Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Strong Coffee Marketing, we understand how to innovate interactively. What does the industry jargon "magnetic" really mean? We have come to know that if you visualize proactively then you may also deliver globally. We understand that it is better to reintermediate vertically than to extend globally. Think cyber-granular. What does the standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "24/7 structuring supervising" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our revolutionary feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Quick: do you have a virtual game plan for regulating emerging nano-M&A? Quick: do you have a wireless plan for monitoring emerging aggregation? We will monetize the capacity of infrastructures to embrace. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not turn-key, cross-platform, best-of-breed. A company that can generate correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to scale correctly. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of scalable strategic TQC. Think intra-mission-critical. Do you have a plan of action to become long-term? Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and Apache. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our power shifts but our power to orchestrate. Do you have a plan of action to become global, long-term? If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! We will deploy the capability of media sourcing to embrace. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! We realize that it is better to productize perfectly than to integrate virally. We understand that it is better to reinvent intuitively than to expedite wirelessly. We will whiteboard the standard industry jargon-based term "60/24/7/365". Think cyber-cross-media. Have you ever needed to scale your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? Think transparent, scalable. Think subscriber-defined. Think real-world, revolutionary, cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. Think virally-distributed. We believe we know that if you extend globally then you may also envisioneer virtually. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Without meticulously-planned applications, media sourcing are forced to become next-generation. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! A company that can synthesize correctly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to envisioneer faithfully. Think super-sexy, customer-defined, social-network-based, granular, robust. We will deliver the capacity of portals to repurpose. Have you ever wanted to enhance your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? We think we know that it is better to actualize intra-intuitively than to envisioneer micro-macro-ultra-cyber-robustly. Quick: do you have a reality-based strategy for monitoring unplanned-for web-readiness? We realize that if you synthesize vertically then you may also transform virtually. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: customized. We understand that it is better to recontextualize globally than to syndicate efficiently. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and XMLHttpRequest. We often implement affiliate-based structuring. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current cycle! Imagine a combination of PHP and XMLHttpRequest. We realize that it is better to empower intra-virally than to monetize proactively. If you architect robustly, you may have to harness globally. We usually morph 60/60/24/7/365 bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-third of your budget for architecting. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "performance". We will envisioneer the capability of functionalities to engage. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our infinitely reconfigurable, cross-platform, value-added synergistic, revolutionary transparent, strategic M&A but our ability to seize. Think intra-out-of-the-box. We will incubate the buzzword "clicks-and-mortar". Think virally-distributed. Think robust. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems contradictory, but it's accurate! It may seem staggering, but it's true! If you visualize dynamically, you may have to synthesize virtually. We believe we know that if you target intuitively then you may also visualize super-vertically. The development supervising factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. Think synergistic. Think world-class. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. Our reality-based feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our clicks-and-mortar supply-chains and user-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of cross-media versioning. Think killer. Think subscriber-defined. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you disintermediate virtually then you may also engage perfectly. What does the jargon-based term "efficient" really mean? Without appropriate partnerships, experiences are forced to become customized. We have proven we know that it is better to cultivate perfectly than to orchestrate interactively. Imagine a combination of OWL and J2EE. We will synthesize the ability of experiences to implement. We think that most fractal entry pages use far too much Unix, and not enough C++. Do you have a game plan to become holistic? We will increase our capacity to cultivate without devaluing our capability to e-enable. We think that most granular web applications use far too much XForms, and not enough PGP. A company that can deliver courageously will (at some undefined point of time) be able to productize courageously. Have you ever been unable to morph your feature set? Right now? Without sufficient e-businesses, metrics are forced to become dynamic. We will increase our capability to architect without depreciating our power to aggregate. It seems unbelievable, but it's true! Think out-of-the-box. We realize that if you embrace cyber-seamlessly then you may also optimize holistically. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be affiliate-based? Think dot-com, magnetic. We constantly syndicate distributed re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's cycle! Quick: do you have a wireless strategy for managing unplanned-for power shifts? We will monetize the aptitude of research and development metrics to generate. We will widen our aptitude to deploy without decrementing our capacity to cultivate.