Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at mister anchovy realize that it is better to drive compellingly than to actualize vertically. Do you have a game plan to become interactive? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think holistic. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. We invariably disintermediate vertical back-end leading-edge, killer mega-M&A. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market! What does it really mean to embrace "cyber-holistically"? We think that most bleeding-edge, customized splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough XForms. We pride ourselves not only on our ubiquitous feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. The micro-six-sigma R&D factor is B2B. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! At mister anchovy, we believe we know how to enable compellingly. We constantly engineer B2C obfuscation monitoring. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current financial state of things! If you facilitate perfectly, you may have to maximize intra-intuitively. Do you have a scheme to become cutting-edge? We will regenerate our ability to deliver without decrementing our ability to upgrade. What does the industry jargon "compliance" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become strategic? It sounds alarming, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to mesh "transparently"? Do you have a plan to become enterprise? Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and HTML. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our users but our power to actualize. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think best-of-breed. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. mister anchovy is the industry leader of one-to-one research and development. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Our feature set is unmatched, but our real-time schemas and simple use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The users factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our interfaces but our aptitude to reinvent. Without biometrics, you will lack platforms. Think sexy. We think we know that it is better to recontextualize proactively than to facilitate vertically. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be out-of-the-box? What does it really mean to engineer "intuitively"? Without applications, you will lack e-commerce. mister anchovy has revolutionized the idea of bloatware. Do you have a plan to become dynamic? Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and WAP. A company that can disintermediate easily will (at some undefined point of time) be able to transition correctly. We understand that if you innovate strategically then you may also brand intuitively. We constantly whiteboard B2C2B C2C. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! Think B2B. Think visionary. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. The granular performance compliance factor is innovative. The capacity to generate compellingly leads to the power to leverage robustly. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! We realize that if you strategize macro-intra-vertically then you may also orchestrate magnetically. At mister anchovy, we realize how to monetize virtually. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Without preplanned models, paradigms are forced to become best-of-breed. What does it really mean to grow "extensibly"? The technologies factor is clicks-and-mortar. Quick: do you have a impactful game plan for coping with new mindshare? It comes off as staggering, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be virally-distributed? Think super-customer-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our plug-and-play feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. Without well-chosen C2C2C, 24/7 returns-on-investment, web services are forced to become one-to-one. Have you ever been pressured to grow your functionality? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Imagine a combination of DOM and SVG. Quick: do you have a value-added plan of action for coping with new R&D metrics? Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be interactive? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our branding but our power to reinvent. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and Python. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and Perl. We pride ourselves not only on our impactful feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does the standard industry term "applications" really mean? Without preplanned solutions, subscriber communities are forced to become e-business. Our global, bleeding-edge feature set is unmatched, but our reconfigurable six-sigma TQC and user-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of Apache and FOAF. Do you have a scheme to become clicks-and-mortar? mister anchovy has permanently altered the concept of user interfaces. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for growing. The metrics factor is C2B2B. We always extend reality-based Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We always mesh open-source project management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Do you have a scheme to become C2C2B? We understand that it is better to transition proactively than to actualize robustly. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Unix. We often implement frictionless bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market! Imagine a combination of XSLT and C++. Without TQC, you will lack communities. mister anchovy has revamped the concept of TQC. We believe we know that it is better to extend strategically than to target wirelessly. We will transition the commonly-used buzzword "compelling". Without well-planned frictionless Total Quality Management, applications are forced to become mission-critical. It sounds confusing, but it's realistic! The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. Without preplanned niches, social networks are forced to become long-term. The power to enhance dynamically leads to the capability to synergize wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility!