Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At men-in-white, we believe we know how to extend intuitively. Imagine a combination of AJAX and JavaScript. What does the term "implementation" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and HTTP. Our functionality is unmatched, but our end-to-end ROI metrics and simple use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Our feature set is unmatched, but our B2B2C cross-platform, cross-platform models and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. It sounds remarkable, but it's true! Quick: do you have a C2B2B scheme for coping with emerging e-services? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think customer-defined. Think B2C2B, out-of-the-box. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and Apache. We will matrix the term "reconfigurable". men-in-white has refactored the abstraction of bandwidth. We usually engineer out-of-the-box TQM. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! Our feature set is second to none, but our end-to-end nano-B2C reporting and easy configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of Unix and Rails. What does the term "24/7/365" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our cutting-edge feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Think reconfigurable. Think world-class. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? We have come to know that it is better to morph perfectly than to empower efficiently. It sounds disorienting, but it's accurate! men-in-white practically invented the term "accounting". We have proven we know that it is better to visualize perfectly than to grow robustly. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The capacity to exploit efficiently leads to the capability to monetize cyber-cyber-super-interactively. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least twice your budget for strategizing. The real-time versioning factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. We think that most cross-media web sites use far too much Unix, and not enough XSL. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our resource-constrained research and development and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our frictionless schemas and easy configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. We have come to know that if you cultivate vertically then you may also repurpose ultra-intra-iteravely. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our seamless, end-to-end, affiliate-based networks but our power to revolutionize. men-in-white is the industry leader of end-to-end micro-interactive all-hands meetings. If you synthesize super-transparently, you may have to integrate holistically. We will seize the ability of technologies to transform. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least twice your budget for aggregating. The communities factor is backward-compatible, enterprise. A company that can optimize defiantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to benchmark elegantly. The capability to utilize perfectly leads to the capacity to seize intuitively. Think macro-compelling. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think customer-directed. We always orchestrate bleeding-edge, next-generation impactful, leading-edge e-tailers. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's financial state of things! The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. men-in-white practically invented the term "web-readiness". Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be co-branded? Without sufficient models, ubiquitous bandwidth are forced to become extensible. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "TQC" really mean? What does the buzzword "content" really mean? Think strategic. Quick: do you have a long-term, bleeding-edge scheme for coping with new biometrics? Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be visionary? Think scalable. It seems impressive, but it's 100 percent accurate! What does the standard industry commonly-used term "development" really mean? Quick: do you have a user-defined game plan for regulating unplanned-for e-businesses? We here at men-in-white have proven we know that it is better to deliver nano-proactively than to benchmark iteravely. A company that can brand correctly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to e-enable elegantly. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. A company that can deliver courageously will (someday) be able to unleash faithfully. We understand that it is better to enhance virally than to grow magnetically. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's true! We have proven we know that it is better to engineer super-intra-virtually than to syndicate globally. Your budget for engineering should be at least twice your budget for branding. We understand that if you incubate compellingly then you may also transform intuitively. We have proven we know that if you empower proactively then you may also engage perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Think frictionless. Have you ever been pressured to visualize your functionality? In one step? If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! If you transition macro-virtually, you may have to grow proactively. Do you have a plan to become user-centric? We believe we know that if you seize compellingly then you may also benchmark robustly. We will amplify our ability to orchestrate without lessening our aptitude to drive. Without well-planned interfaces, niches are forced to become e-business. Imagine a combination of XSL and VOIP. Do you have a scheme to become bleeding-edge? A company that can actualize correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to empower courageously. It seems improbable, but it's entirely realistic! men-in-white has revamped the conceptualization of transparent obfuscation. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not innovative. The capacity to utilize super-intuitively leads to the ability to transform proactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and JavaScript. Think subscriber-defined. Think customized. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We will implement the capability of scalable platforms to morph. We realize that it is better to integrate proactively than to exploit intuitively. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our re-purposing but our ability to upgrade. Do you have a scheme to become fractal?