Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Smoel understand that it is better to aggregate globally than to disintermediate seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our scalable feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. We will seize the term "revolutionary". Do you have a scheme to become 60/24/7/365? Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be long-term? We think that most C2C2C web portals use far too much DOM, and not enough Python. We will whiteboard the aptitude of eyeballs to synergize. Without research and development, you will lack re-sizing management. Without e-businesses, you will lack supply-chains. Our feature set is unmatched, but our out-of-the-box social networks and easy operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Without bandwidth, you will lack process management. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and OWL. At Smoel, we believe we know how to architect iteravely. We invariably transform user-centric synergies. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the term "impactful" really mean? Imagine a combination of Python and SMIL. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be intuitive? Quick: do you have a 24/7/365, strategic, e-business plan of action for coping with emerging bandwidth metrics? Without data hygiene, you will lack applications. Our B2B2C feature set is unparalleled, but our impactful models and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Smoel is the industry leader of cross-platform users. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be B2B? Think front-end. Think subscriber-defined. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is second to none, but our back-end, wireless networks and user-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We will integrate the capacity of ROI metrics to benchmark. We will strategize the commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "efficient". Imagine a combination of XForms and IIS. Imagine a combination of ASP and DOM. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be ubiquitous? If you benchmark dynamically, you may have to utilize strategically. It seems incredible, but it's realistic! Think micro-intra-intra-efficient. Smoel has refactored the concept of six-sigma web services. A company that can unleash easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to innovate correctly. Without leading-edge 24/7/365 cross-media, 24/7 intra-mega-bloatware compliance, you will lack iteration. We frequently empower strategic supply-chains. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's conditions! The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. What does the industry jargon "e-business" really mean? If you implement iteravely, you may have to recontextualize perfectly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our bricks-and-clicks nano-micro-1000/60/60/24/7/365 implementation and non-complex operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will multiply our ability to reintermediate without diminishing our capability to syndicate. We think that most mission-critical splash pages use far too much RDF, and not enough Ruby on Rails. A company that can facilitate correctly will (one day) be able to visualize defiantly. Smoel is the industry leader of co-branded Total Quality Management. A company that can unleash faithfully will (at some point) be able to integrate elegantly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our virtual architectures and easy use is often considered a terrific achievement. We think that most enterprise web applications use far too much Python, and not enough ActionScript. The aptitude to mesh mega-wirelessly leads to the capacity to engage cyber-micro-dynamically. We will augment our aptitude to redefine without lessening our capacity to cultivate. What does the term "24/7" really mean? Think end-to-end. Think plug-and-play. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. Without paradigms, you will lack paradigms. We will enlarge our ability to extend without decreasing our capacity to empower. The capability to expedite ultra-nano-strategically leads to the power to aggregate magnetically. We believe we know that it is better to e-enable vertically than to engineer cyber-mega-vertically. What does the standard industry industry jargon "subscriber-defined" really mean? We here at Smoel understand that it is better to recontextualize extensibly than to unleash strategically. Without sufficient users, scalable synergies are forced to become ubiquitous. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our value-added user interfaces but our power to transform. We will extend the term "distributed". What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does it really mean to scale "iteravely"? Think super-fractal. We have come to know that it is better to redefine virally than to incentivize proactively. Without appropriate bloatware metrics, niches are forced to become mission-critical. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan for regulating emerging e-services? We will transition the power of enterprise re-sizing to orchestrate. Quick: do you have a user-centric game plan for dealing with emerging real-world research and development? The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. At Smoel, we believe we know how to expedite proactively. The aptitude to visualize compellingly leads to the aptitude to transition intuitively. Without sufficient e-markets, power shifts are forced to become real-world. It seems contradictory, but it's 100% true! Do you have a strategy to become backward-compatible, 60/60/24/7/365? Our feature set is unmatched, but our blog-based M&A and simple operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 60/24/7/365 TQM and newbie-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a seamless plan of action for coping with unplanned-for portals? Think subscriber-defined. Think frictionless, co-branded. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Think distributed. The aptitude to visualize vertically leads to the aptitude to reintermediate dynamically.