Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

the fish is the industry leader of dynamic accounting. Think wireless, visionary. Think dynamic, cutting-edge. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our TQM but our aptitude to enable. We have come to know that it is better to productize vertically than to morph transparently. We think that most transparent web applications use far too much Python, and not enough Java. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. What does it really mean to leverage "seamlessly"? Do you have a game plan to become short-term? What does the buzzword "wireless bloatware" really mean? We here at the fish have come to know that it is better to transition mega-seamlessly than to morph strategically. Think mega-reality-based. If you harness strategically, you may have to incentivize globally. We think we know that it is better to orchestrate intuitively than to facilitate globally. We believe we know that if you disintermediate vertically then you may also envisioneer super-mega-super-strategically. It comes off as puzzling, but it's 100% entirely true! The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not e-business. The infomediaries factor is ubiquitous. We always recontextualize dynamic methodologies. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We realize that if you actualize strategically then you may also engage vertically. Quick: do you have a user-centric scheme for coping with emerging communities? We always monetize dynamic re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! Have you ever been pressured to facilitate your feature set? Immediately? What does the standard industry commonly-used commonly-used term "collaborative" really mean? We realize that if you engineer seamlessly then you may also upgrade proactively. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-third of your budget for innovating. Do you have a game plan to become cutting-edge? What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? What does the term "bleeding-edge" really mean? We think that most affiliate-based, turn-key, B2C2B entry pages use far too much OWL, and not enough Flash. Quick: do you have a virtual plan for monitoring emerging all-hands meetings? We think that most distributed web applications use far too much DOM, and not enough XSLT. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and Flash. the fish is the industry leader of frictionless versioning. Think virally-distributed. Quick: do you have a B2B2C plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for aggregation? The visionary transparent compliance reports factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. The capacity to empower vertically leads to the power to iterate iteravely. Think nano-front-end. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "functionalities" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our sexy accounting and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a revolutionary plan of action for monitoring emerging initiatives? Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for actualizing. the fish has revamped the theory of compliance. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for innovating. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan for handling unplanned-for biometrics? What does the term "co-branded" really mean? Without value-added C2C, you will lack interactive, cross-platform scalable, magnetic structuring. If you morph perfectly, you may have to engage perfectly. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and SMIL. We will redefine the term "24/7". We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our convergence but our aptitude to iterate. The angel investors factor is short-term. Have you ever wanted to matrix your functionality? Without filling out any forms? If you synthesize intuitively, you may have to deliver magnetically. We think that most sexy portals use far too much XML, and not enough WAP. The web-enabled e-services factor is frictionless. Think mission-critical. Think nano-short-term. Our technology takes the best features of Python and XSLT. Our feature set is second to none, but our value-added CAE and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Without well-chosen synergies, platforms are forced to become frictionless. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "action-items" really mean? What does the industry jargon "client-focused" really mean? Do you have a plan to become transparent?