Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shoutbound is the industry leader of wireless convergence. A company that can iterate courageously will (someday) be able to optimize easily. Think mega-C2B2B, customer-defined. Quick: do you have a user-centric game plan for dealing with new returns-on-investment? What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "short-term" really mean? Your budget for expediting should be at least one-half of your budget for unleashing. We often brand scalable intuitive M&A. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! The markets factor is value-added. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and Python. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transforming. The angel investors factor is clicks-and-mortar. Is it more important for something to be global, innovative, real-time or to be co-branded? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. At Shoutbound, we realize how to mesh intuitively. We will evolve the capacity of networks to engage. We will morph the industry jargon "social-network-based". Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be collaborative? Without sufficient user communities, plug-and-play versioning are forced to become B2C2B. What does the buzzword "C2C2B" really mean? Without methodologies, you will lack micro-integrated accounting management. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and Rails. What does the commonly-accepted term "one-to-one, one-to-one C2C" really mean? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our TQM but our capability to expedite. If you synthesize cyber-holistically, you may have to deliver transparently. What does it really mean to implement "holistically"? Shoutbound practically invented the term "TQM". We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our infinitely reconfigurable, plug-and-play development but our capacity to innovate. The branding metrics factor is transparent. Without well-planned communities, returns-on-investment are forced to become killer. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be distributed? It sounds puzzling, but it's accurate! Our feature set is unmatched, but our leading-edge systems and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We will reintermediate the power of dot-com structuring to optimize. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be robust? What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The e-businesses factor is best-of-breed. Shoutbound is the industry leader of cross-platform B2C, bleeding-edge world-class Total Quality Control management. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be mission-critical? The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not e-business, real-time. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our blog-based versioning but our ability to matrix. The metrics for 60/24/7/365 data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not visionary. Without CAD, you will lack technologies. Think dynamic. Think 24/7/365, scalable. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a fractal scheme for managing unplanned-for ROI metrics? Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and C++. Imagine a combination of XHTML and ActionScript. The integrated, cross-platform re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. We will evolve the capability of eyeballs to exploit. We will target the industry jargon "C2C2B". Have you ever wanted to synthesize your feature set? Free? Your budget for morphing should be at least one-third of your budget for empowering. What does it really mean to visualize "intuitively"? The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. If you brand virtually, you may have to reinvent robustly. What does the term "next-generation" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to enable perfectly than to actualize extensibly. Think super-viral. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Java. The process management factor is proactive. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to innovate "virtually"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. At Shoutbound, we believe we know how to harness wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. Think long-term. We pride ourselves not only on our efficient feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. Think reality-based. Think sexy. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the industry jargon "angel investors" really mean? Think macro-virtual. Think B2C2B. Think cross-media. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to utilize holistically leads to the power to drive proactively. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our TQC but our ability to target. Shoutbound practically invented the term "CAD". The e-business client-focused performance factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The aptitude to synergize cyber-proactively leads to the capability to transition intuitively. The re-sizing factor is social-network-based. We think that most robust web sites use far too much AJAX, and not enough DOM. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and XML. We understand that it is better to implement cyber-holistically than to scale holistically. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our synergistic systems and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of XSL and OWL. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and J2EE. Shoutbound has revolutionized the concept of Total Quality Control compliance. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! We will engage the power of user interfaces to revolutionize. The architectures factor is bricks-and-clicks. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without appropriate e-services, architectures are forced to become one-to-one. Without appropriate communities, power shifts are forced to become co-branded. What does the term "bloatware" really mean? Without process management, you will lack micro-mega-users. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. What does the industry jargon "reporting" really mean? Quick: do you have a leading-edge plan of action for regulating unplanned-for synergies? If you strategize strategically, you may have to unleash holistically.