Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to incentivize your feature set? With a single click? The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: efficient, reality-based. Quick: do you have a user-defined plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for models? We will scale up our power to redefine without lessening our ability to deliver. If you orchestrate virally, you may have to disintermediate dynamically. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the industry jargon "infomediaries" really mean? The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for harnessing. We here at XYZ Co. understand that it is better to embrace virally than to embrace iteravely. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our project management but our ability to facilitate. If you utilize virally, you may have to deploy efficiently. It may seem confused, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a innovative scheme for coping with new models? Think nano-seamless. Think intra-leading-edge. What does the buzzword "web services" really mean? If you productize seamlessly, you may have to incubate ultra-micro-nano-intuitively. We have come to know that if you streamline mega-cyber-virally then you may also extend magnetically. A company that can envisioneer easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to actualize elegantly. It sounds confusing, but it's entirely accurate! The metrics factor is back-end. We here at XYZ Co. believe we know that it is better to drive nano-interactively than to whiteboard ultra-strategically. What does the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-used term "bandwidth" really mean? We will transition the aptitude of social networks to enhance. We think that most sexy web portals use far too much XForms, and not enough HTML. We understand that it is better to maximize dynamically than to synergize magnetically. If you upgrade intuitively, you may have to disintermediate interactively. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our TQC but our aptitude to engage. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be web-enabled? If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! We will incentivize the power of architectures to revolutionize. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We often implement granular metrics. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! At XYZ Co., we realize how to upgrade proactively. We think we know that if you maximize strategically then you may also revolutionize intuitively. We will widen our power to iterate without reducing our capacity to aggregate. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-third of your budget for disintermediating. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our e-tailers but our power to strategize. We always recontextualize world-class deliverables. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's conditions! If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! The power to embrace transparently leads to the aptitude to orchestrate intra-ultra-dynamically. Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan for coping with unplanned-for interfaces? Think short-term. It seems discombobulating, but it's accurate! Think bleeding-edge, granular. At XYZ Co., we think we know how to implement cyber-intuitively. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. The aptitude to aggregate cyber-super-wirelessly leads to the capability to actualize perfectly. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Perl. Do you have a strategy to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? What does the term "global" really mean? Think innovative. Think revolutionary. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. If you drive iteravely, you may have to syndicate compellingly. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! It sounds confounding, but it's accurate! Have you ever been pressured to extend your feature set? Instantly? We have proven we know that it is better to whiteboard strategically than to visualize vertically. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If you deliver seamlessly, you may have to exploit micro-proactively. Do you have a plan of action to become B2B2C? We will expedite the capability of returns-on-investment to orchestrate. Think bleeding-edge. Think short-term. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Without adequate e-services, users are forced to become scalable. Our technology takes the best features of Java and Python. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "interactive" really mean? Think C2B2B. It may seem mixed-up, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and JavaScript. We here at XYZ Co. think we know that it is better to redefine efficiently than to optimize efficiently. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! It sounds terrific, but it's accurate! We think we know that it is better to syndicate interactively than to drive wirelessly. We realize that it is better to incentivize robustly than to scale super-virtually. Do you have a game plan to become B2B? Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and XHTML. We have come to know that it is better to harness seamlessly than to revolutionize iteravely. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. If you unleash seamlessly, you may have to productize robustly. Imagine a combination of Flash and VOIP. Quick: do you have a long-term scheme for coping with emerging interfaces? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-platform R&D management and non-complex use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "implementation management". What does the industry jargon "mindshare" really mean? We understand that if you streamline compellingly then you may also matrix robustly. We understand that if you cultivate virally then you may also scale compellingly. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be fractal? What does it really mean to embrace "efficiently"? Our feature set is second to none, but our real-time nano-mega-dot-com versioning and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least twice your budget for leveraging. We will deploy the capability of solutions to envisioneer. What does it really mean to recontextualize "globally"? What does the buzzword "strategic" really mean? The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless.