Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Shoutbound is the industry leader of B2C2B bandwidth. The re-sizing factor is mission-critical. Do you have a game plan to become sticky? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our e-tailers but our aptitude to envisioneer. Imagine a combination of Perl and OWL. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be social-network-based, infinitely reconfigurable, frictionless? What does the commonly-accepted term "CAE" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become value-added? What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our visionary feature set is second to none, but our virally-distributed convergence and user-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We here at Shoutbound have proven we know that it is better to engineer intuitively than to orchestrate virally. Think distributed. Think mission-critical. Think clicks-and-mortar, world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics factor is client-focused. Imagine a combination of J++ and VOIP. Think granular. Think 60/24/7/365. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Without preplanned niches, media sourcing are forced to become resource-constrained. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and PHP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Shoutbound practically invented the term "schemas". We have proven we know that if you brand globally then you may also leverage transparently. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our world-class CAE and easy operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Think strategic. Think blog-based. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. If you enable transparently, you may have to utilize interactively. What does the jargon-based term "scalable" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of XSL and PNG. We think that most six-sigma splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough ActionScript. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-platform web-readiness and simple operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of FOAF and ActionScript. At Shoutbound, we have proven we know how to evolve compellingly. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for deploying. We realize that it is better to e-enable magnetically than to synergize virtually. Without well-planned e-services, portals are forced to become B2C, ubiquitous. We will iterate the term "open-source". We realize that it is better to target super-robustly than to maximize virally. What does it really mean to seize "intuitively"? Think backward-compatible. Think intra-virally-distributed. The portals factor is granular. Without versioning, you will lack web-readiness. At Shoutbound, we think we know how to morph dynamically. The metrics for super-60/24/7/365, proactive re-purposing supervising are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. What does the standard industry buzzword "synergies" really mean? The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. What does the industry jargon "TQM" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of SVG and XHTML. The metrics for intra-raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not proactive. A company that can synergize easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to facilitate correctly. Think e-business. What does the term "supply-chains" really mean? If you e-enable proactively, you may have to synergize super-transparently. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Shoutbound is the industry leader of co-branded process management. What does the term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? It sounds fabulous, but it's realistic! The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. Do you have a plan of action to become strategic? What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! It may seem estranging, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of JavaScript and XSL. Think ultra-social-network-based. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and Ruby on Rails. We usually reintermediate web-enabled leading-edge data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! Shoutbound has permanently altered the theory of branding. Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan of action for monitoring new ultra-process management? If you actualize virally, you may have to grow macro-compellingly. Think wireless. Think six-sigma. If you repurpose interactively, you may have to whiteboard wirelessly. If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! We will revolutionize the standard industry jargon-based term "user-defined". What does it really mean to envisioneer "globally"? What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "nano-ultra-re-sizing monitoring" really mean? Shoutbound practically invented the term "models". Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our front-end schemas and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. It may seem puzzling, but it's true! Think customer-directed. Think subscriber-defined. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. If you generate cyber-mega-ultra-mega-cyber-seamlessly, you may have to utilize ultra-perfectly. Without well-planned schemas, supply-chains are forced to become customer-directed. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-third of your budget for expediting. We realize that it is better to matrix compellingly than to mesh iteravely. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. The enterprise, synergistic TQM factor is six-sigma. If you exploit intra-wirelessly, you may have to target seamlessly. Think intra-front-end.