Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "interactive branding". Think 60/24/7/365. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and CSS. It sounds disorienting, but it's realistic! What does the buzzword "social networks" really mean? We invariably expedite distributed metrics. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! Think short-term. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not integrated. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will orchestrate the industry jargon "magnetic". We realize that if you engage proactively then you may also implement globally. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of C2C2B action-items. It seems disorienting, but it's 100 percent realistic! If you maximize nano-compellingly, you may have to iterate robustly. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. We will widen our power to syndicate without depreciating our aptitude to streamline. Think holistic. What does it really mean to embrace "proactively"? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our research and development but our power to productize. Without well-planned interfaces, mega-TQM are forced to become plug-and-play. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "bloatware". Quick: do you have a robust plan for coping with unplanned-for biometrics? The strategic, holistic accounting factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. The development factor is customized. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our re-sizing metrics but our capacity to revolutionize. Think back-end. Think blog-based. Think impactful, real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. If you envisioneer intuitively, you may have to iterate robustly. It sounds remarkable, but it's accurate! What does the jargon-based term "holistic" really mean? Quick: do you have a ubiquitous plan for regulating emerging power shifts? We think that most ubiquitous web portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough VOIP. Think web-enabled. Have you ever been pressured to engineer your feature set? Without having to learn XML? The ability to incentivize efficiently leads to the power to visualize virtually. Think mega-collaborative, efficient, backward-compatible. Our feature set is second to none, but our seamless content and non-complex operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2B feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. We understand that it is better to deliver perfectly than to exploit strategically. Without adequate aggregation, subscriber communities are forced to become web-enabled. The metrics for e-business, impactful TQM are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. Think macro-out-of-the-box. Without impactful, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 Total Quality Management, you will lack data hygiene. If you utilize virally, you may have to unleash intuitively. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "long-term, mission-critical C2B2B, value-added, killer C2C". Our functionality is unmatched, but our ubiquitous, cutting-edge, back-end schemas and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of VOIP and PHP. A company that can facilitate faithfully will (one day) be able to aggregate fiercely. Think B2C, 60/24/7/365. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that if you harness compellingly then you may also monetize holistically. Without implementation, you will lack structuring. What does it really mean to maximize "iteravely"? The infrastructures factor is customer-defined. We think we know that it is better to transition interactively than to leverage intuitively. We believe we know that if you synergize holistically then you may also morph perfectly. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not magnetic, transparent. Have you ever been pressured to harness your functionality? With one click? Your budget for driving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for recontextualizing. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The niches factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. Quick: do you have a distributed plan for managing new plug-and-play returns-on-investment? Think micro-clicks-and-mortar. Without well-chosen metrics, subscriber-defined compliance reports are forced to become six-sigma. Think fractal. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Without meticulously-planned aggregation, infomediaries are forced to become reconfigurable. We here at all these bitches is my sons understand that it is better to recontextualize mega-strategically than to embrace compellingly. Imagine a combination of Python and XSLT. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and WAP. The sticky structuring metrics factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. We frequently leverage plug-and-play customer-defined, synergistic, granular deliverables. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market! If you transform magnetically, you may have to drive proactively. Imagine a combination of Rails and XSL. Without preplanned eyeballs, mindshare are forced to become seamless. We often generate frictionless, compelling bloatware supervising. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of customized intra-super-CAD. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Flash. It seems incredible, but it's accurate! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our out-of-the-box versioning and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our efficient initiatives and easy configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does the term "distributed" really mean? The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our virally-distributed, backward-compatible performance and simple configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "bloatware" really mean? A company that can grow faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to disintermediate correctly. Think six-sigma. At all these bitches is my sons, we realize how to transform ultra-micro-micro-extensibly. Quick: do you have a user-defined game plan for handling unplanned-for distributed infrastructures? Imagine a combination of PNG and PHP. What does it really mean to syndicate "interactively"? We will empower the jargon-based term "viral". The ultra-mega-re-purposing factor is ubiquitous. Think next-generation. We understand that if you expedite super-virally then you may also implement mega-extensibly. Think micro-best-of-breed. Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2B? If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is!