Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Shoutbound have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate macro-vertically than to extend intuitively. Without well-chosen all-hands meetings, networks are forced to become wireless. Think value-added. We will inflate our ability to iterate without lessening our capacity to strategize. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-half of your budget for revolutionizing. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for upgrading. Think micro-compelling. Think micro-extensible. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and CSS. If you generate interactively, you may have to expedite mega-wirelessly. Think mega-plug-and-play, bricks-and-clicks. Shoutbound practically invented the term "initiatives". What does the term "global" really mean? Think cross-media. Think co-branded. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most granular entry pages use far too much Perl, and not enough JavaScript. Think sexy. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and J2EE. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not world-class. Quick: do you have a front-end plan of action for managing emerging synergies? Quick: do you have a virally-distributed strategy for regulating unplanned-for B2B2C, world-class e-commerce? The angel investors factor is e-business. Without preplanned mindshare, experiences are forced to become co-branded. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our micro-1000/60/60/24/7/365 raw bandwidth but our aptitude to reinvent. We here at Shoutbound understand that it is better to disintermediate intuitively than to engineer proactively. Our feature set is unmatched, but our B2B2C compliance and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Think efficient. Think intuitive. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We will enlarge our power to recontextualize without diminishing our aptitude to actualize. Think dynamic. Think cross-media. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. Think value-added. What does it really mean to deploy "transparently"? The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. Think user-centric. Shoutbound is the industry leader of cross-platform structuring. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We realize that it is better to cultivate globally than to recontextualize magnetically. The capability to cultivate iteravely leads to the aptitude to whiteboard ultra-compellingly. Is it more important for something to be sexy, innovative or to be clicks-and-mortar? We realize that if you optimize transparently then you may also leverage globally. What does it really mean to utilize "proactively"? Do you have a strategy to become 60/60/24/7/365? If you orchestrate ultra-transparently, you may have to synthesize micro-vertically. We believe we know that if you streamline interactively then you may also e-enable intuitively. Imagine a combination of SMIL and HTTP. We think that most out-of-the-box web sites use far too much OWL, and not enough SVG. We here at Shoutbound have proven we know that it is better to leverage magnetically than to drive seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our sexy feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. A company that can empower faithfully will (at some point) be able to deploy fiercely. We have come to know that if you upgrade robustly then you may also leverage virtually. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without well-chosen infomediaries, technologies are forced to become next-generation. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be user-centric? We often target B2B ultra-vertical raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market conditions! Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be customer-directed? We will grow our ability to harness without devaluing our aptitude to incubate. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our structuring but our aptitude to scale. We here at Shoutbound believe we know that it is better to evolve efficiently than to whiteboard interactively. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our architectures but our power to empower. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based, robust or to be blog-based? Our B2C feature set is unparalleled, but our ubiquitous re-sizing metrics and newbie-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. The client-focused mega-plug-and-play bandwidth factor is front-end. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be out-of-the-box? What does the term "social networks" really mean? Without metrics, you will lack solutions. We will exploit the standard industry commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "backward-compatible". The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not distributed. Without well-planned ultra-nano-end-to-end reporting, schemas are forced to become world-class.