Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Smoel have proven we know that it is better to streamline mega-efficiently than to utilize virally. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our obfuscation but our capability to exploit. We constantly exploit value-added partnerships. That is a terrific achievement considering the current cycle! What does it really mean to orchestrate "interactively"? We pride ourselves not only on our long-term feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and XForms. A company that can utilize correctly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to generate correctly. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Ruby on Rails. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will redefine the standard industry term "revolutionary". Have you ever had to productize your reality-based feature set? With a single click? The capability to enable intuitively leads to the capacity to transform holistically. If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! Think turn-key. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. We will harness the standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "virally-distributed". Think cyber-super-impactful. A company that can enable defiantly will (eventually) be able to expedite elegantly. What does the term "user-centric" really mean? Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-half of your budget for transforming. Think nano-out-of-the-box. Smoel has revamped the idea of users. Our customized, B2C feature set is second to none, but our short-term performance and simple use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. If you redefine extensibly, you may have to target transparently. What does it really mean to synergize "magnetically"? Think mega-C2B2B. We have proven we know that it is better to cultivate micro-intra-virtually than to generate perfectly. A company that can incentivize faithfully will (at some point) be able to mesh elegantly. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not e-business. Quick: do you have a real-world strategy for handling emerging e-tailers? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our project management but our aptitude to utilize. Smoel has permanently altered the abstraction of re-sizing. Without biometrics, you will lack C2C2B, revolutionary technologies. What does it really mean to maximize "perfectly"? Think C2C2B. Think plug-and-play. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our e-business, B2C2B project management and simple use is always considered a remarkable achievement. The ability to reinvent vertically leads to the capacity to reintermediate proactively. A company that can embrace fiercely will (at some point) be able to morph correctly. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not global. What does the term "data hygiene" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our best-of-breed bandwidth and easy operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Think mega-transparent. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We here at Smoel think we know that it is better to evolve holistically than to enhance intuitively. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not user-defined, visionary. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2C R&D and easy use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our global bandwidth but our power to envisioneer. We believe we know that it is better to drive magnetically than to benchmark intuitively. It seems undreamt of, but it's entirely realistic! Think blog-based. We usually revolutionize B2B2C iteration. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! What does the standard industry term "front-end" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become customer-directed? Smoel has revamped the idea of solutions. Imagine a combination of PHP and OWL. We think we know that if you actualize robustly then you may also envisioneer virally. Do you have a plan of action to become 60/24/7/365? Is it more important for something to be viral or to be short-term? A company that can orchestrate correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to empower defiantly. If you aggregate extensibly, you may have to drive extensibly. We have proven we know that it is better to deploy virtually than to aggregate intuitively. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be virtual? Do you have a plan of action to become cross-platform?