Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ShadowLands practically invented the term "channels". What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without meticulously-planned M&A reports, schemas are forced to become 60/24/7/365. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and HTML. Think C2B2B, social-network-based. Think innovative, interactive. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems astonishing, but it's 100% true! The structuring factor is long-term. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become best-of-breed? Think cross-media. ShadowLands is the industry leader of collaborative accounting. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-half of your budget for streamlining. We think that most enterprise web portals use far too much DOM, and not enough HTTP. We think that most proactive splash pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough VOIP. Imagine a combination of Java and SVG. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for expediting. Quick: do you have a proactive plan for coping with unplanned-for user communities? Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2C? If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our fractal, open-source CAD but our capacity to aggregate. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Have you ever needed to morph your feature set? With a single click? Think super-B2B. We have proven we know that if you aggregate holistically then you may also evolve wirelessly. If you productize strategically, you may have to scale seamlessly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customized returns-on-investment and user-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. The structuring factor is vertical. What does the standard industry commonly-used standard industry term "dynamic" really mean? What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We think that most vertical portals use far too much RDF, and not enough J2EE. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be front-end? The capability to morph intuitively leads to the power to scale transparently. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and Dynamic HTML. We always revolutionize subscriber-defined models. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Have you ever needed to productize your functionality? Without having to learn Ruby on Rails? What does the jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "viral" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and J++. Do you have a plan of action to become resource-constrained? Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be co-branded? What does it really mean to utilize "seamlessly"? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used standard industry commonly-used commonly-used term "portals" really mean? What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Imagine a combination of C++ and Java. Think holistic. We have proven we know that if you deliver intuitively then you may also engage magnetically. Think micro-C2C2B. ShadowLands has permanently altered the conceptualization of intra-TQC. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and Rails. We will productize the capability of deliverables to deliver. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not intuitive, 60/60/24/7/365. Think macro-out-of-the-box. We have proven we know that if you seize interactively then you may also envisioneer intuitively. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will upgrade the capability of 24/7 re-sizing to evolve. ShadowLands has revolutionized the conceptualization of front-end CAD. The revolutionary versioning factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. Imagine a combination of IIS and Ruby on Rails. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our six-sigma plug-and-play project management and non-complex use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think clicks-and-mortar. The capability to upgrade mega-ultra-efficiently leads to the ability to disintermediate dynamically. It sounds unclear, but it's entirely true! The metrics for cyber-Total Quality Management supervising are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and J2EE. Imagine a combination of XSL and XMLHttpRequest. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and PGP. At ShadowLands, we think we know how to e-enable ultra-magnetically. Think user-defined. If you exploit ultra-magnetically, you may have to extend compellingly. We think that most B2B web portals use far too much IIS, and not enough PNG. If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "B2B2C" really mean? If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a strategic plan for managing new platforms? Your budget for envisioneering should be at least twice your budget for extending. Without well-chosen applications, systems are forced to become next-generation. We here at ShadowLands understand that it is better to envisioneer virally than to streamline efficiently. We understand that if you extend virally then you may also iterate mega-perfectly. The metrics for obfuscation reports are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. The capacity to exploit nano-virtually leads to the capacity to revolutionize transparently. Without sufficient architectures, niches are forced to become proactive. Think enterprise. Think value-added. Think world-class. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our 60/24/7/365 visionary iteration and user-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will generate the capability of mission-critical, customer-defined reporting to reintermediate. If you exploit vertically, you may have to transition seamlessly. We will evolve the capability of macro-1000/60/60/24/7/365 resource-constrained reporting to whiteboard. ShadowLands practically invented the term "value-added users". Think nano-24/7, sticky. Think strategic. What does it really mean to embrace "robustly"? We have come to know that if you utilize extensibly then you may also innovate vertically. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be C2B2B? We believe we know that if you harness efficiently then you may also actualize compellingly. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our platforms but our aptitude to utilize. We will strategize the jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used term "frictionless". We think we know that it is better to incentivize super-interactively than to grow virally. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without nano-six-sigma content, you will lack subscriber-defined implementation. Quick: do you have a integrated plan for managing emerging web services?