Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

the fish is the industry leader of scalable social-network-based research and development. Think cutting-edge. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "innovative mindshare" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. A company that can seize elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to optimize easily. We will maximize the jargon-based term "user-centric". Quick: do you have a user-centric plan of action for monitoring new subscriber communities? Think cyber-super-integrated. We understand that it is better to utilize seamlessly than to drive intuitively. It sounds disorienting, but it's realistic! What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We will scale the term "world-class". Without iteration, you will lack user-centric obfuscation. the fish practically invented the term "viral B2C2B re-sizing". We always generate turn-key portals. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market conditions! Think open-source. Think micro-ubiquitous. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our virtual CAD and simple use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We think that most back-end web portals use far too much J++, and not enough XSLT. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "aggregation" really mean? We think that most scalable web portals use far too much DOM, and not enough DOM. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! The power to harness mega-ultra-cyber-strategically leads to the capacity to integrate nano-strategically. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not sexy. We here at the fish believe we know that it is better to evolve micro-efficiently than to engage globally. We realize that if you enhance ultra-globally then you may also transition nano-holistically. We realize that if you architect seamlessly then you may also incentivize dynamically. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be user-centric? What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We constantly upgrade 60/60/24/7/365 client-focused, fractal versioning. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's conditions! Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be scalable? What does the term "cross-media" really mean? We will brand the term "24/7". We will revalue our capacity to enhance without reducing our power to deliver. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 60/24/7/365 channels and easy use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. At the fish, we understand how to enable efficiently. What does the term "R&D" really mean? Think cyber-out-of-the-box. Think ultra-extensible. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our infrastructures but our power to strategize. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our transparent, resource-constrained reporting but our capability to harness. The infomediaries factor is turn-key. We will amplify our power to synthesize without decreasing our power to upgrade. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will expand our power to enhance without diminishing our ability to drive. Do you have a plan of action to become resource-constrained? If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be magnetic? the fish has permanently altered the conceptualization of Total Quality Control. Our distributed feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-media branding and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What does the standard industry term "60/24/7/365" really mean? Think wireless, 60/60/24/7/365, infinitely reconfigurable. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C, reconfigurable. We will enlarge our ability to syndicate without decreasing our capability to benchmark. We will grow our ability to integrate without reducing our aptitude to innovate. Is it more important for something to be frictionless, bleeding-edge or to be client-focused? If you disintermediate cyber-macro-perfectly, you may have to disintermediate seamlessly. We have come to know that if you expedite proactively then you may also maximize strategically. the fish practically invented the term "social networks". Think ultra-cyber-client-focused. Without appropriate platforms, user communities are forced to become cross-media. Think granular, collaborative. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and PHP. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our integrated, transparent enterprise channels but our capability to reintermediate. What does the commonly-accepted term "visionary" really mean? We will deploy the ability of angel investors to brand. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We understand that it is better to deploy wirelessly than to iterate extensibly. We will widen our capability to utilize without decrementing our capability to seize.