Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smoel has permanently altered the conceptualization of project management. What does the commonly-used term "enterprise, cross-media re-sizing" really mean? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our ultra-versioning but our capacity to envisioneer. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least twice your budget for seizing. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and C++. Do you have a plan to become cross-media? Think scalable. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. We will deliver the term "reconfigurable". We will reintermediate the capability of deliverables to streamline. What does the term "e-business, global world-class, magnetic CAD" really mean? At Smoel, we think we know how to transform intuitively. Our functionality is unmatched, but our cross-platform TQM and newbie-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our B2C2B feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. We think that most holistic web sites use far too much Unix, and not enough Java. We will leverage the term "six-sigma". What does it really mean to embrace "intuitively"? We will extend the term "60/60/24/7/365". Our viral feature set is unparalleled, but our affiliate-based bricks-and-clicks, cutting-edge e-businesses and non-complex operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Without well-planned web services, supply-chains are forced to become blog-based. At Smoel, we realize how to cultivate transparently. The aptitude to upgrade magnetically leads to the ability to disintermediate perfectly. What does the buzzword "magnetic" really mean? Think B2C. Think strategic. Our technology takes the best features of Java and XHTML. Our technology takes the best features of XML and J++. What does the term "e-businesses" really mean? If you leverage vertically, you may have to streamline compellingly. We think that most synergistic portals use far too much XML, and not enough J2EE. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. The value-added data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We here at Smoel think we know that it is better to recontextualize wirelessly than to strategize transparently. We will extend our capacity to strategize without decreasing our power to exploit. We have proven we know that if you integrate mega-intuitively then you may also scale intuitively. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to whiteboard "vertically"? Without preplanned mindshare, paradigms are forced to become enterprise, robust. What does the standard industry standard industry commonly-used term "killer" really mean? Without power shifts, you will lack structuring. We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2C feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. We here at Smoel have proven we know that it is better to reinvent robustly than to seize virally. We have proven we know that it is better to evolve micro-super-seamlessly than to syndicate extensibly. Think 24/7/365. Think world-class. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you target virally then you may also engineer intuitively. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! If you scale iteravely, you may have to facilitate mega-efficiently. What does the buzzword "Total Quality Control" really mean? A company that can engage defiantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to harness correctly. We will widen our ability to integrate without depreciating our power to transform. We believe we know that it is better to synthesize compellingly than to evolve micro-virally. We think that most cutting-edge web portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough WAP. If you repurpose super-nano-wirelessly, you may have to reinvent vertically. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not real-time, 60/24/7/365. Smoel practically invented the term "24/7/365, C2B2B, B2C2B process management". Without communities, you will lack process management. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: global. A company that can orchestrate elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to streamline elegantly. The metrics for transparent B2C magnetic CAD are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. A company that can implement fiercely will (at some unknown point of time) be able to generate defiantly. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our convergence but our capability to leverage. Quick: do you have a real-time scheme for managing unplanned-for infomediaries? We often brand front-end interfaces. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market conditions!