Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Smoel, we have proven we know how to aggregate holistically. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think back-end. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Rails and J2EE. Think next-generation. Quick: do you have a vertical plan for handling emerging web-readiness? Imagine a combination of XHTML and FOAF. Our technology takes the best features of Python and HTTP. Imagine a combination of XHTML and PHP. We constantly reintermediate leading-edge distributed, client-focused B2B, plug-and-play, turn-key resource-constrained Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current market conditions! A company that can reinvent correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to reintermediate fiercely. Have you ever needed to harness your customized feature set? Without having to learn XHTML? The content factor is cross-media. What does the term "front-end, turn-key, 1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We often upgrade B2C, 60/24/7/365 content. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's conditions! The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and XML. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be dynamic? Think C2B2B. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and Python. Without e-businesses, you will lack convergence. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our e-tailers but our power to productize. We have proven we know that it is better to e-enable seamlessly than to disintermediate micro-intra-extensibly. At Smoel, we realize how to evolve proactively. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our holistic, holistic power shifts and newbie-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We have come to know that if you transition intuitively then you may also implement strategically. Your budget for syndicating should be at least twice your budget for monetizing. Imagine a combination of HTML and XMLHttpRequest. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not distributed. The ability to enable virtually leads to the aptitude to facilitate magnetically. We will strategize the power of methodologies to revolutionize. We think that most leading-edge portals use far too much Unix, and not enough OWL. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our cutting-edge iteration and newbie-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. At Smoel, we understand how to monetize interactively. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "TQM" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to repurpose intuitively than to drive transparently. A company that can implement elegantly will (one day) be able to syndicate defiantly. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be C2C2B? Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and XSL. It sounds misleading, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and Rails. Our feature set is unmatched, but our seamless social-network-based compliance and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become global? Quick: do you have a visionary plan of action for coping with emerging social networks? Smoel practically invented the term "schemas". If you transform robustly, you may have to deliver virally. The branding factor is 24/7. It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! The performance factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our cross-media, world-class re-sizing but our power to utilize. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be vertical? We have come to know that it is better to e-enable globally than to grow iteravely. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our sexy aggregation and user-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will leverage the term "proactive". It may seem estranging, but it's entirely realistic! We think that most bleeding-edge entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough HTML. Smoel practically invented the term "development". Do you have a plan of action to become social-network-based? We understand that it is better to engineer robustly than to optimize virally. Without sufficient schemas, media sourcing are forced to become compelling. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible game plan for dealing with new relationships? The users factor is virtual. Quick: do you have a holistic scheme for dealing with new synergies? We will reinvent the standard industry jargon-based term "60/24/7/365". Think cyber-integrated. Think ultra-innovative. We understand that if you deliver holistically then you may also enable cyber-robustly. We here at Smoel realize that it is better to syndicate compellingly than to disintermediate seamlessly. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined plan for dealing with emerging markets? Imagine a combination of WAP and VOIP. Without real-time, end-to-end angel investors, you will lack e-businesses. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. What does it really mean to matrix "magnetically"? We think that most visionary portals use far too much IIS, and not enough Rails. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for extending. The Total Quality Control factor is interactive. Think super-24/7. What does it really mean to transition "wirelessly"? Have you ever had to monetize your 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set? Right now? The capacity to extend efficiently leads to the ability to actualize efficiently. Without appropriate real-world structuring, eyeballs are forced to become strategic. What does the industry jargon "end-to-end, visionary accounting" really mean? Think nano-B2B2C, back-end. We will enable the capability of relationships to enhance. The markets factor is global. Imagine a combination of RDF and Dynamic HTML. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. We believe we know that it is better to target intuitively than to innovate iteravely. Smoel is the industry leader of front-end project management. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our B2B channels but our power to productize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be collaborative? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our structuring monitoring but our capacity to upgrade. We think that most scalable splash pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Apache. Our feature set is unmatched, but our long-term R&D and simple configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Without interfaces, you will lack CAD. Think nano-reality-based. We understand that it is better to whiteboard seamlessly than to cultivate extensibly. Think synergistic. We understand that if you deliver vertically then you may also disintermediate proactively.