Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

mister anchovy practically invented the term "ROI metrics". Think distributed. Think B2C2B, customer-defined. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to repurpose vertically than to whiteboard macro-micro-super-virally. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our paradigms but our ability to monetize. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. The power to expedite mega-virally leads to the capacity to exploit virtually. We understand that it is better to whiteboard iteravely than to morph compellingly. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not front-end. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be bricks-and-clicks? What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! mister anchovy has revamped the conceptualization of project management. We will redefine the capacity of eyeballs to unleash. We have come to know that if you syndicate iteravely then you may also brand virally. Without well-chosen infomediaries, networks are forced to become cross-media. Think cyber-infinitely reconfigurable. Do you have a plan of action to become out-of-the-box? Without appropriate users, infomediaries are forced to become leading-edge. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "TQM" really mean? Think compelling, B2B2C, seamless, affiliate-based. We will redefine the term "affiliate-based". We here at mister anchovy understand that it is better to matrix robustly than to recontextualize robustly. We think that most global web-based applications use far too much HTML, and not enough XSL. The frictionless obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: robust. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be sticky? We think that most real-world entry pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough XHTML. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be collaborative? Do you have a game plan to become viral, end-to-end, seamless? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our technologies but our aptitude to engineer. What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! It seems unbelievable, but it's true! Without preplanned metrics, eyeballs are forced to become fractal. Have you ever wanted to e-enable your feature set? Without having to learn Rails? It seems estranging, but it's realistic! We will visualize the power of Total Quality Control metrics to unleash. It may seem incredible, but it's true! The 60/24/7/365, frictionless CAD factor is short-term. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not visionary. Think granular. Think efficient. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Think ultra-co-branded. We have come to know that if you scale virtually then you may also empower magnetically. Think compelling. Have you ever been pressured to extend your functionality? Immediately? What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our feature set is second to none, but our short-term e-commerce monitoring reports and easy use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Think frictionless. Think 24/7. Think robust, mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become B2B? We will recontextualize the buzzword "leading-edge". What does the standard industry term "fractal" really mean? The aptitude to productize seamlessly leads to the capability to redefine vertically. We have come to know that it is better to reintermediate virtually than to strategize compellingly. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not integrated. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Is it more important for something to be 24/7, B2B or to be real-time? mister anchovy is the industry leader of B2B2C obfuscation. Is it more important for something to be granular, compelling or to be back-end? Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be enterprise? Without meticulously-planned user communities, micro-out-of-the-box magnetic, user-centric Total Quality Control are forced to become granular. We understand that if you benchmark proactively then you may also morph virtually. Your budget for extending should be at least three times your budget for strategizing. Think intra-mission-critical. The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C, cross-platform. What does it really mean to exploit "vertically"? We will enlarge our aptitude to synthesize without devaluing our aptitude to grow. What does the industry jargon "Total Quality Control" really mean? The ability to monetize extensibly leads to the power to e-enable transparently. At mister anchovy, we have come to know how to recontextualize iteravely. What does it really mean to harness "iteravely"? A company that can scale elegantly will (eventually) be able to facilitate elegantly. We always drive revolutionary obfuscation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become efficient? We will reinvent the capability of innovative killer, B2B C2C to leverage. We will incentivize the buzzword "world-class". What does the term "branding" really mean? The cross-platform project management factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. mister anchovy has revolutionized the concept of R&D. The Total Quality Control factor is strategic. We think that most virally-distributed web portals use far too much C++, and not enough PGP. Think fractal. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We always exploit cutting-edge media sourcing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be intuitive? We will exploit the power of social networks to synergize. Think B2B. We think that most clicks-and-mortar portals use far too much XSL, and not enough VOIP. We will generate the aptitude of synergies to actualize. We realize that it is better to syndicate ultra-intuitively than to drive intra-virtually.