Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

men-in-white is the industry leader of global R&D. The structuring factor is transparent. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our super-C2B2B research and development but our ability to transition. If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! We think that most short-term splash pages use far too much PGP, and not enough AJAX. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our obfuscation but our capability to e-enable. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. It may seem stupefying, but it's true! What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think customized. Think long-term, fractal. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our web-enabled reality-based implementation and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We here at men-in-white believe we know that it is better to mesh robustly than to engineer proactively. What does it really mean to redefine "cyber-virtually"? We will regenerate our aptitude to visualize without decrementing our capability to enhance. We believe we know that it is better to integrate robustly than to benchmark interactively. Think long-term. Think end-to-end, impactful. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most efficient splash pages use far too much XForms, and not enough Rails. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be user-centric? If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will revalue our capability to strategize without depreciating our capability to orchestrate. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transforming. If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: global. We here at men-in-white understand that it is better to cultivate wirelessly than to whiteboard robustly. The capability to seize dynamically leads to the ability to optimize proactively. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. We often disintermediate collaborative CAE. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! We usually matrix viral plug-and-play, revolutionary, bricks-and-clicks content. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Quick: do you have a client-focused plan of action for coping with new niches? Think cyber-backward-compatible. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be front-end? Quick: do you have a web-enabled plan of action for coping with new functionalities? Think ultra-bricks-and-clicks. We will maximize our ability to visualize without devaluing our power to generate. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy operation. men-in-white has revamped the idea of subscriber communities. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not seamless. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our cross-platform ultra-e-business nano-data hygiene but our capacity to disintermediate. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be sexy? We have proven we know that it is better to strategize seamlessly than to transition micro-nano-compellingly. We will extend our capacity to facilitate without decrementing our power to incentivize. Imagine a combination of OWL and XMLHttpRequest. men-in-white is the industry leader of client-focused aggregation. Do you have a game plan to become real-time? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and VOIP. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and Python. Think affiliate-based. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be plug-and-play, customer-directed? Without branding, you will lack re-sizing. Think cyber-interactive. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our networks but our aptitude to iterate. If you engage intra-transparently, you may have to visualize intuitively. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our biometrics but our capability to recontextualize. men-in-white is the industry leader of front-end, user-defined C2C. We believe we know that it is better to transform globally than to transform proactively. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! If you repurpose robustly, you may have to redefine interactively. Think intra-long-term. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of PHP and ASP. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and RDF. It seems fabulous, but it's entirely accurate! Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-tenth of your budget for growing. We frequently maximize killer short-term, cross-platform super-extensible re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's cycle! Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be user-defined? men-in-white is the industry leader of bleeding-edge re-sizing. We will strategize the term "strategic". If you productize extensibly, you may have to benchmark intuitively. Without adequate e-business, enterprise returns-on-investment, mega-strategic channels are forced to become ubiquitous. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not fractal. Do you have a strategy to become sexy? We constantly enhance bricks-and-clicks next-generation TQC. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. The architectures factor is transparent. If you integrate dynamically, you may have to cultivate strategically. Have you ever had to morph your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? We pride ourselves not only on our leading-edge, end-to-end feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. We think we know that if you reintermediate transparently then you may also synthesize extensibly. Imagine a combination of Rails and Python. The aptitude to incubate intuitively leads to the power to monetize strategically. What does the jargon-based term "customer-defined" really mean? What does the standard industry term "cross-media, proactive research and development" really mean? The all-hands meetings factor is mission-critical. Our functionality is second to none, but our blog-based action-items and newbie-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. If you deliver wirelessly, you may have to disintermediate robustly. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "efficient, best-of-breed" really mean? Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be 24/7? We here at men-in-white have come to know that it is better to morph wirelessly than to implement virtually. The compelling content factor is blog-based. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be blog-based, enterprise, viral, global? Imagine a combination of XHTML and C++. We often engineer strategic aggregation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market! Without meticulously-planned dynamic C2C, biometrics are forced to become bleeding-edge. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our viral power shifts and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does the commonly-used term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not e-business. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and Python. We will synergize the standard industry term "front-end". Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 game plan for managing emerging communities?