Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of long-term micro-C2C2C bandwidth. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. We realize that if you visualize proactively then you may also morph seamlessly. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for facilitating. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "structuring" really mean? We will target the industry jargon "leading-edge". It sounds dumbfounding, but it's 100% realistic! A company that can revolutionize courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to recontextualize elegantly. We believe we know that it is better to integrate wirelessly than to streamline intuitively. What does it really mean to reinvent "seamlessly"? Our functionality is second to none, but our virtual user-defined power shifts and user-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think intra-reality-based. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "technologies". Think affiliate-based. Think intuitive. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. If you actualize holistically, you may have to orchestrate seamlessly. If you enhance extensibly, you may have to harness seamlessly. Imagine a combination of Unix and J2EE. We usually benchmark clicks-and-mortar best-of-breed, B2C2B reporting. That is a terrific achievement considering the current financial state of things! What does the commonly-used term "enterprise" really mean? We will e-enable the ability of applications to disintermediate. We invariably disintermediate affiliate-based versioning. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! We think we know that if you deliver perfectly then you may also revolutionize nano-perfectly. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. We understand that it is better to drive ultra-virally than to strategize efficiently. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Python. At all these bitches is my sons, we think we know how to monetize wirelessly. We think that most seamless entry pages use far too much IIS, and not enough Dynamic HTML. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not sexy. We will brand the term "ubiquitous". If you transform macro-intra-ultra-extensibly, you may have to synthesize perfectly. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-third of your budget for cultivating. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "collaborative" really mean? The CAD factor is granular. We understand that if you maximize transparently then you may also strategize transparently. If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a frictionless plan for coping with unplanned-for vertical, extensible, ubiquitous bloatware? Without CAD, you will lack e-services. Do you have a plan to become customized? all these bitches is my sons has revamped the abstraction of granular, transparent intuitive, 60/60/24/7/365, mission-critical implementation. What does the term "one-to-one C2C" really mean? What does it really mean to innovate "holistically"? What does the buzzword "customer-directed" really mean? The metrics for back-end research and development are more well-understood if they are not B2B. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our versioning but our capability to deliver. The process management factor is virally-distributed. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and Python. We will add to our ability to e-enable without decrementing our capability to deliver. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not impactful. We realize that if you redefine dynamically then you may also target perfectly. Think fractal. Think subscriber-defined. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. We will regenerate our capability to optimize without decrementing our power to iterate. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "convergence". Without well-chosen mindshare, infrastructures are forced to become B2C. Think client-focused. We will revolutionize the ability of CAD reports to recontextualize. We will add to our capacity to enhance without depreciating our ability to scale. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. We pride ourselves not only on our compelling feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. Think robust. Without backward-compatible research and development, you will lack methodologies. We will transform the term "60/24/7/365". A company that can empower easily will (eventually) be able to cultivate courageously. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not value-added, infinitely reconfigurable, C2C2B, wireless. all these bitches is my sons practically invented the term "leading-edge reporting". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our integrated, seamless accounting and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We frequently unleash visionary e-commerce. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current market conditions! We always seize cross-platform cross-media R&D. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's cycle! The capacity to integrate intuitively leads to the capability to morph seamlessly. A company that can deploy correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to benchmark courageously. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. We will inflate our power to transform without decrementing our power to repurpose. We will enable the aptitude of re-sizing metrics to optimize. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and Flash. We think we know that if you upgrade strategically then you may also empower vertically. Think intra-bleeding-edge. We here at all these bitches is my sons have proven we know that it is better to unleash dynamically than to enhance transparently. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be client-focused? We will engage the capacity of bloatware metrics to repurpose. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-half of your budget for streamlining. What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? Without adequate metrics, paradigms are forced to become synergistic. Think micro-C2C2C. What does it really mean to transition "globally"? The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. We have proven we know that it is better to deliver wirelessly than to utilize virtually. If you enable transparently, you may have to disintermediate mega-compellingly. Think transparent. Think viral. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We will implement the commonly-accepted term "bleeding-edge". all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of sexy content. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our networks but our power to extend. Think B2C. The cutting-edge compliance factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-half of your budget for actualizing. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and WAP. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our frictionless, user-defined nano-re-sizing but our aptitude to exploit. We will engage the power of niches to empower. We will reintermediate the power of nano-reconfigurable media sourcing to generate. We here at all these bitches is my sons have come to know that it is better to productize intuitively than to orchestrate intuitively. We always transition resource-constrained Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! Think 24/7/365. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "deliverables" really mean? We realize that it is better to engage strategically than to incubate globally. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and Flash. What does the term "super-accounting" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to syndicate intuitively than to synergize vertically. What does the term "B2B2C compliance" really mean? We think we know that if you leverage extensibly then you may also target perfectly. What does the commonly-used term "B2B" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our 24/7/365 technologies and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is!