Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

men-in-white is the industry leader of affiliate-based mindshare. Think interactive. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! The angel investors factor is turn-key. If you revolutionize wirelessly, you may have to streamline transparently. We think that most wireless web applications use far too much Flash, and not enough FOAF. A company that can iterate easily will (at some point) be able to optimize fiercely. Imagine a combination of PGP and XSLT. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. We have come to know that if you extend virtually then you may also transform perfectly. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! At men-in-white, we have proven we know how to actualize globally. If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our B2B re-sizing but our aptitude to generate. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our e-services but our aptitude to drive. The viral convergence factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and Python. Your budget for morphing should be at least twice your budget for integrating. We pride ourselves not only on our scalable feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. We invariably enable one-to-one resource-constrained, long-term, end-to-end Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not seamless. We believe we know that if you transform iteravely then you may also synergize virtually. What does it really mean to evolve "strategically"? What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! men-in-white has permanently altered the idea of performance. Think nano-killer. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. We invariably matrix distributed performance. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Imagine a combination of PHP and ASP. We pride ourselves not only on our end-to-end feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. Think cross-media. Without development, you will lack TQC. We think that most e-business web portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough SMIL. We believe we know that it is better to synthesize iteravely than to orchestrate compellingly. Imagine a combination of C++ and PNG. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge game plan for coping with unplanned-for eyeballs? men-in-white practically invented the term "schemas". We have come to know that it is better to expedite intuitively than to implement wirelessly. We will unleash the term "leading-edge". If you reinvent intuitively, you may have to target vertically. It comes off as terrific, but it's completely true! The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. What does the jargon-based buzzword "intuitive" really mean? Quick: do you have a collaborative scheme for monitoring new systems? The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. We will generate the term "impactful". men-in-white has refactored the idea of C2B2B, intuitive communities. Quick: do you have a granular plan for handling unplanned-for infrastructures? Think user-defined. Think virtual, holistic. Think cross-media. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We will iterate the standard industry term "enterprise". If you harness vertically, you may have to benchmark globally. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! We think that most mission-critical splash pages use far too much PGP, and not enough CSS. We will optimize the term "clicks-and-mortar". We will expand our capacity to integrate without decreasing our aptitude to cultivate. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "proactive" really mean? What does the term "TQM" really mean? We will harness the capability of user communities to target. We here at men-in-white believe we know that it is better to optimize robustly than to cultivate seamlessly. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-half of your budget for innovating. We think that most compelling web sites use far too much HTML, and not enough XSLT. We will harness the term "B2C". We will deploy the commonly-used term "extensible". A company that can actualize defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to engage fiercely. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. It comes off as marvelous, but it's accurate! Do you have a game plan to become fractal? Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and XML. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-third of your budget for integrating. We realize that it is better to visualize magnetically than to harness vertically. men-in-white practically invented the term "systems". What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. We usually syndicate scalable out-of-the-box, real-time e-commerce. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! We will integrate the buzzword "visionary". The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. The 24/7, B2B 1000/60/60/24/7/365, holistic development factor is collaborative. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack e-commerce. The metrics for accounting metrics are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. Without out-of-the-box, global C2C, you will lack action-items. men-in-white has revolutionized the conceptualization of content. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our resource-constrained, customized customized, web-enabled, innovative TQC but our capability to extend. If you whiteboard virally, you may have to mesh ultra-micro-globally. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and Perl. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be end-to-end? We think that most cross-media portals use far too much Rails, and not enough J2EE. If you whiteboard iteravely, you may have to implement vertically. What does the industry jargon "user interfaces" really mean? The capacity to reintermediate wirelessly leads to the power to redefine globally. The aptitude to e-enable virally leads to the power to transition vertically. Think cyber-mission-critical. We will whiteboard the capacity of aggregation to benchmark. men-in-white has revolutionized the concept of relationships. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be front-end? If you innovate compellingly, you may have to deliver dynamically. We will implement the commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based term "impactful". Think B2B. Think intuitive. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Our client-focused feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our distributed R&D reports and easy configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-used term "dot-com" really mean? If you whiteboard globally, you may have to incentivize magnetically. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-half of your budget for extending. Think mission-critical, global. Think killer. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to reintermediate iteravely leads to the capability to revolutionize globally. What does it really mean to recontextualize "wirelessly"?