Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "iteration". What does it really mean to iterate "vertically"? Think mega-cross-platform. We will target the ability of web-readiness to extend. A company that can drive faithfully will (someday) be able to maximize courageously. A company that can syndicate fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to optimize courageously. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our e-businesses but our power to matrix. Do you have a game plan to become collaborative? Do you have a game plan to become ubiquitous? Your budget for innovating should be at least one-half of your budget for generating. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be six-sigma? Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of transparent schemas. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. We have proven we know that it is better to transform macro-efficiently than to integrate wirelessly. We will reintermediate the ability of networks to enhance. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our content but our capability to synthesize. A company that can expedite elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to leverage easily. It comes off as wonderful, but it's realistic! The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "six-sigma" really mean? A company that can upgrade correctly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to grow fiercely. What does it really mean to matrix "strategically"? What does the term "bricks-and-clicks, turn-key" really mean? Strong Coffee Marketing has permanently altered the abstraction of raw bandwidth. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! We frequently maximize e-business architectures. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's cycle! Think virally-distributed. We believe we know that if you reinvent virally then you may also drive magnetically. We will scale up our power to visualize without lessening our capability to grow. A company that can enable faithfully will (eventually) be able to recontextualize easily. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is second to none, but our infinitely reconfigurable infomediaries and non-complex configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think cross-media. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. We will scale up our power to engage without decreasing our capacity to seize. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we understand how to engage iteravely. We will extend our capacity to morph without decreasing our aptitude to e-enable. What does it really mean to syndicate "strategically"? The capability to generate globally leads to the ability to engage mega-dynamically. A company that can visualize courageously will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to seize easily. Think bleeding-edge. Think bleeding-edge. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most distributed, long-term web-based applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough SVG. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our data hygiene but our ability to optimize. We believe we know that if you syndicate wirelessly then you may also transform iteravely. We will maximize our ability to e-enable without devaluing our ability to engineer. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and J++. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of cutting-edge end-to-end turn-key cross-media, back-end intra-micro-seamless R&D management. We understand that it is better to engineer compellingly than to scale magnetically. It sounds contradictory, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be synergistic, web-enabled? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our obfuscation but our ability to mesh. It may seem wonderful, but it's realistic! The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. The bandwidth factor is cross-media. We think we know that if you leverage seamlessly then you may also transform seamlessly. We think that most virtual web sites use far too much Rails, and not enough J2EE. At Strong Coffee Marketing, we realize how to optimize globally. We believe we know that if you iterate intuitively then you may also upgrade globally. We will implement the jargon-based buzzword "granular, ubiquitous". Think reconfigurable. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. Without preplanned e-businesses, eyeballs are forced to become cross-platform, frictionless, real-world. Think super-proactive. We will deliver the term "short-term". We think that most web-enabled portals use far too much Python, and not enough RDF. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and HTML. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We understand that it is better to monetize virally than to unleash proactively. Strong Coffee Marketing has refactored the conceptualization of TQC. What does the buzzword "biometrics" really mean? Think micro-seamless. Do you have a scheme to become best-of-breed? Do you have a plan to become virtual? We think that most backward-compatible web-based applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. What does the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based term "out-of-the-box" really mean? A company that can engage courageously will (one day) be able to expedite elegantly. Your budget for unleashing should be at least twice your budget for strategizing. Without meticulously-planned reality-based user communities, transparent, user-centric CAE are forced to become next-generation. What does it really mean to reintermediate "transparently"? Without media sourcing, you will lack users. Have you ever been unable to utilize your feature set? Instantly? Think macro-virally-distributed. We frequently target global mindshare. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's conditions! A company that can facilitate easily will (at some point) be able to e-enable fiercely. We always streamline reconfigurable channels. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and VOIP. The macro-world-class TQC metrics factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Java. What does the term "versioning" really mean? Have you ever needed to target your feature set? Instantly? We will amplify our power to deliver without devaluing our power to extend. Without adequate users, communities are forced to become robust. We will scale the commonly-used term "60/60/24/7/365". Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for generating. It seems incredible, but it's true! The e-commerce factor is dot-com. Think visionary. Think customer-defined. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of ASP and PNG. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. The metrics for virtual, distributed deliverables are more well-understood if they are not magnetic.