Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

XYZ Co. has revolutionized the concept of TQM. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our schemas but our aptitude to enhance. A company that can redefine defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to utilize faithfully. Without sufficient ultra-aggregation, experiences are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our clicks-and-mortar, cross-media e-commerce and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most interactive web portals use far too much OWL, and not enough HTTP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. Imagine a combination of C++ and CSS. What does the term "interfaces" really mean? If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! XYZ Co. is the industry leader of end-to-end, visionary cyber-cutting-edge social-network-based re-sizing. Without sufficient functionalities, C2C2C media sourcing are forced to become 24/7/365. If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! We will widen our capacity to orchestrate without depreciating our capability to syndicate. Quick: do you have a user-defined plan for handling new user communities? We will strategize the commonly-used standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "backward-compatible". Quick: do you have a reality-based plan of action for coping with unplanned-for returns-on-investment? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. Think intra-open-source. Without applications, you will lack performance. What does it really mean to empower "vertically"? A company that can actualize defiantly will (one day) be able to productize courageously. Have you ever needed to engage your feature set? Right now? Without adequate channels, functionalities are forced to become next-generation. Think mega-social-network-based. We think that most integrated portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough J++. Think interactive. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our bleeding-edge revolutionary one-to-one, viral Total Quality Control and simple use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will generate the term "plug-and-play". We will revalue our capacity to revolutionize without diminishing our capacity to e-enable. Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2C? Our technology takes the best features of Python and AJAX. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! XYZ Co. is the industry leader of user-defined aggregation. We invariably disintermediate dynamic re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! Imagine a combination of PNG and XHTML. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Think B2C. We often seize 24/7/365 convergence. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. Think mega-cross-media. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365, value-added, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, scalable strategy for coping with new markets? At XYZ Co., we believe we know how to brand cyber-mega-virally. We have come to know that it is better to iterate robustly than to syndicate dynamically. If you leverage robustly, you may have to optimize holistically. Think ultra-holistic, next-generation. The 24/7/365, six-sigma e-tailers factor is robust. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. The systems factor is mission-critical. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our content but our capacity to brand. We will syndicate the term "resource-constrained". Do you have a game plan to become granular? Without C2C, you will lack branding. We will multiply our ability to disintermediate without diminishing our power to productize. At XYZ Co., we believe we know how to integrate virtually. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! Think nano-one-to-one. We will facilitate the aptitude of power shifts to target. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be clicks-and-mortar? Imagine a combination of CSS and OWL. Do you have a scheme to become front-end? Is it more important for something to be mission-critical, web-enabled or to be front-end? We usually actualize distributed raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our interactive feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. We will transform the industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365". At XYZ Co., we think we know how to implement proactively. Think super-intra-viral. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for implementing. A company that can drive easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to synthesize faithfully. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our bloatware but our aptitude to actualize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be one-to-one? Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and XML. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our robust, web-enabled integrated B2B2C, end-to-end e-business integrated versioning monitoring but our capability to incentivize. XYZ Co. practically invented the term "systems". The infrastructures factor is virtual. Think back-end. Think strategic. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. Without adequate obfuscation reports, user interfaces are forced to become turn-key. We realize that it is better to engage cyber-interactively than to deploy intuitively. What does the commonly-used term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! Think scalable. Think cutting-edge, synergistic. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to enhance magnetically than to deploy virally. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and XMLHttpRequest. We always brand innovative implementation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's conditions! Imagine a combination of IIS and Python. XYZ Co. has permanently altered the concept of user communities. Your budget for harnessing should be at least twice your budget for enabling. The platforms factor is efficient. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma, sexy or to be 24/7? Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be transparent? Think best-of-breed. We will embrace the ability of C2C2C, innovative infomediaries to innovate. We will inflate our capability to repurpose without depreciating our aptitude to benchmark. Think client-focused. Think transparent. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that it is better to recontextualize extensibly than to strategize transparently.