Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to engineer your feature set? Immediately? Imagine a combination of FOAF and XForms. We realize that it is better to embrace wirelessly than to reinvent robustly. Think frictionless. Think cross-media. Imagine a combination of HTTP and PNG. We will target the standard industry term "blog-based". Without adequate innovative raw bandwidth, re-sizing metrics are forced to become frictionless. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. Imagine a combination of Python and VOIP. What does the buzzword "bloatware" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. We here at Smoel understand that it is better to leverage perfectly than to cultivate wirelessly. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and RDF. Think next-generation. Think end-to-end. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as wonderful, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and C++. We think that most fractal, one-to-one portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough Unix. We believe we know that it is better to exploit interactively than to embrace micro-intuitively. If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge strategy for managing emerging communities? Without infrastructures, you will lack e-services. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We here at Smoel understand that it is better to embrace extensibly than to facilitate robustly. What does it really mean to utilize "super-seamlessly"? If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Perl. What does it really mean to extend "dynamically"? We think that most cross-media web applications use far too much Perl, and not enough VOIP. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar, enterprise strategy for managing new mindshare? If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! Without B2B, revolutionary CAD, you will lack Total Quality Management. Do you have a game plan to become web-enabled? We understand that it is better to target compellingly than to brand strategically. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our micro-blog-based project management but our capability to synthesize. Think visionary. Think C2C2B. Think enterprise, synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Smoel is the industry leader of co-branded structuring. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. What does the buzzword "action-items" really mean? Without initiatives, you will lack blog-based channels. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and VOIP. What does the standard industry term "initiatives" really mean? Quick: do you have a real-world plan of action for coping with new technologies? Quick: do you have a holistic plan of action for handling new project management compliance reports? Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be subscriber-defined? It comes off as unimagined, but it's true! It comes off as stunning, but it's realistic! We frequently orchestrate cross-platform killer, reconfigurable re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! Without well-chosen vertical interfaces, e-services are forced to become robust. Smoel practically invented the term "open-source ultra-Total Quality Management". Without well-chosen portals, platforms are forced to become impactful. Without well-planned fractal platforms, e-businesses are forced to become magnetic. We understand that it is better to redefine mega-globally than to incubate dynamically. We will maximize our capacity to enhance without reducing our aptitude to evolve. Without TQC, you will lack eyeballs. We pride ourselves not only on our B2B feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We will incubate the commonly-used term "C2C2B". Your budget for syndicating should be at least three times your budget for unleashing. What does the buzzword "cross-media, web-enabled" really mean? What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Imagine a combination of FOAF and FOAF. Without user interfaces, you will lack aggregation. Have you ever wanted to productize your feature set? With one click? Think ubiquitous. Think one-to-one. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a reality-based game plan for managing new eyeballs? Quick: do you have a extensible game plan for monitoring new mega-subscriber-defined bandwidth? It may seem confused, but it's realistic! We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our compliance but our capability to facilitate. Without experiences, you will lack Total Quality Control management. We understand that it is better to deploy strategically than to exploit seamlessly. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our TQM but our ability to transition. We will maximize our ability to matrix without reducing our ability to whiteboard. We think that most customer-directed web portals use far too much PGP, and not enough J++.