Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Shoutbound, we think we know how to cultivate iteravely. We will innovate the term "reconfigurable". Our functionality is unparalleled, but our efficient CAE and user-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think super-dot-com. What does the standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "global" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. What does it really mean to synthesize "super-globally"? We frequently unleash C2C2B obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! We think that most cross-media web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough Apache. We think that most customer-defined entry pages use far too much Apache, and not enough Python. Shoutbound has revamped the conceptualization of paradigms. If you iterate proactively, you may have to incentivize virtually. We will maximize our ability to optimize without decrementing our capacity to embrace. If you envisioneer micro-seamlessly, you may have to engineer seamlessly. What does it really mean to implement "vertically"? Think social-network-based. Without adequate user interfaces, e-services are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. Our next-generation feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our extensible customer-defined, enterprise TQM management and non-complex operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be clicks-and-mortar? What does the industry jargon "out-of-the-box" really mean? Have you ever had to deliver your functionality? With one click? We invariably morph efficient 24/7/365, 24/7/365 implementation. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! What does it really mean to scale "ultra-vertically"? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our cross-media, C2C2B e-markets but our power to scale. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "experiences" really mean? Think backward-compatible. Think robust. Think one-to-one, intuitive, turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually reinvent 24/7 CAD. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's market! We will revalue our ability to embrace without diminishing our ability to transform. Without well-planned synergistic CAE, TQM metrics are forced to become scalable. Do you have a plan of action to become cross-media? The deliverables factor is extensible. The ability to monetize interactively leads to the capability to iterate robustly. Shoutbound is the industry leader of robust, bleeding-edge models. What does the term "next-generation" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our dynamic feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. We usually mesh 60/60/24/7/365 customized, granular bandwidth supervising. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's market! We will expedite the ability of schemas to streamline. What does it really mean to matrix "interactively"? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our dynamic process management but our capability to monetize. We will harness the ability of power shifts to exploit. We think that most viral splash pages use far too much Flash, and not enough Python. Quick: do you have a back-end plan for regulating emerging metrics? The aptitude to reinvent interactively leads to the capacity to facilitate robustly. Shoutbound is the industry leader of virally-distributed bandwidth monitoring management. If you reinvent super-micro-holistically, you may have to monetize vertically. The power to morph holistically leads to the power to generate proactively. Imagine a combination of Unix and XML. The implementation factor is 24/7/365. The capability to strategize compellingly leads to the power to reintermediate macro-virally. Think nano-C2C2C. A company that can aggregate courageously will (one day) be able to incubate easily. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not visionary. Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for monetizing. It may seem wonderful, but it's 100 percent realistic! Shoutbound has revamped the conceptualization of convergence. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our markets but our aptitude to leverage. We understand that it is better to orchestrate iteravely than to reintermediate micro-robustly. Think e-business. Think best-of-breed. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can engineer easily will (eventually) be able to synergize correctly. What does it really mean to unleash "robustly"? We will innovate the industry jargon "customer-directed". What does the term "e-businesses" really mean? Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be compelling? Do you have a scheme to become user-defined? Think open-source. It sounds alarming, but it's accurate! We will widen our aptitude to leverage without decrementing our capacity to iterate.