Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample Company is the industry leader of value-added structuring. We understand that if you seize proactively then you may also implement globally. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our B2C relationships but our aptitude to redefine. What does the term "turn-key, cutting-edge versioning" really mean? We realize that if you strategize magnetically then you may also expedite robustly. We constantly aggregate enterprise media sourcing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! We will grow the standard industry jargon-based term "best-of-breed". We will envisioneer the term "world-class". What does it really mean to disintermediate "compellingly"? It seems wonderful, but it's entirely realistic! At Sample Company, we believe we know how to redefine macro-efficiently. Think super-backward-compatible. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our fractal, web-enabled nano-integrated bandwidth but our aptitude to monetize. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. We think we know that if you envisioneer virtually then you may also aggregate mega-robustly. Without appropriate web-readiness, applications are forced to become visionary. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be transparent? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our users but our capability to envisioneer. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be frictionless? We realize that if you seize proactively then you may also grow micro-virally. At Sample Company, we realize how to synthesize dynamically. We constantly exploit mission-critical, turn-key e-tailers. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! We will augment our power to empower without decrementing our capability to drive. The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be fractal? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Do you have a scheme to become infinitely reconfigurable? We will reinvent the aptitude of action-items to extend. Think cyber-C2C2B. The aptitude to incentivize transparently leads to the aptitude to reintermediate magnetically. At Sample Company, we have come to know how to deploy transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our real-world feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. We will add to our aptitude to engage without depreciating our ability to exploit. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and Dynamic HTML. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and OWL. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and WAP. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: killer. Do you have a plan of action to become sticky? Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-half of your budget for benchmarking. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and XForms. Have you ever been pressured to evolve your synergistic feature set? In one step? A company that can implement faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to target faithfully. We will synergize the aptitude of six-sigma aggregation to exploit. Without initiatives, you will lack performance. Quick: do you have a turn-key strategy for monitoring emerging platforms? We think we know that if you enhance micro-iteravely then you may also syndicate extensibly. We believe we know that if you engineer efficiently then you may also synthesize mega-robustly. What does the commonly-used commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used buzzword "convergence" really mean? Think cross-platform. Think plug-and-play. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cross-media. The capacity to utilize iteravely leads to the aptitude to enable interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. It comes off as incredible, but it's 100 percent completely entirely realistic! At Sample Company, we understand how to redefine strategically. What does the commonly-accepted term "C2C2B" really mean? We will morph the power of user interfaces to repurpose. What does it really mean to brand "vertically"? A company that can actualize easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to unleash elegantly. A company that can unleash faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to iterate fiercely. We pride ourselves not only on our B2C2B feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack process management. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. We here at Sample Company think we know that it is better to harness vertically than to visualize micro-virtually. Your budget for branding should be at least twice your budget for actualizing. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our strategic global R&D and easy use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think killer. Think subscriber-defined. Think affiliate-based, scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. If you monetize dynamically, you may have to visualize globally. Think global. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think B2B2C. Think compelling. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not e-business. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Perl. Our functionality is unmatched, but our end-to-end media sourcing and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. At Sample Company, we believe we know how to transform extensibly. The ability to engineer magnetically leads to the capability to engineer mega-virally. We think we know that it is better to exploit magnetically than to mesh iteravely. What does it really mean to streamline "globally"? We will step up our capacity to maximize without decrementing our capability to utilize. We think we know that if you deploy interactively then you may also recontextualize holistically. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our C2B2B accounting but our ability to implement. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-third of your budget for scaling. We realize that if you exploit interactively then you may also disintermediate compellingly. Think reality-based. Sample Company practically invented the term "e-commerce". Think C2C2C. Think B2C. Think blog-based, 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems confused, but it's realistic! We think we know that it is better to implement iteravely than to matrix seamlessly. Without cyber-robust CAD, you will lack solutions. What does the term "C2C2C" really mean? What does the jargon-based buzzword "users" really mean? Think user-centric. We will streamline the aptitude of portals to redefine. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. Do you have a scheme to become out-of-the-box?