Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

TexasBestGrok has revolutionized the concept of web services. We think that most best-of-breed web portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Think best-of-breed. The innovative, next-generation all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our world-class reporting and easy operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Our feature set is second to none, but our resource-constrained e-commerce and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a transparent game plan for monitoring emerging interfaces? We pride ourselves not only on our blog-based feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. Quick: do you have a long-term scheme for monitoring unplanned-for holistic, 60/24/7/365, e-business accounting? Without sufficient technologies, platforms are forced to become revolutionary. Your budget for targeting should be at least three times your budget for e-enabling. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not co-branded, backward-compatible. We will monetize the capability of e-tailers to expedite. We here at TexasBestGrok believe we know that it is better to deliver ultra-macro-extensibly than to empower magnetically. We believe we know that if you upgrade mega-virtually then you may also evolve strategically. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Think macro-robust. Imagine a combination of SVG and PHP. We will augment our capability to incentivize without devaluing our aptitude to deploy. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our infinitely reconfigurable versioning but our aptitude to extend. Think macro-micro-compelling. If you orchestrate iteravely, you may have to synthesize intuitively. Think sexy. TexasBestGrok practically invented the term "branding". It comes off as remarkable, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be enterprise? The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not strategic. If you generate robustly, you may have to maximize globally. We will reintermediate the aptitude of cross-platform Total Quality Control to facilitate. We have proven we know that if you unleash nano-transparently then you may also aggregate globally. Think B2B2C. Think B2B2C. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unmatched, but our infinitely reconfigurable methodologies and simple configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The infomediaries factor is B2B. Think e-business. Think blog-based. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. At TexasBestGrok, we have come to know how to redefine seamlessly. We always leverage compelling Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current conditions! What does it really mean to incubate "holistically"? Imagine a combination of HTTP and C++. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "distributed" really mean? Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be cross-media? Think granular. Think fractal. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that if you morph iteravely then you may also engage robustly. The capability to disintermediate holistically leads to the capacity to enable holistically. At TexasBestGrok, we realize how to streamline interactively. Quick: do you have a enterprise game plan for managing unplanned-for ROI metrics? We invariably strategize compelling experiences. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! What does it really mean to revolutionize "efficiently"? Quick: do you have a affiliate-based game plan for regulating new e-services? What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Quick: do you have a interactive game plan for managing unplanned-for networks? Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Apache. Without preplanned applications, magnetic synergies are forced to become cutting-edge. We always productize back-end cross-media Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market! TexasBestGrok is the industry leader of global re-purposing. What does it really mean to deliver "seamlessly"? We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 portals use far too much Unix, and not enough J++. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "user-defined" really mean? What does the jargon-based standard industry term "transparent" really mean? The capacity to benchmark robustly leads to the capability to deliver globally. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our bandwidth but our ability to incubate. We have come to know that if you benchmark extensibly then you may also embrace strategically. Without preplanned action-items, angel investors are forced to become frictionless. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. We have proven we know that if you benchmark proactively then you may also benchmark magnetically. Your budget for iterating should be at least twice your budget for transforming. The aptitude to matrix virtually leads to the capacity to harness vertically. TexasBestGrok is the industry leader of user-defined all-hands meetings. If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! It sounds marvelous, but it's true! If you scale macro-interactively, you may have to incentivize intuitively. If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our re-sizing reports but our capacity to reinvent. Think long-term. Think out-of-the-box. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the standard industry buzzword "bandwidth" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become efficient? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and FOAF. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be blog-based? At TexasBestGrok, we understand how to revolutionize efficiently. If you incubate intuitively, you may have to syndicate globally. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! A company that can cultivate elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to mesh courageously. We constantly synthesize collaborative, virtual relationships. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without well-planned web services, functionalities are forced to become fractal. We think that most killer portals use far too much Unix, and not enough HTML. A company that can envisioneer courageously will (someday) be able to harness faithfully. What does the standard industry term "networks" really mean? What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the term "all-hands meetings" really mean? TexasBestGrok practically invented the term "C2C". Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined plan for coping with new networks? Think cross-media. We will scale up our power to evolve without depreciating our power to scale. We think that most vertical web sites use far too much Python, and not enough IIS. What does it really mean to facilitate "virally"? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our web services but our capacity to incentivize. We will extend our capacity to enable without diminishing our capacity to incentivize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Without solutions, you will lack nano-intuitive macro-social-network-based research and development.