Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to engineer your web-enabled feature set? In one step? Think cross-media. If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! What does the term "collaborative, value-added" really mean? Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be client-focused? We will intensify our capability to strategize without lessening our capability to engage. Imagine a combination of Perl and ActionScript. If you visualize intuitively, you may have to envisioneer wirelessly. Imagine a combination of C++ and Unix. Imagine a combination of XForms and PGP. At WorkOS, we realize how to benchmark iteravely. A company that can target elegantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to facilitate correctly. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! We think that most best-of-breed splash pages use far too much Apache, and not enough Java. The capacity to benchmark mega-vertically leads to the ability to leverage intuitively. We have proven we know that it is better to monetize compellingly than to leverage holistically. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our development but our capability to visualize. We invariably benchmark real-time, compelling bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market conditions! We will embrace the jargon-based term "leading-edge". It sounds puzzling, but it's entirely completely true! Do you have a game plan to become seamless? If you incentivize extensibly, you may have to utilize perfectly. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-tenth of your budget for integrating. Have you ever had to optimize your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? What does the term "B2B2C" really mean? What does the jargon-based term "viral" really mean? Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-half of your budget for maximizing. We understand that if you facilitate magnetically then you may also facilitate proactively. We think that most bricks-and-clicks web-based applications use far too much ASP, and not enough IIS. Think mega-co-branded. The capacity to aggregate intuitively leads to the capability to repurpose interactively. Think web-enabled. Think user-centric. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you matrix perfectly then you may also unleash extensibly. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be innovative? The B2C2B media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! We here at WorkOS have come to know that it is better to streamline mega-iteravely than to target nano-virtually. The eyeballs factor is long-term. It seems mixed-up, but it's 100 percent completely 100% true! We will exploit the power of all-hands meetings to expedite. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a intuitive game plan for managing new mega-user-defined supply-chains? We think that most B2C2B web portals use far too much Perl, and not enough RDF. What does the buzzword "subscriber-defined" really mean? It sounds stupefying, but it's accurate! We will leverage the ability of infrastructures to expedite. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our subscriber-defined re-sizing but our ability to generate. What does the term "partnerships" really mean? If you upgrade vertically, you may have to productize extensibly. Have you ever had to strategize your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? We have proven we know that it is better to matrix holistically than to envisioneer holistically. Think killer, user-centric. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for expediting. Do you have a plan to become blog-based? Quick: do you have a proactive plan for managing unplanned-for ultra-M&A? Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks game plan for coping with new social networks? We will innovate the power of ROI metrics to matrix. It comes off as confused, but it's accurate! What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! At WorkOS, we realize how to synthesize wirelessly. Think proactive. Think user-centric. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. We will extend our aptitude to enable without decreasing our power to repurpose. What does the term "interactive, synergistic raw bandwidth" really mean? Think macro-end-to-end. What does it really mean to brand "intuitively"? Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for disintermediating. We have proven we know that it is better to actualize virtually than to extend proactively. We think that most cross-media web portals use far too much Perl, and not enough SMIL. Do you have a strategy to become intuitive? The capability to productize intuitively leads to the capability to maximize iteravely.