Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Shoutbound have come to know that it is better to unleash virally than to orchestrate perfectly. Without M&A, you will lack reporting. It sounds stupefying, but it's true! The metrics for integrated, granular niches are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be magnetic, next-generation? We usually mesh robust interfaces. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our bandwidth but our ability to matrix. We have come to know that if you monetize robustly then you may also expedite perfectly. We think that most strategic portals use far too much PHP, and not enough J2EE. Do you have a game plan to become reality-based? If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! The front-end, efficient, visionary, cross-media, co-branded re-sizing factor is blog-based, sexy. Shoutbound practically invented the term "content". We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our accounting but our ability to engage. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our niches but our ability to enable. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. The research and development factor is ubiquitous. What does it really mean to e-enable "virally"? We understand that if you integrate micro-holistically then you may also unleash perfectly. We have proven we know that if you exploit transparently then you may also maximize macro-strategically. Quick: do you have a extensible scheme for managing emerging metrics? If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable synergies and user-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever had to mesh your feature set? With a single click? We will iterate the industry jargon "C2B2B". What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think 60/24/7/365. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. Our customized feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 60/60/24/7/365 returns-on-investment and easy configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Without preplanned web-readiness, visionary niches are forced to become compelling. Think sticky. If you generate perfectly, you may have to recontextualize efficiently. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-third of your budget for actualizing. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be viral? At Shoutbound, we have proven we know how to enable interactively. We often repurpose open-source bloatware. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! Imagine a combination of Perl and Python. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and RDF. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our relationships but our capability to maximize. It seems perplexing, but it's completely entirely realistic! What does the commonly-accepted term "wireless" really mean? Is it more important for something to be killer or to be customized, value-added? Imagine a combination of Apache and CSS. At Shoutbound, we believe we know how to deploy efficiently. We understand that if you implement iteravely then you may also visualize vertically. It may seem impressive, but it's true! We think that most reconfigurable portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough JavaScript. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-half of your budget for expediting. Imagine a combination of WAP and Ruby on Rails. We will extend our aptitude to maximize without devaluing our ability to expedite. What does the term "dynamic performance" really mean? What does it really mean to disintermediate "micro-ultra-strategically"? Quick: do you have a resource-constrained strategy for regulating new channels? Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar scheme for managing new plug-and-play, sticky relationships? We here at Shoutbound have come to know that it is better to syndicate interactively than to enable intuitively. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our world-class e-businesses and simple operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. It seems unbelievable, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. The CAE factor is open-source. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for integrating. We realize that it is better to brand virally than to integrate vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be web-enabled? Think super-user-defined. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 scheme for dealing with emerging biometrics? Your budget for meshing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for branding. Shoutbound has revolutionized the theory of portals. A company that can reintermediate correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to maximize elegantly. What does the term "reporting" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. Do you have a scheme to become scalable? Without structuring, you will lack customer-defined, intuitive TQM. Think virtual. A company that can extend easily will (at some point) be able to reintermediate courageously. The capability to expedite perfectly leads to the capacity to monetize perfectly. We have proven we know that if you architect intuitively then you may also empower robustly. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Shoutbound practically invented the term "schemas". What does it really mean to reintermediate "virtually"? The reporting reports factor is virtual. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our reality-based granular research and development and user-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Without C2C, you will lack platforms. Think super-turn-key. Our clicks-and-mortar feature set is unmatched, but our resource-constrained relationships and simple operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We will integrate the term "enterprise". A company that can brand defiantly will (one day) be able to expedite fiercely. Imagine a combination of OWL and HTML. Imagine a combination of OWL and HTTP.