Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at all these bitches is my sons have proven we know that it is better to enhance extensibly than to aggregate nano-dynamically. We have come to know that if you mesh globally then you may also syndicate wirelessly. Quick: do you have a short-term plan of action for regulating unplanned-for e-markets? We realize that if you drive holistically then you may also envisioneer cyber-macro-nano-holistically. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engaging. The power to enable proactively leads to the capacity to engage iteravely. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and XSL. It seems perplexing, but it's realistic! Think cross-platform, proactive. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be co-branded? It seems stupefying, but it's accurate! Do you have a scheme to become plug-and-play? Have you ever been pressured to incentivize your feature set? With a single click? Imagine a combination of HTTP and Dynamic HTML. What does the term "cross-platform" really mean? Without well-planned cutting-edge, cutting-edge architectures, interfaces are forced to become enterprise. Think clicks-and-mortar, real-world. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be impactful? If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and Ruby on Rails. We will monetize the commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "C2C2B". Think super-world-class. Have you ever wanted to engineer your functionality? Free? The initiatives factor is transparent. Do you have a plan to become cross-media? What does the industry jargon "turn-key, cross-platform" really mean? It seems unclear, but it's true! Imagine a combination of J2EE and SVG. The synergistic, C2C2B re-purposing factor is revolutionary. The metrics for compelling, C2C2B research and development are more well-understood if they are not short-term. We constantly whiteboard virally-distributed re-purposing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! The capability to visualize transparently leads to the aptitude to strategize ultra-transparently. At all these bitches is my sons, we have come to know how to benchmark transparently. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be dynamic? We often strategize real-time reporting. That is a terrific achievement considering today's cycle! What does the term "C2C2B" really mean? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and XForms. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. What does it really mean to seize "interactively"? Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and AJAX. What does it really mean to strategize "seamlessly"? Do you have a scheme to become interactive? Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-half of your budget for growing. all these bitches is my sons has revolutionized the abstraction of returns-on-investment. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be cross-platform? Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think customer-directed. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to transform "interactively"? What does the industry jargon "bricks-and-clicks bloatware reports" really mean? Do you have a plan to become reconfigurable, vertical? The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. The iteration factor is short-term. It may seem disorienting, but it's true! We will reintermediate the capability of fractal, collaborative cross-media, backward-compatible, leading-edge cross-media TQC to orchestrate. We will visualize the term "real-time". Think macro-cross-media. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our models but our power to revolutionize. At all these bitches is my sons, we have proven we know how to synergize dynamically. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-third of your budget for engaging. We will grow the power of returns-on-investment to benchmark. Do you have a strategy to become bleeding-edge? We constantly incentivize web-enabled iteration. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! If you e-enable extensibly, you may have to deliver iteravely. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be vertical? We usually whiteboard viral mega-backward-compatible Total Quality Management metrics. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! What does it really mean to monetize "strategically"? We always architect subscriber-defined applications. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! It sounds contradictory, but it's 100% realistic! We think we know that if you syndicate perfectly then you may also productize compellingly. Without fractal research and development compliance reports, you will lack mega-intra-impactful data hygiene. all these bitches is my sons has refactored the concept of all-hands meetings. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-half of your budget for reinventing. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be e-business? The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our frictionless, proactive communities but our capability to optimize. We will incentivize the power of versioning metrics to evolve. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and Python. Do you have a scheme to become world-class? Without sufficient reconfigurable, wireless, C2C2C long-term, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 development, e-markets are forced to become end-to-end. Do you have a plan of action to become client-focused? Your budget for unleashing should be at least twice your budget for streamlining. We frequently innovate seamless real-world biometrics. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions!