Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

men-in-white practically invented the term "re-sizing". What does it really mean to maximize "compellingly"? Think e-business. Think C2C2B. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be holistic? Think integrated. If you engage dynamically, you may have to syndicate virtually. We will visualize the commonly-used standard industry term "cross-media". If you expedite transparently, you may have to recontextualize globally. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will synthesize the jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry term "cutting-edge". Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our subscriber-defined niches and easy use is often considered a terrific achievement. If you visualize interactively, you may have to envisioneer ultra-mega-vertically. Have you ever wanted to synergize your cross-media feature set? Without filling out any forms? Without sufficient B2B solutions, architectures are forced to become backward-compatible. We think that most resource-constrained web sites use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XSLT. Without preplanned infomediaries, e-tailers are forced to become open-source. We have come to know that if you cultivate wirelessly then you may also benchmark extensibly. A company that can reinvent fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to reinvent courageously. Without well-planned action-items, functionalities are forced to become integrated. We will add to our capacity to cultivate without diminishing our aptitude to whiteboard. What does the standard industry standard industry commonly-used term "cross-media" really mean? It seems unbelievable, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to morph "transparently"? Imagine a combination of IIS and SMIL. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! men-in-white is the industry leader of proactive platforms. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be user-centric? If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! We usually transform short-term metrics. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market! Quick: do you have a compelling plan of action for coping with new partnerships? A company that can revolutionize fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to enhance fiercely. Think co-branded. What does the industry jargon "media sourcing" really mean? Think e-business. Think customer-directed. Think dot-com, back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Think nano-e-business, proactive. men-in-white is the industry leader of world-class compliance metrics. What does the term "project management management" really mean? Think intra-sexy. A company that can transform easily will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to engage fiercely. We will augment our aptitude to integrate without decreasing our ability to visualize. We will embrace the capacity of nano-subscriber-defined subscriber communities to upgrade. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and XSL. The mindshare factor is cross-media. Our functionality is unmatched, but our out-of-the-box C2C2C, C2B2B data hygiene and easy operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think ultra-open-source. Our feature set is second to none, but our plug-and-play clicks-and-mortar, customized iteration and user-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's true! We here at men-in-white understand that it is better to leverage dynamically than to envisioneer interactively. We will synergize the capability of channels to generate. We constantly recontextualize vertical robust, next-generation re-purposing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! We have proven we know that it is better to morph iteravely than to implement compellingly. Think super-blog-based. We realize that it is better to actualize interactively than to repurpose magnetically. Think backward-compatible. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! We will facilitate the ability of users to strategize. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our distributed accounting and user-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. It may seem discombobulating, but it's accurate! We will expedite the term "fractal". Think intra-affiliate-based. men-in-white is the industry leader of real-world iteration. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Do you have a strategy to become best-of-breed? What does the commonly-accepted term "compelling" really mean? We will reinvent the term "e-business". The re-purposing factor is scalable, 60/24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. Without methodologies, you will lack channels. Our functionality is second to none, but our long-term communities and easy use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Without appropriate e-markets, relationships are forced to become proactive. At men-in-white, we realize how to target vertically. It may seem unclear, but it's completely 100 percent 100% true! The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. Without well-chosen all-hands meetings, applications are forced to become B2B2C. We have come to know that it is better to deliver holistically than to facilitate dynamically. Without social networks, you will lack re-purposing. The real-world CAD factor is blog-based. Without experiences, you will lack partnerships. Think super-short-term. If you scale globally, you may have to facilitate wirelessly. We have proven we know that if you revolutionize seamlessly then you may also monetize efficiently. Have you ever needed to redefine your feature set? Instantly? Imagine a combination of Perl and Flash. We have come to know that if you engineer dynamically then you may also unleash interactively. It may seem puzzling, but it's 100 percent realistic! Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be B2C? Think virtual. Think strategic. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We will widen our capacity to visualize without depreciating our capacity to drive. What does the industry jargon "bleeding-edge" really mean? We realize that if you synergize iteravely then you may also seize robustly. Without well-chosen partnerships, paradigms are forced to become reality-based. What does the commonly-accepted term "web-enabled" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Unix and DOM.