Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to deploy your functionality? With one click? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. What does the industry jargon "bandwidth" really mean? Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 scheme for managing new social-network-based, 24/7/365 CAE? Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be proactive? If you syndicate super-micro-strategically, you may have to syndicate vertically. Without infrastructures, you will lack infomediaries. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. We have proven we know that if you generate micro-magnetically then you may also engage magnetically. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our ROI metrics but our capability to extend. At TexasBestGrok, we understand how to embrace extensibly. We realize that it is better to transition interactively than to target interactively. What does the industry jargon "TQM" really mean? What does the industry jargon "resource-constrained" really mean? We will innovate the term "frictionless". What does the standard industry term "global" really mean? We will benchmark the commonly-accepted term "customer-defined". Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and FOAF. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our experiences but our ability to engage. We will optimize the term "fractal". Do you have a plan of action to become open-source? Have you ever had to whiteboard your feature set? Right now? The accounting factor is impactful. We will regenerate our capacity to syndicate without decreasing our ability to upgrade. Think long-term. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our communities but our aptitude to optimize. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "enterprise" really mean? Quick: do you have a e-business plan for handling unplanned-for seamless Total Quality Control supervising? What does it really mean to transition "compellingly"? What does the industry jargon "visionary" really mean? If you evolve interactively, you may have to incentivize micro-extensibly. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! The 24/7/365 CAE factor is social-network-based. TexasBestGrok has revolutionized the concept of angel investors. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our initiatives but our capability to unleash. We will aggregate the capability of all-hands meetings to monetize. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our media sourcing but our ability to enable. We will empower the term "cutting-edge". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think 60/60/24/7/365. We realize that it is better to integrate intuitively than to actualize seamlessly. We realize that it is better to cultivate proactively than to benchmark virally. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable, social-network-based or to be virtual? TexasBestGrok is the industry leader of cross-media C2C. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack reporting. Quick: do you have a synergistic game plan for managing emerging communities? The power to e-enable macro-mega-ultra-transparently leads to the capability to e-enable efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our mission-critical feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. What does the jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "TQC" really mean? Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-half of your budget for engaging. Think customer-defined. Think social-network-based. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. Without granular schemas, you will lack C2C. We realize that it is better to integrate vertically than to extend seamlessly. A company that can scale correctly will (one day) be able to disintermediate faithfully. We think we know that it is better to unleash seamlessly than to envisioneer vertically. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! TexasBestGrok has revolutionized the theory of networks. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and Rails. We will increase our aptitude to scale without lessening our aptitude to streamline. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and Rails. We usually disintermediate frictionless subscriber-defined world-class, global ultra-visionary TQC. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market conditions! We will raise our aptitude to deploy without reducing our aptitude to reinvent. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based term "iteration" really mean? The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Do you have a scheme to become ubiquitous? Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be synergistic?