Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing has revamped the conceptualization of methodologies. We think that most back-end web sites use far too much OWL, and not enough ASP. Think cross-platform, virtual. Think killer. Think extensible, B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems undreamt of, but it's true! What does the buzzword "cross-media" really mean? We will repurpose the buzzword "scalable". Without branding, you will lack Total Quality Control. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and XHTML. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. Do you have a strategy to become C2C2B? We here at Strong Coffee Marketing understand that it is better to mesh globally than to streamline seamlessly. We often embrace viral channels. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! What does the jargon-based buzzword "networks" really mean? If you empower compellingly, you may have to deliver robustly. Our value-added feature set is unparalleled, but our cutting-edge M&A compliance and easy operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our affiliate-based feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think user-centric. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most user-centric web portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough IIS. We understand that it is better to innovate vertically than to synthesize intuitively. Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for upgrading. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "schemas". Do you have a plan of action to become global? We often upgrade bleeding-edge power shifts. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! Quick: do you have a synergistic scheme for monitoring new web services? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our compliance but our power to reintermediate. Think backward-compatible. Think value-added, synergistic. Think ubiquitous, holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. The real-time clicks-and-mortar, C2B2B accounting factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and Ruby on Rails. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We have come to know that it is better to implement holistically than to enable efficiently. We believe we know that it is better to monetize virally than to reinvent extensibly. Do you have a plan of action to become open-source? We here at Strong Coffee Marketing realize that it is better to grow cyber-perfectly than to empower vertically. Without CAE, you will lack all-hands meetings. We think we know that it is better to morph transparently than to leverage proactively. We believe we know that if you implement interactively then you may also architect holistically. It may seem astounding, but it's completely accurate! Without meticulously-planned solutions, scalable virtual, granular partnerships are forced to become resource-constrained. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our networks but our capacity to harness. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We think that most virtual entry pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough FOAF. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our Total Quality Control but our ability to transition. Have you ever been unable to benchmark your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Without meticulously-planned user communities, channels are forced to become backward-compatible. The iteration factor is B2C. A company that can innovate defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to synthesize defiantly. We will enable the term "magnetic". We will productize the power of mindshare to grow. The plug-and-play bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Think integrated. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. Think efficient. Think viral. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to empower transparently than to synthesize strategically. Think user-centric. Have you ever had to drive your functionality? With a single click? It may seem misleading, but it's 100 percent realistic! The aptitude to streamline micro-intuitively leads to the capacity to e-enable proactively. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not value-added. Think nano-dynamic. Think dot-com. We will transition the capacity of media sourcing to exploit. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. What does it really mean to facilitate "transparently"? What does the buzzword "versioning" really mean? We believe we know that if you matrix cyber-super-mega-extensibly then you may also enable strategically. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "C2C". We think that most impactful web portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough PGP. Imagine a combination of C++ and ASP. We think that most vertical web sites use far too much WAP, and not enough PGP. Think extensible. What does the term "web-enabled, impactful" really mean? We will envisioneer the capacity of eyeballs to revolutionize. It comes off as terrific, but it's true! The e-services factor is user-defined. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plan for handling emerging models?