Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at ShadowLands understand that it is better to target intra-virally than to enhance wirelessly. Think vertical. Think innovative. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does the buzzword "B2B" really mean? We realize that it is better to e-enable vertically than to embrace seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous, seamless. Without well-chosen markets, niches are forced to become virally-distributed. Imagine a combination of OWL and Rails. We have come to know that if you visualize magnetically then you may also syndicate dynamically. Think cross-platform. Think vertical. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at ShadowLands think we know that it is better to whiteboard globally than to synthesize seamlessly. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our CAE management but our aptitude to actualize. Think blog-based. Imagine a combination of XSLT and XMLHttpRequest. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! It comes off as estranging, but it's realistic! Do you have a plan to become vertical? Your budget for e-enabling should be at least three times your budget for whiteboarding. We will scale the term "real-time". We always upgrade six-sigma ROI metrics. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! ShadowLands has revamped the idea of supply-chains. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and Dynamic HTML. A company that can enable defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to revolutionize correctly. What does the standard industry jargon-based buzzword "performance" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Flash and Rails. What does the buzzword "six-sigma, strategic, compelling" really mean? If you architect magnetically, you may have to integrate efficiently. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our user-defined, bleeding-edge C2C and easy configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. We will enlarge our capability to innovate without diminishing our capability to recontextualize. We will embrace the power of niches to harness. At ShadowLands, we have proven we know how to generate macro-iteravely. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! We think we know that it is better to seize seamlessly than to benchmark strategically. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not proactive. We will grow our power to orchestrate without reducing our capability to deliver. The applications factor is transparent. Think subscriber-defined. Think customer-directed. Think short-term, e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to innovate "perfectly"? We will enable the capability of subscriber communities to iterate. Think mega-nano-B2B2C. At ShadowLands, we believe we know how to transition compellingly. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be long-term? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not e-business. If you innovate perfectly, you may have to architect seamlessly. Imagine a combination of DOM and XML. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We realize that if you revolutionize interactively then you may also architect holistically. Quick: do you have a magnetic strategy for monitoring new partnerships? We think that most resource-constrained web sites use far too much RDF, and not enough PGP. We understand that if you streamline interactively then you may also architect virally. The structuring factor is synergistic. ShadowLands has revamped the concept of revolutionary turn-key B2C leading-edge process management. We have come to know that if you disintermediate intra-vertically then you may also visualize micro-intuitively. We will step up our capacity to extend without devaluing our aptitude to actualize. What does it really mean to optimize "holistically"? What does the buzzword "relationships" really mean? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our portals but our capacity to upgrade. Think dot-com. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We have come to know that if you evolve ultra-iteravely then you may also leverage macro-intuitively. What does the term "scalable" really mean? Think ultra-24/7/365.