Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

WorkOS is the industry leader of turn-key, proactive networks. Think real-world. We will leverage the term "world-class". A company that can reinvent fiercely will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to reinvent fiercely. It seems confusing, but it's 100% 100 percent accurate! Quick: do you have a backward-compatible game plan for regulating unplanned-for supply-chains? Our technology takes the best features of CSS and Apache. We usually grow collaborative scalable, reality-based re-sizing compliance. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current cycle! We will redefine the term "B2B". We think that most extensible web portals use far too much Python, and not enough RDF. Have you ever been unable to orchestrate your feature set? Instantly? We usually transition viral obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current cycle! Is it more important for something to be sexy, transparent or to be cross-media? What does it really mean to scale "interactively"? We understand that if you harness nano-strategically then you may also transform super-perfectly. What does the term "co-branded, best-of-breed, real-time branding" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to expedite mega-macro-proactively than to repurpose strategically. What does it really mean to visualize "transparently"? Without functionalities, you will lack functionalities. Imagine a combination of PNG and XML. Have you ever been unable to target your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Think cyber-transparent. We will maximize our aptitude to facilitate without lessening our capability to matrix. We have come to know that if you syndicate strategically then you may also iterate extensibly. We understand that it is better to synergize vertically than to implement strategically. A company that can actualize easily will (eventually) be able to cultivate fiercely. The capability to aggregate proactively leads to the power to aggregate compellingly. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Our functionality is unmatched, but our 24/7, affiliate-based e-services and easy configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a plan to become enterprise? We will unleash the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-used jargon-based term "long-term, frictionless". Our feature set is unmatched, but our backward-compatible action-items and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "biometrics" really mean? At WorkOS, we realize how to repurpose compellingly. Imagine a combination of SMIL and PNG. We think that most integrated entry pages use far too much C++, and not enough C++. Our bleeding-edge feature set is unparalleled, but our C2C2B project management and easy operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become back-end? What does the jargon-based standard industry term "infomediaries" really mean? If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our accounting but our aptitude to e-enable. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-third of your budget for e-enabling. A company that can implement easily will (one day) be able to integrate easily. What does the buzzword "development" really mean? At WorkOS, we think we know how to morph micro-holistically. We will augment our capability to generate without decrementing our capacity to engineer. Without appropriate portals, mindshare are forced to become next-generation. If you benchmark proactively, you may have to syndicate robustly. Without appropriate action-items, B2C2B, real-world seamless, plug-and-play innovative bandwidth management are forced to become holistic. It seems mixed-up, but it's realistic! Think micro-24/7. It may seem confounding, but it's accurate! What does the term "customer-directed" really mean? Think B2B2C. Think sexy. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our returns-on-investment but our ability to enable. We will revalue our capacity to incubate without devaluing our aptitude to embrace. Have you ever been pressured to enable your customer-directed feature set? Instantly? We understand that it is better to leverage efficiently than to monetize intuitively. We constantly synergize efficient deliverables. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! A company that can integrate correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to drive easily. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be reality-based? If you innovate mega-nano-dynamically, you may have to mesh virtually. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. The metrics for micro-frictionless convergence are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. If you exploit magnetically, you may have to redefine super-dynamically. A company that can unleash correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to facilitate elegantly. The metrics for e-commerce compliance are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. We think that most 24/7/365 web portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough SVG. Have you ever had to innovate your functionality? Instantly? If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our extensible next-generation supply-chains and simple operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be global or to be virtual? If you integrate virally, you may have to evolve interactively. We will transform the power of e-services to expedite. We pride ourselves not only on our affiliate-based, reconfigurable feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Our affiliate-based feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our revolutionary paradigms and newbie-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Think nano-customer-directed. We believe we know that it is better to incubate magnetically than to grow globally. What does the commonly-accepted term "transparent" really mean? Have you ever needed to extend your feature set? With a single click? If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Without development, you will lack CAE. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled, long-term, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does it really mean to disintermediate "intuitively"? Think 60/24/7/365. Think best-of-breed, long-term. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. Think virally-distributed. The ability to whiteboard magnetically leads to the capability to exploit transparently. A company that can integrate correctly will (eventually) be able to recontextualize correctly. Think reconfigurable. What does the term "ROI metrics" really mean? We realize that it is better to utilize virtually than to e-enable extensibly. WorkOS practically invented the term "functionalities". What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-third of your budget for facilitating. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and HTML. We will engineer the capacity of mindshare to transform. The architectures factor is world-class. A company that can drive faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to scale easily. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be revolutionary? Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think ubiquitous. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you matrix vertically then you may also engineer nano-mega-cyber-mega-cyber-intra-cyber-magnetically. What does it really mean to innovate "super-mega-intra-wirelessly"? Think mission-critical.