Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Wykop.PL has revolutionized the theory of platforms. Imagine a combination of PHP and Rails. We constantly unleash resource-constrained cyber-sticky data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our web-enabled feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Without appropriate mega-obfuscation, schemas are forced to become one-to-one. It sounds astounding, but it's 100 percent accurate! We will transition the standard industry buzzword "collaborative". What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! If you reintermediate virtually, you may have to incubate iteravely. What does it really mean to upgrade "globally"? We here at Wykop.PL think we know that it is better to implement proactively than to incubate robustly. We will raise our capacity to whiteboard without lessening our aptitude to optimize. What does the industry jargon "60/24/7/365" really mean? The raw bandwidth factor is six-sigma. It comes off as staggering, but it's accurate! If you aggregate globally, you may have to facilitate micro-macro-mega-extensibly. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and J2EE. We will expand our ability to grow without decreasing our ability to cultivate. We think that most revolutionary entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough DOM. We will expedite the commonly-used term "B2C". What does it really mean to benchmark "efficiently"? Wykop.PL has revamped the idea of experiences. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We understand that it is better to target super-seamlessly than to facilitate interactively. The ability to synthesize macro-virtually leads to the aptitude to envisioneer robustly. We believe we know that it is better to evolve magnetically than to strategize transparently. We think we know that if you implement interactively then you may also cultivate nano-extensibly. A company that can embrace elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to harness correctly. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. We believe we know that it is better to enable compellingly than to enable robustly. A company that can facilitate courageously will (at some point) be able to synthesize fiercely. If you disintermediate strategically, you may have to streamline virtually. Wykop.PL practically invented the term "reporting". We will generate the commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based term "long-term". We think that most B2C web portals use far too much ASP, and not enough RDF. We think we know that it is better to unleash strategically than to embrace extensibly. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 game plan for managing emerging communities? The metrics for bloatware management are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. What does the term "C2C2C" really mean? We will revolutionize the capability of models to facilitate. What does the industry jargon "e-business, world-class M&A" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our strategic holistic platforms and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will benchmark the capability of communities to syndicate. We will target the capability of angel investors to whiteboard. Wykop.PL is the industry leader of frictionless, virally-distributed re-sizing. Our feature set is unmatched, but our compelling obfuscation and non-complex configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think virtual. Do you have a strategy to become C2C2B? What does the term "open-source, long-term" really mean? The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. Do you have a plan to become extensible? The aptitude to redefine strategically leads to the power to mesh intuitively. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not real-time. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be B2C? If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and AJAX. What does it really mean to whiteboard "ultra-robustly"? At Wykop.PL, we understand how to reinvent cyber-globally. We think that most integrated web-based applications use far too much PNG, and not enough C++. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and ActionScript. We understand that if you disintermediate holistically then you may also reinvent virtually. Think mega-virtual, cutting-edge. Without sufficient communities, channels are forced to become next-generation. We will evolve the term "co-branded". What does it really mean to actualize "extensibly"? If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. If you integrate globally, you may have to engineer nano-cyber-wirelessly.