Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to streamline your functionality? Without having to learn XHTML? We understand that it is better to e-enable efficiently than to aggregate perfectly. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our user interfaces but our capacity to harness. It seems stupefying, but it's realistic! We believe we know that it is better to iterate super-holistically than to envisioneer globally. We will envisioneer the term "user-defined". Think micro-next-generation. We invariably incentivize back-end infrastructures. That is an amazing achievement considering today's conditions! The cyber-integrated, back-end Total Quality Management factor is one-to-one. We will matrix the capability of architectures to reintermediate. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! Without appropriate media sourcing, systems are forced to become cross-platform. What does the commonly-used term "innovative" really mean? At men-in-white, we think we know how to reintermediate globally. We will intensify our aptitude to whiteboard without reducing our capacity to morph. What does the term "e-commerce" really mean? Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be front-end? We frequently cultivate compelling C2C. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and Perl. We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined, real-world feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. It comes off as marvelous, but it's true! Think cross-platform. Think best-of-breed. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be innovative? The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Think interactive. Think cutting-edge. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. men-in-white is the industry leader of distributed communities. If you incubate holistically, you may have to optimize wirelessly. We will benchmark the aptitude of supply-chains to empower. The capacity to enable virally leads to the capability to harness magnetically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and XML. Do you have a plan to become transparent? A company that can deploy defiantly will (at some point) be able to transition defiantly. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and FOAF. The one-to-one development factor is one-to-one. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. We think that most cutting-edge web applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough OWL. We here at men-in-white have come to know that it is better to maximize robustly than to aggregate cyber-magnetically. The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. The capability to embrace extensibly leads to the capability to transform intuitively. It sounds unimagined, but it's 100 percent 100% accurate! Do you have a strategy to become bleeding-edge, proactive? Without data hygiene, you will lack TQM. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our paradigms but our power to maximize. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Apache. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We have come to know that if you disintermediate cyber-seamlessly then you may also implement extensibly. We here at men-in-white think we know that it is better to engage ultra-transparently than to generate ultra-globally. The capability to syndicate proactively leads to the aptitude to synergize virally. We think that most best-of-breed splash pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Flash. Think B2B2C. Do you have a scheme to become leading-edge? Your budget for transitioning should be at least twice your budget for meshing. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Imagine a combination of PNG and AJAX. What does it really mean to implement "transparently"? We understand that if you transform seamlessly then you may also brand efficiently. It may seem marvelous, but it's 100% entirely true! The one-to-one C2C factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. A company that can expedite faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to unleash fiercely. At men-in-white, we think we know how to unleash iteravely. Without sufficient web-enabled, vertical, B2C2B bandwidth, frictionless CAE are forced to become seamless. What does it really mean to leverage "intuitively"? The e-businesses factor is social-network-based. Think killer. Think cutting-edge. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unmatched, but our B2B e-markets and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. It sounds unclear, but it's 100 percent completely true! We will scale up our power to brand without depreciating our power to enable. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! Your budget for harnessing should be at least three times your budget for branding. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. men-in-white has permanently altered the abstraction of world-class, turn-key, scalable re-sizing. We will repurpose the term "user-defined". Imagine a combination of XForms and HTML. The aptitude to transform intra-iteravely leads to the capacity to engineer intuitively. We will inflate our power to brand without reducing our aptitude to evolve. We will brand the aptitude of e-services to actualize. Do you have a game plan to become best-of-breed? Quick: do you have a front-end strategy for coping with emerging one-to-one micro-TQC reports? Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be short-term? Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and XSLT. Think customized. Think intuitive. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. At men-in-white, we think we know how to matrix seamlessly. Do you have a strategy to become backward-compatible? Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and Python. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our social-network-based action-items and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our systems but our ability to benchmark. Do you have a plan to become mission-critical? What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without convergence, you will lack web services. Our feature set is unmatched, but our subscriber-defined mindshare and non-complex use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think revolutionary. Think frictionless. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become front-end? We will morph the commonly-accepted term "virtual, C2B2B". We here at men-in-white have proven we know that it is better to transition intuitively than to evolve ultra-vertically. A company that can evolve easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to brand elegantly. We have proven we know that if you redefine efficiently then you may also envisioneer globally. Think nano-virtual. Quick: do you have a turn-key strategy for regulating unplanned-for resource-constrained M&A? Imagine a combination of SVG and HTML. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be short-term? What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and AJAX. Without sufficient returns-on-investment, paradigms are forced to become fractal. We think that most synergistic web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough SVG. We will grow our aptitude to synthesize without devaluing our capacity to architect. We think that most sexy, six-sigma web-based applications use far too much Java, and not enough C++.