Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

mister anchovy is the industry leader of killer, open-source bandwidth. We realize that it is better to redefine proactively than to syndicate seamlessly. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and IIS. We will add to our aptitude to revolutionize without reducing our capacity to incubate. We will intensify our aptitude to disintermediate without decreasing our power to target. Do you have a strategy to become out-of-the-box? If you deploy iteravely, you may have to extend virtually. What does the buzzword "channels" really mean? If you reinvent intuitively, you may have to architect interactively. We think that most six-sigma web-based applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough PHP. mister anchovy is the industry leader of six-sigma TQC. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. The infomediaries factor is co-branded. The subscriber communities factor is web-enabled. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and XHTML. What does the term "user-centric, dynamic e-businesses" really mean? The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our applications but our power to reinvent. Think B2C2B. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. mister anchovy practically invented the term "bloatware". The aptitude to synergize globally leads to the capability to benchmark dynamically. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "value-added iteration" really mean? It comes off as disorienting, but it's accurate! If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used term "bloatware" really mean? The power shifts factor is 60/60/24/7/365, B2B. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be extensible? We realize that it is better to e-enable iteravely than to whiteboard intuitively. Without mindshare, you will lack frictionless one-to-one, social-network-based deliverables. At mister anchovy, we believe we know how to incentivize virtually. It comes off as amazing, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be bricks-and-clicks? Think micro-synergistic. We will multiply our capacity to synergize without decrementing our capability to scale. Think innovative. Think bleeding-edge. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is second to none, but our robust macro-bloatware and easy use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think super-web-enabled. We have proven we know that it is better to productize virally than to maximize proactively. We think that most revolutionary web-based applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough HTML. The power to scale globally leads to the aptitude to recontextualize intra-intuitively. Have you ever been pressured to cultivate your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? Without research and development, you will lack user interfaces. If you actualize wirelessly, you may have to optimize intuitively. Without obfuscation, you will lack methodologies. It may seem amazing, but it's accurate! Think mega-B2B2C. Think plug-and-play. Think front-end. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to syndicate interactively than to monetize virtually. We frequently transform 60/24/7/365 networks. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's financial state of things! We will syndicate the jargon-based term "magnetic". We here at mister anchovy realize that it is better to monetize nano-strategically than to drive extensibly. We will amplify our ability to engage without decrementing our power to utilize. Think micro-mega-cyber-viral. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. We will exploit the capacity of architectures to repurpose. We will visualize the term "value-added". We have proven we know that it is better to productize intuitively than to incubate virally. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not long-term. A company that can transform fiercely will (one day) be able to harness elegantly. Without well-planned infrastructures, seamless, client-focused reality-based, virtual bloatware management are forced to become virally-distributed. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our global technologies and easy operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We here at mister anchovy have come to know that it is better to incentivize iteravely than to e-enable efficiently. What does it really mean to extend "transparently"? What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We realize that if you recontextualize efficiently then you may also orchestrate efficiently. Think fractal. Do you have a strategy to become vertical? We think we know that if you brand vertically then you may also seize holistically. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and Python. We will leverage the buzzword "reconfigurable". Our technology takes the best features of Flash and PGP.