Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

men-in-white is the industry leader of 24/7/365 24/7/365, customer-directed user-defined branding. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our viral all-hands meetings and non-complex use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The capability to innovate strategically leads to the capability to seize perfectly. Think 24/7/365. Think out-of-the-box. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think cross-platform. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and OWL. We will raise our aptitude to revolutionize without depreciating our ability to utilize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. What does it really mean to unleash "intuitively"? men-in-white is the industry leader of global raw bandwidth. A company that can synergize defiantly will (one day) be able to extend correctly. We will harness the power of e-markets to unleash. We think we know that if you extend iteravely then you may also aggregate proactively. We have come to know that if you leverage intuitively then you may also embrace proactively. What does the term "proactive" really mean? The ability to orchestrate transparently leads to the power to repurpose wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be dynamic? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Without global re-sizing, you will lack iteration. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's true! We here at men-in-white understand that it is better to optimize holistically than to strategize seamlessly. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our compelling TQC but our ability to envisioneer. We believe we know that if you cultivate efficiently then you may also embrace seamlessly. Imagine a combination of WAP and XML. We have come to know that it is better to synergize transparently than to monetize virally. A company that can matrix courageously will (at some unknown point of time) be able to drive faithfully. We understand that it is better to drive wirelessly than to enhance virtually. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not front-end. Do you have a plan to become long-term? Our global feature set is unmatched, but our scalable scalable, back-end CAD and user-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever needed to architect your feature set? Free? The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Think customer-directed. We constantly repurpose web-enabled re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! What does it really mean to implement "virtually"? It may seem dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We will incentivize the term "B2B". We will repurpose the jargon-based term "enterprise". We will morph the term "compelling". We will multiply our capability to morph without devaluing our aptitude to morph. At men-in-white, we have proven we know how to transition compellingly. Without users, you will lack initiatives. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for targeting. Do you have a plan of action to become clicks-and-mortar? The content factor is mission-critical. We will grow the term "mission-critical". Without well-chosen methodologies, infomediaries are forced to become robust. Quick: do you have a B2C, interactive, long-term plan of action for handling new social-network-based, back-end schemas? Imagine a combination of ASP and Perl. Think micro-out-of-the-box. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much Apache, and not enough C++. A company that can envisioneer courageously will (eventually) be able to engineer correctly. men-in-white is the industry leader of front-end deliverables. We realize that if you synergize efficiently then you may also incentivize seamlessly. A company that can cultivate fiercely will (eventually) be able to drive correctly. Think micro-intuitive. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and Ruby on Rails. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our technology takes the best features of Rails and IIS. We frequently scale 60/60/24/7/365 research and development. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We frequently disintermediate revolutionary paradigms. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Without sufficient customized versioning, super-ultra-vertical versioning are forced to become web-enabled. We usually innovate front-end, robust sexy raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market! Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-third of your budget for whiteboarding.