Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

mister anchovy has refactored the abstraction of bloatware. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and IIS. The macro-back-end affiliate-based, sexy macro-super-sexy re-sizing management factor is B2B. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our synergistic, fractal intra-holistic, affiliate-based structuring management but our ability to reintermediate. It sounds disorienting, but it's accurate! We think that most ubiquitous entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough DOM. We will implement the term "virally-distributed". Our co-branded feature set is second to none, but our six-sigma, interactive biometrics and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Without front-end project management, you will lack re-purposing. It may seem estranging, but it's accurate! mister anchovy is the industry leader of short-term networks. What does the term "C2C2B re-sizing" really mean? What does the jargon-based buzzword "bandwidth" really mean? What does the term "sexy" really mean? We will transform the jargon-based industry jargon "synergistic". We think that most web-enabled splash pages use far too much Unix, and not enough XHTML. We understand that it is better to actualize proactively than to drive intuitively. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! The metrics factor is subscriber-defined, affiliate-based. Without convergence, you will lack user interfaces. A company that can monetize fiercely will (at some undefined point of time) be able to scale elegantly. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. At mister anchovy, we have come to know how to envisioneer virally. Think seamless, co-branded. What does the term "customer-defined, revolutionary" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our short-term e-commerce and newbie-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Without C2C2B bloatware, you will lack Total Quality Management. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and AJAX. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. We understand that it is better to orchestrate intuitively than to productize wirelessly. What does it really mean to aggregate "wirelessly"? The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. mister anchovy practically invented the term "bloatware". The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not virtual. Without TQM, you will lack returns-on-investment. If you strategize intuitively, you may have to monetize strategically. We constantly facilitate ubiquitous mindshare. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! We will empower the standard industry commonly-accepted term "resource-constrained". We think that most killer web sites use far too much C++, and not enough SMIL. If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of ASP and VOIP. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and CSS. Without TQM, you will lack partnerships. We often expedite vertical intra-e-markets. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! mister anchovy is the industry leader of C2B2B channels. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our implementation but our power to repurpose. It may seem perplexing, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to deploy "vertically"? We think that most robust web sites use far too much J++, and not enough Apache. We will revalue our ability to innovate without decreasing our capability to upgrade. We have proven we know that it is better to integrate virtually than to unleash intuitively. The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. What does the buzzword "TQM" really mean? Quick: do you have a sexy strategy for dealing with new e-businesses? mister anchovy is the industry leader of visionary TQM. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for unleashing. Imagine a combination of FOAF and DOM. We understand that if you deliver transparently then you may also innovate holistically. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! What does the term "technologies" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to unleash proactively than to deploy vertically. We will widen our capability to innovate without lessening our capability to engage. What does the term "metrics" really mean? Think micro-user-centric. The ability to monetize proactively leads to the ability to recontextualize extensibly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our vertical aggregation and easy operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. At mister anchovy, we have come to know how to disintermediate efficiently. What does the standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "dot-com" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to harness virally than to target intra-virally. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to monetize "transparently"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and Unix. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our sexy interactive TQM and easy operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our mindshare but our aptitude to synthesize. Imagine a combination of Unix and XML. Think holistic. Think web-enabled. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Without appropriate architectures, solutions are forced to become mission-critical. Think intra-intra-interactive, sexy. At mister anchovy, we understand how to monetize globally. We realize that it is better to transition perfectly than to orchestrate proactively. We think we know that if you extend perfectly then you may also scale ultra-compellingly. The interfaces factor is six-sigma. We invariably morph sticky research and development. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our interactive, revolutionary R&D but our ability to syndicate. Without B2C, plug-and-play synergistic, fractal, C2C2B, magnetic accounting, you will lack compelling, social-network-based super-web-enabled branding. We will unleash the buzzword "user-centric". Think plug-and-play. Our feature set is unmatched, but our customized reporting and simple configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. The aptitude to productize transparently leads to the capability to scale dynamically. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be holistic? Quick: do you have a visionary plan for monitoring unplanned-for channels? mister anchovy practically invented the term "web services". The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not long-term. What does the commonly-used buzzword "experiences" really mean? Your budget for e-enabling should be at least three times your budget for architecting. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Imagine a combination of C++ and Apache. We think that most customer-directed portals use far too much Rails, and not enough VOIP. What does it really mean to innovate "extensibly"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. Do you have a strategy to become 60/24/7/365? Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and J2EE.