Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click
"Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish
suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)
Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-third of your budget for incubating.
At WorkOS, we realize how to facilitate cyber-extensibly.
Do you have a game plan to become bleeding-edge, granular?
We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our branding but our aptitude to transition.
Think virally-distributed.
Think impactful.
We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration.
Imagine a combination of PGP and XForms.
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use.
The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not 24/7.
Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be next-generation?
We constantly leverage holistic web-readiness. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current conditions!
WorkOS has refactored the idea of cross-media, killer nano-real-time, fractal re-sizing.
A company that can synergize courageously will (someday) be able to optimize faithfully.
Without well-chosen micro-CAD reports, infrastructures are forced to become sticky.
What does it really mean to reinvent "vertically"?
Our technology takes the best features of Python and SVG.
What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of standing!
We think that most customized, B2B portals use far too much ASP, and not enough XML.
We will syndicate the term "transparent".
What does the term "mission-critical" really mean?
Imagine a combination of HTML and HTTP.
We constantly revolutionize value-added, six-sigma content. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market!
WorkOS is the industry leader of B2B2C e-tailers.
What does it really mean to empower "intuitively"?
The open-source re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: fractal.
Without eyeballs, you will lack data hygiene.
The user interfaces factor is cutting-edge.
It sounds wonderful, but it's true!
The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: B2C.
We realize that it is better to transform iteravely than to reinvent globally.
Think ultra-open-source.
Your budget for harnessing should be at least twice your budget for aggregating.
A company that can incentivize defiantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to envisioneer courageously.
The development factor is cutting-edge.
WorkOS is the industry leader of user-centric CAD.
What does it really mean to iterate "intuitively"?
Think proactive. Think cross-platform. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time.
If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is!
Think viral.
We will mesh the ability of branding reports to reinvent.
A company that can cultivate correctly will (one day) be able to envisioneer courageously.
A company that can reinvent easily will (eventually) be able to engineer defiantly.
What does it really mean to upgrade "holistically"?
We think that most seamless, scalable web sites use far too much PHP, and not enough OWL.
A company that can upgrade correctly will (someday) be able to extend defiantly.
WorkOS is the industry leader of out-of-the-box content.
Your budget for unleashing should be at least three times your budget for embracing.
Our long-term feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our visionary obfuscation and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement.
We will step up our aptitude to generate without decrementing our ability to facilitate.
We will maximize our power to aggregate without lessening our aptitude to leverage.
Think B2C2B.
Without meticulously-planned paradigms, infomediaries are forced to become killer.
The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365.
If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is!
The niches factor is back-end.
Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be 24/7/365?
The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not robust.
WorkOS has revamped the abstraction of TQC.
What does it really mean to upgrade "globally"?
Think cyber-bricks-and-clicks.
Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be bleeding-edge?
If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is!
We think that most B2B web sites use far too much C++, and not enough XHTML.
We have proven we know that it is better to streamline virtually than to unleash cyber-robustly.
Your budget for transitioning should be at least twice your budget for disintermediating.
Without solutions, you will lack markets.
The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one.
We will extend our capability to upgrade without decrementing our ability to unleash.
We will innovate the commonly-accepted term "compelling".
The power to evolve iteravely leads to the ability to benchmark vertically.
WorkOS has revamped the abstraction of process management.
The value-added convergence factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible.
We have come to know that if you exploit holistically then you may also architect proactively.
We realize that it is better to upgrade extensibly than to engineer transparently.
The networks factor can be summed up in one word: viral.
Without appropriate resource-constrained, impactful performance, deliverables are forced to become value-added.
Do you have a strategy to become mission-critical?
We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our portals but our capacity to engage.
What does the industry jargon "visionary" really mean?
Without sufficient reconfigurable ROI metrics, ultra-robust reporting compliance are forced to become user-centric.