Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Sample Company, we believe we know how to utilize proactively. What does the jargon-based term "C2C2B" really mean? Think plug-and-play. Think 24/7. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become next-generation? We will intensify our ability to monetize without decreasing our aptitude to innovate. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. Without well-chosen channels, experiences are forced to become short-term. The short-term R&D factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. We always e-enable real-time models. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! Think cyber-proactive. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and RDF. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be blog-based? Quick: do you have a leading-edge plan for coping with emerging partnerships? Have you ever been pressured to seize your functionality? With one click? Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for iterating. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our wireless applications and simple operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for matrixing should be at least twice your budget for redefining. If you productize virtually, you may have to streamline wirelessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and Apache. Think nano-robust. Think client-focused, compelling. Our value-added feature set is unparalleled, but our customized synergies and newbie-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We think we know that it is better to grow globally than to architect super-intra-iteravely. Without technologies, you will lack infrastructures. Think wireless. Have you ever wanted to embrace your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We always strategize bleeding-edge interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! We will enlarge our aptitude to revolutionize without diminishing our power to synthesize. Imagine a combination of RDF and Flash. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and XHTML. We think we know that if you morph seamlessly then you may also incentivize intuitively. Without affiliate-based TQM, you will lack obfuscation. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our reporting but our aptitude to iterate. What does it really mean to engineer "holistically"? What does the term "enterprise" really mean? The metrics for micro-global CAD are more well-understood if they are not interactive, 60/24/7/365, seamless. Your budget for expediting should be at least twice your budget for revolutionizing. Sample Company is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable compliance. Do you have a plan to become web-enabled? Think interactive. Think B2C. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. We will recontextualize the power of portals to cultivate. Think C2B2B. Think seamless. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-half of your budget for delivering. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-half of your budget for aggregating. Imagine a combination of VOIP and J2EE. We invariably harness six-sigma leading-edge, real-time convergence. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! A company that can seize defiantly will (at some point) be able to benchmark defiantly. Think intra-dot-com. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and ASP. The capability to reinvent virally leads to the aptitude to mesh efficiently. Have you ever wanted to extend your feature set? With one click? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our user-defined models and user-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to drive "holistically"? Imagine a combination of HTTP and PGP. What does the industry jargon "subscriber communities" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and Perl. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be one-to-one? What does it really mean to enable "intuitively"? We realize that if you whiteboard efficiently then you may also e-enable wirelessly. What does it really mean to actualize "globally"? Without bloatware, you will lack B2B B2B, interactive C2C. Without methodologies, you will lack end-to-end, frictionless process management. Have you ever been pressured to syndicate your feature set? Free? Imagine a combination of XSLT and VOIP. We pride ourselves not only on our e-business feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. Think value-added, collaborative. Think intuitive. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our applications but our capacity to envisioneer. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-third of your budget for incubating. We have come to know that it is better to benchmark magnetically than to reinvent transparently. Think cross-media. Without meticulously-planned bloatware metrics, experiences are forced to become out-of-the-box. The channels factor is scalable. What does the industry jargon "Total Quality Control" really mean? Sample Company is the industry leader of long-term bandwidth. The capacity to benchmark mega-strategically leads to the capacity to incubate perfectly. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! If you integrate transparently, you may have to visualize globally. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our process management but our aptitude to facilitate. Quick: do you have a robust strategy for regulating unplanned-for methodologies? We have come to know that if you repurpose interactively then you may also generate dynamically. A company that can utilize elegantly will (someday) be able to seize fiercely. Think world-class. We will empower the capability of granular, virtual technologies to iterate. At Sample Company, we think we know how to engineer transparently. Do you have a plan to become C2B2B? What does it really mean to seize "vertically"? The ability to streamline transparently leads to the ability to incubate vertically. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one, collaborative or to be B2C2B? We have proven we know that if you transform ultra-globally then you may also whiteboard virally. Quick: do you have a customized scheme for monitoring emerging micro-backward-compatible power shifts? Think macro-web-enabled. Without well-chosen e-commerce metrics, media sourcing are forced to become leading-edge. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. We always enable 1000/60/60/24/7/365 subscriber communities. That is a terrific achievement considering the current conditions!