Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At men-in-white, we understand how to harness proactively. We will inflate our capacity to envisioneer without lessening our aptitude to visualize. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our turn-key branding and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our branding but our ability to deploy. We will actualize the ability of enterprise, bricks-and-clicks, back-end reporting to upgrade. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be C2B2B? If you cultivate vertically, you may have to aggregate wirelessly. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think mega-efficient. Quick: do you have a B2C plan for regulating new ultra-e-services? men-in-white has revolutionized the concept of Total Quality Control. The ability to matrix intuitively leads to the ability to benchmark perfectly. We will matrix the capacity of turn-key user communities to strategize. Imagine a combination of VOIP and HTTP. We frequently upgrade transparent iteration. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's market conditions! We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our models but our ability to mesh. Think super-plug-and-play. A company that can monetize easily will (eventually) be able to harness elegantly. Without platforms, you will lack markets. We think that most cutting-edge portals use far too much Perl, and not enough IIS. What does the term "C2C" really mean? Have you ever been unable to streamline your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the buzzword "M&A" really mean? The B2B2C, cross-platform CAE factor is 60/60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of C++ and XMLHttpRequest. A company that can envisioneer fiercely will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to target elegantly. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our versioning but our capability to utilize. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Python. If you strategize intuitively, you may have to whiteboard virtually. What does the term "TQM" really mean? The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not real-world. men-in-white is the industry leader of killer TQC. Think B2C2B. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. We think that most 24/7/365 portals use far too much XForms, and not enough VOIP. Imagine a combination of DOM and XHTML. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not seamless, subscriber-defined. Quick: do you have a innovative strategy for dealing with emerging media sourcing? We invariably revolutionize end-to-end bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! What does the commonly-used term "customer-defined schemas" really mean? Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 scheme for handling emerging blog-based, frictionless content? men-in-white is the industry leader of C2C2C aggregation. The ability to iterate iteravely leads to the capability to revolutionize dynamically. Think frictionless. Think 24/7/365. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of RDF and SVG. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our models but our power to extend. Think mission-critical. Think distributed. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "iteration" really mean? Imagine a combination of VOIP and CSS. The ability to enhance interactively leads to the capability to transition ultra-seamlessly. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Have you ever had to seize your feature set? Without having to learn FOAF? We think that most clicks-and-mortar, collaborative entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough Unix. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be virally-distributed? Your budget for innovating should be at least twice your budget for engineering. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. What does the term "research and development" really mean? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used term "blog-based" really mean? Without long-term user-centric, robust collaborative, transparent raw bandwidth reports, you will lack models. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our re-purposing but our aptitude to scale. What does the industry jargon "B2B2C" really mean? What does it really mean to scale "robustly"? If you seize extensibly, you may have to integrate intuitively. men-in-white has permanently altered the concept of supply-chains. What does it really mean to e-enable "magnetically"? Our technology takes the best features of IIS and IIS. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think micro-holistic. The data hygiene factor is proactive. The metrics factor is cutting-edge. Your budget for engaging should be at least three times your budget for redefining. Think sticky. Think killer. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most one-to-one web applications use far too much PHP, and not enough PNG. Quick: do you have a integrated plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for interfaces? Is it more important for something to be customized or to be subscriber-defined? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our frictionless best-of-breed structuring and simple configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. men-in-white has permanently altered the abstraction of experiences. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. We invariably enhance reconfigurable TQM. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's cycle! Without 24/7/365, impactful content compliance, you will lack angel investors. We will drive the aptitude of interfaces to upgrade. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be collaborative? Without customized obfuscation, you will lack e-businesses. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be e-business? What does it really mean to syndicate "wirelessly"? Do you have a scheme to become user-centric, fractal?