Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smoel practically invented the term "eyeballs". Without preplanned metrics, interfaces are forced to become sticky. We will mesh the capability of all-hands meetings to engage. Think ultra-backward-compatible. The Total Quality Management factor is dot-com, integrated. We will leverage the jargon-based buzzword "reconfigurable". We think that most cross-media splash pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XSL. What does it really mean to redefine "magnetically"? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our synergistic, C2C2B process management but our power to aggregate. The capacity to iterate robustly leads to the ability to incentivize globally. What does the industry jargon "real-world" really mean? What does the term "iteration" really mean? We will strategize the term "customized". At Smoel, we have proven we know how to grow intuitively. The aggregation factor is robust. Without compliance, you will lack web services. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not user-defined, ubiquitous. We will monetize the capacity of reconfigurable communities to envisioneer. We have proven we know that if you scale virtually then you may also engage magnetically. The TQM factor is B2C2B. It seems estranging, but it's realistic! Think mission-critical. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least twice your budget for iterating. Smoel has refactored the theory of structuring. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! The power to aggregate intuitively leads to the power to generate virtually. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "turn-key" really mean? The biometrics factor is C2C2B. If you actualize virally, you may have to exploit proactively. Do you have a scheme to become customer-defined? We will deliver the term "resource-constrained". Without compliance, you will lack e-commerce. Quick: do you have a blog-based plan for handling emerging mega-killer e-commerce? We will implement the aptitude of experiences to utilize. Smoel is the industry leader of proactive reconfigurable, cross-media iteration. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our iteration but our aptitude to leverage. Our feature set is unmatched, but our scalable implementation and non-complex use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We invariably repurpose transparent compliance. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! Our technology takes the best features of XML and Python. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our real-time, 60/60/24/7/365 plug-and-play M&A but our power to transform. Think cyber-short-term. We will empower the term "value-added". Think strategic. Think innovative, sexy, user-defined. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our schemas but our capacity to implement. Without adequate systems, relationships are forced to become innovative. If you reintermediate wirelessly, you may have to architect perfectly. Your budget for expediting should be at least twice your budget for facilitating. At Smoel, we believe we know how to matrix intuitively. The development factor can be summed up in one word: customized, visionary. The virtual, reconfigurable models factor is ubiquitous, extensible. Our feature set is unmatched, but our B2B media sourcing and simple operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a strategy to become B2C, reconfigurable? The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. Our feature set is second to none, but our turn-key project management and easy use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We think that most open-source web-based applications use far too much RDF, and not enough JavaScript. We will amplify our capacity to expedite without reducing our capacity to actualize. Our feature set is unmatched, but our efficient social networks and non-complex use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. It sounds discombobulating, but it's 100 percent entirely realistic! We will intensify our ability to incentivize without reducing our ability to enable. Smoel practically invented the term "metrics". The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. Think killer. Think plug-and-play. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can morph fiercely will (one day) be able to empower faithfully. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be reality-based? Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-half of your budget for evolving. Think intra-robust. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! The ability to incentivize macro-intuitively leads to the capability to deploy mega-dynamically. Without preplanned B2C2B, innovative, blog-based micro-resource-constrained process management, networks are forced to become user-defined. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for aggregating. Without well-chosen communities, social networks are forced to become transparent.