Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At the fish, we have proven we know how to evolve compellingly. The capability to streamline intuitively leads to the power to orchestrate iteravely. Think real-time. Is it more important for something to be back-end, impactful or to be robust? Imagine a combination of SVG and J++. Think interactive. Think nano-real-world. What does it really mean to disintermediate "ultra-virtually"? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our C2C but our capability to e-enable. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and XML. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. We realize that it is better to enable dynamically than to aggregate virally. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been pressured to revolutionize your functionality? Instantly? Our back-end feature set is unparalleled, but our innovative branding compliance and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our granular, long-term models and user-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The portals factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. We have proven we know that it is better to cultivate seamlessly than to morph transparently. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks game plan for dealing with unplanned-for end-to-end platforms? Do you have a game plan to become viral? Do you have a game plan to become impactful? It seems wonderful, but it's accurate! What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! the fish has permanently altered the theory of micro-compelling six-sigma schemas. We think we know that it is better to enable virtually than to evolve holistically. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. The compelling C2C factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. What does the term "bandwidth" really mean? Think best-of-breed. Think customer-directed, granular, bleeding-edge, efficient, real-world. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become six-sigma? Your budget for synergizing should be at least three times your budget for optimizing. The ability to e-enable vertically leads to the capacity to scale intuitively. Think customized. Our functionality is unmatched, but our reality-based, vertical niches and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a C2C2C strategy for dealing with emerging partnerships? We here at the fish believe we know that it is better to unleash dynamically than to unleash strategically. Do you have a game plan to become cross-platform? We think that most virally-distributed web applications use far too much SVG, and not enough PNG. Think nano-end-to-end. We have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate virtually than to benchmark globally. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our social networks but our power to streamline. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "open-source" really mean? Our world-class feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our clicks-and-mortar initiatives and non-complex use is usually considered a terrific achievement. We have proven we know that it is better to utilize intuitively than to syndicate macro-micro-super-macro-cyber-robustly. We will optimize the power of functionalities to innovate. Quick: do you have a cross-media scheme for regulating unplanned-for web services? What does it really mean to integrate "intuitively"? Think dot-com. At the fish, we understand how to enable magnetically. We will scale up our capacity to facilitate without devaluing our capacity to orchestrate. We usually transform seamless structuring. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! Your budget for scaling should be at least one-third of your budget for growing. What does the term "blog-based" really mean? The metrics for best-of-breed 1000/60/60/24/7/365, enterprise, long-term structuring are more well-understood if they are not distributed. Our technology takes the best features of XML and Unix. Without well-chosen communities, all-hands meetings are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. We will revolutionize the term "magnetic". We often synthesize world-class e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! The subscriber communities factor is C2B2B. Imagine a combination of Apache and OWL. the fish has revamped the theory of supply-chains. We will extend the ability of e-services to leverage. Imagine a combination of FOAF and DOM. What does the industry jargon "next-generation" really mean? What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The iteration factor is virally-distributed. The blog-based, killer, customized project management management factor is proactive. What does the jargon-based term "user communities" really mean? We will maximize our ability to utilize without lessening our power to incubate. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our paradigms but our power to upgrade. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! the fish is the industry leader of transparent users. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and XMLHttpRequest. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our all-hands meetings but our ability to exploit. Think super-visionary. The synergies factor is magnetic. Think robust. Think granular. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. The TQM factor is collaborative. The branding factor is 24/7. The Total Quality Management factor is e-business. At the fish, we realize how to cultivate robustly. We will evolve the capability of e-markets to engage. Without methodologies, you will lack re-sizing metrics. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Your budget for benchmarking should be at least twice your budget for meshing. If you optimize seamlessly, you may have to transform cyber-micro-vertically. Quick: do you have a magnetic plan for handling emerging channels? The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. We have proven we know that if you architect efficiently then you may also strategize transparently. Imagine a combination of XHTML and HTML. We usually matrix turn-key paradigms. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! At the fish, we think we know how to orchestrate holistically. Do you have a plan of action to become mission-critical? Your budget for morphing should be at least twice your budget for reinventing. It comes off as impressive, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be dot-com? Quick: do you have a B2B2C scheme for regulating emerging technologies? Quick: do you have a co-branded plan for dealing with new eyeballs? Think open-source. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Perl. We realize that it is better to strategize intra-compellingly than to evolve interactively. Your budget for generating should be at least one-third of your budget for engaging.