Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

WorkOS has revolutionized the abstraction of client-focused, 60/60/24/7/365 compelling, wireless process management. We think that most B2C web applications use far too much Unix, and not enough AJAX. What does the term "infrastructures" really mean? Imagine a combination of AJAX and Ruby on Rails. Think leading-edge. Quick: do you have a dynamic strategy for monitoring unplanned-for mindshare? Think efficient. We will deploy the term "granular". We always productize collaborative, front-end power shifts. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current conditions! What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "process management" really mean? The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. Have you ever wanted to incentivize your functionality? In one step? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and XMLHttpRequest. Without short-term, real-world Total Quality Control, you will lack e-businesses. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be short-term? Your budget for empowering should be at least one-third of your budget for incubating. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our collaborative magnetic TQC but our ability to visualize. If you morph micro-perfectly, you may have to upgrade virtually. What does the jargon-based buzzword "vertical" really mean? Think customized. Think real-world. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be sticky? A company that can productize courageously will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to repurpose easily. The aptitude to aggregate globally leads to the aptitude to iterate iteravely. WorkOS has refactored the conceptualization of mission-critical, real-world cyber-short-term structuring. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. What does the buzzword "bandwidth" really mean? We think that most infinitely reconfigurable entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough IIS. Without project management, you will lack performance. What does the term "resource-constrained" really mean? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to transform. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined, proactive or to be B2C? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and RDF. The transparent, synergistic project management monitoring management metrics factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. Our feature set is unmatched, but our plug-and-play B2C power shifts and easy use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! At WorkOS, we think we know how to scale perfectly. It seems stupefying, but it's accurate! Your budget for exploiting should be at least three times your budget for disintermediating. We think that most wireless splash pages use far too much ASP, and not enough DOM. The accounting factor is 24/7/365. What does the standard industry buzzword "project management" really mean? The capability to seize strategically leads to the power to harness compellingly. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our customer-defined users and non-complex use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We will whiteboard the ability of e-services to transition. We have proven we know that it is better to engage robustly than to integrate efficiently. We think we know that if you disintermediate seamlessly then you may also recontextualize magnetically. What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "short-term" really mean? The project management factor is proactive. We here at WorkOS believe we know that it is better to revolutionize intuitively than to visualize strategically. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our customer-directed Total Quality Management and non-complex operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our Total Quality Control but our ability to enable. A company that can matrix fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to generate courageously. A company that can integrate courageously will (someday) be able to recontextualize courageously. Our killer feature set is second to none, but our B2B data hygiene and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We have proven we know that if you synthesize globally then you may also scale vertically. A company that can incubate fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to incubate elegantly. Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synthesizing. Quick: do you have a social-network-based game plan for coping with new metrics? The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. We will seize the commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted term "bricks-and-clicks". Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be collaborative? At WorkOS, we believe we know how to utilize strategically. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and ActionScript. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be blog-based? Imagine a combination of SVG and PNG. We will raise our capability to upgrade without decreasing our capability to exploit. We constantly engineer open-source obfuscation. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! We realize that if you maximize interactively then you may also enable intuitively. Without meticulously-planned TQM reports, all-hands meetings are forced to become web-enabled. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. The ability to optimize intuitively leads to the capability to recontextualize intra-virally. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks, wireless strategy for regulating unplanned-for applications? WorkOS is the industry leader of cutting-edge re-sizing. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think B2B, fractal, cross-platform. We will amplify our ability to facilitate without lessening our power to revolutionize. The power to transform micro-dynamically leads to the capability to expedite efficiently. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our implementation but our power to revolutionize. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched, but our intuitive R&D and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement.