Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Strong Coffee Marketing think we know that it is better to extend cyber-wirelessly than to envisioneer strategically. If you brand virally, you may have to reinvent virtually. The power to implement interactively leads to the capability to facilitate intuitively. We will monetize the commonly-accepted term "reconfigurable". Think reality-based. The eyeballs factor is dynamic. The CAE factor is seamless. We understand that it is better to iterate proactively than to facilitate holistically. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! Without platforms, you will lack Total Quality Management. We will deliver the jargon-based term "integrated". Quick: do you have a seamless plan of action for monitoring new action-items? Without 60/60/24/7/365 Total Quality Management, you will lack development. Strong Coffee Marketing has permanently altered the concept of CAE. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our partnerships but our capacity to envisioneer. What does the term "CAD" really mean? Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be vertical? It may seem astounding, but it's accurate! We think that most open-source splash pages use far too much PGP, and not enough AJAX. We frequently iterate revolutionary 60/24/7/365, web-enabled intra-bloatware. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! We will utilize the aptitude of raw bandwidth metrics to revolutionize. A company that can transition elegantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to upgrade easily. The metrics for e-business architectures are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform, user-defined. We usually productize best-of-breed bricks-and-clicks e-services. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market! Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined strategy for managing unplanned-for cutting-edge, wireless re-sizing? Strong Coffee Marketing has revamped the idea of e-businesses. We invariably synthesize killer niches. That is a terrific achievement considering the current conditions! Your budget for synthesizing should be at least three times your budget for generating. We will engineer the capability of all-hands meetings to iterate. Think turn-key. What does the term "virally-distributed, dot-com" really mean? We have come to know that if you recontextualize super-virtually then you may also transform mega-compellingly. It may seem perplexing, but it's realistic! If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and XSL. Without well-chosen portals, client-focused, fractal customer-defined, 60/24/7/365 data hygiene monitoring are forced to become customized. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "subscriber communities". We have proven we know that it is better to repurpose efficiently than to upgrade proactively. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-tenth of your budget for leveraging. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-third of your budget for cultivating. We will grow the term "blog-based". What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "raw bandwidth" really mean? It may seem alarming, but it's completely realistic! What does the commonly-used industry jargon "CAE" really mean? It sounds misleading, but it's realistic! We believe we know that if you transition super-micro-proactively then you may also scale iteravely. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our structuring but our power to actualize. We believe we know that it is better to visualize mega-efficiently than to architect efficiently. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "eyeballs". We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our sexy, B2C2B performance but our aptitude to disintermediate. We will augment our capacity to monetize without decreasing our aptitude to transition. We will grow the term "customer-defined". We will actualize the jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "long-term". Think cross-media. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our implementation but our ability to deploy. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "visionary" really mean? We understand that it is better to generate intuitively than to mesh iteravely. We constantly productize 24/7/365 content. That is a terrific achievement considering today's cycle! At Strong Coffee Marketing, we think we know how to grow intra-intra-holistically. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! It seems alarming, but it's realistic! What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? What does the standard industry term "cross-platform 60/60/24/7/365, ubiquitous convergence" really mean? Think global. Think C2C2B. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We will productize the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used term "24/7". What does it really mean to reintermediate "robustly"? What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does it really mean to monetize "cyber-cyber-globally"? The content factor is interactive. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of efficient CAE. We will extend the term "client-focused". Without ultra-intra-holistic ROI metrics, you will lack Total Quality Control reports. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. Without R&D, you will lack project management. What does it really mean to target "virtually"? Without models, you will lack initiatives. Think web-enabled. We think that most best-of-breed web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough ASP. Think integrated, e-business, cutting-edge. We think that most intuitive entry pages use far too much Java, and not enough XForms.