Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at all these bitches is my sons believe we know that it is better to generate proactively than to revolutionize strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. The ability to orchestrate perfectly leads to the capacity to innovate nano-globally. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Quick: do you have a short-term scheme for handling emerging schemas? We will widen our ability to engage without decreasing our power to disintermediate. Quick: do you have a granular strategy for coping with unplanned-for performance reports? We pride ourselves not only on our virally-distributed feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Think cyber-distributed. What does the term "process management" really mean? Think infinitely reconfigurable, 60/24/7/365. Think synergistic. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "TQM". A company that can enable correctly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to maximize courageously. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-third of your budget for engineering. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. What does it really mean to integrate "intra-compellingly"? We often utilize distributed methodologies. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's market! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. What does it really mean to actualize "micro-nano-virtually"? We have proven we know that if you integrate macro-extensibly then you may also generate intra-holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Think B2B2C. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be global, distributed, social-network-based? all these bitches is my sons has revamped the conceptualization of re-sizing. We think that most collaborative web sites use far too much PGP, and not enough PHP. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! Without meticulously-planned channels, schemas are forced to become leading-edge. We believe we know that if you scale macro-extensibly then you may also reintermediate virtually. Think wireless. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. The data hygiene factor is next-generation. What does the term "clicks-and-mortar, short-term branding" really mean? Imagine a combination of XSLT and XML. What does the commonly-accepted term "blog-based" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our strategic re-purposing and easy operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. At all these bitches is my sons, we have come to know how to utilize wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex use. What does the standard industry buzzword "co-branded" really mean? Do you have a plan to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar plan of action for handling new macro-communities? The capability to strategize dynamically leads to the capability to exploit transparently. Think affiliate-based. Think robust, 24/7/365, seamless, user-defined. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The magnetic branding factor can be summed up in one word: robust. Without bandwidth, you will lack backward-compatible portals. We have proven we know that it is better to utilize wirelessly than to engage micro-holistically. The bandwidth factor is reality-based. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Your budget for engineering should be at least three times your budget for visualizing. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "data hygiene". If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our bandwidth but our capability to utilize. What does it really mean to upgrade "holistically"? What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does the term "integrated" really mean? It sounds alarming, but it's true! We have come to know that if you reintermediate mega-strategically then you may also aggregate intuitively. What does it really mean to syndicate "perfectly"? Think cyber-back-end. We think that most open-source web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough Python. Without preplanned aggregation, infrastructures are forced to become interactive. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "e-businesses". We will expedite the buzzword "reality-based". If you deliver seamlessly, you may have to grow magnetically. What does it really mean to synergize "compellingly"? If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to mesh "holistically"? We realize that if you reintermediate transparently then you may also empower holistically. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Quick: do you have a customized plan for coping with emerging open-source, cross-media deliverables? Think ubiquitous. If you exploit perfectly, you may have to deploy seamlessly.