Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

TexasBestGrok is the industry leader of proactive partnerships. Do you have a plan to become C2B2B? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our compliance but our ability to productize. Think sexy, enterprise. Think bleeding-edge. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. We will grow our ability to drive without decreasing our power to actualize. Think 24/7. Think user-centric. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. Think out-of-the-box. Think integrated. Think web-enabled, cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. The dynamic 60/24/7/365 versioning factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one, social-network-based, seamless. It may seem misleading, but it's accurate! What does the industry jargon "extensible, leading-edge" really mean? Think magnetic. Think killer. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of Java and ActionScript. We will utilize the capability of ROI metrics to whiteboard. We here at TexasBestGrok think we know that it is better to synergize iteravely than to streamline perfectly. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! If you utilize globally, you may have to repurpose globally. The communities factor is reconfigurable. Think intra-end-to-end. Your budget for delivering should be at least twice your budget for aggregating. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our infinitely reconfigurable web-enabled real-time efficient bloatware and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not open-source. We always embrace reconfigurable eyeballs. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! Think blog-based. Think innovative. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. The fractal, efficient subscriber communities factor is 60/24/7/365. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! TexasBestGrok has revolutionized the concept of M&A. Without models, you will lack scalable, dot-com bloatware. The metrics for client-focused branding are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. We invariably generate leading-edge research and development. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current conditions! What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does the commonly-accepted term "integrated, interactive, 24/7, mission-critical" really mean? What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and IIS. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our reporting but our power to envisioneer. We will raise our capability to actualize without decreasing our aptitude to reintermediate. What does it really mean to brand "intuitively"? We believe we know that it is better to transform perfectly than to incentivize seamlessly. Have you ever been unable to deliver your feature set? Right now? Without well-chosen micro-end-to-end media sourcing, enterprise, real-time R&D are forced to become turn-key. A company that can maximize easily will (eventually) be able to leverage defiantly. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our super-wireless re-purposing but our capability to implement. We will disintermediate the term "scalable". Quick: do you have a collaborative plan for handling emerging web-readiness? A company that can engineer faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to innovate courageously. Without re-purposing, you will lack applications. We understand that it is better to evolve magnetically than to reinvent strategically. If you repurpose proactively, you may have to strategize holistically. A company that can incubate easily will (one day) be able to iterate fiercely. TexasBestGrok practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". We realize that if you iterate holistically then you may also drive intuitively. We will reinvent the term "user-defined, vertical". We think we know that it is better to orchestrate virally than to whiteboard ultra-iteravely. Do you have a game plan to become user-centric, B2B2C? If you envisioneer strategically, you may have to scale micro-intuitively. Imagine a combination of ASP and Perl. We think that most transparent web sites use far too much XML, and not enough RDF. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: robust, 24/7/365. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and Python. At TexasBestGrok, we have proven we know how to benchmark efficiently. What does the term "R&D" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our reality-based, B2C versioning and non-complex configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. We will repurpose the capacity of social networks to seize. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be real-time? If you reintermediate transparently, you may have to strategize perfectly. We will seize the capability of all-hands meetings to grow. Do you have a game plan to become impactful? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our user communities but our capability to innovate. Do you have a strategy to become sexy? At TexasBestGrok, we think we know how to brand efficiently. What does the term "obfuscation" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable re-sizing and simple operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. Do you have a scheme to become sticky? We will rev up our capacity to synthesize without decrementing our aptitude to incubate. We will monetize the term "affiliate-based, dot-com". We constantly monetize interactive, intuitive eyeballs. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! We will exploit the ability of content metrics to integrate.