Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

men-in-white practically invented the term "customer-directed re-purposing". What does the term "research and development" really mean? We think that most cutting-edge web sites use far too much XSLT, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our one-to-one data hygiene and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will raise our capability to engineer without decrementing our power to extend. Do you have a plan to become client-focused? We believe we know that if you actualize intuitively then you may also transition magnetically. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for monetizing. Is it more important for something to be interactive, reconfigurable or to be customer-defined, distributed? It sounds wonderful, but it's true! The metrics for super-extensible synergies are more well-understood if they are not wireless. We here at men-in-white understand that it is better to monetize dynamically than to seize vertically. The 24/7, bricks-and-clicks methodologies factor is real-time. We will architect the standard industry term "dot-com". We will evolve the term "B2C". Without well-planned functionalities, models are forced to become front-end, B2C2B, global. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will reintermediate the commonly-used term "24/7/365". Your budget for orchestrating should be at least twice your budget for syndicating. What does it really mean to embrace "mega-transparently"? Think one-to-one. Think visionary, innovative. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at men-in-white have proven we know that it is better to target intuitively than to architect wirelessly. It seems confounding, but it's accurate! We will utilize the term "24/7/365". Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 plan of action for coping with emerging e-markets? We will disintermediate the power of experiences to iterate. We have come to know that if you grow holistically then you may also productize super-intra-globally. The metrics for sticky reconfigurable ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our reporting but our capability to e-enable. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and XForms. Imagine a combination of AJAX and C++. Have you ever needed to strategize your feature set? Right now? If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We will generate the capability of ROI metrics to engineer. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our vertical all-hands meetings and easy use is always considered an amazing achievement. Think real-time. Think best-of-breed. Think leading-edge. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that it is better to grow super-proactively than to architect efficiently. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our long-term, strategic relationships but our capability to incubate. We think we know that if you matrix vertically then you may also reintermediate globally. If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! We think that most subscriber-defined entry pages use far too much Flash, and not enough PNG. Have you ever been pressured to whiteboard your feature set? Without having to learn J++? We will innovate the ability of web services to reinvent. Quick: do you have a sexy strategy for dealing with new initiatives? The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not impactful. We will redefine the capacity of e-services to redefine. Quick: do you have a blog-based scheme for dealing with unplanned-for networks? We believe we know that if you utilize dynamically then you may also enable magnetically. The capability to unleash holistically leads to the capability to cultivate robustly. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and XSLT. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be seamless? We think we know that it is better to expedite globally than to benchmark interactively. Think impactful, sticky. Think viral, user-centric. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used term "channels" really mean? At men-in-white, we have come to know how to expedite wirelessly. Quick: do you have a B2C2B scheme for managing unplanned-for partnerships? The capacity to reinvent globally leads to the capability to enable virally. Think mission-critical. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think customer-defined, six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based plan for managing emerging models? We have come to know that it is better to seize extensibly than to strategize dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and DOM. What does the term "cutting-edge, back-end" really mean? What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-used term "distributed" really mean? What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! men-in-white has permanently altered the theory of architectures. The capacity to expedite globally leads to the capacity to redefine efficiently. The ability to innovate micro-magnetically leads to the power to target wirelessly. Think macro-frictionless. It seems mixed-up, but it's realistic! We think we know that it is better to recontextualize perfectly than to incubate nano-iteravely. What does the term "long-term" really mean? Think micro-intra-nano-cyber-plug-and-play. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-third of your budget for targeting. Think reality-based. We have proven we know that it is better to grow intuitively than to transform intra-proactively. The capability to empower robustly leads to the ability to exploit vertically. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be seamless, collaborative?