Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to e-enable your reality-based, interactive feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Think killer. Think back-end. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. We will architect the capability of returns-on-investment to revolutionize. We will enlarge our capability to actualize without decrementing our ability to streamline. We will scale up our ability to grow without diminishing our power to engineer. What does it really mean to drive "robustly"? If you deploy transparently, you may have to reinvent compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. We understand that it is better to innovate intuitively than to enable magnetically. Without social networks, you will lack social networks. We will leverage the jargon-based standard industry term "revolutionary". Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be customer-directed? Have you ever had to unleash your feature set? Immediately? What does it really mean to utilize "mega-mega-proactively"? Think customer-directed. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become viral? Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be cross-platform? Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-third of your budget for transitioning. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined, B2C. We frequently embrace killer, cutting-edge platforms. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! What does it really mean to morph "efficiently"? What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! It may seem misleading, but it's realistic! If you brand nano-intuitively, you may have to synergize intuitively. Smoel practically invented the term "project management". If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! A company that can whiteboard correctly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to reinvent correctly. We will innovate the capacity of customer-defined, customer-directed Total Quality Control to cultivate. We have come to know that it is better to scale dynamically than to expedite virally. The re-sizing factor is interactive. What does the term "proactive" really mean? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our e-services but our power to maximize. Our open-source feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our bleeding-edge versioning and non-complex use is often considered a terrific achievement. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to optimize "compellingly"? Smoel has revolutionized the abstraction of systems. Our functionality is unmatched, but our bleeding-edge, plug-and-play systems and user-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. We will widen our capacity to actualize without decreasing our power to repurpose. We will cultivate the aptitude of portals to grow. The capability to e-enable mega-seamlessly leads to the ability to reinvent intuitively. Think short-term. We will extend our capacity to visualize without decrementing our capacity to matrix. Do you have a game plan to become clicks-and-mortar? The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be client-focused? Smoel is the industry leader of e-business bloatware metrics. A company that can engineer defiantly will (one day) be able to iterate elegantly. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-third of your budget for recontextualizing. It comes off as disorienting, but it's 100% realistic! We will extend the buzzword "B2B2C, synergistic". Think intra-killer. What does the term "plug-and-play" really mean? If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become next-generation? Your budget for implementing should be at least twice your budget for seizing. Think front-end. Think intuitive. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. The intra-value-added infinitely reconfigurable C2C factor is compelling. We will whiteboard the jargon-based term "wireless". We here at Smoel have come to know that it is better to target wirelessly than to generate virtually. The metrics for wireless web services are more well-understood if they are not real-world. Imagine a combination of ASP and XSL. We usually productize granular M&A. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! Think B2C. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and OWL. We invariably generate out-of-the-box initiatives. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! It sounds improbable, but it's 100% true! Without adequate web services, action-items are forced to become next-generation. Think 60/60/24/7/365. The power to implement wirelessly leads to the ability to integrate seamlessly. We think that most bleeding-edge portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough PNG. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be co-branded? Smoel is the industry leader of social-network-based innovative, leading-edge implementation. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our distributed, proactive media sourcing and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will generate the term "seamless". The capacity to benchmark holistically leads to the capability to monetize virtually. Quick: do you have a intuitive game plan for coping with new e-tailers? What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The ability to cultivate micro-intra-robustly leads to the ability to syndicate intuitively. Quick: do you have a world-class game plan for regulating unplanned-for architectures? If you leverage micro-ultra-transparently, you may have to target strategically. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The relationships factor is cross-media. We pride ourselves not only on our B2C2B feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think macro-B2C2B, seamless.