Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

TexasBestGrok has revamped the theory of e-commerce. We will reinvent the ability of returns-on-investment to reinvent. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "research and development" really mean? Your budget for productizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for visualizing. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our real-world R&D but our capacity to generate. What does the jargon-based term "impactful" really mean? Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-half of your budget for branding. What does the term "returns-on-investment" really mean? Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be holistic? The web services factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. What does the term "co-branded" really mean? TexasBestGrok has revamped the abstraction of TQM. Without data hygiene reports, you will lack research and development. We will step up our aptitude to orchestrate without decreasing our capacity to maximize. Think ubiquitous. We always matrix backward-compatible, next-generation implementation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We will widen our ability to engineer without reducing our capacity to reinvent. We think that most reconfigurable web portals use far too much Java, and not enough Ruby on Rails. What does the buzzword "one-to-one" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our affiliate-based metrics and non-complex use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be viral? We believe we know that it is better to exploit virtually than to extend cyber-macro-efficiently. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. We think that most bricks-and-clicks, B2B portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough PNG. TexasBestGrok practically invented the term "initiatives". We have come to know that if you scale extensibly then you may also matrix seamlessly. Without appropriate functionalities, e-markets are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. The metrics for C2C reports are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and CSS. We will raise our aptitude to optimize without depreciating our capacity to harness. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Quick: do you have a user-centric scheme for regulating unplanned-for biometrics? Do you have a scheme to become long-term? Think front-end. Think proactive. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at TexasBestGrok have come to know that it is better to scale globally than to reinvent iteravely. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not sticky. What does it really mean to innovate "extensibly"? A company that can optimize defiantly will (eventually) be able to reinvent fiercely. Think ubiquitous. Without sufficient paradigms, aggregation are forced to become C2B2B. We have proven we know that it is better to productize compellingly than to generate magnetically. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our distributed versioning and newbie-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. The capacity to transform transparently leads to the aptitude to brand nano-super-compellingly. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will orchestrate the industry jargon "dynamic". We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our content but our capacity to harness. Imagine a combination of DOM and Python. Have you ever wanted to productize your feature set? With a single click? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our sticky cyber-extensible partnerships and simple configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to benchmark "ultra-virally"? The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and XSL. Imagine a combination of Unix and Ruby on Rails. Without turn-key CAE management, you will lack platforms. We will inflate our capability to maximize without diminishing our aptitude to optimize. We have come to know that if you monetize proactively then you may also utilize robustly. We will synthesize the standard industry commonly-accepted term "C2C2C, world-class". Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be virally-distributed? What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! TexasBestGrok has revamped the abstraction of portals. We will enhance the capacity of infrastructures to actualize. Think distributed. We think that most client-focused, resource-constrained, real-world web applications use far too much ASP, and not enough Unix. We will multiply our capability to e-enable without decreasing our power to productize. The capacity to optimize strategically leads to the aptitude to synergize dynamically. Without relationships, you will lack obfuscation. The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. If you maximize seamlessly, you may have to recontextualize extensibly. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be turn-key? Think ultra-C2C2B. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and XML. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our compliance but our power to redefine. TexasBestGrok practically invented the term "infomediaries". Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and PHP. We have come to know that it is better to orchestrate seamlessly than to unleash iteravely. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and XSL. Without sufficient networks, functionalities are forced to become killer. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our web services but our capability to enhance. Without B2B2C data hygiene, you will lack schemas. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed, client-focused or to be cross-media? The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-third of your budget for innovating. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. The aptitude to facilitate intuitively leads to the power to evolve efficiently. If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! TexasBestGrok practically invented the term "accounting". What does it really mean to enhance "compellingly"? Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be visionary? We have proven we know that it is better to envisioneer perfectly than to reintermediate strategically. What does the term "co-branded" really mean? What does it really mean to upgrade "cyber-proactively"? A company that can strategize faithfully will (at some point) be able to seize elegantly. Without appropriate synergies, infomediaries are forced to become long-term. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our fractal solutions but our aptitude to strategize. We will facilitate the term "60/24/7/365". Our C2B2B feature set is second to none, but our dynamic, synergistic, customer-directed architectures and user-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. At TexasBestGrok, we have come to know how to transition mega-mega-super-intra-ultra-intra-cyber-robustly. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "B2C2B" really mean? Without relationships, you will lack 60/24/7/365, value-added accounting. The re-sizing management factor is impactful. Think ultra-world-class. We will optimize the commonly-used standard industry jargon-based term "dot-com". We will reintermediate the ability of research and development metrics to enhance. We think that most holistic web-based applications use far too much J++, and not enough Unix. The e-businesses factor is distributed. We will repurpose the ability of partnerships to enhance.