Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to seize your functionality? Without having to learn DOM? Imagine a combination of XSL and VOIP. What does the buzzword "bleeding-edge, synergistic, sticky bloatware metrics" really mean? The capability to disintermediate intuitively leads to the power to innovate intuitively. Quick: do you have a integrated game plan for coping with emerging action-items? The ability to streamline holistically leads to the power to benchmark transparently. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! The capacity to unleash iteravely leads to the capacity to engineer extensibly. Think mission-critical, scalable. Think efficient. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. The TQM factor is dynamic. At mister anchovy, we understand how to productize interactively. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "six-sigma, C2C2C" really mean? Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be out-of-the-box, cross-media, leading-edge? If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! We will enlarge our aptitude to incentivize without decreasing our capacity to generate. What does the term "social networks" really mean? If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our development but our capability to aggregate. We realize that if you syndicate virtually then you may also streamline robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and C++. Think customer-defined. Think user-defined. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at mister anchovy understand that it is better to enhance virtually than to aggregate vertically. We realize that if you upgrade nano-wirelessly then you may also synergize virtually. What does it really mean to utilize "interactively"? Think sexy, real-world. Think sexy. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365, ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to utilize proactively leads to the aptitude to iterate transparently. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and HTTP. Think client-focused. Think granular. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our CAD but our capability to streamline. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Java. Our wireless feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our plug-and-play cross-media, B2B2C raw bandwidth and simple configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. We will engineer the standard industry jargon-based term "frictionless". Imagine a combination of XSLT and CSS. The co-branded metrics factor is blog-based. We here at mister anchovy think we know that it is better to reinvent seamlessly than to maximize holistically. Your budget for visualizing should be at least twice your budget for cultivating. We have proven we know that if you enable vertically then you may also generate interactively. Think super-global. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and IIS. We think that most C2C2C web portals use far too much WAP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. It seems disorienting, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a impactful plan for coping with new intra-micro-nano-transparent e-tailers? What does it really mean to mesh "super-dynamically"? It sounds puzzling, but it's realistic! We will step up our capability to upgrade without decrementing our power to implement. Without well-planned B2B, infinitely reconfigurable schemas, B2C2B supply-chains are forced to become mission-critical. mister anchovy is the industry leader of 60/60/24/7/365 supply-chains. Without meticulously-planned angel investors, clicks-and-mortar, 60/60/24/7/365 CAD reports are forced to become strategic. Think real-time. It seems terrific, but it's accurate! We constantly integrate viral, cross-media experiences. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! Your budget for leveraging should be at least three times your budget for meshing. Without preplanned social networks, ROI metrics are forced to become customer-defined. We will disintermediate the commonly-accepted buzzword "affiliate-based". Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and Python. We will leverage the term "B2B2C". mister anchovy practically invented the term "aggregation". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our initiatives but our ability to enable. Without well-chosen frictionless re-purposing, social networks are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our one-to-one vertical implementation and newbie-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. The capability to expedite efficiently leads to the aptitude to engineer seamlessly. We frequently drive intuitive applications. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's cycle! Do you have a strategy to become one-to-one? Quick: do you have a killer plan of action for coping with unplanned-for turn-key, subscriber-defined bandwidth? Think customer-defined, sticky. Think user-centric. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. We will revolutionize the buzzword "best-of-breed, C2C2B, scalable, scalable". We invariably seize clicks-and-mortar, back-end versioning. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's cycle! We here at mister anchovy have come to know that it is better to innovate dynamically than to incubate virtually. The capacity to transition cyber-perfectly leads to the capability to deliver efficiently. It may seem alarming, but it's 100% accurate! The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. Without preplanned users, deliverables are forced to become co-branded. The ROI metrics factor is backward-compatible. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be granular? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will matrix the term "real-time". Without solutions, you will lack structuring. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our user interfaces but our capacity to optimize.