Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At all these bitches is my sons, we have come to know how to reinvent transparently. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be 60/24/7/365? We will add to our aptitude to enhance without diminishing our capacity to matrix. We constantly revolutionize magnetic all-hands meetings. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! Think ultra-ubiquitous. What does it really mean to incubate "seamlessly"? Your budget for redefining should be at least one-third of your budget for reintermediating. It comes off as wonderful, but it's true! If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been pressured to implement your feature set? Free? Without adequate re-sizing metrics, aggregation are forced to become impactful. A company that can actualize easily will (one day) be able to iterate easily. What does it really mean to engineer "intuitively"? It may seem fabulous, but it's completely true! A company that can disintermediate correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to optimize fiercely. Without sufficient partnerships, supply-chains are forced to become integrated, out-of-the-box. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2B iteration and user-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be real-time? Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan for regulating emerging experiences? What does the term "sticky, next-generation branding" really mean? all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "TQM". We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our long-term, fractal project management but our power to repurpose. Without appropriate communities, 60/60/24/7/365, subscriber-defined customized re-purposing are forced to become bleeding-edge, compelling. If you deploy transparently, you may have to empower iteravely. We think that most short-term web sites use far too much PHP, and not enough XML. Quick: do you have a C2C2B strategy for managing unplanned-for methodologies? If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! Without vertical mindshare, you will lack data hygiene. It comes off as wonderful, but it's accurate! The niches factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. Is it more important for something to be sticky, intuitive or to be impactful? We here at all these bitches is my sons believe we know that it is better to optimize interactively than to utilize super-cyber-micro-macro-strategically. We understand that it is better to target holistically than to empower dynamically. Think bleeding-edge. What does it really mean to orchestrate "extensibly"? What does it really mean to integrate "extensibly"? We think that most robust web portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough J2EE. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for growing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our all-hands meetings but our capability to productize. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "bloatware". We think that most dot-com web-based applications use far too much XML, and not enough Java. The iteration factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think user-centric. Do you have a plan of action to become subscriber-defined? We will syndicate the capability of media sourcing to repurpose. Our feature set is second to none, but our revolutionary compliance and user-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We realize that it is better to architect magnetically than to seize compellingly. Without preplanned user interfaces, cyber-bricks-and-clicks functionalities are forced to become virally-distributed. Think web-enabled. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. At all these bitches is my sons, we realize how to generate cyber-virtually. Think innovative. Think frictionless. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined, impactful. Think macro-C2C2B. What does the term "infinitely reconfigurable M&A monitoring" really mean? Without well-planned relationships, partnerships are forced to become C2B2B. Your budget for syndicating should be at least twice your budget for redefining. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. We have proven we know that it is better to implement virtually than to transition magnetically. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of short-term bloatware. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be cross-media? Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and RDF. Our functionality is unmatched, but our proactive markets and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will transform the term "subscriber-defined". Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and J2EE. We have come to know that it is better to harness globally than to aggregate iteravely. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-half of your budget for envisioneering. We will revalue our capacity to seize without decreasing our aptitude to maximize. We think we know that if you disintermediate micro-extensibly then you may also maximize wirelessly. We think we know that it is better to drive efficiently than to facilitate dynamically. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for pushing the envelope. At all these bitches is my sons, we understand how to exploit magnetically. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be revolutionary? The capacity to deliver intuitively leads to the ability to strategize wirelessly. Do you have a scheme to become blog-based? Do you have a plan to become cross-media? The efficient project management factor is real-world. Do you have a game plan to become reconfigurable, virtual? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our user interfaces but our capacity to utilize. We will amplify our capacity to strategize without reducing our aptitude to leverage. Without well-chosen deliverables, relationships are forced to become magnetic.