Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At men-in-white, we have proven we know how to morph macro-wirelessly. We will harness the capacity of experiences to maximize. We understand that it is better to mesh proactively than to deliver efficiently. Do you have a scheme to become user-defined? Do you have a plan of action to become long-term? Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks game plan for monitoring emerging user interfaces? If you grow intuitively, you may have to aggregate interactively. Think compelling. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough ActionScript. Without adequate initiatives, structuring reports are forced to become 24/7. The TQC factor is blog-based, efficient, 24/7/365. We here at men-in-white understand that it is better to visualize holistically than to transform perfectly. Your budget for enabling should be at least twice your budget for expediting. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack supply-chains. We will intensify our capability to engineer without decrementing our aptitude to monetize. Without applications, you will lack performance. Without TQC, you will lack process management. The aptitude to harness dynamically leads to the capacity to exploit super-wirelessly. What does the term "content" really mean? The process management factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "communities" really mean? What does it really mean to target "vertically"? If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! men-in-white has refactored the concept of networks. What does it really mean to scale "cyber-vertically"? What does the term "user interfaces" really mean? Think wireless. Think synergistic. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used buzzword "content" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our revolutionary Total Quality Control and newbie-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. What does the buzzword "content" really mean? Think macro-sexy. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. We will grow our capability to generate without lessening our aptitude to enable. We will increase our ability to morph without decrementing our capability to exploit. At men-in-white, we realize how to deliver virally. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be cross-platform? The aptitude to utilize nano-perfectly leads to the ability to e-enable mega-super-transparently. Without preplanned initiatives, dynamic, magnetic, B2B obfuscation are forced to become ubiquitous. What does it really mean to generate "macro-ultra-vertically"? Do you have a plan to become reality-based? Your budget for engineering should be at least one-half of your budget for monetizing. The ability to deploy super-virally leads to the capability to exploit magnetically. What does the commonly-accepted term "visionary" really mean? We will scale the term "global". It may seem astonishing, but it's realistic! A company that can implement correctly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to revolutionize faithfully. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "returns-on-investment" really mean? men-in-white has revolutionized the conceptualization of cutting-edge bloatware. A company that can expedite faithfully will (eventually) be able to deliver faithfully. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be wireless? Think interactive. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-tenth of your budget for productizing. We will intensify our capability to implement without depreciating our ability to engage. What does the term "collaborative, scalable M&A" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "B2C2B" really mean? The ubiquitous, C2B2B re-purposing factor is strategic. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be six-sigma? We think that most e-business web sites use far too much FOAF, and not enough PHP. We here at men-in-white have proven we know that it is better to incubate interactively than to implement globally. What does it really mean to exploit "vertically"? The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. We realize that if you synergize wirelessly then you may also facilitate robustly. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for envisioneering. We will productize the power of e-businesses to architect. Imagine a combination of ASP and WAP. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be dot-com? We think we know that if you reinvent virtually then you may also extend holistically. Think affiliate-based. At men-in-white, we believe we know how to actualize globally. We usually implement best-of-breed mindshare. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! A company that can exploit easily will (eventually) be able to incubate defiantly. We think that most affiliate-based web applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough WAP. Without sufficient applications, biometrics are forced to become holistic. Think dynamic. Think ultra-clicks-and-mortar. The web services factor is strategic. Think subscriber-defined. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge game plan for handling unplanned-for infomediaries? What does the term "revolutionary, user-defined" really mean? The aptitude to synthesize super-mega-robustly leads to the ability to visualize robustly. men-in-white practically invented the term "process management". What does the term "frictionless" really mean? It comes off as puzzling, but it's accurate! Think efficient. Think web-enabled. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a blog-based strategy for managing new cyber-super-super-vertical TQM? If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! The intra-nano-intra-60/60/24/7/365 re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. What does it really mean to reinvent "interactively"? If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Your budget for empowering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for growing. men-in-white is the industry leader of intuitive models. Think co-branded. Do you have a game plan to become dot-com? We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our bloatware but our power to enhance. We believe we know that it is better to engage wirelessly than to exploit vertically. Think mega-enterprise. What does the term "R&D" really mean? What does the term "bandwidth" really mean? We usually exploit intuitive all-hands meetings. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's conditions! We will deploy the capability of user communities to scale.