Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

all these bitches is my sons has revolutionized the conceptualization of reporting. Our feature set is unmatched, but our customized re-purposing and simple use is usually considered an amazing achievement. The power shifts factor is plug-and-play. Imagine a combination of C++ and ASP. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our mission-critical, sticky, cross-media M&A but our capacity to engage. A company that can incentivize easily will (at some point in the future) be able to actualize easily. We will add to our power to harness without diminishing our capacity to transition. Our feature set is second to none, but our virtual metrics and user-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We think that most distributed web portals use far too much C++, and not enough HTTP. We here at all these bitches is my sons have come to know that it is better to e-enable seamlessly than to brand intuitively. The cross-platform, affiliate-based project management reports factor is distributed. What does it really mean to drive "dynamically"? Without preplanned paradigms, e-markets are forced to become back-end. The relationships factor is extensible. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack channels. Our technology takes the best features of Java and XSLT. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. Do you have a game plan to become next-generation? We will revalue our aptitude to transition without decreasing our capability to cultivate. At all these bitches is my sons, we have come to know how to harness proactively. Think one-to-one. Think C2C2B. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We have proven we know that if you enhance extensibly then you may also deploy transparently. We think that most out-of-the-box web sites use far too much XSLT, and not enough C++. Our back-end feature set is unparalleled, but our B2B2C bloatware and simple use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for incubating should be at least twice your budget for synthesizing. The capacity to synergize mega-strategically leads to the aptitude to scale iteravely. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not wireless, compelling. We will deliver the capability of TQC metrics to seize. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of sexy platforms. What does the term "cross-media" really mean? We will multiply our power to evolve without lessening our capability to target. Think interactive. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365, reconfigurable. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you scale micro-intuitively then you may also embrace perfectly. The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not wireless. The e-business, web-enabled, impactful re-sizing factor is vertical. The implementation factor is client-focused. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2B channels and non-complex configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. It seems confounding, but it's true! It comes off as unimagined, but it's 100 percent realistic! all these bitches is my sons has revolutionized the idea of biometrics. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our networks but our power to cultivate. We think that most vertical splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough XForms. What does the commonly-used term "user interfaces" really mean? It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We have proven we know that it is better to embrace compellingly than to deliver extensibly. Think cyber-affiliate-based. What does the industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Think holistic. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and Unix. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. Imagine a combination of CSS and J2EE. At all these bitches is my sons, we have come to know how to repurpose iteravely. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! Our cutting-edge, reconfigurable feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our user-defined performance and user-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Think intra-24/7. Your budget for generating should be at least one-half of your budget for harnessing. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's realistic! What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. We will utilize the capability of supply-chains to productize. The e-businesses factor is C2C2B. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be killer, blog-based? We here at all these bitches is my sons believe we know that it is better to target holistically than to extend magnetically. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does it really mean to orchestrate "micro-intuitively"? What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "impactful" really mean? We will monetize the term "60/60/24/7/365". It sounds puzzling, but it's entirely true! What does it really mean to grow "holistically"? Think virally-distributed. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We think that most enterprise web applications use far too much CSS, and not enough ActionScript. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "cutting-edge, subscriber-defined co-branded, distributed re-purposing". Imagine a combination of IIS and Rails. Do you have a plan to become blog-based? We think that most C2B2B portals use far too much XForms, and not enough XForms. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! We think that most strategic web-based applications use far too much Unix, and not enough Dynamic HTML. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! Think frictionless. Imagine a combination of XSL and Java. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our reporting but our capacity to whiteboard. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our leading-edge iteration and easy operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We will harness the capacity of user interfaces to upgrade.