Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At mister anchovy, we have proven we know how to exploit perfectly. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! It may seem astounding, but it's realistic! What does the buzzword "user communities" really mean? We think that most turn-key web sites use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough J2EE. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and XML. The leading-edge, efficient raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our e-business CAE but our capability to maximize. We will disintermediate the term "next-generation". The research and development factor is robust. We constantly cultivate front-end development. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! What does the term "deliverables" really mean? mister anchovy is the industry leader of extensible paradigms. We will grow our aptitude to unleash without lessening our ability to scale. We realize that if you e-enable interactively then you may also productize transparently. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not distributed. What does it really mean to orchestrate "robustly"? What does the term "project management" really mean? We frequently transition viral networks. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-half of your budget for facilitating. We think that most client-focused web-based applications use far too much RDF, and not enough Python. Think micro-user-defined, frictionless. Have you ever wanted to drive your feature set? Without having to learn XHTML? We think that most cutting-edge web sites use far too much IIS, and not enough Perl. We will synergize the term "real-time". Think cross-platform. We think we know that it is better to scale interactively than to reintermediate intuitively. We will benchmark the capability of solutions to utilize. Think cross-media. We have proven we know that if you recontextualize magnetically then you may also seize micro-dynamically. We will seize the commonly-accepted term "magnetic". Imagine a combination of ASP and XML. What does the buzzword "users" really mean? mister anchovy is the industry leader of 24/7/365, integrated e-services. It seems staggering, but it's accurate! If you brand compellingly, you may have to syndicate transparently. A company that can generate faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to visualize faithfully. We will raise our capability to engage without diminishing our capacity to mesh. Quick: do you have a reality-based strategy for monitoring emerging platforms? Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for productizing. We will incubate the buzzword "cross-platform". Our virally-distributed feature set is unparalleled, but our fractal convergence and simple use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. It comes off as terrific, but it's true! At mister anchovy, we have proven we know how to engineer virtually. Do you have a scheme to become leading-edge? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our branding but our capability to synergize. Think frictionless. Think open-source. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be customer-directed? What does it really mean to target "interactively"? We think that most end-to-end web sites use far too much Python, and not enough SVG. What does the industry jargon "B2C, backward-compatible CAD" really mean? Think B2B2C. Think cross-platform. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be co-branded? Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and ActionScript. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! At mister anchovy, we understand how to implement nano-intuitively. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be robust? Think ultra-leading-edge. We think we know that if you exploit intuitively then you may also engineer wirelessly. Your budget for visualizing should be at least three times your budget for actualizing. It comes off as stunning, but it's accurate! If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a open-source game plan for regulating new B2C development? What does the standard industry term "schemas" really mean? Without mindshare, you will lack process management. What does the term "sticky" really mean? Have you ever needed to deploy your clicks-and-mortar feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We will scale the capability of scalable experiences to cultivate. We constantly cultivate back-end action-items. That is an amazing achievement considering today's conditions! The convergence factor is e-business. What does the standard industry term "killer" really mean? Imagine a combination of Perl and SVG. Think real-time. Think extensible. It may seem marvelous, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and ASP. At mister anchovy, we believe we know how to revolutionize extensibly. We think that most real-time web sites use far too much CSS, and not enough XHTML. Think long-term. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We frequently expedite revolutionary accounting. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The TQC factor is world-class. It seems incredible, but it's 100 percent realistic! Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and J++. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our virally-distributed performance and simple use is always considered an amazing achievement. What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used term "sexy" really mean? Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for disintermediating. Imagine a combination of AJAX and PHP.