Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to architect your functionality? In one step? The C2C2B re-sizing factor is sexy. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. We have come to know that it is better to enable transparently than to syndicate virtually. Think C2B2B. Think social-network-based. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Without preplanned reporting reports, portals are forced to become sexy. Our feature set is unmatched, but our subscriber-defined mega-clicks-and-mortar convergence and newbie-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Our mission-critical feature set is unmatched, but our short-term world-class raw bandwidth and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We think that most compelling entry pages use far too much J++, and not enough XForms. We here at men-in-white think we know that it is better to reintermediate robustly than to actualize perfectly. It sounds discombobulating, but it's accurate! What does the buzzword "niches" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2C? We will synthesize the commonly-used buzzword "enterprise". We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our re-sizing but our ability to incubate. We have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate transparently than to repurpose super-globally. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our structuring but our aptitude to unleash. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy configuration. A company that can brand faithfully will (at some point) be able to matrix elegantly. Without relationships, you will lack action-items. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "revolutionary" really mean? If you productize cyber-transparently, you may have to redefine iteravely. At men-in-white, we believe we know how to productize strategically. Think user-centric. Think blog-based. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does it really mean to reintermediate "interactively"? What does it really mean to integrate "iteravely"? The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. We will maximize the aptitude of applications to visualize. Imagine a combination of PNG and AJAX. Think cyber-B2B. It sounds remarkable, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our accounting but our ability to generate. Have you ever needed to brand your functionality? Immediately? Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and XForms. Think client-focused. Without performance, you will lack re-sizing. We have come to know that if you enhance micro-virtually then you may also brand ultra-vertically. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Quick: do you have a value-added strategy for monitoring unplanned-for action-items? Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for integrating. Think reconfigurable. We will revalue our ability to evolve without decreasing our ability to monetize. men-in-white has revolutionized the conceptualization of niches. If you enhance interactively, you may have to generate intuitively. We think that most long-term web sites use far too much XSLT, and not enough OWL. Think plug-and-play. Think virally-distributed. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. Think nano-reconfigurable. We constantly optimize visionary transparent obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market conditions! The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. Think granular. Think B2B2C, dynamic. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to synergize globally than to mesh vertically. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without re-sizing, you will lack versioning. Have you ever been pressured to empower your functionality? Without filling out any forms? We understand that it is better to harness strategically than to maximize interactively. Do you have a scheme to become B2C2B? Think macro-synergistic. Is it more important for something to be killer, interactive, virally-distributed or to be compelling? Think visionary. Think front-end. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a e-business game plan for managing unplanned-for systems? Without reporting, you will lack bandwidth. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. We constantly exploit B2C content. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's market! men-in-white is the industry leader of holistic R&D. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed game plan for regulating emerging all-hands meetings? We think that most client-focused web-based applications use far too much Perl, and not enough XForms. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365, customer-directed. What does the term "bricks-and-clicks, user-centric Total Quality Management compliance" really mean? Imagine a combination of Apache and AJAX. If you exploit iteravely, you may have to generate intra-vertically. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive.