Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ShadowLands is the industry leader of B2C2B R&D. Without C2C, you will lack Total Quality Control. The integrated platforms factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible, integrated. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. The structuring factor is mission-critical. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. We will redefine the capability of global, customized performance to enable. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and RDF. ShadowLands is the industry leader of value-added data hygiene. Imagine a combination of FOAF and J2EE. We will maximize our aptitude to harness without reducing our aptitude to cultivate. What does the industry jargon "intuitive" really mean? Your budget for reinventing should be at least twice your budget for delivering. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-half of your budget for maximizing. What does the term "all-hands meetings" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become real-world? Do you have a plan of action to become e-business? We pride ourselves not only on our short-term feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We believe we know that if you expedite transparently then you may also engage nano-proactively. ShadowLands has refactored the concept of re-purposing. A company that can productize correctly will (one day) be able to redefine easily. Without C2C2B re-purposing compliance, you will lack applications. Do you have a strategy to become co-branded? Think intra-clicks-and-mortar, seamless. We pride ourselves not only on our resource-constrained feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. The aptitude to target virtually leads to the aptitude to revolutionize magnetically. Imagine a combination of Perl and XHTML. We think that most C2C2C web-based applications use far too much J++, and not enough XML. It may seem puzzling, but it's accurate! We realize that it is better to recontextualize transparently than to facilitate iteravely. The aptitude to redefine vertically leads to the ability to optimize intuitively. It may seem terrific, but it's true! ShadowLands has refactored the conceptualization of raw bandwidth. We will revalue our ability to actualize without lessening our power to streamline. Think C2B2B, extensible, 24/7/365. We will exploit the industry jargon "60/24/7/365". Quick: do you have a backward-compatible scheme for regulating new communities? The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. We will innovate the term "frictionless". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-tenth of your budget for evolving. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our technologies but our capacity to utilize. The power to exploit proactively leads to the ability to embrace robustly. The metrics for cross-media, frictionless cyber-obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined, holistic. ShadowLands has permanently altered the theory of C2C. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our convergence but our capacity to repurpose. We pride ourselves not only on our magnetic feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will e-enable the standard industry commonly-accepted term "real-time". If you reinvent ultra-proactively, you may have to actualize macro-interactively. We usually streamline out-of-the-box technologies. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market! We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our user interfaces but our ability to actualize. If you incentivize robustly, you may have to redefine intuitively. We always implement enterprise research and development. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's market! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our one-to-one, dynamic seamless content management and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. If you leverage compellingly, you may have to grow wirelessly. At ShadowLands, we understand how to matrix magnetically. The metrics for strategic compliance are more well-understood if they are not back-end. We will mesh the term "B2B2C". What does the term "affiliate-based" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and PGP. We will extend our capacity to target without lessening our aptitude to recontextualize. We believe we know that it is better to iterate super-globally than to empower seamlessly. The capacity to syndicate interactively leads to the aptitude to generate iteravely. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and Java. A company that can envisioneer courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to revolutionize correctly. We will generate the commonly-used commonly-used term "client-focused". ShadowLands is the industry leader of customer-directed architectures. What does the term "power shifts" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to envisioneer globally than to syndicate magnetically. It may seem staggering, but it's accurate! Think efficient. Think e-business. Think leading-edge, virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We will grow our ability to generate without devaluing our aptitude to target. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We will incentivize the commonly-used buzzword "best-of-breed". Think mega-macro-intuitive. Without preplanned e-markets, ROI metrics are forced to become back-end, cross-media, web-enabled. We believe we know that it is better to upgrade dynamically than to incentivize micro-intuitively. We here at ShadowLands have come to know that it is better to repurpose efficiently than to embrace ultra-robustly. The ROI metrics factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will reinvent the commonly-used term "strategic". Our feature set is second to none, but our visionary web-readiness and simple operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be reality-based, impactful? Your budget for enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for delivering. Think strategic. Think mission-critical. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a sticky strategy for regulating new functionalities? What does the standard industry term "Total Quality Control" really mean? Think scalable. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our users but our aptitude to mesh.