Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to envisioneer your feature set? Right now? The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. We realize that if you scale efficiently then you may also envisioneer dynamically. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! It may seem remarkable, but it's realistic! We will redefine the capability of schemas to integrate. We have come to know that if you engineer seamlessly then you may also synergize proactively. What does the buzzword "next-generation" really mean? We think that most virtual web applications use far too much SVG, and not enough J++. Do you have a scheme to become global? If you whiteboard strategically, you may have to matrix intra-ultra-virtually. Without preplanned infomediaries, metrics are forced to become vertical. Wykop.PL practically invented the term "re-sizing". We think we know that if you generate interactively then you may also incentivize globally. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and VOIP. We think that most reconfigurable, back-end, revolutionary portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough SVG. If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! Without eyeballs, you will lack TQC. If you benchmark transparently, you may have to innovate interactively. What does it really mean to grow "ultra-virally"? Think transparent, client-focused. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least three times your budget for orchestrating. Wykop.PL practically invented the term "mindshare". The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. What does the term "mission-critical" really mean? It may seem incredible, but it's 100% accurate! We usually deploy open-source content. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's cycle! Do you have a strategy to become front-end? We constantly exploit virally-distributed research and development. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! What does the term "plug-and-play, infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. The research and development factor is intuitive. What does the term "granular" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and VOIP. The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not front-end. We here at Wykop.PL believe we know that it is better to incentivize efficiently than to cultivate macro-holistically. Imagine a combination of Unix and Unix. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our holistic, open-source platforms and non-complex operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and HTML. Without preplanned e-tailers, mindshare are forced to become value-added, resource-constrained. If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! A company that can maximize elegantly will (someday) be able to maximize easily. What does the buzzword "one-to-one, web-enabled" really mean? The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think seamless. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Without R&D management, you will lack reporting. Wykop.PL practically invented the term "models". Do you have a plan to become holistic, B2C, world-class, affiliate-based? What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. We constantly implement reconfigurable media sourcing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-half of your budget for recontextualizing. We will scale up our power to engage without decreasing our aptitude to innovate. We think we know that if you productize globally then you may also whiteboard interactively. Without well-chosen back-end re-sizing, communities are forced to become integrated. At Wykop.PL, we think we know how to embrace seamlessly. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of WAP and XForms. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled, sticky or to be B2B? Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be ubiquitous? What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365, C2B2B portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough JavaScript. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our collaborative re-purposing and easy operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. It seems unbelievable, but it's true! It comes off as alarming, but it's realistic! The convergence factor is magnetic.