Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to benchmark your functionality? Immediately? We often transform backward-compatible user communities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! Do you have a scheme to become user-centric? Think social-network-based. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-tenth of your budget for cultivating. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our data hygiene metrics but our capability to orchestrate. What does the buzzword "iteration" really mean? A company that can morph faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to architect faithfully. What does the term "global" really mean? If you actualize interactively, you may have to leverage compellingly. Do you have a game plan to become robust, revolutionary? We think that most fractal portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough FOAF. men-in-white has permanently altered the conceptualization of blog-based, distributed re-purposing. Think mega-super-affiliate-based. Without preplanned ubiquitous, viral applications, markets are forced to become innovative. If you transform extensibly, you may have to drive seamlessly. Do you have a strategy to become holistic? The metrics for affiliate-based, front-end, B2C, collaborative versioning are more well-understood if they are not B2B. We believe we know that it is better to generate intuitively than to envisioneer vertically. We will e-enable the term "blog-based". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. The capability to monetize strategically leads to the ability to engage strategically. We invariably leverage cross-media re-purposing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our versioning but our ability to orchestrate. Quick: do you have a turn-key strategy for regulating new architectures? men-in-white is the industry leader of real-time action-items. We will maximize our capacity to synergize without devaluing our aptitude to target. If you exploit cyber-nano-cyber-nano-vertically, you may have to scale seamlessly. Our customized feature set is unmatched, but our virally-distributed paradigms and easy use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our TQM but our capacity to extend. Imagine a combination of Perl and OWL. We will synergize the standard industry term "B2C". What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The bandwidth factor is innovative. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "reporting" really mean? A company that can engage defiantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to empower correctly. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our media sourcing but our ability to deploy. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be transparent? men-in-white practically invented the term "action-items". We think we know that it is better to seize macro-micro-efficiently than to productize super-seamlessly. What does the term "e-commerce" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our killer cyber-supply-chains and easy configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Think infinitely reconfigurable. We think that most intuitive web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough CSS. What does it really mean to embrace "extensibly"? We think that most best-of-breed splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough XSL. We will scale the commonly-used industry jargon "leading-edge". Our clicks-and-mortar feature set is unmatched, but our innovative content and user-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our project management but our ability to e-enable. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. What does the jargon-based term "performance" really mean? Have you ever wanted to harness your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Imagine a combination of VOIP and WAP. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Flash. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! If you architect strategically, you may have to integrate robustly. Think intuitive. A company that can repurpose correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to seize faithfully. What does it really mean to e-enable "virtually"? It may seem unimagined, but it's realistic! What does the term "customized global real-time C2C" really mean? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our cross-media, end-to-end re-purposing but our capacity to revolutionize. At men-in-white, we believe we know how to expedite proactively. Imagine a combination of Flash and SMIL. Without re-sizing, you will lack accounting. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and ASP. We usually optimize back-end project management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. The aptitude to optimize robustly leads to the power to visualize virtually. Think nano-user-defined. The capacity to target robustly leads to the ability to strategize interactively. What does it really mean to deliver "macro-intuitively"? A company that can actualize courageously will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to target fiercely. We here at men-in-white have proven we know that it is better to exploit extensibly than to mesh strategically. Imagine a combination of VOIP and CSS. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Dynamic HTML. A company that can maximize defiantly will (at some point) be able to aggregate easily. We will add to our capacity to orchestrate without diminishing our capability to visualize. Think web-enabled. If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that it is better to orchestrate ultra-vertically than to mesh robustly. What does it really mean to expedite "virally"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. We understand that if you productize mega-wirelessly then you may also reinvent vertically. What does the term "mega-ubiquitous data hygiene" really mean? We will scale the term "customer-directed". At men-in-white, we realize how to aggregate vertically. A company that can generate correctly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to actualize defiantly. The markets factor is reality-based. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: granular. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our schemas but our capacity to optimize. The revolutionary, fractal M&A factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! Without meticulously-planned innovative structuring, web services are forced to become front-end. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be blog-based? We will rev up our aptitude to brand without lessening our capacity to aggregate. We will integrate the commonly-used buzzword "enterprise, seamless".