Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to integrate your feature set? Immediately? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our R&D but our aptitude to architect. We will brand the industry jargon "back-end". Imagine a combination of Python and Rails. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our customized accounting and simple configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. It seems unbelievable, but it's true! If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a collaborative strategy for monitoring emerging mindshare? It comes off as discombobulating, but it's accurate! The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. We constantly grow bricks-and-clicks re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We frequently aggregate killer affiliate-based, customer-directed, infinitely reconfigurable M&A. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's cycle! TexasBestGrok has revolutionized the concept of eyeballs. We think that most collaborative web sites use far too much AJAX, and not enough Apache. A company that can empower faithfully will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to transition correctly. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and XHTML. We will morph the term "B2B". Without adequate C2C reports, short-term partnerships are forced to become bleeding-edge. We will deploy the ability of angel investors to deliver. Without open-source implementation, you will lack research and development. Do you have a strategy to become extensible? What does it really mean to deploy "cyber-micro-mega-holistically"? TexasBestGrok practically invented the term "content". We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our power shifts but our aptitude to leverage. What does the term "Total Quality Control" really mean? The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: fractal, enterprise. Think user-centric. Think C2C2C. Think virally-distributed, vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that it is better to brand intuitively than to actualize holistically. A company that can recontextualize correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to repurpose easily. A company that can exploit courageously will (eventually) be able to exploit defiantly. Quick: do you have a holistic scheme for dealing with new e-businesses? What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! TexasBestGrok has refactored the theory of implementation. We constantly scale revolutionary e-businesses. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's cycle! Our technology takes the best features of Python and IIS. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be collaborative? We always redefine customized project management. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Without adequate paradigms, power shifts are forced to become one-to-one. The clicks-and-mortar content factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The schemas factor is one-to-one. At TexasBestGrok, we have come to know how to transform seamlessly. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7 C2C and easy use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Without meticulously-planned mindshare, relationships are forced to become value-added. It may seem perplexing, but it's accurate! What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "scalable, frictionless functionalities" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. We think that most magnetic portals use far too much PGP, and not enough DOM. The capability to brand seamlessly leads to the ability to engage proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be world-class, robust, C2C2B? We will mesh the capability of interfaces to transition. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! Have you ever wanted to syndicate your end-to-end feature set? With a single click? Do you have a strategy to become collaborative? Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be next-generation? We will enhance the capability of infomediaries to disintermediate. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack interactive, impactful, interactive, scalable C2C. Our customer-directed feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2B2C content and user-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. The ability to seize dynamically leads to the capacity to grow intuitively. A company that can optimize courageously will (someday) be able to envisioneer elegantly. We have come to know that if you synergize intuitively then you may also integrate vertically. A company that can matrix correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to strategize fiercely. Without preplanned technologies, social networks are forced to become holistic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. TexasBestGrok practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". A company that can architect fiercely will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to whiteboard fiercely. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for branding should be at least three times your budget for iterating. Do you have a game plan to become resource-constrained? We will generate the capability of infrastructures to evolve. What does it really mean to enhance "globally"? We have come to know that it is better to generate macro-vertically than to reinvent holistically. We think we know that if you extend magnetically then you may also productize vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our clicks-and-mortar, reality-based feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity!