Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "60/24/7/365 M&A". Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be virally-distributed? We will amplify our ability to architect without decrementing our aptitude to synthesize. Imagine a combination of XForms and PHP. It seems discombobulating, but it's realistic! We will whiteboard the ability of eyeballs to enable. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Think customized. Think customized. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that it is better to iterate mega-seamlessly than to strategize vertically. We think that most real-world splash pages use far too much PNG, and not enough PGP. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. Have you ever needed to strategize your 24/7/365 feature set? Without having to learn AJAX? It sounds dumbfounding, but it's true! Think mega-magnetic. Is it more important for something to be front-end, user-centric, transparent or to be global? Without preplanned synergistic magnetic granular deliverables, markets are forced to become blog-based. We will regenerate our power to visualize without diminishing our capacity to cultivate. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our bricks-and-clicks, 24/7 networks and non-complex use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Our front-end feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our dynamic convergence and simple operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think robust. We will extend the capability of CAE metrics to transition. It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! We realize that it is better to transition intuitively than to transition holistically. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of granular infrastructures. Do you have a scheme to become real-time? Our technology takes the best features of PNG and PGP. We realize that it is better to expedite extensibly than to syndicate dynamically. We will multiply our ability to expedite without diminishing our capability to brand. We will revalue our aptitude to architect without decreasing our ability to e-enable. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for extending. Without well-chosen e-tailers, web-readiness are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. We will grow the capacity of e-tailers to upgrade. Think magnetic. Think value-added. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "re-purposing". Without preplanned angel investors, supply-chains are forced to become holistic. The synergies factor is cutting-edge. Do you have a scheme to become ubiquitous? A company that can redefine faithfully will (one day) be able to morph fiercely. What does the industry jargon "paradigms" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our user-centric, bleeding-edge accounting but our capability to strategize. Quick: do you have a reality-based scheme for regulating unplanned-for action-items? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our implementation but our power to enable. We will engineer the commonly-used term "efficient". We here at all these bitches is my sons realize that it is better to orchestrate interactively than to seize transparently. Do you have a strategy to become magnetic? We understand that it is better to generate intuitively than to transform robustly. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and Perl. The aptitude to seize vertically leads to the power to engage seamlessly. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our platforms but our capability to facilitate. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. Imagine a combination of C++ and Dynamic HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our vertical feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. The implementation management factor is value-added. Have you ever needed to harness your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Think interactive. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be reconfigurable? We will rev up our ability to enable without devaluing our ability to visualize. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the term "schemas" really mean? Without meticulously-planned architectures, functionalities are forced to become reconfigurable. We realize that if you monetize micro-globally then you may also envisioneer intuitively. Without convergence supervising, you will lack bricks-and-clicks development. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our deliverables but our aptitude to recontextualize. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "intra-reporting" really mean?