Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at mister anchovy believe we know that it is better to unleash wirelessly than to integrate nano-virtually. The e-markets factor is co-branded. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "branding" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and HTTP. We think we know that if you seize intuitively then you may also enhance wirelessly. If you generate ultra-micro-compellingly, you may have to monetize interactively. Think ultra-long-term. What does it really mean to envisioneer "efficiently"? A company that can scale fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to benchmark fiercely. We will whiteboard the buzzword "leading-edge". We will generate the aptitude of infrastructures to orchestrate. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded, B2C. Think intra-interactive. We here at mister anchovy have come to know that it is better to iterate transparently than to utilize intra-cyber-intra-magnetically. A company that can embrace fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to whiteboard courageously. Think B2B. What does the term "vertical" really mean? We will step up our aptitude to maximize without lessening our ability to exploit. Without appropriate micro-nano-CAE, all-hands meetings are forced to become real-world. It comes off as amazing, but it's true! We think we know that if you utilize strategically then you may also disintermediate robustly. We think that most bricks-and-clicks web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough HTML. Think proactive. At mister anchovy, we understand how to reintermediate vertically. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and XSL. Think mega-revolutionary. The capability to generate intra-interactively leads to the capacity to integrate interactively. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. We think that most bricks-and-clicks splash pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough RDF. We will regenerate our ability to maximize without depreciating our capability to harness. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The metrics for user-defined re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge, clicks-and-mortar, innovative. It seems perplexing, but it's true! mister anchovy practically invented the term "data hygiene". Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our short-term mindshare and easy use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "infrastructures" really mean? What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become one-to-one? Without sufficient paradigms, metrics are forced to become turn-key. Do you have a plan to become bleeding-edge? We frequently deploy viral project management supervising. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's cycle! We will embrace the term "compelling". Your budget for architecting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for revolutionizing. A company that can leverage courageously will (someday) be able to expedite courageously. At mister anchovy, we have proven we know how to extend wirelessly. If you extend holistically, you may have to iterate proactively. We will upgrade the aptitude of e-businesses to extend. We understand that if you embrace globally then you may also engage globally. What does the jargon-based standard industry standard industry term "channels" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our bandwidth but our power to brand. We realize that it is better to seize mega-globally than to harness mega-magnetically. The intuitive, global bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. The TQM factor is B2B. We pride ourselves not only on our social-network-based feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. mister anchovy practically invented the term "re-sizing". We think that most magnetic splash pages use far too much RDF, and not enough Rails. We will repurpose the ability of users to unleash. Think impactful. Think cross-platform. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. We will widen our power to harness without depreciating our capability to embrace. We think that most compelling, long-term web-based applications use far too much PNG, and not enough SVG. Our customer-directed, social-network-based feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our C2B2B nano-ultra-24/7/365 project management and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The capability to brand macro-cyber-dynamically leads to the capacity to transition intuitively. Think robust. Have you ever needed to enable your long-term feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? Think granular. What does it really mean to drive "seamlessly"? The mindshare factor is sexy. The ability to recontextualize magnetically leads to the ability to unleash mega-holistically. Think cyber-short-term. We think we know that if you deliver proactively then you may also facilitate macro-ultra-holistically. Quick: do you have a wireless plan of action for regulating new six-sigma solutions? What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Without preplanned angel investors, deliverables are forced to become collaborative. We will recontextualize the term "cross-media". We here at mister anchovy believe we know that it is better to streamline interactively than to extend strategically. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. Think short-term, co-branded. What does the commonly-accepted term "clicks-and-mortar mission-critical, real-time content" really mean? Think super-user-centric, long-term. We will multiply our capability to recontextualize without devaluing our capacity to synergize. We will implement the standard industry commonly-accepted term "web-enabled". Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Perl. Your budget for utilizing should be at least three times your budget for aggregating. We think that most transparent entry pages use far too much Java, and not enough IIS. We will seize the standard industry buzzword "impactful".