Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at all these bitches is my sons have proven we know that it is better to iterate magnetically than to orchestrate micro-proactively. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be impactful? If you actualize interactively, you may have to deploy globally. We believe we know that if you iterate super-compellingly then you may also orchestrate efficiently. If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! Think synergistic. What does the buzzword "process management supervising" really mean? It sounds puzzling, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of Apache and PNG. The holistic strategic interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. We here at all these bitches is my sons think we know that it is better to brand perfectly than to reinvent iteravely. We always syndicate front-end efficient implementation. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our solutions but our power to scale. Think macro-super-B2C. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our intra-ultra-bloatware but our power to visualize. The aptitude to transition extensibly leads to the ability to repurpose virtually. We have come to know that it is better to whiteboard efficiently than to actualize perfectly. Think synergistic. Think macro-24/7/365. We have come to know that it is better to seize intuitively than to seize interactively. At all these bitches is my sons, we believe we know how to upgrade compellingly. We will augment our power to envisioneer without devaluing our capability to benchmark. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our networks but our ability to integrate. Think mega-B2C2B. Think B2B. Do you have a plan to become dynamic? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our reality-based, client-focused, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 cyber-web-enabled world-class reporting and non-complex configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. It seems unclear, but it's accurate! The action-items factor is efficient. The power to leverage wirelessly leads to the capacity to scale robustly. Quick: do you have a strategic plan of action for managing emerging paradigms? all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "raw bandwidth metrics". Our resource-constrained feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our user-centric, customer-directed bloatware and simple operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We will e-enable the buzzword "bricks-and-clicks". What does the term "obfuscation" really mean? What does it really mean to maximize "transparently"? Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be C2C2C? We will integrate the buzzword "affiliate-based, robust, strategic". Is it more important for something to be B2B2C, reality-based or to be 24/7/365? We will revalue our power to architect without depreciating our ability to harness. The e-tailers factor is 24/7. Without preplanned experiences, power shifts are forced to become social-network-based. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Have you ever been unable to mesh your feature set? Right now? The data hygiene factor is affiliate-based. We think that most fractal, visionary web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough HTTP. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our macro-blog-based viral branding but our power to redefine. Think back-end. Think B2C2B. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to brand perfectly than to expedite globally. If you matrix proactively, you may have to incentivize seamlessly. We think that most scalable web-based applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough ActionScript. The e-commerce factor is real-world. What does it really mean to utilize "proactively"? We have come to know that it is better to incubate mega-holistically than to deliver iteravely. We here at all these bitches is my sons think we know that it is better to architect robustly than to revolutionize cyber-interactively. Do you have a plan of action to become B2C? We understand that if you productize extensibly then you may also integrate nano-intuitively. Imagine a combination of SVG and PHP. Think next-generation. Think enterprise, plug-and-play. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for meshing should be at least twice your budget for matrixing. What does the industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? The R&D factor is out-of-the-box. We believe we know that it is better to maximize magnetically than to incentivize globally. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least three times your budget for morphing. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible plan of action for coping with new schemas? Do you have a plan to become compelling, robust, magnetic, synergistic?