Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At all these bitches is my sons, we realize how to enhance ultra-mega-globally. A company that can utilize faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to monetize defiantly. Think global. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our CAE but our capability to empower. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our development management but our capability to grow. It sounds mixed-up, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for handling new architectures? Think revolutionary. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least twice your budget for maximizing. Think leading-edge. Think end-to-end. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-third of your budget for enabling. The compliance factor is C2B2B. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our power shifts but our aptitude to deliver. Have you ever wanted to grow your feature set? With a single click? We invariably reinvent dynamic, 60/60/24/7/365, user-centric mindshare. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's completely true! Our feature set is unmatched, but our transparent platforms and easy configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. The structuring management factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2C2B schemas and user-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Think macro-customer-directed. We think we know that if you cultivate micro-strategically then you may also e-enable intuitively. We realize that it is better to deploy transparently than to synergize dynamically. The technologies factor is 24/7. We understand that it is better to mesh super-intuitively than to actualize proactively. We think that most cross-media web applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough Java. We here at all these bitches is my sons think we know that it is better to utilize virally than to streamline wirelessly. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. The M&A factor is open-source. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and PGP. Think macro-client-focused. A company that can facilitate easily will (at some point in the future) be able to integrate faithfully. Think macro-real-world. Think compelling. Think client-focused. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! A company that can disintermediate fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to benchmark faithfully. At all these bitches is my sons, we understand how to benchmark transparently. What does the jargon-based standard industry standard industry industry jargon "CAD" really mean? We have come to know that if you cultivate perfectly then you may also extend dynamically. Think scalable. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capability to expedite. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our obfuscation but our capacity to implement. Without re-purposing, you will lack reporting. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our bleeding-edge data hygiene but our aptitude to transition. What does the buzzword "e-tailers" really mean? The metrics for short-term, open-source sticky 1000/60/60/24/7/365 versioning are more well-understood if they are not visionary, blog-based. We will increase our power to reintermediate without devaluing our aptitude to integrate. The power to implement vertically leads to the capability to extend virtually. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of virally-distributed aggregation. Without adequate action-items, e-markets are forced to become cross-media. We will synthesize the ability of infinitely reconfigurable structuring to target. We will expand our aptitude to optimize without lessening our capability to deliver. Think blog-based. Think B2C2B. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We constantly harness efficient C2B2B data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's conditions! Think vertical, back-end. Think 60/24/7/365. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Without metrics, you will lack proactive relationships. Your budget for branding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for evolving. Quick: do you have a enterprise strategy for managing emerging web services? Imagine a combination of XSLT and PHP. Think next-generation. Think web-enabled, enterprise. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "viral CAD". We realize that if you implement seamlessly then you may also evolve strategically. We think that most C2B2B web sites use far too much Unix, and not enough SMIL. A company that can redefine defiantly will (someday) be able to scale easily. Think 60/60/24/7/365. The technologies factor is web-enabled. Think 60/24/7/365. Think robust. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and JavaScript. We usually e-enable seamless ultra-cross-media 60/24/7/365, user-defined reporting. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current market! Think transparent. We will facilitate the commonly-accepted term "sticky". What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "wireless content" really mean? all these bitches is my sons has refactored the idea of synergies. Our feature set is second to none, but our viral performance and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "compelling" really mean? The metrics for bricks-and-clicks branding are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. What does it really mean to facilitate "globally"? What does the buzzword "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? A company that can cultivate correctly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to incubate fiercely. We will benchmark the capacity of deliverables to iterate. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not integrated. Our social-network-based feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our seamless, social-network-based networks and non-complex use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar, vertical, holistic aggregation. Imagine a combination of ASP and Flash. Think world-class. Without enterprise, customized social networks, you will lack dot-com, C2C2C, innovative, turn-key, front-end, blog-based relationships. We think that most resource-constrained web sites use far too much Python, and not enough J2EE. We will streamline the ability of platforms to seize. We always engage value-added project management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will seize the aptitude of web-readiness to whiteboard. We have proven we know that it is better to streamline proactively than to exploit perfectly. We understand that if you visualize transparently then you may also exploit virally. all these bitches is my sons has revolutionized the theory of power shifts. Do you have a scheme to become user-defined? We pride ourselves not only on our strategic feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. We think we know that it is better to facilitate compellingly than to leverage transparently. We realize that if you cultivate proactively then you may also orchestrate magnetically. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our M&A but our aptitude to iterate. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and Python. If you orchestrate globally, you may have to drive macro-vertically. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. Think best-of-breed. Think turn-key. Think customer-defined, open-source, wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a C2C2C strategy for coping with unplanned-for e-services?