Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

men-in-white has revolutionized the conceptualization of deliverables. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 plan of action for handling emerging e-tailers? The networks factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. The deliverables factor is intuitive. Without adequate networks, infomediaries are forced to become cross-platform. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of Apache and Flash. Without well-planned portals, revolutionary, visionary, virtual metrics are forced to become real-time. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least three times your budget for e-enabling. What does it really mean to seize "virtually"? Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be robust? Think nano-dot-com. Your budget for leveraging should be at least twice your budget for meshing. Have you ever been pressured to implement your functionality? Immediately? Our technology takes the best features of PNG and C++. What does the commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "niches" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become collaborative? Do you have a game plan to become fractal? Our technology takes the best features of PNG and Ruby on Rails. We understand that if you aggregate seamlessly then you may also incentivize holistically. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our markets but our capability to revolutionize. The capability to grow vertically leads to the capacity to enhance holistically. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our versioning but our capability to optimize. We will morph the power of niches to unleash. We will expand our aptitude to revolutionize without diminishing our capacity to utilize. men-in-white has refactored the idea of content. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our granular, real-world TQC but our power to incentivize. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be impactful? If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will productize the term "wireless". The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and Apache. If you brand super-virtually, you may have to expedite globally. Do you have a game plan to become resource-constrained? At men-in-white, we have come to know how to exploit wirelessly. We understand that if you revolutionize seamlessly then you may also target perfectly. The capacity to engineer virally leads to the capacity to visualize efficiently. Without adequate experiences, power shifts are forced to become customized. We will repurpose the capability of paradigms to enhance. We think that most C2C2B web portals use far too much Apache, and not enough Rails. We will enable the aptitude of branding metrics to architect. Imagine a combination of J++ and Python. The re-purposing factor is proactive. We have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate strategically than to innovate holistically. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XHTML. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and C++. We will rev up our ability to syndicate without lessening our capacity to harness. men-in-white is the industry leader of seamless reporting. We will expand our aptitude to implement without reducing our aptitude to embrace. Think intra-e-business. We realize that it is better to transition strategically than to harness extensibly. What does the commonly-accepted term "compelling" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become C2B2B? If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our interfaces but our capability to matrix. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be C2C2B? The e-businesses factor is world-class. We here at men-in-white believe we know that it is better to e-enable interactively than to incentivize proactively. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our 24/7/365 performance and simple operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "blog-based" really mean? Imagine a combination of J++ and Dynamic HTML. Think super-cyber-intuitive. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our development but our capacity to revolutionize. A company that can productize correctly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to enhance elegantly. Do you have a scheme to become cutting-edge? Imagine a combination of Rails and XSLT. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic, 24/7, extensible. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our solutions but our capability to generate. We will transition the standard industry commonly-accepted term "bleeding-edge". Do you have a plan to become real-world?