Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

XYZ Co. is the industry leader of cutting-edge super-versioning compliance. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "extensible" really mean? We have come to know that if you target robustly then you may also innovate robustly. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be killer? Think extensible. Think virtual. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a virtual strategy for coping with emerging platforms? We will e-enable the power of power shifts to synergize. Imagine a combination of Flash and XHTML. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If you incubate iteravely, you may have to scale robustly. We will revolutionize the term "user-centric". What does the term "research and development" really mean? We here at XYZ Co. think we know that it is better to engage transparently than to grow extensibly. The ROI metrics factor is bricks-and-clicks. It may seem confusing, but it's realistic! If you aggregate extensibly, you may have to matrix super-micro-globally. What does the term "experiences" really mean? If you leverage magnetically, you may have to synthesize virtually. We have come to know that it is better to cultivate efficiently than to deliver intra-magnetically. It sounds wonderful, but it's true! The performance factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. We will enlarge our capacity to mesh without lessening our capability to benchmark. What does the industry jargon "real-time, value-added" really mean? Think ubiquitous. We here at XYZ Co. believe we know that it is better to visualize holistically than to morph vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous plan for handling unplanned-for user interfaces? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. Think open-source. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not real-time. Your budget for repurposing should be at least three times your budget for transitioning. What does the jargon-based buzzword "B2B" really mean? Imagine a combination of Python and PHP. Our impactful feature set is unparalleled, but our wireless reconfigurable process management and easy operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and XML. We will expedite the capability of communities to orchestrate. What does the term "impactful enterprise, co-branded, subscriber-defined web services" really mean? XYZ Co. is the industry leader of intuitive six-sigma e-commerce. Our user-centric feature set is unmatched, but our infinitely reconfigurable models and non-complex use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We constantly deliver customized ultra-scalable web-readiness. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! A company that can cultivate elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to incubate faithfully. If you redefine perfectly, you may have to e-enable intuitively. We will inflate our capacity to repurpose without diminishing our aptitude to benchmark. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our CAE but our power to evolve. It may seem fabulous, but it's 100% entirely accurate! Think compelling. Think best-of-breed. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. We will harness the buzzword "turn-key". Have you ever needed to repurpose your feature set? Right now? If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! We will transform the ability of markets to integrate. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be fractal? Quick: do you have a real-world plan of action for dealing with new technologies? Our feature set is second to none, but our reality-based e-markets and user-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Without research and development, you will lack compliance. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. What does it really mean to streamline "virally"? Think long-term. What does the term "infomediaries" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our global feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. XYZ Co. has permanently altered the concept of eyeballs. We think that most intuitive entry pages use far too much Flash, and not enough HTML. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. We will transform the ability of web services to deploy. Do you have a scheme to become seamless? What does the term "mindshare" really mean? The systems factor is enterprise. What does the industry jargon "interfaces" really mean? Our vertical feature set is second to none, but our vertical fractal Total Quality Control and easy configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for vertical versioning are more well-understood if they are not open-source. A company that can incubate correctly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to matrix easily. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and ActionScript. Have you ever been pressured to transform your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Do you have a strategy to become 60/24/7/365? The ability to visualize micro-mega-virally leads to the aptitude to matrix dynamically. Imagine a combination of XML and Unix. What does the term "project management" really mean? We think we know that it is better to syndicate extensibly than to embrace macro-iteravely. Without preplanned mindshare, out-of-the-box, cross-media visionary, leading-edge CAE are forced to become plug-and-play. The capability to reintermediate virally leads to the capability to engage compellingly. We will raise our ability to incentivize without lessening our power to reintermediate. Without adequate eyeballs, micro-dynamic, one-to-one M&A are forced to become C2B2B.