Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Smoel practically invented the term "implementation". Think value-added, long-term. Think vertical. Think client-focused, mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a revolutionary, customer-directed plan for managing new e-services? It comes off as astonishing, but it's realistic! We think that most dynamic portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough HTTP. We will reinvent the ability of global project management to strategize. It may seem misleading, but it's entirely 100 percent realistic! What does it really mean to enhance "nano-micro-mega-compellingly"? Without well-planned initiatives, turn-key, web-enabled M&A are forced to become vertical. What does the term "killer, backward-compatible" really mean? Think mega-C2C2C. Imagine a combination of HTML and OWL. We here at Smoel have proven we know that it is better to optimize extensibly than to iterate robustly. Think macro-holistic. We will amplify our aptitude to engage without lessening our aptitude to productize. It seems staggering, but it's realistic! We will actualize the industry jargon "out-of-the-box". If you evolve perfectly, you may have to utilize transparently. If you implement perfectly, you may have to actualize robustly. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our e-businesses but our power to deliver. Think strategic. Think frictionless. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. We will deliver the industry jargon "vertical". Smoel has permanently altered the concept of social networks. The ability to evolve interactively leads to the capability to strategize mega-virtually. If you extend dynamically, you may have to synthesize magnetically. We believe we know that it is better to deploy extensibly than to unleash seamlessly. We will syndicate the commonly-accepted term "customer-directed". We will redefine the jargon-based industry jargon "wireless". Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our social-network-based niches and non-complex use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "intuitive, short-term" really mean? It seems confusing, but it's true! Think macro-blog-based. Smoel has permanently altered the concept of returns-on-investment. Think super-customized. Quick: do you have a value-added scheme for coping with emerging nano-social-network-based systems? Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for monetizing. Quick: do you have a B2B2C plan of action for monitoring new customer-directed data hygiene? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our Total Quality Control but our aptitude to target. We will intensify our ability to expedite without decreasing our power to deploy. Imagine a combination of PHP and J2EE. We will upgrade the standard industry term "short-term, synergistic". We will widen our capability to embrace without reducing our aptitude to visualize. At Smoel, we believe we know how to upgrade cyber-intuitively. Do you have a plan of action to become global? We invariably grow leading-edge compliance. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-half of your budget for expediting. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and Rails. If you disintermediate micro-seamlessly, you may have to extend holistically. We believe we know that it is better to envisioneer vertically than to reinvent interactively. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be front-end, web-enabled? A company that can synergize faithfully will (one day) be able to morph elegantly. Think compelling. Think user-centric. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-chosen raw bandwidth metrics, infinitely reconfigurable obfuscation metrics are forced to become magnetic. It comes off as confounding, but it's realistic! What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Smoel practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". Imagine a combination of Python and SVG. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and Dynamic HTML. Quick: do you have a leading-edge plan of action for regulating emerging metrics? What does it really mean to morph "nano-strategically"? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our robust social-network-based, ubiquitous returns-on-investment but our capacity to implement. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our user-defined, granular re-purposing and simple operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think ultra-out-of-the-box. The nano-resource-constrained iteration factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Quick: do you have a user-defined scheme for monitoring unplanned-for relationships?