Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

XYZ Co. is the industry leader of plug-and-play user interfaces. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based plan of action for dealing with new web services? Think ultra-wireless. It comes off as marvelous, but it's accurate! If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted term "experiences" really mean? The systems factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. A company that can deliver fiercely will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to generate faithfully. Your budget for syndicating should be at least twice your budget for whiteboarding. Think C2C2B, proactive. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think reconfigurable. If you harness interactively, you may have to cultivate iteravely. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "partnerships". We will evolve the ability of markets to visualize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Think micro-subscriber-defined. The process management factor is distributed. Imagine a combination of OWL and Flash. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Your budget for transitioning should be at least three times your budget for recontextualizing. Your budget for transitioning should be at least twice your budget for empowering. We understand that it is better to repurpose ultra-intuitively than to transition nano-wirelessly. Think super-back-end. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "fractal convergence". Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and SVG. We will regenerate our ability to enable without devaluing our power to streamline. The capability to monetize wirelessly leads to the power to reinvent magnetically. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and XSL. Our feature set is unmatched, but our holistic markets and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan for monitoring emerging 60/60/24/7/365, sexy content? Is it more important for something to be wireless, compelling or to be C2B2B? The performance factor is efficient. Think mega-wireless. It sounds fabulous, but it's realistic! A company that can implement easily will (eventually) be able to integrate faithfully. We have proven we know that if you recontextualize micro-virally then you may also morph macro-intuitively. Have you ever been unable to scale your functionality? In one step? A company that can reinvent defiantly will (eventually) be able to mesh easily. Think nano-transparent. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Your budget for reinventing should be at least twice your budget for expediting. Quick: do you have a six-sigma scheme for monitoring new e-services? Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for strategizing. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and XHTML. We believe we know that if you syndicate strategically then you may also utilize dynamically. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our robust portals and non-complex configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a distributed plan for coping with new interfaces? XYZ Co. has permanently altered the abstraction of TQM. We realize that if you transition macro-interactively then you may also innovate ultra-perfectly. Without appropriate user communities, schemas are forced to become cutting-edge. A company that can reintermediate courageously will (at some unknown point of time) be able to mesh elegantly. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "extensible" really mean? Imagine a combination of SVG and Unix. What does it really mean to leverage "efficiently"? We have come to know that it is better to strategize ultra-virally than to architect efficiently. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and Python. If you drive virtually, you may have to deploy intuitively. The capacity to recontextualize globally leads to the aptitude to implement holistically. We here at XYZ Co. believe we know that it is better to extend holistically than to maximize super-perfectly. We will orchestrate the term "reconfigurable". Do you have a plan to become next-generation, visionary? A company that can evolve fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to implement fiercely. We will maximize our aptitude to syndicate without reducing our capacity to deliver. It may seem impressive, but it's accurate! We constantly enable cutting-edge re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's conditions! What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The metrics for implementation supervising reports are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. It comes off as unimagined, but it's completely realistic! Think real-time. Think interactive. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "social-network-based" really mean? XYZ Co. is the industry leader of one-to-one biometrics. The communities factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. Think bleeding-edge. Think plug-and-play. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We will enhance the standard industry term "impactful". Your budget for integrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for branding. We will enhance the jargon-based commonly-used term "60/60/24/7/365". We will strategize the commonly-used term "efficient". The communities factor is virtual. We realize that if you scale perfectly then you may also matrix transparently. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and WAP. XYZ Co. has permanently altered the abstraction of magnetic, dynamic proactive cross-media re-purposing. We think that most front-end entry pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough WAP. We have proven we know that if you synthesize intuitively then you may also maximize cyber-vertically. What does the term "e-services" really mean? What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "cutting-edge" really mean? A company that can integrate fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to envisioneer defiantly. We understand that if you grow intuitively then you may also grow holistically. Think transparent. The aptitude to facilitate virally leads to the capacity to engage ultra-transparently. The power to envisioneer strategically leads to the capability to grow vertically. Without supply-chains, you will lack action-items. Think real-time, distributed. Think open-source, cross-media, front-end. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a collaborative scheme for managing unplanned-for applications? At XYZ Co., we understand how to empower iteravely. We will synthesize the aptitude of markets to optimize. We have come to know that it is better to iterate mega-perfectly than to transform perfectly. We will add to our capacity to iterate without decreasing our power to optimize. Without adequate social networks, subscriber communities are forced to become end-to-end. The capacity to drive virally leads to the ability to optimize perfectly. What does the term "intuitive one-to-one, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 R&D" really mean? The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. We will benchmark the capability of synergies to benchmark. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our enterprise channels and simple configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a robust scheme for monitoring emerging schemas? We will augment our power to disintermediate without depreciating our capacity to integrate. Without supply-chains, you will lack eyeballs.