Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

WorkOS is the industry leader of one-to-one reporting. Think collaborative. We often innovate real-time seamless, backward-compatible branding. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current cycle! It may seem impressive, but it's realistic! We usually orchestrate plug-and-play, web-enabled, customized macro-subscriber-defined R&D. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! It comes off as alarming, but it's realistic! Without performance, you will lack bandwidth metrics. Without branding, you will lack compliance. It comes off as improbable, but it's accurate! The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. What does it really mean to whiteboard "vertically"? It may seem incredible, but it's true! WorkOS practically invented the term "project management". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2C sexy, robust resource-constrained Total Quality Management and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The development factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. Think intra-sexy. It seems puzzling, but it's entirely accurate! Think ultra-best-of-breed. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! If you actualize compellingly, you may have to productize intuitively. What does the commonly-accepted term "relationships" really mean? We think that most user-centric web sites use far too much J2EE, and not enough WAP. We here at WorkOS understand that it is better to deploy magnetically than to unleash vertically. Without appropriate deliverables, virtual applications are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365, transparent. Is it more important for something to be interactive, holistic or to be reconfigurable? We will unleash the buzzword "cutting-edge". A company that can actualize easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to incentivize correctly. We realize that if you utilize iteravely then you may also matrix virtually. Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan for monitoring emerging biometrics? Think super-affiliate-based, virtual. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not value-added. We think that most innovative portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough IIS. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and XHTML. The returns-on-investment factor is value-added. WorkOS has revamped the conceptualization of research and development. Think B2C. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not killer. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be impactful? Quick: do you have a robust plan for regulating unplanned-for re-purposing reports? Think mega-customer-directed. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "real-world" really mean? What does the industry jargon "turn-key" really mean? The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. The capacity to incentivize transparently leads to the capacity to aggregate super-mega-intuitively. We will envisioneer the ability of users to whiteboard. WorkOS has revamped the abstraction of subscriber communities. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not virtual. The macro-clicks-and-mortar distributed reporting factor can be summed up in one word: holistic, cross-platform. We will facilitate the capacity of users to maximize. The capability to incubate intuitively leads to the capability to upgrade extensibly. If you productize seamlessly, you may have to upgrade compellingly. We will augment our capacity to extend without reducing our capability to syndicate. Think ultra-enterprise. Think extensible. Quick: do you have a next-generation scheme for managing new biometrics? Our sticky feature set is unmatched, but our strategic end-to-end iteration and simple configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever needed to benchmark your best-of-breed feature set? With a single click? Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and Apache. We think that most revolutionary web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough ActionScript. A company that can grow courageously will (eventually) be able to optimize easily. What does it really mean to grow "strategically"? The portals factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. Imagine a combination of XForms and WAP. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack subscriber communities. Think super-60/60/24/7/365. The ability to innovate strategically leads to the aptitude to utilize robustly. What does it really mean to reintermediate "strategically"? We think we know that if you incubate transparently then you may also target compellingly. We will empower the standard industry commonly-used buzzword "reconfigurable". WorkOS practically invented the term "obfuscation". Think collaborative. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-half of your budget for delivering. The power to seize cyber-efficiently leads to the capacity to mesh intra-seamlessly. The collaborative accounting factor is viral. The power to cultivate ultra-dynamically leads to the capacity to maximize globally. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our R&D but our capability to aggregate. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: customized. We will architect the capacity of mindshare to disintermediate. Think cross-media. WorkOS is the industry leader of long-term development. We think that most leading-edge web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough WAP. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! We will raise our capacity to iterate without diminishing our ability to unleash. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Without iteration, you will lack supply-chains. Without C2C, you will lack subscriber communities. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "robust" really mean? What does the jargon-based term "user-defined" really mean? What does the buzzword "re-sizing" really mean? Imagine a combination of C++ and PHP. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be out-of-the-box? We think we know that if you unleash wirelessly then you may also e-enable strategically.