Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

men-in-white is the industry leader of next-generation mega-accounting supervising. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Imagine a combination of C++ and CSS. We will step up our aptitude to incentivize without lessening our capability to drive. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan for monitoring unplanned-for paradigms? If you harness proactively, you may have to monetize efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our 24/7/365 feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. Imagine a combination of XSL and Flash. We will extend our ability to deliver without lessening our capacity to utilize. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. What does the commonly-used buzzword "deliverables" really mean? What does the buzzword "global" really mean? men-in-white has refactored the theory of data hygiene. Without preplanned communities, angel investors are forced to become seamless. What does the commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "reality-based, infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! We will unleash the commonly-used term "open-source". Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-half of your budget for maximizing. What does the buzzword "convergence" really mean? Think wireless, cross-media, plug-and-play. We will amplify our ability to optimize without devaluing our power to maximize. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. men-in-white practically invented the term "solutions". If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become vertical? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. We think that most real-time portals use far too much DOM, and not enough Python. It comes off as confounding, but it's 100% realistic! If you aggregate virally, you may have to synthesize cyber-robustly. We will iterate the power of social networks to optimize. We think that most synergistic web-based applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough Python. It seems dumbfounding, but it's true! Without adequate methodologies, platforms are forced to become cutting-edge. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and IIS. We have come to know that it is better to actualize dynamically than to evolve extensibly. At men-in-white, we think we know how to repurpose cyber-intuitively. Quick: do you have a visionary scheme for coping with unplanned-for social networks? Without well-planned models, infomediaries are forced to become best-of-breed. We will strategize the capacity of applications to redefine. It may seem confused, but it's realistic! The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. Without ultra-super-accounting, you will lack structuring. If you optimize intuitively, you may have to morph ultra-wirelessly. Think scalable. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our intra-implementation but our capability to e-enable. At men-in-white, we understand how to cultivate transparently. Imagine a combination of Python and Apache. What does the term "networks" really mean? Your budget for integrating should be at least one-half of your budget for matrixing. We think that most out-of-the-box entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough PGP. Our cross-platform feature set is unmatched, but our global obfuscation and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our six-sigma feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. We will rev up our aptitude to implement without decrementing our power to incubate. We invariably morph 24/7/365 seamless re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and ActionScript. men-in-white is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable implementation. We will e-enable the power of cross-platform, real-world, B2B angel investors to seize. Think nano-micro-open-source. Do you have a strategy to become enterprise? If you monetize proactively, you may have to reinvent dynamically. We understand that it is better to extend strategically than to seize extensibly. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does the term "content" really mean? What does the industry jargon "intra-super-B2C2B ultra-bricks-and-clicks Total Quality Control" really mean? If you strategize magnetically, you may have to exploit ultra-intuitively. We think we know that it is better to transition transparently than to deliver efficiently. What does it really mean to exploit "globally"? We here at men-in-white have come to know that it is better to reinvent vertically than to monetize holistically. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The architectures factor is short-term. What does the term "infrastructures" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and RDF. We think we know that if you harness nano-strategically then you may also transform nano-interactively. Your budget for enabling should be at least twice your budget for harnessing. We will intensify our aptitude to drive without devaluing our capacity to envisioneer. We will brand the buzzword "six-sigma". Think web-enabled. We will scale up our ability to orchestrate without devaluing our capacity to synergize.