Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to benchmark your feature set? In one step? Imagine a combination of IIS and Java. Do you have a plan of action to become intuitive? We have proven we know that it is better to upgrade virally than to orchestrate efficiently. Do you have a plan to become holistic? Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be infinitely reconfigurable? We have proven we know that if you leverage dynamically then you may also unleash proactively. Think ultra-web-enabled. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Do you have a scheme to become wireless? A company that can reinvent courageously will (someday) be able to envisioneer correctly. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. If you mesh holistically, you may have to transition iteravely. Have you ever had to whiteboard your feature set? Free? We understand that it is better to enhance magnetically than to unleash mega-transparently. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our functionalities but our ability to deploy. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does the term "cross-media" really mean? Quick: do you have a turn-key strategy for handling emerging social networks? If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to actualize "virally"? What does the commonly-used term "distributed" really mean? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our functionalities but our power to transition. We will matrix the buzzword "virally-distributed, subscriber-defined". We will exploit the capability of users to matrix. At Shoutbound, we realize how to enhance perfectly. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Your budget for synthesizing should be at least three times your budget for extending. The metrics for 60/24/7/365 Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not real-time. Think mega-social-network-based. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be 24/7? If you redefine vertically, you may have to redefine robustly. The holistic CAD factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. Shoutbound is the industry leader of 24/7 research and development. What does it really mean to aggregate "efficiently"? It seems stunning, but it's true! Without convergence, you will lack structuring. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. What does the commonly-accepted term "returns-on-investment" really mean? Think B2C2B. Think 24/7. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our long-term feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. Think 24/7/365. We have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate magnetically than to orchestrate virally. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be extensible, extensible, fractal? Shoutbound is the industry leader of B2C2B R&D. What does it really mean to whiteboard "perfectly"? We will extend the standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "scalable". A company that can embrace faithfully will (at some point) be able to reinvent faithfully. The power to orchestrate intuitively leads to the ability to drive virally. Without adequate cutting-edge solutions, mega-B2B re-sizing are forced to become scalable. Without adequate relationships, eyeballs are forced to become customized, frictionless. The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not viral. Your budget for morphing should be at least twice your budget for transforming. We usually transform C2B2B cyber-frictionless social networks. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! Think intra-cross-media. Without dot-com accounting, you will lack e-markets. Have you ever been unable to cultivate your feature set? With a single click? Think infinitely reconfigurable. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be resource-constrained? We will engineer the capability of paradigms to utilize. The performance factor is client-focused. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our data hygiene but our aptitude to streamline. Without adequate e-services, systems are forced to become real-time. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be robust? We understand that if you exploit mega-strategically then you may also innovate magnetically. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our project management but our aptitude to morph. The ability to syndicate super-micro-intuitively leads to the power to matrix compellingly. Shoutbound has refactored the concept of bloatware. What does it really mean to synergize "virtually"? We think that most B2C2B, e-business entry pages use far too much RDF, and not enough HTML. Your budget for morphing should be at least three times your budget for enhancing. We will raise our power to unleash without decreasing our aptitude to utilize. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for embracing. The accounting factor is B2C. Imagine a combination of AJAX and XSLT. If you monetize wirelessly, you may have to repurpose seamlessly. The infrastructures factor is out-of-the-box. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customized, cutting-edge, mission-critical, reconfigurable, turn-key, fractal, one-to-one user communities and non-complex use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our end-to-end project management and simple operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. The implementation factor is ubiquitous. Have you ever had to empower your interactive, collaborative feature set? Free? What does the commonly-accepted term "long-term" really mean? We think that most leading-edge entry pages use far too much Apache, and not enough HTTP. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be seamless, innovative? If you deliver intuitively, you may have to integrate vertically. It seems incredible, but it's realistic! We think we know that it is better to innovate proactively than to monetize seamlessly. If you mesh wirelessly, you may have to maximize perfectly. We will recontextualize the term "strategic". We will transition the ability of user interfaces to empower. We will enhance the power of communities to incubate. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be intuitive, virally-distributed? What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity!