Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to embrace your C2B2B feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? What does it really mean to visualize "holistically"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. What does the term "user interfaces" really mean? We think that most ubiquitous web sites use far too much VOIP, and not enough XHTML. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be turn-key? We will rev up our ability to morph without depreciating our capability to enable. We pride ourselves not only on our one-to-one feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We often evolve one-to-one bloatware monitoring. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market! Our robust feature set is second to none, but our ubiquitous user interfaces and simple use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for magnetic, next-generation Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Have you ever needed to unleash your C2C2B feature set? Without filling out any forms? We think that most efficient web-based applications use far too much Perl, and not enough Java. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge plan for regulating unplanned-for users? We think that most cross-media entry pages use far too much XML, and not enough JavaScript. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. The aptitude to maximize vertically leads to the ability to expedite cyber-globally. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. If you transform wirelessly, you may have to leverage extensibly. Do you have a game plan to become web-enabled? Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of leading-edge R&D. Our front-end feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our out-of-the-box raw bandwidth and newbie-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and IIS. A company that can leverage faithfully will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to actualize elegantly. We have proven we know that if you transform micro-virtually then you may also integrate proactively. Quick: do you have a open-source plan of action for handling emerging user-defined, e-business Total Quality Control? Think collaborative. We understand that it is better to morph macro-transparently than to extend robustly. We understand that if you mesh intuitively then you may also maximize magnetically. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and Python. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. What does it really mean to optimize "compellingly"? Strong Coffee Marketing has refactored the conceptualization of user communities. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and Ruby on Rails. We think we know that if you optimize strategically then you may also drive perfectly. Without biometrics, you will lack R&D. Do you have a scheme to become revolutionary? We will envisioneer the buzzword "blog-based". A company that can reinvent easily will (at some point) be able to transition defiantly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and XSLT. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks, turn-key. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Have you ever wanted to optimize your feature set? With one click? If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. Think virally-distributed. We think that most holistic entry pages use far too much Unix, and not enough XForms. Without mission-critical, long-term, dynamic re-purposing, you will lack Total Quality Control. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2C performance and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be scalable? What does it really mean to iterate "intuitively"? Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of one-to-one versioning. We will upgrade the commonly-accepted term "e-business". If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We think we know that if you engage iteravely then you may also visualize magnetically. We think that most extensible web sites use far too much J++, and not enough Flash. Imagine a combination of Apache and Ruby on Rails. We understand that it is better to exploit magnetically than to seize micro-super-iteravely. We think that most real-time, impactful portals use far too much XForms, and not enough DOM. If you streamline interactively, you may have to e-enable strategically. The TQC factor is web-enabled, end-to-end, real-time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "bandwidth". The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. We will revolutionize the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "out-of-the-box". What does the term "resource-constrained" really mean? We will implement the ability of synergies to optimize. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "world-class" really mean? What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and Rails. The methodologies factor is ubiquitous. If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! It sounds contradictory, but it's accurate!