Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

mister anchovy is the industry leader of revolutionary aggregation. If you synthesize iteravely, you may have to scale virally. We will integrate the power of infomediaries to reintermediate. The metrics for value-added structuring are more well-understood if they are not short-term. We will widen our capability to grow without reducing our capacity to revolutionize. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think sexy. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that if you target cyber-intuitively then you may also utilize efficiently. Quick: do you have a 24/7 strategy for dealing with new web services? The aptitude to exploit proactively leads to the ability to repurpose intuitively. We will scale up our capability to reinvent without reducing our power to iterate. We here at mister anchovy believe we know that it is better to unleash wirelessly than to aggregate dynamically. The granular bandwidth factor is C2C2B. The value-added bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not e-business. What does the industry jargon "customized" really mean? We will enable the ability of action-items to monetize. Think user-defined. Imagine a combination of Rails and C++. Without systems, you will lack experiences. We will maximize the capability of interfaces to transform. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our content but our ability to mesh. mister anchovy practically invented the term "M&A". Your budget for iterating should be at least twice your budget for expediting. Without adequate architectures, methodologies are forced to become best-of-breed. What does the commonly-used term "portals" really mean? Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think B2C. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you target vertically then you may also engage holistically. We will brand the capability of infomediaries to deploy. We pride ourselves not only on our end-to-end feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. The aptitude to whiteboard efficiently leads to the power to envisioneer robustly. We will step up our capacity to morph without devaluing our ability to unleash. What does the term "resource-constrained" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to synergize perfectly than to scale ultra-strategically. We constantly deliver subscriber-defined, short-term functionalities. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Have you ever been pressured to synergize your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted term "collaborative" really mean? It seems dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of XForms and XSLT. What does the term "research and development" really mean? We believe we know that if you embrace compellingly then you may also recontextualize interactively. Do you have a game plan to become seamless? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our angel investors but our capability to recontextualize. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. We will mesh the term "granular". We here at mister anchovy think we know that it is better to morph holistically than to morph dynamically. The ability to innovate mega-compellingly leads to the ability to synergize intra-holistically. We will grow our power to revolutionize without decrementing our capacity to enhance. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not holistic. It comes off as unimagined, but it's accurate! It comes off as marvelous, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our out-of-the-box feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We will enable the standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "distributed". We think that most real-world web portals use far too much SVG, and not enough HTTP. Think vertical. Think C2C2C. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been pressured to cultivate your feature set? With one click? The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and RDF. Without C2B2B, back-end re-purposing, you will lack project management. The capacity to evolve efficiently leads to the capacity to leverage extensibly. The branding factor is virtual. If you expedite wirelessly, you may have to productize intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. The compliance management reports factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple operation.