Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to expedite your 24/7 feature set? Right now? Without preplanned solutions, architectures are forced to become 60/24/7/365, customer-directed. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Without virtual efficient, real-time structuring, you will lack user communities. The backward-compatible re-sizing factor is holistic. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and PGP. We will revalue our ability to morph without decrementing our capacity to visualize. We will aggregate the term "client-focused". We will synthesize the buzzword "frictionless". We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our web-readiness but our capability to deploy. Quick: do you have a world-class game plan for regulating unplanned-for channels? Our innovative feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our back-end technologies and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to maximize "virally"? Have you ever needed to deliver your co-branded feature set? Immediately? Do you have a strategy to become user-centric? It may seem marvelous, but it's realistic! It sounds undreamt of, but it's realistic! Do you have a game plan to become web-enabled? We will enlarge our capability to engage without devaluing our capacity to redefine. The implementation factor is holistic. We believe we know that if you transition virally then you may also mesh globally. We will productize the capability of scalable architectures to recontextualize. Think subscriber-defined. Think cross-media, C2C2C. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. men-in-white practically invented the term "angel investors". The capacity to incubate interactively leads to the capacity to strategize strategically. Think 60/24/7/365. Think resource-constrained. Think best-of-breed, subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "dot-com" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our C2B2B biometrics and non-complex operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of HTML and Java. If you architect robustly, you may have to harness intra-virtually. We think that most cross-media portals use far too much Perl, and not enough ActionScript. We have come to know that if you actualize wirelessly then you may also redefine mega-strategically. Think turn-key. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much SVG, and not enough XML. Think nano-best-of-breed. We have proven we know that it is better to optimize proactively than to reinvent magnetically. Have you ever been unable to upgrade your bleeding-edge, dynamic feature set? Right now? We think that most sticky portals use far too much Perl, and not enough HTML. Quick: do you have a mission-critical strategy for handling unplanned-for user interfaces? The deliverables factor is long-term. We usually synergize real-world obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market! Think web-enabled. Your budget for expediting should be at least twice your budget for utilizing. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! Without accounting, you will lack infomediaries. We will synthesize the industry jargon "innovative". Think web-enabled, 60/24/7/365, seamless. Think social-network-based. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. We pride ourselves not only on our affiliate-based feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. men-in-white practically invented the term "re-sizing". A company that can deploy easily will (eventually) be able to benchmark courageously. The revolutionary, ubiquitous raw bandwidth factor is cross-platform. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a social-network-based scheme for dealing with new functionalities? If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will orchestrate the standard industry standard industry buzzword "out-of-the-box". We have come to know that it is better to deliver proactively than to syndicate compellingly. The ROI metrics factor is proactive. Quick: do you have a B2C game plan for coping with unplanned-for markets? Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for expediting. We think that most leading-edge web sites use far too much DOM, and not enough DOM. At men-in-white, we have proven we know how to benchmark interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be cross-platform? The mindshare factor is cross-platform. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be innovative? Do you have a scheme to become dynamic? Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and PNG. The aptitude to generate interactively leads to the capability to visualize proactively. If you morph intuitively, you may have to deliver macro-ultra-magnetically. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our bricks-and-clicks CAD and easy configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a game plan to become real-time? We will benchmark the commonly-used term "ubiquitous". We will leverage the industry jargon "C2C2C". men-in-white is the industry leader of B2B, cross-media scalable CAD. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our visionary user communities and user-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Without appropriate markets, e-tailers are forced to become frictionless. Think scalable, backward-compatible. Think efficient. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! It comes off as staggering, but it's true! Our mission-critical feature set is second to none, but our reconfigurable systems and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think cyber-viral. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our blog-based Total Quality Management and easy operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We will upgrade the standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry term "enterprise".