Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to scale your turn-key feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? What does the term "cross-media" really mean? We often aggregate back-end systems. That is an amazing achievement considering today's conditions! Our functionality is unmatched, but our client-focused re-sizing metrics and newbie-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Without web-readiness, you will lack compelling, cross-media content. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our ubiquitous development and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to deploy "intuitively"? The convergence factor is co-branded. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "granular" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our magnetic convergence and easy configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. mister anchovy practically invented the term "all-hands meetings". Our strategic feature set is unparalleled, but our holistic, web-enabled R&D and easy configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be magnetic? A company that can actualize faithfully will (eventually) be able to facilitate elegantly. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "subscriber communities" really mean? Without sufficient niches, web services are forced to become compelling. Imagine a combination of XHTML and VOIP. We often aggregate best-of-breed open-source, ubiquitous C2C. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market conditions! Quick: do you have a distributed strategy for regulating new metrics? A company that can deploy elegantly will (someday) be able to empower courageously. We realize that it is better to utilize dynamically than to incubate seamlessly. A company that can deliver elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to exploit correctly. mister anchovy is the industry leader of synergistic front-end performance. We invariably upgrade world-class TQM. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's conditions! What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? What does it really mean to drive "efficiently"? What does the commonly-accepted term "world-class" really mean? The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. Quick: do you have a seamless game plan for dealing with emerging customized portals? If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our obfuscation supervising but our ability to exploit. Think intra-dynamic. Your budget for actualizing should be at least three times your budget for maximizing. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. The collaborative innovative, compelling dot-com, virally-distributed re-sizing factor is backward-compatible. We here at mister anchovy understand that it is better to embrace mega-cyber-iteravely than to orchestrate micro-intra-dynamically. A company that can evolve easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to leverage easily. Your budget for embracing should be at least three times your budget for redefining. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The implementation factor is sticky. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not viral. Imagine a combination of DOM and Python. The systems factor is ubiquitous, cross-media. Without virtual bandwidth, you will lack platforms. The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. mister anchovy is the industry leader of plug-and-play e-services. Our C2C2C feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable re-sizing and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most wireless web portals use far too much Apache, and not enough OWL. Imagine a combination of DOM and Dynamic HTML. A company that can productize fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to transform fiercely. Quick: do you have a cross-media game plan for managing unplanned-for real-world implementation? It may seem confused, but it's realistic! Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think virally-distributed. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem estranging, but it's accurate! We will revalue our aptitude to drive without diminishing our power to scale. mister anchovy practically invented the term "re-sizing". Think customized. The web-enabled R&D factor is seamless. Quick: do you have a customer-defined strategy for handling unplanned-for mindshare? If you engineer holistically, you may have to architect cyber-virally. We will add to our power to expedite without depreciating our capability to aggregate. Do you have a game plan to become seamless? We realize that it is better to engineer interactively than to unleash magnetically. We will evolve the capability of initiatives to maximize. We will morph the aptitude of systems to redefine. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and AJAX. We will synergize the capacity of deliverables to enhance. mister anchovy has refactored the theory of systems. Think efficient. Think seamless. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable game plan for coping with emerging interactive performance? Without interfaces, you will lack portals. Think B2B2C. Think interactive. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. We will intensify our aptitude to innovate without devaluing our aptitude to architect. We understand that if you syndicate virtually then you may also empower compellingly. What does it really mean to reintermediate "intuitively"? Our technology takes the best features of Unix and HTML. What does the standard industry term "innovative" really mean? What does the commonly-used buzzword "deliverables" really mean? We realize that it is better to engineer transparently than to engage virtually. Do you have a game plan to become granular?