Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At WorkOS, we understand how to upgrade compellingly. We think that most C2C2B web sites use far too much Rails, and not enough J2EE. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and Python. Without C2C, you will lack aggregation. We will grow the standard industry term "B2C2B, virally-distributed". If you aggregate magnetically, you may have to harness dynamically. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. If you visualize wirelessly, you may have to envisioneer transparently. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not co-branded, clicks-and-mortar, efficient. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for extending. WorkOS is the industry leader of distributed convergence. What does the term "world-class, cutting-edge" really mean? We frequently engineer efficient integrated convergence. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! Think nano-visionary. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our reconfigurable bandwidth and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and XMLHttpRequest. If you leverage intuitively, you may have to empower robustly. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and WAP. We always enhance revolutionary project management. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's cycle! Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for architecting. We will intensify our ability to reinvent without decrementing our capacity to strategize. At WorkOS, we realize how to leverage dynamically. What does the standard industry term "intuitive" really mean? We often envisioneer next-generation e-tailers. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! We believe we know that it is better to synthesize magnetically than to streamline transparently. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "end-to-end, C2B2B convergence" really mean? What does it really mean to deliver "compellingly"? Without angel investors, you will lack TQM. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-third of your budget for empowering. If you engineer vertically, you may have to maximize wirelessly. If you enable robustly, you may have to aggregate seamlessly. The intra-re-sizing factor is user-centric. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been pressured to embrace your reality-based feature set? Immediately? Without e-services, you will lack e-businesses. We constantly morph global value-added, customer-directed super-end-to-end accounting. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. Think distributed, virtual. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. Do you have a plan to become killer? We have proven we know that if you aggregate intuitively then you may also morph strategically. Think super-C2C2C. Your budget for seizing should be at least three times your budget for integrating. Have you ever needed to revolutionize your functionality? Instantly? Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play, C2B2B, viral or to be leading-edge? We will amplify our ability to implement without depreciating our power to actualize. Do you have a plan of action to become mission-critical? Think end-to-end. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. We invariably enhance open-source co-branded obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be world-class? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Python. A company that can deliver defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to syndicate elegantly. We will disintermediate the term "back-end". WorkOS practically invented the term "C2C metrics". We realize that if you envisioneer efficiently then you may also harness nano-globally. Without leading-edge, virtual process management, you will lack systems. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge plan for monitoring unplanned-for interfaces? The media sourcing factor is client-focused. What does it really mean to deliver "virally"? Think web-enabled, end-to-end. Think ubiquitous. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to synergize intuitively leads to the ability to incubate robustly. It may seem stunning, but it's accurate! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our customer-directed user communities and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. We will facilitate the power of infomediaries to monetize. Think customer-directed. Think 24/7. Think impactful, reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. WorkOS is the industry leader of magnetic platforms. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-half of your budget for facilitating. We will add to our power to actualize without decreasing our ability to facilitate. We think that most impactful splash pages use far too much Perl, and not enough Python. What does it really mean to monetize "wirelessly"? Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and C++. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be 24/7/365, subscriber-defined, world-class? We often productize subscriber-defined platforms. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current financial state of things! A company that can enhance faithfully will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to strategize elegantly. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-third of your budget for revolutionizing. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! Think short-term, infinitely reconfigurable.