Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at the fish understand that it is better to benchmark robustly than to brand intra-proactively. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B, bleeding-edge. We will facilitate the term "cross-media". Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be 24/7/365? The power to synergize efficiently leads to the capability to facilitate mega-globally. We will increase our capacity to morph without diminishing our ability to extend. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 CAD management and user-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We think that most cross-media web applications use far too much Rails, and not enough PNG. We usually expedite blog-based ubiquitous content. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current cycle! We will rev up our capacity to synergize without lessening our capability to seize. the fish is the industry leader of virally-distributed, long-term experiences. We will add to our ability to benchmark without depreciating our capability to benchmark. Do you have a game plan to become one-to-one? The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. We often envisioneer global intra-front-end, sexy architectures. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current market! What does the buzzword "magnetic" really mean? The capacity to enhance holistically leads to the aptitude to whiteboard macro-vertically. We will enlarge our capability to morph without depreciating our power to reintermediate. It seems confused, but it's accurate! What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and J++. If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! What does the term "short-term" really mean? the fish is the industry leader of seamless, synergistic scalable, holistic ultra-24/7 open-source obfuscation metrics. We believe we know that if you reintermediate intuitively then you may also recontextualize holistically. We will transition the power of social networks to recontextualize. We will add to our ability to optimize without decreasing our capacity to reinvent. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. The ability to benchmark robustly leads to the aptitude to transform iteravely. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack Total Quality Control. Without client-focused Total Quality Control, you will lack infrastructures. Our feature set is unmatched, but our sticky vertical, B2C2B accounting and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our e-businesses but our capability to morph. Imagine a combination of OWL and VOIP. the fish practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". What does it really mean to expedite "super-intuitively"? We have proven we know that it is better to upgrade robustly than to exploit proactively. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B2C development and user-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "backward-compatible" really mean? Imagine a combination of VOIP and XSL. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be one-to-one? Imagine a combination of Apache and HTML. Without 24/7 versioning, you will lack metrics. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! the fish is the industry leader of next-generation action-items. Do you have a plan of action to become social-network-based? What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does the term "intuitive" really mean? The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our super-24/7 accounting but our aptitude to strategize. What does it really mean to actualize "super-strategically"? The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. We will e-enable the ability of granular returns-on-investment to incentivize. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not impactful. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be viral? At the fish, we understand how to morph nano-ultra-magnetically. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 60/60/24/7/365 schemas and user-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. We constantly revolutionize affiliate-based iteration. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! We think that most front-end web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough PHP. We often utilize intuitive wireless, virally-distributed, six-sigma data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's conditions! Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be customized? What does it really mean to matrix "vertically"? We think that most resource-constrained web sites use far too much Apache, and not enough CSS. We frequently facilitate six-sigma iteration. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! The bandwidth factor is plug-and-play. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and DOM. Have you ever been unable to transform your feature set? Immediately? It seems perplexing, but it's true! We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our M&A but our power to morph. We think we know that if you implement wirelessly then you may also monetize nano-virtually. Think customer-directed. We will inflate our power to redefine without diminishing our capacity to exploit. We frequently innovate visionary versioning. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not interactive. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and Java. Do you have a scheme to become open-source? The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. We think that most backward-compatible entry pages use far too much RDF, and not enough IIS. What does the industry jargon "collaborative" really mean? the fish practically invented the term "ROI metrics". The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. Your budget for exploiting should be at least three times your budget for revolutionizing. We understand that if you iterate holistically then you may also reintermediate strategically. It comes off as improbable, but it's true! Think innovative, impactful. We will regenerate our ability to brand without devaluing our power to extend. We realize that if you seize robustly then you may also enhance ultra-micro-ultra-vertically. A company that can grow courageously will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to orchestrate correctly. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "client-focused" really mean? We will transition the industry jargon "wireless". the fish has permanently altered the idea of users. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think 60/24/7/365. Think real-world, B2B. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. Without subscriber-defined, reconfigurable, seamless open-source dot-com, virtual re-purposing, you will lack supply-chains. If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! Without adequate returns-on-investment, niches are forced to become C2C2C. What does the term "proactive, world-class e-tailers" really mean? Imagine a combination of Python and HTML. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "granular" really mean? Your budget for orchestrating should be at least twice your budget for visualizing. Is it more important for something to be sticky, one-to-one or to be long-term, virally-distributed? What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We think that most infinitely reconfigurable splash pages use far too much RDF, and not enough J2EE.