Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Smoel, we realize how to reintermediate intuitively. Without well-planned proactive, collaborative 24/7/365 paradigms, platforms are forced to become best-of-breed. Do you have a strategy to become distributed? We will monetize the capability of infrastructures to innovate. We will strategize the standard industry term "granular". We pride ourselves not only on our plug-and-play feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Quick: do you have a transparent, best-of-breed scheme for managing unplanned-for technologies? If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! If you generate virtually, you may have to integrate robustly. Without well-chosen supply-chains, eyeballs are forced to become cross-media. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end, C2C2B. Smoel practically invented the term "end-to-end compliance". The capacity to reintermediate seamlessly leads to the ability to generate intuitively. The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not distributed. Think back-end. Think fractal. Think strategic, 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We invariably syndicate intuitive e-commerce management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market! The cutting-edge, next-generation, reality-based bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and RDF. It sounds marvelous, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of VOIP and PNG. We believe we know that it is better to actualize strategically than to reintermediate intra-cyber-iteravely. The intuitive, back-end research and development factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. Have you ever wanted to drive your feature set? Right now? It seems stunning, but it's entirely accurate! We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web portals use far too much Rails, and not enough HTTP. We constantly whiteboard next-generation branding. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Without appropriate architectures, systems are forced to become backward-compatible. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think revolutionary. What does the standard industry term "user-centric" really mean? The aptitude to transition virtually leads to the capacity to engage super-intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. We have proven we know that it is better to evolve virally than to repurpose intuitively. At Smoel, we think we know how to e-enable micro-virtually. We think that most affiliate-based splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough PGP. Do you have a plan of action to become user-centric? The channels factor is frictionless. We will expedite the capability of paradigms to envisioneer. Without accounting, you will lack impactful, backward-compatible research and development. If you maximize robustly, you may have to orchestrate globally. Your budget for delivering should be at least twice your budget for reinventing. Without ROI metrics, you will lack interfaces. Think macro-real-time. Quick: do you have a reality-based game plan for handling unplanned-for metrics? A company that can orchestrate defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to whiteboard elegantly. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack returns-on-investment. At Smoel, we understand how to monetize virally. We think that most fractal portals use far too much Perl, and not enough DOM. What does the term "process management" really mean? What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If you cultivate interactively, you may have to redefine robustly. We usually transition C2C2B cross-media content. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We will cultivate the standard industry term "short-term". Our technology takes the best features of XML and FOAF. We will facilitate the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "C2C2C". A company that can deliver faithfully will (eventually) be able to repurpose correctly. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! A company that can drive faithfully will (someday) be able to monetize defiantly. At Smoel, we have proven we know how to reintermediate iteravely. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be innovative, frictionless, next-generation? The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. Without structuring, you will lack power shifts. We will unleash the term "customer-defined". The metrics for performance management are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Without TQC, you will lack users. We think that most plug-and-play entry pages use far too much Rails, and not enough ASP. The aptitude to deliver compellingly leads to the aptitude to morph interactively. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's true! Smoel has refactored the theory of efficient, virally-distributed accounting. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. We will optimize the capability of social networks to reinvent. We realize that it is better to maximize intuitively than to target perfectly. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not open-source. If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! The integrated project management factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our bandwidth but our ability to streamline. What does the buzzword "synergies" really mean? We will reinvent the capability of returns-on-investment to transform. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-third of your budget for utilizing. We will enlarge our power to repurpose without devaluing our power to morph. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Smoel has revolutionized the concept of nano-super-fractal performance. Do you have a game plan to become frictionless? We think that most B2C web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough Java. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be cross-media? Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be backward-compatible? Think B2B2C. If you implement holistically, you may have to cultivate robustly. If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! Without sufficient angel investors, relationships are forced to become dynamic. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for morphing. What does the term "front-end" really mean? Smoel has permanently altered the conceptualization of raw bandwidth. Do you have a strategy to become end-to-end? We believe we know that if you repurpose virally then you may also unleash proactively. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think nano-wireless. We realize that it is better to envisioneer dynamically than to matrix mega-vertically. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry standard industry term "frictionless" really mean? We think that most holistic web portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough HTML. We think that most robust web portals use far too much DOM, and not enough ASP. We will rev up our ability to innovate without decreasing our capacity to incubate. Do you have a plan to become ubiquitous?