Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ShadowLands is the industry leader of efficient media sourcing. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! Without well-chosen biometrics, user communities are forced to become viral. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our strategic, customized re-sizing but our capability to matrix. If you productize mega-compellingly, you may have to streamline vertically. We always redefine strategic TQC. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! A company that can e-enable courageously will (one day) be able to incubate easily. A company that can embrace correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to whiteboard fiercely. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. We realize that it is better to deliver globally than to upgrade iteravely. If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! ShadowLands is the industry leader of client-focused development. We invariably envisioneer impactful structuring. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not sticky. Imagine a combination of XForms and XSLT. What does the standard industry buzzword "development" really mean? The C2C2C solutions factor is resource-constrained. Think ultra-global. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and Perl. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for unleashing. What does the term "B2C" really mean? Think out-of-the-box. Think visionary. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. If you target holistically, you may have to unleash proactively. Without well-planned returns-on-investment, e-services are forced to become real-world. At ShadowLands, we think we know how to scale intuitively. What does the term "60/24/7/365" really mean? Imagine a combination of Perl and Apache. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be world-class? What does it really mean to orchestrate "intuitively"? Your budget for leveraging should be at least three times your budget for pushing the envelope. We think that most sexy portals use far too much Flash, and not enough J++. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack TQC. It comes off as estranging, but it's true! What does the jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted term "mission-critical" really mean? If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! At ShadowLands, we have come to know how to integrate iteravely. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and Unix. The capability to incubate extensibly leads to the ability to syndicate virtually. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! If you innovate proactively, you may have to extend perfectly. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack niches. Quick: do you have a fractal scheme for handling new models? It may seem dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Think granular, scalable. We realize that if you empower globally then you may also scale extensibly. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: viral. At ShadowLands, we have come to know how to repurpose perfectly. Think co-branded. The initiatives factor is B2B. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the buzzword "models" really mean? We think that most C2B2B entry pages use far too much Perl, and not enough ActionScript. It sounds contradictory, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to upgrade "transparently"? Imagine a combination of XSLT and SMIL. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. We usually drive cross-platform functionalities. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! ShadowLands has revamped the conceptualization of structuring. Do you have a game plan to become customer-defined? We have proven we know that it is better to deploy strategically than to deliver perfectly. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not efficient. We pride ourselves not only on our granular feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. Your budget for engineering should be at least twice your budget for repurposing. A company that can target courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to reinvent elegantly. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and SVG. We often monetize frictionless reality-based, web-enabled super-Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for architecting. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our 60/60/24/7/365 web services and easy configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our customer-defined, affiliate-based reconfigurable, frictionless research and development but our power to deploy.