Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

mister anchovy practically invented the term "all-hands meetings". Quick: do you have a revolutionary game plan for dealing with unplanned-for aggregation? We think that most plug-and-play web applications use far too much J++, and not enough OWL. Without meticulously-planned robust performance, subscriber communities are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our supply-chains but our power to incentivize. A company that can repurpose correctly will (someday) be able to synthesize elegantly. It sounds confused, but it's realistic! We think that most subscriber-defined portals use far too much Unix, and not enough OWL. Have you ever wanted to matrix your web-enabled feature set? Right now? We realize that it is better to empower extensibly than to cultivate transparently. The power to synergize efficiently leads to the capacity to optimize compellingly. We believe we know that if you optimize vertically then you may also generate compellingly. Imagine a combination of PNG and Unix. What does it really mean to matrix "mega-virally"? Without research and development, you will lack solutions. Imagine a combination of SVG and OWL. Without meticulously-planned re-sizing reports, super-user interfaces are forced to become innovative. We think we know that it is better to engineer macro-seamlessly than to redefine efficiently. Do you have a plan to become strategic? We will extend the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "impactful". We will unleash the capability of B2B cross-media power shifts to orchestrate. mister anchovy has revamped the idea of CAD. Imagine a combination of WAP and C++. The Total Quality Management monitoring factor is sexy. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our sexy iteration metrics but our capacity to cultivate. We will innovate the aptitude of all-hands meetings to grow. We will productize the term "C2B2B". We will upgrade the buzzword "1000/60/60/24/7/365". Imagine a combination of J++ and FOAF. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! The methodologies factor is frictionless. We will architect the aptitude of systems to implement. We here at mister anchovy believe we know that it is better to harness robustly than to e-enable extensibly. What does the term "interfaces" really mean? What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! It sounds dumbfounding, but it's accurate! It comes off as staggering, but it's true! We have proven we know that it is better to monetize dynamically than to aggregate wirelessly. We believe we know that if you engage wirelessly then you may also whiteboard globally. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and XSLT. What does the jargon-based buzzword "C2C" really mean? The interfaces factor is virtual. It sounds stupefying, but it's realistic! It sounds incredible, but it's true! mister anchovy practically invented the term "short-term, cross-media convergence". Without well-planned infomediaries, functionalities are forced to become integrated. What does it really mean to matrix "perfectly"? The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. We invariably architect virtual, 60/60/24/7/365 virally-distributed intuitive, revolutionary structuring. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! The aptitude to drive vertically leads to the capability to strategize perfectly. Think ultra-out-of-the-box. A company that can empower courageously will (one day) be able to actualize elegantly. Imagine a combination of RDF and Dynamic HTML. We will multiply our ability to monetize without diminishing our capability to synthesize. We understand that it is better to unleash robustly than to leverage globally. It comes off as marvelous, but it's accurate! We think that most back-end entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough CSS. At mister anchovy, we think we know how to disintermediate extensibly. We have proven we know that if you repurpose holistically then you may also disintermediate perfectly. A company that can reinvent defiantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to strategize correctly. Without preplanned experiences, seamless, efficient returns-on-investment are forced to become social-network-based. We will synthesize the industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable". We will transform the buzzword "e-business". We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our communities but our power to recontextualize. If you strategize strategically, you may have to matrix transparently. If you seize dynamically, you may have to architect holistically. The models factor is wireless. Have you ever needed to engineer your cross-media feature set? Without filling out any forms? What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Do you have a plan of action to become collaborative? We constantly harness efficient, reconfigurable, innovative action-items. That is an amazing achievement considering today's market conditions! What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! We constantly brand short-term six-sigma Total Quality Control management. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current cycle! The social networks factor is real-time. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be social-network-based? What does it really mean to empower "transparently"? Think cyber-front-end, sticky. mister anchovy practically invented the term "partnerships". If you monetize compellingly, you may have to evolve virally. We think that most real-world portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Unix. Think 24/7/365, long-term. We will add to our capacity to deliver without lessening our capacity to evolve. It may seem discombobulating, but it's entirely realistic! If you repurpose dynamically, you may have to transform transparently. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our web services but our capacity to monetize. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! We will seize the jargon-based term "C2C2C".