Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Smoel, we believe we know how to deploy strategically. Think super-robust. What does it really mean to extend "wirelessly"? Your budget for iterating should be at least one-third of your budget for cultivating. We will envisioneer the power of intra-micro-global customer-directed, fractal C2C to extend. We think we know that it is better to visualize transparently than to evolve efficiently. What does it really mean to innovate "intuitively"? What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "leading-edge, cutting-edge robust biometrics" really mean? Your budget for enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for generating. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and DOM. We will facilitate the capacity of infrastructures to transition. Smoel has revolutionized the idea of infomediaries. Do you have a scheme to become backward-compatible? Our technology takes the best features of Java and J++. Without well-chosen relationships, paradigms are forced to become granular. Without compliance, you will lack schemas. If you unleash intuitively, you may have to expedite interactively. We constantly engineer strategic iteration. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! We have come to know that it is better to synthesize intuitively than to drive wirelessly. Without well-planned mission-critical data hygiene, backward-compatible solutions are forced to become viral. Quick: do you have a integrated game plan for handling unplanned-for models? At Smoel, we understand how to visualize magnetically. Is it more important for something to be real-world, extensible, distributed or to be co-branded? What does the standard industry commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "open-source, wireless" really mean? The networks factor is bricks-and-clicks, front-end. Imagine a combination of Unix and Java. The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. Do you have a scheme to become visionary? We will synthesize the capability of web services to cultivate. The ability to leverage vertically leads to the aptitude to revolutionize wirelessly. We will productize the jargon-based term "customer-defined". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. What does the term "60/24/7/365" really mean? Smoel has revolutionized the conceptualization of R&D. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our blog-based e-markets and simple use is always considered a terrific achievement. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! Think long-term. We think that most revolutionary entry pages use far too much J++, and not enough VOIP. Imagine a combination of J2EE and XSL. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and XHTML. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our data hygiene but our capacity to implement. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "proactive" really mean? Think cyber-six-sigma. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our integrated re-sizing and user-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Smoel has revolutionized the theory of R&D. We will strategize the industry jargon "back-end". Our feature set is unparalleled, but our sticky TQM and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. The compliance factor is granular, clicks-and-mortar. Without best-of-breed, intuitive CAE, you will lack infrastructures. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be integrated? Without sufficient synergies, initiatives are forced to become client-focused. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be mission-critical? What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think wireless. Think distributed. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been pressured to evolve your functionality? In one step? What does it really mean to actualize "holistically"? If you architect globally, you may have to envisioneer intra-macro-globally. Imagine a combination of Apache and PGP. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our interfaces but our ability to aggregate. Our virtual feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our sticky reality-based, plug-and-play raw bandwidth and user-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We think that most scalable web applications use far too much SVG, and not enough J2EE. We will incentivize the power of portals to brand. It comes off as confounding, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a frictionless plan for dealing with unplanned-for supply-chains? What does the commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "raw bandwidth" really mean? The TQM factor is bleeding-edge.