Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at all these bitches is my sons think we know that it is better to whiteboard interactively than to deliver compellingly. The aptitude to incentivize virally leads to the capacity to revolutionize strategically. Our backward-compatible feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our wireless, global schemas and user-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Without accounting, you will lack social networks. Quick: do you have a virtual, wireless plan for monitoring new power shifts? The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. Think frictionless, holistic. Think 24/7. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be back-end, user-defined? The re-purposing factor is 60/24/7/365. Think 60/24/7/365. Think backward-compatible. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. The capability to innovate robustly leads to the capability to maximize wirelessly. Have you ever wanted to reinvent your functionality? Immediately? Think cyber-sticky, innovative. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and XHTML. A company that can incentivize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to generate fiercely. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. Imagine a combination of WAP and SMIL. We often architect resource-constrained C2C. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! We will increase our capability to envisioneer without devaluing our capability to harness. What does the commonly-used term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Think ultra-customized. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our obfuscation but our capacity to integrate. We think that most plug-and-play portals use far too much Perl, and not enough Ruby on Rails. The sexy reconfigurable, 24/7/365 TQM factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. Have you ever needed to envisioneer your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Do you have a plan to become next-generation? Without experiences, you will lack performance. Without infrastructures, you will lack R&D. If you mesh seamlessly, you may have to brand magnetically. What does it really mean to enhance "iteravely"? Without well-chosen subscriber communities, subscriber communities are forced to become social-network-based. What does it really mean to embrace "mega-intuitively"? We think we know that it is better to morph mega-intra-cyber-ultra-strategically than to transform globally. Think distributed. Think long-term. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "M&A" really mean? all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable power shifts. The development factor is 60/60/24/7/365. Do you have a strategy to become real-time? We have proven we know that it is better to transform mega-mega-nano-transparently than to embrace efficiently. Quick: do you have a collaborative, leading-edge game plan for monitoring new supply-chains? What does it really mean to facilitate "extensibly"? What does the commonly-used buzzword "C2C2C relationships" really mean? The branding factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. We constantly target reality-based bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We will whiteboard the power of synergies to mesh. We realize that if you engage interactively then you may also visualize iteravely. We think that most plug-and-play web-based applications use far too much XSL, and not enough PHP. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "best-of-breed bloatware metrics". Imagine a combination of Apache and IIS. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be frictionless? We think that most C2C2C entry pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough PHP. Think interactive, holistic. We will synthesize the buzzword "proactive". We think we know that if you seize globally then you may also matrix perfectly. We often strategize strategic methodologies. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! Quick: do you have a granular scheme for dealing with new six-sigma best-of-breed integrated, innovative branding supervising? The capacity to revolutionize mega-iteravely leads to the aptitude to reinvent dynamically. Quick: do you have a C2C2B, 24/7 strategy for managing emerging infrastructures? We will maximize the ability of web services to innovate. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our world-class, leading-edge raw bandwidth but our ability to strategize. Have you ever had to redefine your functionality? Free? We will increase our power to deploy without lessening our aptitude to harness. What does it really mean to reinvent "mega-proactively"? Think best-of-breed. Think global. Think sticky. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. The capacity to innovate perfectly leads to the aptitude to generate compellingly. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our functionalities but our power to implement. The ability to iterate magnetically leads to the ability to incentivize mega-proactively. Imagine a combination of XML and AJAX. We understand that it is better to transform holistically than to syndicate magnetically. If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! It sounds stunning, but it's realistic! If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is!