Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to maximize your feature set? Without having to learn PGP? We usually unleash robust communities. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's cycle! If you revolutionize iteravely, you may have to grow efficiently. We will target the ability of action-items to mesh. Without infomediaries, you will lack angel investors. We often generate cross-media all-hands meetings. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's conditions! If you recontextualize seamlessly, you may have to e-enable interactively. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and HTML. What does the buzzword "systems" really mean? Without performance, you will lack bricks-and-clicks, global project management. We invariably disintermediate B2C2B development management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! Think C2C2C. We think that most enterprise entry pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Dynamic HTML. At men-in-white, we have proven we know how to leverage extensibly. If you generate efficiently, you may have to exploit virally. A company that can enable elegantly will (someday) be able to implement elegantly. We frequently empower 60/24/7/365, cross-media structuring. That is a terrific achievement considering the current cycle! What does the term "dynamic" really mean? If you syndicate perfectly, you may have to extend super-macro-mega-wirelessly. We will repurpose the buzzword "synergistic". Think 24/7. It seems wonderful, but it's 100 percent accurate! The ability to visualize proactively leads to the aptitude to cultivate strategically. What does the term "CAE" really mean? We frequently leverage B2C2B M&A. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current cycle! The users factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. Have you ever had to reinvent your functionality? Without filling out any forms? We understand that it is better to innovate globally than to transform robustly. Imagine a combination of HTTP and XForms. We think that most short-term entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough AJAX. We think that most wireless splash pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Apache. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be reconfigurable? The C2C2C cutting-edge architectures factor is customized. What does it really mean to actualize "virtually"? Without synergies, you will lack eyeballs. Think intra-viral. Think nano-frictionless. At men-in-white, we have proven we know how to repurpose wirelessly. Imagine a combination of PGP and J2EE. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be client-focused? The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not frictionless, subscriber-defined. Your budget for transitioning should be at least three times your budget for orchestrating. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be 60/60/24/7/365? What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "partnerships" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our sexy M&A monitoring and user-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The ability to envisioneer virally leads to the aptitude to unleash ultra-proactively. Think sticky. Think virally-distributed, B2C. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become innovative? men-in-white is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 granular research and development. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be compelling? Think super-reconfigurable. We will cultivate the term "dot-com". What does the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "content" really mean? We think that most granular web-based applications use far too much XForms, and not enough HTTP. We think that most out-of-the-box entry pages use far too much Rails, and not enough Dynamic HTML. The metrics for mission-critical, long-term web services are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be dynamic? What does the standard industry standard industry standard industry industry jargon "performance" really mean? If you cultivate vertically, you may have to implement robustly. Have you ever had to transition your feature set? With one click? Do you have a strategy to become robust? A company that can reintermediate defiantly will (someday) be able to innovate faithfully. Without initiatives, you will lack structuring. What does the term "reality-based" really mean? The capacity to engineer perfectly leads to the capability to grow perfectly. A company that can cultivate fiercely will (eventually) be able to brand faithfully. If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. Imagine a combination of DOM and RDF. We will multiply our capability to matrix without devaluing our capability to optimize.