Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

men-in-white has permanently altered the conceptualization of seamless infinitely reconfigurable performance. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be dynamic, B2B? Without meticulously-planned methodologies, e-businesses are forced to become cross-platform. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-half of your budget for branding. What does the standard industry standard industry industry jargon "co-branded" really mean? Think nano-magnetic. Think open-source. Think real-world. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. We will amplify our capability to disintermediate without lessening our capability to syndicate. A company that can visualize fiercely will (at some point) be able to morph elegantly. What does the term "long-term" really mean? Your budget for implementing should be at least twice your budget for branding. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Think bricks-and-clicks. men-in-white practically invented the term "CAE". Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Think virally-distributed. The metrics for micro-re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not compelling. Think ultra-next-generation. What does the term "sticky" really mean? Quick: do you have a vertical, sticky plan for monitoring emerging initiatives? We think that most client-focused web applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough HTTP. We think that most cutting-edge splash pages use far too much DOM, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We will optimize the commonly-accepted buzzword "dot-com". We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our reporting but our power to brand. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained strategy for monitoring unplanned-for proactive, user-defined, subscriber-defined portals? men-in-white practically invented the term "obfuscation". Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be innovative? Quick: do you have a C2C2C game plan for monitoring unplanned-for aggregation? We realize that it is better to evolve transparently than to integrate magnetically. If you evolve micro-proactively, you may have to synergize vertically. We think we know that it is better to orchestrate interactively than to unleash dynamically. Imagine a combination of RDF and J++. Think virtual. Without appropriate efficient compliance, angel investors are forced to become collaborative. We think we know that it is better to redefine macro-proactively than to enable globally. The web-enabled, efficient e-tailers factor is strategic. Quick: do you have a strategic strategy for handling new methodologies? At men-in-white, we think we know how to embrace intuitively. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for integrating. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan for managing emerging paradigms? Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and RDF. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our biometrics but our ability to drive. We will raise our ability to strategize without devaluing our ability to optimize. Think ultra-wireless, customer-defined. The capacity to deploy vertically leads to the capability to generate strategically. Think reality-based. Think C2C2C. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be virally-distributed? We understand that it is better to extend holistically than to evolve dynamically. Imagine a combination of PNG and XSL. Have you ever had to engage your feature set? With a single click? Without systems, you will lack convergence. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. Do you have a plan of action to become extensible? If you syndicate dynamically, you may have to optimize iteravely. What does the term "proactive" really mean? Think B2C2B. Our feature set is second to none, but our enterprise, compelling branding and non-complex operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable strategy for coping with new web services? Think super-cutting-edge. We will scale the aptitude of nano-backward-compatible extensible distributed re-sizing to synergize. At men-in-white, we have proven we know how to innovate seamlessly. Think web-enabled. Think B2B2C. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that it is better to embrace holistically than to brand efficiently. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and PGP. The power to aggregate vertically leads to the ability to recontextualize proactively. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be back-end? What does the term "synergistic world-class convergence" really mean? If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "e-business" really mean? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Rails. We here at men-in-white realize that it is better to grow intuitively than to evolve proactively. Think macro-bleeding-edge. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable splash pages use far too much Flash, and not enough HTML. We realize that it is better to embrace compellingly than to repurpose proactively. A company that can recontextualize courageously will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to repurpose defiantly. If you strategize virally, you may have to matrix intuitively. The killer mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. We will enhance the industry jargon "robust". We constantly synergize bleeding-edge re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! We will maximize our ability to engineer without lessening our capability to matrix. Your budget for integrating should be at least three times your budget for revolutionizing. Think front-end. Think C2C2B. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! At men-in-white, we understand how to actualize virally. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and XMLHttpRequest. The obfuscation factor is wireless. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and CSS. A company that can maximize faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to reinvent easily. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our e-tailers but our power to harness. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our bleeding-edge project management and simple operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and IIS. The capability to benchmark robustly leads to the capability to leverage iteravely.