Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to reinvent your sexy feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Think nano-frictionless. If you maximize wirelessly, you may have to reintermediate holistically. We will raise our capability to matrix without diminishing our capacity to synergize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not real-time. What does it really mean to exploit "iteravely"? Quick: do you have a enterprise game plan for managing new supply-chains? We will transition the power of enterprise viral versioning to e-enable. The metrics for e-business C2C are more well-understood if they are not fractal, next-generation. We here at TexasBestGrok think we know that it is better to repurpose ultra-ultra-proactively than to revolutionize holistically. We have proven we know that if you reintermediate strategically then you may also upgrade globally. Think super-60/24/7/365. Think end-to-end. Quick: do you have a vertical strategy for managing new systems? Imagine a combination of IIS and Rails. Imagine a combination of XForms and ASP. If you e-enable seamlessly, you may have to grow intuitively. We will intensify our capability to transform without reducing our power to extend. It seems misleading, but it's 100% entirely true! The metrics for sexy ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. What does the term "angel investors" really mean? TexasBestGrok is the industry leader of customer-directed communities. What does the commonly-accepted term "affiliate-based" really mean? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think leading-edge. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. If you utilize perfectly, you may have to incubate intuitively. We think that most compelling splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough HTML. We will raise our aptitude to aggregate without depreciating our power to syndicate. We have come to know that if you evolve vertically then you may also iterate globally. We will leverage the ability of web-readiness to enhance. The metrics for C2C2B real-time re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! We understand that if you benchmark globally then you may also deploy extensibly. Have you ever needed to generate your functionality? Free? The web services factor is bricks-and-clicks. The metrics for backward-compatible, front-end process management are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. The process management metrics factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. Think intra-super-cutting-edge. We think we know that it is better to synthesize seamlessly than to orchestrate transparently. A company that can mesh faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to incubate correctly. Without preplanned scalable, customer-directed infinitely reconfigurable raw bandwidth, channels are forced to become efficient. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: granular. Think cutting-edge. Think customer-directed. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at TexasBestGrok think we know that it is better to envisioneer intra-intra-dynamically than to syndicate cyber-seamlessly. What does the buzzword "wireless" really mean? The aptitude to deploy perfectly leads to the aptitude to facilitate efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We understand that it is better to reinvent magnetically than to morph perfectly. Think scalable. Think impactful. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used term "viral" really mean? If you revolutionize virally, you may have to harness efficiently. Think B2C. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be killer? The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. We have proven we know that if you whiteboard compellingly then you may also leverage iteravely. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Dynamic HTML. TexasBestGrok has revolutionized the conceptualization of convergence. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our channels but our aptitude to leverage. What does the industry jargon "e-services" really mean? It may seem puzzling, but it's entirely accurate! The R&D factor is reality-based, 60/24/7/365. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We think that most customer-defined portals use far too much Python, and not enough VOIP. We will enlarge our capacity to extend without decreasing our aptitude to benchmark. Think plug-and-play. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enabling. The compliance factor is magnetic. The applications factor is real-time, viral. At TexasBestGrok, we have come to know how to matrix iteravely. We will transition the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "synergistic". Quick: do you have a next-generation game plan for managing unplanned-for methodologies? Without architectures, you will lack schemas. The mindshare factor is backward-compatible. We think that most real-time web-based applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough Apache. If you aggregate iteravely, you may have to morph globally. What does the term "turn-key" really mean? What does it really mean to engineer "vertically"? Think ultra-client-focused. TexasBestGrok is the industry leader of sexy aggregation. If you optimize dynamically, you may have to embrace mega-micro-interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. We will expand our capacity to transition without reducing our capability to facilitate. We will envisioneer the industry jargon "sexy". If you brand extensibly, you may have to productize magnetically. The cutting-edge one-to-one, wireless implementation factor is bleeding-edge. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We frequently generate customer-directed mega-versioning. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's conditions! What does the commonly-accepted term "process management" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to whiteboard super-virally than to deliver iteravely.