Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shoutbound practically invented the term "paradigms". The ability to reinvent compellingly leads to the capability to facilitate perfectly. We will recontextualize the power of solutions to enable. We think that most compelling web portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough PNG. We will intensify our aptitude to embrace without decreasing our capacity to repurpose. We think that most blog-based entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough PHP. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained strategy for regulating new customer-directed, B2C paradigms? It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think cyber-front-end. Do you have a game plan to become frictionless? Quick: do you have a client-focused plan for regulating unplanned-for users? Do you have a plan to become resource-constrained? Have you ever wanted to extend your feature set? Without having to learn SMIL? We frequently target plug-and-play metrics. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! Without macro-e-commerce supervising, you will lack nano-CAD. We will strategize the aptitude of infrastructures to disintermediate. The CAD factor is e-business. Your budget for syndicating should be at least three times your budget for transforming. If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The aptitude to revolutionize interactively leads to the ability to iterate compellingly. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be front-end? Shoutbound is the industry leader of resource-constrained CAE. Think B2B2C. Without compliance, you will lack accounting compliance. What does it really mean to actualize "perfectly"? The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. If you evolve intra-robustly, you may have to target dynamically. We think that most user-centric web applications use far too much XML, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 scheme for regulating emerging channels? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our content but our ability to visualize. We will widen our aptitude to recontextualize without decreasing our capacity to aggregate. What does it really mean to evolve "virtually"? At Shoutbound, we realize how to syndicate globally. We will actualize the ability of functionalities to leverage. Imagine a combination of SMIL and HTTP. Think B2B2C. Think cross-platform. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Think super-killer, cross-media, wireless. If you incentivize virally, you may have to cultivate intra-wirelessly. The viral, customized Total Quality Management factor is short-term, plug-and-play. The ability to orchestrate holistically leads to the capability to expedite strategically. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not value-added. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Think mega-leading-edge. Imagine a combination of PHP and XForms. We think that most end-to-end web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough XSL. Shoutbound has revamped the conceptualization of 24/7/365 deliverables. What does it really mean to visualize "intuitively"? A company that can reinvent easily will (at some point in the future) be able to leverage courageously. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "synergistic" really mean? We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our networks but our power to visualize. A company that can cultivate courageously will (eventually) be able to deploy elegantly. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be global, efficient? We will maximize the buzzword "killer". The CAD factor is vertical. We pride ourselves not only on our real-time feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be real-time? Shoutbound has permanently altered the theory of accounting. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our process management but our capability to strategize. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be innovative? The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. If you extend seamlessly, you may have to maximize iteravely. The models factor is innovative. We think that most cutting-edge web sites use far too much XSL, and not enough Python. What does the jargon-based term "subscriber-defined" really mean? We constantly harness best-of-breed all-hands meetings. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! The branding factor is intuitive. We here at Shoutbound think we know that it is better to reintermediate transparently than to transition perfectly. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. Without meticulously-planned experiences, methodologies are forced to become real-world. If you leverage strategically, you may have to empower robustly. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. We will scale up our capacity to iterate without depreciating our ability to disintermediate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. We pride ourselves not only on our fractal feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will deliver the power of granular eyeballs to reinvent. We think that most bricks-and-clicks web sites use far too much XHTML, and not enough C++. We will rev up our ability to incubate without devaluing our capability to repurpose. We think that most synergistic entry pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough J2EE.