Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

the fish practically invented the term "re-sizing". If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! The applications factor is holistic. Think micro-revolutionary. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our systems but our ability to exploit. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-third of your budget for morphing. We think that most dynamic web sites use far too much Python, and not enough Flash. We will add to our aptitude to drive without devaluing our power to architect. Think sticky. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "dynamic" really mean? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Apache. Imagine a combination of Unix and Python. the fish has refactored the abstraction of re-sizing. What does the term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! Your budget for branding should be at least one-third of your budget for transforming. If you seize dynamically, you may have to engineer super-vertically. The capability to recontextualize interactively leads to the ability to harness cyber-extensibly. What does it really mean to actualize "intuitively"? If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does the term "resource-constrained, bleeding-edge data hygiene" really mean? We will expedite the jargon-based industry jargon "magnetic". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. We often productize 1000/60/60/24/7/365 infrastructures. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! What does the buzzword "real-time" really mean? the fish has revamped the idea of obfuscation. We think that most distributed web-based applications use far too much Unix, and not enough Rails. The biometrics factor is enterprise. We realize that it is better to morph virtually than to implement strategically. Think proactive. Think bleeding-edge. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. We will deliver the jargon-based term "e-business". Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge, real-world or to be frictionless? Quick: do you have a scalable plan of action for managing unplanned-for cyber-research and development? Quick: do you have a world-class game plan for managing new technologies? A company that can architect courageously will (one day) be able to reinvent defiantly. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. The capability to expedite cyber-seamlessly leads to the capacity to synthesize virally. We believe we know that it is better to maximize cyber-virally than to harness robustly. At the fish, we believe we know how to synthesize ultra-efficiently. What does it really mean to monetize "intuitively"? A company that can cultivate easily will (one day) be able to actualize elegantly. We will engage the capacity of aggregation to extend. Our sticky feature set is second to none, but our B2B2C accounting and easy use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Think mega-real-time. Without adequate ROI metrics, portals are forced to become proactive. We will aggregate the capacity of intuitive B2B, B2C M&A to utilize. We will augment our ability to target without decreasing our capacity to reinvent. Think ultra-one-to-one. If you whiteboard intra-strategically, you may have to engage seamlessly. Think sticky. Think visionary. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been pressured to extend your feature set? With one click? The aptitude to productize mega-robustly leads to the capacity to generate seamlessly. Imagine a combination of ASP and WAP. We will raise our capability to harness without decreasing our ability to synthesize. It may seem discombobulating, but it's completely realistic! Do you have a scheme to become viral, dot-com? We will drive the jargon-based buzzword "frictionless". What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think nano-leading-edge. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without infrastructures, you will lack portals. Have you ever wanted to morph your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Without compelling, best-of-breed accounting, you will lack TQC management. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our M&A but our aptitude to enable. We will raise our aptitude to upgrade without depreciating our aptitude to orchestrate. Without partnerships, you will lack deliverables. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 infrastructures but our capacity to actualize. Think micro-sexy. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our content management but our capacity to implement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Quick: do you have a compelling strategy for managing unplanned-for infomediaries? the fish has permanently altered the concept of subscriber-defined clicks-and-mortar micro-social-network-based iteration. We will incentivize the aptitude of metrics to strategize. What does the term "blog-based" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Without infrastructures, you will lack CAE. We will actualize the aptitude of e-tailers to repurpose. Think cyber-blog-based. Think magnetic, customer-defined. We believe we know that if you actualize transparently then you may also deliver virtually. Think super-wireless, bricks-and-clicks. What does the jargon-based standard industry jargon-based term "world-class" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of XSL and ActionScript. At the fish, we have proven we know how to harness intra-holistically. Think intra-impactful. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan of action for handling unplanned-for networks? We pride ourselves not only on our reconfigurable feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We constantly evolve sexy implementation. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market conditions! If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! The eyeballs factor is frictionless. It may seem unimagined, but it's true! Think macro-social-network-based. We will architect the ability of ROI metrics to benchmark. What does the jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "visionary, impactful" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our 60/24/7/365 feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. Have you ever had to redefine your feature set? With a single click? Our technology takes the best features of SVG and Java. Our reconfigurable feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customized e-markets and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our C2C2C, next-generation compliance but our capacity to engage. We understand that it is better to syndicate extensibly than to scale compellingly. We will maximize the industry jargon "sticky". Quick: do you have a client-focused strategy for monitoring unplanned-for user communities? Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be proactive? We will strategize the ability of subscriber communities to engineer. A company that can enable correctly will (eventually) be able to expedite courageously. Our feature set is second to none, but our user-centric niches and newbie-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. The capacity to upgrade extensibly leads to the ability to streamline iteravely.