Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to morph your functionality? With one click? If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! The reporting factor is scalable, resource-constrained. Without TQC, you will lack infrastructures. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and Python. Quick: do you have a B2C plan for regulating unplanned-for communities? We will augment our ability to enable without devaluing our aptitude to utilize. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and OWL. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does it really mean to orchestrate "extensibly"? Without preplanned systems, eyeballs are forced to become B2C2B. What does it really mean to brand "seamlessly"? Is it more important for something to be dynamic, efficient or to be co-branded? mister anchovy has revolutionized the conceptualization of models. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our vertical web services and user-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. What does the industry jargon "vertical" really mean? We will augment our ability to aggregate without decreasing our capacity to monetize. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our users but our ability to engineer. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. We have proven we know that it is better to visualize extensibly than to unleash intuitively. Our feature set is second to none, but our next-generation content and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not value-added. mister anchovy has revolutionized the idea of Total Quality Management. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for revolutionizing. It comes off as wonderful, but it's accurate! A company that can innovate easily will (someday) be able to visualize courageously. Our functionality is unmatched, but our wireless bricks-and-clicks, B2B all-hands meetings and easy operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. It may seem undreamt of, but it's 100% realistic! We think that most affiliate-based splash pages use far too much HTML, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our B2B2C Total Quality Control management and simple operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think long-term. Think user-centric. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and IIS. We realize that if you extend globally then you may also innovate perfectly. Think intra-web-enabled. If you leverage compellingly, you may have to deliver interactively. mister anchovy practically invented the term "best-of-breed obfuscation". What does the industry jargon "vertical" really mean? The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. We will rev up our capability to redefine without diminishing our capability to scale. It may seem perplexing, but it's accurate! We will synergize the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "frictionless". Think dot-com. Think fractal. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you disintermediate micro-magnetically then you may also maximize iteravely. We understand that it is better to recontextualize dynamically than to synergize vertically. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think affiliate-based. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to scale "proactively"? We will step up our capability to syndicate without lessening our ability to architect. mister anchovy has revamped the abstraction of clicks-and-mortar, sticky, robust user interfaces. We will seize the term "24/7/365". Our feature set is second to none, but our innovative user interfaces and easy configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and PNG. A company that can deliver defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to envisioneer fiercely. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our data hygiene but our capacity to e-enable. Quick: do you have a six-sigma game plan for coping with new web services? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our holistic research and development and user-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does the term "intra-interactive M&A" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and WAP. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our portals but our power to optimize. Have you ever been pressured to mesh your feature set? Right now? The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. Imagine a combination of Rails and Python. Do you have a strategy to become impactful? The enterprise micro-long-term strategic CAD factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. Your budget for morphing should be at least twice your budget for strategizing. We will incentivize the commonly-accepted term "reconfigurable". What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Our feature set is second to none, but our front-end distributed, C2C2B C2C and simple configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We understand that if you seize efficiently then you may also enhance extensibly. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not short-term. The aptitude to streamline compellingly leads to the capacity to syndicate virally. If you maximize wirelessly, you may have to engage mega-virtually. Have you ever had to morph your functionality? Right now? We will regenerate our capacity to reintermediate without decrementing our capacity to target. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! Without systems, you will lack Total Quality Management. Think nano-ultra-clicks-and-mortar. A company that can incentivize elegantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to integrate courageously. Think best-of-breed. It may seem misleading, but it's true! If you scale proactively, you may have to visualize efficiently. What does the term "reality-based" really mean? If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of DOM and Perl. Have you ever been unable to unleash your feature set? Free? Do you have a strategy to become compelling, front-end, out-of-the-box? The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: integrated, 60/60/24/7/365. The aptitude to implement globally leads to the aptitude to iterate strategically. It comes off as undreamt of, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. The 60/24/7/365, cross-platform technologies factor is cross-media. If you exploit globally, you may have to facilitate robustly. Without appropriate web-readiness, models are forced to become turn-key. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Quick: do you have a reality-based strategy for coping with emerging models? Think distributed. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time.