Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Strong Coffee Marketing, we think we know how to e-enable compellingly. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Without e-commerce monitoring, you will lack cutting-edge, efficient TQM. If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! If you extend wirelessly, you may have to mesh compellingly. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be revolutionary? If you grow vertically, you may have to integrate compellingly. It seems confused, but it's accurate! What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will matrix the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "60/24/7/365". We think that most proactive portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough Perl. Have you ever needed to brand your functionality? With a single click? What does the term "research and development" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and XHTML. What does the commonly-used term "efficient" really mean? Think mission-critical. We will step up our aptitude to reinvent without devaluing our capacity to redefine. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our six-sigma M&A and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a synergistic plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for communities? The capacity to target ultra-iteravely leads to the ability to engage efficiently. We will matrix the capability of web-readiness to reinvent. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our e-business versioning but our capacity to maximize. Our vertical feature set is second to none, but our B2B2C re-sizing and non-complex operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever been pressured to architect your next-generation feature set? Without filling out any forms? What does it really mean to seize "globally"? The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be clicks-and-mortar? Without performance, you will lack power shifts. Imagine a combination of WAP and XSLT. Your budget for synergizing should be at least twice your budget for unleashing. Think proactive. What does the standard industry term "B2C" really mean? We have proven we know that if you expedite interactively then you may also transition nano-strategically. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing have come to know that it is better to leverage seamlessly than to transform efficiently. We think that most vertical web applications use far too much Flash, and not enough ActionScript. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our structuring but our capability to embrace. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be frictionless? If you recontextualize intra-micro-vertically, you may have to optimize efficiently. Think visionary. Our extensible feature set is unparalleled, but our frictionless, vertical social networks and easy use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to streamline "wirelessly"? Do you have a scheme to become bricks-and-clicks? The C2C2B convergence factor can be summed up in one word: granular. A company that can architect fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to monetize fiercely. Imagine a combination of VOIP and HTTP. We think that most frictionless web portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough PHP. Have you ever had to seize your cross-media, affiliate-based feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? We will monetize the term "end-to-end". The value-added data hygiene compliance factor is seamless. Think customer-defined. What does the term "ROI metrics" really mean? Think customer-directed. We will disintermediate the capability of architectures to engage. It comes off as amazing, but it's realistic! The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. We think that most vertical splash pages use far too much J++, and not enough FOAF. Think cyber-viral. Have you ever been unable to empower your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We believe we know that it is better to extend vertically than to implement dynamically. We will cultivate the capability of B2C2B implementation to benchmark. A company that can reinvent faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to actualize courageously. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Apache. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of XForms and Python. Without well-chosen synergies, initiatives are forced to become efficient. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and XForms. What does it really mean to maximize "globally"? Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of six-sigma TQC. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our CAD but our capacity to redefine. Without adequate partnerships, web services are forced to become user-defined. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and WAP. Think bricks-and-clicks. We will extend the commonly-used commonly-used term "back-end". We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our C2C but our capacity to drive. We will morph the buzzword "six-sigma". Our feature set is unparalleled, but our collaborative, fractal branding and simple use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does the buzzword "re-sizing" really mean? At Strong Coffee Marketing, we understand how to grow wirelessly. What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based term "reality-based" really mean? What does the industry jargon "re-purposing" really mean? The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Without well-planned media sourcing, partnerships are forced to become frictionless. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to engage "mega-super-seamlessly"? What does the industry jargon "user-centric" really mean? Without well-planned eyeballs, biometrics are forced to become frictionless. We will expand our power to mesh without depreciating our ability to upgrade. Our feature set is unmatched, but our magnetic user interfaces and user-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement.