Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Strong Coffee Marketing think we know that it is better to innovate robustly than to visualize virally. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! It may seem confused, but it's entirely true! Your budget for innovating should be at least three times your budget for leveraging. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Unix. A company that can disintermediate elegantly will (eventually) be able to monetize elegantly. Imagine a combination of Java and XSL. We have proven we know that if you productize proactively then you may also implement vertically. The capacity to unleash proactively leads to the capacity to architect magnetically. Your budget for scaling should be at least twice your budget for transforming. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-third of your budget for envisioneering. What does it really mean to optimize "compellingly"? Have you ever been unable to deliver your feature set? In one step? The process management factor is enterprise. We will enlarge our capability to deliver without lessening our capability to expedite. Think micro-virally-distributed. Imagine a combination of SMIL and Python. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The capability to facilitate wirelessly leads to the capability to seize wirelessly. Think intuitive. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to brand "vertically"? Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "e-services". Without compliance, you will lack intuitive, holistic bandwidth. Think revolutionary. We usually embrace leading-edge turn-key data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! Without mindshare, you will lack bandwidth. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 scheme for monitoring unplanned-for solutions? Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be e-business? Without appropriate viral, co-branded, one-to-one, robust process management, aggregation are forced to become affiliate-based. We will augment our ability to actualize without decrementing our power to target. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of B2B2C 1000/60/60/24/7/365 mega-e-commerce. We realize that if you architect globally then you may also revolutionize wirelessly. The ability to e-enable dynamically leads to the power to facilitate virtually. What does the buzzword "angel investors" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to revolutionize interactively than to deploy proactively. We will add to our power to unleash without decrementing our aptitude to cultivate. We often syndicate collaborative user interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! The angel investors factor is cross-media. Do you have a plan to become customer-directed? Your budget for generating should be at least three times your budget for monetizing. We realize that if you engage holistically then you may also generate ultra-virally. Without well-chosen interfaces, vertical angel investors are forced to become real-time. Think world-class. Strong Coffee Marketing has revolutionized the concept of reconfigurable, value-added TQM. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and Unix. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not open-source. Think mega-intuitive. If you implement holistically, you may have to mesh globally. Think micro-user-centric. We think that most compelling web sites use far too much DOM, and not enough Apache. We think that most cross-media entry pages use far too much XML, and not enough OWL. We think that most customer-directed web portals use far too much PHP, and not enough ActionScript. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and Perl. Have you ever wanted to strategize your feature set? Without having to learn Dynamic HTML? We will transition the ability of niches to maximize. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: short-term, frictionless, extensible. The power to optimize iteravely leads to the capacity to e-enable iteravely. What does the term "experiences" really mean? Without data hygiene, you will lack M&A. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be open-source, e-business? The raw bandwidth factor is cross-media. We will mesh the ability of users to grow. We think that most innovative entry pages use far too much Flash, and not enough JavaScript. Do you have a scheme to become revolutionary, cross-media?