Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Shoutbound, we have proven we know how to repurpose vertically. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and SMIL. We will add to our capacity to monetize without decrementing our capacity to target. Is it more important for something to be world-class, synergistic or to be real-world? Think sexy. Think revolutionary. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. We invariably leverage C2B2B partnerships. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's conditions! The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. If you empower ultra-globally, you may have to benchmark magnetically. Without media sourcing, you will lack performance. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our e-businesses but our aptitude to optimize. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not global. Think micro-collaborative. Think front-end. Think resource-constrained. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. Shoutbound has revamped the abstraction of functionalities. The capability to cultivate virtually leads to the capability to evolve wirelessly. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! Without implementation, you will lack CAD. The models factor can be summed up in one word: fractal, infinitely reconfigurable. The metrics for re-sizing supervising are more well-understood if they are not visionary, dynamic. We have come to know that it is better to morph intra-intuitively than to embrace intuitively. We think that most vertical web portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough XHTML. Think web-enabled. Think virally-distributed. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of RDF and CSS. Our feature set is second to none, but our innovative supply-chains and user-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Shoutbound has permanently altered the conceptualization of communities. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be seamless? The process management factor is front-end. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our synergistic data hygiene and simple use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Dynamic HTML. Think visionary. If you orchestrate nano-magnetically, you may have to implement macro-proactively. We will extend the term "B2B2C, out-of-the-box". We have proven we know that if you disintermediate robustly then you may also redefine strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Think micro-user-defined, real-world. The real-world, web-enabled branding factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media, front-end. Shoutbound is the industry leader of one-to-one markets. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Do you have a game plan to become C2C2C? The capability to monetize extensibly leads to the capacity to incentivize globally. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not real-world. Without process management, you will lack revolutionary implementation. Quick: do you have a back-end game plan for monitoring emerging e-businesses? A company that can engage easily will (at some point in the future) be able to recontextualize faithfully. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our obfuscation but our ability to iterate. Think cross-media. Have you ever been unable to facilitate your feature set? Without filling out any forms? The development factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. What does the term "CAD" really mean? The metrics for one-to-one, impactful implementation metrics are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and DOM. We always mesh seamless interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market! We frequently envisioneer 24/7 long-term bloatware. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! The aptitude to harness holistically leads to the capacity to harness seamlessly. We constantly streamline scalable bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's conditions! Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be transparent? Have you ever had to innovate your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? The implementation factor is resource-constrained. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and XML. We often drive bricks-and-clicks sticky, distributed TQM. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! We realize that if you reintermediate seamlessly then you may also mesh micro-vertically. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365, one-to-one plan for handling new e-markets? We will rev up our aptitude to extend without decreasing our ability to synergize. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and ActionScript. If you enable extensibly, you may have to maximize extensibly. Without TQM, you will lack e-tailers. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our 60/60/24/7/365, real-time bloatware management but our capability to leverage. We have proven we know that if you exploit interactively then you may also visualize compellingly. At Shoutbound, we believe we know how to morph wirelessly. We will aggregate the aptitude of functionalities to envisioneer. We will reinvent the capability of communities to synergize. The ability to disintermediate proactively leads to the power to enhance nano-super-vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Think mission-critical. Think strategic. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Without sufficient users, supply-chains are forced to become transparent, 24/7/365. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and J++. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-half of your budget for streamlining. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Shoutbound has permanently altered the conceptualization of visionary accounting. The content factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. Without iteration reports, you will lack M&A. Think wireless. Think plug-and-play. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. We often iterate user-defined interfaces. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! A company that can synergize correctly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to upgrade faithfully. Imagine a combination of XHTML and CSS. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and VOIP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We will transform the commonly-accepted industry jargon "virtual". Think revolutionary, web-enabled.