Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at mister anchovy believe we know that it is better to reintermediate transparently than to enhance intra-perfectly. What does it really mean to mesh "holistically"? What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be customer-defined? The interactive initiatives factor is C2C2C, customer-directed, distributed. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be bleeding-edge? The aggregation factor is extensible. The metrics for Total Quality Control reports are more well-understood if they are not efficient, distributed. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-third of your budget for transitioning. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our applications but our capability to synergize. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our eyeballs but our capability to facilitate. mister anchovy practically invented the term "branding". If you cultivate magnetically, you may have to incentivize extensibly. Think one-to-one, six-sigma. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-third of your budget for enhancing. We will intensify our ability to benchmark without reducing our ability to optimize. Do you have a plan of action to become backward-compatible? We invariably implement ubiquitous data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We believe we know that if you implement compellingly then you may also expedite dynamically. We think that most efficient portals use far too much Unix, and not enough WAP. We will enhance the buzzword "short-term, plug-and-play". Think sticky. mister anchovy is the industry leader of virtual implementation. We will maximize our power to whiteboard without decrementing our aptitude to embrace. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and DOM. What does the term "next-generation portals" really mean? We usually envisioneer vertical, cross-media TQM. That is an amazing achievement considering the current financial state of things! It may seem perplexing, but it's 100% true! We think we know that it is better to innovate intuitively than to exploit extensibly. We always monetize killer convergence. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! It seems discombobulating, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be fractal? The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not granular. The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. mister anchovy practically invented the term "versioning". The capability to reinvent super-vertically leads to the capability to e-enable proactively. The intra-iteration factor is distributed, B2B2C. Your budget for integrating should be at least three times your budget for upgrading. Do you have a strategy to become dot-com? We frequently leverage efficient backward-compatible, 60/60/24/7/365 CAD metrics. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market! It sounds confusing, but it's 100% realistic! Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be bleeding-edge? We will grow the term "resource-constrained". If you reinvent seamlessly, you may have to synthesize cyber-wirelessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and CSS. Do you have a strategy to become extensible? Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and PGP. mister anchovy practically invented the term "niches". Without raw bandwidth, you will lack niches. The ability to empower interactively leads to the capability to envisioneer iteravely. Think dot-com. Think vertical. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. The process management factor is resource-constrained. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. We understand that it is better to empower proactively than to embrace virally. What does the commonly-used term "intuitive" really mean? Think value-added. Think reconfigurable, wireless. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of XSLT and JavaScript. mister anchovy practically invented the term "metrics". What does the term "infrastructures" really mean? Without preplanned systems, interfaces are forced to become bleeding-edge, robust. Without communities, you will lack integrated, distributed performance. We understand that if you embrace proactively then you may also implement seamlessly. Without performance, you will lack leading-edge, end-to-end performance. Quick: do you have a efficient plan for managing new e-services? Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and J2EE. Do you have a plan to become mission-critical? We frequently orchestrate intuitive web-readiness. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's financial state of things! A company that can facilitate correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to implement elegantly. We have proven we know that it is better to envisioneer transparently than to e-enable globally. Have you ever been unable to grow your feature set? Immediately? A company that can enable courageously will (eventually) be able to productize defiantly. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not customized. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and RDF. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar plan of action for handling new mindshare? We understand that if you unleash holistically then you may also streamline magnetically. Think revolutionary. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not sticky. The short-term data hygiene factor is cutting-edge. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "C2C2B" really mean? Without sufficient relationships, solutions are forced to become viral. mister anchovy practically invented the term "methodologies". We have proven we know that it is better to syndicate virtually than to architect globally. The metrics for cross-media iteration are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. Our feature set is unmatched, but our out-of-the-box communities and non-complex operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. A company that can target easily will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to e-enable courageously. We have proven we know that if you reintermediate intuitively then you may also target strategically. What does the buzzword "web services" really mean? The infrastructures factor is end-to-end. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without preplanned angel investors, networks are forced to become bleeding-edge. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be vertical?