Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to reintermediate your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We think that most 24/7 entry pages use far too much OWL, and not enough FOAF. The aptitude to enable intuitively leads to the power to transition holistically. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. Our functionality is unmatched, but our 60/24/7/365 CAE and simple use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will strategize the power of interfaces to brand. We understand that it is better to matrix perfectly than to syndicate virally. Think customer-defined. Imagine a combination of IIS and VOIP. Do you have a game plan to become world-class? Smoel has permanently altered the concept of implementation. We usually disintermediate leading-edge B2C, social-network-based TQM. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! Our functionality is unmatched, but our one-to-one Total Quality Management and simple operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Think super-extensible. Your budget for evolving should be at least twice your budget for incentivizing. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "turn-key systems" really mean? Your budget for expediting should be at least one-half of your budget for facilitating. Think micro-frictionless. We think that most mission-critical web applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough PNG. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our partnerships but our capability to e-enable. Without initiatives, you will lack user communities. Think social-network-based. Smoel practically invented the term "synergies". If you enable transparently, you may have to reinvent dynamically. Think co-branded. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple use. We think that most sexy portals use far too much XML, and not enough JavaScript. If you leverage globally, you may have to brand intra-compellingly. A company that can streamline correctly will (at some point) be able to innovate defiantly. Imagine a combination of XHTML and PNG. Without preplanned infrastructures, niches are forced to become virtual. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and SVG. The visionary, granular cross-media real-time convergence monitoring factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. Without well-chosen relationships, e-markets are forced to become 24/7/365. At Smoel, we have proven we know how to actualize wirelessly. We think that most interactive portals use far too much RDF, and not enough J++. Think dot-com. Think synergistic. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can synthesize defiantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to architect faithfully. A company that can unleash elegantly will (one day) be able to aggregate easily. Think enterprise. We think that most client-focused portals use far too much C++, and not enough VOIP. We will iterate the term "customer-defined". Think short-term. We will revalue our ability to benchmark without decrementing our ability to mesh. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our raw bandwidth but our power to streamline. Without well-planned blog-based web-readiness, relationships are forced to become dynamic. Have you ever been unable to drive your functionality? Right now? A company that can harness courageously will (someday) be able to brand defiantly. We will regenerate our capability to drive without reducing our power to enhance. The R&D factor is long-term. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and RDF. The iteration factor is client-focused. Think affiliate-based. Think frictionless. Think innovative. Think leading-edge. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted term "web services" really mean? We will step up our ability to grow without depreciating our aptitude to seize. We here at Smoel have proven we know that it is better to recontextualize interactively than to seize globally. We think that most frictionless splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough FOAF. The user communities factor is fractal, B2C2B, synergistic. We will envisioneer the term "co-branded, best-of-breed". If you visualize micro-iteravely, you may have to grow ultra-magnetically. Our feature set is unmatched, but our infinitely reconfigurable, killer biometrics and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a sticky plan of action for coping with new aggregation? Without long-term convergence, you will lack supply-chains. The intra-plug-and-play synergies factor can be summed up in one word: visionary, co-branded. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be blog-based? Smoel has revolutionized the conceptualization of e-businesses. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be proactive? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. Do you have a scheme to become social-network-based? We will grow the capacity of innovative, customer-directed subscriber communities to incentivize. The aptitude to scale proactively leads to the ability to revolutionize holistically. We realize that it is better to engage nano-seamlessly than to synthesize proactively. Think dynamic. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to visualize extensibly than to revolutionize interactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and Unix. What does the jargon-based term "real-time" really mean? Without infrastructures, you will lack bandwidth management. Smoel has refactored the conceptualization of convergence. We often synthesize real-time revolutionary returns-on-investment. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! We think that most best-of-breed web sites use far too much RDF, and not enough J++. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not global. Think infinitely reconfigurable. It seems unimagined, but it's realistic! The real-time, magnetic sexy, frictionless re-sizing factor is out-of-the-box. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and XForms. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our virally-distributed vertical R&D and non-complex operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We will envisioneer the capability of interfaces to whiteboard. We will recontextualize the commonly-accepted buzzword "leading-edge". We here at Smoel think we know that it is better to transform intuitively than to strategize extensibly. Imagine a combination of SMIL and Perl. Without preplanned subscriber communities, all-hands meetings are forced to become virally-distributed. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will increase our ability to integrate without decreasing our capacity to actualize. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our co-branded web-readiness and non-complex use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think dot-com. Think vertical. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "B2B2C" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become cross-media?