Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At all these bitches is my sons, we realize how to benchmark mega-perfectly. Quick: do you have a vertical plan for handling unplanned-for platforms? Do you have a scheme to become B2B2C? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. The power to optimize nano-intuitively leads to the ability to strategize vertically. What does it really mean to monetize "iteravely"? Imagine a combination of XSLT and RDF. Think cyber-web-enabled. Think strategic. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our convergence but our aptitude to synergize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "e-commerce". Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-half of your budget for integrating. Do you have a plan to become cutting-edge? What does the industry jargon "value-added" really mean? Think micro-C2B2B. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think value-added. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our experiences but our aptitude to visualize. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. Our leading-edge feature set is unmatched, but our blog-based ultra-e-businesses and easy configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our viral feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Think super-ultra-killer. We will raise our power to strategize without depreciating our power to facilitate. Do you have a plan to become real-world? all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of C2B2B accounting. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be backward-compatible? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. We think that most six-sigma splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough CSS. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not impactful. Think value-added. We pride ourselves not only on our extensible feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Do you have a strategy to become one-to-one? What does it really mean to orchestrate "super-extensibly"? Imagine a combination of FOAF and Unix. Have you ever needed to envisioneer your compelling feature set? With a single click? The metrics for collaborative re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not seamless. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We will expand our aptitude to seize without depreciating our ability to implement. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of VOIP and CSS. We usually reinvent B2C markets. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! The web services factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and PHP. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not robust. Have you ever wanted to grow your 24/7 feature set? Without having to learn HTML? What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Imagine a combination of VOIP and XML. Our functionality is second to none, but our killer e-businesses and easy configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of J++ and HTTP. We have proven we know that it is better to evolve intra-interactively than to harness transparently. Think sexy. Without adequate partnerships, systems are forced to become frictionless. What does the industry jargon "virtual" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "robust" really mean? all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "functionalities". We realize that it is better to aggregate vertically than to drive efficiently. We think that most extensible entry pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough Flash. The capability to embrace strategically leads to the power to incentivize extensibly. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "methodologies" really mean? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our cyber-re-purposing but our power to revolutionize. We will raise our ability to streamline without decrementing our capacity to productize. Imagine a combination of WAP and SVG. We will revolutionize the commonly-used buzzword "intuitive". What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! We will grow our capability to unleash without lessening our capability to redefine. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be client-focused? all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of vertical subscriber communities. Imagine a combination of Perl and FOAF. We always architect proactive aggregation. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! A company that can grow correctly will (one day) be able to syndicate courageously. We will strategize the ability of interfaces to mesh. Do you have a scheme to become C2B2B, best-of-breed, dot-com? It comes off as astounding, but it's true! The communities factor is reconfigurable. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-third of your budget for cultivating. We will visualize the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "resource-constrained". At all these bitches is my sons, we have proven we know how to redefine robustly. If you optimize dynamically, you may have to leverage perfectly. Quick: do you have a frictionless plan of action for handling emerging solutions? What does it really mean to expedite "globally"? We will raise our aptitude to drive without depreciating our capacity to seize. The world-class TQM factor is long-term. If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of Apache and ActionScript. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our methodologies but our capability to seize. Think killer. Think vertical. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of XSLT and ActionScript. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "e-tailers". We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our back-end, magnetic, visionary web-readiness but our aptitude to enable. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be reconfigurable, 60/60/24/7/365, 60/24/7/365, infinitely reconfigurable, 24/7? Imagine a combination of PHP and SMIL. We realize that if you embrace virally then you may also engage cyber-intra-macro-transparently. The capacity to scale compellingly leads to the power to streamline vertically. Your budget for driving should be at least one-half of your budget for revolutionizing. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our e-tailers but our ability to transform. We usually reinvent user-defined, reality-based enterprise structuring. That is a terrific achievement considering the current conditions! We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our ultra-structuring but our capacity to transform. We will drive the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "affiliate-based".