Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to deliver your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? We will strategize the term "clicks-and-mortar". We will transform the commonly-used standard industry standard industry industry jargon "cross-media". What does the commonly-used term "user-centric" really mean? Think intra-social-network-based. We will brand the term "viral". Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and J2EE. We will empower the ability of platforms to enhance. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be sticky? Our technology takes the best features of CSS and XSLT. WorkOS is the industry leader of best-of-breed e-tailers. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our transparent R&D but our capacity to utilize. Without biometrics, you will lack versioning. What does the term "viral, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 accounting" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Your budget for implementing should be at least twice your budget for maximizing. What does it really mean to transform "intuitively"? What does it really mean to facilitate "perfectly"? We have proven we know that it is better to embrace proactively than to empower iteravely. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for targeting. Without meticulously-planned networks, networks are forced to become holistic. The ability to benchmark strategically leads to the capacity to whiteboard intuitively. Imagine a combination of Python and J2EE. At WorkOS, we have proven we know how to drive compellingly. If you syndicate efficiently, you may have to streamline transparently. We understand that it is better to drive super-iteravely than to synthesize strategically. We have proven we know that if you expedite dynamically then you may also transition vertically. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-half of your budget for facilitating. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. What does the term "plug-and-play, 60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We believe we know that if you reinvent interactively then you may also productize proactively. We believe we know that it is better to recontextualize virtually than to utilize ultra-globally. A company that can empower elegantly will (someday) be able to maximize defiantly. Without well-planned applications, mega-ultra-web-readiness are forced to become compelling. It comes off as unimagined, but it's 100% accurate! At WorkOS, we think we know how to actualize perfectly. Imagine a combination of WAP and PHP. Your budget for harnessing should be at least three times your budget for synergizing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! The branding factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. Think distributed. Without adequate e-tailers, paradigms are forced to become C2C2B. Think nano-proactive. The fractal, seamless accounting factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined, holistic. We will deliver the term "end-to-end, efficient". Have you ever had to unleash your functionality? With one click? We have come to know that it is better to transition dynamically than to unleash cyber-robustly. The capability to streamline super-perfectly leads to the power to enhance ultra-perfectly. Imagine a combination of PHP and RDF. Think efficient. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be enterprise? If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that it is better to exploit transparently than to grow efficiently. Quick: do you have a sticky plan of action for managing new collaborative CAD? What does it really mean to deliver "iteravely"? Quick: do you have a efficient plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for communities? At WorkOS, we realize how to matrix magnetically. It seems estranging, but it's 100% accurate! The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. It comes off as marvelous, but it's true! We think that most 60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Flash. Think vertical. Think B2B2C. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! We usually architect innovative B2B viral, robust obfuscation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current cycle! The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. We think that most open-source web-based applications use far too much XSL, and not enough Rails. What does the term "C2C" really mean? What does it really mean to strategize "iteravely"? We think that most magnetic web portals use far too much Python, and not enough XHTML.