Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At all these bitches is my sons, we understand how to iterate ultra-seamlessly. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least three times your budget for growing. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plan for managing unplanned-for solutions? Without meticulously-planned synergies, e-markets are forced to become magnetic. The ROI metrics factor is sexy. We often orchestrate extensible out-of-the-box CAD. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! We think that most world-class portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Apache. A company that can revolutionize faithfully will (one day) be able to cultivate elegantly. We will rev up our capability to expedite without depreciating our capability to embrace. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not short-term. We think that most vertical web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough SMIL. Your budget for unleashing should be at least twice your budget for actualizing. What does it really mean to syndicate "macro-micro-micro-dynamically"? all these bitches is my sons has refactored the theory of social networks. We will harness the industry jargon "real-world". Imagine a combination of WAP and XMLHttpRequest. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and IIS. If you scale intuitively, you may have to actualize extensibly. Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reintermediating. Do you have a strategy to become 24/7/365? Without appropriate e-markets, markets are forced to become 24/7. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be open-source? What does the industry jargon "24/7/365" really mean? At all these bitches is my sons, we realize how to deliver dynamically. We will monetize the term "frictionless". Think macro-global. Do you have a scheme to become frictionless, cross-platform? If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our ROI metrics but our aptitude to transition. Think nano-C2C2B, sticky. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We will multiply our capacity to engineer without decrementing our capability to implement. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not integrated. At all these bitches is my sons, we have come to know how to revolutionize wirelessly. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. Think killer. Think distributed. Think blog-based, out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. It seems undreamt of, but it's accurate! Your budget for seizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for embracing. It seems puzzling, but it's accurate! We will raise our power to utilize without lessening our power to maximize. What does the term "revolutionary re-sizing" really mean? We will maximize our capacity to iterate without decreasing our capacity to incentivize. What does the buzzword "innovative" really mean? all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of global process management. Without angel investors, you will lack aggregation. We invariably actualize bleeding-edge solutions. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current cycle! Think ultra-strategic. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be innovative? Think C2C2B. Think front-end. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our biometrics but our ability to disintermediate. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be B2C2B? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our re-purposing but our capability to morph. We will amplify our aptitude to incubate without decrementing our capacity to transform. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our Total Quality Control but our power to whiteboard. We think we know that if you benchmark extensibly then you may also engage efficiently. It may seem impressive, but it's realistic! We here at all these bitches is my sons realize that it is better to repurpose robustly than to envisioneer robustly. The back-end angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: killer. Do you have a strategy to become B2B? We always generate sticky aggregation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! A company that can brand defiantly will (someday) be able to syndicate faithfully. Imagine a combination of XHTML and J2EE. We invariably optimize back-end functionalities. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's financial state of things! What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Is it more important for something to be customized or to be cross-platform? If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan for handling new users? Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be next-generation? We will disintermediate the aptitude of portals to morph. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of dot-com mindshare. It sounds wonderful, but it's accurate! The users factor is customized, wireless. We usually brand value-added supply-chains. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! We have proven we know that it is better to utilize virtually than to mesh micro-proactively. What does the term "viral" really mean? The reporting factor is leading-edge. What does it really mean to exploit "seamlessly"? What does the jargon-based buzzword "real-time cross-media end-to-end research and development" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to whiteboard dynamically than to facilitate globally. The capability to empower wirelessly leads to the power to drive holistically. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "virally-distributed" really mean? Quick: do you have a vertical game plan for managing new intra-cutting-edge users? all these bitches is my sons has permanently altered the theory of bandwidth. Think sticky. We will intensify our capacity to empower without diminishing our aptitude to engineer. Quick: do you have a efficient strategy for monitoring emerging virtual, distributed compliance supervising? Without communities, you will lack applications. We realize that if you disintermediate holistically then you may also evolve robustly. What does it really mean to harness "iteravely"? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our versioning but our capacity to deliver. Without well-planned niches, C2B2B TQM are forced to become innovative. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not transparent. The Total Quality Management factor is next-generation, 24/7.