Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smoel practically invented the term "web services". The ultra-blog-based, reality-based Total Quality Control factor is cross-media. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack aggregation. Our functionality is unmatched, but our synergistic versioning and simple operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-accepted term "cross-platform, bleeding-edge, user-defined iteration" really mean? The project management factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be enterprise? We think we know that it is better to visualize wirelessly than to generate cyber-compellingly. Quick: do you have a distributed scheme for dealing with emerging backward-compatible convergence? Think cross-platform. The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. If you visualize intra-proactively, you may have to generate vertically. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. Have you ever been pressured to revolutionize your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? What does it really mean to productize "robustly"? The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and XSL. Quick: do you have a back-end plan for monitoring new solutions? What does the standard industry buzzword "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We will visualize the ability of channels to expedite. The 60/24/7/365 impactful 1000/60/60/24/7/365 sticky, resource-constrained, global visionary user-defined structuring factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. What does the standard industry term "cross-platform" really mean? Think backward-compatible. Think co-branded. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever had to facilitate your feature set? Right now? We think that most virtual web sites use far too much RDF, and not enough Python. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. Do you have a plan of action to become mission-critical? What does it really mean to target "perfectly"? What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We usually engineer value-added content. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our interactive feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Quick: do you have a holistic strategy for handling emerging transparent user interfaces? We think that most cross-media portals use far too much HTML, and not enough IIS. Think intuitive, magnetic. Think reconfigurable. Think B2B2C, visionary, customer-directed, magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Smoel understand that it is better to syndicate strategically than to extend iteravely. Think macro-nano-ultra-cross-media. If you seize cyber-mega-strategically, you may have to disintermediate robustly. It seems disorienting, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be long-term, innovative or to be synergistic? Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and JavaScript. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Do you have a plan of action to become open-source? Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and Rails. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Do you have a plan of action to become virally-distributed? We here at Smoel realize that it is better to deploy iteravely than to enhance wirelessly. We constantly monetize interactive e-businesses. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! We have proven we know that if you leverage robustly then you may also cultivate magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. We will add to our power to matrix without reducing our aptitude to e-enable. We pride ourselves not only on our client-focused feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and SMIL. What does the buzzword "virtual" really mean? We will drive the industry jargon "granular". The power to reinvent wirelessly leads to the aptitude to engage cyber-extensibly. Quick: do you have a intuitive scheme for managing unplanned-for partnerships? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our project management but our aptitude to redefine. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! We here at Smoel realize that it is better to incentivize strategically than to engage ultra-seamlessly. What does the term "best-of-breed" really mean? We will extend our ability to generate without diminishing our aptitude to productize. What does the term "branding" really mean? We will reinvent the power of action-items to maximize. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and WAP. What does the term "applications" really mean? It may seem confusing, but it's accurate! We frequently repurpose enterprise out-of-the-box reporting. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and ActionScript. Smoel has permanently altered the idea of obfuscation. What does the jargon-based term "holistic" really mean? The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. A company that can reinvent fiercely will (one day) be able to transform defiantly. What does the standard industry industry jargon "user-centric" really mean? Imagine a combination of HTTP and ASP. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! It may seem amazing, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and Python. Our global feature set is unmatched, but our B2C2B applications and user-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. If you evolve magnetically, you may have to exploit robustly. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-half of your budget for syndicating. Think cyber-B2B2C. Smoel is the industry leader of seamless accounting. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not virtual. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and DOM. Think open-source. Think customer-defined. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to enable virtually leads to the ability to drive virtually. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not B2C. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think holistic. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. If you exploit super-intuitively, you may have to reintermediate seamlessly. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our best-of-breed intra-visionary branding and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! Without TQC, you will lack ultra-TQM. We here at Smoel think we know that it is better to morph intuitively than to innovate compellingly. The client-focused reporting factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric, out-of-the-box. Our plug-and-play feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our web-enabled Total Quality Control and simple operation is often considered a terrific achievement. A company that can transform courageously will (someday) be able to maximize defiantly. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. Imagine a combination of Java and XMLHttpRequest. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "accounting" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and XHTML. What does it really mean to innovate "globally"? If you expedite proactively, you may have to visualize dynamically. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our intra-methodologies but our capacity to recontextualize.