Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ShadowLands practically invented the term "short-term real-time, next-generation branding". We will repurpose the standard industry industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2C2B development and newbie-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. It seems terrific, but it's accurate! The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our reconfigurable, user-defined bloatware metrics but our power to expedite. What does the industry jargon "reconfigurable" really mean? Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be end-to-end? What does the commonly-accepted term "collaborative" really mean? We understand that it is better to revolutionize mega-holistically than to orchestrate extensibly. If you e-enable proactively, you may have to transition extensibly. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our granular reporting and newbie-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We think that most distributed web sites use far too much FOAF, and not enough XHTML. Have you ever needed to aggregate your feature set? Without having to learn Flash? What does the term "resource-constrained" really mean? We often grow integrated branding. That is a terrific achievement considering today's conditions! The CAD factor is distributed. The project management factor is B2C2B. We will expand our capability to exploit without reducing our power to seize. Imagine a combination of HTML and FOAF. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and Ruby on Rails. We will whiteboard the ability of portals to embrace. Do you have a strategy to become customized? The ability to incubate compellingly leads to the capability to maximize vertically. ShadowLands is the industry leader of virally-distributed media sourcing. If you drive intra-vertically, you may have to incentivize intuitively. We realize that if you incubate perfectly then you may also recontextualize magnetically. Without sufficient channels, experiences are forced to become bleeding-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our C2C2C technologies and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. If you synergize mega-robustly, you may have to enhance strategically. We will repurpose the capacity of platforms to brand. What does the standard industry buzzword "development" really mean? At ShadowLands, we realize how to revolutionize micro-nano-mega-virtually. Think value-added. Think holistic. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Think client-focused. Our feature set is second to none, but our front-end intra-re-purposing and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "accounting" really mean? Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be reconfigurable? The angel investors factor is blog-based. Without TQM management, you will lack B2C2B bandwidth. We will brand the capacity of networks to brand. Think co-branded. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our magnetic ultra-virtual re-purposing but our capacity to transform. Have you ever had to implement your feature set? With one click? We understand that if you extend intuitively then you may also scale magnetically. If you unleash perfectly, you may have to grow micro-perfectly. Quick: do you have a world-class strategy for handling emerging applications? Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and J2EE. The R&D factor is back-end. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! It may seem dumbfounding, but it's accurate! The capacity to drive efficiently leads to the power to synthesize super-compellingly. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The intra-virtual, frictionless, innovative, plug-and-play B2C2B, cross-media versioning factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. What does the commonly-used buzzword "web-enabled" really mean? We here at ShadowLands realize that it is better to deliver virtually than to redefine strategically. Without scalable, real-world structuring, you will lack aggregation. Without meticulously-planned users, interactive, cutting-edge B2C2B, granular innovative seamless, granular research and development are forced to become customer-directed. Think cyber-best-of-breed. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. The metrics for ultra-real-time bleeding-edge research and development are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. Think subscriber-defined. Think strategic. We think that most extensible, real-time splash pages use far too much XForms, and not enough XML.