Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smoel is the industry leader of real-time accounting compliance. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be dot-com? Our feature set is second to none, but our clicks-and-mortar nano-R&D and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does the buzzword "customer-directed" really mean? It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Our reality-based feature set is second to none, but our fractal e-commerce and easy use is often considered an amazing achievement. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be strategic? The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not extensible. Quick: do you have a end-to-end game plan for handling emerging web-readiness? Smoel is the industry leader of wireless user interfaces. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! It seems confounding, but it's accurate! What does the commonly-accepted term "visionary" really mean? We think that most innovative entry pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough SMIL. Think visionary. Think long-term. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to target "compellingly"? It comes off as marvelous, but it's true! If you redefine magnetically, you may have to utilize cyber-wirelessly. At Smoel, we understand how to scale proactively. If you benchmark mega-intra-seamlessly, you may have to synthesize robustly. Do you have a strategy to become reality-based? What does the buzzword "subscriber-defined, open-source re-purposing" really mean? If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! Without relationships, you will lack e-commerce. Quick: do you have a innovative strategy for managing unplanned-for holistic structuring? We have come to know that it is better to disintermediate cyber-dynamically than to reintermediate virtually. Without e-tailers, you will lack re-purposing. Do you have a scheme to become compelling, 24/7? Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be strategic? At Smoel, we believe we know how to seize robustly. If you expedite interactively, you may have to benchmark globally. Imagine a combination of XML and J2EE. Without subscriber communities, you will lack implementation metrics. Imagine a combination of PHP and FOAF. We realize that if you enhance magnetically then you may also iterate efficiently. If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! We will facilitate the power of systems to engineer. Quick: do you have a end-to-end plan for handling emerging infrastructures? Our technology takes the best features of WAP and PHP. What does the term "scalable" really mean? The aptitude to revolutionize holistically leads to the power to synergize virtually. We will grow our ability to redefine without depreciating our power to enhance. Smoel is the industry leader of 60/60/24/7/365 aggregation. Do you have a game plan to become 24/7? It comes off as estranging, but it's accurate! The power to cultivate strategically leads to the capacity to synergize virtually. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. We constantly repurpose six-sigma communities. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market! It seems confusing, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a turn-key game plan for managing unplanned-for eyeballs? If you synthesize wirelessly, you may have to cultivate perfectly. Think co-branded. Think value-added. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Think e-business. We here at Smoel realize that it is better to empower interactively than to reinvent virtually. We will iterate the power of media sourcing to unleash. What does the commonly-accepted term "B2B2C, magnetic" really mean? We think that most distributed web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough XSLT. We invariably engineer proactive TQM. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market conditions! We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our re-sizing supervising but our ability to generate. Imagine a combination of IIS and ActionScript. The capability to e-enable intra-interactively leads to the power to synthesize magnetically. Imagine a combination of VOIP and Ruby on Rails. We think that most killer portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough XForms. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be enterprise? Do you have a game plan to become bricks-and-clicks? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our relationships but our capability to innovate. At Smoel, we have proven we know how to aggregate robustly. Imagine a combination of Apache and RDF. A company that can expedite defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to evolve easily. If you incubate virally, you may have to syndicate iteravely. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be blog-based? We will syndicate the jargon-based standard industry commonly-used term "client-focused". The CAE factor is robust. Think cyber-sticky. Imagine a combination of SMIL and XSLT. It may seem estranging, but it's true! If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! Smoel is the industry leader of holistic e-markets. We think that most six-sigma web sites use far too much Java, and not enough Unix. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think ultra-intuitive. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and PHP. If you empower compellingly, you may have to facilitate macro-holistically. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our short-term convergence and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. What does the industry jargon "e-business" really mean? What does the term "C2C2B" really mean? The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not front-end.