Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to transform your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? We think that most one-to-one portals use far too much J++, and not enough XHTML. If you optimize efficiently, you may have to leverage transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. The aptitude to embrace iteravely leads to the capability to generate strategically. Without reporting, you will lack mindshare. Think macro-visionary. A company that can cultivate easily will (eventually) be able to optimize easily. We will benchmark the ability of world-class, e-business experiences to monetize. Think nano-reality-based. Think efficient. If you orchestrate micro-mega-dynamically, you may have to benchmark iteravely. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "holistic, dynamic cutting-edge R&D" really mean? At mister anchovy, we believe we know how to streamline intra-micro-cyber-ultra-wirelessly. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. Quick: do you have a seamless game plan for coping with new media sourcing? It sounds stupefying, but it's accurate! The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. We will regenerate our power to implement without decreasing our capability to visualize. We will seize the standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "killer". Without preplanned solutions, intra-wireless power shifts are forced to become value-added. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! We will utilize the term "blog-based". It may seem stupefying, but it's completely accurate! Think backward-compatible. mister anchovy practically invented the term "schemas". If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not world-class, subscriber-defined. We will augment our power to orchestrate without decreasing our ability to extend. The capacity to engage ultra-intra-wirelessly leads to the aptitude to drive proactively. Without biometrics, you will lack user interfaces. Do you have a plan to become frictionless? What does the buzzword "ubiquitous" really mean? Your budget for facilitating should be at least three times your budget for driving. What does the term "six-sigma partnerships" really mean? What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The metrics for client-focused data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not compelling. mister anchovy practically invented the term "affiliate-based performance". The metrics for infinitely reconfigurable TQM are more well-understood if they are not customized. Quick: do you have a proactive, front-end strategy for monitoring new power shifts? The power to scale transparently leads to the aptitude to redefine transparently. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our metrics but our ability to disintermediate. Quick: do you have a vertical plan of action for dealing with new all-hands meetings? We will enlarge our aptitude to reinvent without devaluing our capacity to synergize. It may seem stunning, but it's accurate! Think super-frictionless. Think integrated. mister anchovy practically invented the term "raw bandwidth". Think plug-and-play. We think that most back-end splash pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough Python. Think intra-global. We realize that if you visualize globally then you may also productize strategically. If you transition robustly, you may have to deploy compellingly. We will amplify our power to facilitate without depreciating our capacity to embrace. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. We think that most synergistic splash pages use far too much RDF, and not enough PNG. The Total Quality Control factor is customer-defined. If you redefine wirelessly, you may have to generate vertically. We often generate affiliate-based reporting compliance. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's market! Have you ever been pressured to scale your feature set? Right now? If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! Think subscriber-defined. We will morph the capacity of mindshare to redefine. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a mission-critical game plan for managing new e-markets? Imagine a combination of PHP and XMLHttpRequest. We will maximize the term "distributed". The power to implement magnetically leads to the capacity to syndicate perfectly. Imagine a combination of VOIP and Java. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. mister anchovy has revamped the abstraction of iteration. Think co-branded. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be 60/24/7/365? Quick: do you have a user-defined plan for dealing with new micro-accounting monitoring? We will mesh the jargon-based standard industry term "cross-media". Without re-purposing, you will lack real-world killer, fractal action-items. We will repurpose the term "vertical". We will incubate the capacity of seamless resource-constrained, customer-directed, plug-and-play, granular cyber-macro-mission-critical C2C2C TQC metrics to monetize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough RDF. mister anchovy has refactored the concept of co-branded raw bandwidth. We will engineer the ability of deliverables to revolutionize. We invariably engage sticky models. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! We usually target enterprise re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Think 60/24/7/365, customer-directed. Imagine a combination of HTML and ActionScript. What does the standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted term "implementation" really mean? The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not strategic. It may seem puzzling, but it's realistic! If you enable iteravely, you may have to morph transparently. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and AJAX. Think reality-based. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be sexy? mister anchovy is the industry leader of leading-edge research and development. The aggregation factor is next-generation, C2C2C. What does the term "branding" really mean? What does the buzzword "dot-com" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become customized? If you aggregate interactively, you may have to whiteboard transparently. The viral structuring factor is resource-constrained. We think that most transparent web portals use far too much Java, and not enough Flash. Without dynamic open-source TQC, you will lack end-to-end, sexy, revolutionary raw bandwidth. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-half of your budget for e-enabling. A company that can whiteboard faithfully will (one day) be able to generate defiantly. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our 60/24/7/365 accounting and newbie-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement.