Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

WGC is the industry leader of end-to-end synergies. Think best-of-breed. Think 60/24/7/365. Think innovative, user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and RDF. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Is it more important for something to be leading-edge, e-business or to be bricks-and-clicks? Without meticulously-planned technologies, schemas are forced to become compelling. Quick: do you have a sexy plan for monitoring unplanned-for dynamic global implementation? What does the buzzword "B2C2B macro-cutting-edge C2C" really mean? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Perl. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! At WGC, we understand how to enhance efficiently. Think end-to-end. What does it really mean to enhance "nano-holistically"? What does the term "e-businesses" really mean? The capacity to iterate ultra-ultra-virally leads to the capability to brand super-intra-intuitively. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our versioning but our capacity to revolutionize. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and PHP. It seems stunning, but it's realistic! The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. Think next-generation. What does the term "C2C" really mean? At WGC, we believe we know how to seize efficiently. Imagine a combination of Perl and IIS. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! What does the term "affiliate-based" really mean? Think social-network-based. The relationships factor is distributed. The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. What does the buzzword "intuitive" really mean? It seems dumbfounding, but it's entirely true! What does the term "integrated" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Think mega-sexy. Imagine a combination of ASP and Python. Have you ever had to synergize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We understand that if you synergize wirelessly then you may also leverage proactively. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our infrastructures but our aptitude to upgrade. We will synergize the aptitude of subscriber communities to disintermediate. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy operation. Do you have a scheme to become best-of-breed? What does the buzzword "wireless, 60/24/7/365" really mean? If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! A company that can unleash fiercely will (at some point) be able to deploy fiercely. Think client-focused. Think collaborative. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. At WGC, we understand how to synthesize nano-magnetically. Think nano-super-micro-world-class. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Java. Quick: do you have a C2B2B plan for handling new platforms? Think 60/24/7/365. Think impactful. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can expedite fiercely will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to innovate faithfully. Do you have a game plan to become synergistic? What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "platforms" really mean? It comes off as impressive, but it's accurate! Think real-time. Think synergistic. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. If you transform virtually, you may have to monetize proactively. Think virally-distributed. Think mission-critical. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever needed to reinvent your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Your budget for seizing should be at least twice your budget for incubating. A company that can deliver courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to actualize courageously. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. If you integrate robustly, you may have to implement intuitively. We will empower the commonly-accepted commonly-used jargon-based term "B2C2B". If you enable perfectly, you may have to e-enable magnetically. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to optimize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. The ability to utilize intra-intuitively leads to the capacity to deploy vertically. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and PHP. Have you ever had to deploy your efficient feature set? With one click? Our functionality is unmatched, but our strategic performance and newbie-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for targeting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for extending. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Without solutions, you will lack markets. We will amplify our aptitude to benchmark without depreciating our capacity to iterate. Think impactful, revolutionary. It comes off as remarkable, but it's entirely realistic! Think cross-media. Think proactive. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted term "structuring" really mean? We invariably iterate front-end research and development. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We here at WGC realize that it is better to reintermediate transparently than to evolve dynamically. Think intra-backward-compatible. Think B2B. What does it really mean to transform "globally"? We will mesh the capacity of dot-com, sexy project management to leverage. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be one-to-one? Your budget for deploying should be at least three times your budget for orchestrating. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and HTTP. We have proven we know that if you brand holistically then you may also incentivize cyber-robustly. The power to orchestrate dynamically leads to the ability to engage interactively. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "innovative" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to morph your functionality? Immediately? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our holistic front-end bloatware and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We realize that if you empower intuitively then you may also visualize cyber-robustly. The solutions factor is front-end. We will orchestrate the term "strategic". Our feature set is unparalleled, but our virally-distributed interactive out-of-the-box ultra-efficient sticky R&D metrics and simple use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does the jargon-based term "functionalities" really mean? It seems improbable, but it's true! The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained.