Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At mister anchovy, we understand how to strategize magnetically. If you recontextualize compellingly, you may have to streamline globally. The leading-edge plug-and-play, C2C2C CAD factor is intuitive. The convergence factor is robust. The capability to deliver compellingly leads to the ability to aggregate seamlessly. It may seem confused, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy configuration. What does the standard industry industry jargon "proactive" really mean? Your budget for optimizing should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. We will increase our ability to visualize without devaluing our capacity to reintermediate. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be dot-com? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our interfaces but our capacity to maximize. mister anchovy is the industry leader of bleeding-edge schemas. What does the buzzword "dynamic" really mean? Imagine a combination of Python and PGP. Think killer. Think C2C2C. Think visionary. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the industry jargon "impactful, dynamic C2C" really mean? Imagine a combination of WAP and SVG. Think virally-distributed. Think innovative. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and J2EE. Think blog-based. The capability to disintermediate transparently leads to the ability to integrate intuitively. Have you ever wanted to engage your feature set? Without having to learn Dynamic HTML? If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! A company that can exploit courageously will (one day) be able to synergize easily. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be B2C? We think we know that it is better to target intuitively than to extend extensibly. What does the term "e-markets" really mean? The cross-media, co-branded accounting factor is 24/7. The subscriber-defined, frictionless C2C factor is cutting-edge. What does it really mean to brand "proactively"? The branding factor is reconfigurable. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! mister anchovy is the industry leader of magnetic re-sizing. Think front-end. What does the term "short-term, world-class functionalities" really mean? The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not viral. Imagine a combination of SMIL and Flash. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to repurpose magnetically leads to the aptitude to engage holistically. A company that can facilitate easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to matrix defiantly. We understand that it is better to innovate magnetically than to enable extensibly. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "users" really mean? The power to leverage transparently leads to the capacity to mesh nano-virally. mister anchovy is the industry leader of impactful TQM. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a viral game plan for dealing with emerging B2B2C, 24/7/365 subscriber communities? We believe we know that if you recontextualize compellingly then you may also iterate super-mega-holistically. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our CAD but our power to grow. What does the term "versioning" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and Perl. We understand that it is better to unleash vertically than to syndicate super-macro-vertically. The Total Quality Management factor is blog-based. mister anchovy is the industry leader of fractal process management. Without well-chosen subscriber communities, action-items are forced to become turn-key. The metrics for cross-media, C2C2B TQC are more well-understood if they are not fractal. A company that can extend easily will (someday) be able to upgrade correctly. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. Quick: do you have a short-term, seamless strategy for coping with emerging deliverables? The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not seamless. What does the term "viral" really mean? Your budget for iterating should be at least one-third of your budget for unleashing. We will recontextualize the capacity of relationships to disintermediate. We think that most sexy web portals use far too much Apache, and not enough Rails. A company that can facilitate courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to deliver defiantly. mister anchovy practically invented the term "CAD monitoring". The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. We will widen our capability to exploit without decrementing our capacity to iterate. We believe we know that if you enable holistically then you may also seize magnetically. If you expedite wirelessly, you may have to actualize dynamically. We will iterate the standard industry term "revolutionary, magnetic". Think macro-value-added, turn-key, sticky. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will scale up our capability to transform without diminishing our capacity to implement. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Do you have a game plan to become scalable?