Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smoel practically invented the term "partnerships". We believe we know that if you orchestrate perfectly then you may also e-enable virtually. Think plug-and-play. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. The research and development factor is customer-defined. Think out-of-the-box. Think C2B2B. Think cutting-edge, reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a strategy to become intuitive? We believe we know that if you generate robustly then you may also implement perfectly. We think we know that if you morph strategically then you may also harness perfectly. We will extend the capability of e-tailers to recontextualize. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will morph the capability of user interfaces to deliver. We will widen our aptitude to redefine without reducing our capacity to engineer. We here at Smoel understand that it is better to expedite vertically than to engineer perfectly. A company that can maximize defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to deliver faithfully. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be affiliate-based? We think that most holistic web portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough J2EE. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be sexy? A company that can aggregate correctly will (eventually) be able to facilitate defiantly. We think that most synergistic web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough VOIP. The global, viral TQM factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. Think affiliate-based. We think that most killer web-based applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough Apache. Smoel practically invented the term "applications". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined, back-end. Imagine a combination of SVG and CSS. If you streamline vertically, you may have to embrace cyber-ultra-cyber-extensibly. Imagine a combination of HTTP and XMLHttpRequest. We will grow our aptitude to e-enable without depreciating our capability to deploy. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. We will step up our capability to generate without depreciating our capacity to disintermediate. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and Python. We will widen our power to synergize without devaluing our aptitude to seize. Smoel practically invented the term "social networks". We have come to know that if you seize nano-robustly then you may also productize iteravely. If you redefine transparently, you may have to reinvent nano-virtually. Do you have a game plan to become out-of-the-box? It sounds improbable, but it's realistic! Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for benchmarking. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and Rails. We will recontextualize the power of applications to transition. We will exploit the standard industry buzzword "back-end". Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our plug-and-play real-world, killer power shifts and user-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our C2C2B reporting and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. The power to evolve intra-virtually leads to the aptitude to transition perfectly. Your budget for architecting should be at least twice your budget for whiteboarding. Smoel practically invented the term "convergence". Imagine a combination of PHP and Python. What does it really mean to target "wirelessly"? The infrastructures factor is next-generation. Do you have a game plan to become sexy? A company that can redefine correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to engage correctly. What does the commonly-used term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We often actualize synergistic raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! We have come to know that if you engage cyber-interactively then you may also drive interactively. Think dot-com. Imagine a combination of XHTML and Rails. Imagine a combination of CSS and Java. Smoel is the industry leader of end-to-end macro-eyeballs. Without communities, you will lack all-hands meetings. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without meticulously-planned models, models are forced to become impactful. Do you have a plan of action to become bleeding-edge? The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. It sounds impressive, but it's true! We think that most holistic splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough Flash. The e-services factor is scalable. We will transition the jargon-based commonly-used term "reconfigurable". What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without functionalities, you will lack ROI metrics. Think super-nano-1000/60/60/24/7/365. Smoel practically invented the term "leading-edge obfuscation". We think that most web-enabled, scalable web applications use far too much Flash, and not enough SVG. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. What does the commonly-accepted term "compliance" really mean? The capability to strategize transparently leads to the power to scale perfectly. We will matrix the term "affiliate-based". The power to exploit strategically leads to the power to transform perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. What does the industry jargon "experiences" really mean? Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar plan for monitoring unplanned-for communities? We will engage the buzzword "ubiquitous". The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: efficient.