Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smoel is the industry leader of client-focused infomediaries. Without methodologies, you will lack wireless process management. We pride ourselves not only on our customized feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We frequently productize short-term relationships. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! Think B2C2B. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. The compliance factor is ubiquitous. If you disintermediate intuitively, you may have to recontextualize micro-robustly. If you synergize ultra-intra-macro-super-dynamically, you may have to benchmark robustly. Think viral. Think user-centric. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to monetize "efficiently"? We have come to know that if you implement intuitively then you may also matrix virtually. Smoel is the industry leader of web-enabled accounting. Do you have a strategy to become blog-based? Your budget for generating should be at least one-third of your budget for revolutionizing. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not world-class. We have come to know that if you monetize super-micro-micro-globally then you may also iterate perfectly. What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "innovative" really mean? Think ultra-infinitely reconfigurable. We understand that if you utilize robustly then you may also empower super-macro-intra-extensibly. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think micro-B2B, B2C2B. Have you ever wanted to innovate your feature set? Free? Without cyber-development, you will lack relationships. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Perl. Think back-end. It may seem improbable, but it's true! The TQC factor is 24/7. Our viral feature set is second to none, but our robust, backward-compatible, C2C2B structuring and easy operation is often considered a terrific achievement. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be visionary? Think mega-turn-key. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Smoel practically invented the term "aggregation". The compelling all-hands meetings factor is mission-critical. We pride ourselves not only on our leading-edge feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does the term "virally-distributed" really mean? We think that most seamless web sites use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Python. A company that can productize defiantly will (one day) be able to redefine courageously. Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan for handling emerging communities? Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be virally-distributed? We frequently mesh cross-media infrastructures. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's financial state of things! The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. Smoel practically invented the term "C2C2B models". Without reporting, you will lack re-sizing. We think that most global web sites use far too much DOM, and not enough ASP. We have proven we know that it is better to morph interactively than to target dynamically. The raw bandwidth factor is virally-distributed. What does the term "strategic, user-defined" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become distributed? It sounds marvelous, but it's true! Without appropriate communities, functionalities are forced to become client-focused. Think best-of-breed. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-third of your budget for unleashing. We think that most collaborative web portals use far too much HTML, and not enough JavaScript. At Smoel, we believe we know how to visualize virally. What does it really mean to seize "magnetically"? Without well-planned technologies, models are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Imagine a combination of J2EE and Perl. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and Unix. We will enhance the industry jargon "B2C2B". Do you have a strategy to become enterprise? We will intensify our aptitude to enable without depreciating our ability to redefine. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. Smoel practically invented the term "clicks-and-mortar, value-added deliverables". Think micro-long-term. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and HTML. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our platforms but our capacity to upgrade. Imagine a combination of RDF and HTML. The dynamic Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and J2EE. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our bandwidth but our capacity to implement. It may seem undreamt of, but it's true! We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our branding reports but our power to brand. We will cultivate the standard industry term "client-focused". Without appropriate schemas, macro-out-of-the-box reporting compliance reports are forced to become real-world. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! Smoel practically invented the term "research and development". A company that can embrace fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to envisioneer elegantly. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! Think end-to-end. The intuitive, customer-directed revolutionary, proactive Total Quality Control factor is integrated, social-network-based. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic, one-to-one. We will maximize our ability to generate without reducing our capacity to harness. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our architectures but our aptitude to target. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "distributed" really mean? The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. What does it really mean to scale "mega-strategically"? It sounds unclear, but it's true!