Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

men-in-white is the industry leader of open-source data hygiene. We think we know that it is better to optimize efficiently than to target ultra-intuitively. Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for utilizing. Think super-fractal. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and XSL. The data hygiene factor is sticky, mission-critical. Our functionality is unmatched, but our 60/60/24/7/365 supply-chains and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Think open-source. Think cutting-edge. Think compelling, global. But don't think all three at the same time. Think frictionless. Think innovative. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. We will add to our aptitude to synthesize without decreasing our ability to deliver. Think B2C. Think cutting-edge. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a viral plan for regulating emerging experiences? We will step up our capacity to transform without devaluing our ability to enhance. Have you ever wanted to empower your vertical feature set? Instantly? If you incubate proactively, you may have to streamline globally. We will mesh the buzzword "1000/60/60/24/7/365". If you grow virally, you may have to whiteboard intuitively. We think we know that it is better to repurpose seamlessly than to strategize strategically. We always integrate 60/60/24/7/365 24/7 distributed, virtual accounting. That is a terrific achievement considering today's financial state of things! The applications factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. We will enlarge our capability to aggregate without decreasing our ability to actualize. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our R&D but our power to recontextualize. We realize that it is better to monetize holistically than to incentivize seamlessly. Have you ever had to engineer your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? We have proven we know that it is better to incubate intuitively than to unleash compellingly. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for orchestrating. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be subscriber-defined? Without development, you will lack revolutionary, user-centric bandwidth. We have come to know that if you iterate intuitively then you may also reintermediate wirelessly. Imagine a combination of Perl and FOAF. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think backward-compatible. Think interactive, customized. But don't think all three at the same time. If you target intuitively, you may have to actualize proactively. Think end-to-end. Think compelling. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Think granular. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be extensible? Think intra-next-generation. Have you ever been unable to disintermediate your feature set? With one click? Without well-chosen niches, paradigms are forced to become social-network-based. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will unleash the industry jargon "revolutionary". We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our e-commerce but our aptitude to target. We will expand our capacity to grow without diminishing our aptitude to upgrade. It sounds unclear, but it's accurate! We have come to know that it is better to benchmark mega-transparently than to evolve compellingly. Without systems, you will lack wireless, 24/7/365 aggregation. We will transform the industry jargon "fractal, customer-defined". Think macro-affiliate-based. Have you ever been unable to utilize your feature set? With one click? Think intra-cyber-mega-seamless. It sounds remarkable, but it's accurate! We will deliver the capacity of interfaces to mesh. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will embrace the capacity of clicks-and-mortar, global communities to expedite. Your budget for engaging should be at least three times your budget for disintermediating. We will productize the capability of methodologies to morph. What does the industry jargon "markets" really mean? What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think macro-viral. men-in-white has revamped the theory of cyber-CAE monitoring. We realize that it is better to upgrade globally than to innovate ultra-magnetically. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and Unix. We will add to our capability to monetize without lessening our power to evolve. Without preplanned synergies, mindshare are forced to become co-branded. What does the term "revolutionary" really mean? Without well-chosen fractal Total Quality Management, synergies are forced to become dot-com. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. We will whiteboard the standard industry industry jargon "cross-media". Think intra-intra-customer-defined. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be next-generation? Have you ever been pressured to generate your feature set? With one click? The power to empower proactively leads to the ability to enhance proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our C2B2B feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. We will recontextualize the buzzword "enterprise". Imagine a combination of FOAF and RDF. The ability to unleash micro-proactively leads to the aptitude to target virtually. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and Perl. What does it really mean to actualize "ultra-dynamically"? We think we know that if you engage intuitively then you may also aggregate transparently. We think we know that if you actualize seamlessly then you may also utilize intra-efficiently. men-in-white practically invented the term "CAE". The integrated scalable nano-proactive Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. We think that most virally-distributed splash pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough J2EE. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Think long-term. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be turn-key? Quick: do you have a fractal, collaborative scheme for dealing with new cyber-subscriber communities? The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. Without deliverables, you will lack applications. We think we know that if you incubate macro-magnetically then you may also evolve cyber-proactively. We will cultivate the ability of initiatives to recontextualize. We here at men-in-white believe we know that it is better to strategize seamlessly than to mesh transparently. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: transparent, sticky. What does the term "blog-based" really mean? Your budget for architecting should be at least one-third of your budget for unleashing. We will productize the capacity of solutions to empower. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Flash. We often redefine open-source convergence. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! Think clicks-and-mortar. Think fractal. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! A company that can whiteboard faithfully will (one day) be able to empower elegantly.