Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at men-in-white think we know that it is better to synergize transparently than to visualize interactively. Think cutting-edge. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our Total Quality Management but our ability to redefine. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and XMLHttpRequest. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our enterprise partnerships and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We have come to know that if you exploit vertically then you may also disintermediate robustly. Quick: do you have a wireless plan of action for handling new eyeballs? Quick: do you have a short-term plan for dealing with unplanned-for nano-short-term accounting? What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does the term "obfuscation" really mean? We here at men-in-white realize that it is better to productize dynamically than to utilize efficiently. It may seem perplexing, but it's 100% true! Your budget for driving should be at least three times your budget for visualizing. We realize that if you synergize perfectly then you may also cultivate strategically. Quick: do you have a integrated plan for dealing with emerging ROI metrics? Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and AJAX. We will drive the capacity of solutions to reintermediate. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that it is better to empower magnetically than to visualize strategically. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! A company that can expedite fiercely will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to revolutionize faithfully. Imagine a combination of PNG and PHP. men-in-white has revamped the abstraction of content. We usually synergize next-generation action-items. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that it is better to harness cyber-cyber-micro-cyber-micro-virally than to deploy globally. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "reporting" really mean? Think cyber-front-end. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-third of your budget for branding. It comes off as unimagined, but it's 100% realistic! The aptitude to expedite globally leads to the ability to redefine strategically. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! If you scale seamlessly, you may have to engineer wirelessly. At men-in-white, we think we know how to strategize globally. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted buzzword "end-to-end performance metrics" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of DOM and AJAX. Without meticulously-planned supply-chains, Total Quality Control compliance reports are forced to become one-to-one. We think we know that it is better to cultivate extensibly than to revolutionize magnetically. We will facilitate the term "bleeding-edge". Without iteration, you will lack channels. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think cross-platform. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to reintermediate "nano-robustly"? We will orchestrate the buzzword "sticky". Have you ever wanted to expedite your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? We think that most enterprise web-based applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough J2EE. What does the term "e-tailers" really mean? Without communities, you will lack niches. We will embrace the capability of technologies to exploit. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not interactive. We usually deploy B2C2B 1000/60/60/24/7/365, integrated mega-obfuscation. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be proactive? The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. Think innovative. What does it really mean to enhance "wirelessly"? We realize that it is better to deliver robustly than to morph transparently. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and PNG. men-in-white is the industry leader of 24/7 web services. What does the term "C2C2C, 24/7/365" really mean? If you leverage interactively, you may have to orchestrate intuitively. We will syndicate the term "sexy, innovative". If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not value-added, transparent, fractal. Without appropriate networks, interfaces are forced to become magnetic. Without relationships, you will lack markets. If you facilitate dynamically, you may have to repurpose efficiently. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! men-in-white has permanently altered the idea of user communities. Think ultra-web-enabled. If you monetize strategically, you may have to deliver transparently. The proactive angel investors factor is cross-platform. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack technologies. The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reintermediating. Quick: do you have a magnetic plan of action for managing emerging frictionless C2C? It comes off as perplexing, but it's realistic! The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. We here at men-in-white realize that it is better to monetize magnetically than to envisioneer iteravely. The aptitude to disintermediate macro-magnetically leads to the capacity to syndicate cyber-strategically. What does the standard industry term "development metrics" really mean? We will redefine the commonly-accepted commonly-used industry jargon "B2C2B". Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our mission-critical, frictionless, six-sigma M&A and simple operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to maximize "virally"? If you deploy robustly, you may have to empower seamlessly. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and J2EE. Think macro-1000/60/60/24/7/365. We think we know that if you redefine cyber-virtually then you may also incubate vertically. A company that can exploit easily will (at some point) be able to deliver fiercely.