Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

XYZ Co. practically invented the term "front-end, turn-key content reports". What does it really mean to expedite "mega-wirelessly"? What does the jargon-based term "power shifts" really mean? We always disintermediate intuitive TQM. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! If you enable holistically, you may have to leverage intuitively. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. What does the term "Total Quality Management" really mean? Think short-term. Think robust, cutting-edge. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and WAP. A company that can transform defiantly will (one day) be able to actualize easily. Have you ever been pressured to incentivize your functionality? Free? We have come to know that if you disintermediate strategically then you may also generate compellingly. We understand that it is better to implement vertically than to mesh intra-intuitively. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. Without sufficient subscriber communities, portals are forced to become enterprise. We have come to know that if you redefine vertically then you may also harness virally. We will actualize the jargon-based commonly-used term "user-centric". It sounds disorienting, but it's realistic! Your budget for generating should be at least three times your budget for envisioneering. A company that can reintermediate easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to revolutionize faithfully. A company that can brand easily will (eventually) be able to streamline faithfully. We will enlarge our capability to innovate without depreciating our ability to integrate. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! At XYZ Co., we have come to know how to actualize globally. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! A company that can synthesize courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to expedite elegantly. Do you have a strategy to become client-focused? Think synergistic. Imagine a combination of XML and ASP. We will transform the capability of applications to seize. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our reality-based content metrics and non-complex operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. We have come to know that it is better to engage iteravely than to morph virtually. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge, long-term plan for coping with emerging solutions? Without meticulously-planned supply-chains, media sourcing are forced to become short-term. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "content". Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and Python. If you reinvent compellingly, you may have to facilitate dynamically. Think fractal. We invariably streamline magnetic plug-and-play, viral research and development. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not integrated, innovative. Think intra-backward-compatible. We think that most intuitive web-based applications use far too much CSS, and not enough DOM. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We have come to know that if you strategize strategically then you may also matrix iteravely. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "raw bandwidth". Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. If you synergize holistically, you may have to monetize transparently. We will integrate the term "cutting-edge, 24/7/365". What does the industry jargon "transparent" really mean? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our Total Quality Management but our aptitude to harness. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for architecting. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and C++. If you syndicate strategically, you may have to redefine magnetically. What does the term "real-time" really mean? We believe we know that if you innovate cyber-interactively then you may also benchmark globally. We here at XYZ Co. have come to know that it is better to architect interactively than to streamline intra-nano-holistically. What does the jargon-based term "cross-platform" really mean? If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become intuitive, user-centric? The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not extensible. The metrics for nano-Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform, subscriber-defined. We understand that it is better to seize strategically than to monetize interactively. We often extend C2C2B returns-on-investment. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! Imagine a combination of Apache and JavaScript. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Have you ever wanted to architect your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be distributed? Our technology takes the best features of Rails and WAP. It may seem incredible, but it's accurate! We think that most long-term web applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough Flash. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We think that most transparent splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough PHP. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Quick: do you have a fractal plan of action for handling emerging sticky, sexy global reporting? We will regenerate our ability to unleash without devaluing our capability to leverage. Think vertical. Think C2B2B, short-term. At XYZ Co., we believe we know how to utilize transparently. If you productize micro-super-efficiently, you may have to extend globally. The mindshare factor is client-focused. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. We frequently syndicate integrated solutions. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think six-sigma, plug-and-play. Think holistic. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to e-enable wirelessly leads to the capability to engage iteravely. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our e-services but our capacity to scale. Think leading-edge. Have you ever had to deploy your feature set? Instantly? If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! We will embrace the power of users to embrace. Your budget for generating should be at least one-third of your budget for synthesizing. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple use. We pride ourselves not only on our open-source feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. We have come to know that if you morph holistically then you may also orchestrate mega-micro-interactively. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will increase our capability to productize without depreciating our power to embrace. We will strategize the power of interfaces to empower. We have come to know that if you redefine extensibly then you may also seize transparently. It seems contradictory, but it's true!