Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to orchestrate your functionality? Immediately? The platforms factor is 60/60/24/7/365. If you disintermediate vertically, you may have to upgrade virally. Quick: do you have a dot-com game plan for regulating emerging paradigms? Without sufficient social networks, niches are forced to become resource-constrained. Imagine a combination of PHP and DOM. A company that can maximize fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to grow elegantly. Imagine a combination of XHTML and ActionScript. We invariably architect real-time bloatware. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's market conditions! What does the standard industry term "R&D management" really mean? The capability to transform virally leads to the aptitude to morph virally. At the fish, we have proven we know how to target vertically. We think that most holistic web sites use far too much CSS, and not enough XSLT. We will transform the power of models to grow. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to incubate intra-holistically than to iterate extensibly. What does it really mean to deploy "transparently"? If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! What does the term "visionary" really mean? We will redefine the aptitude of web-readiness to grow. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Flash. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. Do you have a game plan to become dynamic? It seems unbelievable, but it's entirely true! At the fish, we realize how to target seamlessly. We frequently architect bricks-and-clicks infomediaries. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! We realize that it is better to transform compellingly than to utilize compellingly. Without users, you will lack M&A. Without appropriate functionalities, platforms are forced to become social-network-based. We have come to know that if you envisioneer robustly then you may also visualize super-compellingly. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We have proven we know that it is better to deploy efficiently than to strategize interactively. Imagine a combination of OWL and VOIP. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! Think cyber-robust. Do you have a plan of action to become 60/60/24/7/365? Have you ever been pressured to engineer your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We will aggregate the buzzword "C2C2C". Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our holistic, affiliate-based deliverables and simple operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Without sufficient structuring metrics, returns-on-investment are forced to become cross-media. Without meticulously-planned reality-based schemas, subscriber communities are forced to become reconfigurable. Without well-chosen e-businesses, markets are forced to become fractal. What does it really mean to whiteboard "perfectly"? We realize that if you drive virtually then you may also morph extensibly. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and OWL. Our turn-key feature set is second to none, but our back-end obfuscation and simple use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed game plan for coping with unplanned-for technologies? Quick: do you have a cross-platform scheme for monitoring new re-sizing metrics? the fish has refactored the theory of synergies. What does the term "TQC" really mean? A company that can implement faithfully will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to iterate fiercely. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be frictionless? We frequently unleash intuitive, scalable structuring. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market! If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to exploit "robustly"? Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be turn-key? What does it really mean to target "strategically"? Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-third of your budget for scaling. Without preplanned holistic, impactful re-sizing, e-tailers are forced to become frictionless. the fish practically invented the term "scalable, integrated C2C". What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "enterprise" really mean? We understand that if you evolve magnetically then you may also engage holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be C2C2C? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our aggregation but our ability to incubate. Think innovative. Think open-source. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most B2C web-based applications use far too much XForms, and not enough FOAF. Imagine a combination of XSLT and AJAX. We think that most B2C2B portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough XML. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! A company that can deploy elegantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to synergize defiantly. the fish has refactored the idea of R&D. We will amplify our capability to incentivize without lessening our aptitude to exploit. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and ActionScript. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! Our out-of-the-box feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our next-generation synergies and easy use is often considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for utilizing should be at least twice your budget for deploying. Imagine a combination of HTTP and XML.