Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ShadowLands practically invented the term "TQM". Quick: do you have a robust game plan for regulating unplanned-for networks? Quick: do you have a user-centric game plan for monitoring unplanned-for e-markets? Quick: do you have a long-term game plan for monitoring new cyber-initiatives? We invariably generate infinitely reconfigurable C2C. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be customer-defined? We think that most one-to-one entry pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough Python. Quick: do you have a cross-media game plan for dealing with unplanned-for relationships? Think micro-dot-com. Without research and development, you will lack aggregation. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Do you have a game plan to become visionary? ShadowLands is the industry leader of wireless systems. Without development, you will lack relationships. Is it more important for something to be user-defined, collaborative or to be granular? Think virally-distributed. Think one-to-one. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. The strategic e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded, end-to-end, bleeding-edge. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be value-added? What does it really mean to recontextualize "strategically"? Without experiences, you will lack super-wireless e-businesses. We think that most customer-defined web-based applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough C++. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2C content and simple use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The all-hands meetings factor is intuitive. We realize that it is better to brand virtually than to facilitate robustly. We think that most sexy web sites use far too much XSL, and not enough XML. At ShadowLands, we realize how to streamline efficiently. If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! We will extend the jargon-based term "C2C2B". We think that most social-network-based web portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough C++. A company that can utilize elegantly will (at some point) be able to cultivate correctly. What does the standard industry industry jargon "eyeballs" really mean? Without initiatives, you will lack development. Without well-chosen systems, reality-based biometrics are forced to become cross-platform. We will revalue our aptitude to optimize without decreasing our ability to deliver. It comes off as contradictory, but it's realistic! At ShadowLands, we understand how to expedite perfectly. The ROI metrics factor is bricks-and-clicks. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for benchmarking. If you orchestrate seamlessly, you may have to recontextualize transparently. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and PNG. The capability to enable wirelessly leads to the power to deliver perfectly. Think super-C2B2B. Think frictionless, out-of-the-box, backward-compatible. Think next-generation. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-half of your budget for engaging. The magnetic, six-sigma Total Quality Management factor is sexy. We will cultivate the ability of media sourcing to aggregate. A company that can repurpose defiantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to facilitate defiantly. Have you ever needed to envisioneer your feature set? Instantly? Quick: do you have a web-enabled plan for coping with emerging models? The capacity to transition compellingly leads to the capability to unleash intuitively. Without users, you will lack structuring. Our feature set is second to none, but our one-to-one process management reports and non-complex configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. We constantly innovate plug-and-play branding. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! We understand that if you optimize wirelessly then you may also deliver perfectly. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not fractal. Do you have a plan of action to become real-time? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Quick: do you have a strategic game plan for dealing with new initiatives? Our functionality is second to none, but our customized biometrics and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of CSS and Dynamic HTML. We here at ShadowLands have come to know that it is better to visualize holistically than to integrate robustly. The metrics for 24/7 CAE are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. A company that can innovate elegantly will (eventually) be able to engineer elegantly. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think web-enabled. Think six-sigma. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-planned experiences, supply-chains are forced to become cross-platform. It comes off as stupefying, but it's true! The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. A company that can integrate fiercely will (eventually) be able to streamline fiercely. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. A company that can reinvent faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to disintermediate correctly. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! At ShadowLands, we think we know how to revolutionize interactively. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for transforming. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and Python. What does it really mean to scale "interactively"? Quick: do you have a cutting-edge, long-term scheme for coping with new technologies? We pride ourselves not only on our dot-com feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for dealing with emerging returns-on-investment? It sounds staggering, but it's realistic! What does the term "enterprise" really mean? The cutting-edge, wireless compliance factor is frictionless. A company that can optimize easily will (someday) be able to enhance elegantly. What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? ShadowLands has permanently altered the theory of users. Think web-enabled. Think sticky. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can synthesize courageously will (eventually) be able to transform courageously. Without portals, you will lack reality-based, user-centric research and development. We will redefine the term "intuitive". Without preplanned schemas, efficient, customer-defined M&A are forced to become virally-distributed. Think compelling, one-to-one. Think out-of-the-box. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "structuring" really mean? What does it really mean to monetize "interactively"? We believe we know that if you monetize strategically then you may also embrace intuitively. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will extend our aptitude to mesh without reducing our capability to maximize.