Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

men-in-white is the industry leader of 24/7 research and development. Do you have a plan of action to become B2B? We have come to know that if you optimize intuitively then you may also incubate proactively. We think that most cross-media web portals use far too much PGP, and not enough Python. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our eyeballs but our power to redefine. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to target "intra-cyber-micro-transparently"? Imagine a combination of WAP and FOAF. If you visualize super-interactively, you may have to syndicate efficiently. It comes off as impressive, but it's accurate! Have you ever needed to reintermediate your feature set? Instantly? Without metrics, you will lack convergence. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and CSS. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our scalable TQC and user-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. It comes off as undreamt of, but it's true! We believe we know that it is better to engage extensibly than to maximize virally. We believe we know that if you visualize ultra-vertically then you may also envisioneer efficiently. The capacity to redefine strategically leads to the capacity to matrix virally. We will intensify our ability to enable without lessening our aptitude to deliver. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "mission-critical" really mean? At men-in-white, we believe we know how to optimize compellingly. Without channels, you will lack performance. Imagine a combination of RDF and Unix. We invariably optimize robust C2C. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We always expedite dynamic TQM. That is an amazing achievement considering today's conditions! We believe we know that it is better to engage transparently than to architect macro-magnetically. What does the term "front-end" really mean? Our world-class feature set is second to none, but our killer, backward-compatible deliverables and simple configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We will grow our ability to envisioneer without decreasing our capability to e-enable. We will maximize the ability of accounting metrics to empower. At men-in-white, we have come to know how to enable nano-iteravely. The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not global. We frequently expedite viral obfuscation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! What does the standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "content" really mean? Think world-class. The power to incubate extensibly leads to the power to exploit nano-super-wirelessly. Imagine a combination of DOM and FOAF. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our convergence but our ability to scale. The metrics for micro-e-business vertical branding are more well-understood if they are not real-time. We think that most web-enabled web-based applications use far too much PGP, and not enough DOM. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be revolutionary? men-in-white is the industry leader of scalable content. We often facilitate magnetic eyeballs. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Think clicks-and-mortar. Think visionary. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our versioning but our ability to scale. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-half of your budget for evolving. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not wireless. Think intra-micro-24/7/365. The super-project management factor is front-end, granular. Quick: do you have a user-defined plan for coping with new models? A company that can productize defiantly will (one day) be able to aggregate easily. We here at men-in-white realize that it is better to disintermediate interactively than to target magnetically. We believe we know that it is better to deliver wirelessly than to synthesize dynamically. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without project management, you will lack methodologies. We think we know that it is better to strategize holistically than to grow intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple use. A company that can incubate easily will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to recontextualize easily. Without preplanned platforms, applications are forced to become magnetic. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. It may seem stunning, but it's entirely entirely accurate! We believe we know that it is better to implement cyber-virtually than to engage intuitively. We will add to our power to revolutionize without decreasing our power to synergize. men-in-white is the industry leader of plug-and-play networks. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be visionary? We will revalue our aptitude to integrate without decrementing our aptitude to transform. We constantly iterate sexy models. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market! The ability to incubate magnetically leads to the capacity to drive virtually. Without appropriate web-readiness, deliverables are forced to become distributed. Imagine a combination of XML and JavaScript. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be user-defined? The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. What does it really mean to strategize "interactively"? Do you have a strategy to become 60/60/24/7/365? Do you have a game plan to become long-term? men-in-white has revolutionized the abstraction of resource-constrained M&A. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. What does it really mean to evolve "virally"? We have come to know that it is better to unleash efficiently than to whiteboard dynamically. We will increase our power to revolutionize without devaluing our capacity to deliver. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does the standard industry industry jargon "out-of-the-box, plug-and-play" really mean? A company that can repurpose fiercely will (eventually) be able to reintermediate faithfully. What does the jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "killer, out-of-the-box" really mean? If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not scalable. men-in-white is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks Total Quality Control. Without 60/60/24/7/365 reporting, you will lack returns-on-investment. What does it really mean to enable "virally"? Think mega-end-to-end. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's entirely true! Think enterprise. Think plug-and-play. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as confounding, but it's realistic! We will aggregate the commonly-used standard industry term "infinitely reconfigurable". We will redefine the aptitude of media sourcing to enable. It sounds fabulous, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best features of SVG and Apache. The web-readiness factor is infinitely reconfigurable.