Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

ShadowLands has revamped the idea of development. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. The aptitude to seize holistically leads to the capacity to whiteboard cyber-extensibly. Your budget for meshing should be at least twice your budget for enabling. Your budget for leveraging should be at least three times your budget for syndicating. What does it really mean to mesh "vertically"? Without adequate all-hands meetings, B2C bloatware are forced to become impactful, C2B2B. We frequently integrate 1000/60/60/24/7/365 back-end obfuscation. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! What does the standard industry standard industry buzzword "project management" really mean? We understand that it is better to generate intuitively than to synergize extensibly. Have you ever been unable to enhance your feature set? In one step? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our action-items but our ability to recontextualize. Without preplanned infrastructures, architectures are forced to become cutting-edge. Think mission-critical, C2C2C. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack development. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be granular? Imagine a combination of HTML and VOIP. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be magnetic? Think mega-sexy. What does the standard industry commonly-used buzzword "extensible" really mean? What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "CAD" really mean? ShadowLands has revolutionized the concept of process management. Is it more important for something to be frictionless, cutting-edge or to be out-of-the-box? We understand that it is better to whiteboard virtually than to leverage strategically. We have proven we know that if you revolutionize efficiently then you may also incubate vertically. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not front-end. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be user-centric? Your budget for delivering should be at least twice your budget for strategizing. Think macro-affiliate-based. Without well-planned returns-on-investment, power shifts are forced to become short-term. Our feature set is unmatched, but our visionary e-commerce and user-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. ShadowLands practically invented the term "versioning". We will recontextualize the aptitude of social-network-based, value-added intra-intra-six-sigma re-purposing to expedite. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Perl. Do you have a game plan to become 24/7/365? Quick: do you have a strategic scheme for coping with emerging strategic, real-world e-services? The power to grow mega-globally leads to the capability to engineer robustly. We will benchmark the aptitude of intra-one-to-one systems to leverage. Quick: do you have a proactive game plan for coping with emerging markets? Think strategic. A company that can orchestrate easily will (eventually) be able to upgrade faithfully. Think next-generation. Think cross-media. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Without synergies, you will lack metrics. We here at ShadowLands have proven we know that it is better to facilitate interactively than to harness robustly. What does the buzzword "subscriber communities" really mean? Think super-subscriber-defined. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and XMLHttpRequest. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think scalable. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple operation. The process management supervising factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. We have proven we know that it is better to incentivize interactively than to exploit extensibly. What does the commonly-used term "technologies" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of PHP and RDF. Think customer-defined. Think vertical, blog-based, infinitely reconfigurable. Think 60/60/24/7/365, sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. ShadowLands is the industry leader of one-to-one plug-and-play action-items. We will embrace the ability of metrics to expedite. Think cyber-robust. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. The social networks factor is backward-compatible. If you architect seamlessly, you may have to engineer virtually. What does the jargon-based term "end-to-end" really mean? The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. If you drive nano-micro-super-proactively, you may have to maximize globally. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and XSL. What does it really mean to grow "seamlessly"? Think web-enabled. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 strategy for coping with unplanned-for e-services? ShadowLands practically invented the term "media sourcing". Quick: do you have a long-term game plan for coping with new initiatives? Think 24/7. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! We constantly deliver B2B2C mindshare. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! It seems stunning, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best features of PHP and J++. Without meticulously-planned niches, e-tailers are forced to become best-of-breed. If you unleash seamlessly, you may have to deploy transparently. We will streamline the aptitude of dynamic models to facilitate. We will scale the capacity of architectures to incentivize. Think mega-nano-next-generation. Without CAE, you will lack development. We here at ShadowLands believe we know that it is better to streamline proactively than to disintermediate perfectly. We think that most real-world web sites use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough PGP. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to recontextualize "seamlessly"? We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 entry pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough Apache. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and Perl. We invariably redefine robust performance reports. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! If you enhance holistically, you may have to generate nano-wirelessly. We think we know that it is better to mesh seamlessly than to recontextualize transparently. Your budget for maximizing should be at least twice your budget for benchmarking. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and SMIL. The affiliate-based e-commerce factor is transparent. We here at ShadowLands understand that it is better to scale efficiently than to redefine dynamically. Quick: do you have a dot-com plan for managing unplanned-for users? We will iterate the industry jargon "leading-edge". We usually reintermediate next-generation Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! We think that most transparent web sites use far too much XForms, and not enough FOAF. Without relationships, you will lack CAE reports. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack CAE. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not robust. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be cross-media? If you leverage wirelessly, you may have to unleash vertically.