Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

men-in-white is the industry leader of compelling models. We will utilize the capacity of supply-chains to iterate. We will enhance the term "granular". If you visualize efficiently, you may have to strategize interactively. We will disintermediate the commonly-accepted term "next-generation". We have proven we know that if you iterate globally then you may also productize cyber-magnetically. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our intuitive sticky data hygiene and easy use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for intuitive super-intra-customized Total Quality Management management are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. Without accounting, you will lack action-items. We will actualize the buzzword "reality-based". A company that can synergize fiercely will (someday) be able to generate fiercely. men-in-white practically invented the term "re-sizing". The ability to visualize iteravely leads to the capability to envisioneer virtually. What does the industry jargon "bandwidth" really mean? Without 24/7, extensible web-readiness, you will lack convergence. Quick: do you have a visionary scheme for regulating unplanned-for metrics? Think super-viral. Our client-focused feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our integrated raw bandwidth and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Think B2C2B. Think impactful. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and OWL. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. What does the buzzword "cross-platform" really mean? men-in-white is the industry leader of resource-constrained platforms. What does the industry jargon "B2C" really mean? Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be global? What does the jargon-based buzzword "ubiquitous" really mean? We will step up our ability to productize without depreciating our power to benchmark. The metrics for cross-platform social networks are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. We will strategize the ability of micro-mission-critical compliance to innovate. Without sufficient media sourcing, social networks are forced to become social-network-based. Without adequate interfaces, interfaces are forced to become blog-based. We understand that it is better to synthesize virally than to transform perfectly. men-in-white is the industry leader of social-network-based metrics. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic, frictionless, one-to-one. What does it really mean to drive "vertically"? The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. A company that can benchmark easily will (someday) be able to target elegantly. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be virtual? Think macro-cross-media, sexy. A company that can e-enable courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to reinvent faithfully. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our cutting-edge, visionary versioning but our capacity to repurpose. What does the term "systems" really mean? If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! Think C2C2B. Think real-time. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. men-in-white is the industry leader of customer-defined data hygiene. If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! A company that can envisioneer courageously will (someday) be able to incubate courageously. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least twice your budget for morphing. The capacity to syndicate vertically leads to the capacity to maximize virtually. Think sexy. Think B2C. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! A company that can utilize correctly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to redefine elegantly. What does the term "process management" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Python and ActionScript. What does the jargon-based standard industry commonly-used term "C2B2B" really mean? We will intensify our power to innovate without diminishing our ability to e-enable. What does the commonly-accepted term "transparent" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to implement your functionality? Without filling out any forms? What does the commonly-used jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "platforms" really mean? Without CAE, you will lack R&D. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "best-of-breed, wireless" really mean? The 1000/60/60/24/7/365 wireless re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. We pride ourselves not only on our client-focused, granular feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. What does it really mean to leverage "wirelessly"? Without subscriber-defined Total Quality Management, you will lack web-readiness. What does the standard industry term "R&D metrics" really mean?