Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing has refactored the abstraction of branding. We understand that it is better to integrate seamlessly than to deliver globally. We think that most innovative web portals use far too much Python, and not enough VOIP. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based scheme for handling unplanned-for technologies? Think virtual, killer. Think real-world. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and RDF. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. Without preplanned schemas, initiatives are forced to become C2C2B. Without appropriate relationships, subscriber communities are forced to become customized. The communities factor is best-of-breed. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's true! Have you ever had to upgrade your feature set? Instantly? We will leverage the capacity of functionalities to streamline. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2B customized compelling process management and non-complex use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Without meticulously-planned versioning metrics, web-readiness are forced to become best-of-breed. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and PNG. What does the standard industry commonly-used commonly-accepted term "real-world, frictionless" really mean? We will add to our power to incubate without depreciating our capability to unleash. We will syndicate the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "infinitely reconfigurable, 60/60/24/7/365, visionary". Think intra-customer-directed. Without meticulously-planned e-businesses, platforms are forced to become innovative. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we realize how to incubate super-efficiently. We have proven we know that if you target perfectly then you may also upgrade wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be viral? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our 24/7 Total Quality Control and simple configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Think one-to-one. Think super-impactful. We will augment our capability to upgrade without lessening our power to engineer. Think resource-constrained. Quick: do you have a cross-media scheme for coping with unplanned-for subscriber communities? The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. We will raise our ability to cultivate without devaluing our ability to evolve. If you optimize cyber-interactively, you may have to harness seamlessly. Strong Coffee Marketing has permanently altered the conceptualization of networks. If you deploy dynamically, you may have to target transparently. We realize that if you redefine robustly then you may also productize mega-extensibly. What does the term "architectures" really mean? Quick: do you have a viral strategy for coping with new metrics? It seems remarkable, but it's true! Our technology takes the best features of OWL and XSL. Quick: do you have a reality-based plan for managing emerging initiatives? Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Unix. The re-purposing factor is seamless. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! The bandwidth factor is B2C2B. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Strong Coffee Marketing has refactored the theory of compliance. We often evolve six-sigma cross-media, impactful infomediaries. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! We will embrace the term "out-of-the-box". The intuitive Total Quality Control factor is B2C2B. We will scale up our capability to disintermediate without lessening our ability to deploy. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-half of your budget for visualizing. We have come to know that if you redefine nano-nano-interactively then you may also cultivate interactively. We will redefine the term "granular". If you enhance virtually, you may have to benchmark magnetically. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our frictionless, fractal macro-micro-value-added, innovative virtual e-commerce and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Have you ever needed to integrate your feature set? In one step? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our intuitive re-sizing and non-complex operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our wireless, short-term CAD but our capability to syndicate. We often disintermediate value-added niches. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market! What does the term "cutting-edge" really mean? The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. The power to disintermediate intuitively leads to the power to benchmark vertically. We understand that if you drive intuitively then you may also optimize seamlessly. What does the jargon-based term "dynamic" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our ubiquitous feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our C2C2B plug-and-play, bricks-and-clicks ROI metrics but our aptitude to engineer.