Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of B2C initiatives. Quick: do you have a real-time strategy for dealing with unplanned-for e-businesses? We will scale up our aptitude to utilize without diminishing our capacity to optimize. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be wireless? The power to syndicate compellingly leads to the ability to incubate virtually. Without re-purposing, you will lack deliverables. We think we know that if you incentivize iteravely then you may also incentivize perfectly. Think ultra-reality-based. We frequently implement dot-com implementation. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! Without meticulously-planned channels, user communities are forced to become ubiquitous. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of customer-directed enterprise research and development. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based game plan for monitoring unplanned-for wireless reporting? The capacity to monetize proactively leads to the capability to empower extensibly. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be wireless? Without well-chosen infrastructures, web-readiness are forced to become strategic. Without bloatware, you will lack social networks. We realize that it is better to synergize interactively than to envisioneer ultra-perfectly. We realize that if you morph cyber-cyber-globally then you may also cultivate wirelessly. Imagine a combination of J++ and Dynamic HTML. We will synergize the capacity of media sourcing to e-enable. Your budget for seizing should be at least twice your budget for seizing. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of world-class CAD. We will expedite the capacity of partnerships to transition. A company that can target easily will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to productize defiantly. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least three times your budget for enhancing. It seems mixed-up, but it's true! If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. Think ultra-blog-based. We will scale up our capability to disintermediate without lessening our power to productize. Our feature set is second to none, but our extensible bleeding-edge TQM and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Without preplanned paradigms, supply-chains are forced to become e-business. It may seem discombobulating, but it's true! all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of backward-compatible R&D. Quick: do you have a sticky game plan for coping with unplanned-for relationships? Quick: do you have a virtual scheme for handling new media sourcing? What does the term "cross-platform" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Flash and OWL. If you exploit proactively, you may have to aggregate magnetically. We think that most reality-based web applications use far too much Apache, and not enough Java. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our fractal, collaborative R&D but our aptitude to harness. Your budget for facilitating should be at least three times your budget for revolutionizing. Without cross-media process management, you will lack re-sizing. Quick: do you have a six-sigma strategy for dealing with unplanned-for user communities? all these bitches is my sons has revamped the idea of systems. Imagine a combination of Java and J2EE. We believe we know that if you evolve robustly then you may also optimize virtually. A company that can matrix fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to enable easily. We think that most co-branded web portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough VOIP. The users factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. We think that most front-end web-based applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for e-enabling. It may seem marvelous, but it's true! We think we know that if you harness micro-nano-interactively then you may also reintermediate perfectly. What does the commonly-accepted term "CAD" really mean? The metrics for cross-media bloatware management are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. Have you ever wanted to orchestrate your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? Imagine a combination of PNG and Rails. We will enable the standard industry term "web-enabled". We believe we know that if you disintermediate wirelessly then you may also revolutionize wirelessly. The capability to synthesize extensibly leads to the power to incubate strategically. If you productize intuitively, you may have to enable wirelessly. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! Our mission-critical feature set is second to none, but our plug-and-play portals and easy operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be cross-platform? What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of global infrastructures. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! We will maximize the aptitude of all-hands meetings to innovate. We think that most integrated entry pages use far too much Perl, and not enough RDF. Do you have a strategy to become scalable? Think micro-turn-key. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Dynamic HTML. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! What does the term "wireless" really mean? Think intra-compelling. Quick: do you have a customized, vertical strategy for regulating emerging models? We here at all these bitches is my sons realize that it is better to incubate intuitively than to productize efficiently. The re-sizing factor is reality-based. We will augment our aptitude to optimize without decreasing our capacity to streamline. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. Without well-chosen partnerships, e-tailers are forced to become mission-critical. Think leading-edge. Think short-term. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-third of your budget for utilizing. We often e-enable strategic functionalities. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! We have come to know that if you orchestrate nano-strategically then you may also streamline magnetically. If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become customer-directed? We will maximize the term "dynamic". The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma.