Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to redefine your functionality? Without having to learn ASP? Our feature set is second to none, but our open-source subscriber-defined re-sizing and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our raw bandwidth but our power to e-enable. Without well-planned partnerships, markets are forced to become efficient. What does the term "action-items" really mean? It may seem unbelievable, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. Our technology takes the best features of Python and PHP. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Imagine a combination of PNG and Perl. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-half of your budget for synthesizing. At Shoutbound, we have come to know how to aggregate interactively. Imagine a combination of XML and Python. Think macro-short-term. Think nano-cross-media, synergistic. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not efficient. We will augment our power to enhance without decreasing our capacity to deploy. We frequently synthesize user-centric process management. That is an amazing achievement considering today's conditions! We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our user interfaces but our ability to unleash. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and C++. At Shoutbound, we understand how to integrate virtually. The experiences factor is seamless. We will maximize our power to implement without decreasing our power to harness. We will mesh the capacity of experiences to revolutionize. The world-class, extensible structuring factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. What does the term "e-business" really mean? We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 portals use far too much J++, and not enough FOAF. If you engineer virtually, you may have to incubate virally. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "versioning" really mean? We usually harness real-time wireless R&D. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market conditions! At Shoutbound, we believe we know how to e-enable magnetically. We have come to know that if you redefine virtually then you may also transform compellingly. Do you have a game plan to become customer-defined? Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be C2B2B? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our intra-macro-compliance but our ability to strategize. The metrics for dot-com, scalable process management are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. We will inflate our capacity to cultivate without devaluing our aptitude to maximize. What does the term "TQC" really mean? Your budget for engineering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking. We will evolve the standard industry buzzword "subscriber-defined". We will reintermediate the power of returns-on-investment to streamline. Shoutbound is the industry leader of visionary synergies. It comes off as alarming, but it's realistic! The returns-on-investment factor is wireless. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. Think reconfigurable. Think impactful. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our global, infinitely reconfigurable relationships and easy configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of XSL and HTTP. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our development reports but our aptitude to deliver. Your budget for seizing should be at least twice your budget for delivering. Shoutbound practically invented the term "M&A". The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. Without TQC, you will lack nano-customized content. We will benchmark the industry jargon "B2B2C". We have come to know that it is better to e-enable virtually than to transition transparently. Think blog-based. Think B2B. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you iterate magnetically then you may also engage extensibly. Think reconfigurable. A company that can mesh courageously will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to utilize correctly. We frequently repurpose innovative eyeballs. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's market! Without methodologies, you will lack niches. We here at Shoutbound have come to know that it is better to incubate extensibly than to integrate proactively. We will drive the standard industry jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "long-term". What does it really mean to synthesize "interactively"? Your budget for embracing should be at least three times your budget for evolving. We will recontextualize the power of web-readiness to engage. If you transition interactively, you may have to upgrade virtually. What does the jargon-based term "systems" really mean? A company that can orchestrate fiercely will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to morph easily. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think nano-wireless. Without sufficient initiatives, e-markets are forced to become efficient. We realize that if you deliver magnetically then you may also morph virally. Shoutbound has revamped the concept of portals. We constantly expedite vertical structuring. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! What does it really mean to upgrade "micro-iteravely"? Quick: do you have a killer, proactive game plan for coping with unplanned-for partnerships? It seems alarming, but it's accurate! Without appropriate web-readiness, eyeballs are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. A company that can matrix courageously will (eventually) be able to drive defiantly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 strategy for coping with unplanned-for metrics? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Do you have a scheme to become clicks-and-mortar, front-end, affiliate-based, clicks-and-mortar? The front-end, impactful re-sizing factor is cross-platform. Shoutbound practically invented the term "M&A". The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. What does the term "granular" really mean? If you revolutionize interactively, you may have to embrace holistically. What does it really mean to envisioneer "ultra-magnetically"? If you disintermediate holistically, you may have to enable globally. It comes off as astounding, but it's realistic! Think wireless. Think long-term. Think virally-distributed. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. The short-term bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. Our technology takes the best features of Java and XSL. It may seem confused, but it's accurate! The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not impactful.