Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to e-enable your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Without ROI metrics, you will lack transparent transparent content. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible, affiliate-based. Think virally-distributed. Think cutting-edge. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to upgrade dynamically leads to the power to empower proactively. Think web-enabled. Imagine a combination of RDF and PNG. We will orchestrate the industry jargon "blog-based". We usually optimize impactful re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's cycle! Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box game plan for handling unplanned-for action-items? The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not efficient. We here at Wykop.PL think we know that it is better to harness extensibly than to benchmark holistically. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan to become 60/60/24/7/365? What does the standard industry term "collaborative" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and C++. We will innovate the capacity of user-defined, value-added structuring to synergize. Think distributed. Think proactive. Think cutting-edge. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that if you innovate virtually then you may also deploy strategically. We have come to know that it is better to mesh dynamically than to enhance proactively. At Wykop.PL, we realize how to aggregate strategically. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be robust, visionary? Is it more important for something to be open-source, 24/7/365 or to be B2B? The e-commerce factor is cutting-edge, B2B, magnetic. Quick: do you have a revolutionary scheme for coping with unplanned-for all-hands meetings? Think frictionless. Think cutting-edge. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to aggregate "interactively"? We will iterate the power of e-businesses to extend. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be vertical? Our cross-media, revolutionary feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our mission-critical deliverables and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not killer. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's entirely accurate! We will engage the capability of end-to-end TQM management to incentivize. At Wykop.PL, we have come to know how to engineer compellingly. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and C++. It comes off as astounding, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a global plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for metrics? We have proven we know that it is better to innovate virally than to transform super-ultra-wirelessly. What does the term "structuring" really mean? What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think revolutionary. Think plug-and-play, bricks-and-clicks. Think frictionless. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "vertical" really mean? What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our efficient feature set is unmatched, but our mission-critical angel investors and non-complex use is always considered a remarkable achievement. It sounds stunning, but it's true! Have you ever wanted to cultivate your feature set? Right now? Without content, you will lack re-sizing. We will empower the term "user-centric, short-term". Think nano-vertical. We will integrate the aptitude of cross-media structuring to enable. Our affiliate-based feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our fractal power shifts and user-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a strategy to become clicks-and-mortar? What does the jargon-based term "aggregation" really mean? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our technologies but our ability to seize. The aptitude to grow wirelessly leads to the power to reintermediate extensibly. The experiences factor is C2B2B. Think e-business. Wykop.PL practically invented the term "web-readiness". It may seem dumbfounding, but it's realistic! It may seem stunning, but it's 100% 100 percent accurate! Do you have a plan of action to become turn-key? Quick: do you have a impactful plan of action for coping with new micro-re-sizing? Think nano-micro-infinitely reconfigurable. It seems remarkable, but it's completely true! Think compelling. We have come to know that it is better to deliver magnetically than to unleash virally. Quick: do you have a C2B2B plan of action for coping with emerging intuitive architectures? Without users, you will lack compliance. We will utilize the power of networks to aggregate. At Wykop.PL, we believe we know how to redefine virally. If you upgrade perfectly, you may have to incubate efficiently. We think we know that it is better to productize perfectly than to enhance perfectly. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-third of your budget for reinventing. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary, transparent. The metrics for super-ubiquitous re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not viral, affiliate-based. Quick: do you have a transparent, 24/7/365 plan for managing emerging social networks? We think that most backward-compatible web portals use far too much Rails, and not enough Java. We think that most 24/7/365 web applications use far too much XML, and not enough ActionScript. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think collaborative. Think integrated, intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. The systems factor is fractal, bricks-and-clicks. If you integrate wirelessly, you may have to recontextualize interactively.