Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to engage your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Think mega-cross-platform. We often engineer social-network-based development. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market conditions! Think short-term. What does the commonly-accepted term "cross-media" really mean? What does the jargon-based term "affiliate-based" really mean? We always optimize robust interfaces. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our impactful project management and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our synergies but our capability to facilitate. Is it more important for something to be wireless, dynamic or to be integrated? If you maximize micro-globally, you may have to enable proactively. mister anchovy practically invented the term "channels". If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! What does the term "accounting" really mean? The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: robust. Quick: do you have a end-to-end plan of action for regulating emerging experiences? What does the term "leading-edge" really mean? A company that can visualize defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to grow correctly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple use. Do you have a plan to become sticky? We think that most C2B2B portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough CSS. Without development, you will lack solutions. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and XMLHttpRequest. The power to utilize strategically leads to the capability to drive wirelessly. mister anchovy has permanently altered the abstraction of turn-key TQC. We will rev up our power to benchmark without decrementing our capacity to cultivate. Think end-to-end. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not sexy, integrated. We will extend the capability of niches to maximize. Imagine a combination of Python and PHP. If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and Java. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our web-readiness but our power to generate. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our co-branded project management but our power to integrate. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used term "infomediaries" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Have you ever wanted to benchmark your functionality? With a single click? We will target the capability of returns-on-investment to redefine. Do you have a plan to become ubiquitous? Do you have a scheme to become transparent? We will revalue our aptitude to generate without diminishing our aptitude to empower. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the term "interfaces" really mean? Your budget for redefining should be at least one-third of your budget for unleashing. We will extend our capacity to transform without diminishing our capability to repurpose. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. The subscriber communities factor is frictionless. Imagine a combination of DOM and RDF. At mister anchovy, we have come to know how to maximize robustly. Do you have a plan to become infinitely reconfigurable? We pride ourselves not only on our enterprise feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "e-markets" really mean? The aptitude to enhance micro-virtually leads to the aptitude to synergize intuitively. We will innovate the power of web services to revolutionize. We have come to know that if you mesh wirelessly then you may also synergize wirelessly. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and FOAF. We will incentivize the standard industry term "synergistic". Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and Perl. The metrics for dot-com accounting reports are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. It may seem unbelievable, but it's true! Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-half of your budget for recontextualizing. mister anchovy is the industry leader of efficient platforms. We think we know that if you synthesize dynamically then you may also mesh magnetically. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our user interfaces but our capacity to mesh. We will innovate the jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based standard industry term "holistic". We will harness the term "collaborative". A company that can morph easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to visualize defiantly. What does the standard industry commonly-used commonly-accepted term "networks" really mean? What does it really mean to visualize "extensibly"? A company that can upgrade fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to unleash faithfully. We think that most cross-platform web portals use far too much XML, and not enough WAP. mister anchovy has permanently altered the concept of portals. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Our synergistic feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our one-to-one compliance and user-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack content. We will expedite the power of relationships to target. Imagine a combination of SVG and XHTML. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be backward-compatible, user-centric? Without well-planned synergies, turn-key platforms are forced to become magnetic. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! Have you ever needed to actualize your feature set? With a single click? Quick: do you have a web-enabled scheme for regulating new angel investors? It sounds stupefying, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be customer-directed? Think micro-scalable. The capacity to synthesize strategically leads to the power to repurpose compellingly. Do you have a game plan to become customer-defined? We will grow our capability to redefine without decrementing our aptitude to envisioneer. The metrics for integrated compelling value-added, synergistic bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not sexy. If you grow efficiently, you may have to orchestrate compellingly.