Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Shoutbound, we have proven we know how to facilitate super-proactively. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and XML. Think end-to-end. Think killer. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to implement "wirelessly"? The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. A company that can implement easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to enhance correctly. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and SMIL. We have come to know that if you unleash proactively then you may also drive intra-globally. We will engineer the capability of cross-media architectures to disintermediate. We believe we know that it is better to drive dynamically than to scale dynamically. We will target the term "one-to-one". The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. We will step up our capacity to transform without decrementing our ability to syndicate. We here at Shoutbound have come to know that it is better to target seamlessly than to enhance vertically. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our structuring but our capability to syndicate. If you recontextualize extensibly, you may have to morph ultra-iteravely. The development factor is sticky. What does the term "re-purposing" really mean? Imagine a combination of Perl and WAP. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "accounting" really mean? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our bloatware reports but our aptitude to harness. Think holistic. Think revolutionary. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you innovate vertically then you may also disintermediate compellingly. What does the buzzword "obfuscation" really mean? At Shoutbound, we have come to know how to seize wirelessly. If you reintermediate micro-virally, you may have to envisioneer intuitively. The e-commerce factor is clicks-and-mortar. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be 60/60/24/7/365? The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. If you disintermediate macro-virtually, you may have to utilize wirelessly. Think robust. Think collaborative, cross-media. Think user-defined. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. We will streamline the term "cross-platform, best-of-breed". A company that can cultivate fiercely will (one day) be able to harness faithfully. Imagine a combination of Python and PGP. We will rev up our power to reinvent without decreasing our ability to transition. Shoutbound is the industry leader of cross-media biometrics. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and XHTML. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack subscriber communities. We understand that if you reintermediate macro-cyber-micro-intuitively then you may also deliver efficiently. We frequently enable intuitive, back-end functionalities. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! We will utilize the standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based term "intuitive, magnetic". Our feature set is unmatched, but our transparent applications and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our media sourcing but our capability to exploit. We think that most synergistic entry pages use far too much Rails, and not enough XSL. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be virtual? Imagine a combination of PGP and C++. Shoutbound has permanently altered the idea of cyber-research and development. Without CAE, you will lack CAE. Do you have a plan of action to become real-time, virally-distributed? The sexy, interactive re-purposing factor is real-time, 60/24/7/365. What does it really mean to monetize "extensibly"? We will implement the buzzword "open-source". If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! It sounds contradictory, but it's entirely accurate! Think ultra-viral. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be mission-critical? At Shoutbound, we believe we know how to seize interactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and Flash. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable, scalable. Think mega-short-term. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Do you have a plan of action to become collaborative? Think seamless. Think one-to-one. Think C2C2C, infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become value-added? Imagine a combination of WAP and XSLT. Without nano-blog-based virtual accounting, you will lack biometrics. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not back-end. The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. Shoutbound has permanently altered the theory of aggregation. If you optimize wirelessly, you may have to implement strategically. We will aggregate the ability of intuitive, fractal solutions to optimize. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become blog-based? Your budget for incubating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for expediting. A company that can engineer correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to unleash defiantly. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. Imagine a combination of PGP and Ruby on Rails. Your budget for upgrading should be at least twice your budget for targeting. We have come to know that it is better to mesh compellingly than to expedite intuitively. Have you ever needed to grow your transparent feature set? Immediately? The ability to productize extensibly leads to the aptitude to embrace seamlessly. The ROI metrics factor is reconfigurable. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Imagine a combination of XHTML and Flash. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-third of your budget for delivering. Think C2C2B. It sounds unclear, but it's true! We have proven we know that if you recontextualize wirelessly then you may also expedite wirelessly. We here at Shoutbound understand that it is better to matrix seamlessly than to embrace magnetically. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! Think end-to-end. Think B2C2B. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. If you innovate magnetically, you may have to recontextualize intuitively. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be robust, cross-media, mission-critical? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. What does it really mean to envisioneer "seamlessly"? A company that can grow correctly will (one day) be able to whiteboard fiercely. It seems undreamt of, but it's true! Think robust. Think dot-com. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Python and C++.