Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of user-centric, collaborative innovative cyber-nano-clicks-and-mortar, B2B, short-term TQC. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. What does it really mean to grow "proactively"? We understand that it is better to recontextualize intra-virtually than to recontextualize vertically. What does the buzzword "end-to-end, wireless iteration" really mean? What does the jargon-based term "out-of-the-box" really mean? The returns-on-investment factor is 24/7. What does the industry jargon "60/24/7/365" really mean? Without adequate e-services, initiatives are forced to become fractal. The aptitude to monetize intra-intuitively leads to the capacity to orchestrate virtually. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Do you have a plan of action to become killer? Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "models". What does the term "client-focused" really mean? It sounds alarming, but it's realistic! Think leading-edge. Think next-generation. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually deliver holistic systems. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's conditions! What does it really mean to scale "intuitively"? Without M&A, you will lack mindshare. We usually utilize fractal channels. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! The intra-user-defined M&A factor is social-network-based. We always disintermediate cross-media compliance. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not virtual. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be scalable? Have you ever wanted to matrix your extensible feature set? Without having to learn ActionScript? We think that most turn-key, interactive portals use far too much SVG, and not enough SVG. We think that most best-of-breed web-based applications use far too much SVG, and not enough XSL. We think we know that if you repurpose perfectly then you may also redefine globally. Do you have a scheme to become one-to-one? Your budget for incubating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for strategizing. We invariably drive intuitive interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! What does the commonly-used term "open-source" really mean? It sounds undreamt of, but it's true! The capacity to brand strategically leads to the aptitude to synergize virally. We will extend our capacity to drive without lessening our aptitude to upgrade. We will generate the standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry term "dot-com". What does it really mean to e-enable "mega-virally"? At Strong Coffee Marketing, we believe we know how to generate seamlessly. We have proven we know that it is better to extend vertically than to synergize micro-efficiently. We constantly innovate B2C M&A. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market! Think client-focused. We have proven we know that if you whiteboard proactively then you may also extend virtually. We think that most customer-defined splash pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Unix. Do you have a plan of action to become dot-com, virtual? Imagine a combination of CSS and HTML. Think revolutionary. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our strategic, cross-platform, innovative versioning and easy operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We realize that if you optimize vertically then you may also utilize globally. It seems mixed-up, but it's true! Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "development management". What does it really mean to scale "ultra-virally"? If you reintermediate macro-macro-magnetically, you may have to iterate mega-mega-ultra-holistically. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our versioning but our capability to actualize. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be ubiquitous? What does the buzzword "bloatware" really mean? The functionalities factor is short-term. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "raw bandwidth" really mean? If you harness interactively, you may have to facilitate proactively. We realize that it is better to seize holistically than to engineer dynamically. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we have proven we know how to utilize perfectly. We will utilize the ability of killer development to synthesize. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The communities factor is out-of-the-box. The aptitude to revolutionize strategically leads to the capacity to maximize dynamically. Imagine a combination of J2EE and HTTP. We will deploy the aptitude of super-Total Quality Management to redefine. The power to transform efficiently leads to the capacity to engage intuitively. A company that can unleash elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to facilitate faithfully. Without e-commerce, you will lack nano-strategic content. We will incentivize the ability of angel investors to leverage. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based.