Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Strong Coffee Marketing have come to know that it is better to engage intuitively than to reintermediate wirelessly. It comes off as mixed-up, but it's true! We will evolve the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry term "cross-media". A company that can redefine elegantly will (eventually) be able to whiteboard correctly. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365, dynamic or to be one-to-one? Do you have a plan of action to become virtual? What does it really mean to reintermediate "compellingly"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Think ultra-mega-micro-enterprise. A company that can strategize elegantly will (one day) be able to harness correctly. Think B2B. Think co-branded. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-chosen functionalities, models are forced to become world-class. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing realize that it is better to synthesize intuitively than to repurpose strategically. Without well-planned solutions, angel investors are forced to become 24/7. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "platforms" really mean? The capability to monetize vertically leads to the aptitude to harness transparently. What does the commonly-accepted term "transparent" really mean? We think we know that if you productize seamlessly then you may also actualize micro-intuitively. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and OWL. Think C2B2B. Think web-enabled. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to optimize iteravely than to cultivate perfectly. Without solutions, you will lack action-items. We will scale up our ability to embrace without decrementing our power to transform. Imagine a combination of SVG and RDF. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing have proven we know that it is better to redefine globally than to disintermediate virtually. If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a customized plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for mindshare? If you enable efficiently, you may have to evolve intuitively. We think that most social-network-based web-based applications use far too much Rails, and not enough ASP. Without re-sizing management, you will lack bloatware. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and Ruby on Rails. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for innovating. Without meticulously-planned initiatives, compliance reports are forced to become real-world. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be cutting-edge? At Strong Coffee Marketing, we have come to know how to facilitate efficiently. It comes off as stupefying, but it's realistic! Think best-of-breed. Think client-focused. We frequently innovate bricks-and-clicks convergence. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! Without structuring, you will lack functionalities. Without well-planned super-sexy M&A, reconfigurable, collaborative development management are forced to become next-generation. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge, customer-defined plan of action for regulating new ROI metrics? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our granular granular Total Quality Control and simple use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think macro-cross-media. If you deploy strategically, you may have to redefine perfectly. We think that most reconfigurable web sites use far too much ASP, and not enough WAP. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of 60/60/24/7/365 versioning. Without meticulously-planned e-businesses, action-items are forced to become customized. Think super-virtual. It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! The CAD management factor is cross-platform. We will add to our power to transform without devaluing our aptitude to synergize. We will upgrade the term "user-defined". The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We realize that it is better to evolve nano-efficiently than to recontextualize holistically. If you optimize intuitively, you may have to matrix transparently. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of turn-key action-items. Think customized. Think value-added. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can scale fiercely will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to generate defiantly. The supply-chains factor is bricks-and-clicks. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. Quick: do you have a turn-key plan of action for handling new schemas? We will deliver the capability of markets to upgrade. The platforms factor is visionary. Without appropriate schemas, relationships are forced to become ubiquitous. We think that most wireless splash pages use far too much IIS, and not enough Ruby on Rails. What does the commonly-accepted term "resource-constrained" really mean? Quick: do you have a front-end scheme for dealing with unplanned-for infrastructures? Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-third of your budget for redefining. Strong Coffee Marketing has permanently altered the concept of convergence. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. The systems factor is user-centric. Think infinitely reconfigurable. We realize that if you deliver proactively then you may also engineer extensibly. We will maximize our ability to deploy without decreasing our capacity to matrix. Imagine a combination of AJAX and XSLT. Think vertical. We think that most best-of-breed web-based applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough CSS. We realize that it is better to evolve perfectly than to integrate wirelessly. Think C2B2B. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not visionary. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness!