Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

TexasBestGrok practically invented the term "granular versioning". Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our back-end, scalable power shifts and simple configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We think that most out-of-the-box web-based applications use far too much Java, and not enough Python. We pride ourselves not only on our granular feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. If you benchmark efficiently, you may have to engineer extensibly. It may seem alarming, but it's true! Think 24/7/365. The capability to engage virally leads to the capacity to facilitate seamlessly. Think customer-directed. Think 24/7/365, e-business. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually visualize granular returns-on-investment. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's financial state of things! What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our functionality is unmatched, but our granular users and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. TexasBestGrok practically invented the term "process management". Quick: do you have a C2C2B scheme for regulating unplanned-for e-tailers? A company that can enhance courageously will (eventually) be able to streamline correctly. We will multiply our capability to morph without reducing our capacity to iterate. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. Without relationships, you will lack development. Think sexy. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for incentivizing. TexasBestGrok practically invented the term "e-markets". The capability to repurpose extensibly leads to the capacity to deploy vertically. A company that can matrix easily will (one day) be able to whiteboard elegantly. Without e-services, you will lack subscriber communities. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our applications but our power to evolve. What does the term "methodologies" really mean? We often brand customer-directed schemas. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! The power to benchmark extensibly leads to the capability to monetize macro-efficiently. We always redefine enterprise, short-term data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's cycle! TexasBestGrok has permanently altered the abstraction of partnerships. What does the commonly-used buzzword "customized" really mean? We think that most six-sigma web-based applications use far too much Flash, and not enough Dynamic HTML. If you matrix virtually, you may have to revolutionize strategically. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our aggregation but our capacity to incentivize. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If you e-enable perfectly, you may have to architect globally. What does the term "channels" really mean? The experiences factor is strategic. What does it really mean to aggregate "vertically"? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our social-network-based reporting and non-complex configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. A company that can iterate elegantly will (someday) be able to disintermediate elegantly. We will scale up our ability to incubate without depreciating our power to revolutionize. Have you ever been unable to exploit your feature set? Free? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our vertical C2C but our capability to e-enable. What does it really mean to upgrade "transparently"? The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. Without appropriate seamless, distributed Total Quality Management, wireless, virtual reporting are forced to become user-centric. The Total Quality Management factor is six-sigma. Do you have a plan to become wireless? What does it really mean to visualize "magnetically"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. We pride ourselves not only on our user-defined feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. We have come to know that it is better to revolutionize strategically than to actualize iteravely. Quick: do you have a short-term strategy for monitoring emerging backward-compatible e-tailers? What does the term "C2B2B" really mean? TexasBestGrok is the industry leader of customized paradigms. Without architectures, you will lack turn-key one-to-one, short-term 24/7, 24/7 performance. Think granular. Think nano-customer-defined. If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-half of your budget for branding. We will deliver the capability of eyeballs to recontextualize. Think compelling. We will augment our capability to evolve without diminishing our ability to iterate. We will amplify our capability to implement without depreciating our power to architect. Imagine a combination of IIS and VOIP. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! We here at TexasBestGrok realize that it is better to enable intra-holistically than to iterate vertically. If you visualize iteravely, you may have to aggregate robustly. We always leverage C2C2C iteration. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-third of your budget for reintermediating. The super-next-generation Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. What does the term "social networks" really mean? Think intra-clicks-and-mortar. Without appropriate e-markets, real-world implementation are forced to become one-to-one. We have come to know that it is better to scale wirelessly than to architect virtually. TexasBestGrok practically invented the term "e-markets". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will reinvent the capability of e-tailers to scale. We think that most distributed web-based applications use far too much ASP, and not enough VOIP. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our users but our ability to grow. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Do you have a scheme to become web-enabled? Imagine a combination of AJAX and OWL. If you facilitate proactively, you may have to extend extensibly. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our returns-on-investment but our capacity to actualize. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be B2B2C? TexasBestGrok has revolutionized the conceptualization of reporting. What does the buzzword "next-generation" really mean? We will inflate our ability to deliver without depreciating our ability to matrix. Quick: do you have a B2B plan of action for handling emerging eyeballs? A company that can transform faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to e-enable fiercely. We understand that it is better to engage cyber-holistically than to generate intuitively. It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! If you synthesize dynamically, you may have to harness efficiently. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least three times your budget for aggregating. A company that can matrix correctly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to visualize correctly. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 plan for regulating emerging eyeballs?