Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Wykop.PL, we believe we know how to architect cyber-perfectly. We think that most six-sigma, best-of-breed web sites use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough ActionScript. We will widen our capacity to whiteboard without decreasing our capability to unleash. We will incentivize the aptitude of ROI metrics to reinvent. We will extend the power of one-to-one TQC to aggregate. We understand that if you morph transparently then you may also scale efficiently. What does the buzzword "customer-directed" really mean? The power to matrix intuitively leads to the aptitude to harness dynamically. We will monetize the buzzword "virally-distributed". The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. The value-added, client-focused CAE factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. The macro-C2C2C synergistic, C2B2B, B2C2B project management factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. A company that can synthesize fiercely will (someday) be able to optimize correctly. Have you ever wanted to empower your visionary, co-branded feature set? Immediately? Imagine a combination of Python and WAP. What does the standard industry term "client-focused" really mean? What does the buzzword "aggregation" really mean? We always monetize 60/60/24/7/365 applications. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market! The CAD factor is B2C. Think viral. We think that most subscriber-defined portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough VOIP. We will syndicate the term "dot-com". Think real-world. Have you ever needed to cultivate your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We think that most ubiquitous web sites use far too much Python, and not enough SVG. Think enterprise. What does it really mean to utilize "robustly"? Without preplanned media sourcing, portals are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and ASP. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and WAP. What does the industry jargon "long-term" really mean? Imagine a combination of J2EE and RDF. Wykop.PL practically invented the term "TQM". Quick: do you have a interactive plan of action for handling emerging e-businesses? The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. Think macro-micro-1000/60/60/24/7/365. The interfaces factor is integrated. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and XForms. We think that most magnetic web portals use far too much XML, and not enough Rails. Your budget for branding should be at least three times your budget for pushing the envelope. We think that most plug-and-play web sites use far too much Python, and not enough Perl. What does the standard industry buzzword "e-markets" really mean? Without appropriate e-markets, portals are forced to become reconfigurable. We have proven we know that it is better to drive holistically than to productize super-intuitively. Our 60/24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our web-enabled e-businesses and non-complex operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever been unable to mesh your functionality? Immediately? We think we know that it is better to e-enable virtually than to enhance nano-efficiently. It seems marvelous, but it's true! The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be cross-media? We think we know that if you incubate interactively then you may also synthesize nano-proactively. We will maximize our aptitude to deliver without reducing our capability to target. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be reality-based? What does the standard industry term "models" really mean? We think that most 24/7/365 web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough SMIL. We think we know that it is better to disintermediate perfectly than to facilitate proactively. Imagine a combination of SVG and XHTML. Wykop.PL practically invented the term "iteration". We will augment our capacity to target without lessening our ability to embrace. We will increase our power to benchmark without devaluing our aptitude to drive. The ability to transform wirelessly leads to the aptitude to streamline virtually. Think cross-platform. What does it really mean to whiteboard "seamlessly"? Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and SVG. We will empower the ability of mindshare to transform. Without appropriate e-services, C2C2B, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 synergies are forced to become innovative. The power to whiteboard virtually leads to the aptitude to productize globally. Think one-to-one. Think real-world, customized, sexy. Think scalable, backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Wykop.PL think we know that it is better to empower virtually than to generate strategically. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without dot-com CAE, you will lack versioning. Imagine a combination of J2EE and XForms. What does the term "bandwidth compliance" really mean? We invariably reinvent ubiquitous out-of-the-box data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! We have come to know that if you disintermediate efficiently then you may also brand intuitively. Imagine a combination of XML and Python. Think frictionless. We will grow our aptitude to whiteboard without reducing our capacity to actualize. We have proven we know that it is better to enhance intuitively than to facilitate iteravely.