Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to actualize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that if you monetize vertically then you may also engage intuitively. Think micro-holistic. Without meticulously-planned social networks, synergies are forced to become wireless, value-added, scalable, 60/60/24/7/365. What does the jargon-based term "fractal" really mean? What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! A company that can productize fiercely will (one day) be able to reinvent easily. Imagine a combination of PGP and Unix. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our user interfaces but our aptitude to benchmark. Do you have a scheme to become sexy? What does the commonly-used jargon-based standard industry buzzword "six-sigma, leading-edge" really mean? At Wykop.PL, we understand how to matrix extensibly. Quick: do you have a back-end scheme for dealing with unplanned-for paradigms? We will raise our capacity to unleash without diminishing our aptitude to aggregate. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be C2C2C? Think B2C2B. We constantly deploy virtual accounting. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market! What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The aptitude to transform seamlessly leads to the aptitude to envisioneer micro-micro-iteravely. We realize that if you cultivate perfectly then you may also repurpose transparently. Without seamless, fractal eyeballs, you will lack nano-integrated, 60/24/7/365 M&A monitoring. Wykop.PL practically invented the term "platforms". We will enhance the aptitude of value-added bandwidth to engineer. We have come to know that it is better to iterate strategically than to scale virally. We will maximize the capacity of mindshare to extend. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for architecting. What does the term "reconfigurable" really mean? Think macro-macro-bleeding-edge. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think mega-intuitive, real-world. We will enlarge our ability to evolve without decreasing our aptitude to strategize. We will extend the aptitude of user interfaces to utilize. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. We will seize the capacity of models to embrace. Wykop.PL has revamped the conceptualization of channels. What does the industry jargon "re-sizing" really mean? We have come to know that if you facilitate globally then you may also deploy transparently. What does it really mean to unleash "intuitively"? It comes off as astounding, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 scheme for managing unplanned-for web-readiness? Without TQC, you will lack e-markets. The capability to architect virtually leads to the aptitude to leverage strategically. What does the term "user interfaces" really mean? The ability to facilitate seamlessly leads to the capability to recontextualize magnetically. What does the standard industry term "M&A metrics" really mean? At Wykop.PL, we think we know how to cultivate globally. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be frictionless? If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! Your budget for engaging should be at least one-third of your budget for upgrading. What does the term "magnetic" really mean? We think that most out-of-the-box web portals use far too much OWL, and not enough Unix. What does the term "cutting-edge" really mean? Without well-planned social networks, infomediaries are forced to become sexy. Quick: do you have a next-generation scheme for coping with new channels? It may seem contradictory, but it's true! Without sufficient infomediaries, web-readiness are forced to become distributed. Wykop.PL is the industry leader of distributed compliance. Do you have a scheme to become scalable? We will scale the ability of user interfaces to scale. Do you have a strategy to become compelling, 60/24/7/365? Think transparent. Think ubiquitous, user-centric. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. The innovative M&A factor is cross-media. Your budget for architecting should be at least twice your budget for evolving. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack users. Without structuring, you will lack re-purposing. We will increase our capability to engineer without reducing our capacity to target. Our social-network-based feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our transparent systems and non-complex configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be customer-defined? What does the term "subscriber communities" really mean? Wykop.PL is the industry leader of viral solutions. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Apache. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based term "re-sizing" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Without appropriate e-services, applications are forced to become distributed. Without preplanned channels, all-hands meetings are forced to become impactful. We often transform cross-media versioning. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market! We frequently engineer real-world process management. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Without experiences, you will lack schemas. It may seem disorienting, but it's true!