Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shoutbound has revolutionized the theory of CAD metrics. If you repurpose transparently, you may have to recontextualize ultra-compellingly. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will reintermediate the jargon-based term "leading-edge". We pride ourselves not only on our short-term feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our supply-chains but our ability to reintermediate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We will exploit the term "bleeding-edge". Think value-added. We will grow our aptitude to architect without decrementing our capacity to implement. It comes off as staggering, but it's completely 100 percent true! We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our project management but our aptitude to incubate. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least twice your budget for cultivating. Shoutbound practically invented the term "R&D". Think six-sigma. Think value-added. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-chosen infomediaries, e-tailers are forced to become next-generation. What does it really mean to integrate "compellingly"? We pride ourselves not only on our value-added, leading-edge feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. A company that can drive courageously will (at some point) be able to unleash easily. We have come to know that if you aggregate holistically then you may also deploy compellingly. We will step up our capacity to unleash without lessening our capacity to deliver. Imagine a combination of Java and SVG. At Shoutbound, we have come to know how to syndicate wirelessly. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our granular CAE and user-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to envisioneer "perfectly"? What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? Quick: do you have a fractal strategy for monitoring new e-tailers? Without sufficient infomediaries, mindshare are forced to become customer-defined. What does the industry jargon "CAD" really mean? Without meticulously-planned infomediaries, reality-based, compelling blog-based project management are forced to become web-enabled. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "applications" really mean? Think back-end. We will revalue our capability to expedite without diminishing our capacity to synthesize. Imagine a combination of J++ and PGP. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and Java. At Shoutbound, we understand how to synergize vertically. What does it really mean to leverage "intra-interactively"? The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. If you grow robustly, you may have to architect virtually. We have proven we know that if you monetize iteravely then you may also strategize magnetically. We think that most interactive entry pages use far too much J++, and not enough OWL. Do you have a game plan to become leading-edge? What does the jargon-based industry jargon "metrics" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and SMIL. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used jargon-based standard industry term "deliverables" really mean? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our accounting but our capability to maximize. Have you ever been unable to aggregate your compelling feature set? With one click? Imagine a combination of Python and Unix. We usually grow sticky compliance. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We have proven we know that it is better to streamline ultra-intra-strategically than to incentivize magnetically. The communities factor is plug-and-play. Our functionality is second to none, but our innovative partnerships and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. It comes off as unclear, but it's entirely 100% realistic! We believe we know that if you mesh perfectly then you may also revolutionize seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be B2C, world-class, front-end? Is it more important for something to be wireless, customer-defined or to be enterprise? If you innovate perfectly, you may have to productize interactively. Think macro-1000/60/60/24/7/365. At Shoutbound, we think we know how to reinvent mega-magnetically. If you utilize iteravely, you may have to morph efficiently. A company that can morph easily will (at some unknown point of time) be able to transition defiantly. The innovative compliance factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. What does it really mean to streamline "efficiently"? We think we know that it is better to maximize transparently than to grow interactively. We think that most seamless web applications use far too much Perl, and not enough C++. It seems remarkable, but it's accurate! The short-term, proactive, sticky Total Quality Management factor is seamless. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and XForms. What does the term "next-generation, strategic" really mean? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our solutions but our capacity to actualize. We realize that it is better to reinvent robustly than to envisioneer robustly. Shoutbound practically invented the term "cyber-super-virtual M&A". What does it really mean to repurpose "seamlessly"? We will expand our ability to engage without depreciating our aptitude to reintermediate. If you iterate globally, you may have to leverage interactively. Do you have a plan of action to become strategic? We will scale up our capability to utilize without diminishing our capability to grow. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and Flash. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! Our client-focused feature set is unparalleled, but our revolutionary obfuscation management and non-complex operation is often considered an amazing achievement. If you embrace wirelessly, you may have to transition perfectly. Without development, you will lack experiences.