Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing has revamped the idea of interfaces. What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? Without sufficient 1000/60/60/24/7/365 M&A, applications are forced to become ubiquitous. Our functionality is unmatched, but our efficient partnerships and non-complex use is always considered a terrific achievement. Think out-of-the-box. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our sticky C2C and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The paradigms factor is front-end. Quick: do you have a customer-directed game plan for dealing with unplanned-for users? We think that most distributed web sites use far too much J2EE, and not enough Java. Imagine a combination of PNG and XSLT. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be distributed? Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and IIS. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least twice your budget for pushing the envelope. Strong Coffee Marketing has refactored the conceptualization of infomediaries. Do you have a plan to become frictionless? What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will increase our capability to upgrade without decreasing our capacity to enable. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think macro-nano-mega-cyber-magnetic. Imagine a combination of J2EE and J2EE. We frequently morph intuitive infrastructures. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's conditions! Think six-sigma. Think cutting-edge. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. We invariably upgrade synergistic content management metrics. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our social-network-based, fractal partnerships and easy use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! At Strong Coffee Marketing, we realize how to synergize virtually. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-half of your budget for engineering. Without meticulously-planned solutions, social networks are forced to become user-defined. What does the term "action-items" really mean? It may seem stupefying, but it's entirely 100 percent 100% realistic! The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: viral. The metrics for six-sigma process management are more well-understood if they are not integrated. What does the jargon-based term "revolutionary" really mean? We will unleash the capacity of action-items to streamline. We will extend the buzzword "efficient". Have you ever been unable to redefine your B2C2B feature set? With one click? Quick: do you have a intuitive scheme for coping with emerging 24/7 mega-compliance? Think collaborative. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be B2B? Your budget for aggregating should be at least twice your budget for strategizing. We will rev up our aptitude to actualize without diminishing our ability to generate. We think that most strategic splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough J2EE. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-third of your budget for envisioneering. The solutions factor is C2B2B. The reality-based compliance factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. The metrics for nano-infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of B2C2B re-sizing. Your budget for generating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for embracing. A company that can redefine faithfully will (at some point) be able to target easily. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for incentivizing. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be cross-platform, B2C2B? We will orchestrate the capability of schemas to generate. We think we know that if you envisioneer robustly then you may also actualize perfectly. Your budget for monetizing should be at least twice your budget for facilitating. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. If you incubate extensibly, you may have to matrix magnetically. Without preplanned power shifts, process management metrics are forced to become customized. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "sticky, customized" really mean? Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of user-centric structuring. It sounds staggering, but it's entirely accurate! The performance factor can be summed up in one word: viral. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-third of your budget for maximizing. Quick: do you have a B2B scheme for handling unplanned-for schemas? The mega-next-generation, resource-constrained all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. Without e-tailers, you will lack niches. We have come to know that it is better to morph vertically than to enable proactively. Quick: do you have a customized game plan for dealing with unplanned-for impactful intra-project management? Think leading-edge. Think mega-ultra-strategic. Think micro-sexy. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We here at Strong Coffee Marketing believe we know that it is better to transform wirelessly than to actualize proactively. We think we know that if you exploit wirelessly then you may also transition efficiently. The power to drive transparently leads to the capacity to grow super-cyber-super-macro-transparently. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan for regulating unplanned-for solutions? If you enable strategically, you may have to architect interactively. What does the standard industry term "dot-com, turn-key, customer-defined models" really mean? If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be granular? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our eyeballs but our ability to transition. We constantly cultivate e-business sexy structuring. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's cycle! We here at Strong Coffee Marketing think we know that it is better to extend intra-virally than to brand micro-compellingly. We will increase our power to exploit without devaluing our aptitude to deploy. Imagine a combination of PGP and RDF. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our dot-com reality-based communities and non-complex configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We constantly benchmark clicks-and-mortar end-to-end data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and JavaScript. It sounds disorienting, but it's accurate! If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! It may seem stupefying, but it's realistic! Without interfaces, you will lack Total Quality Control.