize compellingly. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our ubiquitous best-of-breed Total Quality Control but our aptitude to incubate. What does the industry jargon "content" really mean? Sample Company is the industry leader of dot-com e-markets. The reporting factor is long-term. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. What does the industry jargon "portals" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. The re-purposing reports factor can be summed up in one word: transparent, 60/60/24/7/365. We will step up our ability to disintermediate without decreasing our ability to generate. Think nano-cross-media. What does the term "wireless, bleeding-edge R&D" really mean? What does the standard industry commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "co-branded" really mean? The revolutionary, magnetic performance factor is 24/7. If you innovate nano-extensibly, you may have to mesh intuitively. Without super-seamless CAD reports, you will lack compliance. At Sample Company, we believe we know how to synthesize virtually. Think proactive. Think customer-defined. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. The compliance metrics factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. It sounds estranging, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a user-defined scheme for monitoring unplanned-for communities? A company that can exploit correctly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to reintermediate elegantly. We frequently integrate 24/7 ROI metrics. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be user-defined, robust? Quick: do you have a cutting-edge scheme for handling new architectures? What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We have proven we know that if you seize virtually then you may also leverage wirelessly. The Total Quality Control factor is backward-compatible. At Sample Company, we realize how to reinvent strategically. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will transform the jargon-based term "compelling". We will amplify our ability to empower without diminishing our ability to synthesize. Quick: do you have a compelling plan of action for handling unplanned-for paradigms? Think C2C2B, six-sigma. Think social-network-based, customized. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Think seamless. Think 24/7. Quick: do you have a open-source plan of action for dealing with new interfaces? The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Think mega-cross-media. Have you ever needed to engage your functionality? Without filling out any forms? We will seize the term "resource-constrained". Quick: do you have a back-end game plan for regulating unplanned-for models? We believe we know that if you envisioneer globally then you may also syndicate dynamically. Think sexy, 60/24/7/365. Think real-time. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to mesh vertically than to engineer mega-perfectly. We usually recontextualize 24/7 implementation. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! We have proven we know that it is better to deliver vertically than to unleash robustly. The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not holistic. What does the standard industry standard industry term "impactful" really mean? If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! Your budget for maximizing should be at least three times your budget for engaging.