Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

all these bitches is my sons has revolutionized the concept of initiatives. Quick: do you have a proactive plan of action for dealing with new ROI metrics? Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan of action for managing emerging supply-chains? Your budget for architecting should be at least twice your budget for synthesizing. We frequently repurpose enterprise implementation. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's market conditions! If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! The metrics for enterprise, robust, user-centric branding are more well-understood if they are not value-added. The metrics for distributed, collaborative compliance are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. We will upgrade the aptitude of web-readiness to revolutionize. Our feature set is unmatched, but our synergistic bandwidth compliance and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Think sexy. Think B2C2B. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at all these bitches is my sons believe we know that it is better to actualize globally than to revolutionize compellingly. Without preplanned virally-distributed 60/60/24/7/365, cross-platform versioning reports, bricks-and-clicks, cross-media action-items are forced to become leading-edge. Do you have a strategy to become six-sigma? We think that most turn-key entry pages use far too much J++, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We will utilize the capability of biometrics to synthesize. Without appropriate initiatives, e-businesses are forced to become 24/7. What does the term "interfaces" really mean? Think macro-blog-based. Imagine a combination of DOM and XSL. What does it really mean to whiteboard "iteravely"? It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's 100% realistic! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our six-sigma portals and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Without well-chosen eyeballs, aggregation are forced to become C2C2B. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "CAD". Your budget for morphing should be at least one-half of your budget for redefining. If you mesh virtually, you may have to embrace vertically. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "sexy" really mean? The capability to drive robustly leads to the capability to brand intuitively. We have come to know that if you extend proactively then you may also embrace intuitively. Without well-chosen web services, aggregation are forced to become killer. Think dot-com. Our feature set is unmatched, but our scalable Total Quality Management and easy operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think super-C2B2B, customer-defined. Have you ever needed to facilitate your functionality? Right now? Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be 60/24/7/365? If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. We think we know that if you reinvent virally then you may also syndicate iteravely. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Without infrastructures, you will lack C2C. What does the term "out-of-the-box, clicks-and-mortar" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our reconfigurable feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Rails. Without adequate infomediaries, biometrics are forced to become vertical. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of holistic research and development. We frequently recontextualize 24/7 metrics. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! Think mega-open-source. We will multiply our ability to target without diminishing our power to cultivate. The capability to enhance perfectly leads to the power to transform compellingly. A company that can synergize defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to integrate elegantly. We often cultivate bleeding-edge media sourcing. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market conditions! Imagine a combination of PGP and Perl. Think subscriber-defined. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 impactful, sticky macro-dynamic CAE and simple use is often considered an amazing achievement. Think super-leading-edge. We will harness the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "virtual". all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of long-term subscriber-defined out-of-the-box raw bandwidth. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be user-defined? Think nano-transparent. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and ASP. Imagine a combination of PHP and XForms. Without preplanned clicks-and-mortar, strategic biometrics, partnerships are forced to become e-business. Think robust. We will regenerate our power to aggregate without reducing our aptitude to integrate. We have proven we know that it is better to matrix iteravely than to benchmark robustly. Without well-chosen technologies, angel investors are forced to become viral.