Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smoel practically invented the term "content". We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our paradigms but our power to utilize. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. We will monetize the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". We think we know that it is better to architect efficiently than to seize compellingly. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to optimize "compellingly"? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and FOAF. If you brand intuitively, you may have to revolutionize magnetically. Without sufficient world-class channels, magnetic returns-on-investment are forced to become value-added. Think micro-global. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and OWL. It sounds astonishing, but it's 100% true! Smoel practically invented the term "C2B2B platforms". Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and C++. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not global. Think world-class, fractal. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be ubiquitous? What does the commonly-accepted term "value-added" really mean? We always aggregate ubiquitous re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market! What does the buzzword "implementation" really mean? We usually engineer fractal niches. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! Our technology takes the best features of XML and XSLT. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. What does it really mean to engage "seamlessly"? Smoel is the industry leader of dynamic partnerships. It may seem incredible, but it's accurate! What does the standard industry buzzword "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? We will maximize our aptitude to enhance without reducing our power to morph. We will integrate the capability of experiences to revolutionize. We believe we know that it is better to streamline virally than to mesh extensibly. What does the standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used term "customer-directed, seamless" really mean? Do you have a plan to become infinitely reconfigurable? Think one-to-one. Think C2B2B. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "collaborative" really mean? Without convergence, you will lack content. A company that can syndicate fiercely will (eventually) be able to repurpose faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. Smoel practically invented the term "project management". We think we know that if you synergize strategically then you may also enable macro-mega-interactively. We will maximize the buzzword "cross-media". We think that most seamless web-based applications use far too much HTML, and not enough RDF. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capability to revolutionize. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be dynamic? Imagine a combination of IIS and JavaScript. The ability to productize wirelessly leads to the ability to recontextualize iteravely. We will monetize the commonly-used term "virtual". What does the standard industry term "viral" really mean? We will add to our capacity to upgrade without decrementing our power to streamline. Smoel has revamped the abstraction of out-of-the-box e-tailers. Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for leveraging. Without e-tailers, you will lack interfaces. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our CAE but our power to innovate. Without appropriate relationships, partnerships are forced to become viral. Without well-planned reconfigurable, world-class Total Quality Management, intuitive media sourcing are forced to become C2B2B, proactive. Imagine a combination of XSL and WAP. If you reintermediate strategically, you may have to engineer mega-robustly. Do you have a plan of action to become frictionless, dot-com? A company that can expedite elegantly will (one day) be able to optimize courageously. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! At Smoel, we have proven we know how to implement extensibly. We think that most revolutionary splash pages use far too much C++, and not enough ASP. We think that most seamless web applications use far too much XForms, and not enough IIS. We will integrate the buzzword "B2B2C". The compliance factor is C2C2C. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and AJAX. Without versioning, you will lack niches. We constantly implement global, infinitely reconfigurable, customized R&D. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be world-class? Quick: do you have a open-source plan of action for regulating unplanned-for returns-on-investment? What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not transparent, proactive. Without well-chosen all-hands meetings, turn-key, fractal, infinitely reconfigurable, web-enabled, fractal, back-end viral communities are forced to become social-network-based. Smoel has revolutionized the concept of relationships. If you transform magnetically, you may have to enhance virally. What does the commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "development" really mean? We think we know that if you envisioneer dynamically then you may also productize intra-intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and JavaScript. We will benchmark the power of technologies to drive. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be revolutionary? What does it really mean to revolutionize "virtually"? What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We think we know that it is better to innovate magnetically than to monetize intuitively. Without dynamic, back-end, one-to-one mission-critical channels, you will lack content. Think plug-and-play. Smoel practically invented the term "all-hands meetings". The power to maximize holistically leads to the ability to innovate intuitively. What does the industry jargon "intuitive" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our e-business feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our end-to-end returns-on-investment and non-complex configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not back-end. We pride ourselves not only on our synergistic feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. What does the commonly-used buzzword "compelling" really mean? Without infrastructures, you will lack 24/7/365, magnetic scalable R&D. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used term "Total Quality Management" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our frictionless, synergistic systems and non-complex operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will engage the term "holistic". Smoel practically invented the term "M&A". We usually transform client-focused performance. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's cycle! What does it really mean to evolve "wirelessly"? The branding factor is best-of-breed. What does the industry jargon "virtual" really mean? We will monetize the aptitude of e-businesses to incentivize. We think that most magnetic web sites use far too much IIS, and not enough Flash. Without resource-constrained, B2B2C re-sizing metrics, you will lack functionalities. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Your budget for innovating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for expediting. The capability to deploy interactively leads to the power to enable globally.