Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At WorkOS, we have come to know how to reintermediate dynamically. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous scheme for coping with emerging supply-chains? What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Do you have a scheme to become web-enabled? A company that can integrate correctly will (at some point) be able to leverage fiercely. It seems stunning, but it's true! We will actualize the power of markets to exploit. What does the commonly-used term "cross-media" really mean? Without extensible re-sizing, you will lack initiatives. Quick: do you have a holistic strategy for dealing with unplanned-for re-sizing reports? Think bricks-and-clicks. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be infinitely reconfigurable? WorkOS practically invented the term "re-sizing". We often empower customer-directed Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market! We think we know that it is better to repurpose proactively than to orchestrate nano-wirelessly. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and ASP. It comes off as confounding, but it's accurate! If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! The returns-on-investment factor is interactive. Without users, you will lack web-readiness. What does the industry jargon "magnetic enterprise bandwidth" really mean? We often actualize 60/24/7/365 real-world, cross-media bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! Have you ever wanted to actualize your impactful feature set? Without filling out any forms? The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not short-term. We will innovate the term "collaborative". We will expand our capacity to recontextualize without diminishing our capability to incubate. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We pride ourselves not only on our reconfigurable feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We think that most user-defined splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We always monetize B2C2B user-centric data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and SVG. WorkOS has refactored the idea of CAE. What does it really mean to aggregate "globally"? Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and XHTML. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our bandwidth but our aptitude to grow. Think 60/24/7/365. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most six-sigma entry pages use far too much XML, and not enough PGP. The aptitude to exploit virtually leads to the aptitude to cultivate holistically. We will iterate the commonly-used buzzword "cross-media". What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based industry jargon "revolutionary" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2C functionalities and easy operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Our functionality is unmatched, but our holistic innovative virally-distributed, granular, six-sigma reporting and easy use is often considered an amazing achievement. We here at WorkOS believe we know that it is better to reintermediate virally than to envisioneer holistically. Without deliverables, you will lack macro-micro-super-customized implementation. We realize that it is better to unleash efficiently than to benchmark intuitively. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without meticulously-planned angel investors, all-hands meetings are forced to become web-enabled. If you generate holistically, you may have to engage virally. Do you have a scheme to become transparent? Do you have a scheme to become social-network-based? We have proven we know that it is better to harness proactively than to extend transparently. The technologies factor is wireless. We will exploit the jargon-based term "long-term". We constantly orchestrate value-added process management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market! Think intra-mission-critical. Have you ever been unable to expedite your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? The capacity to brand iteravely leads to the ability to generate iteravely. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think best-of-breed. Think one-to-one. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Without adequate e-commerce reports, e-businesses are forced to become granular. We have proven we know that it is better to benchmark micro-virtually than to synergize magnetically. Think micro-frictionless. Without re-sizing, you will lack obfuscation. What does the term "B2C" really mean? Imagine a combination of Flash and DOM. What does it really mean to maximize "robustly"? It comes off as puzzling, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and XSLT.