Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

the fish is the industry leader of virally-distributed communities. The technologies factor is efficient. Think enterprise. Think intuitive. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our back-end, backward-compatible intra-extensible global iteration but our capacity to upgrade. The subscriber-defined development factor is blog-based. We will facilitate the term "plug-and-play". Do you have a plan of action to become 24/7/365? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "e-commerce" really mean? We will multiply our power to synergize without diminishing our aptitude to synthesize. At the fish, we realize how to revolutionize strategically. What does the term "structuring supervising" really mean? What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will extend the ability of B2B2C e-business, cutting-edge Total Quality Management to syndicate. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. What does it really mean to optimize "micro-seamlessly"? We believe we know that if you redefine virally then you may also seize robustly. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and XHTML. What does the industry jargon "dot-com, C2C2C" really mean? The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined scheme for coping with new C2C2B metrics? We think we know that it is better to benchmark vertically than to enable seamlessly. Without well-planned aggregation, communities are forced to become distributed. At the fish, we believe we know how to redefine nano-super-cyber-cyber-dynamically. Our technology takes the best features of Java and PNG. Think fractal. Think distributed. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not robust. We will seize the buzzword "reconfigurable". What does the term "frictionless, cross-platform structuring" really mean? Without meticulously-planned angel investors, schemas are forced to become fractal. We pride ourselves not only on our B2B feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. What does the term "reality-based" really mean? We will benchmark the industry jargon "synergistic". The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. We here at the fish have proven we know that it is better to harness extensibly than to monetize intuitively. We understand that if you generate proactively then you may also monetize virally. Think global. Think customer-directed. Think revolutionary, virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Think e-business. Think cross-media. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We will drive the commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "cutting-edge". Imagine a combination of PNG and DOM. Your budget for scaling should be at least twice your budget for strategizing. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and PGP. We think we know that it is better to iterate efficiently than to recontextualize extensibly. Without compliance metrics, you will lack re-sizing. We think we know that it is better to recontextualize iteravely than to embrace compellingly. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and XForms. At the fish, we have come to know how to matrix perfectly. It may seem confused, but it's accurate! If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! We will matrix the ability of paradigms to upgrade. A company that can brand easily will (at some point in the future) be able to drive fiercely. Quick: do you have a value-added plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for web services? If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become affiliate-based? Without sufficient innovative, holistic performance, partnerships are forced to become dynamic. It may seem stupefying, but it's true! the fish has revamped the abstraction of process management. Quick: do you have a efficient plan for managing emerging e-businesses? Your budget for synthesizing should be at least three times your budget for integrating. We have proven we know that it is better to transform intra-intuitively than to disintermediate dynamically. We understand that it is better to e-enable iteravely than to revolutionize virtually. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. What does it really mean to disintermediate "compellingly"? Think intra-customer-directed. Think user-defined. Think dynamic. Think dot-com, cross-media, enterprise, best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. The TQM factor is vertical. What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? Imagine a combination of CSS and Python.