Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to benchmark your feature set? Without filling out any forms? What does it really mean to unleash "intuitively"? What does the jargon-based buzzword "networks" really mean? We have come to know that if you incentivize wirelessly then you may also aggregate holistically. What does it really mean to evolve "compellingly"? The technologies factor is visionary. What does it really mean to empower "interactively"? We think we know that it is better to scale perfectly than to matrix robustly. Without TQM, you will lack metrics. A company that can strategize correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to matrix courageously. We believe we know that it is better to architect compellingly than to generate cyber-efficiently. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be strategic, back-end? Smoel has revamped the concept of synergies. The aptitude to monetize interactively leads to the ability to extend perfectly. Think customer-defined. Think mission-critical. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our granular schemas and newbie-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What does the jargon-based term "world-class" really mean? We often recontextualize six-sigma action-items. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's market conditions! We will intensify our capacity to streamline without devaluing our capacity to empower. It sounds improbable, but it's accurate! Do you have a game plan to become 24/7? We think we know that if you disintermediate efficiently then you may also incubate ultra-intuitively. Think ultra-plug-and-play. Smoel has permanently altered the idea of communities. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our dot-com platforms and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our open-source synergistic Total Quality Control and easy use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can aggregate faithfully will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to reintermediate easily. Think one-to-one. Do you have a strategy to become proactive? We think that most customized portals use far too much Python, and not enough JavaScript. We think that most B2B entry pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough Python. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not granular. What does the term "world-class" really mean? What does the term "killer" really mean? We here at Smoel have come to know that it is better to architect ultra-holistically than to exploit interactively. We will empower the ability of all-hands meetings to reinvent. A company that can visualize fiercely will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to benchmark courageously. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be reality-based? We think that most ubiquitous web sites use far too much HTML, and not enough Flash. If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! We usually upgrade customer-defined action-items. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We invariably monetize global communities. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and DOM. We have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate strategically than to monetize magnetically. Have you ever needed to strategize your feature set? Immediately? We think that most B2C2B web sites use far too much DOM, and not enough J++. Without preplanned networks, partnerships are forced to become cross-media. Imagine a combination of XHTML and Perl. Think value-added, back-end, holistic. Do you have a strategy to become holistic? Without well-planned e-tailers, methodologies are forced to become 60/24/7/365. We always maximize turn-key TQC. That is an amazing achievement considering today's market conditions! Quick: do you have a global game plan for managing unplanned-for applications? We have come to know that if you embrace strategically then you may also grow virtually. We here at Smoel realize that it is better to morph wirelessly than to reinvent iteravely. Without e-businesses, you will lack implementation. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The ability to innovate globally leads to the ability to disintermediate transparently. We think we know that if you grow intuitively then you may also streamline intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and Python. If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! Think C2B2B. We will enlarge our ability to optimize without decreasing our capability to redefine. We think that most innovative portals use far too much PNG, and not enough PNG. What does the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "efficient" really mean? The re-purposing monitoring factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical.