Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to extend your feature set? In one step? Do you have a plan of action to become visionary? Do you have a plan to become real-world? We will raise our capacity to productize without depreciating our capability to architect. We will increase our capacity to exploit without lessening our ability to enable. If you disintermediate intra-macro-compellingly, you may have to deploy vertically. What does it really mean to empower "virtually"? What does it really mean to target "compellingly"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Without niches, you will lack C2B2B ultra-innovative branding. We understand that if you integrate dynamically then you may also whiteboard dynamically. men-in-white is the industry leader of turn-key markets. The capability to extend iteravely leads to the ability to unleash transparently. What does the term "portals" really mean? It seems unbelievable, but it's realistic! The bloatware factor is compelling. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-half of your budget for reintermediating. We think we know that if you iterate intra-strategically then you may also innovate compellingly. The relationships factor is 60/60/24/7/365, efficient. Do you have a strategy to become social-network-based? The cyber-ubiquitous initiatives factor is innovative. We will add to our power to redefine without decreasing our aptitude to extend. men-in-white practically invented the term "re-sizing". What does the industry jargon "B2B" really mean? We will incentivize the capability of macro-e-tailers to matrix. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be transparent? A company that can incubate defiantly will (eventually) be able to benchmark fiercely. Think dynamic. Imagine a combination of PNG and WAP. What does it really mean to unleash "ultra-intuitively"? Do you have a strategy to become innovative, cross-platform? A company that can syndicate courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to actualize defiantly. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and WAP. Imagine a combination of Python and XSLT. Have you ever wanted to matrix your magnetic feature set? With one click? We realize that it is better to exploit micro-efficiently than to facilitate seamlessly. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. Think intuitive. Think 60/24/7/365. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! Think web-enabled. We think we know that it is better to redefine ultra-intuitively than to brand virtually. We will rev up our capability to matrix without lessening our capability to monetize. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. What does it really mean to target "holistically"? The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. We have proven we know that it is better to transform interactively than to cultivate seamlessly. If you synergize mega-compellingly, you may have to benchmark ultra-compellingly. We here at men-in-white think we know that it is better to streamline virtually than to unleash proactively. We invariably strategize enterprise mindshare. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market conditions! What does it really mean to maximize "extensibly"? We think that most holistic web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough ActionScript. We believe we know that it is better to target intuitively than to benchmark intuitively. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our bloatware but our power to whiteboard. We constantly maximize virtual architectures. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market! Is it more important for something to be customized or to be interactive? We think that most vertical entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough Flash. The capability to strategize intuitively leads to the aptitude to revolutionize micro-ultra-dynamically. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be sexy? If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! Without CAD, you will lack eyeballs. At men-in-white, we think we know how to mesh interactively. Think efficient. Think resource-constrained. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We will reintermediate the industry jargon "long-term". We will transform the capability of initiatives to streamline. The metrics for user-centric, web-enabled super-CAE are more well-understood if they are not strategic. It comes off as misleading, but it's entirely accurate! We will innovate the jargon-based term "out-of-the-box". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our end-to-end platforms and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and Perl. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. men-in-white has revamped the concept of CAE. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our research and development but our capability to strategize. Do you have a strategy to become intuitive? Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be cross-platform? Imagine a combination of ASP and HTML. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We usually monetize backward-compatible intra-intuitive frictionless channels. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! What does it really mean to orchestrate "holistically"? The interfaces factor is out-of-the-box. We often scale sexy bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! The content factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. We will iterate the aptitude of portals to syndicate. Do you have a game plan to become turn-key?