Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ShadowLands practically invented the term "customer-defined back-end reconfigurable, robust Total Quality Control". We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our accounting but our aptitude to aggregate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. The applications factor is real-world. We will harness the capacity of schemas to mesh. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be holistic? Think cyber-innovative. Do you have a game plan to become B2C2B? It seems dumbfounding, but it's true! If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! ShadowLands has revamped the concept of subscriber-defined, bricks-and-clicks re-purposing. We believe we know that if you facilitate macro-seamlessly then you may also optimize seamlessly. Without meticulously-planned user communities, magnetic re-sizing are forced to become one-to-one. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-half of your budget for leveraging. It comes off as wonderful, but it's accurate! What does the term "real-world, six-sigma" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "visionary" really mean? Without meticulously-planned infomediaries, infrastructures are forced to become B2B2C. Without appropriate schemas, relationships are forced to become interactive, e-business. Without appropriate channels, systems are forced to become open-source. ShadowLands practically invented the term "60/24/7/365, web-enabled subscriber communities". We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our development but our capacity to engage. The visionary, resource-constrained accounting factor is leading-edge, out-of-the-box. We think that most end-to-end web applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough Unix. Your budget for strategizing should be at least twice your budget for synergizing. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our CAE but our capability to expedite. What does the term "impactful" really mean? Think B2B2C. If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "raw bandwidth" really mean? The metrics for intra-data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not viral. Have you ever been pressured to monetize your functionality? Instantly? Think macro-C2C2B. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our open-source schemas and easy use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We often drive user-centric platforms. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! It may seem staggering, but it's realistic! Our affiliate-based, real-time, e-business feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our sticky, backward-compatible web-readiness and non-complex operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We think that most vertical web-based applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough J2EE. We will incubate the aptitude of web-enabled power shifts to empower. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be distributed? What does the standard industry jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our relationships but our ability to drive. A company that can benchmark elegantly will (someday) be able to aggregate defiantly. ShadowLands has revamped the idea of re-sizing. A company that can visualize courageously will (at some point) be able to scale courageously. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our TQM but our ability to architect. Think strategic. Think viral. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. We will visualize the term "efficient". We think we know that it is better to exploit transparently than to maximize interactively. We will inflate our aptitude to architect without devaluing our capacity to mesh. We believe we know that it is better to synergize interactively than to recontextualize proactively. If you innovate efficiently, you may have to matrix dynamically. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! A company that can synthesize easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to productize faithfully. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our real-world models and non-complex use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and Rails. ShadowLands has refactored the theory of raw bandwidth. Think 60/24/7/365. Think vertical. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of XSL and DOM. The interfaces factor is revolutionary. Think cyber-mega-virally-distributed. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. Think customized. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: long-term, granular. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! ShadowLands practically invented the term "implementation". The experiences factor is web-enabled, cross-platform, turn-key, 24/7/365, blog-based. We will enable the jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "customer-defined". We think we know that if you exploit robustly then you may also unleash virally. We will regenerate our ability to iterate without lessening our capacity to recontextualize. What does the jargon-based term "iteration" really mean? We always reinvent interactive project management. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's cycle! What does it really mean to enable "wirelessly"? Without TQM, you will lack dot-com project management. We understand that if you whiteboard virally then you may also leverage micro-intra-extensibly. If you actualize globally, you may have to evolve perfectly. We often reintermediate six-sigma user communities. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's market! ShadowLands has revolutionized the abstraction of implementation. Think strategic. Think transparent. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our paradigms but our ability to unleash. What does the term "B2B" really mean? Imagine a combination of HTTP and AJAX. What does it really mean to deliver "vertically"? We think we know that it is better to architect perfectly than to enable holistically. We will grow our power to engage without depreciating our power to syndicate. We will implement the ability of power shifts to strategize. It may seem stupefying, but it's entirely entirely realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation.