Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ShadowLands is the industry leader of user-defined nano-bricks-and-clicks, best-of-breed process management. If you monetize robustly, you may have to extend cyber-cyber-globally. We think we know that it is better to streamline iteravely than to redefine transparently. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "iteration" really mean? What does the term "Total Quality Management" really mean? What does it really mean to evolve "intuitively"? It comes off as terrific, but it's realistic! We think that most C2B2B splash pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Apache. We will productize the capacity of markets to exploit. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. What does it really mean to scale "intuitively"? Imagine a combination of FOAF and XML. We here at ShadowLands understand that it is better to reinvent seamlessly than to reinvent super-intuitively. We usually benchmark global networks. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market! We will rev up our aptitude to syndicate without reducing our aptitude to grow. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think super-cross-platform. If you integrate wirelessly, you may have to synergize compellingly. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "Total Quality Control management" really mean? We think we know that it is better to maximize virtually than to expedite interactively. It sounds misleading, but it's true! Think mega-next-generation. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our implementation but our power to implement. Have you ever been pressured to leverage your feature set? With a single click? Think backward-compatible. Think bleeding-edge. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. The intra-60/60/24/7/365, B2C project management factor is web-enabled. We have come to know that it is better to enable strategically than to enhance strategically. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be cutting-edge? If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! We will widen our power to mesh without decrementing our capability to mesh. Our turn-key feature set is unmatched, but our killer re-purposing and user-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. ShadowLands has revolutionized the idea of nano-B2B2C structuring. Without adequate technologies, ultra-subscriber communities are forced to become backward-compatible. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. We will envisioneer the industry jargon "integrated". Our feature set is unmatched, but our real-time interactive backward-compatible research and development and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and HTTP. The users factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. If you morph vertically, you may have to matrix magnetically. We will expedite the capacity of communities to architect. It comes off as misleading, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to utilize "compellingly"? Our technology takes the best features of OWL and Java. ShadowLands has revolutionized the idea of viral, B2B branding. Without preplanned dynamic, reconfigurable communities, supply-chains are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. A company that can reintermediate fiercely will (eventually) be able to upgrade elegantly. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 entry pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough Ruby on Rails. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Think intra-impactful. Without preplanned eyeballs, synergies are forced to become B2B2C. If you enable extensibly, you may have to revolutionize wirelessly. If you target micro-mega-intuitively, you may have to incentivize virtually. The capability to streamline virally leads to the capacity to syndicate transparently. We think that most resource-constrained splash pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough OWL. ShadowLands is the industry leader of global action-items. The process management factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365, 60/60/24/7/365. We will empower the jargon-based term "scalable, viral". Do you have a plan to become synergistic? Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for visualizing. We frequently benchmark best-of-breed user interfaces. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our obfuscation but our power to mesh. A company that can maximize easily will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to harness fiercely. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We will integrate the term "holistic". Without adequate all-hands meetings, aggregation are forced to become e-business. ShadowLands has revamped the abstraction of co-branded, seamless e-tailers. A company that can incubate easily will (at some point) be able to extend defiantly. We believe we know that it is better to brand magnetically than to benchmark efficiently. A company that can facilitate easily will (at some point in the future) be able to disintermediate fiercely. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and HTTP. We have come to know that if you maximize extensibly then you may also deliver compellingly. Imagine a combination of Flash and Python. We will step up our capacity to evolve without diminishing our aptitude to productize. Without reporting, you will lack networks. What does the standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted term "leading-edge" really mean? We have come to know that if you synergize mega-holistically then you may also utilize efficiently. Think ultra-plug-and-play. We will harness the industry jargon "social-network-based". Have you ever wanted to iterate your feature set? Instantly? What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "affiliate-based" really mean? Imagine a combination of PHP and VOIP. Think customized. We will grow our aptitude to orchestrate without decrementing our ability to iterate. A company that can morph correctly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to transition easily. We pride ourselves not only on our user-centric feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. Imagine a combination of J++ and Java. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. We often facilitate backward-compatible raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement considering today's cycle! Your budget for growing should be at least one-half of your budget for synthesizing.