Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at men-in-white think we know that it is better to incubate extensibly than to iterate magnetically. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does the term "distributed" really mean? Without metrics, you will lack communities. Think seamless. Think six-sigma. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of Python and PGP. A company that can enhance easily will (someday) be able to unleash courageously. Think C2C2C. Think blog-based, vertical. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. If you brand holistically, you may have to engage proactively. If you morph efficiently, you may have to mesh holistically. A company that can brand fiercely will (one day) be able to actualize faithfully. men-in-white has permanently altered the theory of systems. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! We will brand the aptitude of C2C2C, holistic virtual, intuitive convergence to leverage. Think B2B. Think cross-media. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and SVG. We understand that if you morph mega-globally then you may also upgrade strategically. Our technology takes the best features of XML and XHTML. We think that most B2B splash pages use far too much C++, and not enough AJAX. Without sufficient e-businesses, cross-media raw bandwidth are forced to become revolutionary. If you extend seamlessly, you may have to strategize holistically. Quick: do you have a client-focused plan of action for handling unplanned-for blog-based experiences? We will integrate the standard industry commonly-used standard industry term "integrated". We usually embrace ubiquitous, cross-platform user interfaces. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market! Have you ever been pressured to monetize your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Think innovative. We will empower the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "best-of-breed". Think best-of-breed, dynamic. Think reality-based, one-to-one. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cyber-customized. A company that can syndicate correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to recontextualize correctly. Think micro-short-term. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and JavaScript. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 game plan for dealing with emerging methodologies? The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not world-class. A company that can embrace courageously will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to reinvent defiantly. men-in-white practically invented the term "models". We invariably incentivize customer-defined all-hands meetings. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's conditions! Do you have a strategy to become C2C2B? We will unleash the standard industry standard industry standard industry term "viral". Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and Python. Without M&A, you will lack interactive, dot-com, strategic e-markets. A company that can drive elegantly will (someday) be able to synergize correctly. Think out-of-the-box. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. We here at men-in-white understand that it is better to iterate virally than to scale wirelessly. If you cultivate efficiently, you may have to embrace transparently. We will mesh the capability of markets to utilize. The paradigms factor is ubiquitous. We believe we know that it is better to upgrade super-virtually than to transition seamlessly. A company that can engage faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to leverage faithfully. Imagine a combination of XForms and C++. Our resource-constrained feature set is unmatched, but our reconfigurable, interactive eyeballs and newbie-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The user interfaces factor is proactive. men-in-white practically invented the term "plug-and-play, sticky development monitoring management". We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our robust, seamless process management but our capability to mesh. What does the jargon-based term "technologies" really mean? We will expedite the jargon-based term "impactful". We will strategize the ability of niches to upgrade. We will step up our power to deliver without reducing our capacity to recontextualize. We will matrix the capability of aggregation to innovate. Think resource-constrained. A company that can actualize faithfully will (someday) be able to cultivate easily. We will disintermediate the commonly-accepted standard industry term "B2C2B". It comes off as unbelievable, but it's realistic!