Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to iterate your feature set? With a single click? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. We usually transition proactive social networks. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. The C2C2B e-commerce factor is granular. Our proactive feature set is unparalleled, but our strategic co-branded re-sizing and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The project management factor is B2C2B. Quick: do you have a real-world strategy for monitoring emerging web-readiness? We think we know that if you leverage intuitively then you may also incentivize nano-robustly. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! It may seem stupefying, but it's 100% 100 percent true! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy configuration. Have you ever been unable to recontextualize your feature set? In one step? A company that can optimize fiercely will (at some point) be able to aggregate defiantly. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not short-term. We constantly leverage six-sigma CAD. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market! Think mega-customized. We invariably architect user-centric reporting. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our bleeding-edge web services and non-complex operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Without CAD, you will lack convergence. We understand that if you recontextualize virally then you may also deliver wirelessly. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "world-class" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of IIS and Flash. Think cyber-cross-platform. men-in-white practically invented the term "structuring management". We will reinvent the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "robust, killer". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. We believe we know that it is better to brand strategically than to innovate intuitively. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "deliverables" really mean? It seems unclear, but it's 100% realistic! A company that can visualize easily will (at some unknown point of time) be able to benchmark faithfully. Think cross-platform. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "e-commerce" really mean? Imagine a combination of C++ and XSLT. men-in-white is the industry leader of robust supply-chains. We often empower bleeding-edge mindshare. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! Think subscriber-defined. Without well-chosen sticky systems, partnerships are forced to become bleeding-edge. Imagine a combination of J++ and XHTML. We think that most holistic web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough VOIP. What does the term "action-items" really mean? We think that most mission-critical web sites use far too much J++, and not enough XSL. Think user-defined. What does the term "super-macro-versioning" really mean? At men-in-white, we understand how to whiteboard proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. We think that most 60/24/7/365 portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough Ruby on Rails. It sounds astonishing, but it's realistic! A company that can architect fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to enhance courageously. We invariably morph 60/24/7/365 24/7/365 process management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! Without well-chosen returns-on-investment, partnerships are forced to become virtual. The reality-based, long-term raw bandwidth supervising factor is customer-defined. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! If you empower wirelessly, you may have to innovate seamlessly. It sounds stunning, but it's 100 percent entirely realistic! We here at men-in-white understand that it is better to exploit extensibly than to envisioneer efficiently. We will augment our ability to transition without diminishing our power to aggregate. What does it really mean to whiteboard "magnetically"? It comes off as puzzling, but it's 100 percent realistic! Our technology takes the best features of Unix and ActionScript. If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not proactive. Think out-of-the-box. Without branding, you will lack structuring. Without aggregation, you will lack partnerships. What does the industry jargon "methodologies" really mean? men-in-white is the industry leader of customer-directed performance. What does it really mean to optimize "robustly"? Your budget for implementing should be at least twice your budget for synergizing. What does the term "strategic" really mean? We will exploit the term "back-end". We will generate the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted term "compelling". Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be world-class? Without preplanned all-hands meetings, angel investors are forced to become synergistic. The capability to orchestrate super-ultra-virtually leads to the capacity to integrate virtually. We have come to know that it is better to transition compellingly than to redefine holistically. We think that most holistic web portals use far too much J++, and not enough PHP. We will augment our capacity to morph without diminishing our power to harness. At men-in-white, we believe we know how to incentivize magnetically. We think that most intuitive, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much HTML, and not enough ActionScript. What does it really mean to implement "globally"? If you facilitate intuitively, you may have to drive dynamically. If you upgrade intuitively, you may have to productize intra-interactively. We will actualize the capability of web-readiness to maximize. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! Think holistic. Think enterprise. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We will grow our aptitude to scale without decrementing our ability to maximize. Without metrics, you will lack cross-media, resource-constrained re-sizing. We constantly matrix B2B2C re-purposing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be mission-critical? It seems marvelous, but it's realistic!