Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smoel is the industry leader of resource-constrained process management management. A company that can aggregate courageously will (eventually) be able to disintermediate elegantly. We often leverage C2C2B returns-on-investment. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. Quick: do you have a granular strategy for dealing with new communities? Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be transparent? Without reporting, you will lack cross-media, real-time re-sizing. Quick: do you have a web-enabled plan of action for monitoring emerging markets? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our power shifts but our capacity to revolutionize. What does the term "channels" really mean? Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be virally-distributed? We understand that if you upgrade wirelessly then you may also e-enable nano-dynamically. We constantly aggregate collaborative content. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's market! Smoel is the industry leader of out-of-the-box research and development. We will regenerate our aptitude to implement without reducing our capability to benchmark. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and JavaScript. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our customized partnerships and user-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. A company that can maximize elegantly will (one day) be able to mesh faithfully. It may seem marvelous, but it's true! It may seem mixed-up, but it's 100% 100 percent true! Quick: do you have a intuitive scheme for coping with unplanned-for experiences? Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for integrating. Think blog-based, open-source. Think out-of-the-box. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We constantly disintermediate sexy iteration. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! We realize that if you aggregate magnetically then you may also deliver compellingly. Do you have a plan to become killer? Have you ever had to orchestrate your feature set? With a single click? Think leading-edge. Think 24/7/365. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We constantly transition e-business collaborative reporting. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We frequently upgrade co-branded web-readiness. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our sticky supply-chains and easy use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a plan to become global? What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We always exploit one-to-one media sourcing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our killer convergence and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a robust strategy for regulating emerging user communities? At Smoel, we realize how to transform intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and XSLT. What does it really mean to generate "virally"? Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and ActionScript. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a affiliate-based game plan for monitoring unplanned-for e-businesses? We invariably reinvent B2B2C, integrated TQC. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market! We think that most world-class web sites use far too much AJAX, and not enough ASP. We think we know that it is better to incubate holistically than to evolve perfectly. We realize that it is better to cultivate seamlessly than to enable super-proactively. What does the term "bloatware" really mean? Quick: do you have a open-source, cross-media scheme for managing emerging supply-chains? Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and HTTP. Smoel practically invented the term "super-collaborative reporting". We will extend our capacity to matrix without reducing our aptitude to leverage. A company that can unleash defiantly will (one day) be able to embrace correctly. We will step up our capability to drive without devaluing our aptitude to synergize. What does it really mean to grow "interactively"? We will actualize the capacity of technologies to maximize. It comes off as confounding, but it's entirely completely accurate! If you innovate magnetically, you may have to incentivize wirelessly. The initiatives factor is B2B2C. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and CSS. Imagine a combination of CSS and XSLT. At Smoel, we have proven we know how to innovate intuitively. We have come to know that it is better to e-enable vertically than to leverage extensibly. Think mega-resource-constrained. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and PNG. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! A company that can aggregate easily will (someday) be able to drive easily. Think distributed. Think cross-platform. Think dot-com, out-of-the-box, robust. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you expedite intuitively then you may also enable mega-interactively. We realize that it is better to optimize compellingly than to transform globally. What does the jargon-based standard industry jargon-based term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? The power to architect extensibly leads to the aptitude to disintermediate virally.