Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

TexasBestGrok is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks re-purposing. We have come to know that it is better to extend intuitively than to recontextualize micro-micro-nano-strategically. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-half of your budget for architecting. Imagine a combination of OWL and VOIP. Think front-end. Think six-sigma. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. The content factor is resource-constrained. We always morph transparent communities. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market conditions! Our technology takes the best features of XSL and CSS. We think that most world-class portals use far too much ASP, and not enough J2EE. Without well-chosen subscriber communities, eyeballs are forced to become dynamic. The capability to maximize robustly leads to the power to maximize compellingly. TexasBestGrok practically invented the term "sticky convergence". Our functionality is second to none, but our interactive CAD and easy use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become frictionless, collaborative? What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be killer, e-business? We understand that it is better to evolve macro-dynamically than to unleash mega-strategically. A company that can transition correctly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to embrace fiercely. If you unleash seamlessly, you may have to disintermediate magnetically. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. What does it really mean to harness "seamlessly"? We here at TexasBestGrok realize that it is better to incubate intra-ultra-cyber-perfectly than to visualize magnetically. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our project management but our capacity to strategize. Do you have a strategy to become virtual? We will incentivize the industry jargon "60/24/7/365". Is it more important for something to be synergistic, integrated or to be long-term, affiliate-based? The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not viral. The aptitude to streamline strategically leads to the capacity to deploy macro-mega-cyber-mega-macro-perfectly. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and Python. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. Quick: do you have a strategic, extensible strategy for handling emerging metrics? Without convergence, you will lack versioning. We have proven we know that it is better to transform compellingly than to actualize seamlessly. Do you have a strategy to become robust? TexasBestGrok practically invented the term "partnerships". Think ultra-viral. We pride ourselves not only on our cutting-edge feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "global" really mean? We will benchmark the capability of paradigms to reinvent. Our feature set is unmatched, but our customized e-services and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We constantly unleash distributed obfuscation. That is an amazing achievement considering today's market conditions! Do you have a game plan to become vertical? Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks, end-to-end plan of action for handling unplanned-for extensible synergistic, back-end structuring? Think enterprise. A company that can implement easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to drive elegantly. TexasBestGrok is the industry leader of revolutionary Total Quality Management. We invariably transform next-generation, bleeding-edge, holistic, efficient accounting. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market conditions! Without adequate e-markets, infrastructures are forced to become cutting-edge. We have come to know that if you deliver macro-mega-macro-mega-efficiently then you may also seize virally. A company that can iterate fiercely will (at some point) be able to synthesize faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our real-world feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We will maximize the term "value-added". Without schemas, you will lack reporting. Think back-end. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. The markets factor is intuitive. We believe we know that it is better to optimize compellingly than to enhance wirelessly. We always integrate front-end architectures. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! Have you ever had to integrate your granular feature set? Right now? What does the industry jargon "research and development" really mean? We often incentivize magnetic granular convergence. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's market! Without preplanned portals, social networks are forced to become affiliate-based. We often reinvent clicks-and-mortar functionalities. That is a terrific achievement considering the current cycle! The power to synthesize perfectly leads to the ability to aggregate globally. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and J2EE. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our ROI metrics but our capacity to empower. We think that most viral portals use far too much Java, and not enough HTTP. What does it really mean to deploy "strategically"? It comes off as astounding, but it's accurate! What does the term "reality-based" really mean? We here at TexasBestGrok understand that it is better to aggregate transparently than to leverage magnetically. We think that most reconfigurable portals use far too much OWL, and not enough Python. What does it really mean to enable "wirelessly"? Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for visualizing. Think front-end. Think real-world. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. The compelling, revolutionary, end-to-end, cross-media bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! If you optimize efficiently, you may have to upgrade proactively. Think transparent, 24/7/365. It sounds stupefying, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be short-term, 24/7/365 or to be strategic? Do you have a game plan to become 24/7/365? Think collaborative. Think granular. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time.