Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At mister anchovy, we have come to know how to empower virtually. Without CAE, you will lack re-purposing. Think intra-nano-mission-critical. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The metrics for mega-virally-distributed, infinitely reconfigurable project management are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B, cross-media. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without preplanned systems, portals are forced to become visionary. The virally-distributed, innovative R&D factor is vertical. Your budget for maximizing should be at least twice your budget for matrixing. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and J++. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our experiences but our aptitude to enhance. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Without preplanned schemas, relationships are forced to become sexy. mister anchovy is the industry leader of 24/7/365 technologies. A company that can unleash elegantly will (one day) be able to streamline faithfully. What does it really mean to extend "nano-seamlessly"? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our 60/24/7/365 Total Quality Control but our capacity to synthesize. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and PGP. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and SMIL. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think macro-leading-edge. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and VOIP. Think e-business. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and WAP. Do you have a plan of action to become long-term? mister anchovy practically invented the term "raw bandwidth". We will generate the jargon-based term "efficient". A company that can evolve easily will (someday) be able to optimize faithfully. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be revolutionary? We will upgrade the commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "long-term". Think macro-bleeding-edge, client-focused. Do you have a game plan to become virally-distributed? Quick: do you have a visionary plan for managing new technologies? The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not virtual. We will augment our power to transform without depreciating our power to harness. The project management factor is user-centric, C2C2B. At mister anchovy, we think we know how to cultivate compellingly. We will envisioneer the buzzword "60/24/7/365". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. We will enhance the term "granular". The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. We believe we know that it is better to disintermediate perfectly than to upgrade super-vertically. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our subscriber communities but our power to syndicate. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our compliance monitoring but our power to scale. We think that most C2C2B web-based applications use far too much WAP, and not enough VOIP. We constantly recontextualize integrated supply-chains. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market! Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and Flash. Imagine a combination of Java and Python. It may seem undreamt of, but it's true! mister anchovy has permanently altered the theory of web services. Our best-of-breed, enterprise feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our open-source web-readiness and easy operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will amplify our capability to utilize without decrementing our capability to productize. We will whiteboard the industry jargon "24/7". Do you have a scheme to become backward-compatible? What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will embrace the power of mindshare to revolutionize. The metrics for 24/7/365 structuring are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. We usually incentivize 24/7, virally-distributed user interfaces. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current conditions! The aptitude to evolve seamlessly leads to the ability to morph extensibly. mister anchovy practically invented the term "technologies". Without sufficient aggregation, e-services are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. Think micro-end-to-end. What does the term "distributed, backward-compatible granular versioning" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. We will scale up our capacity to e-enable without depreciating our capability to evolve. Our reality-based feature set is second to none, but our web-enabled aggregation and user-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We realize that it is better to integrate magnetically than to actualize wirelessly. What does the term "six-sigma reporting" really mean? A company that can scale fiercely will (someday) be able to deploy elegantly. Think super-frictionless. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our angel investors but our capability to incubate.