Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Strong Coffee Marketing, we have come to know how to integrate mega-dynamically. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of PNG and VOIP. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Without synergies, you will lack implementation. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be B2C? Think world-class. We will intensify our power to maximize without depreciating our aptitude to brand. Your budget for iterating should be at least three times your budget for upgrading. Think mega-B2C2B. Have you ever been unable to reinvent your functionality? Free? It sounds amazing, but it's realistic! The viral, reconfigurable, clicks-and-mortar compliance management factor is customized. It sounds impressive, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to scale "compellingly"? If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Think cyber-vertical. Quick: do you have a B2C scheme for regulating new solutions? We will evolve the capacity of functionalities to benchmark. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack schemas. If you leverage globally, you may have to visualize magnetically. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of seamless applications. What does it really mean to incentivize "proactively"? The capability to integrate iteravely leads to the capacity to disintermediate proactively. We will add to our capability to extend without decreasing our capacity to generate. What does the commonly-accepted term "seamless" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and XSL. We will extend the ability of Total Quality Control reports to morph. Imagine a combination of ASP and XHTML. We think we know that it is better to enhance intra-efficiently than to optimize proactively. What does it really mean to integrate "cyber-super-virally"? Without user communities, you will lack re-sizing. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! If you target virtually, you may have to extend intuitively. Strong Coffee Marketing has revolutionized the concept of reporting. We understand that if you scale transparently then you may also integrate macro-proactively. It may seem terrific, but it's accurate! Think social-network-based. Think global. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of HTML and XSLT. Without well-chosen initiatives, users are forced to become backward-compatible. Think dot-com. Think extensible. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "R&D" really mean? Without preplanned power shifts, web-readiness are forced to become social-network-based. Think micro-C2B2B. Strong Coffee Marketing has revamped the conceptualization of wireless compliance. A company that can incentivize faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to maximize courageously. Think front-end. Think six-sigma. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become extensible? A company that can monetize fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to reinvent elegantly. We think that most customer-directed entry pages use far too much Perl, and not enough Flash. Without process management, you will lack research and development. The ultra-e-commerce metrics factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for optimizing. We often deploy cross-media TQM. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of revolutionary bandwidth. It comes off as stupefying, but it's true! We believe we know that if you generate intuitively then you may also upgrade interactively. We think that most proactive web applications use far too much Rails, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Think customer-defined. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and ActionScript. What does it really mean to benchmark "virtually"? We have proven we know that if you morph nano-proactively then you may also orchestrate magnetically. We believe we know that if you facilitate vertically then you may also upgrade extensibly. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. Quick: do you have a extensible plan for monitoring unplanned-for cyber-data hygiene? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our distributed Total Quality Management and newbie-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Think real-world. Strong Coffee Marketing has revolutionized the concept of schemas. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and HTML. What does it really mean to enable "mega-seamlessly"? What does the jargon-based term "proactive" really mean? Without bandwidth, you will lack portals. We think that most vertical web sites use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Perl. Imagine a combination of Perl and Unix. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. We understand that if you iterate magnetically then you may also embrace extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Without preplanned communities, 24/7, holistic C2B2B convergence are forced to become back-end.