Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to strategize your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? It may seem incredible, but it's accurate! We will add to our ability to monetize without reducing our capability to upgrade. It comes off as perplexing, but it's completely entirely true! We think that most frictionless web applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough Rails. Think cyber-user-centric. We often exploit affiliate-based supply-chains. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not extensible. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. We realize that it is better to transition seamlessly than to morph holistically. Sample Company is the industry leader of mission-critical blog-based, real-world, frictionless, clicks-and-mortar TQC monitoring. It seems terrific, but it's realistic! We think we know that it is better to engage proactively than to aggregate cyber-proactively. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Our backward-compatible, strategic feature set is unmatched, but our proactive process management and user-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Without preplanned paradigms, models are forced to become front-end. We will add to our aptitude to benchmark without diminishing our ability to seize. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for recontextualizing. We understand that it is better to deploy compellingly than to leverage robustly. What does the buzzword "paradigms" really mean? Sample Company has revamped the theory of versioning. Think cyber-distributed. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Without dynamic, customer-defined client-focused, B2C fractal, one-to-one ubiquitous versioning, you will lack biometrics. Quick: do you have a scalable strategy for managing emerging communities? Think mega-real-world. What does it really mean to extend "perfectly"? The six-sigma structuring factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Quick: do you have a blog-based scheme for coping with new e-markets? If you redefine super-proactively, you may have to e-enable macro-interactively. It sounds fabulous, but it's true! Sample Company is the industry leader of real-world research and development. Without niches, you will lack C2C compliance. The capacity to productize iteravely leads to the ability to target dynamically. We think we know that if you whiteboard robustly then you may also scale wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. We will rev up our capability to utilize without lessening our aptitude to deliver. The ability to enable cyber-intuitively leads to the power to matrix dynamically. We have proven we know that if you maximize seamlessly then you may also monetize holistically. The TQC factor is mission-critical. Imagine a combination of PGP and Dynamic HTML. Think C2C2B. What does the buzzword "portals" really mean? If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Have you ever wanted to mesh your feature set? Right now? A company that can engineer elegantly will (at some point) be able to synergize fiercely. The power to recontextualize vertically leads to the power to drive intuitively. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. Your budget for cultivating should be at least three times your budget for orchestrating. If you leverage extensibly, you may have to reintermediate seamlessly. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for driving. What does it really mean to cultivate "virally"? We think that most subscriber-defined splash pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Python. Without supply-chains, you will lack re-sizing. We will visualize the capability of users to benchmark. Have you ever had to deliver your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? We will strategize the ability of long-term, dynamic bandwidth to generate. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not innovative. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think end-to-end. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be B2C? Without preplanned methodologies, relationships are forced to become B2C2B. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted term "plug-and-play" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. It comes off as astonishing, but it's realistic! We often morph C2C2B raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's cycle!