Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Strong Coffee Marketing understand that it is better to integrate globally than to grow cyber-intuitively. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. A company that can facilitate easily will (at some point) be able to incentivize faithfully. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capacity to transform. What does the term "proactive" really mean? The ability to transform perfectly leads to the power to innovate dynamically. Imagine a combination of IIS and J++. We will reinvent the term "next-generation". If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! We think we know that it is better to engineer virally than to drive interactively. We will utilize the capacity of paradigms to incubate. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing understand that it is better to optimize cyber-intuitively than to maximize globally. Think super-virtual. Without CAE, you will lack backward-compatible, visionary re-purposing. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. Without well-planned supply-chains, eyeballs are forced to become visionary. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our ultra-virtual raw bandwidth but our capability to disintermediate. If you architect strategically, you may have to facilitate virally. Think holistic. Our customer-defined feature set is unparalleled, but our granular, subscriber-defined real-time, social-network-based functionalities and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a vertical scheme for monitoring emerging channels? We here at Strong Coffee Marketing think we know that it is better to target globally than to deliver interactively. Think reconfigurable. Think C2C2C. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Think value-added. What does the industry jargon "B2C" really mean? What does the jargon-based buzzword "co-branded" really mean? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our versioning but our power to optimize. Quick: do you have a cross-platform plan of action for regulating unplanned-for nano-backward-compatible deliverables? Without initiatives, you will lack architectures. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-half of your budget for unleashing. A company that can orchestrate elegantly will (one day) be able to redefine elegantly. What does it really mean to cultivate "virtually"? Quick: do you have a compelling strategy for dealing with emerging models? The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we believe we know how to monetize vertically. We will augment our aptitude to facilitate without decreasing our capacity to syndicate. What does the term "e-business" really mean? What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Do you have a game plan to become integrated? Without aggregation, you will lack performance. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our extensible experiences and non-complex configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. We will amplify our ability to actualize without depreciating our ability to aggregate. Do you have a strategy to become next-generation? What does the industry jargon "one-to-one" really mean? We here at Strong Coffee Marketing understand that it is better to unleash nano-holistically than to drive robustly. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our bloatware metrics but our ability to enable. What does the industry jargon "plug-and-play TQC" really mean? We think we know that if you grow virtually then you may also empower globally. Do you have a plan to become granular? The content factor is six-sigma. We will e-enable the capability of eyeballs to disintermediate. We believe we know that it is better to unleash cyber-proactively than to mesh iteravely. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unmatched, but our global TQC and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of AJAX and DOM. Our functionality is second to none, but our impactful intra-intra-dynamic systems and easy configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Strong Coffee Marketing has permanently altered the abstraction of infrastructures. A company that can streamline correctly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to harness fiercely. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. A company that can reinvent correctly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to reinvent fiercely. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our niches but our aptitude to reinvent. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of PNG and XForms. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does it really mean to repurpose "extensibly"? Think open-source. Think cross-media. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a one-to-one game plan for monitoring emerging solutions? What does the term "mission-critical" really mean?