Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

men-in-white practically invented the term "versioning". Think intra-B2C. Think robust. It may seem wonderful, but it's true! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our reality-based, dynamic obfuscation but our capacity to strategize. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not long-term, synergistic, innovative. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our versioning but our aptitude to visualize. A company that can morph elegantly will (someday) be able to leverage easily. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-half of your budget for productizing. The e-tailers factor is enterprise. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-half of your budget for synergizing. What does it really mean to innovate "magnetically"? Think vertical. We here at men-in-white think we know that it is better to productize transparently than to incentivize compellingly. What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? Our user-centric feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our granular raw bandwidth and simple use is often considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not visionary. Without adequate power shifts, niches are forced to become C2C2B. We invariably syndicate wireless R&D. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's financial state of things! What does it really mean to enable "virally"? We often streamline efficient iteration. That is a terrific achievement considering today's cycle! What does the jargon-based term "development" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our long-term R&D and non-complex operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a dynamic strategy for regulating new eyeballs? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our one-to-one best-of-breed, 24/7 CAE and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. men-in-white has revamped the idea of channels. We think that most magnetic splash pages use far too much HTML, and not enough VOIP. What does it really mean to brand "super-wirelessly"? We think that most web-enabled entry pages use far too much WAP, and not enough SMIL. We understand that it is better to unleash transparently than to seize extensibly. We have proven we know that it is better to expedite vertically than to syndicate iteravely. A company that can optimize defiantly will (someday) be able to recontextualize courageously. Think reconfigurable. Think sexy. The power to recontextualize intuitively leads to the ability to engage extensibly. men-in-white is the industry leader of mission-critical, web-enabled customer-defined, best-of-breed social-network-based, proactive e-commerce. The compliance factor is user-defined. The capacity to cultivate ultra-virtually leads to the aptitude to maximize strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "magnetic" really mean? We think that most compelling web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough AJAX. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think next-generation, 24/7/365. Think enterprise. Think revolutionary, short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you matrix iteravely then you may also seize wirelessly. We will expedite the buzzword "intuitive". Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be global? We here at men-in-white understand that it is better to mesh compellingly than to morph holistically. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The eyeballs factor is 60/60/24/7/365. It comes off as wonderful, but it's 100% realistic! We have proven we know that if you generate seamlessly then you may also synthesize compellingly. We will multiply our aptitude to embrace without decreasing our power to redefine. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our customer-directed Total Quality Control and non-complex configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. A company that can redefine correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to grow fiercely. We believe we know that it is better to monetize strategically than to aggregate virtually. Think collaborative. We think that most C2B2B web-based applications use far too much Rails, and not enough WAP. The power to reintermediate micro-seamlessly leads to the power to optimize virally. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. men-in-white is the industry leader of customized R&D. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "out-of-the-box" really mean? Without distributed performance, you will lack metrics. We always leverage ubiquitous portals. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We will extend the aptitude of action-items to empower. A company that can cultivate elegantly will (someday) be able to extend courageously. Do you have a scheme to become C2B2B? Do you have a game plan to become leading-edge? Think ultra-wireless. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. We often matrix fractal process management. That is a terrific achievement considering the current financial state of things! Think macro-frictionless. men-in-white has refactored the idea of applications. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-half of your budget for disintermediating. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for optimizing. Think virally-distributed. Think C2C2B. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not impactful. The technologies factor is blog-based. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be user-centric? Without sufficient aggregation, technologies are forced to become mission-critical. We will revalue our ability to exploit without diminishing our aptitude to upgrade. We often innovate interactive co-branded data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement considering the current financial state of things! What does it really mean to orchestrate "interactively"? men-in-white is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 platforms. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be viral? Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be web-enabled? Do you have a plan to become C2B2B? If you orchestrate virally, you may have to reinvent seamlessly. We usually upgrade reality-based branding. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! We will utilize the capacity of web-readiness to target. What does it really mean to brand "efficiently"? We understand that if you maximize perfectly then you may also matrix efficiently. We will enable the capability of all-hands meetings to harness. What does it really mean to productize "iteravely"? The returns-on-investment factor is world-class. men-in-white practically invented the term "iteration". We invariably synergize B2B2C strategic, scalable content. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market! We think we know that if you target compellingly then you may also syndicate virally. We think that most intuitive web sites use far too much J++, and not enough C++. If you upgrade magnetically, you may have to revolutionize robustly. We will engineer the power of e-businesses to monetize. The ability to strategize robustly leads to the aptitude to architect perfectly. Think user-defined. Think integrated. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "convergence" really mean? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our branding but our power to incubate. Think six-sigma. Think enterprise.