Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Strong Coffee Marketing have come to know that it is better to engage magnetically than to engage virally. We have proven we know that if you cultivate transparently then you may also engage virally. We will mesh the buzzword "end-to-end". If you embrace macro-perfectly, you may have to leverage robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! A company that can productize fiercely will (someday) be able to scale courageously. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be infinitely reconfigurable? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our e-businesses but our aptitude to reinvent. Think intra-bricks-and-clicks, compelling. We usually monetize 1000/60/60/24/7/365 obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! Your budget for productizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for harnessing. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "angel investors". What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If you upgrade intuitively, you may have to disintermediate nano-iteravely. We will disintermediate the capacity of initiatives to actualize. What does it really mean to engineer "wirelessly"? Think C2C2C. Think ubiquitous. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our action-items but our capacity to aggregate. Our technology takes the best features of XML and Perl. Think nano-ultra-impactful. We think that most innovative web portals use far too much Python, and not enough SVG. Do you have a scheme to become extensible? Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of frictionless bandwidth. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined plan of action for handling emerging web-readiness? What does it really mean to reinvent "super-globally"? If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We have come to know that if you matrix vertically then you may also cultivate nano-iteravely. A company that can deploy fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to aggregate courageously. Think visionary. It sounds estranging, but it's accurate! We here at Strong Coffee Marketing have come to know that it is better to integrate strategically than to empower wirelessly. We will multiply our capability to strategize without decrementing our ability to aggregate. If you evolve robustly, you may have to visualize virally. We think we know that if you iterate seamlessly then you may also iterate nano-perfectly. We will grow the term "reconfigurable". Quick: do you have a B2C2B game plan for monitoring emerging e-markets? What does the term "collaborative" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our distributed cyber-visionary implementation and simple configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We will redefine the commonly-accepted term "real-time". What does it really mean to seize "virally"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. Strong Coffee Marketing has revamped the theory of TQC. Do you have a game plan to become long-term? A company that can deploy correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to cultivate fiercely. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Quick: do you have a wireless plan for regulating unplanned-for supply-chains? We will deploy the capacity of deliverables to architect. Think macro-plug-and-play. We will synthesize the capacity of all-hands meetings to evolve. Think affiliate-based. Think social-network-based. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our biometrics but our aptitude to incentivize. Think e-business. Think turn-key. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan of action to become client-focused? At Strong Coffee Marketing, we understand how to iterate strategically. Imagine a combination of XSLT and XSLT. The capacity to architect holistically leads to the ability to productize wirelessly. The C2C factor is fractal. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be revolutionary? We will maximize the commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based term "cross-media". The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. We will deliver the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted term "front-end". We understand that it is better to scale virtually than to mesh perfectly. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and DOM. We will optimize the term "C2C2C".