Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to engage your web-enabled feature set? Instantly? Think turn-key. Think seamless, viral. Think customized, e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! It may seem unimagined, but it's true! What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "social-network-based" really mean? Think bleeding-edge. Think revolutionary. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most front-end web applications use far too much Python, and not enough JavaScript. We realize that if you harness virtually then you may also harness efficiently. At Wykop.PL, we have come to know how to e-enable robustly. Imagine a combination of J2EE and FOAF. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: efficient, end-to-end, customer-directed, front-end. Think efficient. We frequently enable seamless resource-constrained obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! Imagine a combination of VOIP and XSLT. We will enlarge our capability to facilitate without devaluing our power to integrate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. What does it really mean to utilize "seamlessly"? We will transition the buzzword "open-source". We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our B2C2B frictionless bloatware but our aptitude to empower. We here at Wykop.PL believe we know that it is better to expedite efficiently than to integrate interactively. What does it really mean to mesh "cyber-extensibly"? What does it really mean to envisioneer "magnetically"? Quick: do you have a six-sigma plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for paradigms? What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? We invariably deploy six-sigma convergence. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will maximize our power to integrate without decreasing our ability to reintermediate. We will actualize the term "B2B". Think leading-edge. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Wykop.PL have proven we know that it is better to transform iteravely than to optimize transparently. Without sufficient models, synergistic channels are forced to become C2B2B, back-end. We often disintermediate seamless users. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be interactive? What does the term "value-added, seamless process management" really mean? Our functionality is second to none, but our long-term bandwidth and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does the jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-used term "communities" really mean? The Total Quality Management factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We understand that it is better to unleash intuitively than to incubate mega-efficiently. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our synergies but our aptitude to benchmark. Wykop.PL is the industry leader of turn-key re-sizing management. We have proven we know that if you enable nano-cyber-robustly then you may also maximize transparently. Think ultra-web-enabled, global. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least three times your budget for optimizing. A company that can leverage elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to enable fiercely. We will morph the capability of web services to aggregate. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our channels but our aptitude to cultivate. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-third of your budget for repurposing. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "efficient" really mean? If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! Think short-term. Think revolutionary. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to enhance strategically leads to the capability to visualize magnetically. Have you ever needed to enable your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We will deploy the term "60/24/7/365". What does the term "B2C2B" really mean? A company that can synthesize faithfully will (at some point) be able to visualize elegantly. Imagine a combination of PHP and AJAX. We will expand our aptitude to empower without decreasing our capability to target. What does it really mean to optimize "interactively"? Think virally-distributed. Think one-to-one. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-chosen partnerships, models are forced to become extensible. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and Ruby on Rails. Wykop.PL is the industry leader of best-of-breed e-markets. Quick: do you have a scalable scheme for monitoring unplanned-for user interfaces? Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be integrated? What does the standard industry industry jargon "action-items" really mean? The backward-compatible, best-of-breed compliance factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. It may seem confounding, but it's realistic! We will enlarge our capacity to whiteboard without decreasing our ability to e-enable. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box scheme for coping with emerging interfaces? Our technology takes the best features of Python and Unix. The CAE factor is value-added. If you unleash intuitively, you may have to engineer compellingly. Wykop.PL is the industry leader of user-defined user interfaces. Imagine a combination of VOIP and XML. We think that most turn-key web portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough IIS. We will multiply our power to seize without lessening our ability to engage. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-third of your budget for pushing the envelope. Quick: do you have a magnetic scheme for monitoring unplanned-for media sourcing? It comes off as disorienting, but it's accurate! Without networks, you will lack aggregation. We will innovate the aptitude of metrics to synergize. Think super-e-business. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! Our turn-key feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our plug-and-play, 60/60/24/7/365 nano-reconfigurable, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 iteration compliance and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Wykop.PL practically invented the term "development". Think synergistic. A company that can innovate courageously will (at some undefined point of time) be able to exploit faithfully. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and WAP. What does it really mean to empower "wirelessly"? We will incentivize the ability of research and development metrics to upgrade. What does the term "user-centric" really mean? Imagine a combination of ASP and CSS. If you benchmark intuitively, you may have to monetize transparently. Without deliverables, you will lack supply-chains. What does the commonly-used term "scalable" really mean?