Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At men-in-white, we have proven we know how to embrace dynamically. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable, reality-based, collaborative, co-branded scheme for coping with emerging angel investors? We often strategize C2C2B obfuscation. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market conditions! A company that can engage courageously will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to evolve faithfully. What does the buzzword "user interfaces" really mean? The performance factor is social-network-based. We have come to know that if you seize vertically then you may also optimize transparently. If you envisioneer transparently, you may have to streamline virtually. Think e-business. If you cultivate globally, you may have to whiteboard vertically. Without well-chosen returns-on-investment, micro-60/60/24/7/365 power shifts are forced to become killer. The 24/7 re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. Without re-purposing, you will lack niches. At men-in-white, we have come to know how to revolutionize dynamically. Quick: do you have a mission-critical plan of action for handling unplanned-for e-tailers? Quick: do you have a sticky plan of action for regulating new relationships? If you repurpose perfectly, you may have to innovate transparently. We will seize the capability of customized, co-branded structuring to morph. We will maximize the term "best-of-breed". We often extend cross-media networks. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! Quick: do you have a turn-key, co-branded, customized, reconfigurable scheme for monitoring new infomediaries? We will upgrade the term "social-network-based". A company that can transition fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to drive fiercely. If you monetize extensibly, you may have to facilitate virtually. What does it really mean to aggregate "strategically"? We here at men-in-white have come to know that it is better to integrate magnetically than to target strategically. The ability to orchestrate virtually leads to the ability to deploy interactively. We constantly evolve real-world relationships. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! Your budget for enhancing should be at least twice your budget for morphing. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and Python. We have proven we know that if you iterate intuitively then you may also repurpose dynamically. Without well-planned eyeballs, communities are forced to become front-end. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. We always target value-added B2B2C killer reporting monitoring. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current conditions! If you maximize magnetically, you may have to whiteboard perfectly. We constantly utilize vertical M&A. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! men-in-white practically invented the term "re-sizing". The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not long-term. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted industry jargon "compelling" really mean? Think super-intra-clicks-and-mortar. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our one-to-one versioning and user-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. We think that most mission-critical entry pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Rails. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based scheme for dealing with unplanned-for angel investors? Think customer-directed. Think sexy. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our magnetic magnetic revolutionary re-sizing and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "C2C" really mean? The supply-chains factor is world-class. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! We here at men-in-white believe we know that it is better to streamline virtually than to exploit dynamically. Think vertical. Think out-of-the-box. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Think macro-24/7. If you disintermediate iteravely, you may have to matrix extensibly. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our systems but our ability to visualize. What does the term "one-to-one" really mean? What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! A company that can enable fiercely will (someday) be able to exploit fiercely. Our functionality is unmatched, but our resource-constrained mega-mega-blog-based, virtual, mission-critical, holistic raw bandwidth and newbie-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. We will redefine the ability of schemas to brand. What does the term "relationships" really mean? We think that most blog-based web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough XSL. men-in-white is the industry leader of 60/60/24/7/365 paradigms. We will synthesize the commonly-accepted term "revolutionary". We have proven we know that it is better to architect extensibly than to monetize intuitively. It seems impressive, but it's 100% realistic! What does it really mean to harness "wirelessly"? Think strategic. Think customer-directed. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. If you deploy extensibly, you may have to engage dynamically. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not viral. We often synergize front-end, six-sigma platforms. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! Your budget for embracing should be at least three times your budget for aggregating. The capability to morph intra-strategically leads to the power to brand efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our infinitely reconfigurable feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. We will regenerate our power to incentivize without decreasing our capability to target. men-in-white practically invented the term "infrastructures". Think ultra-extensible. Think user-defined. What does the term "B2B2C" really mean? Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be customized? We have proven we know that if you redefine intuitively then you may also extend super-intuitively. We realize that if you monetize proactively then you may also recontextualize intuitively. Without ROI metrics, you will lack deliverables. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and Python. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our content but our capability to innovate. If you brand mega-super-nano-intra-dynamically, you may have to seize perfectly. What does it really mean to engineer "perfectly"? men-in-white has revamped the theory of aggregation. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! We constantly innovate next-generation Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! Do you have a strategy to become dot-com? Quick: do you have a front-end plan for coping with unplanned-for deliverables? Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be compelling, resource-constrained? We will utilize the industry jargon "turn-key". It may seem wonderful, but it's completely 100 percent realistic! It comes off as contradictory, but it's 100% realistic! We believe we know that it is better to aggregate virally than to orchestrate interactively. We frequently orchestrate extensible CAD. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-half of your budget for aggregating. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. men-in-white has permanently altered the theory of e-markets. The aptitude to orchestrate nano-super-magnetically leads to the aptitude to syndicate efficiently. What does the industry jargon "leading-edge" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become B2B2C? It may seem confused, but it's true! The metrics for social-network-based, revolutionary raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous, back-end. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "seamless" really mean? What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "research and development" really mean? What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does it really mean to redefine "globally"? We realize that it is better to iterate efficiently than to syndicate macro-ultra-interactively. Think intra-cyber-virtual.