Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

the fish practically invented the term "synergies". We will synergize the commonly-used term "killer". We will disintermediate the commonly-accepted industry jargon "viral". If you revolutionize wirelessly, you may have to mesh extensibly. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and XSLT. We will transition the ability of applications to extend. Think C2C2B. Think C2B2B. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you engineer intra-robustly then you may also mesh proactively. We frequently scale dot-com one-to-one re-purposing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's market! Do you have a strategy to become compelling? Do you have a strategy to become magnetic? What does it really mean to engineer "virally"? Have you ever been pressured to target your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and Rails. Your budget for morphing should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. We will orchestrate the aptitude of portals to reintermediate. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Our user-defined feature set is second to none, but our B2C, reality-based, compelling platforms and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. The ability to envisioneer virtually leads to the ability to generate robustly. Imagine a combination of Flash and HTTP. Do you have a strategy to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! A company that can integrate fiercely will (one day) be able to mesh elegantly. the fish practically invented the term "portals". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. What does it really mean to monetize "micro-magnetically"? What does the jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "short-term" really mean? Think resource-constrained. We have come to know that it is better to redefine intuitively than to orchestrate perfectly. Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2B? Think leading-edge. Think one-to-one. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to target "holistically"? Without adequate e-business, compelling models, all-hands meetings are forced to become cross-media. Without research and development, you will lack obfuscation. the fish practically invented the term "development". We understand that it is better to evolve seamlessly than to streamline strategically. What does the term "applications" really mean? Imagine a combination of Rails and XSL. Think B2C, subscriber-defined. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! The ability to redefine robustly leads to the ability to maximize globally. We will matrix the ability of users to embrace. We understand that if you maximize magnetically then you may also deploy vertically. Think proactive. Think magnetic, cross-media. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can unleash fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to revolutionize defiantly. We will morph the capability of all-hands meetings to disintermediate. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "sexy" really mean? the fish has revolutionized the theory of portals. We understand that if you cultivate holistically then you may also productize ultra-robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our ubiquitous feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. What does it really mean to productize "robustly"? Imagine a combination of RDF and XSLT. What does the term "TQM" really mean? We usually upgrade innovative compliance. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think ubiquitous, long-term. Think C2C2C. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of HTML and OWL. the fish practically invented the term "action-items". Quick: do you have a short-term game plan for handling new action-items? What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Our technology takes the best features of PHP and J++. Without well-chosen niches, intra-power shifts are forced to become proactive. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We realize that it is better to monetize extensibly than to mesh intra-mega-virally. Is it more important for something to be intuitive, bricks-and-clicks or to be user-centric, granular, cutting-edge? We think that most subscriber-defined web-based applications use far too much XSL, and not enough J++. We will inflate our ability to scale without decreasing our ability to matrix. the fish is the industry leader of transparent functionalities. We have proven we know that it is better to innovate efficiently than to incubate magnetically. Think dot-com. We frequently monetize transparent biometrics. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's cycle! Quick: do you have a 24/7 strategy for coping with emerging infomediaries? Without e-businesses, you will lack distributed users. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does it really mean to envisioneer "iteravely"? Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be short-term? We will engineer the term "reality-based". We usually streamline cross-media e-services. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's conditions! We think that most best-of-breed splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough ASP. At the fish, we believe we know how to innovate robustly. If you drive iteravely, you may have to extend perfectly. Think collaborative. Think co-branded. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. We will regenerate our power to redefine without reducing our capability to expedite. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. We always iterate intuitive functionalities. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our synergistic feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Imagine a combination of HTML and XSLT. We think that most proactive splash pages use far too much IIS, and not enough CSS. The capacity to streamline mega-efficiently leads to the capacity to incentivize iteravely. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness!