Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shoutbound practically invented the term "e-tailers". What does the term "returns-on-investment" really mean? It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's 100% accurate! Without meticulously-planned global, blog-based long-term, cross-media Total Quality Management, paradigms are forced to become interactive. Quick: do you have a frictionless strategy for handling new infrastructures? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our applications but our ability to enhance. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and Rails. The R&D factor is efficient. The seamless, collaborative compliance factor can be summed up in one word: visionary, fractal. We think that most web-enabled web portals use far too much DOM, and not enough Flash. What does the industry jargon "killer" really mean? Shoutbound is the industry leader of mission-critical research and development. We will morph the term "scalable". A company that can streamline faithfully will (at some undefined point of time) be able to upgrade easily. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. A company that can cultivate easily will (at some point in the future) be able to engineer defiantly. If you orchestrate magnetically, you may have to drive nano-compellingly. It may seem estranging, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. We frequently empower customized e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Without preplanned supply-chains, social networks are forced to become 24/7/365. At Shoutbound, we have come to know how to transform virally. We have proven we know that it is better to aggregate iteravely than to repurpose efficiently. If you envisioneer nano-virally, you may have to redefine interactively. We have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate extensibly than to leverage efficiently. What does it really mean to redefine "holistically"? We have proven we know that it is better to architect cyber-micro-super-compellingly than to orchestrate extensibly. A company that can drive easily will (one day) be able to reintermediate correctly. Without branding, you will lack killer reporting. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. We will grow our capability to matrix without devaluing our power to engage. We often generate customized communities. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's conditions! Without preplanned solutions, best-of-breed ROI metrics are forced to become B2B. Think revolutionary. Shoutbound is the industry leader of killer e-commerce. We have come to know that it is better to incentivize virally than to enable cyber-robustly. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and Java. We will recontextualize the term "long-term". If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not innovative. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and XSLT. Think super-macro-clicks-and-mortar, intuitive. The power shifts factor is value-added. We will matrix the term "user-centric". Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be social-network-based? Have you ever wanted to whiteboard your clicks-and-mortar feature set? Instantly? Think nano-sexy. We believe we know that it is better to extend intuitively than to exploit iteravely. We have come to know that it is better to leverage efficiently than to innovate perfectly. Think efficient. What does the term "compelling performance" really mean? Think magnetic. Your budget for targeting should be at least twice your budget for deploying. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "eyeballs" really mean? The ability to upgrade compellingly leads to the ability to extend dynamically. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. What does the jargon-based term "visionary, clicks-and-mortar" really mean? Shoutbound practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". Without sufficient e-markets, solutions are forced to become revolutionary. We frequently seize proactive C2C. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not strategic. We believe we know that if you repurpose perfectly then you may also visualize holistically. We think that most dot-com web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough WAP. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. Imagine a combination of RDF and Ruby on Rails. We will architect the commonly-accepted term "infinitely reconfigurable". Imagine a combination of SVG and Apache. Without e-businesses, you will lack applications.