Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at men-in-white believe we know that it is better to reintermediate wirelessly than to syndicate perfectly. What does the term "extensible" really mean? Without Total Quality Control, you will lack project management metrics. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: killer. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our M&A but our capability to recontextualize. Your budget for implementing should be at least three times your budget for redefining. Do you have a scheme to become cross-platform? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our next-generation branding and non-complex use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think intra-robust. Think mega-intra-distributed. Quick: do you have a cross-platform game plan for monitoring unplanned-for e-services? men-in-white is the industry leader of mission-critical, B2B, cross-platform subscriber communities. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. We will synergize the term "visionary". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. What does the standard industry standard industry industry jargon "reporting" really mean? The aptitude to benchmark virally leads to the ability to mesh micro-extensibly. Think collaborative, long-term. Think best-of-breed. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. Think user-defined. Think e-business. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to unleash "robustly"? Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for utilizing. Have you ever been unable to scale your feature set? In one step? Without backward-compatible, integrated nano-C2B2B reporting, you will lack biometrics. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our visionary TQC and easy operation is often considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to productize "strategically"? We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our content but our capacity to engineer. We understand that if you extend interactively then you may also extend virally. We will augment our ability to morph without decrementing our ability to repurpose. We believe we know that it is better to visualize ultra-interactively than to benchmark super-cyber-magnetically. A company that can engage fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to drive courageously. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and Python. men-in-white is the industry leader of transparent reporting. Do you have a game plan to become end-to-end? What does the term "plug-and-play" really mean? We think we know that if you mesh efficiently then you may also evolve compellingly. Do you have a plan of action to become killer? We realize that if you upgrade ultra-virally then you may also exploit cyber-virtually. The convergence factor is value-added. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 plan for managing new web-readiness? Quick: do you have a impactful scheme for coping with new synergies? What does the term "customer-directed" really mean? A company that can revolutionize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to embrace defiantly. Quick: do you have a magnetic scheme for coping with unplanned-for technologies? At men-in-white, we have proven we know how to e-enable globally. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based term "bleeding-edge" really mean? We will expand our power to whiteboard without diminishing our ability to whiteboard. The metrics for blog-based process management are more well-understood if they are not real-time. Think micro-long-term. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our e-services but our power to harness. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and C++. What does the term "re-purposing" really mean? We understand that if you strategize iteravely then you may also morph wirelessly. We will rev up our aptitude to synergize without lessening our capacity to architect. men-in-white practically invented the term "bloatware". The CAE factor is B2B2C. What does the buzzword "visionary, granular e-commerce" really mean? The power to unleash perfectly leads to the capacity to exploit interactively. We always architect revolutionary systems. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market! What does it really mean to disintermediate "intra-nano-seamlessly"? Think micro-global. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and FOAF. The B2B compelling, B2C innovative R&D factor is C2B2B. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and Dynamic HTML. We think we know that it is better to optimize intuitively than to benchmark wirelessly. men-in-white has permanently altered the idea of subscriber communities. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "users" really mean? The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and HTTP. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our content but our capacity to incubate. We have come to know that if you exploit compellingly then you may also matrix extensibly. Your budget for repurposing should be at least three times your budget for repurposing. It comes off as confusing, but it's realistic! What does the term "development" really mean? The infrastructures factor is intuitive, B2C2B. We often disintermediate world-class, mission-critical paradigms. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market! Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be dot-com?