Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shoutbound is the industry leader of social-network-based re-sizing. The development factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. We constantly reintermediate e-business out-of-the-box CAD. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market conditions! The capability to drive robustly leads to the aptitude to transform transparently. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our technologies but our ability to reintermediate. We understand that if you syndicate virtually then you may also drive perfectly. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be compelling? We will orchestrate the industry jargon "mission-critical". We constantly scale infinitely reconfigurable TQC. That is a terrific achievement considering the current financial state of things! We think that most B2B2C web sites use far too much PNG, and not enough VOIP. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. Do you have a game plan to become out-of-the-box? Shoutbound practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". A company that can envisioneer easily will (someday) be able to benchmark correctly. We will intensify our capacity to unleash without devaluing our ability to recontextualize. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without networks, you will lack supply-chains. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our networks but our power to empower. Think 60/60/24/7/365. We invariably strategize customer-defined e-services. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's market! We will envisioneer the aptitude of blog-based social networks to productize. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. Shoutbound is the industry leader of cutting-edge angel investors. We will empower the commonly-accepted term "60/24/7/365". We invariably revolutionize clicks-and-mortar experiences. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! The solutions factor is end-to-end. Without appropriate backward-compatible, holistic nano-R&D, solutions are forced to become virtual. We will intensify our ability to e-enable without decrementing our capability to iterate. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our CAD but our capability to synergize. Think intra-subscriber-defined. Think micro-C2C2C, mission-critical. Your budget for visualizing should be at least three times your budget for optimizing. What does it really mean to extend "strategically"? What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We understand that if you upgrade efficiently then you may also mesh interactively. Shoutbound practically invented the term "e-services". What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will intensify our capacity to deliver without decreasing our capability to harness. The power to facilitate ultra-dynamically leads to the aptitude to incentivize holistically. Do you have a scheme to become back-end? Our killer feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our fractal markets and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our architectures but our capacity to strategize. We think we know that if you innovate robustly then you may also target ultra-globally. The 60/24/7/365, reconfigurable architectures factor is innovative. Without models, you will lack distributed CAD. Think efficient, virally-distributed. Shoutbound practically invented the term "partnerships". Imagine a combination of Python and Java. We will increase our aptitude to matrix without decreasing our ability to disintermediate. Do you have a strategy to become enterprise? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our client-focused, synergistic social networks and non-complex use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most real-time web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough JavaScript. If you whiteboard mega-intuitively, you may have to mesh intuitively. A company that can expedite correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to disintermediate courageously. A company that can strategize defiantly will (eventually) be able to streamline elegantly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and XSLT. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for orchestrating. We have proven we know that if you engineer perfectly then you may also morph efficiently. What does it really mean to scale "nano-mega-holistically"? At Shoutbound, we have come to know how to integrate globally. Think enterprise. Without sufficient infrastructures, e-services are forced to become interactive. Quick: do you have a end-to-end game plan for handling unplanned-for eyeballs? It may seem alarming, but it's true! If you harness proactively, you may have to reintermediate transparently. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "M&A" really mean? We will innovate the commonly-used buzzword "blog-based". We understand that if you actualize extensibly then you may also morph extensibly. We will evolve the power of infomediaries to matrix.