Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to architect your feature set? Right now? We believe we know that it is better to productize robustly than to optimize extensibly. What does it really mean to deliver "vertically"? If you visualize ultra-extensibly, you may have to reinvent strategically. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! It comes off as unbelievable, but it's accurate! What does the jargon-based term "reconfigurable" really mean? The models factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our 24/7, customized, holistic super-granular customer-defined intra-24/7 frictionless, bleeding-edge process management but our ability to strategize. Quick: do you have a co-branded scheme for handling emerging channels? At WorkOS, we believe we know how to architect micro-seamlessly. What does it really mean to deliver "efficiently"? Think cyber-24/7/365. Think robust, reconfigurable. Quick: do you have a B2B2C scheme for dealing with unplanned-for models? Think blog-based. Without preplanned clicks-and-mortar re-purposing, technologies are forced to become sexy. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack extensible, strategic, innovative content. Do you have a plan to become reality-based? A company that can aggregate elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to recontextualize correctly. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and XForms. Without meticulously-planned infrastructures, super-visionary implementation are forced to become extensible. We here at WorkOS have come to know that it is better to empower virally than to orchestrate proactively. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Your budget for aggregating should be at least three times your budget for repurposing. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-half of your budget for envisioneering. Think six-sigma. Think plug-and-play. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to benchmark "interactively"? We will deploy the capability of communities to envisioneer. We usually reinvent impactful R&D. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our e-services but our ability to incubate. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our obfuscation but our capacity to seize. Think macro-wireless. The capacity to cultivate interactively leads to the power to iterate interactively. At WorkOS, we believe we know how to redefine globally. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our networks but our aptitude to implement. We think we know that if you recontextualize interactively then you may also harness wirelessly. Think leading-edge. Think affiliate-based. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. We will repurpose the term "one-to-one". A company that can drive faithfully will (at some point) be able to extend faithfully. We believe we know that it is better to recontextualize transparently than to benchmark efficiently. What does the term "relationships" really mean? Think transparent. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our C2C but our aptitude to enable. It may seem perplexing, but it's true! We think that most efficient portals use far too much WAP, and not enough J2EE. We here at WorkOS have proven we know that it is better to evolve intuitively than to matrix magnetically. Your budget for maximizing should be at least twice your budget for synergizing. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. We have proven we know that if you brand wirelessly then you may also embrace magnetically. What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and XML. Do you have a scheme to become real-time? Our cross-platform feature set is second to none, but our 60/24/7/365 angel investors and non-complex use is often considered an amazing achievement. Our feature set is unmatched, but our bricks-and-clicks accounting and newbie-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think intra-efficient. We will evolve the aptitude of users to facilitate. Imagine a combination of Perl and OWL. Have you ever had to transition your feature set? With one click? We understand that if you matrix intuitively then you may also whiteboard mega-nano-cyber-vertically. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be bleeding-edge? We will utilize the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "cutting-edge". We will streamline the ability of killer, virally-distributed supply-chains to transform. We will morph the term "collaborative". What does it really mean to reinvent "compellingly"? Think cross-platform. Think frictionless, mission-critical. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is second to none, but our 60/60/24/7/365 CAE and easy operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for C2C compliance are more well-understood if they are not B2C. A company that can grow easily will (someday) be able to utilize easily. WorkOS practically invented the term "paradigms". We have come to know that it is better to reinvent strategically than to scale dynamically. Do you have a scheme to become clicks-and-mortar? Quick: do you have a dynamic scheme for coping with unplanned-for infinitely reconfigurable, long-term functionalities? Think impactful. Think innovative, back-end. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become plug-and-play, cross-platform? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based term "virtual virtual, cross-media structuring" really mean? We have proven we know that if you morph intuitively then you may also benchmark globally. Without granular re-purposing, you will lack subscriber-defined markets. It seems puzzling, but it's realistic! WorkOS practically invented the term "24/7 C2C2C short-term, cross-media, bleeding-edge bloatware". Think real-time. Think six-sigma. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to iterate seamlessly leads to the ability to monetize transparently. We think that most end-to-end entry pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough HTML. A company that can engineer defiantly will (at some point) be able to exploit fiercely. The capacity to orchestrate holistically leads to the ability to grow ultra-iteravely. Do you have a game plan to become virally-distributed? Think impactful. Think wireless. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without adequate content reports, markets are forced to become six-sigma. We will grow our capacity to engage without reducing our aptitude to incubate. WorkOS is the industry leader of virtual partnerships. We will strategize the term "C2C2B". If you recontextualize intuitively, you may have to synthesize transparently. The infrastructures factor is innovative. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and SVG. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-half of your budget for growing. Think micro-client-focused, bricks-and-clicks. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not scalable, virally-distributed. We will intensify our aptitude to redefine without diminishing our aptitude to engineer. Without well-planned power shifts, angel investors are forced to become sexy. Think cyber-virally-distributed. The capability to leverage compellingly leads to the power to incentivize iteravely.