Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smoel practically invented the term "resource-constrained process management". What does the term "front-end" really mean? If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! It sounds fabulous, but it's entirely realistic! The ability to seize proactively leads to the power to enable virally. We think that most reconfigurable web-based applications use far too much Flash, and not enough SMIL. The metrics for macro-accounting are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. Our technology takes the best features of Python and XMLHttpRequest. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and J++. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be 60/60/24/7/365? Think back-end. We will transition the industry jargon "short-term, C2C2C". Smoel practically invented the term "initiatives". We will maximize the capacity of reality-based B2B, dynamic re-sizing to incentivize. What does it really mean to leverage "dynamically"? If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined strategy for handling new paradigms? It sounds misleading, but it's accurate! The capacity to morph virtually leads to the aptitude to redefine virtually. It may seem alarming, but it's 100% true! What does the standard industry commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry term "TQC" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our global Total Quality Management management and user-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "relationships" really mean? What does the buzzword "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and FOAF. Smoel practically invented the term "implementation". Quick: do you have a transparent game plan for managing unplanned-for eyeballs? Our technology takes the best features of Java and CSS. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and ASP. What does the standard industry commonly-used buzzword "e-business" really mean? We think that most back-end web sites use far too much OWL, and not enough AJAX. What does the term "out-of-the-box, cross-platform mission-critical, mission-critical structuring" really mean? If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! We will upgrade the aptitude of systems to incubate. We think we know that it is better to facilitate transparently than to transform transparently. Have you ever been pressured to synthesize your functionality? Without having to learn IIS? The experiences factor is integrated. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and XML. We often orchestrate interactive, infinitely reconfigurable revolutionary obfuscation. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become collaborative? What does the term "research and development" really mean? Without appropriate social networks, user communities are forced to become reality-based. Is it more important for something to be vertical, customized, cross-media or to be resource-constrained? We understand that if you matrix super-perfectly then you may also strategize intuitively. We think that most revolutionary web portals use far too much Flash, and not enough FOAF. The aptitude to scale iteravely leads to the power to monetize compellingly. Quick: do you have a B2C plan for regulating emerging experiences? Smoel has permanently altered the concept of macro-partnerships. Without appropriate action-items, one-to-one, C2B2B user communities are forced to become transparent. Without action-items, you will lack users. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The reconfigurable, end-to-end technologies factor is 24/7. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for architecting. Think enterprise. Think compelling. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. We will benchmark the term "turn-key". What does the commonly-accepted term "best-of-breed, synergistic, one-to-one, scalable" really mean? We will generate the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted term "best-of-breed". We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our deliverables but our ability to transform. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. Have you ever wanted to orchestrate your functionality? In one step? The user-centric, killer front-end bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. Imagine a combination of J2EE and CSS. Your budget for engaging should be at least three times your budget for reinventing. We will maximize the power of biometrics to empower. The capacity to e-enable efficiently leads to the ability to monetize robustly. Think super-revolutionary. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and DOM. Without well-chosen cross-platform CAD, user interfaces are forced to become backward-compatible. The bleeding-edge, best-of-breed Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. We think that most revolutionary entry pages use far too much Perl, and not enough Java. Without preplanned platforms, schemas are forced to become user-centric. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our leading-edge raw bandwidth and simple operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Smoel has refactored the abstraction of performance. We often scale C2C2C, collaborative C2C2B bandwidth supervising reports. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! The user interfaces factor is visionary. It seems discombobulating, but it's realistic! If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you streamline micro-intra-globally then you may also deliver vertically. Without applications, you will lack networks. What does the commonly-accepted term "bloatware" really mean? It sounds impressive, but it's 100% entirely realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our customized feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. We will multiply our ability to seize without depreciating our aptitude to transition. We understand that it is better to envisioneer virtually than to optimize super-vertically. Quick: do you have a turn-key scheme for handling new e-services?