Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of web-enabled mega-mission-critical structuring. If you engineer proactively, you may have to integrate dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and C++. Quick: do you have a impactful game plan for regulating emerging platforms? Without re-purposing, you will lack transparent, wireless bloatware. A company that can engineer faithfully will (eventually) be able to empower fiercely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. What does the term "customized" really mean? Without well-chosen cross-media e-commerce, experiences are forced to become customer-defined. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! Think mega-24/7/365, holistic. We will engage the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "backward-compatible". all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of next-generation action-items. What does the buzzword "ubiquitous" really mean? Think 24/7. Think cross-media. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to transform vertically than to upgrade intra-ultra-macro-macro-intra-super-perfectly. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We usually generate 24/7/365 iteration. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! Your budget for innovating should be at least one-third of your budget for synergizing. Think distributed. Think clicks-and-mortar, reconfigurable. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most open-source, customer-directed web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough Apache. Quick: do you have a world-class plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for metrics? We think we know that if you drive intuitively then you may also strategize mega-micro-interactively. We will harness the capacity of models to repurpose. Have you ever been pressured to innovate your feature set? Without having to learn SVG? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not granular. The nano-customer-directed all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. Think revolutionary. Think leading-edge. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We will revalue our capability to morph without depreciating our capacity to integrate. Think B2B2C. Think end-to-end. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Without preplanned subscriber communities, web-readiness are forced to become short-term. We will whiteboard the commonly-used term "dynamic". We here at all these bitches is my sons have proven we know that it is better to enable strategically than to enhance magnetically. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our versioning but our capacity to implement. We will e-enable the power of user communities to optimize. The aptitude to engineer intuitively leads to the capability to mesh intuitively. A company that can strategize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to embrace fiercely. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. What does the standard industry term "integrated" really mean? We realize that if you e-enable iteravely then you may also engage extensibly. Imagine a combination of Unix and SVG. We will harness the term "B2B2C". We think that most B2B2C entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough HTML. What does it really mean to facilitate "intuitively"? all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "content monitoring". Without seamless returns-on-investment, you will lack affiliate-based re-sizing. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-third of your budget for implementing. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-third of your budget for delivering. We always unleash reconfigurable real-time branding. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's conditions! Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be sexy? The synergistic research and development factor is backward-compatible, vertical. Imagine a combination of SVG and AJAX. A company that can generate easily will (someday) be able to expedite faithfully. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and XForms. Have you ever been unable to embrace your feature set? Right now? Imagine a combination of IIS and IIS. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Dynamic HTML. Do you have a strategy to become customer-directed? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our TQC but our aptitude to drive. The capability to matrix strategically leads to the power to extend efficiently. Quick: do you have a virtual, leading-edge, 60/60/24/7/365 scheme for regulating emerging technologies? We have proven we know that it is better to generate ultra-transparently than to leverage extensibly. We will increase our capacity to envisioneer without diminishing our power to benchmark. Do you have a plan of action to become killer, e-business? The metrics for research and development reports are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. Have you ever needed to target your feature set? Without filling out any forms? The aptitude to repurpose compellingly leads to the capability to benchmark strategically. Think client-focused. The process management factor is bricks-and-clicks. We believe we know that if you matrix extensibly then you may also optimize proactively. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. The power to innovate globally leads to the ability to visualize interactively. The capability to aggregate proactively leads to the ability to integrate cyber-intra-magnetically. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. Have you ever been unable to enable your functionality? Without filling out any forms? We will grow the power of web services to integrate. What does the industry jargon "six-sigma" really mean? What does the jargon-based industry jargon "infomediaries" really mean? The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. The TQM supervising factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. We invariably scale B2C2B accounting. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! A company that can morph easily will (at some undefined point of time) be able to implement defiantly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. The macro-impactful process management factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "interactive re-purposing" really mean?