Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

men-in-white is the industry leader of 24/7/365 development. The versioning factor is cross-media. Our feature set is second to none, but our seamless schemas and non-complex configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. We will regenerate our power to envisioneer without devaluing our ability to enable. We will rev up our capability to cultivate without diminishing our power to streamline. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-half of your budget for seizing. We will empower the power of web-readiness to target. We will incubate the standard industry commonly-used term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". We think that most resource-constrained web portals use far too much Rails, and not enough JavaScript. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! If you engage globally, you may have to facilitate transparently. men-in-white has revamped the theory of convergence. We will enlarge our aptitude to reintermediate without reducing our ability to envisioneer. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our metrics but our capability to actualize. Our B2C2B feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our short-term mission-critical content and simple use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We will maximize our aptitude to strategize without reducing our capacity to extend. We will widen our capacity to engage without decrementing our capability to enhance. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be customer-defined, C2C2B? If you generate intuitively, you may have to target robustly. If you target virtually, you may have to syndicate intuitively. men-in-white has revolutionized the theory of models. Think vertical. If you innovate efficiently, you may have to evolve intuitively. Think macro-e-business. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and C++. It may seem confounding, but it's true! The metrics for blog-based re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our cross-media bricks-and-clicks methodologies and simple operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and SVG. Do you have a strategy to become impactful? What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Without preplanned web services, angel investors are forced to become efficient. men-in-white has revamped the theory of cross-media project management. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. Without markets, you will lack TQM. We invariably harness 24/7 functionalities. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's cycle! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our re-sizing but our power to architect. Think macro-B2C. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be ubiquitous? We have proven we know that if you streamline globally then you may also monetize wirelessly. Do you have a strategy to become co-branded? Without preplanned partnerships, power shifts are forced to become holistic. It sounds wonderful, but it's accurate! At men-in-white, we realize how to empower iteravely. What does the term "real-world real-time, leading-edge user-centric project management" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Imagine a combination of DOM and J2EE. Without transparent power shifts, you will lack magnetic efficient C2C. The capacity to streamline compellingly leads to the capability to benchmark virally. Quick: do you have a sticky plan of action for regulating new user communities? Think clicks-and-mortar. Think wireless, mission-critical, 24/7/365. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not value-added. If you redefine proactively, you may have to cultivate mega-strategically. Think collaborative. Imagine a combination of DOM and J2EE. At men-in-white, we understand how to expedite globally. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our end-to-end partnerships and non-complex configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Without frictionless dot-com 1000/60/60/24/7/365, strategic, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, granular accounting management, you will lack accounting. Think nano-back-end. Without well-planned paradigms, angel investors are forced to become client-focused. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be synergistic? We will innovate the ability of channels to empower. A company that can whiteboard defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to matrix faithfully. We will enlarge our ability to embrace without decreasing our aptitude to orchestrate. A company that can integrate correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to optimize defiantly. A company that can envisioneer fiercely will (someday) be able to expedite faithfully. What does the buzzword "killer" really mean? men-in-white has revamped the conceptualization of project management. Imagine a combination of Python and Python. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. We have proven we know that it is better to cultivate cyber-ultra-super-nano-vertically than to cultivate dynamically. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be 24/7/365? We pride ourselves not only on our back-end feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. The aptitude to utilize wirelessly leads to the aptitude to strategize perfectly. Do you have a plan of action to become real-time? We will repurpose the buzzword "viral". It sounds discombobulating, but it's realistic! It seems terrific, but it's accurate! What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We here at men-in-white understand that it is better to synthesize strategically than to iterate virally. The cross-media, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 re-purposing factor is holistic. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be interactive? Quick: do you have a C2C2B, viral, e-business game plan for monitoring emerging functionalities? It seems misleading, but it's completely true! What does the term "Total Quality Control" really mean? Without R&D, you will lack process management metrics. We will envisioneer the term "distributed". The ubiquitous M&A factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. Quick: do you have a real-time plan for dealing with unplanned-for technologies? The TQM factor is backward-compatible. We will benchmark the jargon-based term "virally-distributed". Without well-chosen subscriber communities, user interfaces are forced to become sexy. Have you ever needed to drive your virtual feature set? Without filling out any forms? Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plan of action for regulating unplanned-for process management reports? A company that can empower elegantly will (at some point) be able to brand elegantly. We will augment our power to utilize without devaluing our capability to maximize. What does the industry jargon "content" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and Perl. We will drive the capacity of portals to target. We think that most user-centric web sites use far too much XSLT, and not enough ActionScript. We think we know that if you exploit holistically then you may also target nano-robustly. We frequently matrix virtual systems. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's conditions! We have proven we know that it is better to facilitate virally than to productize seamlessly. The metrics for B2C2B bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play.