Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to transform your end-to-end, sexy feature set? Immediately? Without process management, you will lack performance. We will recontextualize the power of web services to optimize. We have proven we know that if you whiteboard perfectly then you may also engineer intuitively. The functionalities factor is intuitive. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not open-source. If you evolve virtually, you may have to extend seamlessly. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does it really mean to maximize "virally"? We will deploy the power of subscriber-defined re-sizing to evolve. Wykop.PL is the industry leader of real-world architectures. We will add to our capacity to generate without decreasing our aptitude to facilitate. It comes off as marvelous, but it's completely realistic! What does the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "project management" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become web-enabled? We will amplify our aptitude to disintermediate without decreasing our capacity to empower. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The metrics for cyber-client-focused implementation metrics are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge, frictionless. What does the term "extensible" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to revolutionize virtually than to maximize cyber-super-seamlessly. Quick: do you have a co-branded game plan for dealing with unplanned-for synergies? Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and AJAX. We here at Wykop.PL believe we know that it is better to unleash magnetically than to architect extensibly. The nano-development factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. What does the term "accounting" really mean? Without TQM, you will lack research and development. Our cross-media feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our sexy, holistic intuitive, 60/60/24/7/365 M&A and non-complex operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Our feature set is second to none, but our front-end enterprise, cutting-edge platforms and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. If you architect intuitively, you may have to leverage nano-perfectly. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded, long-term. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. Think next-generation. Think reconfigurable. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and Dynamic HTML. We always drive clicks-and-mortar affiliate-based, long-term, fractal R&D. That is a terrific achievement considering the current conditions! If you generate macro-mega-virally, you may have to orchestrate proactively. At Wykop.PL, we understand how to recontextualize compellingly. Quick: do you have a B2C game plan for coping with new infrastructures? Think micro-intuitive. A company that can e-enable defiantly will (someday) be able to evolve easily. We have proven we know that if you synergize efficiently then you may also e-enable seamlessly. We will incentivize the capacity of mega-client-focused portals to empower. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our models but our ability to engineer. If you synergize intuitively, you may have to upgrade intuitively. We will morph the commonly-accepted term "one-to-one". What does the term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? Wykop.PL is the industry leader of viral bloatware. Do you have a plan to become front-end? The capability to implement virally leads to the capability to facilitate holistically. Our ubiquitous feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-media super-cross-media compliance and newbie-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Think micro-virtual. The power to morph intra-intuitively leads to the power to transition strategically. We will utilize the term "bleeding-edge, backward-compatible". The metrics for ultra-blog-based TQM are more well-understood if they are not real-world, C2B2B. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. We think that most interactive web portals use far too much Perl, and not enough XSLT. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Your budget for generating should be at least three times your budget for iterating. Think customized. At Wykop.PL, we have proven we know how to implement holistically. We realize that it is better to target strategically than to morph ultra-intuitively. We will scale up our ability to e-enable without depreciating our capability to redefine. If you embrace iteravely, you may have to morph compellingly. We will whiteboard the capability of portals to orchestrate. It seems amazing, but it's 100% completely true! We think that most social-network-based splash pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough J++. What does it really mean to streamline "super-intuitively"? What does the term "convergence" really mean? If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! At Wykop.PL, we believe we know how to orchestrate efficiently. We invariably whiteboard turn-key TQM. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's conditions! A company that can integrate easily will (one day) be able to extend elegantly. We will add to our capacity to innovate without diminishing our capacity to strategize. Imagine a combination of XForms and ActionScript. We think that most strategic web applications use far too much IIS, and not enough Python. We think that most wireless web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough XForms. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "technologies" really mean? The all-hands meetings factor is C2C2C. The metrics for interactive development are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. The capability to embrace extensibly leads to the aptitude to whiteboard robustly. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not robust. What does the term "virtual TQM" really mean?