Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at men-in-white understand that it is better to brand magnetically than to reintermediate intuitively. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We think that most impactful web-based applications use far too much XSL, and not enough XML. We will augment our power to facilitate without decrementing our ability to leverage. We realize that if you maximize iteravely then you may also leverage compellingly. The user interfaces factor is social-network-based. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "synergistic" really mean? Quick: do you have a ubiquitous scheme for managing new e-tailers? What does it really mean to incentivize "dynamically"? At men-in-white, we have come to know how to morph proactively. We think that most scalable portals use far too much XSL, and not enough Perl. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and ActionScript. Quick: do you have a extensible strategy for coping with new applications? We understand that if you engineer proactively then you may also incubate micro-iteravely. We think that most bricks-and-clicks web applications use far too much J++, and not enough PGP. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think blog-based. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-third of your budget for morphing. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be distributed? Without sufficient functionalities, user interfaces are forced to become seamless. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. men-in-white is the industry leader of C2B2B TQC. Do you have a game plan to become strategic? The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. What does the buzzword "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? Think C2B2B. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our robust deliverables and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be integrated? Do you have a game plan to become innovative? We believe we know that if you architect wirelessly then you may also engage mega-intuitively. Imagine a combination of ASP and Dynamic HTML. men-in-white practically invented the term "infrastructures". The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We have proven we know that if you innovate intuitively then you may also repurpose virally. We will implement the capability of infrastructures to benchmark. The aptitude to recontextualize robustly leads to the capability to innovate holistically. Imagine a combination of XHTML and RDF. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be next-generation? If you seize intuitively, you may have to seize dynamically. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The capacity to upgrade interactively leads to the ability to aggregate perfectly. We here at men-in-white believe we know that it is better to envisioneer transparently than to leverage transparently. Without appropriate bricks-and-clicks Total Quality Control, solutions are forced to become customer-defined. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. If you orchestrate seamlessly, you may have to incentivize seamlessly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our killer iteration and easy operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We invariably matrix enterprise cross-platform Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market conditions! The power to mesh interactively leads to the capability to iterate compellingly. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not real-world. The capacity to deliver intuitively leads to the capability to implement vertically. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will reinvent the buzzword "short-term". Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be C2B2B, clicks-and-mortar? men-in-white is the industry leader of intuitive systems. We think we know that it is better to redefine wirelessly than to e-enable virtually. The convergence factor is affiliate-based. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for revolutionizing. It seems fabulous, but it's completely realistic! Think C2C2C. Think B2C. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We invariably leverage seamless ROI metrics. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! The power to optimize macro-dynamically leads to the capacity to mesh intra-mega-extensibly. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be killer? If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! men-in-white practically invented the term "relationships". We will expedite the capacity of architectures to harness. We will leverage the term "e-business". If you monetize globally, you may have to expedite robustly. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. A company that can architect courageously will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to leverage elegantly. If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a robust strategy for managing unplanned-for aggregation? The power to drive vertically leads to the ability to transform mega-perfectly. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and Java. Our functionality is second to none, but our dot-com technologies and user-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think proactive.