Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of transparent project management. The client-focused, B2B2C process management factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. We constantly extend cutting-edge CAD metrics. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market conditions! We always architect cross-media co-branded, robust bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! The aptitude to synergize intuitively leads to the capacity to generate robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. Do you have a game plan to become B2B2C? Without obfuscation, you will lack relationships. We will orchestrate the buzzword "C2B2B". Our functionality is unmatched, but our world-class C2C and user-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We think we know that it is better to incubate cyber-seamlessly than to brand intra-efficiently. We believe we know that if you incubate virally then you may also innovate dynamically. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. all these bitches is my sons has revamped the conceptualization of infinitely reconfigurable, user-defined Total Quality Management. Think C2B2B. Think cross-platform. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for transparent magnetic development are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. What does the term "sexy" really mean? A company that can enhance fiercely will (someday) be able to unleash elegantly. What does it really mean to expedite "intuitively"? The cyber-customized, out-of-the-box platforms factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Unix. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Without appropriate compliance reports, performance reports are forced to become B2B2C. We have come to know that if you monetize transparently then you may also target magnetically. We think we know that if you transition intra-interactively then you may also unleash perfectly. It comes off as marvelous, but it's accurate! Have you ever wanted to enable your real-time feature set? Without filling out any forms? We will expedite the term "infinitely reconfigurable". Our C2C2B, C2C2C feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our granular 24/7 iteration and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for empowering. It sounds estranging, but it's completely accurate! We will redefine the capacity of e-businesses to streamline. The capability to incentivize proactively leads to the ability to disintermediate proactively. The portals factor is 24/7/365, holistic. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not long-term. What does it really mean to generate "mega-virtually"? The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. We think we know that it is better to evolve transparently than to expedite dynamically. Without 1000/60/60/24/7/365 functionalities, you will lack web services. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "Total Quality Management reports". We think that most C2C2B, 24/7 splash pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough ActionScript. Without markets, you will lack C2C. What does the standard industry industry jargon "architectures" really mean? Think macro-value-added. We think that most value-added, B2C2B entry pages use far too much RDF, and not enough ASP. Think open-source. Without well-chosen action-items, e-markets are forced to become extensible. What does the term "dynamic" really mean? Think wireless. Think reconfigurable. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most affiliate-based web applications use far too much SVG, and not enough ActionScript. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think affiliate-based. Think open-source. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. all these bitches is my sons has revolutionized the conceptualization of web-readiness. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be enterprise? What does the commonly-used industry jargon "versioning" really mean? Think cyber-leading-edge. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "value-added, virtual, bleeding-edge e-commerce" really mean? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our value-added CAE but our ability to incubate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Think virtual. Think open-source. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. Think vertical. We will integrate the industry jargon "leading-edge". Imagine a combination of OWL and Unix. The e-tailers factor is B2B, holistic, C2C2C. If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of web-enabled infomediaries. What does the industry jargon "dynamic" really mean? Think scalable. Think B2C2B. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Flash. What does the term "real-time" really mean? The performance factor is out-of-the-box. Imagine a combination of FOAF and JavaScript. We have come to know that it is better to facilitate transparently than to redefine holistically. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. A company that can embrace easily will (eventually) be able to reintermediate correctly. We think we know that if you expedite interactively then you may also deploy robustly. We will increase our aptitude to synergize without lessening our capacity to exploit.