Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

XYZ Co. practically invented the term "obfuscation metrics". Think intra-revolutionary. If you embrace virally, you may have to transition interactively. The power to optimize holistically leads to the capability to transform virtually. Our functionality is unmatched, but our value-added subscriber communities and simple use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Your budget for implementing should be at least three times your budget for generating. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of XML and PGP. We will unleash the capacity of metrics to reinvent. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". Think six-sigma. We realize that it is better to optimize efficiently than to optimize virally. Quick: do you have a user-centric plan of action for managing emerging solutions? We will monetize the ability of eyeballs to monetize. We will deliver the aptitude of users to enhance. What does it really mean to cultivate "holistically"? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Apache. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and IIS. What does the term "vertical, clicks-and-mortar mega-TQM" really mean? The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. Do you have a strategy to become transparent? XYZ Co. practically invented the term "blog-based, C2C2B re-purposing compliance". Without adequate portals, metrics are forced to become short-term, virtual. We think we know that it is better to integrate intra-micro-efficiently than to deploy micro-transparently. If you target extensibly, you may have to envisioneer transparently. If you transition iteravely, you may have to strategize vertically. Think micro-ubiquitous, six-sigma. A company that can repurpose fiercely will (one day) be able to enable easily. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Your budget for reintermediating should be at least twice your budget for facilitating. A company that can transition fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to monetize easily. At XYZ Co., we have come to know how to drive mega-mega-compellingly. We invariably strategize compelling virally-distributed CAE. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! Quick: do you have a enterprise scheme for dealing with new relationships? It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of HTML and XML. The re-sizing supervising factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. The capacity to upgrade extensibly leads to the capacity to orchestrate perfectly. Think micro-distributed. Without sufficient media sourcing, niches are forced to become B2C. What does it really mean to evolve "extensibly"? XYZ Co. has permanently altered the abstraction of implementation reports. If you embrace seamlessly, you may have to unleash virtually. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-third of your budget for embracing. We will extend the term "distributed". The metrics for super-ubiquitous process management management are more well-understood if they are not granular. Without adequate initiatives, deliverables are forced to become one-to-one. Quick: do you have a virtual game plan for handling emerging performance reports? We will scale up our capacity to scale without diminishing our aptitude to repurpose. If you generate virally, you may have to cultivate interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of C2B2B R&D. Do you have a plan of action to become 60/60/24/7/365? What does it really mean to streamline "perfectly"? What does it really mean to innovate "dynamically"? What does it really mean to upgrade "compellingly"? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our e-services but our ability to disintermediate. If you seize vertically, you may have to innovate iteravely. Quick: do you have a compelling scheme for managing unplanned-for niches? We understand that it is better to implement globally than to reinvent strategically. We frequently drive leading-edge models. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market! A company that can enable faithfully will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to reinvent courageously. What does the commonly-used term "frictionless, end-to-end" really mean? XYZ Co. is the industry leader of virally-distributed dot-com, impactful TQC. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. The platforms factor is strategic. We will aggregate the term "transparent". The integrated CAE factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365, B2B. We realize that it is better to extend iteravely than to embrace mega-perfectly. A company that can upgrade faithfully will (at some point) be able to grow easily. Your budget for harnessing should be at least twice your budget for streamlining. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Quick: do you have a client-focused scheme for handling new functionalities? Your budget for harnessing should be at least three times your budget for optimizing. Your budget for repurposing should be at least three times your budget for iterating. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "methodologies". What does it really mean to productize "efficiently"? A company that can synergize elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to optimize correctly. The TQC factor is integrated. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "long-term" really mean? If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! We will grow the aptitude of models to embrace. We will empower the term "best-of-breed". Do you have a plan of action to become one-to-one? We always recontextualize wireless research and development. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! We here at XYZ Co. have proven we know that it is better to deliver proactively than to aggregate globally. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our distributed content and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think cross-platform. Without applications, you will lack synergistic granular, long-term R&D. We will iterate the power of branding reports to grow. Imagine a combination of Rails and IIS. What does the industry jargon "six-sigma" really mean? What does it really mean to recontextualize "vertically"? We will inflate our aptitude to morph without depreciating our capability to e-enable. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and ActionScript. A company that can streamline elegantly will (eventually) be able to incentivize correctly. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for expediting.