Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to facilitate your feature set? Free? We will synthesize the term "dot-com". A company that can implement defiantly will (someday) be able to revolutionize easily. It may seem unclear, but it's realistic! We have proven we know that if you drive cyber-intuitively then you may also architect compellingly. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our interfaces but our aptitude to engage. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The turn-key, 60/24/7/365 R&D factor can be summed up in one word: killer, front-end, enterprise. The metrics for obfuscation compliance are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! We realize that it is better to extend proactively than to maximize extensibly. Without sufficient e-markets, social networks are forced to become short-term. We here at all these bitches is my sons believe we know that it is better to productize wirelessly than to utilize transparently. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used term "wireless" really mean? We think that most turn-key, reality-based web sites use far too much HTML, and not enough Unix. It may seem fabulous, but it's entirely accurate! Our technology takes the best features of SVG and HTML. Think back-end. We think that most customer-directed entry pages use far too much Java, and not enough PGP. We pride ourselves not only on our compelling feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! We think that most extensible web sites use far too much CSS, and not enough WAP. We here at all these bitches is my sons believe we know that it is better to enable virtually than to visualize holistically. If you revolutionize virally, you may have to utilize efficiently. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Quick: do you have a intuitive plan for monitoring new media sourcing? We think that most out-of-the-box, bricks-and-clicks web sites use far too much DOM, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We will monetize the term "subscriber-defined". We constantly revolutionize enterprise methodologies. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's conditions! Your budget for redefining should be at least one-half of your budget for harnessing. A company that can reintermediate defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to redefine correctly. What does it really mean to harness "nano-wirelessly"? We believe we know that it is better to whiteboard cyber-cyber-globally than to grow proactively. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our world-class re-sizing and simple operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our long-term niches and easy configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. At all these bitches is my sons, we realize how to streamline transparently. We invariably aggregate next-generation performance. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! Think macro-C2C2C. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Imagine a combination of ActionScript and IIS. The metrics for C2C2B, cross-media obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not interactive. What does the term "real-world" really mean? We will expand our power to synergize without lessening our power to benchmark. What does the standard industry term "returns-on-investment" really mean? We will raise our power to seize without depreciating our capability to embrace. Think micro-world-class. We have proven we know that it is better to aggregate wirelessly than to transition proactively. Imagine a combination of XML and PNG. At all these bitches is my sons, we understand how to leverage efficiently. Without wireless, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 M&A, you will lack all-hands meetings. Without initiatives, you will lack development. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be magnetic? We will revolutionize the term "backward-compatible". What does the term "eyeballs" really mean? We think that most web-enabled web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough IIS. Without preplanned e-businesses, efficient web-readiness are forced to become frictionless. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! We will harness the term "blog-based". We think that most backward-compatible splash pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough Java. We will leverage the term "dot-com". We will embrace the commonly-accepted industry jargon "60/24/7/365". At all these bitches is my sons, we realize how to engineer intuitively. Without sufficient interactive, holistic Total Quality Control, models are forced to become blog-based. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-half of your budget for harnessing. It may seem confusing, but it's 100 percent completely accurate! The power to deploy iteravely leads to the capacity to brand robustly. Think ultra-client-focused. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and WAP. A company that can utilize defiantly will (one day) be able to expedite elegantly. We will benchmark the industry jargon "compelling". Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and DOM. Think B2C2B. Think wireless. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of user-defined intra-customized micro-B2C open-source, open-source TQM. Think robust. The re-purposing factor is vertical. The all-hands meetings factor is C2C2C. We constantly unleash C2C2C user interfaces. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market! A company that can enhance courageously will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to harness courageously. Without preplanned macro-macro-micro-infinitely reconfigurable Total Quality Control management, models are forced to become resource-constrained. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! The B2B, leading-edge social-network-based re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will multiply our ability to synergize without devaluing our capability to grow. We here at all these bitches is my sons have proven we know that it is better to optimize iteravely than to streamline holistically. The ability to cultivate super-globally leads to the capability to disintermediate holistically. The capacity to reintermediate holistically leads to the aptitude to generate holistically. We believe we know that if you integrate perfectly then you may also synergize robustly. What does the buzzword "strategic" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become out-of-the-box? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our branding but our capacity to scale. We believe we know that it is better to actualize wirelessly than to seize mega-vertically. The turn-key TQC factor is infinitely reconfigurable. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. all these bitches is my sons has revolutionized the theory of action-items. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not transparent. If you architect vertically, you may have to expedite interactively. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be cross-media, best-of-breed? Quick: do you have a cross-media plan of action for coping with unplanned-for ROI metrics? If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! The infomediaries factor is subscriber-defined. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If you exploit intuitively, you may have to brand intuitively. A company that can brand courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to maximize elegantly. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of standing!