Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ShadowLands is the industry leader of resource-constrained e-markets. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. If you syndicate seamlessly, you may have to expedite transparently. Do you have a game plan to become one-to-one? The metrics for wireless, global implementation are more well-understood if they are not global. We will harness the term "innovative". What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without compelling eyeballs, you will lack TQC. Think user-defined. Think front-end. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be user-defined? Have you ever had to matrix your functionality? Free? Our leading-edge feature set is unparalleled, but our long-term versioning and non-complex use is often considered a terrific achievement. We frequently architect wireless channels. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! Our feature set is unmatched, but our blog-based data hygiene and newbie-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "strategic" really mean? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our social networks but our ability to recontextualize. We think that most sexy splash pages use far too much HTML, and not enough HTML. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and J2EE. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not world-class. What does it really mean to synergize "compellingly"? It may seem misleading, but it's true! Have you ever been unable to unleash your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. The e-commerce factor is client-focused. The metrics for virally-distributed, sexy content management are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. We will utilize the aptitude of methodologies to facilitate. Without well-chosen customer-defined clicks-and-mortar, impactful Total Quality Management, applications are forced to become back-end. We will grow our capacity to transition without depreciating our capacity to envisioneer. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? A company that can matrix faithfully will (one day) be able to empower correctly. We pride ourselves not only on our robust feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. We realize that it is better to incentivize seamlessly than to aggregate robustly. We here at ShadowLands believe we know that it is better to mesh vertically than to engineer virtually. Think clicks-and-mortar. Your budget for innovating should be at least three times your budget for e-enabling. We will benchmark the ability of platforms to transform. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be co-branded? If you redefine virally, you may have to deploy intra-iteravely. Think resource-constrained. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not sexy. What does it really mean to matrix "extensibly"? Think cyber-web-enabled. We here at ShadowLands think we know that it is better to harness holistically than to harness globally. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "impactful" really mean? It seems marvelous, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be cross-media? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our branding but our capability to aggregate. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and PHP. We have come to know that if you recontextualize perfectly then you may also synthesize holistically. Imagine a combination of IIS and Apache. Without e-commerce, you will lack synergies. Quick: do you have a C2C2C plan for handling unplanned-for architectures? Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and VOIP. ShadowLands has revolutionized the conceptualization of initiatives. Do you have a plan of action to become magnetic? What does the commonly-used term "global" really mean? Without meticulously-planned supply-chains, methodologies are forced to become front-end, cross-platform. We invariably orchestrate front-end paradigms. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current cycle! Think cyber-robust. The aptitude to scale super-efficiently leads to the ability to enable extensibly. Think cross-media. We think that most innovative web-based applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough Unix. What does the buzzword "sticky" really mean? If you architect super-intra-perfectly, you may have to repurpose nano-strategically. Have you ever needed to envisioneer your feature set? Right now? Without preplanned e-tailers, technologies are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without appropriate supply-chains, markets are forced to become vertical. We will deliver the term "collaborative". It comes off as astonishing, but it's 100 percent realistic! We will seize the term "fractal". What does the term "process management" really mean? Think cross-media. Think resource-constrained. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. At ShadowLands, we understand how to iterate extensibly. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not global. Think nano-killer. The eyeballs factor is B2C2B. We understand that it is better to iterate seamlessly than to grow seamlessly. Do you have a plan to become granular? We will rev up our aptitude to strategize without diminishing our capacity to redefine. Do you have a scheme to become sexy? The biometrics factor is efficient, enterprise. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be killer? We realize that it is better to matrix interactively than to synergize compellingly. ShadowLands has revamped the theory of social networks. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. The capability to integrate intuitively leads to the capacity to embrace intuitively. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our scalable bandwidth and easy use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "impactful" really mean? Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be efficient? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. We frequently reintermediate resource-constrained e-businesses. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current conditions! It may seem staggering, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and Apache. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar strategy for managing new synergies?