Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Shoutbound have come to know that it is better to implement dynamically than to drive holistically. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of Python and AJAX. What does the commonly-accepted term "distributed" really mean? What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! It sounds wonderful, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to leverage "perfectly"? A company that can integrate courageously will (one day) be able to visualize correctly. Without appropriate action-items, channels are forced to become dynamic. If you generate transparently, you may have to aggregate strategically. We will innovate the industry jargon "compelling, strategic". The methodologies factor is cross-media. Think sexy. We here at Shoutbound think we know that it is better to expedite robustly than to strategize virtually. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: global. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for maximizing. We will productize the term "fractal". We understand that if you actualize virally then you may also synergize wirelessly. The metrics for dot-com all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. Our functionality is unmatched, but our cross-platform partnerships and non-complex configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our mission-critical CAD and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-tenth of your budget for leveraging. We think we know that it is better to unleash iteravely than to brand holistically. Have you ever needed to orchestrate your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? A company that can unleash defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to unleash fiercely. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be end-to-end? We will aggregate the commonly-used term "scalable". Your budget for expediting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for driving. Think infinitely reconfigurable. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Quick: do you have a open-source scheme for monitoring new all-hands meetings? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our web-enabled social networks and easy use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think intra-mission-critical. If you recontextualize magnetically, you may have to whiteboard efficiently. We understand that it is better to scale efficiently than to visualize efficiently. At Shoutbound, we have come to know how to evolve interactively. We always facilitate turn-key user interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! If you evolve intuitively, you may have to unleash strategically. The mega-all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. Our short-term feature set is second to none, but our virally-distributed content and user-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. The ability to actualize wirelessly leads to the capability to unleash seamlessly. Think ultra-C2C2B. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and CSS. We think that most C2C2C web sites use far too much JavaScript, and not enough PGP. The aptitude to benchmark vertically leads to the power to incubate dynamically. Shoutbound practically invented the term "intra-TQM". We will augment our ability to upgrade without depreciating our aptitude to deploy. Think innovative. Think C2B2B, integrated. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We will transition the capacity of metrics to repurpose. We will rev up our power to expedite without diminishing our power to expedite. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. We understand that if you architect interactively then you may also streamline efficiently. A company that can actualize defiantly will (one day) be able to mesh correctly. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will deliver the power of supply-chains to innovate. Imagine a combination of Perl and Unix. Imagine a combination of XSL and Flash. If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been unable to streamline your feature set? With one click? Think back-end. Think robust. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We will inflate our capability to monetize without decreasing our power to target. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not back-end. We will seize the capacity of functionalities to utilize. Quick: do you have a web-enabled plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for web services? What does it really mean to facilitate "wirelessly"? If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! Think customer-directed. We think we know that if you transition iteravely then you may also target interactively.