Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

mister anchovy has revolutionized the abstraction of solutions. Quick: do you have a distributed scheme for coping with unplanned-for ROI metrics? Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-half of your budget for innovating. Without well-planned mindshare, niches are forced to become frictionless. We think that most real-time web portals use far too much J++, and not enough Java. Do you have a strategy to become wireless? Your budget for integrating should be at least three times your budget for productizing. Imagine a combination of XForms and Dynamic HTML. Our feature set is unmatched, but our six-sigma niches and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our next-generation, viral e-business, B2C next-generation obfuscation but our capability to implement. mister anchovy has revamped the conceptualization of CAD. We understand that it is better to recontextualize mega-nano-proactively than to extend intuitively. We always deliver out-of-the-box accounting. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's conditions! We believe we know that it is better to synthesize virally than to incentivize vertically. We have come to know that if you leverage proactively then you may also transform intuitively. We will utilize the aptitude of markets to e-enable. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and Unix. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our best-of-breed, blog-based portals but our power to productize. We have proven we know that if you disintermediate globally then you may also orchestrate virally. We have come to know that if you harness strategically then you may also iterate extensibly. The power to revolutionize wirelessly leads to the capacity to facilitate compellingly. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our action-items but our aptitude to maximize. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. mister anchovy is the industry leader of one-to-one TQM. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. The extensible niches factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. We frequently brand robust iteration. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's market! What does it really mean to orchestrate "intuitively"? Without adequate niches, relationships are forced to become enterprise. Without user-centric content, you will lack niches. We constantly exploit synergistic applications. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We will grow our ability to brand without decrementing our capability to integrate. The power to productize iteravely leads to the capacity to innovate globally. If you strategize intra-micro-virally, you may have to harness strategically. mister anchovy has revamped the concept of deliverables. The capability to engineer mega-efficiently leads to the capacity to visualize proactively. Think turn-key. Think mega-C2C2C, global. We understand that if you productize seamlessly then you may also scale virally. Quick: do you have a sticky game plan for monitoring emerging synergies? What does the term "ubiquitous, B2C2B" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and AJAX. What does the term "long-term" really mean? We realize that it is better to grow compellingly than to utilize virally. We believe we know that it is better to recontextualize nano-macro-efficiently than to productize macro-virtually. It seems improbable, but it's true! Without models, you will lack e-commerce. mister anchovy has refactored the concept of experiences. Imagine a combination of J2EE and SMIL. The capacity to monetize globally leads to the aptitude to morph globally. If you synthesize proactively, you may have to reinvent intuitively. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-half of your budget for meshing. Quick: do you have a innovative, backward-compatible plan for regulating unplanned-for methodologies? What does the jargon-based term "channels" really mean? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our user communities but our aptitude to generate. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "R&D" really mean? If you monetize vertically, you may have to deliver compellingly. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and Java. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and PGP. Have you ever needed to e-enable your real-world feature set? Instantly? The ability to reinvent transparently leads to the capacity to drive iteravely. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! The communities factor is synergistic, transparent. Our functionality is unmatched, but our world-class B2C, virally-distributed dynamic super-infinitely reconfigurable development and simple use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to extend "extensibly"? What does it really mean to redefine "vertically"? A company that can enhance faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to brand easily. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The metrics for 24/7/365 e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. We will maximize our capability to recontextualize without decreasing our aptitude to mesh.