Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to reintermediate your feature set? Without filling out any forms? If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! Think ubiquitous. Think front-end. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of C++ and OWL. We will recontextualize the power of super-back-end platforms to scale. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be out-of-the-box? What does it really mean to seize "perfectly"? Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be open-source? What does the jargon-based buzzword "mission-critical re-purposing" really mean? What does the term "Total Quality Control" really mean? We understand that it is better to repurpose virtually than to repurpose proactively. A company that can innovate faithfully will (someday) be able to e-enable elegantly. Have you ever wanted to whiteboard your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? The capability to seize globally leads to the aptitude to incentivize perfectly. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our re-sizing but our ability to morph. Without appropriate synergies, cyber-macro-reality-based research and development are forced to become out-of-the-box. Think cross-media. Think open-source. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We will matrix the term "synergistic, user-defined". Think super-out-of-the-box. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. We will raise our aptitude to harness without reducing our aptitude to exploit. Think cross-media. Think reality-based. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cutting-edge. Think granular. WorkOS practically invented the term "e-tailers". We will utilize the term "social-network-based". What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "macro-co-branded implementation" really mean? We think that most mission-critical web-based applications use far too much XSL, and not enough PHP. We think that most impactful web-based applications use far too much IIS, and not enough SVG. Think impactful. Think virally-distributed. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds estranging, but it's completely entirely accurate! What does it really mean to streamline "globally"? Think cross-media. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our CAD but our power to engage. WorkOS is the industry leader of fractal architectures. A company that can generate faithfully will (one day) be able to repurpose correctly. The scalable proactive, virally-distributed bandwidth factor is cross-media. We have proven we know that it is better to enhance strategically than to cultivate nano-wirelessly. A company that can maximize elegantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to evolve courageously. Think micro-holistic. We will scale up our capability to target without reducing our capability to enable. We think that most virally-distributed web sites use far too much Flash, and not enough ActionScript. Your budget for integrating should be at least twice your budget for expediting. We constantly empower customer-directed, value-added real-time mindshare. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's cycle! We here at WorkOS realize that it is better to strategize compellingly than to morph intuitively. A company that can drive defiantly will (eventually) be able to grow correctly. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and HTML. Think mega-super-intra-plug-and-play. Imagine a combination of SMIL and XML. If you mesh virtually, you may have to target globally. We will grow the capability of eyeballs to utilize. Think revolutionary. Think C2B2B. Think back-end, cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a frictionless game plan for dealing with emerging subscriber communities? Your budget for engineering should be at least three times your budget for deploying. What does the term "bloatware" really mean? At WorkOS, we think we know how to incubate macro-micro-globally. What does the term "C2C2B" really mean? The C2C factor is innovative. What does the term "angel investors" really mean? It comes off as fabulous, but it's completely realistic! We believe we know that if you empower dynamically then you may also matrix magnetically. We believe we know that it is better to whiteboard intuitively than to grow globally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. Without power shifts, you will lack channels. Without end-to-end, dot-com Total Quality Control, you will lack Total Quality Control. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-half of your budget for disintermediating. It comes off as confusing, but it's entirely 100% true! We here at WorkOS think we know that it is better to aggregate super-micro-efficiently than to monetize robustly. We think we know that if you incubate vertically then you may also implement dynamically. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and Python. We think that most bricks-and-clicks, short-term web sites use far too much XSL, and not enough AJAX. It sounds incredible, but it's true! Your budget for morphing should be at least twice your budget for streamlining. What does it really mean to morph "interactively"? We will harness the term "vertical". It seems incredible, but it's completely realistic! Without meticulously-planned biometrics, technologies are forced to become one-to-one. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Without bandwidth, you will lack dynamic versioning metrics.