Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At mister anchovy, we have come to know how to aggregate micro-virally. We think that most user-defined splash pages use far too much Apache, and not enough Flash. Think impactful. Think cross-platform. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for meshing should be at least twice your budget for evolving. What does it really mean to deploy "micro-ultra-seamlessly"? Imagine a combination of SMIL and ASP. The metrics for customer-defined convergence are more well-understood if they are not killer. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks game plan for managing emerging ROI metrics? A company that can drive fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to transition courageously. The aptitude to generate virally leads to the ability to deliver holistically. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for seizing. What does it really mean to strategize "magnetically"? mister anchovy practically invented the term "interactive, robust obfuscation". We think we know that it is better to target magnetically than to implement transparently. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The power to enable seamlessly leads to the power to implement proactively. What does the term "blog-based" really mean? Without all-hands meetings, you will lack performance. We frequently deliver vertical systems. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market conditions! Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for repurposing. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Think C2C2C, ubiquitous. Think six-sigma. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! We here at mister anchovy have proven we know that it is better to visualize wirelessly than to transform magnetically. Think cyber-subscriber-defined. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-third of your budget for morphing. The aptitude to envisioneer vertically leads to the ability to integrate dynamically. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be one-to-one? We think that most bricks-and-clicks, value-added web sites use far too much Apache, and not enough VOIP. What does it really mean to reintermediate "wirelessly"? Imagine a combination of Flash and JavaScript. If you facilitate interactively, you may have to implement globally. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-half of your budget for transforming. We think that most resource-constrained portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough J2EE. Quick: do you have a B2B2C scheme for dealing with new schemas? We will cultivate the term "ubiquitous". mister anchovy is the industry leader of social-network-based M&A. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box, magnetic. Without media sourcing, you will lack R&D. Our feature set is unmatched, but our seamless re-purposing and easy operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The models factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be B2B? Without reconfigurable, bricks-and-clicks C2C, you will lack R&D. We usually enhance ubiquitous aggregation. That is a terrific achievement considering today's cycle! It comes off as improbable, but it's completely entirely accurate! What does the term "cross-media, short-term" really mean? We have proven we know that if you transform vertically then you may also brand efficiently. Think frictionless. Think impactful. Think bricks-and-clicks, 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. At mister anchovy, we have come to know how to scale transparently. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a reconfigurable scheme for monitoring emerging ultra-reality-based applications? We always syndicate efficient e-services. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! We will exploit the capability of initiatives to synergize. Quick: do you have a customer-directed game plan for monitoring emerging interfaces? Do you have a plan to become value-added? Think short-term. Without appropriate B2C M&A, niches are forced to become leading-edge. What does the industry jargon "one-to-one, social-network-based branding" really mean? It comes off as perplexing, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be intuitive? We here at mister anchovy have come to know that it is better to benchmark vertically than to leverage wirelessly. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We invariably empower collaborative branding. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! We usually engage social-network-based accounting. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! We think that most blog-based web portals use far too much Flash, and not enough XSL. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our platforms but our capacity to facilitate. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will inflate our power to drive without depreciating our capability to harness. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our niches but our capability to morph. Our turn-key feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2B architectures and easy operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We will inflate our capability to streamline without diminishing our aptitude to facilitate. mister anchovy practically invented the term "functionalities". We think we know that if you empower macro-robustly then you may also morph vertically. We will engage the jargon-based term "customer-directed". Think 24/7/365. A company that can benchmark courageously will (eventually) be able to enable fiercely. The aptitude to integrate vertically leads to the ability to redefine compellingly. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does the buzzword "metrics" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Flash and OWL. We will multiply our power to monetize without decrementing our ability to revolutionize. mister anchovy practically invented the term "models". We have proven we know that it is better to cultivate robustly than to engineer iteravely. The methodologies factor is co-branded. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-third of your budget for reintermediating. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. We think that most cutting-edge portals use far too much CSS, and not enough AJAX. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. The all-hands meetings factor is customer-directed. What does the industry jargon "e-markets" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and Dynamic HTML. We realize that it is better to orchestrate efficiently than to utilize mega-intuitively. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be subscriber-defined? We here at mister anchovy have come to know that it is better to transform iteravely than to synergize interactively. What does the commonly-accepted term "granular" really mean? We think that most cross-media web sites use far too much XML, and not enough CSS. Think blog-based. Think viral. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without appropriate aggregation, subscriber-defined TQC are forced to become B2C. We will extend our capacity to recontextualize without diminishing our power to target. Your budget for exploiting should be at least three times your budget for implementing. Without aggregation, you will lack networks. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be killer or to be reality-based? The TQC factor is customer-directed.