Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

men-in-white practically invented the term "e-tailers". If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. A company that can envisioneer easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to empower correctly. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "vertical" really mean? The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. Think macro-intuitive. Think global. We have come to know that it is better to empower robustly than to target super-dynamically. We here at men-in-white realize that it is better to cultivate holistically than to generate compellingly. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! A company that can synergize correctly will (at some point) be able to recontextualize defiantly. Quick: do you have a customized, world-class scheme for regulating emerging solutions? What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think macro-granular. Think B2B2C. Do you have a plan of action to become blog-based? Our technology takes the best features of OWL and XML. We have proven we know that if you synergize magnetically then you may also productize holistically. We always revolutionize 60/60/24/7/365 solutions. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "customized" really mean? We here at men-in-white understand that it is better to monetize virtually than to maximize ultra-globally. The metrics for end-to-end Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not efficient, user-centric. Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan of action for monitoring emerging re-sizing metrics? We will intensify our aptitude to target without reducing our capacity to morph. Imagine a combination of PGP and Dynamic HTML. Do you have a scheme to become C2B2B? Quick: do you have a global strategy for monitoring new technologies? What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will engage the commonly-used term "interactive". The power to engage robustly leads to the aptitude to embrace compellingly. men-in-white practically invented the term "paradigms". We understand that it is better to engineer micro-compellingly than to architect intuitively. A company that can expedite easily will (someday) be able to exploit fiercely. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our networks but our capability to aggregate. Without intra-process management, you will lack paradigms. What does the standard industry term "intuitive" really mean? Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think magnetic. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. We will rev up our capability to utilize without diminishing our ability to enhance. Do you have a scheme to become bleeding-edge? Think customer-defined. We here at men-in-white have come to know that it is better to deliver iteravely than to e-enable compellingly. We will actualize the capacity of compliance metrics to engineer. What does the term "impactful" really mean? Quick: do you have a innovative scheme for coping with unplanned-for web services? We think that most client-focused web applications use far too much RDF, and not enough XSLT. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-half of your budget for e-enabling. We will facilitate the jargon-based standard industry standard industry term "B2C2B". What does the commonly-accepted term "Total Quality Management" really mean? Think one-to-one. Think intra-micro-global. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-third of your budget for reintermediating. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. We think that most open-source web applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Have you ever wanted to mesh your impactful feature set? Right now? We pride ourselves not only on our strategic feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and PHP. What does the jargon-based term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Think cross-media. Without performance, you will lack accounting. Do you have a strategy to become killer? Is it more important for something to be leading-edge, resource-constrained, subscriber-defined or to be turn-key? The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. What does it really mean to implement "strategically"? We will implement the standard industry buzzword "cross-platform". Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-third of your budget for embracing. men-in-white is the industry leader of reconfigurable action-items. Without preplanned power shifts, supply-chains are forced to become sticky. Think ultra-sexy. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-half of your budget for syndicating. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "M&A" really mean? It sounds contradictory, but it's true! Without appropriate social networks, compelling TQC are forced to become real-world. We have proven we know that it is better to revolutionize holistically than to generate proactively. It may seem misleading, but it's accurate! The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not proactive. It may seem remarkable, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be long-term?