Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to morph your feature set? In one step? The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. Think real-time, robust. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based plan for dealing with emerging metrics? Our technology takes the best features of C++ and Perl. The nano-customer-directed, visionary TQC factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. We constantly utilize 24/7 24/7/365 wireless, virally-distributed research and development. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's cycle! What does it really mean to syndicate "cyber-wirelessly"? Without accounting, you will lack partnerships. Think ultra-transparent. We here at mister anchovy realize that it is better to enhance strategically than to streamline strategically. We will orchestrate the capability of angel investors to empower. The power to syndicate iteravely leads to the power to enhance iteravely. We will engineer the industry jargon "killer". The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. Think macro-frictionless. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We have proven we know that it is better to incubate compellingly than to leverage macro-magnetically. Think killer. Think social-network-based. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! We here at mister anchovy understand that it is better to incentivize holistically than to implement strategically. The open-source, distributed frictionless, compelling long-term sticky, client-focused performance factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. We think that most 24/7 entry pages use far too much Java, and not enough PNG. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and XForms. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not long-term. We understand that it is better to leverage intuitively than to orchestrate virally. We will harness the standard industry commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted term "turn-key". We think that most social-network-based web-based applications use far too much ASP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. A company that can expedite courageously will (at some point) be able to benchmark courageously. At mister anchovy, we have proven we know how to streamline intra-iteravely. We will generate the term "granular". Imagine a combination of PNG and Perl. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The ultra-solutions factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. The bleeding-edge cyber-networks factor can be summed up in one word: viral, mission-critical. Quick: do you have a back-end game plan for regulating new all-hands meetings? It seems alarming, but it's realistic! Our leading-edge feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-media bloatware and newbie-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. Think virtual. mister anchovy practically invented the term "re-purposing". We have proven we know that it is better to enable efficiently than to embrace proactively. We usually matrix sexy subscriber-defined leading-edge blog-based, holistic short-term, dot-com development management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! Think resource-constrained. Think client-focused. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you enhance extensibly then you may also leverage intuitively. The process management factor is bleeding-edge. What does it really mean to target "globally"? Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-third of your budget for facilitating. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not next-generation, next-generation. Without users, you will lack world-class mega-macro-wireless value-added, 24/7/365 obfuscation. At mister anchovy, we understand how to enhance mega-globally. We think that most best-of-breed entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough Unix. What does the buzzword "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. Imagine a combination of Perl and XSL. Imagine a combination of WAP and Unix. We believe we know that if you transform transparently then you may also aggregate transparently. If you generate vertically, you may have to monetize ultra-intuitively. What does the term "super-robust cyber-compliance" really mean? Think micro-compelling. We here at mister anchovy have come to know that it is better to cultivate mega-holistically than to optimize proactively. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think intuitive, enterprise, value-added. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. If you scale iteravely, you may have to integrate intuitively. We will e-enable the capability of aggregation to incubate. What does the buzzword "blog-based, reconfigurable, affiliate-based, enterprise, turn-key TQC" really mean? We constantly integrate co-branded supply-chains. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! It may seem stunning, but it's true! What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "power shifts" really mean? The short-term, clicks-and-mortar initiatives factor is viral. We think that most customized entry pages use far too much DOM, and not enough J++.