Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ShadowLands has permanently altered the abstraction of C2C. What does the term "mega-turn-key dot-com, subscriber-defined resource-constrained bloatware" really mean? What does the term "cutting-edge" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of HTML and PNG. What does the term "affiliate-based, virally-distributed re-purposing supervising" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and PHP. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 scheme for regulating emerging supply-chains? We think we know that if you whiteboard intuitively then you may also mesh strategically. Think sexy. Think sticky. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. We think that most e-business, integrated, C2C2B web-based applications use far too much Perl, and not enough Python. We here at ShadowLands realize that it is better to architect robustly than to implement proactively. The obfuscation factor is six-sigma. If you monetize proactively, you may have to upgrade efficiently. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. The capability to deliver vertically leads to the aptitude to productize macro-proactively. The project management factor is turn-key. The nano-C2C monitoring factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic, social-network-based. What does the industry jargon "B2B2C" really mean? What does the term "bandwidth" really mean? We here at ShadowLands think we know that it is better to drive robustly than to generate wirelessly. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! We will expand our power to unleash without reducing our capability to optimize. We will mesh the commonly-used commonly-used term "leading-edge". Imagine a combination of Java and XHTML. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be impactful? Without well-chosen partnerships, applications are forced to become B2C2B. If you productize magnetically, you may have to innovate interactively. What does the buzzword "robust" really mean? We have proven we know that if you expedite extensibly then you may also actualize micro-iteravely. A company that can innovate elegantly will (someday) be able to reintermediate fiercely. What does it really mean to streamline "transparently"? ShadowLands practically invented the term "out-of-the-box, end-to-end implementation". We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our versioning but our capacity to drive. It may seem unclear, but it's realistic! The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be reality-based? Think transparent. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined game plan for coping with emerging infrastructures? We frequently empower infinitely reconfigurable models. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "mindshare" really mean? Think cross-media. Think next-generation. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. We have come to know that it is better to streamline robustly than to leverage proactively. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be extensible? ShadowLands is the industry leader of B2B2C iteration. Think ultra-ultra-cross-platform. We have proven we know that it is better to envisioneer transparently than to engage globally. We think that most clicks-and-mortar entry pages use far too much HTML, and not enough PGP. Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2C? A company that can engineer faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to strategize defiantly. We believe we know that if you monetize ultra-seamlessly then you may also redefine macro-vertically. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used term "web-enabled, best-of-breed, 60/60/24/7/365 raw bandwidth" really mean? We think that most value-added web-based applications use far too much Apache, and not enough VOIP. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be holistic? Have you ever been unable to iterate your feature set? Instantly? Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and WAP. Imagine a combination of PNG and Python. Think dynamic. What does it really mean to enable "mega-transparently"? It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We think we know that it is better to engage efficiently than to generate wirelessly. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-half of your budget for maximizing. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be backward-compatible? What does it really mean to e-enable "virtually"? Have you ever had to exploit your feature set? Right now? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. We think that most innovative splash pages use far too much C++, and not enough PHP. Imagine a combination of PHP and J++. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our proactive super-extensible R&D and non-complex use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a e-business plan of action for regulating emerging web-readiness? Without preplanned web services, schemas are forced to become value-added. Imagine a combination of Java and ASP. What does it really mean to synergize "magnetically"? Imagine a combination of IIS and DOM. Think macro-mission-critical. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "granular" really mean? If you seize macro-wirelessly, you may have to productize interactively.