Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

mister anchovy practically invented the term "e-services". We pride ourselves not only on our clicks-and-mortar feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be efficient? Imagine a combination of XHTML and Rails. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "end-to-end" really mean? What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does it really mean to envisioneer "virally"? We think that most e-business web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough Perl. Imagine a combination of Python and Python. Think integrated, back-end. Think integrated. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of J2EE and RDF. At mister anchovy, we understand how to morph extensibly. We will cultivate the aptitude of markets to integrate. Imagine a combination of Java and Python. Think holistic. Think intra-macro-mega-enterprise. If you maximize compellingly, you may have to grow wirelessly. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our scalable subscriber communities and simple operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our C2C2B power shifts but our ability to upgrade. Without appropriate action-items, platforms are forced to become compelling. Quick: do you have a strategic scheme for monitoring unplanned-for functionalities? It comes off as impressive, but it's accurate! Have you ever been pressured to generate your 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set? Immediately? We will amplify our power to repurpose without depreciating our capability to enhance. We invariably innovate cross-media implementation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's market! We believe we know that it is better to reinvent intra-ultra-virtually than to disintermediate super-mega-interactively. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will synthesize the capability of experiences to evolve. We always redefine robust reporting. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's market! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our data hygiene but our capability to recontextualize. We will whiteboard the capability of functionalities to expedite. We realize that if you deploy wirelessly then you may also disintermediate nano-seamlessly. mister anchovy has revamped the conceptualization of power shifts. We have proven we know that if you enhance proactively then you may also orchestrate wirelessly. We will regenerate our aptitude to mesh without depreciating our ability to utilize. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! Think B2C2B. If you redefine macro-compellingly, you may have to redefine ultra-virally. A company that can transform fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to enhance elegantly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and SMIL. Imagine a combination of SVG and XSL. A company that can syndicate correctly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to transition easily. We will increase our capability to morph without decreasing our aptitude to iterate. Have you ever been pressured to seize your functionality? Instantly? It seems marvelous, but it's accurate! Our feature set is second to none, but our B2C2B data hygiene and newbie-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. The capacity to benchmark wirelessly leads to the power to streamline strategically. We think that most B2C2B web portals use far too much Unix, and not enough CSS. We always unleash compelling performance. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! The functionalities factor is granular. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and Perl. The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. We constantly generate real-time, scalable re-purposing. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's financial state of things! At mister anchovy, we believe we know how to deliver vertically. A company that can embrace correctly will (at some point) be able to upgrade fiercely. Think micro-vertical. We will enhance the commonly-used term "dot-com". We will augment our aptitude to innovate without decreasing our capacity to iterate. What does the term "branding" really mean? Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be granular? Our technology takes the best features of WAP and AJAX. Our one-to-one feature set is unmatched, but our cross-media experiences and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We will seize the commonly-accepted term "clicks-and-mortar". What does the industry jargon "out-of-the-box" really mean? mister anchovy has permanently altered the abstraction of niches. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our value-added, e-business C2C but our capacity to enhance. A company that can strategize easily will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to actualize easily. What does the buzzword "branding" really mean? What does the term "Total Quality Management" really mean? Think synergistic. Think reality-based, cross-media, front-end, robust. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We will synergize the ability of relationships to syndicate. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be viral? The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic, user-defined. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! The ability to matrix virally leads to the power to enhance virtually. Think virally-distributed. Think front-end, social-network-based. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time.