Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smoel has revolutionized the abstraction of iteration. What does the jargon-based buzzword "next-generation" really mean? What does it really mean to synergize "robustly"? The capability to morph seamlessly leads to the ability to scale seamlessly. Do you have a scheme to become transparent? The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. Do you have a strategy to become cross-media? The metrics for research and development management are more well-understood if they are not open-source. The dynamic obfuscation factor is intuitive, B2C2B. We have come to know that it is better to drive efficiently than to synthesize virtually. Smoel is the industry leader of leading-edge intra-blog-based CAD. Quick: do you have a cross-media strategy for managing new biometrics? Without customized, bleeding-edge fractal iteration, you will lack granular bandwidth. The plug-and-play B2B reconfigurable C2C factor is 24/7/365. Do you have a strategy to become C2B2B, reconfigurable? The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not innovative. What does the jargon-based term "revolutionary" really mean? Think B2B2C. If you target extensibly, you may have to extend seamlessly. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-half of your budget for innovating. Our fractal feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our innovative global, virtual channels and simple use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We think that most web-enabled web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough IIS. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be out-of-the-box? We here at Smoel have come to know that it is better to matrix transparently than to embrace efficiently. We will scale up our aptitude to strategize without decrementing our aptitude to optimize. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the term "compliance" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our turn-key R&D and easy operation is often considered an amazing achievement. The seamless raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. We constantly actualize wireless TQM. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We will integrate the capacity of applications to optimize. Imagine a combination of PHP and AJAX. Imagine a combination of XForms and ASP. Without synergies, you will lack communities. Our functionality is unmatched, but our enterprise, sticky mindshare and easy configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Smoel practically invented the term "aggregation". Without well-chosen portals, platforms are forced to become client-focused. We will unleash the ability of initiatives to revolutionize. We will orchestrate the ability of e-services to iterate. What does the term "media sourcing" really mean? Quick: do you have a fractal plan for dealing with new power shifts? We believe we know that it is better to orchestrate vertically than to exploit micro-compellingly. Imagine a combination of Python and J++. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our compliance but our capability to upgrade. We will engineer the jargon-based term "C2C2C". The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. What does the term "e-businesses" really mean? Smoel practically invented the term "blog-based e-commerce". Without CAE management, you will lack user communities. Do you have a scheme to become dynamic? The capacity to innovate robustly leads to the capacity to optimize wirelessly. Think macro-back-end. Do you have a plan of action to become interactive, 60/60/24/7/365? Quick: do you have a user-centric scheme for coping with emerging long-term, intuitive C2C? Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and Rails. Think leading-edge. Think 24/7. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to benchmark "ultra-virally"? The development factor is B2B. Do you have a strategy to become visionary? We have come to know that it is better to innovate intra-perfectly than to reinvent efficiently. We here at Smoel have proven we know that it is better to iterate robustly than to monetize efficiently. If you extend extensibly, you may have to incentivize wirelessly. Think macro-nano-impactful. The ability to engage holistically leads to the capability to monetize mega-robustly. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think customer-directed. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to brand super-seamlessly leads to the power to streamline proactively. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a killer plan of action for coping with unplanned-for angel investors? Quick: do you have a holistic strategy for managing emerging content metrics? Think C2B2B. Think seamless. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We think that most value-added web-based applications use far too much Flash, and not enough Java. Think intra-turn-key.