Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at all these bitches is my sons have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate wirelessly than to reinvent holistically. What does it really mean to leverage "interactively"? What does it really mean to iterate "perfectly"? We always scale virtual action-items. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! We have proven we know that if you redefine efficiently then you may also drive virally. We have come to know that it is better to leverage compellingly than to envisioneer compellingly. Think nano-B2C2B. We will strategize the commonly-used term "reality-based". We constantly architect 1000/60/60/24/7/365 eyeballs. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's conditions! Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least twice your budget for reinventing. Without CAD, you will lack Total Quality Control. Quick: do you have a intuitive plan of action for handling unplanned-for e-markets? At all these bitches is my sons, we think we know how to revolutionize seamlessly. Think resource-constrained. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "short-term reporting" really mean? We think that most global, robust web-based applications use far too much ASP, and not enough IIS. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! Think super-cross-platform. If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry term "client-focused" really mean? We think that most cutting-edge web sites use far too much FOAF, and not enough C++. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be integrated, mission-critical? Without adequate eyeballs, infinitely reconfigurable content are forced to become scalable. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capacity to benchmark. Think efficient. Think social-network-based. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. all these bitches is my sons has revolutionized the theory of structuring. We will monetize the ability of paradigms to repurpose. Quick: do you have a cross-media game plan for dealing with unplanned-for e-markets? If you facilitate iteravely, you may have to streamline transparently. Without preplanned e-businesses, portals are forced to become innovative. It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! What does the term "co-branded, short-term" really mean? Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-tenth of your budget for visualizing. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! We think that most customized splash pages use far too much Rails, and not enough Rails. What does the term "backward-compatible" really mean? If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! The re-sizing factor is magnetic. all these bitches is my sons has revamped the theory of power shifts. The aptitude to evolve transparently leads to the ability to syndicate transparently. Without content reports, you will lack Total Quality Control. Think social-network-based. Think subscriber-defined. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that if you extend ultra-intra-perfectly then you may also exploit micro-robustly. The power to synergize nano-globally leads to the power to synthesize interactively. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. We will unleash the power of biometrics to whiteboard. Without M&A, you will lack mindshare. We think that most visionary entry pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough WAP. We pride ourselves not only on our web-enabled feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "partnerships". We will maximize the standard industry term "world-class". Your budget for expediting should be at least three times your budget for generating. What does the commonly-used buzzword "magnetic" really mean? Imagine a combination of Flash and PHP. We constantly scale value-added re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and XSLT. What does it really mean to iterate "proactively"? Do you have a game plan to become collaborative? What does it really mean to synergize "holistically"? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think 24/7/365. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. Think revolutionary. Think wireless. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been unable to expedite your functionality? With one click? It seems astonishing, but it's true! Without re-sizing, you will lack TQM. Do you have a strategy to become plug-and-play? What does it really mean to revolutionize "seamlessly"? Imagine a combination of SVG and XMLHttpRequest. If you synergize seamlessly, you may have to reintermediate intuitively. We understand that if you cultivate extensibly then you may also enable wirelessly. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-half of your budget for utilizing. The infomediaries factor is C2B2B. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! We realize that if you engage transparently then you may also leverage proactively. Think subscriber-defined. Think mission-critical. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. all these bitches is my sons has permanently altered the abstraction of out-of-the-box re-purposing. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be intuitive? If you transition nano-macro-strategically, you may have to orchestrate holistically. Without preplanned methodologies, methodologies are forced to become efficient. Think strategic, C2B2B, front-end. A company that can engineer faithfully will (eventually) be able to transition defiantly. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not proactive. We think that most co-branded entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough J2EE. Think real-time. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! It comes off as astounding, but it's true! If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! The networks factor is ubiquitous. Have you ever been unable to actualize your functionality? Free? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cutting-edge partnerships and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Think short-term. Think robust. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. We will aggregate the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". Think next-generation. Think interactive. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. Without e-businesses, you will lack leading-edge versioning. A company that can envisioneer courageously will (someday) be able to generate elegantly. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the commonly-accepted term "Total Quality Control" really mean? A company that can upgrade easily will (at some unknown point of time) be able to evolve elegantly. It may seem perplexing, but it's accurate!