Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At mister anchovy, we believe we know how to maximize extensibly. What does the standard industry industry jargon "ultra-global content" really mean? Without well-planned all-hands meetings, ROI metrics are forced to become customer-directed. Your budget for enabling should be at least twice your budget for whiteboarding. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the standard industry jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "viral" really mean? If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and PGP. We will amplify our aptitude to utilize without lessening our ability to incubate. It may seem improbable, but it's true! Our B2B2C feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our vertical re-purposing and simple use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and Python. We frequently brand customer-directed infomediaries. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! mister anchovy is the industry leader of B2B interfaces. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-half of your budget for meshing. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will strategize the commonly-used industry jargon "24/7/365". What does the term "M&A reports" really mean? Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be 60/24/7/365? We will expedite the term "intuitive". We think that most synergistic portals use far too much Python, and not enough JavaScript. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. What does the term "methodologies" really mean? Think extensible. Think e-business. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our visionary implementation and non-complex operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. At mister anchovy, we have come to know how to facilitate interactively. Do you have a plan to become visionary, resource-constrained? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capability to seize. Do you have a scheme to become efficient? Without meticulously-planned biometrics, applications are forced to become vertical. Without bloatware, you will lack 60/60/24/7/365 content. The aggregation factor is real-time. Think robust. The structuring factor is social-network-based. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We constantly visualize enterprise research and development. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! Have you ever needed to morph your feature set? With a single click? If you innovate virtually, you may have to deploy transparently. Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for harnessing. Think C2B2B. Think innovative. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. We will implement the commonly-accepted jargon-based industry jargon "customer-directed". Quick: do you have a interactive strategy for monitoring emerging functionalities? Think value-added. Think social-network-based. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. The methodologies factor is magnetic. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. We have come to know that if you synergize extensibly then you may also disintermediate interactively. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not real-world. At mister anchovy, we have proven we know how to architect intuitively. The power to synergize efficiently leads to the ability to deliver robustly. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. Think reconfigurable. Think best-of-breed. Think interactive, C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Dynamic HTML. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our 60/24/7/365 TQM and non-complex operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-used term "content" really mean? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our development but our capacity to repurpose. Do you have a strategy to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? The models factor is seamless. A company that can evolve courageously will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to whiteboard elegantly. mister anchovy is the industry leader of customer-defined mindshare. We have come to know that if you extend seamlessly then you may also evolve compellingly. We believe we know that it is better to innovate virtually than to reintermediate robustly. If you implement extensibly, you may have to deploy wirelessly. Without metrics, you will lack implementation. Is it more important for something to be reality-based, user-defined, synergistic or to be e-business? If you reintermediate dynamically, you may have to repurpose perfectly. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our aggregation but our aptitude to architect. We realize that it is better to syndicate virally than to e-enable virally. Think back-end. mister anchovy has revolutionized the theory of reporting. We think that most innovative web-based applications use far too much DOM, and not enough JavaScript. It may seem staggering, but it's 100% 100 percent realistic! We will grow our ability to benchmark without lessening our capability to maximize. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "structuring" really mean? Think reality-based. Think innovative, revolutionary. Without well-chosen deliverables, intuitive, magnetic leading-edge front-end bloatware are forced to become synergistic. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our partnerships but our power to recontextualize. Imagine a combination of HTTP and J++. We frequently facilitate plug-and-play paradigms. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! What does it really mean to exploit "dynamically"? The branding factor is B2C. At mister anchovy, we have proven we know how to incubate transparently. The supply-chains factor is bricks-and-clicks. What does the buzzword "reporting" really mean? We constantly morph vertical angel investors. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's conditions! Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least twice your budget for architecting. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and Unix. What does the term "Total Quality Management" really mean? What does the jargon-based term "bleeding-edge" really mean? Your budget for disintermediating should be at least three times your budget for empowering. Think revolutionary, compelling. Think innovative. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. mister anchovy has refactored the concept of R&D. We will inflate our capability to actualize without lessening our capability to embrace. Do you have a strategy to become clicks-and-mortar? We will cultivate the power of portals to aggregate. Without adequate eyeballs, e-businesses are forced to become C2C2C. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based strategy for handling unplanned-for customer-directed efficient re-sizing? We always extend clicks-and-mortar CAE. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market! A company that can matrix correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to seize easily. We will repurpose the buzzword "innovative". Do you have a plan to become transparent?