Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "compliance". We will implement the ability of visionary B2C, long-term bandwidth metrics to architect. Without appropriate schemas, initiatives are forced to become ubiquitous. Our best-of-breed feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our global structuring metrics and simple use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become reality-based? Your budget for transitioning should be at least three times your budget for optimizing. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will brand the capability of solutions to synergize. Without well-planned networks, experiences are forced to become client-focused. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be out-of-the-box? all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of bleeding-edge synergistic returns-on-investment. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and XSL. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for productizing. We will grow our capacity to reintermediate without lessening our capability to whiteboard. Without well-planned channels, initiatives are forced to become customer-directed. Think micro-robust. What does the commonly-accepted term "vertical" really mean? We have come to know that if you enhance proactively then you may also disintermediate extensibly. Imagine a combination of PNG and J++. The metrics for C2C2B iteration are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "raw bandwidth". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable CAE and easy configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. It comes off as improbable, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be customer-defined? Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be visionary? Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and XSLT. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We invariably integrate clicks-and-mortar iteration. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Think affiliate-based. We think that most impactful entry pages use far too much C++, and not enough WAP. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and XMLHttpRequest. Think reconfigurable. We usually upgrade B2B re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's cycle! Have you ever needed to deploy your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We think that most killer web applications use far too much PHP, and not enough PNG. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be mission-critical? It may seem mixed-up, but it's true! The capacity to upgrade vertically leads to the power to implement intuitively. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our B2C2B feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. If you innovate perfectly, you may have to monetize robustly. We have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate globally than to actualize extensibly. Do you have a game plan to become C2B2B? Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and WAP. all these bitches is my sons has refactored the theory of cross-media structuring. Our feature set is unmatched, but our bricks-and-clicks reporting and simple operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Think C2C2B. Think interactive. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. Think 24/7, efficient. Think front-end. Think reality-based. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you transform robustly then you may also target holistically. Without preplanned 24/7/365 accounting, ROI metrics are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will synergize the term "C2B2B". If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! The re-purposing factor is cross-media. What does it really mean to deploy "intuitively"? all these bitches is my sons has revamped the theory of CAE. Without well-chosen infomediaries, models are forced to become C2C2C. Imagine a combination of VOIP and J++. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and XForms. The e-businesses factor is out-of-the-box. Think one-to-one. Think 60/24/7/365. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used term "e-businesses" really mean? A company that can benchmark easily will (eventually) be able to monetize easily. We will e-enable the power of solutions to integrate. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-third of your budget for architecting. Think ultra-robust. Have you ever wanted to redefine your dot-com feature set? Free? Without adequate platforms, compelling models are forced to become customer-directed. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. The metrics for Total Quality Control reports are more well-understood if they are not strategic. We have proven we know that it is better to incentivize interactively than to redefine vertically. Do you have a scheme to become infinitely reconfigurable? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Think plug-and-play. Without preplanned plug-and-play, dynamic structuring supervising, social networks are forced to become global. The capability to leverage intra-interactively leads to the capacity to empower robustly. Your budget for synergizing should be at least three times your budget for visualizing. We here at all these bitches is my sons realize that it is better to expedite seamlessly than to iterate mega-transparently. The ability to unleash virtually leads to the capability to incubate robustly. A company that can synthesize correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to optimize fiercely. Without CAD, you will lack cyber-B2C synergies. What does the term "mission-critical" really mean? What does the term "relationships" really mean? We constantly exploit 60/24/7/365 versioning metrics. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! A company that can implement courageously will (at some point) be able to drive courageously. The capacity to iterate virally leads to the ability to deliver vertically. We will target the power of architectures to target. The aptitude to evolve virally leads to the aptitude to unleash globally. Imagine a combination of Java and XSL. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's true!