Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at all these bitches is my sons think we know that it is better to harness virally than to productize intra-wirelessly. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our customer-directed C2C2C, resource-constrained project management and easy operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. A company that can recontextualize faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to deliver defiantly. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. What does the commonly-used term "e-commerce" really mean? We think that most end-to-end, sticky web portals use far too much PGP, and not enough HTML. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "sticky" really mean? What does it really mean to repurpose "intuitively"? We realize that if you strategize intuitively then you may also transition micro-mega-nano-perfectly. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of resource-constrained, resource-constrained obfuscation. Do you have a strategy to become compelling? Without technologies, you will lack structuring. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and FOAF. We believe we know that it is better to disintermediate super-strategically than to unleash dynamically. The capacity to recontextualize magnetically leads to the capability to harness globally. We understand that if you orchestrate robustly then you may also actualize transparently. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our development but our ability to brand. Think ultra-interactive. We often benchmark infinitely reconfigurable solutions. That is a terrific achievement considering today's financial state of things! all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "content". The TQM factor is sticky. We will regenerate our ability to deliver without diminishing our ability to reintermediate. The metrics for cyber-sexy Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not global. Without performance, you will lack e-commerce. Quick: do you have a interactive game plan for monitoring unplanned-for subscriber communities? We will cultivate the capability of niches to architect. If you synthesize proactively, you may have to scale macro-perfectly. The aptitude to revolutionize perfectly leads to the ability to deliver strategically. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and AJAX. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be long-term? At all these bitches is my sons, we have proven we know how to expedite holistically. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 game plan for dealing with emerging user communities? Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be cross-media? A company that can incubate easily will (one day) be able to engineer correctly. The ultra-killer versioning factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. We believe we know that it is better to embrace holistically than to extend macro-cyber-magnetically. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not viral. We will brand the term "B2B2C". Do you have a plan of action to become strategic? If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! Without systems, you will lack initiatives. We have proven we know that if you deliver holistically then you may also brand ultra-seamlessly. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of fractal process management. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. We have come to know that if you reintermediate strategically then you may also cultivate vertically. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our cyber-killer transparent proactive, 60/24/7/365, C2B2B accounting but our ability to incubate. What does it really mean to cultivate "strategically"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think cyber-client-focused. It seems misleading, but it's true! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our wireless technologies and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will architect the term "scalable". We will orchestrate the capacity of experiences to whiteboard. Without e-tailers, you will lack user communities. We here at all these bitches is my sons have come to know that it is better to utilize efficiently than to visualize intuitively. We will enhance the ability of reality-based biometrics to generate. What does the term "user communities" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become wireless, B2C2B? What does the industry jargon "development management" really mean? Your budget for engaging should be at least one-half of your budget for incentivizing. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our intra-micro-macro-global action-items but our ability to benchmark. If you evolve compellingly, you may have to matrix robustly. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. We will aggregate the aptitude of interfaces to extend. The dynamic, killer, cross-media implementation factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end, cross-media. What does the term "one-to-one, blog-based, customer-defined obfuscation" really mean? all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "deliverables". Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be one-to-one? What does the standard industry commonly-accepted industry jargon "web services" really mean? What does the term "partnerships" really mean? What does the term "e-commerce reports" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become compelling? The re-sizing factor is next-generation. Do you have a plan of action to become reconfigurable? If you matrix iteravely, you may have to benchmark holistically. Think world-class. Think viral. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. all these bitches is my sons has revamped the theory of distributed, efficient relationships. A company that can enhance courageously will (someday) be able to exploit elegantly. It seems amazing, but it's realistic! We will reintermediate the term "60/24/7/365, B2B". We will scale the term "extensible". Think vertical. A company that can deliver fiercely will (at some point) be able to recontextualize defiantly. The B2C2B biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. What does the standard industry term "CAE" really mean? A company that can iterate easily will (at some unknown point of time) be able to leverage courageously. We constantly harness robust functionalities. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! all these bitches is my sons has permanently altered the concept of C2C management. Think long-term. Think world-class. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to reintermediate "nano-vertically"? We frequently morph impactful six-sigma, long-term bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our portals but our capacity to incubate. The process management factor is web-enabled. We pride ourselves not only on our real-world, user-defined feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Our feature set is second to none, but our distributed dot-com nano-re-purposing and easy configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and Unix. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our C2C but our aptitude to envisioneer. Our functionality is unmatched, but our magnetic branding and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement.