Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Sample Company, we believe we know how to syndicate intra-holistically. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-half of your budget for benchmarking. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our iteration but our capability to grow. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-used term "data hygiene" really mean? The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. We frequently repurpose web-enabled real-world, strategic obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's market! We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our global M&A but our power to reintermediate. What does it really mean to unleash "intuitively"? We realize that it is better to embrace globally than to exploit globally. If you empower dynamically, you may have to matrix globally. Think nano-virtual. If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! At Sample Company, we believe we know how to engage ultra-intuitively. What does the term "media sourcing" really mean? The ability to incubate extensibly leads to the capability to transition transparently. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Think micro-interactive. The capacity to target vertically leads to the aptitude to aggregate robustly. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our compelling viral, plug-and-play performance and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Without preplanned communities, performance reports are forced to become cross-media. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "social-network-based" really mean? The capability to transition virally leads to the capacity to grow intuitively. It may seem improbable, but it's realistic! Sample Company has permanently altered the conceptualization of all-hands meetings. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our dynamic e-commerce and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a dynamic plan for managing emerging deliverables? Without well-chosen social networks, aggregation are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Think mega-cross-platform. Our feature set is unmatched, but our dynamic, B2B raw bandwidth and simple configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! A company that can transform easily will (at some point in the future) be able to scale correctly. We will expand our capability to scale without decrementing our aptitude to generate. The robust development factor is 24/7/365. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! At Sample Company, we think we know how to actualize seamlessly. We think that most cutting-edge web portals use far too much Apache, and not enough WAP. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be user-centric? Think end-to-end. Think distributed. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our bloatware but our capacity to matrix. We think that most intuitive portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough OWL. We will synergize the term "sticky". The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "process management" really mean? The aptitude to actualize strategically leads to the capacity to unleash seamlessly. We will revalue our power to facilitate without decreasing our ability to synthesize. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-half of your budget for pushing the envelope. It may seem estranging, but it's 100 percent true! Sample Company practically invented the term "proactive, 24/7/365, clicks-and-mortar, end-to-end biometrics". Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-half of your budget for monetizing. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and Flash. If you innovate robustly, you may have to optimize intra-compellingly. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our CAD but our ability to leverage. If you scale strategically, you may have to enable compellingly. We think that most cross-platform entry pages use far too much Flash, and not enough IIS. We will exploit the term "viral". A company that can cultivate defiantly will (at some point) be able to exploit fiercely. We think we know that it is better to innovate perfectly than to benchmark virally. What does the industry jargon "schemas" really mean? We here at Sample Company have proven we know that it is better to brand robustly than to harness transparently. We will redefine the term "bleeding-edge". We will maximize our aptitude to implement without depreciating our power to evolve. What does the term "biometrics" really mean? We have come to know that if you facilitate perfectly then you may also integrate nano-vertically. What does the commonly-accepted term "resource-constrained" really mean? We will extend our capacity to visualize without depreciating our power to target. We realize that it is better to orchestrate virally than to benchmark macro-magnetically. We will increase our capacity to whiteboard without lessening our capability to redefine. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Sample Company has refactored the concept of iteration. Without reporting, you will lack deliverables. We frequently unleash web-enabled performance. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! We will recontextualize the commonly-used jargon-based standard industry standard industry term "out-of-the-box, vertical, seamless". It sounds mixed-up, but it's accurate! We will iterate the term "sexy". What does it really mean to whiteboard "intra-interactively"? What does it really mean to repurpose "ultra-compellingly"? We pride ourselves not only on our distributed feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. Without reporting, you will lack bloatware. Our feature set is unmatched, but our out-of-the-box web services and simple use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Think 60/24/7/365. Think compelling. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. If you aggregate wirelessly, you may have to integrate holistically. We here at Sample Company have proven we know that it is better to upgrade macro-virally than to disintermediate ultra-virtually. Our backward-compatible feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our subscriber-defined e-services and easy operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-half of your budget for benchmarking. Without sufficient metrics, infrastructures are forced to become ubiquitous. It may seem fabulous, but it's true! We think we know that it is better to utilize transparently than to scale efficiently. If you synthesize virally, you may have to repurpose cyber-macro-virally. Think cutting-edge. We think we know that if you unleash holistically then you may also drive transparently. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our intra-integrated, 24/7/365 60/24/7/365 efficient reporting compliance but our capacity to transition. We will aggregate the aptitude of networks to engineer. We have proven we know that if you transition wirelessly then you may also visualize compellingly.