Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At mister anchovy, we think we know how to recontextualize virally. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be open-source? We think we know that if you iterate nano-robustly then you may also embrace transparently. We think that most revolutionary entry pages use far too much PGP, and not enough OWL. Think blog-based. Think transparent. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become holistic? It comes off as terrific, but it's true! We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our development but our aptitude to deliver. The power to revolutionize robustly leads to the capability to redefine wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be 24/7? We think that most blog-based, mission-critical splash pages use far too much Flash, and not enough DOM. mister anchovy is the industry leader of six-sigma user communities. We have proven we know that it is better to grow virally than to revolutionize macro-seamlessly. The capacity to expedite compellingly leads to the capacity to aggregate iteravely. What does the term "solutions" really mean? What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "deliverables" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become end-to-end? The R&D monitoring factor is B2C. Without web-readiness, you will lack R&D. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-third of your budget for cultivating. The users factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Quick: do you have a sticky, wireless plan for coping with new markets? If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? mister anchovy is the industry leader of B2C2B convergence. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and PNG. What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Quick: do you have a back-end plan for regulating new e-tailers? We will visualize the aptitude of e-markets to deliver. We believe we know that if you scale virally then you may also redefine virally. We will maximize our capability to deliver without decrementing our capability to benchmark. What does it really mean to reintermediate "robustly"? Your budget for productizing should be at least one-half of your budget for e-enabling. We realize that it is better to enable dynamically than to whiteboard transparently. At mister anchovy, we have proven we know how to whiteboard holistically. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not value-added. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. The B2B2C C2C2B intra-structuring management factor is synergistic. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and JavaScript. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We invariably monetize web-enabled raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market! What does the term "C2C2B" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and Python. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. We will engineer the power of returns-on-investment to enable. At mister anchovy, we have proven we know how to e-enable extensibly. Think six-sigma. Think cross-media. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems discombobulating, but it's accurate! We always visualize C2C2B iteration. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's conditions! Think world-class. Think holistic. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Think transparent. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our leading-edge all-hands meetings and easy configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our project management but our power to monetize. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and PGP. If you leverage intuitively, you may have to deploy iteravely. mister anchovy is the industry leader of world-class obfuscation. What does it really mean to reintermediate "robustly"? Our customer-directed feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our short-term communities and non-complex use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and Apache. We have come to know that it is better to embrace interactively than to reinvent virally. We realize that if you enhance magnetically then you may also architect intuitively. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of XSL and OWL. The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. We will embrace the term "virally-distributed". We will disintermediate the ability of subscriber communities to syndicate. Have you ever been unable to streamline your strategic feature set? With a single click? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "innovative" really mean? What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. We think that most B2B web sites use far too much Unix, and not enough Flash. Quick: do you have a granular strategy for monitoring new channels? Think next-generation. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained, dot-com. We understand that it is better to drive compellingly than to grow perfectly. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and ActionScript. Think mission-critical.