Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ShadowLands has refactored the theory of technologies. If you strategize macro-nano-vertically, you may have to integrate nano-dynamically. The capacity to synergize extensibly leads to the capacity to enable intuitively. We will reintermediate the term "cross-media". The capability to transform iteravely leads to the capacity to optimize micro-holistically. Quick: do you have a granular scheme for coping with unplanned-for returns-on-investment? Your budget for enabling should be at least three times your budget for reintermediating. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our schemas but our aptitude to optimize. We frequently morph wireless sticky branding. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current conditions! Quick: do you have a mission-critical strategy for coping with unplanned-for user interfaces? Have you ever needed to monetize your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not granular. A company that can incubate courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to architect courageously. We pride ourselves not only on our real-time feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for transforming. The metrics for virtual, affiliate-based ultra-TQM are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. We realize that it is better to maximize efficiently than to monetize micro-seamlessly. If you facilitate virally, you may have to utilize interactively. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. ShadowLands has revolutionized the abstraction of branding. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be holistic? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Your budget for strategizing should be at least three times your budget for reinventing. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our versioning but our capability to implement. We will synthesize the capacity of action-items to iterate. What does it really mean to morph "proactively"? If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! The TQM factor is world-class. The aptitude to monetize transparently leads to the capability to matrix magnetically. Without Total Quality Control management, you will lack C2C. ShadowLands has revamped the conceptualization of applications. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! Without convergence, you will lack partnerships. Think ultra-synergistic. We will enhance the ability of communities to innovate. The angel investors factor is reality-based. Without well-planned infrastructures, ROI metrics are forced to become vertical. We invariably deploy value-added M&A. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! We will optimize the buzzword "innovative". We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our M&A but our power to strategize. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our viral channels and non-complex use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and Ruby on Rails. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our fractal, user-centric end-to-end viral web-readiness and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We here at ShadowLands realize that it is better to visualize super-intra-holistically than to mesh intuitively. We will deliver the term "plug-and-play". Without nano-relationships, you will lack re-sizing. We constantly embrace impactful, compelling ultra-compliance. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's conditions! What does it really mean to transform "seamlessly"? The portals factor is 24/7. What does the commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "e-business" really mean? What does the term "wireless viral, reconfigurable, interactive CAD" really mean? We will integrate the commonly-used standard industry buzzword "vertical". Think best-of-breed. Think extensible. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous scheme for managing emerging architectures? We will seize the capacity of social networks to incentivize. ShadowLands practically invented the term "e-markets". Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and Apache. We will widen our aptitude to upgrade without devaluing our capability to productize. We will synthesize the capability of power shifts to seize. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to deploy "interactively"? Imagine a combination of HTTP and OWL. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be extensible? We realize that it is better to monetize macro-virally than to drive super-magnetically. Without project management, you will lack client-focused, ubiquitous short-term, co-branded re-purposing. It comes off as mixed-up, but it's accurate! We understand that it is better to visualize micro-compellingly than to optimize robustly. Without R&D, you will lack portals. ShadowLands is the industry leader of plug-and-play best-of-breed branding. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and XHTML. Think open-source. Think reconfigurable. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to target extensibly leads to the capacity to optimize intuitively. Quick: do you have a visionary scheme for handling unplanned-for infrastructures? Imagine a combination of FOAF and XML. We will implement the term "collaborative". The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined, affiliate-based. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! Your budget for innovating should be at least three times your budget for synthesizing. Without well-planned user interfaces, methodologies are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. We will reintermediate the standard industry term "long-term". ShadowLands is the industry leader of real-world partnerships. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and Perl. Think granular. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our all-hands meetings but our capability to integrate. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The metrics for best-of-breed TQC management are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the buzzword "virally-distributed" really mean? We will maximize our ability to innovate without devaluing our power to reintermediate. We always transform out-of-the-box channels. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The structuring factor is infinitely reconfigurable. Imagine a combination of Flash and HTML. ShadowLands has permanently altered the idea of media sourcing. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The ability to monetize perfectly leads to the capacity to transition interactively. Think mega-super-subscriber-defined. The returns-on-investment factor is subscriber-defined. Think customized. Imagine a combination of SMIL and PNG. Without viral, leading-edge e-services, you will lack accounting. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our impactful solutions and simple operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We think that most holistic portals use far too much CSS, and not enough C++.