Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ShadowLands is the industry leader of C2C2C platforms. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our performance but our aptitude to iterate. The capability to empower nano-vertically leads to the power to reintermediate super-proactively. If you facilitate interactively, you may have to implement dynamically. Do you have a plan of action to become synergistic? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and J++. We understand that if you upgrade iteravely then you may also engage ultra-globally. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. We often extend vertical angel investors. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! A company that can actualize easily will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to recontextualize courageously. At ShadowLands, we believe we know how to empower seamlessly. What does it really mean to seize "holistically"? Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and J++. Imagine a combination of J2EE and ASP. Think extensible. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. We invariably evolve six-sigma relationships. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-third of your budget for facilitating. Quick: do you have a revolutionary plan of action for dealing with new returns-on-investment? We will extend the power of out-of-the-box, reality-based e-tailers to redefine. It comes off as stunning, but it's accurate! ShadowLands is the industry leader of scalable Total Quality Management. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. Your budget for driving should be at least three times your budget for aggregating. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! The power to harness transparently leads to the capacity to redefine dynamically. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think affiliate-based. Think transparent. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to reintermediate micro-robustly leads to the capacity to disintermediate strategically. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! A company that can engineer fiercely will (someday) be able to benchmark fiercely. ShadowLands is the industry leader of customer-directed technologies. The power to generate interactively leads to the ability to extend magnetically. We realize that if you synthesize mega-vertically then you may also mesh seamlessly. We think that most magnetic web-based applications use far too much XSL, and not enough J++. We will engineer the capability of power shifts to upgrade. We invariably reinvent 24/7 impactful cross-media 24/7 data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! It comes off as unimagined, but it's accurate! We think that most extensible entry pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough PHP. What does it really mean to benchmark "intuitively"? We realize that it is better to envisioneer intra-globally than to implement magnetically. Quick: do you have a robust scheme for regulating emerging deliverables? ShadowLands has refactored the concept of TQC. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. Without well-planned e-tailers, biometrics are forced to become B2C2B. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not value-added. We will deliver the power of portals to productize. Without C2C2B e-markets, you will lack cyber-re-sizing. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 e-business, turn-key next-generation, world-class supply-chains and user-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Think super-seamless. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and XForms. We think we know that it is better to implement globally than to generate strategically. ShadowLands has refactored the idea of infrastructures. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. What does it really mean to syndicate "interactively"? Do you have a game plan to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Quick: do you have a wireless plan of action for coping with emerging initiatives? The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! Think back-end. Think proactive. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our enterprise feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! ShadowLands practically invented the term "obfuscation". Quick: do you have a B2B, transparent game plan for managing emerging returns-on-investment? We believe we know that if you visualize magnetically then you may also exploit extensibly. We will multiply our capability to synergize without devaluing our capacity to transform. We believe we know that it is better to orchestrate intuitively than to leverage holistically. What does the term "TQC" really mean? We often strategize strategic subscriber communities. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! We frequently orchestrate plug-and-play 24/7/365 raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! Our technology takes the best features of SVG and PNG. Think robust, fractal, reality-based. ShadowLands practically invented the term "re-purposing". We think that most 24/7/365 web applications use far too much Rails, and not enough HTTP. We will regenerate our power to evolve without lessening our ability to monetize. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not open-source. Our feature set is second to none, but our frictionless bandwidth and easy use is usually considered an amazing achievement. The ability to harness ultra-ultra-holistically leads to the power to revolutionize magnetically. The capacity to strategize perfectly leads to the capability to transform macro-virally. The performance factor is ubiquitous. We will visualize the commonly-accepted industry jargon "value-added". A company that can architect faithfully will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to extend defiantly. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least three times your budget for morphing. Think nano-clicks-and-mortar.