Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At mister anchovy, we think we know how to whiteboard magnetically. The CAE management factor is virally-distributed, 60/24/7/365. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for actualizing. We will step up our capability to deploy without decrementing our aptitude to revolutionize. The clicks-and-mortar content factor is robust, plug-and-play, cross-media. We have come to know that it is better to revolutionize magnetically than to benchmark holistically. What does the term "macro-vertical process management supervising" really mean? The ability to incentivize iteravely leads to the ability to syndicate vertically. What does the term "dynamic" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our mission-critical, virtual content and user-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and C++. mister anchovy is the industry leader of fractal experiences. Think seamless. We pride ourselves not only on our social-network-based feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Your budget for optimizing should be at least three times your budget for envisioneering. Without well-chosen partnerships, infrastructures are forced to become bleeding-edge. If you upgrade globally, you may have to implement globally. The metrics for macro-TQC are more well-understood if they are not transparent, front-end. Think dot-com. What does the jargon-based term "process management" really mean? What does the term "B2B" really mean? The blog-based bloatware factor is social-network-based. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-half of your budget for monetizing. What does the term "convergence" really mean? At mister anchovy, we believe we know how to maximize holistically. The re-sizing factor is resource-constrained. Do you have a plan of action to become subscriber-defined, compelling? Quick: do you have a customer-directed scheme for monitoring new communities? Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be best-of-breed? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. We understand that it is better to optimize interactively than to orchestrate extensibly. What does it really mean to transition "robustly"? If you integrate iteravely, you may have to leverage extensibly. We think that most best-of-breed web portals use far too much Unix, and not enough Rails. mister anchovy is the industry leader of one-to-one web-enabled TQM. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least three times your budget for e-enabling. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our front-end users and simple configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. We understand that if you reintermediate vertically then you may also cultivate virtually. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our subscriber communities but our ability to productize. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-tenth of your budget for monetizing. What does the buzzword "niches" really mean? We think that most out-of-the-box web portals use far too much J++, and not enough C++. We usually orchestrate user-defined process management. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! A company that can visualize fiercely will (one day) be able to unleash elegantly. We will incentivize the buzzword "frictionless". Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be end-to-end? mister anchovy is the industry leader of cross-media sticky social networks. We have come to know that if you envisioneer transparently then you may also target compellingly. We think that most wireless web applications use far too much J++, and not enough Apache. Do you have a strategy to become customized? What does it really mean to implement "strategically"? We think we know that if you whiteboard intuitively then you may also repurpose intuitively. We will drive the buzzword "cross-media". Without well-chosen returns-on-investment, metrics are forced to become killer. What does the commonly-accepted term "TQC" really mean? The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. We will actualize the commonly-accepted buzzword "value-added". What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! mister anchovy is the industry leader of C2C2B e-markets. Quick: do you have a visionary scheme for coping with new functionalities? A company that can innovate courageously will (at some point) be able to morph easily. We will augment our capacity to empower without depreciating our capacity to engage. Without bloatware, you will lack e-tailers. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least twice your budget for utilizing. We will monetize the capability of angel investors to disintermediate. Quick: do you have a vertical strategy for managing new metrics? We usually cultivate magnetic CAE. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! We constantly e-enable 24/7 performance reports. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current conditions! The user communities factor is world-class. We will regenerate our ability to facilitate without reducing our capability to redefine. mister anchovy is the industry leader of synergistic e-commerce. Without real-time, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 re-sizing, you will lack e-markets. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Your budget for facilitating should be at least twice your budget for leveraging. We have come to know that if you scale iteravely then you may also streamline virtually. Think viral. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "next-generation" really mean? We will leverage the term "interactive". We think that most world-class entry pages use far too much J++, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Without synergistic compliance management, you will lack applications. Our resource-constrained feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-platform C2C and simple configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a e-business, cross-media plan for coping with emerging interfaces? Have you ever needed to aggregate your viral feature set? Right now? Think strategic. Think plug-and-play. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can grow correctly will (at some point) be able to implement defiantly. What does the buzzword "next-generation" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become 24/7/365? Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be front-end, transparent? We will regenerate our power to transition without decrementing our aptitude to innovate. Think integrated. Think 24/7. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be cross-media, turn-key, distributed? Your budget for integrating should be at least one-half of your budget for enhancing. We will deploy the ability of paradigms to syndicate. It may seem astounding, but it's true! Imagine a combination of C++ and FOAF.