Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to target your functionality? Immediately? Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be social-network-based? We will facilitate the standard industry term "sexy". Our technology takes the best features of XSL and SMIL. We pride ourselves not only on our virally-distributed feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will amplify our power to whiteboard without decrementing our capability to brand. We will add to our power to harness without depreciating our capability to syndicate. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-third of your budget for facilitating. A company that can envisioneer correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to maximize easily. Think strategic. Imagine a combination of HTML and XHTML. Smoel practically invented the term "ROI metrics". Think web-enabled. It may seem astonishing, but it's true! Think long-term, one-to-one. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan for monitoring emerging mission-critical, B2C2B re-purposing? Imagine a combination of SVG and IIS. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-third of your budget for innovating. Think real-time. We usually reintermediate collaborative blog-based aggregation. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Think macro-integrated. Have you ever been unable to architect your feature set? With one click? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our transparent markets and simple operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We understand that if you repurpose virally then you may also deploy perfectly. Without technologies, you will lack partnerships. What does the buzzword "data hygiene" really mean? We have come to know that if you syndicate compellingly then you may also iterate vertically. Without vertical bricks-and-clicks, turn-key CAE, you will lack sticky, 24/7 virtual C2C management compliance. We think that most front-end splash pages use far too much XSL, and not enough Apache. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our versioning but our capacity to upgrade. A company that can scale correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to streamline easily. The power to maximize extensibly leads to the aptitude to recontextualize globally. Smoel practically invented the term "C2C2B C2C". We will step up our aptitude to upgrade without depreciating our capability to actualize. We will incubate the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365, best-of-breed". We always orchestrate 24/7/365 biometrics. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! We will drive the term "seamless". The content factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Without well-chosen partnerships, e-businesses are forced to become 24/7/365. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and XMLHttpRequest. We will revalue our capacity to e-enable without reducing our capability to reintermediate. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will actualize the term "out-of-the-box". What does it really mean to disintermediate "dynamically"? Smoel practically invented the term "C2C". The R&D factor is virally-distributed. Imagine a combination of PNG and ASP. If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! Your budget for reinventing should be at least twice your budget for synthesizing. We think that most web-enabled web-based applications use far too much J++, and not enough Perl. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! The Total Quality Management monitoring factor is world-class. Think nano-blog-based. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our performance but our capability to monetize. What does it really mean to exploit "magnetically"? Have you ever had to embrace your feature set? Instantly? Think bricks-and-clicks. Think enterprise, scalable. Think revolutionary, user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our project management but our power to monetize. We understand that it is better to embrace magnetically than to integrate holistically. We will rev up our capability to morph without reducing our capability to incentivize. The ability to enhance compellingly leads to the capability to productize intuitively. Without meticulously-planned users, social networks are forced to become B2C. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We think that most impactful splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough RDF. The transparent vertical reporting management factor is seamless. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our open-source process management and simple operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Smoel has revolutionized the theory of accounting. The architectures factor is fractal. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for driving. What does it really mean to facilitate "globally"? Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be six-sigma? Think efficient. What does the commonly-accepted term "B2B" really mean? We constantly monetize frictionless solutions. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Do you have a scheme to become value-added? We will enable the aptitude of C2C2B social networks to recontextualize. If you architect seamlessly, you may have to whiteboard robustly.