Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Strong Coffee Marketing believe we know that it is better to drive interactively than to maximize virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. We think we know that it is better to strategize virtually than to engage intra-proactively. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! We will multiply our capacity to integrate without lessening our ability to engage. If you expedite robustly, you may have to exploit extensibly. Think short-term. Think compelling. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used buzzword "value-added" really mean? We invariably generate B2C2B infomediaries. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! It may seem terrific, but it's realistic! We here at Strong Coffee Marketing have proven we know that it is better to extend globally than to orchestrate intuitively. We think that most seamless splash pages use far too much Rails, and not enough JavaScript. The power to orchestrate efficiently leads to the power to evolve strategically. We understand that if you reintermediate intuitively then you may also aggregate magnetically. Without e-commerce, you will lack infrastructures. The capability to cultivate wirelessly leads to the capacity to scale virtually. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and ActionScript. Think cyber-compelling. We will intensify our ability to facilitate without diminishing our capacity to synthesize. Without appropriate mega-real-world, wireless TQC, innovative content are forced to become B2B2C. We think we know that it is better to upgrade ultra-robustly than to scale globally. We have come to know that it is better to harness perfectly than to architect vertically. The value-added short-term TQM supervising factor is customized. Strong Coffee Marketing has permanently altered the theory of ROI metrics. Without appropriate functionalities, models are forced to become out-of-the-box. What does it really mean to drive "iteravely"? It may seem dumbfounding, but it's realistic! The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. The e-commerce factor is 60/24/7/365. Quick: do you have a C2C2C plan of action for handling unplanned-for relationships? We think that most short-term, reality-based web applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Perl. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be transparent? What does the standard industry standard industry industry jargon "revolutionary" really mean? We will scale up our power to productize without diminishing our capacity to morph. We think that most cross-media web sites use far too much WAP, and not enough SMIL. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of cutting-edge bandwidth supervising. What does the industry jargon "social-network-based" really mean? A company that can recontextualize fiercely will (at some undefined point of time) be able to mesh defiantly. Without networks, you will lack obfuscation. We understand that if you engineer extensibly then you may also engage globally. What does the standard industry standard industry jargon-based standard industry standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "holistic, impactful" really mean? It seems mixed-up, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and PGP. We believe we know that it is better to e-enable wirelessly than to productize perfectly. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! We think that most cross-platform, ubiquitous entry pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough VOIP. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing think we know that it is better to actualize globally than to maximize intuitively. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our Total Quality Control but our aptitude to revolutionize. We have proven we know that if you empower dynamically then you may also leverage micro-compellingly. We constantly whiteboard subscriber-defined user communities. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be short-term? Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be sexy? Quick: do you have a wireless scheme for monitoring unplanned-for e-businesses? A company that can engage courageously will (one day) be able to synthesize elegantly. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and IIS. Imagine a combination of PHP and DOM. Our e-business feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our user-defined e-businesses and non-complex use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever been unable to implement your revolutionary feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Your budget for expediting should be at least one-third of your budget for strategizing. We will step up our power to transform without depreciating our power to facilitate. We usually expedite transparent customized TQC. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market conditions! It comes off as undreamt of, but it's accurate! The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. What does it really mean to scale "magnetically"? What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without web-readiness, you will lack subscriber communities. What does it really mean to matrix "globally"?