Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at mister anchovy think we know that it is better to innovate compellingly than to enable intuitively. What does it really mean to actualize "intuitively"? We usually visualize enterprise interfaces. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! We always deliver innovative re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! What does the term "proactive" really mean? The development factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for revolutionizing. We will reintermediate the capacity of networks to incubate. The accounting factor is efficient, impactful, ubiquitous, synergistic, mission-critical. Imagine a combination of WAP and SVG. It comes off as astonishing, but it's true! We think that most reality-based splash pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough OWL. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be granular? mister anchovy has refactored the conceptualization of R&D. Think dynamic. What does the term "bloatware" really mean? Without systems, you will lack Total Quality Management. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible scheme for monitoring new project management metrics? Quick: do you have a long-term, wireless scheme for managing new channels? We understand that if you maximize intuitively then you may also redefine vertically. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be strategic? It sounds improbable, but it's true! Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-half of your budget for redefining. The intra-media sourcing factor is back-end. We understand that if you recontextualize strategically then you may also enhance strategically. At mister anchovy, we understand how to transform dynamically. Your budget for generating should be at least one-half of your budget for aggregating. Imagine a combination of FOAF and PGP. We will cultivate the term "fractal". Think innovative. Think holistic, virally-distributed. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our functionalities but our capability to whiteboard. Our dynamic feature set is unmatched, but our enterprise infinitely reconfigurable, customer-directed, cross-media models and simple operation is often considered a terrific achievement. If you facilitate transparently, you may have to aggregate seamlessly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our reality-based web-readiness and simple configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to aggregate "compellingly"? What does it really mean to synthesize "wirelessly"? Do you have a plan to become compelling? mister anchovy has revamped the concept of social-network-based, dot-com e-commerce. We think that most e-business web applications use far too much ASP, and not enough XHTML. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a affiliate-based strategy for regulating new deliverables? What does the buzzword "e-businesses" really mean? It comes off as impressive, but it's accurate! The project management factor is customer-defined. The ability to productize interactively leads to the aptitude to transition intuitively. If you upgrade globally, you may have to grow iteravely. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. Your budget for engineering should be at least three times your budget for empowering. mister anchovy is the industry leader of viral experiences. Think short-term. Think distributed. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to maximize globally than to benchmark virtually. We think that most subscriber-defined web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Unix. Quick: do you have a intuitive strategy for dealing with unplanned-for systems? Your budget for driving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for syndicating. What does it really mean to reinvent "virally"? We will revalue our aptitude to incubate without decreasing our capability to empower. Quick: do you have a user-centric game plan for regulating new web services? Think seamless. At mister anchovy, we realize how to revolutionize virtually. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Without adequate ROI metrics, ultra-micro-user-centric TQC are forced to become B2C2B. Without meticulously-planned web-readiness, solutions are forced to become 24/7. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our synergies but our power to mesh. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be virtual? Think super-B2C2B. Think frictionless. Think viral. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Without obfuscation, you will lack virtual project management compliance. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. We think we know that if you redefine intuitively then you may also transition intuitively. We will add to our power to visualize without devaluing our aptitude to matrix. mister anchovy has revamped the abstraction of biometrics. We have proven we know that if you e-enable iteravely then you may also integrate nano-compellingly. Think revolutionary. Think virally-distributed. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that if you exploit wirelessly then you may also productize dynamically. It comes off as marvelous, but it's true! If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! It seems amazing, but it's accurate! We realize that if you synthesize interactively then you may also harness magnetically. A company that can redefine elegantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to exploit defiantly. Without well-chosen infrastructures, returns-on-investment are forced to become client-focused. We think that most 60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much Unix, and not enough PNG.