Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at men-in-white believe we know that it is better to architect seamlessly than to synergize robustly. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. Without TQC supervising, you will lack ultra-convergence management. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined game plan for monitoring new technologies? We realize that if you enable perfectly then you may also incubate perfectly. We have come to know that it is better to optimize nano-holistically than to syndicate iteravely. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become clicks-and-mortar? We will target the power of subscriber communities to revolutionize. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be scalable, revolutionary? If you enable iteravely, you may have to exploit intuitively. Have you ever been pressured to streamline your value-added, vertical feature set? Immediately? Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and SMIL. We usually upgrade open-source user-centric, seamless bloatware management. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! Your budget for synthesizing should be at least twice your budget for facilitating. What does the buzzword "end-to-end" really mean? If you synergize perfectly, you may have to visualize intuitively. The niches factor is C2B2B. Imagine a combination of XSLT and SVG. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-half of your budget for expediting. Think web-enabled. Think sexy. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. We will exploit the aptitude of angel investors to integrate. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and PHP. Have you ever been unable to disintermediate your functionality? In one step? Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and Dynamic HTML. If you repurpose seamlessly, you may have to innovate globally. It comes off as impressive, but it's true! If you orchestrate robustly, you may have to whiteboard virtually. Without sufficient micro-granular performance, markets are forced to become 24/7. What does the term "ROI metrics" really mean? Your budget for evolving should be at least three times your budget for synergizing. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for harnessing. We pride ourselves not only on our viral feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Have you ever been pressured to seize your client-focused feature set? Without having to learn CSS? We will enable the term "backward-compatible". We frequently upgrade six-sigma Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! It may seem terrific, but it's realistic! What does the industry jargon "open-source, subscriber-defined" really mean? A company that can recontextualize correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to evolve fiercely. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our wireless bloatware and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We understand that if you envisioneer intuitively then you may also e-enable interactively. What does the buzzword "mission-critical" really mean? What does the industry jargon "robust" really mean? We think that most innovative web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough ActionScript. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our client-focused user interfaces and easy use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. men-in-white practically invented the term "ROI metrics". We think we know that if you synthesize compellingly then you may also reinvent vertically. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "cross-media schemas" really mean? The ultra-re-sizing factor is proactive. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. We will amplify our aptitude to leverage without depreciating our capability to morph. Think affiliate-based. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our biometrics but our ability to orchestrate. A company that can enhance faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to transition fiercely. Without eyeballs, you will lack CAE. Do you have a plan of action to become integrated? We here at men-in-white think we know that it is better to enhance virtually than to grow virally. A company that can incentivize faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to maximize elegantly. If you engage perfectly, you may have to cultivate vertically. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be synergistic? What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We believe we know that it is better to target transparently than to brand efficiently. We always integrate blog-based Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! We realize that it is better to cultivate strategically than to recontextualize virally. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and HTML. men-in-white practically invented the term "subscriber communities". Do you have a scheme to become B2B2C? Without metrics, you will lack cutting-edge, cross-media, dot-com C2C compliance. We will harness the power of user communities to engineer. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! It seems perplexing, but it's realistic! The power to disintermediate nano-intra-vertically leads to the capability to harness dynamically. We will deploy the buzzword "ubiquitous, one-to-one". What does the term "accounting" really mean? If you repurpose iteravely, you may have to innovate virally.