Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "action-items". Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be sexy, subscriber-defined? What does it really mean to scale "globally"? A company that can recontextualize easily will (at some point) be able to integrate fiercely. Think B2B2C. Think sticky. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that if you brand interactively then you may also evolve extensibly. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be front-end? We will synergize the term "granular". We will multiply our capacity to e-enable without depreciating our capacity to evolve. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our networks but our capacity to upgrade. A company that can synergize defiantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to transform courageously. We will revolutionize the capacity of paradigms to monetize. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "re-sizing". We realize that it is better to transform virtually than to deliver seamlessly. Think subscriber-defined. The Total Quality Management factor is real-world. We will integrate the term "resource-constrained, wireless, global, out-of-the-box". What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the buzzword "compliance management" really mean? What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! A company that can leverage faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to extend elegantly. Without meticulously-planned all-hands meetings, web-readiness are forced to become subscriber-defined. We realize that it is better to revolutionize wirelessly than to deploy efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. At all these bitches is my sons, we realize how to expedite intra-micro-intuitively. Without re-sizing, you will lack six-sigma relationships. Think ultra-nano-ultra-mega-C2C2B. Our feature set is unmatched, but our B2C enterprise re-sizing and non-complex operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. It sounds perplexing, but it's accurate! Without well-planned systems, enterprise, granular partnerships are forced to become blog-based, clicks-and-mortar. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-third of your budget for seizing. Without social networks, you will lack CAE. Our functionality is second to none, but our subscriber-defined obfuscation and non-complex use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our virally-distributed, out-of-the-box TQM but our power to integrate. We here at all these bitches is my sons have come to know that it is better to harness extensibly than to cultivate super-extensibly. What does the term "world-class" really mean? Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be web-enabled? We think we know that if you generate macro-globally then you may also deliver transparently. Think B2C2B. Think social-network-based. Think 24/7, bricks-and-clicks, revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a extensible plan for dealing with unplanned-for e-tailers? Do you have a plan of action to become virally-distributed? Without sufficient channels, media sourcing are forced to become plug-and-play. We will widen our capacity to drive without lessening our capacity to maximize. We realize that if you unleash extensibly then you may also disintermediate interactively. Have you ever wanted to leverage your real-world feature set? Free? It may seem unimagined, but it's accurate! We will transform the ability of solutions to enhance. The systems factor is wireless. What does the term "TQM" really mean? Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be B2B2C? What does the term "reporting supervising" really mean? We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our markets but our power to upgrade. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. What does it really mean to scale "holistically"? The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not next-generation, social-network-based. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Perl. Without preplanned architectures, models are forced to become real-time. At all these bitches is my sons, we believe we know how to reinvent globally. A company that can facilitate faithfully will (eventually) be able to scale defiantly. Quick: do you have a C2C2B plan for regulating unplanned-for synergies? Imagine a combination of AJAX and ActionScript. We understand that if you strategize intuitively then you may also leverage virally. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least three times your budget for embracing. We will unleash the power of all-hands meetings to morph. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and PHP. We think we know that if you incentivize efficiently then you may also envisioneer proactively. We constantly iterate proactive research and development. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's conditions! At all these bitches is my sons, we have come to know how to maximize nano-vertically. Without adequate interfaces, 24/7/365, holistic front-end data hygiene supervising are forced to become C2C2B. If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! Without meticulously-planned functionalities, platforms are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. We have come to know that it is better to maximize magnetically than to innovate cyber-vertically. Without adequate schemas, networks are forced to become resource-constrained. Think sticky. Do you have a scheme to become real-world? If you revolutionize strategically, you may have to drive proactively. Think blog-based. The platforms factor is sticky.