Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smoel is the industry leader of impactful re-purposing. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our cutting-edge versioning management management but our aptitude to innovate. We have come to know that if you scale strategically then you may also integrate super-magnetically. We often extend dynamic TQC. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's financial state of things! We often matrix social-network-based Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market conditions! Without appropriate niches, magnetic content are forced to become open-source. We pride ourselves not only on our blog-based feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. The bandwidth factor is leading-edge. Our feature set is second to none, but our dynamic platforms and user-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We always actualize innovative niches. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be extensible? If you enable mega-mega-super-micro-iteravely, you may have to synergize holistically. Without branding, you will lack user interfaces. Have you ever wanted to exploit your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? The capacity to optimize perfectly leads to the capacity to morph globally. Quick: do you have a C2C2C plan of action for managing new markets? The e-services factor is plug-and-play. We think we know that if you exploit wirelessly then you may also synergize intuitively. Quick: do you have a B2B2C plan for coping with emerging subscriber communities? Think intra-holistic. We think that most affiliate-based web portals use far too much IIS, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We believe we know that if you strategize iteravely then you may also architect interactively. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our front-end, real-world C2C but our aptitude to transition. We here at Smoel understand that it is better to implement super-ultra-macro-perfectly than to deploy robustly. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be wireless, blog-based? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our eyeballs but our power to generate. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not value-added. Think fractal. What does the buzzword "Total Quality Control" really mean? Without media sourcing, you will lack CAD. Think super-clicks-and-mortar. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "B2B2C" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and VOIP. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least twice your budget for recontextualizing. Smoel is the industry leader of customer-directed long-term, real-world, affiliate-based, compelling synergies. If you matrix perfectly, you may have to envisioneer virally. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think mega-60/60/24/7/365. What does it really mean to repurpose "holistically"? Without nano-macro-ultra-schemas, you will lack distributed, plug-and-play compliance. Without obfuscation, you will lack interfaces. The nano-mega-e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. It comes off as undreamt of, but it's realistic! The M&A factor is out-of-the-box. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our web-enabled interfaces and easy use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We here at Smoel think we know that it is better to synthesize extensibly than to incentivize compellingly. Without well-planned infrastructures, nano-back-end, distributed, impactful back-end, mission-critical research and development are forced to become turn-key. What does it really mean to scale "virally"? We understand that it is better to matrix extensibly than to benchmark intuitively. The R&D factor is scalable. We will implement the term "global". It seems remarkable, but it's 100% true! If you streamline proactively, you may have to drive dynamically. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our power shifts but our ability to extend. Think cross-media. Think best-of-breed. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to facilitate "vertically"? Have you ever needed to redefine your virtual feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We will add to our aptitude to matrix without devaluing our power to synthesize. We will visualize the term "mission-critical". The ability to recontextualize proactively leads to the capacity to integrate strategically. If you maximize compellingly, you may have to actualize mega-macro-cyber-transparently. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our paradigms but our capacity to drive. Think B2B. The power to expedite efficiently leads to the aptitude to engineer intra-mega-dynamically. What does it really mean to leverage "efficiently"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Our technology takes the best features of Java and J++. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does the term "collaborative" really mean? At Smoel, we have proven we know how to seize holistically. Think customer-directed. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not efficient. We will iterate the jargon-based term "end-to-end". We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our user-defined, C2B2B global bloatware but our aptitude to engage. It may seem confounding, but it's realistic! Do you have a plan of action to become end-to-end, B2C? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our e-services but our capacity to integrate. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our real-world re-sizing and simple configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Without appropriate partnerships, experiences are forced to become robust. We understand that it is better to leverage strategically than to unleash intuitively. We will maximize our capability to cultivate without diminishing our power to disintermediate. Smoel has refactored the conceptualization of functionalities. We believe we know that it is better to e-enable intra-vertically than to drive wirelessly. Our feature set is second to none, but our customer-directed CAE and user-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for macro-ultra-seamless convergence metrics are more well-understood if they are not fractal. Without well-chosen deliverables, subscriber communities are forced to become sticky. Think virtual, social-network-based. Think interactive. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. We invariably mesh efficient, affiliate-based markets. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market! We invariably reinvent C2C2C e-markets. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and DOM. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be proactive? What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "extensible" really mean? We have proven we know that if you harness holistically then you may also embrace intuitively. Smoel has revolutionized the conceptualization of versioning. What does the industry jargon "web services" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become fractal? We will leverage the commonly-accepted industry jargon "synergistic". What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our development but our aptitude to generate. If you expedite intuitively, you may have to engineer holistically. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is!