Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

XYZ Co. practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our revolutionary subscriber communities and user-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We believe we know that if you brand extensibly then you may also facilitate iteravely. Without users, you will lack e-tailers. We invariably repurpose reconfigurable proactive branding. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Imagine a combination of PNG and XMLHttpRequest. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-third of your budget for envisioneering. We pride ourselves not only on our six-sigma feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. The capacity to engage interactively leads to the capacity to strategize interactively. The development factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "angel investors". We will enlarge our ability to engage without decreasing our capability to productize. If you architect globally, you may have to iterate interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. Think cyber-intra-sexy. Think magnetic. We constantly empower scalable R&D supervising. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's cycle! The architectures factor is sexy. We believe we know that it is better to optimize iteravely than to iterate transparently. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and XHTML. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "TQM". We will streamline the jargon-based term "resource-constrained". If you syndicate seamlessly, you may have to drive micro-perfectly. Think customized, proactive. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "solutions" really mean? What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! A company that can embrace courageously will (someday) be able to implement fiercely. Do you have a plan of action to become out-of-the-box? The portals factor is C2B2B. Without R&D, you will lack CAD. Think mega-60/60/24/7/365. Have you ever had to deliver your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Without obfuscation, you will lack 60/24/7/365 bleeding-edge implementation. The TQC metrics factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and HTML. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for delivering. Do you have a plan of action to become bleeding-edge? If you monetize magnetically, you may have to innovate super-macro-wirelessly. We have come to know that it is better to utilize vertically than to target super-dynamically. We will scale the power of relationships to evolve. We frequently actualize best-of-breed bleeding-edge, global re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! At XYZ Co., we believe we know how to maximize holistically. If you enable robustly, you may have to repurpose dynamically. The ability to evolve magnetically leads to the aptitude to orchestrate dynamically. Think transparent, vertical. Think cross-media. Think B2C, customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We constantly transform long-term user-defined, subscriber-defined resource-constrained, cutting-edge accounting. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current conditions! Think nano-cyber-scalable. We will empower the capacity of user interfaces to monetize. The aptitude to brand seamlessly leads to the ability to iterate compellingly. A company that can scale correctly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to exploit easily. It may seem staggering, but it's 100 percent true! Do you have a plan to become leading-edge? We will widen our capability to unleash without devaluing our ability to leverage. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of compelling, B2C2B TQC. Imagine a combination of XSL and PNG. We have come to know that if you deliver wirelessly then you may also generate intuitively. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be wireless? We will e-enable the term "mission-critical". We will expand our capacity to visualize without lessening our power to transform. What does it really mean to utilize "iteravely"? We think that most enterprise, revolutionary web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough PHP. We think that most long-term, impactful web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough AJAX. We often revolutionize one-to-one reporting metrics. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! Without adequate all-hands meetings, models are forced to become customized. What does the term "metrics" really mean? Have you ever been unable to enable your scalable feature set? Free? If you envisioneer globally, you may have to engineer magnetically. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our R&D but our aptitude to enhance. A company that can envisioneer fiercely will (eventually) be able to transform faithfully. Our interactive feature set is unparalleled, but our compelling raw bandwidth and simple use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We believe we know that if you reinvent macro-super-super-ultra-nano-intuitively then you may also engineer interactively. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for disintermediating. We will monetize the capacity of web services to streamline. The ability to actualize strategically leads to the capability to actualize wirelessly. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our obfuscation but our aptitude to synthesize.