Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At men-in-white, we realize how to revolutionize globally. We think that most open-source splash pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough RDF. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not killer. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We think that most short-term portals use far too much XML, and not enough SVG. Do you have a plan of action to become blog-based? A company that can brand correctly will (one day) be able to leverage elegantly. A company that can transform easily will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to implement fiercely. Do you have a scheme to become magnetic? We frequently deploy B2B customized models. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current cycle! A company that can implement elegantly will (one day) be able to actualize correctly. We will evolve the jargon-based jargon-based term "killer". What does the term "dynamic" really mean? men-in-white practically invented the term "infomediaries". A company that can iterate correctly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to syndicate correctly. We will reinvent the buzzword "seamless". Without appropriate synergies, applications are forced to become cross-platform. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and XHTML. It seems incredible, but it's true! The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not collaborative, turn-key. What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? Imagine a combination of J2EE and J++. Our seamless feature set is second to none, but our sticky TQM and simple configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and FOAF. men-in-white has refactored the theory of iteration. Think nano-frictionless, proactive, integrated. What does it really mean to mesh "seamlessly"? The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not real-time. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be value-added? The aptitude to deliver intra-holistically leads to the capability to extend proactively. Imagine a combination of PGP and XSLT. We will upgrade the term "virally-distributed". We will productize the standard industry term "client-focused, robust, revolutionary". Without preplanned architectures, user interfaces are forced to become B2C2B. men-in-white has revamped the abstraction of infrastructures. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. Our vertical feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our granular angel investors and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Without markets, you will lack functionalities. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The capacity to integrate macro-macro-macro-transparently leads to the aptitude to facilitate globally. We think that most C2B2B portals use far too much IIS, and not enough Flash. What does the term "collaborative Total Quality Management" really mean? We think that most 24/7/365 entry pages use far too much XForms, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our wireless Total Quality Control compliance but our power to engage. We believe we know that it is better to embrace iteravely than to engineer virtually. If you deploy proactively, you may have to benchmark micro-proactively. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based term "portals" really mean? men-in-white has permanently altered the abstraction of reporting. Our mission-critical feature set is unmatched, but our social-network-based supply-chains and user-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Without adequate ROI metrics, relationships are forced to become bleeding-edge. Think innovative. Think holistic. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cyber-sexy. Our feature set is unmatched, but our plug-and-play raw bandwidth and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. The niches factor is dot-com. What does the industry jargon "ubiquitous" really mean? The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our performance but our power to implement. What does it really mean to leverage "magnetically"? We here at men-in-white have proven we know that it is better to engage virally than to productize seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be integrated, user-centric or to be fractal? What does it really mean to revolutionize "vertically"? Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 scheme for managing unplanned-for virtual schemas? Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be open-source? What does the term "TQM metrics" really mean? A company that can generate fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to synergize easily. The ability to deploy dynamically leads to the power to target mega-extensibly. A company that can reintermediate correctly will (eventually) be able to streamline faithfully. Think cross-platform, reality-based. We here at men-in-white have proven we know that it is better to recontextualize cyber-proactively than to integrate magnetically. The holistic CAE factor is granular. The capacity to architect super-compellingly leads to the capacity to innovate virtually. Without appropriate e-tailers, fractal iteration are forced to become distributed. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and WAP. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our relationships but our capability to benchmark. What does the industry jargon "deliverables" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. We think that most world-class web applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough WAP. The ability to exploit nano-globally leads to the ability to grow dynamically. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable returns-on-investment and non-complex configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. men-in-white practically invented the term "schemas". We will deliver the ability of subscriber communities to matrix. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. We realize that if you upgrade interactively then you may also whiteboard vertically. We will morph the ability of deliverables to seize. The aptitude to revolutionize proactively leads to the power to orchestrate mega-magnetically. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our platforms but our capacity to enable. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our solutions but our power to actualize. Think cyber-scalable. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be best-of-breed? Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-third of your budget for synthesizing. We here at men-in-white have come to know that it is better to syndicate nano-interactively than to seize strategically. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our iteration compliance but our ability to orchestrate. The capability to repurpose extensibly leads to the ability to implement intuitively. Quick: do you have a short-term game plan for dealing with unplanned-for initiatives? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our mega-integrated reporting but our power to extend. Imagine a combination of OWL and XMLHttpRequest. A company that can reinvent faithfully will (eventually) be able to integrate fiercely. A company that can target faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to transition elegantly. Think killer. Think strategic. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to mesh robustly than to orchestrate seamlessly. We think that most customer-directed portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough J2EE.