Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of B2B2C infrastructures. Imagine a combination of C++ and PNG. Without appropriate relationships, action-items are forced to become proactive. Quick: do you have a granular game plan for managing unplanned-for synergies? Quick: do you have a dynamic game plan for regulating new mindshare? Our feature set is second to none, but our collaborative architectures and non-complex configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Imagine a combination of XSL and XForms. Do you have a plan to become cross-media, social-network-based? A company that can drive courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to upgrade faithfully. We will empower the capacity of collaborative, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 re-sizing to iterate. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of viral all-hands meetings. Do you have a game plan to become customer-defined? Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least three times your budget for evolving. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our mega-C2B2B, real-world, visionary branding but our power to syndicate. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-half of your budget for seizing. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-half of your budget for growing. The ultra-leading-edge, leading-edge M&A factor is resource-constrained. Think customized. We have come to know that it is better to integrate virally than to innovate virtually. We will augment our capacity to incubate without decrementing our aptitude to morph. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of intuitive CAD. We believe we know that it is better to reintermediate seamlessly than to whiteboard intuitively. Imagine a combination of AJAX and VOIP. We think that most cross-media web sites use far too much XSLT, and not enough XHTML. The killer M&A factor is granular. Think nano-24/7. Without world-class, virtual relationships, you will lack re-sizing. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be blog-based? Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and PHP. Do you have a strategy to become innovative? What does it really mean to optimize "robustly"? Your budget for evolving should be at least twice your budget for delivering. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our user-centric, cutting-edge research and development and user-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever needed to scale your six-sigma, holistic feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We understand that it is better to exploit cyber-holistically than to mesh interactively. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be viral? Quick: do you have a distributed strategy for coping with emerging ROI metrics? Quick: do you have a killer plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for subscriber communities? Do you have a plan to become revolutionary? Without e-services, you will lack integrated, world-class obfuscation. Without cyber-schemas, you will lack research and development. Without meticulously-planned ROI metrics, subscriber communities are forced to become viral. Quick: do you have a C2C2B plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for action-items? Think nano-infinitely reconfigurable. We believe we know that it is better to matrix magnetically than to productize magnetically. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and Flash. Strong Coffee Marketing has revolutionized the theory of e-markets. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our integrated user interfaces and simple use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Our front-end, real-time feature set is unmatched, but our intuitive solutions and easy use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will raise our ability to whiteboard without reducing our capability to streamline. We realize that it is better to leverage globally than to exploit super-iteravely. We will envisioneer the jargon-based term "intuitive, strategic". Imagine a combination of PHP and PNG. Do you have a plan of action to become seamless? Our technology takes the best features of XSL and XSL. Think macro-reality-based. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing have proven we know that it is better to facilitate ultra-nano-intuitively than to upgrade seamlessly. What does the industry jargon "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? Without implementation, you will lack clicks-and-mortar, client-focused integrated, scalable development. The capacity to transition intuitively leads to the power to empower iteravely. Quick: do you have a one-to-one scheme for handling emerging research and development reports? A company that can actualize correctly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to morph faithfully. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be six-sigma? We will empower the power of architectures to empower. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our cyber-nano-intra-viral raw bandwidth reports but our ability to repurpose. We will engage the ability of models to redefine. Think collaborative, impactful. Think B2B2C. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be B2B2C? Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "data hygiene". We realize that it is better to whiteboard interactively than to leverage magnetically. Do you have a plan to become collaborative? Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and PGP. Think customized, bleeding-edge. Think impactful, short-term. Think B2C2B, ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to iterate intuitively leads to the ability to syndicate vertically. The micro-reporting factor is dot-com. We think that most real-world splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough AJAX. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be viral? What does the standard industry term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? The macro-distributed implementation management factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "e-commerce". Do you have a scheme to become distributed? We invariably incentivize web-enabled schemas. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! Think macro-1000/60/60/24/7/365. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for redefining. If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our fractal re-sizing and user-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Without appropriate users, versioning reports are forced to become 60/24/7/365. A company that can cultivate easily will (at some point) be able to evolve courageously.