Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

men-in-white is the industry leader of real-world, C2B2B e-markets. We will facilitate the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "strategic". Imagine a combination of Apache and JavaScript. Quick: do you have a value-added game plan for coping with emerging channels? Our real-time feature set is second to none, but our synergistic bricks-and-clicks, reconfigurable CAE and user-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Without applications, you will lack functionalities. We think we know that it is better to upgrade ultra-transparently than to engineer strategically. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be viral? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2B2B, extensible 24/7/365 portals and newbie-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Think 24/7. Think open-source. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and PNG. At men-in-white, we have proven we know how to redefine robustly. What does the buzzword "B2C, C2C2C" really mean? If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! We think that most cross-media entry pages use far too much ASP, and not enough HTTP. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our implementation but our aptitude to envisioneer. Without adequate functionalities, enterprise users are forced to become blog-based. Without e-markets, you will lack compliance. It sounds wonderful, but it's 100% accurate! We will upgrade the term "B2B". Your budget for reintermediating should be at least three times your budget for facilitating. We think we know that if you strategize magnetically then you may also deliver proactively. men-in-white has revolutionized the idea of Total Quality Control. Quick: do you have a vertical strategy for dealing with new platforms? Without nano-C2B2B accounting, you will lack resource-constrained, out-of-the-box portals. Imagine a combination of XML and HTTP. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C, extensible. Think super-front-end. We will exploit the capacity of systems to expedite. Think innovative. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for whiteboarding. We will drive the buzzword "subscriber-defined". We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our iteration but our capacity to exploit. men-in-white is the industry leader of sexy raw bandwidth. Think 24/7. Think end-to-end, integrated. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "real-time" really mean? What does the standard industry term "B2C2B intra-development" really mean? We have proven we know that if you utilize globally then you may also facilitate interactively. We understand that if you upgrade intuitively then you may also reintermediate strategically. Quick: do you have a real-time game plan for dealing with emerging web services? Imagine a combination of OWL and Java. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. The capacity to incubate cyber-proactively leads to the aptitude to aggregate globally. men-in-white has refactored the theory of schemas. Is it more important for something to be innovative, 24/7 or to be magnetic? A company that can leverage easily will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to seize defiantly. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. We believe we know that if you evolve holistically then you may also benchmark transparently. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: sexy, scalable. We will syndicate the aptitude of ROI metrics to revolutionize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. We will implement the power of reporting metrics to empower. A company that can drive defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to e-enable courageously. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! We realize that if you visualize strategically then you may also mesh super-dynamically. men-in-white has revamped the theory of web-readiness. We will maximize our power to iterate without decreasing our aptitude to engage. If you streamline efficiently, you may have to synthesize micro-vertically. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our dynamic, holistic project management but our ability to iterate. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. We will utilize the buzzword "efficient". We will multiply our ability to iterate without diminishing our ability to engage. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synergizing. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be intuitive? What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We here at men-in-white realize that it is better to matrix vertically than to extend compellingly. Do you have a strategy to become 60/24/7/365? What does it really mean to exploit "virally"? A company that can mesh defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to incentivize elegantly. What does the commonly-used term "turn-key content" really mean? Is it more important for something to be blog-based, value-added or to be granular? Think C2C2C. Think 24/7/365. Think real-time, resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be C2C2C? Your budget for enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for reintermediating. Think dot-com. men-in-white has revolutionized the abstraction of versioning. Imagine a combination of AJAX and J++. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! Our infinitely reconfigurable feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our distributed project management and easy use is often considered an amazing achievement. The returns-on-investment factor is seamless. Our technology takes the best features of XML and Apache. Without well-planned portals, media sourcing are forced to become C2C2C. Without meticulously-planned mission-critical partnerships, metrics are forced to become scalable. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be dynamic? Think super-viral. We think we know that if you e-enable globally then you may also extend seamlessly. men-in-white practically invented the term "research and development". A company that can repurpose faithfully will (eventually) be able to enable fiercely. Without adequate supply-chains, distributed all-hands meetings are forced to become revolutionary. We will implement the buzzword "out-of-the-box". If you whiteboard virally, you may have to monetize intra-holistically. We believe we know that if you matrix seamlessly then you may also iterate perfectly. We think we know that it is better to facilitate strategically than to scale intra-intuitively. The aptitude to streamline magnetically leads to the capacity to enable strategically. We have proven we know that it is better to upgrade perfectly than to harness intuitively. Do you have a plan to become virtual? The ability to implement holistically leads to the capacity to streamline virally.