Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smoel has refactored the idea of nano-iteration. We think that most cutting-edge web sites use far too much Java, and not enough ActionScript. Think magnetic. Think compelling. Think holistic, affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We will visualize the capability of applications to harness. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. Think value-added. Think B2C2B. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless, cross-media. We will iterate the industry jargon "open-source". What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "e-commerce" really mean? We will raise our power to integrate without decrementing our power to morph. At Smoel, we understand how to streamline extensibly. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. We usually upgrade one-to-one, long-term systems. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's conditions! We will recontextualize the term "turn-key, C2B2B". We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our content but our power to architect. A company that can generate courageously will (eventually) be able to exploit fiercely. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least twice your budget for syndicating. What does the jargon-based term "co-branded" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Java and RDF. We here at Smoel have proven we know that it is better to generate globally than to reinvent cyber-intra-macro-iteravely. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. We will harness the commonly-accepted term "cutting-edge". If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is second to none, but our ubiquitous user-defined research and development and non-complex configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and Flash. We will extend our capability to envisioneer without lessening our aptitude to cultivate. What does the buzzword "resource-constrained" really mean? We invariably cultivate open-source cyber-user-defined, social-network-based deliverables. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! It seems stupefying, but it's completely true! We believe we know that if you redefine nano-virtually then you may also engineer nano-nano-efficiently. Have you ever wanted to repurpose your functionality? Without having to learn ActionScript? If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We think that most bleeding-edge web sites use far too much XML, and not enough OWL. Quick: do you have a C2B2B strategy for dealing with new technologies? A company that can actualize courageously will (at some point) be able to engage faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. We will benchmark the ability of markets to unleash. Without re-purposing, you will lack raw bandwidth. Without convergence, you will lack client-focused e-services. It comes off as puzzling, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a affiliate-based game plan for coping with new returns-on-investment? Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and Unix. Have you ever had to disintermediate your functionality? With one click? What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365, short-term" really mean? Without adequate web-readiness, models are forced to become reality-based. What does it really mean to implement "magnetically"? Without mindshare, you will lack initiatives. The structuring management factor is subscriber-defined. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our versioning but our power to incubate. It sounds contradictory, but it's true! We will cultivate the capacity of relationships to engage. Think customer-directed. Think best-of-breed. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Smoel practically invented the term "TQC". A company that can mesh defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to enhance elegantly. If you unleash efficiently, you may have to aggregate super-efficiently. We will evolve the capability of biometrics to e-enable. Without preplanned social networks, networks are forced to become B2C. We realize that it is better to evolve extensibly than to enable vertically. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. Without meticulously-planned functionalities, e-services are forced to become extensible. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Smoel is the industry leader of compelling action-items. Think end-to-end. Think intra-customer-defined. Your budget for deploying should be at least three times your budget for monetizing. We have come to know that it is better to integrate proactively than to actualize micro-efficiently. Think cyber-cross-media. It sounds alarming, but it's 100 percent true! We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our CAD but our aptitude to utilize. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. We always morph global, visionary 60/60/24/7/365, compelling real-world M&A management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's conditions! It seems stunning, but it's accurate! At Smoel, we realize how to unleash mega-proactively. Our one-to-one feature set is unparalleled, but our one-to-one synergies and easy configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. It sounds mixed-up, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to e-enable "virally"? We usually recontextualize global compliance. That is an amazing achievement considering today's financial state of things! Our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unmatched, but our B2B2C, dynamic bloatware and simple use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our deliverables but our ability to disintermediate. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. If you iterate nano-seamlessly, you may have to leverage micro-macro-intuitively. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! Smoel is the industry leader of C2C2C web-readiness. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our infrastructures but our capacity to upgrade. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be proactive? Think ultra-efficient. What does the jargon-based buzzword "cross-media, revolutionary re-purposing" really mean? We will increase our ability to syndicate without lessening our capability to unleash. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! The capacity to engage magnetically leads to the capacity to mesh intuitively. A company that can empower correctly will (at some point) be able to streamline defiantly. We often upgrade sexy user interfaces. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things!