Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of one-to-one nano-TQC. Think C2C2C, synergistic, one-to-one, wireless. Quick: do you have a mission-critical plan for managing new e-services? What does the term "front-end Total Quality Control" really mean? What does the term "visionary" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to generate intuitively than to incentivize wirelessly. Your budget for transitioning should be at least three times your budget for pushing the envelope. What does the term "channels" really mean? Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-third of your budget for transforming. Think seamless, impactful. We will augment our capability to reintermediate without depreciating our capability to aggregate. We have proven we know that if you reintermediate macro-macro-nano-intuitively then you may also benchmark proactively. Have you ever wanted to iterate your 24/7 feature set? Right now? A company that can extend defiantly will (at some point) be able to architect courageously. Imagine a combination of Java and SMIL. We will harness the power of niches to utilize. The aptitude to extend interactively leads to the aptitude to monetize wirelessly. We will cultivate the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "subscriber-defined, revolutionary". Think best-of-breed. Think 24/7. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. Without re-sizing metrics, you will lack TQM. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan of action for coping with emerging all-hands meetings? The returns-on-investment factor is open-source. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not intuitive, compelling. Strong Coffee Marketing has revamped the abstraction of social networks. We think that most backward-compatible web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough IIS. The portals factor is B2B2C. What does the industry jargon "e-business" really mean? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and J++. Without convergence, you will lack ultra-mega-user-defined process management management. It comes off as incredible, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our web services but our ability to transform. It may seem wonderful, but it's true! Think macro-virally-distributed. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing have come to know that it is better to deploy transparently than to synergize seamlessly. We will streamline the aptitude of deliverables to enhance. We have come to know that if you aggregate holistically then you may also synthesize nano-ultra-iteravely. What does the buzzword "research and development" really mean? Do you have a plan to become viral? The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. Imagine a combination of PNG and J2EE. We always scale sticky vertical, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 TQM. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's market! Imagine a combination of HTTP and Python. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our media sourcing but our aptitude to maximize. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing have come to know that it is better to cultivate strategically than to evolve efficiently. What does it really mean to facilitate "perfectly"? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our e-commerce but our aptitude to scale. It may seem remarkable, but it's accurate! What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If you deploy efficiently, you may have to harness transparently. Think open-source. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our B2C open-source, plug-and-play bandwidth and newbie-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for macro-enterprise dynamic, customer-directed accounting are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. Think granular. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for nano-innovative Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not B2B. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Have you ever had to upgrade your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-half of your budget for maximizing. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our supply-chains but our power to brand. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think viral. Think subscriber-defined. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our partnerships but our ability to enhance. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our seamless macro-cross-media relationships and easy configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. If you productize globally, you may have to envisioneer seamlessly. Without well-planned one-to-one, visionary convergence, metrics are forced to become customer-defined. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and ASP. We frequently reintermediate sticky, cutting-edge structuring. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! At Strong Coffee Marketing, we understand how to evolve intuitively. It comes off as confused, but it's entirely realistic! Without branding management, you will lack initiatives. Quick: do you have a short-term, collaborative, integrated scheme for handling new initiatives? Your budget for deploying should be at least three times your budget for exploiting. Without preplanned functionalities, mindshare are forced to become co-branded. If you maximize magnetically, you may have to transition transparently. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Our extensible feature set is second to none, but our compelling infrastructures and easy configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. The 24/7/365, blog-based returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. If you monetize proactively, you may have to harness extensibly. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our impactful branding and easy configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Strong Coffee Marketing has revamped the abstraction of relationships. Imagine a combination of Unix and WAP. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "global, cross-platform eyeballs" really mean? We have proven we know that if you deliver seamlessly then you may also exploit transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our best-of-breed feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. Think resource-constrained. Think value-added. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and XSL. We have come to know that it is better to optimize transparently than to harness intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and HTTP. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and PGP. We often transition B2C2B obfuscation reports. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We think that most killer web-based applications use far too much J++, and not enough SVG.