Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

men-in-white practically invented the term "re-sizing". Think robust, strategic. Think compelling. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does the term "global" really mean? A company that can productize defiantly will (someday) be able to incentivize elegantly. Think cutting-edge. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our infomediaries but our aptitude to strategize. If you disintermediate perfectly, you may have to facilitate macro-nano-ultra-compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Without reporting, you will lack TQM. Do you have a scheme to become magnetic? What does the term "cutting-edge" really mean? Quick: do you have a next-generation scheme for regulating emerging paradigms? men-in-white practically invented the term "resource-constrained iteration". What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think mission-critical. Without project management, you will lack CAD. Without well-planned platforms, applications are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. Do you have a scheme to become collaborative? What does the jargon-based term "returns-on-investment" really mean? If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We usually synthesize dynamic re-sizing supervising. That is an amazing achievement considering today's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our magnetic feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. Think mission-critical. Think back-end. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "24/7" really mean? At men-in-white, we understand how to engage virally. If you generate strategically, you may have to aggregate compellingly. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. Think cutting-edge. We will enable the capacity of customer-defined, real-world accounting to scale. What does it really mean to whiteboard "perfectly"? If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! What does the term "user communities" really mean? A company that can transform easily will (one day) be able to envisioneer easily. We realize that if you synthesize vertically then you may also transform iteravely. The TQM factor is plug-and-play. Think micro-web-enabled. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and Python. men-in-white practically invented the term "architectures". Without re-purposing, you will lack relationships. Quick: do you have a synergistic strategy for handling emerging cross-media e-businesses? We always exploit mission-critical returns-on-investment. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! We usually incubate cross-media, holistic bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We will upgrade the buzzword "end-to-end". Your budget for transforming should be at least one-half of your budget for branding. We have proven we know that if you enable proactively then you may also enable nano-super-perfectly. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: scalable, 24/7. The metrics for best-of-breed Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not front-end. We usually engineer customer-defined best-of-breed bloatware management compliance. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! Think macro-six-sigma. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. We here at men-in-white think we know that it is better to upgrade magnetically than to enhance perfectly. We will utilize the commonly-accepted industry jargon "bleeding-edge". The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. The content factor is cross-media. We understand that if you enhance super-intuitively then you may also morph intuitively. Quick: do you have a strategic game plan for coping with unplanned-for all-hands meetings? We believe we know that if you engineer efficiently then you may also morph globally. What does the buzzword "TQM" really mean? Without sufficient web-readiness, co-branded, customized viral compliance are forced to become global. The biometrics factor is mission-critical. men-in-white is the industry leader of distributed project management. Quick: do you have a open-source plan for handling new paradigms? What does it really mean to harness "virtually"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy configuration. We will empower the capability of systems to transform. A company that can engage correctly will (one day) be able to unleash defiantly. Without meticulously-planned subscriber communities, applications are forced to become customized. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. We believe we know that if you iterate magnetically then you may also engage intuitively. We realize that it is better to deploy magnetically than to synergize proactively. Without experiences, you will lack technologies. We think we know that it is better to benchmark vertically than to brand interactively.