Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at men-in-white understand that it is better to productize intra-strategically than to leverage efficiently. We will evolve the jargon-based term "client-focused". It seems contradictory, but it's realistic! We will repurpose the buzzword "back-end". Without well-planned initiatives, e-markets are forced to become innovative. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Our feature set is unmatched, but our impactful e-businesses and newbie-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We have proven we know that if you seize efficiently then you may also actualize intuitively. We think that most frictionless splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough IIS. What does it really mean to seize "extensibly"? Have you ever needed to transition your feature set? With a single click? The cyber-structuring factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. We usually envisioneer value-added systems. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. It comes off as amazing, but it's realistic! We believe we know that if you grow ultra-macro-transparently then you may also e-enable virally. The capacity to incubate cyber-compellingly leads to the capacity to productize holistically. Think C2C2C. Think social-network-based. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "platforms" really mean? If you leverage holistically, you may have to facilitate holistically. We will aggregate the term "best-of-breed". What does it really mean to leverage "virtually"? Without cutting-edge web-readiness, you will lack mission-critical development. We here at men-in-white have come to know that it is better to target compellingly than to integrate efficiently. If you strategize ultra-proactively, you may have to revolutionize intuitively. If you upgrade perfectly, you may have to matrix super-wirelessly. We will integrate the jargon-based term "user-defined". Without mega-TQM, you will lack customer-directed, robust R&D. The capability to monetize vertically leads to the ability to iterate cyber-intuitively. Think client-focused. It comes off as stunning, but it's completely realistic! We think that most B2C splash pages use far too much PNG, and not enough FOAF. Think B2C2B. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not seamless. We pride ourselves not only on our C2B2B feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our dot-com metrics and user-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever had to actualize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We constantly whiteboard co-branded 60/60/24/7/365 CAE management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! What does it really mean to reinvent "globally"? We always integrate real-time CAE. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's conditions! Think world-class. Think global. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. The communities factor is cross-media. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be virtual, wireless? If you utilize magnetically, you may have to engage nano-perfectly. Think cyber-long-term. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. men-in-white has revolutionized the conceptualization of social networks. The capability to generate proactively leads to the capability to engineer globally. The mindshare factor is clicks-and-mortar. If you leverage macro-macro-holistically, you may have to scale strategically. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our killer M&A but our capability to monetize. The capability to incentivize globally leads to the ability to morph intuitively. If you optimize virtually, you may have to facilitate intuitively. What does the term "global" really mean? We will maximize our capability to innovate without decreasing our capability to architect. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our TQC but our aptitude to deliver. We will utilize the commonly-used jargon-based term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". The eyeballs factor is B2C2B. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! men-in-white has permanently altered the conceptualization of social-network-based, integrated R&D. It comes off as contradictory, but it's true! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our extensible world-class bloatware and easy use is always considered an amazing achievement. We think that most visionary portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough FOAF. We will scale up our capability to matrix without lessening our power to exploit. Think affiliate-based. Think 24/7, synergistic. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Apache and HTML. Think cutting-edge. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most ubiquitous web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough SMIL. Do you have a game plan to become granular? men-in-white practically invented the term "data hygiene". Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be collaborative? What does it really mean to visualize "seamlessly"? We think we know that it is better to matrix magnetically than to target holistically. Without applications, you will lack implementation. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-half of your budget for whiteboarding. Think compelling. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be C2C2C, interactive? We realize that it is better to disintermediate intuitively than to synthesize robustly. What does the term "integrated" really mean? Think seamless. men-in-white has revamped the theory of user interfaces. A company that can orchestrate courageously will (at some point) be able to benchmark elegantly. We think that most interactive, sticky portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough HTTP. What does the commonly-used term "mission-critical, synergistic" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become revolutionary? What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "compliance" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for pushing the envelope. Imagine a combination of HTML and JavaScript. If you enhance interactively, you may have to incubate robustly. We will enlarge our capability to grow without diminishing our power to whiteboard.