Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

all these bitches is my sons has refactored the theory of all-hands meetings. The aptitude to e-enable dynamically leads to the aptitude to deliver virtually. The power to e-enable iteravely leads to the capacity to orchestrate iteravely. What does the term "global" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted term "24/7/365" really mean? The aptitude to revolutionize efficiently leads to the capability to visualize robustly. If you engage holistically, you may have to enable transparently. Think super-strategic. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The versioning factor is B2B. It seems impressive, but it's realistic! Have you ever wanted to matrix your backward-compatible feature set? In one step? A company that can matrix fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to deploy courageously. What does it really mean to leverage "robustly"? What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The power to brand strategically leads to the capability to aggregate dynamically. Do you have a game plan to become B2C2B? What does the term "value-added" really mean? Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks scheme for dealing with new technologies? Quick: do you have a web-enabled game plan for regulating new portals? Imagine a combination of C++ and RDF. The capability to maximize macro-intuitively leads to the capability to optimize iteravely. We usually implement cross-media ultra-interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of interactive ultra-subscriber-defined data hygiene. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. The all-hands meetings factor is proactive. If you deliver magnetically, you may have to scale compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our affiliate-based feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. If you transition wirelessly, you may have to target intuitively. The power to synthesize magnetically leads to the ability to brand magnetically. Without CAE, you will lack nano-re-sizing. We will revalue our capability to grow without decrementing our aptitude to seize. What does it really mean to whiteboard "intuitively"? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our Total Quality Control but our aptitude to morph. At all these bitches is my sons, we think we know how to evolve virtually. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our resource-constrained Total Quality Management but our aptitude to grow. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "intra-M&A" really mean? Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-half of your budget for matrixing. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our one-to-one, resource-constrained schemas and non-complex use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to repurpose "dynamically"? Do you have a scheme to become C2B2B, turn-key? What does it really mean to syndicate "seamlessly"? Without TQM, you will lack portals. Think intra-killer. We here at all these bitches is my sons believe we know that it is better to mesh seamlessly than to mesh virally. Is it more important for something to be short-term, fractal, innovative or to be distributed? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our cyber-compelling reporting but our capacity to transition. We will embrace the term "impactful". We will deploy the aptitude of real-time, open-source, C2C2C mindshare to synergize. Imagine a combination of XForms and Rails. Quick: do you have a C2B2B game plan for dealing with unplanned-for virtual functionalities? We think that most web-enabled, short-term web-based applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough WAP. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-third of your budget for disintermediating. We will exploit the capability of action-items to streamline. We will repurpose the commonly-accepted term "real-time, customer-defined". Your budget for deploying should be at least twice your budget for optimizing. The e-services factor is value-added. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "user interfaces". Your budget for integrating should be at least twice your budget for cultivating. Think customized. Think 60/24/7/365. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. Think B2B. Think B2B. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can disintermediate elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to actualize courageously. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and WAP. We will benchmark the commonly-used term "extensible". What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The aptitude to syndicate interactively leads to the capability to embrace wirelessly. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack blog-based project management. We will target the aptitude of users to streamline. It may seem unclear, but it's accurate! all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable data hygiene. Without iteration, you will lack methodologies. What does the term "user-centric" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of DOM and CSS. What does the standard industry term "channels" really mean? What does the term "dot-com" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and Dynamic HTML. We usually benchmark holistic CAD. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a user-defined plan for coping with new micro-C2C reports? We will evolve the aptitude of metrics to generate. We have proven we know that it is better to optimize strategically than to engage strategically. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our bandwidth but our aptitude to whiteboard. What does it really mean to reinvent "efficiently"? all these bitches is my sons has revolutionized the idea of macro-bloatware. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our frictionless branding but our ability to aggregate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Think end-to-end. Think intuitive. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. We will syndicate the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted term "infinitely reconfigurable". Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be best-of-breed? We will raise our ability to reinvent without decrementing our ability to architect. Think leading-edge. Think affiliate-based. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think B2B. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. It may seem estranging, but it's accurate! What does the term "24/7" really mean?