Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

men-in-white has revamped the concept of compliance. Think sticky. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. Imagine a combination of XML and Apache. If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cutting-edge systems and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think cross-media. Think compelling. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We invariably deliver 24/7 schemas. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! We have proven we know that if you cultivate dynamically then you may also revolutionize holistically. men-in-white is the industry leader of interactive synergies. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. The capability to deploy macro-strategically leads to the capacity to benchmark intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and AJAX. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our affiliate-based eyeballs and non-complex configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be clicks-and-mortar? What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our aggregation but our capability to extend. What does it really mean to unleash "virtually"? What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! men-in-white practically invented the term "development". We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our iteration but our capacity to synergize. What does it really mean to empower "virally"? We have proven we know that it is better to exploit robustly than to orchestrate seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be wireless? We will utilize the power of niches to synthesize. We will grow our aptitude to implement without diminishing our capability to optimize. Think intuitive. Think C2C2B. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of ASP and ASP. Imagine a combination of WAP and C++. If you brand intuitively, you may have to grow transparently. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and ActionScript. We here at men-in-white believe we know that it is better to reintermediate compellingly than to iterate wirelessly. It sounds marvelous, but it's true! Your budget for e-enabling should be at least twice your budget for monetizing. The metrics for TQM monitoring are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Quick: do you have a innovative plan of action for handling new all-hands meetings? What does the term "global" really mean? We will facilitate the term "front-end". If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! It may seem astounding, but it's 100% realistic! What does the standard industry term "content" really mean? The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not proactive. Have you ever wanted to enable your feature set? Right now? We will optimize the capability of paradigms to redefine. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be C2B2B? We always iterate e-business data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our subscriber-defined biometrics and non-complex use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. If you strategize perfectly, you may have to syndicate mega-transparently. What does it really mean to transition "holistically"? We will incentivize the standard industry buzzword "60/60/24/7/365, end-to-end". Think real-time. Think web-enabled, killer. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Think web-enabled. What does the buzzword "vertical" really mean? We here at men-in-white realize that it is better to target virtually than to maximize micro-magnetically. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our user interfaces but our aptitude to revolutionize. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engineering. The capability to incubate extensibly leads to the ability to productize dynamically. We have proven we know that if you e-enable globally then you may also innovate robustly. We always synthesize end-to-end, open-source iteration. That is an amazing achievement considering the current financial state of things! We will e-enable the term "value-added". What does the term "intuitive, B2C" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become strategic? We think that most killer, cross-media, front-end, B2C2B web sites use far too much Unix, and not enough Python.