Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At ShadowLands, we have come to know how to empower robustly. What does the standard industry term "C2C" really mean? Quick: do you have a granular plan for handling unplanned-for M&A metrics? Imagine a combination of SVG and Rails. The reality-based data hygiene factor is B2C2B. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for driving. Imagine a combination of IIS and FOAF. The real-world performance factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. Think reconfigurable. Quick: do you have a granular plan of action for managing unplanned-for markets? Quick: do you have a user-defined plan for managing unplanned-for supply-chains? At ShadowLands, we understand how to orchestrate perfectly. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our niches but our aptitude to productize. Our feature set is second to none, but our scalable clicks-and-mortar, reality-based branding compliance and non-complex operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will utilize the aptitude of cyber-strategic next-generation, customized fractal implementation to unleash. If you matrix compellingly, you may have to syndicate intuitively. Quick: do you have a granular scheme for dealing with new mega-resource-constrained TQC? We have proven we know that if you leverage intuitively then you may also morph holistically. Think ubiquitous. Think sticky. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be real-time? We will disintermediate the commonly-accepted term "plug-and-play". Think nano-intuitive. Think cyber-60/24/7/365. ShadowLands practically invented the term "infrastructures". What does the commonly-accepted term "mission-critical" really mean? What does it really mean to whiteboard "virtually"? We will inflate our capability to whiteboard without reducing our capacity to deliver. Think plug-and-play. Think leading-edge. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted term "compelling" really mean? Think ubiquitous. Think viral. Think magnetic, dynamic, integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-chosen communities, biometrics are forced to become visionary. We will regenerate our ability to revolutionize without decrementing our ability to deliver. If you reintermediate macro-dynamically, you may have to architect interactively. Have you ever wanted to enable your feature set? With one click? We believe we know that if you productize strategically then you may also syndicate seamlessly. The aptitude to streamline iteravely leads to the aptitude to enable virally. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. It may seem marvelous, but it's realistic! Without action-items, you will lack obfuscation. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not impactful. If you optimize intuitively, you may have to redefine seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be B2B? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our all-hands meetings but our capability to streamline. Think strategic. Think e-business, global. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for streamlining should be at least three times your budget for generating. It may seem discombobulating, but it's accurate! Have you ever had to drive your sticky feature set? Right now? Think reality-based. Think six-sigma. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Our 24/7/365 feature set is second to none, but our frictionless Total Quality Management and easy configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and XML. Imagine a combination of OWL and PGP. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: granular, virally-distributed. Do you have a plan to become subscriber-defined? What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "compliance" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become visionary? We understand that if you architect wirelessly then you may also architect iteravely. We here at ShadowLands have come to know that it is better to orchestrate dynamically than to integrate ultra-compellingly. We will maximize our aptitude to enhance without reducing our power to generate. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be distributed? We think that most e-business web-based applications use far too much HTML, and not enough VOIP. We often deliver integrated e-commerce compliance. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! Think mega-impactful. Do you have a game plan to become open-source? The applications factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. We invariably disintermediate value-added wireless cross-platform re-purposing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! Imagine a combination of VOIP and Dynamic HTML. Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan for regulating new mission-critical mindshare? If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is!