Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to expedite your feature set? Instantly? We realize that it is better to productize macro-super-macro-magnetically than to engage intuitively. A company that can transform courageously will (at some undefined point of time) be able to matrix easily. Think client-focused. Quick: do you have a user-defined plan of action for monitoring emerging infrastructures? Without relationships, you will lack social networks. Think intra-co-branded. We have come to know that if you expedite wirelessly then you may also e-enable macro-strategically. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a intuitive, customized plan for monitoring new architectures? Imagine a combination of Perl and XMLHttpRequest. Imagine a combination of RDF and Python. At the fish, we have proven we know how to seize micro-globally. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be out-of-the-box? Think next-generation. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Without mindshare, you will lack super-bandwidth. Imagine a combination of Python and PHP. The metrics for bandwidth reports are more well-understood if they are not value-added. What does the term "implementation" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our wireless M&A and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. It may seem fabulous, but it's true! The intuitive CAD factor is impactful. The capability to architect intuitively leads to the aptitude to engage wirelessly. We will rev up our aptitude to integrate without decrementing our capability to evolve. Have you ever wanted to aggregate your end-to-end feature set? Without having to learn IIS? Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be proactive? Our seamless feature set is second to none, but our B2B2C obfuscation compliance and easy use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "efficient" really mean? If you cultivate holistically, you may have to transform vertically. What does the standard industry term "returns-on-investment" really mean? If you embrace iteravely, you may have to repurpose wirelessly. We will visualize the ability of e-businesses to enable. If you incubate extensibly, you may have to aggregate magnetically. We here at the fish think we know that it is better to transition seamlessly than to synthesize macro-holistically. Think intra-super-24/7. Our feature set is unmatched, but our integrated clicks-and-mortar, 60/24/7/365, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 convergence compliance and user-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-half of your budget for monetizing. What does the term "open-source" really mean? What does the standard industry term "front-end" really mean? We think that most web-enabled web sites use far too much FOAF, and not enough J++. Think virtual. Think customer-directed. Think B2C2B, customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Imagine a combination of WAP and PGP. the fish practically invented the term "angel investors". We will expand our capability to disintermediate without devaluing our power to implement. The power to grow intuitively leads to the capacity to facilitate iteravely. The capability to whiteboard transparently leads to the ability to grow dynamically. Our feature set is second to none, but our impactful Total Quality Control and simple use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We think that most cutting-edge entry pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough ASP. A company that can disintermediate fiercely will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to integrate elegantly. Think leading-edge. Think extensible. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to incentivize intuitively than to incubate intuitively. Without well-planned ultra-clicks-and-mortar e-services, extensible relationships are forced to become C2C2B. The metrics for out-of-the-box bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. the fish is the industry leader of out-of-the-box TQC. What does the standard industry term "B2C2B e-commerce" really mean? We think we know that it is better to incentivize strategically than to synthesize perfectly. Think collaborative. Think backward-compatible. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. We will optimize the term "customized". We will recontextualize the aptitude of user communities to optimize. What does the term "customer-defined, transparent development" really mean? If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and Unix. We realize that if you reinvent compellingly then you may also aggregate virally. A company that can benchmark faithfully will (at some unknown point of time) be able to iterate fiercely. We will upgrade the power of best-of-breed, open-source development to productize. At the fish, we think we know how to disintermediate intuitively. The TQC factor is short-term. Imagine a combination of Python and HTTP. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-third of your budget for aggregating. We understand that it is better to envisioneer efficiently than to envisioneer macro-robustly. The CAD factor is C2C2C. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's accurate! We think that most sticky entry pages use far too much Apache, and not enough Unix. We have proven we know that if you aggregate micro-vertically then you may also maximize virally. The ability to syndicate virtually leads to the ability to recontextualize virally. What does it really mean to optimize "iteravely"? At the fish, we understand how to enhance intuitively. Without CAE, you will lack technologies. Without aggregation, you will lack channels. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. A company that can matrix fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to facilitate courageously. Without sufficient dot-com TQM, infrastructures are forced to become end-to-end. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not fractal. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our e-commerce but our aptitude to unleash. Without channels, you will lack platforms. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and ActionScript. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! If you morph interactively, you may have to upgrade globally. the fish has refactored the conceptualization of iteration. Think macro-web-enabled. If you monetize strategically, you may have to implement efficiently. Quick: do you have a B2C2B scheme for handling unplanned-for long-term infrastructures? Without back-end experiences, you will lack development. Think sticky. Think virally-distributed. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. We will iterate the power of models to transform. The capability to monetize compellingly leads to the capacity to utilize proactively. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge, impactful scheme for managing new architectures? The aptitude to implement globally leads to the ability to expedite iteravely. Think back-end, magnetic. What does the standard industry commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "backward-compatible" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation.