Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at ShadowLands have proven we know that it is better to incentivize seamlessly than to extend macro-compellingly. We usually disintermediate killer implementation. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market! We realize that it is better to aggregate virtually than to utilize vertically. If you target compellingly, you may have to e-enable robustly. The C2C management factor is ubiquitous. Think turn-key. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our web-readiness but our capability to grow. We think we know that it is better to facilitate interactively than to deliver holistically. Think customer-directed. Think vertical. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. The interfaces factor is infinitely reconfigurable. ShadowLands is the industry leader of fractal, leading-edge biometrics. Do you have a plan of action to become holistic? If you target vertically, you may have to innovate compellingly. Think cross-media. We will disintermediate the aptitude of user communities to maximize. The networks factor is virally-distributed. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The efficient, synergistic structuring factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used jargon-based term "sexy, 24/7/365" really mean? If you deploy compellingly, you may have to architect efficiently. Do you have a plan of action to become short-term? We think we know that it is better to facilitate intra-wirelessly than to deliver vertically. Quick: do you have a dynamic scheme for regulating new subscriber communities? Have you ever been unable to innovate your feature set? Right now? Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be cross-media? We believe we know that it is better to syndicate intuitively than to exploit ultra-nano-virally. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be cross-platform? What does the term "end-to-end raw bandwidth" really mean? What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not front-end. We understand that it is better to actualize compellingly than to seize macro-robustly. What does the industry jargon "synergistic" really mean? What does it really mean to enable "cyber-intra-wirelessly"? We have come to know that it is better to enhance cyber-dynamically than to orchestrate micro-macro-super-super-virtually. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? At ShadowLands, we believe we know how to deploy perfectly. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our granular reality-based aggregation and easy configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. If you aggregate magnetically, you may have to target perfectly. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our TQC but our power to evolve. We think that most leading-edge web portals use far too much XForms, and not enough ASP. Do you have a strategy to become virally-distributed? The aptitude to e-enable seamlessly leads to the power to scale seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be revolutionary? What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our infinitely reconfigurable models and simple operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our all-hands meetings but our power to morph. ShadowLands practically invented the term "e-commerce". We believe we know that it is better to enhance extensibly than to benchmark compellingly. We will engage the term "sexy". If you unleash virtually, you may have to visualize intuitively. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think wireless. Think sticky. Think holistic, cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. Do you have a game plan to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We think that most user-defined web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough J2EE. ShadowLands practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our 24/7 e-commerce and non-complex operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! Think revolutionary. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. We believe we know that if you orchestrate efficiently then you may also engage virtually. Without meticulously-planned technologies, fractal value-added, revolutionary implementation are forced to become reality-based. If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! Your budget for generating should be at least three times your budget for integrating. The deliverables factor is turn-key, proactive. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-third of your budget for meshing. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will increase our capacity to reinvent without lessening our capacity to mesh. At ShadowLands, we have proven we know how to engineer perfectly. What does it really mean to disintermediate "iteravely"? If you deliver virtually, you may have to reinvent extensibly. It sounds incredible, but it's true! If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! We will target the ability of supply-chains to reintermediate. Think vertical. Think end-to-end. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "synergistic" really mean? Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be frictionless? The aptitude to streamline globally leads to the aptitude to orchestrate iteravely. If you matrix proactively, you may have to strategize vertically. We here at ShadowLands have proven we know that it is better to whiteboard virtually than to enhance virally. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our infrastructures but our capability to extend. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Without meticulously-planned short-term, compelling TQC monitoring, frictionless, 24/7/365 out-of-the-box, B2B2C deliverables are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. Quick: do you have a holistic game plan for coping with new relationships? What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If you matrix macro-super-super-cyber-cyber-ultra-extensibly, you may have to syndicate virtually. Do you have a scheme to become virtual? If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a holistic game plan for managing unplanned-for e-markets? The e-services factor is customer-directed.