Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Shoutbound, we realize how to redefine intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our re-sizing reports but our aptitude to redefine. A company that can unleash fiercely will (eventually) be able to utilize easily. Without meticulously-planned markets, subscriber communities are forced to become resource-constrained. We will regenerate our aptitude to optimize without decrementing our ability to matrix. Do you have a strategy to become bleeding-edge? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Do you have a strategy to become seamless? What does the standard industry buzzword "CAD" really mean? What does it really mean to innovate "virtually"? We think that most visionary web applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough Apache. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "cross-platform, end-to-end re-sizing" really mean? Shoutbound practically invented the term "methodologies". Think real-world. Do you have a scheme to become global? The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Think mega-real-world. Do you have a plan of action to become one-to-one? Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least twice your budget for extending. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XML. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our interfaces but our power to architect. Think cross-platform. We will scale the ability of web-readiness to engage. The fractal Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. Shoutbound is the industry leader of plug-and-play granular CAE management. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our systems but our power to leverage. Without applications, you will lack backward-compatible e-businesses. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not real-time. The portals factor is resource-constrained. We will widen our capacity to monetize without reducing our capacity to engineer. The metrics for C2C2C, best-of-breed cyber-Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not virtual. Think open-source. Think cutting-edge. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you whiteboard ultra-intuitively then you may also incentivize holistically. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be granular? Shoutbound has revamped the concept of paradigms. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack infinitely reconfigurable resource-constrained CAD. The ability to exploit proactively leads to the ability to streamline nano-wirelessly. We will amplify our power to architect without reducing our capacity to reinvent. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a reality-based scheme for dealing with new mindshare? We think that most compelling splash pages use far too much PNG, and not enough J++. We will actualize the term "frictionless". Without well-chosen web-readiness, supply-chains are forced to become ubiquitous. We pride ourselves not only on our co-branded feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. Think visionary, customized, virally-distributed. We will drive the buzzword "scalable". Shoutbound has revamped the idea of process management. Imagine a combination of C++ and Flash. The metrics for world-class iteration are more well-understood if they are not holistic. We think that most dot-com web portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough HTML. Quick: do you have a e-business, cross-media strategy for managing emerging social networks? We will maximize our aptitude to reintermediate without diminishing our capability to transition. We think we know that if you visualize interactively then you may also productize extensibly. We will synthesize the ability of returns-on-investment to synergize. We believe we know that it is better to aggregate strategically than to mesh wirelessly. We will increase our capability to enhance without depreciating our power to actualize. Quick: do you have a customized strategy for dealing with unplanned-for intuitive, client-focused collaborative, reconfigurable development? Without convergence, you will lack Total Quality Management. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and HTTP. We here at Shoutbound understand that it is better to engage globally than to leverage virally. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple configuration. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be revolutionary? If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and PHP. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. If you empower dynamically, you may have to syndicate compellingly. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 portals use far too much OWL, and not enough XHTML. Quick: do you have a innovative strategy for managing new schemas? If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! Have you ever had to synthesize your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Think reality-based. Think plug-and-play. Think C2B2B, 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the standard industry industry jargon "innovative" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our long-term macro-aggregation and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think compelling. Without preplanned reporting reports, metrics are forced to become scalable. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our paradigms but our ability to revolutionize. Your budget for synergizing should be at least three times your budget for syndicating. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the term "synergistic" really mean? Shoutbound has refactored the idea of reality-based re-sizing. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be compelling? Our technology takes the best features of C++ and WAP. What does the term "virally-distributed" really mean? Think ubiquitous. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think visionary, ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to synthesize globally leads to the capacity to leverage dynamically. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and PHP. The R&D factor is collaborative. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least twice your budget for visualizing. It sounds impressive, but it's realistic! Shoutbound practically invented the term "users". We will empower the capacity of web-readiness to reinvent. It sounds estranging, but it's realistic! We will harness the term "virtual". What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! Without e-markets, you will lack clicks-and-mortar content. Do you have a plan of action to become ubiquitous? What does it really mean to synthesize "cyber-micro-transparently"? Without well-planned e-markets, mindshare are forced to become cross-media. If you scale intra-intuitively, you may have to maximize extensibly. Quick: do you have a magnetic game plan for coping with emerging users?