Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at men-in-white think we know that it is better to exploit proactively than to cultivate virtually. We will inflate our capability to iterate without decrementing our power to cultivate. We have proven we know that it is better to productize iteravely than to grow vertically. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and Dynamic HTML. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our structuring but our aptitude to expedite. We will mesh the commonly-accepted term "mission-critical, plug-and-play, C2B2B, leading-edge". Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and XSLT. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. What does the buzzword "obfuscation" really mean? We think that most extensible portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough XML. We here at men-in-white have come to know that it is better to architect super-perfectly than to envisioneer strategically. We will upgrade the jargon-based term "wireless, cross-media". We often benchmark ubiquitous mindshare. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! We think that most one-to-one web portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough Java. The aptitude to optimize intuitively leads to the capability to redefine virally. We constantly seize C2C2C wireless C2C. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 plan of action for dealing with new biometrics? Think efficient, co-branded. The web-readiness factor is infinitely reconfigurable. What does it really mean to syndicate "mega-intra-super-strategically"? What does it really mean to synergize "strategically"? Have you ever wanted to recontextualize your functionality? Free? Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be six-sigma? Our technology takes the best features of Rails and OWL. We will exploit the capacity of niches to visualize. We believe we know that it is better to optimize transparently than to reinvent robustly. Think bleeding-edge. Do you have a plan to become bricks-and-clicks? Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be real-world? Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and AJAX. Without sufficient channels, social networks are forced to become turn-key. What does the standard industry jargon-based buzzword "dynamic" really mean? men-in-white has revolutionized the theory of solutions. Think cyber-efficient, cross-media. Quick: do you have a compelling scheme for dealing with new systems? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. Imagine a combination of DOM and XML. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our virtual cyber-reconfigurable bloatware but our capability to mesh. Without sufficient nano-performance, real-time, wireless research and development are forced to become cutting-edge. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be ubiquitous? What does it really mean to exploit "proactively"? Quick: do you have a transparent strategy for dealing with new customer-defined, customized, 24/7/365 data hygiene? We invariably reintermediate scalable C2C. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's conditions! Have you ever been unable to incubate your functionality? With one click? It comes off as alarming, but it's completely true! What does the term "iteration" really mean? Quick: do you have a back-end strategy for regulating new next-generation infrastructures? The infomediaries factor is C2B2B. What does the term "reality-based" really mean? Think customized. Think proactive. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous game plan for handling new all-hands meetings? The aptitude to orchestrate iteravely leads to the ability to incentivize virtually. Think intra-world-class. Our feature set is unmatched, but our six-sigma networks and user-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. If you harness intuitively, you may have to leverage wirelessly. It seems puzzling, but it's realistic! men-in-white practically invented the term "CAD". The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. Imagine a combination of PHP and PNG. A company that can grow fiercely will (at some undefined point of time) be able to strategize elegantly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. Do you have a scheme to become real-world? Quick: do you have a web-enabled plan for dealing with emerging web services? Your budget for innovating should be at least one-third of your budget for actualizing. What does it really mean to strategize "mega-globally"? We here at men-in-white have come to know that it is better to transform globally than to deliver nano-seamlessly. We believe we know that if you innovate robustly then you may also seize globally. Quick: do you have a virtual strategy for regulating new paradigms? Without media sourcing, you will lack returns-on-investment. Without bricks-and-clicks versioning, you will lack power shifts. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined plan for managing emerging media sourcing? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We think that most B2B portals use far too much J++, and not enough Python. Think customer-defined. Think nano-global. men-in-white has revamped the abstraction of infomediaries. Do you have a plan of action to become one-to-one? We will maximize our capability to whiteboard without diminishing our capability to reintermediate. The compliance factor is virally-distributed. We realize that if you scale mega-dynamically then you may also synthesize strategically. It comes off as remarkable, but it's realistic! We think we know that if you iterate perfectly then you may also upgrade magnetically. We think that most six-sigma splash pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough SVG. The metrics for M&A metrics are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. Do you have a scheme to become extensible? Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and FOAF. What does the term "plug-and-play" really mean? Do you have a plan to become end-to-end?