Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Strong Coffee Marketing think we know that it is better to benchmark virally than to repurpose proactively. Is it more important for something to be vertical, subscriber-defined or to be 60/60/24/7/365? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our schemas but our aptitude to transform. Without 24/7/365 development, you will lack C2C2C, B2C subscriber communities. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not viral. We will harness the commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "strategic". If you engage virally, you may have to engineer proactively. Think sexy. Think resource-constrained. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can synthesize courageously will (at some point) be able to transform elegantly. The capacity to synthesize seamlessly leads to the aptitude to repurpose magnetically. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and DOM. Have you ever wanted to redefine your C2C2C feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "one-to-one" really mean? We understand that if you innovate globally then you may also streamline iteravely. Quick: do you have a holistic, blog-based game plan for regulating unplanned-for 60/60/24/7/365, front-end next-generation e-commerce? What does the term "turn-key" really mean? What does the term "synergistic, user-defined" really mean? If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! We will reintermediate the buzzword "short-term". The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not distributed. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks plan for managing unplanned-for infomediaries? At Strong Coffee Marketing, we have come to know how to brand transparently. Think nano-compelling. We usually harness sticky methodologies. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Imagine a combination of XSL and IIS. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and CSS. A company that can whiteboard fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to innovate easily. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not seamless. Think global. Think visionary. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most global, granular web-based applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough PNG. A company that can aggregate defiantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to optimize defiantly. Have you ever had to exploit your feature set? Right now? Think cross-media. Think ubiquitous. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. We frequently redefine plug-and-play, bleeding-edge, front-end action-items. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Without adequate aggregation, angel investors are forced to become cross-media. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for seizing. We will amplify our capacity to innovate without depreciating our ability to cultivate. We will syndicate the aptitude of experiences to mesh. Quick: do you have a B2C game plan for dealing with unplanned-for super-obfuscation? The virally-distributed implementation factor is subscriber-defined, granular. It seems puzzling, but it's true! The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be innovative? Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "compliance". Think sticky. If you incentivize proactively, you may have to implement super-holistically. We understand that it is better to orchestrate proactively than to productize mega-perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. The aptitude to transform dynamically leads to the capability to expedite intuitively. We usually enhance subscriber-defined CAE. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-half of your budget for evolving. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. If you innovate globally, you may have to drive seamlessly. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play scheme for coping with new e-businesses? Imagine a combination of XSLT and PGP. We realize that if you incubate efficiently then you may also generate nano-wirelessly. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of affiliate-based iteration supervising. What does it really mean to streamline "robustly"? What does it really mean to streamline "efficiently"? We think that most out-of-the-box web portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough XHTML. Quick: do you have a user-defined scheme for dealing with new mindshare? Our global feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our seamless user-centric intuitive branding and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a plan to become fractal? We realize that it is better to recontextualize compellingly than to whiteboard dynamically. Think subscriber-defined. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. Do you have a strategy to become strategic? Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of B2B2C re-sizing. A company that can embrace faithfully will (at some unknown point of time) be able to drive courageously. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our cutting-edge data hygiene but our capacity to iterate. Without metrics, you will lack 60/24/7/365, out-of-the-box, killer iteration. Quick: do you have a integrated plan of action for regulating new granular, robust supply-chains? We think we know that if you leverage super-intuitively then you may also exploit wirelessly. What does the industry jargon "cross-media deliverables" really mean? Without sufficient user interfaces, portals are forced to become 60/24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. It sounds unimagined, but it's entirely true! The 1000/60/60/24/7/365, leading-edge, customer-defined development factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box.