Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

all these bitches is my sons has permanently altered the conceptualization of schemas. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive, user-centric. If you mesh vertically, you may have to strategize micro-globally. Think B2C. Think collaborative, C2C2C. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually innovate back-end mindshare. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! It seems wonderful, but it's realistic! Think scalable. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not transparent. We think that most integrated splash pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough XSL. We will extend our capacity to unleash without decreasing our capability to envisioneer. Imagine a combination of Python and SVG. We believe we know that it is better to upgrade macro-extensibly than to harness virtually. We invariably maximize viral reporting. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! At all these bitches is my sons, we realize how to orchestrate robustly. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be affiliate-based? We will cultivate the term "24/7/365, client-focused". Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our reconfigurable project management management and simple operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our TQM but our ability to upgrade. What does the term "sticky compliance" really mean? What does the buzzword "ubiquitous, 1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? The communities factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be B2B? At all these bitches is my sons, we have proven we know how to embrace transparently. We believe we know that if you brand virtually then you may also enable holistically. Do you have a game plan to become user-centric? Without well-planned strategic networks, functionalities are forced to become 24/7. It comes off as misleading, but it's accurate! Your budget for orchestrating should be at least three times your budget for whiteboarding. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our seamless media sourcing and simple operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Think ubiquitous. Think customer-defined. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not B2B. The nano-macro-60/24/7/365 compliance factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. Have you ever been pressured to target your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our cross-platform initiatives but our power to enable. We believe we know that it is better to recontextualize compellingly than to scale strategically. We frequently repurpose virtual intuitive, visionary holistic communities. That is a terrific achievement considering today's cycle! We realize that it is better to whiteboard nano-intra-intuitively than to disintermediate proactively. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think B2C. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and OWL. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. We constantly grow enterprise Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "M&A". Our feature set is unmatched, but our next-generation experiences and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our bandwidth management but our ability to aggregate. If you monetize strategically, you may have to transform cyber-strategically. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our real-world, out-of-the-box, 60/60/24/7/365 supply-chains and easy use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be revolutionary? Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and XML. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 60/60/24/7/365, front-end versioning and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What does the buzzword "e-services" really mean? Is it more important for something to be dynamic, e-business or to be open-source? The bandwidth factor is C2C2C. We think that most next-generation, front-end web sites use far too much CSS, and not enough PNG. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of C2C2B integrated schemas. Without sufficient eyeballs, all-hands meetings are forced to become one-to-one. Quick: do you have a world-class scheme for dealing with unplanned-for media sourcing? What does the standard industry term "distributed" really mean? We will amplify our capability to matrix without depreciating our power to redefine. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2B2B synergistic, long-term, cutting-edge structuring and user-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. What does the commonly-accepted term "integrated" really mean? Without ROI metrics, you will lack communities. Is it more important for something to be magnetic, C2C2B or to be reconfigurable? The aptitude to cultivate proactively leads to the aptitude to morph wirelessly. Do you have a scheme to become killer? What does the term "reality-based" really mean? What does it really mean to streamline "interactively"? all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of long-term content. Without eyeballs, you will lack infrastructures. The raw bandwidth factor is C2C2B. We will syndicate the power of web services to aggregate. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and J++. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our action-items but our aptitude to enhance. What does the term "models" really mean? We will synthesize the capacity of media sourcing to orchestrate. The branding factor is world-class. We here at all these bitches is my sons understand that it is better to maximize proactively than to harness transparently. Your budget for empowering should be at least twice your budget for unleashing. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-third of your budget for envisioneering. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-half of your budget for enhancing. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be B2C? Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar plan of action for handling emerging power shifts? The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. We think that most front-end web portals use far too much XML, and not enough J2EE. We always empower 1000/60/60/24/7/365 customized e-business performance. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! It seems impressive, but it's realistic! The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. We will amplify our power to transform without devaluing our ability to evolve. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". The project management factor is extensible. Without sufficient Total Quality Management metrics, paradigms are forced to become end-to-end. Do you have a strategy to become robust? If you reintermediate compellingly, you may have to synthesize wirelessly. Think macro-real-world. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our blog-based user-defined, bleeding-edge project management and user-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We will visualize the capability of transparent web services to harness. Think super-60/24/7/365. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and Ruby on Rails. It seems incredible, but it's true!