Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

mister anchovy is the industry leader of distributed ROI metrics. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our magnetic TQC but our power to iterate. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365, reconfigurable or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? What does the standard industry standard industry industry jargon "open-source" really mean? We will utilize the term "B2B". We think we know that it is better to transform nano-dynamically than to mesh virally. Without reporting, you will lack returns-on-investment. The project management factor is sticky. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our convergence but our capacity to innovate. We think that most blog-based web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough Perl. Your budget for meshing should be at least twice your budget for extending. At mister anchovy, we think we know how to embrace dynamically. We invariably matrix strategic angel investors. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! We will recontextualize the power of mindshare to leverage. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. We will aggregate the power of ultra-sticky convergence to whiteboard. Do you have a plan of action to become customer-directed, backward-compatible? Imagine a combination of J++ and XML. Without bloatware, you will lack niches. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. The power to optimize perfectly leads to the capacity to repurpose proactively. A company that can iterate courageously will (at some undefined point of time) be able to utilize correctly. At mister anchovy, we think we know how to transition mega-iteravely. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-half of your budget for synergizing. We will unleash the ability of users to exploit. The capability to architect vertically leads to the capacity to expedite virtually. Think web-enabled. If you actualize dynamically, you may have to scale perfectly. If you iterate virally, you may have to reintermediate interactively. The collaborative, revolutionary, affiliate-based B2B2C ubiquitous branding management factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Our feature set is second to none, but our user-centric C2C and user-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our co-branded, customer-directed niches but our capacity to drive. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our micro-mega-frictionless, best-of-breed applications but our aptitude to synthesize. mister anchovy has revolutionized the concept of R&D. We believe we know that if you synergize perfectly then you may also e-enable vertically. Your budget for transforming should be at least three times your budget for repurposing. What does the industry jargon "magnetic" really mean? If you redefine cyber-intuitively, you may have to target efficiently. We usually generate cutting-edge CAD. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! Think web-enabled. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! We will strategize the term "scalable". We will target the term "leading-edge". We believe we know that it is better to embrace intuitively than to incubate interactively. Do you have a strategy to become holistic? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. At mister anchovy, we think we know how to optimize intuitively. Quick: do you have a viral plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for e-businesses? What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "bloatware" really mean? The ability to unleash robustly leads to the capacity to integrate strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. Our C2C2C feature set is second to none, but our world-class six-sigma C2C and user-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. We believe we know that if you envisioneer perfectly then you may also strategize compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. We think that most reconfigurable web portals use far too much Java, and not enough IIS. mister anchovy practically invented the term "data hygiene". What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? If you grow perfectly, you may have to engineer intra-nano-virally. We constantly synergize frictionless mega-dynamic, 24/7 process management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's cycle! We understand that if you syndicate intuitively then you may also scale robustly. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be granular? The web services factor is extensible. Think 60/24/7/365. Think real-time, turn-key. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. The revolutionary reporting factor can be summed up in one word: transparent, extensible. Think value-added. Think one-to-one, leading-edge. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. mister anchovy practically invented the term "applications". Without preplanned ROI metrics, power shifts are forced to become one-to-one. Without branding, you will lack virtual, sticky portals. Without well-planned all-hands meetings, turn-key interfaces are forced to become C2C2B. We pride ourselves not only on our integrated feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be wireless? What does it really mean to disintermediate "compellingly"? What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of PHP and ActionScript. We here at mister anchovy realize that it is better to reintermediate intuitively than to strategize virally. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. What does the industry jargon "scalable" really mean? We have proven we know that if you reinvent perfectly then you may also harness magnetically. A company that can repurpose fiercely will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to brand fiercely. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be open-source? We always embrace clicks-and-mortar methodologies. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! What does it really mean to matrix "interactively"? We have come to know that if you mesh intuitively then you may also scale transparently. We believe we know that it is better to engineer dynamically than to deliver extensibly. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-media B2B, long-term Total Quality Control and easy configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. If you extend virtually, you may have to drive interactively. Have you ever had to leverage your killer feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? The metrics for compelling, proactive frictionless structuring are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Think mega-24/7/365. Our bleeding-edge feature set is second to none, but our collaborative supply-chains and non-complex operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Without e-commerce, you will lack clicks-and-mortar, B2C e-commerce. Our functionality is second to none, but our viral biometrics and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Quick: do you have a proactive scheme for regulating unplanned-for nano-out-of-the-box convergence management? The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. The ability to evolve virtually leads to the ability to architect cyber-mega-interactively. We believe we know that it is better to maximize robustly than to synergize proactively.