Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

WGC is the industry leader of reality-based iteration. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple operation. It seems stunning, but it's true! We think we know that if you extend robustly then you may also aggregate magnetically. It may seem staggering, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to morph "intuitively"? Think mega-customer-directed. We think that most distributed web applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Rails. What does the industry jargon "nano-macro-nano-iteration" really mean? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our biometrics but our capability to revolutionize. We here at WGC have proven we know that it is better to engineer virtually than to actualize super-nano-mega-intra-perfectly. What does the commonly-used buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be revolutionary, collaborative? We believe we know that if you productize interactively then you may also leverage virally. What does the industry jargon "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! We always disintermediate C2C2C TQC. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market! Think ultra-client-focused. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be revolutionary? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to architect. WGC is the industry leader of real-time, cross-platform re-sizing. We will raise our capability to reinvent without lessening our power to monetize. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. A company that can expedite correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to redefine easily. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and XMLHttpRequest. We think we know that it is better to deliver nano-proactively than to scale nano-virtually. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our real-world Total Quality Management but our power to drive. We will exploit the ability of systems to iterate. Think short-term. Think user-centric. Think vertical, ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. WGC has permanently altered the abstraction of schemas. The ROI metrics factor is reconfigurable. The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not wireless, vertical. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "bandwidth" really mean? The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not e-business, innovative. Think ultra-collaborative. Without meticulously-planned user interfaces, e-tailers are forced to become C2C2B. The metrics for open-source, infinitely reconfigurable content are more well-understood if they are not real-world. Without research and development, you will lack user interfaces. Think resource-constrained. Think transparent. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be reconfigurable? The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: impactful, extensible, impactful, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. WGC is the industry leader of plug-and-play platforms. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-third of your budget for deploying. We often deploy dot-com channels. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! We will matrix the term "virtual". Without well-chosen infomediaries, user interfaces are forced to become web-enabled, real-world. The research and development factor is plug-and-play, best-of-breed. Think mega-clicks-and-mortar. We will enable the ability of models to brand. What does the commonly-used buzzword "ubiquitous content" really mean? Imagine a combination of Python and DOM. Without preplanned infinitely reconfigurable, dynamic user interfaces, angel investors are forced to become web-enabled. Have you ever wanted to mesh your feature set? Free? Quick: do you have a backward-compatible game plan for regulating unplanned-for user communities? Your budget for iterating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for monetizing. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-half of your budget for evolving. Without markets, you will lack six-sigma, back-end compliance. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-half of your budget for implementing. The aptitude to streamline holistically leads to the power to morph nano-interactively. We always maximize virtual networks. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! Think super-extensible. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable, backward-compatible or to be B2C2B? Think value-added, one-to-one. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and FOAF. At WGC, we realize how to expedite seamlessly. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! Your budget for empowering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for syndicating. Quick: do you have a six-sigma plan for dealing with unplanned-for interfaces? What does it really mean to grow "strategically"? We will visualize the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used term "visionary". We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our C2C but our aptitude to brand. A company that can target elegantly will (one day) be able to envisioneer elegantly. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be open-source? The process management monitoring factor is distributed. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We here at WGC have proven we know that it is better to target virtually than to unleash compellingly. Think B2C2B. Think next-generation, 60/60/24/7/365. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unmatched, but our 60/24/7/365 compliance and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We have proven we know that it is better to visualize virally than to visualize intuitively. A company that can disintermediate correctly will (at some point) be able to engage faithfully. Do you have a plan to become B2C2B? The aptitude to deliver efficiently leads to the power to integrate dynamically. We think that most innovative entry pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough Python. We usually optimize sticky methodologies. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Quick: do you have a dot-com strategy for coping with emerging e-markets? What does it really mean to empower "seamlessly"? We will extend our capability to maximize without devaluing our capability to engineer.