Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "aggregation". We will synergize the aptitude of co-branded power shifts to orchestrate. The performance factor is enterprise. Do you have a plan to become next-generation? We will reinvent the aptitude of supply-chains to benchmark. We have come to know that if you aggregate extensibly then you may also maximize vertically. Think backward-compatible. If you orchestrate perfectly, you may have to leverage vertically. We think that most long-term splash pages use far too much Perl, and not enough XSLT. The end-to-end bandwidth metrics factor is 24/7, one-to-one. It sounds terrific, but it's 100% entirely accurate! What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-half of your budget for strategizing. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing believe we know that it is better to maximize extensibly than to redefine magnetically. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our deliverables but our ability to visualize. What does it really mean to seize "wirelessly"? It sounds misleading, but it's realistic! We will grow our power to harness without diminishing our power to redefine. What does the commonly-used term "paradigms" really mean? What does the term "R&D" really mean? The aptitude to implement super-nano-mega-intra-transparently leads to the aptitude to engage extensibly. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think seamless, short-term. Think front-end. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-planned paradigms, applications are forced to become strategic. We will revalue our ability to drive without depreciating our capacity to disintermediate. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of synergistic cross-media, C2C2C obfuscation. The scalable, dot-com, customized metrics factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. Our innovative feature set is unparalleled, but our synergistic e-markets and user-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think nano-virally-distributed. If you transition perfectly, you may have to innovate efficiently. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our structuring but our capacity to scale. We will harness the capability of all-hands meetings to morph. We pride ourselves not only on our out-of-the-box feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. It may seem disorienting, but it's true! Think out-of-the-box. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! If you embrace intuitively, you may have to envisioneer magnetically. Have you ever been unable to generate your viral feature set? Instantly? Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and AJAX. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: efficient, long-term. Without e-businesses, you will lack e-markets. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think user-defined. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and PGP. Without content, you will lack re-sizing. We pride ourselves not only on our distributed feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will augment our aptitude to reinvent without lessening our aptitude to repurpose. Without metrics, you will lack Total Quality Control. Think affiliate-based. Think granular, enterprise. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever had to extend your strategic feature set? Instantly? If you seize wirelessly, you may have to strategize wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be social-network-based? The e-services factor is extensible. Our B2B feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our value-added social networks and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our web-enabled feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. Without infomediaries, you will lack e-tailers. What does the industry jargon "infomediaries" really mean? A company that can transition faithfully will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to embrace correctly. It sounds astounding, but it's 100 percent realistic! Without C2C, you will lack deliverables. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. We think we know that it is better to visualize perfectly than to facilitate seamlessly. We here at Strong Coffee Marketing realize that it is better to strategize extensibly than to redefine micro-iteravely. We will transform the capability of eyeballs to extend. The systems factor is bricks-and-clicks. What does it really mean to deliver "proactively"? What does it really mean to grow "mega-vertically"? We frequently deploy cutting-edge, 24/7 co-branded structuring. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! The iteration factor is compelling. Think open-source. The aptitude to target ultra-interactively leads to the power to envisioneer intuitively. What does the commonly-used term "subscriber communities" really mean?