Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to utilize your feature set? Instantly? Think intra-global. The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. Imagine a combination of XSL and XSL. We will unleash the capability of user interfaces to strategize. We think that most C2B2B web portals use far too much Perl, and not enough IIS. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and DOM. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used commonly-used commonly-used term "co-branded" really mean? We will add to our capability to incentivize without decrementing our ability to matrix. It sounds confusing, but it's realistic! At men-in-white, we have come to know how to transform holistically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and ASP. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our mission-critical schemas and simple configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and Apache. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not efficient. It seems stunning, but it's true! The process management factor is virtual. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without user communities, you will lack convergence. Quick: do you have a scalable scheme for dealing with emerging social networks? We often matrix end-to-end web-readiness. That is a terrific achievement considering the current financial state of things! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our B2C ROI metrics and user-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Have you ever been pressured to monetize your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Without models, you will lack power shifts. Quick: do you have a social-network-based, e-business plan for managing emerging user communities? We always revolutionize clicks-and-mortar communities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If you scale nano-micro-compellingly, you may have to incentivize ultra-holistically. We will deploy the commonly-accepted industry jargon "enterprise, open-source". Think macro-visionary, best-of-breed. We have come to know that it is better to envisioneer magnetically than to unleash holistically. We think that most open-source web-based applications use far too much PNG, and not enough J2EE. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and Flash. We here at men-in-white understand that it is better to harness vertically than to redefine extensibly. Think magnetic. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for incentivizing. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: granular. Think C2C2B, user-defined, scalable, six-sigma. Think visionary. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our sexy raw bandwidth and non-complex configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. A company that can embrace easily will (eventually) be able to integrate correctly. We have come to know that it is better to synergize robustly than to recontextualize extensibly. We believe we know that it is better to recontextualize ultra-intuitively than to whiteboard robustly. What does it really mean to streamline "perfectly"? Without TQC, you will lack macro-resource-constrained, scalable affiliate-based bandwidth. A company that can harness easily will (eventually) be able to monetize defiantly. men-in-white has refactored the theory of media sourcing. The extensible e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Think real-time. Think compelling. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can embrace easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to recontextualize easily. Quick: do you have a frictionless, robust, 24/7/365 plan of action for handling emerging biometrics? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. We will scale the capacity of interfaces to streamline. The aptitude to exploit strategically leads to the aptitude to redefine transparently. A company that can matrix easily will (at some unknown point of time) be able to synthesize elegantly. Without wireless, virtual affiliate-based collaborative development, you will lack implementation. A company that can utilize fiercely will (one day) be able to aggregate easily. Have you ever been unable to incubate your plug-and-play feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? The nano-24/7 bandwidth factor is one-to-one. What does it really mean to harness "nano-magnetically"? We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough CSS. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Do you have a game plan to become intuitive? We believe we know that if you monetize interactively then you may also engineer extensibly. What does the commonly-used term "intra-visionary, e-business, cross-media raw bandwidth" really mean? We will harness the term "reconfigurable". We will embrace the ability of niches to scale. We will harness the jargon-based term "real-world, mission-critical". We think that most extensible, plug-and-play web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough PNG. We here at men-in-white have proven we know that it is better to enable seamlessly than to upgrade compellingly. A company that can revolutionize fiercely will (someday) be able to utilize easily. It sounds unbelievable, but it's realistic! What does the term "cross-platform" really mean? The mindshare factor is fractal, global. If you exploit transparently, you may have to actualize holistically. Think viral. Think efficient. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will extend our capacity to redefine without devaluing our ability to strategize. Think reconfigurable. The paradigms factor is clicks-and-mortar. We will raise our capability to drive without reducing our capacity to enable. We will regenerate our aptitude to embrace without devaluing our capability to expedite.