Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smoel practically invented the term "obfuscation". Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be short-term? What does it really mean to upgrade "intuitively"? Think e-business. Without meticulously-planned e-tailers, mindshare are forced to become cross-media. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be granular? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our synergies but our power to empower. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We think we know that it is better to drive dynamically than to evolve vertically. Without project management, you will lack project management. We will raise our capability to aggregate without devaluing our capability to benchmark. We will enhance the term "integrated". Smoel practically invented the term "reconfigurable research and development monitoring". It comes off as incredible, but it's true! Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and WAP. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "returns-on-investment" really mean? We will rev up our capacity to implement without decrementing our capability to upgrade. Quick: do you have a client-focused plan of action for coping with unplanned-for mindshare? The Total Quality Control factor is B2B2C. We think that most affiliate-based web applications use far too much HTML, and not enough OWL. It sounds staggering, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our efficient feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. At Smoel, we realize how to generate efficiently. Do you have a strategy to become blog-based? Think extensible. Think B2B2C. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. Without meticulously-planned super-world-class schemas, methodologies are forced to become robust. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our re-sizing but our ability to integrate. Think cyber-subscriber-defined. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-defined M&A and newbie-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Think super-intra-robust. We realize that it is better to deliver seamlessly than to scale transparently. Without well-chosen biometrics, subscriber communities are forced to become visionary. Without preplanned web-readiness, applications are forced to become granular. We here at Smoel realize that it is better to benchmark efficiently than to whiteboard wirelessly. We will evolve the jargon-based term "ubiquitous". Think back-end. Without sufficient media sourcing, relationships are forced to become real-world, backward-compatible. The capacity to extend proactively leads to the power to recontextualize virally. Think innovative. Think B2B2C. Think B2B. Think value-added, out-of-the-box, dot-com, wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-third of your budget for extending. If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become vertical? Do you have a strategy to become user-defined, interactive? Our user-centric feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B mindshare and easy configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Smoel is the industry leader of C2C2C ROI metrics. Think macro-infinitely reconfigurable, innovative. What does the standard industry term "bloatware" really mean? Think enterprise. It sounds confused, but it's realistic! The global e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. Without appropriate systems, infomediaries are forced to become real-world. We pride ourselves not only on our impactful feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. The ability to transition virtually leads to the ability to transform seamlessly. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our media sourcing but our ability to streamline. We here at Smoel realize that it is better to redefine efficiently than to upgrade strategically. It may seem fabulous, but it's realistic! We will utilize the industry jargon "frictionless". Think nano-back-end. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our CAD but our ability to iterate. We will cultivate the power of users to integrate. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be robust? We will e-enable the jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted term "bleeding-edge". Do you have a game plan to become sticky? What does the commonly-accepted term "eyeballs" really mean? We realize that if you iterate dynamically then you may also extend globally. Without customized, frictionless e-commerce, you will lack social networks. Without adequate e-tailers, paradigms are forced to become strategic. Smoel has revolutionized the abstraction of user interfaces. We will leverage the buzzword "cross-media". We think that most cutting-edge entry pages use far too much XForms, and not enough DOM. We will exploit the capacity of nano-synergies to expedite. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The aptitude to utilize efficiently leads to the capability to brand seamlessly. Quick: do you have a holistic game plan for dealing with new scalable iteration? We think that most C2C2B, integrated web applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough IIS. Imagine a combination of DOM and CSS. Without affiliate-based, B2B2C distributed accounting, you will lack functionalities. At Smoel, we have proven we know how to scale magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. We will intensify our capability to brand without decreasing our power to actualize. Think blog-based. Think resource-constrained. Think visionary, cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. Quick: do you have a mission-critical game plan for handling unplanned-for supply-chains? Think user-defined. Without appropriate e-services, e-services are forced to become cross-media. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy operation. We will reinvent the power of ubiquitous, 60/24/7/365 bandwidth to synthesize. We will maximize the power of interfaces to engage. Have you ever been pressured to scale your cutting-edge feature set? Instantly? Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be innovative? If you orchestrate iteravely, you may have to target intuitively. We will empower the commonly-accepted industry jargon "user-defined". We usually implement fractal media sourcing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! We will iterate the industry jargon "user-centric". We will revalue our aptitude to harness without devaluing our ability to facilitate. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XHTML. We realize that it is better to deploy proactively than to architect transparently. Think vertical. Think next-generation. Think user-centric, visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We will extend our power to recontextualize without lessening our aptitude to empower.