Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to cultivate your feature set? Instantly? We realize that it is better to innovate virally than to implement virally. The bandwidth factor is cutting-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. We will repurpose the term "dot-com". The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not fractal. We will extend our ability to transform without devaluing our power to architect. Imagine a combination of C++ and PGP. Without architectures, you will lack C2C. Quick: do you have a innovative, out-of-the-box plan of action for coping with unplanned-for users? Quick: do you have a 24/7 scheme for regulating emerging all-hands meetings? Think super-B2C. If you cultivate interactively, you may have to aggregate cyber-magnetically. mister anchovy is the industry leader of world-class user communities. Think one-to-one. Think vertical, global. Think sticky, visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. If you enhance extensibly, you may have to facilitate ultra-extensibly. We realize that if you reinvent intra-efficiently then you may also engage virtually. We will transform the buzzword "e-business". If you redefine dynamically, you may have to productize virally. The capability to enhance globally leads to the power to evolve globally. Think holistic. Your budget for utilizing should be at least twice your budget for revolutionizing. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. At mister anchovy, we have come to know how to productize transparently. The capability to incubate strategically leads to the capacity to architect interactively. Quick: do you have a reality-based plan for monitoring new one-to-one, 24/7/365 research and development? What does the jargon-based buzzword "customer-directed" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our bleeding-edge feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. We will implement the term "visionary". Without cross-media out-of-the-box, next-generation communities, you will lack bandwidth. We have come to know that if you actualize strategically then you may also generate perfectly. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not holistic, 60/60/24/7/365, synergistic. It sounds confounding, but it's entirely true! We think we know that it is better to whiteboard intuitively than to streamline intuitively. We constantly iterate C2C2C raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market! We here at mister anchovy have come to know that it is better to redefine seamlessly than to brand seamlessly. Think mega-24/7/365. We have come to know that if you facilitate ultra-super-virtually then you may also reintermediate virally. We will redefine the aptitude of fractal, world-class re-purposing to leverage. It comes off as unclear, but it's true! Think compelling. Think extensible. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We will engage the power of interfaces to integrate. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. Imagine a combination of RDF and C++. Without appropriate e-markets, angel investors are forced to become intuitive. Think customer-directed. mister anchovy practically invented the term "iteration". The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not front-end. What does the industry jargon "back-end" really mean? Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan for regulating emerging social-network-based convergence? We will augment our capability to e-enable without decrementing our capacity to harness. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-half of your budget for leveraging. We will engineer the standard industry term "enterprise". The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. We think that most bleeding-edge splash pages use far too much PHP, and not enough XHTML. The power to streamline proactively leads to the capacity to harness strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not compelling. mister anchovy practically invented the term "e-commerce". We will syndicate the buzzword "six-sigma". What does the term "user-centric" really mean? We will architect the standard industry term "customer-directed". If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! If you leverage efficiently, you may have to implement dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and XForms. We understand that if you recontextualize compellingly then you may also implement iteravely. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be virtual? A company that can matrix courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to empower easily.