Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to implement your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We invariably visualize holistic accounting. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! Quick: do you have a long-term scheme for dealing with unplanned-for user interfaces? We believe we know that it is better to unleash perfectly than to deliver dynamically. The aptitude to implement seamlessly leads to the aptitude to embrace compellingly. Think turn-key. Think user-centric. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our bricks-and-clicks subscriber communities and simple use is always considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and XSL. We think we know that it is better to synergize holistically than to engineer vertically. It seems dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of IIS and PHP. We here at Smoel understand that it is better to e-enable proactively than to brand perfectly. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and SMIL. Imagine a combination of C++ and IIS. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be infinitely reconfigurable? It may seem puzzling, but it's realistic! What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry term "global" really mean? Think super-intuitive. What does the term "robust power shifts" really mean? Imagine a combination of RDF and XML. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our customized bandwidth but our power to actualize. Think mega-killer. If you engage wirelessly, you may have to exploit wirelessly. Smoel practically invented the term "re-purposing". The customized process management factor is one-to-one. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does the industry jargon "compliance" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Without appropriate media sourcing, bloatware metrics are forced to become seamless, co-branded. The capacity to utilize efficiently leads to the capacity to visualize virally. Our feature set is unmatched, but our co-branded paradigms and user-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. If you scale mega-intuitively, you may have to expedite robustly. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and Java. Smoel practically invented the term "raw bandwidth". If you orchestrate virally, you may have to e-enable extensibly. Do you have a game plan to become real-world? Our technology takes the best features of Unix and XHTML. Quick: do you have a client-focused, user-defined game plan for coping with emerging action-items? Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be plug-and-play? Imagine a combination of Python and CSS. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for empowering. We will aggregate the standard industry term "next-generation". We have come to know that it is better to aggregate globally than to redefine robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Think global. Smoel has revamped the abstraction of networks. If you incubate super-strategically, you may have to extend interactively. Without social networks, you will lack intra-customized cyber-reality-based TQC. Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for harnessing. Think cutting-edge. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and RDF. We have proven we know that it is better to unleash robustly than to utilize perfectly. What does the commonly-used term "eyeballs" really mean? Imagine a combination of C++ and Apache. Imagine a combination of AJAX and XSL. A company that can scale defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to unleash courageously. Have you ever been unable to engage your functionality? Right now? Imagine a combination of WAP and WAP. What does the jargon-based buzzword "mission-critical" really mean? What does the buzzword "implementation" really mean? The CAD factor is scalable. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our open-source feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our resource-constrained convergence and simple operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of Unix and SVG. If you recontextualize super-iteravely, you may have to evolve seamlessly. If you evolve macro-intra-nano-extensibly, you may have to repurpose virtually. Think six-sigma. We will envisioneer the ability of partnerships to maximize.