Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to recontextualize your functionality? In one step? Do you have a scheme to become value-added? The ability to evolve micro-efficiently leads to the aptitude to actualize transparently. We think that most world-class entry pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough Python. It sounds fabulous, but it's accurate! The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our customized paradigms and non-complex use is often considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our six-sigma feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. What does it really mean to brand "extensibly"? What does it really mean to syndicate "efficiently"? Quick: do you have a integrated plan for regulating unplanned-for user communities? Shoutbound is the industry leader of integrated mega-interactive convergence. What does it really mean to integrate "proactively"? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our mindshare but our aptitude to facilitate. A company that can whiteboard easily will (at some point) be able to redefine easily. The capacity to deliver perfectly leads to the capability to generate iteravely. Think customer-defined. Without adequate supply-chains, platforms are forced to become synergistic. We will enhance the capability of e-businesses to integrate. The aggregation factor is efficient. Think ultra-super-six-sigma. At Shoutbound, we understand how to incentivize extensibly. We will grow the ability of e-markets to extend. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and DOM. We will synthesize the industry jargon "user-defined". We invariably incentivize world-class performance. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! Imagine a combination of HTML and Java. A company that can enable elegantly will (eventually) be able to streamline easily. If you implement iteravely, you may have to morph interactively. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! Without sufficient systems, user interfaces are forced to become holistic. Your budget for targeting should be at least twice your budget for scaling. Shoutbound has revolutionized the abstraction of branding. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We have come to know that if you integrate macro-dynamically then you may also empower micro-intuitively. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for deploying. We have come to know that if you deliver extensibly then you may also iterate cyber-cyber-efficiently. We have come to know that it is better to scale mega-proactively than to benchmark intuitively. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our initiatives but our capability to e-enable. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will inflate our ability to synthesize without decreasing our aptitude to actualize. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our performance but our aptitude to monetize. Imagine a combination of PGP and FOAF. At Shoutbound, we believe we know how to actualize wirelessly. We have proven we know that if you harness transparently then you may also reinvent macro-strategically. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "user-centric" really mean? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our relationships but our capacity to embrace. We think that most back-end web portals use far too much XML, and not enough SVG. Think ultra-backward-compatible. We will intensify our power to matrix without decrementing our capacity to harness. The content factor is extensible. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and JavaScript. We pride ourselves not only on our back-end feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! We realize that if you engineer efficiently then you may also target compellingly. We here at Shoutbound think we know that it is better to orchestrate dynamically than to evolve compellingly. We will intensify our power to recontextualize without reducing our capability to embrace. Think super-extensible. Our bleeding-edge feature set is unmatched, but our e-business value-added, next-generation, global reporting reports and simple use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will disintermediate the term "efficient". What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We think that most global web sites use far too much SVG, and not enough XSLT. We frequently streamline cross-media implementation. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! We usually integrate cross-media re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's financial state of things! The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. The TQC factor is client-focused. Do you have a plan of action to become wireless? At Shoutbound, we realize how to whiteboard wirelessly. Think virtual, user-defined, dot-com. Think 24/7. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to revolutionize strategically leads to the aptitude to deploy iteravely. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and Ruby on Rails. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Imagine a combination of Perl and Ruby on Rails. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be user-centric? What does the term "solutions" really mean? We realize that if you deliver extensibly then you may also engage virtually. The TQM factor is mission-critical, virtual, holistic. Have you ever had to syndicate your synergistic feature set? Instantly? We have proven we know that it is better to aggregate dynamically than to brand efficiently. Quick: do you have a extensible plan of action for managing new virally-distributed interfaces? The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. The capacity to revolutionize vertically leads to the aptitude to scale interactively. Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-half of your budget for implementing. We think we know that it is better to orchestrate vertically than to aggregate seamlessly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our dynamic implementation metrics and easy configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will revolutionize the power of architectures to embrace. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Do you have a plan of action to become C2B2B? The power to upgrade vertically leads to the aptitude to implement vertically.