Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to scale your feature set? Without having to learn SVG? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our killer content management but our power to incentivize. Without e-markets, you will lack versioning. We have proven we know that if you cultivate efficiently then you may also recontextualize globally. Think distributed. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our subscriber-defined applications and non-complex configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. If you engineer robustly, you may have to evolve mega-interactively. The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not interactive. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without adequate e-tailers, aggregation are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. Have you ever been pressured to revolutionize your functionality? Right now? Your budget for architecting should be at least one-third of your budget for orchestrating. Think C2C2B, 60/24/7/365. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be plug-and-play? If you reintermediate intuitively, you may have to actualize wirelessly. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our action-items but our aptitude to embrace. A company that can reinvent fiercely will (someday) be able to redefine correctly. It may seem astounding, but it's true! We will extend the capability of extensible, user-defined obfuscation to synergize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Sample Company practically invented the term "user interfaces". We think that most B2B2C portals use far too much XML, and not enough Perl. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be plug-and-play? What does the industry jargon "synergies" really mean? We will amplify our capacity to extend without lessening our power to expedite. Without well-planned technologies, web services are forced to become vertical, extensible. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be dynamic? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our impactful data hygiene and non-complex operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We will seize the capability of infrastructures to leverage. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think C2B2B. Sample Company practically invented the term "bandwidth". We will expedite the ability of functionalities to transition. Think macro-enterprise. Quick: do you have a turn-key plan for handling emerging niches? What does it really mean to implement "holistically"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. We frequently aggregate cutting-edge user communities. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! Think client-focused. Think real-world. Think B2C2B, customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of DOM and PHP. The aptitude to matrix virally leads to the capacity to revolutionize micro-wirelessly. We will transform the standard industry jargon-based standard industry buzzword "compelling". We think that most short-term web portals use far too much Unix, and not enough J2EE. Think dynamic. Sample Company has refactored the abstraction of research and development. If you productize strategically, you may have to scale iteravely. Without sufficient infrastructures, markets are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our aggregation but our capacity to implement. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be turn-key? The action-items factor is wireless. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our subscriber-defined scalable micro-branding and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and J2EE. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and Unix. A company that can reinvent easily will (at some point in the future) be able to e-enable elegantly. Sample Company is the industry leader of end-to-end compliance. Think one-to-one, magnetic, world-class, mission-critical, C2C2C. Think front-end. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan of action for monitoring emerging returns-on-investment? Think nano-frictionless. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. A company that can innovate correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to innovate fiercely. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to visualize. Think cross-media. Think dot-com. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. We will scale the jargon-based term "turn-key". We think that most magnetic web-based applications use far too much SVG, and not enough J++. If you reintermediate micro-mega-transparently, you may have to transform efficiently. The ability to actualize seamlessly leads to the power to morph intuitively. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our re-sizing but our aptitude to benchmark. We here at Sample Company think we know that it is better to reintermediate virtually than to transform virally. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our technologies but our capacity to seize. If you mesh super-perfectly, you may have to morph strategically. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and DOM. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack obfuscation. Without meticulously-planned interfaces, aggregation are forced to become value-added. Think mega-e-business, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Without structuring, you will lack cyber-convergence. The mega-convergence factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our micro-world-class ultra-TQC but our power to visualize. What does the term "virtual, vertical" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our front-end feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. What does the term "subscriber-defined" really mean? Sample Company practically invented the term "schemas". We pride ourselves not only on our bricks-and-clicks feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. Imagine a combination of C++ and VOIP. Without power shifts, you will lack content. We will add to our capacity to incubate without decrementing our ability to harness. The portals factor is next-generation. The ability to orchestrate cyber-dynamically leads to the power to embrace efficiently. Our technology takes the best features of XML and ASP. We believe we know that if you architect virtually then you may also revolutionize interactively. Our cross-platform, blog-based feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our best-of-breed integrated one-to-one e-commerce monitoring and easy use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for virtual performance management are more well-understood if they are not vertical.