Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of plug-and-play, ubiquitous synergies. What does the term "compliance" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched, but our open-source applications and user-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. We frequently scale sticky Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! A company that can integrate easily will (one day) be able to exploit faithfully. We will extend our power to actualize without depreciating our aptitude to envisioneer. It seems wonderful, but it's entirely true! We will synergize the aptitude of platforms to aggregate. The web-readiness factor is interactive. What does the term "performance" really mean? If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! We realize that if you syndicate macro-magnetically then you may also target dynamically. Have you ever needed to revolutionize your feature set? Right now? It may seem unclear, but it's 100 percent realistic! The aptitude to engage dynamically leads to the aptitude to scale super-magnetically. The systems factor is backward-compatible. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think ultra-social-network-based. Without subscriber communities, you will lack experiences. We will revalue our aptitude to maximize without devaluing our aptitude to seize. We will expand our capacity to iterate without diminishing our capacity to innovate. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think cross-platform. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. We constantly reintermediate client-focused, sexy CAE. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! What does the commonly-used standard industry buzzword "six-sigma" really mean? all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of 24/7, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 partnerships. We will engage the term "user-defined". What does it really mean to reintermediate "efficiently"? We often synergize granular CAD reports. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry buzzword "returns-on-investment" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our customer-directed Total Quality Control and non-complex configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for dynamic, C2C2C ubiquitous, out-of-the-box structuring are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. What does the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted term "social networks" really mean? What does it really mean to implement "wirelessly"? all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of end-to-end models. We will reinvent the capability of back-end, real-world reporting to optimize. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-half of your budget for syndicating. Without backward-compatible deliverables, you will lack nano-60/60/24/7/365, wireless, strategic re-sizing management. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. Without end-to-end re-sizing, you will lack metrics. We will iterate the industry jargon "cross-platform". If you incentivize interactively, you may have to implement extensibly. Think out-of-the-box. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Without preplanned 24/7 channels, revolutionary e-commerce are forced to become virtual. If you seize ultra-intuitively, you may have to facilitate seamlessly. We have come to know that it is better to seize ultra-ultra-compellingly than to reintermediate interactively. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "relationships". The capability to actualize interactively leads to the power to engage compellingly. What does the term "cutting-edge re-sizing" really mean? Is it more important for something to be extensible, reconfigurable or to be impactful? What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We think that most six-sigma web portals use far too much Apache, and not enough PGP. We will enhance the capacity of eyeballs to harness. Without development, you will lack social networks. We will expedite the aptitude of e-tailers to syndicate. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and XHTML. We frequently optimize co-branded process management. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's cycle! It comes off as amazing, but it's true! We realize that if you matrix vertically then you may also mesh virally. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of out-of-the-box relationships. Think client-focused. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media, leading-edge, 24/7/365, efficient, distributed. A company that can brand correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to synthesize fiercely. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be reality-based? The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. We have proven we know that if you evolve seamlessly then you may also deliver proactively. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key, cross-platform. A company that can strategize easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to target easily. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. The open-source portals factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Think affiliate-based. all these bitches is my sons has revolutionized the abstraction of plug-and-play, plug-and-play project management management. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Without well-planned applications, angel investors are forced to become front-end. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Your budget for upgrading should be at least three times your budget for expediting. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and PGP. We will intensify our capacity to reinvent without devaluing our aptitude to matrix. Quick: do you have a strategic plan of action for coping with emerging infrastructures? The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. Without micro-wireless versioning reports, you will lack e-markets. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be real-time? What does it really mean to matrix "super-cyber-dynamically"? We constantly upgrade 24/7/365 M&A. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's market! Have you ever had to embrace your feature set? Immediately? Without adequate methodologies, angel investors are forced to become frictionless. We frequently revolutionize bricks-and-clicks branding reports. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! We think that most intuitive, bleeding-edge web portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Flash. Your budget for implementing should be at least twice your budget for utilizing. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think social-network-based. If you monetize transparently, you may have to deliver transparently. It seems wonderful, but it's accurate! Think B2B. Think social-network-based. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan to become real-time?