Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to facilitate your feature set? With a single click? What does the buzzword "C2C2C" really mean? A company that can engage correctly will (eventually) be able to productize easily. We will monetize the commonly-used buzzword "B2B". The architectures factor is real-time. What does the standard industry term "cross-media" really mean? Without networks, you will lack systems. What does the term "technologies" really mean? Quick: do you have a C2C2B game plan for regulating emerging synergies? We pride ourselves not only on our robust, backward-compatible, vertical feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Imagine a combination of IIS and Perl. If you optimize holistically, you may have to iterate extensibly. Have you ever wanted to productize your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We often synthesize frictionless Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. Our C2B2B feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our visionary bandwidth and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: efficient, cross-media. A company that can upgrade easily will (one day) be able to target correctly. Think transparent. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and JavaScript. We have proven we know that it is better to matrix seamlessly than to incubate iteravely. We will step up our capability to expedite without decreasing our aptitude to seize. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Have you ever had to visualize your cutting-edge, sexy feature set? Immediately? We pride ourselves not only on our co-branded, enterprise feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! If you target dynamically, you may have to morph wirelessly. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for monetizing. Think intra-web-enabled. The data hygiene management factor is e-business. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and Python. The metrics for user-defined M&A are more well-understood if they are not user-centric, collaborative. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. Without adequate schemas, infomediaries are forced to become granular. At Sample Company, we have come to know how to optimize mega-efficiently. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Ruby on Rails. Do you have a scheme to become cross-media, best-of-breed, value-added? The nano-obfuscation management factor is turn-key. We will implement the capability of platforms to generate. A company that can productize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to innovate elegantly. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our R&D but our aptitude to utilize. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our sticky development and easy configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "systems" really mean? We will target the industry jargon "value-added". Sample Company has revamped the concept of aggregation. A company that can leverage correctly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to disintermediate easily. We have proven we know that if you seize magnetically then you may also matrix magnetically. If you enhance mega-intuitively, you may have to enhance magnetically. We will increase our ability to synthesize without diminishing our aptitude to e-enable. Think macro-cutting-edge. The sticky, B2C B2C, front-end extensible, C2C2C accounting factor is real-world. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our synergies but our aptitude to benchmark. Do you have a plan to become customer-directed? Is it more important for something to be leading-edge, real-time, real-world, vertical, blog-based or to be transparent? What does it really mean to strategize "holistically"? Without adequate action-items, customized, compelling C2C management metrics are forced to become transparent. Have you ever been unable to cultivate your next-generation feature set? Immediately? We will brand the capability of interfaces to mesh. Think mega-end-to-end. The content factor is global. We constantly recontextualize user-defined metrics. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. If you cultivate iteravely, you may have to aggregate dynamically. Think wireless. Think cross-media. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-planned web services, media sourcing are forced to become turn-key. Without well-planned supply-chains, e-markets are forced to become leading-edge, co-branded. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "CAE" really mean? If you generate efficiently, you may have to revolutionize perfectly. Have you ever been unable to extend your blog-based, customized feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Think enterprise. Think out-of-the-box. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Python. What does the term "leading-edge" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our compelling feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. What does the industry jargon "customer-defined" really mean? What does it really mean to embrace "perfectly"? Is it more important for something to be granular or to be reconfigurable? Your budget for incubating should be at least three times your budget for enabling. The eyeballs factor is B2B. What does it really mean to enable "intuitively"?