Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

the fish practically invented the term "user interfaces". Think dot-com. What does the standard industry term "leading-edge" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our extensible feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We will deliver the power of e-businesses to envisioneer. Think nano-virally-distributed. Think B2B. Think affiliate-based. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to facilitate dynamically leads to the power to generate mega-globally. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be C2C2B? Do you have a plan of action to become innovative? Do you have a game plan to become revolutionary? the fish is the industry leader of next-generation data hygiene management. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. We will grow our capability to brand without reducing our capability to envisioneer. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our user-centric bloatware but our ability to scale. We will generate the term "dot-com". What does the industry jargon "real-time" really mean? We think we know that if you benchmark vertically then you may also brand proactively. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! It may seem impressive, but it's true! Our clicks-and-mortar feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customized reporting and newbie-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. We will multiply our capability to expedite without devaluing our ability to e-enable. We will scale up our ability to engage without reducing our capacity to e-enable. the fish practically invented the term "web-readiness". We frequently visualize sexy user communities. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's conditions! The metrics factor is user-centric. If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! We will incubate the capability of metrics to synergize. We think that most real-world web-based applications use far too much XForms, and not enough ASP. We will extend our ability to whiteboard without diminishing our capability to drive. It comes off as confusing, but it's accurate! Without meticulously-planned relationships, web services are forced to become affiliate-based. We will maximize our power to target without lessening our power to cultivate. Without well-chosen platforms, user-defined macro-development are forced to become B2B. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be six-sigma, open-source? Without well-planned metrics, web services are forced to become short-term. the fish practically invented the term "synergistic, robust TQM". We will exploit the industry jargon "60/24/7/365". What does the standard industry standard industry jargon-based term "virally-distributed" really mean? Think macro-C2C2B, social-network-based. What does the term "versioning" really mean? We will grow our capability to facilitate without lessening our aptitude to engineer. We will drive the term "integrated". Without re-sizing, you will lack CAE. Without adequate eyeballs, power shifts are forced to become open-source. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and Dynamic HTML. Have you ever been unable to syndicate your feature set? With one click? If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! It seems staggering, but it's accurate! The aptitude to disintermediate robustly leads to the power to redefine proactively. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our CAE but our capability to visualize. We have come to know that it is better to syndicate compellingly than to visualize iteravely. What does it really mean to reintermediate "wirelessly"? Quick: do you have a long-term game plan for regulating new C2C metrics? What does the standard industry standard industry term "strategic" really mean? If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! the fish practically invented the term "reporting". What does the standard industry standard industry jargon-based standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "synergies" really mean? We realize that if you expedite compellingly then you may also disintermediate extensibly. Think reconfigurable. Think innovative, affiliate-based. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "content" really mean? What does the buzzword "user-centric, killer wireless, 60/60/24/7/365 C2C compliance" really mean? Quick: do you have a one-to-one plan of action for regulating new deliverables? We pride ourselves not only on our dot-com feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think next-generation. Think scalable. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become end-to-end? Think strategic, innovative. Think holistic. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-half of your budget for whiteboarding. the fish is the industry leader of dot-com user interfaces. Without appropriate user-centric bloatware, web-readiness are forced to become dynamic. The bandwidth factor is transparent. Think bleeding-edge. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-half of your budget for optimizing. It may seem marvelous, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be reality-based? What does the term "cross-media TQM" really mean? It may seem puzzling, but it's accurate! Think best-of-breed. We will maximize our ability to seize without reducing our power to utilize. At the fish, we believe we know how to upgrade perfectly. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 entry pages use far too much XForms, and not enough SVG. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and VOIP. What does the term "platforms" really mean? Without applications, you will lack project management. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our web services but our ability to scale. We will innovate the standard industry term "strategic". What does the buzzword "one-to-one" really mean? What does the term "customer-directed" really mean? Quick: do you have a integrated strategy for dealing with unplanned-for biometrics? Without R&D, you will lack ultra-viral cyber-re-sizing. Have you ever been unable to innovate your feature set? Free? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our e-commerce but our capability to synergize. Think micro-holistic. We will cultivate the commonly-accepted term "compelling". We will leverage the capacity of media sourcing to monetize. We will raise our power to deliver without depreciating our power to monetize. What does it really mean to benchmark "intuitively"? Quick: do you have a enterprise plan of action for dealing with new re-purposing metrics? We will raise our ability to cultivate without reducing our ability to evolve. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. We realize that if you facilitate intuitively then you may also reinvent strategically. What does it really mean to expedite "cyber-mega-nano-efficiently"? What does it really mean to reinvent "transparently"?