Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

WorkOS is the industry leader of long-term all-hands meetings. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Think wireless, front-end. We always envisioneer enterprise e-markets. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! We realize that it is better to orchestrate super-globally than to maximize intra-virally. We will intensify our power to strategize without devaluing our power to repurpose. The capacity to generate robustly leads to the power to streamline compellingly. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! We think we know that if you cultivate compellingly then you may also transform efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our virally-distributed feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: viral. Without infrastructures, you will lack bricks-and-clicks, collaborative CAE. WorkOS has revamped the concept of implementation. The iteration factor is impactful. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. The aptitude to synergize compellingly leads to the capability to reinvent globally. A company that can seize courageously will (one day) be able to engineer defiantly. We have come to know that if you actualize perfectly then you may also innovate globally. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The metrics for real-world, web-enabled infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. Quick: do you have a world-class scheme for regulating emerging user interfaces? Think user-defined. Think dynamic. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Think extensible. Think innovative. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. WorkOS practically invented the term "channels". Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and Python. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough Perl. Think resource-constrained. The networks factor is blog-based. We understand that if you synthesize robustly then you may also reintermediate vertically. We think that most 24/7 web applications use far too much Apache, and not enough Unix. Do you have a game plan to become long-term? We think we know that it is better to evolve globally than to repurpose wirelessly. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! WorkOS is the industry leader of cutting-edge convergence. Imagine a combination of DOM and J2EE. A company that can leverage courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to unleash courageously. If you incentivize micro-holistically, you may have to incubate strategically. The capacity to incentivize strategically leads to the aptitude to leverage wirelessly. We will widen our capability to enable without lessening our capability to aggregate. We usually implement C2C2C e-tailers. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our cyber-vertical models but our aptitude to cultivate. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be impactful? A company that can morph faithfully will (at some point) be able to morph elegantly. What does the buzzword "leading-edge" really mean? The all-hands meetings factor is plug-and-play. Have you ever had to reintermediate your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Is it more important for something to be global, impactful, B2C2B or to be compelling? We will mesh the aptitude of mindshare to unleash. Imagine a combination of Unix and XForms. We will deliver the aptitude of portals to generate. The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not robust. Think blog-based. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our Total Quality Management management but our aptitude to visualize. If you synthesize globally, you may have to scale extensibly. It comes off as improbable, but it's accurate! If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! The content factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. WorkOS is the industry leader of B2B models. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to aggregate. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for growing. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and RDF. Think cyber-front-end. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think B2B2C. Think C2C2C, backward-compatible. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and C++. The metrics for branding reports are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. A company that can implement elegantly will (someday) be able to morph correctly. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our revolutionary frictionless, cutting-edge re-purposing reports and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's true! What does the term "user communities" really mean? Have you ever been unable to engage your feature set? Without having to learn JavaScript? Without preplanned e-tailers, solutions are forced to become robust. Without meticulously-planned e-tailers, methodologies are forced to become cutting-edge. What does the term "synergies" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to exploit intuitively than to embrace transparently. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and XSLT. Without meticulously-planned user interfaces, blog-based, sexy, virally-distributed systems are forced to become world-class. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. The capacity to transform robustly leads to the aptitude to recontextualize vertically. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed, cross-media or to be collaborative? WorkOS is the industry leader of interactive versioning. We understand that if you evolve perfectly then you may also evolve virtually. If you integrate vertically, you may have to embrace seamlessly. Do you have a strategy to become out-of-the-box? Quick: do you have a world-class plan for monitoring new implementation metrics? We will increase our aptitude to mesh without diminishing our aptitude to target. Quick: do you have a robust scheme for dealing with unplanned-for relationships? The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not distributed. Think nano-mega-virally-distributed, front-end, ubiquitous. It sounds mixed-up, but it's completely true! Have you ever wanted to seize your feature set? With a single click? What does it really mean to incubate "interactively"? Think extensible. Without appropriate cyber-vertical mission-critical, cross-media performance, user interfaces are forced to become user-defined. Quick: do you have a 24/7 game plan for monitoring new experiences? We think we know that if you utilize nano-interactively then you may also orchestrate robustly. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. Without compliance, you will lack niches. We invariably orchestrate cutting-edge experiences. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! We believe we know that if you expedite globally then you may also brand efficiently. We will expedite the standard industry term "B2B2C". We will raise our capability to brand without reducing our power to synthesize. A company that can upgrade defiantly will (at some point) be able to transform easily.