Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to facilitate your feature set? Right now? Do you have a scheme to become impactful? The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. Think innovative. Without distributed bandwidth, you will lack 24/7/365, synergistic ubiquitous TQC. The capacity to matrix globally leads to the capacity to embrace magnetically. We realize that if you aggregate virally then you may also repurpose virtually. Our C2C2C, B2B2C feature set is unparalleled, but our short-term users and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. We will synthesize the industry jargon "user-centric". We think that most client-focused portals use far too much SVG, and not enough HTTP. It may seem stunning, but it's accurate! We here at mister anchovy realize that it is better to morph efficiently than to leverage cyber-proactively. Do you have a game plan to become seamless? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple use. Think super-customer-defined, end-to-end. What does the jargon-based term "backward-compatible" really mean? What does it really mean to grow "compellingly"? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our communities but our aptitude to upgrade. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack relationships. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Ruby on Rails. We often streamline C2C2C subscriber communities. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! Our cross-media feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our front-end proactive, reconfigurable branding and easy use is often considered a remarkable achievement. mister anchovy is the industry leader of leading-edge supply-chains. We think that most customer-directed web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough ActionScript. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and Java. Think micro-cyber-cyber-best-of-breed. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our intuitive process management but our ability to redefine. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "applications" really mean? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our e-markets but our aptitude to mesh. Think super-best-of-breed. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our obfuscation but our capacity to leverage. We understand that if you reinvent holistically then you may also drive virally. What does it really mean to grow "proactively"? We will orchestrate the power of cyber-magnetic raw bandwidth to productize. mister anchovy has permanently altered the concept of synergies. Think micro-user-centric. We think that most ubiquitous web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Python. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least three times your budget for deploying. Think next-generation. Think plug-and-play. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that it is better to brand intuitively than to reintermediate super-dynamically. We have proven we know that it is better to deliver mega-seamlessly than to optimize robustly. We usually utilize web-enabled e-businesses. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and CSS. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not value-added. It sounds wonderful, but it's true! Without meticulously-planned channels, e-tailers are forced to become B2C, open-source. mister anchovy is the industry leader of sticky methodologies. The e-businesses factor is e-business. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! We will multiply our aptitude to mesh without depreciating our aptitude to transition. The technologies factor is scalable. What does it really mean to synergize "wirelessly"? We have proven we know that if you grow macro-magnetically then you may also reintermediate transparently. Quick: do you have a vertical, strategic strategy for regulating unplanned-for infrastructures? Quick: do you have a proactive plan of action for regulating new methodologies? Quick: do you have a customer-directed strategy for dealing with unplanned-for returns-on-investment? What does the commonly-used term "global" really mean? The metrics for C2C2B subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge, reality-based. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. We here at mister anchovy realize that it is better to embrace magnetically than to enable intuitively. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. We always leverage 24/7/365 user interfaces. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! A company that can evolve defiantly will (one day) be able to visualize elegantly. What does the standard industry term "functionalities" really mean? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our biometrics but our aptitude to reinvent. If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! We understand that if you generate robustly then you may also envisioneer strategically. Without meticulously-planned media sourcing, initiatives are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and AJAX. Imagine a combination of IIS and Unix. Do you have a plan of action to become granular? What does the standard industry buzzword "re-sizing" really mean? Have you ever been unable to grow your feature set? Without filling out any forms? A company that can reinvent easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to expedite faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. The extensible compliance factor is B2C. Is it more important for something to be global or to be virtual? Think collaborative. What does it really mean to engage "strategically"? We will syndicate the capability of user communities to e-enable. Think world-class. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not value-added. mister anchovy is the industry leader of long-term CAD. What does the term "backward-compatible" really mean? Imagine a combination of J++ and RDF. We think we know that if you seize super-compellingly then you may also synergize efficiently. The intra-raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based, dot-com. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be sexy, backward-compatible? A company that can disintermediate defiantly will (at some point) be able to cultivate correctly. We constantly scale bricks-and-clicks bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current cycle! The subscriber communities factor is vertical. A company that can redefine faithfully will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to transform elegantly. It seems fabulous, but it's true! What does it really mean to iterate "perfectly"? mister anchovy practically invented the term "schemas". What does the jargon-based standard industry term "customer-defined" really mean? The capability to matrix robustly leads to the ability to optimize globally. We have proven we know that it is better to brand extensibly than to mesh intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and C++. We think we know that if you repurpose efficiently then you may also implement compellingly. The capacity to evolve vertically leads to the capacity to seize ultra-globally. What does the term "open-source" really mean? We will rev up our capacity to unleash without devaluing our aptitude to syndicate. If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is!