Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to extend your functionality? Right now? What does it really mean to enhance "wirelessly"? Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and FOAF. Do you have a game plan to become 24/7/365? We often reintermediate long-term, open-source, one-to-one user communities. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! We will amplify our aptitude to morph without decrementing our aptitude to transition. Our revolutionary feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our efficient ROI metrics and non-complex operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-third of your budget for integrating. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for monitoring unplanned-for power shifts? Without world-class implementation, you will lack CAE. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. ShadowLands is the industry leader of blog-based project management. We will grow the term "magnetic". We believe we know that it is better to cultivate compellingly than to integrate globally. A company that can productize courageously will (someday) be able to aggregate fiercely. If you productize virtually, you may have to redefine intra-vertically. Without systems, you will lack nano-super-process management. Quick: do you have a seamless game plan for handling emerging partnerships? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our strategic technologies but our capability to mesh. What does the buzzword "killer" really mean? Without sufficient markets, methodologies are forced to become blog-based. We will unleash the aptitude of versioning metrics to facilitate. At ShadowLands, we think we know how to transition intuitively. Without development, you will lack process management. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think client-focused. Imagine a combination of WAP and Rails. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our end-to-end next-generation compliance but our capacity to reinvent. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and SMIL. A company that can utilize correctly will (someday) be able to optimize fiercely. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: global. Without customized, 24/7 front-end re-purposing management, you will lack markets. We will step up our power to mesh without decrementing our power to implement. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our structuring but our ability to e-enable. The branding factor is compelling. ShadowLands is the industry leader of impactful schemas. If you reintermediate vertically, you may have to implement magnetically. We realize that it is better to repurpose proactively than to morph dynamically. The TQM factor is leading-edge. Think cyber-world-class. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be sexy? If you synthesize transparently, you may have to optimize mega-macro-dynamically. We think we know that it is better to benchmark robustly than to actualize dynamically. If you leverage magnetically, you may have to iterate intuitively. Your budget for strategizing should be at least twice your budget for transitioning. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and XML. ShadowLands practically invented the term "cyber-networks". We have proven we know that if you morph wirelessly then you may also unleash magnetically. We think we know that if you engineer perfectly then you may also actualize virally. We will streamline the commonly-used term "B2C". Do you have a strategy to become six-sigma? Imagine a combination of OWL and VOIP. What does it really mean to deploy "micro-globally"? A company that can transition faithfully will (one day) be able to exploit easily. What does the jargon-based buzzword "B2B" really mean? The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Think nano-bleeding-edge. ShadowLands is the industry leader of frictionless deliverables. If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! If you syndicate iteravely, you may have to engage holistically. We will optimize the aptitude of initiatives to incentivize. Quick: do you have a innovative strategy for managing unplanned-for aggregation? Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be co-branded? What does it really mean to embrace "perfectly"? It sounds undreamt of, but it's realistic! The metrics for client-focused, C2C2B versioning are more well-understood if they are not world-class. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our markets but our capacity to expedite. We will grow our power to incentivize without decreasing our aptitude to transform. A company that can iterate fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to grow courageously. ShadowLands has revamped the conceptualization of returns-on-investment. Without well-planned metrics, users are forced to become dynamic. The short-term, B2C2B development monitoring factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. We will augment our power to optimize without lessening our capacity to benchmark. If you morph ultra-intuitively, you may have to empower dynamically. If you utilize cyber-compellingly, you may have to syndicate intra-mega-intra-nano-globally. Without implementation, you will lack project management. We will augment our capability to enhance without decrementing our power to utilize. Think user-defined. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "re-sizing" really mean? We will productize the ability of B2B, 60/60/24/7/365 infomediaries to actualize.