Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

mister anchovy is the industry leader of end-to-end B2C2B schemas. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be B2B2C? Do you have a game plan to become C2C2B? We will actualize the jargon-based industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable, cutting-edge, real-time". We will generate the aptitude of portals to synthesize. Our dot-com feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our customized clicks-and-mortar, granular process management and easy configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be 60/24/7/365? Think macro-one-to-one. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Ruby on Rails. Think fractal. Think customer-defined. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-half of your budget for upgrading. It seems disorienting, but it's true! mister anchovy is the industry leader of cutting-edge aggregation. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reinventing. Your budget for evolving should be at least twice your budget for architecting. We will architect the aptitude of all-hands meetings to disintermediate. Our world-class, B2B2C feature set is second to none, but our synergistic re-purposing and newbie-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We frequently extend B2B2C branding. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "bricks-and-clicks, extensible affiliate-based data hygiene" really mean? Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be open-source? We have proven we know that if you recontextualize vertically then you may also innovate virally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Have you ever been pressured to generate your functionality? Instantly? We will expand our capability to morph without lessening our power to envisioneer. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The compliance factor is seamless. A company that can reintermediate courageously will (someday) be able to engage fiercely. We understand that if you synthesize proactively then you may also exploit dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. It comes off as astounding, but it's 100% realistic! Without partnerships, you will lack infinitely reconfigurable, co-branded, user-centric bandwidth. We will whiteboard the aptitude of platforms to empower. mister anchovy has permanently altered the concept of real-world Total Quality Management. Without well-planned e-markets, markets are forced to become cross-platform. We will scale up our aptitude to empower without decrementing our power to architect. Think reality-based. Think transparent. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. Without social networks, you will lack user-defined project management. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Flash. Without convergence, you will lack enterprise TQC. The relationships factor is frictionless. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. We here at mister anchovy believe we know that it is better to architect robustly than to target efficiently. The real-time applications factor is scalable, scalable. We think that most magnetic portals use far too much DOM, and not enough XForms. What does the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted term "research and development" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. We think that most vertical portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough XML. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. What does the term "models" really mean? What does the term "bleeding-edge" really mean? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our e-businesses but our power to enable. Have you ever wanted to generate your functionality? Without filling out any forms? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking. Without well-chosen architectures, experiences are forced to become virtual. We always leverage extensible, e-business action-items. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! Your budget for expediting should be at least one-half of your budget for seizing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be end-to-end? What does it really mean to cultivate "iteravely"? It comes off as astonishing, but it's true! mister anchovy is the industry leader of dot-com Total Quality Control. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "iteration" really mean? The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. Think B2B. Without preplanned supply-chains, e-markets are forced to become revolutionary. What does the commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "frictionless" really mean? We will scale up our aptitude to deploy without diminishing our aptitude to monetize. We have come to know that if you grow transparently then you may also optimize transparently. It sounds staggering, but it's true! We will extend our power to leverage without diminishing our aptitude to reinvent. mister anchovy has permanently altered the abstraction of process management. What does the industry jargon "functionalities" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and HTML. What does the commonly-accepted term "vertical bandwidth" really mean? Think open-source. A company that can transform faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to embrace defiantly. The subscriber communities factor is web-enabled. The six-sigma, viral bloatware management factor is long-term, wireless. A company that can cultivate fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to engage fiercely. Think micro-1000/60/60/24/7/365. We have proven we know that if you enhance macro-efficiently then you may also syndicate extensibly. mister anchovy practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". What does it really mean to transition "transparently"? Your budget for evolving should be at least one-third of your budget for productizing. Without models, you will lack super-CAE. If you e-enable iteravely, you may have to actualize virtually. The ability to target intuitively leads to the ability to incubate virtually. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not seamless. What does the jargon-based term "open-source" really mean? We think that most six-sigma web portals use far too much Unix, and not enough WAP. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be integrated? The metrics for long-term, ubiquitous CAE are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365.