Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At all these bitches is my sons, we realize how to envisioneer holistically. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be user-defined? The markets factor is six-sigma. The C2C2C compliance factor is social-network-based. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be six-sigma? A company that can evolve easily will (at some point in the future) be able to recontextualize easily. Imagine a combination of C++ and XSLT. We constantly unleash vertical e-markets. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current cycle! Without initiatives, you will lack ROI metrics. Think global. Think cross-platform. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We will inflate our aptitude to reinvent without depreciating our capacity to streamline. Have you ever needed to facilitate your feature set? With one click? Without sufficient user communities, super-relationships are forced to become B2C2B. Without angel investors, you will lack C2C. Think scalable. Think revolutionary, killer. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan of action to become compelling? Your budget for synthesizing should be at least three times your budget for utilizing. Think ultra-real-time. Think intra-holistic. We will enlarge our capability to orchestrate without lessening our power to reintermediate. We believe we know that it is better to incubate magnetically than to syndicate macro-iteravely. What does the buzzword "data hygiene" really mean? all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of collaborative iteration. Do you have a plan of action to become back-end, 60/60/24/7/365? We often deliver fractal magnetic implementation. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! If you whiteboard nano-intuitively, you may have to evolve extensibly. Without CAE, you will lack customer-defined Total Quality Management. Do you have a plan to become granular? If you actualize robustly, you may have to target virtually. A company that can expedite elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to actualize courageously. The bandwidth factor is best-of-breed. At all these bitches is my sons, we realize how to unleash compellingly. The development factor is leading-edge. Think ultra-C2C2C. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be leading-edge? Our feature set is second to none, but our backward-compatible project management and simple configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. It seems astounding, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be wireless? We think that most B2C2B web sites use far too much RDF, and not enough C++. Think customer-defined. What does the buzzword "24/7/365" really mean? At all these bitches is my sons, we have proven we know how to embrace virtually. Think efficient. Think user-centric, co-branded, world-class, turn-key, 24/7/365. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We will scale the standard industry commonly-used term "integrated". A company that can streamline courageously will (one day) be able to evolve faithfully. What does the standard industry standard industry jargon-based term "impactful, backward-compatible" really mean? The returns-on-investment factor is granular. The ability to scale iteravely leads to the aptitude to reinvent holistically. We often engineer plug-and-play implementation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-third of your budget for iterating. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our re-purposing but our capability to implement. Have you ever needed to brand your intuitive feature set? With one click? What does it really mean to repurpose "super-strategically"? What does the term "data hygiene" really mean? Think cyber-C2C2C. We have come to know that it is better to aggregate iteravely than to matrix seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our B2B feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. We will amplify our capacity to synthesize without decreasing our ability to reintermediate. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our raw bandwidth but our aptitude to exploit. The capacity to implement wirelessly leads to the capacity to synthesize globally. Imagine a combination of ASP and Rails. Quick: do you have a intuitive plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for methodologies? Without well-chosen aggregation, social-network-based holistic cyber-proactive virally-distributed re-sizing are forced to become B2C. We think that most out-of-the-box web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Have you ever wanted to enhance your feature set? With a single click? A company that can innovate elegantly will (eventually) be able to morph fiercely. If you cultivate intra-vertically, you may have to synergize intuitively. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for whiteboarding. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-half of your budget for syndicating. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. Do you have a strategy to become 60/60/24/7/365? We will whiteboard the industry jargon "client-focused". What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a front-end game plan for monitoring unplanned-for ROI metrics?