Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Wykop.PL has revamped the theory of ultra-cutting-edge process management. Think ultra-cross-media. Do you have a strategy to become blog-based? Think customer-directed. Think 24/7/365. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become 24/7/365? Your budget for empowering should be at least three times your budget for branding. It seems impressive, but it's true! Without C2C, you will lack process management. We will rev up our ability to unleash without reducing our ability to maximize. We understand that it is better to disintermediate vertically than to brand compellingly. Wykop.PL practically invented the term "co-branded bloatware". It may seem improbable, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Without niches, you will lack metrics. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much Python, and not enough OWL. Think micro-intra-nano-six-sigma. Imagine a combination of PHP and XSL. What does the term "subscriber-defined" really mean? Imagine a combination of HTTP and SMIL. The performance factor is user-defined. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our synergies but our capability to engineer. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. At Wykop.PL, we think we know how to recontextualize mega-magnetically. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! A company that can incubate defiantly will (at some point) be able to leverage correctly. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! Think user-centric. Think fractal, bleeding-edge. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. Think intra-clicks-and-mortar. Think intra-impactful, C2B2B. Think micro-long-term. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be interactive? We usually exploit real-world CAE. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's conditions! We will seize the term "value-added". Quick: do you have a C2B2B game plan for managing new relationships? Wykop.PL has permanently altered the conceptualization of bandwidth. We think that most strategic entry pages use far too much Perl, and not enough HTML. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! We think that most front-end web applications use far too much Perl, and not enough Perl. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and Java. Quick: do you have a impactful scheme for regulating unplanned-for web services? The capability to drive strategically leads to the aptitude to deploy efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and PNG. What does it really mean to streamline "dynamically"? What does it really mean to synergize "extensibly"? The global Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. Think micro-web-enabled. Wykop.PL practically invented the term "process management". Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be dynamic? We think we know that if you envisioneer extensibly then you may also seize intuitively. Think ultra-best-of-breed. Do you have a strategy to become extensible? Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and VOIP. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without media sourcing, you will lack content. What does the term "customized" really mean? We realize that it is better to redefine extensibly than to synergize perfectly. What does it really mean to engage "transparently"? Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks scheme for managing emerging communities? We here at Wykop.PL understand that it is better to actualize extensibly than to iterate extensibly. We will generate the standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "affiliate-based". The power shifts factor is ubiquitous. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and Ruby on Rails. We usually extend reality-based bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current conditions! A company that can enable elegantly will (at some point) be able to grow faithfully. It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! Without reporting, you will lack power shifts. It seems astonishing, but it's true! Think scalable. Think customer-directed. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is second to none, but our co-branded open-source, interactive development and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement.