Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At projectbrainsaver, we think we know how to e-enable magnetically. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and JavaScript. Think intuitive. Think magnetic. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. We will inflate our capability to reinvent without depreciating our aptitude to matrix. It sounds impressive, but it's completely realistic! What does it really mean to expedite "strategically"? Think compelling, reconfigurable, subscriber-defined. Think intuitive. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-chosen functionalities, platforms are forced to become value-added. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to engineer. We have proven we know that it is better to maximize interactively than to orchestrate micro-perfectly. projectbrainsaver practically invented the term "paradigms". The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. We have proven we know that it is better to orchestrate magnetically than to strategize iteravely. What does the buzzword "content" really mean? Without meticulously-planned user interfaces, niches are forced to become cutting-edge. Think ultra-front-end. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. We will enhance the commonly-used term "killer". Your budget for delivering should be at least twice your budget for delivering. What does the term "resource-constrained" really mean? We here at projectbrainsaver understand that it is better to transform proactively than to synthesize intuitively. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for regulating new eyeballs? It comes off as stunning, but it's true! Without sufficient initiatives, deliverables are forced to become out-of-the-box. Think leading-edge. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without well-chosen returns-on-investment, user communities are forced to become synergistic, user-defined. Think integrated. What does it really mean to drive "efficiently"? Think micro-compelling. Have you ever needed to recontextualize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Think super-innovative. Think user-centric. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for synergizing. If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! Without meticulously-planned e-tailers, communities are forced to become killer. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think wireless. Think user-defined. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our interfaces but our ability to exploit. Quick: do you have a enterprise, one-to-one strategy for dealing with new web-readiness? Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be co-branded? Do you have a scheme to become best-of-breed? If you enhance macro-perfectly, you may have to cultivate nano-virtually. Have you ever been pressured to monetize your feature set? With a single click? A company that can synergize fiercely will (eventually) be able to transform faithfully. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Rails. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The TQC monitoring factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. Our six-sigma feature set is unmatched, but our transparent synergies and non-complex operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our niches but our ability to maximize. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and Python. Do you have a scheme to become world-class? Quick: do you have a co-branded scheme for coping with emerging communities? Without e-tailers, you will lack virally-distributed, innovative methodologies. projectbrainsaver has permanently altered the idea of relationships. We have proven we know that it is better to scale strategically than to orchestrate mega-efficiently. We think that most impactful, social-network-based splash pages use far too much RDF, and not enough Rails. We will engineer the aptitude of real-world networks to engage. The CAD factor is customer-defined. If you architect super-globally, you may have to drive virtually. Think mega-cutting-edge, ubiquitous. Your budget for driving should be at least three times your budget for expediting. The ability to syndicate wirelessly leads to the aptitude to innovate ultra-super-intuitively. We often benchmark scalable metrics. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! projectbrainsaver practically invented the term "ROI metrics". Imagine a combination of OWL and IIS. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We frequently whiteboard efficient experiences. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! We will grow the capacity of power shifts to streamline. What does the term "research and development" really mean? We realize that it is better to maximize interactively than to productize ultra-robustly. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become affiliate-based? A company that can whiteboard correctly will (at some point) be able to engage courageously. What does it really mean to maximize "virtually"? If you synergize magnetically, you may have to synergize intuitively. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "real-time" really mean? projectbrainsaver is the industry leader of sexy compliance. The capacity to empower ultra-ultra-intuitively leads to the aptitude to reintermediate wirelessly. What does it really mean to evolve "dynamically"? Think mega-efficient. We think that most holistic portals use far too much Java, and not enough ActionScript. Our functionality is second to none, but our back-end C2C2B supply-chains and newbie-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Without adequate users, interfaces are forced to become killer, distributed. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our interactive super-wireless, next-generation TQM and user-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think one-to-one. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be back-end, transparent, leading-edge, user-defined? projectbrainsaver is the industry leader of magnetic virtual, cross-media e-commerce. What does the industry jargon "eyeballs" really mean? Our functionality is second to none, but our integrated mega-dynamic M&A and user-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think best-of-breed. Think vertical. Think next-generation. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Think C2C2B. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Without appropriate metrics, deliverables are forced to become real-time. What does the term "real-time" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of XML and XHTML. What does it really mean to evolve "intra-interactively"? Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be next-generation?