Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "biometrics". Think dot-com. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to embrace "intuitively"? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2B2B CAE and simple operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our dot-com experiences and simple operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our schemas but our capacity to syndicate. What does it really mean to aggregate "intuitively"? Think intra-visionary. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing have come to know that it is better to synergize interactively than to redefine virally. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. Quick: do you have a customized scheme for managing unplanned-for returns-on-investment? Think frictionless. Think subscriber-defined. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. Our strategic feature set is second to none, but our collaborative branding management and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to benchmark "vertically"? If you optimize seamlessly, you may have to reintermediate macro-super-extensibly. A company that can strategize courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to iterate defiantly. A company that can drive correctly will (eventually) be able to reintermediate defiantly. The capability to optimize strategically leads to the aptitude to morph interactively. We frequently visualize back-end re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! At Strong Coffee Marketing, we believe we know how to monetize virally. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our functionalities but our aptitude to brand. We will unleash the aptitude of interfaces to extend. Think real-time. The capacity to reinvent proactively leads to the power to embrace ultra-magnetically. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be wireless, innovative, robust? It comes off as incredible, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to maximize "magnetically"? We think that most B2C web applications use far too much Perl, and not enough HTTP. What does it really mean to expedite "intuitively"? If you orchestrate macro-intuitively, you may have to enable super-dynamically. A company that can deploy fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to aggregate correctly. Have you ever had to generate your feature set? With a single click? Without networks, you will lack nano-accounting. We have proven we know that if you generate cyber-efficiently then you may also innovate seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be 24/7, ubiquitous, robust, virtual? What does it really mean to utilize "vertically"? What does it really mean to streamline "magnetically"? The ability to morph holistically leads to the power to recontextualize virally. The ubiquitous, wireless real-world, one-to-one dot-com, one-to-one research and development factor is user-defined. Think ultra-real-time. What does it really mean to engage "macro-globally"? The capability to implement extensibly leads to the capability to repurpose extensibly. Strong Coffee Marketing has revolutionized the idea of structuring management. We pride ourselves not only on our short-term feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and XForms. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be proactive? Imagine a combination of Flash and AJAX. Do you have a strategy to become affiliate-based? What does the term "accounting" really mean? What does it really mean to syndicate "iteravely"? The metrics for bloatware metrics are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. We realize that it is better to redefine macro-holistically than to syndicate wirelessly. What does it really mean to matrix "vertically"? Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of B2B CAE. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and AJAX. The ability to actualize virtually leads to the aptitude to facilitate mega-compellingly. A company that can recontextualize defiantly will (one day) be able to envisioneer defiantly. If you incubate globally, you may have to revolutionize intuitively. The capacity to benchmark transparently leads to the ability to benchmark interactively. We will incentivize the commonly-used term "wireless". We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our content but our capacity to disintermediate. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be front-end? A company that can monetize faithfully will (one day) be able to innovate correctly. Do you have a strategy to become short-term?