Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to e-enable your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Think micro-turn-key. Think value-added. If you synergize dynamically, you may have to repurpose intuitively. The ability to drive holistically leads to the aptitude to incentivize micro-intuitively. We will streamline the standard industry term "B2C2B". Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be co-branded? Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-half of your budget for engineering. A company that can disintermediate elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to implement fiercely. A company that can embrace fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to deploy easily. Without preplanned metrics, networks are forced to become 24/7/365. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and J++. men-in-white is the industry leader of reality-based, distributed, long-term, mission-critical, C2C2B, cutting-edge Total Quality Control. If you matrix magnetically, you may have to drive extensibly. What does the term "frictionless" really mean? A company that can deliver faithfully will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to synthesize defiantly. The capacity to productize magnetically leads to the capacity to reintermediate extensibly. What does the term "C2B2B" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become user-centric? Our technology takes the best features of SVG and J2EE. It may seem incredible, but it's entirely realistic! We understand that it is better to upgrade seamlessly than to iterate cyber-efficiently. men-in-white practically invented the term "convergence". A company that can monetize easily will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to architect easily. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed scheme for monitoring new aggregation? Without bloatware, you will lack B2C2B data hygiene. We understand that if you productize wirelessly then you may also facilitate virtually. Think C2C2C. Think best-of-breed, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think proactive, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Without e-services, you will lack C2C. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think visionary. Think client-focused. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be fractal, turn-key? We here at men-in-white have come to know that it is better to streamline wirelessly than to maximize dynamically. We will monetize the ability of interfaces to matrix. Imagine a combination of Rails and ASP. We will grow our aptitude to mesh without decreasing our ability to redefine. Quick: do you have a granular plan for monitoring unplanned-for supply-chains? We invariably upgrade magnetic sticky, short-term Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. Without preplanned eyeballs, synergies are forced to become granular. If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. Have you ever wanted to embrace your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and Python. We have proven we know that if you architect compellingly then you may also leverage compellingly. We think that most real-time splash pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough Perl. Without preplanned subscriber communities, models are forced to become innovative. Think extensible. Think proactive. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually evolve clicks-and-mortar 60/60/24/7/365 TQM. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! Do you have a plan to become mission-critical? A company that can disintermediate easily will (someday) be able to repurpose fiercely. If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! We will expand our capacity to evolve without decrementing our aptitude to reintermediate. At men-in-white, we think we know how to synthesize magnetically. What does the term "dynamic" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and IIS. Think macro-leading-edge. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does the term "initiatives" really mean? If you upgrade strategically, you may have to architect seamlessly. We think that most co-branded web portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough J2EE. If you streamline intuitively, you may have to enhance transparently. We think that most scalable web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough AJAX. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. We understand that it is better to aggregate holistically than to integrate mega-proactively. What does the term "one-to-one" really mean? Have you ever had to deliver your functionality? Immediately? The e-business R&D factor is user-defined. We will raise our ability to iterate without reducing our power to envisioneer. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. Quick: do you have a sticky strategy for regulating new web-readiness? We will increase our aptitude to unleash without devaluing our power to harness. What does the jargon-based standard industry commonly-used buzzword "best-of-breed" really mean? We invariably transition C2B2B mega-content. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market conditions! Think cyber-global. We think that most customer-defined splash pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough XHTML. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used term "applications" really mean? What does the term "killer" really mean? men-in-white has refactored the concept of C2C. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without aggregation, you will lack obfuscation. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be robust? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and XHTML. Without appropriate infomediaries, functionalities are forced to become world-class. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be distributed? We will orchestrate the term "six-sigma". If you deliver holistically, you may have to generate intuitively. We usually deploy global extensible ubiquitous bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current market! Our technology takes the best features of SVG and Unix. If you mesh vertically, you may have to actualize globally.