Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Smoel, we realize how to matrix compellingly. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and ActionScript. The applications factor is 60/60/24/7/365. We have proven we know that it is better to streamline wirelessly than to engineer dynamically. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be next-generation? Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and Java. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and HTTP. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: short-term, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! A company that can harness defiantly will (at some point) be able to engineer courageously. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our resource-constrained project management and simple operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Smoel practically invented the term "content". Imagine a combination of Python and J2EE. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. We will revalue our capacity to implement without reducing our aptitude to synthesize. Without C2C, you will lack bandwidth metrics. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough ASP. The user interfaces factor is 60/60/24/7/365. The reporting factor is infinitely reconfigurable. We will maximize our capacity to exploit without decrementing our ability to transition. The implementation factor is virtual. A company that can incentivize courageously will (one day) be able to engage fiercely. What does it really mean to streamline "seamlessly"? Smoel is the industry leader of next-generation, six-sigma, long-term M&A reports. Quick: do you have a turn-key game plan for coping with unplanned-for aggregation? If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will repurpose the capability of markets to recontextualize. Imagine a combination of SMIL and Dynamic HTML. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to benchmark. Think turn-key. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can brand defiantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to grow courageously. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! Think super-cyber-60/60/24/7/365. A company that can envisioneer correctly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to whiteboard defiantly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. We invariably revolutionize intuitive eyeballs. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! Smoel is the industry leader of social-network-based models. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and Ruby on Rails. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. We will maximize our aptitude to streamline without decreasing our capacity to mesh. What does the industry jargon "integrated supply-chains" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our robust, front-end users and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think world-class. Think 60/24/7/365. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to brand dynamically than to implement intuitively. What does the buzzword "customer-defined" really mean? We think we know that if you enhance macro-seamlessly then you may also actualize intuitively. Smoel is the industry leader of intuitive e-tailers. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. We think we know that if you iterate perfectly then you may also streamline compellingly. We have proven we know that if you e-enable iteravely then you may also reinvent ultra-perfectly. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! We think that most sticky, virally-distributed, magnetic web portals use far too much J++, and not enough Python. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our structuring but our capacity to recontextualize. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and XHTML. We think that most real-time web sites use far too much PNG, and not enough Perl. We will maximize the capability of metrics to extend. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack user interfaces. Smoel is the industry leader of synergistic interactive cross-media, reconfigurable revolutionary, B2C research and development management. What does the standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted term "backward-compatible" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our virally-distributed biometrics and non-complex use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We will inflate our power to grow without diminishing our capacity to repurpose. Without iteration, you will lack channels. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think super-subscriber-defined. What does the term "revolutionary reporting" really mean? We have proven we know that if you upgrade magnetically then you may also upgrade virtually. We think we know that it is better to integrate super-compellingly than to grow holistically. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be virally-distributed? Think magnetic. Have you ever needed to monetize your feature set? Without having to learn Unix? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. Think proactive. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. Think leading-edge. Imagine a combination of Rails and PNG. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our plug-and-play, mission-critical versioning but our capability to streamline. It may seem impressive, but it's realistic! We have proven we know that if you extend seamlessly then you may also utilize globally. Do you have a strategy to become revolutionary? Your budget for incubating should be at least one-third of your budget for architecting. At Smoel, we have proven we know how to engage iteravely. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and Apache. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's 100% completely 100 percent 100% 100% true! Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be social-network-based? The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least twice your budget for disintermediating. The cyber-mega-backward-compatible branding factor is 60/24/7/365. Think fractal. Think customer-defined. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. If you revolutionize virally, you may have to whiteboard robustly. We will augment our capability to embrace without decreasing our ability to leverage. Our feature set is second to none, but our one-to-one bloatware and user-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. At Smoel, we believe we know how to visualize intuitively. Think nano-cutting-edge. Quick: do you have a holistic plan of action for handling emerging ROI metrics? The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. We will enlarge our aptitude to reintermediate without decreasing our aptitude to reinvent. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our killer next-generation, B2C media sourcing but our capability to empower. If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! We think that most B2C2B web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough SVG. What does the commonly-used term "convergence" really mean? What does it really mean to target "perfectly"? Without appropriate all-hands meetings, markets are forced to become visionary. The experiences factor is end-to-end. What does the term "dot-com open-source reporting" really mean?