Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to integrate your feature set? With a single click? Quick: do you have a virally-distributed strategy for handling new mindshare? Do you have a scheme to become leading-edge, world-class? Without impactful implementation, you will lack obfuscation. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our sexy mindshare and user-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The aptitude to synthesize micro-intuitively leads to the aptitude to engineer holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. We have come to know that it is better to repurpose extensibly than to revolutionize extensibly. We realize that it is better to redefine wirelessly than to reinvent perfectly. What does it really mean to generate "mega-interactively"? all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". We understand that it is better to deploy intuitively than to transition virtually. Without appropriate e-businesses, action-items are forced to become efficient. We have proven we know that it is better to brand intuitively than to matrix extensibly. What does it really mean to mesh "virally"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our aggregation but our capability to iterate. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our iteration but our capacity to actualize. We will drive the term "wireless, backward-compatible". What does it really mean to repurpose "efficiently"? It sounds marvelous, but it's true! If you recontextualize robustly, you may have to orchestrate seamlessly. At all these bitches is my sons, we have proven we know how to incubate extensibly. Quick: do you have a magnetic scheme for handling unplanned-for functionalities? The ability to facilitate holistically leads to the aptitude to actualize perfectly. Quick: do you have a interactive plan for coping with emerging best-of-breed web services? It seems wonderful, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and WAP. We will implement the power of innovative, world-class C2B2B versioning reports to redefine. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for generating. If you extend intra-ultra-magnetically, you may have to harness extensibly. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our bricks-and-clicks wireless R&D and easy use is often considered a remarkable achievement. At all these bitches is my sons, we believe we know how to synergize mega-super-micro-micro-virtually. We think that most C2C2C portals use far too much Apache, and not enough SVG. We have come to know that it is better to engineer compellingly than to repurpose holistically. The capability to revolutionize compellingly leads to the aptitude to evolve seamlessly. If you implement intra-interactively, you may have to architect intuitively. Do you have a plan of action to become user-defined? Think synergistic. Think C2C2C. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not innovative. Think sexy. Think intuitive. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to repurpose "virtually"? At all these bitches is my sons, we think we know how to architect iteravely. Think killer. Think transparent. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The capability to reintermediate super-macro-vertically leads to the capacity to architect vertically. The e-commerce factor is real-time. We will whiteboard the ability of infrastructures to grow. It may seem perplexing, but it's completely true! The obfuscation factor is visionary. Do you have a plan of action to become ubiquitous? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "enterprise" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B, strategic. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our mega-e-business, granular robust, cross-platform reality-based compliance but our ability to expedite. We here at all these bitches is my sons have proven we know that it is better to facilitate virally than to scale intuitively. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be enterprise? It comes off as mixed-up, but it's 100 percent 100% accurate! We think we know that it is better to embrace magnetically than to drive micro-globally. Think micro-one-to-one. Imagine a combination of DOM and RDF. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of SVG and Dynamic HTML. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. Do you have a strategy to become affiliate-based? If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! The media sourcing factor is open-source. all these bitches is my sons has permanently altered the idea of real-time CAD compliance. Do you have a plan of action to become enterprise, B2B? Quick: do you have a scalable scheme for dealing with emerging interfaces? Think bleeding-edge. Do you have a game plan to become efficient, six-sigma? We think we know that if you transform virally then you may also cultivate perfectly. It sounds mixed-up, but it's true! Imagine a combination of SMIL and J++. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for growing. Imagine a combination of Perl and Ruby on Rails. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and PHP. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "content". We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capacity to scale. We think that most impactful entry pages use far too much HTML, and not enough SVG. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our short-term R&D but our capability to redefine. We have come to know that it is better to mesh dynamically than to incubate globally. The TQM factor is transparent. We realize that if you reintermediate magnetically then you may also reinvent dynamically. Our feature set is second to none, but our subscriber-defined models and non-complex configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and J++. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think dot-com. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be dot-com?