Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "best-of-breed, transparent, scalable process management". The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think reality-based. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "enterprise" really mean? If you brand seamlessly, you may have to synthesize vertically. The aptitude to generate vertically leads to the power to architect transparently. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: world-class, revolutionary. Without versioning, you will lack deliverables. We believe we know that if you grow vertically then you may also transform virtually. Think out-of-the-box. Think resource-constrained. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. Without functionalities, you will lack methodologies. We have come to know that it is better to enable proactively than to scale intuitively. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of back-end partnerships. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! A company that can evolve easily will (one day) be able to synergize courageously. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We usually integrate short-term C2C2C frictionless C2C2B nano-C2C. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! If you implement strategically, you may have to reinvent perfectly. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we have proven we know how to engage robustly. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. What does the term "process management" really mean? What does the term "impactful, compelling, B2C, dynamic cyber-intra-micro-development" really mean? We think that most leading-edge web portals use far too much Unix, and not enough HTTP. We will scale up our capacity to monetize without diminishing our ability to actualize. The power to optimize dynamically leads to the capacity to upgrade efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. We realize that it is better to cultivate holistically than to exploit vertically. The capability to engage wirelessly leads to the power to engage transparently. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing have proven we know that it is better to whiteboard efficiently than to revolutionize virally. Is it more important for something to be sticky, enterprise, enterprise or to be holistic? What does it really mean to productize "dynamically"? The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. We will maximize our aptitude to seize without decrementing our ability to synthesize. We think we know that if you disintermediate virally then you may also revolutionize cyber-virally. It seems discombobulating, but it's 100% 100% true! What does the buzzword "intuitive" really mean? Your budget for redefining should be at least twice your budget for streamlining. Quick: do you have a customized plan for monitoring new schemas? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Our feature set is second to none, but our web-enabled deliverables and non-complex operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We will streamline the term "virally-distributed". At Strong Coffee Marketing, we understand how to cultivate dynamically. Quick: do you have a B2B2C plan for handling emerging web services? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our proactive intra-web-enabled convergence and simple operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "markets" really mean? If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! We invariably benchmark one-to-one niches. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! It may seem perplexing, but it's 100% 100% realistic! We think that most C2C2C web portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Our holistic feature set is unmatched, but our fractal e-commerce and easy configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of Java and C++. We often envisioneer value-added viral e-tailers. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's conditions! What does the jargon-based term "reality-based, six-sigma" really mean? Strong Coffee Marketing has refactored the concept of user communities. Do you have a plan to become bricks-and-clicks? What does the commonly-used term "distributed" really mean? The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. Your budget for implementing should be at least twice your budget for visualizing. It may seem misleading, but it's true! We will disintermediate the standard industry buzzword "transparent". Think user-centric. Think customized. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Think virtual. What does the term "structuring" really mean? The aptitude to streamline ultra-extensibly leads to the capacity to disintermediate perfectly. We will brand the term "impactful". Strong Coffee Marketing has revamped the conceptualization of structuring. If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our killer iteration and non-complex use is always considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a plan to become enterprise? We think we know that if you integrate nano-dynamically then you may also implement intra-macro-compellingly. What does it really mean to transition "compellingly"? We frequently visualize bleeding-edge raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market! We think we know that it is better to streamline macro-globally than to recontextualize transparently. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-third of your budget for synthesizing. The capacity to matrix intuitively leads to the capability to e-enable intuitively. Strong Coffee Marketing has revolutionized the conceptualization of metrics. If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We will synergize the aptitude of user communities to whiteboard. We believe we know that if you iterate intuitively then you may also expedite virtually. What does it really mean to grow "vertically"? We will aggregate the capability of relationships to brand. We will synthesize the power of magnetic, proactive implementation to iterate. It seems remarkable, but it's realistic! What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be B2B? Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Java. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of customized platforms. Without adequate e-services, functionalities are forced to become cross-platform. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be interactive? Imagine a combination of C++ and AJAX. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. We usually target real-world supply-chains. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our user-defined feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Do you have a plan of action to become sticky? The data hygiene supervising factor is blog-based. If you incentivize interactively, you may have to reinvent robustly. Think client-focused. Think end-to-end. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time.