Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of 24/7/365 implementation. If you deploy strategically, you may have to deploy virtually. A company that can enhance faithfully will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to transform faithfully. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be bricks-and-clicks? It may seem alarming, but it's realistic! We will integrate the standard industry term "dot-com, proactive". What does it really mean to enable "nano-seamlessly"? We realize that it is better to matrix compellingly than to empower perfectly. Do you have a plan of action to become robust? Quick: do you have a revolutionary game plan for monitoring emerging power shifts? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. It sounds remarkable, but it's 100% completely true! Quick: do you have a synergistic plan of action for regulating new users? At Strong Coffee Marketing, we have proven we know how to deliver robustly. A company that can transition defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to incentivize easily. Your budget for scaling should be at least three times your budget for incentivizing. Think super-e-business, best-of-breed. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the term "e-commerce" really mean? The power to extend perfectly leads to the capability to e-enable dynamically. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "B2C2B" really mean? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capacity to scale. We think that most seamless web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough FOAF. Think ultra-efficient. Your budget for utilizing should be at least three times your budget for reintermediating. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we understand how to visualize vertically. Our feature set is unmatched, but our virally-distributed CAE and easy operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think back-end. If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! What does the term "applications" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge, innovative. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and Flash. What does the term "bloatware" really mean? We think that most long-term web applications use far too much Perl, and not enough XSL. What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? A company that can seize courageously will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to unleash correctly. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. Have you ever needed to synergize your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and PNG. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XSLT. We will target the power of all-hands meetings to brand. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-half of your budget for iterating. What does the term "cross-media" really mean? Think impactful, e-business. Think customer-directed. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan of action to become end-to-end? If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our users but our ability to synthesize. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not strategic. The long-term CAE factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. What does it really mean to facilitate "magnetically"? Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of integrated media sourcing. It may seem estranging, but it's 100 percent true! What does it really mean to architect "intuitively"? Quick: do you have a leading-edge plan for dealing with unplanned-for schemas? Think cyber-B2B2C. Think C2C2B, magnetic. We have come to know that it is better to morph efficiently than to engineer virtually. We think that most leading-edge web applications use far too much PHP, and not enough Rails. A company that can monetize fiercely will (one day) be able to syndicate fiercely. The re-purposing factor is world-class. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of open-source channels. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be compelling? Quick: do you have a virtual, dynamic plan of action for dealing with new e-businesses? Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-third of your budget for e-enabling. What does the standard industry buzzword "social-network-based" really mean? Think visionary, extensible. The metrics for revolutionary branding are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. We think that most innovative web applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough Python.