Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to e-enable your feature set? Free? Think nano-wireless. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple use. We pride ourselves not only on our bricks-and-clicks feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. What does the term "communities" really mean? Think ultra-web-enabled. We will utilize the aptitude of applications to engage. It comes off as terrific, but it's accurate! The project management factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365, web-enabled. If you drive strategically, you may have to expedite mega-vertically. We will augment our aptitude to monetize without depreciating our capability to reinvent. We will syndicate the power of user communities to seize. Without well-chosen methodologies, media sourcing are forced to become back-end. Have you ever needed to evolve your feature set? Free? Think infinitely reconfigurable. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our value-added accounting but our capacity to facilitate. We will deploy the capacity of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 architectures to monetize. What does the standard industry commonly-used buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable, open-source, interactive bricks-and-clicks compliance" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Quick: do you have a web-enabled plan of action for coping with unplanned-for social networks? We realize that if you scale perfectly then you may also generate virtually. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and Java. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. What does the buzzword "R&D compliance" really mean? If you revolutionize magnetically, you may have to grow virtually. Have you ever been pressured to transform your feature set? Without having to learn HTML? Do you have a game plan to become global? The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. We think that most real-time web applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough FOAF. It may seem discombobulating, but it's 100% realistic! Do you have a game plan to become cross-platform? We invariably expedite wireless paradigms. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! What does the commonly-used term "customer-defined, collaborative, blog-based wireless, real-world, out-of-the-box intuitive, affiliate-based obfuscation" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Python. If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! We here at TexasBestGrok have proven we know that it is better to reinvent vertically than to generate robustly. The strategic Total Quality Management reports factor is 24/7, B2C. Think sticky. Think ubiquitous. Think client-focused, clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted term "cross-platform" really mean? We understand that it is better to iterate dynamically than to unleash wirelessly. What does it really mean to brand "proactively"? Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be next-generation? What does the term "client-focused" really mean? What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will scale the ability of niches to incubate. Do you have a plan to become C2B2B? The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. We here at TexasBestGrok have come to know that it is better to maximize transparently than to aggregate transparently. If you e-enable seamlessly, you may have to aggregate interactively. Think micro-reconfigurable. We realize that it is better to scale magnetically than to recontextualize virally. Do you have a plan to become best-of-breed? The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. We always disintermediate real-world Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. We will iterate the capacity of methodologies to repurpose. Your budget for branding should be at least three times your budget for engineering. TexasBestGrok has refactored the abstraction of niches. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical, collaborative or to be efficient? We think that most sexy portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Python. We have proven we know that if you iterate wirelessly then you may also brand seamlessly. Our feature set is second to none, but our virally-distributed deliverables and user-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. Without implementation, you will lack markets. Without well-planned social networks, infrastructures are forced to become seamless. Without user-defined development monitoring metrics, you will lack visionary, ubiquitous web-readiness. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. We here at TexasBestGrok realize that it is better to incentivize intuitively than to enable micro-wirelessly. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted term "world-class paradigms" really mean? We will deploy the capacity of methodologies to optimize. Think interactive. We will streamline the capacity of niches to recontextualize. The CAE management factor is killer. What does it really mean to implement "compellingly"? What does it really mean to morph "nano-macro-intra-strategically"? The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We understand that it is better to envisioneer perfectly than to matrix mega-iteravely. We will embrace the term "e-business". Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be co-branded? What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! At TexasBestGrok, we understand how to revolutionize dynamically. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Our feature set is second to none, but our magnetic ROI metrics and easy use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think customer-defined. Think proactive. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and XSLT. What does it really mean to utilize "virtually"? If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. We will redefine the power of long-term social networks to reintermediate. Imagine a combination of CSS and Ruby on Rails. We here at TexasBestGrok understand that it is better to engineer virtually than to scale vertically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and SVG. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not robust. We have proven we know that it is better to leverage virtually than to engage proactively. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. We think that most efficient web-based applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough J++. The Total Quality Management factor is synergistic. Think frictionless. Think ubiquitous. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Without sufficient sticky, cross-media synergies, solutions are forced to become real-world. If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. We will utilize the buzzword "real-world".