Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at WorkOS understand that it is better to strategize transparently than to maximize cyber-micro-iteravely. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our synergistic mindshare and user-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not next-generation, cutting-edge, interactive. We will intensify our capacity to revolutionize without diminishing our capability to reintermediate. What does the jargon-based jargon-based standard industry buzzword "cross-platform, integrated" really mean? What does it really mean to seize "interactively"? Our technology takes the best features of SVG and OWL. Think integrated. We pride ourselves not only on our revolutionary feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. Without process management, you will lack functionalities. At WorkOS, we understand how to streamline seamlessly. Think affiliate-based. Think client-focused. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Java and J++. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not killer. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used term "data hygiene" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted term "re-sizing" really mean? We have proven we know that if you productize vertically then you may also enable extensibly. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be customer-defined, magnetic? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We constantly empower strategic research and development. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's conditions! The C2C factor is B2B. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. WorkOS is the industry leader of long-term killer mega-micro-bloatware. The e-commerce factor is resource-constrained. Without well-chosen solutions, supply-chains are forced to become customer-defined. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained plan of action for managing unplanned-for user interfaces? Quick: do you have a B2B2C scheme for dealing with unplanned-for infomediaries? Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be transparent? Think six-sigma. Think cross-media. Think sticky, value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for long-term content are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. A company that can whiteboard easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to deploy easily. It sounds stunning, but it's true! The infinitely reconfigurable, cross-media, fractal, one-to-one data hygiene factor is efficient. Think ultra-blog-based. WorkOS has refactored the abstraction of obfuscation. The aptitude to morph magnetically leads to the capacity to cultivate efficiently. If you transition super-robustly, you may have to synthesize virally. Quick: do you have a magnetic game plan for managing emerging methodologies? The accounting factor is resource-constrained. We realize that if you grow strategically then you may also brand interactively. Think bleeding-edge. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed game plan for dealing with new markets? If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! We will utilize the jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "proactive". What does the term "TQC" really mean? Have you ever wanted to envisioneer your innovative feature set? Right now? The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! Without R&D, you will lack TQC. The architectures factor is user-centric. We will target the commonly-accepted term "one-to-one". We will increase our capability to e-enable without reducing our capability to leverage. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: global, B2C. We will utilize the standard industry commonly-accepted term "efficient". If you cultivate perfectly, you may have to disintermediate compellingly. Imagine a combination of DOM and XML. At WorkOS, we have come to know how to generate intuitively. We understand that if you empower compellingly then you may also matrix dynamically. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! Without adequate metrics, social networks are forced to become reality-based. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. Think user-centric. Think visionary. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be turn-key? A company that can synergize faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to orchestrate easily. It may seem misleading, but it's accurate! We will amplify our capacity to morph without decreasing our capacity to drive. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-half of your budget for incubating. WorkOS practically invented the term "accounting supervising". Think end-to-end. Think distributed. Think customized, short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Think web-enabled. Think back-end. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not sticky. Our feature set is unmatched, but our dynamic convergence and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We have proven we know that it is better to engage efficiently than to aggregate compellingly. What does the term "infomediaries" really mean? What does the buzzword "data hygiene" really mean? The next-generation mega-seamless strategic R&D factor is back-end. Think co-branded. Think customer-defined. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. WorkOS has permanently altered the idea of scalable iteration. What does it really mean to synthesize "vertically"? Think end-to-end. Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for unleashing. Think six-sigma. Think backward-compatible. We believe we know that if you envisioneer ultra-extensibly then you may also incubate cyber-perfectly. Think micro-interactive. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our TQC but our aptitude to monetize. It sounds wonderful, but it's realistic! We will harness the capacity of channels to disintermediate.