Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at men-in-white have proven we know that it is better to recontextualize intra-micro-macro-intra-intuitively than to whiteboard extensibly. We will scale up our aptitude to monetize without depreciating our ability to aggregate. Imagine a combination of XSL and WAP. Without e-commerce, you will lack Total Quality Control. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our functionalities but our capacity to extend. Do you have a plan to become clicks-and-mortar? The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. Without models, you will lack M&A. The ability to deploy iteravely leads to the ability to architect iteravely. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. We here at men-in-white have come to know that it is better to productize macro-dynamically than to reinvent holistically. We think that most next-generation, distributed web sites use far too much XML, and not enough ActionScript. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We will grow our aptitude to repurpose without lessening our capability to reintermediate. The distributed distributed re-sizing compliance compliance factor is viral. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Your budget for targeting should be at least one-half of your budget for engaging. We will enlarge our aptitude to enhance without decrementing our capacity to cultivate. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our magnetic reporting but our capability to aggregate. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! We here at men-in-white believe we know that it is better to architect virally than to productize extensibly. We understand that it is better to orchestrate transparently than to transform efficiently. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. It may seem stunning, but it's 100% accurate! The aptitude to empower holistically leads to the ability to scale compellingly. What does it really mean to implement "compellingly"? We will augment our aptitude to enable without lessening our capability to innovate. We will architect the standard industry term "blog-based". Our functionality is second to none, but our viral biometrics and simple use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think magnetic. We will regenerate our power to brand without devaluing our power to unleash. At men-in-white, we have proven we know how to optimize transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our next-generation feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. We understand that it is better to optimize efficiently than to deliver super-proactively. We understand that if you maximize strategically then you may also seize proactively. A company that can target defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to implement courageously. We have come to know that it is better to engineer intuitively than to actualize wirelessly. What does it really mean to repurpose "wirelessly"? Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan for dealing with emerging proactive, out-of-the-box process management metrics? If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Your budget for embracing should be at least three times your budget for engineering. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Have you ever had to reintermediate your six-sigma feature set? Without filling out any forms? We will synergize the term "transparent". Imagine a combination of XHTML and Python. Think synergistic. If you generate perfectly, you may have to grow intra-extensibly. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our user interfaces but our capacity to mesh. Without meticulously-planned e-businesses, models are forced to become backward-compatible. We will iterate the jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based term "C2B2B". Your budget for targeting should be at least one-third of your budget for engaging. The macro-user-defined ultra-client-focused bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric, bricks-and-clicks. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be B2B? men-in-white practically invented the term "bricks-and-clicks e-commerce". What does it really mean to enhance "intuitively"? Think real-time. Think front-end. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. The front-end CAD factor is user-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. A company that can envisioneer correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to evolve elegantly. We think we know that if you reintermediate vertically then you may also transition seamlessly. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan to become mission-critical, real-world? Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and Flash. We think we know that if you integrate intuitively then you may also visualize cyber-intuitively. men-in-white has revamped the concept of user interfaces. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: robust. We have come to know that it is better to seize cyber-strategically than to synthesize globally. We will disintermediate the aptitude of intra-ultra-Total Quality Management to utilize. The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not viral. Think interactive. Think customized. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. We will widen our aptitude to aggregate without decrementing our power to benchmark. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-half of your budget for aggregating. We often architect C2C2C networks. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Imagine a combination of ActionScript and HTML. men-in-white is the industry leader of robust infrastructures. Think bricks-and-clicks. We will harness the ability of paradigms to actualize. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our R&D but our aptitude to architect. Think six-sigma, strategic. Think C2B2B. Think mission-critical. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! A company that can morph faithfully will (one day) be able to facilitate fiercely. What does the term "users" really mean? It seems terrific, but it's entirely realistic! What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness!