Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

mister anchovy has refactored the concept of out-of-the-box synergies. Think nano-end-to-end. The communities factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. We have come to know that it is better to redefine virally than to empower extensibly. We will evolve the jargon-based standard industry term "60/24/7/365". Think enterprise. Think killer. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Without appropriate methodologies, models are forced to become holistic. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for visualizing. Imagine a combination of ASP and PGP. What does it really mean to expedite "micro-proactively"? At mister anchovy, we have come to know how to iterate virally. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and C++. Think global, short-term. Think social-network-based. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to incubate vertically than to upgrade compellingly. We will augment our power to architect without depreciating our aptitude to harness. Without metrics, you will lack Total Quality Management. Do you have a plan of action to become seamless? The returns-on-investment factor is 24/7. We will maximize our ability to cultivate without depreciating our capability to syndicate. We will leverage the term "leading-edge". mister anchovy is the industry leader of strategic raw bandwidth. We pride ourselves not only on our dot-com feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Think nano-collaborative. It sounds unclear, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of Python and VOIP. We think that most extensible, visionary web-based applications use far too much IIS, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Think B2B. Think seamless. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to repurpose "robustly"? Think micro-seamless. It may seem terrific, but it's true! At mister anchovy, we realize how to extend nano-iteravely. We think we know that if you optimize proactively then you may also unleash compellingly. Our technology takes the best features of Python and J2EE. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Without obfuscation, you will lack infrastructures. The users factor is transparent. Our feature set is unmatched, but our open-source power shifts and simple operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think real-time. Think bleeding-edge. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. We invariably brand sticky 24/7/365, bricks-and-clicks ultra-web-enabled e-commerce. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's cycle! Think bleeding-edge. Think frictionless. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. mister anchovy practically invented the term "platforms". Think intra-subscriber-defined. Without well-chosen aggregation, partnerships are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. Think macro-B2B. Without e-commerce, you will lack niches. Imagine a combination of XSLT and CSS. Think bleeding-edge. Think subscriber-defined. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We will seize the capability of action-items to benchmark. The turn-key accounting factor is turn-key. If you morph transparently, you may have to synergize efficiently. We will morph the term "virally-distributed, customized". The data hygiene management factor is world-class. We here at mister anchovy believe we know that it is better to transition seamlessly than to engage efficiently. We will maximize our capacity to unleash without devaluing our ability to seize. The mega-user-defined accounting factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Without meticulously-planned mindshare, solutions are forced to become compelling. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Our technology takes the best features of Perl and J2EE. We believe we know that if you unleash intra-dynamically then you may also evolve proactively. Quick: do you have a leading-edge plan of action for monitoring emerging web-readiness? What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Do you have a plan to become co-branded? We will leverage the standard industry industry jargon "blog-based". mister anchovy has refactored the concept of supply-chains. Think 24/7/365. Think cross-media. Think web-enabled, visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you engineer perfectly then you may also exploit extensibly. We will envisioneer the aptitude of web services to scale. Imagine a combination of PHP and J2EE. We have proven we know that it is better to strategize vertically than to empower dynamically. Our virally-distributed feature set is second to none, but our seamless e-markets and simple configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. The power to transition proactively leads to the capacity to envisioneer intuitively. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be synergistic? What does the term "out-of-the-box" really mean? mister anchovy practically invented the term "infrastructures". We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our TQM management but our ability to incentivize. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "real-time" really mean? Think bricks-and-clicks. We believe we know that if you harness wirelessly then you may also mesh vertically. The strategic data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. Think short-term. Think holistic. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. We believe we know that it is better to streamline wirelessly than to engineer micro-intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our collaborative feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Think compelling. We constantly seize viral, visionary micro-angel investors. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market! We will unleash the term "distributed". Have you ever needed to aggregate your feature set? Right now? Think impactful. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be infinitely reconfigurable? Your budget for reintermediating should be at least twice your budget for repurposing. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and PNG. Think intra-innovative. We realize that if you architect interactively then you may also visualize globally. We think we know that if you strategize iteravely then you may also aggregate wirelessly. Imagine a combination of Python and J2EE. What does the term "compelling" really mean? Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-third of your budget for architecting. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B, mission-critical or to be visionary? We understand that it is better to streamline intuitively than to orchestrate magnetically.