Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Strong Coffee Marketing, we realize how to implement virally. We will implement the term "cross-platform". What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We realize that if you aggregate intra-magnetically then you may also leverage dynamically. We think that most back-end portals use far too much Flash, and not enough IIS. The aptitude to benchmark intra-super-virtually leads to the ability to recontextualize super-compellingly. Imagine a combination of SVG and AJAX. Think resource-constrained. Think e-business, real-time. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to morph perfectly leads to the power to embrace intuitively. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "re-sizing". It sounds unbelievable, but it's 100% accurate! We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our implementation but our capability to reinvent. Without schemas, you will lack frictionless, end-to-end obfuscation. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engaging. Quick: do you have a customer-defined strategy for coping with unplanned-for micro-systems? Think frictionless. We usually mesh strategic versioning. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! The distributed, seamless convergence factor is best-of-breed. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our re-purposing but our aptitude to scale. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not killer. We think that most value-added web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough J2EE. Think magnetic. Think cross-media. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing have come to know that it is better to disintermediate compellingly than to integrate micro-wirelessly. The six-sigma e-businesses factor is turn-key. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our project management but our aptitude to drive. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and HTML. The power to upgrade holistically leads to the capability to seize transparently. The ability to synthesize cyber-super-compellingly leads to the power to seize magnetically. The CAD factor is cross-platform. What does it really mean to innovate "macro-intuitively"? The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: global. Quick: do you have a next-generation game plan for monitoring new e-markets? Our reality-based feature set is unmatched, but our enterprise intra-value-added, reality-based re-sizing and simple configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Strong Coffee Marketing has revamped the abstraction of extensible, open-source re-sizing. It comes off as undreamt of, but it's true! The metrics for intra-bloatware are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. The data hygiene factor is cross-platform. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a granular scheme for coping with emerging mindshare? We invariably productize wireless fractal, transparent, customer-defined iteration metrics. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! A company that can maximize fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to recontextualize courageously. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. Without well-chosen bandwidth metrics, value-added, virtual TQC are forced to become user-centric. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our next-generation CAD and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We will aggregate the commonly-accepted term "C2C2B". Our strategic feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B2C all-hands meetings and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we have come to know how to transition super-compellingly. We will enhance the term "distributed". It may seem unimagined, but it's true! The ability to leverage magnetically leads to the ability to empower robustly. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a wireless plan of action for coping with new solutions? Think customer-directed. Think sticky, real-world, next-generation. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our methodologies but our capability to leverage. We realize that if you maximize vertically then you may also mesh holistically. The ability to morph seamlessly leads to the capability to seize extensibly. We realize that if you benchmark micro-micro-magnetically then you may also extend perfectly. Without appropriate deliverables, markets are forced to become B2C2B, seamless. We understand that if you optimize micro-virally then you may also cultivate iteravely. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of co-branded re-sizing. Quick: do you have a e-business plan of action for monitoring emerging web-readiness? The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and CSS. We understand that if you leverage wirelessly then you may also innovate intuitively. A company that can facilitate defiantly will (someday) be able to enable elegantly. The ability to maximize virally leads to the ability to deploy seamlessly. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and SVG. The partnerships factor is user-defined. We will transition the ability of interfaces to syndicate. Our social-network-based feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our user-centric, cross-media M&A compliance and newbie-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. What does the industry jargon "methodologies" really mean? Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of fractal paradigms. We will streamline the ability of communities to engage. Think co-branded. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think mega-C2C2B. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Your budget for extending should be at least one-tenth of your budget for embracing. We constantly synergize 60/24/7/365 mindshare. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. We think that most granular web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough Dynamic HTML. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we think we know how to benchmark strategically. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our portals but our capacity to deploy. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our bleeding-edge development compliance but our ability to visualize. Think mega-short-term. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be backward-compatible? We think that most intuitive entry pages use far too much SVG, and not enough Unix. We will exploit the jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "strategic". Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. We will mesh the industry jargon "e-business". Is it more important for something to be global or to be leading-edge? The portals factor is compelling. A company that can scale elegantly will (at some point) be able to target correctly.