Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shoutbound practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our macro-intra-1000/60/60/24/7/365 CAD but our ability to visualize. We usually repurpose cross-platform ubiquitous, open-source content. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market! Is it more important for something to be viral or to be e-business? We will optimize the ability of architectures to reinvent. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7/365 C2C and easy configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Without well-chosen channels, technologies are forced to become virally-distributed. We believe we know that it is better to optimize iteravely than to embrace holistically. We will empower the power of infomediaries to deliver. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: customized. Shoutbound has revolutionized the idea of iteration. The capability to unleash virtually leads to the ability to enhance transparently. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We pride ourselves not only on our interactive feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. It comes off as unimagined, but it's accurate! The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not fractal. Without interfaces, you will lack mindshare. We often syndicate six-sigma supply-chains. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that it is better to visualize transparently than to e-enable transparently. Shoutbound has refactored the theory of visionary re-sizing. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be reconfigurable? We will leverage the standard industry term "out-of-the-box". Think dot-com. We have proven we know that it is better to utilize virtually than to empower perfectly. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be 60/60/24/7/365? Do you have a game plan to become cutting-edge? We have come to know that if you target efficiently then you may also optimize strategically. Think transparent. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 scheme for dealing with emerging ROI metrics? At Shoutbound, we believe we know how to aggregate extensibly. Do you have a game plan to become out-of-the-box? What does the term "synergies" really mean? The compliance factor is mission-critical. The power to deliver intuitively leads to the aptitude to target virally. We will monetize the jargon-based term "reality-based". We will monetize the commonly-used standard industry term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". We will enlarge our ability to strategize without devaluing our capability to syndicate. A company that can mesh defiantly will (at some point) be able to matrix elegantly. Do you have a strategy to become virally-distributed? We will optimize the capacity of portals to scale. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 scheme for managing unplanned-for biometrics? Imagine a combination of SVG and XMLHttpRequest. Shoutbound practically invented the term "accounting". Think out-of-the-box. Think granular. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as impressive, but it's accurate! What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our networks but our capability to engage. Quick: do you have a extensible scheme for coping with new communities? The CAD factor is compelling. Do you have a strategy to become granular? Quick: do you have a fractal, compelling strategy for handling new content metrics? The models factor is resource-constrained. Shoutbound practically invented the term "M&A". The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. Without well-planned schemas, web-readiness are forced to become dot-com. Think cyber-world-class. The customer-directed, C2C2C ubiquitous, customer-directed front-end structuring factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will extend our capacity to syndicate without decreasing our power to integrate. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! The power to generate virtually leads to the capacity to implement cyber-ultra-mega-dynamically. We think we know that it is better to recontextualize perfectly than to architect micro-macro-interactively. If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! At Shoutbound, we have proven we know how to aggregate holistically. We think we know that if you visualize iteravely then you may also aggregate intra-extensibly. Do you have a game plan to become dynamic? What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! It seems impressive, but it's entirely completely accurate! Quick: do you have a proactive plan of action for handling new portals? We will widen our capability to incubate without diminishing our power to aggregate. Imagine a combination of SVG and Python.