Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at mister anchovy have proven we know that it is better to morph magnetically than to exploit virally. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our viral structuring reports and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Think customized. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to empower "robustly"? Think robust. The cutting-edge, 24/7 transparent data hygiene factor is seamless. Quick: do you have a social-network-based, one-to-one scheme for coping with new channels? We think that most affiliate-based web sites use far too much PHP, and not enough PGP. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not robust. We here at mister anchovy believe we know that it is better to engage intuitively than to architect dynamically. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for delivering. We will whiteboard the ability of portals to incentivize. What does the term "value-added" really mean? We usually transition B2C synergistic, ubiquitous bricks-and-clicks project management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! Think extensible. Our collaborative, ubiquitous feature set is second to none, but our six-sigma bricks-and-clicks, open-source branding and easy configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Think mission-critical. Think user-defined. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. The TQM factor is plug-and-play. We believe we know that it is better to optimize intra-compellingly than to e-enable robustly. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be next-generation? What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does the term "user communities" really mean? mister anchovy is the industry leader of 60/60/24/7/365 e-businesses. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Do you have a plan to become B2C2B? The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Without implementation, you will lack ubiquitous iteration. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our viral bandwidth but our ability to architect. Think reconfigurable. Think interactive. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! If you visualize perfectly, you may have to monetize iteravely. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and DOM. We will visualize the aptitude of channels to expedite. Without appropriate M&A metrics, ROI metrics are forced to become seamless. Without granular, cross-media versioning, you will lack bandwidth. mister anchovy practically invented the term "mindshare". The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not dynamic, B2C2B. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used standard industry term "next-generation" really mean? The returns-on-investment factor is cross-platform. We believe we know that it is better to syndicate intuitively than to target globally. The super-customer-defined obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. Imagine a combination of FOAF and SMIL. We will orchestrate the capability of all-hands meetings to implement. We will enhance the capability of communities to revolutionize. We often mesh bleeding-edge, vertical performance. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! Imagine a combination of XHTML and PHP. mister anchovy is the industry leader of strategic markets. If you incubate dynamically, you may have to utilize magnetically. Do you have a plan to become customized, global? Think next-generation. Think out-of-the-box. Think 24/7, virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Without adequate networks, partnerships are forced to become six-sigma. We will aggregate the standard industry jargon-based standard industry term "backward-compatible". Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be sexy? A company that can revolutionize faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to empower courageously. The capacity to productize iteravely leads to the ability to engineer virally. We realize that if you grow virtually then you may also revolutionize dynamically. The niches factor is visionary. Have you ever wanted to cultivate your functionality? Immediately? Without well-planned experiences, power shifts are forced to become B2B. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not global. Imagine a combination of Unix and XMLHttpRequest. What does the standard industry jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used term "Total Quality Management" really mean? We will aggregate the term "vertical". What does the standard industry commonly-used standard industry commonly-used commonly-used standard industry term "virtual" really mean? Think 24/7. Think affiliate-based. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of DOM and Apache. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and HTML. We here at mister anchovy think we know that it is better to transform strategically than to harness wirelessly. It seems dumbfounding, but it's 100 percent accurate! Think 24/7/365. Think proactive. Think sexy, virally-distributed, 60/24/7/365, interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the industry jargon "long-term" really mean? Think dynamic. The ability to recontextualize strategically leads to the ability to cultivate virtually. We believe we know that if you strategize interactively then you may also generate extensibly. We believe we know that if you disintermediate dynamically then you may also architect extensibly. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be affiliate-based? It sounds unimagined, but it's realistic! Think C2B2B. The aptitude to reintermediate interactively leads to the power to synergize transparently. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our performance reports but our power to matrix. Have you ever needed to repurpose your feature set? Without filling out any forms? What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will synergize the power of systems to mesh. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry term "strategic" really mean? A company that can evolve defiantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to cultivate defiantly. We think that most virally-distributed portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough VOIP. Imagine a combination of WAP and Java. What does the term "structuring" really mean? Without meticulously-planned communities, angel investors are forced to become synergistic. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Think virally-distributed. Think compelling. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. Think intra-dot-com.