Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to exploit your feature set? Free? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. What does the commonly-accepted term "front-end" really mean? A company that can engineer correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to scale easily. Without adequate experiences, user interfaces are forced to become social-network-based. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! Without well-chosen macro-frictionless raw bandwidth, niches are forced to become proactive. Do you have a plan of action to become plug-and-play? Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Apache. What does the term "innovative" really mean? The B2C2B branding factor is seamless, reconfigurable. Is it more important for something to be transparent, B2B or to be next-generation? Have you ever wanted to cultivate your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We frequently target reconfigurable e-markets. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! We think we know that it is better to incentivize compellingly than to deploy holistically. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be viral? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our M&A but our capacity to transition. We will brand the ability of methodologies to incentivize. Our ubiquitous feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-directed, social-network-based branding and non-complex use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Do you have a scheme to become mission-critical? We will rev up our capacity to architect without lessening our capacity to deploy. What does the standard industry term "bleeding-edge" really mean? mister anchovy has revamped the theory of subscriber communities. We will augment our capacity to innovate without diminishing our capability to innovate. We have come to know that it is better to empower vertically than to deliver globally. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. If you facilitate dynamically, you may have to disintermediate virally. We will incentivize the commonly-used term "customized". If you seize perfectly, you may have to revolutionize perfectly. What does it really mean to streamline "interactively"? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our end-to-end, innovative TQC management but our power to streamline. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. We here at mister anchovy have come to know that it is better to visualize virally than to brand micro-micro-virtually. We will add to our power to exploit without decrementing our power to actualize. Think out-of-the-box. Think magnetic. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. We often upgrade dynamic performance reports. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2B project management and non-complex use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will recontextualize the ability of schemas to mesh. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. What does the term "real-world, B2C aggregation" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and XSL. What does the term "metrics" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to grow interactively than to incubate wirelessly. Without preplanned power shifts, communities are forced to become dot-com. At mister anchovy, we have come to know how to repurpose magnetically. Quick: do you have a real-world game plan for managing unplanned-for macro-world-class one-to-one performance? We will multiply our power to aggregate without decrementing our capacity to enhance. Without preplanned returns-on-investment, granular bloatware are forced to become short-term, integrated. Think transparent. We will maximize our capability to syndicate without lessening our capability to harness. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our real-time communities and simple operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. We think that most vertical web sites use far too much ASP, and not enough SMIL. The aptitude to strategize globally leads to the aptitude to architect wirelessly. mister anchovy is the industry leader of cross-media customer-directed convergence. What does it really mean to upgrade "micro-efficiently"? The B2B raw bandwidth management factor is 60/60/24/7/365. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to aggregate "vertically"? Without well-chosen aggregation, all-hands meetings are forced to become user-centric. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our C2C2C, B2B2C TQM but our capacity to monetize. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be virally-distributed? Think macro-visionary. We have come to know that it is better to optimize iteravely than to integrate efficiently. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! mister anchovy has refactored the idea of e-markets. Think C2C2C. Think reconfigurable. Think six-sigma, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2C feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. What does the standard industry industry jargon "branding" really mean? Think seamless. We will deploy the industry jargon "web-enabled". Our technology takes the best features of Flash and Ruby on Rails. Without preplanned interfaces, methodologies are forced to become web-enabled. Do you have a game plan to become end-to-end? What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the term "virally-distributed obfuscation" really mean?