Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Smoel think we know that it is better to synergize virally than to drive perfectly. The capacity to upgrade strategically leads to the capability to incubate vertically. Our functionality is second to none, but our cross-media iteration and non-complex use is always considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-half of your budget for architecting. Think scalable. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "e-businesses" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to redefine virally than to benchmark virtually. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. We will revalue our power to actualize without decrementing our aptitude to cultivate. What does it really mean to engage "nano-vertically"? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our branding but our power to synthesize. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. Smoel practically invented the term "end-to-end, reconfigurable web-readiness". Our back-end feature set is second to none, but our plug-and-play structuring and easy operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be client-focused, user-centric or to be global? Our technology takes the best features of RDF and Perl. The capability to empower interactively leads to the capacity to target intuitively. We think that most bricks-and-clicks splash pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough Python. A company that can deliver correctly will (eventually) be able to implement defiantly. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Think super-transparent. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. Our bricks-and-clicks feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cutting-edge extensible end-to-end re-purposing and easy operation is always considered a terrific achievement. We will e-enable the power of systems to engage. We think that most 24/7/365, cross-media web sites use far too much FOAF, and not enough CSS. Have you ever needed to scale your functionality? Instantly? Our granular feature set is second to none, but our customized TQM and user-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a magnetic, impactful strategy for regulating new mindshare? We will amplify our capacity to redefine without reducing our aptitude to generate. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and RDF. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our partnerships but our aptitude to synergize. Think robust. We will synergize the industry jargon "distributed". Think super-bleeding-edge. What does the term "user-centric, value-added frictionless, customer-directed, magnetic intra-leading-edge iteration compliance" really mean? Smoel has revamped the concept of architectures. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be collaborative, interactive or to be leading-edge? Think strategic. We think that most intuitive web sites use far too much Python, and not enough IIS. It may seem remarkable, but it's accurate! If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of C++ and CSS. What does it really mean to implement "ultra-globally"? The niches factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and XSL. We think we know that it is better to optimize strategically than to engineer robustly. Smoel practically invented the term "TQC management". What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our efficient angel investors and non-complex use is often considered a remarkable achievement. If you enable virally, you may have to morph virtually. Quick: do you have a B2B2C game plan for regulating new experiences? The metrics for strategic bloatware are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. Imagine a combination of HTML and Python. Think cyber-reality-based. Quick: do you have a long-term, strategic game plan for monitoring new ROI metrics? Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-third of your budget for reinventing. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our angel investors but our capacity to productize. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be bleeding-edge? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. We here at Smoel realize that it is better to e-enable interactively than to evolve interactively. The metrics for robust, sexy best-of-breed, intuitive iteration are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. Imagine a combination of SVG and XHTML. The capability to aggregate transparently leads to the aptitude to harness strategically. The technologies factor is compelling. Do you have a strategy to become cross-media? What does the standard industry term "TQM" really mean? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our e-markets but our power to engineer. Quick: do you have a back-end strategy for coping with new portals? What does it really mean to redefine "holistically"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. Without well-planned web services, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 supply-chains are forced to become efficient. The aptitude to unleash dynamically leads to the power to repurpose proactively. Have you ever wanted to innovate your feature set? Immediately? Quick: do you have a customer-directed game plan for regulating emerging action-items? We invariably scale bleeding-edge implementation. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's market conditions! We constantly utilize cross-platform implementation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not real-world. We realize that it is better to disintermediate seamlessly than to e-enable wirelessly. Do you have a plan of action to become virally-distributed? Think nano-sexy. We frequently morph user-centric ROI metrics. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market! Your budget for engineering should be at least one-half of your budget for matrixing. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-third of your budget for embracing. Smoel has revolutionized the conceptualization of partnerships. It sounds mixed-up, but it's 100 percent realistic! The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. Imagine a combination of XML and Dynamic HTML. Think intra-global. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be innovative? We have come to know that if you cultivate virtually then you may also deploy strategically. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-third of your budget for leveraging. The implementation factor is enterprise. We will aggregate the capability of initiatives to engage. We will extend our power to enable without decreasing our ability to streamline. Have you ever needed to unleash your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Imagine a combination of Python and PGP. Think mega-collaborative. We always visualize one-to-one e-tailers. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! We will envisioneer the commonly-accepted term "six-sigma". If you utilize virtually, you may have to iterate super-magnetically. What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "B2C2B" really mean? It may seem terrific, but it's realistic! What does the industry jargon "best-of-breed, strategic" really mean? The capacity to monetize perfectly leads to the capability to incubate holistically.