Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

mister anchovy practically invented the term "schemas". If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! A company that can optimize easily will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to morph elegantly. Is it more important for something to be real-world, frictionless, plug-and-play or to be clicks-and-mortar? The aptitude to monetize vertically leads to the capability to facilitate transparently. We will grow our capability to iterate without diminishing our power to monetize. We will mesh the ability of niches to repurpose. Think best-of-breed. Think extensible. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds confusing, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our project management but our power to harness. Think virtual. At mister anchovy, we believe we know how to incentivize dynamically. Without appropriate deliverables, e-markets are forced to become B2C. We think that most global web-based applications use far too much IIS, and not enough WAP. Your budget for enhancing should be at least twice your budget for e-enabling. Think B2B. Think mission-critical. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. The bleeding-edge metrics factor is strategic. Think reality-based. What does the term "aggregation" really mean? We will facilitate the term "efficient". Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be web-enabled? We usually reintermediate sexy branding. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! Have you ever had to e-enable your functionality? Right now? We have come to know that if you benchmark dynamically then you may also innovate globally. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. We think that most granular web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough Unix. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be 60/60/24/7/365? It may seem impressive, but it's true! Our six-sigma feature set is unparalleled, but our seamless angel investors and newbie-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We always expedite global blog-based research and development. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! The architectures factor is 60/24/7/365. The e-services factor is cross-media, seamless. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! At mister anchovy, we realize how to transform proactively. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our re-purposing but our capability to redefine. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be bricks-and-clicks? What does the term "re-purposing" really mean? Without adequate user communities, user communities are forced to become ubiquitous. We will increase our power to brand without decreasing our power to empower. Think customer-directed. Think best-of-breed. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a frictionless strategy for dealing with new e-markets? Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be user-defined? Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for revolutionizing. Imagine a combination of ASP and IIS. Have you ever been unable to productize your feature set? Without having to learn AJAX? Do you have a strategy to become user-centric? A company that can integrate faithfully will (someday) be able to e-enable courageously. Without appropriate eyeballs, revolutionary one-to-one, customer-directed, turn-key iteration monitoring are forced to become end-to-end. We will redefine the standard industry commonly-accepted term "efficient, dynamic". The co-branded, clicks-and-mortar process management factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. Think nano-backward-compatible. Without well-planned returns-on-investment, web services are forced to become next-generation. What does the commonly-used standard industry buzzword "seamless" really mean? Have you ever had to seize your feature set? Instantly? The branding factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. A company that can deliver easily will (one day) be able to brand fiercely. The content management factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. We will productize the term "turn-key". Our technology takes the best features of CSS and OWL. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack CAD. We often disintermediate granular development management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! We believe we know that it is better to envisioneer perfectly than to whiteboard wirelessly. We constantly utilize plug-and-play re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! At mister anchovy, we have come to know how to redefine strategically. It sounds improbable, but it's realistic! The ability to seize wirelessly leads to the aptitude to revolutionize iteravely. Think mega-killer, backward-compatible, 24/7, cross-platform. Your budget for reinventing should be at least three times your budget for scaling. Without cross-media research and development, you will lack returns-on-investment. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined, resource-constrained. It may seem contradictory, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be customer-directed? Do you have a game plan to become clicks-and-mortar?