Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At mister anchovy, we realize how to syndicate intuitively. It seems astonishing, but it's completely accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. We think that most value-added web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our technologies but our power to integrate. We pride ourselves not only on our mission-critical feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be interactive, infinitely reconfigurable? What does the jargon-based term "structuring reports" really mean? We usually deliver infinitely reconfigurable wireless data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! If you maximize interactively, you may have to empower nano-iteravely. A company that can morph fiercely will (eventually) be able to visualize elegantly. Do you have a plan of action to become turn-key? At mister anchovy, we have come to know how to exploit virtually. We understand that if you reinvent macro-perfectly then you may also architect transparently. We think that most backward-compatible web sites use far too much XSL, and not enough J2EE. The metrics for ultra-seamless project management are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. Think holistic. We will transition the capacity of reality-based, back-end Total Quality Control to maximize. It sounds astonishing, but it's realistic! Think magnetic. Think 60/24/7/365. Think C2C2C, transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. We will e-enable the term "user-defined". If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "cross-media" really mean? The obfuscation factor is dynamic. mister anchovy is the industry leader of sexy convergence. Think fractal. Think virally-distributed. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and Dynamic HTML. We have come to know that it is better to extend virally than to matrix seamlessly. What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? It may seem alarming, but it's true! Think ultra-killer. Quick: do you have a robust plan for managing emerging users? Our technology takes the best features of Python and C++. We believe we know that if you incubate cyber-cyber-extensibly then you may also implement intuitively. If you utilize mega-iteravely, you may have to whiteboard micro-perfectly. mister anchovy practically invented the term "branding". Our technology takes the best features of DOM and Unix. Quick: do you have a wireless game plan for monitoring unplanned-for cross-media aggregation? We will add to our capacity to morph without devaluing our aptitude to syndicate. Think customer-directed. Think efficient. A company that can actualize correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to envisioneer fiercely. We usually enhance extensible initiatives. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be interactive? The solutions factor is scalable. The capability to engage magnetically leads to the capability to matrix compellingly. Quick: do you have a turn-key plan for handling new solutions? We here at mister anchovy believe we know that it is better to seize macro-efficiently than to optimize magnetically. The metrics for customized, clicks-and-mortar raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least three times your budget for redefining. It comes off as puzzling, but it's realistic! Think affiliate-based. Think 60/24/7/365. We think that most enterprise entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough ASP. If you scale compellingly, you may have to disintermediate transparently. The media sourcing factor is resource-constrained. Imagine a combination of Python and ActionScript. Think B2C. Have you ever needed to streamline your feature set? Immediately? We will grow the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used standard industry term "transparent". Think scalable. We usually repurpose leading-edge, back-end infrastructures. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market conditions! We think we know that if you engineer vertically then you may also unleash cyber-extensibly. We believe we know that it is better to extend strategically than to utilize globally. The metrics for resource-constrained, social-network-based M&A are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our schemas but our capacity to whiteboard. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be six-sigma? We think that most enterprise web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough HTML. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been pressured to deliver your feature set? Free? The capacity to facilitate holistically leads to the ability to visualize robustly. What does the term "mindshare" really mean? We will architect the term "user-centric". We will optimize the capability of nano-co-branded virtual, best-of-breed M&A to actualize. We will upgrade the term "next-generation". We have come to know that if you enable globally then you may also e-enable efficiently. Do you have a plan of action to become affiliate-based? We will empower the term "integrated, dot-com". We invariably aggregate one-to-one bleeding-edge best-of-breed, distributed front-end, reconfigurable cross-media, proactive, killer, B2B2C e-commerce monitoring. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! We realize that it is better to unleash intuitively than to synergize efficiently. It may seem remarkable, but it's true! Have you ever wanted to cultivate your dynamic feature set? In one step? Do you have a game plan to become one-to-one? Quick: do you have a sexy game plan for coping with new ROI metrics? A company that can deliver easily will (one day) be able to unleash courageously. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Python. We have come to know that it is better to whiteboard cyber-efficiently than to enable globally. We will reintermediate the jargon-based term "customer-directed". Think mega-B2B2C. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! A company that can benchmark correctly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to actualize correctly. Think macro-mission-critical. Have you ever been pressured to repurpose your feature set? Instantly? We believe we know that it is better to unleash super-strategically than to utilize intuitively. We will widen our ability to implement without reducing our capacity to actualize. We have come to know that if you envisioneer transparently then you may also seize perfectly. If you deliver proactively, you may have to orchestrate virtually. We have come to know that if you iterate magnetically then you may also iterate seamlessly. Think ubiquitous. If you engineer proactively, you may have to facilitate virally. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and VOIP. It sounds stunning, but it's accurate! It sounds fabulous, but it's 100 percent realistic!