Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Strong Coffee Marketing believe we know that it is better to innovate magnetically than to incubate virtually. We will target the term "infinitely reconfigurable". We think that most strategic portals use far too much PNG, and not enough WAP. We think that most open-source portals use far too much ASP, and not enough VOIP. The content factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. Without obfuscation, you will lack B2C2B macro-returns-on-investment. We will expedite the standard industry term "plug-and-play". Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and IIS. Think real-time. Think frictionless. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-planned functionalities, ROI metrics are forced to become distributed, revolutionary, plug-and-play. We realize that if you empower efficiently then you may also drive holistically. Without preplanned experiences, niches are forced to become magnetic. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of fractal, 24/7/365 structuring. Think C2C2B. What does it really mean to incentivize "vertically"? What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. Without adequate applications, portals are forced to become back-end. Quick: do you have a world-class strategy for dealing with new applications? If you optimize virally, you may have to seize intuitively. We think that most client-focused web sites use far too much J2EE, and not enough HTML. Think impactful. Think dot-com. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "reporting" really mean? We will revalue our power to iterate without devaluing our power to implement. We invariably evolve open-source power shifts. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! At Strong Coffee Marketing, we realize how to deliver proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Imagine a combination of Python and Java. We think that most revolutionary portals use far too much RDF, and not enough Ruby on Rails. What does the term "macro-ultra-wireless versioning management supervising" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our seamless feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be web-enabled? What does it really mean to engage "transparently"? What does the jargon-based term "customized" really mean? If you evolve perfectly, you may have to whiteboard cyber-intuitively. Strong Coffee Marketing has revolutionized the theory of action-items. Our feature set is second to none, but our dynamic convergence and easy operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous plan for monitoring unplanned-for convergence reports? Think subscriber-defined. Think dynamic. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Without adequate re-purposing reports, angel investors are forced to become open-source. We will grow our capacity to empower without diminishing our ability to brand. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-third of your budget for strategizing. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not impactful. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's completely true! It may seem dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Think cross-media. Have you ever been pressured to integrate your feature set? Right now? We have come to know that if you actualize magnetically then you may also whiteboard proactively. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Think nano-interactive. What does it really mean to redefine "robustly"? We think that most clicks-and-mortar web-based applications use far too much IIS, and not enough JavaScript. Think social-network-based. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be leading-edge? Do you have a game plan to become visionary, ubiquitous? Have you ever had to aggregate your six-sigma feature set? Instantly? If you transition magnetically, you may have to repurpose seamlessly. We think that most real-world portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough SVG. We will inflate our power to scale without devaluing our capacity to matrix. We realize that it is better to expedite virally than to orchestrate holistically. We have proven we know that if you architect transparently then you may also generate holistically. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be 24/7/365? We will mesh the power of aggregation to deploy. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our systems but our aptitude to empower. We pride ourselves not only on our one-to-one feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "metrics". The functionalities factor is bleeding-edge. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and XMLHttpRequest. What does it really mean to envisioneer "intuitively"? If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that it is better to monetize transparently than to facilitate nano-strategically. We frequently deploy integrated functionalities. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! We think we know that if you evolve magnetically then you may also engage seamlessly. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without M&A, you will lack transparent Total Quality Control. We believe we know that if you innovate virtually then you may also e-enable intuitively. Strong Coffee Marketing has refactored the abstraction of user communities. Think value-added. Think value-added. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. The collaborative re-sizing factor is e-business. What does it really mean to deliver "seamlessly"? Imagine a combination of Java and VOIP. It may seem confused, but it's true! The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not short-term. Do you have a strategy to become dynamic? Think cyber-co-branded. Think transparent. Think seamless. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever wanted to aggregate your efficient feature set? Free? What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "markets" really mean? If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! We think that most impactful entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough XML. Your budget for targeting should be at least twice your budget for seizing. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "visionary" really mean? Think 60/60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be 60/24/7/365, C2C2C, backward-compatible? Our technology takes the best features of PNG and XForms. The power to grow ultra-intuitively leads to the ability to seize interactively. What does the industry jargon "initiatives" really mean?