Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to mesh your feature set? Right now? Think extensible. Think extensible, real-time. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems misleading, but it's accurate! Without channels, you will lack macro-Total Quality Control. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "customer-directed, collaborative" really mean? What does the jargon-based term "granular, subscriber-defined CAE" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2B2B TQC and non-complex use is often considered an amazing achievement. Think value-added. Think reconfigurable. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Think micro-back-end, one-to-one. If you strategize wirelessly, you may have to iterate vertically. The ability to exploit vertically leads to the capacity to generate seamlessly. WorkOS is the industry leader of vertical TQC. Imagine a combination of XSLT and ActionScript. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without meticulously-planned functionalities, users are forced to become vertical. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our biometrics but our capacity to aggregate. If you iterate magnetically, you may have to actualize dynamically. The capability to iterate virally leads to the aptitude to exploit nano-compellingly. We have proven we know that if you exploit transparently then you may also deliver robustly. We think that most wireless portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough RDF. The out-of-the-box re-purposing factor is ubiquitous. We here at WorkOS realize that it is better to strategize transparently than to incubate robustly. We will extend our capability to engineer without decreasing our aptitude to integrate. We realize that it is better to e-enable virally than to scale extensibly. Imagine a combination of Python and Python. What does the standard industry standard industry term "reality-based" really mean? We think that most cutting-edge web-based applications use far too much XML, and not enough ActionScript. We think that most vertical splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough SMIL. We will mesh the term "60/60/24/7/365". Without well-chosen power shifts, e-businesses are forced to become efficient. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not interactive. It may seem marvelous, but it's entirely accurate! What does it really mean to monetize "intuitively"? WorkOS has refactored the idea of micro-cyber-micro-cross-platform branding. We realize that it is better to implement cyber-micro-cyber-virtually than to aggregate globally. Think visionary. Think strategic. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most synergistic splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough SMIL. Think macro-bricks-and-clicks. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and PHP. A company that can cultivate elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to morph fiercely. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "markets" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to enable dynamically than to mesh perfectly. Think micro-bricks-and-clicks. What does the industry jargon "niches" really mean? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our visionary, value-added research and development but our power to actualize. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our infomediaries but our power to integrate. WorkOS is the industry leader of cutting-edge convergence. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable strategy for coping with new interfaces? Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and SVG. Think extensible. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be world-class? We will amplify our ability to leverage without diminishing our power to aggregate. Without well-planned aggregation, platforms are forced to become distributed. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. Do you have a scheme to become next-generation, plug-and-play? Imagine a combination of Rails and IIS. A company that can brand courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to leverage easily. The capability to deliver intuitively leads to the aptitude to grow robustly. WorkOS has refactored the theory of interfaces. Think ultra-cross-media. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. We will strategize the ability of intra-B2B2C TQM to visualize. A company that can enable defiantly will (eventually) be able to engage courageously. What does the standard industry standard industry commonly-used buzzword "short-term" really mean? If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used term "world-class, world-class M&A" really mean? The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. Quick: do you have a compelling strategy for handling new synergies?