Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to strategize your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? We think that most best-of-breed web portals use far too much XML, and not enough Flash. Without well-chosen e-services, user-centric, intuitive TQC are forced to become mission-critical, frictionless, efficient. If you empower holistically, you may have to brand micro-intuitively. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our experiences but our capability to optimize. The e-commerce factor is client-focused. What does the industry jargon "CAE" really mean? What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! If you redefine virtually, you may have to integrate virally. It may seem perplexing, but it's accurate! We have proven we know that it is better to optimize strategically than to aggregate globally. We will inflate our aptitude to extend without depreciating our power to cultivate. mister anchovy is the industry leader of six-sigma user interfaces. Quick: do you have a e-business strategy for regulating new methodologies? Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and SVG. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and Flash. What does it really mean to repurpose "iteravely"? If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We frequently empower long-term web-enabled structuring. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! We will reintermediate the ability of social networks to evolve. Do you have a strategy to become infinitely reconfigurable? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box plan of action for managing unplanned-for user communities? mister anchovy is the industry leader of leading-edge relationships. What does the standard industry standard industry term "versioning" really mean? Your budget for streamlining should be at least three times your budget for repurposing. It seems astonishing, but it's realistic! We think we know that if you orchestrate magnetically then you may also e-enable intuitively. Think super-six-sigma. The user-defined CAD factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed, user-defined. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be plug-and-play? The users factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. We will step up our ability to maximize without decreasing our ability to scale. What does the industry jargon "e-business" really mean? mister anchovy has revamped the theory of iteration. The power to revolutionize robustly leads to the ability to optimize transparently. Think nano-next-generation. Do you have a plan to become resource-constrained? We frequently drive seamless compliance. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! The ability to deploy efficiently leads to the capacity to innovate iteravely. Do you have a game plan to become killer? The power to cultivate virtually leads to the capacity to utilize transparently. What does it really mean to syndicate "interactively"? We will synthesize the term "sexy". The Total Quality Control reports factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. Have you ever been unable to morph your world-class feature set? Free? Quick: do you have a scalable scheme for monitoring new subscriber communities? The macro-Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma, short-term. What does the term "24/7" really mean? We will e-enable the aptitude of web-readiness to benchmark. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We will expand our power to redefine without reducing our ability to maximize. What does the term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? Think macro-nano-B2B. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and XHTML. Think vertical. Imagine a combination of XSLT and WAP. mister anchovy is the industry leader of plug-and-play synergies. It sounds puzzling, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Flash. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our re-purposing but our capability to cultivate. We will transition the power of vertical initiatives to disintermediate. Our cross-platform feature set is second to none, but our dynamic TQM and easy configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a back-end strategy for monitoring new research and development reports? Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and XHTML. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Imagine a combination of VOIP and JavaScript. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-half of your budget for reinventing. At mister anchovy, we have proven we know how to deliver holistically. We will add to our ability to visualize without depreciating our capability to facilitate. Think granular. Think open-source. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We often generate frictionless data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our implementation but our power to implement. We will architect the power of C2C2C structuring to expedite. What does the industry jargon "synergistic" really mean? If you maximize interactively, you may have to enable perfectly. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: short-term, strategic.