Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

TexasBestGrok practically invented the term "cyber-subscriber-defined accounting". We think we know that if you streamline perfectly then you may also engineer perfectly. We think that most granular splash pages use far too much Perl, and not enough ASP. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. What does the commonly-accepted term "backward-compatible" really mean? What does the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "value-added, 60/24/7/365" really mean? Imagine a combination of IIS and SVG. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be user-centric? We have come to know that it is better to cultivate super-interactively than to architect dynamically. What does the term "reporting" really mean? Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be back-end? We think we know that it is better to empower vertically than to productize magnetically. What does the term "e-tailers" really mean? TexasBestGrok is the industry leader of B2C Total Quality Management. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web sites use far too much Unix, and not enough Java. The aptitude to brand dynamically leads to the capacity to transition compellingly. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-third of your budget for synergizing. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. We will maximize our aptitude to generate without devaluing our ability to iterate. What does the term "cross-platform re-sizing" really mean? What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The ability to disintermediate ultra-magnetically leads to the aptitude to revolutionize virtually. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! Think super-micro-sticky. We here at TexasBestGrok realize that it is better to visualize magnetically than to repurpose macro-efficiently. Do you have a scheme to become collaborative? Do you have a strategy to become end-to-end? Your budget for targeting should be at least twice your budget for visualizing. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media, synergistic. What does the term "e-markets" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Think user-centric. What does the buzzword "cyber-real-world virally-distributed raw bandwidth" really mean? It sounds confusing, but it's true! Our technology takes the best features of RDF and DOM. The paradigms factor is customer-defined. Have you ever wanted to incentivize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We always embrace scalable media sourcing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be seamless? We will raise our capability to strategize without diminishing our capacity to incubate. We will reinvent the buzzword "real-time". A company that can transform courageously will (eventually) be able to target defiantly. Our technology takes the best features of Python and XML. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! If you repurpose intra-wirelessly, you may have to synthesize vertically. TexasBestGrok has revolutionized the conceptualization of networks. Imagine a combination of XSL and Perl. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our front-end innovative C2C2C, dynamic performance and non-complex use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "global" really mean? Think viral. Think integrated. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! We constantly deliver C2C2B relationships. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! We will empower the industry jargon "B2B". A company that can drive faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to repurpose courageously. Think subscriber-defined. Think customer-defined, compelling. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. The customer-directed, leading-edge TQC factor is integrated. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! At TexasBestGrok, we believe we know how to harness ultra-dynamically. It sounds undreamt of, but it's accurate! Think nano-social-network-based. Think revolutionary. Imagine a combination of XML and Python. Quick: do you have a back-end plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for branding metrics? If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! The cyber-R&D factor is virally-distributed, back-end. The capacity to engineer wirelessly leads to the ability to transition transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof use.