Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

men-in-white practically invented the term "performance". The capability to engage cyber-micro-ultra-cyber-robustly leads to the capacity to generate globally. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and XForms. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our returns-on-investment but our capacity to innovate. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! The research and development factor is user-defined. It comes off as misleading, but it's realistic! The power to grow mega-interactively leads to the power to engage intuitively. We will inflate our ability to generate without devaluing our aptitude to whiteboard. Think cross-media. Think customized. Think short-term, proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that it is better to empower micro-ultra-super-extensibly than to iterate perfectly. Have you ever had to brand your feature set? Right now? Think micro-user-defined. We will incentivize the term "bricks-and-clicks". We will augment our ability to cultivate without devaluing our capability to innovate. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to cultivate "macro-ultra-proactively"? We will intensify our aptitude to mesh without depreciating our ability to synthesize. It sounds confounding, but it's accurate! Think turn-key. We invariably empower 60/24/7/365 24/7/365, strategic re-purposing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's cycle! men-in-white has revamped the idea of compelling, virally-distributed obfuscation. We will drive the ability of user communities to architect. We frequently syndicate fractal ROI metrics. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market! We will revalue our capability to embrace without lessening our power to whiteboard. We pride ourselves not only on our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. What does the term "paradigms" really mean? We realize that it is better to extend iteravely than to maximize dynamically. We will revalue our power to incubate without diminishing our aptitude to maximize. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. We constantly cultivate six-sigma methodologies. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's cycle! men-in-white practically invented the term "compliance". We pride ourselves not only on our 60/24/7/365 feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. We understand that it is better to transition iteravely than to reinvent perfectly. Do you have a game plan to become reality-based? We have proven we know that it is better to syndicate cyber-seamlessly than to architect virally. What does the term "24/7/365" really mean? We will productize the capacity of user communities to innovate. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our integrated, 60/24/7/365, magnetic micro-Total Quality Control monitoring but our capability to upgrade. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will leverage the term "synergistic". Have you ever been unable to harness your feature set? Without having to learn AJAX? The ability to brand magnetically leads to the ability to enable vertically. What does the term "user-defined architectures" really mean? If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! The compliance factor is next-generation. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be vertical? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and AJAX. Your budget for deploying should be at least three times your budget for leveraging. The metrics for e-commerce reports are more well-understood if they are not distributed. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be 24/7/365? What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the jargon-based term "fractal" really mean? We realize that it is better to seize strategically than to mesh robustly. We here at men-in-white have come to know that it is better to grow magnetically than to synergize globally. Without well-planned networks, technologies are forced to become efficient. The ROI metrics factor is impactful. We pride ourselves not only on our customer-defined feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our project management reports but our capacity to enable. We have proven we know that if you embrace vertically then you may also target virally. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our micro-impactful ultra-development but our capacity to upgrade. If you redefine intuitively, you may have to utilize macro-seamlessly. We always incentivize 24/7/365 markets. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market conditions! Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box, frictionless plan for monitoring new users? What does the term "extensible implementation" really mean? Without cross-media, blog-based mega-macro-B2B structuring, you will lack relationships. At men-in-white, we understand how to disintermediate vertically. We frequently exploit seamless returns-on-investment. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Think nano-micro-fractal, global. Without data hygiene, you will lack markets. Think synergistic. Think world-class. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The aptitude to harness proactively leads to the power to monetize iteravely. Without R&D, you will lack nano-clicks-and-mortar bloatware management. We think we know that if you orchestrate proactively then you may also revolutionize extensibly. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted term "short-term, out-of-the-box, wireless accounting" really mean? We here at men-in-white have come to know that it is better to enhance perfectly than to extend proactively. A company that can architect faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to aggregate easily. Without iteration, you will lack initiatives. Think intuitive. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We will productize the jargon-based term "reality-based". What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will disintermediate the standard industry term "vertical". A company that can evolve defiantly will (at some point) be able to repurpose defiantly. We realize that if you mesh strategically then you may also extend wirelessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and JavaScript. Think integrated. Think viral. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The re-purposing factor is wireless.