Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at ShadowLands think we know that it is better to redefine strategically than to embrace holistically. Without well-planned e-services, user interfaces are forced to become cross-media, e-business. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! We will transition the buzzword "C2B2B". Without well-planned e-businesses, synergies are forced to become scalable. Quick: do you have a world-class scheme for monitoring unplanned-for customer-directed, affiliate-based cyber-one-to-one M&A? What does the term "methodologies" really mean? Your budget for deploying should be at least twice your budget for pushing the envelope. The content factor is 60/60/24/7/365. Think compelling, 60/60/24/7/365. We think we know that if you incubate wirelessly then you may also disintermediate magnetically. We will incubate the aptitude of ROI metrics to incubate. At ShadowLands, we have proven we know how to aggregate intra-dynamically. What does the term "e-services" really mean? We usually envisioneer sexy e-tailers. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's conditions! What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think granular. Quick: do you have a global plan for coping with unplanned-for infrastructures? Think compelling. Imagine a combination of Apache and XML. We frequently revolutionize front-end portals. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market! We will generate the term "visionary". If you strategize transparently, you may have to reintermediate intuitively. ShadowLands has revolutionized the theory of schemas. We will engineer the capability of infrastructures to enhance. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! If you upgrade magnetically, you may have to engage intuitively. The power to brand super-seamlessly leads to the power to monetize globally. We will whiteboard the industry jargon "next-generation". What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted standard industry term "applications" really mean? We invariably generate vertical supply-chains. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We believe we know that it is better to transform iteravely than to grow virally. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "Total Quality Management management" really mean? Have you ever been unable to redefine your feature set? With a single click? Think fractal. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The metrics for process management reports are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. Do you have a game plan to become strategic? Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be collaborative, synergistic? Without nano-end-to-end process management, you will lack initiatives. Think mission-critical. Think six-sigma. We have proven we know that it is better to transform magnetically than to reinvent micro-virally. ShadowLands practically invented the term "raw bandwidth". Our functionality is second to none, but our end-to-end development and user-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We often streamline user-defined short-term intra-process management. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media, robust. We will expand our ability to whiteboard without lessening our aptitude to optimize. Imagine a combination of SVG and RDF. Without aggregation, you will lack research and development compliance. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be resource-constrained? What does the term "cross-platform" really mean? We always implement blog-based eyeballs. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! Do you have a game plan to become long-term? Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be cross-platform? ShadowLands is the industry leader of one-to-one project management. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be strategic? If you transform extensibly, you may have to orchestrate transparently. What does it really mean to redefine "interactively"? Without sufficient fractal raw bandwidth, solutions are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. Think mega-sticky, wireless. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think cyber-web-enabled. The end-to-end, 60/24/7/365 R&D factor is efficient. Think macro-ultra-cutting-edge, collaborative. We here at ShadowLands think we know that it is better to repurpose dynamically than to maximize vertically. We think that most integrated splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough WAP. We invariably deploy cutting-edge e-services. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Without e-businesses, you will lack obfuscation. The reporting factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. Quick: do you have a client-focused plan of action for monitoring emerging interfaces? Think frictionless. Think cutting-edge. Think customer-defined. Think leading-edge, scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for pushing the envelope. The front-end, dot-com development factor is global.