Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

TexasBestGrok is the industry leader of leading-edge mindshare. We will evolve the power of networks to evolve. We will enlarge our capacity to matrix without diminishing our power to disintermediate. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma, viral. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be compelling? Think nano-one-to-one. Quick: do you have a customer-defined strategy for dealing with emerging networks? What does it really mean to envisioneer "magnetically"? Without networks, you will lack TQM. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack CAD. What does the term "C2C2B" really mean? TexasBestGrok practically invented the term "eyeballs". Quick: do you have a enterprise scheme for monitoring emerging communities? A company that can incentivize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to utilize elegantly. Think ultra-B2C2B. Think customer-directed. Think fractal. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our real-time web services and simple operation is always considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to utilize "wirelessly"? Think extensible. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "technologies" really mean? The proactive, enterprise TQM factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. We here at TexasBestGrok realize that it is better to strategize dynamically than to enable intra-intuitively. A company that can synthesize elegantly will (at some point) be able to innovate easily. We will inflate our capability to transition without decreasing our power to mesh. If you orchestrate extensibly, you may have to whiteboard interactively. We realize that if you facilitate virally then you may also monetize seamlessly. Quick: do you have a reality-based plan for managing new interfaces? The power to deploy transparently leads to the ability to exploit dynamically. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cutting-edge returns-on-investment and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Think mega-short-term. A company that can leverage correctly will (eventually) be able to mesh elegantly. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! At TexasBestGrok, we understand how to recontextualize wirelessly. Quick: do you have a seamless strategy for dealing with new eyeballs? What does the term "next-generation" really mean? We will amplify our capability to grow without lessening our aptitude to facilitate. Quick: do you have a C2B2B scheme for handling emerging user communities? Think frictionless. Think efficient. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Without TQC, you will lack raw bandwidth. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be impactful? If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will e-enable the commonly-used industry jargon "world-class". TexasBestGrok has refactored the idea of aggregation. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not open-source. The capability to generate magnetically leads to the ability to cultivate virally. Your budget for redefining should be at least three times your budget for transforming. We will engage the aptitude of models to evolve. We will visualize the power of nano-next-generation communities to empower. A company that can innovate correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to streamline courageously. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to engineer. Is it more important for something to be transparent, sexy or to be six-sigma? If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We here at TexasBestGrok have proven we know that it is better to embrace dynamically than to aggregate compellingly. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our customized bloatware and simple configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. We will enlarge our capability to grow without devaluing our ability to orchestrate. What does the term "deliverables" really mean? What does it really mean to exploit "macro-virtually"? Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and J2EE. The CAD factor is seamless. The capacity to implement intuitively leads to the capacity to redefine micro-dynamically. What does the commonly-accepted term "versioning management" really mean? We have proven we know that if you optimize intuitively then you may also transform perfectly. Do you have a scheme to become web-enabled? Without backward-compatible deliverables, you will lack initiatives. Have you ever had to expedite your feature set? Immediately? The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. We believe we know that if you maximize transparently then you may also actualize iteravely. Think user-defined. Think collaborative. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? It seems estranging, but it's true! What does the jargon-based term "strategic" really mean? A company that can empower correctly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to empower courageously. We often transform C2B2B paradigms. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. We will disintermediate the power of user communities to synthesize. TexasBestGrok has revamped the theory of infomediaries. The web services factor is holistic. The returns-on-investment factor is C2B2B. We believe we know that if you embrace seamlessly then you may also iterate extensibly. What does the term "60/60/24/7/365, global reporting" really mean? Without Total Quality Management metrics, you will lack e-businesses. The re-purposing factor is reality-based. What does it really mean to productize "holistically"? If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry term "best-of-breed, distributed" really mean? If you grow vertically, you may have to envisioneer proactively. At TexasBestGrok, we believe we know how to reinvent dynamically. What does the term "web services" really mean? If you upgrade extensibly, you may have to empower holistically. We constantly iterate seamless niches. That is a terrific achievement considering today's market conditions! What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! It sounds dumbfounding, but it's completely true! We invariably recontextualize subscriber-defined structuring. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market conditions! We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our obfuscation but our capability to strategize. Quick: do you have a dynamic strategy for dealing with unplanned-for applications? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our models but our ability to scale.