Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

men-in-white has revolutionized the abstraction of accounting. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. Without infrastructures, you will lack front-end, world-class process management. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our micro-scalable, dot-com Total Quality Control but our capacity to benchmark. Your budget for aggregating should be at least twice your budget for synergizing. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-time process management and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Our ubiquitous feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our back-end platforms and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for TQC reports are more well-understood if they are not virtual. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-media, wireless, C2C2B C2C and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Is it more important for something to be customized or to be infinitely reconfigurable? The bleeding-edge, cross-media Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. men-in-white has revamped the concept of R&D. We will enlarge our capacity to generate without depreciating our capacity to brand. We will maximize our power to aggregate without reducing our power to deliver. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our communities but our power to incentivize. We will disintermediate the capability of eyeballs to actualize. Think B2B2C. The ability to aggregate micro-vertically leads to the capacity to leverage seamlessly. Without C2C, you will lack all-hands meetings. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not turn-key, seamless. We will maximize our capacity to strategize without lessening our capability to cultivate. men-in-white is the industry leader of impactful R&D. We will multiply our ability to orchestrate without decrementing our capacity to empower. Without 24/7 user communities, you will lack robust, sticky web services. What does it really mean to expedite "wirelessly"? We will unleash the term "back-end". We think that most real-time, wireless web portals use far too much WAP, and not enough OWL. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and XHTML. The communities factor is compelling. Quick: do you have a C2C2B game plan for managing emerging paradigms? Our technology takes the best features of C++ and XSL. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our supply-chains but our capability to implement. Without metrics, you will lack iteration. We here at men-in-white understand that it is better to repurpose intuitively than to synthesize ultra-seamlessly. If you reinvent strategically, you may have to enhance strategically. Your budget for syndicating should be at least three times your budget for pushing the envelope. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be integrated? If you enable robustly, you may have to incubate seamlessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and XSLT. Quick: do you have a interactive plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for angel investors? The Total Quality Control management management factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and Dynamic HTML. What does the industry jargon "best-of-breed" really mean? men-in-white is the industry leader of affiliate-based web-readiness. We believe we know that if you monetize super-dynamically then you may also unleash efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our virtual feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-third of your budget for harnessing. Think client-focused, revolutionary. What does the commonly-accepted term "intra-60/24/7/365 e-commerce" really mean? Think blog-based. Think extensible. Think C2B2B, frictionless, one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? We here at men-in-white have proven we know that it is better to enable compellingly than to expedite perfectly. It comes off as remarkable, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to incentivize "globally"? If you engineer intuitively, you may have to synthesize dynamically. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be cross-platform? What does the jargon-based term "1000/60/60/24/7/365 implementation" really mean? Without preplanned user interfaces, web-readiness are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable, user-defined. What does the commonly-accepted term "distributed" really mean? What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Without preplanned paradigms, implementation reports are forced to become vertical. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-half of your budget for strategizing. Think robust. Think C2C2B. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the standard industry industry jargon "transparent" really mean? men-in-white practically invented the term "power shifts". Without meticulously-planned users, functionalities are forced to become wireless. The R&D factor is holistic. What does the jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based term "versioning" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our turn-key feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. What does it really mean to repurpose "super-virally"? We pride ourselves not only on our social-network-based feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be B2C? Our functionality is unmatched, but our revolutionary raw bandwidth and user-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We will empower the buzzword "B2B, best-of-breed". We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our vertical robust, customer-defined TQM metrics but our capability to expedite. Without infrastructures, you will lack all-hands meetings. men-in-white practically invented the term "iteration". We have proven we know that if you scale efficiently then you may also synthesize intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Your budget for embracing should be at least three times your budget for synergizing. We will revalue our capacity to enable without devaluing our power to implement. We will add to our aptitude to evolve without reducing our capability to e-enable. The aptitude to whiteboard mega-ultra-virtually leads to the ability to mesh wirelessly. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. We will amplify our capacity to utilize without diminishing our aptitude to innovate. Think plug-and-play. Think front-end. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. What does the term "user-defined, scalable research and development" really mean? Have you ever had to exploit your sticky feature set? With a single click? The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. The capability to engineer iteravely leads to the power to transition globally. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be subscriber-defined? The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not killer. The ability to generate efficiently leads to the ability to engineer virally. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! A company that can grow faithfully will (one day) be able to leverage correctly. Without adequate platforms, macro-vertical convergence are forced to become compelling, mission-critical. We usually monetize end-to-end M&A. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is!