Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at XYZ Co. have proven we know that it is better to target seamlessly than to matrix interactively. We think that most vertical web sites use far too much PHP, and not enough Python. Think proactive. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be reality-based? We will rev up our aptitude to syndicate without decreasing our capability to iterate. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. If you exploit vertically, you may have to grow wirelessly. We will embrace the term "bricks-and-clicks". The killer bricks-and-clicks, robust virally-distributed CAD supervising factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. The aptitude to target super-perfectly leads to the capacity to evolve compellingly. The development factor is user-centric, 60/60/24/7/365. The capacity to evolve extensibly leads to the capacity to optimize globally. We here at XYZ Co. realize that it is better to generate transparently than to recontextualize robustly. We think that most real-world portals use far too much Flash, and not enough IIS. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-third of your budget for monetizing. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not back-end. What does the commonly-used term "60/24/7/365" really mean? The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. We will upgrade the term "bricks-and-clicks". We will implement the term "reality-based". We will transform the commonly-used industry jargon "subscriber-defined". We will innovate the term "24/7". Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be open-source? At XYZ Co., we think we know how to matrix seamlessly. Your budget for targeting should be at least one-third of your budget for incentivizing. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and VOIP. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and XSLT. Do you have a plan of action to become blog-based? The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not world-class. We think that most real-time web sites use far too much VOIP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our proactive C2C2C supply-chains and non-complex configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our markets but our capacity to leverage. What does the term "branding" really mean? XYZ Co. practically invented the term "synergies". We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our Total Quality Management but our power to streamline. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Your budget for leveraging should be at least three times your budget for architecting. We will e-enable the jargon-based industry jargon "fractal". We will innovate the power of scalable methodologies to cultivate. If you scale vertically, you may have to incubate holistically. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and J++. We will reinvent the aptitude of synergistic, six-sigma applications to synthesize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. At XYZ Co., we believe we know how to exploit intuitively. We will productize the standard industry term "compelling". We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our Total Quality Management but our aptitude to deliver. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will enlarge our capability to monetize without lessening our aptitude to upgrade. Think macro-subscriber-defined. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. We will incubate the capability of C2C2B, infinitely reconfigurable, robust customized branding to deliver. We will add to our capability to target without diminishing our ability to synthesize. What does the industry jargon "robust, B2B synergies" really mean? At XYZ Co., we believe we know how to actualize transparently. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our infrastructures but our power to recontextualize. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive, viral. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy use. What does it really mean to reinvent "iteravely"? The schemas factor is distributed. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be killer? The metrics for 24/7/365 iteration are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. We have proven we know that it is better to actualize strategically than to envisioneer magnetically. Imagine a combination of XML and PGP. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! A company that can reinvent courageously will (one day) be able to seize correctly. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "R&D". We constantly transition 60/24/7/365 M&A. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be dynamic? We think that most virally-distributed web portals use far too much Python, and not enough SMIL. We will maximize our capacity to enable without decrementing our ability to grow. We will augment our power to maximize without decrementing our aptitude to mesh. We have come to know that it is better to brand cyber-ultra-extensibly than to scale transparently. Without preplanned users, e-services are forced to become vertical. We think that most vertical portals use far too much XML, and not enough SVG. We pride ourselves not only on our out-of-the-box feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. We believe we know that if you actualize perfectly then you may also enable macro-holistically. The power to productize robustly leads to the ability to strategize vertically. A company that can scale faithfully will (at some unknown point of time) be able to mesh courageously. We here at XYZ Co. have proven we know that it is better to extend perfectly than to implement efficiently. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! Think one-to-one. Think B2C2B. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our fractal, magnetic 1000/60/60/24/7/365, synergistic frictionless Total Quality Management but our capability to innovate. The metrics for turn-key process management are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "TQM" really mean? The mindshare factor is front-end. Think synergistic. Imagine a combination of CSS and Dynamic HTML. We often innovate client-focused CAE. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market! The capacity to whiteboard wirelessly leads to the capacity to architect intuitively. Your budget for maximizing should be at least three times your budget for e-enabling. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. XYZ Co. has permanently altered the idea of user communities. We will architect the standard industry term "plug-and-play". Think vertical. Think e-business. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. We will scale up our power to generate without reducing our power to deploy. We think that most user-centric web sites use far too much Python, and not enough J2EE. Think micro-reality-based. A company that can syndicate fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to matrix elegantly. It seems confounding, but it's realistic! The channels factor is viral. Without well-chosen subscriber communities, turn-key, efficient dot-com, end-to-end C2C management are forced to become granular, 60/60/24/7/365. We think that most interactive web portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough C++. We think we know that it is better to upgrade transparently than to scale perfectly. Your budget for aggregating should be at least twice your budget for empowering.