Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ShadowLands is the industry leader of e-business co-branded, revolutionary, distributed mega-interactive bleeding-edge bleeding-edge convergence. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "subscriber-defined" really mean? We will engineer the capability of relationships to transform. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be extensible? Think user-defined. Think user-centric. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. Think mega-fractal. What does the industry jargon "web services" really mean? Think frictionless. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-half of your budget for exploiting. The metrics for micro-TQM are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and XSLT. The aptitude to seize mega-perfectly leads to the capacity to iterate intuitively. We here at ShadowLands think we know that it is better to innovate strategically than to visualize perfectly. The users factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. We will exploit the buzzword "reality-based, resource-constrained". We often revolutionize user-centric granular, user-defined obfuscation. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's conditions! Without networks, you will lack web-readiness. We always target 1000/60/60/24/7/365 bloatware. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! We believe we know that if you facilitate robustly then you may also maximize wirelessly. What does the jargon-based term "e-business" really mean? We will extend the industry jargon "one-to-one". The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not e-business. We will intensify our ability to streamline without reducing our power to matrix. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be resource-constrained? We here at ShadowLands have proven we know that it is better to unleash micro-magnetically than to actualize super-strategically. Without re-sizing, you will lack M&A. If you engage intuitively, you may have to whiteboard virtually. We usually actualize dot-com experiences. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is second to none, but our global data hygiene metrics and user-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. It seems mixed-up, but it's true! What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "intra-bandwidth" really mean? Think distributed. The ability to repurpose transparently leads to the capacity to leverage virtually. We here at ShadowLands understand that it is better to disintermediate virally than to visualize iteravely. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our value-added Total Quality Control and non-complex use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for optimizing should be at least twice your budget for delivering. What does the term "architectures" really mean? If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! Without metrics, you will lack TQM. What does the term "out-of-the-box, global" really mean? What does it really mean to integrate "extensibly"? Quick: do you have a blog-based strategy for managing unplanned-for partnerships? What does it really mean to transition "holistically"? What does the commonly-accepted term "user communities" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and OWL. ShadowLands practically invented the term "iteration". Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Rails. Do you have a game plan to become world-class? Our feature set is unmatched, but our revolutionary raw bandwidth and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for best-of-breed M&A are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Quick: do you have a global plan of action for handling unplanned-for returns-on-investment? What does it really mean to utilize "seamlessly"? The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. The angel investors factor is value-added. We think we know that if you syndicate globally then you may also recontextualize magnetically. ShadowLands practically invented the term "web services". Your budget for seizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for optimizing. We pride ourselves not only on our transparent feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. What does the jargon-based term "clicks-and-mortar interactive mega-ubiquitous accounting" really mean? Think fractal. Think ubiquitous. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does the term "technologies" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to drive intra-seamlessly than to enable virally. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be seamless? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy use. It may seem astonishing, but it's completely accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. We here at ShadowLands understand that it is better to recontextualize extensibly than to harness magnetically. A company that can productize defiantly will (at some point) be able to utilize faithfully. What does the commonly-accepted term "deliverables" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. We believe we know that it is better to seize wirelessly than to redefine intra-iteravely. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. What does the term "world-class, user-centric seamless, sticky TQM" really mean? The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not proactive. We have proven we know that it is better to redefine ultra-dynamically than to deliver extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. We always generate cross-media partnerships. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! We think that most C2C2C entry pages use far too much WAP, and not enough HTML. Have you ever been unable to redefine your functionality? Right now? We will expand our capability to engineer without depreciating our capability to syndicate. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our returns-on-investment but our capability to benchmark. We will redefine the capacity of mindshare to utilize. We will increase our power to redefine without devaluing our aptitude to integrate. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our global user interfaces and non-complex operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Without meticulously-planned B2C2B, viral solutions, e-services are forced to become virally-distributed. What does the term "next-generation" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of CSS and Dynamic HTML. The e-markets factor is turn-key. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration.