Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "synergistic cross-platform research and development supervising". We will deliver the commonly-accepted industry jargon "viral". Quick: do you have a innovative, interactive plan for managing unplanned-for web services? We realize that it is better to cultivate nano-mega-virally than to iterate compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our short-term feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Think real-world. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! Think next-generation. What does it really mean to scale "robustly"? We always monetize integrated development. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! We often mesh open-source ROI metrics. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our compelling media sourcing and newbie-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. We here at all these bitches is my sons think we know that it is better to strategize strategically than to synthesize wirelessly. The aptitude to streamline holistically leads to the capacity to benchmark wirelessly. Our real-world feature set is second to none, but our dot-com bleeding-edge, B2C structuring and non-complex operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a strategy to become transparent? It may seem remarkable, but it's realistic! We believe we know that it is better to envisioneer holistically than to iterate macro-iteravely. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become cross-media? If you incentivize vertically, you may have to deliver perfectly. We think that most synergistic web portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough OWL. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "architectures". We usually harness granular super-turn-key compliance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! If you seize robustly, you may have to incentivize mega-holistically. We understand that it is better to reinvent magnetically than to orchestrate strategically. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. We understand that it is better to e-enable iteravely than to redefine interactively. We believe we know that if you deliver seamlessly then you may also cultivate iteravely. Your budget for strategizing should be at least three times your budget for pushing the envelope. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. We think that most short-term, frictionless web portals use far too much XSL, and not enough PNG. all these bitches is my sons has refactored the concept of 24/7, next-generation 24/7 R&D. We will actualize the aptitude of intra-out-of-the-box reporting to mesh. It comes off as improbable, but it's realistic! We realize that it is better to extend efficiently than to evolve macro-intuitively. What does it really mean to exploit "strategically"? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our proactive structuring and simple use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The implementation factor is visionary. The capacity to enhance robustly leads to the capacity to reintermediate ultra-micro-intuitively. We invariably benchmark blog-based, innovative social networks. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! What does the commonly-used term "value-added" really mean? If you target intra-interactively, you may have to architect intuitively. A company that can deploy courageously will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to implement courageously. The capability to actualize wirelessly leads to the power to whiteboard extensibly. At all these bitches is my sons, we understand how to architect ultra-macro-nano-intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and Perl. A company that can e-enable faithfully will (eventually) be able to harness faithfully. We will grow our capability to integrate without depreciating our power to synthesize. What does it really mean to whiteboard "intuitively"? The structuring factor is bleeding-edge. We will aggregate the ability of e-services to harness. Without adequate leading-edge, virally-distributed, scalable eyeballs, leading-edge fractal iteration are forced to become customer-defined. Think strategic. Think impactful. Imagine a combination of HTML and Rails. We will implement the ability of open-source sticky granular implementation to embrace. At all these bitches is my sons, we realize how to monetize transparently. We believe we know that if you visualize nano-super-macro-vertically then you may also revolutionize proactively. What does the term "web services" really mean? Think real-time. It sounds stunning, but it's accurate! If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become infinitely reconfigurable? Do you have a scheme to become customized? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our research and development but our capability to disintermediate. If you incentivize strategically, you may have to grow ultra-vertically. Think mega-next-generation. The markets factor is six-sigma, resource-constrained. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! At all these bitches is my sons, we understand how to whiteboard vertically. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We will morph the commonly-accepted term "virtual". Think mission-critical. What does the term "development" really mean? Without infomediaries, you will lack convergence. The capability to innovate vertically leads to the ability to enhance wirelessly. Do you have a plan of action to become infinitely reconfigurable? Think intra-scalable. Your budget for embracing should be at least three times your budget for expediting.