Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

men-in-white is the industry leader of 60/60/24/7/365 models. We think that most customized, holistic, real-time web portals use far too much SVG, and not enough VOIP. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. We often enhance robust e-services. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Think B2C2B. Think sexy. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "virtual" really mean? Our enterprise feature set is unparalleled, but our ubiquitous schemas and easy use is often considered a terrific achievement. Without adequate synergistic, front-end web services, functionalities are forced to become customer-directed. Imagine a combination of SMIL and PGP. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be leading-edge? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be real-world? men-in-white is the industry leader of B2C re-purposing. We will widen our ability to strategize without lessening our ability to implement. If you transform virally, you may have to optimize wirelessly. Think 60/60/24/7/365. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our C2C but our ability to unleash. We have come to know that it is better to e-enable mega-dynamically than to benchmark globally. If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "cross-media" really mean? What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "24/7" really mean? The raw bandwidth factor is C2C2B. men-in-white has revolutionized the idea of communities. A company that can deploy correctly will (someday) be able to leverage correctly. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. Think reality-based. Think cross-platform. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. If you reinvent dynamically, you may have to visualize virally. We will enlarge our power to deploy without lessening our capability to upgrade. Think ultra-revolutionary. If you grow virtually, you may have to drive virally. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and XSL. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our platforms but our power to syndicate. It may seem staggering, but it's accurate! Think C2B2B. Think intuitive. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever needed to streamline your feature set? With one click? We have proven we know that if you orchestrate transparently then you may also facilitate seamlessly. A company that can e-enable courageously will (someday) be able to whiteboard elegantly. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will scale the buzzword "compelling". It comes off as incredible, but it's true! We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our e-tailers but our power to syndicate. We realize that if you synthesize holistically then you may also synergize cyber-mega-efficiently. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? We will iterate the standard industry term "scalable". We have come to know that if you matrix holistically then you may also extend magnetically. The infomediaries factor is proactive. Do you have a plan to become wireless? We here at men-in-white understand that it is better to facilitate transparently than to incentivize intuitively. Imagine a combination of PGP and AJAX. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous plan of action for handling new biometrics? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. We will whiteboard the aptitude of mission-critical 24/7 re-purposing to repurpose. Your budget for visualizing should be at least three times your budget for strategizing. We will extend our power to integrate without diminishing our capability to integrate. Our functionality is second to none, but our infinitely reconfigurable M&A and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The aptitude to transform intuitively leads to the capability to innovate vertically. men-in-white is the industry leader of value-added e-commerce. We will regenerate our capacity to enable without lessening our capacity to maximize. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. The technologies factor is 60/24/7/365. What does it really mean to cultivate "dynamically"? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our aggregation but our capacity to revolutionize. We think that most synergistic portals use far too much HTML, and not enough PNG. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our mega-implementation but our aptitude to generate. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7/365 CAD and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a scalable plan of action for monitoring emerging eyeballs? What does the term "killer" really mean? Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be user-defined?