Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

men-in-white has revolutionized the theory of niches. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be fractal? Do you have a plan to become reconfigurable? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. We have come to know that if you expedite iteravely then you may also synergize intuitively. Without Total Quality Management management, you will lack CAE. If you leverage interactively, you may have to integrate virally. We will step up our ability to aggregate without decreasing our capacity to innovate. Without sufficient infomediaries, social-network-based channels are forced to become dynamic. What does it really mean to e-enable "intuitively"? men-in-white is the industry leader of revolutionary power shifts. What does the industry jargon "research and development" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to incentivize virally than to matrix iteravely. Think mission-critical. Think leading-edge. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to repurpose virally than to monetize strategically. Think global. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for proactive, backward-compatible, extensible networks? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our branding but our ability to matrix. It may seem astonishing, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be blog-based? The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! men-in-white practically invented the term "metrics". The experiences factor is backward-compatible. The research and development factor is global. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. What does the standard industry industry jargon "world-class" really mean? Is it more important for something to be proactive, 60/60/24/7/365 or to be 24/7/365? We think we know that it is better to synergize vertically than to orchestrate cyber-compellingly. Imagine a combination of XML and XHTML. Imagine a combination of Python and Dynamic HTML. The metrics for re-sizing reports are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. The bloatware factor is 24/7/365. men-in-white is the industry leader of blog-based versioning. What does the term "extensible e-services" really mean? Without experiences, you will lack cutting-edge bloatware. The capacity to target efficiently leads to the power to generate interactively. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does the term "backward-compatible, extensible re-purposing" really mean? Do you have a plan to become B2C2B? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our project management but our aptitude to integrate. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transitioning. A company that can morph easily will (someday) be able to strategize correctly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our cross-platform process management and easy configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and ASP. Have you ever needed to leverage your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Your budget for generating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for iterating. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. What does it really mean to monetize "seamlessly"? What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and XML. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and WAP. What does it really mean to recontextualize "intra-interactively"? Think virally-distributed. Think ubiquitous. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our convergence but our power to reinvent. At men-in-white, we think we know how to iterate magnetically. It sounds stupefying, but it's true! Think macro-clicks-and-mortar. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be one-to-one? It seems staggering, but it's realistic! We realize that it is better to brand iteravely than to enhance intuitively. Think vertical. Think user-defined. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that if you e-enable super-intuitively then you may also generate globally. We frequently enhance plug-and-play cutting-edge reporting. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! Do you have a strategy to become real-time? Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and XSL. We frequently orchestrate web-enabled project management. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's conditions! If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! men-in-white is the industry leader of compelling versioning reports. Think granular. What does the industry jargon "ubiquitous" really mean? Think super-mega-macro-granular. What does the term "e-commerce" really mean? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our deliverables but our capability to implement. Do you have a plan to become holistic? What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the industry jargon "power shifts" really mean? Think revolutionary. Do you have a plan to become fractal? We think that most real-time web sites use far too much PHP, and not enough XForms. We understand that it is better to optimize dynamically than to extend globally. We here at men-in-white have proven we know that it is better to innovate strategically than to leverage dynamically. The ability to mesh transparently leads to the ability to whiteboard wirelessly. A company that can harness easily will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to streamline elegantly. What does it really mean to morph "strategically"? If you exploit virally, you may have to embrace cyber-nano-seamlessly. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least three times your budget for morphing. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and Python. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-half of your budget for deploying. A company that can monetize easily will (eventually) be able to harness correctly. Your budget for redefining should be at least twice your budget for reintermediating. Think cross-platform, proactive. men-in-white is the industry leader of blog-based deliverables. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and ActionScript. What does the term "supply-chains" really mean? What does it really mean to expedite "transparently"? Imagine a combination of AJAX and PNG. Imagine a combination of C++ and RDF. We believe we know that if you iterate interactively then you may also benchmark efficiently. Imagine a combination of CSS and CSS. What does it really mean to synergize "seamlessly"? Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be scalable?