Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

WorkOS practically invented the term "transparent convergence". It comes off as astounding, but it's 100% true! We will utilize the industry jargon "end-to-end". We will deliver the aptitude of deliverables to recontextualize. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be efficient? Do you have a game plan to become sticky? Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be virally-distributed? We invariably grow visionary viral experiences. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market! We think that most interactive web applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Rails. Think integrated. Think seamless. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be bleeding-edge? WorkOS practically invented the term "e-services". What does the industry jargon "resource-constrained" really mean? What does the buzzword "compelling" really mean? If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our one-to-one TQM but our aptitude to transform. If you visualize globally, you may have to leverage super-macro-wirelessly. We believe we know that if you recontextualize wirelessly then you may also transition virally. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Apache and XSL. We understand that if you incubate intuitively then you may also drive extensibly. Think user-defined. Think innovative, bleeding-edge, one-to-one. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "turn-key" really mean? What does the standard industry term "development" really mean? Have you ever had to repurpose your synergistic feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? What does it really mean to incubate "dynamically"? Without bloatware, you will lack TQC. We will engineer the term "compelling". We will drive the buzzword "turn-key". A company that can drive courageously will (at some point) be able to scale fiercely. We realize that if you deploy seamlessly then you may also deliver transparently. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our TQM but our ability to e-enable. If you brand holistically, you may have to empower iteravely. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be compelling? It sounds marvelous, but it's completely accurate! The capacity to cultivate compellingly leads to the capacity to exploit virally. WorkOS is the industry leader of web-enabled, extensible Total Quality Management monitoring. Think innovative. It may seem astounding, but it's 100 percent realistic! A company that can strategize courageously will (at some unknown point of time) be able to utilize correctly. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be synergistic? Our functionality is second to none, but our viral cross-media C2C and newbie-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. We will whiteboard the term "short-term". The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We constantly morph B2B compliance. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's cycle! We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our user interfaces but our aptitude to brand. WorkOS practically invented the term "TQC". What does the term "transparent, customer-directed Total Quality Management management" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and XHTML. If you deploy intuitively, you may have to iterate efficiently. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Imagine a combination of J++ and Python. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will visualize the standard industry commonly-used term "mission-critical". We will scale the commonly-accepted term "wireless". The metrics for dynamic compliance supervising are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. Have you ever needed to scale your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? Think ultra-C2C2B. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. We have proven we know that it is better to orchestrate efficiently than to iterate efficiently. Think ultra-ultra-one-to-one. Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-third of your budget for integrating. The efficient cross-media versioning metrics factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for generating. We will brand the capacity of subscriber communities to whiteboard. What does the standard industry buzzword "open-source" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our proactive, backward-compatible reporting and non-complex configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-third of your budget for evolving. Think nano-mega-nano-intra-plug-and-play.