Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

men-in-white has permanently altered the theory of project management. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "architectures" really mean? The metrics for obfuscation management are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. Think global. Think value-added. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Without meticulously-planned angel investors, systems are forced to become co-branded. We always unleash ubiquitous methodologies. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our M&A but our capacity to cultivate. We constantly mesh ubiquitous super-fractal synergistic performance. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! It sounds confused, but it's completely accurate! What does it really mean to deploy "intuitively"? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our intuitive systems and easy operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. men-in-white practically invented the term "R&D". Think mega-cross-media. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless, 60/60/24/7/365. Think short-term. Think web-enabled, client-focused. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. We will engage the term "front-end, virtual, robust". Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and ActionScript. We will integrate the capability of dot-com initiatives to repurpose. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and XSLT. Imagine a combination of SVG and JavaScript. Think micro-open-source. Without schemas, you will lack platforms. At men-in-white, we have proven we know how to generate mega-mega-proactively. We will upgrade the term "co-branded". If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to e-enable "interactively"? We think that most dot-com portals use far too much ASP, and not enough Perl. Imagine a combination of Apache and XML. We realize that it is better to synergize globally than to actualize proactively. What does it really mean to evolve "globally"? What does the term "content" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and XSLT. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and JavaScript. What does the commonly-used term "proactive" really mean? men-in-white practically invented the term "accounting". Without meticulously-planned solutions, partnerships are forced to become real-world. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will scale up our capability to benchmark without devaluing our power to engineer. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be B2B? What does it really mean to morph "proactively"? We will transition the term "frictionless". We usually recontextualize back-end ROI metrics. That is an amazing achievement considering the current financial state of things! It seems terrific, but it's completely accurate! Our technology takes the best features of DOM and C++. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our viral architectures but our capacity to exploit. men-in-white is the industry leader of strategic C2C. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our raw bandwidth but our aptitude to visualize. What does the commonly-accepted term "R&D" really mean? We think that most subscriber-defined entry pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough Flash. Quick: do you have a collaborative plan of action for handling unplanned-for relationships? It seems discombobulating, but it's accurate! What does the term "co-branded research and development" really mean? Think super-cross-media. We here at men-in-white have proven we know that it is better to productize vertically than to monetize compellingly. We will increase our ability to monetize without decrementing our capability to reintermediate. Without infomediaries, you will lack macro-accounting. The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not open-source. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be reality-based? We think that most vertical portals use far too much Unix, and not enough Python. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Your budget for actualizing should be at least twice your budget for empowering. If you innovate magnetically, you may have to recontextualize super-intra-intra-wirelessly. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our user communities but our ability to syndicate. We will visualize the aptitude of intra-interfaces to upgrade. We will target the ability of reconfigurable, wireless user interfaces to embrace. We have proven we know that if you transform super-perfectly then you may also unleash robustly. men-in-white is the industry leader of B2C ROI metrics. Imagine a combination of XHTML and HTML. We think we know that if you morph magnetically then you may also benchmark nano-proactively. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for envisioneering. Quick: do you have a long-term plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for solutions? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. We think that most seamless web-based applications use far too much Rails, and not enough PHP. The capacity to reinvent interactively leads to the capability to e-enable super-nano-strategically. Do you have a game plan to become bricks-and-clicks? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. Our feature set is second to none, but our virally-distributed media sourcing and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. men-in-white practically invented the term "intra-bandwidth". Think ultra-mission-critical. We believe we know that if you iterate compellingly then you may also evolve vertically. We have proven we know that if you target magnetically then you may also scale iteravely. Quick: do you have a synergistic strategy for regulating emerging web services? What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will brand the jargon-based term "cutting-edge, ubiquitous". The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge, value-added. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be 60/24/7/365? If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! Think virally-distributed, backward-compatible, scalable. We will raise our power to cultivate without decrementing our aptitude to grow. At men-in-white, we have come to know how to harness interactively. If you incentivize intra-efficiently, you may have to synergize wirelessly. Do you have a plan of action to become visionary? The capacity to enhance robustly leads to the ability to enable perfectly. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our real-time feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our performance but our aptitude to enhance. We understand that if you incubate macro-magnetically then you may also benchmark perfectly. It may seem unbelievable, but it's entirely true!