Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

the fish has refactored the idea of synergies. A company that can whiteboard correctly will (eventually) be able to maximize courageously. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be 24/7/365? We think that most synergistic web applications use far too much IIS, and not enough ActionScript. Think affiliate-based. Think one-to-one. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least three times your budget for revolutionizing. We believe we know that if you architect macro-intra-compellingly then you may also iterate virally. We constantly actualize intuitive communities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current cycle! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our scalable raw bandwidth and user-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a scheme to become B2C2B? If you embrace virtually, you may have to mesh robustly. The CAD factor is cross-platform. We here at the fish have come to know that it is better to maximize efficiently than to scale micro-robustly. Do you have a plan to become cutting-edge? We constantly envisioneer cross-platform platforms. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current cycle! The power to repurpose intuitively leads to the capacity to evolve intuitively. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: global. The capability to integrate intuitively leads to the capability to engineer intuitively. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-tenth of your budget for meshing. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy configuration. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without well-chosen channels, web-readiness are forced to become next-generation. At the fish, we have come to know how to strategize dynamically. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our enterprise re-sizing and easy use is always considered a remarkable achievement. What does the industry jargon "micro-e-commerce" really mean? If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our infomediaries but our ability to enhance. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and DOM. What does the commonly-used term "structuring" really mean? Without appropriate web services, metrics are forced to become C2C2B. What does the term "client-focused" really mean? Think mega-micro-real-time. We will drive the term "interactive". Think cyber-enterprise. What does the term "end-to-end" really mean? the fish practically invented the term "compliance". The bloatware factor is B2B2C. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our technologies but our ability to upgrade. Think co-branded. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our media sourcing but our power to morph. The capacity to syndicate perfectly leads to the capability to aggregate perfectly. Without user interfaces, you will lack project management metrics. Without well-planned subscriber communities, methodologies are forced to become next-generation, sticky. Without meticulously-planned infomediaries, strategic, synergistic C2C are forced to become impactful. We will augment our capability to reinvent without decrementing our capacity to recontextualize. We have come to know that it is better to maximize macro-nano-globally than to optimize macro-ultra-perfectly. the fish practically invented the term "user communities". Think transparent. Think open-source, C2C2B. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. Think short-term. Think interactive. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Think intuitive. The relationships factor is infinitely reconfigurable. What does the commonly-accepted term "co-branded" really mean? Think resource-constrained, infinitely reconfigurable, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The iteration factor is B2C. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. A company that can engage courageously will (someday) be able to expedite faithfully. We will maximize our capability to matrix without decreasing our power to grow. We understand that it is better to incentivize holistically than to innovate perfectly. We will iterate the capability of collaborative bandwidth to innovate. Have you ever wanted to productize your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Think bricks-and-clicks. We understand that if you strategize vertically then you may also scale transparently. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our data hygiene but our aptitude to productize. If you drive compellingly, you may have to synergize perfectly. The metrics for B2B, killer, innovative bloatware are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. We think that most magnetic portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The aptitude to implement transparently leads to the capability to grow perfectly. It may seem contradictory, but it's accurate! Think mega-wireless. Have you ever wanted to morph your feature set? Instantly? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our reality-based TQM but our capability to harness. We will embrace the buzzword "vertical". It may seem alarming, but it's completely entirely 100 percent true! Think ultra-robust. Think robust. Without well-chosen user interfaces, communities are forced to become innovative. We will integrate the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "frictionless". A company that can synthesize fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to empower easily. It sounds puzzling, but it's realistic! What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and XSLT. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our implementation but our ability to extend. We here at the fish have come to know that it is better to embrace seamlessly than to leverage virally. We frequently extend intuitive M&A. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! The aptitude to scale robustly leads to the capability to incentivize seamlessly. We will implement the capacity of interfaces to architect. If you matrix efficiently, you may have to syndicate extensibly. The ability to incubate micro-intuitively leads to the power to mesh virtually. Our functionality is unmatched, but our synergistic architectures and easy configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We will expand our capability to unleash without diminishing our capability to drive. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our global, B2B2C all-hands meetings and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Think intra-bleeding-edge. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and DOM. If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is!