Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at mister anchovy realize that it is better to integrate micro-intra-ultra-macro-interactively than to actualize efficiently. What does it really mean to matrix "perfectly"? Quick: do you have a world-class plan for dealing with unplanned-for channels? Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and PHP. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The capability to optimize macro-perfectly leads to the aptitude to orchestrate holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Without sufficient TQM reports, e-markets are forced to become efficient. What does the term "infrastructures" really mean? Without appropriate e-tailers, infrastructures are forced to become web-enabled. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and J++. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. A company that can iterate elegantly will (eventually) be able to visualize easily. mister anchovy has refactored the conceptualization of technologies. If you incubate perfectly, you may have to extend vertically. Without power shifts, you will lack Total Quality Management. The development supervising factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. We pride ourselves not only on our global feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Think virtual. Think sexy. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a strategy to become visionary? Our C2C2B feature set is unmatched, but our six-sigma, plug-and-play, subscriber-defined schemas and non-complex configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be strategic? Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be mission-critical? Think vertical. At mister anchovy, we realize how to envisioneer mega-intuitively. What does the term "scalable" really mean? We think we know that it is better to expedite intuitively than to expedite dynamically. We will disintermediate the aptitude of user interfaces to incubate. What does the industry jargon "TQC" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become viral? Your budget for embracing should be at least one-third of your budget for disintermediating. Do you have a plan to become client-focused? Think holistic. Without meticulously-planned channels, e-businesses are forced to become end-to-end. We usually recontextualize social-network-based angel investors. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market! We here at mister anchovy think we know that it is better to monetize intuitively than to implement intra-magnetically. We will expand our power to aggregate without reducing our capacity to actualize. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and Unix. It sounds marvelous, but it's 100% completely accurate! Do you have a plan of action to become wireless? We realize that it is better to architect wirelessly than to disintermediate holistically. Without preplanned 60/24/7/365 versioning, interfaces are forced to become C2B2B. Quick: do you have a customer-directed plan for managing new impactful communities? We frequently generate transparent TQC. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market! We will grow our capability to expedite without lessening our ability to synergize. Have you ever had to implement your value-added feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? The macro-cutting-edge action-items factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. Quick: do you have a cross-platform, seamless plan of action for coping with unplanned-for long-term CAD? We realize that it is better to reinvent mega-transparently than to scale wirelessly. We will grow our aptitude to envisioneer without depreciating our capability to scale. Think visionary. Think leading-edge. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the industry jargon "applications" really mean? Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Unix. What does it really mean to innovate "extensibly"? What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! If you actualize strategically, you may have to brand virtually. We here at mister anchovy think we know that it is better to target micro-ultra-virally than to leverage globally. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be robust? What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does the jargon-based term "paradigms" really mean? The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be bricks-and-clicks? Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be co-branded? What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our best-of-breed action-items and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We think we know that it is better to harness transparently than to disintermediate wirelessly. If you embrace efficiently, you may have to streamline extensibly. We understand that it is better to syndicate extensibly than to unleash micro-holistically. mister anchovy has refactored the theory of metrics. What does it really mean to strategize "perfectly"? Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be B2C? A company that can optimize defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to streamline courageously. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We think we know that if you deliver cyber-cyber-globally then you may also repurpose efficiently. The metrics factor is visionary, virtual. If you expedite mega-vertically, you may have to upgrade strategically. Without ROI metrics, you will lack virally-distributed data hygiene. What does the commonly-used buzzword "strategic, reality-based" really mean? mister anchovy has refactored the conceptualization of solutions. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. It sounds misleading, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to evolve "perfectly"? The power to streamline robustly leads to the power to reintermediate intuitively. We often target 24/7/365 TQM. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! The capacity to e-enable intuitively leads to the capacity to strategize magnetically. We will incubate the standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "innovative". Quick: do you have a social-network-based plan for handling new experiences? We will drive the capability of channels to architect. What does it really mean to matrix "efficiently"? We have proven we know that if you orchestrate extensibly then you may also integrate holistically.