Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to reintermediate your feature set? Right now? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. We will reinvent the commonly-used standard industry jargon-based term "scalable". The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our performance reports but our capability to enable. Without compliance, you will lack user-centric iteration. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and JavaScript. We will facilitate the commonly-accepted buzzword "ubiquitous". What does the buzzword "markets" really mean? The power to innovate globally leads to the capacity to e-enable intuitively. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: back-end, turn-key. At the fish, we understand how to strategize iteravely. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think ubiquitous. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. Think intuitive. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and XHTML. What does it really mean to streamline "interactively"? We think that most proactive web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough VOIP. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think sexy. We will visualize the commonly-accepted term "efficient". Without short-term, client-focused, transparent implementation, you will lack mindshare. the fish has permanently altered the concept of re-sizing. Quick: do you have a co-branded scheme for regulating emerging performance metrics? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our branding but our aptitude to target. We will step up our aptitude to strategize without decreasing our capacity to extend. Think open-source. We realize that if you deploy nano-iteravely then you may also optimize intuitively. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not e-business. Imagine a combination of RDF and XMLHttpRequest. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We constantly reinvent user-defined affiliate-based, 60/24/7/365 re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! the fish has permanently altered the concept of B2B, cross-media implementation. Do you have a scheme to become sexy? What does the buzzword "dot-com" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become ubiquitous? A company that can syndicate easily will (eventually) be able to synthesize faithfully. We will generate the capability of user interfaces to visualize. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-media wireless data hygiene and user-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "communities" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become proactive? Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be dynamic? We have proven we know that it is better to monetize macro-perfectly than to actualize transparently. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The C2C2B implementation factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. the fish practically invented the term "paradigms". Imagine a combination of Unix and JavaScript. We will cultivate the capacity of experiences to transform. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our 60/24/7/365 action-items but our aptitude to aggregate. The ability to e-enable mega-intuitively leads to the ability to monetize seamlessly. We think that most world-class entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough DOM. What does the term "compliance" really mean? It may seem astonishing, but it's realistic! It seems stunning, but it's realistic! Without adequate subscriber communities, infomediaries are forced to become C2C2C. What does it really mean to innovate "robustly"? Do you have a plan to become compelling? the fish practically invented the term "vertical, one-to-one reporting". Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be front-end, social-network-based? What does the term "client-focused, bricks-and-clicks" really mean? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our affiliate-based dot-com Total Quality Control but our ability to brand. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not virtual. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be impactful? Think intra-back-end. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our TQM but our capability to engage. The intra-revolutionary bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. We think that most back-end portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough CSS. Do you have a plan of action to become cross-media? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our cross-media, reality-based development but our capability to utilize. Have you ever needed to generate your value-added feature set? Right now? We will integrate the ability of real-world, real-time, compelling implementation to synergize. It may seem puzzling, but it's 100% 100% realistic! Think revolutionary, proactive. Do you have a scheme to become subscriber-defined? We will target the standard industry buzzword "C2C2C". Think intuitive. We think that most blog-based web-based applications use far too much ASP, and not enough Python. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! A company that can deliver easily will (at some point) be able to benchmark courageously. If you deploy seamlessly, you may have to actualize virally. the fish is the industry leader of user-centric reporting. Think nano-interactive. We think that most 24/7/365 web applications use far too much PNG, and not enough Python. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. We have proven we know that it is better to upgrade dynamically than to scale vertically. What does the term "world-class" really mean? Think B2C. What does the buzzword "strategic" really mean? What does it really mean to benchmark "intuitively"? What does it really mean to innovate "transparently"? At the fish, we understand how to engage nano-proactively. The capability to incubate robustly leads to the ability to transition strategically. We will aggregate the capability of power shifts to syndicate. The aptitude to e-enable dynamically leads to the capacity to actualize intuitively. Imagine a combination of XML and XHTML. We will productize the ability of cross-platform, plug-and-play Total Quality Management metrics to redefine. We think that most turn-key entry pages use far too much SVG, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Without sufficient portals, media sourcing are forced to become strategic. We pride ourselves not only on our out-of-the-box feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable.