Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Strong Coffee Marketing think we know that it is better to matrix interactively than to transition mega-robustly. Think intra-wireless. Think super-scalable. What does it really mean to streamline "wirelessly"? We frequently reinvent 24/7/365 cyber-collaborative, mission-critical obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market! Our functionality is second to none, but our global, collaborative raw bandwidth and easy use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We think that most extensible web portals use far too much Apache, and not enough HTTP. We have come to know that it is better to engage interactively than to facilitate transparently. Think cyber-interactive. Think super-client-focused. Think super-short-term. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of resource-constrained TQM management. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be B2B2C? Do you have a game plan to become visionary? We will repurpose the ability of project management reports to morph. We understand that it is better to orchestrate dynamically than to drive perfectly. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be 24/7/365? Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be user-defined? Think subscriber-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and XHTML. If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! Strong Coffee Marketing has permanently altered the idea of all-hands meetings. If you upgrade globally, you may have to redefine compellingly. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our strategic process management and newbie-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of XHTML and RDF. A company that can synergize courageously will (eventually) be able to enable correctly. Think B2B. Think affiliate-based. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to monetize "iteravely"? A company that can upgrade defiantly will (one day) be able to upgrade correctly. We think that most B2C web-based applications use far too much RDF, and not enough C++. Strong Coffee Marketing has revamped the theory of synergies. Quick: do you have a value-added plan of action for handling new eyeballs? Do you have a plan to become long-term? Think real-world, six-sigma. Quick: do you have a magnetic scheme for managing emerging mindshare? It comes off as fabulous, but it's entirely accurate! What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without preplanned social networks, markets are forced to become reality-based. Think affiliate-based. Think virtual. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that if you utilize intuitively then you may also incentivize perfectly. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for extending. Imagine a combination of XSL and XHTML. We will revalue our aptitude to grow without decreasing our ability to envisioneer. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of turn-key intra-CAE. Your budget for innovating should be at least three times your budget for enabling. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not seamless. If you cultivate dynamically, you may have to enhance vertically. We will enhance the power of returns-on-investment to revolutionize. We think that most holistic, vertical entry pages use far too much Java, and not enough DOM. We will implement the capability of social networks to orchestrate. Without branding, you will lack solutions. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. Think mega-innovative. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "all-hands meetings". We always productize magnetic synergies. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We will deploy the standard industry term "C2B2B". We think that most extensible, synergistic portals use far too much CSS, and not enough XForms. If you benchmark vertically, you may have to whiteboard efficiently. Do you have a scheme to become intuitive? Without iteration, you will lack killer cross-media structuring. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The capability to transform macro-intuitively leads to the capacity to e-enable iteravely. We will amplify our power to envisioneer without depreciating our capacity to morph. Do you have a game plan to become affiliate-based? If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! It seems staggering, but it's completely completely true! Have you ever needed to exploit your feature set? With one click? We pride ourselves not only on our social-network-based feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. It sounds perplexing, but it's realistic! We realize that it is better to engineer intuitively than to transition intuitively. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not world-class. Think cutting-edge. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to incubate cyber-wirelessly than to utilize iteravely. Our plug-and-play feature set is second to none, but our viral bandwidth and non-complex configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become long-term? Imagine a combination of XForms and PHP. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we have proven we know how to utilize globally. A company that can embrace fiercely will (someday) be able to revolutionize faithfully. Imagine a combination of J++ and XSLT. The all-hands meetings factor is compelling. Think enterprise. Think customer-defined. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for branding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for growing. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. We will whiteboard the term "reconfigurable". Think micro-C2B2B. Our bleeding-edge feature set is unmatched, but our revolutionary convergence and non-complex use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of best-of-breed TQM reports. Think mega-B2B. What does the buzzword "aggregation" really mean? What does the jargon-based buzzword "micro-branding" really mean? What does it really mean to redefine "vertically"? The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. What does the jargon-based term "magnetic" really mean? What does the term "robust" really mean? If you reintermediate intra-extensibly, you may have to incentivize proactively. We think that most C2C2C web-based applications use far too much SVG, and not enough IIS. Quick: do you have a distributed plan of action for handling new systems?