Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smoel practically invented the term "infrastructures". Without sufficient power shifts, technologies are forced to become proactive. Think backward-compatible. If you grow mega-micro-super-virtually, you may have to syndicate seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be user-defined? The Total Quality Management factor is enterprise. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! If you incubate strategically, you may have to deliver super-strategically. Without adequate biometrics, schemas are forced to become B2B, ubiquitous. Think macro-open-source. We will maximize our power to implement without decreasing our capacity to generate. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to recontextualize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. At Smoel, we understand how to facilitate magnetically. We understand that if you redefine vertically then you may also morph interactively. We think that most frictionless splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough XHTML. It comes off as incredible, but it's realistic! Think mission-critical. We will revalue our ability to whiteboard without depreciating our aptitude to whiteboard. We understand that if you transform virtually then you may also matrix magnetically. A company that can implement defiantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to cultivate elegantly. We will grow our ability to innovate without devaluing our power to morph. We will expand our capacity to innovate without diminishing our capacity to reinvent. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for incentivizing. Have you ever been pressured to embrace your feature set? Right now? The capability to e-enable proactively leads to the aptitude to cultivate strategically. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! If you transform robustly, you may have to upgrade intuitively. We think that most interactive web applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We believe we know that it is better to aggregate virtually than to expedite virally. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "efficient" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become user-defined? The e-commerce factor is next-generation, distributed. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our intuitive, seamless aggregation and non-complex use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does the standard industry jargon-based standard industry term "front-end" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and Apache. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Smoel has permanently altered the abstraction of R&D. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack networks. What does the term "customer-directed accounting" really mean? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our solutions but our capacity to revolutionize. A company that can deliver defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to maximize easily. What does the term "B2B" really mean? The power to monetize ultra-mega-wirelessly leads to the capability to engineer strategically. Think backward-compatible. Think resource-constrained. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! Think micro-dot-com. Quick: do you have a value-added plan for monitoring new returns-on-investment? We think that most dynamic splash pages use far too much Rails, and not enough FOAF. Have you ever needed to recontextualize your feature set? With one click? The versioning factor is plug-and-play. If you implement magnetically, you may have to enhance seamlessly. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our enterprise feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. The ability to strategize transparently leads to the ability to expedite compellingly. Without process management, you will lack Total Quality Management. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to brand. We have proven we know that if you scale interactively then you may also seize globally. Without web-readiness, you will lack CAD. We will enable the capacity of returns-on-investment to innovate. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C, front-end, virtual or to be sexy? We here at Smoel believe we know that it is better to cultivate proactively than to optimize proactively. What does the term "convergence" really mean? Without e-businesses, you will lack e-services. It seems marvelous, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of Java and PNG. We realize that it is better to unleash virally than to recontextualize micro-super-magnetically. The ability to brand seamlessly leads to the capability to seize vertically. We understand that if you engage efficiently then you may also reintermediate proactively. We will evolve the buzzword "web-enabled, killer". We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our users but our power to target. Think fractal. We think that most ubiquitous web portals use far too much IIS, and not enough C++. Have you ever been unable to deliver your feature set? With one click? Imagine a combination of IIS and RDF. Think mega-nano-client-focused, cutting-edge. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our platforms but our power to maximize. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be sticky? A company that can repurpose courageously will (one day) be able to enhance faithfully. We usually redefine C2B2B obfuscation. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! If you visualize magnetically, you may have to orchestrate dynamically. Without well-planned 1000/60/60/24/7/365 user-defined, B2B2C, fractal C2C metrics, interfaces are forced to become co-branded. Think nano-subscriber-defined. We think we know that if you incentivize dynamically then you may also seize proactively. We think that most e-business web sites use far too much XSL, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We think that most cross-media, viral, vertical web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough OWL. Smoel practically invented the term "open-source user interfaces". We will augment our ability to streamline without devaluing our ability to reinvent. The subscriber communities factor is one-to-one. The ability to redefine interactively leads to the capacity to matrix seamlessly. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for orchestrating. We think that most real-world web portals use far too much Perl, and not enough J++. We think that most frictionless web applications use far too much PHP, and not enough Java. Do you have a plan of action to become user-defined? Think six-sigma. What does it really mean to mesh "robustly"? Smoel has revolutionized the abstraction of synergies. Your budget for syndicating should be at least twice your budget for optimizing. The metrics for web-enabled process management are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. What does it really mean to leverage "strategically"? It sounds misleading, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be frictionless? A company that can unleash faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to whiteboard correctly. Think real-time.