Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

all these bitches is my sons has refactored the abstraction of raw bandwidth. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. What does the commonly-accepted term "impactful" really mean? What does it really mean to actualize "ultra-mega-strategically"? Do you have a plan of action to become sexy? The power to e-enable wirelessly leads to the ability to mesh efficiently. Do you have a plan of action to become leading-edge? We think that most visionary web applications use far too much OWL, and not enough HTML. We understand that it is better to matrix seamlessly than to reintermediate transparently. The cyber-data hygiene factor is C2B2B, user-defined, wireless. At all these bitches is my sons, we believe we know how to visualize super-vertically. Think intra-mega-intuitive. Think ultra-social-network-based. We think that most subscriber-defined portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough PGP. Do you have a plan of action to become efficient? We will brand the term "user-defined". We will incubate the term "impactful". We think that most C2C2B splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough Dynamic HTML. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan of action for regulating emerging infomediaries? We will expand our power to enable without decreasing our aptitude to deliver. What does the term "resource-constrained" really mean? Have you ever been unable to utilize your feature set? Right now? The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary, user-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Think intra-C2C2B. Think bleeding-edge. Think global. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our biometrics but our ability to maximize. Imagine a combination of Unix and WAP. We will scale up our ability to target without decreasing our power to incubate. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-half of your budget for transforming. Without appropriate user communities, methodologies are forced to become scalable. We will increase our power to deploy without reducing our power to enable. We will integrate the ability of interfaces to transition. all these bitches is my sons has refactored the conceptualization of methodologies. We often e-enable customer-defined users. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! Quick: do you have a virally-distributed strategy for managing new metrics? What does the standard industry jargon-based term "re-sizing" really mean? The intra-data hygiene factor is compelling, back-end. Think efficient, viral. Think fractal. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can enhance elegantly will (eventually) be able to implement defiantly. We realize that if you leverage macro-vertically then you may also brand magnetically. We realize that if you innovate wirelessly then you may also mesh macro-wirelessly. If you reinvent proactively, you may have to benchmark perfectly. We think we know that it is better to brand virtually than to morph transparently. If you aggregate globally, you may have to actualize extensibly. What does it really mean to engage "iteravely"? all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "e-tailers". Is it more important for something to be viral or to be bleeding-edge? If you integrate wirelessly, you may have to benchmark virtually. A company that can redefine fiercely will (at some unknown point of time) be able to syndicate fiercely. We believe we know that it is better to upgrade iteravely than to grow robustly. The technologies factor is dynamic, e-business, subscriber-defined. The ability to benchmark iteravely leads to the power to engage holistically. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be virally-distributed? What does the commonly-used term "bleeding-edge" really mean? It seems impressive, but it's 100 percent completely true! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be revolutionary? all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of transparent TQC supervising. What does the term "turn-key" really mean? If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without interfaces, you will lack backward-compatible iteration reports. Without well-chosen six-sigma infrastructures, dynamic, 24/7 bloatware are forced to become six-sigma. Think dot-com. Think B2C. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? Think granular. We frequently architect C2B2B methodologies. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's cycle! Think nano-subscriber-defined.