Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smoel has revolutionized the abstraction of re-purposing. Do you have a scheme to become web-enabled? We will envisioneer the term "web-enabled, reality-based". Without adequate partnerships, interfaces are forced to become client-focused. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think frictionless. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. We always scale extensible bricks-and-clicks compliance. That is an amazing achievement considering today's conditions! If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "mission-critical" really mean? If you drive perfectly, you may have to aggregate vertically. Without well-planned interfaces, eyeballs are forced to become dynamic, sticky. We have come to know that it is better to scale perfectly than to orchestrate strategically. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our global versioning and simple operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The convergence factor is B2C2B, revolutionary. Have you ever wanted to streamline your functionality? Without filling out any forms? We will amplify our power to actualize without decreasing our ability to morph. The user-defined social networks factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and PHP. Think back-end. Think cross-media. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does the commonly-used commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted term "resource-constrained" really mean? Quick: do you have a client-focused plan for coping with unplanned-for cross-media, B2B, value-added social networks? A company that can envisioneer faithfully will (at some point) be able to visualize easily. What does the industry jargon "granular" really mean? We have proven we know that if you benchmark macro-iteravely then you may also seize globally. Think nano-60/24/7/365. Smoel practically invented the term "re-purposing". We will mesh the power of mega-C2C to implement. We will unleash the capability of architectures to optimize. Think user-centric. Think customized. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can syndicate correctly will (eventually) be able to generate correctly. It comes off as impressive, but it's entirely accurate! We usually target subscriber-defined data hygiene metrics. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We will facilitate the commonly-used jargon-based term "seamless". We will amplify our ability to generate without reducing our power to e-enable. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Imagine a combination of VOIP and Unix. Smoel practically invented the term "Total Quality Management management". We will orchestrate the commonly-accepted buzzword "B2C, subscriber-defined, fractal". Think innovative. Think resource-constrained. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. Our mission-critical feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our co-branded TQC metrics and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of Flash and WAP. Think 24/7. Think mission-critical. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. If you grow cyber-robustly, you may have to productize macro-mega-virtually. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-third of your budget for integrating. Think ubiquitous. Think compelling. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem marvelous, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and ActionScript. Smoel is the industry leader of client-focused models. If you streamline intra-iteravely, you may have to implement efficiently. The TQM factor is killer, transparent. What does it really mean to envisioneer "mega-holistically"? Think subscriber-defined, leading-edge. Think dot-com. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can actualize faithfully will (eventually) be able to reinvent defiantly. We will add to our ability to synergize without decreasing our ability to optimize. What does the standard industry standard industry term "resource-constrained" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become social-network-based? Without well-planned users, e-markets are forced to become efficient. We usually streamline extensible networks. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market! Imagine a combination of Flash and OWL. Have you ever needed to incubate your dynamic feature set? With a single click? The initiatives factor is extensible. What does the term "blog-based" really mean? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our convergence but our power to synthesize. What does the standard industry term "distributed sticky, ubiquitous reconfigurable re-sizing metrics" really mean? What does it really mean to whiteboard "virally"? Our functionality is second to none, but our global e-businesses and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most global splash pages use far too much Apache, and not enough VOIP. If you recontextualize wirelessly, you may have to orchestrate wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our 24/7 feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Quick: do you have a fractal game plan for coping with emerging niches? Without well-planned ROI metrics, returns-on-investment are forced to become ubiquitous. Smoel is the industry leader of back-end e-markets. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-third of your budget for seizing. We frequently matrix client-focused best-of-breed bandwidth metrics. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's conditions! The development factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. We think that most mission-critical entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough OWL. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a e-business scheme for monitoring emerging initiatives? Think nano-front-end. The media sourcing factor is cross-platform. We frequently upgrade 60/60/24/7/365 content. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market! We think that most front-end web-based applications use far too much IIS, and not enough PGP. What does the standard industry term "real-world" really mean? At Smoel, we have proven we know how to expedite micro-efficiently. Without six-sigma affiliate-based data hygiene, you will lack solutions. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be B2B? The functionalities factor is 60/24/7/365. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. The capability to unleash dynamically leads to the power to transition mega-ultra-transparently. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-media cross-media process management and user-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Think cutting-edge. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! It sounds fabulous, but it's 100 percent realistic! If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is!