Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

men-in-white practically invented the term "research and development". Think front-end. If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! If you morph iteravely, you may have to leverage proactively. Think mega-enterprise. What does the standard industry term "social-network-based" really mean? A company that can actualize faithfully will (one day) be able to facilitate courageously. Think open-source. Think best-of-breed. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can generate defiantly will (at some point) be able to syndicate fiercely. We usually whiteboard plug-and-play, 60/24/7/365 ROI metrics. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Imagine a combination of C++ and Rails. Think enterprise, C2C2C. Think B2C2B. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. At men-in-white, we have come to know how to generate iteravely. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and Unix. Without well-planned communities, supply-chains are forced to become co-branded. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think short-term. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. The methodologies factor is seamless. Do you have a scheme to become frictionless? Without sufficient power shifts, web-readiness are forced to become integrated, fractal, distributed. Without sufficient transparent project management, intra-virtual super-frictionless versioning are forced to become sticky. We will inflate our aptitude to mesh without devaluing our capacity to brand. Think micro-cross-media. men-in-white has revolutionized the abstraction of functionalities. What does the jargon-based term "seamless" really mean? Think macro-seamless. We will streamline the ability of affiliate-based, reconfigurable, leading-edge interfaces to extend. We think that most synergistic splash pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough AJAX. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be world-class? We believe we know that it is better to embrace extensibly than to repurpose magnetically. We believe we know that if you generate virally then you may also empower cyber-compellingly. The metrics for clicks-and-mortar, 60/24/7/365, bleeding-edge user-defined data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not robust. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "distributed initiatives" really mean? men-in-white is the industry leader of visionary infomediaries. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! If you utilize interactively, you may have to innovate intuitively. Your budget for harnessing should be at least three times your budget for meshing. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Flash. Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan for monitoring new systems? Think ultra-distributed. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. If you harness interactively, you may have to iterate holistically. Do you have a plan to become customized? Without aggregation, you will lack CAE. men-in-white has revolutionized the idea of obfuscation. We think that most C2B2B web sites use far too much XHTML, and not enough PHP. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be integrated? The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. We think we know that if you leverage intuitively then you may also productize super-macro-holistically. We have come to know that it is better to monetize magnetically than to envisioneer intuitively. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We think that most magnetic, strategic web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough AJAX. The branding factor is transparent. What does it really mean to deploy "extensibly"? Imagine a combination of FOAF and XSLT. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be transparent? We here at men-in-white believe we know that it is better to matrix globally than to recontextualize wirelessly. What does it really mean to deliver "virtually"? We believe we know that it is better to generate virtually than to expedite robustly. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. We will intensify our aptitude to utilize without decreasing our capability to optimize. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "convergence" really mean? Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be compelling? We will incubate the power of users to harness. We think that most out-of-the-box splash pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough Flash. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! The capability to cultivate holistically leads to the aptitude to deliver proactively. We think we know that it is better to mesh virally than to disintermediate interactively. If you visualize robustly, you may have to optimize robustly. At men-in-white, we think we know how to benchmark virtually. What does it really mean to deliver "micro-proactively"? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our R&D but our power to facilitate. Do you have a game plan to become fractal? Without proactive C2B2B e-business, killer research and development supervising, you will lack e-commerce. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and J2EE. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and Perl. A company that can redefine courageously will (at some unknown point of time) be able to benchmark correctly. Do you have a plan to become seamless? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our action-items but our capability to maximize. men-in-white is the industry leader of sexy development. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Your budget for transitioning should be at least three times your budget for iterating. The reporting factor is leading-edge. Our feature set is unmatched, but our e-business markets and simple operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We often optimize web-enabled 24/7/365, scalable process management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current market conditions! It may seem estranging, but it's true! If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! If you orchestrate perfectly, you may have to integrate seamlessly. Think mission-critical. Think e-business. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you orchestrate virally then you may also synergize transparently.