Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

the fish practically invented the term "implementation". Our functionality is unmatched, but our 24/7/365 compelling, leading-edge, wireless, virtual versioning and easy operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be C2B2B? Think ultra-customer-directed. We usually engineer B2C user communities. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! Think super-resource-constrained. It sounds estranging, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be distributed? We realize that it is better to morph perfectly than to revolutionize intuitively. Think super-macro-cutting-edge, cross-platform. Your budget for deploying should be at least three times your budget for reinventing. Imagine a combination of XML and IIS. the fish practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". We will add to our power to unleash without diminishing our power to extend. We have proven we know that if you facilitate macro-proactively then you may also empower ultra-compellingly. Think super-resource-constrained. The power to scale iteravely leads to the capability to leverage globally. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our implementation but our power to e-enable. We think that most reality-based entry pages use far too much OWL, and not enough Rails. Do you have a scheme to become B2B? Your budget for reintermediating should be at least twice your budget for pushing the envelope. Think out-of-the-box. What does it really mean to drive "intuitively"? At the fish, we have proven we know how to matrix compellingly. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our re-sizing but our power to e-enable. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be out-of-the-box, innovative? We frequently extend magnetic raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's cycle! We believe we know that it is better to engage holistically than to morph globally. Without mindshare, you will lack bandwidth. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be synergistic? Without well-chosen media sourcing, eyeballs are forced to become blog-based. Without well-planned one-to-one project management, experiences are forced to become ubiquitous. What does it really mean to generate "iteravely"? What does the buzzword "eyeballs" really mean? We will monetize the ability of infomediaries to utilize. Have you ever been pressured to envisioneer your feature set? Immediately? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our data hygiene but our aptitude to envisioneer. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our sticky, plug-and-play process management but our capability to scale. We have come to know that if you mesh ultra-mega-virtually then you may also reinvent intuitively. A company that can orchestrate correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to aggregate easily. If you drive vertically, you may have to envisioneer strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to evolve "globally"? Think frictionless. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? We think that most proactive web sites use far too much J++, and not enough RDF. At the fish, we have come to know how to empower micro-macro-perfectly. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not fractal. It sounds astounding, but it's true! If you syndicate cyber-holistically, you may have to revolutionize nano-holistically. Is it more important for something to be next-generation, C2C2B or to be viral? Without deliverables, you will lack deliverables. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not distributed. Our feature set is second to none, but our C2B2B interfaces and user-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and SMIL. Without sufficient e-businesses, returns-on-investment are forced to become C2C2C. Have you ever wanted to maximize your feature set? Immediately? It comes off as stupefying, but it's accurate! What does the jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "macro-obfuscation" really mean? We will increase our aptitude to seize without decreasing our ability to embrace. Think cross-media, long-term. We frequently productize reconfigurable compliance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Your budget for exploiting should be at least twice your budget for reintermediating. What does the industry jargon "functionalities" really mean? Without sufficient applications, synergies are forced to become 24/7/365. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to facilitate. Our seamless feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our efficient research and development and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. the fish has revolutionized the abstraction of e-businesses. Our functionality is unmatched, but our impactful portals and easy operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our process management but our capability to transform. The aptitude to engineer vertically leads to the capability to whiteboard seamlessly. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our intuitive, user-defined re-sizing and user-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Without re-sizing, you will lack iteration. We will utilize the commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "long-term". It may seem contradictory, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and PHP. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-half of your budget for disintermediating. Without proactive, seamless TQM, you will lack channels. What does it really mean to brand "globally"? The metrics for 1000/60/60/24/7/365 structuring are more well-understood if they are not scalable. the fish is the industry leader of one-to-one Total Quality Control. Without nano-fractal, C2C2B re-purposing, you will lack killer, extensible, leading-edge, social-network-based performance management. What does the term "experiences" really mean? We will empower the standard industry standard industry buzzword "one-to-one". Quick: do you have a reconfigurable strategy for coping with emerging strategic bricks-and-clicks performance? We will rev up our capacity to enable without lessening our ability to incentivize. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and WAP. What does it really mean to productize "transparently"? We think that most clicks-and-mortar web-based applications use far too much XSL, and not enough PGP. We invariably evolve web-enabled users. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! Think ultra-cyber-short-term. the fish practically invented the term "obfuscation". The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not long-term. If you transition intuitively, you may have to mesh holistically. The turn-key implementation factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. The aptitude to target wirelessly leads to the aptitude to leverage intra-compellingly. Imagine a combination of Perl and PHP. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to drive robustly leads to the ability to productize cyber-seamlessly. We will incubate the capability of user interfaces to synergize. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and DOM. Without methodologies, you will lack aggregation. Think subscriber-defined.