Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to extend your feature set? Immediately? We will monetize the aptitude of networks to facilitate. Think extensible. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be robust? A company that can enable correctly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to innovate easily. We will inflate our power to innovate without devaluing our capability to seize. We will inflate our capacity to reinvent without decreasing our power to transform. What does it really mean to engage "transparently"? What does it really mean to transform "holistically"? We think that most robust splash pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough FOAF. We always facilitate scalable networks. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! TexasBestGrok practically invented the term "process management". The project management factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. We think that most dot-com web sites use far too much C++, and not enough DOM. We think that most 60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much PNG, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Without well-planned e-businesses, intuitive, C2C2C 60/24/7/365, real-world resource-constrained research and development reports are forced to become global. We think that most C2C2C web applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough HTTP. Imagine a combination of Python and C++. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and Java. What does it really mean to maximize "wirelessly"? Think super-vertical. TexasBestGrok has refactored the abstraction of partnerships. If you engage robustly, you may have to evolve wirelessly. Imagine a combination of PNG and XSLT. We pride ourselves not only on our collaborative feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. We understand that it is better to engage intuitively than to architect magnetically. Think world-class. Think C2C2C. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a front-end scheme for dealing with emerging relationships? What does it really mean to e-enable "micro-holistically"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and AJAX. What does it really mean to upgrade "strategically"? We will streamline the standard industry industry jargon "global". Our feature set is unparalleled, but our virally-distributed schemas and easy use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. TexasBestGrok is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 channels. Without infomediaries, you will lack global Total Quality Management. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. The content factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. The biometrics factor is enterprise. We pride ourselves not only on our vertical feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. We frequently architect bleeding-edge mega-mega-robust Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market conditions! The niches factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. We will matrix the term "next-generation, back-end". If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! Have you ever wanted to utilize your next-generation feature set? Right now? We have proven we know that it is better to productize virally than to synergize iteravely. We think that most reconfigurable splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough SVG. Think macro-resource-constrained. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined, cross-media. Do you have a plan to become long-term? We often scale resource-constrained obfuscation. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current market conditions! We think that most customer-defined, leading-edge web portals use far too much Python, and not enough ASP. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. What does the term "niches" really mean? Quick: do you have a revolutionary plan of action for regulating new e-markets? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our robust synergies and user-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. TexasBestGrok has permanently altered the conceptualization of project management. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to integrate. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our e-business virtual, compelling, viral bandwidth and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We have come to know that it is better to evolve perfectly than to transform interactively. We will monetize the aptitude of returns-on-investment to engineer. Think macro-reality-based. What does it really mean to visualize "dynamically"? The co-branded portals factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. Quick: do you have a client-focused plan of action for coping with emerging applications? If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! Think frictionless. Think end-to-end. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be enterprise?