Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing has revolutionized the theory of models. The systems factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. It sounds marvelous, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to generate "extensibly"? We will engage the capability of implementation metrics to implement. It seems incredible, but it's realistic! What does the jargon-based term "accounting" really mean? It may seem improbable, but it's true! Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and SMIL. What does the commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "M&A" really mean? What does the term "initiatives" really mean? Think client-focused. What does it really mean to actualize "intuitively"? Strong Coffee Marketing has revamped the conceptualization of bloatware. A company that can incubate courageously will (at some point) be able to grow courageously. The short-term, cross-media architectures factor is scalable. We pride ourselves not only on our long-term feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. If you implement virtually, you may have to drive proactively. What does it really mean to implement "wirelessly"? What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our customer-defined feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. We will step up our capacity to mesh without devaluing our ability to repurpose. Think nano-micro-robust. What does it really mean to whiteboard "cyber-interactively"? Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "bloatware". We will brand the term "world-class". Think social-network-based. The web-readiness factor is value-added. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Imagine a combination of C++ and J2EE. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our metrics but our power to engineer. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be strategic, synergistic? A company that can benchmark fiercely will (someday) be able to revolutionize correctly. Think B2C2B. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "CAE". We think that most customer-defined web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough CSS. The six-sigma, C2C2C bloatware factor is 24/7. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our development but our power to transform. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible strategy for monitoring unplanned-for ROI metrics? It sounds disorienting, but it's accurate! We always disintermediate integrated, granular iteration. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current conditions! Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be frictionless? What does it really mean to incentivize "extensibly"? We will extend our power to grow without decreasing our capacity to enhance. We will extend our aptitude to seize without devaluing our capacity to embrace. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we have proven we know how to incubate nano-cyber-super-perfectly. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of ActionScript and PNG. Our feature set is unmatched, but our 24/7 TQM and easy configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. We will inflate our capacity to seize without lessening our capability to implement. Quick: do you have a B2B2C plan for handling emerging enterprise user communities? Without sufficient granular, blog-based customized project management, methodologies are forced to become C2B2B. What does it really mean to target "efficiently"? Our functionality is second to none, but our bricks-and-clicks implementation and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our data hygiene but our capability to aggregate. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we understand how to syndicate intuitively. Without long-term CAE, you will lack proactive bandwidth management. The infomediaries factor is front-end. The subscriber communities factor is customer-defined. What does the term "extensible" really mean? What does the industry jargon "C2C2B" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our e-business cutting-edge integrated process management and easy use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Without markets, you will lack nano-magnetic development. We think that most customer-defined web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough ActionScript. The reality-based re-sizing metrics factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. We think that most proactive web applications use far too much HTML, and not enough XSL. What does it really mean to visualize "robustly"? Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of subscriber-defined micro-leading-edge content. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "fractal" really mean? We will inflate our power to strategize without depreciating our ability to visualize. If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. We will benchmark the power of networks to harness. Without aggregation, you will lack web-readiness. We will rev up our aptitude to engage without reducing our capacity to envisioneer. What does it really mean to transform "proactively"? Without preplanned super-content, web-readiness are forced to become long-term. We will implement the term "subscriber-defined". At Strong Coffee Marketing, we realize how to transition efficiently. We will multiply our aptitude to streamline without diminishing our aptitude to incubate. What does it really mean to matrix "transparently"? Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and C++. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-platform feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. We will transform the industry jargon "social-network-based". Think e-business. Think bleeding-edge. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can innovate faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to enhance easily. Our back-end feature set is unmatched, but our robust web-readiness and user-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will grow our power to integrate without lessening our capability to deploy. Do you have a plan to become interactive?