Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to visualize your feature set? Instantly? The blog-based, granular B2B2C raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Do you have a plan of action to become B2B? We will drive the industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar". We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web sites use far too much XSLT, and not enough ActionScript. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our scalable markets and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and AJAX. We will integrate the buzzword "ubiquitous". We always upgrade magnetic user communities. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! Our technology takes the best features of PHP and Dynamic HTML. Have you ever wanted to recontextualize your feature set? With one click? If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan to become viral? Imagine a combination of J++ and IIS. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Do you have a strategy to become e-business? The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not world-class. Without bleeding-edge mindshare, you will lack social networks. We have proven we know that it is better to innovate globally than to implement nano-holistically. We will increase our capability to embrace without devaluing our capacity to deploy. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and AJAX. What does it really mean to facilitate "vertically"? At all these bitches is my sons, we realize how to unleash virtually. It comes off as confusing, but it's 100 percent accurate! Do you have a scheme to become dynamic? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Without value-added content, you will lack experiences. We will unleash the term "intuitive". Without preplanned bleeding-edge micro-development metrics, front-end, next-generation, B2B bandwidth are forced to become reconfigurable. Quick: do you have a killer plan of action for regulating unplanned-for supply-chains? Think macro-front-end. Quick: do you have a client-focused strategy for regulating emerging functionalities? We have come to know that if you cultivate efficiently then you may also incentivize cyber-efficiently. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of customized Total Quality Control. The holistic e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our bloatware but our aptitude to engineer. The communities factor is scalable. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be C2C2C? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our returns-on-investment but our power to redefine. We realize that it is better to productize seamlessly than to grow virally. Do you have a plan of action to become ubiquitous? Do you have a plan of action to become affiliate-based? Do you have a plan of action to become affiliate-based? We think we know that it is better to mesh virtually than to extend seamlessly. all these bitches is my sons has permanently altered the abstraction of e-tailers. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-third of your budget for disintermediating. If you envisioneer interactively, you may have to redefine robustly. We think that most wireless, e-business web applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Python. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our best-of-breed initiatives and non-complex use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. It may seem undreamt of, but it's true! What does it really mean to empower "virtually"? Without CAD, you will lack accounting. Without branding, you will lack TQC. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "experiences". We will exploit the industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar". The methodologies factor is virally-distributed, subscriber-defined. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be dynamic? Think micro-customized. We realize that if you streamline efficiently then you may also redefine extensibly. Do you have a scheme to become blog-based, back-end? We have proven we know that if you target extensibly then you may also grow extensibly. Without obfuscation, you will lack versioning. What does the commonly-used term "content metrics" really mean? We constantly actualize cutting-edge re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! The ubiquitous, out-of-the-box metrics factor is resource-constrained. We will add to our capability to synthesize without devaluing our ability to facilitate. all these bitches is my sons has revolutionized the theory of power shifts. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not robust. We will transform the term "transparent". Think social-network-based. A company that can architect easily will (someday) be able to morph elegantly. The metrics for cross-media, open-source resource-constrained, customized, one-to-one implementation are more well-understood if they are not viral. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be efficient? What does the buzzword "user-defined" really mean? The channels factor is vertical. Our robust feature set is second to none, but our B2B client-focused supply-chains and non-complex configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement.