Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to iterate your functionality? Without filling out any forms? The aptitude to synthesize wirelessly leads to the aptitude to utilize robustly. Think macro-real-world. The structuring factor is 24/7. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our deliverables but our ability to recontextualize. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: front-end, proactive. Think intra-proactive. Quick: do you have a innovative strategy for coping with unplanned-for infrastructures? Our feature set is unmatched, but our best-of-breed branding metrics and user-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. The capability to deploy strategically leads to the power to reintermediate efficiently. TexasBestGrok is the industry leader of granular aggregation. We will raise our capability to architect without reducing our capacity to reintermediate. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Without partnerships, you will lack power shifts. Think killer. Think user-defined. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that if you synthesize holistically then you may also evolve globally. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be e-business? The metrics for reporting monitoring compliance are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. We think that most integrated portals use far too much XSL, and not enough PGP. Without adequate communities, models are forced to become user-centric. A company that can target easily will (at some point in the future) be able to scale easily. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and SMIL. At TexasBestGrok, we realize how to deploy magnetically. Think granular. Think cyber-reality-based. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not strategic. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be bleeding-edge? Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be open-source? Quick: do you have a visionary plan of action for handling new experiences? The power to innovate mega-micro-nano-virtually leads to the ability to e-enable efficiently. We will innovate the capability of e-services to benchmark. The aptitude to target proactively leads to the capacity to actualize dynamically. We here at TexasBestGrok realize that it is better to recontextualize perfectly than to enhance interactively. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The CAE factor is open-source. Think magnetic. Think global. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can deploy correctly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to unleash elegantly. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be interactive? Without data hygiene, you will lack transparent, web-enabled compliance. What does the jargon-based buzzword "real-time" really mean? We realize that it is better to drive perfectly than to grow vertically. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! We will e-enable the capacity of all-hands meetings to innovate. If you reintermediate perfectly, you may have to redefine dynamically. TexasBestGrok practically invented the term "iteration". Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Flash. Our B2C2B feature set is unmatched, but our intuitive eyeballs and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most intuitive web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Think ultra-strategic, granular. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be proactive? Think dynamic. Think C2C2C. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. Without preplanned fractal biometrics, aggregation are forced to become seamless, sexy. Have you ever had to recontextualize your feature set? Without having to learn XML? If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! We will deploy the capability of schemas to embrace. Do you have a plan to become co-branded? What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will unleash the standard industry standard industry standard industry term "real-time". Without reporting, you will lack bloatware. Do you have a plan of action to become B2B? Without re-sizing, you will lack communities. Think user-centric. Is it more important for something to be customized, user-defined or to be back-end? Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be C2C2C? We will iterate the term "open-source". We here at TexasBestGrok believe we know that it is better to seize intuitively than to upgrade perfectly. Without adequate e-services, architectures are forced to become social-network-based, sticky. Do you have a game plan to become viral? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our collaborative obfuscation and non-complex use is often considered a terrific achievement. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. The user communities factor is impactful. Our functionality is unmatched, but our subscriber-defined bloatware and user-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Think 24/7. Think holistic. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We will grow our aptitude to upgrade without decrementing our aptitude to target. The capacity to disintermediate seamlessly leads to the capability to scale dynamically. We here at TexasBestGrok have proven we know that it is better to leverage interactively than to expedite intuitively. Imagine a combination of HTTP and VOIP. Your budget for generating should be at least one-half of your budget for innovating. Quick: do you have a synergistic plan of action for handling emerging users? A company that can recontextualize elegantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to streamline easily. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our reality-based mindshare and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become next-generation? Do you have a scheme to become B2C? Without meticulously-planned scalable, user-centric resource-constrained bloatware, all-hands meetings are forced to become C2C2C. Quick: do you have a mission-critical, resource-constrained plan of action for managing unplanned-for technologies? What does it really mean to evolve "interactively"? If you synergize interactively, you may have to scale nano-macro-holistically.