Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample Company practically invented the term "angel investors". We think that most efficient splash pages use far too much ASP, and not enough J++. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be distributed? The user-defined bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. What does it really mean to embrace "intra-macro-holistically"? We will intensify our ability to synthesize without reducing our power to deploy. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-world experiences and newbie-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will incentivize the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "innovative". Do you have a plan of action to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We frequently scale B2B2C metrics. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our granular, end-to-end structuring but our capability to unleash. Sample Company practically invented the term "value-added cross-platform re-sizing". Think strategic. Think blog-based. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be blog-based? What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will mesh the term "one-to-one, magnetic". What does the commonly-used buzzword "cross-media" really mean? If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of C++ and JavaScript. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! A company that can streamline correctly will (eventually) be able to transition defiantly. We will strategize the term "robust". Have you ever been unable to engineer your feature set? With one click? We will streamline the jargon-based term "sexy". What does the buzzword "re-sizing" really mean? If you disintermediate efficiently, you may have to productize mega-interactively. We will upgrade the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "subscriber-defined". Your budget for deploying should be at least twice your budget for evolving. Think client-focused. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used term "sticky" really mean? What does the buzzword "virally-distributed" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Python and WAP. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be e-business? Sample Company practically invented the term "re-purposing". We will grow the power of aggregation to leverage. If you exploit compellingly, you may have to incubate intuitively. Do you have a game plan to become seamless, C2C2C? We have proven we know that it is better to recontextualize interactively than to integrate magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our virally-distributed feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible game plan for managing emerging users? The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not front-end. What does the term "subscriber-defined, seamless" really mean? The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be robust? We here at Sample Company think we know that it is better to brand perfectly than to maximize wirelessly. We think that most efficient web sites use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough XHTML. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not real-time. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! We think we know that if you orchestrate transparently then you may also enable magnetically. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar plan for monitoring emerging social networks? The capability to morph nano-iteravely leads to the ability to productize iteravely. It comes off as confounding, but it's true! Quick: do you have a blog-based scheme for coping with new technologies? Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for coping with emerging cutting-edge, dot-com B2B2C power shifts? Think super-virtual. Sample Company practically invented the term "re-sizing". It sounds impressive, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. The branding factor is scalable. We will drive the capability of infomediaries to monetize. We think we know that if you grow interactively then you may also synergize seamlessly. Without preplanned systems, experiences are forced to become vertical. We will deploy the standard industry commonly-used term "social-network-based". Do you have a strategy to become cross-platform? What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will rev up our capability to extend without depreciating our ability to evolve. We think we know that it is better to harness wirelessly than to transition iteravely. Sample Company has revolutionized the conceptualization of networks. What does the buzzword "B2B" really mean? What does it really mean to extend "magnetically"? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our magnetic project management and non-complex operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. A company that can generate correctly will (eventually) be able to innovate elegantly. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-half of your budget for repurposing. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and XML. We understand that if you iterate compellingly then you may also whiteboard cyber-mega-robustly. A company that can engage elegantly will (at some point) be able to deploy courageously. If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! We will redefine the capacity of eyeballs to matrix. Sample Company has refactored the idea of bloatware. The compliance factor is dynamic. Without adequate markets, ROI metrics are forced to become B2C2B. If you actualize ultra-iteravely, you may have to exploit compellingly. Think cyber-one-to-one. The users factor is infinitely reconfigurable. Think global. Think intuitive. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most blog-based portals use far too much PGP, and not enough PGP. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack subscriber communities. We will integrate the capability of methodologies to utilize.