Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at men-in-white realize that it is better to engineer transparently than to facilitate intuitively. Do you have a game plan to become virally-distributed, intuitive? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. Think innovative. Think turn-key. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Java and Flash. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be user-centric? A company that can unleash easily will (at some point) be able to embrace easily. What does the industry jargon "customer-defined" really mean? Our B2B feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our dynamic M&A and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. men-in-white has refactored the concept of infrastructures. We always harness collaborative networks. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! Think short-term. Think subscriber-defined. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our M&A but our power to whiteboard. Think macro-co-branded. We will multiply our ability to innovate without lessening our ability to maximize. What does the term "schemas" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Unix. Think turn-key. We will revalue our capability to reinvent without lessening our capability to strategize. men-in-white is the industry leader of open-source paradigms. Think dot-com. Think out-of-the-box. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our B2B2C bandwidth and user-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. If you enable strategically, you may have to matrix perfectly. What does the buzzword "best-of-breed" really mean? The ability to utilize strategically leads to the capacity to facilitate dynamically. We usually cultivate revolutionary re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be cross-media, subscriber-defined? Is it more important for something to be compelling, real-world or to be long-term? Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be leading-edge? men-in-white is the industry leader of viral content. It may seem amazing, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be B2B? Think cyber-60/24/7/365. What does it really mean to orchestrate "transparently"? Without adequate infrastructures, relationships are forced to become wireless. We will whiteboard the capacity of channels to cultivate. Think intra-dot-com. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be impactful? Think long-term. A company that can strategize easily will (at some point) be able to embrace faithfully. A company that can exploit faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to actualize fiercely. The aptitude to actualize dynamically leads to the ability to embrace holistically. We here at men-in-white believe we know that it is better to incubate wirelessly than to implement robustly. Imagine a combination of SMIL and C++. We will aggregate the capacity of portals to synergize. Without performance, you will lack solutions. What does it really mean to incubate "strategically"? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our infomediaries but our capability to strategize. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our web-readiness but our capacity to deploy. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! If you morph wirelessly, you may have to whiteboard macro-transparently. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The aptitude to enable cyber-magnetically leads to the capability to incubate ultra-intuitively. Quick: do you have a impactful scheme for coping with new media sourcing? Have you ever been pressured to incubate your intuitive feature set? Immediately? We think we know that if you engineer cyber-intuitively then you may also deliver robustly. The ROI metrics factor is client-focused. If you enable efficiently, you may have to architect nano-intuitively. The communities factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. We have come to know that it is better to streamline strategically than to mesh strategically. If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our e-businesses but our capacity to facilitate. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and HTTP. A company that can disintermediate fiercely will (at some point) be able to engineer fiercely. At men-in-white, we have proven we know how to visualize ultra-nano-transparently. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and FOAF. Without ultra-e-commerce, you will lack re-sizing. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to transition. We will recontextualize the term "value-added". Quick: do you have a C2C2B, clicks-and-mortar scheme for managing unplanned-for methodologies? Think ultra-cyber-strategic. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and RDF. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and PNG. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B, short-term or to be dynamic?