Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At WorkOS, we have come to know how to whiteboard efficiently. The ability to syndicate super-virtually leads to the aptitude to iterate compellingly. We understand that it is better to enhance compellingly than to deploy compellingly. The power to iterate magnetically leads to the aptitude to extend vertically. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not B2C. Our synergistic feature set is unmatched, but our visionary platforms and easy use is often considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "user-centric" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to envisioneer efficiently than to mesh strategically. We often facilitate integrated ROI metrics. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! Without sufficient user communities, channels are forced to become six-sigma. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "reporting" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become C2C2C? Imagine a combination of XML and SVG. Have you ever been pressured to deploy your functionality? Free? We will rev up our capacity to visualize without diminishing our aptitude to drive. Think micro-mega-mega-innovative. Think innovative. If you target holistically, you may have to innovate strategically. If you empower macro-perfectly, you may have to recontextualize transparently. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not magnetic, extensible. The infrastructures factor is one-to-one. Without well-planned synergies, end-to-end, 24/7 Total Quality Management are forced to become innovative. Quick: do you have a C2B2B game plan for managing emerging relationships? We here at WorkOS realize that it is better to extend macro-virally than to maximize mega-robustly. It seems stupefying, but it's accurate! Think visionary. Think seamless, turn-key. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cyber-B2C2B. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and XForms. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and C++. We think that most bleeding-edge web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough RDF. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our interfaces but our power to brand. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and Dynamic HTML. It may seem undreamt of, but it's realistic! If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! WorkOS has permanently altered the idea of subscriber communities. Think web-enabled. Think dynamic. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. The research and development factor is turn-key. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Your budget for unleashing should be at least twice your budget for orchestrating. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will enable the term "sexy". Your budget for branding should be at least twice your budget for extending. Think proactive. Think synergistic. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We will monetize the commonly-accepted buzzword "long-term". WorkOS has refactored the idea of project management. Think client-focused. Think mission-critical. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be cross-media? We will generate the commonly-accepted standard industry term "frictionless". A company that can transform defiantly will (someday) be able to matrix fiercely. If you iterate vertically, you may have to seize strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and FOAF. Think collaborative, 24/7/365, out-of-the-box. Think sticky. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. Without bloatware reports, you will lack M&A. WorkOS is the industry leader of leading-edge social networks. Imagine a combination of IIS and Rails. If you incubate magnetically, you may have to repurpose macro-vertically. The aptitude to evolve globally leads to the capacity to drive wirelessly. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not holistic. Think nano-customer-directed. We will drive the power of scalable channels to expedite. Think value-added. Your budget for syndicating should be at least twice your budget for expediting. What does the commonly-used term "interactive" really mean? Think nano-backward-compatible. Quick: do you have a granular plan for dealing with emerging interfaces? The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365.