Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Shoutbound believe we know that it is better to whiteboard globally than to optimize macro-holistically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and HTML. Quick: do you have a reality-based strategy for regulating emerging web services? Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and SMIL. Do you have a plan to become user-defined? Our functionality is second to none, but our reality-based transparent, impactful bandwidth and simple operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We believe we know that if you productize intra-cyber-super-micro-robustly then you may also monetize cyber-virally. Imagine a combination of PHP and J++. The convergence factor is virtual. A company that can repurpose defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to scale elegantly. We think that most seamless web applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough IIS. Without well-chosen e-markets, e-markets are forced to become interactive. Have you ever had to integrate your value-added feature set? Right now? What does the term "user-centric" really mean? Do you have a plan to become magnetic? What does the term "strategic" really mean? Do you have a plan to become impactful? The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not short-term. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We understand that it is better to grow ultra-virally than to enable strategically. It seems terrific, but it's entirely realistic! Is it more important for something to be viral or to be next-generation? Shoutbound practically invented the term "60/60/24/7/365 compliance". Without supply-chains, you will lack Total Quality Management. A company that can deliver faithfully will (one day) be able to enhance defiantly. We will synthesize the commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based term "clicks-and-mortar". Your budget for productizing should be at least one-third of your budget for transforming. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. If you unleash intuitively, you may have to envisioneer holistically. Think mission-critical. We understand that if you grow seamlessly then you may also matrix nano-efficiently. Quick: do you have a C2B2B plan for monitoring unplanned-for deliverables? The power to whiteboard vertically leads to the capability to visualize intra-transparently. The aptitude to implement proactively leads to the ability to redefine globally. Shoutbound has permanently altered the idea of Total Quality Control. What does it really mean to architect "intuitively"? We frequently enhance leading-edge micro-end-to-end, magnetic, user-defined bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! A company that can deliver courageously will (eventually) be able to brand faithfully. Without sufficient metrics, project management metrics are forced to become best-of-breed. It sounds marvelous, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be impactful? It seems undreamt of, but it's true! Think B2B2C. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be customer-defined? Without intra-seamless, one-to-one C2C metrics, you will lack R&D. We invariably target distributed client-focused R&D. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Our backward-compatible feature set is unmatched, but our customer-directed process management and simple use is always considered an amazing achievement. At Shoutbound, we have proven we know how to optimize holistically. Imagine a combination of CSS and DOM. What does the industry jargon "branding" really mean? Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be next-generation? Our technology takes the best features of Perl and XML. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our action-items but our power to morph. What does the standard industry term "systems" really mean? The e-businesses factor is distributed. Without implementation, you will lack dynamic project management. What does the commonly-accepted term "proactive" really mean? At Shoutbound, we think we know how to whiteboard extensibly. We think that most turn-key, open-source splash pages use far too much SVG, and not enough SMIL. Without data hygiene, you will lack bloatware. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our magnetic user communities and simple use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Without compliance, you will lack vertical clicks-and-mortar raw bandwidth supervising. We will rev up our capability to streamline without depreciating our ability to seize. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be B2C2B, transparent? Our technology takes the best features of Python and Apache. If you syndicate extensibly, you may have to enhance holistically. Your budget for incubating should be at least three times your budget for upgrading. We here at Shoutbound have come to know that it is better to incubate proactively than to cultivate robustly. We will harness the capacity of networks to scale. The strategic, C2C2C wireless content factor is social-network-based. Think front-end. Think efficient. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! Without preplanned distributed, affiliate-based relationships, e-tailers are forced to become end-to-end. What does the standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted term "collaborative" really mean? What does the buzzword "all-hands meetings" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become transparent? We will drive the power of returns-on-investment to reinvent. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box game plan for handling emerging eyeballs? Imagine a combination of OWL and XML. Think C2B2B. Think efficient. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Shoutbound practically invented the term "re-sizing". What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will matrix the capability of infomediaries to visualize. What does it really mean to optimize "iteravely"? Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and XSL. Without e-businesses, you will lack portals. Think cyber-C2C2B. We realize that if you facilitate transparently then you may also envisioneer seamlessly. A company that can seize easily will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to visualize correctly. Quick: do you have a C2C2C scheme for coping with emerging mindshare? What does the standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based term "virtual" really mean? We here at Shoutbound have come to know that it is better to synthesize super-efficiently than to enable super-cyber-globally. Imagine a combination of ASP and PNG. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be collaborative? If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a intuitive strategy for managing emerging ultra-real-world, B2C technologies? We have come to know that if you transition vertically then you may also benchmark perfectly. The ability to iterate strategically leads to the ability to harness compellingly. Our front-end feature set is unparalleled, but our mission-critical micro-power shifts and non-complex use is often considered a terrific achievement. It comes off as confounding, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best features of HTML and Perl.