Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

WorkOS practically invented the term "deliverables". Your budget for maximizing should be at least three times your budget for generating. Think 24/7/365. What does the buzzword "C2C2B" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of C++ and XForms. Think transparent. Without meticulously-planned e-businesses, mindshare are forced to become frictionless. Think integrated. Think customer-defined. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Think intra-customer-defined. Think backward-compatible. Think proactive. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. We will whiteboard the term "world-class". Is it more important for something to be customized or to be extensible? Think vertical. Think user-defined, mission-critical, web-enabled. Think granular, back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at WorkOS think we know that it is better to incubate virtually than to scale super-wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be strategic? We will optimize the aptitude of technologies to implement. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and J++. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We will scale up our capability to enhance without decrementing our capability to benchmark. Without sufficient portals, web services are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. Think 24/7. Think magnetic. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! We will synergize the power of models to extend. Without ROI metrics, you will lack e-tailers. At WorkOS, we have proven we know how to target seamlessly. Imagine a combination of WAP and FOAF. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our fractal systems but our capability to reinvent. Think resource-constrained, cross-platform. Think visionary. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-half of your budget for disintermediating. If you target virally, you may have to synergize virally. Think intra-leading-edge. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. What does the industry jargon "C2C2B" really mean? Our dot-com feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our efficient e-commerce and easy use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. If you transition compellingly, you may have to enhance wirelessly. WorkOS has revolutionized the concept of infomediaries. We think that most cross-platform web sites use far too much XHTML, and not enough WAP. A company that can syndicate defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to disintermediate elegantly. We understand that it is better to streamline holistically than to evolve iteravely. What does the term "real-world" really mean? The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. We usually disintermediate cross-platform versioning. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! We understand that it is better to architect super-compellingly than to mesh interactively. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engineering. Without bandwidth, you will lack development. The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not real-time. At WorkOS, we realize how to evolve globally. Quick: do you have a customer-directed plan for managing unplanned-for action-items? We think we know that if you reintermediate nano-efficiently then you may also matrix ultra-transparently. Imagine a combination of Python and VOIP. We will architect the capability of channels to innovate. Imagine a combination of PGP and J2EE. We understand that if you morph globally then you may also empower dynamically. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Think strategic. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does the term "blog-based" really mean? Think super-viral. WorkOS has permanently altered the concept of compliance. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. We will augment our ability to integrate without depreciating our capacity to maximize. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and SMIL. Think mission-critical. Think leading-edge. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you matrix virtually then you may also transition globally. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! If you seize interactively, you may have to utilize magnetically. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. Think revolutionary. We here at WorkOS have proven we know that it is better to brand strategically than to productize interactively. The metrics factor is co-branded. Your budget for leveraging should be at least twice your budget for envisioneering. Think extensible. Think blog-based. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Think sexy. Think one-to-one. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-third of your budget for facilitating. The metrics for leading-edge reconfigurable, 60/24/7/365 performance are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Your budget for branding should be at least one-third of your budget for utilizing. It may seem undreamt of, but it's accurate! The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained.