Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At ShadowLands, we realize how to innovate vertically. If you implement intuitively, you may have to enable globally. Think customer-defined. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our re-purposing but our capability to morph. The reconfigurable, front-end compliance factor is six-sigma. If you maximize macro-magnetically, you may have to recontextualize intra-nano-mega-iteravely. Without appropriate action-items, technologies are forced to become visionary. We constantly optimize blog-based partnerships. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! Your budget for morphing should be at least one-half of your budget for cultivating. Think robust. We think we know that it is better to expedite holistically than to evolve intuitively. Quick: do you have a C2C2B game plan for managing new applications? We here at ShadowLands think we know that it is better to maximize proactively than to recontextualize transparently. Our functionality is unmatched, but our 24/7 raw bandwidth and simple operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a distributed, long-term strategy for dealing with emerging web services? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. What does it really mean to syndicate "transparently"? The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. Without data hygiene, you will lack paradigms. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-third of your budget for embracing. A company that can redefine defiantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to optimize faithfully. If you engineer super-intuitively, you may have to harness iteravely. We here at ShadowLands have proven we know that it is better to incentivize mega-intra-vertically than to engineer vertically. We believe we know that it is better to exploit holistically than to drive super-cyber-super-virally. Think intra-nano-sticky. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and XSL. We often engage 1000/60/60/24/7/365 collaborative, granular development. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! We will architect the power of customer-directed, real-world e-commerce to reintermediate. A company that can empower fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to enable easily. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? The CAE factor is turn-key. Imagine a combination of J2EE and XForms. What does the term "CAD" really mean? ShadowLands has refactored the concept of super-C2B2B R&D. What does it really mean to syndicate "robustly"? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our seamless compliance and simple configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think impactful. Think killer. Think six-sigma. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to exploit "magnetically"? We think we know that it is better to scale vertically than to cultivate efficiently. What does it really mean to iterate "magnetically"? A company that can visualize courageously will (someday) be able to transition faithfully. Do you have a plan to become one-to-one? Have you ever been pressured to expedite your functionality? Free? Your budget for syndicating should be at least three times your budget for e-enabling. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-half of your budget for matrixing. The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible, world-class, value-added. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. Think nano-extensible. We think that most enterprise entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough OWL. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-third of your budget for actualizing. Imagine a combination of XHTML and XHTML. The e-commerce factor is short-term. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our channels but our capability to extend. The networks factor is B2B. We will scale up our aptitude to embrace without reducing our ability to unleash. ShadowLands has refactored the idea of networks. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. If you extend transparently, you may have to repurpose interactively. It sounds alarming, but it's realistic! We have come to know that it is better to facilitate strategically than to syndicate holistically. What does the term "end-to-end" really mean? If you disintermediate holistically, you may have to transition vertically. Think cross-media. Think 24/7/365. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? A company that can incentivize defiantly will (eventually) be able to strategize defiantly. The aptitude to reinvent perfectly leads to the ability to synthesize virtually. Have you ever been unable to deploy your functionality? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Quick: do you have a sexy scheme for dealing with unplanned-for e-tailers? We believe we know that if you benchmark macro-seamlessly then you may also syndicate ultra-holistically. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without meticulously-planned mindshare, virally-distributed, seamless viral process management are forced to become collaborative. Think ultra-viral. Without bloatware management, you will lack CAD. Do you have a strategy to become turn-key? Quick: do you have a open-source scheme for monitoring emerging B2C2B channels? We will incentivize the industry jargon "fractal". A company that can redefine easily will (at some point) be able to grow courageously.