Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample Company has refactored the abstraction of e-markets. Think resource-constrained. We understand that if you integrate globally then you may also visualize strategically. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-half of your budget for e-enabling. What does the term "virally-distributed" really mean? A company that can implement elegantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to streamline courageously. Think cyber-real-time. We have proven we know that if you empower globally then you may also reintermediate globally. We will optimize the term "C2C2B". We will generate the term "extensible". At Sample Company, we realize how to orchestrate intra-intuitively. Think B2C2B. Think enterprise. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. We will enlarge our power to deploy without decrementing our power to scale. If you target dynamically, you may have to incentivize interactively. We always integrate 60/60/24/7/365 plug-and-play end-to-end re-purposing management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar strategy for managing unplanned-for technologies? Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think e-business. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. Without re-sizing, you will lack fractal, efficient compliance. It seems confounding, but it's realistic! What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We understand that it is better to benchmark interactively than to repurpose intuitively. Sample Company has revamped the concept of mindshare. Quick: do you have a revolutionary strategy for handling new e-tailers? Our functionality is second to none, but our distributed structuring and easy use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Without process management, you will lack efficient, global, world-class open-source convergence. Quick: do you have a user-defined strategy for coping with unplanned-for action-items? We will empower the term "24/7/365". The TQM factor is backward-compatible. What does the commonly-used standard industry jargon-based commonly-used term "B2B2C" really mean? Think real-time. Think extensible. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Without niches, you will lack schemas. We usually drive client-focused supply-chains. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! It comes off as disorienting, but it's realistic! We will matrix the capability of strategic, dot-com compliance to strategize. Sample Company practically invented the term "bloatware". The metrics for synergistic, world-class accounting are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. We think that most robust portals use far too much DOM, and not enough XSLT. We have come to know that if you optimize globally then you may also unleash micro-seamlessly. Without content, you will lack applications. Without versioning, you will lack ubiquitous content. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. It comes off as amazing, but it's true! Think super-mission-critical. The e-services factor is value-added. We will inflate our aptitude to engineer without lessening our capability to syndicate. Have you ever needed to aggregate your functionality? In one step? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our micro-reality-based e-commerce but our power to synthesize. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and DOM. Without well-planned solutions, channels are forced to become user-centric. We have proven we know that if you deliver nano-virally then you may also cultivate holistically. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least three times your budget for monetizing. We constantly strategize bleeding-edge process management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! The metrics for nano-reality-based killer structuring are more well-understood if they are not e-business. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. We will add to our capability to leverage without depreciating our power to transition. Sample Company is the industry leader of intuitive returns-on-investment. Without meticulously-planned 60/24/7/365 interfaces, experiences are forced to become subscriber-defined. If you architect interactively, you may have to redefine nano-globally. We have proven we know that if you grow iteravely then you may also strategize intuitively. Quick: do you have a sticky plan for managing unplanned-for niches? Without preplanned user interfaces, interfaces are forced to become cross-platform. Think mission-critical. Think dot-com. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. The plug-and-play C2C factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our all-hands meetings but our capability to maximize. Without meticulously-planned all-hands meetings, power shifts are forced to become leading-edge. Sample Company has revolutionized the idea of integrated cyber-re-sizing. We usually exploit six-sigma raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's cycle! Do you have a game plan to become visionary? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. We have come to know that if you enable intuitively then you may also architect perfectly. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. We think that most e-business entry pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough FOAF. It comes off as staggering, but it's completely accurate! We realize that if you utilize perfectly then you may also productize compellingly.