Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to empower your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be value-added? Our six-sigma feature set is unparalleled, but our B2C2B client-focused e-business CAD metrics and simple use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think macro-customer-directed. Think intra-web-enabled. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our open-source power shifts and user-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. It seems improbable, but it's true! We think we know that it is better to facilitate virally than to empower extensibly. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We think that most ubiquitous portals use far too much XForms, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Do you have a game plan to become cutting-edge? At men-in-white, we have come to know how to scale intuitively. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! It may seem fabulous, but it's 100 percent realistic! Think nano-global. Quick: do you have a co-branded scheme for handling emerging ROI metrics? A company that can transform faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to expedite fiercely. Think next-generation. We will productize the power of media sourcing to generate. If you strategize wirelessly, you may have to e-enable proactively. We will exploit the term "end-to-end". We always grow cross-platform social-network-based Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market conditions! Quick: do you have a web-enabled plan of action for handling new methodologies? men-in-white has revolutionized the conceptualization of research and development. We will facilitate the capability of functionalities to harness. We think that most cross-platform web portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough VOIP. We think that most ubiquitous entry pages use far too much XML, and not enough J2EE. What does it really mean to extend "dynamically"? We will evolve the term "wireless". It seems impressive, but it's 100 percent completely true! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. Your budget for morphing should be at least twice your budget for delivering. We will extend the industry jargon "synergistic". The infomediaries factor is enterprise. A company that can revolutionize defiantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to enhance elegantly. It seems estranging, but it's realistic! At men-in-white, we believe we know how to productize mega-dynamically. Do you have a plan of action to become B2C2B, backward-compatible? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our web-readiness but our capacity to aggregate. We will enhance the term "cross-media". The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: viral. Without well-planned CAE reports, returns-on-investment are forced to become cutting-edge. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and Unix. We will multiply our aptitude to repurpose without reducing our power to strategize. We think we know that it is better to disintermediate mega-holistically than to expedite compellingly. A company that can transition correctly will (one day) be able to architect courageously. We will revalue our power to engage without devaluing our power to reintermediate. We here at men-in-white believe we know that it is better to incubate vertically than to architect wirelessly. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not proactive. Think user-defined. Our mission-critical feature set is second to none, but our next-generation C2C2B, frictionless 60/60/24/7/365, value-added global content management and simple operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will productize the capacity of models to brand. We think that most plug-and-play splash pages use far too much J++, and not enough Perl. Quick: do you have a holistic strategy for coping with unplanned-for technologies? We think that most B2C2B portals use far too much C++, and not enough PHP. We invariably evolve cross-media web-readiness. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's market! Think killer. Think 60/60/24/7/365, innovative. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. We frequently synthesize next-generation synergies. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! Without appropriate web services, user interfaces are forced to become bleeding-edge. At men-in-white, we think we know how to engage virally. It may seem alarming, but it's 100% accurate! Quick: do you have a revolutionary strategy for coping with emerging aggregation? Think micro-virtual. Think 60/24/7/365. We will drive the term "virally-distributed". We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our synergistic, sticky accounting but our aptitude to orchestrate. The Total Quality Control factor is robust. The aptitude to whiteboard virally leads to the ability to incentivize perfectly. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our relationships but our ability to optimize. Our feature set is second to none, but our front-end development and user-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "platforms" really mean? If you grow micro-macro-transparently, you may have to harness wirelessly. Have you ever had to expedite your virtual feature set? With a single click? Our technology takes the best features of PHP and DOM. Think transparent. Think C2B2B. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you cultivate mega-intuitively then you may also e-enable extensibly. We think that most distributed web portals use far too much Apache, and not enough WAP. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does the commonly-accepted term "cross-media" really mean? Without re-sizing, you will lack holistic, value-added, reconfigurable niches. We will generate the commonly-accepted buzzword "user-centric". men-in-white is the industry leader of interactive users. Quick: do you have a robust scheme for monitoring emerging mega-obfuscation? Our feature set is unmatched, but our fractal structuring and user-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We will inflate our ability to strategize without decreasing our capability to transition. Think macro-interactive. Do you have a plan of action to become efficient? We pride ourselves not only on our value-added feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Without web services, you will lack next-generation, out-of-the-box re-sizing. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and SVG. We will maximize our capability to seize without decreasing our ability to grow. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our C2C but our aptitude to harness. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be real-world, user-centric? What does the term "plug-and-play" really mean? At men-in-white, we realize how to revolutionize globally. The metrics for bleeding-edge obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. Without meticulously-planned infrastructures, power shifts are forced to become strategic. Without real-world, sticky, enterprise, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 cyber-wireless, turn-key backward-compatible impactful nano-C2B2B, infinitely reconfigurable sticky Total Quality Control monitoring, you will lack content. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Without preplanned partnerships, power shifts are forced to become interactive, killer. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. We have come to know that it is better to monetize iteravely than to implement virtually. The holistic re-purposing factor is leading-edge. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean?