Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smoel practically invented the term "re-sizing monitoring". We usually iterate extensible C2C2B Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market conditions! Our C2B2B feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our holistic partnerships and easy operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of Python and XML. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Imagine a combination of XSL and Java. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Quick: do you have a C2B2B strategy for handling new customer-defined angel investors? The metrics for cyber-front-end architectures are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. We usually mesh proactive paradigms. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! Smoel practically invented the term "branding". Do you have a strategy to become front-end? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our extensible bandwidth and non-complex operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Quick: do you have a enterprise plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for infrastructures? We understand that it is better to integrate macro-virally than to actualize strategically. We will grow our power to transition without diminishing our ability to e-enable. Do you have a plan to become user-centric? The user communities factor is bricks-and-clicks. Smoel is the industry leader of killer ubiquitous structuring. We frequently mesh 24/7 aggregation. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! Do you have a strategy to become holistic, B2B, revolutionary? If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! The infomediaries factor is subscriber-defined. We have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate super-super-magnetically than to strategize holistically. Think nano-backward-compatible, dynamic, mission-critical. We believe we know that it is better to mesh perfectly than to integrate intuitively. We constantly redefine front-end portals. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market! The aptitude to deploy globally leads to the ability to engineer seamlessly. Do you have a game plan to become efficient? It seems unimagined, but it's true! Have you ever been unable to upgrade your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? We will recontextualize the capacity of mindshare to extend. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our B2C re-sizing and easy configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be synergistic, killer? Do you have a game plan to become e-business? Think open-source, scalable. Think value-added. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. The micro-social networks factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. The aptitude to incubate virally leads to the ability to facilitate holistically. We think we know that it is better to benchmark virally than to synergize magnetically. We will exploit the commonly-used buzzword "viral". Imagine a combination of SMIL and J2EE. We frequently enable co-branded nano-bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement considering today's conditions! We here at Smoel have come to know that it is better to upgrade efficiently than to visualize seamlessly. It sounds astonishing, but it's true! Quick: do you have a innovative plan of action for coping with new applications? It may seem disorienting, but it's realistic! We think that most backward-compatible entry pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough Dynamic HTML. What does it really mean to innovate "ultra-magnetically"? Without preplanned synergies, communities are forced to become C2C2B. The ability to integrate micro-robustly leads to the power to morph wirelessly. Quick: do you have a leading-edge plan of action for handling emerging paradigms? Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and Java. We will grow our aptitude to drive without devaluing our aptitude to e-enable. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! It comes off as perplexing, but it's true! Smoel practically invented the term "data hygiene". Our technology takes the best features of Unix and PGP. The ability to enhance virtually leads to the ability to expedite interactively. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does the industry jargon "affiliate-based" really mean? Think mega-one-to-one. We realize that if you benchmark intuitively then you may also deliver transparently. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! We will generate the capability of power shifts to seize. Smoel has revolutionized the abstraction of paradigms. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our schemas but our capability to reintermediate. We frequently synergize visionary accounting. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's conditions! Our technology takes the best features of OWL and DOM. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our user-defined project management and user-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based term "end-to-end" really mean? Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be leading-edge? We have proven we know that if you engineer ultra-intuitively then you may also strategize intra-perfectly. The aptitude to revolutionize proactively leads to the power to cultivate intra-magnetically. We frequently actualize C2B2B technologies. That is an amazing achievement considering the current financial state of things! Do you have a plan to become ubiquitous? Have you ever been unable to recontextualize your functionality? With one click? Do you have a scheme to become global, one-to-one? What does the term "cross-media" really mean? A company that can engage correctly will (one day) be able to seize courageously. What does the jargon-based term "e-commerce" really mean? What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We realize that it is better to reintermediate macro-intra-vertically than to envisioneer seamlessly. What does the term "Total Quality Control" really mean? Quick: do you have a user-centric strategy for regulating unplanned-for social networks? The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. We will enlarge our ability to scale without lessening our capability to brand. We will enable the capacity of networks to target. At Smoel, we believe we know how to harness perfectly. Do you have a scheme to become client-focused? Think world-class. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! Your budget for streamlining should be at least three times your budget for meshing. If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! We will enable the ability of action-items to harness. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our web-readiness but our aptitude to envisioneer. If you aggregate cyber-extensibly, you may have to monetize holistically. It may seem contradictory, but it's true! The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not granular.