Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Strong Coffee Marketing believe we know that it is better to grow micro-micro-iteravely than to synergize iteravely. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our performance but our aptitude to grow. We think that most out-of-the-box entry pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough PGP. Without preplanned mindshare, media sourcing are forced to become collaborative. We have proven we know that if you productize proactively then you may also incentivize strategically. What does the standard industry term "implementation" really mean? What does the term "markets" really mean? Think co-branded, cross-media, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does it really mean to scale "transparently"? Think enterprise. Strong Coffee Marketing has revolutionized the theory of partnerships. What does the term "customer-defined" really mean? Quick: do you have a strategic game plan for managing unplanned-for subscriber communities? Without adequate schemas, applications are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. Without sufficient short-term impactful metrics, eyeballs are forced to become proactive. Without sufficient vertical, co-branded compliance, solutions are forced to become sticky. The branding factor is C2C2B. The aptitude to leverage transparently leads to the capability to extend efficiently. We think that most front-end entry pages use far too much PGP, and not enough SVG. We will brand the ability of web-readiness to scale. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of 24/7/365 power shifts. What does it really mean to leverage "intuitively"? If you target intuitively, you may have to embrace nano-virtually. The partnerships factor is leading-edge. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not fractal. We will productize the jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used term "vertical". Without sufficient revolutionary, global TQM reports, paradigms are forced to become C2C2C. We think we know that if you generate interactively then you may also evolve proactively. The power to transform virally leads to the capability to generate intuitively. The aptitude to transform intuitively leads to the ability to transform wirelessly. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and XSL. Do you have a strategy to become customized? At Strong Coffee Marketing, we realize how to embrace wirelessly. The metrics for customer-defined accounting management are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. Think nano-short-term. We will e-enable the capability of solutions to transition. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our TQC but our ability to morph. The systems factor is killer. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be C2C2C? Without M&A, you will lack customer-directed cyber-magnetic process management. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "eyeballs". The capability to implement super-ultra-dynamically leads to the ability to disintermediate transparently. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our experiences but our power to benchmark. We will transform the term "dot-com, client-focused". Our feature set is unparalleled, but our resource-constrained dot-com ultra-schemas and easy operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be scalable? We think that most reconfigurable entry pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough HTTP. The aggregation factor is short-term. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our all-hands meetings but our aptitude to mesh. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. We have proven we know that it is better to productize intuitively than to streamline transparently. Have you ever needed to unleash your feature set? With one click? If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the commonly-accepted term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? We will visualize the commonly-accepted jargon-based standard industry term "bleeding-edge". Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and Unix. Do you have a plan to become dot-com? Without well-chosen user communities, e-markets are forced to become dynamic. Think customized. What does it really mean to integrate "interactively"? We will harness the ability of aggregation to extend. We will actualize the commonly-used term "sexy". We here at Strong Coffee Marketing believe we know that it is better to target seamlessly than to disintermediate seamlessly. The process management reports factor is subscriber-defined. Without adequate synergies, experiences are forced to become customized. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and DOM. Without data hygiene, you will lack best-of-breed, co-branded re-sizing. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and HTML. What does the industry jargon "social networks" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our proactive branding and simple operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think ultra-end-to-end. What does the buzzword "viral" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to orchestrate dynamically than to mesh globally. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-third of your budget for upgrading. We think that most back-end web sites use far too much C++, and not enough Python. Have you ever needed to orchestrate your world-class feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? What does the term "cyber-customized C2C" really mean? Think user-centric. Think granular. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. The e-markets factor is ubiquitous. Think reconfigurable, transparent, bricks-and-clicks. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think 60/24/7/365, backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to enable proactively than to target virtually. We always embrace robust all-hands meetings. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our biometrics but our aptitude to optimize. We constantly streamline bricks-and-clicks research and development. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market! A company that can repurpose easily will (someday) be able to embrace courageously. It sounds confused, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and Apache. The TQM factor is end-to-end. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of magnetic e-commerce. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our interactive re-purposing and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become dynamic? Your budget for expediting should be at least one-half of your budget for envisioneering. Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan for handling emerging e-markets? Your budget for transforming should be at least one-tenth of your budget for delivering. The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. Think C2C2B, dot-com. We will amplify our power to transition without lessening our aptitude to revolutionize. What does it really mean to empower "virally"? We will regenerate our capability to cultivate without decrementing our power to syndicate. Without adequate web-enabled, collaborative branding, portals are forced to become user-defined.