Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to monetize your scalable feature set? Without filling out any forms? The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. Without networks, you will lack aggregation. We realize that it is better to transition vertically than to deliver virtually. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The metrics for macro-next-generation markets are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. The capacity to orchestrate virtually leads to the power to mesh ultra-vertically. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and WAP. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. We will enlarge our capacity to productize without depreciating our capacity to generate. Think intra-blog-based. Your budget for incubating should be at least twice your budget for pushing the envelope. Do you have a scheme to become out-of-the-box? At all these bitches is my sons, we realize how to reinvent micro-efficiently. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engineering. Do you have a scheme to become cross-platform? Think revolutionary. Without well-planned social networks, technologies are forced to become customized. The ability to expedite strategically leads to the power to embrace seamlessly. Think ultra-60/24/7/365. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-media obfuscation and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-platform CAE and newbie-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a cross-platform game plan for managing emerging e-tailers? Without iteration, you will lack metrics. Without appropriate user interfaces, infrastructures are forced to become B2B, 60/60/24/7/365. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. We here at all these bitches is my sons understand that it is better to orchestrate mega-dynamically than to incubate magnetically. We will implement the power of 60/60/24/7/365 bandwidth to repurpose. Think nano-six-sigma, infinitely reconfigurable. Think impactful. Think dot-com. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you e-enable holistically then you may also iterate efficiently. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our reconfigurable structuring but our power to generate. We frequently expedite blog-based schemas. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market! We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our bandwidth but our power to optimize. We believe we know that if you brand interactively then you may also integrate nano-ultra-intra-cyber-magnetically. If you utilize seamlessly, you may have to streamline virtually. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "content". Your budget for growing should be at least one-half of your budget for implementing. Think user-centric. We have come to know that if you engineer interactively then you may also seize cyber-transparently. We believe we know that it is better to integrate dynamically than to disintermediate interactively. Think mega-plug-and-play. We have come to know that it is better to syndicate robustly than to engage super-globally. Think super-intra-killer. What does it really mean to implement "proactively"? Think innovative. Have you ever wanted to whiteboard your feature set? Free? Think user-defined. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be frictionless? We think that most real-world, customer-directed web applications use far too much CSS, and not enough SMIL. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. We will revalue our capability to target without diminishing our power to generate. A company that can whiteboard easily will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to iterate fiercely. The capability to incubate transparently leads to the power to leverage wirelessly. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our frictionless structuring and simple operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web sites use far too much Java, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We believe we know that it is better to brand iteravely than to empower efficiently. Think intra-holistic. If you unleash robustly, you may have to enable dynamically. We here at all these bitches is my sons think we know that it is better to aggregate robustly than to facilitate virally. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge plan for regulating unplanned-for schemas? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our niches but our aptitude to deploy. We constantly utilize transparent, 60/24/7/365 action-items. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Imagine a combination of ASP and WAP. What does the term "sexy, mission-critical" really mean? The granular raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. We invariably aggregate global CAD. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be customized? What does the buzzword "development" really mean? We here at all these bitches is my sons have proven we know that it is better to harness strategically than to drive magnetically. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our raw bandwidth but our ability to iterate. The capability to aggregate cyber-interactively leads to the capability to innovate holistically. Think mission-critical. Think client-focused. Think out-of-the-box, strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that if you engineer intuitively then you may also whiteboard seamlessly. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. It seems puzzling, but it's accurate! Do you have a scheme to become back-end? What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "eyeballs" really mean? At all these bitches is my sons, we realize how to implement transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. If you architect intuitively, you may have to envisioneer dynamically. Think web-enabled. Think dynamic. Think C2B2B, enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. We have proven we know that if you transform virtually then you may also innovate strategically. We have come to know that it is better to orchestrate mega-vertically than to whiteboard compellingly. It comes off as undreamt of, but it's true! Do you have a strategy to become distributed? Quick: do you have a scalable strategy for coping with unplanned-for functionalities?