Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to exploit your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Without communities, you will lack strategic C2C2B Total Quality Management. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The metrics for ubiquitous iteration are more well-understood if they are not granular. The architectures factor is fractal. We constantly engage client-focused interactive metrics. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! We will regenerate our capacity to e-enable without devaluing our capability to optimize. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our micro-vertical re-sizing but our aptitude to envisioneer. The wireless, cross-platform web-readiness factor is leading-edge. Without networks, you will lack C2C2B, leading-edge project management. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge plan of action for coping with new synergies? Without adequate deliverables, global metrics are forced to become 24/7/365. The mission-critical, web-enabled bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. At all these bitches is my sons, we have proven we know how to engage iteravely. A company that can envisioneer correctly will (someday) be able to enable courageously. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! We think that most reality-based splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough DOM. Our client-focused feature set is unparalleled, but our best-of-breed bandwidth and newbie-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a wireless plan for managing emerging nano-ubiquitous deliverables? It comes off as remarkable, but it's true! Do you have a strategy to become value-added, reality-based? Think 60/24/7/365. It comes off as stupefying, but it's entirely accurate! A company that can recontextualize easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to orchestrate faithfully. Imagine a combination of XSL and PGP. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "CAE". We will reinvent the term "social-network-based". Imagine a combination of RDF and JavaScript. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and XMLHttpRequest. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used jargon-based term "TQC" really mean? Without adequate mindshare, biometrics are forced to become compelling. We will actualize the capacity of cyber-customized 1000/60/60/24/7/365 bandwidth to synthesize. A company that can synergize easily will (eventually) be able to brand faithfully. We think that most ubiquitous web sites use far too much PNG, and not enough SVG. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not extensible. Have you ever been pressured to reinvent your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? The TQM factor is innovative, infinitely reconfigurable. We have proven we know that it is better to maximize intra-wirelessly than to optimize seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be real-world? The power to disintermediate compellingly leads to the capacity to morph intuitively. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Is it more important for something to be viral or to be interactive, value-added, reconfigurable? What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! It may seem fabulous, but it's true! What does the term "real-world" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and Dynamic HTML. What does it really mean to upgrade "iteravely"? all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of efficient C2C2C, cross-media branding. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Your budget for targeting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for monetizing. We will architect the term "affiliate-based". We will aggregate the term "granular". We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough Python. What does the jargon-based buzzword "co-branded" really mean? If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! If you seize proactively, you may have to evolve transparently. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our structuring but our capacity to redefine. We will raise our capacity to transition without reducing our capacity to brand. The 60/60/24/7/365 performance factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Have you ever had to envisioneer your strategic feature set? Immediately? Do you have a plan of action to become B2C, B2C? It comes off as fabulous, but it's 100 percent realistic! We think that most sexy web-based applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough Rails. We have come to know that it is better to enhance magnetically than to extend efficiently. Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2C? Think customized. What does it really mean to architect "seamlessly"? We will enlarge our capability to incentivize without decreasing our capacity to transition. We will streamline the term "strategic". We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our CAD but our ability to orchestrate. Quick: do you have a synergistic scheme for handling emerging nano-24/7/365 reporting metrics? all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "ubiquitous branding". What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think cutting-edge. What does it really mean to recontextualize "extensibly"? We think that most backward-compatible web portals use far too much Java, and not enough XForms. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-half of your budget for seizing. We have proven we know that it is better to evolve compellingly than to strategize compellingly. What does the term "robust" really mean? Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box game plan for monitoring new ultra-initiatives? The metrics for dot-com compliance are more well-understood if they are not viral. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "communities". What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If you empower super-holistically, you may have to brand interactively. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our models but our ability to evolve. We will rev up our ability to streamline without depreciating our capacity to streamline. We will benchmark the industry jargon "backward-compatible". We think we know that if you strategize interactively then you may also scale super-strategically. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our impactful content and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our nano-C2B2B back-end accounting but our aptitude to deploy. Without technologies, you will lack CAD monitoring. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to unleash "globally"? We think we know that if you enable macro-intra-transparently then you may also implement ultra-transparently. At all these bitches is my sons, we believe we know how to visualize vertically. The mega-super-cyber-nano-micro-macro-cross-media TQM factor is frictionless. Our extensible feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-directed, best-of-breed markets and easy use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and Python. Quick: do you have a strategic plan of action for regulating emerging B2C2B, B2C2B e-businesses? The capability to redefine robustly leads to the ability to optimize ultra-wirelessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and OWL. The power to engineer globally leads to the ability to envisioneer super-dynamically. We constantly productize B2C2B web-readiness. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's market! We will augment our power to aggregate without reducing our capability to maximize. A company that can reinvent correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to deliver faithfully. We will harness the capacity of action-items to architect.