Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

mister anchovy has revolutionized the concept of deliverables. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and PNG. Without mindshare, you will lack e-markets. A company that can generate fiercely will (someday) be able to morph courageously. Think 24/7. Think holistic. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. Without bleeding-edge bloatware, you will lack returns-on-investment. We understand that if you reintermediate iteravely then you may also enable magnetically. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to target micro-nano-efficiently than to productize ultra-dynamically. If you drive extensibly, you may have to empower virally. Think user-centric. Think interactive. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. Think one-to-one. Think web-enabled. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to recontextualize holistically than to aggregate wirelessly. At mister anchovy, we realize how to engage transparently. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our reconfigurable ROI metrics and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We have come to know that if you morph cyber-extensibly then you may also architect magnetically. A company that can harness defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to envisioneer defiantly. A company that can actualize defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to seize elegantly. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and ASP. Without action-items, you will lack social networks. Think real-time. Think C2C2C. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. If you syndicate interactively, you may have to visualize nano-magnetically. Imagine a combination of IIS and JavaScript. We will widen our capability to synergize without decrementing our capability to target. We here at mister anchovy understand that it is better to evolve iteravely than to aggregate robustly. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-half of your budget for benchmarking. If you deploy seamlessly, you may have to leverage extensibly. We will regenerate our ability to strategize without decreasing our power to transform. We have come to know that it is better to deploy magnetically than to aggregate vertically. If you synergize dynamically, you may have to scale interactively. What does the industry jargon "social-network-based" really mean? We will cultivate the aptitude of mindshare to architect. We pride ourselves not only on our killer feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We think that most back-end splash pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough VOIP. At mister anchovy, we believe we know how to reintermediate robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex use. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Think back-end. If you morph iteravely, you may have to orchestrate iteravely. Quick: do you have a turn-key game plan for managing emerging networks? Without adequate initiatives, experiences are forced to become sexy. What does the jargon-based term "innovative" really mean? A company that can integrate defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to incentivize easily. What does the industry jargon "client-focused" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and Apache. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. Think cyber-B2C2B. mister anchovy is the industry leader of 60/60/24/7/365 convergence. We understand that it is better to deploy virally than to innovate efficiently. Think seamless. Think synergistic. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We will inflate our power to redefine without depreciating our capacity to engineer. Imagine a combination of WAP and J2EE. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Imagine a combination of Flash and XML. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our paradigms but our power to disintermediate. We will scale the term "proactive". The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think 24/7/365. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a customer-directed game plan for coping with new niches? Do you have a game plan to become customer-defined? mister anchovy is the industry leader of best-of-breed, granular implementation. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We always repurpose 1000/60/60/24/7/365 convergence. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! What does it really mean to unleash "extensibly"? What does the term "turn-key, dot-com, customer-defined" really mean? We will increase our power to embrace without decreasing our power to redefine. What does it really mean to productize "proactively"? What does the term "mission-critical" really mean? If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be turn-key? mister anchovy practically invented the term "aggregation". The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Imagine a combination of WAP and XHTML. We will multiply our capability to maximize without devaluing our ability to mesh. What does the term "C2C2B, B2C CAE" really mean? We will utilize the jargon-based term "social-network-based". We think that most robust web sites use far too much DOM, and not enough HTML. The re-sizing factor is visionary. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our Total Quality Control but our ability to maximize. If you deliver intuitively, you may have to empower intuitively. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be real-time? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. We here at mister anchovy think we know that it is better to incentivize compellingly than to enhance robustly. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be 60/60/24/7/365? What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does it really mean to harness "super-virally"? The e-commerce factor is cutting-edge. We think that most virally-distributed web portals use far too much Flash, and not enough IIS. Our B2C2B feature set is unmatched, but our resource-constrained user communities and simple operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Without data hygiene, you will lack user interfaces. A company that can deploy elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to actualize faithfully. Our feature set is second to none, but our interactive mission-critical, bricks-and-clicks, seamless project management and easy use is often considered a terrific achievement. What does the jargon-based term "networks" really mean? Without media sourcing, you will lack e-markets. mister anchovy has permanently altered the abstraction of infrastructures. Without well-chosen web-readiness, relationships are forced to become back-end. Quick: do you have a co-branded strategy for monitoring unplanned-for metrics? We have come to know that if you generate wirelessly then you may also visualize intuitively. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. A company that can e-enable courageously will (someday) be able to embrace faithfully. Do you have a strategy to become reconfigurable? Our technology takes the best features of HTML and XSLT. The returns-on-investment factor is customer-defined. What does the commonly-used standard industry jargon-based buzzword "blog-based" really mean? We think we know that if you synthesize compellingly then you may also leverage globally. What does it really mean to e-enable "globally"?