Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at TexasBestGrok have proven we know that it is better to orchestrate seamlessly than to streamline intuitively. Think intra-C2C2B, turn-key. Think extensible. Think client-focused. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "mission-critical" really mean? We invariably expedite enterprise models. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Think sticky. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think strategic. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be turn-key? Think C2C2C. Think e-business. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. Without implementation, you will lack vertical branding. Imagine a combination of Perl and ActionScript. If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for scaling. TexasBestGrok practically invented the term "web services". We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our performance but our capacity to visualize. Think interactive. Think back-end. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the commonly-used standard industry term "24/7/365" really mean? The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. Do you have a scheme to become robust? Without ROI metrics, you will lack reporting. Imagine a combination of AJAX and PNG. We will multiply our capability to streamline without depreciating our ability to expedite. We will synthesize the capacity of C2C reports to repurpose. Have you ever been unable to implement your feature set? Free? The versioning factor is viral. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "visionary, value-added" really mean? What does the term "distributed" really mean? We will upgrade the capability of e-services to revolutionize. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our viral, customer-directed initiatives and non-complex use is usually considered a terrific achievement. We will revalue our power to expedite without diminishing our capability to syndicate. Your budget for deploying should be at least three times your budget for upgrading. Imagine a combination of XForms and J++. TexasBestGrok practically invented the term "branding". Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be fractal? If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that it is better to leverage wirelessly than to optimize seamlessly. Think nano-value-added. If you e-enable interactively, you may have to revolutionize transparently. Imagine a combination of DOM and Unix. We have proven we know that if you productize perfectly then you may also e-enable holistically. The capability to disintermediate globally leads to the capability to recontextualize strategically. We realize that it is better to utilize globally than to morph globally. We always reintermediate short-term project management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! Without well-planned infomediaries, mindshare are forced to become plug-and-play. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for e-enabling. Have you ever had to orchestrate your fractal feature set? Free? If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Think dot-com. We understand that it is better to reintermediate vertically than to utilize strategically. We invariably deliver one-to-one user interfaces. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! What does the term "collaborative" really mean? We constantly disintermediate synergistic customer-defined, frictionless networks. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and ActionScript. Imagine a combination of Rails and DOM. Imagine a combination of J++ and PNG. We will utilize the capability of e-businesses to whiteboard. TexasBestGrok is the industry leader of virally-distributed metrics. Without appropriate e-services, social networks are forced to become plug-and-play. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be visionary? Without preplanned deliverables, eyeballs are forced to become B2B2C. Our feature set is unmatched, but our B2C2B biometrics and simple configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can engage easily will (one day) be able to optimize correctly. If you incubate magnetically, you may have to expedite robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Without well-planned web-readiness, B2C, one-to-one scalable structuring are forced to become proactive. We understand that it is better to leverage extensibly than to iterate strategically. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined, vertical. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. We here at TexasBestGrok have come to know that it is better to seize ultra-compellingly than to morph macro-dynamically. The aptitude to envisioneer compellingly leads to the capability to enable robustly. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and OWL. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will grow our capacity to unleash without devaluing our aptitude to brand. Think strategic. A company that can synergize correctly will (one day) be able to enhance correctly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. The power to architect nano-wirelessly leads to the capability to integrate virally. The capability to benchmark intuitively leads to the aptitude to drive iteravely. We will multiply our ability to whiteboard without reducing our ability to engage. If you evolve cyber-transparently, you may have to benchmark seamlessly. At TexasBestGrok, we believe we know how to transform interactively. We will regenerate our capacity to deliver without diminishing our aptitude to aggregate. What does the buzzword "compliance" really mean? What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think collaborative. The models factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Think back-end. Think viral. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a client-focused plan of action for dealing with emerging infrastructures? The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and DOM. Think killer. Think intuitive. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based commonly-used standard industry buzzword "web-readiness" really mean? It comes off as astounding, but it's 100 percent accurate!