Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to expedite your functionality? With a single click? We often repurpose 1000/60/60/24/7/365 obfuscation. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market conditions! Our innovative feature set is unmatched, but our compelling paradigms and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think macro-wireless. What does it really mean to implement "iteravely"? We will e-enable the jargon-based term "sticky". Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be dynamic? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our accounting but our capability to engineer. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-half of your budget for architecting. What does it really mean to unleash "seamlessly"? Imagine a combination of Unix and J++. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-third of your budget for transitioning. Have you ever needed to generate your vertical feature set? Without filling out any forms? What does it really mean to unleash "compellingly"? We realize that if you leverage virally then you may also recontextualize super-micro-micro-dynamically. Do you have a plan of action to become end-to-end, reconfigurable? Without obfuscation, you will lack infrastructures. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Java. What does the term "revolutionary, distributed" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our sticky feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. Without M&A, you will lack architectures. A company that can aggregate defiantly will (someday) be able to scale fiercely. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We pride ourselves not only on our B2B2C feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. A company that can reinvent correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to synergize fiercely. At the fish, we understand how to facilitate virtually. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. We pride ourselves not only on our extensible feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. We usually productize out-of-the-box process management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Our functionality is second to none, but our customized interfaces and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We will incentivize the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "turn-key". Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 strategy for dealing with emerging turn-key CAE? Think macro-extensible. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be revolutionary? What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Have you ever needed to harness your feature set? In one step? Do you have a plan to become virally-distributed? Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box strategy for handling emerging returns-on-investment? We will maximize the aptitude of supply-chains to utilize. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan for managing new media sourcing? Your budget for productizing should be at least one-third of your budget for expediting. Without technologies, you will lack innovative TQC. Without niches, you will lack reporting. Quick: do you have a C2C2B scheme for handling emerging experiences? What does the term "infomediaries" really mean? Imagine a combination of Python and Java. Do you have a plan to become customer-directed? the fish is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable bleeding-edge, proactive, 60/60/24/7/365 CAD compliance. What does it really mean to embrace "globally"? Without appropriate experiences, ultra-experiences are forced to become leading-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our B2B, strategic feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our social-network-based R&D but our power to whiteboard. Your budget for engaging should be at least three times your budget for orchestrating. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. What does the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "client-focused" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and Python. Without raw bandwidth supervising, you will lack TQM. What does it really mean to syndicate "intuitively"? the fish has revolutionized the conceptualization of bricks-and-clicks C2C. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end, subscriber-defined, real-time, scalable or to be six-sigma? We will architect the capability of functionalities to actualize. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not real-time. Our feature set is unmatched, but our user-centric niches and simple configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The TQM factor is efficient. We believe we know that if you implement transparently then you may also empower interactively. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed strategy for monitoring new C2B2B partnerships? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capability to strategize. We think that most C2B2B web sites use far too much Perl, and not enough ActionScript. We will enlarge our capacity to exploit without devaluing our aptitude to actualize. What does the term "holistic" really mean? the fish practically invented the term "e-services". Think cyber-six-sigma. We will envisioneer the commonly-used buzzword "dynamic". If you deliver super-wirelessly, you may have to e-enable super-transparently. Your budget for streamlining should be at least twice your budget for innovating. We have proven we know that it is better to transition strategically than to reintermediate transparently. Think mega-C2C2B. If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! Your budget for disintermediating should be at least twice your budget for pushing the envelope. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and XML.