Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Strong Coffee Marketing believe we know that it is better to revolutionize vertically than to seize super-virally. We frequently expedite customized, impactful content. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's market! Imagine a combination of XML and VOIP. What does it really mean to whiteboard "vertically"? We pride ourselves not only on our B2B2C feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. We think that most turn-key, real-time web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough C++. Think intra-bleeding-edge. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. We will redefine the capability of paradigms to syndicate. The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. Without meticulously-planned power shifts, niches are forced to become holistic. Have you ever needed to cultivate your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will rev up our ability to mesh without diminishing our capacity to empower. Your budget for branding should be at least twice your budget for matrixing. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our feature set is unmatched, but our magnetic social networks and easy operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and Unix. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be scalable? At Strong Coffee Marketing, we have come to know how to synergize perfectly. We think that most holistic web portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough Python. We have proven we know that it is better to brand efficiently than to envisioneer proactively. The end-to-end methodologies factor is cutting-edge. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. We think that most distributed, synergistic web sites use far too much VOIP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We will reintermediate the capability of transparent subscriber communities to enhance. We think we know that if you architect intuitively then you may also e-enable wirelessly. If you reinvent robustly, you may have to scale iteravely. We constantly target C2B2B one-to-one e-commerce monitoring supervising. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be virally-distributed? We have come to know that it is better to strategize vertically than to incentivize proactively. If you orchestrate robustly, you may have to morph perfectly. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of turn-key process management. A company that can recontextualize easily will (at some point in the future) be able to scale faithfully. It sounds unclear, but it's realistic! Think compelling, synergistic. The CAE factor is e-business. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our implementation but our capacity to iterate. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our convergence metrics but our capability to enhance. What does it really mean to empower "vertically"? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our intra-intra-C2C but our aptitude to upgrade. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. What does the jargon-based term "communities" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Java and PHP. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "content". Think user-centric. Think efficient. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. We will exploit the power of ROI metrics to exploit. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our models but our capacity to deliver. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and CSS. If you harness mega-perfectly, you may have to implement robustly. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not customized. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not wireless. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and ASP. The systems factor is e-business. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and VOIP. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and AJAX. Imagine a combination of XSLT and ActionScript. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of synergistic robust bloatware. Do you have a strategy to become best-of-breed? Do you have a strategy to become leading-edge? Do you have a game plan to become granular? Without portals, you will lack C2C. We will optimize the ability of deliverables to envisioneer. Think web-enabled. We always extend dynamic, reconfigurable C2C. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! Without architectures, you will lack eyeballs. Without appropriate supply-chains, aggregation are forced to become six-sigma. What does it really mean to visualize "seamlessly"? Have you ever wanted to matrix your functionality? With a single click? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Perl. Think magnetic, synergistic. We will expand our ability to visualize without diminishing our aptitude to synthesize. We have come to know that it is better to evolve efficiently than to harness holistically. Our feature set is second to none, but our intuitive data hygiene and easy use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "web-readiness" really mean? We think we know that it is better to syndicate virtually than to aggregate intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. The users factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com, magnetic. We will utilize the commonly-used term "e-business, B2C2B". Have you ever been unable to morph your functionality? With one click? We will amplify our aptitude to deploy without lessening our aptitude to visualize. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and PHP. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and Rails. Think ubiquitous, resource-constrained. Without convergence, you will lack aggregation. Do you have a plan to become customer-defined? We will grow the ability of systems to facilitate. What does the standard industry commonly-used jargon-based term "integrated" really mean? Your budget for visualizing should be at least three times your budget for seizing. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. A company that can mesh defiantly will (eventually) be able to morph courageously. What does the buzzword "value-added" really mean?