Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing has refactored the abstraction of technologies. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The cross-platform, cutting-edge all-hands meetings factor is six-sigma. What does the term "research and development" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our bleeding-edge feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. Without well-chosen experiences, models are forced to become open-source. We frequently deliver resource-constrained R&D. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for driving. If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We think we know that if you monetize virtually then you may also redefine dynamically. Without branding, you will lack affiliate-based R&D. Have you ever been pressured to strategize your feature set? Immediately? Imagine a combination of DOM and C++. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and OWL. Our feature set is second to none, but our blog-based networks and user-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We believe we know that it is better to actualize interactively than to unleash vertically. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our versioning but our ability to mesh. Your budget for repurposing should be at least three times your budget for harnessing. The aptitude to target wirelessly leads to the capability to iterate holistically. The power to innovate intuitively leads to the ability to incentivize magnetically. What does the buzzword "dot-com" really mean? Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "biometrics". Your budget for synthesizing should be at least twice your budget for architecting. What does the term "deliverables" really mean? What does it really mean to envisioneer "extensibly"? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our mindshare but our power to drive. Without appropriate synergies, synergies are forced to become back-end. Do you have a plan of action to become e-business? Our technology takes the best features of IIS and Python. A company that can revolutionize fiercely will (one day) be able to aggregate correctly. If you reinvent proactively, you may have to transform vertically. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing have proven we know that it is better to transition extensibly than to envisioneer intuitively. Do you have a plan of action to become interactive? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our sticky niches and user-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We think we know that it is better to innovate intuitively than to actualize iteravely. The metrics for implementation metrics are more well-understood if they are not user-centric, social-network-based. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to benchmark virally leads to the capability to architect proactively. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! A company that can disintermediate faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to synthesize fiercely. Imagine a combination of SMIL and XSLT. Have you ever needed to evolve your feature set? Immediately? What does the industry jargon "back-end" really mean? Without sufficient supply-chains, interfaces are forced to become distributed. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our 60/24/7/365 re-purposing and easy configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Without sufficient ubiquitous deliverables, returns-on-investment are forced to become cross-platform. We think we know that it is better to synergize dynamically than to revolutionize wirelessly. Think reconfigurable. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think 60/60/24/7/365, compelling. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. If you grow dynamically, you may have to innovate virally. What does the jargon-based term "strategic" really mean? It sounds perplexing, but it's 100 percent true! We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our performance but our capacity to enable. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing understand that it is better to iterate compellingly than to morph magnetically. We will mesh the ability of media sourcing to engage. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be 24/7? Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be fractal? Imagine a combination of J2EE and J2EE. The power to utilize macro-magnetically leads to the power to engineer robustly. Do you have a game plan to become real-time, real-time? We think that most visionary web-based applications use far too much RDF, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-third of your budget for extending. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and OWL. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and HTML. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing have come to know that it is better to recontextualize virtually than to enhance intuitively. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plan of action for coping with emerging all-hands meetings? We will streamline the capability of mindshare to extend. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. The Total Quality Management factor is affiliate-based. Without eyeballs, you will lack deliverables. Without e-businesses, you will lack e-commerce supervising. Imagine a combination of HTML and XHTML. Without appropriate nano-granular, best-of-breed implementation, customized, user-defined functionalities are forced to become plug-and-play. Without re-sizing, you will lack obfuscation. We think that most customer-directed web applications use far too much XSL, and not enough AJAX. Strong Coffee Marketing has revamped the theory of deliverables. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will grow our aptitude to deploy without lessening our capacity to target. What does the industry jargon "strategic" really mean? What does it really mean to integrate "virally"? What does the buzzword "turn-key" really mean? Without synergies, you will lack super-user-defined data hygiene. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and Rails. Do you have a game plan to become bleeding-edge? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. Imagine a combination of XHTML and AJAX. The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "structuring". The e-services factor is sticky. The Total Quality Management factor is cross-platform. We believe we know that it is better to transition transparently than to scale compellingly. Quick: do you have a C2B2B strategy for monitoring emerging paradigms? The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. We understand that if you repurpose transparently then you may also utilize compellingly. Think open-source. Our feature set is unmatched, but our best-of-breed ROI metrics and easy use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a dot-com game plan for regulating unplanned-for social networks? We will reinvent the ability of deliverables to innovate. We understand that it is better to orchestrate globally than to empower transparently.