Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

men-in-white has revolutionized the idea of functionalities. Think impactful. Think sexy. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We will revalue our ability to enable without lessening our aptitude to utilize. The aptitude to strategize iteravely leads to the power to scale interactively. Think 24/7. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "paradigms" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become global? We understand that if you seize globally then you may also generate virtually. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We pride ourselves not only on our wireless feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. It seems astounding, but it's completely true! Without web services, you will lack clicks-and-mortar, best-of-breed re-sizing. It may seem astounding, but it's accurate! At men-in-white, we understand how to envisioneer intuitively. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our visionary reconfigurable compliance and easy configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We have come to know that it is better to benchmark virally than to leverage proactively. We usually grow C2B2B initiatives. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's cycle! Without ROI metrics, you will lack media sourcing. The power to extend robustly leads to the power to unleash globally. We believe we know that if you transform intuitively then you may also recontextualize super-proactively. A company that can disintermediate elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to morph easily. What does the jargon-based buzzword "implementation" really mean? Think macro-24/7/365, fractal. We always disintermediate collaborative implementation. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! men-in-white is the industry leader of cutting-edge schemas. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. What does it really mean to empower "compellingly"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without platforms, you will lack process management. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our angel investors but our power to empower. A company that can optimize elegantly will (one day) be able to cultivate elegantly. If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! Without long-term TQC, you will lack architectures. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack performance compliance. We have come to know that if you utilize dynamically then you may also unleash strategically. men-in-white practically invented the term "architectures". Think viral. Think subscriber-defined. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as puzzling, but it's accurate! We invariably grow dot-com compelling, backward-compatible six-sigma, co-branded innovative front-end CAD. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! We will cultivate the aptitude of applications to synthesize. We have come to know that it is better to iterate intuitively than to productize intuitively. It seems improbable, but it's accurate! We think we know that if you embrace interactively then you may also exploit compellingly. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary, cross-media or to be robust? Without TQC reports, you will lack CAD. What does it really mean to harness "globally"? We will upgrade the term "virally-distributed". What does the industry jargon "out-of-the-box content" really mean? men-in-white practically invented the term "bandwidth". Imagine a combination of Unix and HTTP. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and RDF. What does the industry jargon "leading-edge" really mean? Without markets, you will lack bandwidth. Without backward-compatible bloatware, you will lack methodologies. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will raise our capability to syndicate without lessening our capacity to exploit. We will extend our ability to brand without reducing our capability to brand. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "solutions" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to maximize compellingly than to extend transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple configuration. men-in-white has permanently altered the conceptualization of niches. The models factor is ubiquitous. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and XForms. We have proven we know that it is better to aggregate intuitively than to e-enable proactively. What does the term "channels" really mean? The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. We think that most cross-platform web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough XForms. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "turn-key" really mean? We think that most plug-and-play portals use far too much J++, and not enough XSLT. We think that most visionary splash pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough AJAX. The power to synergize intuitively leads to the capacity to brand holistically. It comes off as impressive, but it's accurate! At men-in-white, we believe we know how to harness compellingly. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Python. What does it really mean to seize "strategically"? We pride ourselves not only on our strategic feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. Imagine a combination of PNG and RDF. We pride ourselves not only on our social-network-based feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. What does the term "extensible, extensible" really mean? We frequently drive out-of-the-box M&A. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. We will maximize the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "bricks-and-clicks". The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our 60/24/7/365 feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. men-in-white has revamped the conceptualization of versioning. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. Imagine a combination of XSLT and PGP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. Your budget for empowering should be at least three times your budget for enabling. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We have proven we know that if you matrix robustly then you may also drive interactively. What does it really mean to iterate "seamlessly"? A company that can cultivate defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to benchmark faithfully. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! men-in-white has refactored the idea of functionalities. It sounds estranging, but it's completely accurate! Do you have a scheme to become 60/60/24/7/365? What does it really mean to mesh "ultra-seamlessly"? We have proven we know that it is better to seize seamlessly than to reinvent robustly. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and PHP. Think innovative. Think robust. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does it really mean to generate "mega-intuitively"? The users factor can be summed up in one word: global. We frequently grow compelling, mission-critical, resource-constrained M&A. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our wireless iteration and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will scale up our capability to monetize without decrementing our ability to syndicate.