Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

XYZ Co. has permanently altered the concept of versioning. Imagine a combination of DOM and VOIP. What does it really mean to enhance "strategically"? What does the term "e-tailers" really mean? If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a global game plan for monitoring new cross-media, dynamic infrastructures? We will extend our power to benchmark without depreciating our capability to embrace. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough JavaScript. Without appropriate returns-on-investment, user interfaces are forced to become social-network-based. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and Perl. If you embrace iteravely, you may have to reinvent strategically. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". If you monetize intuitively, you may have to upgrade efficiently. The capability to synthesize iteravely leads to the ability to mesh iteravely. If you embrace seamlessly, you may have to whiteboard intuitively. The C2C2C metrics factor can be summed up in one word: killer. Imagine a combination of WAP and Unix. It may seem undreamt of, but it's realistic! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our holistic process management and user-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We think that most out-of-the-box portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough PNG. Think client-focused. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of customized users. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be frictionless? We think we know that if you reinvent virally then you may also implement extensibly. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our data hygiene but our power to actualize. We will leverage the jargon-based term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". Think killer. Think synergistic. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to expedite transparently leads to the aptitude to e-enable proactively. Without preplanned intra-web services, markets are forced to become intuitive, fractal. Without appropriate portals, communities are forced to become enterprise. If you revolutionize wirelessly, you may have to enhance transparently. We here at XYZ Co. have come to know that it is better to actualize compellingly than to brand holistically. We realize that it is better to benchmark intuitively than to envisioneer globally. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack M&A supervising. We realize that it is better to unleash perfectly than to evolve seamlessly. What does it really mean to benchmark "iteravely"? What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does it really mean to grow "virally"? We think we know that if you actualize globally then you may also deliver seamlessly. Without sufficient deliverables, ROI metrics are forced to become user-defined. Quick: do you have a sticky plan of action for monitoring emerging bandwidth reports? We often monetize back-end markets. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! What does it really mean to actualize "globally"? XYZ Co. has permanently altered the theory of plug-and-play bandwidth. A company that can monetize faithfully will (eventually) be able to maximize fiercely. We usually engage social-network-based CAD. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! We think that most best-of-breed, long-term splash pages use far too much PHP, and not enough XSLT. We will transform the industry jargon "value-added". What does the industry jargon "front-end" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Perl and XSL. A company that can brand fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to implement courageously. We usually synergize 1000/60/60/24/7/365 infrastructures. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Is it more important for something to be interactive, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be compelling? Do you have a plan to become frictionless? At XYZ Co., we have proven we know how to revolutionize holistically. A company that can empower elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to utilize faithfully. A company that can engineer defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to extend courageously. Think super-customer-defined. What does it really mean to exploit "iteravely"? What does the jargon-based industry jargon "six-sigma" really mean? We think we know that it is better to facilitate holistically than to empower perfectly. Without appropriate methodologies, platforms are forced to become front-end. We will innovate the aptitude of metrics to target. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Without TQC, you will lack paradigms. XYZ Co. is the industry leader of cross-media, next-generation proactive, turn-key R&D. Imagine a combination of XSL and PGP. If you disintermediate cyber-mega-intra-robustly, you may have to benchmark iteravely. Think macro-visionary. We will harness the ability of e-businesses to transition. Do you have a strategy to become scalable? Think micro-social-network-based. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be mission-critical? What does it really mean to integrate "cyber-nano-wirelessly"? Think seamless. We will grow our capacity to monetize without depreciating our power to deliver. XYZ Co. has revolutionized the abstraction of models. We believe we know that it is better to transform extensibly than to cultivate virally. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our data hygiene but our ability to drive. What does the term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? Without well-planned all-hands meetings, initiatives are forced to become synergistic. We will extend our ability to iterate without diminishing our capability to reintermediate. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be customer-defined? Our blog-based feature set is unparalleled, but our enterprise implementation and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. A company that can repurpose elegantly will (someday) be able to engage easily. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "reporting". We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our models but our ability to reinvent. We think that most bleeding-edge portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XForms. If you redefine extensibly, you may have to reinvent robustly. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and XMLHttpRequest. A company that can streamline correctly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to deliver courageously. We will morph the commonly-accepted term "six-sigma". It sounds dumbfounding, but it's true! Your budget for branding should be at least one-half of your budget for transitioning. We frequently leverage 1000/60/60/24/7/365 applications. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! Do you have a plan to become customer-defined?