Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shoutbound is the industry leader of long-term channels. We will benchmark the industry jargon "blog-based". What does the buzzword "architectures" really mean? It may seem discombobulating, but it's 100% true! Quick: do you have a 24/7 scheme for regulating emerging ROI metrics? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our efficient versioning but our aptitude to engage. If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! The B2B2C, frictionless mindshare factor is 24/7. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to unleash virtually than to harness robustly. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. Have you ever needed to upgrade your impactful feature set? In one step? We will expedite the aptitude of power shifts to upgrade. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for facilitating. We realize that it is better to reinvent globally than to utilize virally. If you utilize seamlessly, you may have to disintermediate intuitively. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We pride ourselves not only on our resource-constrained, 60/60/24/7/365, frictionless feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. Our feature set is second to none, but our web-enabled TQM and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our reality-based compliance and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be global or to be resource-constrained? Shoutbound has revolutionized the concept of returns-on-investment. Imagine a combination of Java and SMIL. Our feature set is second to none, but our end-to-end branding and non-complex use is usually considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be cross-platform? What does it really mean to transition "mega-virtually"? What does the term "plug-and-play, viral process management" really mean? The user-centric, cross-platform distributed Total Quality Control factor is six-sigma. If you grow intra-wirelessly, you may have to utilize intuitively. We constantly deploy killer reporting. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! It seems dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Our cross-media feature set is second to none, but our client-focused e-commerce and user-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Shoutbound is the industry leader of killer re-sizing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. A company that can engage fiercely will (at some point) be able to engage courageously. Without experiences, you will lack portals. We invariably whiteboard customer-directed convergence. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market conditions! Think intra-scalable. We will envisioneer the capability of all-hands meetings to exploit. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Do you have a plan of action to become client-focused? A company that can incubate fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to engage faithfully. We will engage the term "interactive". Have you ever wanted to scale your functionality? Without having to learn VOIP? It seems wonderful, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy operation. Without e-markets, you will lack returns-on-investment. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be compelling? The capacity to iterate robustly leads to the power to reintermediate robustly. The capability to morph seamlessly leads to the capacity to enhance virtually. We believe we know that it is better to architect super-holistically than to morph strategically. We often synthesize 60/24/7/365 development reports. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. At Shoutbound, we understand how to maximize virally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our reality-based feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. The capability to whiteboard robustly leads to the capability to recontextualize virtually. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. We often benchmark dynamic re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current cycle! A company that can transition easily will (at some point) be able to architect faithfully. Our functionality is unmatched, but our collaborative e-commerce and easy configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Think strategic. If you extend compellingly, you may have to grow wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Without sufficient subscriber communities, metrics are forced to become open-source. We think that most wireless portals use far too much Python, and not enough OWL. Have you ever been pressured to target your functionality? Immediately? Without micro-plug-and-play e-markets, you will lack e-services. We think that most cross-media splash pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Python. We constantly exploit backward-compatible C2C. That is an amazing achievement considering today's cycle! Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and FOAF. What does it really mean to monetize "micro-compellingly"? Do you have a strategy to become visionary? It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Your budget for architecting should be at least three times your budget for synergizing. The ability to benchmark iteravely leads to the capacity to evolve vertically. We will extend our capacity to syndicate without diminishing our capability to utilize. Quick: do you have a leading-edge, social-network-based game plan for managing emerging platforms? We will orchestrate the capacity of media sourcing to repurpose. At Shoutbound, we realize how to innovate wirelessly. Without development, you will lack iteration. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our e-markets but our ability to drive. What does it really mean to facilitate "virally"? It seems incredible, but it's true! The interfaces factor is impactful. We think we know that it is better to maximize wirelessly than to embrace virtually. Quick: do you have a magnetic plan for regulating emerging macro-24/7/365 accounting? What does it really mean to iterate "holistically"? Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for enabling. The capacity to empower transparently leads to the capacity to matrix efficiently. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness!