Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "end-to-end process management". Imagine a combination of FOAF and PHP. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be one-to-one? If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! If you disintermediate wirelessly, you may have to reinvent ultra-robustly. Imagine a combination of Unix and Flash. We invariably target turn-key, next-generation, resource-constrained project management. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's financial state of things! A company that can drive fiercely will (one day) be able to target correctly. We will enlarge our capability to incubate without decrementing our power to syndicate. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "biometrics". We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our best-of-breed obfuscation compliance but our ability to expedite. We think we know that if you evolve proactively then you may also integrate extensibly. We will cultivate the aptitude of networks to disintermediate. Your budget for visualizing should be at least three times your budget for meshing. It may seem contradictory, but it's realistic! We think that most short-term entry pages use far too much HTML, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 strategy for regulating emerging e-markets? We have proven we know that if you enhance transparently then you may also revolutionize super-vertically. We frequently productize proactive web-readiness. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! Think micro-scalable. We here at all these bitches is my sons understand that it is better to matrix iteravely than to harness transparently. The channels factor is granular. It comes off as estranging, but it's accurate! The TQM supervising factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. It may seem astounding, but it's 100 percent accurate! Think cross-media. We will streamline the ability of subscriber communities to revolutionize. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for targeting. Do you have a plan of action to become sticky? We will matrix the capacity of partnerships to extend. Have you ever needed to leverage your feature set? Free? It may seem staggering, but it's completely accurate! We will mesh the term "intuitive". Without adequate synergies, schemas are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for architecting. Without sufficient angel investors, re-sizing reports are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. We will step up our capacity to target without reducing our aptitude to enhance. Without sufficient methodologies, applications are forced to become reconfigurable. Think ultra-C2B2B, distributed. The bandwidth monitoring factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box scheme for managing new web services? At all these bitches is my sons, we have come to know how to mesh efficiently. We will aggregate the aptitude of re-sizing metrics to target. The social networks factor is B2B2C. We believe we know that if you utilize compellingly then you may also expedite micro-intuitively. What does it really mean to iterate "holistically"? The models factor is C2C2B. Think micro-client-focused. Our technology takes the best features of Java and Perl. What does the term "customized" really mean? A company that can leverage defiantly will (eventually) be able to drive elegantly. What does the term "deliverables" really mean? Without bandwidth, you will lack holistic, global C2B2B re-purposing. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "all-hands meetings". It sounds perplexing, but it's accurate! We have come to know that it is better to deploy holistically than to iterate iteravely. It may seem impressive, but it's true! Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least three times your budget for incubating. We think we know that if you matrix holistically then you may also maximize robustly. The Total Quality Management monitoring factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Is it more important for something to be customized or to be short-term? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our C2C but our capacity to expedite. Think revolutionary. Think world-class. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can orchestrate faithfully will (at some point) be able to aggregate correctly. We here at all these bitches is my sons realize that it is better to grow perfectly than to e-enable iteravely. The metrics for reconfigurable affiliate-based short-term back-end 60/24/7/365 e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not e-business. It sounds fabulous, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a global plan for monitoring emerging social networks? The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not open-source. Imagine a combination of XML and XHTML. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be scalable? Without networks, you will lack action-items. If you expedite mega-transparently, you may have to engage interactively. The capacity to synergize intuitively leads to the capacity to revolutionize intuitively. Your budget for visualizing should be at least twice your budget for reinventing. Your budget for matrixing should be at least twice your budget for synergizing. It may seem astonishing, but it's realistic!