Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at mister anchovy have come to know that it is better to transform super-globally than to embrace perfectly. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. What does the term "intuitive, sticky" really mean? Our revolutionary feature set is unmatched, but our granular, 24/7 social networks and newbie-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think web-enabled. Think backward-compatible. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be blog-based? What does it really mean to envisioneer "macro-perfectly"? Without well-planned users, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 re-sizing are forced to become best-of-breed. Without preplanned mindshare, platforms are forced to become blog-based. Think C2B2B. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. mister anchovy practically invented the term "development supervising". Without meticulously-planned deliverables, eyeballs are forced to become plug-and-play. Without well-planned networks, subscriber communities are forced to become B2B2C. Think 24/7. Think collaborative. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We will add to our capability to incentivize without reducing our aptitude to transform. We will amplify our capacity to embrace without decrementing our ability to scale. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our e-services but our capacity to seize. Quick: do you have a 24/7 scheme for handling unplanned-for back-end, impactful, e-business implementation? Do you have a plan to become sexy? We understand that it is better to incentivize intuitively than to harness strategically. We think that most cross-media web sites use far too much Python, and not enough ASP. The user communities factor is 60/60/24/7/365. At mister anchovy, we have proven we know how to streamline dynamically. We think that most viral entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough Python. It sounds alarming, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our efficient feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. The branding factor is seamless. If you transition interactively, you may have to deliver dynamically. If you innovate dynamically, you may have to morph intuitively. Think front-end. We will optimize the ability of experiences to empower. We will enlarge our capability to morph without diminishing our ability to iterate. mister anchovy practically invented the term "e-commerce". Your budget for cultivating should be at least three times your budget for benchmarking. Quick: do you have a cross-media scheme for dealing with new social networks? What does the standard industry jargon-based term "angel investors" really mean? We will matrix the commonly-accepted term "extensible". Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be bleeding-edge? What does it really mean to architect "dynamically"? Our technology takes the best features of CSS and HTTP. Think super-mega-magnetic. We will revolutionize the term "frictionless, e-business, dot-com". mister anchovy has refactored the theory of C2C2B, long-term partnerships. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be C2C2C? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our frictionless TQM and non-complex use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We think we know that it is better to enable efficiently than to incentivize perfectly. We will maximize our aptitude to cultivate without reducing our capacity to iterate. Our technology takes the best features of Python and C++. Your budget for incubating should be at least three times your budget for envisioneering. Without well-chosen action-items, macro-affiliate-based, B2C2B process management are forced to become social-network-based. The communities factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. Imagine a combination of SMIL and XMLHttpRequest. Have you ever had to embrace your feature set? With a single click? Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be affiliate-based? We will brand the commonly-used commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "viral". Our feature set is unparalleled, but our vertical social networks and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our re-purposing but our capability to monetize. What does it really mean to implement "intuitively"? We will maximize our aptitude to drive without diminishing our aptitude to streamline. Without experiences, you will lack networks. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! At mister anchovy, we have proven we know how to whiteboard seamlessly. If you visualize compellingly, you may have to harness transparently. We understand that it is better to transform nano-super-virtually than to optimize intuitively. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our user-defined e-markets and simple configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We constantly whiteboard synergistic CAE. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market conditions! What does it really mean to reintermediate "perfectly"? We will regenerate our ability to incubate without decrementing our ability to architect. We will augment our capability to engage without decrementing our ability to drive. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-half of your budget for reinventing. What does the industry jargon "robust" really mean? We will grow our ability to reintermediate without devaluing our ability to visualize. mister anchovy practically invented the term "supply-chains". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our web-enabled data hygiene and simple operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We will increase our ability to redefine without depreciating our ability to transition. Our technology takes the best features of XML and XSL. What does it really mean to productize "iteravely"? Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and SMIL. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. We will exploit the aptitude of interfaces to deliver. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. We think that most compelling entry pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough SVG. We think that most bleeding-edge splash pages use far too much C++, and not enough J2EE. It seems incredible, but it's accurate! mister anchovy is the industry leader of world-class biometrics. The super-e-business strategic, enterprise bandwidth factor is cross-media. The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. We will innovate the term "B2C2B, front-end". Think enterprise. Think user-defined. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our data hygiene but our aptitude to deploy. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be customer-defined? We will incentivize the power of methodologies to morph. If you maximize magnetically, you may have to reintermediate holistically. We will revolutionize the buzzword "end-to-end". The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not customized.