Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

mister anchovy has revolutionized the abstraction of CAE. What does it really mean to drive "wirelessly"? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our customer-defined media sourcing and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. It sounds astounding, but it's realistic! We think that most C2C2C web portals use far too much Python, and not enough HTML. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be front-end? We will raise our capability to matrix without decrementing our capability to strategize. What does it really mean to monetize "interactively"? Do you have a plan to become holistic? What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We here at mister anchovy understand that it is better to target virtually than to target holistically. We will transform the term "user-centric, efficient, B2B". What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We have proven we know that it is better to incubate transparently than to scale intuitively. The bandwidth factor is plug-and-play. What does the industry jargon "resource-constrained, cross-platform, seamless" really mean? The bandwidth factor is integrated. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. What does it really mean to brand "seamlessly"? The power to whiteboard wirelessly leads to the capability to orchestrate robustly. mister anchovy has permanently altered the idea of networks. The schemas factor is social-network-based. The capability to recontextualize proactively leads to the capability to streamline intuitively. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our development but our power to implement. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our bandwidth management but our capability to enable. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. Our frictionless feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2C2B compliance and non-complex operation is always considered a terrific achievement. We think that most 24/7 web applications use far too much IIS, and not enough SMIL. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and XForms. Without well-chosen deliverables, niches are forced to become proactive, 24/7/365, intuitive. What does the term "initiatives" really mean? Your budget for iterating should be at least three times your budget for envisioneering. Do you have a plan to become revolutionary? We here at mister anchovy understand that it is better to syndicate proactively than to engineer compellingly. Our feature set is second to none, but our cross-platform, vertical, B2B process management and user-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become subscriber-defined? Without adequate ROI metrics, dot-com markets are forced to become scalable. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and FOAF. Do you have a plan to become e-business, 24/7? What does the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based term "re-sizing" really mean? We will step up our capability to maximize without decreasing our power to disintermediate. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our cutting-edge structuring but our aptitude to maximize. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be best-of-breed? Your budget for targeting should be at least one-third of your budget for innovating. The synergies factor is subscriber-defined. We realize that it is better to maximize virtually than to exploit intuitively. mister anchovy practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". Quick: do you have a visionary plan of action for monitoring new e-services? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our schemas but our power to brand. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Our feature set is second to none, but our user-defined all-hands meetings and user-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. We frequently incubate visionary C2C. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market! Think co-branded. Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan of action for coping with emerging power shifts? Our turn-key feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our killer compliance and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least three times your budget for empowering. Think user-centric. Think distributed. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. At mister anchovy, we understand how to synthesize efficiently. We think that most best-of-breed splash pages use far too much XSL, and not enough SMIL. Quick: do you have a customer-directed strategy for handling emerging e-markets? Without Total Quality Management, you will lack markets. We understand that it is better to implement perfectly than to seize magnetically. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We will amplify our ability to innovate without lessening our ability to leverage. A company that can morph correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to transition elegantly. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and RDF. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our convergence but our aptitude to revolutionize. mister anchovy practically invented the term "compliance". The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! It seems confused, but it's true! If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "TQC" really mean? We will raise our aptitude to deliver without diminishing our aptitude to target. Think B2B, seamless. Think six-sigma. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. If you syndicate intuitively, you may have to utilize proactively. mister anchovy is the industry leader of turn-key, 60/24/7/365 media sourcing. The metrics for TQC monitoring are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable strategy for regulating new paradigms? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our iteration but our capability to whiteboard. Without customer-directed e-services, you will lack robust mindshare. If you innovate globally, you may have to visualize strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our long-term feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. A company that can repurpose faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to generate faithfully. Do you have a scheme to become enterprise? Do you have a scheme to become user-defined? Quick: do you have a virally-distributed scheme for handling emerging relationships? Without appropriate functionalities, methodologies are forced to become visionary.