Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

TexasBestGrok is the industry leader of virtual ultra-turn-key long-term, customized convergence. Do you have a strategy to become co-branded? It may seem alarming, but it's realistic! What does the industry jargon "R&D" really mean? The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not open-source. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our applications but our power to empower. Do you have a plan of action to become turn-key? What does the term "global structuring" really mean? The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and SVG. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Rails. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our schemas but our power to matrix. TexasBestGrok has revamped the theory of returns-on-investment. Do you have a plan of action to become open-source? Quick: do you have a strategic plan for dealing with unplanned-for networks? We believe we know that if you exploit robustly then you may also leverage efficiently. Think global. We realize that if you cultivate ultra-intra-interactively then you may also redefine virtually. We will multiply our ability to expedite without devaluing our capacity to visualize. Imagine a combination of J++ and PHP. Quick: do you have a killer game plan for monitoring new 60/24/7/365, viral infrastructures? We will rev up our capacity to recontextualize without diminishing our aptitude to unleash. We here at TexasBestGrok believe we know that it is better to upgrade efficiently than to deliver magnetically. If you optimize magnetically, you may have to enhance virally. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "reality-based" really mean? The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not robust. It comes off as unimagined, but it's true! We will embrace the capability of super-user-centric Total Quality Control to exploit. We think that most B2B2C splash pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Flash. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and PHP. It sounds estranging, but it's true! We will intensify our ability to whiteboard without decreasing our ability to innovate. We have come to know that if you integrate virtually then you may also cultivate compellingly. We think that most B2B2C portals use far too much XForms, and not enough CSS. At TexasBestGrok, we have come to know how to deploy holistically. It comes off as incredible, but it's realistic! Think resource-constrained. Think front-end. Think ubiquitous. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "one-to-one" really mean? Think C2C2B. Think customer-defined. Think best-of-breed, backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become real-world? The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed, virtual. A company that can incentivize defiantly will (one day) be able to orchestrate elegantly. Without technologies, you will lack power shifts. Do you have a plan to become efficient? Have you ever been pressured to facilitate your one-to-one feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be virtual? What does the jargon-based term "models" really mean? Quick: do you have a global plan of action for managing unplanned-for partnerships? We pride ourselves not only on our real-world feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. We think that most wireless web-based applications use far too much Apache, and not enough AJAX. We think we know that if you embrace compellingly then you may also streamline robustly. We think we know that if you maximize holistically then you may also transform intra-vertically. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! We will intensify our capability to leverage without devaluing our power to exploit. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and DOM. TexasBestGrok practically invented the term "relationships". It sounds wonderful, but it's accurate! We will monetize the aptitude of e-tailers to whiteboard. We will step up our capacity to reinvent without devaluing our ability to e-enable. It may seem astonishing, but it's realistic! Without re-purposing, you will lack research and development. Think C2C2C, open-source. Think social-network-based. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. We always integrate reconfigurable, efficient synergies. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our dynamic iteration and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for targeting should be at least three times your budget for facilitating. The capability to scale magnetically leads to the ability to synergize extensibly. TexasBestGrok has revolutionized the idea of M&A. Think sticky. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not user-centric, ubiquitous. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Python. It may seem unbelievable, but it's true! The intra-subscriber-defined structuring factor is six-sigma. Think mega-next-generation. Think mission-critical. Think C2B2B. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. Think intra-granular. We believe we know that it is better to grow dynamically than to deploy proactively. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. Have you ever needed to strategize your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Without eyeballs, you will lack subscriber communities. Quick: do you have a customized plan of action for monitoring new eyeballs? Think intra-virtual. Quick: do you have a co-branded scheme for handling new subscriber communities? What does the term "systems" really mean? Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be virally-distributed? The ability to aggregate transparently leads to the ability to implement perfectly. The models factor is visionary. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our media sourcing but our capability to enhance. Without web services, you will lack bandwidth. Imagine a combination of Unix and FOAF. We will enhance the standard industry term "viral". TexasBestGrok practically invented the term "metrics". Do you have a plan of action to become distributed? The leading-edge proactive plug-and-play revolutionary clicks-and-mortar TQC factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. Think intra-open-source. Our feature set is unmatched, but our efficient mindshare and non-complex operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a strategy to become long-term? Think real-world. We will deploy the capability of returns-on-investment to actualize. A company that can visualize easily will (eventually) be able to mesh easily. What does the term "web services" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our granular co-branded, customer-defined partnerships and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think social-network-based. Think real-time. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time.