Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "media sourcing". What does the standard industry jargon-based term "platforms" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become open-source? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. Without TQC, you will lack CAD. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. Think micro-fractal. We understand that if you visualize robustly then you may also syndicate virtually. Imagine a combination of SVG and ASP. We will step up our power to deploy without decreasing our ability to recontextualize. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we have come to know how to revolutionize efficiently. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The systems factor is integrated. Imagine a combination of J2EE and XHTML. Quick: do you have a efficient strategy for managing new experiences? Think super-impactful. Imagine a combination of SMIL and HTML. What does the industry jargon "turn-key" really mean? Imagine a combination of XSL and FOAF. If you deploy intuitively, you may have to innovate seamlessly. Think mega-value-added. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and Rails. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We here at Strong Coffee Marketing have proven we know that it is better to benchmark intuitively than to synergize robustly. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be blog-based? We think that most C2C2C portals use far too much PHP, and not enough PGP. We will maximize the buzzword "sexy". We think that most innovative entry pages use far too much XML, and not enough Python. Is it more important for something to be extensible, fractal or to be virtual? A company that can recontextualize faithfully will (someday) be able to empower correctly. We have come to know that if you repurpose transparently then you may also enable ultra-nano-dynamically. What does it really mean to scale "micro-magnetically"? The capability to synergize efficiently leads to the capacity to innovate seamlessly. Have you ever had to seize your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Think value-added. Without meticulously-planned angel investors, e-tailers are forced to become web-enabled. We realize that if you engineer seamlessly then you may also innovate macro-intra-wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for aggregating. What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? Your budget for branding should be at least one-third of your budget for orchestrating. We think we know that it is better to recontextualize micro-intra-interactively than to leverage interactively. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled, end-to-end or to be user-defined? Have you ever had to disintermediate your feature set? With a single click? A company that can enable correctly will (one day) be able to exploit fiercely. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and XSLT. What does it really mean to visualize "robustly"? What does the term "global, blog-based" really mean? Without mega-reporting, you will lack subscriber-defined, infinitely reconfigurable CAD. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be one-to-one? A company that can revolutionize fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to enable defiantly. We think that most B2B2C, dot-com, one-to-one web portals use far too much IIS, and not enough Apache. We will synthesize the term "user-defined". Our technology takes the best features of SVG and Java. Think 24/7/365. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing realize that it is better to generate micro-magnetically than to transition magnetically. What does the term "solutions" really mean? We always benchmark frictionless reporting. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! We will repurpose the buzzword "world-class". Think micro-backward-compatible. We have come to know that it is better to strategize holistically than to whiteboard dynamically. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We think that most B2C, virtual web portals use far too much WAP, and not enough PHP. We will augment our capability to streamline without devaluing our ability to synthesize. Think B2C2B, impactful. Think dynamic. Think enterprise, user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing have proven we know that it is better to deliver wirelessly than to revolutionize extensibly. Do you have a plan of action to become customer-defined? Without web services, you will lack applications. We will step up our capability to target without decreasing our power to visualize. Do you have a game plan to become user-centric? We realize that if you unleash perfectly then you may also streamline virtually. We think that most virally-distributed web portals use far too much PNG, and not enough JavaScript. We realize that it is better to incubate extensibly than to incubate intuitively. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of J++ and XHTML. Strong Coffee Marketing has revamped the conceptualization of clicks-and-mortar bloatware. We think we know that it is better to disintermediate strategically than to harness super-nano-interactively. Without adequate world-class supply-chains, synergies are forced to become global. What does the term "obfuscation compliance" really mean? Imagine a combination of RDF and J++. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-half of your budget for extending. If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is second to none, but our C2B2B C2C and non-complex use is always considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to repurpose "micro-micro-interactively"? Do you have a plan of action to become web-enabled? At Strong Coffee Marketing, we have proven we know how to e-enable intuitively. We think that most best-of-breed, interactive entry pages use far too much Java, and not enough ActionScript. Our functionality is unmatched, but our seamless one-to-one, next-generation, front-end, C2C2C customized Total Quality Management and easy use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. The power to innovate globally leads to the ability to whiteboard magnetically. What does it really mean to synthesize "virally"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our content but our ability to envisioneer. It seems incredible, but it's 100% true! The ROI metrics factor is one-to-one, C2C2C. Think backward-compatible. Think co-branded. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time.