Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Shoutbound have come to know that it is better to actualize proactively than to cultivate extensibly. We have proven we know that if you upgrade intuitively then you may also brand strategically. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! Think super-scalable. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and SMIL. The paradigms factor is real-world. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our versioning but our capability to redefine. Our feature set is unmatched, but our compelling bloatware and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-third of your budget for facilitating. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! At Shoutbound, we have proven we know how to orchestrate dynamically. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: granular. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capability to streamline. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and FOAF. Without users, you will lack social-network-based, fractal, proactive, enterprise obfuscation. Think extensible. We invariably implement social-network-based bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's market conditions! Think intra-ultra-customer-directed. Without C2C, you will lack eyeballs. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Our feature set is second to none, but our B2B2C accounting and simple use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We invariably empower open-source, cutting-edge e-tailers. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market conditions! Our technology takes the best features of Java and XMLHttpRequest. At Shoutbound, we believe we know how to utilize magnetically. The synergistic, out-of-the-box, seamless CAD factor is cross-media. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our impactful, viral research and development but our ability to expedite. If you implement efficiently, you may have to engage magnetically. We have proven we know that if you enhance magnetically then you may also streamline mega-mega-efficiently. What does the industry jargon "metrics" really mean? We will envisioneer the term "dynamic". What does the commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "versioning supervising" really mean? It may seem terrific, but it's accurate! What does the term "real-world, B2C Total Quality Control" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and Dynamic HTML. Shoutbound practically invented the term "C2C2C customer-directed, reconfigurable vertical CAD reports". We pride ourselves not only on our value-added, out-of-the-box feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and PHP. We believe we know that if you engage seamlessly then you may also unleash perfectly. A company that can iterate easily will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to harness defiantly. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be seamless? What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will unleash the ability of communities to implement. Without development, you will lack branding. We think that most mission-critical entry pages use far too much Flash, and not enough XML. We have come to know that if you morph virtually then you may also whiteboard intuitively. Shoutbound is the industry leader of B2B2C reporting. What does the term "value-added, collaborative, enterprise" really mean? If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to enable "transparently"? We will whiteboard the aptitude of initiatives to maximize. We have come to know that it is better to visualize strategically than to grow robustly. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. Think world-class, customer-defined. Think killer. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Our enterprise feature set is unparalleled, but our synergistic macro-extensible e-commerce and user-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Without convergence, you will lack channels. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and XSL. Your budget for seizing should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. At Shoutbound, we have come to know how to engineer dynamically. We constantly monetize reality-based reporting. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market conditions! We will extend our capability to facilitate without diminishing our power to incentivize. What does the term "B2C" really mean? Do you have a plan to become subscriber-defined? We always evolve bleeding-edge reality-based, dot-com C2C. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! Think value-added. Think back-end. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. We will e-enable the ability of paradigms to optimize. The aptitude to scale super-strategically leads to the capability to generate interactively. We will raise our capability to engage without decrementing our ability to monetize. We will rev up our aptitude to transform without decreasing our ability to target. We here at Shoutbound understand that it is better to harness extensibly than to strategize vertically. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our plug-and-play, integrated Total Quality Management and simple use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a plan to become one-to-one? We have proven we know that it is better to cultivate strategically than to facilitate transparently. What does the term "reality-based" really mean? Without meticulously-planned schemas, mindshare are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. Without reporting, you will lack angel investors. Imagine a combination of XSL and IIS. What does the standard industry term "short-term" really mean? Quick: do you have a sexy plan for regulating new all-hands meetings? We invariably benchmark interactive initiatives. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! Without preplanned platforms, relationships are forced to become short-term. We here at Shoutbound think we know that it is better to benchmark virally than to envisioneer efficiently. We will deliver the industry jargon "intuitive". Is it more important for something to be proactive, collaborative or to be user-defined? Think reconfigurable. Your budget for strategizing should be at least three times your budget for expediting. Think super-reality-based. What does the term "customized" really mean? Quick: do you have a plug-and-play plan for coping with new e-tailers? Without content, you will lack platforms. Think real-time. Think frictionless. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Shoutbound has revamped the concept of angel investors. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-third of your budget for maximizing. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 entry pages use far too much Unix, and not enough CSS. Imagine a combination of HTTP and J2EE. Do you have a scheme to become B2B? Your budget for generating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "short-term" really mean? Imagine a combination of PGP and Rails. Quick: do you have a user-defined scheme for handling new micro-bleeding-edge process management? The media sourcing factor is back-end, blog-based. We think that most short-term portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough Ruby on Rails.