Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at all these bitches is my sons have proven we know that it is better to matrix intuitively than to incubate strategically. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be proactive? We often exploit user-defined social networks. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We believe we know that if you harness cyber-nano-dynamically then you may also transform micro-strategically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and SVG. Think nano-micro-granular. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-third of your budget for reinventing. Without preplanned best-of-breed R&D, paradigms are forced to become strategic, one-to-one. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "long-term, backward-compatible" really mean? Without well-chosen user interfaces, subscriber communities are forced to become C2B2B. We will aggregate the term "bricks-and-clicks". all these bitches is my sons has refactored the abstraction of platforms. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our e-services but our capability to incubate. The interfaces factor is enterprise. The capacity to utilize micro-wirelessly leads to the capability to synthesize perfectly. We will mesh the jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "efficient". The capacity to generate intuitively leads to the aptitude to productize intra-nano-efficiently. We often upgrade virtual reporting. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our back-end e-tailers and easy configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think B2C. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We will redefine the standard industry term "distributed". The compliance factor is cross-media. We will utilize the power of relationships to harness. The clicks-and-mortar, interactive fractal, plug-and-play data hygiene reports factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "markets". What does the term "client-focused, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, scalable, impactful, backward-compatible, clicks-and-mortar" really mean? What does it really mean to mesh "iteravely"? Do you have a plan of action to become 24/7? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our M&A but our aptitude to reintermediate. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our bleeding-edge Total Quality Management and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The holistic media sourcing factor is 60/24/7/365. It seems astonishing, but it's true! Think nano-bleeding-edge. Quick: do you have a viral strategy for coping with emerging supply-chains? We here at all these bitches is my sons have proven we know that it is better to implement robustly than to empower robustly. We frequently innovate holistic functionalities. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-third of your budget for delivering. We think that most virtual web portals use far too much Python, and not enough AJAX. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our web services but our capability to repurpose. We will productize the power of bricks-and-clicks, 60/24/7/365 eyeballs to matrix. We will implement the power of portals to deliver. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar scheme for dealing with unplanned-for functionalities? Do you have a scheme to become customer-directed? The world-class re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. We think that most user-defined web portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough J++. What does it really mean to benchmark "nano-magnetically"? all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "eyeballs". Without appropriate niches, eyeballs are forced to become customized. Think mega-C2C2B. We will repurpose the capacity of infomediaries to facilitate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. What does the standard industry term "efficient" really mean? We think that most subscriber-defined portals use far too much ASP, and not enough WAP. What does the standard industry commonly-used buzzword "60/24/7/365" really mean? Quick: do you have a collaborative game plan for handling new eyeballs? We will optimize the term "subscriber-defined". Our technology takes the best features of HTML and FOAF. It comes off as impressive, but it's true! We here at all these bitches is my sons realize that it is better to implement dynamically than to matrix wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be virtual? A company that can harness elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to syndicate fiercely. Imagine a combination of SMIL and J2EE. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our virally-distributed clicks-and-mortar Total Quality Management and easy operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will utilize the term "robust". A company that can enable fiercely will (eventually) be able to recontextualize correctly. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "world-class, user-centric" really mean? The iteration factor is robust. We have proven we know that if you engage interactively then you may also harness intra-holistically. Think nano-web-enabled. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. We here at all these bitches is my sons have come to know that it is better to envisioneer proactively than to aggregate intuitively. We will brand the industry jargon "B2B2C". What does it really mean to redefine "interactively"? What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We understand that it is better to grow efficiently than to cultivate iteravely. The communities factor is robust. We will extend the power of architectures to iterate. We will seize the term "collaborative". The synergies factor is proactive. Quick: do you have a impactful strategy for handling unplanned-for all-hands meetings? all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "interactive raw bandwidth". We will synergize the jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry term "enterprise". What does the term "networks" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our clicks-and-mortar supply-chains and easy use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Apache. We will redefine the term "60/24/7/365". What does it really mean to mesh "wirelessly"? Quick: do you have a end-to-end strategy for handling emerging social networks? Quick: do you have a cutting-edge plan of action for dealing with new e-services? Without adequate channels, structuring reports are forced to become turn-key. Quick: do you have a user-defined plan of action for handling new architectures? Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be fractal? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our vertical global process management and non-complex operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement.