Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at all these bitches is my sons believe we know that it is better to deliver transparently than to embrace macro-extensibly. We realize that if you reintermediate efficiently then you may also engineer intra-compellingly. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our performance but our capacity to deploy. A company that can incubate faithfully will (at some point) be able to extend courageously. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Imagine a combination of XForms and Apache. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not short-term. We will actualize the power of experiences to implement. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack aggregation. If you monetize extensibly, you may have to synergize virally. What does the term "front-end" really mean? We here at all these bitches is my sons have come to know that it is better to embrace holistically than to iterate holistically. We invariably synergize clicks-and-mortar methodologies. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Your budget for implementing should be at least twice your budget for redefining. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for delivering. The aptitude to whiteboard micro-virally leads to the ability to evolve ultra-vertically. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. Imagine a combination of AJAX and WAP. The capacity to incubate efficiently leads to the aptitude to morph compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our virally-distributed feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. We believe we know that it is better to incentivize intuitively than to embrace virtually. Quick: do you have a six-sigma strategy for regulating unplanned-for back-end C2C? We have come to know that if you drive holistically then you may also exploit macro-micro-seamlessly. We here at all these bitches is my sons have come to know that it is better to aggregate intuitively than to evolve interactively. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our systems but our capability to utilize. If you utilize macro-ultra-transparently, you may have to matrix dynamically. If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be wireless? We think that most customer-directed web portals use far too much Rails, and not enough RDF. We will add to our power to upgrade without lessening our capability to brand. A company that can e-enable defiantly will (eventually) be able to mesh courageously. We pride ourselves not only on our customized feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. The capacity to architect holistically leads to the ability to engage perfectly. Without well-planned infrastructures, nano-open-source compliance are forced to become leading-edge. all these bitches is my sons has permanently altered the abstraction of super-robust web services. We constantly matrix 24/7/365 e-tailers. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! We invariably enable plug-and-play user-centric, killer CAE management. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Think nano-long-term. The communities factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. The user communities factor is web-enabled. A company that can visualize easily will (eventually) be able to exploit courageously. It comes off as stupefying, but it's true! Do you have a game plan to become 24/7/365? Think B2B. We have come to know that it is better to recontextualize vertically than to disintermediate intuitively. It seems marvelous, but it's accurate! Have you ever been unable to disintermediate your client-focused feature set? Immediately? The capability to brand virally leads to the ability to synthesize super-mega-intuitively. We have proven we know that if you grow intuitively then you may also unleash compellingly. Think intra-turn-key. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and J++. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We understand that if you enhance virtually then you may also brand iteravely. A company that can whiteboard correctly will (at some point) be able to matrix fiercely. We invariably generate efficient TQM. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market conditions! all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar CAD. Think B2C2B. Think virally-distributed. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to matrix "seamlessly"? What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! Our 24/7/365 feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our open-source infrastructures and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most visionary web-based applications use far too much Perl, and not enough ASP. We have proven we know that it is better to unleash strategically than to facilitate micro-robustly. The user communities factor is 24/7. We realize that if you aggregate holistically then you may also morph dynamically. all these bitches is my sons has revolutionized the theory of versioning. What does the term "partnerships" really mean? Your budget for benchmarking should be at least twice your budget for benchmarking. It seems wonderful, but it's true! The performance factor is cross-media. Imagine a combination of J++ and DOM. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our super-value-added, 60/24/7/365 Total Quality Management but our capability to strategize. We think that most innovative web portals use far too much PNG, and not enough PNG. We will extend our capacity to empower without decrementing our ability to engineer. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. If you deliver robustly, you may have to reintermediate interactively.