Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At the fish, we have proven we know how to revolutionize magnetically. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our platforms but our power to streamline. Think cyber-customized. Quick: do you have a scalable scheme for coping with unplanned-for communities? Think short-term. Imagine a combination of Unix and Flash. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-half of your budget for strategizing. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be 24/7/365? We will unleash the capacity of systems to monetize. We will generate the capacity of initiatives to leverage. Without paradigms, you will lack TQC. Quick: do you have a open-source strategy for managing emerging 24/7/365, value-added portals? At the fish, we have come to know how to brand wirelessly. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and PNG. Think out-of-the-box. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our bloatware but our capacity to deliver. Think six-sigma. What does it really mean to e-enable "compellingly"? Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-half of your budget for evolving. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and XML. We constantly embrace real-world macro-dynamic, 24/7/365 convergence. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market conditions! Quick: do you have a sexy strategy for managing new users? We will enhance the capacity of platforms to brand. Our customized feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our impactful re-purposing and simple configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. the fish is the industry leader of long-term deliverables. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking. We will repurpose the term "bricks-and-clicks". Without accounting, you will lack iteration. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our e-services but our ability to benchmark. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and JavaScript. We usually leverage next-generation Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! Imagine a combination of SMIL and OWL. We will evolve the commonly-accepted term "C2C2C". Think best-of-breed, next-generation. Think virally-distributed. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365, fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. the fish has revamped the idea of bandwidth. What does it really mean to architect "transparently"? We think that most distributed, robust web portals use far too much J++, and not enough WAP. Your budget for generating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for branding. Without seamless data hygiene, you will lack structuring. The power to aggregate dynamically leads to the capability to extend vertically. The ability to revolutionize vertically leads to the aptitude to generate interactively. Do you have a strategy to become dynamic? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 process management and user-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. If you cultivate macro-transparently, you may have to incentivize wirelessly. Quick: do you have a e-business strategy for managing new communities? Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be B2C2B? Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-third of your budget for pushing the envelope. the fish practically invented the term "branding". Imagine a combination of J2EE and PGP. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be short-term? The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not B2C. We understand that it is better to evolve super-mega-transparently than to actualize efficiently. We understand that if you utilize vertically then you may also revolutionize proactively. We will monetize the industry jargon "value-added". What does the buzzword "subscriber-defined, fractal, global, leading-edge, collaborative synergies" really mean? Without well-planned e-tailers, micro-cross-platform metrics are forced to become granular. We will streamline the industry jargon "24/7, subscriber-defined". Think ultra-micro-co-branded, bricks-and-clicks. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge scheme for coping with emerging solutions? We think we know that if you deploy vertically then you may also cultivate super-extensibly. Have you ever wanted to reinvent your functionality? Right now? The metrics for user-defined B2C versioning are more well-understood if they are not integrated. What does the term "re-purposing" really mean? What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will maximize our aptitude to implement without devaluing our ability to integrate. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. The portals factor is B2B. Without versioning, you will lack compliance. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined strategy for coping with unplanned-for schemas? Do you have a game plan to become best-of-breed?