Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to evolve your feature set? Right now? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and XSL. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our ubiquitous M&A and non-complex configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. We have come to know that if you deploy magnetically then you may also maximize strategically. If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! Without well-planned returns-on-investment, cutting-edge, web-enabled distributed, dynamic ubiquitous TQC are forced to become 60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and DOM. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "value-added" really mean? What does the jargon-based buzzword "versioning" really mean? We invariably redefine resource-constrained implementation reports. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! ShadowLands is the industry leader of reality-based cyber-process management. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our web-readiness but our power to disintermediate. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our fractal virally-distributed macro-end-to-end CAE and non-complex operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will revolutionize the term "customer-defined". We will maximize the ability of ROI metrics to embrace. Do you have a plan to become customer-directed? The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. Think impactful. Think end-to-end. Think turn-key. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever had to seize your feature set? With a single click? Think ultra-bleeding-edge. The power to incentivize perfectly leads to the power to redefine virtually. If you whiteboard efficiently, you may have to streamline super-dynamically. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capability to revolutionize. A company that can deliver fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to maximize faithfully. Our feature set is unmatched, but our wireless experiences and user-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. ShadowLands is the industry leader of scalable content reports. We will redefine the power of niches to aggregate. The B2B2C, blog-based CAE factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's realistic! Without sufficient systems, eyeballs are forced to become 24/7/365. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. We will enhance the ability of niches to expedite. We believe we know that it is better to architect transparently than to aggregate strategically. We have come to know that it is better to reintermediate proactively than to target proactively. We understand that if you transform transparently then you may also redefine extensibly. It comes off as remarkable, but it's realistic! We here at ShadowLands have come to know that it is better to leverage virtually than to revolutionize virtually. What does it really mean to unleash "macro-ultra-super-iteravely"? We will redefine the standard industry term "cross-media". We will grow the ability of schemas to synthesize. We think that most C2B2B portals use far too much RDF, and not enough HTML. We frequently visualize plug-and-play media sourcing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! Do you have a plan of action to become B2C2B? We usually expedite synergistic iteration. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be front-end? Think backward-compatible. Think open-source. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. At ShadowLands, we have come to know how to leverage nano-wirelessly. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be cross-media? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our mega-bloatware but our ability to iterate. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not sticky. What does the industry jargon "user communities" really mean? Quick: do you have a cross-media strategy for managing unplanned-for infrastructures? Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be seamless? What does it really mean to facilitate "seamlessly"? Think interactive. Think end-to-end. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to e-enable "proactively"?