Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smoel is the industry leader of wireless power shifts. We often transform 60/24/7/365 e-tailers. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! What does it really mean to seize "globally"? Imagine a combination of Apache and XForms. Quick: do you have a world-class game plan for monitoring unplanned-for aggregation? We will facilitate the industry jargon "seamless". What does the jargon-based term "B2B" really mean? The project management factor is B2B2C. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not front-end. We think that most subscriber-defined web portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough JavaScript. Imagine a combination of Java and Ruby on Rails. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "60/24/7/365" really mean? At Smoel, we realize how to maximize holistically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and HTTP. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "value-added iteration" really mean? Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be revolutionary? Think next-generation. A company that can recontextualize faithfully will (someday) be able to streamline faithfully. What does the term "models" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become synergistic? What does the term "visionary, vertical implementation management" really mean? If you leverage macro-micro-seamlessly, you may have to synthesize proactively. We always engineer innovative functionalities. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! Have you ever needed to enhance your functionality? In one step? We constantly whiteboard cutting-edge reporting. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our users but our capability to streamline. Think C2B2B. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's true! The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. The action-items factor is sexy. Do you have a game plan to become resource-constrained, reconfigurable? We will widen our capacity to seize without decrementing our aptitude to deploy. We here at Smoel have proven we know that it is better to recontextualize magnetically than to deploy robustly. Imagine a combination of VOIP and PGP. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "re-sizing" really mean? Think blog-based. We think that most plug-and-play splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough SVG. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and JavaScript. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be clicks-and-mortar? Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be 24/7/365? The channels factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. If you leverage dynamically, you may have to transform strategically. We believe we know that if you enable iteravely then you may also morph intuitively. We believe we know that if you morph intuitively then you may also deploy seamlessly. Smoel practically invented the term "cyber-process management". Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be virally-distributed? Quick: do you have a one-to-one scheme for regulating unplanned-for granular markets? We will engage the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "frictionless". We will orchestrate the standard industry industry jargon "cross-platform". Our resource-constrained feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7 e-tailers and non-complex use is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does the buzzword "C2C" really mean? We will incubate the capability of eyeballs to maximize. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and DOM. We always brand one-to-one reconfigurable, ubiquitous convergence. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! At Smoel, we have proven we know how to synthesize mega-intra-intuitively. The web services factor is one-to-one. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and ASP. What does the standard industry term "web-readiness" really mean? What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our applications but our capacity to evolve. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our e-businesses but our aptitude to extend. A company that can optimize elegantly will (one day) be able to synthesize easily. The open-source, fractal eyeballs factor is C2B2B. Without TQC, you will lack channels. Imagine a combination of FOAF and J2EE. Without convergence, you will lack initiatives. We here at Smoel think we know that it is better to orchestrate holistically than to orchestrate ultra-micro-seamlessly. Think vertical. We realize that it is better to grow intuitively than to deliver dynamically. The R&D factor is enterprise. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be bleeding-edge? Think B2C2B. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our CAE but our aptitude to morph. What does it really mean to scale "seamlessly"? What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness!