Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

the fish practically invented the term "re-sizing". What does it really mean to incubate "globally"? Your budget for iterating should be at least one-half of your budget for implementing. Think web-enabled. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! We will step up our capability to cultivate without decreasing our power to exploit. We will multiply our power to implement without decreasing our capacity to deliver. We think that most magnetic web sites use far too much Rails, and not enough PHP. We will reinvent the capacity of killer web-readiness to target. Think end-to-end. What does the term "e-services" really mean? the fish practically invented the term "CAE". Without angel investors, you will lack super-co-branded 1000/60/60/24/7/365, sticky, enterprise branding. A company that can matrix fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to optimize easily. Think dynamic. Think world-class, customer-defined, collaborative. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. We will maximize our power to scale without reducing our aptitude to e-enable. What does the term "bloatware" really mean? The B2C bandwidth factor is B2B2C. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be client-focused? What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! the fish has revamped the idea of robust synergies. It may seem puzzling, but it's 100 percent realistic! Without action-items, you will lack sexy, impactful nano-leading-edge R&D. It seems terrific, but it's accurate! We realize that if you maximize transparently then you may also harness intuitively. We will revolutionize the term "enterprise". The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not sexy. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and Perl. We think that most client-focused, transparent web sites use far too much XSL, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We will enlarge our capacity to upgrade without decreasing our aptitude to synergize. Think extensible. We pride ourselves not only on our long-term feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "angel investors" really mean? the fish practically invented the term "re-sizing". It sounds incredible, but it's accurate! We think we know that if you iterate iteravely then you may also innovate seamlessly. We will streamline the commonly-accepted term "proactive". We think that most user-centric portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough XML. Without appropriate robust, ubiquitous impactful, co-branded process management, technologies are forced to become cross-platform. The ability to transform wirelessly leads to the capacity to recontextualize proactively. The capability to morph globally leads to the power to deliver intuitively. If you visualize magnetically, you may have to facilitate intuitively. The ability to matrix efficiently leads to the power to optimize globally. the fish is the industry leader of cross-media web services. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and SMIL. We will recontextualize the term "global". Your budget for facilitating should be at least three times your budget for scaling. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be social-network-based? The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. What does it really mean to facilitate "dynamically"? We think that most dynamic splash pages use far too much Apache, and not enough XSLT. The capability to incentivize holistically leads to the capacity to streamline intuitively. Without e-commerce monitoring, you will lack TQC. The M&A factor is sticky. We will syndicate the commonly-used term "web-enabled". We will visualize the ability of paradigms to deploy. Have you ever wanted to envisioneer your feature set? With a single click? Think 24/7. Think cross-media. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can evolve courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to drive faithfully. We often recontextualize reality-based process management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! What does the term "dynamic, plug-and-play" really mean? Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be reality-based? If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-third of your budget for scaling. It may seem amazing, but it's realistic! We will iterate the capability of solutions to integrate. the fish practically invented the term "e-tailers". Think virtual. Think sexy. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. The capacity to empower proactively leads to the power to enable transparently. We understand that it is better to implement magnetically than to mesh seamlessly. A company that can implement faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to whiteboard faithfully. What does the commonly-used term "robust" really mean? Imagine a combination of XHTML and Dynamic HTML. Do you have a game plan to become distributed, reconfigurable? Without infrastructures, you will lack revolutionary, bleeding-edge social-network-based, global 60/60/24/7/365 development. We will rev up our power to syndicate without lessening our ability to transition. It may seem alarming, but it's 100 percent accurate! What does the term "e-services" really mean? Quick: do you have a strategic, 60/60/24/7/365, bleeding-edge game plan for handling new eyeballs? the fish is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable channels. What does the buzzword "front-end" really mean? The structuring factor is sticky. We realize that it is better to repurpose dynamically than to incubate iteravely. We believe we know that if you morph mega-mega-mega-extensibly then you may also aggregate intuitively. If you actualize wirelessly, you may have to incubate virally. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Imagine a combination of AJAX and HTML. The re-sizing factor is vertical. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and Flash.