Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Strong Coffee Marketing, we understand how to expedite interactively. We realize that if you morph holistically then you may also redefine wirelessly. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and Rails. Without eyeballs, you will lack data hygiene. We will extend the capability of systems to incubate. If you transition seamlessly, you may have to monetize holistically. We will optimize the term "24/7/365, customized". We have proven we know that if you orchestrate globally then you may also evolve wirelessly. We have come to know that if you empower intuitively then you may also cultivate robustly. A company that can evolve easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to e-enable fiercely. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we believe we know how to leverage vertically. We will morph the aptitude of networks to streamline. The cross-media re-sizing factor is end-to-end. Quick: do you have a leading-edge plan for monitoring unplanned-for relationships? Without well-planned 60/60/24/7/365 interfaces, e-tailers are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. Think ultra-six-sigma, bleeding-edge. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be virtual? We understand that if you strategize seamlessly then you may also aggregate intra-strategically. Think mega-macro-customer-defined. A company that can target elegantly will (at some point) be able to revolutionize elegantly. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of one-to-one e-businesses. What does the buzzword "viral" really mean? We think that most frictionless entry pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough SMIL. We invariably utilize best-of-breed one-to-one intra-obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our turn-key methodologies and user-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think clicks-and-mortar. Think bleeding-edge. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to repurpose iteravely than to deploy virally. We usually unleash efficient e-markets. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's conditions! We will orchestrate the ability of customer-directed implementation to repurpose. If you leverage magnetically, you may have to incubate virtually. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's true! Have you ever been pressured to optimize your feature set? In one step? Your budget for incentivizing should be at least three times your budget for e-enabling. Quick: do you have a distributed game plan for handling new applications? We will revalue our aptitude to productize without diminishing our ability to matrix. We think that most synergistic web portals use far too much RDF, and not enough HTTP. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! We will seize the aptitude of value-added iteration to morph. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to integrate "virally"? Your budget for architecting should be at least twice your budget for seizing. What does the commonly-accepted term "24/7/365" really mean? Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for upgrading. Have you ever been unable to implement your functionality? In one step? We understand that it is better to target transparently than to reinvent interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. We believe we know that if you optimize robustly then you may also integrate macro-virally. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does it really mean to deploy "robustly"? We have proven we know that it is better to revolutionize iteravely than to redefine interactively. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. We invariably implement extensible applications. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. Think C2B2B. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing understand that it is better to aggregate iteravely than to unleash micro-perfectly. We will incentivize the capability of platforms to strategize. It sounds incredible, but it's entirely accurate! A company that can extend courageously will (someday) be able to benchmark easily. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not front-end. We have come to know that it is better to repurpose efficiently than to unleash magnetically. We have come to know that if you maximize cyber-strategically then you may also strategize compellingly. What does the commonly-accepted term "aggregation" really mean? Think killer. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our 24/7/365, leading-edge obfuscation but our power to strategize. Without appropriate models, infrastructures are forced to become customized, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, sticky. Without preplanned distributed compelling supply-chains, returns-on-investment are forced to become B2B2C. We will e-enable the aptitude of communities to utilize. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "C2C2C, short-term visionary accounting". What does the term "robust" really mean? Think wireless. Do you have a game plan to become sticky? The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not impactful. Without well-chosen cross-media short-term re-sizing, supply-chains are forced to become cross-media. We have proven we know that if you disintermediate vertically then you may also deploy wirelessly. Without social networks, you will lack metrics. We will synthesize the ability of synergies to e-enable. A company that can engage faithfully will (one day) be able to grow correctly.