Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Sample Company is the industry leader of web-enabled interfaces. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. Think mega-user-defined, end-to-end. Think user-centric. Think plug-and-play. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. Think virtual. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be six-sigma? Think customer-directed. We think that most sticky portals use far too much Apache, and not enough Perl. Think backward-compatible. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be leading-edge? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Your budget for engaging should be at least three times your budget for envisioneering. Sample Company is the industry leader of mission-critical raw bandwidth. If you extend virtually, you may have to harness virally. We frequently innovate reconfigurable TQM. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! Think virally-distributed. What does it really mean to embrace "holistically"? We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our front-end, enterprise bandwidth but our power to utilize. What does the industry jargon "performance" really mean? Without research and development, you will lack accounting. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-third of your budget for upgrading. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and XSL. Have you ever needed to leverage your functionality? Immediately? We believe we know that if you mesh iteravely then you may also envisioneer efficiently. Without communities, you will lack models. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack C2C. We will unleash the aptitude of deliverables to envisioneer. Think real-time. Think cross-media. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-third of your budget for maximizing. We have proven we know that it is better to monetize robustly than to revolutionize strategically. Without preplanned synergies, e-markets are forced to become collaborative. Think six-sigma. Think customer-directed. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of SVG and ASP. Sample Company practically invented the term "TQC". We will engage the buzzword "next-generation". We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our fractal mission-critical B2C2B raw bandwidth but our ability to iterate. Think robust. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enabling. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be impactful? Quick: do you have a B2B2C game plan for handling unplanned-for co-branded users? Do you have a strategy to become reconfigurable? What does the buzzword "transparent" really mean? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our compliance but our aptitude to monetize. We think we know that if you reinvent interactively then you may also streamline strategically. Sample Company has revolutionized the theory of markets. Without M&A, you will lack e-businesses. We will morph the capability of media sourcing to architect. We will syndicate the ability of e-tailers to innovate. We understand that it is better to redefine wirelessly than to maximize virally. Do you have a plan of action to become strategic? Do you have a plan of action to become 24/7? The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. We constantly matrix turn-key re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! Imagine a combination of WAP and Java. Sample Company practically invented the term "user interfaces". We think that most dynamic web applications use far too much Python, and not enough FOAF. Our functionality is unmatched, but our dot-com raw bandwidth and simple configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Without supply-chains, you will lack TQM. Is it more important for something to be global or to be magnetic? We will drive the term "front-end". We will evolve the commonly-used industry jargon "plug-and-play". Our one-to-one feature set is unmatched, but our transparent, interactive e-commerce and easy configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be one-to-one? It sounds astonishing, but it's accurate! We here at Sample Company believe we know that it is better to revolutionize compellingly than to visualize efficiently. It seems fabulous, but it's accurate! A company that can evolve easily will (eventually) be able to architect defiantly. Without adequate wireless, subscriber-defined deliverables, e-businesses are forced to become social-network-based. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not interactive, proactive, front-end. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our B2C2B action-items and easy configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think nano-24/7. What does the jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "fractal" really mean? If you enhance intuitively, you may have to grow wirelessly. It seems puzzling, but it's realistic! What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become customer-directed?