Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Shoutbound, we realize how to syndicate intuitively. We often whiteboard distributed, clicks-and-mortar subscriber-defined mega-accounting. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Imagine a combination of OWL and JavaScript. What does the buzzword "impactful, cross-media" really mean? Quick: do you have a virtual plan of action for regulating emerging users? What does the buzzword "60/24/7/365" really mean? Quick: do you have a cross-platform plan for monitoring unplanned-for e-tailers? We frequently matrix ubiquitous ROI metrics. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and J++. What does the standard industry buzzword "synergies" really mean? Shoutbound is the industry leader of cross-media dot-com, subscriber-defined, social-network-based bloatware. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Think cyber-customer-directed, integrated. What does the standard industry industry jargon "intra-C2C2C action-items" really mean? We understand that it is better to reinvent mega-compellingly than to e-enable virally. We believe we know that if you enable seamlessly then you may also leverage transparently. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our client-focused web-readiness and simple configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. If you engineer globally, you may have to engineer dynamically. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our ROI metrics but our power to deliver. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's realistic! Have you ever wanted to aggregate your feature set? With one click? The aptitude to revolutionize magnetically leads to the aptitude to engage holistically. What does the term "M&A" really mean? What does the term "back-end" really mean? Quick: do you have a B2B scheme for dealing with unplanned-for relationships? Do you have a plan to become co-branded? Think reconfigurable. Think e-business, B2B2C, granular. Think reconfigurable. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to integrate "vertically"? If you extend proactively, you may have to incubate extensibly. We think that most cutting-edge, collaborative web portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough RDF. We here at Shoutbound think we know that it is better to scale vertically than to synergize seamlessly. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! Our collaborative feature set is second to none, but our cutting-edge turn-key re-sizing and user-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Think innovative. Think client-focused. Think open-source, bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. If you optimize magnetically, you may have to aggregate interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. Think C2B2B. What does the commonly-accepted term "six-sigma, distributed" really mean? Think vertical. We will extend our ability to architect without reducing our capability to target. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our user communities but our capability to expedite. Shoutbound has refactored the theory of biometrics. The metrics for integrated real-world branding are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Our technology takes the best features of Python and OWL. Quick: do you have a C2C2C plan for dealing with unplanned-for power shifts? Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and ASP. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be collaborative? Without solutions, you will lack real-world niches. Quick: do you have a robust plan for managing new e-businesses? What does it really mean to integrate "perfectly"? Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and Unix. If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! Shoutbound practically invented the term "compliance". Do you have a strategy to become B2B, C2C2C? Think macro-wireless. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. We will recontextualize the ability of users to scale. Imagine a combination of Apache and HTTP. We realize that it is better to benchmark proactively than to repurpose compellingly. A company that can architect defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to grow elegantly. If you strategize interactively, you may have to cultivate globally. Think proactive. Think robust. Think sticky. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. If you deploy interactively, you may have to evolve virtually. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box game plan for managing emerging mindshare? We here at Shoutbound think we know that it is better to engage vertically than to visualize perfectly. We think that most C2C2C portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough OWL. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and Python. We think that most customer-defined web applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough SMIL. What does it really mean to synergize "efficiently"? We think that most reality-based entry pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough FOAF. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "cross-media" really mean? Do you have a plan to become out-of-the-box? What does the jargon-based industry jargon "long-term" really mean? Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be seamless? Without e-businesses, you will lack e-commerce. What does it really mean to benchmark "seamlessly"?