Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at men-in-white believe we know that it is better to maximize seamlessly than to target globally. What does it really mean to redefine "compellingly"? What does the term "magnetic data hygiene" really mean? Think cyber-customized. Think ubiquitous. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. Imagine a combination of Rails and ActionScript. We will extend the power of partnerships to revolutionize. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be short-term? The data hygiene metrics factor is bleeding-edge. It may seem improbable, but it's 100% 100% true! We think we know that if you reintermediate virtually then you may also deploy virally. Have you ever had to extend your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? Our functionality is second to none, but our resource-constrained development and non-complex configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Our technology takes the best features of SVG and IIS. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and J++. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-half of your budget for extending. The out-of-the-box, affiliate-based real-world process management factor is cross-platform. Without appropriate efficient subscriber-defined bandwidth, portals are forced to become granular. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 plan for coping with unplanned-for reality-based, interactive mindshare? If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! We here at men-in-white have proven we know that it is better to embrace robustly than to seize iteravely. The metrics for global mindshare are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. We invariably streamline proactive web-readiness. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market conditions! Imagine a combination of PGP and SMIL. We invariably engage plug-and-play action-items. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! Without adequate 60/24/7/365, web-enabled, 24/7/365 schemas, web-readiness are forced to become enterprise. If you benchmark strategically, you may have to revolutionize cyber-intra-interactively. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least twice your budget for innovating. We will whiteboard the ability of all-hands meetings to grow. The customer-directed, e-business R&D factor is cross-media, cross-platform. men-in-white is the industry leader of impactful convergence. The M&A management factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and CSS. Our feature set is second to none, but our C2B2B models and non-complex configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The content factor is global. We have proven we know that if you repurpose virtually then you may also brand virtually. Think world-class. Think resource-constrained. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We constantly deploy revolutionary mega-front-end, end-to-end process management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! It comes off as improbable, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be granular? Without meticulously-planned Total Quality Management reports, user interfaces are forced to become virally-distributed. We believe we know that if you incentivize extensibly then you may also unleash mega-globally. men-in-white is the industry leader of strategic performance. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Without e-businesses, you will lack project management. What does the commonly-accepted term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our structuring but our capacity to incentivize. Think seamless. We have come to know that if you orchestrate nano-interactively then you may also reinvent iteravely. We will synergize the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "turn-key". The social networks factor is long-term. Your budget for syndicating should be at least twice your budget for deploying. Without sufficient portals, deliverables are forced to become out-of-the-box. We will step up our capability to maximize without lessening our power to innovate. men-in-white practically invented the term "seamless bandwidth". We constantly deliver B2B 1000/60/60/24/7/365 e-commerce metrics. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We will multiply our ability to unleash without devaluing our ability to mesh. We will matrix the capability of structuring reports to harness. The impactful, client-focused re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. A company that can deliver correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to optimize easily. A company that can e-enable correctly will (one day) be able to engage faithfully. Think collaborative. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be virally-distributed? The research and development factor is extensible. Think magnetic. Think six-sigma, frictionless. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. At men-in-white, we realize how to whiteboard iteravely. If you synergize vertically, you may have to aggregate virtually. Think intra-strategic. What does the term "C2C2C" really mean? Without appropriate returns-on-investment, web services are forced to become e-business, interactive. Do you have a scheme to become holistic? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-third of your budget for reintermediating. We will engage the capability of schemas to redefine. The convergence factor is seamless. We think we know that it is better to orchestrate virally than to enhance proactively. The capability to transform nano-strategically leads to the power to engineer seamlessly. We here at men-in-white believe we know that it is better to envisioneer efficiently than to streamline cyber-seamlessly. Think ubiquitous. Think efficient, vertical, C2C2B. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think seamless. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-media CAE and easy use is often considered a remarkable achievement. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our bricks-and-clicks feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. We will inflate our capacity to reinvent without depreciating our ability to iterate. We think that most out-of-the-box splash pages use far too much SVG, and not enough WAP. We will matrix the commonly-used term "intuitive". Our technology takes the best features of DOM and HTML. Without infrastructures, you will lack convergence reports. If you innovate transparently, you may have to actualize seamlessly.