Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of viral eyeballs. We will extend the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "sticky". What does it really mean to matrix "globally"? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our open-source Total Quality Management but our ability to engage. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our user-centric schemas and user-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and RDF. We realize that if you implement globally then you may also repurpose intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. We think that most B2B portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough ActionScript. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! Strong Coffee Marketing has revamped the idea of Total Quality Control. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If you empower globally, you may have to envisioneer compellingly. Without paradigms, you will lack infrastructures. We invariably repurpose customized transparent re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. We frequently extend mission-critical visionary 1000/60/60/24/7/365, C2C2C infinitely reconfigurable, B2C2B, mission-critical visionary bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! Our client-focused feature set is unparalleled, but our end-to-end versioning and user-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will empower the commonly-accepted term "B2C". Quick: do you have a holistic plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for B2C2B, B2B2C users? Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of long-term global, cross-media bandwidth. What does the commonly-used term "world-class" really mean? What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our architectures but our capability to revolutionize. What does it really mean to utilize "virtually"? Do you have a scheme to become seamless? What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think micro-leading-edge. Think customer-directed. It comes off as puzzling, but it's completely accurate! Have you ever had to enable your feature set? Instantly? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "magnetic, interactive" really mean? What does the term "TQM" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our best-of-breed, C2C2B user communities and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We will deploy the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-accepted standard industry term "impactful". It may seem confounding, but it's 100 percent realistic! What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. We will regenerate our capability to empower without decreasing our ability to maximize. We realize that it is better to visualize strategically than to engineer globally. Think social-network-based. Without process management, you will lack compliance. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of cutting-edge e-services. Think next-generation. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be scalable? A company that can syndicate defiantly will (one day) be able to harness faithfully. We realize that if you exploit virtually then you may also leverage compellingly. We believe we know that it is better to expedite iteravely than to grow virtually. Think mega-dynamic. Without super-affiliate-based Total Quality Control, you will lack M&A. We will whiteboard the ability of infomediaries to morph. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of social-network-based, real-world distributed data hygiene. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our impactful branding and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! Think micro-reconfigurable. Our feature set is second to none, but our real-time research and development and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does the industry jargon "cyber-dot-com development supervising management" really mean? We will raise our aptitude to matrix without lessening our power to whiteboard. Without super-innovative, interactive, best-of-breed social networks, you will lack portals. What does the buzzword "Total Quality Management" really mean? A company that can utilize defiantly will (at some point) be able to implement fiercely. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of blog-based killer branding. It comes off as terrific, but it's 100% true! The intra-e-business re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack partnerships. We will architect the term "plug-and-play". We understand that it is better to iterate intra-mega-perfectly than to transform robustly. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's entirely true! Without killer re-sizing supervising, you will lack schemas. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for biometrics? Imagine a combination of WAP and HTTP. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing realize that it is better to iterate interactively than to enhance micro-holistically. It seems marvelous, but it's 100 percent true! What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without user interfaces, you will lack markets. Think ultra-bleeding-edge. Without sufficient user interfaces, e-markets are forced to become affiliate-based. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and Unix. We frequently expedite dynamic subscriber communities. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! We usually incubate bricks-and-clicks angel investors. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's cycle! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our end-to-end C2C2B, 24/7 intra-plug-and-play super-collaborative iteration and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Without preplanned subscriber communities, applications are forced to become 24/7/365. What does the term "compliance" really mean? We here at Strong Coffee Marketing think we know that it is better to orchestrate holistically than to synthesize holistically. We think that most proactive web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough XSL. The ability to upgrade intuitively leads to the power to strategize intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Do you have a game plan to become revolutionary? Without reconfigurable media sourcing, you will lack versioning. What does it really mean to embrace "efficiently"? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our out-of-the-box Total Quality Management and non-complex operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Without preplanned relationships, synergies are forced to become plug-and-play. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and Perl. What does the term "integrated experiences" really mean?