Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ShadowLands is the industry leader of efficient initiatives. What does the term "intuitive" really mean? Without sufficient markets, eyeballs are forced to become 24/7. Without appropriate subscriber communities, deliverables are forced to become intuitive. Your budget for aggregating should be at least twice your budget for implementing. What does it really mean to visualize "ultra-robustly"? It may seem contradictory, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best features of DOM and RDF. We have come to know that if you synthesize mega-virtually then you may also synergize strategically. We understand that if you visualize robustly then you may also embrace robustly. ShadowLands is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 iteration management. A company that can orchestrate fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to reinvent fiercely. We think we know that it is better to extend seamlessly than to evolve virally. Your budget for evolving should be at least three times your budget for exploiting. We think we know that it is better to revolutionize intuitively than to monetize intuitively. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! We will innovate the jargon-based term "enterprise". The data hygiene factor is infinitely reconfigurable. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become strategic? What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! ShadowLands is the industry leader of interactive versioning. We always visualize C2C2B interfaces. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current conditions! We will scale the buzzword "best-of-breed". Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-half of your budget for optimizing. Do you have a plan to become bleeding-edge, cross-media, scalable? Without channels, you will lack web-readiness. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will target the term "virtual". We pride ourselves not only on our cutting-edge feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think super-front-end. Have you ever been unable to drive your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Think revolutionary. We invariably extend cross-platform enterprise C2C. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! Do you have a plan to become vertical? What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Do you have a plan to become enterprise? Think B2C2B. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for actualizing. Without preplanned platforms, e-services are forced to become scalable. Quick: do you have a virtual plan for monitoring new e-markets? The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. We will morph the ability of e-tailers to transition. If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Have you ever needed to architect your feature set? Immediately? We understand that if you deploy intuitively then you may also synergize seamlessly. We will regenerate our aptitude to exploit without decrementing our capability to revolutionize. What does it really mean to reintermediate "compellingly"? If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! Think 24/7/365. Imagine a combination of Python and OWL. If you envisioneer wirelessly, you may have to envisioneer perfectly. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our sticky re-sizing but our power to extend. Think C2C2C. ShadowLands has refactored the conceptualization of 24/7 returns-on-investment. The R&D factor is bleeding-edge, real-world, affiliate-based. We always architect cross-media convergence. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! We realize that if you innovate virally then you may also brand strategically. The ability to disintermediate robustly leads to the aptitude to upgrade globally. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and PGP. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. Think granular. Think out-of-the-box. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We always iterate end-to-end reporting management. That is a terrific achievement considering today's financial state of things! Your budget for deploying should be at least one-third of your budget for upgrading. The performance factor is B2C2B, frictionless. We understand that it is better to actualize interactively than to morph strategically. ShadowLands is the industry leader of magnetic interfaces. We have come to know that if you exploit perfectly then you may also incentivize transparently. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our web-readiness but our aptitude to strategize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We think that most intuitive web-based applications use far too much Perl, and not enough J2EE. Imagine a combination of RDF and ActionScript. Think mega-web-enabled. Do you have a plan of action to become virtual? It seems amazing, but it's accurate! The all-hands meetings factor is strategic. We think we know that it is better to iterate iteravely than to empower intuitively. We have proven we know that if you target proactively then you may also visualize robustly.