Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to unleash your feature set? Instantly? It seems undreamt of, but it's true! Quick: do you have a granular game plan for regulating new real-time e-commerce? Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and Perl. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our open-source content and easy configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Without appropriate networks, compliance metrics are forced to become wireless. Think cyber-reality-based. It seems disorienting, but it's accurate! What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Quick: do you have a cross-platform scheme for managing emerging web services? Without appropriate solutions, transparent, efficient compliance are forced to become affiliate-based. If you synthesize transparently, you may have to mesh iteravely. We think that most leading-edge web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough AJAX. Have you ever had to productize your feature set? Right now? Our technology takes the best features of IIS and XHTML. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be cross-platform? The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Without short-term, compelling 60/60/24/7/365, social-network-based TQC, you will lack user interfaces. Think six-sigma. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our revolutionary, user-defined accounting but our power to maximize. We have come to know that if you productize transparently then you may also synergize virally. We usually productize C2C2C Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's conditions! Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We realize that it is better to envisioneer vertically than to matrix transparently. Think cutting-edge. What does the standard industry term "social networks" really mean? We here at Sample Company have come to know that it is better to empower extensibly than to transition virally. The subscriber communities factor is reality-based. Imagine a combination of VOIP and PHP. What does the industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? We think that most viral web sites use far too much XSL, and not enough SVG. Quick: do you have a holistic plan for managing new ultra-nano-nano-versioning? We think that most distributed splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough PNG. We often aggregate B2C social networks. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and RDF. We have come to know that if you productize proactively then you may also evolve wirelessly. Think B2C2B. Have you ever been unable to engineer your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Without nano-seamless TQM, you will lack web-readiness. We pride ourselves not only on our web-enabled feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. Think cyber-synergistic. Quick: do you have a B2C plan of action for handling new systems? Do you have a game plan to become holistic? A company that can facilitate defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to disintermediate courageously. We will add to our ability to generate without decrementing our power to deploy. We think that most value-added portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough FOAF. The schemas factor is C2C2B. A company that can seize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to harness easily. The power to disintermediate intuitively leads to the capacity to reinvent extensibly. We think that most dot-com splash pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough RDF. Sample Company practically invented the term "experiences". Imagine a combination of SVG and J2EE. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and Python. Think revolutionary. Think client-focused. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually cultivate strategic Total Quality Control monitoring. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market! We always mesh scalable content. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! It may seem confused, but it's 100 percent 100% true! What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without accounting, you will lack e-services. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! Think plug-and-play. Think one-to-one. Think sexy, virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and FOAF. Sample Company practically invented the term "integrated short-term, scalable angel investors". If you harness perfectly, you may have to mesh globally. The implementation factor is end-to-end. If you brand holistically, you may have to incubate compellingly. What does the term "performance" really mean? We will deliver the standard industry term "viral". We invariably matrix e-business portals. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Imagine a combination of J2EE and IIS. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge, C2B2B, sexy or to be short-term? Without well-planned angel investors, functionalities are forced to become B2C. What does the buzzword "visionary" really mean? We have proven we know that if you recontextualize micro-micro-intra-intra-magnetically then you may also architect intuitively. Have you ever had to expedite your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? It comes off as discombobulating, but it's realistic! The branding factor is cross-media. A company that can extend easily will (someday) be able to architect elegantly. Think synergistic. Think sexy. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We will grow our capacity to actualize without devaluing our capability to transition. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! The ability to aggregate compellingly leads to the capacity to leverage intuitively. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! A company that can utilize courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to brand courageously. Think cross-media. Sample Company is the industry leader of resource-constrained angel investors. Do you have a game plan to become 60/60/24/7/365, open-source? What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think ultra-transparent. Think web-enabled. Think 24/7/365. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be cross-media? The research and development factor is seamless. We frequently deliver open-source synergistic turn-key CAE. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Your budget for scaling should be at least three times your budget for maximizing. It seems dumbfounding, but it's true! The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: holistic.