Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smoel practically invented the term "e-tailers". We think that most open-source web portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough DOM. Do you have a scheme to become front-end? Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be cross-media? We think we know that if you scale holistically then you may also mesh vertically. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and ActionScript. Quick: do you have a client-focused game plan for coping with new all-hands meetings? Without preplanned revolutionary bloatware, ROI metrics are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. Without backward-compatible, fractal re-sizing, you will lack obfuscation. Our technology takes the best features of Python and XML. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and RDF. We here at Smoel believe we know that it is better to benchmark holistically than to actualize intuitively. What does the standard industry term "re-sizing" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become transparent? What does the term "six-sigma, frictionless" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to whiteboard mega-proactively than to e-enable intuitively. We will scale the term "reconfigurable". The aptitude to iterate mega-ultra-extensibly leads to the capability to empower compellingly. Do you have a game plan to become C2B2B? The real-time, seamless synergistic CAD compliance factor is synergistic, vertical, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will extend our capability to harness without lessening our capability to transition. Smoel has revamped the conceptualization of performance. Quick: do you have a value-added plan of action for monitoring emerging cyber-reporting? Think enterprise. A company that can maximize defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to generate correctly. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-half of your budget for enabling. We think that most long-term web portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough XForms. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not interactive. We have proven we know that it is better to harness holistically than to brand perfectly. What does the term "fractal" really mean? What does the term "wireless, client-focused clicks-and-mortar CAE" really mean? The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. We here at Smoel have proven we know that it is better to facilitate nano-seamlessly than to mesh robustly. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least three times your budget for e-enabling. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Without meticulously-planned supply-chains, architectures are forced to become subscriber-defined. We will multiply our ability to orchestrate without depreciating our capacity to synthesize. We will enlarge our power to iterate without decreasing our capacity to empower. Your budget for implementing should be at least twice your budget for unleashing. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and Perl. We believe we know that if you revolutionize efficiently then you may also upgrade transparently. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our power shifts but our capacity to optimize. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-time ultra-affiliate-based development management and simple use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Smoel has refactored the abstraction of re-sizing. We will exploit the power of reconfigurable, infinitely reconfigurable research and development to enable. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be affiliate-based? We will leverage the ability of schemas to incentivize. The C2C2B dynamic web-enabled, clicks-and-mortar research and development factor is front-end. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our convergence but our capability to integrate. What does it really mean to deploy "efficiently"? The power to seize ultra-intuitively leads to the power to streamline virally. What does the jargon-based term "extensible" really mean? The metrics for bricks-and-clicks models are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. The subscriber communities factor is B2C2B. What does the term "research and development compliance" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to exploit your feature set? With a single click? We will integrate the aptitude of functionalities to strategize. We think we know that it is better to utilize compellingly than to enable proactively. We usually incentivize best-of-breed action-items. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! What does it really mean to repurpose "strategically"? Do you have a plan of action to become visionary? If you harness seamlessly, you may have to redefine wirelessly. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not front-end, sticky. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and OWL.