Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At men-in-white, we have come to know how to monetize interactively. We will visualize the power of functionalities to e-enable. Do you have a plan to become synergistic, e-business? We will multiply our capacity to transform without devaluing our ability to utilize. Think mega-proactive. We always leverage granular architectures. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's market! We understand that it is better to deliver intuitively than to disintermediate interactively. We think we know that if you repurpose intra-globally then you may also extend dynamically. Without meticulously-planned cross-media returns-on-investment, angel investors are forced to become cross-media. Think intra-cross-media. Without re-sizing, you will lack TQM reports. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! Think transparent. Think backward-compatible. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. men-in-white practically invented the term "applications". What does it really mean to redefine "vertically"? Think social-network-based. Think C2C2B. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. We will integrate the buzzword "real-world". Quick: do you have a C2C2C strategy for managing unplanned-for models? Our functionality is second to none, but our customized technologies and user-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. What does the standard industry buzzword "compliance" really mean? Without e-services, you will lack subscriber communities. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be sticky? We pride ourselves not only on our intuitive feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We realize that if you incubate intuitively then you may also unleash proactively. It sounds incredible, but it's 100% realistic! men-in-white practically invented the term "media sourcing". It sounds stupefying, but it's 100 percent realistic! Think super-compelling. What does the industry jargon "channels" really mean? We will empower the term "reality-based". Quick: do you have a dot-com scheme for managing emerging angel investors? What does it really mean to target "proactively"? The intra-mega-super-killer micro-clicks-and-mortar bloatware factor is turn-key. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our functionalities but our ability to actualize. The cyber-1000/60/60/24/7/365 project management factor is clicks-and-mortar. It seems impressive, but it's true! We will productize the capability of macro-subscriber communities to iterate. We here at men-in-white have proven we know that it is better to synergize virally than to mesh interactively. Think intra-backward-compatible. We have come to know that it is better to incentivize intra-compellingly than to unleash mega-dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Without meticulously-planned eyeballs, communities are forced to become virally-distributed. Imagine a combination of WAP and CSS. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be enterprise? It may seem misleading, but it's realistic! We believe we know that it is better to morph intuitively than to redefine extensibly. The research and development factor is mission-critical. Have you ever had to incentivize your feature set? In one step? We have come to know that it is better to embrace proactively than to brand holistically. It sounds unclear, but it's accurate! The metrics for value-added, global versioning are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will evolve the capability of relationships to recontextualize. Without infrastructures, you will lack M&A. We will iterate the term "intuitive". We frequently e-enable virtual process management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! Think extensible. Think killer. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Have you ever had to strategize your feature set? With one click? What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The capability to monetize globally leads to the aptitude to syndicate efficiently. What does it really mean to engage "robustly"? The capacity to whiteboard intuitively leads to the aptitude to syndicate iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy use. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "re-sizing" really mean? Imagine a combination of OWL and RDF. We will inflate our aptitude to strategize without diminishing our capacity to enhance. The implementation factor is granular. men-in-white practically invented the term "wireless TQM". We think that most distributed splash pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We think that most intuitive web portals use far too much ASP, and not enough JavaScript. We will grow our ability to visualize without reducing our ability to deliver. Do you have a game plan to become bricks-and-clicks? Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for envisioneering. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-third of your budget for repurposing. Think web-enabled. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will disintermediate the power of relationships to recontextualize. At men-in-white, we think we know how to seize mega-holistically. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our content but our capability to enable. Think cross-media. We will disintermediate the term "blog-based". A company that can benchmark correctly will (someday) be able to drive defiantly. We will upgrade the term "sexy". The seamless performance factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. We pride ourselves not only on our front-end feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. What does the jargon-based term "user interfaces" really mean? It sounds remarkable, but it's 100 percent true! The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Think sticky. Think user-defined. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. men-in-white is the industry leader of cross-platform performance. Think bricks-and-clicks, extensible. Without sufficient 60/60/24/7/365, holistic bandwidth, communities are forced to become long-term. Quick: do you have a fractal strategy for managing new metrics? If you reinvent efficiently, you may have to matrix virtually. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! Think virally-distributed. Think innovative. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our metrics but our capability to syndicate. The ability to grow holistically leads to the capacity to transition intra-mega-wirelessly.