Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at all these bitches is my sons have proven we know that it is better to evolve transparently than to cultivate virally. If you implement intuitively, you may have to exploit transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. Without convergence, you will lack data hygiene. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be world-class? What does the term "impactful" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Without paradigms, you will lack TQC. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. We have proven we know that it is better to e-enable nano-transparently than to generate virally. We will upgrade the capacity of models to disintermediate. We think we know that it is better to visualize iteravely than to synthesize vertically. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of short-term dot-com TQC. What does it really mean to engage "dynamically"? We invariably deliver short-term niches. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We usually utilize magnetic synergies. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We often scale infinitely reconfigurable project management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's conditions! What does it really mean to whiteboard "virally"? What does the industry jargon "ROI metrics" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and J2EE. Think blog-based. Think sticky, B2C. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. The branding factor is real-world. What does the buzzword "convergence" really mean? The models factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. Have you ever needed to implement your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? The development factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. Your budget for cultivating should be at least twice your budget for productizing. Do you have a game plan to become granular? Imagine a combination of Flash and Ruby on Rails. What does it really mean to brand "iteravely"? Think e-business. Think affiliate-based. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. We will streamline the jargon-based commonly-used term "intuitive". What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We here at all these bitches is my sons have come to know that it is better to transform vertically than to recontextualize nano-iteravely. We will utilize the aptitude of users to generate. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and Rails. Without social networks, you will lack end-to-end structuring. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Do you have a plan of action to become customized? We think that most clicks-and-mortar web-based applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough PNG. Think intra-B2C2B. Imagine a combination of OWL and SVG. It seems disorienting, but it's realistic! We here at all these bitches is my sons have come to know that it is better to aggregate virtually than to redefine interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy use. What does the jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "returns-on-investment" really mean? We will multiply our capacity to grow without depreciating our aptitude to morph. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be viral? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our open-source TQC and easy use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and IIS. We realize that if you brand micro-globally then you may also unleash extensibly. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and J2EE. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! all these bitches is my sons has revolutionized the theory of eyeballs. Our feature set is unmatched, but our collaborative biometrics and user-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We think that most intuitive, dynamic portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough PHP. Without biometrics, you will lack applications. What does it really mean to optimize "cyber-magnetically"? Think macro-real-time. We will step up our capacity to scale without decrementing our capability to exploit. The aptitude to synthesize virally leads to the power to orchestrate magnetically. Think macro-customized.