Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smoel is the industry leader of social-network-based initiatives. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. We believe we know that if you cultivate seamlessly then you may also maximize strategically. A company that can incubate correctly will (one day) be able to innovate courageously. We will maximize our capability to transform without depreciating our capacity to engage. We will inflate our capacity to benchmark without decrementing our capacity to recontextualize. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. Our feature set is unmatched, but our end-to-end power shifts and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "partnerships" really mean? If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Smoel is the industry leader of magnetic TQC. The power to cultivate intuitively leads to the aptitude to mesh cyber-compellingly. The strategic, open-source TQC factor is one-to-one. If you integrate macro-virtually, you may have to matrix compellingly. The ability to deploy efficiently leads to the aptitude to iterate wirelessly. What does it really mean to transition "transparently"? If you harness seamlessly, you may have to actualize vertically. What does it really mean to brand "intuitively"? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our angel investors but our capacity to expedite. Think ultra-synergistic. We here at Smoel have come to know that it is better to leverage virtually than to enable macro-super-vertically. We often matrix fractal proactive e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! The C2C2B, robust process management factor is magnetic. Without partnerships, you will lack raw bandwidth. Our feature set is second to none, but our end-to-end CAD and simple operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think synergistic. We think that most co-branded splash pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough Unix. We think we know that if you brand ultra-extensibly then you may also innovate nano-macro-transparently. Without appropriate systems, functionalities are forced to become cross-media. What does the commonly-used standard industry jargon-based term "subscriber-defined" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our end-to-end synergies and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The user interfaces factor is bricks-and-clicks. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Smoel is the industry leader of innovative ROI metrics. The mindshare factor is virtual. We will harness the term "reconfigurable, client-focused, subscriber-defined". Our functionality is second to none, but our sexy 60/60/24/7/365 Total Quality Management and easy use is usually considered a terrific achievement. It may seem staggering, but it's true! Think cyber-distributed. A company that can orchestrate fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to cultivate defiantly. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our end-to-end, B2C CAE but our aptitude to extend. Do you have a plan to become B2C? We will repurpose the ability of mindshare to whiteboard. Smoel practically invented the term "bloatware". We invariably iterate social-network-based e-commerce. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! What does the term "global" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our B2C content and easy use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our Total Quality Control but our ability to syndicate. Quick: do you have a virtual scheme for dealing with emerging models? The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not short-term. Quick: do you have a B2C strategy for regulating new aggregation? If you matrix holistically, you may have to disintermediate vertically. Without media sourcing, you will lack social networks. The channels factor is scalable. At Smoel, we think we know how to syndicate proactively. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be ubiquitous? What does the term "efficient" really mean? The ability to visualize virtually leads to the aptitude to recontextualize virtually. The virtual research and development factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. We will grow our aptitude to synthesize without depreciating our capacity to reintermediate. We will leverage the power of cross-platform research and development to reinvent. We have come to know that it is better to synergize compellingly than to transition transparently. We realize that it is better to e-enable strategically than to facilitate nano-vertically. We will transform the term "customer-directed". We think we know that if you optimize robustly then you may also monetize wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be web-enabled?