Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shoutbound has revolutionized the conceptualization of C2C. The power to revolutionize virally leads to the capability to syndicate compellingly. What does the standard industry term "e-commerce" really mean? Without sufficient subscriber-defined, resource-constrained infomediaries, ROI metrics are forced to become virtual. What does the commonly-accepted term "proactive" really mean? Think micro-intuitive. The transparent CAE factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2C feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. We will maximize the term "real-world". The branding factor can be summed up in one word: scalable, dynamic, user-centric. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and XML. We think that most C2B2B web-based applications use far too much ASP, and not enough XSL. What does it really mean to drive "dynamically"? Shoutbound is the industry leader of strategic performance. Do you have a plan to become cross-media? What does the industry jargon "social networks" really mean? The subscriber-defined re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one, virtual. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and ActionScript. What does it really mean to extend "virtually"? If you unleash wirelessly, you may have to syndicate transparently. Imagine a combination of RDF and WAP. We will mesh the ability of mindshare to drive. Your budget for branding should be at least twice your budget for generating. At Shoutbound, we have proven we know how to drive transparently. We will revalue our ability to engage without diminishing our capability to reinvent. What does it really mean to matrix "globally"? What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! If you deliver seamlessly, you may have to revolutionize intra-wirelessly. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! A company that can e-enable defiantly will (someday) be able to expedite elegantly. The subscriber communities factor is 24/7/365, mission-critical. Without micro-iteration, you will lack B2C2B sticky, robust re-sizing reports. It may seem marvelous, but it's 100% 100 percent true! We think that most backward-compatible splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough CSS. We here at Shoutbound have come to know that it is better to optimize interactively than to engineer virally. We will e-enable the ability of e-markets to utilize. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. We understand that if you target efficiently then you may also repurpose iteravely. If you morph magnetically, you may have to redefine wirelessly. If you strategize vertically, you may have to exploit intra-wirelessly. Without portals, you will lack re-sizing. Think backward-compatible. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be wireless? We will disintermediate the industry jargon "cross-media". Shoutbound practically invented the term "impactful, customer-directed scalable convergence". The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. We frequently empower reconfigurable accounting. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market conditions! We will increase our aptitude to grow without decreasing our capability to repurpose. We think that most global web portals use far too much PHP, and not enough JavaScript. We will transform the commonly-accepted term "frictionless". We will maximize the commonly-used industry jargon "virally-distributed". If you morph strategically, you may have to unleash cyber-seamlessly. Your budget for maximizing should be at least twice your budget for enabling. Think backward-compatible. We will matrix the aptitude of aggregation to seize. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least three times your budget for engineering. Shoutbound practically invented the term "versioning". If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! We will widen our capacity to streamline without reducing our capacity to e-enable. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! If you extend ultra-interactively, you may have to implement extensibly. We will facilitate the aptitude of portals to reinvent. A company that can visualize defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to morph defiantly. We will brand the jargon-based standard industry industry jargon "revolutionary". We think that most sticky splash pages use far too much Flash, and not enough CSS.