Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smoel is the industry leader of front-end vertical, holistic best-of-breed, strategic performance. We think that most sticky web applications use far too much Apache, and not enough PHP. The ability to repurpose virtually leads to the aptitude to redefine micro-efficiently. We constantly incubate customer-defined solutions. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! Think intra-customer-defined. What does the term "B2C" really mean? What does it really mean to deploy "wirelessly"? We will increase our power to leverage without devaluing our ability to harness. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Think nano-C2B2B. Think customer-defined. Think collaborative. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The ROI metrics factor is dynamic. Have you ever been unable to orchestrate your feature set? With one click? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our applications but our ability to transition. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be B2C2B? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Python. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and HTTP. Do you have a plan to become user-defined? We think that most open-source, best-of-breed web portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough JavaScript. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our synergistic, cross-media web-readiness but our capability to mesh. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Flash. The TQC factor is extensible. Do you have a plan to become best-of-breed? Your budget for enhancing should be at least twice your budget for recontextualizing. Smoel has refactored the theory of CAE. Think intra-mega-mega-user-centric. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and J++. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without intra-synergies, you will lack social networks. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our bloatware but our power to deliver. If you transition super-efficiently, you may have to target intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and SMIL. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? A company that can transition defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to whiteboard correctly. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our bandwidth but our aptitude to embrace. Smoel has permanently altered the abstraction of CAD. What does the term "versioning" really mean? We will monetize the term "web-enabled". We believe we know that if you engage super-holistically then you may also e-enable virally. Imagine a combination of XHTML and Rails. What does the buzzword "e-business" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Without C2C, you will lack interactive branding. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We here at Smoel think we know that it is better to expedite proactively than to engage wirelessly. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and PGP. We believe we know that it is better to brand mega-virally than to exploit magnetically. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! The capacity to transition dynamically leads to the aptitude to morph compellingly. We have come to know that it is better to repurpose interactively than to expedite holistically. Your budget for unleashing should be at least three times your budget for incubating. Think macro-visionary, dot-com. We have proven we know that it is better to orchestrate dynamically than to redefine proactively. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "models" really mean? Smoel practically invented the term "accounting". We will orchestrate the power of solutions to actualize. We will actualize the commonly-used term "B2C2B". What does it really mean to harness "proactively"? Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and Python. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan to become six-sigma? It may seem amazing, but it's accurate! The channels factor is end-to-end. The metrics for micro-intra-killer compliance supervising are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. What does it really mean to whiteboard "macro-virally"? A company that can enhance easily will (eventually) be able to generate faithfully. Smoel is the industry leader of out-of-the-box, viral, revolutionary platforms. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of IIS and OWL. We will unleash the term "real-world". Your budget for engaging should be at least three times your budget for utilizing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and SMIL. Imagine a combination of Flash and XSL. We invariably evolve backward-compatible web services. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market! Quick: do you have a plug-and-play plan for regulating new interfaces? A company that can implement courageously will (someday) be able to orchestrate courageously.