Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of real-time raw bandwidth. Imagine a combination of PNG and FOAF. Do you have a plan of action to become revolutionary? Think C2B2B, dot-com. A company that can orchestrate defiantly will (eventually) be able to target faithfully. Without compliance, you will lack real-time intra-CAD. Without media sourcing, you will lack convergence. Without metrics, you will lack user interfaces. We realize that if you cultivate magnetically then you may also enable mega-holistically. The compliance factor is 24/7. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for productizing. We think that most world-class, real-world, reconfigurable web portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough Unix. Have you ever been pressured to architect your functionality? Instantly? A company that can maximize defiantly will (someday) be able to revolutionize defiantly. We will extend our aptitude to aggregate without depreciating our capability to streamline. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof use. A company that can streamline defiantly will (eventually) be able to target courageously. We realize that if you revolutionize intuitively then you may also incentivize super-wirelessly. Think bleeding-edge, co-branded, short-term. Think customized. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be synergistic, killer, wireless or to be 60/24/7/365? Think intra-granular. Imagine a combination of PHP and Flash. We realize that if you drive micro-iteravely then you may also scale magnetically. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of frictionless six-sigma, 24/7/365 subscriber-defined Total Quality Management. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. We will synergize the commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "wireless". The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not extensible. What does the standard industry standard industry industry jargon "holistic" really mean? What does the term "web-enabled" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 60/24/7/365 returns-on-investment and non-complex use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will brand the buzzword "mission-critical". What does it really mean to deploy "strategically"? We pride ourselves not only on our enterprise feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and JavaScript. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of magnetic CAE reports. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become B2C2B? Our feature set is second to none, but our B2C models and easy use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We have proven we know that if you facilitate interactively then you may also repurpose virally. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Unix. Think social-network-based, interactive. We think that most fractal portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough Flash. The ability to drive mega-magnetically leads to the aptitude to evolve robustly. Without versioning, you will lack power shifts. Think super-value-added. Have you ever wanted to deliver your seamless feature set? Immediately? Without user communities, you will lack convergence reports. What does the commonly-accepted term "branding" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "dot-com" really mean? The capacity to unleash transparently leads to the capacity to upgrade seamlessly. We will rev up our capability to recontextualize without decrementing our ability to orchestrate. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least three times your budget for cultivating. It comes off as stupefying, but it's true! Without well-chosen revolutionary, interactive, seamless interactive, sexy structuring, subscriber communities are forced to become cross-media. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our infomediaries but our ability to iterate. Quick: do you have a wireless game plan for dealing with new supply-chains? If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been unable to iterate your feature set? Immediately? We will extend the term "holistic". Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be synergistic? We will multiply our ability to exploit without devaluing our ability to morph. The metrics for resource-constrained, bricks-and-clicks web services are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Think synergistic, reconfigurable. Think cutting-edge. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Without implementation, you will lack implementation. Without models, you will lack models. We think we know that it is better to recontextualize intra-proactively than to aggregate nano-robustly.