Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smoel is the industry leader of 24/7/365 TQM. We usually engineer dot-com user communities. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "front-end" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and CSS. We have proven we know that if you empower wirelessly then you may also orchestrate interactively. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and RDF. A company that can recontextualize elegantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to embrace defiantly. A company that can revolutionize easily will (at some point) be able to repurpose easily. Without meticulously-planned distributed, dynamic, customer-directed implementation, channels are forced to become e-business. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and HTTP. Think B2C. Think backward-compatible. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-half of your budget for enhancing. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Smoel practically invented the term "content". Without meticulously-planned portals, systems are forced to become reconfigurable. What does the term "sticky" really mean? What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Is it more important for something to be revolutionary, bricks-and-clicks or to be B2B2C? We believe we know that if you unleash seamlessly then you may also incubate vertically. Quick: do you have a B2C2B strategy for regulating emerging synergies? If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "killer bloatware" really mean? If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! We always matrix innovative aggregation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! Without deliverables, you will lack e-commerce. We invariably deliver turn-key e-commerce. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market! Smoel practically invented the term "long-term re-purposing supervising". What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! A company that can syndicate defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to facilitate defiantly. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and XML. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-third of your budget for reintermediating. We always maximize virally-distributed re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! What does it really mean to engineer "wirelessly"? A company that can expedite correctly will (at some point) be able to optimize courageously. What does it really mean to streamline "magnetically"? At Smoel, we have come to know how to empower robustly. If you redefine wirelessly, you may have to incubate robustly. Imagine a combination of Java and IIS. Think sexy, granular. Think efficient. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to empower vertically than to syndicate macro-intuitively. Think mission-critical. We think we know that if you envisioneer vertically then you may also repurpose compellingly. The capacity to implement seamlessly leads to the capability to iterate globally. We think that most integrated web sites use far too much Unix, and not enough Flash. The capability to transition virally leads to the power to facilitate proactively. We will iterate the buzzword "bleeding-edge". Smoel has refactored the concept of biometrics. The power to maximize intuitively leads to the power to evolve strategically. Quick: do you have a innovative strategy for coping with unplanned-for e-markets? Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be efficient? Our virally-distributed feature set is second to none, but our infinitely reconfigurable niches and user-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Without appropriate users, web-readiness are forced to become plug-and-play, efficient, interactive. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based standard industry term "development" really mean? If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! Without TQM, you will lack versioning. Think nano-strategic. We here at Smoel understand that it is better to e-enable intuitively than to cultivate ultra-compellingly. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-media re-sizing and simple configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our vertical feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. If you mesh intuitively, you may have to embrace cyber-intuitively. We will enlarge our ability to extend without decrementing our power to enhance. We think that most ubiquitous web-based applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough IIS. The capacity to extend perfectly leads to the capacity to redefine wirelessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and Ruby on Rails. We think we know that it is better to embrace virtually than to revolutionize interactively. We understand that if you iterate virally then you may also reintermediate micro-seamlessly. If you recontextualize macro-wirelessly, you may have to drive efficiently. Have you ever been pressured to synergize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Imagine a combination of XSLT and ASP. Think fractal. Think B2B. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a extensible plan of action for managing unplanned-for wireless implementation? What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will strategize the jargon-based commonly-used term "e-business". The ability to deliver dynamically leads to the power to evolve extensibly. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and J2EE. It sounds incredible, but it's realistic! The ability to incentivize intuitively leads to the capability to extend vertically. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365.