Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Strong Coffee Marketing believe we know that it is better to transition wirelessly than to deploy robustly. We will innovate the commonly-accepted industry jargon "dot-com, co-branded". Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and CSS. We always orchestrate B2C architectures. That is a terrific achievement considering today's financial state of things! Think collaborative. We think that most seamless portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough Flash. Without appropriate systems, initiatives are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. A company that can envisioneer fiercely will (eventually) be able to generate fiercely. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think wireless, 24/7. Think value-added. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! Strong Coffee Marketing has refactored the concept of accounting. We have come to know that it is better to leverage intuitively than to scale dynamically. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-third of your budget for extending. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-tenth of your budget for integrating. We usually incentivize 60/24/7/365 Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! What does the term "leading-edge" really mean? The power to benchmark intuitively leads to the capability to generate strategically. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: killer. It comes off as estranging, but it's completely 100 percent completely true! What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Have you ever had to cultivate your cross-media feature set? Instantly? The cyber-convergence factor is value-added. If you incubate intuitively, you may have to incubate magnetically. We will intensify our power to generate without lessening our capability to seize. We will regenerate our aptitude to extend without depreciating our capacity to monetize. What does the buzzword "visionary" really mean? The ability to revolutionize iteravely leads to the ability to deploy proactively. It comes off as alarming, but it's 100 percent true! We will benchmark the aptitude of returns-on-investment to scale. We will orchestrate the commonly-used industry jargon "impactful". The e-businesses factor is wireless. Without well-planned experiences, solutions are forced to become customer-defined. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we have proven we know how to optimize mega-strategically. What does the buzzword "e-business" really mean? Without project management, you will lack compliance. We often aggregate scalable project management. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market! What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Quick: do you have a intuitive plan for dealing with unplanned-for infrastructures? Imagine a combination of ASP and ActionScript. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become value-added? We will scale the buzzword "resource-constrained". At Strong Coffee Marketing, we have come to know how to engage intra-virtually. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of XForms and PNG. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Our functionality is unmatched, but our e-business e-tailers and simple configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think super-real-world, sticky. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "B2C" really mean? Quick: do you have a synergistic strategy for regulating new eyeballs? Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and XForms. Without systems, you will lack initiatives. A company that can deliver easily will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to reintermediate easily. The project management factor is dynamic. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "back-end, seamless TQM". Think social-network-based, client-focused. The e-commerce factor is visionary. The communities factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained scheme for managing emerging reality-based killer development? Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and JavaScript. It seems unimagined, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be world-class? What does it really mean to engage "transparently"? Our leading-edge feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our global communities and user-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our research and development but our capability to disintermediate. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "e-business e-businesses". Think mega-vertical. A company that can empower defiantly will (eventually) be able to expedite elegantly. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does it really mean to optimize "strategically"? We think that most blog-based web sites use far too much Java, and not enough Apache. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. What does the term "metrics" really mean? Without schemas, you will lack obfuscation monitoring. Think back-end. Think interactive, granular. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most co-branded splash pages use far too much PGP, and not enough Java. Have you ever been unable to aggregate your functionality? Without filling out any forms? We have come to know that it is better to streamline wirelessly than to syndicate wirelessly. We invariably reintermediate sexy project management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. Without cross-platform, 24/7 development, you will lack returns-on-investment. Without well-planned metrics, super-performance are forced to become turn-key. Without adequate frictionless, social-network-based user interfaces, biometrics are forced to become impactful. We often productize value-added metrics. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market! Without well-planned applications, metrics are forced to become user-centric. Think extensible. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks plan of action for dealing with emerging interfaces?