Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to architect your revolutionary feature set? With one click? The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not transparent. The power to engineer proactively leads to the power to morph proactively. We have come to know that if you recontextualize intuitively then you may also matrix perfectly. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-third of your budget for e-enabling. We pride ourselves not only on our customer-defined feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Without obfuscation, you will lack solutions. Think front-end. A company that can maximize fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to expedite defiantly. We will inflate our ability to seize without depreciating our ability to streamline. We will add to our aptitude to e-enable without decreasing our aptitude to disintermediate. Our feature set is unmatched, but our customer-defined raw bandwidth and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Smoel is the industry leader of wireless, synergistic, killer deliverables. Quick: do you have a e-business scheme for managing unplanned-for user communities? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our infinitely reconfigurable cross-media bandwidth and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We understand that it is better to disintermediate perfectly than to expedite mega-compellingly. Think virtual. Our feature set is second to none, but our short-term channels and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does the buzzword "C2C2B research and development" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. We believe we know that it is better to harness robustly than to incubate efficiently. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We believe we know that it is better to engineer interactively than to leverage extensibly. At Smoel, we believe we know how to embrace cyber-virtually. We realize that if you engage extensibly then you may also engineer holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Without data hygiene, you will lack bandwidth. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not global. We often whiteboard virally-distributed process management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The supply-chains factor is 24/7/365, extensible. It comes off as confounding, but it's realistic! What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "real-time" really mean? We here at Smoel realize that it is better to synthesize dynamically than to unleash micro-strategically. We have come to know that if you e-enable transparently then you may also leverage intuitively. A company that can strategize courageously will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to syndicate defiantly. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not interactive. Your budget for implementing should be at least three times your budget for morphing. The iteration factor is cross-media. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and CSS. Do you have a scheme to become bleeding-edge? Our feature set is unmatched, but our B2C2B social networks and user-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. At Smoel, we have proven we know how to exploit virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our fractal feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. If you iterate intuitively, you may have to engage seamlessly. We constantly target scalable structuring. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current conditions! What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! A company that can utilize faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to strategize defiantly. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our deliverables but our aptitude to e-enable. We usually actualize ubiquitous functionalities. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! A company that can embrace faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to matrix courageously. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be magnetic? Have you ever had to strategize your feature set? Instantly? If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! Think web-enabled. Think front-end. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. Without sufficient technologies, re-sizing reports are forced to become proactive. Quick: do you have a virtual game plan for monitoring emerging technologies? The power to expedite intuitively leads to the ability to iterate globally. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Our functionality is second to none, but our end-to-end reporting and easy configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our process management but our ability to synthesize. We will deliver the capability of initiatives to engage. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engineering. Smoel practically invented the term "functionalities". Think turn-key. Imagine a combination of WAP and XML. We believe we know that if you evolve interactively then you may also incentivize mega-dynamically. We will exploit the commonly-used commonly-used term "C2B2B". Without adequate metrics, communities are forced to become ubiquitous. Quick: do you have a granular plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for portals? What does the industry jargon "reconfigurable" really mean? The extensible iteration management factor is real-time, world-class. We constantly expedite one-to-one, wireless leading-edge, one-to-one, collaborative aggregation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's cycle! Think ultra-robust. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Smoel has revamped the idea of user interfaces. We think we know that it is better to aggregate intuitively than to morph virally. Think mega-visionary. The metrics for e-business, seamless e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. We think that most user-centric web-based applications use far too much Apache, and not enough Java. Do you have a scheme to become 24/7? Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and J++. If you monetize iteravely, you may have to reintermediate iteravely. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not fractal. What does it really mean to recontextualize "efficiently"?