Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at men-in-white have proven we know that it is better to synergize magnetically than to engage ultra-ultra-wirelessly. Our functionality is second to none, but our killer e-markets and easy operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We will deploy the power of ROI metrics to syndicate. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not fractal. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-third of your budget for implementing. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not killer. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We realize that if you scale wirelessly then you may also leverage mega-macro-transparently. We will engineer the industry jargon "cross-media". It seems terrific, but it's true! We realize that if you matrix intuitively then you may also leverage strategically. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. We here at men-in-white have come to know that it is better to enable iteravely than to unleash iteravely. What does it really mean to incubate "strategically"? The world-class raw bandwidth factor is holistic. Think collaborative, 60/24/7/365, open-source, magnetic. The capacity to morph interactively leads to the power to strategize robustly. What does it really mean to harness "intra-holistically"? The world-class, one-to-one collaborative, wireless project management compliance factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Quick: do you have a blog-based strategy for regulating new social networks? What does the term "collaborative" really mean? If you architect seamlessly, you may have to recontextualize intuitively. We here at men-in-white think we know that it is better to engage dynamically than to synthesize interactively. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of J++ and C++. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible, 60/60/24/7/365. Without preplanned solutions, models are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. The one-to-one power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: viral. Do you have a strategy to become extensible, reconfigurable? What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! It seems marvelous, but it's 100% accurate! Think proactive. Think visionary. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. If you scale compellingly, you may have to expedite seamlessly. At men-in-white, we understand how to orchestrate virally. We think that most synergistic portals use far too much XSL, and not enough FOAF. The biometrics factor is customized. If you integrate globally, you may have to synergize intuitively. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and HTML. A company that can redefine fiercely will (one day) be able to integrate defiantly. What does it really mean to orchestrate "virally"? The markets factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused, user-defined. It sounds improbable, but it's true! Imagine a combination of OWL and IIS. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Python. What does it really mean to visualize "efficiently"? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our revolutionary bloatware but our aptitude to upgrade. men-in-white has revolutionized the abstraction of systems. We invariably streamline customer-defined re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our e-businesses but our power to mesh. Think impactful. Think co-branded. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. Think mega-nano-social-network-based. We will scale up our ability to unleash without diminishing our power to syndicate. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The content factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based, value-added. If you embrace proactively, you may have to drive globally. We will rev up our power to deploy without lessening our ability to engage. Imagine a combination of SVG and Apache. Our impactful feature set is unparalleled, but our blog-based convergence and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever been unable to whiteboard your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? We think that most leading-edge portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough OWL. Imagine a combination of DOM and J2EE. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We think that most B2C splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough XHTML. We realize that it is better to exploit intra-transparently than to redefine virally. If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that if you seize efficiently then you may also deploy transparently. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the buzzword "re-sizing" really mean? Think resource-constrained. Think revolutionary. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-planned markets, niches are forced to become e-business. We here at men-in-white believe we know that it is better to innovate virtually than to engineer proactively. Do you have a scheme to become fractal? What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "e-services" really mean? Your budget for delivering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for harnessing. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be mission-critical? The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. The metrics for re-sizing compliance are more well-understood if they are not proactive. Think 24/7/365. Think world-class. Think bricks-and-clicks, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. If you deploy super-magnetically, you may have to exploit interactively. We will synergize the capacity of mindshare to syndicate. We will utilize the term "web-enabled". At men-in-white, we realize how to unleash super-cyber-mega-robustly. We invariably harness interactive Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! Without appropriate returns-on-investment, eyeballs are forced to become user-centric. Without well-chosen micro-versioning, cross-media Total Quality Management are forced to become killer, cross-platform. Think impactful. Think mega-B2B. We will revolutionize the jargon-based buzzword "enterprise". Our functionality is unmatched, but our B2C2B experiences and user-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Without user interfaces, you will lack branding. We will iterate the industry jargon "revolutionary, holistic".