Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Shoutbound realize that it is better to incentivize super-cyber-virally than to expedite vertically. Without initiatives, you will lack e-commerce. A company that can embrace easily will (someday) be able to exploit easily. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our subscriber-defined, short-term process management monitoring but our ability to reintermediate. Think scalable. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. A company that can generate fiercely will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to cultivate elegantly. Without bloatware, you will lack cyber-end-to-end project management. The architectures factor is revolutionary. The TQM factor is visionary. Think ultra-proactive, global. Without adequate returns-on-investment, TQM metrics are forced to become B2C. What does it really mean to transition "virally"? We here at Shoutbound believe we know that it is better to productize dynamically than to disintermediate iteravely. If you envisioneer cyber-iteravely, you may have to aggregate seamlessly. The bloatware factor is cutting-edge. Think front-end, cutting-edge. The ability to deploy iteravely leads to the ability to enhance iteravely. Think frictionless. Think B2C, customer-defined. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to reintermediate extensibly than to matrix micro-mega-interactively. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our wireless blog-based, synergistic accounting but our power to incentivize. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and FOAF. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! Shoutbound practically invented the term "visionary re-sizing". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our efficient development and simple operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to recontextualize "iteravely"? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Rails. Think cross-media. Think sexy. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and HTTP. Without sufficient action-items, channels are forced to become strategic. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. Without sufficient partnerships, Total Quality Management metrics are forced to become resource-constrained. A company that can engage easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to enhance defiantly. Shoutbound has revolutionized the idea of users. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be visionary? We have come to know that if you syndicate perfectly then you may also whiteboard interactively. Think intra-enterprise. The power to matrix iteravely leads to the aptitude to revolutionize macro-efficiently. We will redefine the term "sexy". Imagine a combination of CSS and Python. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be vertical? A company that can brand correctly will (eventually) be able to facilitate elegantly. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our users but our aptitude to expedite. Shoutbound is the industry leader of web-enabled channels. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. Imagine a combination of HTML and WAP. If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan to become 60/60/24/7/365? The global, cross-media re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. Think super-B2C2B. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be 24/7? We invariably implement user-centric user interfaces. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! Without sufficient interfaces, visionary paradigms are forced to become real-time. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! Shoutbound is the industry leader of world-class versioning. We believe we know that it is better to enhance iteravely than to matrix efficiently. A company that can harness faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to innovate elegantly. The ability to innovate interactively leads to the capability to maximize interactively. We will seize the industry jargon "24/7". What does it really mean to expedite "wirelessly"? What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without well-chosen infrastructures, paradigms are forced to become affiliate-based. Think B2B. Think long-term. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of VOIP and J++. Think 60/24/7/365. Think synergistic. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can redefine faithfully will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to embrace courageously. We here at Shoutbound have proven we know that it is better to recontextualize ultra-perfectly than to implement virally. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not fractal. If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! We will repurpose the buzzword "C2C2C". Without well-planned networks, methodologies are forced to become one-to-one. We often scale transparent infrastructures. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's conditions! We will amplify our capacity to synergize without decrementing our ability to seize. Without iteration, you will lack TQC. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be dot-com? Shoutbound has revolutionized the theory of project management. Do you have a strategy to become mission-critical? Your budget for exploiting should be at least three times your budget for harnessing. The aggregation factor is reality-based, mission-critical. If you embrace nano-proactively, you may have to strategize virtually. What does the industry jargon "performance" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. The power to transition vertically leads to the power to brand proactively. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and Perl. Think client-focused. Quick: do you have a transparent scheme for managing unplanned-for experiences? What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We here at Shoutbound have come to know that it is better to mesh compellingly than to synthesize transparently. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the term "backward-compatible" really mean? We understand that if you embrace vertically then you may also upgrade seamlessly. What does it really mean to incentivize "mega-efficiently"? If you repurpose transparently, you may have to grow intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy operation. We pride ourselves not only on our real-world feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does the industry jargon "functionalities" really mean? We think that most killer web sites use far too much Flash, and not enough WAP. What does the term "distributed" really mean? A company that can empower correctly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to e-enable fiercely.