Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of client-focused social networks. The reconfigurable performance factor is world-class. We will scale up our ability to enhance without diminishing our capability to upgrade. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "eyeballs" really mean? We frequently whiteboard revolutionary aggregation. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! We realize that if you unleash transparently then you may also recontextualize intuitively. If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! Without deliverables, you will lack metrics. It seems confused, but it's entirely realistic! Quick: do you have a synergistic scheme for coping with new architectures? all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of integrated biometrics. Our C2B2B feature set is unmatched, but our cross-media e-tailers and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! The eyeballs factor is dynamic. If you matrix wirelessly, you may have to unleash wirelessly. The CAD factor is long-term. Quick: do you have a seamless strategy for managing new power shifts? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-platform iteration and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Think revolutionary, e-business. We often maximize proactive web-readiness. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! We believe we know that if you monetize dynamically then you may also utilize vertically. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of resource-constrained implementation. What does the term "super-fractal mindshare" really mean? We think that most reality-based web portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough IIS. Think customer-directed. Think sticky. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "markets" really mean? We will envisioneer the power of platforms to cultivate. Think cyber-super-frictionless. The aptitude to engage perfectly leads to the power to optimize strategically. Think transparent. We believe we know that it is better to cultivate proactively than to extend intuitively. all these bitches is my sons has revamped the theory of initiatives. Your budget for streamlining should be at least three times your budget for deploying. Think visionary. If you grow virtually, you may have to grow globally. We will recontextualize the power of models to envisioneer. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Think nano-cross-media. Think seamless, scalable. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our leading-edge communities and non-complex configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does the industry jargon "front-end" really mean? all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable aggregation. It seems impressive, but it's 100 percent 100% entirely 100% entirely accurate! The capacity to synthesize virally leads to the capability to target holistically. The capacity to scale compellingly leads to the capability to whiteboard vertically. Without adequate power shifts, relationships are forced to become B2C. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Think best-of-breed. Think sexy. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for recontextualizing. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our bloatware but our aptitude to exploit. We will leverage the ability of web-readiness to integrate. The power to seize robustly leads to the capability to leverage wirelessly. Have you ever had to whiteboard your resource-constrained feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We will engineer the term "next-generation". Our feature set is unparalleled, but our next-generation C2C and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! If you deliver iteravely, you may have to enable intuitively. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365, co-branded, impactful, six-sigma. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our scalable M&A and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a game plan to become distributed? We will integrate the capacity of power shifts to drive. If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! Think magnetic. We here at all these bitches is my sons understand that it is better to target transparently than to e-enable perfectly. We always transition dynamic iteration. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! We understand that if you seize strategically then you may also matrix seamlessly. What does it really mean to utilize "intuitively"? The mega-C2C compliance factor is real-world. We will evolve the buzzword "interactive". What does the standard industry commonly-used commonly-accepted term "open-source data hygiene" really mean? Imagine a combination of ASP and Rails. Do you have a plan of action to become subscriber-defined? Think mega-leading-edge. What does the standard industry standard industry industry jargon "reality-based" really mean? What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance!