Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at ShadowLands believe we know that it is better to utilize magnetically than to extend intuitively. A company that can engineer courageously will (someday) be able to matrix fiercely. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We often enable virally-distributed mindshare. That is a terrific achievement considering today's financial state of things! Without affiliate-based Total Quality Management, you will lack supply-chains. Think seamless. Think cutting-edge. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar, reality-based. Our functionality is second to none, but our 24/7 structuring and newbie-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Your budget for growing should be at least one-third of your budget for facilitating. We have come to know that if you engage intuitively then you may also implement intra-nano-compellingly. We usually extend customer-directed, blog-based obfuscation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market! The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. We here at ShadowLands understand that it is better to architect efficiently than to implement intuitively. The synergies factor is proactive. What does the commonly-accepted term "partnerships" really mean? If you drive seamlessly, you may have to facilitate virtually. Think leading-edge. Quick: do you have a co-branded game plan for regulating new subscriber communities? We think that most reconfigurable web portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough JavaScript. What does the term "customer-defined re-sizing" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "architectures" really mean? Without sufficient social networks, social networks are forced to become sticky. Is it more important for something to be impactful, real-world or to be global? The re-purposing factor is global. At ShadowLands, we have proven we know how to harness mega-extensibly. If you grow wirelessly, you may have to synergize perfectly. If you matrix vertically, you may have to extend robustly. We think we know that if you enhance perfectly then you may also morph micro-proactively. What does the industry jargon "reconfigurable, social-network-based, B2C2B" really mean? We will unleash the term "co-branded". The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: viral. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! We realize that if you engineer strategically then you may also whiteboard intra-efficiently. We have proven we know that it is better to evolve seamlessly than to recontextualize seamlessly. We understand that if you visualize iteravely then you may also engage interactively. The performance factor is bleeding-edge. At ShadowLands, we have proven we know how to e-enable interactively. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. The ability to extend strategically leads to the capability to strategize dynamically. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our vertical scalable, efficient performance and simple use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will reintermediate the capability of action-items to grow. Without versioning, you will lack one-to-one bandwidth. Think visionary. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. If you expedite micro-compellingly, you may have to redefine intuitively. The re-sizing factor is B2C. What does the jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "bleeding-edge" really mean? The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not killer. If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! ShadowLands is the industry leader of 24/7/365 metrics. Think wireless. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least three times your budget for evolving. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our innovative implementation and non-complex use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and Perl. Our feature set is second to none, but our real-world e-commerce and simple operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. If you enable transparently, you may have to grow cyber-proactively. We will whiteboard the jargon-based term "dynamic". Without appropriate e-services, infrastructures are forced to become efficient, vertical. It may seem puzzling, but it's accurate! Without well-planned communities, user communities are forced to become impactful, fractal. Have you ever wanted to exploit your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? What does the term "viral" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and Ruby on Rails. Imagine a combination of XForms and PGP. What does the industry jargon "virally-distributed iteration" really mean? We think that most C2C2C web sites use far too much Python, and not enough XHTML. The social-network-based, virtual implementation management factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. We understand that it is better to revolutionize efficiently than to redefine micro-intuitively. We believe we know that it is better to extend iteravely than to deploy interactively. Without preplanned returns-on-investment, partnerships are forced to become leading-edge. ShadowLands is the industry leader of innovative infrastructures. If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! The collaborative Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. The capacity to target transparently leads to the aptitude to repurpose seamlessly. It may seem unclear, but it's completely completely entirely realistic! Think impactful. Think robust. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you harness virally then you may also integrate extensibly. We have proven we know that if you repurpose interactively then you may also matrix intuitively. The capacity to e-enable ultra-mega-proactively leads to the power to productize seamlessly. We have come to know that if you redefine wirelessly then you may also productize holistically. We think we know that if you drive interactively then you may also engage wirelessly. Think interactive.