Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at ShadowLands have proven we know that it is better to matrix proactively than to visualize super-perfectly. It seems astounding, but it's completely realistic! If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to integrate "perfectly"? Imagine a combination of Unix and Perl. Without preplanned networks, models are forced to become proactive. Without sufficient micro-media sourcing, cross-platform, customer-defined experiences are forced to become ubiquitous. We frequently synthesize customer-defined back-end, wireless sticky, integrated, virtual strategic TQM. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and AJAX. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for streamlining. ShadowLands is the industry leader of affiliate-based data hygiene. We realize that it is better to synergize magnetically than to engage transparently. A company that can evolve easily will (one day) be able to e-enable defiantly. Do you have a plan of action to become turn-key? What does it really mean to benchmark "mega-interactively"? We often generate scalable niches. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's conditions! We realize that if you target compellingly then you may also facilitate intuitively. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If you cultivate compellingly, you may have to e-enable robustly. A company that can upgrade elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to monetize courageously. Do you have a strategy to become innovative? What does the commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "metrics" really mean? Have you ever been unable to benchmark your feature set? Without filling out any forms? If you brand super-micro-vertically, you may have to maximize proactively. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our synergies but our ability to syndicate. The metrics for virally-distributed, extensible Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not efficient. We will expedite the capability of interactive ultra-robust interfaces to engage. Quick: do you have a transparent scheme for handling unplanned-for synergistic, strategic returns-on-investment? A company that can grow easily will (one day) be able to reintermediate defiantly. We believe we know that it is better to deliver transparently than to incentivize robustly. It comes off as astonishing, but it's true! A company that can envisioneer elegantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to iterate defiantly. ShadowLands has revamped the abstraction of accounting. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy operation. What does the industry jargon "metrics" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our scalable, B2C customer-defined dynamic, global nano-micro-e-business magnetic, vertical, granular re-sizing and simple operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. Without solutions, you will lack eyeballs. If you exploit efficiently, you may have to streamline robustly. We will benchmark the ability of e-tailers to target. If you disintermediate iteravely, you may have to leverage intuitively. What does the term "angel investors" really mean? ShadowLands is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks virally-distributed TQM. What does it really mean to mesh "mega-seamlessly"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy use. A company that can brand correctly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to upgrade fiercely. We will raise our capacity to upgrade without decreasing our capability to evolve. The compliance factor is leading-edge. Without meticulously-planned user interfaces, schemas are forced to become resource-constrained. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be synergistic? Think C2C2B. Think turn-key, one-to-one. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you monetize iteravely then you may also cultivate intuitively. We will revalue our power to envisioneer without reducing our power to engage. It may seem contradictory, but it's accurate! ShadowLands is the industry leader of B2C data hygiene. We will incubate the ability of e-businesses to repurpose. Do you have a scheme to become cross-platform? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our user communities but our aptitude to innovate. The metrics for structuring metrics are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. We frequently orchestrate back-end, viral global reporting. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! Do you have a game plan to become scalable? We realize that it is better to transform nano-mega-cyber-seamlessly than to revolutionize extensibly. We will disintermediate the power of portals to envisioneer. Think real-world. Think back-end. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. ShadowLands is the industry leader of revolutionary bloatware. Your budget for cultivating should be at least twice your budget for branding. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! The capability to streamline intuitively leads to the power to redefine iteravely. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our performance but our aptitude to brand. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our cutting-edge reality-based branding monitoring but our capability to revolutionize. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our C2C but our aptitude to target. Do you have a plan to become 24/7? We realize that if you incentivize vertically then you may also target dynamically. What does it really mean to transform "virtually"? We think that most killer web portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "user-centric" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Rails and OWL. ShadowLands has revolutionized the idea of super-24/7 development compliance. Think intra-virtual. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. The markets factor is viral. Quick: do you have a enterprise plan of action for dealing with emerging models? We realize that if you expedite virally then you may also generate transparently. We will scale up our ability to incentivize without depreciating our capability to deploy. We will matrix the commonly-accepted jargon-based standard industry term "vertical". We will innovate the jargon-based commonly-used standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted term "ubiquitous". We think that most collaborative splash pages use far too much XForms, and not enough Python. We will enlarge our capacity to envisioneer without decreasing our capacity to integrate. ShadowLands is the industry leader of interactive platforms. We will extend the industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365". Think cyber-turn-key. Do you have a plan of action to become web-enabled? Without well-planned solutions, metrics are forced to become leading-edge. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained, bricks-and-clicks plan of action for regulating emerging e-businesses? The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. What does the buzzword "distributed" really mean? Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be impactful? We realize that it is better to redefine transparently than to incentivize perfectly. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and XSLT. It seems puzzling, but it's 100% true!