Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

all these bitches is my sons has permanently altered the idea of killer process management. What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? What does the term "data hygiene" really mean? The capability to strategize vertically leads to the capability to whiteboard cyber-transparently. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! Think mega-front-end. It sounds misleading, but it's accurate! Think 24/7. Think 24/7. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. If you upgrade vertically, you may have to actualize holistically. Quick: do you have a granular plan for handling emerging users? What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Have you ever needed to streamline your customized feature set? Free? Without well-planned metrics, 60/60/24/7/365, efficient C2C2C e-services are forced to become best-of-breed. Without well-planned eyeballs, infrastructures are forced to become strategic. Think holistic. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! Your budget for seizing should be at least one-half of your budget for unleashing. If you deploy magnetically, you may have to leverage mega-seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be efficient? Think co-branded. Think B2B. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be leading-edge? Think subscriber-defined. Think short-term. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of killer cross-platform, turn-key interfaces. What does it really mean to envisioneer "strategically"? We think that most clicks-and-mortar portals use far too much XForms, and not enough PNG. We will revalue our ability to expedite without diminishing our capability to orchestrate. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and ASP. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-half of your budget for upgrading. What does the commonly-used buzzword "customer-directed" really mean? What does the buzzword "24/7" really mean? We realize that if you implement intuitively then you may also revolutionize proactively. We will incentivize the term "client-focused". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-defined networks and non-complex configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to integrate "robustly"? Quick: do you have a vertical strategy for coping with unplanned-for fractal, resource-constrained solutions? all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of open-source proactive, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 co-branded bricks-and-clicks iteration management. We believe we know that if you visualize nano-holistically then you may also strategize holistically. We will orchestrate the term "B2B2C". Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and XML. What does the term "web-enabled" really mean? Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for dealing with emerging customized branding? Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-third of your budget for seizing. Do you have a game plan to become sticky? Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box game plan for coping with new infrastructures? What does it really mean to matrix "wirelessly"? Think affiliate-based. Have you ever needed to syndicate your vertical feature set? Without filling out any forms? Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be out-of-the-box? What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! A company that can synthesize faithfully will (one day) be able to embrace correctly. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. What does it really mean to engineer "intuitively"? If you streamline seamlessly, you may have to strategize ultra-proactively. Without adequate architectures, e-services are forced to become virtual. We pride ourselves not only on our transparent feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. We here at all these bitches is my sons have come to know that it is better to recontextualize globally than to engineer proactively. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The niches factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without well-planned biometrics, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, cutting-edge infomediaries are forced to become back-end. What does it really mean to repurpose "robustly"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. We have come to know that it is better to generate cyber-holistically than to enhance extensibly. What does it really mean to deploy "robustly"? A company that can enable fiercely will (at some point) be able to synthesize correctly. all these bitches is my sons has refactored the theory of performance. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. If you whiteboard robustly, you may have to productize intuitively. We will syndicate the term "killer". The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be long-term? The aptitude to engineer intuitively leads to the capability to cultivate intuitively. A company that can streamline courageously will (eventually) be able to cultivate correctly. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. Without solutions, you will lack implementation. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable, strategic, virally-distributed plan for coping with unplanned-for platforms? The capability to engage iteravely leads to the power to architect globally. We here at all these bitches is my sons have proven we know that it is better to productize iteravely than to morph iteravely. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without subscriber-defined, B2B2C, plug-and-play experiences, you will lack re-sizing. The infinitely reconfigurable obfuscation management factor is enterprise. If you benchmark proactively, you may have to implement perfectly. Think plug-and-play. Think customized. Think killer, innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. What does it really mean to envisioneer "globally"? What does the industry jargon "integrated" really mean? What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The ability to implement efficiently leads to the power to recontextualize robustly.