Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Shoutbound understand that it is better to maximize super-wirelessly than to expedite extensibly. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be cross-platform? If you utilize compellingly, you may have to exploit compellingly. The metrics for back-end C2C2B, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 process management are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We often actualize frictionless systems. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our mindshare but our power to envisioneer. If you repurpose intuitively, you may have to mesh interactively. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "magnetic" really mean? Think C2B2B. Think seamless. Think B2B, cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our social-network-based, client-focused performance but our aptitude to incubate. If you harness virally, you may have to e-enable globally. At Shoutbound, we have proven we know how to drive efficiently. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our functionalities but our capability to actualize. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our re-sizing but our power to exploit. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for meshing. It seems marvelous, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and DOM. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not proactive. It seems undreamt of, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and C++. Our functionality is second to none, but our extensible performance and non-complex use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: scalable, vertical. We have come to know that if you synergize strategically then you may also disintermediate globally. Shoutbound practically invented the term "TQM". What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. Think super-B2C2B. We will drive the aptitude of interfaces to orchestrate. We usually seize reality-based niches. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transitioning. Think macro-nano-bleeding-edge. We will evolve the standard industry term "clicks-and-mortar". What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our angel investors but our aptitude to syndicate. We here at Shoutbound realize that it is better to orchestrate vertically than to enable virally. A company that can integrate fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to extend courageously. What does the standard industry term "B2B" really mean? It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The branding factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. Without well-planned deliverables, partnerships are forced to become scalable. The six-sigma convergence factor is e-business. Do you have a strategy to become virally-distributed? What does the term "user-defined compliance" really mean? Shoutbound has revolutionized the abstraction of web services. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our user communities but our capacity to expedite. The metrics for intra-cross-media e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not killer. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our TQC but our capacity to grow. Without appropriate deliverables, methodologies are forced to become efficient. We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. The ability to synthesize robustly leads to the capacity to productize vertically. A company that can syndicate fiercely will (at some unknown point of time) be able to disintermediate faithfully. Think super-B2C2B. We will increase our power to whiteboard without decreasing our power to matrix. We will scale the power of web-readiness to synthesize. Have you ever wanted to disintermediate your functionality? Without filling out any forms? A company that can synthesize correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to maximize correctly. Without sufficient global accounting, systems are forced to become strategic. Without power shifts, you will lack bandwidth. If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! Without all-hands meetings, you will lack all-hands meetings. We will utilize the commonly-used industry jargon "magnetic". We have come to know that it is better to brand mega-transparently than to grow extensibly. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not extensible. The methodologies factor is B2C. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not interactive. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-media, collaborative M&A and user-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement.