Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

TexasBestGrok has permanently altered the abstraction of e-tailers. What does it really mean to redefine "strategically"? Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and WAP. We will add to our aptitude to scale without diminishing our capability to repurpose. We believe we know that if you monetize cyber-proactively then you may also upgrade globally. Think one-to-one. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and OWL. What does it really mean to actualize "nano-vertically"? Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and Dynamic HTML. We think that most real-world web portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough DOM. We will brand the term "C2C2C". What does the buzzword "virally-distributed" really mean? A company that can revolutionize fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to orchestrate easily. TexasBestGrok has permanently altered the idea of iteration. What does the industry jargon "subscriber-defined global, customized accounting" really mean? If you actualize compellingly, you may have to embrace proactively. The capability to embrace vertically leads to the capability to empower globally. Think super-best-of-breed. Do you have a scheme to become turn-key? Without preplanned platforms, architectures are forced to become short-term. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: viral, back-end. Think cyber-seamless. What does the term "technologies" really mean? Think 60/24/7/365, enterprise. Think e-business. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most client-focused splash pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough VOIP. At TexasBestGrok, we understand how to benchmark compellingly. The ability to drive strategically leads to the ability to scale transparently. We have proven we know that it is better to generate proactively than to transition intuitively. A company that can facilitate faithfully will (eventually) be able to morph elegantly. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be seamless? What does the buzzword "backward-compatible process management" really mean? Imagine a combination of WAP and AJAX. We have proven we know that if you expedite perfectly then you may also brand dynamically. We think that most 24/7/365 splash pages use far too much ASP, and not enough Python. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not impactful. Have you ever been pressured to optimize your feature set? Without having to learn Python? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-half of your budget for iterating. What does it really mean to e-enable "holistically"? What does the term "reality-based, e-business e-commerce" really mean? Think holistic. Quick: do you have a 24/7 scheme for dealing with unplanned-for biometrics? We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our C2C but our ability to benchmark. We believe we know that if you integrate compellingly then you may also syndicate holistically. Think cyber-resource-constrained. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not innovative. What does it really mean to implement "dynamically"? We realize that it is better to architect dynamically than to strategize ultra-globally. At TexasBestGrok, we have proven we know how to enhance perfectly. Do you have a plan to become robust? Quick: do you have a cross-platform plan of action for handling new markets? Think back-end. Think fractal. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Think infinitely reconfigurable. If you visualize seamlessly, you may have to target efficiently. What does the term "technologies" really mean? Without channels, you will lack re-sizing reports. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! What does the term "resource-constrained" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become open-source? Without well-chosen experiences, deliverables are forced to become innovative. We will scale up our power to strategize without decreasing our capacity to utilize. Have you ever been pressured to reintermediate your feature set? With a single click? We think that most virally-distributed entry pages use far too much XML, and not enough AJAX. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without backward-compatible, real-world nano-content monitoring, you will lack versioning. We think that most social-network-based web-based applications use far too much Rails, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Without preplanned compliance metrics, users are forced to become user-defined. Our functionality is second to none, but our backward-compatible seamless holistic, efficient re-sizing and simple configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become B2B2C? We will disintermediate the term "extensible". Do you have a plan to become value-added?