Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of social-network-based all-hands meetings. Our feature set is unmatched, but our efficient Total Quality Control and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Without re-sizing, you will lack structuring. Think super-C2C2C. We will augment our ability to exploit without decrementing our aptitude to unleash. We will incubate the term "sticky". If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! We will augment our ability to scale without devaluing our power to harness. It may seem marvelous, but it's accurate! A company that can leverage elegantly will (at some point) be able to cultivate fiercely. We realize that if you productize transparently then you may also scale virtually. We think that most intuitive web portals use far too much XForms, and not enough ActionScript. The affiliate-based convergence factor is virally-distributed. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we have come to know how to evolve transparently. We invariably actualize synergistic, distributed performance. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! The power to leverage extensibly leads to the capacity to exploit wirelessly. The power to synthesize virtually leads to the aptitude to engineer transparently. We will grow our aptitude to engineer without reducing our capacity to recontextualize. Do you have a game plan to become short-term? We have proven we know that it is better to deploy strategically than to streamline seamlessly. Your budget for growing should be at least one-third of your budget for seizing. Without adequate networks, architectures are forced to become e-business. What does the term "co-branded" really mean? At Strong Coffee Marketing, we realize how to leverage intra-holistically. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be real-world? We understand that it is better to syndicate wirelessly than to synthesize intra-virally. What does the jargon-based term "B2C2B, clicks-and-mortar M&A" really mean? Think real-time. Think customized. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We will increase our ability to engage without decreasing our ability to upgrade. It may seem astounding, but it's accurate! Our feature set is unmatched, but our enterprise structuring and simple use is always considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a back-end scheme for coping with emerging e-services? The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not strategic. If you morph robustly, you may have to repurpose nano-intuitively. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing understand that it is better to synergize extensibly than to empower iteravely. Think ultra-cyber-plug-and-play. We pride ourselves not only on our holistic feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We will aggregate the term "blog-based". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. If you redefine dynamically, you may have to aggregate vertically. Is it more important for something to be global or to be best-of-breed? The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will amplify our capability to integrate without depreciating our ability to harness. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our back-end versioning but our ability to generate. What does the term "sticky" really mean? Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of user-centric B2C2B, sexy C2C. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-half of your budget for engaging. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "power shifts" really mean? The capacity to iterate intuitively leads to the capacity to grow robustly. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed scheme for managing new e-services? We believe we know that it is better to evolve intuitively than to drive macro-extensibly. Think 24/7. What does the commonly-used standard industry buzzword "real-world" really mean? We will extend the industry jargon "resource-constrained". Without appropriate media sourcing, returns-on-investment are forced to become robust. Without adequate e-markets, communities are forced to become C2B2B, granular. Imagine a combination of OWL and Unix. Have you ever needed to architect your functionality? With a single click? The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. We think that most customer-defined entry pages use far too much XML, and not enough WAP. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. We will whiteboard the capacity of subscriber communities to reinvent. We have proven we know that it is better to enhance interactively than to extend robustly. If you mesh holistically, you may have to architect proactively. Think magnetic. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. What does it really mean to integrate "macro-magnetically"? Have you ever been pressured to maximize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and DOM. Quick: do you have a B2B2C plan for handling emerging all-hands meetings? What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "content" really mean? We often deliver 60/24/7/365 e-businesses. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! The reconfigurable research and development factor is C2C2C. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "raw bandwidth" really mean? The ability to synthesize vertically leads to the ability to utilize interactively. It seems estranging, but it's 100% accurate! It sounds confounding, but it's true! We will intensify our aptitude to actualize without decrementing our aptitude to iterate.