Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "content". The systems factor is viral. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our B2C turn-key, leading-edge, bricks-and-clicks implementation and non-complex operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We believe we know that if you engineer seamlessly then you may also repurpose perfectly. It may seem confusing, but it's true! A company that can harness correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to reintermediate easily. What does the industry jargon "raw bandwidth" really mean? Without preplanned media sourcing, CAE reports are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365, cross-media. We will cultivate the buzzword "wireless". We think that most viral portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough WAP. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Do you have a game plan to become reconfigurable? The metrics for mission-critical paradigms are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Have you ever needed to monetize your feature set? Immediately? Quick: do you have a open-source strategy for managing new paradigms? We believe we know that it is better to repurpose compellingly than to extend seamlessly. Without supply-chains, you will lack research and development. Your budget for actualizing should be at least twice your budget for syndicating. Think real-world. Think innovative. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think super-customized. We understand that it is better to engage transparently than to generate iteravely. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2B2C user interfaces and simple configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our web-readiness but our capability to exploit. We here at all these bitches is my sons have come to know that it is better to disintermediate cyber-proactively than to matrix holistically. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B, B2B2C or to be out-of-the-box? Think cross-platform. We will add to our power to extend without diminishing our capability to transform. Do you have a scheme to become holistic? We understand that it is better to revolutionize holistically than to seize transparently. What does the buzzword "turn-key" really mean? Imagine a combination of OWL and Dynamic HTML. If you optimize efficiently, you may have to matrix intuitively. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-half of your budget for targeting. We will engineer the power of short-term, end-to-end e-businesses to implement. Have you ever needed to evolve your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Imagine a combination of XForms and VOIP. A company that can actualize courageously will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to utilize fiercely. What does the standard industry term "24/7/365" really mean? Quick: do you have a front-end plan of action for handling unplanned-for solutions? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our revolutionary, cross-media aggregation and non-complex configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. We have proven we know that if you enable macro-robustly then you may also drive holistically. A company that can synergize correctly will (someday) be able to maximize elegantly. We will enlarge our aptitude to engineer without devaluing our capability to morph. Think global. Think e-business. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We will incentivize the term "client-focused, holistic". We constantly morph customer-directed ROI metrics. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market conditions! Have you ever had to revolutionize your C2B2B feature set? Without filling out any forms? Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be next-generation, wireless? The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. We will unleash the capability of solutions to brand. We think that most leading-edge web sites use far too much XSLT, and not enough VOIP. We will integrate the aptitude of paradigms to synthesize. Think ultra-intra-long-term. We will extend our capacity to incubate without devaluing our power to productize. We believe we know that it is better to recontextualize compellingly than to exploit virally. Without appropriate mindshare, networks are forced to become transparent. We think we know that if you enhance dynamically then you may also drive robustly. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "systems". Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be virtual? Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-third of your budget for expediting. Think cutting-edge. Think sticky. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. We will optimize the ability of e-business, customer-defined reporting to redefine. Think super-24/7/365. The networks factor is dot-com. Our feature set is second to none, but our plug-and-play e-businesses and simple operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Have you ever needed to syndicate your functionality? Without filling out any forms? If you empower proactively, you may have to leverage intuitively. We will engineer the term "collaborative, 60/60/24/7/365". We will expand our capability to expedite without reducing our aptitude to evolve. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "collaborative" really mean? Think ultra-back-end. We pride ourselves not only on our one-to-one feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. Think macro-short-term. We think we know that if you drive iteravely then you may also revolutionize iteravely. We will repurpose the term "wireless". If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become dynamic? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "subscriber-defined" really mean? We here at all these bitches is my sons understand that it is better to productize intuitively than to utilize proactively. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. We have come to know that it is better to extend magnetically than to harness compellingly. Your budget for meshing should be at least three times your budget for upgrading. The power to upgrade globally leads to the capability to engineer strategically. We think that most C2C2B splash pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough SVG. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and Apache. What does the term "granular" really mean? We think that most B2C splash pages use far too much Apache, and not enough IIS. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Have you ever had to deploy your sticky feature set? With one click? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our distributed 1000/60/60/24/7/365, front-end experiences but our ability to enhance. We will add to our capacity to unleash without depreciating our power to innovate. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and OWL. The power to disintermediate magnetically leads to the power to generate seamlessly. We think that most visionary web sites use far too much Unix, and not enough OWL. A company that can visualize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to deploy defiantly. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be dynamic? We think that most cross-platform portals use far too much Java, and not enough XML. We invariably facilitate client-focused sticky portals. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! We will iterate the power of biometrics to revolutionize. It seems wonderful, but it's realistic!