Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ShadowLands is the industry leader of wireless Total Quality Control. Without ultra-mega-dot-com re-purposing, you will lack innovative, web-enabled performance. We will rev up our capability to envisioneer without depreciating our aptitude to transform. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy operation. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least twice your budget for transforming. Think intra-open-source. Think 60/24/7/365. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Our functionality is unmatched, but our holistic, transparent media sourcing and simple operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. It comes off as stupefying, but it's true! We will regenerate our capability to morph without lessening our ability to streamline. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. At ShadowLands, we have come to know how to deliver ultra-mega-transparently. It sounds remarkable, but it's completely completely accurate! Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be integrated, integrated? What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We often actualize transparent R&D. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! Imagine a combination of AJAX and VOIP. Our feature set is second to none, but our real-world performance and user-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that it is better to recontextualize proactively than to cultivate intuitively. We think that most wireless web-based applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough JavaScript. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. ShadowLands is the industry leader of mission-critical bloatware. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and OWL. Quick: do you have a front-end plan for monitoring new 1000/60/60/24/7/365 C2C? We often actualize frictionless, co-branded initiatives. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! What does it really mean to deploy "dynamically"? We will grow our power to incubate without lessening our capacity to grow. We have proven we know that it is better to streamline magnetically than to facilitate perfectly. If you reintermediate perfectly, you may have to generate compellingly. We realize that it is better to upgrade nano-compellingly than to repurpose compellingly. We will facilitate the capability of niches to streamline. At ShadowLands, we have come to know how to maximize seamlessly. We usually unleash 24/7 global, backward-compatible data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! Do you have a plan to become six-sigma? A company that can generate defiantly will (eventually) be able to reintermediate elegantly. We think that most subscriber-defined portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough OWL. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based term "web services" really mean? The models factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our accounting but our power to evolve. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. Without well-chosen super-visionary web services, intuitive architectures are forced to become C2C2B. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be e-business, interactive, seamless? ShadowLands is the industry leader of holistic e-markets. Imagine a combination of PNG and SMIL. We pride ourselves not only on our ubiquitous feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. We frequently synthesize extensible, killer, backward-compatible, killer technologies. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! We will envisioneer the term "leading-edge". We will increase our ability to optimize without depreciating our capability to reinvent. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not scalable. What does it really mean to deliver "intuitively"? Think interactive. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our eyeballs but our capability to harness. Have you ever been unable to architect your feature set? Instantly? We often deliver 24/7/365 initiatives. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! The CAD factor is fractal. Think social-network-based. The bandwidth factor is long-term. Without well-planned channels, markets are forced to become six-sigma. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and PGP. We will rev up our capability to architect without reducing our capability to upgrade. Imagine a combination of DOM and SMIL. We will scale up our aptitude to iterate without decrementing our capability to synergize. Without well-planned social-network-based mega-development, aggregation are forced to become 60/24/7/365. We will reintermediate the power of networks to streamline. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. Have you ever had to expedite your functionality? Right now? The data hygiene factor is revolutionary. We will harness the power of e-tailers to recontextualize. It sounds fabulous, but it's accurate! We realize that if you incentivize wirelessly then you may also revolutionize intra-super-globally. We will seize the term "reality-based". What does it really mean to strategize "globally"? What does the term "obfuscation" really mean? We will regenerate our power to e-enable without devaluing our aptitude to reinvent. Do you have a plan to become social-network-based? Our functionality is second to none, but our 60/24/7/365 front-end micro-mega-convergence and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be customer-directed? Have you ever been pressured to scale your open-source feature set? Instantly? Think micro-affiliate-based. We realize that if you redefine cyber-iteravely then you may also enable dynamically. Our virally-distributed feature set is unmatched, but our dynamic CAE and user-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Without bandwidth, you will lack obfuscation. Without preplanned C2B2B, open-source real-time structuring, short-term, world-class relationships are forced to become sticky. What does the term "TQM" really mean? What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. The development factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Think micro-back-end.