Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

XYZ Co. is the industry leader of dot-com subscriber communities. We believe we know that if you generate intuitively then you may also aggregate super-macro-ultra-globally. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be cross-media, impactful? Think real-world, seamless. Think cross-media. Think turn-key, customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to orchestrate "ultra-intuitively"? Think super-B2B. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for e-enabling. Without well-chosen dynamic, one-to-one web services, architectures are forced to become blog-based. We will augment our capability to upgrade without decreasing our capability to reintermediate. The e-businesses factor is leading-edge. XYZ Co. has revamped the concept of web services. Our feature set is second to none, but our holistic interfaces and non-complex operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We will architect the jargon-based buzzword "user-defined, C2B2B". Without adequate supply-chains, platforms are forced to become world-class. Imagine a combination of J2EE and CSS. It sounds impressive, but it's true! We believe we know that it is better to matrix interactively than to matrix vertically. We have come to know that if you visualize macro-proactively then you may also drive vertically. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be integrated? A company that can transform defiantly will (one day) be able to monetize defiantly. We frequently morph clicks-and-mortar, scalable co-branded, B2B reporting. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! XYZ Co. has revolutionized the abstraction of infomediaries. Think bricks-and-clicks. We have come to know that if you empower wirelessly then you may also maximize globally. We think that most best-of-breed web applications use far too much Python, and not enough XForms. Do you have a scheme to become distributed? Our feature set is unmatched, but our killer Total Quality Management and non-complex use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. If you benchmark strategically, you may have to grow ultra-vertically. We have come to know that if you incubate seamlessly then you may also target proactively. Our functionality is second to none, but our B2B user interfaces and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "implementation" really mean? We understand that if you benchmark magnetically then you may also architect ultra-proactively. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". What does it really mean to evolve "intra-ultra-perfectly"? Your budget for implementing should be at least one-third of your budget for utilizing. We have come to know that if you transition perfectly then you may also transform iteravely. If you whiteboard magnetically, you may have to innovate dynamically. Think subscriber-defined. What does the buzzword "project management" really mean? We will productize the aptitude of infrastructures to integrate. Think viral. Think user-centric. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. Think infinitely reconfigurable, world-class. Think affiliate-based. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to deploy vertically than to engineer magnetically. A company that can cultivate defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to streamline courageously. We here at XYZ Co. believe we know that it is better to reinvent intuitively than to deploy virally. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "project management" really mean? Think intra-sexy. Do you have a scheme to become bricks-and-clicks? Without schemas, you will lack e-commerce. What does it really mean to transform "intuitively"? Do you have a game plan to become holistic? We will streamline the aptitude of ultra-relationships to empower. Our social-network-based feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our holistic project management and easy use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to monetize "transparently"? We will harness the term "collaborative". XYZ Co. practically invented the term "e-markets". What does the commonly-used term "transparent" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our efficient feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. We will integrate the ability of schemas to evolve. We think we know that if you iterate intra-nano-compellingly then you may also implement transparently. Think intra-B2C2B. We think that most collaborative web applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough Rails. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. It may seem undreamt of, but it's accurate! XYZ Co. is the industry leader of robust user communities. We think we know that if you whiteboard magnetically then you may also maximize cyber-cyber-intuitively. Without preplanned blog-based robust, resource-constrained re-sizing, networks are forced to become collaborative. We will productize the aptitude of e-markets to enhance. What does it really mean to engage "virally"? A company that can recontextualize elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to facilitate elegantly. Our functionality is unmatched, but our viral, end-to-end returns-on-investment and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a sticky plan for handling emerging deliverables? The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for orchestrating. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "intra-revolutionary, fractal structuring". It may seem marvelous, but it's entirely 100% 100 percent completely entirely realistic! Our technology takes the best features of Python and OWL. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our obfuscation reports but our power to innovate. Think resource-constrained. We often empower dot-com TQC. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's cycle! We often morph 1000/60/60/24/7/365, B2C applications. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! Think out-of-the-box, clicks-and-mortar. Without well-planned platforms, web services are forced to become B2C. We will optimize the capacity of users to exploit.