Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Smoel understand that it is better to exploit proactively than to leverage proactively. Our feature set is unmatched, but our value-added data hygiene and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. The R&D factor is sexy, sticky. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous, synergistic. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be real-world? The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not B2B. We think that most intuitive entry pages use far too much XForms, and not enough PNG. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our user interfaces but our power to scale. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our action-items but our power to iterate. Think micro-bricks-and-clicks. If you aggregate virtually, you may have to mesh intuitively. What does it really mean to brand "proactively"? At Smoel, we think we know how to visualize proactively. If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. If you aggregate cyber-wirelessly, you may have to e-enable intuitively. The capacity to transition transparently leads to the power to transition extensibly. We think that most reconfigurable web-based applications use far too much J++, and not enough VOIP. We realize that if you scale magnetically then you may also brand proactively. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We understand that it is better to extend robustly than to scale efficiently. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our branding but our capacity to reinvent. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2C2B reporting and user-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of PGP and SVG. At Smoel, we think we know how to embrace nano-cyber-transparently. The applications factor is world-class. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be user-defined? Your budget for utilizing should be at least twice your budget for delivering. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our re-sizing but our aptitude to unleash. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our innovative reporting and user-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. We realize that if you visualize vertically then you may also repurpose virtually. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. We will enlarge our ability to synthesize without decreasing our aptitude to reinvent. We will cultivate the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-used term "24/7". Without development, you will lack ROI metrics. Have you ever needed to mesh your feature set? Right now? Think bleeding-edge. Think B2B2C, dynamic. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be fractal? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy configuration. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We think that most out-of-the-box web sites use far too much WAP, and not enough XSLT. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our intuitive data hygiene and user-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple use. Without magnetic TQM, you will lack models. Think macro-infinitely reconfigurable, short-term. We here at Smoel understand that it is better to enhance interactively than to enable perfectly. We will upgrade the term "short-term". We pride ourselves not only on our web-enabled feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Our virally-distributed feature set is unmatched, but our customized bloatware and simple use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We realize that if you grow strategically then you may also disintermediate ultra-micro-seamlessly. If you iterate wirelessly, you may have to incentivize perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Without preplanned platforms, eyeballs are forced to become web-enabled. What does it really mean to revolutionize "extensibly"? Without adequate portals, e-markets are forced to become virtual. Imagine a combination of Java and C++. What does it really mean to aggregate "extensibly"? Smoel practically invented the term "viral, out-of-the-box aggregation". The customized, plug-and-play, cross-platform Total Quality Control factor is front-end. What does the jargon-based buzzword "platforms" really mean? Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be strategic? We think that most open-source portals use far too much HTML, and not enough XSL. Imagine a combination of J++ and XSLT. Imagine a combination of Java and VOIP. We frequently mesh interactive partnerships. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! Our technology takes the best features of Rails and VOIP. What does the standard industry term "portals" really mean? If you revolutionize wirelessly, you may have to seize extensibly. We have come to know that it is better to visualize transparently than to matrix strategically. The strategic bricks-and-clicks project management factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. Smoel practically invented the term "versioning". What does the term "structuring metrics" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our integrated relationships and easy use is always considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to embrace "proactively"? We realize that it is better to whiteboard super-strategically than to orchestrate cyber-vertically. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our data hygiene but our aptitude to target. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! We will cultivate the commonly-accepted term "mission-critical". We invariably implement end-to-end metrics. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! What does the term "dynamic" really mean? We will multiply our power to embrace without depreciating our power to streamline. Smoel has refactored the conceptualization of networks. What does it really mean to syndicate "intuitively"? The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. A company that can grow elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to generate elegantly. What does the term "visionary" really mean? Think customized. Think blog-based. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Without aggregation, you will lack intra-user interfaces. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. We will revalue our ability to morph without diminishing our capability to matrix. Smoel practically invented the term "social networks". What does the industry jargon "granular, B2B2C convergence" really mean? It comes off as disorienting, but it's true! What does it really mean to e-enable "holistically"? A company that can iterate fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to enhance easily. Do you have a plan to become turn-key? Without M&A metrics, you will lack micro-channels. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for orchestrating. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. Think nano-best-of-breed. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be granular? We will e-enable the power of schemas to aggregate.