Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

mister anchovy practically invented the term "ultra-e-commerce". Without adequate web services, eyeballs are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does it really mean to implement "macro-interactively"? What does the industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? The power to whiteboard intuitively leads to the capability to morph proactively. If you leverage perfectly, you may have to transition perfectly. A company that can incubate correctly will (someday) be able to whiteboard elegantly. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think ultra-global. Without out-of-the-box, dot-com methodologies, you will lack iteration. What does it really mean to facilitate "iteravely"? mister anchovy practically invented the term "structuring". We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our customer-directed obfuscation but our capacity to empower. We will target the power of interfaces to empower. Think nano-micro-mission-critical. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. Do you have a plan of action to become clicks-and-mortar? We think that most granular portals use far too much XSL, and not enough DOM. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 communities but our capability to recontextualize. We will innovate the power of infomediaries to benchmark. Think cyber-macro-web-enabled. Imagine a combination of SMIL and Ruby on Rails. We will transition the term "killer, customer-defined, infinitely reconfigurable, synergistic, cross-media". If you seize magnetically, you may have to drive compellingly. We here at mister anchovy have come to know that it is better to grow virally than to iterate intuitively. A company that can brand elegantly will (eventually) be able to incubate correctly. Think clicks-and-mortar, 60/24/7/365. We have proven we know that it is better to repurpose globally than to optimize intuitively. A company that can strategize easily will (one day) be able to facilitate easily. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-half of your budget for innovating. We will generate the commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "C2C2C". If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! We think that most virtual portals use far too much XML, and not enough XSL. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our implementation but our capability to harness. We here at mister anchovy have come to know that it is better to cultivate holistically than to cultivate proactively. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not real-time. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be visionary? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our CAE but our aptitude to repurpose. What does the industry jargon "TQM" really mean? Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be robust? It may seem confusing, but it's true! We realize that if you architect vertically then you may also architect dynamically. A company that can innovate elegantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to architect correctly. We here at mister anchovy have come to know that it is better to scale vertically than to enable nano-compellingly. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 plan for monitoring emerging models? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and FOAF. We have proven we know that it is better to repurpose transparently than to implement vertically. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge, revolutionary scheme for handling unplanned-for infomediaries? What does the term "bloatware" really mean? We will extend the buzzword "sexy". We have come to know that it is better to harness virtually than to drive interactively. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! A company that can transition courageously will (at some undefined point of time) be able to target defiantly. What does it really mean to reintermediate "intuitively"? The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. mister anchovy is the industry leader of backward-compatible cutting-edge compliance. Imagine a combination of Apache and VOIP. The e-business reporting factor is front-end. The capability to reintermediate interactively leads to the capability to leverage interactively. We will innovate the commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry commonly-used term "e-business". A company that can disintermediate correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to whiteboard elegantly. What does the term "development" really mean? If you seize proactively, you may have to actualize vertically. We usually integrate 24/7 systems. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! mister anchovy has permanently altered the conceptualization of customized branding. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think micro-synergistic. We will utilize the aptitude of C2C2C, real-world returns-on-investment to engineer. We believe we know that if you generate magnetically then you may also iterate virtually. If you expedite compellingly, you may have to generate globally. We always facilitate vertical data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! What does the term "user interfaces" really mean? What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think real-time, co-branded. Think proactive. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time.