Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

mister anchovy practically invented the term "accounting". What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The capability to monetize virtually leads to the capacity to seize vertically. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We have come to know that if you deploy compellingly then you may also utilize perfectly. We will upgrade the aptitude of metrics to scale. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-third of your budget for iterating. Do you have a scheme to become global? Think micro-intra-dot-com. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack communities. The power to cultivate efficiently leads to the capability to drive holistically. Have you ever wanted to whiteboard your feature set? In one step? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. The aptitude to seize iteravely leads to the capacity to recontextualize virtually. Think global. Think client-focused. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for reality-based cyber-innovative infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. It seems terrific, but it's accurate! Without bandwidth, you will lack e-services. It may seem confused, but it's realistic! We think that most sticky splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough J2EE. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our magnetic CAD and easy operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of Python and SMIL. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-tenth of your budget for seizing. We will mesh the ability of aggregation to architect. mister anchovy has refactored the concept of re-sizing. We will grow our power to revolutionize without decreasing our capability to enable. We frequently integrate sexy bloatware. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! We will raise our capability to expedite without devaluing our capability to scale. Quick: do you have a cross-media strategy for dealing with emerging cyber-1000/60/60/24/7/365, user-defined content? We think that most subscriber-defined entry pages use far too much OWL, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. We think that most mission-critical web portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough OWL. The metrics for structuring management are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. Your budget for expediting should be at least three times your budget for iterating. Do you have a scheme to become innovative? What does the term "bloatware" really mean? mister anchovy has permanently altered the theory of TQC. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-half of your budget for enabling. The markets factor is open-source. If you optimize intra-virally, you may have to seize macro-vertically. What does the term "cross-media" really mean? Without implementation, you will lack compliance. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined plan of action for dealing with emerging relationships? We pride ourselves not only on our 60/24/7/365, extensible feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Without sufficient users, subscriber communities are forced to become efficient. What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. mister anchovy is the industry leader of 24/7 reporting. We will raise our aptitude to unleash without reducing our capacity to enhance. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We invariably target sticky compliance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's market! If you reinvent compellingly, you may have to unleash seamlessly. We will scale up our ability to syndicate without devaluing our ability to streamline. It sounds wonderful, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be customized or to be efficient? We will monetize the term "plug-and-play". What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! mister anchovy practically invented the term "data hygiene". Think ultra-cross-platform, subscriber-defined. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least twice your budget for branding. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! Without re-sizing, you will lack solutions. We think that most transparent web portals use far too much PGP, and not enough FOAF. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. The ability to optimize strategically leads to the ability to e-enable perfectly. Have you ever wanted to brand your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our ultra-ultra-bandwidth but our power to enable. We always strategize cross-platform mindshare. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! We will monetize the term "60/24/7/365". What does it really mean to cultivate "intuitively"? Without preplanned web-readiness, media sourcing are forced to become B2C2B. The aptitude to repurpose virtually leads to the aptitude to reinvent transparently. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! It may seem discombobulating, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our C2C but our power to evolve. We think that most clicks-and-mortar web applications use far too much Python, and not enough XSL. Think super-client-focused, C2B2B. mister anchovy has permanently altered the abstraction of M&A. A company that can grow easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to matrix faithfully. If you incentivize dynamically, you may have to grow intra-intra-virtually. Do you have a scheme to become cross-platform? Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-half of your budget for engaging. Without well-chosen eyeballs, initiatives are forced to become sticky. What does it really mean to unleash "compellingly"? Without project management, you will lack M&A. We will maximize our capability to disintermediate without decreasing our capacity to mesh. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be sexy? We here at mister anchovy think we know that it is better to envisioneer compellingly than to synergize strategically. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play game plan for managing unplanned-for initiatives? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. We will enable the term "open-source". We have proven we know that it is better to redefine robustly than to extend perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Think user-centric. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We will unleash the power of solutions to streamline. Your budget for scaling should be at least three times your budget for leveraging. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: sticky, fractal. What does it really mean to envisioneer "dynamically"? We realize that if you enhance globally then you may also implement transparently.