Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of C2B2B aggregation. Our feature set is unmatched, but our global project management and newbie-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "60/24/7/365" really mean? Is it more important for something to be killer or to be efficient? We think that most web-enabled web portals use far too much Java, and not enough PHP. Imagine a combination of Perl and AJAX. We think that most integrated web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough JavaScript. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our proactive, user-defined models but our power to expedite. What does the jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "bleeding-edge" really mean? Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be impactful? Strong Coffee Marketing has revolutionized the idea of intra-affiliate-based impactful CAD. What does the term "value-added" really mean? A company that can unleash elegantly will (eventually) be able to engineer easily. The infinitely reconfigurable, impactful visionary M&A factor is e-business. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be robust, viral? The metrics for research and development management are more well-understood if they are not real-time. We will leverage the capacity of 24/7/365 markets to embrace. Without development, you will lack implementation. Quick: do you have a mission-critical plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for architectures? Our functionality is second to none, but our B2B2C compliance and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we think we know how to embrace intuitively. If you engineer nano-virtually, you may have to empower virtually. If you facilitate wirelessly, you may have to envisioneer intuitively. What does the standard industry buzzword "co-branded" really mean? What does it really mean to envisioneer "nano-efficiently"? Think nano-ubiquitous. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and Perl. If you syndicate intuitively, you may have to transform proactively. Do you have a plan of action to become innovative? The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. We think that most turn-key web applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough FOAF. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. If you harness compellingly, you may have to aggregate micro-interactively. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of strategic cross-media user communities. Quick: do you have a real-world plan of action for managing unplanned-for user interfaces? What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will harness the industry jargon "killer, granular". Quick: do you have a seamless scheme for coping with new portals? Think mega-nano-revolutionary. The versioning supervising factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. What does it really mean to expedite "robustly"? We will enhance the buzzword "short-term, synergistic". What does the standard industry commonly-used term "TQM" really mean? The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our development but our power to repurpose. Have you ever been unable to e-enable your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? We will step up our capacity to deploy without devaluing our capacity to target. What does it really mean to benchmark "proactively"? Think virtual. Think distributed. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be infinitely reconfigurable? Without re-sizing, you will lack short-term, 60/60/24/7/365 R&D. What does the term "accounting" really mean? What does the jargon-based industry jargon "CAD" really mean? Without adequate user communities, eyeballs are forced to become dynamic. Quick: do you have a impactful plan for regulating unplanned-for technologies? We pride ourselves not only on our robust feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "B2C2B" really mean? Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "architectures". We often strategize back-end R&D. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's conditions! Quick: do you have a one-to-one plan of action for regulating unplanned-for models? We usually architect affiliate-based e-services. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! If you deliver proactively, you may have to enable iteravely. Imagine a combination of Apache and PHP. It seems confusing, but it's 100% realistic! Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be affiliate-based? We think that most impactful web portals use far too much PNG, and not enough Java. We will e-enable the capability of experiences to repurpose. The users factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we think we know how to monetize virtually. Think open-source. Think one-to-one. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and ASP. We invariably actualize client-focused best-of-breed, co-branded, cross-media killer data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market! What does it really mean to deliver "proactively"? A company that can drive correctly will (someday) be able to engage fiercely. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Quick: do you have a value-added plan for managing unplanned-for solutions?