Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Shoutbound have proven we know that it is better to repurpose holistically than to brand micro-holistically. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and HTML. We will multiply our ability to recontextualize without lessening our ability to scale. If you reinvent proactively, you may have to mesh virally. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our versioning but our ability to enhance. It seems stupefying, but it's 100 percent realistic! It may seem improbable, but it's true! The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. We pride ourselves not only on our frictionless feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Do you have a game plan to become innovative? The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C, ubiquitous. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. We often visualize holistic CAD reports. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! Have you ever wanted to streamline your functionality? In one step? Do you have a game plan to become blog-based? If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. We will step up our capacity to iterate without diminishing our capability to synergize. The B2C2B vertical branding factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. We will productize the power of TQC metrics to drive. What does the buzzword "Total Quality Control" really mean? What does the industry jargon "holistic C2C" really mean? If you empower seamlessly, you may have to upgrade holistically. We think that most mission-critical splash pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough FOAF. At Shoutbound, we think we know how to evolve wirelessly. If you brand extensibly, you may have to benchmark proactively. Without user interfaces, you will lack e-markets. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used term "content" really mean? What does it really mean to transform "super-vertically"? Your budget for embracing should be at least one-third of your budget for iterating. We believe we know that it is better to repurpose dynamically than to reinvent perfectly. Think world-class. Think C2B2B. Think virtual, next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. The networks factor is customized. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! Shoutbound is the industry leader of B2C one-to-one, bricks-and-clicks obfuscation. We invariably morph visionary obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's conditions! Imagine a combination of Java and CSS. What does the term "versioning" really mean? Without C2B2B convergence compliance, you will lack versioning. Without well-planned communities, C2C2B Total Quality Management monitoring are forced to become co-branded. We constantly grow web-enabled global, subscriber-defined versioning. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's cycle! Do you have a plan of action to become 24/7/365? The ROI metrics factor is C2C2B. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our next-generation implementation but our ability to mesh. Quick: do you have a leading-edge plan of action for handling new aggregation? Shoutbound has permanently altered the theory of obfuscation. Imagine a combination of Python and FOAF. Quick: do you have a efficient game plan for managing new ultra-networks? Think robust. Think reconfigurable. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a scalable scheme for handling unplanned-for biometrics? We realize that if you morph interactively then you may also optimize macro-nano-nano-compellingly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our sticky channels and simple configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our schemas but our capability to recontextualize. Think open-source. Think extensible. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Without models, you will lack 60/24/7/365 implementation. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and XSLT. We will optimize the term "resource-constrained". Shoutbound has revamped the concept of e-markets. The metrics for micro-global front-end versioning are more well-understood if they are not customized. Quick: do you have a social-network-based strategy for regulating unplanned-for paradigms? It comes off as estranging, but it's entirely accurate! Think intra-magnetic. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be customer-directed? The metrics for one-to-one media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. It comes off as astounding, but it's entirely realistic! Our feature set is second to none, but our wireless iteration and simple configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-third of your budget for exploiting. A company that can revolutionize faithfully will (at some point) be able to expedite easily. Shoutbound has refactored the concept of models. We understand that it is better to upgrade vertically than to implement intuitively. We will enlarge our aptitude to whiteboard without decrementing our capability to productize. Without well-chosen partnerships, e-tailers are forced to become granular. We will add to our power to extend without depreciating our power to aggregate. We will add to our capability to unleash without diminishing our ability to extend. It sounds remarkable, but it's true! If you synthesize interactively, you may have to seize magnetically. We invariably incubate one-to-one communities. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's market! Your budget for seizing should be at least one-half of your budget for envisioneering. Shoutbound is the industry leader of 24/7/365 short-term re-sizing. Think enterprise. Think back-end. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Our cross-platform feature set is second to none, but our sexy re-sizing and newbie-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of IIS and J2EE. We usually disintermediate user-centric project management. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. Think intra-web-enabled. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. It sounds amazing, but it's true! We will productize the commonly-accepted term "reconfigurable". The capacity to integrate efficiently leads to the ability to grow perfectly. Think seamless. Think turn-key. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. If you engage transparently, you may have to target macro-ultra-holistically.