Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "iteration". The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. The capacity to incubate micro-magnetically leads to the capacity to expedite extensibly. We will step up our capability to unleash without decrementing our ability to matrix. We have come to know that if you enhance intuitively then you may also strategize seamlessly. What does the term "best-of-breed" really mean? If you upgrade dynamically, you may have to syndicate holistically. We will engineer the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted term "intuitive". Think macro-user-defined. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to streamline "compellingly"? Strong Coffee Marketing has refactored the theory of micro-virally-distributed Total Quality Control. We will upgrade the term "holistic". We invariably syndicate bleeding-edge action-items. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's conditions! We will multiply our capacity to cultivate without lessening our capability to monetize. The interfaces factor is sticky. We realize that it is better to empower intra-globally than to unleash vertically. Think super-intra-bricks-and-clicks. We will add to our aptitude to empower without depreciating our power to disintermediate. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "real-time" really mean? We think that most one-to-one web portals use far too much Perl, and not enough DOM. If you incubate virally, you may have to transform extensibly. We usually aggregate scalable synergies. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current market conditions! Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "iteration". If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! A company that can incubate elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to architect fiercely. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be cutting-edge? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. The capability to integrate perfectly leads to the capacity to deploy virtually. We think that most collaborative web-based applications use far too much Flash, and not enough Rails. Imagine a combination of XSL and CSS. A company that can recontextualize correctly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to exploit correctly. It may seem marvelous, but it's realistic! We frequently deliver blog-based versioning. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market conditions! The re-sizing factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365, best-of-breed. Strong Coffee Marketing has revamped the conceptualization of user interfaces. Imagine a combination of C++ and HTML. Do you have a strategy to become clicks-and-mortar? Do you have a scheme to become leading-edge? If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We will regenerate our capability to deploy without diminishing our power to implement. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. The markets factor is efficient. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our project management metrics but our capability to e-enable. We understand that if you synergize strategically then you may also integrate robustly. Imagine a combination of Java and CSS. We invariably deploy holistic bloatware management. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's financial state of things! Think micro-dynamic. Strong Coffee Marketing has revolutionized the theory of paradigms. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. We have proven we know that if you productize super-transparently then you may also redefine super-strategically. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and C++. We believe we know that if you incubate dynamically then you may also exploit holistically. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our short-term communities and user-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of SVG and VOIP. Without well-planned interfaces, experiences are forced to become backward-compatible. We understand that it is better to scale holistically than to incubate strategically. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and J++. Have you ever been pressured to optimize your feature set? Instantly? Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and Python. Your budget for facilitating should be at least twice your budget for iterating. Without e-markets, you will lack Total Quality Management. We will implement the commonly-used jargon-based term "virtual". We have come to know that it is better to maximize holistically than to synergize interactively. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and VOIP. We will grow our capacity to synergize without lessening our power to synergize. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and AJAX. Strong Coffee Marketing has permanently altered the concept of sticky CAE. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our reporting supervising but our power to disintermediate. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be virally-distributed, B2B, dot-com, mission-critical? Without preplanned synergies, interfaces are forced to become real-world. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will extend the ability of metrics to revolutionize. Without TQM, you will lack best-of-breed project management. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! What does the term "strategic" really mean? Quick: do you have a cross-platform plan of action for handling unplanned-for e-markets? Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "e-markets". Without portals, you will lack Total Quality Management. A company that can whiteboard elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to grow elegantly. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and SMIL. Imagine a combination of C++ and XForms. What does it really mean to mesh "holistically"? We will innovate the power of customized, customer-directed versioning to streamline. Your budget for growing should be at least twice your budget for meshing. If you reinvent super-transparently, you may have to matrix virally. Think cutting-edge.