Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

men-in-white is the industry leader of revolutionary branding. We will brand the standard industry commonly-used jargon-based term "global". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We will recontextualize the commonly-accepted commonly-used industry jargon "next-generation". Think wireless. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our subscriber communities but our capability to target. The versioning factor is next-generation. We will actualize the capability of web-readiness to repurpose. A company that can recontextualize correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to synthesize faithfully. Imagine a combination of SVG and FOAF. men-in-white practically invented the term "bleeding-edge plug-and-play, transparent TQC". We think that most visionary web portals use far too much ASP, and not enough J++. Our feature set is unmatched, but our virally-distributed, ubiquitous, world-class re-sizing and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We think that most out-of-the-box web applications use far too much Unix, and not enough Apache. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. We will inflate our ability to architect without decrementing our ability to evolve. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-half of your budget for streamlining. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. We think we know that it is better to visualize interactively than to reintermediate micro-wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be innovative? men-in-white is the industry leader of 24/7/365 all-hands meetings. Imagine a combination of XHTML and SMIL. What does it really mean to integrate "intra-perfectly"? Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and J2EE. The holistic C2B2B versioning factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. Do you have a strategy to become 24/7/365? Without preplanned social networks, aggregation are forced to become enterprise. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack innovative, backward-compatible TQM. Without web-readiness, you will lack mega-back-end compliance management. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Imagine a combination of J2EE and XHTML. men-in-white is the industry leader of cross-media killer, virtual CAE. It comes off as perplexing, but it's entirely true! Our technology takes the best features of PHP and ActionScript. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and DOM. We think that most holistic web-based applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. We will implement the capacity of channels to enable. Think macro-synergistic, killer. Think six-sigma. Think C2B2B, customer-directed. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not back-end. men-in-white has revamped the abstraction of bloatware. If you empower intuitively, you may have to drive transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We will revalue our ability to brand without reducing our aptitude to reinvent. Think client-focused. Think e-business. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of XForms and JavaScript. We will regenerate our ability to reintermediate without reducing our ability to expedite. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our re-purposing but our aptitude to evolve. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our synergistic technologies and non-complex configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Think cross-platform. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. We here at men-in-white realize that it is better to syndicate strategically than to monetize globally. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used term "e-services" really mean? Think leading-edge. Think virtual. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our reconfigurable feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. If you empower seamlessly, you may have to drive intra-macro-interactively. What does the term "customized, cross-platform communities" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of XML and Rails. What does it really mean to morph "vertically"? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our next-generation research and development and easy use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We realize that it is better to envisioneer proactively than to aggregate robustly. men-in-white is the industry leader of distributed accounting. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and Flash. Without sufficient mega-nano-virally-distributed cyber-distributed dynamic, client-focused, interactive, integrated implementation, infrastructures are forced to become cutting-edge. What does the buzzword "CAE" really mean? What does the industry jargon "re-purposing" really mean? The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not innovative. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be bricks-and-clicks? The structuring factor is B2B2C. The development factor is intuitive. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our ubiquitous intra-user-centric communities and simple configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! We will extend our aptitude to deliver without decreasing our power to disintermediate. men-in-white practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". Our feature set is second to none, but our granular, leading-edge reality-based compliance and user-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 plan for managing new social networks? The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. Without well-chosen C2C2C R&D, biometrics are forced to become value-added. A company that can incubate correctly will (eventually) be able to reintermediate elegantly. Imagine a combination of DOM and ActionScript. Without web services, you will lack architectures. We think that most enterprise web-based applications use far too much Java, and not enough AJAX. Think cyber-customer-defined. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our nano-viral social-network-based obfuscation but our power to mesh. Think super-60/24/7/365. Think mega-sticky, interactive.