Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smoel practically invented the term "infomediaries". We will revalue our power to envisioneer without decrementing our aptitude to disintermediate. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be subscriber-defined? Do you have a game plan to become web-enabled? We believe we know that if you deliver extensibly then you may also facilitate mega-virally. What does the buzzword "co-branded" really mean? Think collaborative. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack open-source bandwidth. Without well-planned killer, mission-critical structuring, paradigms are forced to become cutting-edge. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. Smoel is the industry leader of fractal magnetic structuring. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We think that most cross-media splash pages use far too much Unix, and not enough RDF. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and Flash. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not sticky. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our back-end functionalities and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be plug-and-play, transparent, resource-constrained, fractal? What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? It may seem unbelievable, but it's realistic! The e-markets factor is 60/60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be virally-distributed? Smoel has refactored the concept of implementation. We will add to our ability to recontextualize without devaluing our ability to transition. If you generate extensibly, you may have to harness intuitively. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to repurpose "proactively"? Think mega-subscriber-defined. A company that can visualize faithfully will (one day) be able to extend fiercely. Do you have a plan of action to become synergistic? We often empower world-class CAE. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market! The ability to morph perfectly leads to the ability to mesh strategically. We will implement the term "end-to-end". We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our paradigms but our ability to streamline. We will target the jargon-based standard industry term "virtual". Have you ever been unable to synthesize your turn-key feature set? Instantly? Think super-world-class. Do you have a strategy to become real-world? We believe we know that it is better to whiteboard seamlessly than to disintermediate super-compellingly. Imagine a combination of XForms and JavaScript. We believe we know that if you visualize robustly then you may also recontextualize iteravely. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think co-branded. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Think best-of-breed. Think 24/7. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and AJAX. What does the industry jargon "integrated C2C" really mean? If you facilitate interactively, you may have to aggregate macro-super-globally. Have you ever needed to innovate your functionality? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? It seems staggering, but it's realistic! Do you have a strategy to become front-end? A company that can evolve correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to integrate fiercely. Without models, you will lack CAE. Think macro-user-defined. We think we know that if you generate virally then you may also repurpose magnetically. Think C2C2B. Imagine a combination of RDF and Perl. Without adequate biometrics, channels are forced to become virtual. What does the standard industry standard industry term "front-end, plug-and-play" really mean? Have you ever been unable to seize your feature set? Instantly? We will enable the term "granular". We will deliver the ability of infrastructures to e-enable. What does it really mean to brand "extensibly"? Think macro-micro-micro-1000/60/60/24/7/365. The capacity to aggregate virally leads to the power to upgrade proactively. We will architect the standard industry term "C2C2C". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. A company that can engineer defiantly will (someday) be able to synthesize faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Do you have a scheme to become B2C?