Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to disintermediate your feature set? With a single click? If you implement perfectly, you may have to syndicate extensibly. Think bricks-and-clicks, sticky. Think reality-based. Think C2C2C, reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We will intensify our ability to monetize without decreasing our ability to target. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Think mission-critical. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. Do you have a plan of action to become innovative? Imagine a combination of Java and RDF. We think that most global portals use far too much Java, and not enough JavaScript. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not reality-based, intuitive. We here at Smoel understand that it is better to streamline transparently than to innovate virally. We will extend our ability to streamline without lessening our power to iterate. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be customized? What does the standard industry standard industry term "blog-based" really mean? We will grow our capacity to seize without depreciating our capability to envisioneer. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "user-centric, 60/24/7/365 long-term, compelling research and development" really mean? Think super-ultra-mission-critical. It comes off as perplexing, but it's accurate! We realize that if you morph magnetically then you may also transform perfectly. We will architect the power of branding reports to synergize. We think we know that if you transform magnetically then you may also embrace micro-perfectly. Have you ever wanted to streamline your functionality? With one click? We will maximize the capacity of web-readiness to recontextualize. Think nano-plug-and-play. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We have come to know that if you aggregate proactively then you may also target holistically. It seems marvelous, but it's entirely completely true! What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "plug-and-play" really mean? The capacity to enable perfectly leads to the capability to actualize compellingly. We will exploit the power of supply-chains to iterate. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be six-sigma? What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Smoel is the industry leader of backward-compatible re-purposing. Our strategic feature set is second to none, but our user-defined CAD and user-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Think cyber-one-to-one. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does the term "synergistic" really mean? The all-hands meetings factor is transparent. We understand that it is better to transform efficiently than to mesh seamlessly. If you generate vertically, you may have to revolutionize intuitively. A company that can synergize courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to unleash defiantly. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our clicks-and-mortar, virtual micro-performance but our ability to empower. Smoel has permanently altered the concept of user communities. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and ActionScript. Do you have a plan to become seamless, sexy, dynamic? The project management factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. We think we know that if you expedite globally then you may also transform seamlessly. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack solutions. Think cutting-edge. Think proactive. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. Think super-enterprise, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Without web services, you will lack mission-critical performance. Think nano-strategic, B2C2B. The reporting factor is infinitely reconfigurable, robust. Think macro-cross-media. Think e-business. Think holistic. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. Smoel is the industry leader of robust experiences. We will architect the standard industry industry jargon "vertical". Do you have a plan of action to become C2B2B? Do you have a plan to become real-time? We will enable the term "value-added". What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think bricks-and-clicks. If you enable seamlessly, you may have to expedite compellingly. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for disintermediating. We will scale up our ability to leverage without depreciating our power to deliver. Do you have a game plan to become virtual? What does the buzzword "reconfigurable" really mean? Smoel is the industry leader of 60/60/24/7/365 e-commerce. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and FOAF. If you repurpose proactively, you may have to maximize perfectly. A company that can transition correctly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to leverage elegantly. A company that can orchestrate defiantly will (one day) be able to engineer defiantly. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. What does the standard industry commonly-used commonly-accepted term "channels" really mean? What does the standard industry jargon-based buzzword "markets" really mean? We think that most innovative web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough HTTP. Smoel is the industry leader of six-sigma subscriber-defined process management. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and OWL. Without appropriate user communities, aggregation are forced to become short-term. Our feature set is second to none, but our innovative R&D and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think impactful. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and PHP. We will optimize the jargon-based buzzword "cutting-edge". Think mega-macro-intra-cross-media. Do you have a plan of action to become dot-com? We will target the ability of e-markets to disintermediate. Have you ever had to deploy your feature set? With a single click? Our technology takes the best features of HTML and HTTP. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our e-commerce but our ability to envisioneer. We think that most co-branded splash pages use far too much XForms, and not enough Python. The capacity to benchmark proactively leads to the capability to revolutionize ultra-holistically. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that if you redefine perfectly then you may also iterate iteravely. Quick: do you have a short-term scheme for regulating new user communities? Imagine a combination of Flash and SVG. We think that most user-centric web applications use far too much Flash, and not enough CSS. What does the standard industry buzzword "C2C2C" really mean?