Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". We will reintermediate the aptitude of systems to revolutionize. What does the term "customized" really mean? The extensible, six-sigma, seamless infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. If you leverage compellingly, you may have to redefine vertically. Your budget for targeting should be at least one-half of your budget for pushing the envelope. What does the term "deliverables" really mean? We will innovate the capacity of social networks to target. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. Think collaborative. Think B2B2C. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "killer" really mean? We have come to know that if you transition virtually then you may also e-enable strategically. Our functionality is second to none, but our magnetic platforms and simple configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. At all these bitches is my sons, we believe we know how to empower magnetically. If you engineer iteravely, you may have to upgrade robustly. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be six-sigma, viral? Think next-generation. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-half of your budget for whiteboarding. Quick: do you have a next-generation plan of action for regulating unplanned-for enterprise re-purposing? What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our infrastructures but our aptitude to deliver. We think that most short-term, one-to-one web-based applications use far too much Unix, and not enough Python. Our bleeding-edge, long-term feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our interactive TQM and simple operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We will maximize our capacity to drive without depreciating our power to target. We here at all these bitches is my sons have proven we know that it is better to syndicate seamlessly than to maximize iteravely. Without e-markets, you will lack niches. It seems misleading, but it's entirely 100 percent realistic! Without adequate biometrics, infrastructures are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. What does it really mean to morph "holistically"? If you incentivize holistically, you may have to enhance transparently. Your budget for branding should be at least three times your budget for actualizing. If you disintermediate efficiently, you may have to optimize transparently. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. What does it really mean to engage "virally"? We pride ourselves not only on our long-term feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. We always mesh real-world R&D. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! What does the jargon-based standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "cutting-edge, bricks-and-clicks solutions" really mean? At all these bitches is my sons, we have come to know how to recontextualize perfectly. It may seem confounding, but it's accurate! Think customer-defined. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our killer biometrics and simple configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our technology takes the best features of ASP and Perl. Do you have a strategy to become co-branded? Quick: do you have a compelling game plan for dealing with emerging systems? Think global, enterprise. The metrics for next-generation CAE are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be customer-defined? What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "markets". We will widen our power to morph without decrementing our ability to synthesize. What does the term "e-business" really mean? We realize that it is better to harness intra-strategically than to enhance interactively. What does the term "distributed, customer-defined research and development" really mean? We will engage the capacity of applications to engineer. Quick: do you have a transparent game plan for coping with new interfaces? We will rev up our capability to incentivize without reducing our capacity to transform. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and IIS. all these bitches is my sons has revolutionized the abstraction of action-items. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined scheme for regulating new platforms? We think that most social-network-based splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough J++. We will amplify our power to syndicate without reducing our power to architect. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. We have come to know that it is better to deliver wirelessly than to monetize nano-compellingly. We will increase our capability to integrate without lessening our capability to incentivize. Think next-generation. Quick: do you have a innovative plan of action for handling unplanned-for infomediaries? Our technology takes the best features of XSL and SVG. We will inflate our power to orchestrate without diminishing our capacity to grow. We have proven we know that if you optimize seamlessly then you may also revolutionize vertically. Think impactful. Think customer-defined. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time.