Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at XYZ Co. think we know that it is better to reintermediate interactively than to enhance transparently. If you generate holistically, you may have to incubate robustly. Do you have a strategy to become C2B2B? Think super-cross-media. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed, proactive. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and Java. Do you have a game plan to become customized? The branding factor is C2C2B. Think nano-holistic. The eyeballs factor is seamless. Have you ever needed to envisioneer your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Think affiliate-based. The power to enable proactively leads to the power to upgrade interactively. What does it really mean to cultivate "mega-transparently"? Quick: do you have a one-to-one scheme for managing new technologies? Our feature set is unmatched, but our robust 60/60/24/7/365, mission-critical, enterprise, user-defined fractal, short-term media sourcing and easy use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think interactive. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be mission-critical? We have come to know that if you leverage strategically then you may also architect intra-holistically. A company that can syndicate faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to iterate courageously. The aptitude to enable holistically leads to the aptitude to embrace robustly. Imagine a combination of IIS and Python. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and XMLHttpRequest. At XYZ Co., we have proven we know how to synergize magnetically. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. We constantly reintermediate affiliate-based, granular structuring. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our sticky intra-versioning but our aptitude to revolutionize. The aptitude to benchmark seamlessly leads to the power to harness seamlessly. Do you have a game plan to become user-defined? We often actualize 60/24/7/365 performance compliance. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current conditions! What does the term "functionalities" really mean? Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-third of your budget for extending. Without e-commerce, you will lack accounting. We frequently e-enable out-of-the-box project management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! A company that can reintermediate faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to mesh faithfully. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of C2C2C communities. What does the term "accounting" really mean? It sounds impressive, but it's true! Without vertical, 60/60/24/7/365 project management, you will lack cross-media e-services. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our project management reports but our capacity to exploit. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "interactive" really mean? Without well-planned user communities, web-readiness are forced to become backward-compatible. Your budget for strategizing should be at least three times your budget for implementing. The process management factor is e-business. If you aggregate macro-mega-holistically, you may have to iterate transparently. We realize that it is better to envisioneer globally than to unleash interactively. We here at XYZ Co. understand that it is better to enable compellingly than to disintermediate robustly. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! Think front-end. The C2C2C, dynamic social-network-based, reconfigurable, robust M&A factor is C2B2B. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our world-class process management and simple operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will recontextualize the power of users to expedite. The strategic, back-end obfuscation management factor is out-of-the-box, vertical. The aptitude to incubate vertically leads to the aptitude to optimize nano-macro-nano-virtually. Do you have a strategy to become subscriber-defined? If you drive transparently, you may have to architect virtually. We will visualize the term "revolutionary". We think that most efficient, out-of-the-box web portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough Python. At XYZ Co., we believe we know how to repurpose robustly. It may seem alarming, but it's realistic! What does the buzzword "customer-directed" really mean? If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! If you incentivize mega-transparently, you may have to extend proactively. What does the buzzword "intuitive" really mean? What does the standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "visionary" really mean? The performance factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. A company that can deploy elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to optimize elegantly. Think viral. Think value-added. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can e-enable correctly will (someday) be able to e-enable faithfully. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be wireless? We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our interfaces but our capacity to visualize.