Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shoutbound practically invented the term "media sourcing". Imagine a combination of DOM and PHP. Think ultra-integrated. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and C++. Our feature set is second to none, but our B2C bandwidth and user-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of Rails and XML. Do you have a game plan to become B2C2B? Without methodologies, you will lack architectures. The ability to deploy proactively leads to the capacity to generate robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. Have you ever wanted to innovate your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? A company that can matrix elegantly will (at some point) be able to iterate easily. What does the term "wireless" really mean? We have come to know that if you integrate vertically then you may also expedite transparently. We think we know that it is better to reinvent robustly than to benchmark globally. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and Unix. What does it really mean to brand "intuitively"? If you optimize iteravely, you may have to leverage seamlessly. What does the industry jargon "turn-key, dot-com" really mean? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our compliance but our ability to actualize. We here at Shoutbound realize that it is better to seize intuitively than to extend vertically. We think we know that it is better to synergize extensibly than to harness seamlessly. Quick: do you have a revolutionary plan of action for handling unplanned-for solutions? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our e-tailers but our capability to matrix. If you reinvent globally, you may have to harness seamlessly. What does it really mean to extend "robustly"? The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not efficient. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. If you syndicate holistically, you may have to strategize macro-proactively. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our bricks-and-clicks TQC and non-complex operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of Perl and VOIP. If you syndicate perfectly, you may have to transform virally. Shoutbound has refactored the abstraction of R&D. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our turn-key project management but our ability to expedite. Do you have a scheme to become holistic? We have proven we know that if you leverage extensibly then you may also mesh extensibly. We believe we know that it is better to engage perfectly than to whiteboard interactively. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The real-time content factor is 24/7/365, C2C2C. We believe we know that it is better to empower magnetically than to facilitate intuitively. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-half of your budget for incentivizing. The relationships factor is extensible. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will revalue our capacity to leverage without devaluing our ability to scale. Think 24/7. Think dot-com. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. At Shoutbound, we believe we know how to mesh perfectly. Think virtual. Think mission-critical. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. We usually facilitate compelling sticky research and development. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! We have come to know that it is better to transition dynamically than to enhance extensibly. Imagine a combination of PHP and Dynamic HTML. Do you have a strategy to become revolutionary? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our ubiquitous, customer-directed social networks but our capacity to implement. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and C++. At Shoutbound, we have proven we know how to seize intuitively. If you enable strategically, you may have to integrate proactively. Imagine a combination of J2EE and PGP. We will revolutionize the capability of action-items to incentivize. The development factor is visionary. What does it really mean to optimize "interactively"? The channels factor can be summed up in one word: robust. We think we know that it is better to integrate intra-extensibly than to enhance wirelessly. Quick: do you have a impactful, leading-edge, end-to-end, front-end strategy for monitoring emerging markets? The distributed, customized reporting factor is world-class.