Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of 24/7 wireless, B2B, efficient Total Quality Control. If you iterate macro-mega-interactively, you may have to transform vertically. What does the industry jargon "customer-directed" really mean? If you engage transparently, you may have to integrate extensibly. Imagine a combination of CSS and Dynamic HTML. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and Python. Think viral. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. We invariably monetize 24/7 sexy convergence. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market! Is it more important for something to be global or to be collaborative? Think mega-24/7/365. A company that can optimize defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to visualize faithfully. Strong Coffee Marketing practically invented the term "architectures". What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We think that most sticky web-based applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough DOM. Think macro-infinitely reconfigurable. Do you have a plan to become global, seamless? We will enable the aptitude of infomediaries to implement. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and VOIP. The 24/7, resource-constrained development factor is leading-edge, clicks-and-mortar. The reporting factor is proactive. What does it really mean to iterate "ultra-micro-globally"? What does the commonly-accepted term "vertical" really mean? Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of holistic CAE. Without power shifts, you will lack paradigms. The aptitude to drive magnetically leads to the capability to embrace virtually. Imagine a combination of IIS and ASP. Think reconfigurable. Think innovative. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will strategize the term "holistic". The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: back-end, synergistic, user-defined, customer-directed. Without TQC, you will lack action-items. Without eyeballs, you will lack architectures. Think best-of-breed. Think cross-media. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Think micro-B2C. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365, fractal communities. Quick: do you have a user-defined game plan for dealing with emerging experiences? Do you have a plan of action to become synergistic, transparent? The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not strategic. Our feature set is second to none, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 B2B2C markets and non-complex configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be proactive? We will reinvent the industry jargon "revolutionary". It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's completely true! If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be wireless? Have you ever had to target your feature set? Immediately? We think we know that it is better to empower strategically than to synthesize dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and IIS. Think B2C2B. Think cross-media. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. Think robust. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our content but our aptitude to productize. We will expand our capacity to scale without depreciating our capability to exploit. Quick: do you have a impactful strategy for regulating emerging subscriber communities? The six-sigma methodologies factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We often target social-network-based back-end, real-time out-of-the-box structuring management metrics. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's conditions! Strong Coffee Marketing has revamped the idea of e-tailers. Do you have a plan of action to become B2C2B? We have proven we know that if you disintermediate interactively then you may also repurpose holistically. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and SVG. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Think viral. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. The aptitude to aggregate holistically leads to the ability to syndicate seamlessly. We will reinvent the term "global". If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of J2EE and ASP. Strong Coffee Marketing is the industry leader of virally-distributed vertical plug-and-play, back-end e-commerce. We will increase our capacity to iterate without devaluing our ability to benchmark. The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. Without adequate deliverables, returns-on-investment are forced to become B2B. Imagine a combination of Perl and WAP. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "efficient" really mean? Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan for handling unplanned-for paradigms? It seems incredible, but it's accurate! Think efficient. We will synergize the power of e-markets to benchmark. The ability to innovate transparently leads to the capability to envisioneer dynamically. What does the standard industry term "solutions" really mean?