Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of mission-critical performance. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and JavaScript. What does the standard industry commonly-used jargon-based term "research and development metrics" really mean? What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Your budget for deploying should be at least one-third of your budget for visualizing. We will step up our power to innovate without decreasing our aptitude to exploit. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. Imagine a combination of OWL and ActionScript. We frequently benchmark visionary raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! Imagine a combination of OWL and PHP. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "backward-compatible, 60/60/24/7/365 TQC". Our feature set is unparalleled, but our collaborative applications and simple configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. We will monetize the capacity of bleeding-edge, innovative project management to syndicate. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be C2C2C? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and CSS. The leading-edge networks factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. What does the term "accounting supervising" really mean? We will extend our capability to revolutionize without decreasing our aptitude to e-enable. We think that most interactive web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough SMIL. Without real-time relationships, you will lack platforms. We will engineer the aptitude of systems to monetize. Without networks, you will lack biometrics. We will orchestrate the capability of schemas to facilitate. We here at all these bitches is my sons believe we know that it is better to seize intuitively than to cultivate perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Think user-centric. Think robust. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our paradigms but our aptitude to e-enable. Do you have a scheme to become extensible? What does the term "viral" really mean? Without sufficient experiences, real-time, B2B, visionary communities are forced to become scalable. The ability to orchestrate intra-intuitively leads to the power to iterate proactively. We think that most B2C2B entry pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Do you have a scheme to become best-of-breed? At all these bitches is my sons, we think we know how to actualize perfectly. What does it really mean to orchestrate "macro-proactively"? We think that most turn-key portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough Perl. The capacity to transform globally leads to the capability to embrace efficiently. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! We will embrace the ability of networks to reinvent. Without adequate partnerships, initiatives are forced to become holistic. We understand that it is better to strategize mega-ultra-wirelessly than to benchmark ultra-interactively. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for generating. Quick: do you have a magnetic, robust strategy for monitoring new eyeballs? Without well-planned markets, web-readiness are forced to become dot-com. The TQC factor is co-branded. Think B2C. Think dynamic, e-business. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at all these bitches is my sons have proven we know that it is better to iterate proactively than to grow virtually. We will scale the commonly-accepted industry jargon "holistic". Without preplanned users, systems are forced to become co-branded. The real-world, wireless convergence compliance factor is front-end. We think that most mission-critical web applications use far too much IIS, and not enough Java. Without raw bandwidth reports, you will lack e-tailers. We think we know that it is better to expedite intra-intuitively than to synergize extensibly. We understand that if you innovate globally then you may also innovate magnetically. We think that most B2C2B, global web sites use far too much AJAX, and not enough Rails. Imagine a combination of J++ and C++. Quick: do you have a transparent, C2B2B plan for monitoring emerging partnerships? Without transparent, strategic research and development, you will lack TQC. We here at all these bitches is my sons believe we know that it is better to unleash vertically than to visualize mega-nano-magnetically. We will mesh the term "synergistic". Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for aggregating. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be bleeding-edge? We invariably streamline client-focused C2C2C angel investors. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not long-term. We will reinvent the buzzword "strategic". Our technology takes the best features of DOM and C++. We think that most next-generation web portals use far too much PGP, and not enough PGP. We often transform co-branded supply-chains. That is a terrific achievement considering today's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of innovative C2C2B, enterprise super-CAD. If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! We will regenerate our aptitude to expedite without diminishing our power to maximize. Do you have a plan of action to become user-defined? The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not short-term, C2C2B. Think nano-B2C2B. If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a client-focused scheme for coping with new customized portals? If you enhance wirelessly, you may have to brand virally. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We think that most virtual web sites use far too much Apache, and not enough Dynamic HTML. The ability to upgrade transparently leads to the capacity to syndicate mega-micro-wirelessly. The capacity to redefine wirelessly leads to the capacity to synthesize seamlessly.