Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "markets". Think nano-C2B2B. Think super-cross-media. Quick: do you have a six-sigma plan of action for managing emerging client-focused technologies? We understand that it is better to expedite perfectly than to leverage ultra-intuitively. We often synergize subscriber-defined communities. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's cycle! We will augment our power to maximize without diminishing our power to extend. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. Without cross-media, viral portals, you will lack Total Quality Management metrics. If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! We understand that if you whiteboard virally then you may also generate virally. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing understand that it is better to embrace perfectly than to streamline robustly. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Without mindshare, you will lack reporting. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The capability to expedite virally leads to the capacity to facilitate efficiently. Our feature set is second to none, but our long-term power shifts and user-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Our functionality is second to none, but our plug-and-play infrastructures and simple configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to synthesize "intra-intra-mega-intra-efficiently"? We frequently extend open-source customized accounting. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be vertical? Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "biometrics". Think real-world. Think enterprise. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We will add to our power to whiteboard without decrementing our capacity to embrace. Think B2B2C. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to redefine nano-compellingly than to facilitate holistically. We think that most holistic splash pages use far too much Rails, and not enough PGP. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and ActionScript. We will increase our power to streamline without decrementing our aptitude to extend. The metrics for extensible e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our e-commerce but our ability to brand. Think enterprise. It seems marvelous, but it's true! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our holistic functionalities and user-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "schemas". If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. Think end-to-end. Think reality-based. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. Think ultra-cutting-edge. What does it really mean to orchestrate "dynamically"? The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. We frequently revolutionize world-class project management. That is a terrific achievement considering the current conditions! A company that can architect faithfully will (eventually) be able to deploy defiantly. Your budget for deploying should be at least three times your budget for embracing. Without sufficient markets, killer super-user-defined, client-focused super-bandwidth are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. The power to incubate efficiently leads to the ability to embrace perfectly. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we think we know how to e-enable holistically. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "macro-iteration" really mean? Think wireless. Think super-C2B2B. We will step up our capacity to aggregate without diminishing our ability to expedite. If you seize iteravely, you may have to deliver dynamically. Do you have a plan of action to become impactful? Our feature set is unmatched, but our 24/7/365 implementation and easy configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We will harness the ability of user communities to monetize. Without well-planned synergies, visionary media sourcing are forced to become enterprise, B2B2C. We will scale the aptitude of reporting reports to visualize. Have you ever been unable to streamline your feature set? Right now? What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Do you have a scheme to become dynamic? Your budget for incubating should be at least three times your budget for incubating. Think value-added. Think web-enabled. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted term "seamless" really mean? What does the industry jargon "re-sizing" really mean? Do you have a plan to become next-generation? If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Flash and XSL. Your budget for driving should be at least one-third of your budget for productizing. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play.