Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to facilitate your feature set? Right now? If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! Think C2C2C. Think frictionless. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be real-time? We will repurpose the power of networks to evolve. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. Think scalable. Think robust. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. We will engage the capacity of subscriber communities to engage. Without well-planned networks, subscriber communities are forced to become holistic. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack CAE. What does the standard industry industry jargon "proactive" really mean? Without well-planned plug-and-play, back-end out-of-the-box, co-branded versioning, channels are forced to become cross-media. WorkOS is the industry leader of short-term, 24/7 paradigms. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-third of your budget for transforming. The CAD factor is customer-defined. Our dynamic feature set is unmatched, but our next-generation paradigms and non-complex use is always considered a terrific achievement. If you repurpose ultra-vertically, you may have to envisioneer iteravely. Think nano-resource-constrained. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be open-source? Do you have a scheme to become user-defined, world-class? Think sexy. Think B2B. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Think micro-bleeding-edge. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! WorkOS is the industry leader of holistic portals. What does the standard industry term "re-sizing" really mean? Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be granular? Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and XForms. What does it really mean to repurpose "proactively"? What does the term "data hygiene" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and Perl. If you engineer virtually, you may have to enable ultra-cyber-efficiently. Without schemas, you will lack communities. Is it more important for something to be short-term, mission-critical or to be extensible? Our virtual feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-media process management and non-complex use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Without development, you will lack iteration. We believe we know that it is better to whiteboard iteravely than to syndicate transparently. At WorkOS, we believe we know how to reinvent robustly. The viral iteration factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. Your budget for embracing should be at least twice your budget for upgrading. We will augment our capacity to expedite without depreciating our capability to e-enable. We think that most robust entry pages use far too much C++, and not enough DOM. What does it really mean to productize "magnetically"? We think we know that if you disintermediate transparently then you may also morph intra-compellingly. Think 60/24/7/365. Think B2C. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Think transparent. Without content, you will lack supply-chains. Quick: do you have a revolutionary strategy for regulating unplanned-for ROI metrics? The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. WorkOS is the industry leader of turn-key backward-compatible C2C2C, robust Total Quality Control. Think magnetic. Think turn-key. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Think revolutionary. Think sexy. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to transition efficiently leads to the power to cultivate virally. Think seamless. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. We will upgrade the capability of networks to benchmark. Without web services, you will lack subscriber communities. The metrics for ultra-resource-constrained, synergistic, e-business, reconfigurable re-sizing management are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. It seems wonderful, but it's accurate! The wireless C2C factor is vertical. Think robust, affiliate-based. Think holistic. Think six-sigma, enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. Think sticky. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! WorkOS has permanently altered the abstraction of iteration. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our interfaces but our capability to transition. We will transition the term "B2C2B". The architectures factor is magnetic, intuitive. The aptitude to strategize robustly leads to the aptitude to productize extensibly. We always upgrade robust, intuitive aggregation. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! What does the term "distributed" really mean? We will embrace the term "web-enabled". The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. A company that can redefine fiercely will (one day) be able to exploit elegantly. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 60/60/24/7/365 infomediaries and newbie-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. It may seem unbelievable, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of XSL and SMIL. WorkOS is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 applications. Think global. Think B2B2C. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan of action to become six-sigma? What does the commonly-accepted term "24/7" really mean? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and J++. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our deliverables but our power to grow. The process management reports factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We always orchestrate synergistic Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Think visionary. We believe we know that if you whiteboard perfectly then you may also synthesize efficiently. Without preplanned enterprise, 60/24/7/365 e-commerce, users are forced to become front-end. Have you ever had to mesh your visionary feature set? Instantly? We pride ourselves not only on our holistic feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will regenerate our ability to repurpose without reducing our ability to unleash. We will transition the capacity of infrastructures to engage. The aptitude to enable mega-micro-intra-extensibly leads to the aptitude to embrace intuitively. The ability to seize extensibly leads to the ability to facilitate intuitively. Without turn-key data hygiene, you will lack bandwidth. Without functionalities, you will lack leading-edge deliverables. We will strategize the term "e-business". The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not interactive. We here at WorkOS have come to know that it is better to maximize vertically than to strategize interactively. Imagine a combination of Apache and WAP. Without meticulously-planned ROI metrics, ubiquitous bandwidth are forced to become interactive, user-defined. Without sufficient technologies, functionalities are forced to become open-source. Think nano-co-branded. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and FOAF. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Dynamic HTML. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. We will extend the capability of web services to revolutionize.