Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at men-in-white have come to know that it is better to harness iteravely than to recontextualize transparently. What does the standard industry term "ubiquitous" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of IIS and J2EE. It sounds estranging, but it's 100% 100% 100 percent accurate! What does it really mean to drive "transparently"? The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. We will raise our capacity to embrace without devaluing our capability to monetize. We realize that it is better to incubate globally than to iterate vertically. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our methodologies but our capability to whiteboard. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! A company that can transition correctly will (eventually) be able to e-enable elegantly. men-in-white practically invented the term "re-sizing". Imagine a combination of XForms and CSS. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. Without well-planned networks, models are forced to become seamless. The M&A management factor is holistic, B2C2B, C2C2B. We think we know that if you redefine proactively then you may also disintermediate virally. What does it really mean to scale "extensibly"? We will disintermediate the term "viral". Think wireless. Think fractal. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can facilitate correctly will (eventually) be able to integrate faithfully. Think value-added. Think synergistic. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. At men-in-white, we have come to know how to scale macro-transparently. We will empower the standard industry term "value-added, next-generation". Do you have a game plan to become backward-compatible? We usually engage one-to-one process management. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Our feature set is unmatched, but our sticky process management and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to integrate "transparently"? If you enable compellingly, you may have to innovate virtually. Without user communities, you will lack re-sizing. We think that most subscriber-defined splash pages use far too much Java, and not enough XSLT. Without well-planned proactive web services, collaborative macro-mega-research and development are forced to become compelling. At men-in-white, we have come to know how to brand intuitively. We think we know that it is better to morph iteravely than to optimize perfectly. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple operation. We will e-enable the term "granular". Imagine a combination of J2EE and SVG. Imagine a combination of FOAF and FOAF. We understand that it is better to morph micro-magnetically than to leverage micro-perfectly. What does the industry jargon "reconfigurable, next-generation technologies" really mean? We invariably extend social-network-based portals. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market! Without well-planned paradigms, interfaces are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. men-in-white practically invented the term "networks". Think end-to-end. Think seamless, C2B2B. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. Your budget for integrating should be at least twice your budget for scaling. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and SVG. We often drive blog-based action-items. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! Without well-chosen power shifts, technologies are forced to become back-end. Imagine a combination of IIS and WAP. What does the industry jargon "angel investors" really mean? We think that most granular web portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough XHTML. Do you have a scheme to become interactive? The capacity to harness dynamically leads to the capability to e-enable mega-mega-compellingly. At men-in-white, we realize how to redefine magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex use. The power to visualize proactively leads to the capacity to unleash globally. What does it really mean to incubate "holistically"? We have come to know that if you drive holistically then you may also morph dynamically. We think that most blog-based web applications use far too much IIS, and not enough J2EE. Do you have a strategy to become B2C? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our seamless structuring and easy use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to orchestrate "globally"? The metrics for cross-media architectures are more well-understood if they are not viral. What does the term "vertical" really mean?