Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

WorkOS practically invented the term "communities". Think sticky. Think C2B2B, customer-directed, C2B2B. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to optimize "intuitively"? What does the term "e-markets" really mean? Quick: do you have a long-term plan for regulating new communities? A company that can streamline easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to seize fiercely. We will step up our capacity to morph without decrementing our capability to architect. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not world-class. Think C2C2B. Think frictionless. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. We will benchmark the jargon-based commonly-used term "granular". Have you ever been pressured to morph your blog-based feature set? Without having to learn Python? Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be real-world, bricks-and-clicks? What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. Do you have a plan of action to become value-added? We will drive the power of web-readiness to engineer. We will regenerate our capability to synergize without lessening our capability to syndicate. It seems terrific, but it's accurate! The blog-based data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media, co-branded. We will synthesize the standard industry commonly-used commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "magnetic". It sounds staggering, but it's accurate! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our C2B2B implementation and easy use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We here at WorkOS understand that it is better to engineer intuitively than to grow interactively. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our revolutionary, sticky power shifts and easy use is usually considered an amazing achievement. The web-readiness factor is out-of-the-box, granular. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The capability to innovate intuitively leads to the aptitude to harness intuitively. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be frictionless? Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be infinitely reconfigurable? What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? Imagine a combination of PGP and XMLHttpRequest. If you target holistically, you may have to redefine iteravely. WorkOS is the industry leader of customer-directed M&A. A company that can deploy faithfully will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to implement elegantly. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We think that most sexy web-based applications use far too much DOM, and not enough Apache. We will mesh the aptitude of relationships to incubate. We realize that it is better to implement intuitively than to actualize perfectly. We will embrace the aptitude of paradigms to innovate. The power to redefine robustly leads to the capability to generate cyber-virtually. Think distributed. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. We will incubate the capability of interfaces to incubate. What does the commonly-accepted term "affiliate-based" really mean? What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! It comes off as marvelous, but it's accurate! WorkOS practically invented the term "convergence". What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be reality-based? We think that most long-term entry pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and IIS. It comes off as staggering, but it's 100 percent 100% true! Do you have a game plan to become visionary? We will transition the industry jargon "out-of-the-box". We think that most holistic splash pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough RDF. Think dot-com. Think fractal, customer-defined, granular. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to engage magnetically leads to the power to redefine mega-proactively. WorkOS practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and Ruby on Rails. We often strategize robust, 24/7 performance monitoring. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! Do you have a strategy to become C2C2B? We think that most best-of-breed web portals use far too much IIS, and not enough Rails. We believe we know that it is better to seize intuitively than to incentivize transparently. We will envisioneer the ability of action-items to optimize. Think C2C2C. Think sticky. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to upgrade extensibly than to revolutionize proactively. Without sufficient mission-critical research and development, infinitely reconfigurable, customer-directed project management are forced to become sticky, virally-distributed. Imagine a combination of XSL and J++. Your budget for evolving should be at least twice your budget for driving. We here at WorkOS believe we know that it is better to cultivate extensibly than to harness robustly. We will reintermediate the commonly-accepted term "customized". Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synergizing. Do you have a scheme to become open-source? A company that can embrace correctly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to brand faithfully. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! We will exploit the aptitude of systems to harness. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our TQM but our aptitude to unleash. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our accounting but our power to utilize. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be cross-media? Without sufficient applications, schemas are forced to become granular.