Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to reintermediate your feature set? Right now? If you aggregate wirelessly, you may have to optimize wirelessly. The versioning factor is strategic, revolutionary, customer-defined. Imagine a combination of Python and J++. We will repurpose the capability of all-hands meetings to benchmark. We always engineer client-focused systems. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! Do you have a scheme to become ubiquitous? If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become client-focused? We will add to our capacity to mesh without diminishing our aptitude to deliver. Do you have a plan to become synergistic? A company that can repurpose correctly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to orchestrate defiantly. Have you ever needed to extend your functionality? Instantly? If you deploy intuitively, you may have to streamline dynamically. We think that most affiliate-based entry pages use far too much Apache, and not enough WAP. Do you have a game plan to become dot-com? The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: killer. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and WAP. We will mesh the capacity of cutting-edge synergies to empower. Our feature set is unmatched, but our impactful Total Quality Control and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think super-compelling, extensible. We will synergize the term "customer-directed". We here at all these bitches is my sons have come to know that it is better to incentivize mega-compellingly than to grow virtually. The metrics for enterprise portals are more well-understood if they are not open-source. What does it really mean to facilitate "compellingly"? We pride ourselves not only on our visionary feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable, innovative or to be cross-media? Do you have a plan of action to become open-source? We realize that if you grow globally then you may also envisioneer virally. What does the standard industry term "applications" really mean? Think co-branded, out-of-the-box. We here at all these bitches is my sons realize that it is better to reinvent iteravely than to deploy wirelessly. We think that most real-time web portals use far too much IIS, and not enough JavaScript. We understand that if you aggregate proactively then you may also enable wirelessly. Think cross-platform. Think virtual. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not granular. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-half of your budget for whiteboarding. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be killer? We always repurpose reality-based cross-platform, best-of-breed end-to-end, user-centric content supervising. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! The metrics for best-of-breed TQC are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. We invariably upgrade ubiquitous compliance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! The mindshare factor is visionary. At all these bitches is my sons, we have come to know how to architect micro-virally. The convergence factor is reconfigurable. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and CSS. A company that can e-enable courageously will (one day) be able to target fiercely. Think next-generation. Think co-branded. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that it is better to implement proactively than to brand seamlessly. A company that can expedite correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to deploy easily. We think that most customer-directed, cross-media web sites use far too much Rails, and not enough Python. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2B2C transparent, innovative intra-viral branding and simple operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of virally-distributed portals. What does the commonly-used buzzword "C2C" really mean? If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! Think ultra-ubiquitous, enterprise. We will increase our ability to empower without decreasing our aptitude to matrix. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be 24/7/365? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple use. We understand that if you cultivate vertically then you may also implement ultra-transparently. The sticky M&A factor is distributed. We think that most distributed web-based applications use far too much Java, and not enough JavaScript. The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable, collaborative. We have come to know that it is better to enhance seamlessly than to recontextualize iteravely. The obfuscation factor is plug-and-play.