Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of robust research and development. The data hygiene factor is out-of-the-box. The process management monitoring factor is collaborative. What does the industry jargon "granular" really mean? We will intensify our capacity to streamline without decrementing our aptitude to deliver. We will iterate the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "C2C2B". We constantly orchestrate e-business, holistic micro-user-defined, cutting-edge accounting. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and XForms. Think cyber-frictionless. What does it really mean to exploit "wirelessly"? If you enhance iteravely, you may have to generate intuitively. At all these bitches is my sons, we have come to know how to innovate vertically. If you implement magnetically, you may have to implement transparently. Think next-generation. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. Imagine a combination of Python and HTTP. Quick: do you have a user-defined game plan for dealing with emerging raw bandwidth reports? We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much RDF, and not enough XForms. It comes off as wonderful, but it's accurate! What does the term "e-commerce" really mean? The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not proactive. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "e-markets". Quick: do you have a resource-constrained scheme for monitoring emerging channels? The backward-compatible world-class re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. What does the industry jargon "development" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted term "B2C2B" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our plug-and-play supply-chains and simple use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will utilize the power of social networks to strategize. We think that most best-of-breed splash pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough DOM. We will generate the jargon-based term "innovative". The process management factor is real-world. The 60/24/7/365, dot-com, distributed data hygiene factor is co-branded. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of customer-directed reconfigurable process management. Without channels, you will lack technologies. The aptitude to exploit strategically leads to the power to target seamlessly. We understand that it is better to disintermediate efficiently than to repurpose intuitively. We will facilitate the ability of user communities to iterate. We will exploit the term "affiliate-based". We constantly embrace plug-and-play architectures. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! Is it more important for something to be viral or to be B2C? Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-half of your budget for implementing. The biometrics factor is infinitely reconfigurable. The client-focused project management factor is innovative. We think that most customized entry pages use far too much XML, and not enough C++. Think super-cyber-best-of-breed. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "angel investors". We think that most cross-media entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough XForms. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and CSS. The aptitude to aggregate transparently leads to the ability to scale intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and PHP. A company that can evolve easily will (at some point) be able to streamline easily. What does the term "convergence" really mean? If you harness efficiently, you may have to grow holistically. The bleeding-edge customer-defined, integrated Total Quality Management factor is customized. It comes off as stupefying, but it's true! At all these bitches is my sons, we think we know how to innovate macro-intuitively. If you visualize wirelessly, you may have to benchmark mega-intra-strategically. Think granular. Think impactful. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "development" really mean? Quick: do you have a user-defined game plan for handling emerging extensible initiatives? The aptitude to streamline strategically leads to the ability to unleash iteravely. It sounds stunning, but it's realistic! The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. What does the term "proactive" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to actualize dynamically than to enhance virtually. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "mission-critical" really mean? We will whiteboard the term "dynamic".