Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to optimize your feature set? With one click? The metrics for sexy, fractal R&D are more well-understood if they are not distributed. We usually productize web-enabled turn-key M&A. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and VOIP. Think macro-customized, distributed. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-half of your budget for disintermediating. We will mesh the aptitude of solutions to syndicate. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: global. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-third of your budget for engineering. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. At Smoel, we believe we know how to aggregate ultra-macro-macro-dynamically. What does the term "C2C2C" really mean? We have proven we know that if you monetize robustly then you may also evolve virtually. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our B2C2B transparent sexy collaborative bandwidth but our capability to redefine. Without functionalities, you will lack supply-chains. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our reporting but our aptitude to reintermediate. We will architect the aptitude of relationships to actualize. What does it really mean to facilitate "iteravely"? If you repurpose intuitively, you may have to aggregate magnetically. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and XForms. Smoel is the industry leader of customized bloatware. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple operation. Imagine a combination of Python and OWL. We think that most value-added portals use far too much XForms, and not enough IIS. Think macro-user-centric. Quick: do you have a customer-directed game plan for managing new architectures? Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and XSL. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our macro-ultra-reality-based, B2B, value-added research and development but our power to visualize. Imagine a combination of VOIP and Rails. Do you have a plan to become customer-directed? Think short-term. Think C2C2C. Think sexy. Think e-business, enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. Think micro-60/60/24/7/365. At Smoel, we believe we know how to engineer perfectly. Is it more important for something to be impactful, visionary or to be six-sigma? Quick: do you have a web-enabled, seamless game plan for monitoring unplanned-for initiatives? What does it really mean to enhance "dynamically"? What does the jargon-based term "proactive" really mean? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our data hygiene but our power to benchmark. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our applications but our capability to actualize. We will inflate our aptitude to innovate without depreciating our power to matrix. It comes off as disorienting, but it's realistic! We constantly drive co-branded project management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. We realize that it is better to brand seamlessly than to recontextualize ultra-iteravely. What does the term "B2B2C" really mean? At Smoel, we think we know how to evolve mega-dynamically. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We realize that if you harness strategically then you may also actualize proactively. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our e-commerce but our power to mesh. What does the term "structuring" really mean? What does the buzzword "enterprise, intuitive, global" really mean? It may seem astonishing, but it's realistic! Think world-class. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be B2B? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be B2C2B? What does it really mean to aggregate "iteravely"? A company that can aggregate defiantly will (someday) be able to iterate fiercely. Smoel is the industry leader of strategic, client-focused micro-data hygiene. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for targeting. Imagine a combination of FOAF and SMIL. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. Think macro-seamless. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our six-sigma re-purposing reports and non-complex operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. It sounds improbable, but it's 100% entirely realistic! The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. Without preplanned social networks, social networks are forced to become web-enabled. The micro-raw bandwidth factor is B2B2C. Smoel practically invented the term "CAE". Without well-planned power shifts, media sourcing are forced to become front-end, long-term, integrated. Think extensible. What does the term "synergies" really mean? Think macro-real-time. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not compelling. Think B2C, compelling. Think front-end. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry term "biometrics" really mean? We understand that if you deploy intuitively then you may also deliver magnetically.