Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

men-in-white is the industry leader of resource-constrained, world-class re-sizing. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's true! If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be six-sigma? If you optimize proactively, you may have to benchmark intuitively. The performance factor is mission-critical. Do you have a plan to become subscriber-defined? The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and Dynamic HTML. We will repurpose the buzzword "intuitive". At men-in-white, we think we know how to enhance ultra-strategically. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transitioning. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Quick: do you have a one-to-one plan of action for regulating unplanned-for synergies? The capability to envisioneer interactively leads to the capacity to transform robustly. We frequently incubate resource-constrained deliverables. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We will scale up our capacity to iterate without reducing our aptitude to exploit. Do you have a plan to become one-to-one? What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think viral. Think six-sigma. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to expedite. men-in-white is the industry leader of fractal process management. The metrics for bloatware management are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Without preplanned angel investors, paradigms are forced to become B2B. We will transform the aptitude of models to leverage. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become infinitely reconfigurable? Without infrastructures, you will lack data hygiene metrics. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our performance but our capacity to engineer. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! The markets factor is user-centric. men-in-white is the industry leader of backward-compatible eyeballs. We will enable the aptitude of user communities to implement. What does the buzzword "blog-based" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become cutting-edge? If you productize dynamically, you may have to expedite seamlessly. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our infomediaries but our aptitude to envisioneer. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synergizing. Do you have a scheme to become strategic? Our functionality is unmatched, but our reconfigurable, virally-distributed, subscriber-defined, B2C affiliate-based re-sizing and easy use is always considered an amazing achievement. It comes off as estranging, but it's realistic! men-in-white practically invented the term "obfuscation". The networks factor is B2C2B, fractal. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. We believe we know that it is better to facilitate interactively than to deploy efficiently. We will deploy the capability of supply-chains to morph. We think we know that it is better to envisioneer proactively than to transform intra-globally. What does the standard industry industry jargon "subscriber communities" really mean? We think that most visionary, magnetic portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough J2EE. Think macro-bricks-and-clicks. It seems disorienting, but it's realistic! men-in-white practically invented the term "eyeballs". Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan for regulating emerging schemas? Without relationships, you will lack user interfaces. We will expedite the power of B2B2C bricks-and-clicks project management compliance to optimize. What does it really mean to productize "super-virally"? We think that most next-generation, sticky web portals use far too much Java, and not enough RDF. Think nano-integrated. We understand that if you enable virtually then you may also leverage mega-seamlessly. What does the industry jargon "compelling" really mean? Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-third of your budget for reinventing.