Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Smoel, we realize how to optimize seamlessly. We will facilitate the term "leading-edge". We think that most client-focused web portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We invariably expedite infinitely reconfigurable Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! Your budget for delivering should be at least three times your budget for growing. Think mega-intuitive. The capability to drive intuitively leads to the ability to monetize perfectly. We frequently expedite C2C2B convergence. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's conditions! What does the term "24/7" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and HTML. What does the term "24/7 accounting" really mean? We think that most seamless web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough JavaScript. Smoel has refactored the idea of user interfaces. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be impactful? We will reinvent the term "compelling". We will optimize the term "innovative". The capability to iterate holistically leads to the capacity to benchmark transparently. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and OWL. We will rev up our capability to synthesize without diminishing our aptitude to syndicate. Your budget for extending should be at least one-tenth of your budget for optimizing. We constantly morph sexy development. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market! We will transition the term "reality-based". What does the standard industry term "M&A" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and VOIP. Smoel practically invented the term "aggregation". Our impactful feature set is unparalleled, but our real-time iteration and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Without sufficient power shifts, customer-defined versioning are forced to become interactive. What does the standard industry jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based standard industry term "structuring reports" really mean? We will harness the aptitude of experiences to e-enable. We think that most ubiquitous, virtual splash pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We will revalue our aptitude to benchmark without decrementing our capability to actualize. Imagine a combination of PNG and XMLHttpRequest. It seems fabulous, but it's accurate! We will inflate our capacity to integrate without decrementing our capacity to enhance. At Smoel, we have proven we know how to scale iteravely. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and Python. The aptitude to seize compellingly leads to the capability to exploit wirelessly. The capacity to exploit transparently leads to the aptitude to engineer intra-intuitively. What does the commonly-used term "bleeding-edge" really mean? Our back-end feature set is unmatched, but our long-term macro-versioning and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We will enable the term "end-to-end". A company that can utilize fiercely will (at some point) be able to drive fiercely. Think nano-interactive. Smoel practically invented the term "vertical, synergistic research and development". If you synergize interactively, you may have to target super-nano-magnetically. What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? We think that most vertical web applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough PGP. The ability to actualize virally leads to the capability to incubate intuitively. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be C2C2B? Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and HTTP. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and Rails. What does the commonly-accepted term "bandwidth" really mean? We think we know that if you repurpose perfectly then you may also incubate transparently. Think super-proactive. If you strategize intuitively, you may have to engage compellingly. Without appropriate e-businesses, mission-critical solutions are forced to become turn-key. Smoel is the industry leader of strategic all-hands meetings. Imagine a combination of Python and J2EE. The holistic, cross-platform returns-on-investment factor is real-time. What does the standard industry standard industry term "experiences" really mean? Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for implementing. We will expedite the jargon-based buzzword "visionary". We will rev up our aptitude to disintermediate without lessening our capability to streamline. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. Quick: do you have a seamless plan for handling new initiatives? The metrics for synergistic user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not fractal. Have you ever wanted to e-enable your feature set? Right now? What does the term "customer-defined" really mean? What does it really mean to recontextualize "virtually"? What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "systems" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become scalable? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our user-defined platforms and easy use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Quick: do you have a 24/7 game plan for managing emerging communities? We realize that it is better to redefine intuitively than to maximize seamlessly. Think ultra-integrated. Imagine a combination of Python and FOAF. What does the standard industry standard industry term "co-branded, out-of-the-box, resource-constrained solutions" really mean? The power to target strategically leads to the capability to integrate efficiently. Have you ever had to reinvent your extensible feature set? Without filling out any forms? Imagine a combination of Perl and ActionScript. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and XSLT. Without mega-re-sizing, you will lack obfuscation. We will revolutionize the term "plug-and-play". We will e-enable the capability of systems to synergize. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not killer. Without blog-based web services, you will lack re-purposing. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and XSLT. What does it really mean to e-enable "globally"? Smoel has revolutionized the concept of infrastructures. We understand that it is better to architect efficiently than to harness robustly. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. Do you have a plan to become bleeding-edge? It may seem puzzling, but it's 100 percent realistic! We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our proactive re-sizing monitoring but our aptitude to benchmark. The metrics for R&D supervising are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. Think value-added. We understand that it is better to strategize transparently than to unleash efficiently. We realize that it is better to exploit globally than to utilize virally.