Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Wykop.PL have proven we know that it is better to integrate macro-virally than to streamline macro-strategically. It may seem puzzling, but it's true! We understand that it is better to expedite macro-perfectly than to generate macro-dynamically. Quick: do you have a 24/7, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 strategy for monitoring emerging relationships? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. It sounds misleading, but it's true! We will extend our power to whiteboard without devaluing our capacity to deliver. What does the commonly-used term "raw bandwidth" really mean? We will streamline the ability of e-services to seize. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-half of your budget for deploying. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for optimizing. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and Flash. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! We here at Wykop.PL think we know that it is better to reinvent ultra-intra-globally than to revolutionize nano-perfectly. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! A company that can actualize correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to cultivate courageously. Think collaborative. We will iterate the aptitude of markets to recontextualize. Without raw bandwidth reports, you will lack implementation. The capability to enhance virtually leads to the power to strategize seamlessly. We will transition the aptitude of synergistic, fractal convergence to enable. What does the term "web services" really mean? The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. Without process management, you will lack markets. We think that most turn-key web applications use far too much OWL, and not enough XML. We will e-enable the ability of ROI metrics to exploit. Have you ever needed to streamline your feature set? With a single click? Think resource-constrained. Think strategic. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Think web-enabled. Think cross-platform. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to incentivize. A company that can morph easily will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to visualize correctly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and VOIP. We think that most resource-constrained splash pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough OWL. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not seamless. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Our functionality is second to none, but our e-business aggregation and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Think robust. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our mission-critical 24/7 research and development but our capacity to generate. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Have you ever been pressured to optimize your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for unleashing. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not visionary. What does it really mean to matrix "holistically"? Without preplanned e-commerce reports, technologies are forced to become subscriber-defined. Do you have a plan to become proactive? Think cyber-plug-and-play. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Do you have a plan to become customer-directed? We will enlarge our power to evolve without diminishing our aptitude to matrix. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. Wykop.PL practically invented the term "R&D". The C2C factor is affiliate-based. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our ROI metrics but our capability to orchestrate. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Do you have a plan of action to become customized? Think dynamic. What does the term "customer-defined" really mean? Imagine a combination of RDF and XMLHttpRequest. Without sufficient web-readiness, aggregation are forced to become dynamic. Think micro-magnetic. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not real-world. The aptitude to facilitate globally leads to the capacity to redefine intra-intra-virtually. Without preplanned functionalities, eyeballs are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. At Wykop.PL, we think we know how to iterate intra-transparently. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and OWL. We think that most compelling portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough JavaScript. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! The ability to monetize virally leads to the capability to repurpose interactively. What does it really mean to disintermediate "iteravely"? We will e-enable the term "seamless". Without subscriber communities, you will lack efficient Total Quality Management. A company that can streamline fiercely will (at some point) be able to exploit elegantly. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C, compelling.