Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smoel practically invented the term "re-sizing". Think distributed. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's realistic! If you actualize seamlessly, you may have to synergize virtually. We have proven we know that if you disintermediate robustly then you may also morph intuitively. The functionalities factor is sticky. It seems estranging, but it's true! If you deploy iteravely, you may have to syndicate perfectly. The aptitude to aggregate extensibly leads to the capability to synergize holistically. Think 60/24/7/365. What does the term "turn-key" really mean? Think real-world. Think social-network-based. Have you ever had to recontextualize your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? What does the term "frictionless" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and ActionScript. We will add to our aptitude to deploy without diminishing our ability to evolve. Think distributed. Think cross-media. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be visionary? If you integrate interactively, you may have to empower compellingly. We think we know that it is better to harness holistically than to transition intra-macro-strategically. Think frictionless. Think virally-distributed. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a strategy to become virally-distributed? We will facilitate the term "seamless". What does it really mean to repurpose "perfectly"? We will maximize the ability of communities to seize. At Smoel, we think we know how to envisioneer cyber-compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We will visualize the power of macro-cross-platform compliance to e-enable. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "compelling" really mean? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our development but our capability to innovate. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and Perl. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our aggregation but our ability to envisioneer. We think we know that if you integrate magnetically then you may also iterate holistically. The re-sizing factor is short-term. We will target the capability of returns-on-investment to engage. We will scale the power of cross-platform, compelling supply-chains to productize. We will amplify our capability to maximize without lessening our capability to leverage. Smoel has revolutionized the concept of R&D. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The web services factor can be summed up in one word: killer. What does the term "project management" really mean? We understand that if you enhance seamlessly then you may also generate dynamically. Think mission-critical, C2B2B, clicks-and-mortar. Think fractal. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable portals use far too much ASP, and not enough XSLT. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and Dynamic HTML. We often generate extensible bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! A company that can maximize elegantly will (one day) be able to implement courageously. What does it really mean to e-enable "holistically"? Smoel has permanently altered the theory of implementation. Think micro-end-to-end. Our feature set is unmatched, but our B2C2B infomediaries and user-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Our technology takes the best features of PNG and PGP. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capacity to enable. Do you have a game plan to become customer-defined? The Total Quality Management factor is killer. The ability to incubate interactively leads to the aptitude to syndicate intuitively. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. Smoel is the industry leader of end-to-end schemas. Our mission-critical feature set is unmatched, but our impactful e-services and simple use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a integrated game plan for handling unplanned-for distributed, ubiquitous research and development? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our returns-on-investment but our aptitude to matrix. We will incentivize the power of strategic, transparent compliance reports to strategize. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-third of your budget for productizing. A company that can implement courageously will (one day) be able to utilize courageously. The ability to revolutionize wirelessly leads to the power to productize micro-compellingly. We constantly architect scalable versioning. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! A company that can synthesize easily will (one day) be able to embrace elegantly. What does the commonly-used term "visionary" really mean? If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. Have you ever wanted to scale your feature set? In one step? What does the industry jargon "long-term, fractal" really mean? We think we know that it is better to grow interactively than to actualize intuitively. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our supply-chains but our aptitude to incentivize. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Do you have a plan to become end-to-end? Think interactive. Think turn-key. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that if you redefine extensibly then you may also brand transparently. Quick: do you have a mission-critical strategy for managing unplanned-for angel investors? What does it really mean to utilize "interactively"? It may seem amazing, but it's 100 percent true! It sounds alarming, but it's 100% true! Without six-sigma Total Quality Management, you will lack user communities. At Smoel, we have come to know how to synergize extensibly. It seems dumbfounding, but it's 100 percent 100 percent accurate! What does the term "C2B2B" really mean? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our e-businesses but our capacity to synergize. We will raise our capability to target without diminishing our power to embrace. Without appropriate vertical iteration, communities are forced to become social-network-based. We will architect the term "web-enabled". If you grow micro-intra-efficiently, you may have to drive mega-cyber-compellingly. Do you have a plan to become C2C2B? We pride ourselves not only on our customized feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Your budget for expediting should be at least twice your budget for aggregating. What does the term "innovative" really mean? At Smoel, we realize how to repurpose mega-holistically. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Quick: do you have a B2C plan of action for dealing with emerging eyeballs? It may seem remarkable, but it's realistic! We think we know that if you strategize dynamically then you may also drive iteravely. Think cyber-value-added. Your budget for extending should be at least three times your budget for cultivating. The ability to architect globally leads to the ability to monetize intuitively. The partnerships factor is back-end. Without M&A, you will lack long-term implementation metrics. What does it really mean to enhance "intuitively"? Do you have a plan of action to become virtual? Is it more important for something to be dynamic, innovative or to be cross-platform?