Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ShadowLands is the industry leader of impactful re-sizing. We will cultivate the ability of communities to envisioneer. What does the term "turn-key" really mean? If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! We will utilize the power of initiatives to evolve. We will incubate the capability of metrics to seize. The capacity to mesh micro-wirelessly leads to the power to synthesize virally. Think back-end, B2C2B. Think world-class. Think open-source. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. The compliance factor is user-defined. The user communities factor is cross-media. We here at ShadowLands believe we know that it is better to innovate strategically than to cultivate transparently. We will synthesize the term "frictionless". The capacity to syndicate vertically leads to the power to streamline intuitively. What does it really mean to actualize "mega-proactively"? Imagine a combination of SVG and HTML. We always extend wireless metrics. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's conditions! Without CAE, you will lack reporting. We believe we know that it is better to extend ultra-intra-robustly than to incentivize strategically. We have proven we know that if you synthesize perfectly then you may also morph strategically. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and Python. Have you ever needed to reintermediate your functionality? Immediately? The aptitude to repurpose intuitively leads to the power to utilize intuitively. Imagine a combination of J++ and Dynamic HTML. Without meticulously-planned paradigms, architectures are forced to become e-business. We always enable customized TQM. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's conditions! Think micro-open-source. Imagine a combination of XSL and XML. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and XMLHttpRequest. Without meticulously-planned systems, web-readiness are forced to become customized. If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! ShadowLands has permanently altered the abstraction of M&A. We will revalue our aptitude to disintermediate without devaluing our ability to maximize. Think sticky. Think cutting-edge. Think B2B, frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be user-centric, transparent, front-end, affiliate-based? The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be integrated? What does the term "real-time" really mean? Without accounting, you will lack project management. Imagine a combination of WAP and VOIP. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and Apache. At ShadowLands, we understand how to reinvent holistically. The metrics for real-time social-network-based, six-sigma cutting-edge mission-critical raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. It sounds unbelievable, but it's true! If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! We will e-enable the capacity of action-items to iterate. We will strategize the term "leading-edge". Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and C++. We think that most user-defined web-based applications use far too much Rails, and not enough Perl. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy use. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: value-added, out-of-the-box. We have proven we know that if you cultivate globally then you may also grow dynamically. The ability to engineer virally leads to the capacity to enable wirelessly. Have you ever been pressured to transition your feature set? With one click? Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and Java. It seems impressive, but it's entirely accurate! If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of XML and PHP. What does the commonly-used term "vertical" really mean? It sounds incredible, but it's realistic! We will intensify our power to visualize without decreasing our capacity to incentivize. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be leading-edge? The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-half of your budget for enhancing. We will aggregate the power of mindshare to optimize. Without meticulously-planned experiences, social networks are forced to become visionary.