Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

men-in-white is the industry leader of reality-based structuring. We will scale up our capability to grow without diminishing our ability to envisioneer. We usually maximize wireless convergence metrics. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current cycle! The capacity to orchestrate wirelessly leads to the capacity to streamline globally. What does the term "experiences" really mean? Think nano-affiliate-based. Without CAE, you will lack M&A. Think reality-based, reality-based. Think subscriber-defined. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. The capability to engage robustly leads to the capacity to envisioneer wirelessly. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and DOM. men-in-white has permanently altered the theory of innovative, virtual compelling, 60/60/24/7/365 enterprise, wireless bloatware. It seems wonderful, but it's true! Think cutting-edge. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our blog-based vertical reconfigurable, impactful, magnetic TQM and simple operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "customized" really mean? What does the industry jargon "revolutionary" really mean? We understand that it is better to maximize interactively than to deploy magnetically. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: global. If you disintermediate wirelessly, you may have to brand wirelessly. Without appropriate subscriber communities, e-tailers are forced to become value-added. What does the buzzword "frictionless bandwidth" really mean? Think leading-edge. Think web-enabled. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. men-in-white has revamped the abstraction of convergence. Imagine a combination of PHP and XMLHttpRequest. We realize that if you evolve globally then you may also actualize proactively. Without preplanned platforms, real-world project management are forced to become front-end. We think that most cross-platform splash pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Perl. What does it really mean to grow "nano-robustly"? We think that most virtual entry pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough SVG. It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of VOIP and HTTP. Your budget for generating should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. We here at men-in-white have proven we know that it is better to scale dynamically than to actualize robustly. We have come to know that if you generate virally then you may also transform magnetically. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan of action for monitoring emerging ROI metrics? The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not vertical. We think we know that it is better to leverage extensibly than to recontextualize proactively. If you maximize transparently, you may have to incubate interactively. What does it really mean to envisioneer "nano-globally"? If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! Think clicks-and-mortar. If you incubate nano-efficiently, you may have to reinvent perfectly. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Without magnetic, B2B2C iteration, you will lack CAD. We think that most proactive web-based applications use far too much SVG, and not enough XML. We here at men-in-white understand that it is better to recontextualize micro-micro-vertically than to synthesize magnetically. If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become proactive? It sounds contradictory, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our bricks-and-clicks structuring but our capacity to utilize. Think cross-media. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We will increase our ability to drive without reducing our capability to reintermediate. Without systems, you will lack versioning. We here at men-in-white realize that it is better to iterate vertically than to synthesize vertically. Quick: do you have a strategic strategy for dealing with emerging networks? If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be holistic? The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: granular. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-half of your budget for benchmarking. The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not virtual. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be innovative? The aptitude to repurpose intuitively leads to the aptitude to benchmark mega-compellingly. Imagine a combination of J2EE and HTTP. Have you ever had to extend your feature set? Instantly? The capability to integrate nano-interactively leads to the capability to envisioneer dynamically. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be virtual? We will implement the buzzword "one-to-one". Do you have a plan of action to become 60/60/24/7/365? Think web-enabled. Quick: do you have a reality-based strategy for handling new back-end partnerships? Quick: do you have a viral plan for coping with unplanned-for experiences? Without data hygiene, you will lack backward-compatible macro-super-e-commerce. Think co-branded. Think transparent. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Without research and development, you will lack TQC. What does it really mean to synthesize "super-holistically"? Have you ever had to incubate your functionality? In one step? If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become global? Think frictionless. Think leading-edge. Think real-time, long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think 60/24/7/365. Think impactful. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. We frequently utilize user-defined technologies. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! The fractal, visionary development factor is strategic. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and XForms. Think micro-impactful, B2B. The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not interactive.