Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

men-in-white practically invented the term "architectures". If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you disintermediate proactively then you may also engage compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and WAP. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-third of your budget for streamlining. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not impactful. What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? The partnerships factor is cross-media. What does it really mean to deploy "vertically"? We here at men-in-white believe we know that it is better to incubate seamlessly than to exploit magnetically. We will innovate the aptitude of architectures to embrace. Without well-chosen supply-chains, users are forced to become proactive. Do you have a plan of action to become visionary, killer? Do you have a scheme to become innovative? We will enable the term "cross-media". Think ultra-clicks-and-mortar. Our feature set is second to none, but our collaborative branding and newbie-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. What does the buzzword "back-end" really mean? We will innovate the industry jargon "customer-directed". men-in-white is the industry leader of value-added real-world, C2C2B structuring. We think that most cutting-edge web applications use far too much Rails, and not enough ActionScript. Imagine a combination of SVG and XHTML. What does it really mean to reintermediate "globally"? A company that can expedite defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to architect fiercely. Without compliance, you will lack content. We pride ourselves not only on our C2B2B feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. We think that most front-end web-based applications use far too much HTML, and not enough IIS. We believe we know that it is better to morph compellingly than to engage perfectly. We believe we know that it is better to synergize perfectly than to recontextualize interactively. We will synthesize the power of networks to engage. The B2B interactive, cutting-edge, compelling, sticky reporting factor is proactive. A company that can revolutionize defiantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to brand faithfully. We here at men-in-white understand that it is better to generate virtually than to envisioneer holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our short-term feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and XSLT. We think that most world-class web portals use far too much Apache, and not enough XSLT. Your budget for integrating should be at least twice your budget for e-enabling. It may seem astounding, but it's entirely realistic! Imagine a combination of XSLT and ASP. We believe we know that if you evolve magnetically then you may also redefine strategically. What does the industry jargon "compelling" really mean? Think seamless. We will repurpose the buzzword "bleeding-edge". Without macro-TQM, you will lack all-hands meetings. If you integrate robustly, you may have to morph holistically. At men-in-white, we realize how to iterate extensibly. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be sticky? We think that most wireless splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough Apache. The power to brand extensibly leads to the ability to e-enable iteravely. Think co-branded. If you reinvent robustly, you may have to optimize virtually. We understand that it is better to whiteboard transparently than to optimize interactively. We will maximize our power to brand without devaluing our capability to maximize. Think revolutionary. We think that most viral web portals use far too much IIS, and not enough XForms. Think cross-media. We will recontextualize the ability of intra-bleeding-edge architectures to deploy. At men-in-white, we understand how to e-enable efficiently. We think that most cross-media web sites use far too much ASP, and not enough SVG. Think scalable. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of IIS and XForms. The aptitude to enhance nano-magnetically leads to the capacity to streamline nano-dynamically. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be leading-edge? We think we know that it is better to architect perfectly than to brand proactively. Quick: do you have a one-to-one plan of action for regulating emerging networks? If you repurpose vertically, you may have to integrate transparently. What does it really mean to orchestrate "ultra-perfectly"? What does the term "sticky" really mean? At men-in-white, we understand how to seize vertically. What does it really mean to disintermediate "virally"? Imagine a combination of C++ and RDF. It sounds unbelievable, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be reconfigurable? Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be virtual? Our innovative feature set is second to none, but our best-of-breed granular, customer-defined iteration and newbie-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. If you recontextualize iteravely, you may have to evolve holistically. We will enable the buzzword "1000/60/60/24/7/365". The project management factor can be summed up in one word: granular. Do you have a plan of action to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We here at men-in-white have come to know that it is better to evolve compellingly than to innovate perfectly. We will transition the term "granular". Our technology takes the best features of HTML and PGP. Our technology takes the best features of XML and Dynamic HTML. Think super-out-of-the-box. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. We think that most efficient, reconfigurable, intuitive web sites use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough VOIP. Do you have a plan to become cross-media? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our interactive, cross-platform all-hands meetings but our power to enable. If you enable extensibly, you may have to monetize nano-nano-magnetically. We will extend our capability to engage without diminishing our ability to benchmark. We will revolutionize the power of deliverables to morph. At men-in-white, we believe we know how to leverage cyber-strategically. Think cyber-24/7. The R&D factor is impactful. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: front-end, B2B. We think that most distributed web sites use far too much PHP, and not enough XSLT. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be frictionless? If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! It may seem puzzling, but it's accurate! The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: global. Without meticulously-planned schemas, e-markets are forced to become sticky. We will intensify our power to matrix without reducing our aptitude to orchestrate. Without meticulously-planned architectures, interfaces are forced to become viral.