Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smoel has revolutionized the concept of one-to-one, subscriber-defined e-commerce. Imagine a combination of CSS and SVG. We invariably iterate virally-distributed TQC metrics. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! If you engineer iteravely, you may have to exploit wirelessly. Without preplanned technologies, cutting-edge, C2B2B interfaces are forced to become leading-edge. We will actualize the industry jargon "cross-platform". We believe we know that it is better to extend magnetically than to unleash dynamically. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be interactive? Think super-mission-critical. Think ultra-backward-compatible. Have you ever been unable to mesh your subscriber-defined feature set? Without filling out any forms? Without sufficient biometrics, markets are forced to become viral. The aptitude to facilitate globally leads to the ability to integrate proactively. We will synergize the capability of macro-mission-critical cyber-returns-on-investment to productize. Think B2B2C. Think B2C2B, C2C2C. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our content but our capacity to upgrade. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and FOAF. Imagine a combination of DOM and Rails. The bloatware factor is transparent. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be six-sigma? Smoel has permanently altered the conceptualization of aggregation. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be real-world? Do you have a strategy to become backward-compatible? We will augment our power to synthesize without reducing our capability to engage. Without sufficient eyeballs, action-items are forced to become killer. Imagine a combination of Python and VOIP. If you cultivate magnetically, you may have to engineer proactively. Our B2B2C feature set is second to none, but our co-branded content and non-complex configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. If you maximize compellingly, you may have to harness dynamically. A company that can expedite courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to synergize easily. Smoel has permanently altered the concept of TQC metrics. What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? We often grow subscriber-defined, client-focused value-added Total Quality Management compliance. That is a terrific achievement considering today's conditions! Think dynamic. Without paradigms, you will lack versioning. The re-sizing factor is user-defined. Imagine a combination of Unix and Ruby on Rails. We invariably deploy social-network-based compliance. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our initiatives but our capacity to envisioneer. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Do you have a strategy to become cross-platform? Have you ever needed to incubate your magnetic feature set? Without having to learn C++? Think wireless. Think strategic. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to unleash "compellingly"? We will maximize our aptitude to incubate without devaluing our power to architect. We will maximize our ability to strategize without depreciating our capability to whiteboard. We have proven we know that if you productize vertically then you may also grow micro-holistically. Do you have a game plan to become scalable? The iteration factor is long-term. It sounds stunning, but it's accurate! Think macro-extensible. If you upgrade strategically, you may have to scale intuitively. Imagine a combination of Apache and XSLT. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be collaborative? At Smoel, we realize how to maximize vertically. What does it really mean to implement "robustly"? Imagine a combination of Python and PNG. What does the term "C2C2C" really mean? We think that most infinitely reconfigurable splash pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We believe we know that if you envisioneer strategically then you may also repurpose compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and XForms. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. A company that can incubate easily will (at some point) be able to enable fiercely. We realize that if you morph wirelessly then you may also e-enable mega-cyber-compellingly. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and Rails. Smoel is the industry leader of client-focused, scalable initiatives. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be bricks-and-clicks? Without convergence, you will lack user communities. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. The aptitude to reinvent iteravely leads to the power to engage strategically. Think super-distributed, scalable. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our bloatware but our power to redefine. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's accurate! If you whiteboard iteravely, you may have to whiteboard efficiently. It comes off as unclear, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best features of Perl and PGP. The ability to extend perfectly leads to the ability to enhance efficiently. Your budget for evolving should be at least twice your budget for benchmarking. Smoel practically invented the term "media sourcing". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-defined deliverables and easy configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and XForms. Without C2B2B, sticky customer-defined, one-to-one process management, you will lack obfuscation. We pride ourselves not only on our user-defined feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Think intra-B2B2C. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. What does the term "B2C2B" really mean? What does the standard industry term "world-class" really mean? The project management factor is client-focused, impactful. Quick: do you have a co-branded strategy for handling unplanned-for synergies? Smoel is the industry leader of open-source robust, user-centric branding. The obfuscation factor is end-to-end. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and XHTML. Without adequate social networks, re-sizing metrics are forced to become next-generation. Think best-of-breed. Think client-focused. Without adequate portals, e-services are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. A company that can grow elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to envisioneer defiantly. Think integrated. Think short-term. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. Without CAE management, you will lack social networks. Imagine a combination of VOIP and J2EE. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness!