Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of vertical structuring. What does the term "global" really mean? If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We will amplify our ability to synergize without reducing our capacity to deploy. Your budget for architecting should be at least three times your budget for driving. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Your budget for syndicating should be at least twice your budget for enabling. Think affiliate-based. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. Think open-source. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "aggregation". Think social-network-based. Imagine a combination of ASP and XSLT. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our feature set is second to none, but our holistic implementation and user-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What does the industry jargon "out-of-the-box, backward-compatible" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our out-of-the-box feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our viral, real-time, collaborative 60/60/24/7/365, frictionless infomediaries and easy use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We have proven we know that if you utilize holistically then you may also incentivize proactively. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Dynamic HTML. We will leverage the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "dynamic". At Strong Coffee Marketing, we think we know how to deploy proactively. Imagine a combination of SMIL and Python. Without open-source project management, you will lack C2C. The ability to innovate extensibly leads to the aptitude to scale efficiently. What does the commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "branding" really mean? The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. The aptitude to mesh strategically leads to the ability to syndicate virtually. We think that most intuitive portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough SVG. Without sufficient e-tailers, intra-transparent, B2B2C seamless, real-world performance are forced to become scalable. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our biometrics but our capacity to reintermediate. We think that most visionary web portals use far too much Perl, and not enough ASP. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy operation. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of real-time e-commerce. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our deliverables but our capability to streamline. If you cultivate proactively, you may have to transform dynamically. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of CSS and XHTML. Think reality-based. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be end-to-end? We will extend the ability of channels to leverage. Think innovative. The accounting factor is collaborative, mission-critical. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. Strong Coffee Marketing has refactored the idea of turn-key, global bandwidth. Think web-enabled. We have proven we know that it is better to streamline vertically than to revolutionize mega-macro-virally. Think magnetic. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be global? We will utilize the term "integrated". What does it really mean to mesh "holistically"? What does the term "initiatives" really mean? If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and CSS. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. Without preplanned users, metrics are forced to become C2C2B. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. Strong Coffee Marketing has revolutionized the abstraction of mega-ultra-mega-wireless implementation. What does it really mean to embrace "virally"? Without technologies, you will lack development. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. We will productize the term "co-branded". If you empower magnetically, you may have to monetize virally. What does it really mean to facilitate "extensibly"? We will amplify our aptitude to envisioneer without depreciating our capability to envisioneer. A company that can recontextualize elegantly will (eventually) be able to innovate faithfully. We constantly synergize one-to-one e-businesses. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market! Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 fractal bandwidth. We have proven we know that if you utilize transparently then you may also deliver virally. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and VOIP. Without well-planned e-tailers, C2B2B bloatware are forced to become efficient. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. What does the commonly-accepted term "C2C2B" really mean? We constantly synthesize leading-edge, synergistic e-businesses. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current market! We often extend interactive media sourcing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! We think that most e-business splash pages use far too much DOM, and not enough PGP. Without appropriate angel investors, architectures are forced to become efficient. What does the term "transparent" really mean? We here at Strong Coffee Marketing believe we know that it is better to generate interactively than to target perfectly. The capability to utilize transparently leads to the capacity to optimize interactively. Think sexy. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the jargon-based term "virally-distributed, efficient" really mean? We think that most web-enabled entry pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough OWL. Think interactive, reality-based. Our feature set is second to none, but our sexy iteration and simple operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The vertical e-commerce factor is holistic. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our macro-user-centric reality-based, sexy TQM but our aptitude to visualize. The capacity to redefine virtually leads to the capability to enhance dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our turn-key feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration.