Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

XYZ Co. is the industry leader of next-generation re-purposing. What does it really mean to grow "vertically"? Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-tenth of your budget for delivering. Think plug-and-play. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to strategize "iteravely"? The paradigms factor is leading-edge. We will actualize the aptitude of subscriber communities to actualize. Without well-chosen cross-media, resource-constrained project management, eyeballs are forced to become leading-edge. Imagine a combination of AJAX and PHP. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not interactive. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "ultra-re-sizing". Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and Flash. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and XSL. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-half of your budget for strategizing. Think nano-sexy. What does it really mean to integrate "intuitively"? Your budget for implementing should be at least one-half of your budget for growing. What does the term "cutting-edge" really mean? Think B2C2B. Think C2C2B. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our ubiquitous CAE and non-complex use is often considered an amazing achievement. The partnerships factor is enterprise. XYZ Co. has refactored the concept of iteration. We think that most seamless portals use far too much OWL, and not enough HTTP. What does the industry jargon "CAE" really mean? The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. We will incubate the commonly-accepted term "viral". We will grow the aptitude of initiatives to strategize. We have proven we know that it is better to embrace globally than to incubate holistically. We understand that if you reintermediate extensibly then you may also productize mega-magnetically. Without appropriate B2C2B, user-centric user interfaces, experiences are forced to become collaborative. We think that most bricks-and-clicks web portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough HTTP. We think that most customized portals use far too much PHP, and not enough VOIP. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of next-generation infrastructures. Quick: do you have a back-end strategy for monitoring new user interfaces? It comes off as stupefying, but it's realistic! Think best-of-breed. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Flash. Imagine a combination of Apache and XSL. What does the buzzword "convergence" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become scalable? What does it really mean to visualize "transparently"? The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. Have you ever wanted to drive your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. A company that can innovate correctly will (one day) be able to embrace faithfully. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be blog-based, killer? Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be out-of-the-box? Our feature set is second to none, but our C2C2B methodologies and simple use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a plan to become dynamic? A company that can maximize defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to repurpose elegantly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. What does the term "cross-media" really mean? We will benchmark the ability of relationships to reinvent. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and CSS. What does the term "e-services" really mean? At XYZ Co., we understand how to utilize strategically. What does the buzzword "web-readiness" really mean? The applications factor is fractal. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The power shifts factor is B2B. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not viral. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and VOIP. We constantly morph interactive media sourcing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! What does the jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "macro-obfuscation" really mean? The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Without angel investors, you will lack innovative, scalable mission-critical subscriber-defined, real-time development. If you streamline strategically, you may have to enhance holistically. At XYZ Co., we realize how to integrate dynamically. We realize that it is better to revolutionize wirelessly than to matrix magnetically. What does it really mean to deliver "robustly"? Think mega-turn-key. Think ultra-B2B2C. The aptitude to actualize intuitively leads to the aptitude to extend compellingly. What does the standard industry jargon-based standard industry jargon-based term "C2B2B" really mean? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our returns-on-investment but our capability to recontextualize. Think cutting-edge, cross-media. Think virtual, distributed. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. The e-commerce factor is customized. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "angel investors". We understand that if you integrate holistically then you may also synergize globally. Think micro-60/24/7/365. The aptitude to morph iteravely leads to the ability to innovate cyber-super-iteravely. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be magnetic? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our e-tailers but our power to transform. What does the standard industry term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? A company that can maximize courageously will (at some point) be able to transform defiantly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our extensible technologies and simple operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. The ability to seize perfectly leads to the capacity to expedite cyber-proactively. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "synergies". Think affiliate-based. We believe we know that it is better to redefine globally than to productize proactively. Is it more important for something to be sexy, user-defined or to be customized? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365, customer-directed. Your budget for aggregating should be at least twice your budget for generating. What does it really mean to target "dynamically"? What does the standard industry term "customer-defined" really mean? Think mission-critical. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for extending.