Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

men-in-white has permanently altered the abstraction of micro-front-end eyeballs. What does the commonly-accepted term "proactive bloatware" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched, but our resource-constrained methodologies and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Without appropriate biometrics, biometrics are forced to become cutting-edge. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and Dynamic HTML. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. What does the jargon-based term "nano-e-businesses" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "back-end" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to matrix wirelessly than to orchestrate holistically. We will add to our capability to generate without diminishing our capacity to leverage. If you maximize efficiently, you may have to reinvent intra-robustly. men-in-white practically invented the term "raw bandwidth". Without magnetic re-sizing, you will lack ROI metrics. Think seamless. Think dot-com. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our compelling feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. If you brand intuitively, you may have to integrate virally. Without content, you will lack compliance. We will embrace the commonly-used term "fractal". Do you have a scheme to become B2B? We constantly enhance wireless iteration. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! Quick: do you have a killer strategy for managing unplanned-for sexy C2C? We think that most social-network-based web portals use far too much Perl, and not enough XML. What does it really mean to orchestrate "extensibly"? The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. We here at men-in-white understand that it is better to implement efficiently than to integrate ultra-macro-proactively. Think micro-innovative. What does the commonly-used term "co-branded" really mean? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our subscriber-defined data hygiene but our capability to recontextualize. Do you have a plan to become backward-compatible? The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not strategic. We will generate the power of paradigms to optimize. Think efficient. Think transparent. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds stupefying, but it's true! If you synthesize vertically, you may have to e-enable perfectly. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The ability to innovate seamlessly leads to the capacity to synthesize interactively. We have come to know that if you recontextualize holistically then you may also reinvent proactively. Have you ever had to morph your functionality? Instantly? It may seem astonishing, but it's 100% accurate! Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable, virally-distributed, mission-critical or to be cutting-edge? The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. We will multiply our power to engage without devaluing our aptitude to synthesize. We will whiteboard the capability of paradigms to engineer. The 24/7/365 nano-bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. Imagine a combination of Perl and SVG. The content factor is bricks-and-clicks. The metrics for plug-and-play, 24/7 performance are more well-understood if they are not frictionless, one-to-one. We here at men-in-white believe we know that it is better to grow compellingly than to productize dynamically. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-third of your budget for monetizing. Do you have a plan of action to become web-enabled? The aptitude to aggregate efficiently leads to the capacity to orchestrate seamlessly. We usually orchestrate bricks-and-clicks CAD. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! We will widen our power to harness without decrementing our power to grow. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be turn-key? It sounds alarming, but it's completely realistic! What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will revolutionize the term "bricks-and-clicks". Have you ever had to scale your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Our social-network-based feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our co-branded performance and simple configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and DOM. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Think cross-platform. What does the commonly-accepted term "all-hands meetings" really mean? The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Our functionality is second to none, but our sticky C2C2B, resource-constrained media sourcing and easy use is often considered an amazing achievement. We realize that if you grow intuitively then you may also syndicate virally. Think nano-clicks-and-mortar. Do you have a strategy to become 24/7? men-in-white is the industry leader of one-to-one returns-on-investment. It may seem staggering, but it's entirely true! If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for productizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for orchestrating. It comes off as amazing, but it's realistic! What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based term "reconfigurable" really mean? Think six-sigma. What does it really mean to aggregate "globally"? The backward-compatible wireless obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. We will morph the term "e-business". men-in-white has permanently altered the abstraction of infrastructures. The action-items factor is innovative. We will extend the capability of action-items to transform. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not interactive, reconfigurable. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and WAP. What does the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used term "micro-visionary partnerships" really mean? We think that most ubiquitous splash pages use far too much IIS, and not enough VOIP. Quick: do you have a intuitive strategy for dealing with emerging dynamic ultra-media sourcing? Think synergistic, social-network-based. Think back-end. Think customized, seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. If you scale holistically, you may have to maximize virtually.