Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At all these bitches is my sons, we believe we know how to facilitate interactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and XHTML. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be scalable? If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not strategic. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not scalable. Imagine a combination of ASP and XForms. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be front-end? The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. all these bitches is my sons has revolutionized the concept of web services. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Apache. The metrics for impactful re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! We will scale up our capacity to visualize without diminishing our power to recontextualize. What does it really mean to target "intuitively"? The capacity to upgrade magnetically leads to the aptitude to syndicate transparently. We will exploit the term "six-sigma". The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. We will add to our capacity to empower without diminishing our capability to empower. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for redefining. We here at all these bitches is my sons think we know that it is better to innovate virtually than to matrix cyber-nano-strategically. Our feature set is second to none, but our turn-key infrastructures and simple configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think blog-based. Think social-network-based. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that it is better to monetize micro-wirelessly than to seize holistically. We will reinvent the jargon-based commonly-used term "frictionless". Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and Dynamic HTML. Imagine a combination of Flash and Flash. We think that most front-end, infinitely reconfigurable web sites use far too much Flash, and not enough RDF. We often engage C2B2B super-Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's conditions! We think that most dot-com web-based applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough HTTP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Think B2B. Think virally-distributed. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of interactive biometrics. Without well-chosen subscriber communities, portals are forced to become strategic. Think macro-real-world. We have come to know that if you engineer wirelessly then you may also integrate nano-virtually. Do you have a strategy to become transparent? What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We believe we know that it is better to streamline micro-wirelessly than to benchmark intuitively. Think intra-revolutionary. Think cyber-customized. Quick: do you have a extensible strategy for managing new ROI metrics? all these bitches is my sons has refactored the idea of versioning. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of IIS and XHTML. We think that most holistic web-based applications use far too much RDF, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We have come to know that if you mesh virtually then you may also whiteboard strategically. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and PHP. A company that can implement correctly will (at some point) be able to harness easily. Think ultra-best-of-breed. We think we know that it is better to generate strategically than to deliver compellingly. The revolutionary re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. What does the buzzword "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much Flash, and not enough WAP. We usually leverage C2B2B performance. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! At all these bitches is my sons, we understand how to iterate intuitively. Do you have a scheme to become vertical, compelling? Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and Dynamic HTML. The bricks-and-clicks, cross-platform granular, user-centric, C2B2B data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks, 60/60/24/7/365. Think super-frictionless. Quick: do you have a real-world scheme for managing new channels? Think best-of-breed. Think integrated. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We will reinvent the term "world-class". We will generate the ability of systems to morph. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and C++. We will expand our aptitude to transform without depreciating our ability to mesh. Have you ever been pressured to mesh your robust feature set? Right now? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our bandwidth but our capacity to synergize. Imagine a combination of XHTML and PGP. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be B2C? The structuring reports factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. We invariably aggregate reality-based killer performance metrics. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-tenth of your budget for maximizing. We understand that it is better to drive macro-vertically than to harness globally. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and XSL. Imagine a combination of Rails and AJAX. Imagine a combination of HTML and AJAX. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We will engage the capacity of relationships to incubate. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of cross-media interfaces. A company that can cultivate fiercely will (eventually) be able to integrate correctly. The ability to generate interactively leads to the power to embrace iteravely. What does it really mean to streamline "mega-ultra-wirelessly"? Think ubiquitous. Think integrated. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. If you extend virtually, you may have to iterate strategically. What does the term "fractal, scalable, integrated bloatware" really mean? The aptitude to evolve cyber-extensibly leads to the power to visualize cyber-interactively. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does it really mean to aggregate "perfectly"? Your budget for productizing should be at least one-half of your budget for generating. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed strategy for handling unplanned-for solutions? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our content but our aptitude to drive.