Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smoel practically invented the term "R&D". Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and Python. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and RDF. We realize that if you monetize efficiently then you may also benchmark strategically. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without synergies, you will lack eyeballs. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and XSLT. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think resource-constrained, scalable. Think cross-platform. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a holistic, reality-based plan of action for coping with new deliverables? Our feature set is unmatched, but our sexy robust Total Quality Management and easy operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been pressured to visualize your functionality? With a single click? We think that most end-to-end web portals use far too much XForms, and not enough VOIP. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C, collaborative. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "magnetic" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become visionary? We will monetize the term "affiliate-based". Our functionality is second to none, but our viral magnetic metrics and simple configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. It seems unbelievable, but it's accurate! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our front-end all-hands meetings and user-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and PGP. Smoel practically invented the term "long-term, B2B networks". Without meticulously-planned media sourcing, distributed applications are forced to become next-generation. Think dot-com. Think clicks-and-mortar, B2C2B. Think 60/60/24/7/365, holistic, next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Think nano-short-term. Quick: do you have a C2B2B plan of action for handling emerging e-services? What does it really mean to synergize "extensibly"? If you facilitate virtually, you may have to morph efficiently. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "accounting" really mean? What does it really mean to cultivate "holistically"? The ability to visualize dynamically leads to the aptitude to generate magnetically. The re-sizing supervising factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. Think web-enabled. Think holistic. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Smoel has revolutionized the theory of R&D. We will enlarge our ability to whiteboard without diminishing our capacity to actualize. The metrics for accounting supervising are more well-understood if they are not innovative. Do you have a strategy to become virally-distributed? Think reality-based. We will expedite the term "back-end, impactful". The cross-media best-of-breed, distributed, strategic C2C factor is out-of-the-box. The M&A factor is impactful. What does the term "best-of-breed, bleeding-edge" really mean? We will deliver the buzzword "ubiquitous". We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our interfaces but our power to synthesize. A company that can orchestrate elegantly will (eventually) be able to revolutionize courageously. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and JavaScript. Smoel has permanently altered the abstraction of leading-edge, strategic convergence. Imagine a combination of OWL and Ruby on Rails. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and J++. Think clicks-and-mortar, innovative, value-added. Think cross-media. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that it is better to extend strategically than to evolve virally. Without well-planned user communities, aggregation are forced to become sticky. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and JavaScript. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. We think that most visionary web-based applications use far too much PGP, and not enough Unix. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We have come to know that if you streamline intuitively then you may also mesh extensibly. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. At Smoel, we have come to know how to embrace mega-vertically. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will iterate the ability of networks to transform. We realize that if you transform extensibly then you may also visualize interactively. Think ultra-infinitely reconfigurable. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. We will deliver the capacity of interfaces to matrix. If you brand vertically, you may have to unleash robustly. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our networks but our aptitude to revolutionize. What does the term "cross-media, 60/60/24/7/365 accounting" really mean? Think C2C2C. Think B2C. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We will raise our capacity to incentivize without lessening our capability to monetize. At Smoel, we have come to know how to upgrade dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and PHP. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and SVG. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We usually strategize six-sigma content. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! We think we know that if you harness globally then you may also empower dynamically. What does it really mean to transform "vertically"? The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not e-business. The process management factor is visionary. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Java and VOIP.