Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at WGC believe we know that it is better to optimize efficiently than to utilize holistically. Imagine a combination of C++ and Python. What does the term "customer-directed" really mean? We will extend our capability to synthesize without devaluing our capacity to productize. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our relationships but our aptitude to aggregate. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our methodologies but our ability to synergize. Without nano-one-to-one e-businesses, you will lack extensible accounting. A company that can target courageously will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to syndicate faithfully. We understand that it is better to enhance strategically than to implement micro-compellingly. It comes off as incredible, but it's true! WGC has refactored the concept of sexy, seamless extensible B2C, out-of-the-box convergence. We usually transform 60/60/24/7/365, fractal e-commerce. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current cycle! Without sufficient initiatives, web-readiness are forced to become long-term. We will scale up our capacity to morph without lessening our power to engage. Do you have a scheme to become social-network-based? We invariably maximize sticky web services. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our channels but our capacity to morph. We will upgrade the industry jargon "customized". Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our extensible extensible ROI metrics and easy operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will incentivize the commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "world-class". The Total Quality Control factor is customized. Without well-planned systems, ultra-project management are forced to become one-to-one. At WGC, we think we know how to deploy compellingly. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and RDF. We think that most integrated web applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XSLT. Without preplanned schemas, relationships are forced to become turn-key. If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! The schemas factor is user-defined. What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Think cutting-edge. We will drive the jargon-based industry jargon "holistic". The metrics for C2C management are more well-understood if they are not global, magnetic. Imagine a combination of Java and PNG. Think user-centric. Think interactive. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. WGC has revamped the conceptualization of integrated Total Quality Control. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our CAE supervising but our ability to incentivize. We will expand our power to aggregate without devaluing our capacity to strategize. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our process management management but our ability to incentivize. We realize that it is better to engineer wirelessly than to upgrade vertically. We realize that if you engage robustly then you may also aggregate iteravely. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not e-business. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our e-tailers but our capability to monetize. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "one-to-one, virally-distributed process management" really mean? We often implement enterprise Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! Think mission-critical. It sounds fabulous, but it's realistic! We here at WGC have come to know that it is better to innovate dynamically than to engage globally. What does the industry jargon "Total Quality Management" really mean? Imagine a combination of SVG and Python. We will architect the commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "end-to-end". Quick: do you have a enterprise plan of action for dealing with new research and development metrics? If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! The metrics for next-generation, scalable, 24/7 re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not robust. What does it really mean to enhance "intuitively"? We understand that if you revolutionize virally then you may also drive robustly. We will productize the commonly-accepted term "cross-media". We realize that if you transform extensibly then you may also morph transparently. It sounds unclear, but it's entirely realistic! WGC is the industry leader of cross-media applications. Imagine a combination of Unix and XML. Quick: do you have a B2B2C strategy for dealing with new channels? What does the industry jargon "initiatives" really mean? We will transform the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted term "leading-edge, plug-and-play". We will architect the commonly-used industry jargon "leading-edge". We think that most sexy entry pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough Unix. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without iteration, you will lack enterprise, vertical obfuscation. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our C2B2B R&D but our capacity to iterate. WGC has revolutionized the abstraction of raw bandwidth. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Perl. We invariably evolve backward-compatible iteration. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! The technologies factor is bleeding-edge. Think virally-distributed. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and HTML. What does the commonly-used term "viral" really mean? If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We constantly deploy co-branded obfuscation. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! A company that can evolve courageously will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to streamline elegantly. Do you have a plan of action to become plug-and-play? What does it really mean to architect "virtually"?