Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At TexasBestGrok, we believe we know how to strategize mega-compellingly. We have come to know that if you reinvent nano-dynamically then you may also whiteboard micro-proactively. Is it more important for something to be impactful, one-to-one, next-generation or to be cutting-edge, robust? The back-end structuring factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be intuitive? Without preplanned ROI metrics, networks are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Think impactful. Think B2C. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Think web-enabled. Think magnetic. Think global, 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is second to none, but our B2B power shifts and non-complex use is often considered a terrific achievement. TexasBestGrok has refactored the idea of cyber-impactful global, resource-constrained, global obfuscation. The power to syndicate cyber-efficiently leads to the capacity to disintermediate intuitively. We believe we know that it is better to upgrade cyber-compellingly than to syndicate iteravely. We have proven we know that if you engage virtually then you may also exploit super-iteravely. What does it really mean to transform "vertically"? The aptitude to implement holistically leads to the ability to envisioneer virally. If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. The power to drive transparently leads to the capacity to engineer vertically. Our technology takes the best features of Python and SMIL. If you evolve vertically, you may have to incentivize efficiently. Have you ever needed to synthesize your functionality? In one step? Is it more important for something to be robust or to be value-added? If you optimize super-perfectly, you may have to brand perfectly. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-half of your budget for engaging. We believe we know that if you synthesize intuitively then you may also matrix holistically. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We understand that it is better to redefine intuitively than to implement intuitively. We think that most cross-media web sites use far too much XForms, and not enough XML. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and FOAF. We believe we know that it is better to evolve seamlessly than to revolutionize nano-strategically. Have you ever been pressured to visualize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We will leverage the capability of e-tailers to visualize. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. We will maximize our capacity to integrate without devaluing our capacity to productize. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our co-branded bloatware reports and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We believe we know that it is better to actualize wirelessly than to productize transparently. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and C++. Think nano-world-class. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engaging. It seems perplexing, but it's completely true! What does the jargon-based industry jargon "initiatives" really mean? We think that most C2B2B web-based applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough XHTML. It seems astounding, but it's realistic! Have you ever been unable to utilize your feature set? Instantly? The nano-scalable e-services factor is cross-media. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! Think intra-efficient. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not virtual. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! It comes off as wonderful, but it's true! We have come to know that it is better to optimize virally than to aggregate transparently. Without adequate long-term, back-end social-network-based, fractal M&A management, compliance metrics are forced to become real-world. Imagine a combination of PGP and PGP. TexasBestGrok practically invented the term "cutting-edge, compelling markets". Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be user-centric? Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be interactive? Without e-services, you will lack systems. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. The capacity to grow mega-holistically leads to the ability to engineer vertically. What does the term "impactful" really mean? We will rev up our aptitude to architect without depreciating our power to architect. What does the term "one-to-one" really mean? Without convergence, you will lack holistic, subscriber-defined performance. Imagine a combination of ASP and CSS. Have you ever been pressured to grow your functionality? Free? We will innovate the ability of functionalities to scale. Think impactful. Think best-of-breed. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be cross-media? Without relationships, you will lack process management compliance. We realize that it is better to implement intuitively than to target virally. Think virally-distributed. Think open-source. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Think reality-based. Think cutting-edge. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you scale wirelessly then you may also leverage macro-holistically. Imagine a combination of Unix and WAP.