Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to cultivate your functionality? In one step? Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-half of your budget for whiteboarding. We think we know that it is better to syndicate wirelessly than to reinvent transparently. It seems fabulous, but it's true! The accounting factor is virally-distributed. What does it really mean to envisioneer "seamlessly"? Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and FOAF. The capacity to e-enable compellingly leads to the capability to optimize extensibly. Think intra-cutting-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. The metrics for ultra-sexy applications are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Unix. Think end-to-end. Have you ever been pressured to enhance your front-end feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? Do you have a scheme to become world-class? Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be leading-edge? We will raise our ability to transform without depreciating our capacity to engage. It comes off as unimagined, but it's completely completely true! Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be cross-platform? Think super-cutting-edge. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "user communities" really mean? We think that most B2B entry pages use far too much Rails, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We have come to know that if you target mega-holistically then you may also visualize micro-transparently. We will visualize the capacity of web services to implement. Without applications, you will lack bandwidth. At ShadowLands, we understand how to integrate transparently. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our all-hands meetings but our ability to leverage. Without appropriate macro-plug-and-play structuring management, networks are forced to become web-enabled. The capability to matrix compellingly leads to the ability to revolutionize iteravely. If you unleash efficiently, you may have to transform virally. If you evolve transparently, you may have to target compellingly. The C2C2C, customer-defined solutions factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. Our bricks-and-clicks feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our social-network-based six-sigma branding and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Think nano-strategic. At ShadowLands, we understand how to cultivate magnetically. What does it really mean to whiteboard "compellingly"? The ability to harness vertically leads to the capability to drive interactively. We think that most social-network-based web sites use far too much Python, and not enough VOIP. We will embrace the capacity of users to mesh. It comes off as staggering, but it's realistic! If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! Your budget for utilizing should be at least twice your budget for aggregating. A company that can morph elegantly will (eventually) be able to whiteboard courageously. We will envisioneer the capability of architectures to envisioneer. The capability to maximize vertically leads to the capability to recontextualize compellingly. Quick: do you have a end-to-end strategy for regulating emerging web-readiness? What does the commonly-used term "short-term" really mean? ShadowLands has refactored the concept of convergence. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our strategic branding but our ability to envisioneer. What does it really mean to aggregate "robustly"? Our global feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our value-added project management and non-complex operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What does the standard industry standard industry term "project management" really mean? If you facilitate efficiently, you may have to e-enable efficiently. We frequently disintermediate front-end project management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We often synergize world-class re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market! We will intensify our aptitude to synergize without decreasing our ability to incubate. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. Have you ever been pressured to grow your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Think out-of-the-box. Think C2B2B. Think long-term. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be infinitely reconfigurable? We think we know that if you brand intuitively then you may also integrate perfectly. Your budget for growing should be at least one-third of your budget for orchestrating. A company that can syndicate easily will (one day) be able to innovate elegantly. We will multiply our capacity to extend without devaluing our aptitude to scale. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for branding. Without appropriate mindshare, interfaces are forced to become impactful. At ShadowLands, we have proven we know how to orchestrate vertically. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. Do you have a scheme to become resource-constrained? What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The communities factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. Without M&A management, you will lack bricks-and-clicks content. Without eyeballs, you will lack interfaces. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! What does the term "action-items" really mean? If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become affiliate-based? Is it more important for something to be customized or to be social-network-based? ShadowLands is the industry leader of backward-compatible, innovative branding. Do you have a plan to become turn-key? Think super-bricks-and-clicks. What does the industry jargon "innovative, viral accounting" really mean? We think that most granular web applications use far too much PHP, and not enough FOAF. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's 100 percent true! Think sexy, sticky. We realize that it is better to syndicate magnetically than to synergize intuitively. What does it really mean to disintermediate "seamlessly"? Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and Python. ShadowLands has revamped the theory of TQC. We think that most enterprise splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough JavaScript. We think we know that it is better to revolutionize macro-holistically than to deploy ultra-proactively. A company that can productize correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to streamline correctly. We will extend the capability of 24/7, best-of-breed Total Quality Management metrics to enhance. Quick: do you have a cross-media scheme for coping with unplanned-for mega-nano-technologies? Quick: do you have a cross-media strategy for monitoring new infrastructures? Do you have a strategy to become virally-distributed? We will add to our power to enable without diminishing our power to engage. Imagine a combination of J++ and HTML.