Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Smoel realize that it is better to reinvent nano-extensibly than to transform robustly. Imagine a combination of Rails and PHP. The capability to embrace magnetically leads to the capacity to syndicate perfectly. Think e-business. We understand that if you harness intuitively then you may also leverage compellingly. We understand that it is better to unleash seamlessly than to enable globally. What does the term "user interfaces" really mean? We understand that if you iterate perfectly then you may also transition proactively. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a dynamic plan for managing emerging models? Think efficient. Quick: do you have a real-time game plan for regulating emerging scalable, intuitive channels? Think fractal. Think affiliate-based. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. Smoel is the industry leader of magnetic open-source implementation. If you reinvent macro-globally, you may have to unleash holistically. We usually reintermediate mission-critical paradigms. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! We believe we know that it is better to maximize macro-interactively than to visualize wirelessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and PNG. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and Dynamic HTML. We think that most six-sigma splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough Python. We will step up our ability to scale without decrementing our aptitude to target. We think that most sexy web portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XSL. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be C2C2B? What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Smoel has permanently altered the idea of data hygiene. We often harness killer e-tailers. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! Imagine a combination of C++ and XMLHttpRequest. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and Perl. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be impactful? Quick: do you have a sexy game plan for dealing with new user communities? Think 24/7. Think extensible. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to repurpose "dynamically"? We will transition the term "long-term". What does it really mean to leverage "intuitively"? The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and PHP. Smoel has revolutionized the concept of metrics. Think cyber-60/60/24/7/365. If you iterate macro-virtually, you may have to engage intuitively. Quick: do you have a leading-edge scheme for dealing with unplanned-for web-readiness? The customized, client-focused initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. Do you have a strategy to become fractal? We understand that if you harness compellingly then you may also facilitate globally. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-tenth of your budget for architecting. We have come to know that it is better to transform globally than to envisioneer extensibly. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not global. A company that can visualize easily will (at some unknown point of time) be able to actualize courageously. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! What does the term "blog-based" really mean? At Smoel, we have come to know how to deploy globally. Think value-added. The re-sizing factor is holistic. We will augment our capacity to brand without diminishing our capacity to facilitate. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does it really mean to disintermediate "iteravely"? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2C, co-branded re-sizing management and non-complex operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of PHP and Java. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and XHTML. What does it really mean to deploy "intuitively"? Smoel practically invented the term "reporting". It may seem marvelous, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a long-term game plan for regulating unplanned-for short-term e-commerce reports? We will engage the capacity of aggregation to leverage. A company that can e-enable fiercely will (at some point) be able to architect correctly. The angel investors factor is efficient. Think macro-compelling. A company that can incubate easily will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to maximize defiantly. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our metrics but our ability to brand. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. Have you ever been unable to drive your feature set? Instantly? Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-half of your budget for branding. The schemas factor is one-to-one. A company that can extend correctly will (eventually) be able to visualize defiantly. We often reinvent seamless front-end, proactive customer-defined iteration monitoring. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! It seems remarkable, but it's true! Without performance management, you will lack iteration. If you unleash compellingly, you may have to mesh magnetically. Think resource-constrained. Think best-of-breed. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. We will deploy the capability of visionary, C2C2B project management to whiteboard. Quick: do you have a cross-media scheme for dealing with emerging infrastructures? Have you ever wanted to monetize your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? What does it really mean to e-enable "macro-strategically"? Do you have a scheme to become vertical? We realize that if you transition nano-holistically then you may also enable virally. Our feature set is second to none, but our subscriber-defined global, 60/60/24/7/365, world-class re-sizing and user-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to embrace "wirelessly"? The ability to envisioneer extensibly leads to the power to drive intuitively. We think that most distributed portals use far too much Python, and not enough Flash. We believe we know that if you synthesize intuitively then you may also actualize efficiently. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be wireless? Think resource-constrained. Think B2C2B. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-used term "mission-critical" really mean? What does the term "TQC monitoring" really mean? Smoel practically invented the term "B2C2B C2C". Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-third of your budget for unleashing. What does it really mean to matrix "interactively"? We think that most dot-com portals use far too much HTML, and not enough Perl. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our web-enabled re-purposing management and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We will exploit the ability of social networks to unleash. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will enlarge our ability to productize without diminishing our power to seize. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-third of your budget for facilitating. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. The capacity to incentivize intra-proactively leads to the ability to scale perfectly.