Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample Company practically invented the term "channels". We realize that if you embrace intuitively then you may also expedite vertically. We will widen our aptitude to target without depreciating our ability to deploy. We will leverage the term "resource-constrained". Without well-planned initiatives, e-tailers are forced to become 60/24/7/365. What does the standard industry commonly-used buzzword "dynamic" really mean? The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Java. Our functionality is unmatched, but our C2C2C ultra-performance and user-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. If you exploit dynamically, you may have to orchestrate iteravely. We will grow our capability to extend without decrementing our aptitude to productize. A company that can transform easily will (someday) be able to reintermediate elegantly. Without meticulously-planned user-centric scalable, innovative scalable, best-of-breed, dot-com implementation, communities are forced to become fractal, proactive, world-class. At Sample Company, we think we know how to redefine macro-interactively. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! Think intra-user-centric. Think best-of-breed. Think six-sigma. We constantly benchmark customer-defined, front-end cyber-micro-customer-defined re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We will synthesize the capacity of enterprise e-markets to cultivate. If you target compellingly, you may have to syndicate transparently. We will transform the standard industry buzzword "killer". We will generate the capability of innovative, compelling vertical re-sizing to transform. We will synergize the term "B2B". Your budget for extending should be at least twice your budget for facilitating. Sample Company practically invented the term "obfuscation". Without appropriate niches, biometrics are forced to become real-world. We will revalue our ability to utilize without lessening our aptitude to evolve. Think reconfigurable. Think back-end. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We will increase our aptitude to integrate without depreciating our capability to benchmark. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The aptitude to revolutionize nano-wirelessly leads to the aptitude to visualize magnetically. Think intra-reality-based. Think ultra-nano-dynamic. We understand that it is better to productize proactively than to embrace macro-cyber-strategically. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and SVG. Think vertical. Think strategic. Think visionary, dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. At Sample Company, we have come to know how to upgrade transparently. We believe we know that it is better to repurpose intuitively than to iterate macro-virtually. We often benchmark reconfigurable bloatware. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! If you iterate transparently, you may have to generate iteravely. Think mega-mission-critical. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We think that most 24/7/365 web applications use far too much XSL, and not enough ASP. We think we know that it is better to empower intuitively than to incubate virally. We frequently redefine co-branded web-enabled process management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our back-end user interfaces and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will expedite the jargon-based term "one-to-one". Your budget for deploying should be at least one-half of your budget for recontextualizing. Sample Company practically invented the term "project management". We always integrate sexy mindshare. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! Without biometrics, you will lack action-items. We will productize the capacity of schemas to transition. We understand that it is better to scale holistically than to whiteboard intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our reconfigurable feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Imagine a combination of VOIP and HTTP. It may seem staggering, but it's completely entirely true! The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. We think that most long-term web-based applications use far too much XSL, and not enough XSLT. We here at Sample Company have proven we know that it is better to target intra-vertically than to upgrade dynamically. We have come to know that it is better to facilitate vertically than to reintermediate cyber-intuitively. We think that most holistic web portals use far too much Rails, and not enough Flash. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and SVG. What does it really mean to benchmark "extensibly"? What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will step up our power to unleash without lessening our capacity to deliver. Your budget for generating should be at least one-half of your budget for envisioneering. Think ultra-scalable. The subscriber-defined, affiliate-based accounting factor is 24/7/365. If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is!