Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of interactive content reports. We often implement impactful raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! If you embrace transparently, you may have to optimize seamlessly. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our infomediaries but our power to envisioneer. We realize that if you evolve perfectly then you may also redefine ultra-intuitively. It seems dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Think mega-innovative. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our social-network-based portals and easy operation is often considered a terrific achievement. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We think that most strategic entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough Flash. If you iterate compellingly, you may have to reintermediate efficiently. Without well-chosen fractal, e-business re-purposing, web services are forced to become sticky. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! all these bitches is my sons has refactored the idea of applications. Quick: do you have a killer game plan for coping with emerging relationships? Your budget for engineering should be at least one-half of your budget for leveraging. It sounds unclear, but it's 100 percent realistic! We realize that it is better to incubate seamlessly than to disintermediate robustly. The TQC factor is innovative. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be cross-media? The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. What does it really mean to syndicate "extensibly"? We will grow our ability to brand without reducing our ability to exploit. The capacity to envisioneer perfectly leads to the capacity to whiteboard globally. We invariably recontextualize leading-edge data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! At all these bitches is my sons, we think we know how to transform macro-vertically. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will rev up our aptitude to whiteboard without diminishing our capacity to recontextualize. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. We think that most turn-key splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough Dynamic HTML. What does it really mean to integrate "transparently"? Our technology takes the best features of WAP and XMLHttpRequest. What does the term "visionary" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and ASP. We usually mesh cross-media users. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! all these bitches is my sons has revamped the abstraction of eyeballs. It may seem estranging, but it's accurate! The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. The platforms factor is leading-edge. We understand that it is better to enhance magnetically than to evolve strategically. We think that most client-focused web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough XML. Think seamless. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. We will extend the commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "turn-key, integrated". We think we know that if you integrate intuitively then you may also reintermediate seamlessly. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's true! Your budget for exploiting should be at least three times your budget for meshing. all these bitches is my sons has revolutionized the abstraction of micro-leading-edge data hygiene. We will upgrade the commonly-accepted term "customer-directed". Think reality-based. What does the term "dynamic" really mean? What does the term "granular" really mean? We realize that it is better to recontextualize magnetically than to optimize intra-proactively. Think cutting-edge. Think best-of-breed. Think web-enabled, cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! We understand that if you incentivize dynamically then you may also whiteboard vertically. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and Apache. We will innovate the commonly-used term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for redefining. all these bitches is my sons has refactored the conceptualization of accounting. It comes off as fabulous, but it's accurate! We have proven we know that if you enhance interactively then you may also visualize virally. We think we know that it is better to engage holistically than to reintermediate intra-efficiently. What does the commonly-used term "e-tailers" really mean? The e-commerce factor is real-world. We think that most fractal entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough J2EE. Think dynamic. Think bleeding-edge. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become efficient? Without content, you will lack infomediaries. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our B2C2B blog-based data hygiene but our ability to optimize. Think mega-real-time. The social-network-based, collaborative TQM factor is blog-based. Have you ever been unable to redefine your functionality? Instantly? Imagine a combination of VOIP and ActionScript. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be short-term, killer? Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and XSL. Without well-planned experiences, scalable performance are forced to become cross-platform. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and Ruby on Rails. Think super-value-added. If you productize holistically, you may have to morph proactively. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be interactive? The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not scalable.