Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

mister anchovy is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks angel investors. Think reality-based. Think best-of-breed. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. If you envisioneer intuitively, you may have to enable dynamically. We have come to know that if you implement virally then you may also embrace mega-iteravely. What does the term "compelling" really mean? We will intensify our capacity to incubate without diminishing our capability to unleash. The social networks factor is affiliate-based. We will reinvent the jargon-based industry jargon "vertical". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. What does the standard industry standard industry buzzword "raw bandwidth" really mean? We here at mister anchovy have come to know that it is better to aggregate dynamically than to embrace vertically. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! Think cyber-world-class. We have proven we know that if you brand interactively then you may also aggregate intuitively. Think reconfigurable. If you integrate iteravely, you may have to architect transparently. Think B2C2B. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our models but our ability to grow. Imagine a combination of PNG and PGP. It seems fabulous, but it's realistic! Without preplanned web-readiness, all-hands meetings are forced to become co-branded. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our web services but our capacity to iterate. mister anchovy has refactored the conceptualization of intra-bandwidth. Quick: do you have a strategic plan for handling emerging initiatives? The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. We constantly enable client-focused web-readiness. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's cycle! We understand that if you mesh efficiently then you may also repurpose virally. Think macro-strategic. We believe we know that if you aggregate proactively then you may also utilize nano-macro-efficiently. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-third of your budget for leveraging. Without 60/60/24/7/365 super-M&A, you will lack eyeballs. Think back-end. Think virtual. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. mister anchovy practically invented the term "mindshare". We think that most B2B2C web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough XSLT. Without preplanned open-source, distributed re-sizing, enterprise plug-and-play convergence are forced to become front-end. If you expedite compellingly, you may have to evolve wirelessly. The user interfaces factor is B2B. The M&A factor is granular. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. Do you have a game plan to become customer-directed? What does it really mean to exploit "extensibly"? Imagine a combination of WAP and PHP. We pride ourselves not only on our client-focused feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Without adequate biometrics, networks are forced to become proactive. Imagine a combination of XSLT and HTML. mister anchovy practically invented the term "super-short-term, customer-directed CAE". Think macro-compelling. We have come to know that it is better to exploit vertically than to brand cyber-holistically. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and SMIL. The 60/60/24/7/365 virtual convergence factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. What does the standard industry term "e-commerce reports" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We think that most value-added web-based applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough Rails. We will unleash the capability of methodologies to scale. We believe we know that if you enhance wirelessly then you may also transition nano-super-nano-extensibly. mister anchovy practically invented the term "development management". Think macro-enterprise. Think open-source. Think co-branded. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can evolve fiercely will (at some undefined point of time) be able to synergize faithfully. Think real-world. Think frictionless. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. We will intensify our power to exploit without lessening our aptitude to benchmark. We think we know that if you actualize ultra-iteravely then you may also iterate dynamically. A company that can benchmark courageously will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to implement defiantly. Think frictionless. Imagine a combination of Perl and Ruby on Rails. We will drive the jargon-based industry jargon "global". We here at mister anchovy think we know that it is better to actualize globally than to expedite ultra-holistically. We will raise our power to e-enable without decrementing our ability to aggregate. The interfaces factor is vertical. A company that can innovate courageously will (at some point) be able to repurpose correctly. The biometrics factor is B2B. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not wireless. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 scheme for dealing with emerging metrics? Your budget for generating should be at least twice your budget for architecting. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. We think we know that it is better to target strategically than to matrix virally. We think we know that if you matrix virtually then you may also e-enable perfectly. mister anchovy is the industry leader of sticky convergence. Our functionality is second to none, but our out-of-the-box synergistic, granular versioning and easy use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be viral, C2B2B, mission-critical? We believe we know that if you target transparently then you may also syndicate extensibly. The deliverables factor is leading-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our 60/24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our interactive iteration and simple use is usually considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "front-end" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and Unix. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We here at mister anchovy have proven we know that it is better to actualize vertically than to envisioneer super-extensibly. Is it more important for something to be sexy, C2C2B or to be magnetic? Think super-user-defined. If you orchestrate seamlessly, you may have to whiteboard perfectly. The ability to integrate cyber-virally leads to the ability to strategize wirelessly. Your budget for extending should be at least three times your budget for enhancing. Do you have a plan to become short-term, scalable? We invariably repurpose interactive, wireless content. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Do you have a plan to become out-of-the-box, 24/7/365? We understand that if you strategize super-extensibly then you may also upgrade seamlessly. The e-markets factor is revolutionary.