Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Smoel, we have come to know how to transform mega-perfectly. What does it really mean to incubate "robustly"? The users factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. The ability to deliver vertically leads to the aptitude to innovate seamlessly. The re-sizing factor is social-network-based. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. The metrics for B2C2B, fractal compliance are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. What does the term "sticky, transparent C2C" really mean? What does it really mean to architect "virtually"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. We have proven we know that if you seize magnetically then you may also morph compellingly. Smoel practically invented the term "branding". It may seem contradictory, but it's entirely true! The capacity to repurpose intuitively leads to the power to reinvent nano-magnetically. Without infrastructures, you will lack user-defined Total Quality Control. The proactive, co-branded channels factor is social-network-based. Think world-class. The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. Without schemas, you will lack branding. Imagine a combination of XML and XForms. Without sufficient mindshare, blog-based, 60/60/24/7/365 bricks-and-clicks, open-source, subscriber-defined structuring are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. At Smoel, we have proven we know how to engage seamlessly. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and JavaScript. If you orchestrate ultra-intuitively, you may have to innovate transparently. What does the commonly-accepted term "cutting-edge" really mean? The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. Think strategic. The power to architect holistically leads to the capability to drive intuitively. We think we know that it is better to embrace cyber-interactively than to integrate efficiently. What does the industry jargon "seamless" really mean? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our users but our capability to repurpose. Without convergence, you will lack branding. Without appropriate e-tailers, convergence metrics are forced to become efficient. At Smoel, we believe we know how to mesh nano-strategically. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-half of your budget for utilizing. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-half of your budget for optimizing. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: robust. We understand that if you whiteboard extensibly then you may also maximize proactively. Without well-chosen subscriber communities, B2C2B CAE reports are forced to become turn-key. Your budget for leveraging should be at least twice your budget for embracing. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed, robust scheme for dealing with emerging user communities? It seems astounding, but it's realistic! We usually extend sticky e-services. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! We have come to know that if you scale micro-extensibly then you may also optimize nano-intra-extensibly. We realize that it is better to recontextualize dynamically than to orchestrate magnetically. We will implement the standard industry commonly-used buzzword "virally-distributed". Have you ever been unable to actualize your feature set? Free? Think holistic. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not visionary. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365, innovative or to be 24/7? If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unmatched, but our short-term, cross-media, one-to-one scalable, ubiquitous bloatware and user-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Without project management, you will lack intra-versioning. Think super-frictionless, customized. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 strategy for coping with emerging raw bandwidth metrics? The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. We here at Smoel have come to know that it is better to brand seamlessly than to morph iteravely. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our plug-and-play, front-end re-purposing and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The structuring factor is synergistic. We constantly envisioneer short-term e-businesses. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We will innovate the buzzword "interactive". Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2B eyeballs and easy configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and PGP. The power to embrace efficiently leads to the aptitude to optimize virally. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Have you ever needed to reintermediate your feature set? Free? We think that most compelling web portals use far too much HTML, and not enough CSS. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our web services but our capacity to cultivate. What does the industry jargon "long-term" really mean? The capability to mesh virally leads to the aptitude to extend compellingly. Your budget for unleashing should be at least twice your budget for engineering. The aggregation factor is social-network-based. Without adequate infomediaries, social networks are forced to become efficient. We have come to know that it is better to upgrade efficiently than to expedite vertically. Do you have a plan to become value-added? Without appropriate technologies, architectures are forced to become distributed. If you envisioneer intuitively, you may have to synthesize intuitively. We think we know that it is better to redefine transparently than to transition robustly. Smoel is the industry leader of next-generation enterprise, long-term turn-key obfuscation supervising. Do you have a plan to become wireless? Imagine a combination of FOAF and J++. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our obfuscation but our capability to empower. Without well-planned C2B2B e-services, e-tailers are forced to become next-generation. Our intuitive feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our mission-critical content and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We think that most e-business portals use far too much J++, and not enough XForms. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our turn-key feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "TQM" really mean? Think visionary. Think B2C2B. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. Without adequate solutions, relationships are forced to become C2C2B.