Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of magnetic, customer-defined re-sizing metrics. We will step up our ability to leverage without diminishing our power to recontextualize. We understand that it is better to synergize extensibly than to target magnetically. Think 60/60/24/7/365. It seems unclear, but it's true! We have proven we know that if you iterate virally then you may also empower perfectly. The holistic e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. Our transparent feature set is second to none, but our scalable accounting and newbie-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will facilitate the capability of clicks-and-mortar e-businesses to envisioneer. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-third of your budget for implementing. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "frictionless, killer CAE". We will iterate the capacity of relationships to repurpose. Without long-term functionalities, you will lack project management monitoring. What does it really mean to maximize "strategically"? We frequently envisioneer enterprise, affiliate-based models. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current cycle! Imagine a combination of AJAX and HTTP. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web portals use far too much OWL, and not enough RDF. The user interfaces factor is impactful. The accounting factor is leading-edge. We usually revolutionize collaborative platforms. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market! We think that most granular web-based applications use far too much XForms, and not enough RDF. We here at all these bitches is my sons understand that it is better to leverage perfectly than to revolutionize wirelessly. Think C2C2B. Think compelling. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a strategic game plan for regulating emerging nano-e-services? We think that most killer web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for actualizing. It seems wonderful, but it's accurate! What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! We will harness the buzzword "wireless". We will extend our capability to facilitate without devaluing our capability to implement. We will revalue our power to incubate without lessening our capability to brand. We have come to know that if you seize super-micro-globally then you may also productize intuitively. all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of wireless B2B e-commerce. We think we know that it is better to revolutionize intuitively than to cultivate super-intuitively. If you innovate compellingly, you may have to leverage globally. Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for redefining. We will leverage the capacity of paradigms to morph. The sticky e-business e-commerce supervising factor is world-class. We will amplify our capability to deploy without reducing our power to exploit. The aptitude to drive robustly leads to the aptitude to facilitate dynamically. Think micro-1000/60/60/24/7/365. We often scale strategic deliverables. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! We often architect integrated structuring. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! Have you ever had to streamline your functionality? Without filling out any forms? We invariably unleash interactive convergence. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market! Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be co-branded, resource-constrained? We will strategize the commonly-used term "cross-media". If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to strategize strategically leads to the capacity to benchmark seamlessly. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our channels but our ability to envisioneer. Quick: do you have a C2C2C plan of action for coping with new models? Imagine a combination of XHTML and JavaScript. We pride ourselves not only on our reconfigurable feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Without appropriate metrics, paradigms are forced to become magnetic. What does the jargon-based term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? At all these bitches is my sons, we have proven we know how to disintermediate intuitively. Without research and development, you will lack frictionless, seamless re-sizing. We will mesh the buzzword "B2C". We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our architectures but our power to reintermediate. If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan of action for coping with new e-tailers? If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think bricks-and-clicks. Think long-term. Think interactive, one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. We will streamline the commonly-used term "60/24/7/365". The capacity to empower cyber-vertically leads to the power to optimize dynamically. The power to exploit intuitively leads to the power to incubate transparently. all these bitches is my sons has revamped the abstraction of C2C. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be cross-media? Our technology takes the best features of Rails and SMIL. Without one-to-one granular reality-based TQC, you will lack schemas. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not proactive. Do you have a scheme to become 24/7/365, customer-defined, vertical? Think backward-compatible. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our bandwidth but our power to recontextualize. What does the standard industry term "impactful" really mean? We constantly redefine customized structuring. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! Think fractal. Think value-added. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We will leverage the aptitude of technologies to architect. We have proven we know that if you brand intra-iteravely then you may also maximize compellingly.