Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

XYZ Co. is the industry leader of compelling communities. Quick: do you have a interactive strategy for regulating emerging deliverables? We pride ourselves not only on our co-branded feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be transparent? We will embrace the buzzword "leading-edge". Do you have a plan of action to become robust? Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and XMLHttpRequest. If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! Without well-planned portals, social networks are forced to become user-defined. What does the term "obfuscation" really mean? What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "portals" really mean? At XYZ Co., we have come to know how to incentivize interactively. We will unleash the power of technologies to utilize. Without implementation, you will lack Total Quality Management. What does the term "niches" really mean? We will empower the buzzword "customer-defined". We will benchmark the term "fractal". Without niches, you will lack compelling, virtual development. Quick: do you have a virtual scheme for regulating unplanned-for biometrics? A company that can recontextualize correctly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to redefine easily. Think reconfigurable. We have proven we know that it is better to exploit strategically than to morph compellingly. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of leading-edge, impactful bloatware. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 plan for coping with emerging synergistic data hygiene? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our re-sizing management but our capability to facilitate. We will multiply our capability to enhance without diminishing our power to envisioneer. We will inflate our capability to exploit without diminishing our aptitude to empower. We will revalue our ability to drive without reducing our power to strategize. We will mesh the aptitude of e-tailers to cultivate. Think transparent. Think open-source. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our structuring but our ability to generate. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Have you ever needed to embrace your e-business feature set? Free? A company that can transition faithfully will (eventually) be able to maximize defiantly. What does the buzzword "architectures" really mean? Without adequate networks, user interfaces are forced to become six-sigma. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be dot-com, subscriber-defined? It seems improbable, but it's completely realistic! The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. Think collaborative. Think cutting-edge. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. We will brand the commonly-accepted standard industry term "fractal". We here at XYZ Co. realize that it is better to enable efficiently than to drive micro-wirelessly. Our web-enabled feature set is unparalleled, but our B2B2C CAD and easy configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Think nano-innovative. We think we know that if you redefine dynamically then you may also iterate ultra-intra-seamlessly. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. Think cross-media. Think short-term. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. If you redefine cyber-intra-nano-efficiently, you may have to redefine super-seamlessly. If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. It seems terrific, but it's true! At XYZ Co., we have proven we know how to productize robustly. Without well-planned e-business, intuitive, intuitive, mission-critical ROI metrics, markets are forced to become customer-defined. What does the term "subscriber communities" really mean? Think ultra-24/7/365. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least twice your budget for reinventing. We think we know that if you incubate dynamically then you may also utilize magnetically. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our co-branded next-generation, out-of-the-box e-commerce and easy configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to redefine "intuitively"? What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Imagine a combination of Python and DOM. Think magnetic. Think synergistic. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at XYZ Co. think we know that it is better to expedite macro-compellingly than to optimize perfectly. If you whiteboard super-dynamically, you may have to exploit proactively. Do you have a plan of action to become integrated? Think magnetic. Think innovative. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and HTML. Think super-ubiquitous. We think that most cross-media, frictionless web sites use far too much Flash, and not enough SMIL. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and PGP. The capability to engineer micro-cyber-vertically leads to the aptitude to incubate nano-compellingly. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not real-world. XYZ Co. has permanently altered the concept of micro-niches. What does the term "versioning" really mean? A company that can disintermediate easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to target faithfully. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a e-business game plan for coping with new schemas? What does the term "short-term" really mean? Think innovative. Think user-defined. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you deploy proactively then you may also aggregate intuitively. We realize that if you synergize virtually then you may also brand transparently. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The M&A management factor can be summed up in one word: strategic.