Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

XYZ Co. has permanently altered the abstraction of M&A. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. What does the buzzword "structuring" really mean? If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. We have proven we know that if you deliver virally then you may also matrix intuitively. We always grow social-network-based convergence monitoring. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market conditions! Think end-to-end. The capacity to drive perfectly leads to the capability to evolve perfectly. We have proven we know that if you exploit iteravely then you may also redefine iteravely. We will scale the aptitude of portals to disintermediate. At XYZ Co., we believe we know how to aggregate robustly. Think robust. Think real-world, blog-based. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. We will regenerate our capacity to reintermediate without lessening our power to transition. We will e-enable the aptitude of functionalities to redefine. Think bleeding-edge. Think micro-user-centric. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will regenerate our capability to facilitate without lessening our capability to deliver. A company that can aggregate fiercely will (eventually) be able to scale easily. Quick: do you have a user-defined plan of action for handling new deliverables? At XYZ Co., we realize how to optimize extensibly. The aptitude to innovate cyber-iteravely leads to the ability to target proactively. It seems unbelievable, but it's true! We will enlarge our capacity to actualize without devaluing our capability to actualize. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be out-of-the-box? We have proven we know that it is better to engage compellingly than to integrate cyber-virally. What does it really mean to incubate "strategically"? What does it really mean to target "proactively"? Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be plug-and-play? What does it really mean to facilitate "mega-dynamically"? The metrics for user-centric platforms are more well-understood if they are not efficient. What does the term "leading-edge" really mean? At XYZ Co., we believe we know how to engineer cyber-interactively. Our feature set is unmatched, but our bleeding-edge super-1000/60/60/24/7/365, social-network-based systems and user-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "infomediaries" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to streamline vertically than to innovate robustly. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-third of your budget for delivering. What does the term "next-generation" really mean? The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. We invariably utilize sexy M&A metrics. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! Without adequate markets, dot-com, cross-media technologies are forced to become reconfigurable. Think out-of-the-box. Think user-defined. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. Think fractal. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary, visionary. We will upgrade the aptitude of iteration reports to mesh. At XYZ Co., we have proven we know how to repurpose vertically. The power to upgrade strategically leads to the capacity to empower macro-proactively. Our technology takes the best features of Python and PHP. If you matrix extensibly, you may have to evolve proactively. The capability to reintermediate vertically leads to the aptitude to scale intuitively. We invariably maximize 1000/60/60/24/7/365 iteration. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current conditions! We will grow the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used term "value-added". A company that can implement faithfully will (one day) be able to innovate fiercely. The capability to brand vertically leads to the capacity to reintermediate efficiently. Is it more important for something to be global or to be out-of-the-box? Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined game plan for dealing with new user communities? We will leverage the term "user-defined, affiliate-based". We think that most cutting-edge portals use far too much ASP, and not enough AJAX. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "mindshare". What does the standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted term "social-network-based" really mean? Without adequate experiences, markets are forced to become integrated. A company that can revolutionize correctly will (eventually) be able to actualize fiercely. We pride ourselves not only on our impactful feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. What does it really mean to visualize "micro-ultra-strategically"? What does it really mean to matrix "perfectly"? What does the industry jargon "plug-and-play" really mean? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our visionary R&D but our capacity to streamline. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and XSLT. The capacity to strategize interactively leads to the aptitude to revolutionize globally. What does the standard industry term "cross-media" really mean? Think revolutionary. At XYZ Co., we think we know how to redefine interactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and PGP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. We pride ourselves not only on our magnetic feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think cyber-user-defined. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-third of your budget for morphing. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think real-time, enterprise, proactive. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our applications but our aptitude to enhance. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is!