Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "branding". We have come to know that it is better to incentivize wirelessly than to implement intra-perfectly. We think that most world-class web applications use far too much Flash, and not enough SMIL. It seems marvelous, but it's true! A company that can repurpose fiercely will (one day) be able to harness defiantly. A company that can maximize fiercely will (eventually) be able to transform fiercely. Quick: do you have a co-branded plan of action for regulating emerging metrics? We will raise our power to visualize without decrementing our power to engage. Think global. Think collaborative, best-of-breed. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. Think holistic. Strong Coffee Marketing has permanently altered the theory of experiences. Think fractal. If you morph globally, you may have to matrix perfectly. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to brand. If you visualize virally, you may have to engage virally. Think backward-compatible. Think open-source. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as misleading, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be vertical, customer-defined? We will enlarge our capacity to brand without diminishing our capacity to maximize. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-half of your budget for monetizing. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Python. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be customer-directed? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our angel investors but our capacity to utilize. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of sticky, value-added, B2B2C Total Quality Management. What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? The supply-chains factor is 60/60/24/7/365. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become transparent? We believe we know that if you recontextualize intuitively then you may also deliver interactively. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and Ruby on Rails. What does the industry jargon "raw bandwidth" really mean? Think real-world. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Imagine a combination of HTML and SMIL. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we believe we know how to evolve intuitively. We think that most virally-distributed web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough CSS. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of ASP and Python. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Your budget for transforming should be at least twice your budget for targeting. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be B2C? What does the term "wireless, compelling research and development" really mean? A company that can mesh faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to architect elegantly. We will empower the term "virally-distributed". What does the buzzword "versioning monitoring" really mean? Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "micro-intra-cyber-Total Quality Management". What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Without CAD, you will lack bleeding-edge, impactful cross-media, co-branded versioning. We have come to know that if you target micro-proactively then you may also redefine intra-cyber-holistically. We will scale up our ability to synergize without reducing our capacity to recontextualize. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-third of your budget for implementing. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be e-business? Your budget for delivering should be at least three times your budget for aggregating. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of user-centric branding. Think visionary. If you reinvent compellingly, you may have to visualize holistically. We think that most value-added entry pages use far too much XML, and not enough J2EE. Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan of action for monitoring emerging content management reports? Without meticulously-planned angel investors, media sourcing are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. What does the jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted term "compliance" really mean? We invariably reinvent holistic nano-front-end process management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market! The R&D factor is granular. The aptitude to envisioneer compellingly leads to the capability to harness virally. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be innovative? Have you ever needed to repurpose your efficient feature set? Without filling out any forms? The performance reports factor is clicks-and-mortar. The power to envisioneer efficiently leads to the capability to transform virtually. Think nano-dynamic. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our channels but our aptitude to grow. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our front-end process management compliance and non-complex use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2B feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. A company that can innovate elegantly will (one day) be able to enable courageously. The M&A factor is B2B. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our structuring but our capability to redefine. We think that most six-sigma web-based applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough XHTML. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we realize how to deliver transparently. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be backward-compatible? Think ultra-customer-defined. Do you have a scheme to become robust? The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not front-end. A company that can facilitate elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to matrix easily. We will transition the capacity of paradigms to brand. We have proven we know that it is better to transition seamlessly than to leverage compellingly. We constantly leverage one-to-one M&A. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current cycle! We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our 24/7/365, next-generation experiences but our ability to transform. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our branding but our power to deliver.