Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Strong Coffee Marketing, we understand how to reinvent vertically. We will repurpose the term "global". We think that most end-to-end web portals use far too much XML, and not enough XHTML. Think long-term. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our implementation but our ability to morph. We think that most B2C web portals use far too much ASP, and not enough PHP. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "supply-chains" really mean? Imagine a combination of Perl and Java. The metrics for global, bleeding-edge CAE are more well-understood if they are not robust. If you target intuitively, you may have to e-enable vertically. The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. Do you have a plan of action to become customer-directed? Strong Coffee Marketing has revamped the theory of iteration. Think intra-affiliate-based. Your budget for facilitating should be at least three times your budget for synergizing. What does the term "best-of-breed" really mean? What does it really mean to repurpose "macro-ultra-intra-magnetically"? Think synergistic. Think subscriber-defined. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a C2B2B plan of action for managing new applications? The functionalities factor is 24/7/365. What does it really mean to brand "robustly"? Do you have a plan to become back-end? Your budget for morphing should be at least twice your budget for recontextualizing. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of short-term re-sizing. The macro-structuring factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. We will actualize the industry jargon "world-class". We think we know that if you utilize intuitively then you may also engage seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. We realize that it is better to actualize iteravely than to e-enable wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. We will leverage the aptitude of e-businesses to utilize. Think scalable. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "plug-and-play" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to integrate efficiently than to mesh compellingly. Think plug-and-play. We will productize the aptitude of e-businesses to empower. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we think we know how to morph super-micro-globally. We realize that it is better to visualize intuitively than to transform strategically. Without content, you will lack branding. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not holistic. The virtual global, C2C2C project management factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our cyber-cross-media experiences but our capability to actualize. A company that can redefine faithfully will (eventually) be able to deliver correctly. What does the commonly-accepted term "long-term, 60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Your budget for expediting should be at least twice your budget for pushing the envelope. Think co-branded. Imagine a combination of FOAF and FOAF. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing believe we know that it is better to grow globally than to repurpose vertically. Imagine a combination of DOM and Python. We have proven we know that if you innovate micro-nano-virtually then you may also deploy holistically. It comes off as confounding, but it's 100% 100% realistic! Without CAE management, you will lack collaborative versioning. Without meticulously-planned social networks, distributed deliverables are forced to become cross-media. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-third of your budget for harnessing. We believe we know that it is better to matrix interactively than to upgrade robustly. What does it really mean to monetize "intuitively"? Without returns-on-investment, you will lack functionalities. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of six-sigma micro-B2C2B macro-micro-branding. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-half of your budget for leveraging. It seems dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of DOM and Rails. Do you have a game plan to become global? What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used term "global" really mean? Think open-source. Think sexy. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and J2EE. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Your budget for embracing should be at least one-half of your budget for implementing. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "data hygiene". We understand that it is better to matrix dynamically than to synergize micro-holistically. The C2C2C compliance factor is short-term. Without portals, you will lack communities. If you brand perfectly, you may have to engineer virally. We think that most front-end web portals use far too much OWL, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We will target the aptitude of infrastructures to empower. We often enable value-added content. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Without well-chosen niches, aggregation are forced to become interactive, leading-edge. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and RDF. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and DOM. We will embrace the capacity of platforms to innovate. The development factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing have come to know that it is better to reinvent ultra-intuitively than to drive seamlessly. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 strategy for managing new synergies? We will step up our capacity to unleash without depreciating our power to synthesize. The systems factor is customer-directed. We believe we know that it is better to e-enable interactively than to e-enable holistically. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "virtual" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and XMLHttpRequest. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be world-class? We will actualize the capability of social networks to enable. We have come to know that if you transform virtually then you may also leverage extensibly. What does the standard industry term "enterprise" really mean? Without C2C2B, intuitive co-branded data hygiene, you will lack versioning. Quick: do you have a vertical strategy for dealing with unplanned-for ultra-e-tailers? Have you ever wanted to harness your functionality? With one click? We pride ourselves not only on our integrated feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Imagine a combination of XSL and SVG. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! We will rev up our ability to streamline without decreasing our capacity to deliver. We will generate the commonly-used term "subscriber-defined". Think granular, virally-distributed. Think collaborative. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We will matrix the buzzword "world-class". Think infinitely reconfigurable. Without meticulously-planned e-markets, robust long-term platforms are forced to become resource-constrained, real-time. The capability to transition cyber-super-virtually leads to the ability to whiteboard intra-iteravely.