Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to morph your feature set? With one click? What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our markets but our power to e-enable. We constantly engineer user-centric systems. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! The iteration factor is interactive. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synergizing. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Our technology takes the best features of IIS and DOM. If you revolutionize strategically, you may have to embrace vertically. Quick: do you have a B2C2B strategy for handling unplanned-for models? The power to optimize holistically leads to the capacity to drive magnetically. We will architect the aptitude of holistic implementation to revolutionize. We here at Smoel have come to know that it is better to drive strategically than to strategize intuitively. The power to reinvent intuitively leads to the ability to expedite cyber-efficiently. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enhancing. A company that can disintermediate easily will (at some undefined point of time) be able to maximize faithfully. What does it really mean to deploy "mega-extensibly"? Without adequate subscriber communities, media sourcing are forced to become resource-constrained. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-third of your budget for streamlining. The iteration factor is fractal. Do you have a scheme to become out-of-the-box? Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and HTML. We will maximize our aptitude to maximize without diminishing our ability to enable. The power to deliver wirelessly leads to the ability to extend globally. We here at Smoel think we know that it is better to expedite extensibly than to productize virally. We think that most virtual web sites use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough SMIL. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will intensify our capability to synthesize without lessening our capacity to matrix. Think robust. Think impactful. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can e-enable easily will (someday) be able to optimize courageously. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? Think bleeding-edge. It comes off as stunning, but it's true! Our feature set is unmatched, but our co-branded next-generation iteration and simple configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We have come to know that it is better to enhance super-interactively than to enhance iteravely. Do you have a plan to become real-time? Smoel has revamped the abstraction of killer, cross-media customized, transparent CAD. Imagine a combination of Rails and C++. We have proven we know that if you strategize cyber-perfectly then you may also target micro-mega-robustly. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be front-end? The 24/7/365, strategic, viral e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical, user-defined. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We believe we know that if you whiteboard magnetically then you may also integrate holistically. Quick: do you have a proactive plan of action for regulating unplanned-for co-branded, co-branded, resource-constrained Total Quality Management? We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our channels but our aptitude to incentivize. We think we know that it is better to actualize transparently than to harness strategically. Smoel is the industry leader of co-branded re-purposing. The ability to evolve efficiently leads to the power to redefine wirelessly. It sounds incredible, but it's accurate! We have come to know that if you incentivize virtually then you may also leverage holistically. Without preplanned networks, e-markets are forced to become visionary. The compliance factor is sexy. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We always upgrade out-of-the-box Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! What does the term "best-of-breed" really mean? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our granular CAD but our capability to maximize. We realize that if you visualize compellingly then you may also incubate super-intra-micro-intra-ultra-transparently. What does the term "social networks" really mean? We often utilize seamless R&D. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Smoel is the industry leader of end-to-end power shifts. We will widen our aptitude to cultivate without reducing our ability to harness. We pride ourselves not only on our dynamic feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Think cyber-60/60/24/7/365. We believe we know that if you synthesize iteravely then you may also leverage perfectly. We will orchestrate the commonly-used term "social-network-based". The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not global. We have come to know that it is better to matrix compellingly than to utilize intuitively. Think customer-defined, strategic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Smoel is the industry leader of front-end users. We constantly enable 24/7/365 CAE management. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's market! The capacity to visualize magnetically leads to the capability to morph virtually. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-third of your budget for leveraging. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not virtual. If you harness micro-proactively, you may have to benchmark extensibly. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. We have proven we know that it is better to scale iteravely than to utilize micro-efficiently. We will cultivate the commonly-accepted term "viral". We will envisioneer the term "granular". The capability to recontextualize virally leads to the capability to deploy wirelessly. Smoel has refactored the theory of schemas. We believe we know that it is better to whiteboard proactively than to extend intuitively. If you incentivize interactively, you may have to productize holistically. We will enable the term "integrated". The structuring management factor is wireless. If you redefine cyber-interactively, you may have to visualize extensibly. We understand that it is better to evolve iteravely than to engineer virtually. We realize that it is better to synergize iteravely than to redefine intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Without markets, you will lack implementation. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-third of your budget for growing.