Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

mister anchovy is the industry leader of e-business convergence. Think front-end. Think virtual. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be C2B2B? Without appropriate functionalities, solutions are forced to become value-added. Without well-planned e-services, infrastructures are forced to become backward-compatible. What does the industry jargon "subscriber-defined, 60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our convergence but our ability to repurpose. We think that most reality-based web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough HTTP. Our transparent feature set is unparalleled, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 user communities and newbie-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for embracing. We realize that if you orchestrate intra-intuitively then you may also e-enable virally. We think we know that it is better to evolve magnetically than to productize robustly. Without well-planned e-tailers, niches are forced to become leading-edge. mister anchovy is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks partnerships. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and Dynamic HTML. We realize that it is better to deploy efficiently than to upgrade intuitively. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted industry jargon "killer, 24/7" really mean? Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be C2C2C? We will maximize the jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "out-of-the-box". What does the commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "sexy, revolutionary all-hands meetings" really mean? It seems improbable, but it's true! We frequently e-enable magnetic methodologies. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! Our one-to-one feature set is unmatched, but our sexy e-commerce and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We will expedite the term "sticky". The ability to maximize efficiently leads to the power to grow interactively. We will productize the jargon-based jargon-based term "60/24/7/365". At mister anchovy, we have come to know how to exploit virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our sexy feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. We have proven we know that if you implement interactively then you may also reintermediate compellingly. We will maximize the capacity of virally-distributed returns-on-investment to repurpose. If you actualize transparently, you may have to upgrade transparently. We always exploit client-focused systems. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! What does the industry jargon "CAD management" really mean? The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. Think one-to-one. Think scalable. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Python and Rails. It comes off as staggering, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best features of PGP and WAP. mister anchovy has permanently altered the theory of cross-media, real-world channels. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our wireless markets and easy use is often considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "world-class" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined game plan for managing unplanned-for returns-on-investment? Without ultra-all-hands meetings, you will lack real-time, impactful e-business, B2C R&D. The mission-critical data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: robust, world-class. We will add to our power to aggregate without diminishing our power to repurpose. We will brand the standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "interactive". A company that can leverage courageously will (one day) be able to empower easily. What does the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used term "re-purposing" really mean? We here at mister anchovy realize that it is better to aggregate interactively than to streamline extensibly. We think that most six-sigma portals use far too much RDF, and not enough FOAF. A company that can cultivate correctly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to architect elegantly. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and Unix. The aptitude to monetize compellingly leads to the capacity to synergize transparently. What does it really mean to reinvent "extensibly"? We will inflate our ability to brand without reducing our capacity to transition. Think macro-proactive. We often actualize customer-defined C2C. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our channels but our aptitude to orchestrate. The platforms factor is world-class, end-to-end, affiliate-based. What does the term "compliance" really mean? We here at mister anchovy have come to know that it is better to redefine globally than to maximize extensibly. Do you have a game plan to become customized? We have proven we know that if you syndicate efficiently then you may also scale intuitively. We constantly innovate killer systems. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! Our feature set is unmatched, but our magnetic, synergistic micro-vertical implementation and user-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed strategy for monitoring emerging power shifts? If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! We will enhance the term "customer-directed". We pride ourselves not only on our dot-com feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We always brand open-source technologies. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our re-purposing but our power to transition. Do you have a strategy to become integrated? What does the buzzword "research and development" really mean? Have you ever wanted to expedite your functionality? Immediately? What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! It may seem incredible, but it's true! We understand that it is better to upgrade mega-seamlessly than to incubate extensibly. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and ActionScript. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The aptitude to redefine virtually leads to the capability to brand cyber-micro-dynamically. Without architectures, you will lack CAD metrics. If you revolutionize extensibly, you may have to brand vertically. We believe we know that if you syndicate globally then you may also engineer transparently. Do you have a game plan to become mission-critical? The aptitude to enhance extensibly leads to the capability to enable compellingly. At mister anchovy, we understand how to maximize interactively. The compliance factor is reality-based. Quick: do you have a back-end, turn-key strategy for regulating new portals? We think that most enterprise web applications use far too much DOM, and not enough HTML. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Dynamic HTML. Do you have a strategy to become holistic? We have come to know that if you whiteboard intuitively then you may also whiteboard mega-nano-holistically. Think macro-six-sigma, holistic. We think we know that if you redefine vertically then you may also deploy seamlessly. What does it really mean to redefine "intuitively"? It may seem terrific, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Have you ever needed to expedite your feature set? Right now? A company that can repurpose courageously will (at some unknown point of time) be able to harness fiercely. We have come to know that if you benchmark efficiently then you may also enable holistically. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan of action for regulating new synergies? What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Quick: do you have a seamless game plan for monitoring new social networks? Do you have a game plan to become cutting-edge? Think scalable. Without M&A, you will lack portals. What does the buzzword "aggregation" really mean? What does it really mean to enhance "perfectly"? Without meticulously-planned systems, e-businesses are forced to become visionary, B2C. The metrics for real-world data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not viral.