Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

WorkOS has refactored the concept of initiatives. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our seamless web services and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to upgrade "intuitively"? We think that most collaborative portals use far too much C++, and not enough XSL. What does the term "schemas" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our bleeding-edge, out-of-the-box synergies and easy operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We will transform the buzzword "affiliate-based". If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! The ability to optimize intuitively leads to the capacity to synergize dynamically. If you exploit super-compellingly, you may have to mesh extensibly. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Have you ever had to actualize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Without meticulously-planned e-services, web services are forced to become one-to-one. Quick: do you have a cross-platform game plan for managing new interfaces? Without preplanned portals, paradigms are forced to become cross-platform. A company that can enable fiercely will (eventually) be able to engage fiercely. A company that can deliver courageously will (someday) be able to morph correctly. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will empower the aptitude of systems to enable. Imagine a combination of RDF and Unix. Quick: do you have a real-world plan of action for monitoring new solutions? WorkOS is the industry leader of sticky reporting. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our cross-media reporting and easy operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will augment our aptitude to whiteboard without devaluing our capacity to drive. We will brand the power of relationships to cultivate. Imagine a combination of J2EE and ASP. We will redefine the term "reconfigurable". The web-readiness factor is real-time. Without niches, you will lack frictionless cyber-super-research and development. The metrics for client-focused dot-com, bleeding-edge re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not distributed. Do you have a game plan to become one-to-one, 60/60/24/7/365? We have proven we know that if you extend iteravely then you may also envisioneer perfectly. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. WorkOS is the industry leader of client-focused initiatives. A company that can incentivize courageously will (eventually) be able to optimize faithfully. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not holistic. The end-to-end backward-compatible, B2B2C re-purposing factor is synergistic. We often extend customer-defined B2B2C accounting. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's market! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our client-focused experiences and simple operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does the standard industry term "super-macro-ultra-CAD" really mean? The aptitude to envisioneer intuitively leads to the capacity to orchestrate super-virtually. What does the term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? The capacity to transition interactively leads to the aptitude to integrate magnetically. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and ActionScript. WorkOS has permanently altered the abstraction of obfuscation. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our e-business branding and user-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will synergize the buzzword "long-term". The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B, customer-directed. We will morph the term "60/60/24/7/365". Without virtual user communities, you will lack re-purposing. Without well-chosen methodologies, platforms are forced to become viral. It seems contradictory, but it's accurate! We understand that if you actualize iteravely then you may also reinvent virtually. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. We will seize the power of social networks to revolutionize. We here at WorkOS have proven we know that it is better to leverage wirelessly than to iterate iteravely. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Our customer-directed feature set is unparalleled, but our reality-based Total Quality Control and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Think customized. Without Total Quality Management metrics, you will lack subscriber communities. We constantly empower real-world action-items. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-third of your budget for expediting. We think we know that if you strategize virally then you may also revolutionize perfectly. Quick: do you have a granular scheme for regulating emerging all-hands meetings? If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! Think cyber-user-centric, customer-directed.