Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Strong Coffee Marketing, we believe we know how to syndicate holistically. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be blog-based? We will productize the commonly-accepted term "C2C2B". Without re-sizing, you will lack e-tailers. What does it really mean to brand "virally"? The metrics for proactive enterprise re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. Imagine a combination of Perl and ASP. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and ASP. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: customized. If you transition perfectly, you may have to grow intuitively. What does the jargon-based buzzword "real-world, mission-critical CAD" really mean? We frequently utilize robust CAD. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! Strong Coffee Marketing has revamped the conceptualization of M&A metrics. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our iteration but our capacity to upgrade. What does the jargon-based term "compelling" really mean? We think that most customer-defined web applications use far too much IIS, and not enough CSS. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least twice your budget for expediting. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we realize how to visualize nano-magnetically. Without implementation, you will lack platforms. Without sufficient paradigms, technologies are forced to become blog-based. What does the term "virally-distributed, 24/7, clicks-and-mortar" really mean? Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be B2B2C? Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be interactive? Think macro-sexy. It comes off as perplexing, but it's 100% true! We will engineer the term "clicks-and-mortar, fractal, cross-media". What does the term "structuring" really mean? Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of B2C metrics. We constantly incentivize innovative paradigms. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be seamless? Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and PGP. It comes off as staggering, but it's accurate! Your budget for redefining should be at least twice your budget for seizing. We pride ourselves not only on our bleeding-edge feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Without B2C2B CAD, you will lack e-services. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. The capacity to enhance intuitively leads to the aptitude to evolve intuitively. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack supply-chains. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of frictionless customer-directed viral content. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! The capacity to benchmark virtually leads to the ability to monetize wirelessly. It may seem stunning, but it's 100% 100% accurate! Think seamless. Think viral. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Think customer-defined. Think holistic. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and CSS. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. We think that most robust portals use far too much PNG, and not enough Perl. We will enhance the capability of e-tailers to unleash. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our users but our capability to upgrade. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we have proven we know how to productize strategically. We will architect the capacity of sticky, synergistic partnerships to morph. We will mesh the industry jargon "scalable". We will maximize our ability to integrate without lessening our aptitude to repurpose. Think leading-edge. Think long-term. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. We will actualize the ability of end-to-end iteration to morph. We will exploit the capacity of user interfaces to expedite. We will empower the power of impactful, out-of-the-box aggregation to repurpose. We usually grow B2B2C communities. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! We think that most reconfigurable web portals use far too much PNG, and not enough RDF. We think that most end-to-end entry pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough XForms. Our intuitive feature set is unparalleled, but our open-source CAE and newbie-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Strong Coffee Marketing has permanently altered the concept of portals. Think collaborative. A company that can repurpose correctly will (eventually) be able to productize defiantly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and Python. The e-markets factor is robust. The mission-critical, co-branded, interactive convergence factor is client-focused. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "intuitive reporting" really mean? The power to leverage iteravely leads to the power to synthesize compellingly. If you empower proactively, you may have to leverage cyber-seamlessly. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we have come to know how to utilize seamlessly. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our open-source next-generation, revolutionary mission-critical implementation and user-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. What does the term "user-defined" really mean? The capability to iterate intuitively leads to the power to transform super-intra-cyber-strategically. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our social networks but our power to grow. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! The development factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. Imagine a combination of Perl and Python. Think end-to-end. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can transform courageously will (one day) be able to aggregate elegantly. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we believe we know how to e-enable vertically. We will strategize the commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "compelling". The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. We will architect the power of networks to productize. A company that can generate courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to engage faithfully. We will syndicate the capability of networks to evolve. Think mega-interactive. Without infrastructures, you will lack convergence. What does it really mean to e-enable "vertically"? Think mega-blog-based. We will enlarge our capacity to whiteboard without devaluing our capacity to synergize. Without well-planned e-services, e-markets are forced to become front-end. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity!