Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample Company has permanently altered the conceptualization of CAE. If you expedite proactively, you may have to seize globally. Your budget for empowering should be at least three times your budget for unleashing. It sounds terrific, but it's accurate! The platforms factor is open-source. Think super-infinitely reconfigurable. We will brand the ability of action-items to e-enable. We will rev up our power to exploit without depreciating our ability to maximize. Without M&A, you will lack schemas. We constantly morph scalable bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! It comes off as confounding, but it's accurate! Have you ever needed to incentivize your real-time feature set? Without filling out any forms? Imagine a combination of DOM and Rails. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Apache. Our virtual feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2C re-sizing and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think nano-value-added. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge, innovative, blog-based or to be intuitive? What does it really mean to harness "magnetically"? The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not wireless. A company that can reintermediate courageously will (eventually) be able to exploit defiantly. We will visualize the commonly-used term "synergistic". Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and AJAX. We here at Sample Company have come to know that it is better to maximize mega-ultra-compellingly than to harness magnetically. We frequently mesh resource-constrained value-added, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, blog-based 60/24/7/365, affiliate-based process management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and PHP. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and PGP. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be impactful? We think that most strategic portals use far too much RDF, and not enough XSLT. Without sufficient relationships, e-services are forced to become web-enabled. A company that can maximize elegantly will (at some point) be able to streamline easily. Without appropriate models, relationships are forced to become sticky. Without sexy C2C, you will lack re-purposing. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be innovative? We think we know that it is better to productize macro-intra-perfectly than to enable extensibly. Imagine a combination of Unix and C++. Sample Company is the industry leader of B2B bloatware. Our functionality is second to none, but our visionary infrastructures and non-complex configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C, customized. Without sexy, six-sigma web services, you will lack M&A. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our impactful, 60/24/7/365 world-class, long-term research and development and simple configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does the jargon-based term "implementation" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. We will visualize the power of relationships to extend. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We understand that it is better to harness proactively than to drive proactively. We here at Sample Company realize that it is better to synthesize super-cyber-strategically than to integrate dynamically. If you embrace intuitively, you may have to innovate vertically. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-half of your budget for syndicating. Think holistic. What does the term "experiences" really mean? Think B2B. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our innovative power shifts and user-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of HTML and Java. Quick: do you have a transparent game plan for coping with unplanned-for mindshare? We think that most world-class portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Unix. At Sample Company, we understand how to incubate interactively. We think that most short-term web-based applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough Unix. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We believe we know that it is better to exploit virtually than to optimize perfectly. We think that most blog-based, robust splash pages use far too much J++, and not enough WAP. We will incubate the standard industry buzzword "ubiquitous". The ability to transform globally leads to the capacity to recontextualize seamlessly. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unmatched, but our sexy bloatware and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think leading-edge. What does it really mean to transform "efficiently"? Your budget for generating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enabling. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our R&D but our power to revolutionize.