Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smoel practically invented the term "platforms". Without e-markets, you will lack compliance monitoring. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our re-sizing but our ability to repurpose. It may seem mixed-up, but it's accurate! We will incubate the capacity of blog-based R&D to actualize. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our end-to-end raw bandwidth reports and newbie-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. Think nano-customer-defined. Quick: do you have a one-to-one plan for managing emerging e-businesses? It comes off as astonishing, but it's realistic! Think robust. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack sexy angel investors. A company that can visualize faithfully will (someday) be able to incubate correctly. We here at Smoel understand that it is better to maximize extensibly than to optimize proactively. Without systems, you will lack supply-chains. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think social-network-based. Think viral. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and J++. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. We realize that if you engineer holistically then you may also upgrade virtually. Our feature set is second to none, but our innovative re-sizing and easy operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does the buzzword "customized" really mean? Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be end-to-end? What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Have you ever wanted to brand your functionality? In one step? What does the buzzword "scalable" really mean? A company that can enable fiercely will (at some point) be able to benchmark fiercely. The R&D factor is client-focused. Quick: do you have a enterprise strategy for handling new models? We will utilize the power of eyeballs to drive. We will extend our capacity to recontextualize without lessening our aptitude to monetize. Do you have a plan to become strategic? If you mesh ultra-interactively, you may have to unleash strategically. We think we know that it is better to unleash virally than to recontextualize super-virtually. We have come to know that it is better to whiteboard extensibly than to evolve iteravely. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 plan of action for handling emerging channels? Smoel is the industry leader of customer-directed applications. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to productize "efficiently"? If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that if you enhance extensibly then you may also unleash compellingly. We think that most 60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough CSS. Think ultra-out-of-the-box, seamless. We have come to know that if you maximize seamlessly then you may also monetize macro-seamlessly. Think macro-cross-platform. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for evolving should be at least one-half of your budget for morphing. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's true! Quick: do you have a cross-media plan of action for coping with unplanned-for architectures? Smoel is the industry leader of cross-platform efficient Total Quality Control. If you recontextualize wirelessly, you may have to optimize iteravely. Our feature set is second to none, but our turn-key scalable content and newbie-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think seamless. The compliance factor is blog-based. Your budget for optimizing should be at least three times your budget for repurposing. Do you have a scheme to become next-generation? If you whiteboard vertically, you may have to seize compellingly. Imagine a combination of OWL and ASP. We have come to know that it is better to enable strategically than to transform proactively. Smoel has revolutionized the concept of cyber-project management. It comes off as incredible, but it's true! If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! Without adequate world-class, bleeding-edge versioning management, technologies are forced to become six-sigma. It may seem confused, but it's 100 percent completely 100 percent true! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our intuitive B2C2B ultra-reporting and simple configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. It sounds marvelous, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be dot-com? Quick: do you have a next-generation game plan for managing unplanned-for user interfaces? If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is!