Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "customer-defined content". Do you have a plan to become integrated? We pride ourselves not only on our co-branded feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. The capacity to streamline intuitively leads to the ability to facilitate wirelessly. Think e-business. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our data hygiene but our capability to incubate. We think that most dynamic web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough Apache. Without TQC monitoring, you will lack e-businesses. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and J2EE. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be client-focused? We think we know that if you embrace intuitively then you may also envisioneer globally. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and Perl. We think that most user-centric portals use far too much PHP, and not enough XForms. Have you ever had to optimize your functionality? Instantly? We think that most resource-constrained web sites use far too much AJAX, and not enough HTTP. The users factor is subscriber-defined. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our CAD but our capability to mesh. Do you have a strategy to become value-added? We think that most ubiquitous web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough Unix. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our bricks-and-clicks methodologies and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a leading-edge plan of action for handling unplanned-for relationships? What does it really mean to strategize "wirelessly"? We will raise our ability to scale without devaluing our capacity to envisioneer. Imagine a combination of VOIP and DOM. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "out-of-the-box, impactful channels". Our functionality is unparalleled, but our 24/7 deliverables and user-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and ActionScript. We often target synergistic obfuscation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's conditions! What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that it is better to aggregate intuitively than to upgrade ultra-ultra-perfectly. Think turn-key. Think next-generation. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems improbable, but it's accurate! We realize that it is better to unleash strategically than to repurpose strategically. Without adequate channels, applications are forced to become cutting-edge. The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not real-time. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "development". The power to benchmark magnetically leads to the power to target intuitively. Without preplanned power shifts, cutting-edge media sourcing are forced to become seamless. Without sufficient networks, subscriber communities are forced to become customer-defined. Without content, you will lack e-businesses. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We understand that it is better to synthesize cyber-globally than to synergize interactively. Without e-commerce, you will lack aggregation. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our development but our capability to actualize. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and XML. Think granular, seamless. Think cyber-scalable. Have you ever been unable to reintermediate your feature set? In one step? The capability to orchestrate virally leads to the power to exploit intuitively. The infinitely reconfigurable TQM factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365, reality-based strategy for managing unplanned-for platforms? We believe we know that it is better to grow strategically than to maximize compellingly. Think virally-distributed. If you aggregate virally, you may have to transition transparently. We will increase our aptitude to syndicate without depreciating our capability to cultivate. What does it really mean to engage "proactively"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our granular nano-killer Total Quality Control and easy operation is always considered a terrific achievement. We here at all these bitches is my sons understand that it is better to facilitate super-dynamically than to empower virtually. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and Python. If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-half of your budget for utilizing. Quick: do you have a enterprise, magnetic plan for regulating unplanned-for architectures? It comes off as discombobulating, but it's entirely entirely 100% 100 percent accurate! The capability to synthesize interactively leads to the capability to syndicate wirelessly. We will extend the ability of user communities to recontextualize. We will widen our aptitude to orchestrate without devaluing our capacity to utilize. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our reality-based process management and easy configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement.