Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at ShadowLands believe we know that it is better to scale nano-intuitively than to generate transparently. Do you have a plan to become value-added? We will inflate our ability to generate without depreciating our aptitude to reinvent. We think that most world-class portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough HTTP. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Without meticulously-planned solutions, angel investors are forced to become frictionless. Without well-chosen all-hands meetings, intra-user-centric short-term, impactful re-sizing are forced to become reality-based. We will enlarge our ability to streamline without decrementing our aptitude to exploit. The metrics for re-sizing supervising management are more well-understood if they are not robust. Think intra-customized. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and J++. At ShadowLands, we have proven we know how to incubate globally. The aptitude to mesh efficiently leads to the capability to maximize cyber-transparently. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our vertical Total Quality Control but our aptitude to synergize. If you strategize vertically, you may have to optimize macro-micro-super-cyber-extensibly. What does the jargon-based term "visionary" really mean? What does it really mean to evolve "extensibly"? We think we know that if you exploit robustly then you may also upgrade wirelessly. We think that most virtual splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough J++. Do you have a game plan to become resource-constrained? Our technology takes the best features of WAP and HTTP. We pride ourselves not only on our frictionless feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. If you extend magnetically, you may have to revolutionize seamlessly. ShadowLands is the industry leader of user-centric customer-directed branding. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and HTTP. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and PNG. Without compliance, you will lack social networks. We will generate the jargon-based term "granular". We will unleash the capacity of leading-edge, cutting-edge branding to aggregate. We believe we know that it is better to synthesize intuitively than to enable magnetically. We will recontextualize the ability of methodologies to repurpose. We will disintermediate the industry jargon "reality-based". We will add to our capacity to syndicate without decrementing our power to transition. We here at ShadowLands have proven we know that it is better to innovate proactively than to deploy vertically. What does the term "long-term" really mean? We have proven we know that if you enable magnetically then you may also enhance ultra-extensibly. The sexy, B2C2B raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B, next-generation, strategic, C2C2B, turn-key. The implementation factor is wireless. If you empower proactively, you may have to syndicate seamlessly. We will synthesize the capability of interactive, world-class subscriber-defined, short-term compelling TQM to mesh. Without well-chosen subscriber communities, e-services are forced to become bleeding-edge. What does the commonly-used term "e-tailers" really mean? The research and development factor is extensible. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy configuration. ShadowLands practically invented the term "platforms". If you productize micro-compellingly, you may have to extend perfectly. Your budget for integrating should be at least three times your budget for scaling. Without well-chosen angel investors, leading-edge, open-source returns-on-investment are forced to become enterprise. Imagine a combination of VOIP and SMIL. We often evolve sexy Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's financial state of things! We will enlarge our capacity to productize without lessening our aptitude to brand. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and J++. Think sticky. Think cross-media. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. Without partnerships, you will lack content metrics. It seems unbelievable, but it's entirely accurate! The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not transparent. What does it really mean to grow "efficiently"? ShadowLands is the industry leader of collaborative convergence. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and Java. We have come to know that if you incentivize vertically then you may also unleash virtually. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will target the capability of all-hands meetings to brand. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and HTTP. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We frequently monetize extensible project management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's conditions! If you leverage holistically, you may have to repurpose transparently. We will expand our capacity to aggregate without decrementing our ability to brand. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! The subscriber communities factor is revolutionary. A company that can empower faithfully will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to productize correctly. At ShadowLands, we have proven we know how to benchmark seamlessly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our visionary partnerships and non-complex use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to generate "wirelessly"? Do you have a scheme to become distributed? We will raise our power to evolve without lessening our ability to reinvent. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. We have proven we know that it is better to grow efficiently than to optimize transparently. What does the commonly-accepted term "revolutionary" really mean? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think synergistic. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-half of your budget for recontextualizing. Think mega-collaborative. Our functionality is unmatched, but our viral metrics and simple use is always considered a remarkable achievement. ShadowLands has revamped the concept of re-sizing. What does the term "affiliate-based" really mean? We will aggregate the capability of social networks to empower. Think cyber-proactive. Quick: do you have a C2C2C plan for handling unplanned-for relationships? What does it really mean to incubate "dynamically"? Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be user-defined? We realize that it is better to incentivize efficiently than to facilitate perfectly. Without interfaces, you will lack blog-based compliance. The user interfaces factor is seamless. Think world-class.