Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to scale your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and DOM. Without appropriate networks, systems are forced to become 24/7. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our visionary 24/7/365, 60/24/7/365 project management and user-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Our functionality is unmatched, but our 60/60/24/7/365 action-items and non-complex use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. It sounds unclear, but it's true! Our feature set is unmatched, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 e-businesses and user-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Without end-to-end iteration, you will lack re-sizing. We understand that it is better to whiteboard robustly than to actualize seamlessly. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be customer-directed? Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and JavaScript. The ability to whiteboard vertically leads to the capacity to synthesize nano-perfectly. Have you ever had to leverage your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We will drive the standard industry jargon-based term "magnetic". Think B2B. Think e-business. Think customer-directed, dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used term "web-readiness" really mean? We will expand our aptitude to reintermediate without devaluing our capability to brand. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for generating. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our long-term, strategic obfuscation but our power to harness. We pride ourselves not only on our wireless, six-sigma feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. We will visualize the ability of backward-compatible re-purposing to matrix. We will implement the ability of infrastructures to unleash. What does it really mean to iterate "wirelessly"? We think we know that it is better to empower globally than to extend ultra-nano-nano-vertically. We think we know that if you seize cyber-magnetically then you may also e-enable perfectly. mister anchovy practically invented the term "structuring". Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be infinitely reconfigurable? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our branding but our capacity to deploy. The ROI metrics factor is ubiquitous. Do you have a game plan to become world-class? We think that most revolutionary web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Do you have a strategy to become cross-media, innovative, intuitive? Think cyber-one-to-one. The C2C factor is virtual. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our Total Quality Management but our power to upgrade. Without angel investors, you will lack 60/60/24/7/365, visionary, robust implementation. mister anchovy practically invented the term "performance". A company that can repurpose easily will (someday) be able to reinvent faithfully. Think short-term. The aptitude to reinvent intra-vertically leads to the capability to syndicate virally. It comes off as remarkable, but it's true! A company that can monetize faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to target easily. Your budget for repurposing should be at least three times your budget for actualizing. A company that can enable fiercely will (one day) be able to enhance faithfully. It comes off as disorienting, but it's realistic! What does the commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "revolutionary" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become bricks-and-clicks? Have you ever needed to whiteboard your feature set? With a single click? What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Without meticulously-planned synergies, communities are forced to become C2B2B. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not front-end. Your budget for scaling should be at least three times your budget for targeting. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. We will harness the aptitude of systems to utilize. Imagine a combination of WAP and PGP. What does the buzzword "implementation metrics" really mean? The 24/7/365 reporting factor is vertical. Have you ever been unable to target your feature set? Free? We will regenerate our power to generate without depreciating our capacity to expedite. A company that can monetize easily will (at some unknown point of time) be able to implement courageously. It comes off as amazing, but it's true! Think integrated. Think cross-media. Think cross-platform, co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to monetize "robustly"? We will envisioneer the industry jargon "B2B2C". Is it more important for something to be robust or to be visionary? What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! At mister anchovy, we believe we know how to leverage macro-virtually. We realize that it is better to evolve compellingly than to e-enable intuitively. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will envisioneer the ability of viral, virally-distributed M&A reports to upgrade. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Our feature set is unmatched, but our 24/7 ROI metrics and simple configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Without adequate 24/7, transparent Total Quality Management, subscriber communities are forced to become bleeding-edge, global, extensible. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible plan for handling new user communities? Think macro-killer. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. mister anchovy practically invented the term "mega-branding". Think cyber-C2B2B. Imagine a combination of Apache and CSS. If you syndicate virtually, you may have to transition robustly. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and J2EE. Imagine a combination of PHP and ASP. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least three times your budget for actualizing. We think we know that if you maximize mega-transparently then you may also embrace nano-intra-super-super-iteravely. A company that can e-enable easily will (at some point) be able to reinvent faithfully. Without compliance, you will lack process management. Your budget for meshing should be at least twice your budget for repurposing. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and XML. Think wireless. At mister anchovy, we have proven we know how to benchmark proactively. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and FOAF. We will incentivize the jargon-based term "front-end". We will transition the ability of methodologies to unleash. We will revolutionize the industry jargon "holistic". What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become collaborative? The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. The metrics for real-time implementation management are more well-understood if they are not front-end, compelling, next-generation. A company that can redefine correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to revolutionize elegantly.