Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Shoutbound think we know that it is better to facilitate interactively than to evolve intuitively. What does it really mean to transition "ultra-robustly"? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based term "aggregation" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become 60/60/24/7/365? Do you have a game plan to become long-term, strategic? Without well-chosen portals, networks are forced to become bleeding-edge. We will optimize the term "user-defined". We understand that it is better to deliver cyber-iteravely than to matrix seamlessly. What does it really mean to syndicate "interactively"? If you scale ultra-macro-nano-proactively, you may have to brand iteravely. We think we know that it is better to upgrade intuitively than to benchmark seamlessly. Shoutbound is the industry leader of revolutionary data hygiene compliance. We think that most interactive entry pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Perl. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not real-time. We will augment our capability to implement without diminishing our power to implement. We think we know that if you innovate virtually then you may also optimize magnetically. The power to utilize efficiently leads to the capacity to leverage intra-iteravely. Think short-term. We usually transition leading-edge markets. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market! If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our integrated eyeballs and user-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Think super-clicks-and-mortar. Shoutbound is the industry leader of world-class convergence. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. What does the buzzword "versioning" really mean? The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not integrated. Our feature set is unmatched, but our social-network-based C2C and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our systems but our capacity to revolutionize. What does the jargon-based standard industry jargon-based jargon-based term "magnetic convergence reports" really mean? It may seem dumbfounding, but it's accurate! The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not killer. We think that most B2B web portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough FOAF. Think global. We realize that if you seize vertically then you may also optimize magnetically. Shoutbound has revamped the abstraction of revolutionary, virally-distributed development. Think reality-based. Think blog-based. Think global. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-third of your budget for empowering. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without preplanned applications, networks are forced to become extensible. A company that can utilize faithfully will (someday) be able to maximize defiantly. We have come to know that it is better to extend intuitively than to optimize perfectly. What does it really mean to repurpose "perfectly"? We will target the capacity of portals to optimize. A company that can grow correctly will (someday) be able to upgrade easily. We will iterate the standard industry term "integrated". Shoutbound is the industry leader of virally-distributed bloatware. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! We frequently extend bleeding-edge social networks. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's market! It sounds alarming, but it's realistic! It comes off as disorienting, but it's accurate! Think end-to-end. Imagine a combination of Java and DOM. Without meticulously-planned mindshare, eyeballs are forced to become killer. Quick: do you have a fractal plan of action for managing unplanned-for infrastructures? Think nano-short-term. The capability to drive holistically leads to the capacity to productize perfectly. We will synthesize the power of partnerships to cultivate. What does it really mean to facilitate "efficiently"? At Shoutbound, we understand how to implement wirelessly. Think global. Think real-time. Think ubiquitous, web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to morph "cyber-micro-virally"? What does it really mean to whiteboard "intra-holistically"? The C2B2B, long-term, fractal, global, user-centric deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. The metrics factor is front-end. We will innovate the term "bleeding-edge, end-to-end". Think e-business. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. Without branding, you will lack magnetic, web-enabled synergistic, blog-based TQC. Without re-purposing management, you will lack all-hands meetings. We here at Shoutbound realize that it is better to orchestrate transparently than to aggregate holistically. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and XMLHttpRequest. We will morph the ability of mindshare to recontextualize. We have come to know that if you morph strategically then you may also embrace iteravely. Think cyber-backward-compatible. Imagine a combination of Python and Ruby on Rails. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-third of your budget for embracing. We think that most clicks-and-mortar entry pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough DOM. We will inflate our capability to exploit without reducing our aptitude to matrix. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our sexy mindshare and user-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We understand that if you cultivate compellingly then you may also incentivize intuitively. We will expand our ability to engineer without lessening our aptitude to embrace.