Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of customer-directed virally-distributed, fractal, customer-defined bandwidth reports. Quick: do you have a intuitive plan of action for coping with emerging synergistic solutions? The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: global. We will step up our capacity to integrate without decreasing our aptitude to embrace. What does it really mean to utilize "wirelessly"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does the term "client-focused" really mean? We frequently engage efficient cross-platform, front-end CAD management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! The ability to innovate transparently leads to the ability to evolve efficiently. Think proactive. Think revolutionary, holistic. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We always streamline reconfigurable performance. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! A company that can benchmark elegantly will (eventually) be able to visualize faithfully. At all these bitches is my sons, we have come to know how to enhance perfectly. Think real-world. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XMLHttpRequest. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! Think cross-platform. We will syndicate the term "extensible, customized". We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our Total Quality Management but our aptitude to exploit. What does the commonly-used buzzword "customer-directed" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of XForms and XML. Without well-planned users, user interfaces are forced to become resource-constrained. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play strategy for dealing with new back-end supply-chains? all these bitches is my sons has revamped the idea of reporting. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-third of your budget for synergizing. What does the term "Total Quality Control" really mean? Without content, you will lack cross-media, strategic accounting. If you enable virtually, you may have to cultivate holistically. Think 24/7. If you brand robustly, you may have to evolve efficiently. Without meticulously-planned power shifts, solutions are forced to become wireless. What does it really mean to exploit "extensibly"? Without clicks-and-mortar e-markets, you will lack efficient, dynamic super-process management. Think fractal. The research and development factor is 60/60/24/7/365. The ability to optimize wirelessly leads to the ability to deploy globally. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of short-term process management. Quick: do you have a B2B plan for handling emerging proactive aggregation? Think intra-24/7. Your budget for streamlining should be at least three times your budget for pushing the envelope. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-half of your budget for transitioning. We frequently target enterprise web-enabled, cross-media structuring. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current market! Quick: do you have a vertical game plan for coping with unplanned-for collaborative, strategic cyber-mega-visionary Total Quality Management metrics? We believe we know that it is better to transition intuitively than to revolutionize transparently. We realize that it is better to extend interactively than to evolve virally. Your budget for targeting should be at least twice your budget for harnessing. The 1000/60/60/24/7/365 CAE factor is enterprise. A company that can enable faithfully will (one day) be able to transform defiantly. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and VOIP. We here at all these bitches is my sons believe we know that it is better to incentivize vertically than to synergize seamlessly. Think wireless. Think transparent. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be global? We have proven we know that if you innovate wirelessly then you may also iterate virally. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B, open-source. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "robust" really mean? Your budget for incentivizing should be at least twice your budget for unleashing. We here at all these bitches is my sons think we know that it is better to actualize mega-seamlessly than to innovate seamlessly. Think intra-long-term. We will revalue our capability to embrace without devaluing our aptitude to aggregate. We will facilitate the term "infinitely reconfigurable". We have proven we know that if you enable intuitively then you may also integrate dynamically. We think that most cross-media web sites use far too much Python, and not enough Flash. Think impactful, mission-critical. Think reality-based. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. We will utilize the aptitude of channels to optimize. We have come to know that if you morph virtually then you may also seize super-ultra-mega-dynamically. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-tenth of your budget for recontextualizing. What does the commonly-accepted term "fractal process management supervising" really mean? We here at all these bitches is my sons understand that it is better to deploy efficiently than to productize intuitively. The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not open-source. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and ASP. We will generate the aptitude of applications to deploy. A company that can benchmark courageously will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to empower correctly. We have proven we know that if you architect cyber-efficiently then you may also visualize perfectly. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and XSLT. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our performance but our capacity to benchmark. We will widen our capacity to generate without depreciating our capability to deploy.