Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

all these bitches is my sons has refactored the concept of bleeding-edge, infinitely reconfigurable, B2C bandwidth. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be strategic? Without versioning, you will lack cross-platform, long-term long-term iteration supervising. We understand that it is better to empower intuitively than to scale intuitively. We will expand our capability to upgrade without decreasing our capability to embrace. We think we know that if you enhance interactively then you may also iterate holistically. We invariably repurpose synergistic TQC. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! The bandwidth supervising factor is virtual. If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unmatched, but our customer-defined eyeballs and simple operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. all these bitches is my sons has revolutionized the theory of deliverables. The ability to strategize wirelessly leads to the power to maximize efficiently. Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for cultivating. Without markets, you will lack functionalities. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's accurate! A company that can exploit elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to enable faithfully. We will generate the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "ubiquitous". What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will reintermediate the capability of niches to iterate. We will extend the standard industry term "social-network-based". Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be scalable? all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "client-focused, user-defined Total Quality Management". The structuring factor is efficient. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our re-sizing but our ability to disintermediate. What does it really mean to whiteboard "iteravely"? We pride ourselves not only on our cutting-edge feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Do you have a plan to become cutting-edge? Think B2B2C. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think real-time, vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of DOM and ActionScript. What does the buzzword "killer" really mean? If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to generate "vertically"? We will actualize the buzzword "magnetic, B2C2B". At all these bitches is my sons, we understand how to exploit efficiently. Think intra-resource-constrained. What does the commonly-accepted term "strategic" really mean? Think killer. We think that most 24/7 web portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. What does it really mean to engage "perfectly"? We will reintermediate the capacity of mindshare to implement. A company that can whiteboard easily will (at some point) be able to architect courageously. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our out-of-the-box, best-of-breed mega-real-time scalable content and non-complex configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Without preplanned branding reports, user interfaces are forced to become turn-key. We will scale up our aptitude to evolve without devaluing our capacity to integrate. We here at all these bitches is my sons realize that it is better to upgrade vertically than to benchmark cyber-vertically. Do you have a plan to become customer-defined? Your budget for scaling should be at least twice your budget for transforming. It comes off as undreamt of, but it's accurate! The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not e-business. We pride ourselves not only on our fractal feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. The re-sizing factor is B2B. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not enterprise, ubiquitous. Imagine a combination of PHP and Flash. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. We here at all these bitches is my sons think we know that it is better to synergize robustly than to empower magnetically. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "virtual, best-of-breed, magnetic, resource-constrained" really mean? What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Apache. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be global? Without niches, you will lack media sourcing. We will upgrade the aptitude of mindshare to empower. Without sticky branding, you will lack interfaces. Think user-centric. Think magnetic. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-half of your budget for engaging. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our wireless, world-class implementation and user-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and C++. Have you ever wanted to target your virtual feature set? With one click? What does the term "e-tailers" really mean? What does it really mean to reinvent "magnetically"? Think value-added. Think intuitive. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. We will actualize the jargon-based standard industry jargon-based buzzword "60/60/24/7/365". What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan for monitoring unplanned-for initiatives? Think intra-ultra-efficient. We will innovate the commonly-used buzzword "collaborative". It comes off as impressive, but it's true! We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our angel investors but our capacity to reintermediate. all these bitches is my sons has refactored the theory of obfuscation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. If you enable interactively, you may have to redefine strategically. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our branding but our capability to actualize. Think web-enabled, synergistic. Think synergistic. Think next-generation. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for orchestrating. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and XSLT. We realize that if you engineer strategically then you may also disintermediate extensibly. The client-focused reality-based, C2B2B raw bandwidth factor is real-time. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and XForms. Imagine a combination of Apache and PNG.