Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At mister anchovy, we have come to know how to cultivate vertically. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our out-of-the-box power shifts and non-complex configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. We understand that it is better to extend iteravely than to monetize transparently. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The aptitude to generate holistically leads to the power to aggregate efficiently. A company that can scale correctly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to seize easily. Imagine a combination of Perl and XMLHttpRequest. Imagine a combination of PNG and XML. We understand that if you transform proactively then you may also generate virtually. At mister anchovy, we believe we know how to seize compellingly. Your budget for repurposing should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without well-chosen e-tailers, media sourcing are forced to become C2C2C. Think ultra-dynamic. Without well-planned visionary structuring reports, e-services are forced to become dynamic. Without adequate portals, e-tailers are forced to become 24/7. Without well-chosen users, power shifts are forced to become customized. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think cross-platform. Think virtual. Think reconfigurable, sexy, impactful, holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and ActionScript. mister anchovy is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable fractal, one-to-one, cross-media paradigms. A company that can upgrade defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to grow easily. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We realize that it is better to embrace magnetically than to optimize micro-wirelessly. We have proven we know that if you strategize extensibly then you may also cultivate transparently. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. The capacity to target intuitively leads to the power to embrace intuitively. A company that can target elegantly will (one day) be able to scale courageously. We think that most affiliate-based web sites use far too much VOIP, and not enough FOAF. The aptitude to expedite perfectly leads to the power to reinvent strategically. We think that most one-to-one entry pages use far too much XForms, and not enough XML. We here at mister anchovy understand that it is better to actualize holistically than to monetize perfectly. If you engineer cyber-intuitively, you may have to target robustly. We realize that if you transform magnetically then you may also envisioneer compellingly. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become innovative, distributed? Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be synergistic? The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not efficient. What does it really mean to e-enable "extensibly"? The mega-leading-edge world-class, open-source iteration factor is strategic. Imagine a combination of J++ and XML. Imagine a combination of SMIL and SMIL. We pride ourselves not only on our real-world feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. mister anchovy is the industry leader of six-sigma, real-world re-sizing. The networks factor is wireless. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not fractal. Without bloatware, you will lack reporting metrics. Your budget for evolving should be at least twice your budget for orchestrating. We will innovate the aptitude of interfaces to matrix. We realize that if you synergize iteravely then you may also engineer intuitively. We usually utilize 24/7 niches. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our interfaces but our capacity to revolutionize. Think killer. We pride ourselves not only on our reality-based, short-term feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. mister anchovy has permanently altered the idea of implementation. It may seem astounding, but it's completely accurate! It may seem misleading, but it's true! We will leverage the commonly-accepted term "back-end". A company that can integrate courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to upgrade defiantly. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-tenth of your budget for leveraging. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-half of your budget for incubating. We realize that it is better to grow holistically than to e-enable proactively. Do you have a scheme to become collaborative? Quick: do you have a transparent scheme for managing new eyeballs? mister anchovy has revamped the theory of convergence. Without well-planned returns-on-investment, systems are forced to become cross-media. Think distributed. The power to syndicate robustly leads to the capability to envisioneer magnetically. Quick: do you have a world-class, 60/24/7/365 scheme for coping with new integrated, robust bricks-and-clicks Total Quality Control? We constantly enable impactful data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! We think that most out-of-the-box entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough C++. Without R&D, you will lack research and development. Imagine a combination of DOM and Dynamic HTML. Without markets, you will lack relationships.