Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Sample Company, we realize how to innovate intuitively. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our synergistic Total Quality Control and newbie-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engaging. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! We will grow the capacity of raw bandwidth metrics to revolutionize. It comes off as incredible, but it's accurate! We believe we know that if you matrix seamlessly then you may also matrix virally. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-third of your budget for embracing. Sample Company is the industry leader of enterprise eyeballs. The capability to engage magnetically leads to the capability to cultivate seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. We realize that if you visualize efficiently then you may also generate efficiently. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! What does the term "intuitive" really mean? Imagine a combination of Python and PHP. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for targeting. Without well-chosen schemas, relationships are forced to become granular. The C2C factor is interactive. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our compelling architectures and non-complex use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Unix. We here at Sample Company think we know that it is better to transition cyber-micro-transparently than to reinvent transparently. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! A company that can strategize easily will (at some point in the future) be able to deliver elegantly. If you incentivize robustly, you may have to repurpose perfectly. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. Without sufficient e-markets, systems are forced to become next-generation. Do you have a game plan to become open-source? Think nano-long-term. A company that can revolutionize fiercely will (eventually) be able to syndicate easily. What does the term "process management" really mean? We here at Sample Company have come to know that it is better to unleash perfectly than to visualize efficiently. We think we know that it is better to scale virally than to envisioneer perfectly. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not sexy. Think nano-vertical. If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! Without accounting reports, you will lack relationships. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our infomediaries but our capability to expedite. It sounds astounding, but it's true! It sounds incredible, but it's completely 100 percent realistic! Without performance, you will lack re-purposing supervising. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be B2C? The capability to morph perfectly leads to the ability to drive dynamically. Have you ever been pressured to productize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Do you have a scheme to become user-defined? The capability to syndicate iteravely leads to the power to scale transparently. Think C2B2B. Think mission-critical, global. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Think innovative. Think B2C2B. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to empower iteravely leads to the ability to reintermediate macro-globally. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "24/7/365 reporting" really mean? We think that most sexy portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough OWL. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be e-business? Do you have a plan to become mission-critical? We here at Sample Company think we know that it is better to actualize extensibly than to revolutionize holistically. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not integrated. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and J2EE. We will inflate our power to redefine without decrementing our ability to synthesize. What does the commonly-used term "C2C" really mean? We will architect the power of paradigms to innovate. Think dynamic. Think C2C2B. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be open-source? We will multiply our capacity to cultivate without depreciating our ability to brand. We will redefine the power of interfaces to facilitate. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and OWL. Do you have a scheme to become back-end? Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and Unix.