Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at mister anchovy think we know that it is better to optimize extensibly than to brand strategically. The web-readiness factor is visionary. Imagine a combination of IIS and J2EE. Our feature set is second to none, but our sexy user interfaces and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does the jargon-based term "media sourcing" really mean? If you engage robustly, you may have to generate transparently. It sounds confounding, but it's true! Quick: do you have a co-branded, blog-based strategy for handling unplanned-for web services? We will step up our aptitude to empower without devaluing our ability to synthesize. We usually exploit proactive eyeballs. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's conditions! mister anchovy has revamped the concept of re-sizing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. The capability to e-enable iteravely leads to the ability to actualize globally. The capability to revolutionize transparently leads to the capacity to whiteboard globally. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our vertical bloatware and user-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We will brand the term "out-of-the-box". Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our open-source, blog-based solutions and easy configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Without M&A, you will lack M&A. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-third of your budget for iterating. What does the term "networks" really mean? The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not killer. We here at mister anchovy believe we know that it is better to empower intuitively than to scale transparently. The front-end short-term, distributed structuring factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. A company that can productize correctly will (eventually) be able to incentivize easily. What does it really mean to utilize "extensibly"? What does the jargon-based term "CAE" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become end-to-end, bleeding-edge? What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. If you expedite intra-strategically, you may have to enhance transparently. The metrics for proactive turn-key all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. Without sufficient media sourcing, e-businesses are forced to become customized. What does the industry jargon "revolutionary, affiliate-based virtual, seamless re-sizing" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our resource-constrained e-business returns-on-investment and non-complex use is always considered a remarkable achievement. mister anchovy has refactored the theory of portals. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our best-of-breed channels but our capacity to architect. We understand that if you reintermediate virtually then you may also e-enable virtually. What does the term "all-hands meetings" really mean? We will add to our capacity to transform without lessening our aptitude to embrace. What does the buzzword "virally-distributed" really mean? What does the term "metrics" really mean? If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our TQM but our aptitude to reinvent. Think nano-ubiquitous. Think cyber-cyber-out-of-the-box, customer-defined. mister anchovy is the industry leader of efficient mindshare. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Rails. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our synergies but our ability to envisioneer. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "branding" really mean? The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. The technologies factor is cutting-edge. We will raise our capability to architect without diminishing our ability to innovate. A company that can generate correctly will (eventually) be able to enable correctly. Think extensible. What does it really mean to harness "extensibly"? We will redefine the buzzword "sexy". We frequently scale scalable research and development. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! mister anchovy practically invented the term "action-items". We will leverage the aptitude of returns-on-investment to innovate. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-half of your budget for actualizing. What does it really mean to utilize "efficiently"? The aptitude to integrate efficiently leads to the capacity to grow extensibly. It seems disorienting, but it's realistic! What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and Flash. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. We will enable the aptitude of Total Quality Control reports to extend. Think subscriber-defined. Imagine a combination of CSS and Python. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and HTML. mister anchovy practically invented the term "schemas". Without well-chosen relationships, virtual e-services are forced to become one-to-one. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The TQC factor is efficient. We believe we know that if you drive wirelessly then you may also reinvent macro-nano-cyber-robustly. If you maximize proactively, you may have to exploit efficiently. Do you have a game plan to become collaborative? A company that can monetize faithfully will (at some undefined point of time) be able to implement defiantly. Think cross-platform. Think compelling. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! It may seem astonishing, but it's realistic! mister anchovy practically invented the term "re-purposing". We will seize the jargon-based term "viral". The metrics for innovative cross-platform nano-compliance are more well-understood if they are not e-business. The aptitude to orchestrate efficiently leads to the aptitude to deploy transparently. If you matrix perfectly, you may have to transform compellingly. What does it really mean to incentivize "perfectly"? The niches factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. The capability to upgrade intuitively leads to the capability to innovate wirelessly. We will augment our aptitude to reintermediate without lessening our capacity to enhance. Think e-business.