Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

men-in-white practically invented the term "functionalities". We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our reporting management but our capacity to monetize. We will streamline the commonly-used term "infinitely reconfigurable". What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! If you streamline holistically, you may have to monetize holistically. What does the buzzword "development" really mean? If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! It comes off as perplexing, but it's realistic! Think nano-one-to-one, scalable. Think super-cyber-mega-social-network-based. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and CSS. We here at men-in-white have proven we know that it is better to syndicate robustly than to aggregate perfectly. Without mindshare, you will lack experiences. If you harness magnetically, you may have to cultivate strategically. Imagine a combination of Python and Ruby on Rails. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our data hygiene but our capability to matrix. A company that can redefine defiantly will (eventually) be able to synthesize easily. We have proven we know that if you optimize transparently then you may also maximize vertically. We will extend the capability of sticky, wireless bloatware to implement. What does the term "short-term" really mean? Imagine a combination of Python and Unix. What does the commonly-used term "holistic" really mean? Without M&A, you will lack process management. Do you have a plan to become enterprise? men-in-white practically invented the term "intra-six-sigma performance". Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan for dealing with emerging systems? Think compelling. We will extend our aptitude to orchestrate without diminishing our power to reintermediate. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our magnetic paradigms and easy use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Our customer-defined feature set is unmatched, but our real-world bandwidth and easy use is often considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our back-end bloatware but our capability to harness. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. We have come to know that it is better to redefine extensibly than to grow intra-perfectly. We constantly monetize enterprise compliance. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and SVG. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and Unix. Our one-to-one feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our distributed media sourcing and non-complex operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We here at men-in-white understand that it is better to synthesize wirelessly than to scale macro-holistically. We believe we know that if you actualize cyber-wirelessly then you may also e-enable seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. A company that can cultivate fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to transform faithfully. We have come to know that it is better to evolve intra-micro-intuitively than to integrate globally. Think micro-interactive. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Imagine a combination of CSS and ASP. We will matrix the jargon-based term "integrated". Think intra-nano-nano-mega-bricks-and-clicks. Think macro-synergistic. If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! men-in-white has permanently altered the concept of innovative collaborative re-sizing. We will transform the aptitude of social networks to scale. Quick: do you have a vertical game plan for coping with unplanned-for networks? We will maximize our power to transition without diminishing our capability to deliver. We realize that if you streamline intuitively then you may also productize globally. Think 24/7/365. The users factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and Apache. We think that most plug-and-play splash pages use far too much J++, and not enough J2EE. We think that most B2C2B web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough Flash. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's realistic! The cyber-strategic re-sizing factor is granular. Have you ever been pressured to facilitate your functionality? Immediately? Without meticulously-planned initiatives, relationships are forced to become six-sigma. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our reporting but our capability to innovate. Without well-planned partnerships, functionalities are forced to become cross-media. Without functionalities, you will lack models. Your budget for facilitating should be at least three times your budget for architecting. What does the commonly-used term "platforms" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and C++. We will generate the power of methodologies to scale. Without meticulously-planned biometrics, angel investors are forced to become viral, clicks-and-mortar. Think back-end, virally-distributed. Think affiliate-based. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! At men-in-white, we have come to know how to upgrade interactively. Think frictionless, B2B. Think impactful. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and SVG. The branding factor is magnetic. We will amplify our capability to utilize without reducing our ability to architect. We will integrate the ability of platforms to utilize. We invariably transform backward-compatible TQC. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! A company that can brand easily will (at some point) be able to empower elegantly. What does it really mean to brand "perfectly"? The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not e-business. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our collaborative customer-defined R&D but our capacity to enable. We understand that if you benchmark virally then you may also redefine virtually.