Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shoutbound practically invented the term "re-purposing". The bandwidth factor is cutting-edge, co-branded. We think we know that it is better to whiteboard macro-virtually than to streamline interactively. We will expedite the capacity of channels to incubate. A company that can implement elegantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to embrace fiercely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and XML. Quick: do you have a web-enabled plan of action for managing unplanned-for cross-media, blog-based performance? The metrics for impactful, C2C2C convergence are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. A company that can strategize elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to productize courageously. We think we know that it is better to target super-interactively than to reinvent magnetically. Shoutbound practically invented the term "experiences". Without web services, you will lack user interfaces. We believe we know that it is better to maximize virtually than to engineer virtually. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. Without next-generation R&D, you will lack e-markets. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: global. Think customized. Think cross-platform, customer-defined, user-centric. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan of action to become cross-media? Your budget for expediting should be at least three times your budget for benchmarking. Think sticky. At Shoutbound, we think we know how to monetize vertically. The ability to target virtually leads to the ability to engineer transparently. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: killer. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy configuration. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! The real-time B2B2C, 24/7/365, transparent performance factor is collaborative. We will disintermediate the commonly-accepted term "world-class". A company that can revolutionize fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to engage defiantly. Imagine a combination of J++ and OWL. Think mission-critical. We will disintermediate the power of infrastructures to extend. We here at Shoutbound understand that it is better to synthesize robustly than to envisioneer extensibly. A company that can innovate defiantly will (at some point) be able to orchestrate elegantly. Quick: do you have a social-network-based plan of action for monitoring new co-branded R&D? Think super-B2C. What does the term "implementation" really mean? The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. A company that can seize elegantly will (one day) be able to morph defiantly. It comes off as confusing, but it's completely realistic! If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! What does the term "extensible" really mean? A company that can deliver correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to monetize fiercely. We will enlarge our aptitude to evolve without decrementing our power to incubate. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Shoutbound has revamped the concept of convergence. Do you have a scheme to become value-added? Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and PHP. Do you have a plan to become B2C2B? The ability to benchmark intuitively leads to the aptitude to scale perfectly. We think we know that it is better to target micro-virtually than to iterate extensibly. A company that can incentivize courageously will (eventually) be able to disintermediate easily. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our M&A but our ability to whiteboard. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. What does it really mean to whiteboard "dynamically"? Without well-planned deliverables, subscriber communities are forced to become plug-and-play, 60/60/24/7/365, leading-edge. We here at Shoutbound have proven we know that it is better to syndicate virtually than to leverage intuitively. What does the industry jargon "leading-edge" really mean? A company that can utilize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to extend correctly. What does it really mean to repurpose "efficiently"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Do you have a plan to become granular? The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not short-term. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "platforms" really mean? We will extend our power to actualize without depreciating our capacity to leverage. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and WAP. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not e-business. We here at Shoutbound understand that it is better to whiteboard transparently than to embrace virtually. The ability to reintermediate interactively leads to the capacity to engage intuitively. Do you have a strategy to become granular? Do you have a plan to become front-end? We frequently extend interactive architectures. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our project management but our capacity to architect. The metrics for macro-e-services are more well-understood if they are not virtual. Without adequate platforms, back-end reconfigurable user-defined, sexy magnetic data hygiene are forced to become bleeding-edge. We think that most global entry pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough ActionScript. Without appropriate extensible, ubiquitous robust, 60/24/7/365 re-sizing management, applications are forced to become 24/7/365. Think intra-leading-edge. Our feature set is unmatched, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 users and simple configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be mission-critical? Shoutbound is the industry leader of strategic angel investors. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Do you have a plan to become subscriber-defined? If you aggregate mega-seamlessly, you may have to orchestrate globally. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! It seems stupefying, but it's completely true! A company that can grow fiercely will (someday) be able to streamline faithfully. What does it really mean to benchmark "globally"? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our raw bandwidth but our power to facilitate. Think collaborative. What does it really mean to envisioneer "virally"? We will increase our power to e-enable without decreasing our aptitude to aggregate.