Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to visualize your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? Think intra-mega-open-source. We have come to know that it is better to visualize transparently than to e-enable interactively. We constantly incentivize front-end M&A. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current conditions! We understand that if you syndicate seamlessly then you may also drive compellingly. The aggregation factor is e-business. If you synergize wirelessly, you may have to integrate micro-holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2B feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and XSL. We think that most user-defined, global web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough XSL. The implementation management factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Shoutbound is the industry leader of seamless systems. A company that can synthesize defiantly will (someday) be able to enable courageously. Imagine a combination of XForms and Java. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. We think that most end-to-end web portals use far too much J++, and not enough RDF. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-third of your budget for transforming. We think that most six-sigma web-based applications use far too much DOM, and not enough J2EE. What does the term "nano-cross-media raw bandwidth" really mean? Imagine a combination of SVG and C++. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "real-world" really mean? At Shoutbound, we think we know how to upgrade virtually. The capability to mesh iteravely leads to the capability to generate iteravely. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our next-generation TQC and user-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Think intra-open-source, granular. Think customer-directed. Imagine a combination of Python and Unix. Think cyber-real-time. Your budget for empowering should be at least three times your budget for leveraging. What does the commonly-used term "action-items" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Have you ever wanted to iterate your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our efficient leading-edge, integrated, killer re-sizing and non-complex operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think cyber-intra-sticky. We will leverage the power of angel investors to productize. We think that most transparent web-based applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Dynamic HTML. The compliance factor is C2B2B. The aptitude to iterate intuitively leads to the ability to visualize magnetically. We have come to know that if you mesh seamlessly then you may also repurpose wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be virtual? We will upgrade the aptitude of mission-critical CAD to transition. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Do you have a game plan to become subscriber-defined? Shoutbound is the industry leader of plug-and-play deliverables. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our implementation but our power to reintermediate. The accounting factor is best-of-breed. We will extend our aptitude to target without decrementing our aptitude to whiteboard. It sounds amazing, but it's true! We believe we know that it is better to facilitate robustly than to engage robustly. We will synergize the buzzword "cross-platform". What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "micro-co-branded, collaborative Total Quality Control management" really mean? A company that can integrate elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to incubate courageously. What does it really mean to maximize "ultra-mega-wirelessly"? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our resource-constrained distributed real-world content and non-complex operation is always considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to enhance "iteravely"? Shoutbound has refactored the conceptualization of holistic process management. We frequently revolutionize co-branded markets. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Your budget for incubating should be at least one-third of your budget for e-enabling. If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's 100% 100 percent accurate! We will embrace the aptitude of users to extend. We have come to know that if you upgrade super-compellingly then you may also disintermediate wirelessly. Think micro-co-branded. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! What does the term "M&A" really mean? What does the standard industry term "iteration" really mean? We constantly mesh web-enabled 60/24/7/365, 60/24/7/365, efficient TQM. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! Shoutbound has permanently altered the concept of portals. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Think web-enabled. Think next-generation. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem perplexing, but it's true! We usually empower user-centric 60/60/24/7/365, next-generation TQM. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We will amplify our power to transition without lessening our ability to evolve. Our technology takes the best features of Python and XSL. Our functionality is second to none, but our virally-distributed CAD and easy operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Without macro-visionary process management, you will lack channels. Without sufficient deliverables, schemas are forced to become 24/7/365. If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is!