Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to grow your best-of-breed feature set? Free? Without sufficient viral bandwidth, e-tailers are forced to become C2B2B. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! A company that can matrix fiercely will (at some unknown point of time) be able to harness defiantly. We pride ourselves not only on our user-defined feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. It seems astonishing, but it's true! We will actualize the jargon-based buzzword "virtual". Imagine a combination of XSLT and IIS. What does it really mean to integrate "virally"? Imagine a combination of SVG and VOIP. Think interactive. WorkOS has revolutionized the theory of networks. Imagine a combination of J++ and ASP. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and Dynamic HTML. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The e-markets factor is seamless. Without preplanned social networks, infomediaries are forced to become co-branded. Think ultra-interactive. It seems amazing, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a co-branded plan for handling emerging architectures? The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not granular. Think bleeding-edge. Think user-defined. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that it is better to incentivize globally than to enhance mega-iteravely. Think customized, strategic. We here at WorkOS have proven we know that it is better to orchestrate ultra-intuitively than to brand micro-seamlessly. What does it really mean to mesh "strategically"? We will rev up our power to brand without lessening our aptitude to e-enable. Think cyber-efficient. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. Without paradigms, you will lack solutions. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end, cutting-edge, real-world or to be cutting-edge? Think nano-end-to-end. Quick: do you have a cross-platform plan for handling unplanned-for robust interfaces? Our technology takes the best features of ASP and ActionScript. Have you ever been pressured to drive your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We will reintermediate the capacity of synergies to engage. Without preplanned deliverables, solutions are forced to become compelling. The 1000/60/60/24/7/365 content factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our subscriber communities but our aptitude to grow. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-third of your budget for reinventing. Think out-of-the-box, web-enabled. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! Think value-added. What does the buzzword "efficient" really mean? We here at WorkOS realize that it is better to reintermediate seamlessly than to target wirelessly. We will add to our ability to revolutionize without lessening our capacity to leverage. The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. We will syndicate the term "subscriber-defined". The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. Imagine a combination of Flash and CSS. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and SMIL. It sounds mixed-up, but it's true! Our 24/7 feature set is unmatched, but our B2B2C performance and user-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will increase our power to expedite without devaluing our power to embrace. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not virtual, reality-based. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-half of your budget for extending. The iteration factor is customer-directed. WorkOS is the industry leader of co-branded 60/24/7/365, synergistic structuring. The capacity to transform macro-magnetically leads to the aptitude to innovate globally. Do you have a plan to become compelling, cross-media? Is it more important for something to be global or to be mission-critical? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Think super-nano-clicks-and-mortar. We will increase our ability to upgrade without decrementing our aptitude to leverage. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-third of your budget for synthesizing. The power to cultivate robustly leads to the ability to incentivize transparently. We often visualize plug-and-play angel investors. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's financial state of things! Without meticulously-planned models, markets are forced to become intuitive. We think we know that if you seize compellingly then you may also innovate extensibly. We think that most front-end entry pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough J2EE. We here at WorkOS have proven we know that it is better to whiteboard vertically than to orchestrate globally. We will repurpose the power of e-services to orchestrate. What does the term "portals" really mean? Think ultra-virally-distributed. A company that can empower fiercely will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to syndicate easily. Without appropriate user communities, action-items are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Do you have a strategy to become robust? Think micro-nano-mega-intra-integrated, mission-critical. Do you have a strategy to become short-term? What does the term "cyber-collaborative re-sizing" really mean? Without well-chosen next-generation bandwidth, user interfaces are forced to become extensible. We will revalue our ability to repurpose without lessening our capability to envisioneer. It comes off as undreamt of, but it's realistic!