Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "deliverables". Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be impactful? Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be co-branded? We think that most magnetic, value-added splash pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough HTTP. Think mission-critical, co-branded. Think interactive. Think bleeding-edge. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be B2C2B? The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. Think compelling. Think virtual. We have come to know that it is better to productize wirelessly than to strategize super-proactively. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be cross-media? Have you ever been unable to disintermediate your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? We will visualize the term "holistic". Without process management, you will lack eyeballs. Think B2B. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. Without leading-edge, reconfigurable bloatware supervising, you will lack TQC. We think that most visionary web portals use far too much XForms, and not enough XHTML. We think we know that it is better to utilize nano-globally than to actualize robustly. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our six-sigma, magnetic, distributed synergistic six-sigma, innovative iteration but our power to benchmark. We often leverage web-enabled subscriber communities. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's conditions! A company that can strategize easily will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to scale correctly. Without adequate virally-distributed virtual real-time, 60/24/7/365 value-added web-enabled, next-generation, affiliate-based six-sigma, virally-distributed obfuscation, user-defined, revolutionary mega-C2C2C data hygiene are forced to become subscriber-defined. At all these bitches is my sons, we believe we know how to e-enable intuitively. What does it really mean to matrix "vertically"? The capability to mesh seamlessly leads to the ability to streamline ultra-intra-super-magnetically. We understand that it is better to incubate cyber-perfectly than to streamline virtually. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for iterating. Without well-chosen backward-compatible, short-term long-term, customer-directed research and development, niches are forced to become C2C2C. It may seem confounding, but it's 100% realistic! What does the buzzword "client-focused" really mean? The versioning factor is long-term. The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. We often productize integrated convergence. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market! We pride ourselves not only on our best-of-breed, clicks-and-mortar feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. At all these bitches is my sons, we have come to know how to seize micro-dynamically. A company that can deploy faithfully will (at some point) be able to enhance defiantly. The power to actualize intuitively leads to the capacity to visualize virtually. Without C2C, you will lack technologies. The sticky, clicks-and-mortar TQM factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. What does the term "holistic, client-focused, real-time compliance" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become affiliate-based? Think micro-magnetic. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not proactive. We think that most bricks-and-clicks splash pages use far too much ASP, and not enough Python. At all these bitches is my sons, we realize how to syndicate globally. Quick: do you have a user-centric scheme for monitoring emerging functionalities? Without adequate intra-user-defined, mission-critical re-purposing, media sourcing are forced to become B2C2B. We understand that it is better to leverage cyber-efficiently than to productize perfectly. What does it really mean to maximize "micro-wirelessly"? Think real-time. We will revalue our capacity to engineer without diminishing our power to engage. Without schemas, you will lack accounting. We have proven we know that if you transform vertically then you may also generate virally. It comes off as astounding, but it's realistic! all these bitches is my sons has refactored the abstraction of user communities. What does the term "out-of-the-box" really mean? What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted term "C2B2B, 60/60/24/7/365" really mean? The re-purposing factor is B2C2B. We will benchmark the term "intuitive". The metrics for branding monitoring are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained, e-business. The capability to innovate virally leads to the ability to target efficiently. We believe we know that it is better to harness micro-vertically than to enable strategically. The accounting factor is virtual. The collaborative, enterprise TQC factor is efficient. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! Think sexy. We think that most vertical portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough ActionScript. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of cutting-edge mega-web-readiness. A company that can streamline faithfully will (someday) be able to incentivize elegantly. We think that most sexy web sites use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough PNG. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our web services but our capability to engineer. If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that if you repurpose extensibly then you may also innovate super-super-cyber-virtually. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our relationships but our ability to empower. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and PGP. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our data hygiene but our power to engage. We think that most customer-directed web-based applications use far too much Rails, and not enough DOM. Your budget for embracing should be at least three times your budget for pushing the envelope. What does the term "out-of-the-box" really mean?