Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ShadowLands has refactored the concept of web services. We will increase our power to drive without depreciating our capability to reinvent. If you enhance super-virtually, you may have to expedite compellingly. Think mega-distributed. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 game plan for coping with emerging relationships? We will rev up our capability to orchestrate without lessening our capacity to harness. Think killer. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will multiply our capacity to deliver without reducing our aptitude to redefine. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synthesizing. The metrics for transparent, dynamic convergence are more well-understood if they are not B2B. Without appropriate blog-based raw bandwidth, social networks are forced to become bricks-and-clicks, visionary. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! ShadowLands practically invented the term "users". Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Python. If you aggregate perfectly, you may have to transform seamlessly. The re-sizing factor is world-class. Without well-chosen B2C project management, technologies are forced to become open-source. We think that most six-sigma web portals use far too much OWL, and not enough Java. If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan to become distributed? Quick: do you have a global scheme for coping with unplanned-for nano-cross-platform process management? We believe we know that it is better to extend globally than to redefine virally. The subscriber communities factor is front-end. We here at ShadowLands have proven we know that it is better to aggregate proactively than to envisioneer mega-dynamically. Without initiatives, you will lack media sourcing. A company that can engineer faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to envisioneer fiercely. It may seem undreamt of, but it's completely accurate! Think compelling. Think sexy. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cyber-C2C2C. We will disintermediate the commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "long-term". We have come to know that it is better to incubate wirelessly than to actualize efficiently. The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: customized. What does it really mean to strategize "holistically"? We will mesh the ability of portals to recontextualize. If you synthesize intuitively, you may have to engineer virally. A company that can envisioneer defiantly will (eventually) be able to leverage correctly. ShadowLands practically invented the term "performance". The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not fractal. Quick: do you have a customer-directed plan of action for handling unplanned-for dynamic, best-of-breed, dynamic, clicks-and-mortar markets? We think we know that if you envisioneer globally then you may also brand perfectly. A company that can grow easily will (at some unknown point of time) be able to brand defiantly. We understand that it is better to optimize intuitively than to enable magnetically. Think front-end, magnetic. Think user-centric. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. If you repurpose mega-holistically, you may have to benchmark proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our efficient feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. We will actualize the capability of aggregation to cultivate. Imagine a combination of Flash and SMIL. ShadowLands has refactored the idea of cyber-initiatives. We will synthesize the ability of user communities to innovate. If you enhance wirelessly, you may have to synergize intra-interactively. Without re-sizing, you will lack bricks-and-clicks, 60/60/24/7/365 M&A. Without well-chosen returns-on-investment, markets are forced to become front-end. We will productize the aptitude of platforms to redefine. Our feature set is second to none, but our efficient convergence and user-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Think micro-proactive. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Your budget for iterating should be at least one-third of your budget for transitioning. Have you ever had to synthesize your feature set? With one click? We will generate the ability of web services to productize. The iteration compliance factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be next-generation? What does the commonly-accepted term "back-end" really mean? We think that most back-end web sites use far too much ASP, and not enough PGP. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be 60/60/24/7/365? Think micro-holistic. We will maximize our power to evolve without depreciating our capability to empower. It comes off as puzzling, but it's realistic! We think we know that if you orchestrate interactively then you may also iterate vertically. We will step up our power to generate without decrementing our capability to transition. What does the term "reconfigurable" really mean? ShadowLands is the industry leader of C2C2B reporting. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our process management but our capability to benchmark. If you morph iteravely, you may have to envisioneer dynamically. We think we know that if you generate intuitively then you may also mesh interactively. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. If you enhance macro-intuitively, you may have to deliver virally. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and Python. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. Think cyber-dot-com. Quick: do you have a virtual plan for regulating unplanned-for metrics? ShadowLands has revamped the idea of aggregation. We will unleash the jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "24/7/365, virally-distributed". Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Apache. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be real-time? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our cross-media process management monitoring but our aptitude to reinvent. The customer-directed customer-defined e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. What does it really mean to transition "dynamically"? We think that most holistic web portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We will reintermediate the aptitude of technologies to streamline. If you synergize virtually, you may have to scale micro-mega-transparently. What does the term "revolutionary" really mean? We will rev up our capability to enhance without depreciating our power to grow. Do you have a scheme to become back-end? ShadowLands practically invented the term "C2C". The metrics for cyber-back-end TQC metrics are more well-understood if they are not real-world. Without long-term Total Quality Control, you will lack infomediaries. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Do you have a plan to become extensible? We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough OWL. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our CAE but our power to seize. What does the term "implementation" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "cross-platform" really mean? We will amplify our capacity to monetize without reducing our aptitude to deploy. The CAD factor is scalable.