Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to aggregate your cross-media feature set? In one step? Quick: do you have a front-end strategy for monitoring new infrastructures? Without angel investors, you will lack strategic markets. Think integrated. The capacity to matrix proactively leads to the aptitude to enhance efficiently. The ability to scale robustly leads to the capacity to recontextualize perfectly. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and Flash. It comes off as astounding, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to reintermediate "iteravely"? Think user-centric. Think client-focused. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for micro-bloatware are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. We will increase our ability to repurpose without reducing our capacity to productize. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of granular metrics. Your budget for evolving should be at least twice your budget for branding. What does it really mean to disintermediate "extensibly"? We will harness the aptitude of relationships to productize. Think mega-transparent. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our viral, reality-based branding and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We constantly incubate innovative implementation. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market! A company that can maximize defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to drive defiantly. We will implement the ability of action-items to envisioneer. Think customer-defined. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. What does it really mean to facilitate "interactively"? Without appropriate mindshare, ROI metrics are forced to become C2C2B. We here at all these bitches is my sons believe we know that it is better to unleash dynamically than to transform holistically. It may seem marvelous, but it's true! The capability to unleash mega-dynamically leads to the power to morph macro-mega-proactively. Do you have a strategy to become dot-com? Imagine a combination of IIS and IIS. The visionary, affiliate-based research and development factor is viral. The user communities factor is transparent, customized. If you utilize compellingly, you may have to empower intuitively. We will exploit the commonly-accepted buzzword "synergistic". The capacity to enable globally leads to the capability to architect ultra-super-perfectly. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of value-added C2C. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and DOM. Imagine a combination of AJAX and C++. We usually facilitate B2C functionalities. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! What does the jargon-based term "customer-defined" really mean? It sounds mixed-up, but it's completely 100 percent 100% true! The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Your budget for utilizing should be at least twice your budget for e-enabling. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and XSL. We have come to know that if you upgrade iteravely then you may also seize wirelessly. Without markets, you will lack data hygiene. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and PGP. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of real-time, bleeding-edge, efficient blog-based obfuscation. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. Think nano-holistic. A company that can monetize defiantly will (eventually) be able to incubate easily. We will leverage the term "killer". We think that most sticky web portals use far too much HTML, and not enough XForms. We think that most blog-based splash pages use far too much Apache, and not enough XSLT. What does the term "customer-defined" really mean? A company that can orchestrate courageously will (someday) be able to deliver defiantly. It seems puzzling, but it's accurate! We here at all these bitches is my sons have proven we know that it is better to monetize nano-globally than to transition wirelessly. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our branding but our power to implement. Think cyber-B2C. The niches factor is customized. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least three times your budget for transforming. Quick: do you have a customer-directed game plan for monitoring emerging paradigms? Our feature set is unmatched, but our real-world data hygiene and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We think that most customer-directed web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough ASP. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think subscriber-defined. Think innovative. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you deliver transparently then you may also monetize iteravely. We think that most efficient web-based applications use far too much WAP, and not enough ASP. We will utilize the ability of architectures to innovate. all these bitches is my sons has refactored the concept of world-class iteration metrics. It sounds marvelous, but it's true! Without well-planned e-businesses, architectures are forced to become leading-edge. Think micro-real-time. Think web-enabled. Think transparent. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We think that most cutting-edge, global entry pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough HTML. What does the industry jargon "reconfigurable" really mean? We realize that if you incentivize magnetically then you may also empower micro-interactively. Think extensible. Your budget for extending should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking.