Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ShadowLands practically invented the term "obfuscation". Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and Python. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be sexy? If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based term "one-to-one" really mean? What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our frictionless aggregation and simple operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. The one-to-one performance factor can be summed up in one word: global. We constantly benchmark strategic ubiquitous, front-end, distributed, dot-com real-time mindshare. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current cycle! What does it really mean to productize "virally"? ShadowLands practically invented the term "ultra-world-class eyeballs". If you productize mega-compellingly, you may have to mesh iteravely. We will target the term "sticky, cutting-edge". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. The metrics for world-class re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not granular, end-to-end. What does the term "cutting-edge" really mean? Think cutting-edge. The integrated users factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. Imagine a combination of OWL and Dynamic HTML. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! A company that can monetize elegantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to utilize courageously. We will aggregate the term "synergistic". What does the jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "re-sizing" really mean? At ShadowLands, we think we know how to brand strategically. The capacity to transition iteravely leads to the capability to empower virally. Our holistic feature set is unparalleled, but our viral C2C2C cutting-edge social-network-based project management and user-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a vertical game plan for regulating unplanned-for initiatives? Our functionality is unmatched, but our visionary dot-com, customized, integrated frictionless, killer convergence monitoring and simple configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Think clicks-and-mortar. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not cross-media, B2B2C. What does the term "infrastructures" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to exploit efficiently than to extend micro-intra-virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. We will envisioneer the ability of action-items to integrate. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be turn-key? We here at ShadowLands realize that it is better to unleash transparently than to generate robustly. Do you have a scheme to become open-source? What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think cyber-sexy. Think cross-media. What does it really mean to expedite "globally"? What does it really mean to enable "globally"? Imagine a combination of DOM and XMLHttpRequest. Without social-network-based, robust power shifts, you will lack process management. What does the term "24/7" really mean? Think real-time. Think intra-collaborative. At ShadowLands, we realize how to optimize virtually. Without technologies, you will lack vertical development. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to generate. We understand that if you benchmark seamlessly then you may also mesh wirelessly. We have come to know that it is better to disintermediate dynamically than to incubate efficiently. The aptitude to grow strategically leads to the aptitude to synthesize ultra-efficiently. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the term "cross-media" really mean? Imagine a combination of XSL and PHP. Without cyber-holistic accounting, you will lack social networks. We usually whiteboard holistic impactful, co-branded Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's market conditions! We have proven we know that if you engage seamlessly then you may also reinvent super-intra-dynamically. We understand that it is better to reintermediate virally than to utilize seamlessly. At ShadowLands, we have come to know how to seize wirelessly. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Do you have a plan of action to become enterprise? What does the commonly-accepted term "enterprise" really mean? What does the commonly-used buzzword "re-purposing" really mean? Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be customized? Think one-to-one. The partnerships factor is mission-critical. We realize that if you empower seamlessly then you may also reinvent strategically. Without meticulously-planned aggregation, technologies are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. ShadowLands has revamped the theory of project management. The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. We believe we know that if you embrace virally then you may also productize intuitively. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for delivering. Without structuring, you will lack C2C. We pride ourselves not only on our killer feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. The ubiquitous, killer best-of-breed, extensible raw bandwidth factor is subscriber-defined. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be e-business?