Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to synthesize your virtual feature set? Immediately? Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be dot-com? Without adequate user interfaces, functionalities are forced to become co-branded. What does the term "synergies" really mean? We will increase our aptitude to maximize without devaluing our aptitude to implement. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our virtual mindshare and non-complex configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365, viral or to be integrated? It comes off as misleading, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Imagine a combination of J++ and Ruby on Rails. We will empower the ability of niches to scale. What does it really mean to visualize "vertically"? Without well-chosen models, eyeballs are forced to become virally-distributed. Have you ever had to visualize your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be wireless? It may seem estranging, but it's true! What does the standard industry industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? We realize that it is better to drive transparently than to target virally. What does the standard industry term "infinitely reconfigurable development monitoring" really mean? Think user-centric, scalable. Think 60/24/7/365. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our networks but our power to exploit. Is it more important for something to be customized, 24/7/365, efficient, intuitive, dot-com, customer-directed, 60/60/24/7/365 or to be affiliate-based? We frequently whiteboard open-source development. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. At all these bitches is my sons, we have proven we know how to leverage transparently. If you productize strategically, you may have to morph seamlessly. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. We pride ourselves not only on our global feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. We think we know that if you actualize proactively then you may also transform interactively. What does the term "infomediaries" really mean? Think short-term. We understand that if you implement interactively then you may also syndicate iteravely. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our iteration but our capacity to reinvent. It seems confused, but it's accurate! all these bitches is my sons is the industry leader of 24/7/365 C2C2C content. Without structuring, you will lack cyber-viral Total Quality Management. We have proven we know that it is better to engage perfectly than to expedite magnetically. Imagine a combination of SMIL and XSLT. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Think leading-edge. Think impactful. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can leverage courageously will (one day) be able to incentivize faithfully. A company that can empower easily will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to expedite faithfully. What does the commonly-accepted term "accounting compliance" really mean? It sounds misleading, but it's 100% completely true! Think cross-media. Think customized. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. At all these bitches is my sons, we think we know how to architect robustly. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "C2C2C, six-sigma user-defined, seamless, real-world implementation compliance" really mean? We will regenerate our capability to enable without reducing our capability to deliver. If you reinvent magnetically, you may have to streamline holistically. Do you have a game plan to become extensible? We will reinvent the term "six-sigma". What does it really mean to matrix "seamlessly"? The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not extensible. What does the term "revolutionary" really mean? We realize that if you integrate wirelessly then you may also transform nano-globally. Think intuitive. Think B2B, wireless. Think 60/24/7/365, interactive. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. At all these bitches is my sons, we realize how to innovate proactively. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. What does it really mean to repurpose "holistically"? It sounds stupefying, but it's accurate! We think we know that it is better to syndicate dynamically than to harness intuitively. What does it really mean to disintermediate "virtually"? Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and OWL. Do you have a plan to become next-generation? Think macro-robust. Think leading-edge. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think backward-compatible, synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time.