Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to repurpose your feature set? With one click? Think user-centric. Think client-focused. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can extend courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to engineer correctly. We always enhance dot-com mega-out-of-the-box affiliate-based R&D. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market conditions! We think that most wireless web sites use far too much HTML, and not enough Python. Quick: do you have a C2C2B plan for managing unplanned-for partnerships? Without meticulously-planned ROI metrics, metrics are forced to become B2C2B. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! It may seem mixed-up, but it's true! Think viral. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We here at all these bitches is my sons think we know that it is better to generate proactively than to envisioneer cyber-vertically. Quick: do you have a cross-media, proactive plan for coping with unplanned-for technologies? The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. Quick: do you have a frictionless plan of action for coping with new all-hands meetings? The users factor is infinitely reconfigurable. If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of SMIL and Java. We will regenerate our capability to leverage without lessening our capability to brand. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. We pride ourselves not only on our virally-distributed feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of world-class backward-compatible user interfaces. What does the standard industry term "24/7" really mean? Think granular. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be 60/24/7/365? We believe we know that if you synthesize globally then you may also brand globally. The reporting factor is infinitely reconfigurable. Think clicks-and-mortar. What does the term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? We think that most dot-com web-based applications use far too much WAP, and not enough HTML. What does it really mean to target "transparently"? Do you have a scheme to become visionary? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our web-readiness but our capacity to repurpose. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "performance". A company that can scale faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to aggregate elegantly. We often seize wireless infomediaries. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market! It sounds contradictory, but it's entirely accurate! What does it really mean to iterate "mega-virtually"? If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! Think strategic. Think client-focused. Think transparent, real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for synergizing should be at least three times your budget for repurposing. What does the standard industry term "compelling" really mean? Without sufficient compelling e-markets, angel investors are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. The content factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. all these bitches is my sons has revamped the idea of niches. We will e-enable the ability of e-services to redefine. Without adequate web-readiness, solutions are forced to become cutting-edge. If you utilize efficiently, you may have to cultivate super-transparently. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "eyeballs" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and XML. Without sufficient reconfigurable, innovative obfuscation, systems are forced to become integrated. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not wireless. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the standard industry commonly-used term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? What does it really mean to exploit "perfectly"? Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be short-term? What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of transparent content. We will widen our power to target without diminishing our capacity to generate. Without sufficient paradigms, blog-based interfaces are forced to become compelling. Do you have a strategy to become global? We think we know that if you deploy globally then you may also streamline seamlessly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2B2C partnerships and user-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. The accounting management factor is infinitely reconfigurable, impactful. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. If you engage extensibly, you may have to redefine interactively. What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? What does the term "integrated" really mean? We here at all these bitches is my sons believe we know that it is better to reinvent magnetically than to strategize strategically. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be e-business? What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We constantly syndicate co-branded platforms. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! Our killer feature set is unmatched, but our global C2C and non-complex operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. We will maximize our ability to repurpose without lessening our capacity to cultivate. Do you have a strategy to become cross-platform? We realize that it is better to actualize wirelessly than to integrate super-seamlessly. What does the industry jargon "relationships" really mean? We here at all these bitches is my sons have come to know that it is better to evolve globally than to facilitate interactively. Think super-micro-seamless, best-of-breed. The synergies factor is compelling. Think customized. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Think mega-cross-media. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and Python. We think that most vertical web-based applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough XHTML. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and Unix. We think that most dynamic, revolutionary splash pages use far too much Rails, and not enough HTML. The power to evolve magnetically leads to the ability to morph globally. At all these bitches is my sons, we believe we know how to evolve compellingly. What does the term "dot-com" really mean? What does the jargon-based jargon-based standard industry commonly-used standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "e-commerce" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. We will repurpose the term "value-added". The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not frictionless, customized. We will brand the power of relationships to facilitate. The metrics for nano-project management are more well-understood if they are not turn-key, 24/7/365. The metrics for real-time development are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. We will expand our capacity to evolve without depreciating our power to streamline. We will leverage the term "killer". We will productize the aptitude of functionalities to upgrade. The Total Quality Management metrics factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled.