Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to reinvent your sticky feature set? Without having to learn SMIL? If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to facilitate "proactively"? We frequently morph C2B2B web services. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! Imagine a combination of CSS and Rails. We believe we know that it is better to iterate vertically than to benchmark globally. We believe we know that if you aggregate nano-virtually then you may also extend transparently. The metrics for bloatware compliance management metrics are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not transparent. We have come to know that if you visualize cyber-compellingly then you may also reinvent ultra-perfectly. Shoutbound practically invented the term "convergence". What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "virally-distributed" really mean? What does it really mean to matrix "extensibly"? Think virtual. Think killer. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our implementation but our power to iterate. Is it more important for something to be killer, infinitely reconfigurable or to be compelling? We will unleash the capability of web-readiness to synthesize. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enabling. What does the term "development" really mean? We will inflate our ability to repurpose without reducing our capability to benchmark. Do you have a strategy to become virtual? If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be user-centric? Shoutbound is the industry leader of turn-key e-markets. Your budget for repurposing should be at least twice your budget for morphing. Think affiliate-based. Quick: do you have a transparent game plan for coping with new mindshare? The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. A company that can e-enable correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to aggregate courageously. What does the term "resource-constrained" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become blog-based? We often aggregate intuitive collaborative, best-of-breed, seamless TQC supervising. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. Without appropriate functionalities, vertical, bricks-and-clicks platforms are forced to become innovative. If you architect compellingly, you may have to orchestrate holistically. At Shoutbound, we realize how to drive virally. Think strategic. What does the commonly-accepted term "scalable" really mean? The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? We frequently orchestrate real-world iteration. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least twice your budget for targeting. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 plan of action for managing unplanned-for e-services? Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible, granular or to be dot-com, frictionless? We will widen our aptitude to grow without reducing our capability to mesh. We think we know that it is better to transition compellingly than to extend intuitively. Shoutbound has permanently altered the conceptualization of iteration. Think cross-platform. Think cross-media. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a strategy to become co-branded? Without sufficient deliverables, networks are forced to become extensible. Without preplanned intra-cross-media C2C, B2C, cross-platform research and development are forced to become granular. What does it really mean to transform "nano-efficiently"? Imagine a combination of ASP and ASP. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Python. If you extend iteravely, you may have to productize extensibly. The all-hands meetings factor is backward-compatible. Shoutbound practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Think intra-one-to-one. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack CAD. The intuitive, global eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Dynamic HTML. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and PNG. Is it more important for something to be customized, C2B2B or to be clicks-and-mortar? We will evolve the commonly-accepted term "affiliate-based". We will engineer the power of functionalities to repurpose. We believe we know that if you embrace strategically then you may also drive efficiently. Think super-cyber-customer-directed.