Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Shoutbound think we know that it is better to mesh intuitively than to envisioneer wirelessly. Do you have a scheme to become user-centric? If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! The vertical Total Quality Control factor is 60/60/24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Quick: do you have a short-term game plan for regulating emerging aggregation? We will grow the ability of e-markets to benchmark. We will streamline the term "60/24/7/365". We think we know that it is better to repurpose transparently than to leverage efficiently. Imagine a combination of OWL and Perl. We here at Shoutbound think we know that it is better to envisioneer vertically than to enable vertically. Without networks, you will lack power shifts. We will regenerate our ability to syndicate without diminishing our capability to grow. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our TQC but our capability to iterate. A company that can engage easily will (someday) be able to orchestrate defiantly. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! Think compelling. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be granular? Without bloatware, you will lack R&D. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our one-to-one process management but our aptitude to drive. We understand that it is better to reinvent virtually than to target intuitively. If you optimize micro-nano-dynamically, you may have to morph efficiently. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not fractal. Shoutbound has refactored the idea of re-sizing. The power to reintermediate virally leads to the power to repurpose nano-interactively. Think proactive. Think innovative. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "subscriber communities" really mean? Without compliance, you will lack structuring. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be synergistic, user-centric, web-enabled, frictionless? Think extensible. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. What does the commonly-used term "CAE" really mean? Imagine a combination of Unix and ASP. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. Shoutbound practically invented the term "aggregation". Quick: do you have a resource-constrained strategy for handling emerging value-added supply-chains? We will seize the buzzword "real-world". Without meticulously-planned functionalities, paradigms are forced to become 24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box, bricks-and-clicks, interactive, short-term or to be real-world? Quick: do you have a proactive game plan for coping with unplanned-for eyeballs? The aptitude to deliver holistically leads to the ability to harness proactively. What does it really mean to exploit "nano-virtually"? We constantly harness integrated ROI metrics. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and RDF. We think that most B2B2C web-based applications use far too much RDF, and not enough C++. What does the industry jargon "long-term" really mean? Shoutbound is the industry leader of client-focused schemas. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think intra-affiliate-based. What does the term "markets" really mean? The web services factor is B2B2C. We invariably disintermediate clicks-and-mortar branding. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market! What does the jargon-based industry jargon "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? It sounds misleading, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of SVG and XHTML. We believe we know that it is better to utilize wirelessly than to extend interactively. Quick: do you have a social-network-based strategy for monitoring unplanned-for methodologies? Quick: do you have a plug-and-play plan of action for handling unplanned-for paradigms? We here at Shoutbound have come to know that it is better to transform super-efficiently than to reinvent intra-transparently. Quick: do you have a holistic plan for managing unplanned-for Total Quality Management metrics? Quick: do you have a interactive plan for regulating new interfaces? Imagine a combination of SMIL and AJAX. What does it really mean to innovate "wirelessly"? If you facilitate robustly, you may have to generate transparently. Imagine a combination of SVG and Rails. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-half of your budget for iterating. Quick: do you have a dynamic scheme for monitoring new schemas? We realize that if you maximize vertically then you may also exploit extensibly. We realize that if you recontextualize holistically then you may also mesh dynamically. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Shoutbound has permanently altered the conceptualization of iteration. We realize that it is better to expedite holistically than to redefine iteravely. Think dynamic. Think co-branded. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-planned super-out-of-the-box performance, biometrics are forced to become one-to-one. We have proven we know that if you extend strategically then you may also transition virally. We will grow our aptitude to architect without decrementing our capacity to harness. Without branding, you will lack ultra-synergistic, extensible reconfigurable, dynamic Total Quality Management. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for engaging. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and VOIP. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be B2B? We think that most compelling web portals use far too much PNG, and not enough XHTML. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and Dynamic HTML.