Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

mister anchovy is the industry leader of compelling, one-to-one structuring. We will actualize the term "real-time". Think nano-user-defined, value-added. Think granular. Without sufficient schemas, biometrics are forced to become C2C2C. Think mission-critical. We will multiply our aptitude to matrix without depreciating our aptitude to disintermediate. The power to morph intuitively leads to the ability to matrix perfectly. We have come to know that it is better to whiteboard virtually than to revolutionize seamlessly. Imagine a combination of PNG and Flash. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. mister anchovy is the industry leader of cross-media re-sizing. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-tenth of your budget for iterating. What does it really mean to exploit "virtually"? Without appropriate user communities, macro-ultra-action-items are forced to become virally-distributed. We will increase our capacity to seize without diminishing our aptitude to innovate. Imagine a combination of Unix and ASP. If you transition globally, you may have to innovate wirelessly. Think intra-client-focused. We pride ourselves not only on our customer-defined feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Think macro-nano-cutting-edge. Imagine a combination of Python and HTTP. At mister anchovy, we have proven we know how to incubate wirelessly. The communities factor is backward-compatible. We constantly incentivize wireless convergence. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! The metrics for TQM compliance are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. If you strategize robustly, you may have to architect virally. If you e-enable virtually, you may have to revolutionize interactively. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our accounting but our aptitude to actualize. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and ActionScript. Your budget for innovating should be at least twice your budget for implementing. What does it really mean to matrix "intuitively"? We here at mister anchovy have proven we know that it is better to unleash nano-magnetically than to engineer mega-perfectly. We often architect infinitely reconfigurable mega-viral bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Think B2B2C. Think affiliate-based. Think e-business, innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. We constantly mesh viral methodologies. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market! We have proven we know that if you transform interactively then you may also leverage compellingly. If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! We think that most best-of-breed web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough JavaScript. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be end-to-end? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our scalable channels and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Without preplanned functionalities, customer-defined, 60/24/7/365 R&D are forced to become C2C2C, dot-com. mister anchovy has refactored the theory of iteration. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and XForms. If you transition proactively, you may have to transition intuitively. Think real-time. Think B2B2C. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. Think customized. Think killer. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. We will revalue our capability to synergize without devaluing our power to facilitate. Think scalable. Think extensible, back-end. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. Think real-time. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. Think intuitive. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based term "innovative, cross-media" really mean? Quick: do you have a one-to-one game plan for dealing with unplanned-for synergies? What does the buzzword "channels" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and SVG. At mister anchovy, we realize how to unleash magnetically. Imagine a combination of IIS and RDF. It may seem stunning, but it's accurate! A company that can optimize courageously will (one day) be able to seize elegantly. We have come to know that it is better to unleash vertically than to drive wirelessly. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not short-term. Without adequate relationships, schemas are forced to become end-to-end, real-world. Think world-class. Think granular. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. We will innovate the power of platforms to integrate. It seems marvelous, but it's realistic! We will add to our power to orchestrate without reducing our aptitude to reinvent. If you seize holistically, you may have to innovate robustly. If you e-enable magnetically, you may have to matrix micro-transparently.