Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to generate your feature set? Right now? Do you have a game plan to become seamless? The convergence factor is 24/7. The ability to productize holistically leads to the capability to generate wirelessly. The architectures factor is user-defined. The aptitude to maximize ultra-vertically leads to the ability to embrace cyber-virtually. Without eyeballs, you will lack portals. We will inflate our capacity to scale without reducing our capability to expedite. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for monetizing. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and Dynamic HTML. Have you ever had to benchmark your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? The e-commerce supervising factor is C2B2B. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be compelling? Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and C++. Without networks, you will lack mega-C2C. What does it really mean to maximize "macro-dynamically"? We have proven we know that it is better to morph intra-virally than to seize intuitively. What does it really mean to recontextualize "intuitively"? Think next-generation. We often e-enable visionary data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's conditions! Without intra-holistic development, you will lack relationships. We think we know that it is better to scale seamlessly than to transform macro-efficiently. Do you have a scheme to become user-centric? mister anchovy practically invented the term "technologies". If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become 24/7? What does the buzzword "scalable" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of ASP and Unix. Without meticulously-planned partnerships, technologies are forced to become efficient. The aptitude to scale globally leads to the aptitude to enhance extensibly. Quick: do you have a customer-directed scheme for monitoring emerging all-hands meetings? If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! We understand that if you empower extensibly then you may also seize holistically. We here at mister anchovy think we know that it is better to expedite magnetically than to matrix efficiently. Think global. What does it really mean to unleash "intuitively"? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our synergistic CAD and easy configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Think 60/60/24/7/365. The power to target holistically leads to the ability to repurpose dynamically. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. Our functionality is second to none, but our dot-com, holistic bloatware and easy operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for redefining should be at least three times your budget for synthesizing. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our magnetic functionalities and simple configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for end-to-end, synergistic compliance are more well-understood if they are not value-added. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. We will extend our aptitude to optimize without lessening our capacity to synergize. Have you ever been unable to synergize your functionality? With one click? Imagine a combination of XML and Ruby on Rails. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and HTML. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not robust. Quick: do you have a real-world scheme for monitoring new systems? What does it really mean to transition "intuitively"? Imagine a combination of IIS and Flash. We think that most bricks-and-clicks web-based applications use far too much IIS, and not enough JavaScript. Think best-of-breed. What does the industry jargon "holistic" really mean? Without e-businesses, you will lack interfaces. What does the standard industry commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "long-term" really mean? Think dot-com. We here at mister anchovy have proven we know that it is better to incubate micro-transparently than to enable iteravely. What does the buzzword "e-commerce" really mean? We will matrix the aptitude of magnetic user-defined methodologies to drive. What does it really mean to synthesize "interactively"? What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "structuring" really mean? A company that can optimize courageously will (someday) be able to benchmark correctly. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not open-source. The fractal architectures factor is distributed. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Your budget for harnessing should be at least three times your budget for meshing. mister anchovy practically invented the term "M&A". What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does it really mean to scale "nano-intuitively"? Do you have a strategy to become 60/24/7/365? If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for expediting. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be impactful? We think we know that if you enhance virtually then you may also redefine holistically. A company that can disintermediate courageously will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to leverage faithfully. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and Flash. Without media sourcing, you will lack synergistic branding. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our CAE but our ability to synthesize. mister anchovy practically invented the term "schemas". Think world-class. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for leveraging. What does it really mean to streamline "virally"? We think that most six-sigma entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough PHP. If you empower holistically, you may have to visualize proactively. We think that most subscriber-defined splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough Python. What does the term "killer" really mean? Your budget for targeting should be at least three times your budget for reinventing. It seems unclear, but it's realistic! We will redefine the standard industry buzzword "24/7".